#he knows an intellectual when he sees one ofc he'd respect him

[tavwrote]

one day i'll have my essay written out about how alhaitham's story quest doubles as a peek into dottore's mind and it'll be wild but today is not that day i don't think

[calamity-bean]

(warning, multiple asks) ok but on haxby (and this is probably mostly headcanon, but the show did give me this inclination) -- he spent his whole life in service to lady caroline... he'd probably grown up as her friend while children and then as her servant when he got old enough and i imagine was always in love with her. and ofc she married someone else -- he is only a servant after all. so he watches the woman he loves marry someone else. then bc he is the most senior staff

he was sent to go serve the london home with the new “man of the house” who not only married the woman he probably loved, but is also a complete piece of shit, is stupider than a wooden block, and has a propensity (and eventually complete obsession) with taking whores even when he has a perfectly nice wife that haxby probably idolizes. and through this haxby has to wait on him and serve him and basically be his slave. and THEN he has to wait on the prostitute that howard has brought home. and he

has to serve her. and simultaneously, has to not only watch, but actively facilitate the loss of all of the family’s money, all of it being spent on whores for howard… i think his hatred of charlotte stems from here. she is the replacement for caroline in howard’s world. so haxby hates her and basically everything she represents. plus he is hyper!aware of how she is playing howard and then choosing herself over caroline when caroline comes to ask for her support. but on the other hand, he knows

he knows they both are serving howard even though they both hate him, but they also both rely on the livelihoods from it. plus he is attracted to her (like everyone is) and has to see her have sex with haxby basically all the time. he knows that she /knows/ he is intellectually her equal when howard can’t even get a seat at the table, and so when she so easily bates him, he is even more angry at her. and set out to destroy her. idk where i am going with this — these are just my thoughts about it

also side note but the hand-holding of charlotte/haxby while having sex in the foyer was like… so intimate?? they were having pretty violent sex, but the way they held hands seemed overly gentle and bonding and purposeful and all those things that completely contradicted what they both probably pretended was happening in that scene

…I think I love you, mysterious friend.

I will say that, although I’ve certainly seen speculation that Haxby might actually be Lady Caroline’s servant, and although I find the idea of childhood friendship and lifelong pining you put forth here delightful, I think canon and materials supplemental to canon do actually point to him being in service to the Howards. After all, the fortune may be Lady Caroline’s, but the estate is Howard’s, and it is the estate that Howard says in 1.03 that Haxby’s family has been with for generations. He furthermore professes his loyalty to House Howard specifically in 1.06, and his bio in the press pack seems to support that.

WITH THAT SAID, HOWEVER. I adore your headcanoning, and I am totally on board with you that:

Regardless of how long he’s known Lady Caroline, he has great respect for her and also possibly a wee crush.

Everything about having to not only endure but also facilitate Howard’s infidelity and stupidity, Charlotte’s excessive spending, the way she plays Howard and disrespects Lady Caroline … Charlotte poses a legitimate threat to the financial security of the estate and just, in general, makes Haxby’s job difficult on a day to day basis (not to mention that she’s kinda rude about it). And while his general disdain for sex workers is a factor, those things are the root of his resentment toward her.

Yet, as you said, he also has pants feelings for Charlotte, and since his office is literally ACROSS THE HALL from Howard’s bedroom he CANNOT ESCAPE THE NOISES, and he also at least sometimes recognizes that he and Charlotte have common ground, and that is VERY INCONVENIENT TO LOATHING HER.

The hand-holding. One of several jarringly tender / intimate touches amid what was, overall, fairly rough sex. The kiss, which is long and deep. The long moments before the kiss, when Charlotte keeps glancing between his eyes and his mouth as they slowly bring their faces closer and closer together. How that entire scene is filmed so close and quiet and in those warm, candlelit tones, and how they catch their breath afterward, all uncomfortable and triumphant and confused and regretful all at once.

You’ve also hit on one of the things that I find so delightful about their little war in the first half of the season: that it’s a war of equals. Not only because they are both, each in their own way, at the service of Howard’s whims, but because they’re both far cleverer than he is and constantly have to pretend that they’re not. They’re well-matched in wits, in insults, and in petty scheming alike, and that really is what makes it fun — otherwise, if one or the other were seriously outmatched, it would just feel like bullying, and that wouldn’t be amusing or interesting at all. Indeed, the few times one of them does really cross the line (such as Haxby insulting Charlotte’s dying friend, or the pisspot stunt), the one who should be feeling victorious ends up looking profoundly uncomfortable in the face of the other’s vulnerability.

Anyway, though. Your messages honestly made my night? Thank you so much for sharing, and feel free to headcanon at me anytime.