#he looks like death tho why is he playing if he’s sick 😭😭
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pyotrkochetkov · 1 year ago
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👉🏼👌🏼
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gyunglitter · 1 year ago
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- just you dicking around with txt college!au besties
warnings: not edited, kinda long, mentions of gym bros, bitchless behavior, drunk fighting, mentions of camp rock, cursing, prolly should’ve put that last before the other lmao, partying, suspicious tampering with drinks
tags: txtxreader (platonic), non-idol!au, college!au, txt, lag, tomorrowxtogether, lesserafim, hansohee, drabble fics!, bulletpoint fics!
notes: bro i’ve been sitting on this for a while, but since i got sick, i finally had the time to actually write this—not very drabble fic of me, but i hope yall enjoyed it :) feel free to send in asks/requests abt this au!!
⚤ masterlist
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just how did this rag tag group get together?
tbh with yall
the losers club took a while to actually get established
like
we’re talkin the end of the winter semester babes
to be fair tho☝️🤓
each of you were either awkward, antisocial, or autistic
but you all came around eventually
through small and simple means, the hottest friend group came to be!!
yeonjun + taehyun:
met in calc 101 in the winter semester
taehyun needed the class for his major
but yeonjun accidentally stumbled in on the first day and felt too awkward to leave
he tried to play it cool like he totally belonged
but taehyun could tell right when he sat next to him and his gigantic water bottle and protein shake
it only sealed the deal when yeonjun asked to borrow a pencil
“thanks! oh wow…i don’t think i’ve seen a pencil like this”
“it’s a mechanical..?”
“aha, yeaaaaaah…”
they really looked like 🤨 and ✌🏽🤪✌🏽
the both of them simultaneously felt transported back to their high school days
with yeonjun’s jockiness and taehyun’s brutal deadpan
the two intimidated the HELL out of each other😭
they were extremely awkward despite trying to act like they weren’t they totally were
but that hour of calc was pure torture
yeonjun made sure to stay far away from the engineering building after that lmao
it was only when they accidentally ran into each other at the gym that they bonded
after yeonjun almost dropped the bar on himself and his initial spotter got distracted
he swore he was gonna quite literally off himself at that moment
yeonjun was surprised to see the small kid from calc save him from his death with only ONE arm
an arm that was as big as HIS HEAD?!?! :O
after that, the two saw each other very often and became the ultimate Gym Bros🔥💪🏽
which took a lot of emotional work on both ends after their traumatic high school days
but taehyun STANS yeonjun and his diligence to zumba!
while yeonjun admires taehyun’s pull game when they go to the club together!
they became an unlikely platonic match made in heaven :D
soobin + hueningkai:
this friendship was DESPERATE
to be fr
soobin was LONELY :(
he’d be starting his third year of college and had yet to find his forever-friends his therapist promised he’d make once he made it to college!!
it wasn’t until he met his double at the Video and Audio Enthusiasts club meeting
a club created solely to use the conputer and projector room from 5-6pm every thursday to watch jujutsu kaisen without the faculty knowing
soobin had been apart of the club since his sophomore year when it started, but there was only so much socializing he could do with the same three people who come
at least until a very green freshman!kai walked in!!
it was kai’s first semester and first week away from home
and boy was he nervous
his older sister who had just graduated from the same college forced him to sign up for clubs in order to make good friends
she held his precious molang plushie hostage until he came back with proof of signing up for at least one club :(
BUT HE WAS SO OVERWHELMED AT CLUB RUSH??
all these ppl pitching why their club was so great with their bright posters, over enthusiastic campaigners, and loud music blasting from portable speakers???
kai just wanted to go back to his room and down the tub of mint choco he left in his mini fridge
but alas
the things he does for molang !! >.<
he signed up for the audio and visual enthusiasts club solely bc there was only one person manning the table
and she was knocked out
so when he signed up, he skedaddled out of there with the intention of showing up to one meeting before staging a dramatic but undeniable leave of absence
for the rest of the year >:)
little did he know his first day would bring him an adorable, lanky man who would never leave him alone!!
fr tho
soobin saw this 6’0 child who gave off “i WILL bit you” vibes and said
“he’s mine”
and the rest was history tbh
you never really see one without the other with the way they leech on to each other
the two of them honestly are complete angels together
beomgyu + you:
now
YOU TWO
if soobin and kai are angels, yall are the goddamn devils💀
you guys actually met your freshman year
you shared a lot of the same generals, but didn’t interact that much
mainly bc beomgyu was typically either gaming or sleeping in
meanwhile you always showed up to class zooted
unlike your classes that focused on your major, your generals were classes you couldn’t care less about
and your grades sure did show for it😬
your parents and teachers were worried you were gonna flunk out after your first semester and lose your scholarship
it wasn’t until the two of you were thrown together for a group project that things changed
forced proximity trope🥵
but not for the reasons you’re thinking!!
instead of working together, pulling all nighters, and trauma bonding together
you guys were the only ones slacking during all of the group meetings
the both of you succeed in pissing the other members off as yall constantly showed up late, distracted each other with origami cranes/airplanes/SMASH, and once got the group kicked out of the library for trying to secretly smoke a bowl behind the stacks
but you blamed that on beomgyu and his weak lungs
safe to say, you and beomgyu did a great job of alienating yourselves from the other members in your group
(fun fact: soobin was one of them—he HATED yall)
but you two ultimately bonded after skipping one of the meetings when you bumped into each other on campus and decided to go to the arcade down the street instead LMAO
after successfully beating him at the racing games and letting him win the sharpshooter games, the two of you were inseparable!!
especially since yall flunked that class and had to take it again the next semester lmao
you almost lost your scholarship
but for the rest of your classes, beomgyu helped you cram for your exams!
turns out your stoner-gamer-boy-bestie used to be student body vice president in high school??
he helped you pass the rest of your classes your freshman and sophomore years, in exchange you let him collect all your scarabs😭
hueninkai + taehyun:
this friendship is so cute omg
this came during winter semester, after kai established a friendship with soobin and restored some of his self-confidence
and with all his new, interesting classes finally catering to his curious nature
kai had started to branch out of his shell and thrive in the college environment
he still didn’t have any friends besides soobin, but he faced everyday with a bright smile :)
and then there was taehyun
fall semester had not been kind to him, having no time for socializing quite yet :(
poor taehyun at the time was exhausted from his ridiculous workload and would show up to class half dead each morning
BUT IN COMES HYUKA THE ANGEL😭
the two shared a life skills class and were seat mates
kai noticed taehyun’s state each morning
which wasn’t too hard since taehyun was slumped over his desk every morning and only woke up when class started
and sometimes not even then
in response, kai had kindly made a habit of bringing taehyun a coffee each morning and leaving it on his desk :(
not only that, kai was always just a natural energizer!
with his positive attitude and earnest countenance, taehyun couldn’t help but feel ready to take on the day as well !
as thanks, there never failed to be a copy of the answer key to whatever test was coming up on hueningkai’s desk the next day
taehyun really is THAT man🥵
ngl hyuka felt like he had a sugar daddy of sorts at the beginning
but the two have the sweetest friendship after that!!
they’re genuinely so grateful for each other and balance out really well
yeonjun + you + beomgyu:
a friendship that started off contractually
it was the winter semester of your sophomore year and you were in a bit of an artistic drought
the last time your work had taken off was a complete accident
you’d been high off your ass and posted a hodgepodge of the last 10 screenshots in your camera roll, smartly titled “Hell is A Teenage Girl”
it gained so much attention for its authenticity and now you had no idea how to follow THAT up :(
your bestie beomgyu constantly offered to model for you
but you could never take him seriously after he showed up to your house in lingerie so you could “picture him like your french girls”
“that’s not even how it goes, headass”
“it’s called taking ‘creative liberties’, birdbrain—and you’re supposed to be the artist?”
“please…just put some clothes on. i can’t take you seriously when your balls are in my face”
anyways
you were struggling to come up with anything after that stunt
until you saw your muse in him
the him being yeonjun, who came straight from zumba and was currently downing a bowl of ramyeon from the caf
you shared no classes, interests, or mutuals
but one thing you had in common?
you both thought he was hot!!
you had cornered him with the abrupt confession that he had the most "photograph-able" face and you needed to shoot him for a new project of yours
(with compensation, of course)
yall looked like 🫵🙂📷 and ⁉️😗🍜
yeonjun reluctantly agreed since he was broke and needed more ramyeon money
the shoot started off kind of uncomfortable since you two were incredibly awkward
but you eventually warmed up to each other with your terrible jokes that made him die laughing!
you never would've pegged him as a pun-lover, but you were certainly not disappointed :)
as the shoot finished up, you ended up going out for ice cream together
to which beomgyu crashed and ended up fighting with yeonjun about everything under the sun
it all started with yeonjun’s preference for mint choco, that everything started to go up in flames lmao
you were sure yeonjun would want nothing to do with the pair of you after that night
BUT THEN THE PICTURES WENT VIRAL
your work blew up once again and yeonjun got many modelling offers!!
with the newfound clout given to yeonjun, came an unlikely partnership between you two as you brought out the best in each other’s works
and with you, came beomgyu as a package deal
the two eventually ended up bonding as time went on and they discovered they shared many interests
but you were the glue to hold them together for a while since they never failed to get on each other’s nerves
tom and jerry fr🙄
everyone:
after a draining week of school and his zumba class getting cancelled, yeonjun decided he wanted to go to a party
he needed a drink and a good excuse to dance since his feet were happy and his hips were in need of speaking their truth
lucky for him, there was supposed to be a CRAZY RAGER this weekend
yeonjun was told it was thrown by some uppclassmen named jackson wang or something?
🤷‍♀️
BUT IT WAS PERFECT!!
but he couldn't go alone--he'd look like a loser
which he's NOT >:(
so he brought his gym bro, taehyun!
but then the two were faced with the predicament of looking like much worse
homosexuals!! :0
god forbid two men hang out in public
so taehyun brought his other bestie, kai!!
but mans hates large social gatherings and would rather drown in his toilet than watch the musclemen pull the pretty girls he was afraid of
so he brought the also bitchless soobin along to keep himself entertained :D
meanwhile you were also getting dragged to the party by beomgyu, whose band had gigged it, since he needed emotional support!
the event had started off fine!
beomgyu was killing it with his band
soobin and kai were awkwardly curbing girls' stares and suspicious drinks sent their way with queries as to a foursome
yeonjun was in the middle of a mosh pit, getting absolutely wrecked
taehyun was getting danced on by not one, but TWO girls
AT THE SAME TIME
and you were currently crowd surfing despite having no recollection as to how you got there
you were honestly not vibing since you had a slight fear of heights
and an aversion to sweaty men in closed spaces
so when you were eventually put down, you stumbled your way back to the kitchen to get a breather
and maybe a shot while you were at it—god knows you need one to get through the rest of the night
however, your plans halted once you caught sight of your beloved ex-group partner from biochem!!
“woah hey, soobie-boobie?!” you hollered
cue soobin, who was in the middle of a heated rant about the band refusing his request of playing “meant to be” by bebe rexha, freezing with a soulless look in his eyes
it was you
you (+beomgyu, btw) were the reason he had to pull multiple all nighters to complete your part of the project you failed to do the previous year
mans nearly lost the will to live during that project
he’d hated yall with a passion and did NOT fail to snitch after the project was submitted
it was bc of him that you had to retake that class and almost get your scholarship revoked
of course, nobody knew it was him, since he was a sly motherfucker and blamed it on kim chaewon instead
but he planned on taking that secret with him to the grave, since he would rather take a nap on the freeway than deal with confrontation
but he had no reason to, by the way you were calling for him with the dopiest smile on your face
he hoped he could get away with ignoring you since it was so loud
but then you let out a screech that pierced the heavens
“SOOBIE BOOBIE TOOBIE WOOBIE FOOBIEEEEE!!”
hhnggg
he closed his eyes to block out the sight of you now standing on the counter and waving your arms like crazy
if he couldn’t see you, then you didn’t exist
but, unfortunately, soobin wasn’t the only person with eyes and ears
“hey, hyung, i dunno if it’s just me, but i think that girl might know you!”
soobin opened his eyes to see kai waving back at the girl for him
soobin wanted to die when he saw you take that as confirmation to join them
“hey! long time no see!!” you greeted as you took a seat with the pair of them
hyuka easily took to you while soobin tried his best not to look utterly disgusted
“so how do you two know each other?” kai asked
“soobin and i were paired for a group project last year!”
soobin frowned at you, but you were none the wiser as you entertained the curious kai
“oh cool!! what class was that?”
“honestly, i have no clue! i was high half the school year, thank god soobin was there to help me and my other friend for that project!”
soobin scoffed at that, causing both you and kai to look at him questioningly
“was that a cough?”
“did you need a drink?” you innocently offered one of the many drinks the boys had discarded
soobin shook his head vigorously at that, making you shrug
“welp, more for me then!”
AND DOWNED IT
kai and soobin were too slow to stop you, and watched in horror as you finished the drink with a pinched expression
“holy shit, are you okay?!” soobin asked
but you were preoccupied with the upset feeling in your stomach
“ugh, what the hell was that?” you tried to stop yourself from burping, but you could feel yourself getting lightheaded
“ah man, i knew those drinks weren’t safe” kai winced, watching as you nearly fell out of your seat before soobin caught you
soobin groaned at the prospect of having to take care of you, but lifted you up a bit while you babbled and whisked yourself out of his hold
“hey, im fine—i actually feel great! we should go dance!”
and you were off, dragging an innocent kai with you to where the rest of the party was dancing to the band
not wanting to be left alone after you so rudely took his only friend, soobin ran after the pair of you
meanwhile kai, who had been dragged with you, felt like he was gonna have a panic attack in the face of all these people you dragged him toward
he felt like he was getting swallowed up in a sea of drunk, horny young adults
which, technically, he was
you were none the wiser to the boy’s fears as you started dancing
to hueningkai’s absolute horror, you were actually doing the camp rock stomp dance from the second movie
part of him wanted to ask you to drop a tutorial
the better part of him made him want to crawl in a hole and die
for the both of your sakes’, he blamed your behavior on the alcohol and spared you more embarrassment by turning away from you and looking for help
and his saving grace came in the form of his lord and savior, kang taehyun
mans was a lil busy with a few of the drunk and horny young adults himself
but what kai wants, kai gets!!
so when he called for his friend, taehyun came without a complaint
he also miraculously had a glass of water in hand, just in case kai got thirsty
“what’s wrong? do you need to go home?” taehyun worried, shoving the glass into his friend’s hand
kai was grateful for his friend
thank god he wasn’t too drunk to be helpful!!
kai merely shook his head at his friend’s questions, and started to drag him back to you
“there’s a girl who got roofied, and she’s doing the camp rock stomp dance—we have to help her!”
but when kai got to you, he found a mess
that mess being you and soobin squealing around while yeonjun was running away from another guy who looked drunk out of his mind and pissed as hell
how yeonjun and soobin got there? and who this other guy was?? and HOW the three of you managed to piss him off???
kai and taehyun had no clue
but they could tell things did not look good for yall
soobin was currently hiding behind a disoriented you, using your inebriated self as a shield
meanwhile yeonjun was narrowly avoiding haphazard punches thrown at him, practically dancing away from them
“what do i do?! what do i do?!?!” yeonjun screamed
“DRAG HIS ASS!” taehyun yelled, right before socking a random guy in front of him
“WHAT ARE YOU DOING?!” kai screamed, leaping away from the new, unprovoked beatdowns taehyun was causing
“fighting my demons!”
maybe taehyun was a little too drunk to be helpful :/
kai scrambled towards you and soobin, who had backed away from the initial fighting pair
“what the hell happened? i wasn’t even gone for two minutes!!”
“i found y/n right after you left, who had saved yeonjun from the mosh pit—”
“—mans was getting his shit blended in there—”
“we were about to come find you, when y/n grabbed some random guy’s ass—”
“—to be fair, i thought he was kai—”
“and when the guy turned around to fight her, she blamed it on yeonjun!!”
“well, duh! i’m just a lil girl!!”
kai blanched at you, while you pouted up at him
you were all like 🥺 👉🏽👈🏽
you had such a sweet look on your face tbh, that kai and soobin almost cracked
before you turned around barfed into a potted plant
things literally could not get worse
“WORLDSTAR! WORLDSTAAAR!!”
it took the three of you a second to realize where that yelling had been coming from
but you finally found the source when you looked on stage and found beomgyu filming the fights going on
“fuck me, he’s here too?!” soobin whined
and while beomgyu had gotten your guys’ attention, he had also gotten a few others’ as well
“hey, you got your friend filming me? i’m here on scholarship!”
the big guy yelled, grabbing yeonjun to hold him still as he went to punch him again
“oh fuck,” yeonjun muttered
beomgyu fumbled around with his phone and guitar, going to brandish the instrument in one hand like a weapon to help out his friend
but luckily didn’t have to when a pot smashed against the attacker’s head, knocking him out cold
the partygoers watched as the big guy dropped to the floor, right in front of yeonjun
yeonjun looked in disbelief from his side of the fallen body
over to you on the other side, your hand still raised in the air from its defensive attack
“holy shit!” beomgyu gasped
“holy shit!” you gasped back
the party was silent for a second
before everyone erupted in cheers!! :D
and everyone stood up and clapped
“THAT WAS AWESOME!”
people around you were jumping around and back to partying again
meanwhile the rest of the group came back to you
“are you guys okay??” kai asked
“i think i just shit my pants,” yeonjun breathed, clutching onto his chest
he looked as white as a ghost, but he didn’t get any injuries
luckily, the guy was too drunk to properly do any damage to yeonjun
but he was still afraid at the possibility!!
you merely nodded at kai in acknowledgment, before leaning tiredly on the person nearest to you
which happened to be taehyun, as he kept you upright with his non-bloodied hand
and then there was beomgyu, who ran over to yall with his phone in the air
“oh my god, i got the whole thing on video!!”
“did i look cool?”
you asked him tiredly from your position
“kind of, you’ve got a bit of barf on your chin, but i could probably photoshop it out later!”
“let’s gooo!! :D”
the two of you fist bumped, before yeonjun turned to you
“thanks for knocking that guy out, y/n, you saved me”
“but she was the one who got you in that mess—”
“of course, yeonjun! what are friends for?!”
you unknowingly interrupted soobin, causing everyone in the group to clap at your selfless words
"come on, let's all get out of here and get some ramyeon--on me!" yeonjun pulled out his daddy's credit card
causing the rest of the group to cheer
soobin’s eye twitched at yall SO HARD
“are you fucking with me rn?? SHE’S the reason this all happened—?!”
but soobin was drowned out by your guys' cheers as you all headed for the door
"come on soobin, before that guy wakes up and tries to go for round two!"
kai shouted, dragging soobin along and stepping over the guy that was still passed out
"oh, what the hell," soobin gave in, internally praying for the strength to tolerate you and beomgyu for the rest of the night
"woah wait a sec," beomgyu said deliriously, looking at soobin like he just realized he was there
"soobie boobie? when the fuck did you get here?"
soobin, on cue, gave the heaviest eye roll known to man
"i've BEEN here, motherfucker!"
…..
…and the rest was history!!😅
after that, yall just kind of gravitated to each other until suddenly
your snapchat streaks were too high
you’d gone grocery shopping for each other’s favorite snacks
and your moms all knew abt each other and would constantly ask abt you
yall were in too deep and decided to just kind of stick together after that :)
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eclipsewxtch · 2 months ago
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NO SPOILERS BUT REACTIONS TO EPISODE 9 ARCANE S2 BUT IM LIVE TWEETING (TUMBLING):
• her hair is so fucking long like ik it was but jesus christ is it even possible for hair to get that long even when ur malnutrished n sorta kinda living in poverty? like don’t get me wrong silco was definitely well off compared to most zaunites but we have to be realistic that extra money wasn’t. that much. like it WAS to them but it wasn’t. i’m sure they had more basic necessities than most tho? maybe i can expand on that in the fic or something.
• she’s so pretty i missed her so bad
• he’s so sick of her shit😭 LMAO I LOVE THEM BADDD
• “always a dance w u” UR SO FREAKING CUTE UGH
• take a shot everytime a main character in arcane tries to kill themselves or others unsuccessfully.
• the intro eats every single time.
• i love lesbians. that’s unimportant but i do.
• why is this ominous music playing… what’s going on… OH WHAT THE FUCK OH WHAT THE FUCK OH MY GOD WHAT RHE FUCK
• why did they bring the fucking trypophobia nightmare fuel 😭 ew
• i hate this bitch so fucking much i hate her i hate her i hate her i hate her i HATE—
• HOLY SHIT NO NO
• AHAHAHAHAHA SHE DIED AHAHAHAHAHA
• “still a fox” bitch u raised her
• WOOOOO HI QUEEN HU MY GLORIOUS BEAUTY HEYY HEY HEY she is my pretty princess i fear.
• heyyyty😍 welcome back king i missed u
• okay so he has his ears pierced by there’s no gold earrings which makes sense but still. he EATS up the gold jewellery.
• i really want a jayce and vi team up they would accomplish absolutely nothing but it would be entertaining anyway
•okay so the trypophobia nightmare fuel is gone thank god but i fear its not over
• oh my gods he looks so cool??? so cool and so odd and unsettling and definitely a poster child for eugenics
• LMAO CAITLYN IM SO PROUD OF YOU THIS TEAMUP WAS A LITTLE UNEXPECTED BUT VERY NEEDED a direct opposite of vi/jayce n that’s funny
• me when for once all the characters are on the same page: 😍
why did it take us 18 episodes for y’all to get here like omfg??
• “people deserve to choose their own fates” god the fanfic material is never ending i am SCREAMING
• mel is so badass AND i just won my arcane bingo card
• ignoring ekko lowkey crazy like damn???
• okay this season has been a trypophobia nightmare so unfortunately i will not be rewatching this season for nostalgia.
• SHE CALLED HIM DAD I AM NOT WELL AT ALL I MISS THEM I MISS THEM I MISS—
• ekko disappearing is so.
•. JAYCE U R SO LOVED. THEY COULD NEVER MAKE ME HATE U KING!
• okay SERIOUSLY trypophobia nightmare; i am so so glad i stopped smoking bc i would have tweaked.
• “you were never broken… there is beauty in imperfections.” STOP IT STOP IT STOP IT DOOMED GAYS ARE SO SAD STOP JT
• lol my glorious king ekko!!!!
• god i hate the trypophobia nightmare fuel. it IS the worst. like so bad. so so bad. anyway thank u ekko
• MAKE THEM CANON LEAGUE OF LEGENDS DONT BE A PUSSY
• oh they’re so precious aw. i need them happy in my fanfic. it’s the only way to find peace.
• okay this score is beautiful
•this is beautiful. when this show isn’t giving me nightmare fuel it is beautiful.
• HOLY AHIT I THOUGHT SHE BROKE HER NECK FUCK OKAY THAT WAS SCARY
• okay everything is fine there’s ten minutes left what could happen?
• Alright😐 okay thank you for that immediate karmic retribution you heartless assholes.
• no see i use the death is like falling asleep line in every single one of my fics so this is ESPECIALLY sick and twisted, actually. this song is bullshit.
• WOOO ONE OF MY ALL TIME FAV CHARACTERS HELL YES!!!
• “our story isn’t over” well obviously this is a prequel to the games i didn’t rlly think it was over.
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tomdutch · 3 years ago
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So you watch pll? Girl you are a queen. If you would be an actress who would you love to play? Who would you like to date and who is your favorite couple?🧐
i doooo it’s one of my comfort shows even tho it’s so crazy 😭 i’m actually reading the books rn, i’m almost done with the second one and girl. these 17 year olds are not ok in the head 😭
hm if i have to play one of the 5 main girlies then i’d prolly want alison but only until the doll house episodes. after that the writers completely destroy her character, she turns into a whiny damsel in distress who falls for obviously shady ppl’s antics (rollins. death) when she could’ve spun 80 tales around them before season 6 without lifting a finger. like i know they wanted to give her a redemption arc but 1) i’m not here for that! some villains are too iconic and shouldn’t be heroes. at best she could’ve been an antihero but not one of the main girlies and 2) it was ass! do better marlene king
but if i could play anyone else in the cast i’d go for mona or jenna they ate these girls UPPPPP they’re my fave characters
pll stans might get mad at me for this but i wouldn’t date any of the menses on that show.... like maybe caleb but he doesn’t rlly have much of a personality outside of *mona as a voice* being a techno boy toy. toby’s boring and a cop, ezra’s a felon and i want him to die, mike is irrelevant, noel kahn is sexy but evil for no real reason like why did he do any of what he did. jason is also sexy but he also has no personality at all like name one character trait for him... blond? shirtless a lot? hates his family? lmaooo
my fave couple is hanna and caleb! i think they heave the healthiest dynamic (looking away from season 6 and 7 post-time jump i don’t acknowledge that shit) and i enjoy the way they balance each other out. i also think ashley bensen and the dude who plays caleb have great chemistry together like no shade but you could tell by the end of the show lucy hale was sick of kissing ezra’s ventriloquist dummy looking ass
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