#he curses like a sailor
Explore tagged Tumblr posts
Text
136 notes
·
View notes
Text
Chuuya thinks he's the king of cursing until he witnesses Kunikida utter sets of words directed at Dazai that should be banned in every country under the sun
#do they have gordon ramsey in bsd#i would love to see gordon vs kunikida showdown#kunikida curses like a sailor but with enriched vocabulary#which somehow makes it worse#chuuya: damn dazai ur new partner got crazy talent in cursing frfr#dazai: ik#chuuya: can he teach me? I'll pay#dazai: ???#bsd#bsd kunikida#bsd chuuya
464 notes
·
View notes
Note
The tumblr q&a is over, but I was curious! I love all the different phrases the characters in isat/sasasa:p use--If it's something you can say, where did inspiration for "gems alive" and other phrases come from?
THANK YOU FOR ASKING BECAUSE I GET TO TALK ABOUT WORLDBUILDING AND SWEAR WORDS AND BRANDON SANDERSON
long post ahead
ok so when I was figuring out the world, I found this lecture on worldbuilding by Brandon Sanderson (go watch it, and also go read his books), and (im gonna paraphrase heavily here) one thing he mentioned is that, to make a memorable world, one thing you can do is pick a couple areas of culture, and go real deep with it. So like, pick fashion, and architecture, and interior design, and develop those a bunch, and bam! you convinced people you have a whole dang world, even though you only developed 3 areas of this world. hollow iceberg everyone thinks is a real iceberg.
he also mentioned the idea of like... getting weird with it? and develop based on a weird detail? for example, in his book The Stormlight Archives, one detail is that women have to hide their left hand at all times. ok, so what does that mean, whats taboo about a left hand? is the left hand shameful, or lewd somehow, the same way ankles were for us? what about fashion, what does women's fashion look like? and how do you live your every day life, knowing you can't show this hand, can you carry things the same way? etc
SO, for me, one of the Big Worldbuilding pillars i picked was, uh, swear words lol. or language and common expressions, more generally. i went on a whole journey where i was like... ok swear words in a LOT of languages (including french and english, both languages i speak fluently) are either sexual, or about gross bodily discharges. you know what words i mean!!!!!
and, well, i also didnt want the game to be full of those words, mostly because i think its a tightrope to use those words without seeming cringe, and also because i have a Core Memory of showing a comic to a colleague and she said "well i wouldve liked to show it to my kids, but you said fuck 12 times in there" and i didnt show my face to her for a week. family friendly family friendly family friendly
so what swear words should my characters use, that arent the same ones we use? and could those swear words actually tell us something about the world they live in? could i actually use those swear words... to show the characters come from different cultures???
and what COULD swear words be like, if theyre not about sex or body stuff? well irl they're usually about religions or belief. "oh god", "goddamnit", etc. as a sidenote, stuff like "oh my god" or "geez" arent used, because jesus christ is not canon to the ISAT universe. alright
i decided very early on i wouldnt have those in the game either, but i COULD have them be about the religions specific to this world. and for insults, i could have them be about stuff those beliefs would see as lesser.
anyway instead of talking about "gems alive" lets talk about "crab"
isabeau+mirabelle+bonnie use "crab" as a swear word because they follow a religion all around change, bettering yourself, evolving, and, the crab meme,
for those who dont get the joke, its about carcinisation, and about how a bunch of non-crab-like forms somehow evolved to a crab-like form. which would be horrible, for a religion all based around change!!! you mean we change and evolve, but theres a chance we might all become crabs??? CRAB!!!!!!!
anyway having "crab" kinda reads as 1. swear word 2. thats funny and weird (sets the tone) 3. tells you they know what crabs are (world not that different from ours, AND means they live close-ish to the coast, aka not land locked) and 4. crabs are somehow hated/feared, even if as the player you dont get why, it shows this country has its own culture (even if you dont get the crabs joke, which uuuh apparently doesnt work as well in countries that dont have this specific meme. WHATEVER!!!!)
(a few people came to me saying "heh, i get it, because crab and crap are very similar words" and um actually i did not think about that. crab is just a funny word on its own, and also i am a comedy genius without even trying)
anyway tldr: swear words as a worldbuilding tool. soon in theaters
#in stars and time#start again start again start again#'adrienne isabeau says 'oh geez' 1 time in the prologue'#quite honestly this is a mistake and im retconning it. he said 'oh change' instead. will fix whenever i get around to making a new build#reference#also yeah canonically bonnie swears all the time#everyone has just given up and lets them curse like a sailor. bonnie has won#i added a cut but actually no you WILL read this whole post#long post
532 notes
·
View notes
Text
it’s so funny to me that if I asked someone from my family (pretending they knew the mha characters) who I was in mha they’d probably say jiro or todoroki but if you asked my friends they’d probably say bakugo
#Bakugo is the correct answer#Granted this depends on the friend#Id assume and hope that this is what Robbie and millo would say#One time in seventh I did ask someone this#He said I was the bakugo of our pe trio#He was Mina and auggie was denki#This is because while I have gotten better abt it I have been known to smack people upside the head for saying dumb shit#I also curse like a god damn sailor#Blame my mom#bakugo katsuki#bakugou katsuki#mha bakugou#bnha bakugou#katsuki bakugo#katsuki bakugou#dynamight#mha#my hero academia#bhna#boku no hero academia#jirou kyouka#shoto todoroki
22 notes
·
View notes
Text
Just 3 princesses
#adam is like “oh no :(” when he lose while kenny is here cursing like sailor#riho casually winning#dream team fr 🥺 cutness overload#kenny omega#riho#adam cole
50 notes
·
View notes
Text
You think Li Lianhua would turn and punch Di Feisheng when they first hear their XiaoBao curse and Di Feisheng giggles.
Only for Di Feisheng to look so offended because he has literally never cursed before and it's usually Li Lianhua badmouthing Li Xiangyi.
Like this is actually your fault babe! How dare you hit me about it. *Folds arms and pouts subtly*
#Fang Duobing can curse but doesn't unless he's pushed into a corner#Li Lianhua actually curses like a sailor but only when he's talking about Li Xiangyi#Di Feisheng really never curses other than calling people out for being weakass bitches#and even then he just glares and people understand that#the most di Feisheng curses is calling some stupid or weak#di feisheng#fang duobing#li lianhua#difanghua#dihua#mysterious lotus casebook
29 notes
·
View notes
Text
I'll bet my left sock, Lucius Malfoy was a very polite young man, until he met a smol greasy haired child who cursed more times in five minutes than he did in this entire life.
#lucius malfoy#severus snape#this was the moment lu-lu said yes i will help you small child#malfoy leaned to curse#even though eileen snape raised a well mannered well spoken child#tobais swore like a sailor and drank like one too#just the facts#i bet you he didnt even know half of what they meant#but it made people interested#so it was worth it#harry potter#harry potter fandom#pro snape
350 notes
·
View notes
Text
let nico di angelo say fuck
#solangelo#nico di angelo#tsats#the moment he says dam it i was like#he said the thing!!!#but i was also like. this kid would have such a sailors mouth if it wasn’t for the books being written for kids#and!! i don’t actually think he should curse obv bc the books are for kids#but it’s funny
122 notes
·
View notes
Text
Ripred raises Gregor-
gregor: uh what’s for dinner ripred: well we have raw fish and… ripred: ripred: hey don’t kids like the whole sushi thing? gregor: i miss mrs. cormaci
——————
ripred: and for a bed i’d like to introduce you to this lovely thing called a nest!! gregor: …better than a box i guess
——————
gregor: can i fight yet ripred: you’re a child gregor: ares is a slightly larger child ripred: …fair point, no extreme violence and minimum 4 puns per battle
——————
ripred: when a mommy rat and daddy rat love each other very much— gregor: i am not doing this with you ratfuck i know what sex is ripred: wait no pup i have a powerpoint presentation. it’s color coded and everything! gregor: i wish i’d just stayed poor
——————
ripred: okay that’s enough, you know what, get on top of the fridge gregor, hissing as he climbs onto the fridge: this house is a fucking nightmare
——————
Ripred teaching gregor to fight and rager stuff 😭
——————
ripred: listen my support group says- gregor: you joined a support group for single moms ratfuck, that doesn’t count ripred: it does too, they all think i’m very brave for doing this alone gregor: for fucks sake-
——————
ripred, coming home late from something and seeing the lights on: uhh hello? gregor, sitting on a stool: and just where have you been all night young man? ripred: IM LIKE FIVE TIMES YOUR AGE
——————
Gregor, looking dow at the merry little band of rats, pointing: so who do we like, and who do i hate on principle ripred: Ripred: *choked up* im so proud
——————
ripred, who pulled an all-nighter working on peace: good morning! gregor, who was reading some romance and didn’t notice the sun came up: right…morning ripred: gregor: ripred: you didn’t sleep did you gregor: well clearly neither did you ripred: fair enough, overland coffee run?
——————
gregor: so this guy in Regalia was shovin’ me around and- ripred: i’ll kill him gregor: …no. ripred: but- gregor: his bond is in charge of the aerial teams and i can’t afford to fall out of Shalais good graces. for ares.
——————
ripred: look it’s not my fault i’m so charismatic gregor: i’m not asking for a lot here ripred: you’re asking me to suppress my nature gregor: i’m asking you to stop flirting with all my teachers at parent teacher conferences ripred: c’mon it’s not that big of a deal gregor: …miss shields gave me her phone number to pass along the other day. so did mr. burnes, it’s getting outta hand red ripred: oh i see, this is serious ripred: she’s really cute, maybe i should- gregor: STOP IT
#and yes being raised by ripred makes gregor curse more on principle#i fully believe that around boots and stuff gregor is the sweetest boy#but with ripred? and ares?#ma boi swears like a sailor#he deals in profanity like a sculptor deals in clay#gregor the overlander#the underland chronicles#tuc#rat dad#rage daddy#ripred the rat#ripred and gregor
16 notes
·
View notes
Text
do u guys think Kaeya says fuck? i am genuinely curious
#like sometimes i cant imagine him saying fuck#but also a part of me believes hes so sexy when he curses??#like when hes drunk#letting loose or just angry#he starts cursing like a sailor#but its kind of amusing because his voice makes it impossible for him to sound brash ???#are we on the same page on this i need to know#bellehalla talks
9 notes
·
View notes
Text
Back on my bullshit (im so convinced that abed knows he’s in a show)
Why don’t any of the characters swear when it would be so much more realistic if they did? It’s because Abed censors them. They all just assume it’s because he doesn’t like swearing but it’s actually bc he knows that a camera is somewhere and their audience will be expanded if they don’t curse
#abed community#abed nadir#if youre seeing this post out of context the backstory is that i fully believe abed knows he’s on a show#but the fourth wall is translucent not transparent#he can mostly tell when a camera will be there but it’s not a guaranteed bet every single time#im using this theory to explain things about the show to myself#like you’re telling me jeff winger isnt saying some variation of ‘fuck’ every other line?? no#that britta perry isn’t saying swearing like a sailor whenever she can as an act of rebellion because ‘they’re just words’#that annie edison has never told anyone to go fuck themselves#i dont believe that they wouldnt swear#unless their good friend abed was like ‘hey guys can you maybe stop swearing so much’#and they’re like oh no we’re so sorry to have made you uncomfortable#meanwhile he’s sitting there like ‘this is going to increase viewership so fucking much’#that’s why some of their misadventures don’t make the cut. the episode where they flashed back to the wild west scene#with some guy shooting at them? they were all cursing at the top of their lungs as they ran away from bullets#the camping trip that they allude to? jeff was saying ‘fuck camping’ any time anyone would listen#i feel like troy knows that abed doesn’t actually mind swearing bc they probably both swear when it’s just them#plus he never says anything when anyone swears in the movies they watch together#but he just goes along with whatever the vibe is at the time#anyways that’s the tedtalk
6 notes
·
View notes
Text
free my girl she technically did that shit but i know her better than her shitty male author and i know that she would NEVER
#.txt#sorry im still on my pissed about how hazel was characterized post son 😭#literally we meet her. she's cursing like a sailor and only restraining herself from throttling octavian because he has blackmail material#and then suddenly she gets faint when she hears someone say GOSH DARN????????
6 notes
·
View notes
Text
i had a vision. (also ik he doesnt have eyes i wanted to be funny *scampers*)
#filmy has my sailors mouth sorry#hey at least he doesnt curse in front of the kids#today been a good day#ALSO...JSYK I AINT ABANDONING MERCURY OR ANYTHING LIKE THAT!#i just have no idea on what to draw and when u draw a certain character over 60 smth times in a span of a few months without drawing-#-something else it DOESSSS sorta tiring to draw yk?#anyways uuhhh#filmy the owl#the conductor ahit#fun fact i had to search up how to write a scottish accent.#ill probably keep doing that for a bit. bc i cannot write accents lmao#ahit oc
9 notes
·
View notes
Text
X
#pete davidson#I'm crying at how he started his voicemail so normal#and then towards the end cursed that woman out like a sailor 😬#yikes!#real talk though people should do their research before trying to put people on blast
23 notes
·
View notes
Text
I just fucking love it when someone has dogs that are too strong for them and one of them is dog aggressive and not wearing a muzzle. Just love it. And don't get angry when I need to physically kick your dog away after it bit both me and my dog, be happy my almost 40 kilo dog listened to me and did not bite back. Fucking hell.
#good morning!#I didn't even have my coffee yet#Roef is too riled up for me to check him properly for bites#he looks tough but he's easily scared and he's pretty shaken#even after we walked off the tension somewhat by walking for an extra 30 minutes#there was some blood on my hand when I felt his leg but I can't see anything#will check again when he's calmed down#haven't seen any more blood so I think it's not that bad luckily#I have a bruise on my leg and a little superficial hole so it's not that bad#that dog wasn't there to make friends#I'm ashamed to say I kind of lost it#I yelled like a fishwife and cursed like a sailor#pretty sure everyone in my street is awake now#I do feel bad about kicking a dog though but I think the kick was nicer than having Roef actually getting angry and biting#I don't think I really hurt the dog that bad and he did back off long enough for his owner to fetch him so it is what it is#I could have been kinder to the lady because I'm sure she didn't want this either but I was so fucking pissed and just went off#maybe I'll have a talk with her once things have cooled down she only lives a block away so I know where to find her#liedeke talks#dogs#animals#roef#my pets#my dogs
6 notes
·
View notes
Text
A Crack Ship Snippet
M'Baku × Everett × Namor
I have no idea how I feel about this cardboard ship I built, lol. I tend to be on the ship, and sometimes, I get off. Anyways. Like always. The discord boosted my head up, and I did it. 🫶🏾 Here's a picture of all of us. 🤣 nsfw-ish fanfic
It all started with a request to the bartender as Everett settled on the stool.
"Ah. Hey? Do you guys have any foreign liquors or-"
"Of course, the only white man in all of Wakanda would come up and ask for something foreign." The bartender scoffed.
"Well there's Bucky-"
"The White Wolf does not ask for something from abroad."
Ross opened his mouth for a moment before sighing. "I'm sorry. Do you have any suggestions or recommendations...?"
"You look like a fruity drink with an umbrella kind of guy."
"Ah-"
"Am I right?"
"Well- not fully. I do enjoy a Jameson on the rocks from time to time-"
"Oh manly. Such a manly man with his Irish whiskey." He scoffed.
"So you do have foreign liquor-?"
"You're in Wakanda! We are an advanced nation! Of course we have foreign liquor!" The man frowned. "But why would you come to Wakanda and order something you can get anywhere in the world instead of getting something you can only get here?"
"I- uh- I didn't think-"
"Oh, calm down, colonizer. I'll make you something nice." The bartender chuckled as he stopped polishing a shot glass and set it down in front of him. "Let's get some Wakandan vodka in you while I work on that, mm?"
"Sounds like a plan." He offered a small smile.
"Good." They poured him a shot. "This stuff right here is incredible. We call it the Heart of Wakanda."
Everett eyed the clear liquor. "Why?"
"It's made with the dead leaves of the heart-shaped herb."
"Is that safe for me to drink?"
"Yes. I'm not out here handing out mugs of absinthe." He chuckled. "Drink." He gestured to the glass.
Everett eyed the glass skeptically before picking it up and downing it.
It had a bitterness that rivaled cough syrup and black licorice, causing him to choke and nearly gag as it raced down his throat.
"Are you sure that isn't absinthe!?"
"I'm sure."
"That was awful." He groaned.
The bartender chuckled. "Don't worry. The next drink will be better."
"Ugh." He groaned as he wrinkled his nose in disgust. "Do you have any citrus slices? Preferably an orange?"
He was slid a tangerine and watched the bartender start working on his drink with a sigh.
This wasn't exactly what he had asked for, but it would do.
He grabbed the fruit up and began to pick at it, eager to cleanse his palette.
That is until a large hand smacked his back before sliding around to squeeze his shoulder.
"What are you doing over here by yourself, colonizer?"
Ross sighed when he recognized the Jabari king's voice moments after being hit with a wave of his cologne. "Hiding from you."
"Hiding from me?" He chuckled before pulling away to sit beside him. "You are one of the only two white men in Wakanda right now. You cannot hide from me without leaving the nation."
"Well, I'm a wanted man, so I can't leave."
"Then you cannot hide." He grinned.
"He could always come to Talokan."
They both turned to look at Namor, who had chosen to sit on the opposite side of the dazed American.
"You would let a colonizer into Talokan?"
"He is an ally. However, I would not hesitate to kill him if he caused any issues." He offered a warm smile to the Jabari king before looking down at Everett. "But you wouldn't give me a reason to need to kill you, right?"
Everett parted his lips in shock before refocusing on his tangerine. "No!" He frowned. "I have no idea why either of you are talking to me." He huffed as he began to pick at the fruit's skin. "I'm off the clock. There's no need to be near me."
"I can go wherever I wish. This is Wakanda." M'Baku nudged him. "If I wish to annoy you while you pout over a tangerine, I will."
"I am not pouting."
"Then why are you struggling to peel it?" Namor arched a brow as his eyes began to darken. "Do you have enslaved people to peel them for you?"
"Enslaved what-? No!" Everett panicked under the god king's gaze. "I'm just used to eating chopped fruit from the store. Where employees chop up the fruit and sell it or a business sells pre-chopped fruit... or processed fruit cups...and have you ever been to a grocery store?"
Namor shook his head slowly.
"I need to show you a picture of one or a video. They're really nice. I think you'd like it and-"
"-you're rambling."
His face burned in embarrassment. "Sorry."
The king turned his head before looking to the bartender. "Give me whatever you gave him." He pointed at the empty shot glass.
"Me too." M'Baku raised a hand as the bartender abandoned the cocktail shaker he was shaking.
Everett fumbled with the tangerine as the two men were served their shots of liquor.
M'Baku took it with ease and Namor took it with a low grunt.
Both were better than his suppressed retching and cries for citrus.
It was hard not to feel insecure when sitting between them.
They were attractive.
Big.
Strong.
Revered.
Wise.
And he was....
not.
The two big men watched him struggle in silence until he managed to break the skin of the fruit with his short, blunt nails. He peeled off the peel with skilled fingers before inspecting the naked fruit. He pulled a wedge from the veined sphere and popped it into his mouth before glancing up at the two kings.
They were both watching him intently.
He furrowed his eyebrows after swallowing. "Oh...uh...did you guys...want a slice?" He held another wedge up and glanced between them.
Namor grabbed his wrist and pulled it close before he ate it out of his hand.
Everett could only stare as the king chewed.
"What.... why did you do that...?"
Namor looked at him. "You offered it."
"To place it in your hand."
"It is not an offense to be fed. Is it?"
"Well no... but it's awkward."
M'Baku arched a brow. "You're just sharing food."
"Maybe I'm thinking too hard about it."
"Well feed me. I can make it awkward."
"No! Feed yourself."
"Come on. Don't tell me the little mouse is scared."
"I'm not scared."
"Then feed me."
"I will if you promise not to make it weird."
"Make it weird?"
"No moaning or anything strange."
"You have to earn my moans." M'Baku chuckled. "I do not moan for free."
"Good." Everett exhaled before grabbing another wedge and holding it out to the Jabari king. "Here."
He ate it out of his hand before inspecting his empty shot glass. "Mm. This really cuts the bitterness." He murmured.
"Yeah." Everett fed himself another wedge. "I originally wanted an orange, but a tangerine works pretty well." He fed Namor another before working on pulling another wedge free. "It's better than the cuties and halos I used to grab at the store."
"What are those?" Namor arched a brow as he watched Ross feed M'Baku another wedge.
"Genetically modified fruits. They have soft skin, so that it's easier to peel."
"Oh. Is that why you struggled?" He arched a brow before grabbing his hand to inspect his nails.
"Maybe."
"Your hands are very soft and scar-free." He furrowed his eyebrows as he trailed a thumb over his palm.
"Well, I'm not a warrior. I was a pilot before I became an agent." He shrugged. "We use guns. Not spears."
"Which is why you are weak and fragile."
"Well, if we had vibranium bullets. I think we'd give you a run for your money."
"And that is why I despise the surface world." Namor let go of his hand before asking the bartender for another shot.
"What? Because we don't use spears and fists?!"
"Because you are greedy and destructive."
"Says the man who wants to burn the surface world to ground-"
"-because you are greedy and destructive!"
"Well, riddle me this, what came first? The chicken or the egg!?" Ross frowned as he watched the bartender pour the king another shot.
"God."
"That wasn't an option!"
"But it is true."
Ross puffed his cheeks in frustration as the king downed the shot before taking his last tangerine wedge.
"You're difficult."
"And you're easy."
Ross rolled his eyes. "I don't know how you're drinking that stuff like it's water."
"I like it. It's different." He shrugged before looking at the glass. "I wonder how it's made."
"The Heart of Wakanda is made in the Temple of Bast." M'Baku offered.
"Really?"
"Yeah." M'Baku nodded. "It's made similarly to vodka, where you ferment a grain pulp. But, the dead leaves of the heart-shaped herb are incorporated during fermentation." He looked up to see Namor and Everett listening intently, slightly flustered by his own intellectual gushing. "My cousin oversees the process. That's why I know so much." He offered a small smile.
"Oni?" Everett tilted his head.
"Yeah." He smiled. "Production stopped after Killmonger burned all of our plants, and Oni was cast into exile. So, now that she is back and the plants are flourishing again, we have the Heart of Wakanda back."
"Literally and figuratively." Everett offered as he recalled just how important the vessel of Bast was to the people of Wakanda.
"Mhm." He nodded.
"Does each Tribe of Wakanda have their own special liquor?"
"Kind of." M'Baku smiled. "There are several liquors made here in Wakanda. We have plum wines, other fruit wines, and floral wines. Herbal vodkas." He wiggled his shot glass. "Creamy liquors, which come from the Jabari Lands. There's so much... I couldn't possibly list them all."
"Hm." Everett nodded before looking to the talokanil king. "What about Talokan?"
"We have a variety as well...some from our ancestors and newer ones we've had to cultivate in our new home." He offered a warm smile. "We have one made with fermented maize. One with kelp. And sweeter liquors made from cocoa, chilies, or fruit."
"Really?"
"Yes. We usually go for something thick with heat so that it keeps you warm. Talokan is cold because it is so far below." His eyes seemed to sparkle as he spoke of his kingdom. "But we wash it down with something sweet and creamy so that your mouth isn't burning from the chilies."
"Sounds good."
"I'll have to bring some liquor back next time. It is quite delicious."
"I'll have to bring something from the mountains as well."
Everett nodded before smiling as the bartender slid him three drinks.
"Alright." The man leaned against the counter. "I figured I'd treat you to a little drink tour, since no one's really given you a taste of Wakanda in terms of liquor." He pointed a finger at the first drink. "Here's a plum margarita. They're made with Wakandan grown plums that are gathered by the Temple of Bast. It's sweet, fruity, floral, and refreshing." He hummed before circling a finger over it. "Rimmed with salt and garnished with thyme." He moved his hovering finger over the second drink. "This drink is called the Melon Trifecta. It's named after a popular icee flavor sold here in Wakanda. It features three different melons by layering liquor-based slushies. I think you'll like it. It kinda looks like a rainbow sorbet. But three different melons." He huffed before pointing at the last drink. "This last one is called the First Sunrise of Wakanda. Basically centering around the first sunrise after Bashenga united Wakanda. It's got the Heart of Wakanda in it diluted with fruity syrups of different densities. Creating the perfect ombre." He clapped his hands together. "Enjoy."
"Thanks!" Everett smiled before looking at his drinks with glee. He grabbed the first drink, took a sip, and grinned. "Wow. That's good." He slid it to M'Baku. "Try it."
He took a sip before nodding in approval as he slid it to Namor. "I told you, the plums are phenomenal."
Namor nodded in agreement as he took a sip. "The salt keeps it from being too sweet."
"Yeah." Everett grinned before grabbing the second drink and taking a sip. "Ok. This is the best thing I've ever had in my entire life."
"We need to take you to the icee place in the market area then." M'Baku snorted.
"It doesn't taste like fake fruit or candy. It literally tastes like melons." The American gushed as he took another sip.
"Welcome to Wakanda."
Namor pulled the glass away once he managed to suck half of the drink away through a straw, ignoring the small man's pout.
The king took a sip before nodding and offering it to M'Baku.
He shook his head. "I don't really like melons. They taste like sweet cucumbers."
Everett chuckled. "They don't taste like sweet cucumbers."
"Yes, they do, and that's why I don't eat melons."
"Well, you could try it."
"And still hate it."
"It tastes good to me." He hummed as he plucked his cup from Namor's hand and took a sip.
"Well, let's see if it's better with you." M'Baku grabbed his jaw and pushed his tongue into his mouth.
His tongue was cool and tasted strongly of plums. A tangy sweetness that cut through the sweet and refreshing melon liquor that floated in his mouth.
Before he could swallow, M'Baku robbed him of his drink before breaking the kiss with a soft hum.
Namor caught the cup as he dropped it and took another sip as Ross slowly came back to his senses and smacked at the chuckling king.
"Wha- hey! You drank my drink out of my mouth- and then you kissed me!" His voice went up three octaves as he finished the sentence.
"Maybe I do like melons." He ignored him.
"What!? Wait- really?" He smiled. "See. I told you it was good."
"Mhm."
Namor grabbed him by the jaw. "I want to try it too."
"Huh-"
"Sip."
"What? No. I'm not a shot glass."
Namor sighed and put down the glass before crushing their lips together.
Ross was stunned.
How drunk were they!?
And why wasn't anyone saying anything about them making out at the bar!?
Was this the norm!?
His train of thought was broken as the king's tongue slipped into his mouth.
His face burned as he kissed back shyly.
This wasn't supposed to happen, but he didn't hate it.
The king was even allowing him to pull him closer.
His breath hitched as M'Baku pulled him back by his hair, ending their kiss with a sting that made him moan.
"Look at you." He huffed. "You can't reward him so quickly, Fish man. He must work for it."
Namor scoffed. "Fine. Let's finish these drinks then."
The Jabari king released the silver-haired man. "Alright."
Everett was so red, it wasn't even funny.
But, if they wanted to play.
He could play.
Everett gently plucked the melon trifecta cup from Namor's hand again before finishing the drink. Namor shook his head before watching him grab the third drink.
"Perhaps you should slow down." He offered.
"While sitting with you two? No thanks."
"What's that supposed to mean?"
"I'm tired of feeling tense." Everett groaned as he lifted the drink. "I'm trying to get as loose as fucking possible."
"If you wanted to relax, all you had to do was ask." M'Baku chuckled as he sipped on his abandoned plum margarita. "I wouldn't mind helping."
"I literally came to the bar to get away, and the two of you hunted me down anyways." He frowned. "This is as close to a getaway as I'm going to get."
Namor laughed softly. "I think I enjoy your honesty when you're drunk."
"I'm not drunk. I'm just a little buzzed."
"What's the difference?"
He twirled a finger in the air. "Shit isn't spinning yet."
Namor hid his smile behind his hand. "Yet."
"I wonder if that'll be too strong for you." M'Baku tilted his head as he examined the third drink. "Most people can't endure more than one shot worth of the Heart of Wakanda."
"Aj K'uk'ulkan did."
"I know you did not just try to compare yourself to the fish man."
"They call it liquid courage for a reason." He smiled. "I can take anything. Maybe I'm super powerful, too."
The two kings watched him take two gulps of the sunrise drink before he had to put his head down in defeat.
That drink had definitely humbled him.
He hadn't really paid it much mind before, but the room was definitely getting hotter the more he drank, and his vision was slowly becoming altered.
Was the world spinning now?
He peeked up before squeezing his eyes shut.
Fuck.
It was.
The room was sweltering hot, and everything kinda had a pinkish purple aura that sparkled too.
Well.
He peeked up again.
Only M'Baku and Namor sparkled.
And why were they staring at him like that?
Were they drunk or buzzed?
Or did they want another kiss?
Fuck.
Why did they look so handsome?
Handsome?
His mind was spinning and fuzzy, almost as if Cupid had stabbed him in the back when he wasn't looking.
Maybe cupid had, because why else would he want to crawl into M'Baku's lap and beg him to see if melons tasted gross if it was in his mouth again?
What other reason could have him eager to snog Namor?
"Oh fuck." He groaned as he felt pants grow tight at the idea.
He needed to calm down.
Maybe get out?
Touch some grass?
Feel the cold air outside of this crowded place.
M'Baku would probably entertain the idea for a good laugh, but Namor would definitely kill him if they went further than drunk kissing.
At the end of the day, he was just an advisor to the Wakandan council who specialized in American politics and the ploys of the outside world.
There could never be anything.
Not even an experimental fling.
His eyes stung with tears at the thought.
This was beginning to feel frustrating.
He was touch starved and in dire need of relief.
But no one would ever give it here.
Shit, he could hardly get anything back in the States since his divorce.
"Damn it." He mumbled as a few tears fell down his face.
"Are you crying?" Namor blinked at the white man.
"No." Everett hid his face as the god king tried to catch a peek.
"So you're an emotional drunk?" M'Baku chuckled.
"No."
"Then why are you crying?"
"I doon't want to taaalk abouut it." He huffed.
"That acted faster on you than I thought it would." The Jabari king rubbed his back before finishing off the margarita. "Hang in there, little mouse."
"Fuck you. I'm perfectly fine."
"Don't be rude. You are sitting amongst kings." Namor yanked his head up by his hair. "Even if you're drunk, you should act respectfully."
The sting up his hair being pulled was delightful, pulling a soft moan from his lips before he smacked away his hand.
"Don't touch me."
"You moaned." He stated as he looked him over.
"Yeah. Well. Everything looks pink and sparkly, and I'm a little buzzed." Ross huffed. "So, it didn't mean anything. Just like those tipsy ass kisses."
"I told you." M'Baku chuckled. "You're a little mouse. You can't hold liquor well."
"I caaaaannnn." He huffed as he tried to fix his hair. "Wakandan liquor is strooong, but at least I'm nooot nauseous."
"Your face is all pink." Namor pointed out. "And your words are starting to slur. I wasn't aware you had such a filthy mouth."
"It's always beeeeeen filthy. I just keeeeeep it clean around you because you're scary and yoooou can't take a fucking joke."
M'Baku laughed. "He's not wrong."
"He's not wrong until I'm dragging his drunk ass out of here and putting his mouth to use."
"I'm just a little buzzed." He groaned as the god king grabbed his jaw and looked him over. "Stop saaaaying I'm drunk."
"What's my name, little mouse?"
"Aj K'-" Everett didn't get past the first K without his tongue struggling to form the rest of the sounds to complete it.
Fuck.
Why was the Heart of Wakanda so strong?
And why was K'uk'ulkan touching him again?
"Stop fucking touching me, damn it."
He smacked the king's touch away with a frown before shivering under his darkening gaze.
That shiver made Namor chuckle as he got up and downed the rest of his sunrise drink before licking his lips. "Let's take you out for some fresh air."
"Noooooo. I'm fine. Seeee?"
Everett got up, and Everett fell down with a hard thud.
M'Baku couldn't refrain from laughing as he got up and scooped the drunk man off the floor. "You are not fine."
"I'm fiiiiine. Put me down, you big beefy bitch."
"Oh, that mouth of yours is more fun than I realized." M'Baku smacked his ass as he began to carry the tipsy man out of the establishment with Namor not too far behind.
"It bites too."
Namor laughed. "Good."
And Scene!
So, that's kinda what I've been imagining. But it could definitely become more explicit... if I wrote more. What are y'all thinking?!? Is this deserving of more?!? or...? 👀
#namor x ross x m'baku#namor x everett x m'baku#m'baku#namor#everett ross#crack ship#what is shame?#tipsy#you big beefy bitch#he curses like sailor while drunk even though he's a pilot#oni daughter of zuri#black panther oc#the sun and the sky au#is this flirting or chaos
26 notes
·
View notes