#he does the same thing with smoking cigarettes thanks to Sheila the betrayer | Explore Tumblr posts and blogs

prlssprfctn · 5 days ago

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Jason, who grips a crowbar in his hand as tight as he can, as if his life depends on it — because once it did. Jason, who frowns at every sound of the crowbar hitting an enemy because all he can hear is his own screams, his own bones cracking. Jason, who drags the crowbar against the concrete floor, taunting whoever he fights, but all he can hear is "A or B?" in the back of his mind. Jason, who cleans up the crowbar from blood later that day, his fingertips trembling a little at that, but thinking:

See? I am not weak, I had survived, and no one could break me again — not like this, anyway. I am strong, and I am safe, I am more than my death, do you see that‐

Expect others just glance at him questioningly, thinking if anything, it is slightly disturbing. Expect when Jason returns home, he is not that sure of being all strong anymore because... fear? It never left.

jason using crowbars as a weapon but not in an edgy bad boy way...

more like... in a super fucked up, self imposed exposure therapy kind of way

#he does the same thing with smoking cigarettes thanks to Sheila the betrayer #> prev tags #when he smokes he chokes on the first breath because the feeling of smoke in his lungs sends him to panic #dissociating with a cigarette in his hands becoming a tiny boy who was dying in the warehouse hugging the bomb is easy like that #remembering Sheila even easier #he tries to pretend that he is not a scared kid but her — tall unbotheted to the sounds of child screaming #because child is STILL screaming just in the back of his mind #and if he wants to fight with him (with his own ghost) then he needs to pretend to be someone who isn't #jason todd #red hood #dcu comics #batfam

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