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back-and-totheleft · 2 years ago

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Oliver Stone is late. It's been almost 40 minutes since we were supposed to meet on Zoom and I'm still waiting for him, afraid to step away in case he appears. Did he forget about our meeting? Did he change his mind and decided not to be interviewed? Or did I maybe send him the wrong link?

"I'm sorry," he apologizes immediately upon connecting, "I'm on vacation in Italy with my wife. Too much pasta, too much ice cream, too much everything. I completely forgot that we were scheduled to speak. I'm sorry you had to wait."

I don't tell him this but for the opportunity to interview one of the greatest filmmakers of the 20th century, I would be willing to wait much longer than 40 minutes.

Stone is, after all, the man who wrote "Scarface," who won his first Oscar for adapting "Midnight Express" to film, and two more for "Platoon" and "Born on the Fourth of July." He directed "JFK" and an array of provocative films such as "Salvador," "Wall Street," "Talk Radio," "Natural Born Killers," "The Doors," "Nixon," "U Turn," and others that have become an integral part of American cinema of the 80s and 90s.

I speak with Stone, who is turning 77 in September, ahead of his arrival at the Jerusalem Film Festival where he will be awarded a certificate of appreciation and present his new documentary, "Nuclear Now," which argues that nuclear energy is the solution to fight climate change.

"I'm very much looking forward to visiting Israel," Stone says, "I've visited it several times in the past, and I'm coming back because I'm curious. I received a very nice invitation from the festival. They wrote to me that they want to give me a lifetime achievement award. I don't see it as a political thing. It is given to me for the films I've made. It comes from a place of deeper critical and artistic appreciation of my work, and I'm happy to share it with the Israeli and Arab audiences, and with anyone who comes.

"I visited Israel 20 years ago. I came to film a documentary called 'Persona Non Grata', which dealt with the Israeli-Palestinian conflict. I interviewed Shimon Peres and [Prime Minister Benjamin] Netanyahu. It was crazy because during the conversation with Netanyahu, a bomb exploded further down the street and everything became very dramatic. I also interviewed [PLO leader Yasser] Arafat and the al-Aqsa [Martyrs'] Brigades. Then I almost got stuck in Ramallah. The Canadian ambassador managed to get us out of there at the very last minute, a second before a siege began. Lucky, because otherwise we would have been stuck there for a month."

Q: Your father was Jewish. Growing up, was Jewish culture present in your life?

"I was raised in between. My mother was Catholic, and my father was Jewish, but they decided as a compromise to raise me as a Protestant. They put me in Sunday school very early on. So no – I never had any knowledge of Judaism. My father was a tough man and he hated the Old Testament. Well, maybe 'hate' is a bit of a strong word, but he didn't find any use for it and thought it was bull***. In my opinion, it's actually a very exciting and historically interesting book. We studied it in Sunday school."

Q: Do you keep track of what's happening in Israel politically?

"I don't really know or understand what's going on there. It seems that Netanyahu is doing the best he can, but he has undoubtedly chosen some strange partners. Fundamentalist types, I would say. I can't say that I have respect for these people."

Q: As we speak, tens of thousands are protesting against the government. There's talk of a civil war. So perhaps you should bring your camera along.

"Oh no. Last time I almost got stuck in Ramallah. Don't tell me I might get stuck in Jerusalem this time. What are the protests about?

Q: About democracy.

"I see. Democracy is beautiful, beautiful and important."

"I'm coming to Israel because of my films"

The decision to invite Stone to the Jerusalem Film Festival garnered a lot of criticism in the media in recent weeks due to the director's several controversial statements throughout his career, such as statements viewed as antisemitic he made in 2010 while promoting his documentary miniseries "Oliver Stone's Untold History of the United States."

"I am not an antisemite," Stone clarifies firmly when I tell him that many in Israel still remember his remarks. "I was never an antisemite, and I don't think the things I said were antisemitic. I apologized for the things that were said, and various Jewish organizations in the US cleared me of any guilt."

Q: You said at the time that Hitler was misunderstood and that Jews control the media.

"It sounds really terrible when you say it like that, but it's out of context. If you watch the documentary series I made – 12 hours long – you can see exactly what I think and say about Hitler, Germany, and World War II.

"But most people haven't necessarily seen the series. Most people feed on headlines and soundbites. The series speaks for itself. It provides a very interesting and unorthodox view of WWII, among other things. So what else do you want me to say?

"I'm coming to Israel because of my films. I'm not coming to make a documentary about the ongoing political bull***, that's not my goal here. I'm an older man. I'd rather talk about other things, and not degrade my career by bringing up things I said In the past. I prefer to talk about nuclear energy."

And indeed, "Nuclear Now" is very different from what one would expect from Stone, both due to the subject and the direct and matter-of-fact tone used to convey the message.

According to Stone, he became interested in the subject after reading "A Bright Future" by Joshua S. Goldstein and Staffan A. Qvist. Stone originally thought to adapt the book to film, but eventually decided on a documentary approach.

"As I see it, the matter goes beyond parties, countries, and continents. Conservatives, liberals, Republicans, Democrats, Right, Left – this is relevant to everyone. There is a clear conclusion that nuclear energy works, and that it can be a solution to the climate crisis. Many years ago we foolishly turned our backs to something that works.

"We show in the film how nuclear energy was shunned. We deal with the reasons why people are afraid of it – Hiroshima and Nagasaki, the Chornobyl disaster; the horror films produced in the 1950s, with all the monsters created as a result of radioactive radiation: 'The China Syndrome' with Jane Fonda, 'Silkwood' with Meryl Streep, and of course the HBO series, 'Chernobyl', which shows an exaggeration of what happened.

"In movies, nuclear energy is never a good thing. From the beginning, people made the wrong connection between nuclear bombs and nuclear energy, but the two are so different. It's a glaring lack of understanding of the matter."

Q: How come?

"Because even if you don't believe in global warming, I would argue that nuclear energy is the cleanest and most effective type of energy we have. This is not to say that solar energy and wind energy are not effective, because they are. But they don't work all the time, and their hours of activity are limited. Nuclear energy works around the clock. You can't do that with the other energies. For example, in winter, when there is no sun or wind, the substitutes used today are methane or coal, and methane is one of the largest pollutants. It's a terrible solution. The oil companies love it, of course."

Q: And what made you make this movie specifically now?

"I'm older. I have children, and hopefully grandchildren soon. What will happen to them in 2050? The world is spending trillions of dollars on renewable energy, but according to the reports coming out in 2020, when we started working on the film, carbon dioxide levels are still rising. So we're not doing enough, it's not working. The change is not big enough. The world needs to shift its consciousness. Nuclear energy should be put back on the agenda, it should be encouraged.

"We were in Davos last February. All these important people, sitting there on the stage talking about the future of the world and blah-blah-blah. They never talk about nuclear energy. Why?"

Q: Do you think humanity is ready for such a shift in consciousness?

"Yes. Radioactive radiation is a fact and a part of life, and we should stop being afraid of it. There is radiation in dental clinics and is part of cancer treatments. It is all around us whether we like it or not, and we have to accept it. President Eisenhower praised nuclear energy. Kennedy also supported it. It was already on its way to happening. In the 1970s we aimed to make America a nuclear nation by the year 2000. But as we show in the film, the oil and coal companies lobbied against it. They tried to say that any amount of radiation is harmful to us, but that's not true, it's been proven. The film is about facts, not opinions or theories.

"I like to compare nuclear energy to Cinderella. She's the ugly sister who stays at home and cleans the floors, while her sisters go out and have a life. Then one day we all find out that Cinderella isn't ugly at all, she's actually beautiful. That's how I feel about nuclear energy. It's a misunderstood topic that got a bad reputation undeservedly."

Although he hasn't made a feature film since "Snowden" in 2016, Stone has been very busy in recent years. Besides "Nuclear Now", which premiered at the latest Venice Film Festival, two years ago he released "JFK Revisited: Through the Looking Glass," a documentary that brought him back to the conspiracy surrounding the assassination of Kennedy, 30 years after the monumental feature film he directed on the subject.

Stone also took advantage of downtime during the pandemic to write a fascinating memoir titled "Chasing the Light" about the struggles, disappointments, and successes that characterized the first decade of his film career.

"It was very easy and fun for me to go back in time to write the book," he says. "It gave me an opportunity to step aside for a moment and step outside of myself. It allowed me to examine my life as a philosopher. As a writer, you look at the things you've done in your life and examine yourself. You think about the meaning of your actions. This is the Socratic method – to look for the best way to live. That's what I try to do. I don't always succeed, but I try."

Q: Your book ends with you winning an Oscar for "Platoon," based on your experiences as a soldier in Vietnam. Are you planning to write the rest of your story?

"Yes. The book ends when I'm 40 because so many things happened to me until then. I would like to go back and tell the story until the end because it's a piece of a story. This book is about the dream, about the person who dreamed it, and about the first great fulfillment of the dream, that happened with the release of 'Platoon' and 'Salvador.'

"I wanted to show the reader that there is a lot more to this business than success. I wanted to write about the lessons I learned. To tell how each of these films was made and how difficult it was to make them. There was nothing more difficult than making these two films.

And of course, there are also all the scandals and stories surrounding the 'Midnight Express', 'Conan the Barbarian', 'Scarface' and 'Year of the Dragon', which I wrote for other directors. I saw so much along the way and felt like I had a lot of insights into life that I wanted to share. I tried to be as honest as Ron Kovic was in his book, on which I based the movie 'Born on the Fourth of July.'

Q: Almost all the films in your filmography were very difficult to make. There is no way they would be produced today.

"I agree with you that the atmosphere today is very different. My breakthrough happened when Reagan was in the White House, I was part of the reaction to it. But even so, during my career, there were more films that I wasn't allowed to make than films that I was allowed to. So maybe I became too dangerous at some point ".

Q: And yet, you have directed at least 20 cult films.

"I was very lucky, I guess. But these days it's so expensive to make movies and market them. That's why most movies have to be blockbusters, and those movies can really be very boring and repetitive. The Fast and Furious franchise, for instance. How many car crashes can we watch? Or the 'John Wick' movies. Keanu Reeves kills 400 people there, and you don't believe anything he does. It's so easy for him to kill people. It's ridiculous."

Q: I'm sorry, but how is that different from the movies of Sylvester Stallone and Arnold Schwarzenegger in the 80s?

"True, I guess you're right, but don't compare me to them. In ' Natural Born Killers' I made a satire. I had to say it over and over again because people didn't understand. The murders in the movie were ridiculous and intentionally extreme, like in a cartoon. The idea was that America was going crazy and that the media makes the violence sensational and a major news subject. I started to notice it with the OJ Simpson trial and all kinds of other cases that happened at the time. But I never made a movie with that kind of violence again."

Q: You've known many successes during your career, but also some painful failures. When you look back at the films you've made, are there any that you feel didn't get the fame they deserved?

"Many of them," Stone says, laughing. "I think 'Alexander' is one of my best films, but people weren't ready to accept it and it received very harsh reviews. In my opinion, undeservedly so. I released another version of it in 2007, which lasts three and a half hours. There were places where it was successful, mainly in Europe, so they didn't forget it. But in the English-speaking world, it was scorned and it wasn't fair in my opinion. It obviously hurt a lot.

"I really like 'Heaven & Earth', which I think is a beautiful film, but no one has seen it. I also really like 'Talk Radio' and 'U Turn' – a kinky and crazy film. I think 'Any Given Sunday' is a classic football film.

"The movie I made about the events of 9/11, 'World Trade Center,' didn't do well either. They said I was conservative, and all the attention was directed to 'Flight 93,' which presented a complete fantasy because nobody really knows what happened on that plane. But my film was authentic and showed the truth behind what happened. It was very difficult to make.

Professional and personal scandals accompanied Stone throughout his career and became one of his hallmarks early on. Over the years, he has also been accused of racism, misogyny, historical distortions, the glorification of serial killers, and a fondness for conspiracy theories, and the list of people he has clashed with in Hollywood is endless.

However, in recent years most of the criticism directed at him is related to his unusual affection for Russian President Vladimir Putin. In 2017, Stone directed a four-hour documentary series, which consisted of interviews with Putin, and the result was severely criticized due to the director's forgiving and flattering attitude toward the Russian leader.

"I hear a lot of criticism from overconfident people who say, 'Stone got old and went completely crazy. He used to make good movies, but at some point, he took a wrong turn.' All this sh**. That's what people want to believe about me. But it's too early to tell whether I'm on the right side of history or not. History is still in the making."

Q: A year and a half following the invasion of Ukraine, do you still believe Putin is a great leader as you said before? Or has your opinion changed?

"Putin is protecting the interests of his country. The conflict needs to be understood in a different way. If you don't recognize that the NATO alliance threatens Russia's territory, you ignore reality. He is in a difficult position because many Western countries are facing him. To tell the truth, I am surprised by the lack of understanding and the lack of empathy toward Russia. Very surprised even."

Q: You said in an interview once that you hated dictators and thugs. But in your political documentaries, such as the ones about Putin, Fidel Castro, and Hugo Chavez, you seem to be drawn to them. How do you explain the contradiction?

"There's something very important to understand in this context. The reason I went to talk to these people is because they all stood against the imperialist policy promoted by the US. I didn't go to them to interview them about what was going on in their backyard. What interested me was how they stood against this empire, against America. That's my perspective."

Q: I'm also very curious to hear about your prediction with regard to next year's presidential elections in the US.

"The upcoming election will be the craziest election we've ever had. I don't know what's going to happen. Biden has become very militant and is under the control of people who are worse and no less crazy than the fundamentalists in your government."

Subscribe to Israel Hayom's daily newsletter and never miss our top stories!

Q: Do you think there's a chance Trump will return to the White House?

"Yes. I don't support him and I never voted for him, but like Netanyahu, the fact that he is so attacked and hated only ensures that he will get more attention. Because a lot of people are really tired of the so-called mainstream media. Anyway, we have become a polarized and broken country and that's a real shame. The American Civil War was 150 years ago. What's happening now looks similar. I think the problems started in 2000 when George W. Bush was elected. I don't think he was elected legally. I had a feeling that evening that something strange was happening. Since then everything has been messed up."

Q: To sum up, would you ever make a film about Netanyahu?

"As you know, I have already interviewed him before. But no, I would not make a film about him. He does not fit my profile. He is very much in favor of the American empire. Trump played into his hands and gave him everything he wanted. It is Biden who stands in front of him and confronts him on vital issues. It makes me laugh to see how these things work sometimes. We live in a world that no longer has black or white. Only shades of gray remain."

-Yishai Kiczales, "Oliver Stone visits Israel – and speaks his mind," Israel Hayom, Jul 16 2023

#oliver stone #judaism #israel #nuclear now #jerusalem film festival #persona non grata #benjamin netanyahu

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zodiyack · 4 years ago

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Rude! (3,000+ Follower Fic Special 1/3)

Pairing: Billy Hargrove x Female!Hopper!Reader

Warnings: Swearing, Billy stuff, lyrics, fluff

Song: Rude by Magic!

Words: 1,798

Summary: Billy's love for Hopper's daughter is too strong to be stopped by the tough Chief Jim Hopper. Despite being told "not in a thousand years", he plans to love her regardless.

Note: Thank you so so much! I love you all, and writing your ideas, as well as sharing mine with you, has been so fucking fun and amazing! I'm sorry for my lack of words, I wish being an author came in handy with writing this, however, all I can say is that I love you all from the bottom of my heart. I've seen people do shout-outs, and ask-related stuff with their follower things, and I may do that, I'm not sure. For now, I hope you enjoy this... Thank you all, again!

Also 1/3 means that there will be two other fics released for the 3,000+ follower present!

Taglist: @urie-bowie-mercury, @matth1w, @redspaceace-writes, @fandom-puff, @darling-i-read-it, @simonsbluee, @sebastianstanslefteyebrow, @dpaccione

Masterlist | Stranger Things Masterlist

"Saturday morning, jumped out of bed and put on my best suit. Got in my car and raced like a jet all the way to you. Knocked on your door with my heart in my hands, to ask you a question, 'cause I know that you're an old-fashioned man. Yeah."

Billy was freshly graduated, working as a lifeguard whilst his girlfriend worked her own job, both saving up for their chance to ditch Hawkins and move to California. Sweet Cali. Billy was excited to show the love of his life around the place he called home. Though, physically, he left the salty ocean and windy beach behind, the place never truly left him.

You could see it in his eyes. The waves crashing in his blue orbs. He swore the scent had just barely clung to his belongings; the smell of the tangy air that followed a majority of the state. Working at a pool was the closest he got to the memory of California. Chlorine was most certainly not the salted ocean waters, but with the circumstances, he decided it'd do.

The way his face lit up whenever he talked about his home...it made Y/n more and more excited to see it. His girlfriend had grown up in Hawkins, stayed there her whole life. Never once did the Hoppers leave Hawkins.

But the second that was introduced to Billy, he knew it had to change.

Although they were saving for a big move, Billy had...other things in mind with what to do with his first large pay-check (or series, rather. Working as a lifeguard didn't pay well with just one check). He began to work more shifts to make up for the money he'd spent, and one day after calling in for a day off, he decided to put his plan into action.

"Billy, stop messing with the tie."

"It's annoying." Hands slapped away his attempts of adjusting the black silk tie.

"Well it won't stop being annoying if you keep fucking it up."

For the first time in a long time, Neil Hargrove was calm. Not happy, not amused, not pissed off for some unjust reason- just calm. He wasn't wreaking havoc and he wasn't being an asshole to his son. Billy hadn't seen this side of his dad in quite some time, in fact, he thought something important was going on and he was about to fuck it all up. And then, Susan retreated to the living room with a camera and a freshly ironed suit.

"You're not putting me in that."

"And who asked for your opinion?" Neil deflected with a raised brow. One heavy sigh later and Billy was leaving the bathroom, dawning the whole black and white getup.

Susan clasped her hands over her mouth, a tear leaving her eye, "You look so handsome! Just like your dad!"

Billy rolled his eyes, "Great."

However, his careless attitude was swept under the rug when the blue Camaro pulled up to the police station, interrupting a clearly distressed Chief Hopper bickering with his daughter. Billy had to get himself together before stepping out of the car, jaw slack after seeing the beauty he got to call his date.

"Hello Mr-"

"Don't even try play nice with me, Hargrove. She's not going anywhere with you. End of story." Hopper kept his eyes trained on the blond, body tense like a snake preparing to strike it's prey.

Y/n grabbed Billy's arm, slowly directing him to the car, "And in the sequel, we find out I am going with Billy. End of that story."

"There is no 'sequel.' The writer got drunk and lazy." She paused, turning to face her father who stood tall, arms crossed and face unamused.

"So his daughter picked up where her father left off, and then the sequel was published and the two lived happily ever after, the end."

While her dad attempted to search for a line that would better hers and force her to stay, she pushed Billy toward the driver's side and slid into the car as fast as she could, rolling down the window as Billy started it up. "Bye! I'll be back before midnight!"

The two drove off toward the school, leaving behind a trail of dust and very, very, pissed off Hopper.

Prom was better than Billy thought it would be. He didn't want to go at first, but after Max found out and spoke to her mom about it (the little redhead a cupid-in-the-making), Neil pushed him to go (as he was "doing something else besides being a lazy-no-good rebel"). It was then that he called Y/n and asked if she'd be going.

The suit came in handy. Clashing with his rocker aesthetic, he put it back on once more. The once-annoying tie proved to be somewhat okay in the end.

Can I have your daughter for the rest of my life? Say yes, say yes, 'cause I need to know. You say I'll never get your blessing "till the day I die, tough luck my friend, but the answer is no!"

Why you gotta be so rude? Don't you know I'm human too? Why you gotta be so rude? I'm gonna marry her anyway. Marry that girl, marry her anyway! Marry that girl, yeah, no matter what you say! Marry that girl, and we'll be a family! Why you gotta be so rude?

With a deep breath, he ran-over the conversation in his head once more. Like a script for an actor, he had thought of every possible outcome and every possible line for him to face it with. He almost chickened out as his fist rose to the door, but it was too late, for his knuckles rapped against it before he realized he was even knocking.

El opened the door, eyes wide when she saw the familiar mullet and button-down. "Papa..." She muttered as she backed away and out of view.

Hopper traded places with her, his lazy expression sobering up instantaneously, replaced with a grumpy scowl. "Hargrove."

"Mr. Hopper, sir."

"What are you doing on my front porch?"

He swallowed roughly, palms sweaty against his sides. "I was wondering if I could talk to you."

"You seem to be doing just that right now, Hargrove." Hop crossed his arms and clenched his jaw.

Well, this was certainly not something Billy had thought of. He was on panic mode internally, attempting to find any response that could save his hide and accomplish what he set out to do. Unfortunately, the word-vomit button seemed to be misplaced under the button labeled "help".

"I'd like to marry your daughter, sir."

Hop's eyes grew just as big in size as El's had when she opened the door. He choked on his own surprise, coughing it off, then glaring at the boy in front of him. "Over my dead body, Hargrove. If that's all, I'd strongly advise you to get off of my fucking porch while you're still alive."

I hate to do this, you leave no choice; can't live without her. Love me or hate me, we will be boys- standing at that alter. And we will fly away, to another galaxy, you know. You know she's in love with me, she will go anywhere I go-

"Billy, he's just stubborn."

"No, no, I don't think he likes me."

Y/n sighed, rubbing her boyfriend's back. He hadn't told her of his proposal plans, only that Hop seemed to have it out for him. "It'll take time, but he'll warm up to you!"

"It's been how many years since he's met me?"

"To be fair, your reputation wasn't doing you any good until now..."

"It's not like that was fucking obvious." He slouched further down in the front seat of his Camaro. To Billy, all hope was lost. If he couldn't get Hopper to give him his blessing, he was sure he'd lose his goddamned mind.

Y/n frowned. Her frown flipped around as an idea popped into her head, her lips finding Billy's knuckles and quirking his attention. "Even if he never likes you, I'm not going anywhere."

Billy laughed softly, "he'll fucking kill me if you go against him."

"Eh, that's only if he can catch us."

"You're out of your fucking mind, Y/n Hopper."

"I know."

The rest of the night was spent in the Camaro, of course, doing one of Billy's favorite pastimes. By the time the sun rose, Billy was sneaking a kiss to a giggling Y/n before dropping from her window in the cabin and running to his car, parked far enough that Hop or El wouldn't notice. He blew her one more kiss, which she pretended to catch, then he broke into a sprint.

Maybe, he thought, just maybe; there was still a chance.

His knuckles hit the door again, shifting on his feet nervously. It swung open to reveal Hopper, an unimpressed look bringing no surprise Billy's way. It was quite expected, honestly.

"What." His tone made it clear he wasn't up for fucking around.

"Mr. Hopper, if you just give me one chance to prove to you that-"

"No, no, no, no, no. Let me make it very clear to you that I want you to have nothing to do with my daughter whatsoever. No marriage, no friendship, I don't even approve of you guys fucking or whatever-"

"We're in a serious relationship, sir. It's nothing like you think it is."

This made Hop laugh. He continued to do so, holding his stomach, until he realized Billy was unamused. "Oh, you're serious?... My answer is still no, Hargrove. My answer will always be no. Go find someone else's daughter's heart to break. You're not hurting mine."

"It's not like-"

Before he could even get the words out, he was met with a door in his face. Turned down, again.

Can I have your daughter for the rest of my life? Say yes, say yes, 'cause I need to know. You say I'll never get your blessing "till the day I die, tough luck my friend, 'cause the answer's still no!"

Again, again, and again, Billy incessantly pleaded with Hopper. Different tactics were all met with the same answer; rejection.

He held up a sign outside the cabin, only for Hopper to close the curtain and chuckle as he sipped his coffee.

He asked at the door again, only for Hop to threaten to give him a black eye (which was met with "aren't you the sheriff? Isn't that illegal?").

He raced past the police station, Max leaning out the window with another sign, only for Hop to threaten them with holding cells.

He even went as far as to ask Max and El to help, but Hopper had none of that, and sent Max home with a rant full of nos.

However, if Jim Hopper thought any of it would get it into Billy's head that getting his blessing was just not happening- he was as wrong as Nancy when she claimed not to have feelings for Jonathan.

Billy had another plan in mind, and this one was impossible to say no to.

Can I have your daughter for the rest of my life? Say yes, say yes, 'cause I need to know. You say I'll never get your blessing "till the day I die, tough luck my friend- but no still means no!"

"Hopper." Billy stood before his desk, interrupting his nice date with a delicious doughnut, and earning a very annoyed glare. "I got Miss Byer's blessing. Aren't you two a thing?"

"You son of a-"

"I got Eleven's too."

"Hargrove, I'm gonna-"

"Before you cuss me out, I think you should know that I've got a stable job, an interview with a mechanic so I have a job when the pool closes for the winter, and I've got a house on the market I'm looking at. I'm devoted to your daughter and she's devoted to me. You may not like me, but I think you're a great dad, better than the one I was unfortunately stuck with. You raised a strong and amazing woman. She's incredible and I admit, she deserves better than me-"

"You don't have to say that twice." Hopper huffed, crossing his arms.

"I know she deserves so much better than me, I'm surprised she's even with me too. But she loves me, and I think you can see that. I love her too. I would never, in a million years, break her heart."

Jim stayed silent for a few minutes. The silence brought uneasiness to Billy, but that was intentional on Hopper's behalf. He finally piped up with a cough, clearing his throat, before his piercing eyes met Billy's blue orbs.

"I'll hold you to that, Hargrove."

Bonus:

(after the wedding)

"What was that about a no?" Billy quipped with his infamous smirk.

"You're lucky I'm sheriff, Hargrove."

Why you gotta be so rude?

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lokiskitten · 4 years ago

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Tom Hiddleston | nice acting skills

Pt2 : the changing room

Tom Hiddleston x fem!reader

Author’s note : I never originally planned to write a second part but I was being held at gun point so here’s pt2 of the “nice acting skills” imagine KSKSK

plot : after going through this rather peculiar moment, you unexpectedly bump into Tom in one of the changing rooms. From there, things take an unexpected turn.

warnings : smut ( with /legal/ age gap ), unprotected sex, extremely light and discreet spanking.

You were pulled out of your daydream session again by the exhaustingly familiar sound of the director throwing around new orders, setting you and Tom free from set as this scene didn’t necessarily needed to be filmed twice. You were now sent off to the makeup and costumes room which was located nowhere far from the place you currently sat. Tom wasn’t meant to be changing nor getting ready in the same room as you did, which was totally understandable due to the fact that you didn’t share the same gender nor age. He therefore took a different turn than you did, feet leading him to the left as you were accompanied on your right.

You were allowed in your personal changing room, the makeup lady arranging her stencils which laid on the table before the mirror. However, she suddenly seemed to remember about an important detail which she seemingly needed to be getting on the instant. You were therefore left alone with nothing but the costumes and cold cup of tea to keep you company. Sighing tiredly, you sat down on the chair which faced the mirror, eyes falling on your own tired reflexion. However, you were now able to hear the sound of the door opening again, a forced smile appearing on your lips as you expected this person who just walked in to be the makeup artist.

“Did you find what you’ve been looking fo-“ you began, eyes diverting upwards only to land onto Tom’s familiar yet unexpected silhouette. He closed the door behind himself, leaning against the wall as his strong arms crossed against his bare chest. You were now trapped with him. However, it was far from being a bother. But your naturally strong mindset forced you to put up a mask and pretend as if his naked upper body wasn’t something which disturbed your mind and senses. “Oh, it’s you.” You spoke bluntly, trying you best to hide any emotion which could’ve been a threaten to your reputation as a young and serious lady.

Tom smirked. “Yes, it’s me.” He answered, his deep voice which carried a beautiful British accent rolling off his tongue perfectly. It never failed to make your heart and crotch melt. Finally getting up from the door, the older man slowly moved towards your seat before his veiny hands decided to take ahold of the leather material. His ocean blue eyes stared at your reflection in the mirror, yet he wasn’t making eye contact but simply admiring how beautiful your body was. Gently, his hand moved up to your hair which he dragged back behind your ear, fully revealing your beautiful face to him.

“You’re beautiful.” He affirmed, making sure to regulate both his voice and tone in order to guarantee that he would look as attractive as he possibly could- even tho he wouldn’t have needed any of these forced artifacts to seduce you or anyone else. You had caught him red handed through his game, though- again- it was far from being a bother. In contrary, you enjoyed it. However, the little voice in your head couldn’t help but beg you to deny his offer whilst the other part of yourself desperately wanted you to give in his flirts. Your body easily became a battlefield for those two separate opinions to fight and argue endlessly.

Face to your lack of answer- and that mostly because you were lost in your thoughts- Tom tilted his head before moving his hands down to the opening of your robe, gently starting to pull on it in order to reveal your bare chest. However, your own hand was soon to move up to his wrist and take a firm hold of it, asserting dominance and stopping the older man through his track. Face to this hostile move, the actor couldn’t help but grow confused. He frowned and accepted to respectfully pull his hand away. “Do you not want this? I beg your pardon, I thought you shared those same feelings which previously took possession of my body.” Tom explained, referring to how he felt whilst shooting the infamous scene barely a couple of minutes ago.

“No no, I do.” Your responded, your main priority being to make sure that he wouldn’t feel like he was in the wrong nor inappropriate. You finally agreed to get up from the chair you have been sitting on, still unfortunately remaining shorter than your screen partner who towered above you. “But isn’t this... not such a good thing? I mean, I always hear people brag about not mixing your love life with coworkers.” You explained, remaining aware that Tom surely didn’t work that way, which was easily noticeable if you bothered to take a look at the female casts from the movies he’s played in and link it all up with his never ending list of ex romantic partners.

Upon noticing that he didn’t seem to truly pay attention to your words, but more to your face, you stopped yourself through your speech. He was adorning those flirty eyes of his, which no woman could potentially resist to. No matter how hard you fought, in the end, you’d always fall for him. “Can you- stop looking at me like that, with your eyes and.. eyebrows.. and all of it.” You ordered, hands gesturing towards his face. Hearing those satisfying words, Tom accentuated his facial features game. “Looking at you like what?” He responded, slowly moving closer to your body until his hands could finally wrap around your waist. It felt like a huge victory to him.

Before you could know it, Tom’s lips pressed against yours, the man offering you a genuine and intense kiss which honestly resembled the ones he’d give you on set. But for now, this didn’t matter. All that mattered was that you were sharing a wanted and needed moment with your screen partner. His hands moved down from your cheeks to your shoulders, pushing off your robe which fell off your body with ease. Unlike him, you didn’t adorn any form of underwear and was therefore left naked for the older man to cherish and enjoy. The kiss progressively intensified, both of your lips parting in order to allow each other’s tongue to come in.

As he embraced your figure, Tom slowly started to push you towards the nearest wall, the two of you stumbling upon a couple of objects before your back could finally collide with the hard material. You moaned against his mouth, knee moving up to his hip which allowed you to feel his hardening bulge against your sensitive core. Your clit was throbbing, begging for sexual satisfaction coming from the man. Feeling your leg suddenly raise against his hip, Tom’s hand moved underneath your thigh and made sure to hold it up there, offering you some free support so you wouldn’t have to carry the heavy member on your own.

Tom cared a lot about the feminine pleasure- probably more than he did care for his own- which would surely guarantee you a good time spent with him during this early afternoon.

Upon feeling that you were now wrapping your arms around his neck, Tom decided to take the initiative to pull his boxers down- setting free his hardening member which had yet to grow to its full size. He was now able to fully pick you up, hands wrapped underneath your thighs in a cautious manner. His tip wouldn’t stop colliding with your soaking hole, visibly begging for entrance without ever truly daring to cross the step. Thankfully, you knew that Tom had always been a very determined man who usually reached out for the stuff he wanted instead of waiting for people to give it to him.

Therefore, it didn’t take long for him to carefully sit you down on his cock, being able to feel that you were now wet enough to painlessly welcome in his prominent member. You guys moaned together, his forehead pressing against yours as his girth was progressively coated with your love juices. Once he reached balls deep, the actor decided to take a couple of seconds in order to allow you to adjust to his size, ocean blue eyes looking up at your face which he admired and praised more than anything in the world at the moment.

Kissing your lips, Tom began to move again, hips gently and cautiously thrusting forward and retracting backwards repetitively until he felt like he could now fasten his pace. Meanwhile, you found yourself lost through pleasure and bliss, forehead firmly pressed against his as you decided that it would probably be wiser for you to keep your mouth shut and avoid to attract anyone else’s attention. Besides, you only wanted and needed his. Moaning out loud would’ve been a great risk to take as the two of you remained aware that you were in a studio filled with thousands of working people. Therefore, Tom regulated his pleasure by wincing and hissing silently whilst you decided to carry on humming sensitively.

Your arms remained wrapped around his neck as he carried on pleasuring your cunt as well as his own member, lips praising your neck which in some way also helped him through the restricted moans process. His girth rubbed past every single sensitive spot of yours, g-spot going wild and swelling out of pleasure due to the man’s perfectly appropriate actions and mannerisms. However, and without giving you a warning, Tom suddenly pulled out in order to flip you around- you chest now facing the wall as you were soon to understand that your job was now to bend over for him. His arms had probably grown tired of carrying you, which you acknowledged and understood.

Before he decided to bend you over, his large hands moved up to your breasts from behind your back, caressing and squeezing them with a lot of lustful care before he retracted his hand back to your spine, pressing his palm against your flesh and forcing you to slightly bend over. There wasn’t much space between you and the wall, which therefore only allowed you to fold a little bit. Your own palms collided with the wall as Tom’s hand caressed all the way down to your bum, giving the flesh a gentle slap before allowing his digits to take ahold of his own girth. He guided his tip to your entrance again, taking time through his actions to make sure that he would execute them properly and painlessly. Even through lust, Tom remained a gentleman.

Feeling his hardness slide inside of you again made your legs tremble, yet Tom made sure to hold you up by giving your hips a gentle and reassuring squeeze. The muscles he had developed through the intense hours spent at the gym contracted as he began to move in and out of you as you tried your best to once again remain silent and discreet. Though, a couple of moans eventually had to escape your lips. Tom shushed you respectfully, giving your bum a light spank which stood as a punishment face to your risky behavior. Yet you refused to complain, smile appearing on your parted lips as the older man continued to pound your core.

Eventually, his hips began to stutter, thrusts gaining in sloppiness which was due to his nearing orgasm. This once Tom didn’t manage to hold back his own moans, hums and groans escaping his lips as he respectfully pulled out right before white strings of sperm could be projected against your cervix. Instead, the thick liquid landed on your back, staining your flesh. “Fuck..” he praised, taking a deep breath in before exhaling loudly. His hips continued to gently rock against yours, shaft rubbing against your upper bum as Tom wished to fully get over his orgasm.

You were left emotionally shattered, body still recovering from the intense amount of emotions and sensations which had previously taken possession of your body- brain still attempting to figure out wether this was right or negative for both of your careers.

Y’all asked : I deliver. I hope you managed to enjoy it! Requested tags : @lokis-leah @marianastudiesart @fa-me @lokistoriesblog @sunshineyrosie @delightfulheartdream ❤️

[ Every single share/comment/like means a lot to me as a writer! Please never doubt that! I acknowledge and praise each one of those interactions as they also help to motivate me. Love you guys💜 thanks for the support. ]

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songmingisthighs · 4 years ago

Text

[19.06] mafia!hongjoong × reader

⇀ you were interested in hongjoong, a notorious leader of a very successful mafia organization. sadly he didn't see you that way. if only he knew the true you before making a rash judgement

⇁ tw : mafia life, angst, mentions of black market activities, death, violence, dark stuff. read at your own risk.

⇁ disclaimer : the author does not support any and all criminal/illegal acts. the narrative written in this story is purely fiction out of the author’s imagination. the things written here does not portray real mafia life nor is the author aware of how the mafia life is like. the author is a hermit loser.

The door to Hongjoong's office opened and in walked his right hand, with a teasing smirk on his face. Hongjoong looked up from the paperwork on his desk and looked up to the man with a raised eyebrow, "what are you smirking at?" he questioned.

Seonghwa nodded his head towards the door, "there's someone here for you," he said whilst holding onto his laughter. Hongjoong shifted his gaze from his friend to the door and then back to him again, "who?" "your girlfriend," Seonghwa teased.

Before Hongjoong could throw anything at him, though, Seonghwa had run off, laughing heartily.

Not long after, you came into his office with a wide smile. As per usual, you were dressed to impress, head to toe with a black and white vintage channel mini skirt and blazer, adorned with a channel necklace and earrings. As you walked in, Wooyoung, one of Hongjoong's trusted men, looked at your passing figure with mouth hanging low and a starstruck look on his face. But you didn't care, you only had eyes for Hongjoong.

It has been roughly five months since you started dropping into Hongjoong's office. Your dad, an equally highly successful head of the mafia from where you're from, wanted you to get married to expand his business and make more allies. He gave you several options but you were immediately intrigued by Hongjoong, one of the mafia heads he made a partnership with by providing him with weapons. The comprehensive file your dad gave you did Hongjoong no justice so you decided to get to know him for real.

Unluckily, Hongjoong is very secretive and protective of himself and his family (re: his brothers; his most trusted men in the mafia). He had been betrayed so many times before and his thirst for revenge both became his strength and downfall. While he managed to build a highly acclaimed mafia organization at such a young age, he closed off everyone who he deemed not worthy of his attention even after only seeing them for less than five minutes.

Sadly, that included you. You weren't the only one who got a comprehensive file on the other, he too had one of you. A straight-A student from Wharton with hobbies consisting of horseback riding and charity? He wondered whether you were preparing to take over your dad's mafia or to steal the Crown of England and be its ruler.

Hongjoong tried his best to hold in a groan of annoyance but even so, some still escaped him and you heard it. Though you were used to it so you just ignored him.

"Hi, Joong," you grinned widely at him, walking in and putting a medium-sized box of cake on his desk after closing his door. "Don't call me Joong," he grumbled.

In all honesty, your bubblegum personality sickened him. He knows for a fact that no one is that happy-go-lucky and excited and has rainbows shooting out of their asses 24/7. So there has to be something you were hiding from him.

You only chuckled at his response, "You're a sourpuss, you know that? You're gonna have wrinkles before you hit thirty if you keep frowning all the time like that," you said as you focused yourself on opening the cake box.

Inside it was the cake you made for him. All the times you visited him, you never made him something from scratch. You were trained to be the head of a mafia organization one day, not in the kitchen. So that cake was the very first thing you made and you were beyond proud of yourself.

"Look," Hongjoong exhaled sharply, starting to get annoyed even before you did anything, "You came at a bad time, I need to get a hundred thousand things done before tonight, in case you didn't realize, my organization is-" "in the brink of war with Stray Kids, I know, I've read the reports," you simply said, hands moving to cut the cake in front of you to hand to him.

"I have connections with the leader's soft spot, the foreigner one, I can make a deal that would help your case if you would jus-"

"NO!!!!" he yelled out, slamming his hands onto his desk, startling you so much that you accidentally dropped your knife and stepped back a little.

Maybe it was the stress of having to deal with things alone, or maybe it's just him finally snapping from overthinking about you, but one thing's for sure is that he had had enough. He needed to put you in your place.

"You may be your daddy's little princess back home, all dressed in white and pink and lace, showered with Channels, Tiffanys and your hoity-toity prestigious Wharton degree. But here, you're nothing, got me? You understood nothing about having to work your ass off to get the recognition and rewards you deserve, you had your daddy behind you this whole time and that's very convenient for you. But don't come here and act like you know shit, okay? Our worlds are different, you came from a cotton candy palace, I came from the ditch, your opinion means less than shit to me," he spat out so quickly, he didn't realize that your expression changed to something that he had never seen before.

Your eyes were blank and glazed, lips slightly quivering and chest heaving.

Hongjoong thought that he had really put you in your place and he was about to celebrate the fact that he might finally drove you away when you opened your mouth.

"Cotton candy palace? Not understanding having to work my ass off?" you choked out.

At first, Hongjoong thought you were gonna cry. But a sadistic, maniacal laugh resonated in the room from where you were doubled over, holding onto your stomach.

It was Hongjoong's turn to be stunned into silence.

"Oh my god, I thought you were smarter than that," you muttered as you calmed down, wiping tears from the corner of your eyes, "you think that this is who I am?" you asked with a raised eyebrow at him.

Hongjoong was confused about whether or not he should speak. It was the first time anyone had ever stunned Hongjoong and Hongjoong didn't know what to do.

"I was born from a girl who was en route to be sold in a human trafficking ring, I came out premature and was about to be sold to a satanic cult as their sacrifice but my 'dad' 'rescued' me. I was stored in a facility with thirty other children, we were trained to be assassins since before we could walk, brainwashed with ideals that ruined our brains. One by one, each year some of us were taken out if we show a lack of improvement or no promise," as you talked, you took off your earrings and necklace and put them on Hongjoong's desk.

While you ran a hand through your messy hair, you stared into him deeply, "I was seven when I first killed someone, my last competition. She was two years older than me and she was sold by her parents for coke money, or as the warden told us. We were reminded every day of how worthless we are so we wouldn't rebel and escape. But even in despair, I wanted something more. That's where daddy came in. He was impressed with me and he took me in as his daughter, telling people one of his whores were pregnant with me to assure my legitimacy. I was schooled in my own private red room. I had to fight for my right as a human being, I made deals with my dad to be able to go out with bodyguard escorts for only an hour every month,"

Hongjoong's eyes followed your hands that gripped onto the edge of your skirt, "did your little binder wrote that I went on my first official mission when I was just twelve? My dad cut the ballet lesson that I trade in for 120 hours of combat training short to gear me up, put me in a room of adult men and sent me off to plant an active bomb in 5 minutes in an air vent of the headquarters of his rival, crazy, right?" you chuckled humorlessly whilst ripping your skirt off to reveal your black shorts inside, a knife and a gun holstered on your thighs were revealed, making Hongjoond's eyes widened.

He never would have imagined someone like you to carry weapons under your very girly outfit. Or to even have such a traumatizing backstory.

"My whole appearance is compensation for my very dark upbringing, I wanted to hide it all. My dad told me I was stupid, that I belonged in the dark, dark world. But when I went to Wharton, I tried to change myself. I thought that I might be able to be the person I wanna be by marrying someone my dad approved so I don't have to take over wholly, I could just be the voice by the side, lending my skills and help the organization indirectly,"

You looked down at your heels clad feet for a second, letting your toes point and moving them from left to right to see what it looks like.

At this point, Hongjoong felt bad for having blown up at you. You had only wanted to spend time with him and even if he didn't want to see you, he could've said it nicely. Hongjoong never felt like this before, it was very weird for him.

He was about to walk over to you when you suddenly took your heels off in a flash and threw them both at Hongjoong so hard that it embedded deep into the wall on either side of his face.

Your usual smile was replaced with a frown, the eyes that usually twinkled showed nothing but darkness. He barely recognized you and he was on edge about it.

"You made your standing with me perfectly clear, Kim Hongjoong, while my dad is one to stop things before they become an issue, I like to see how things unravel," you smirked at him.

"What do you mean by that?" he asked, not being able to process anything.

"It means that your partnership with my dad is off, good luck finding a new weapons supplier," you spat out before turning around to leave the room, leaving traces of yourself behind at his office.

Hongjoong wanted to call after you, try to make things better somehow. But his head still couldn't even wrap around the shocking information you had just revealed.

Not long after you left, Yeosang came in but stopped at the door, scanning the room that was littered with remnants of you. "What the fuck happened here? Did a hooker tried to kill you!?" he asked, still confused at the situation.

When Yeosang looked up, he saw Hongjoong in a way he had never seen him before.

Nervous.

"I-I- I think I just forged a war between us and the largest mafia weapons manufacturer on the eastern hemisphere," he uttered out.

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spiltscribbles · 4 years ago

Note

Miss you and your marvelous writing!!!! Just a prompt if you’re up to it 😊 exes wolfstar staying friends but sirius gets into a new relationship and he brings his new boo to somewhere he took remus and remus gets sad 😭 but they get back together eventually

Notes: OMFG BABEY! this is so SO beyond precious of you! i adore you to bits! thank you for the sweetness and for this scrumptious angst🥺🥺 i really hope you like it😭😘😘💜

SEND ME A PROMPT | A Reblog means SO SO much! I ADORE YOU💜💜

“He can just be so… So” James pauses right then, takes off his cap with the hand that’s still clutching his baseball bat, and ruffles his hair with the other.

“Un-opinionated,” Remus offers half heartedly as they turn the block to the small coffee shop nearest school, both of them freshly showered after the required morning workouts for Tuesday and Thursdays. It’s the first semester in which Remus has actually joined in on the seven minute track, considering the fact that even despite their crazy contradictory schedules with all the sports and extra curriculars they each had, Sirius always made it a point to buy their ice coffees and drop it off to Remus, sometimes leaving them a quarter of an hour late for first period, or as just a quick drop and dash if one of them had an exam.

It was sweet, considerate. It was Sirius showing how much he cared because he’s never been one for words, even if he would frequently print off the little texts Remus would send him about how Sirius made him feel, and hang it up on the wall besides his bed, along with photos of them and Remus by himself and a few of their other friends too.

But yeah… None of that is really a thing anymore, not the coffees or the texts or the promises of being one another’s always. Not after calling it quits in early January because they knew by August they’d be working with thousands of miles between them and a three hour difference on top of that. It just wouldn’t have been feasible in the long run, and sure— Remus was the one to broach the topic and he knows that Sirius was hesitant about the logical side of it, but sometimes Remus wishes Sirius had fought harder, had argued louder, had wanted Remus more. But that’s a ridiculous expectation, and he had only admitted as much to Lily. And at the end of the day, it was the right choice, because it’s only early May now, and Remus can’t imagine how sick he’ll feel once catching his flight to Berkeley, and they’re steadfastly back in the best friends category of things. He can’t fathom how it would’ve been if they spent all these months and the ones after being together in all those intimate ways, knowing that they’ll be so far apart soon enough.

It was the right decision for the both of them and their friendship.

“Yeah, sure. Let’s go with that,” James says, bringing Remus out of his gloomy contemplations while opening the glass door to Three Broomsticks, sporting a thin smile that he always has on when he’s trying to be kind even when he’s irritated as all get out.

Remus snorts at him, elbow checking his side as he walks past. “Well he’s sharing that dorm with you and Sirius in New Haven, so I guess you’ve got that to look forwards to.”

James’s face pulls into a grimace and their typical barista nods their way, already receiving their orders through the app and sparing them having to wait in the queue. “Maybe Pete’ll grow his own personality in university, yeah?”

“Sure Prongsie,” Remus says, noncommittal as he checks his phone and lies against the windowpane, already exhausted by the morning. “And if he doesn’t, I’m sure Sirius is about to blow his lid any day now.”

“It’s going to be funny as fuck, and you won’t even be there to see the debris,” James counters, sounding pleasant enough even though Remus knows that he’s nearly as pissed off as Sirius is about the decision for him to go back to his home state for undergrad.

“You’ll send pictures though.”

“Of course Moony my old friend,” James jokes, tossing him a wink as they straighten once spotting their coffees being rung up. But as Remus takes a step forwards, he notices that a familiarly tan pair of hands are reaching for them, and when Remus looks up he feels like an idiot for not noticing him sooner. Because there Sirius is, dashing as ever in their school’s maroon blazer and tan pants, and his hair is windblown and shining as it falls midway of the nape of his neck. But Remus doesn’t really have the chance to appreciate just how damn good looking his ex-boyfriend is, rather, he’s more distracted by how Sirius doesn’t even notice him or James as he pivots around and hands over the second cup to a beaming Gideon Prewett. Their heads incline while they exchange a few words that are absolutely impossible to pick up in the crowded cafe before they bump their shoulders together and walk out the opposite door.

And it feels like nothing else watching that exchange— like their was a hammer and pick chipping away at his stupid, weeping heart.

“I think they’re just doing a project together,” James says lowly in Remus’s ear, clapping him on the back in reassurance, and Remus loves him, but he’s not in the mood for false platitudes, feels like there is a ugly, burning fire festering deep in his stomach and making Remus want to hurl all over the wooden floors.

“Yeah, I’m sure,” he replies instead, mild as he discretely picks up his phone again and opens up to the last conversation he had this morning.

R: need intel

L: Say more sexy things to me, lover

R: sirius and Gideon

R: what’s going on there

L: I’ll take a look, dw

Buoyed by Lily’s scary levels of detective skills, Remus returns his phone to his satchel and signals James to follow him to pick up their actual drinks. “C’mon, Flitwick hates it when we’re late.”

“Do you want the good news first, or the bad.” Lily asks Remus later that morning during their shared free period, dropping her bag on the tabletop that they typically commandeer towards the back of Hogwarts’s library, nearest the windows and tucked away by the shelves.

“Is there actually any good news? Or are you just saying that to make me feel better.” Remus asks, single brow cocked as he shuts his history book and tosses it to the side.

“Well your hair looks especially nice today,” she offers with a small smile, sitting besides him and ruffling his curls.

“Thanks, I suppose. But I’d rather just get to it. And don’t sigh at me like that! All long suffering and all.”

Rolling her eyes, Lily gathers her hair into a high pony before turning to Remus fully. “You’re my best friend, I love you more than just about anyone. You know that, right?” Lily asks him, stiff stance relaxing when he nods in turn. “Then understand that I’m saying this from a place of love, but you don’t get to be mad at him, okay. You’re the one who called it off Re, you’re the one who wanted you guys to go back to being friends to avoid that messiness in August. And you know I respect the decision, but also it wasn’t the only one to be had. I mean look at James and I—“

“You’re going to Columbia Lils,” Remus bristles, hates how defensive he’s getting all of a sudden. “That train ride is like two hours and some change at the very most. It’s not the same.”

“You guys could’ve made it work,” she insists, green eyes blazing in the dim light. “He’s crazy about you, and you’re in love with him— Like ass backwards in love. You can’t just cut that off like it’s nothing, damn it, Remus.”

He can feel his own ears reddening and Remus hates it, hates how today had started off so innocuous and now it’s an absolute shit show. Remus hates that Lily is always correct about everything, and hates how Sirius probably is regretting telling Remus he still fully intends to ask him out to prom, and hates how much he loves him— how whenever he looks at Sirius it’s just a deluge of wanting and adoring and regretting and needing to feel his lips against Sirius’s own again like a drug, how he’ll never forget how he tasted like coffee beans and cigarette smoke and the strawberries he ate every morning besides his breakfast. Remus hates it all and he can’t figure out how not to feel like suddenly everything is slipping out of his hands like sand drifting through his fingers.

“He’s probably not that crazy over me anymore considering he’s getting Gideon Prewett coffees now, so maybe it’s the right decision after all.” Is what Remus decides to tell Lily instead of that whirlwind of clashing feelings.

“Oh Christ,” Lily huffs, dropping her head back like she’s asking for strength from the heavens above. “Look, Dorcas tells me that they’ve only been out twice. And Marlene says that it’s nothing intense. Just a movie and then he went to go watch his nephew’s little league game.”

“Oh,” Remus intones, because, no. No he will not start crying like this is some fucking Nicholas Sparks novel, and he’s the wayward lead making all the worst decisions. He’s not going to cry damn it!

He is not a bird, and this is suppose to be happening, and none of this has any real consequence at the end of the day. He and Sirius broke up, and Sirius can go out with whoever he pleases— even if it’s good looking, ginger athletes.

Remus is fine.

“Remus,” Lily gently consoles, lacing her fingers into his own that’s resting on his lap, and squeezing for good measure. “Benjy told Mary, who told me during Calc that Gideon doesn’t expect anything. Sirius told him he’s not looking for anything long term.”

“That’s dumb,” Remus retorts, trying to hold everything in so that Lily doesn’t give him that concerned, doe eyed face of hers, like when he’s spent a week living off of protein bars and double shot espressos preparing for finals. “Gideon’s great, and there on the soccer team together, they would be perfect.”

“Remus, stop.”

“And he’s going to Dartmouth, so he’ll be super close for like weekend excursions and all of that.”

“Remus!”

“The more I think about it, Lils, the more it makes sense. They just fit.”

“Sure, those are all nice attributes,” Lily says, peering up at him disappointedly. “But he’s not you.”

Like a legion of angels singing in the distance, the bell begins to shrill for next period and Remus is spared from giving that statement any mind.

He spends the rest of the week acting as if he hadn’t even seen Sirius that morning whenever around him, and internally analyzing each and every exchange between them, and comparing to them to when he sees Sirius chatting with Gideon. And it’s not fun to say the least. It’s like a flashback to when he was trying to hide his crush on Sirius back in Freshman and most of sophomore year, but somehow worse. It’s worse because Remus had him, had Sirius in all the ways someone could ever want an other. He had Sirius’s languid morning kisses, and Sirius’s bark like laughter. Remus had Sirius being nervous the first time Lyall came for his typical Christmas visit, and Sirius had to try and impress him along with Remus’s mom as more than just the friend he hung around with at school. Remus had Sirius’s gruff voice when they were in bed and getting tangled into one another, and Sirius’s dopey looks in the middle of class when he’d be gazing over at Remus instead of the board. And if Remus is being honest, he knows he still has all those things, but it’s suddenly and searingly clear that some time— sooner rather than later— they’ll all leave, abruptly disappearing and shattering Remus’s world in their wake. Because eventually all of those different facets of Sirius’s won’t be Remus’s anymore— they’ll be Gideon’s or some other boy he meets in New Haven. And Remus can’t even be upset at it, he doesn’t have a claim to any of Sirius anymore, doesn’t get to call any part of him his.

And it’s probably the worst Remus has felt since that first night after their break up, because he’s eating every moment he has with Sirius like he’s famished and Sirius is the last meal he’ll ever know. He wants to memorize every part of him before he can’t have any of it. He wants to unravel every layer of Sirius, and kiss it for the final time, and it’s like saying goodbye a thousand times over, strangling his heart and splintering something desperate deep inside of him.

Like now.

It’s edging on midnight, and they drove up to the lake front near their suburb, with Sirius lying with his head on Remus’s lap and his long, muscled body lying against the tattered blanket beneath them. And his eyes are fluttered shut while the speaker they brought croons out the indie playlist they like most from Spotify.

And Remus can’t help but feel like this is one of their last nights like this, alone and quiet and together without any other specter of some other partner. So he watches him, watches the moonlight pacing over his nose and the high bones of his cheeks and across Sirius’s eyelids too. Remus watches his ink like lashes kissing his skin, and wants to touch the divot of his cupids bow like so many times before while his other hand cards through Sirius’s hair.

And Remus lets himself want Sirius and wonders if he’ll ever stop wanting, craving, loving him.

“I can hear you thinking Moons,” Sirius says, fluttering his eyes open and crunching up before Remus can even respond. “What’s going on?”

“Huh? What do you mean? I’m fine.” Remus all but sputters, folding his knees against his chest and wrapping his arms around them, feeling somehow vulnerable in blistering ways. “Nothing is going on.”

“Pff,” Sirius gives him a pointed look, settles down so that they’re side by side and tries to get Remus to look at him head on. “You’ve been strange all week, Moony.”

“That’s not—“

“And then tonight, you didn’t even tease your ma when she was telling us about that patient who puked all over her shoes.”

“Just tired is all.”

“But had enough energy to smoke half the joint I brought.” Sirius says with a snort, looking frustrated again when Remus didn’t even flinch a smile at the counter. “Remus, talk to me.”

“It’s fine Sirius,” Remus sighs, suddenly remembers how exhausting all their arguments were in the past. How Sirius tries getting him to speak everything in his mind, as if Remus could even put them into words.

“Okay, then tell me why you rejected my offer to go to that Frank Ocean concert. You’re obsessed with him.”

“’S in July,” Remus reminds him lightly, focusses on the way they can see the North star glimmering against the horizon instead.

“And, so?” Sirius asks, sounding more than a bit scathing. “You’re not leaving for another month after that, you trying to cut me off completely by the summer or something?”

“Don’t be an idiot.”

“Don’t be condescending.”

“Sirius, just leave well enough alone. Holy shit.”

“I can leave it alone if you can actually tell me what the fuck is going on with you,” Sirius snaps, standing up now, probably because he always likes using his height advantage on most people whenever he gets all pissy.

“You can be such a prick sometimes, you know that?” Remus snarls at him, following suit and dipping his head back just slightly so that they’re eye to eye. “Not everything is on your schedule, you know that.”

“My schedule!” Sirius’s brows jump to his hairline, and he breaks into that manic laughter that springs up only when he’s so angry he can’t put his thoughts together. “I’m trying to do as much shit with you as possible before you leave, because for some stupid fucking reason I’m going to miss you when your across the fucking country! But yeah, whatever. If you’re actually just sick of me and my presence or what the fuck else, you can just—“

“I would’ve assumed you wanted to go with Gideon,” Remus blurts out, simply unable to hold it back any more, unable to pretend like he’s not suffering a thousand fresh paper cuts every time he even glances Sirius’s way these days. He can’t do this, can’t pretend to just be friends when they were— when they are— so much more than that. “To the concert I mean. I just assumed—“

“No,” Sirius says, seething as he storms up to Remus— close enough that the tips of their noses brush up against each other.

“No? Excuse me?”

“No Remus you don’t get to do this!” Sirius repeats, voice going frayed at the edges as their glances level. “You don’t get to pretend as if I want anyone more than I want— than I’ve always wanted you. And you don’t get to float around for the rest of your life pretending as if this’ll ever change for me. As if you can’t hit me up in fifteen years when I’m married with kids, and ask to get back together, and think that I wouldn’t drop it all for you.”

Remus’s heart begins to thud, loud and painful against his ribcage, and his lungs feel like they might collapse the instant Remus let’s the tears swimming in his eyes sprinkle out. “Sirius, I ca—“

“I’ve been in love with you since before we were suppose to mean what that meant, damn it, Remus! And you’re the one who called it off!”

“It was the right decision.” Remus croaks out, plunging his hands into his hoodie’s pockets, doesn’t want Sirius to see the way they’re shaking.

“”For you. The right decision for you.” Sirius presses, his gray eyes dark underneath the stars. “And you know I’d do anything you wanted of me, but you don’t get to be mad at the ways I cope. And you sure as fuck don’t get to be jealous of fucking Gideon Prewett, as if he can hold a match to you.”

“Oh.” Is all Remus can gather to say, peering back down at his shoes and pressing together his lips, feels the most lost he ever has while around Sirius. “I love you too, you know that. You know I love you so much that it hurts sometimes— That was never the problem.”

Sirius makes a strangled sound deep in his throat, and the next second, Remus can’t feel the warmth of his body besides him because Sirius is darting over to the cusp of the lake and kicking at a rock. “Fuck, Remus. You can’t just say that, all right! You can’t because none of this is fair, or okay. And I fucking hate it and I hate this and—“

“Maybe we can try,” Remus says, quiet but unshaken. And he watches as Sirius slowly turns back around, face scrunched up in utter confusion, but eyes glittering with something like hope. “I love you Sirius, and you love me. And Lily’s right, fucking hell she’s so right. I can’t just turn it off, okay. I’ve tried and I’ve tried, but I can’t. I can’t be around you and not want every part of you. But I also can’t let myself stay away from you. So let’s try, and it’s probably a stupid difficult decision, and we’re going to be frustrated and we’re going to miss one another but I know there’s going to be no one I want more and I think you migh— Oof.”

Remus can’t continue rattling off any of the reasons why they should get back together, because Sirius is somehow magically popping up in front of him— his large hands cupping against Remus’s jawline and his thin lips crashing against him, and Remus can only wrap his arms around Sirius’s torso and give him back all he’s pushing forwards.

And it might’ve been a minute or an hour that past, but Sirius is pulling back with a face that looks lighter in ways Remus hasn’t seen on him since the breakup all those months ago. “I’d literally agree to anything if it means we can stay together, Moony. Absolutely anything.”

Remus feels the strain against the apples of his cheeks as he beams at him at the sound of the oath. “Yeah, me too Padfoot. Always and forever, it’s you.”

My Other Wolfstar FIC💜

#WOLFSTAR #REMUS LUPIN #SIRIUS BLACK #SIRIUSXREMUS #REMUSXSIRIUS #WOLFSTAR ANGST #WOLFSTAR FLUFF #THE HARRY POTTER SERIES #HARRY POTTER SERIES #MARAUDERS #SPILT INK #I AM A MESS #I HATE ME LMFAO

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mrs-gucci · 4 years ago

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Rough Around the Edges {Prince Kylo Ren x Reader}

author’s notes: hello, hello! taking a quick break from all the fourth of july stuff to submit this piece for this week’s writer wednesday :) thanks @autumnleaves1991-blog and @clydesducktape for organizing this wonderful weekly event!

this story takes place in a medieval AU and is lightly inspired by certain elements in “Beauty and the Beast”.

warnings: angst with a hopeful ending. partially unreciprocated feelings. arranged courtship. time period-authentic sexism (women are meant to please men and that’s all). there’s a kiss.

(possible) tw’s: arranged relationship. implied age gap (not specified, but everyone’s above age).

word count: a touch over 2k

my taglist peeps: @frank-and-honey @shygirl268 @icarusinthesea @gildedstarlight @mrs-zimmerman @soldmysoulagain @roseepossee @pascalisfairyy (if you’d like to be added to or removed from my taglist, the link to the google form is HERE or on the top of my masterlist.)

You sit in front of the mirror while Anna pulls your hair into a flattering updo. Your eyes begin to tear up at the painful sting of your hair being manipulated in such a forceful way, scalp throbbing with each of Anna’s harsh, calculated movements.

"Must you be so rough?”

She offers little empathy in her expression as she looks at you through the mirror’s reflection. “The Prince insisted that you wear your hair up tonight, madame. He was absolutely furious when you wore it down the last time, and I’m the one who had to stand there while he threw a tantrum over it.”

Your eyes roll, knowing all too well of your betrothed’s legendary fits of anger. He’s much too old to be doing such childish things, but god forbid you ever say that to him.

Anna finishes up with your hair, much to your relief, but now the real pain begins. You look over at the corset waiting on the bed and already, your ribcage aches.

“What, are you trying to turn it to stone?” She asks, and you shake your head. “Well, you’re certainly staring at it long enough. Come on now, stand up, we don’t have all afternoon.”

You sigh, rising up out of the chair and walking over to the bed where Anna’s standing, corset in-hand. She wraps it around your torso, pulling the laces impossibly tight over your ribs and stomach, caging them both within the garment.

After the corset is very securely tied, Anna grabs your dress and helps you step into the golden yellow skirt. She ties the top part with just as much aggression as she tied the corset, making simply breathing a painful process.

“Try to at least look like you don’t want to jump out of the East tower’s window.” Anna remarks as you scowl at your reflection in the mirror. “Have you ever considered smiling?”

“I have absolutely nothing to smile about.” You reply curtly, unamused by this conversation or her suggestions.

She sighs in defeat. “I’m only trying to help, madame. You need to learn how to be a princess, or at least try and act the part.”

“I’m not interested in being a princess, Anna. But, if you ever asked my opinion on the matter, then you’d already know that. Now please, I wish to be alone.”

Anna’s surprised at the hostile tone of your words, but she keeps her lips pursed, knowing she’s in no place to press the issue any further. She simply nods, backing out of the room, leaving you alone.

Your bottom lip begins to tremble as your vision blurs with tears, abruptly turning away from the mirror so that you don’t have to look at what you’ve been forced to become.

There’s nothing that you wish for more than to be free from this life, free to live the way you want to live instead of the one that was chosen for you to live. You loathe the mask you must wear, the painted face that looks back at you through the mirror.

But, you have no choice...you’ve never had a choice.

The palace is aglow this evening, thousands of candles burning and casting a warmer shade across the normally-bland ivory color. Your shoes clink on the marble flooring as you make your way to the front steps, looking over the railing at the grand room below.

Lords and ladies, princes and princesses are all arm-in-arm, walking through to the ballroom. Some have stopped to converse with each other, fake smiles plastered on their painted faces.

You huff to yourself as you reach the top of the staircase, and at the bottom, stands your betrothed. He looks up as you make your way down the stairs, a pleased smirk tugging at the corners of his lips with each step you take.

Kylo holds his hand out to you when you reach the bottom, guiding you down the final stair before looping his arm through yours. The two of you walk towards the ballroom, smiling and nodding politely at the other guests.

“You look nice.” His voice is flat, emotionless.

You huff in false amusement, physically having to prevent your eyes from rolling. “Am I supposed to thank you for saying that?”

"Ah, you’re learning.” He says, stopping to look down at you, fingers holding your chin and forcing you to look up at him while his eyes linger over your face. “Perhaps there’s hope for you yet, little dove.”

You yank your chin from his grip, snarling softly. “Don’t touch me.”

His hand suddenly comes up to wrap around your throat, teeth bared. “I can touch you however I please, young one. You’re mine, and you ought to learn your place.”

Once he feels you relax, feels you surrender under his touch, he lets go of your neck and continues walking as if nothing’s happened, dragging you along with him.

He wears you on his arm the whole evening as he talks to various noblemen and you just stand there, silent with a small smile, pretending like you don’t exist.

Then, the two of you take a seat at the big table with King Han and Queen Leia, beginning to feast on the royal spread. You barely eat, partially due to the fact that you’re afraid to bust the ties on your corset if your abdomen expands even a little bit too far, and Kylo seems to take notice.

“I promise I didn’t poison it.”

You look over at him with widened eyes. He simply smirks, laughing softly to himself.

“I’m only joking, little dove.”

You’re incredibly surprised, stunned into utter silence at the fact that he’s just joked with you. You'd been convinced up until this point that humor wasn’t a part of his emotional capabilities, that he was only capable of anger, hatred, and inflicting fear.

His hand hesitantly rests on top of yours, which makes you flinch. He looks conflicted in the moment, as if he’s deciding whether or not to be upset that you react this way to his touch.

“Why aren’t you eating? You need to eat.”

You look away, jaw clenching. “I know you don’t actually care why I’m not eating, Kylo. Plus, none of my answers will be good enough to please you, anyway.”

He stiffens, pulling his hand away immediately.

“Perhaps you’re right.”

Your eyebrows furrow at the tone of his voice. He almost sounds...upset. Not upset at you, though, upset at himself.

The rest of the time he’s silent, only glancing over at you occasionally. Dessert comes around and you don’t even touch it, simply sitting up straight with your hands in your lap.

Couples rise from their tables as the musicians begin to play an upbeat tempo, gathering on the ballroom floor. Kylo stands up next to you, holding out his hand without a word.

You rise from your chair and take his extended hand, allowing him to lead you out to the ballroom floor. Dancing was customary in Alderaan and was a very popular practice at gathering’s like this.

Kylo’s large hands drop to your waist as soon as you reach the floor and you reach up to rest your hands on his broad shoulders. The two of you sway in unison and make your way around the dance floor skillfully, gracefully.

After the song comes to an end and another slower one begins, the Prince tilts his head down to look at you. His face is stoic, unchanging, but there’s something different about this look. It’s not as harsh or as emotionless as it normally is; there’s a certain gentleness to it.

Your eyes keep his gaze, looking back up at him with a curious glint in your eyes, drinking in his up-close appearance for truly the first time since you’ve arrived in Alderaan. He’s intoxicatingly handsome, there’s no getting around that, but his personality and temper leave a lot to be desired.

Yet, despite his hostility and distaste for you, you still find yourself temporarily entranced by his presence, melting under his gaze. It’s in this moment that you catch a glimpse into your own psyche, recognizing the true source of your vehement hate and closed-off behavior towards him.

All of it is done out of a desire to hide your attraction to the man that you’ve tried so, so hard to dislike. There’s always been a small part of you that’s known this, but you figured that if you pushed it down long enough and acted otherwise, perhaps you’d eventually convince yourself otherwise. But, alas, those feelings of attraction have only grown and festered beneath the facade of hatred.

It is true, Kylo Ren is a moody, closed-off, hostile and frankly childish being, but you’re somehow able to look past that and see the diamond-in-the-rough quality to the young Prince. You know that somewhere, behind the stone wall he’s so clearly built up around himself, there’s a goodness to him. You’ve seen glimpses of it throughout the time you’ve known him, but he almost immediately shuts it down instead of letting it show further, a fact you find incredibly perplexing.

“Y/N?” His voice pulls you from your thoughts.

You snap from your temporary trance and shake your head. “Sorry, I was deep in thought.”

“I gathered.” He chuckles softly. “If I asked what it is you were thinking about, would you tell me the truth?”

“Probably not.”

He nods. “I appreciate your honesty.”

The two of you continue to move around the floor before the handsome Prince clears his throat, cheeks flushing a delicate shade of pink.

“May I ask you a question, completely unrelated to my previous inquiry?”

You nod, and he swallows harshly.

“What is it about me that you loathe so much?”

Your stomach drops and you suddenly feel a touch of lightheadedness begin to pressurize within your skull. You’re frozen for a moment as you try to decide whether or not to tell him the truth.

“I don’t...why are you asking me such a thing? I know you don’t actually care about the answer.”

His jaw clenches and his grip suddenly tightens on your hips. “Why do you always insist that I don’t care?”

“Because I know you don’t, Kylo. At least, not truly.” You reply, squirming beneath his grip.

“W-Well, what if...” He huffs, looking away. “What if I do care? Or am at least trying to care?”

You’re genuinely surprised by his words, taken aback for a moment. This is a turn you certainly didn’t see coming...

“I find your ever-changing moods and stubbornness often makes you difficult to deal with. You never try, at least up until this point, to understand my feelings or show any sort of interest in getting to know me, which just makes me feel even more unwanted than I already do, and I--”

Before you can continue, you’re cut off by a sudden presence on your lips. It registers in your mind, then, that he’s kissing you. You stiffen, and he pulls away slowly, eyes staring into yours.

“You are not unwanted, Y/N.” He says, voice low. “Never...p-please never think that.”

Did he just say ‘please’? That’s almost the most shocking thing he’s said thus far.

“I don’t think you’re a bad person, Kylo. Just...a little rough around the edges.”

His entire demeanor shifts for a moment, and for a split second, you swear he looks happy; truly, genuinely happy. Perhaps a bit of relief was sprinkled in, too. He wears a small, barely-there smile as he continues to look down at you.

“I would like to try and change. We should at least try to get along, considering the fact that we’ll be wed soon. I know you don’t want to be here, but I’d like to at least try to make things a bit easier, h-however I can.”

You can’t stop the smile that quickly spreads across your face, delightfully pleased to hear these words. Your expression widens his smile ever so slightly.

“I think we can certainly give it a try.”

Kylo nods, a subtly optimistic expression etched on his features.

“I’m looking forward to it.”

#mrs-gucci #writer wednesday #mrs-gucci writes kylo ren #medieval au #medieval kylo #prince kylo ren #kylo ren #kylo ren x reader #kylo ren x you #kylo ren angst #adcu #adcu community #adcu fanfiction #adcu fanfic #adam driver #adam driver character #adam driver angst #tw: implied age gap #arranged courtship

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engie-ivy · 4 years ago

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Remus is quite smitten with the new guy he's been dating, but as he clearly can't have nice things, he completely ruins it and now he can only wait for Sirius Black to break up with him. Sirius Black has a different interpretation.

“I called your father an ignorant idiot who should shove his prejudiced opinions up his arse!”

Sirius frowns, like he doesn’t understand why Remus would consider that an issue. “My father is an ignorant idiot who should shove his prejudiced opinions up his arse.”

Far from the tree

To: Lily Evans

Lily, my time has come. Please remember me fondly.

Dramatic much, Lupin?

No, Lily. My life is genuinely over.

Okay, spill. How so?

Remember that guy I’ve been dating?

Mmm, let me think. The tall, fit one with the long, soft, dark hair, pretty eyes and broad shoulders, whom you’ve told me about approximately ten thousand times a day?

Yeah, I believe that does ring a bell.

Well, you can forget about him again.

He’s on his way over here to dump me as we speak.

What? No! Why?

I met his parents yesterday...

Remmie! That’s a huge step!

I didn’t know things were so serious between you two?

Things were seriously serious with Sirius!

Ah, but I gather from your first message it didn’t go very well?

It didn’t.

Oh, Remmie, you’re probably being too hard on yourself.

It’s always stressful to meet the parents. I’m sure they’ll understand if you were a bit awkward.

I called his father a narrow-minded bonehead whose imbecile opinions belong in the Middle Ages.

...

Yeah. Yeah, okay. That’s... That’s bad.

Remus, why?!

Because apparently I’m an idiot who has a good thing going and just has to find a way to ruin it for himself.

What did he say?

He drove me home and it was so awkward...

I was so embarrassed for causing such a scene at his bloody parents house, I fled inside as fast as I could, without really speaking to him (yes, I admit, I’m a coward).

I texted you right after I got a message from him just now, saying he’s on his way over, because ‘he needs to talk to me’...

Yikes.

Okay. Okay, maybe... If his family really is so narrow-minded, maybe you dogged the bullet?

He seems nothing like them, though. I really can’t believe those people raised him.

Well, you wouldn’t say me and my sister were raised by the same people, so I guess strange things happen.

But Remus,

Know that if he breaks up with you because you don’t get along with his stupid parents, he doesn’t deserve you anyway!

Normally, I’d agree. But I don’t know if that still goes when you call someone’s mother ‘a vicious old hag, whose arrogance is only equal to her stupidity’.

...

Remus!

What the hell happened there?!

Oh my God, he’s here!

These are officially my last moments of dating a way out of my league-guy.

Well, I guess it was nice as long as it lasted. Might as well get it over with.

I’m so sorry, Remus. I know you really liked this one...

Stay strong! I’ll have the chocolate ready!

With a sigh, Remus tosses his phone to the side and stands to get the door. Might as well get it over with, right?

When he opens the door to reveal Sirius, the positive thing is that Sirius doesn’t immediately begin yelling at him. He doesn’t even look all that angry, really. He just gives Remus a small, uncertain smile.

The negative thing is that Sirius looks bloody gorgeous. He’s wearing an elegant coat, with a scarf loosely draped around his long neck and his hair is hanging loose. Before today, this would definitely be considered a positive thing, but not when Remus is just minutes away from getting dumped by this ridiculously handsome man. There should really be a rule against looking this good when you’re breaking up with someone, Remus thinks bitterly as he steps aside to let Sirius in his apartment.

As Sirius unbuttons his coat to reveal a fitted shirt showing off his lean, muscular form, Remus can only conclude that he has really been fooling himself by thinking this could ever last.

He shakes his head to stop himself from ogling his soon to be-ex-boyfriend. “Would you like something to drink?” He asks, trying to sound composed.

“No thank you,” Sirius replies. “I’d rather get this off my chest immediately.”

Remus doesn’t reply and stares at his feet to brace himself for the inevitable blow.

“I suppose you know why I’m here?” Sirius asks, sounding a bit nervous.

Remus wonders vaguely if Sirius is concerned about hurting his feelings, even after his horrible behaviour of yesterday. “Yeah,” he whispers. “I do.”

Sirius takes a deep breath. “Maybe I shouldn’t have come, but I just had to at least tell you how sorry I am, even if you want nothing to do with me anymore.”

Remus just stares at him, trying to puzzle together what Sirius just said. He’s sorry... about having to break up with Remus? But shouldn’t he lead with the break up? And why would it be up to Remus to want nothing to do with him? Remus is not in a state of mind to deal with this. Can’t Sirius just dump him already?

Sirius is getting more nervous as Remus continues to just stare at him. “So I guess I just... offer you my apologies, and it’s up to you whether you want to accept them.”

“You’re apologizing?” Remus asks.

Sirius nods.

“You are apologizing to me?”

Another nod.

“You to me?”

“Yes, Remus,” Sirius says, sounding distraught. “But don’t worry, I don’t expect anything from you. I know I don’t have the right, after the situation I put you in.”

“I called your father an ignorant idiot who should shove his prejudiced opinions up his arse!”

Sirius frowns, like he doesn’t understand why Remus would consider that an issue. “My father is an ignorant idiot who should shove his prejudiced opinions up his arse.”

“No! I mean, well... yes, but I’m not supposed to say so, right?”

Sirius shrugs. “They had it coming, didn’t they? I’m not gonna make excuses for them. I was just hoping you might still want to give us a chance?”

“Your parents hate me!” Remus splutters.

Sirius lets out a laugh. “Thank God. If they’d liked you, I seriously had to reconsider our relationship.”

Remus blinks at him.

Sirius runs a hand through his hair. “Let me explain. My parents,” he speaks slowly now. “Are awful people. Like, really awful people. I shouldn’t have given in when they demanded to meet you, or I should have at least told you what they’re like. I’m so sorry I put you in that situation and exposed you to them without so much as a warning. I can understand if you hate me right now.”

“Why didn’t you warn me?” Remus asks, as he would’ve much rather been spared the anxiety he has been feeling all day.

Sirius shrugs again. “I suppose I wanted you to form you own opinion? As their son, I’m of course biased to hate them.”

Remus opens his mouth to say that is not how a parent-child relationship is supposed to work, but Sirius keeps talking.

“Look, Remus. You didn’t sign up for dealing with my horrible parents, and I’m sorry I dragged you into it. My family is... messed up, and I can understand if you want nothing to do with that whole mess. I won’t blame you if you just want to stay away from me and my family issues.”

“I...”

I’ll do a whole lot more than deal with crappy parents if it means I get to be with you, Remus wants to say. I won’t judge you based on who your parents are, Remus wants to say. I won’t just abandon you, Remus wants to say.

What he says instead is “I purposely spilled a glass of red wine over your mother’s new couch!”

Sirius looks at him with a fond smile. “Yeah, just when I thought I couldn’t love you more.”

Sirius doesn’t seem to realise what he just said, but Remus’ eyes widen. “You... love me?”

Sirius flushes and starts stammering. “Oh God, I’m sorry! Not that I love you. I mean, look at you. How could I not? But that’s way too soon, isn’t it? And this is the worst timing! I mean, you’re probably super angry with me, and I don’t even know if you still want to see me...”

“I don’t mind!” Remus quickly says. “I mean, I think I rather like that you love me? I think I’m very much starting to feel the same way?”

Sirius looks at him with a hopeful expression. “You do?”

Remus chuckles. “Come here,” he says as he pulls Sirius towards him. “For you, I’d throw my wine over any piece of furniture your mother might own any day.”

Sirius smiles as he leans in to kiss Remus. “In that case, can’t wait till Christmas.”

Remus? How bad is it?

Will regular milk do, or is this a triple chocolate with chocolate chips-type of situation?

Hates his parents, loves me, all good!

#my tumblr writing #wolfstar #wolfstar fanfiction #wolfstar fic #marauders #marauders fanfiction #marauders fic #sirius black #remus lupin #remus x sirius #lily evans

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radiantroope · 5 years ago

Text

Do You Trust Me? || JJ Maybank

pairing: jj x reader

mentions: john b, kiara, pope

requested: yes, i don’t have the exact request because it’s over on @maybanksbitch

summary: jj finds out you’ve never had sex. being the loving best friend that he is, he offers to show you what you’ve been missing.

warnings: swearing, underage drinking, mentions of peer pressure, fluff, protected sex (no glove, no love), very detailed and graphic fluffy smut

wc: idfk but it’s LONG

a/n: well, here it is! the end’s kinda shitty but honestly, i needed to finish this instead of going back to it on and off for a week. this is unedited because it’s long as hell and i’m lazy.

masterlist | add yourself to my tag list

* not my gif. if it’s yours, please let me know so i can give you proper credit!

It was a lazy day at the Chateau for you and the Pogues. Everyone was debating on what to do for the day. John B suggesting surfing, Pope suggested fishing, Kiara desperately wanted to go swimming since it was blistering hot out. You and JJ were the only two who seemed keen on staying in. You’d rather sit around drinking and playing dumb games.

You sat with Kiara and John B in a half circle of old, stained lawn chairs. Pope and JJ were playing their favorite game that you called ‘Balance’. The one where you try and knock the other person off balance by pushing their shoulder. They were both holding strong, neither one leaning too far with each push.

Somehow you’d all gotten on the topic of hookups. JJ glanced your way and caught your eye for half a second. He’d been your best friend since you were in diapers, of course he knew you didn’t hookup with, well, anyone. The other Pogues didn’t know that though.

“Remember Fallon?” John B asked the group, sending JJ a sinister smile.

“Oh my God, she was obsessed with JJ!” Kiara shrieked through laughs.

You couldn’t help but laugh too, earning a glare from the blonde headed boy. Everyone remembered the crazy redhead who spent everyday at the Chateau looking for JJ.

“That was the first and only time we’ve ever had to lock the doors,” Pope recalled the memory, laughing when JJ shoved his shoulder harder.

“Oh, don’t think I don’t remember Crystal,” JJ teased, pointing a John B. “Or Brad,” he added and turned to Kiara with a raised eyebrow.

“God he still texts me,” Kiara muttered, shuddering at the memory of the Touron who practically fell in love with her last Summer.

“What about you, Y/N? We see the guys all over you at the parties. One ever stick?” Pope asked.

JJ’s jaw clenched at his question. He caught your eye yet again and almost fell over when Pope gave him a good push. You knew the blonde hated how guys treated you at parties. He was always there to get you out of those uncomfortable situations.

“Andrew,” you responded, feeling your chest tighten.

Your exboyfriend was a touchy subject. He dumped you after a year together when you still didn’t want to sleep with him. It never felt like the right time and at first he was okay with it, until he wasn’t. He tried to demand you sleep with him because that’s what couples do.

“He was your boyfriend, he doesn’t count,” John B said.

“I met him at a party though.”

“But he wasn’t just some hookup that became obsessed,” Kiara added.

“He was an asshole and friends with Rafe. Let’s leave it at that,” JJ intervened and gave up on the game with Pope.

The blonde walked over to you and instead of taking the empty chair between yourself and John B, he plopped himself right on your lap. You huffed and wrapped your arm around his middle when he leant back against you. You brought your bottle of Budweiser up your lips, giggling as some of the cold condensation dripped on JJ’s bare shoulder and he shivered.

The conversation changed quickly after that. JJ was protective of you and they all knew if they continued, they’d never hear the end of it. No one wanted to be on that end of JJ’s anger.

Eventually, it was decided that John B, Pope and Kiara would take the HMS Pogue our for a ride. Where they ended up was unknown, but they needed to get out of the house.

“Y’all coming?” John B asked as he stood up and stretched.

“Nah, I think we’re gonna hang back,” JJ answered for the both of you, though you weren’t complaining. You missed the days where it was just you and him. It would be nice to spend some quality alone time with your best friend for the first time in forever.

“Suit yourselves, you two have fun,” the brunette shrugged and went to follow your other two friends down the dock.

“But not too much fun!” Pope quickly called, pointing two fingers at his eyes then back at you.

JJ rolled his eyes and sent Pope his middle finger while you laughed. They all teased you two for being so close. They insisted that you were soulmates and just blind to it. You’d be lying if you didn’t feel some type of way towards the blonde, but you always pushed those feelings away. Soulmates could be best friends, right? They didn’t always have to be lovers.

“Okay, my legs are numb. Please get up,” you patted JJ’s stomach and let out a grunt as he stood.

JJ grabbed the chair John B had been sitting in and pulled it over so he could sit in front of you. He leaned forwards and rested his elbows on his knees, hands reaching out and grabbing your free one. He toyed with the bracelets on your wrist and tightened the ones that were coming loose.

You could tell his brain was at work with the way his crystal blue eyes glazed over. He wasn’t really even paying attention to what he was doing. You wanted to ask him what he was thinking about but also didn’t want to ruin the comforting moment. The rough pads of his thumbs started massaging gently into the top of your hand as his eyes flickered up to your face.

“I have a question. You don’t have to answer, obviously, but I’d like to know,” the blonde broke the silence with his soft voice.

You raised an eyebrow in response, giving him the indication to continue.

“I know you don’t hookup with people at parties, but I’ve also never heard you talk about Andrew in that way,” JJ started, causing your heart rate to increase. You knew where he was going with this. “Are you...have you-have you ever had sex?”

You mouth went dry at the blonde’s question. He may have been your best friend, but that wasn’t something you disclosed with him. Your friends may have been comfortable with expressing their sexual endeavors but not you. You let people think what they wanted and didn’t really care if it was true.

Your lack of response made JJ nervous. He didn’t want to pressure you into talking about something you didn’t want to. He couldn’t care less wether you had sex or not, he was just curious. “You can tell me anything, Y/N. You know I won’t judge you,” he added.

“I know, I know,” you told him, twisting your hand to hold the blonde’s. The tiniest smiled curled at the corner of his lips.

“I, um, yeah, no,” you stumbled over your words, cheeks heating up under JJ’s intense stare. “I’ve never had sex.”

“Not even with Andrew?”

You shook your head and let out a small laugh, avoiding his gaze and staring out at the water. “It never felt right with him. He dumped me because I wouldn’t,” you explained, feeling his grip tighten on your hand. “And I hate the idea of drunk, meaningless hookups too. It’s not like I don’t want to have sex, of course I do, just not like that.”

JJ’s bright eyes watched the way your index finger tapped against the neck of your beer bottle. His gaze trailed up your arm and stopped on your lips. He could see that you were chewing on the inside of your bottom lip. He watched your eyes flicker across the horizon, sparkling with the sun’s reflection. Your hair blew over your shoulder in the warm breeze.

“Do you trust me?” your blonde best friend caught your attention with his question.

You turned and met his stare, eyebrows furrowing a bit. You answered, “Of course I do. More than anyone in the world.”

“Would you let me make you feel good? Show you what you’ve been missing?” JJ was calm and collected on the outside, but on the inside his heart was hammering against his chest.

You didn’t know what to say at first. You’d be lying if you said you’d never thought about it. JJ was hands down, the most attractive guy on the island, in your opinion. And you knew him in a way other people didn’t. You didn’t know how you hadn’t already taken the dive and fallen in love with him sooner. With the way he was looking at you right now, it started to seem like a possibility.

The pads of JJ’s fingers started to ghost up and down your arm slowly, causing a shiver to run through you. He tilted his head and questioned you, “Y/N?”

You took a gulp of your beer to ease your nerves and set it in the cup holder of the chair. Breathing in deeply through your nose, your e/c eyes fell on his sapphire ones yet again. You head bobbed as you nodded and small smile spread across your lips, saying, “Yeah.. yeah, okay.”

JJ stood up and pulled you up as well with the hands holding yours. He interlocked you’re fingers and led you the short distance up to the Chateau. With each step your heart started to beat faster. You grasped the blonde’s hand tighter to try and keep yourself from shaking. He smiled over his shoulder at you as you crossed the threshold into the house.

The blonde’s hand left yours once you’d entered the spare bedroom. You turned and shut the door, flipping the lock into place just in case the Pogues came back during your escapades. You turned around and tried not to ogle at JJ who had shed his shirt in the few seconds you’d had your back to him.

A smirk curled on his lips as he sat down on the edge of the bed. You’d seen him shirtless thousands of times, but this was different. His eyes were a darker shade as he stared you down. A heat spread through your body as JJ used one finger to beckon you to him, a soft “C’mere” leaving his lips.

You took the few steps to the bed and stopped in front of him. His hands reached out and landed on your waist, pulling you in between his legs. He guided you down into his lap until you were straddling him. Your soft breaths mingled with his from the close proximity. Your hands found place on the warm skin of his bare shoulders.

“If it starts to be too much for you, just tell me to stop,” JJ’s voice was soft as he reached up and tucked your hair behind your right ear, “Okay?”

You nodded and gave him a small smile, whispering, “Okay.”

JJ’s pointer finger hooked under your chin and pulled your lips to his. He tasted like beer with a hint of mint and his lips were a bit chapped. He could taste your cherry chapstick and a soft hum left him. Your fingers slid their way around his neck and into the soft waves on the back of his head.

The blonde’s hands found your waist again as he pulled you closer. Your head tilted, deepening the kiss as you felt his tongue swipe your bottom lip. You obliged and allowed your lips to part, tongues dancing together. Your head was spinning. Never did you think you’d be kissing your best friend of sixteen years, nor that it would feel so good; so natural.

JJ’s fingers slipped under the material of your shirt, dancing against the soft skin of your hips. You pulled away from his lips, breathless. His eyes were soft as he gazed up at you and pushed his hands higher, your shirt moving with them. His hands sat on your ribs, thumbs stroking your skin.

“Can I take this off?” he whispered, eyes darting between both of yours, reading your expression to make sure you weren’t overwhelmed.

You bit down on your swollen bottom lip and nodded, holding your arms up as JJ removed the clothing. Your arms came back down, hands resting against his defined pecks as he took in your naked chest. It wasn’t unusual for you to not wear a bra. They were uncomfortable and itchy so you hardly ever wore one unless completely necessary.

“God, you’re fucking beautiful,” JJ breathed as his hands came up and cupped the mounds of flesh.

Your heart fluttered at the compliment, cheeks flushing and a smile spreading across your lips. JJ’s head dropped, nose nudging your jaw as you turned your head to the side. He pressed open mouthed kisses to your neck, sharp teeth gently nipping in certain spots. Your eyes slipped closed, breath hitching as he found your sweet spot and focused his mouth there.

His hands stayed on your chest, squeezing your breasts softly. He pinched one of your nipples between his thumb and pointer finger. On the other side his thumb brushed over the peaked nub with the lightest touch. A soft moan escaped your lips at the sensations he was bringing you. Your body was getting hotter, a tingling feeling intensifying between your legs.

JJ lifted his head when he was satisfied with the marks littering your skin. He brought his lips back to yours in a hard kiss, tongue immediately pressing it’s way into your mouth. His hands gripped your thighs as he turned the two of you abruptly.

Your back met the mattress and your lips seperated. He was settled between your legs, hands on both sides of your head. He took in the way your pupils were blown, parted lips puffy from the pressure of his own. Your hair was sprawled around you as short pants left your body. A smile tugged at his lips as he leant down to kiss you again. JJ was starting to think he didn’t care if you were the only girl underneath him for the rest of time.

His lips didn’t stay on your for long, wet kisses being pressed down your neck and chest. You watched him kiss his way down your stomach to the hem of your shorts. His eyes flickered up to yours in question as his fingers lingered around the button.

Your head moved in a single nod and that’s all it took for the boy to undo your shorts and pull them off, your underwear going with them. You felt shy under JJ’s hungry gaze as he dropped your clothing onto the floor. Your thighs went to clamp shut but he put his hands on your knees to stop you.

“Is it too much?” the blonde asked, staring up at you.

“No, no,” you responded quickly and smiled softly, putting a hand over the side of your burning face. “S’just no one’s ever seen me like this before.”

JJ smiled at you and glided his hands up your thighs, leaning down to kiss the inside of your knee. He started to trail his lips up the inside of your thigh slowly, eyes still locked on yours. “You’re beautiful,” he told you again against your skin.

You bit your lip to hide your grin and shifted as he pushed your legs open wider. JJ laid down flat on his stomach in between your legs, nearly moaning as his painfully hard cock brushed against the mattress through his board shorts. His eyes flickered up to your face and remained there as he leaned forward and tested the waters, tongue dragging through your folds slowly.

A soft gasp left your lips at the foreign feeling. The bottoms of your feet pressed further into mattress. JJ repeated the action a few more times, the drag of the velvety muscle against your clit sent jolts of electricty through your body. His middle finger came proding at your entrance, slipping in with ease.

He pumped the single digit and slid his ring finger in beside it after a minute. A soft noise of discomfort left your parted lips. JJ wrapped his lips around your clit and sucked softly to distract from the feeling. There was no stopping the smirk on his lips when a sharp moan left you as he curled his fingers. His tongue flicked at your sensitive bundle nerves and your fingers grasped onto the sheets tighter, another moan leaving your mouth.

“Ah, shit,” you hissed, face scrunching in discomfort as he added a third finger.

JJ looked up at you and then focused his mouth on your quivering inner thighs, trying to ease the pain. “I know, I know. But I’ve gotta make sure you’re good ‘n stretched so it’ll hurt less,” he cooed.

You nodded twice and breathed slowly as you willed your body to relax. JJ’s mouth came down and found your clit again. He swirled his tongue as he began pumping his fingers again. He was pleased to hear your whimpers turn back into moans.

The blonde pulled away when he figured you were stretched enough. He wanted nothing more than to have you cum around his fingers, then his cock, but he thought it might be too much for you. A soft whine came from the back of your throat when his fingers left you and he chuckled.

JJ came to a standing position beside the bed and undid the strings on his shorts. He pushed them down and kicked them off, dick standing hard and proud once it was free. He didn’t miss the way your eyes widened and you nervously swallowed as you eyed him.

“I know it looks intimidating,” JJ started, feeling proud that you were impressed. “But you’ll be okay.”

“JJ, you’re gonna rip me in half with that,” you stated, completely serious.

A loud laugh came from the blonde as he bent down and grabbed a condom from the box stored under the bed. He stood back up and crawled onto the bed, silver foil packet clutched between his fingers.

“That’s not gonna happen, baby, promise,” the nickname directed at you rolled off his tongue and your stomach flipped. You’d always teased each other with names like that but it was different in this sense.

You watched silently as JJ ripped open the condom package. His hands shook the slightest bit as he rolled it on and let out a puff of air from the little contact his erection received. He shuffled closer to you on his knees and hooked his hands under the backs of your thighs, pushing them towards your chest. You bit down on your bottom lip as you felt the head of his cock brush your entrance.

“Ready?” the blonde asked, bright eyes meeting yours. His thumb rubbed gently on the back of your thigh as if to tell you it’s okay to back out now.

You nodded in response and let out a deep breath through your nose. Your hand reached down and gripped onto JJ’s wrist that had your leg held back. He gave you a small smile then looked down between your bodies, free hand helping guide his length into your entrance.

Your mouth fell open, hand squeezing onto his wrist tighter as he pushed into you slowly, inch by inch. JJ’s jaw clenched as your pussy gripped him like a vice. He put the hand that was free on your hip and paused.

“Relax, Y/N, you gotta relax,” he groaned out, resisting the urge to plunge into you like he was used to.

“I’m trying,” you whimpered, tears stinging the corners of your eyes.

“Breathe,” JJ told you, “Breathe through it, baby.”

You sucked in a shaky breath through your nose and let it out your mouth, repeating the action until your muscles started unwinding. The muscular boy above you huffed when he felt you unclench around him. He pressed forward again until his thighs were pressed against the back of your own.

He stayed like that, letting you adjust, drawing soothing circles against your skin as he waited. He looked up to your face and saw you had your eyes clenched shut. His hand came up and caressed the side of your face, thumb brushing underneath your eye.

“You okay?” he asked softly.

You swallowed thickly and opened your eyes to look up at him. He was staring down at you in worry but his eyes were filled with nothing but adoration. The whole scenario was making your head spin.

You were laying there, stuffed full for the first time with your best friend’s cock. What?

“Y-Yeah,” you managed to respond, feeling breathless under his stare. “You can move.”

JJ put the hand that was on your face beside your head, leaning his weight on it as he hovered over you. He pulled out slowly then pressed back in. He pushed your leg back farther with the other hand and thrust his hips again.

It was an agonizingly slow pace, you knew that much, but he was taking his time with you and you’d never been so grateful. Anyone else probably wouldn’t have taken care of you the way JJ was. You couldn’t picture losing it to anyone else in that moment. He was the closest friend you had. He was your person.

JJ’s eyes moved between your face and down to where your bodies met repeatedly. He was entranced by seeing your tight walls grip him so deliciously, but also needed to make sure you were okay. He smirked slightly when he saw the crease inbetween your eyebrows disappear with each thrust and soft, pleasured noises started to leave your lips.

The blonde boy began thrusting faster, unable to contain the low groan that bubbled in his throat. Your hands moved up onto the back of his neck and wrapped around his bicep. Your blunt nails dug into his skin as you moaned louder, head tilting back and pressing into the mattress.

JJ readjusted his position, dropping to his elbows on both sides of you. You hiked your legs up on his hips, breath catching in your throat at the new angle. His cock made you feel so full, brushing against your g-spot with each stroke.

“Fuck, J,” you moaned out, fingers tangling in the hair on the back of his head.

The feeling JJ got when looked at you underneath him and you moaned for him was indescribable. A heat flooded his whole body. He wanted to be the one who made you feel good; the only one. The thought of anyone else seeing you like this infuriated him, but the feeling of your hand tugging on his hair brought him out of the trance.

“You’re doing so good,” he muttered, bending his head down to press kisses to your neck, “so good.”

JJ’s thrusts got harder, the head of his cock pressing up against that spot inside of you that made you see stars. You cried you, gripping onto him as he kept the pace, his mouth working more marks into your skin.

He didn’t think he could last much longer, not with how tight your pussy clenched around him every time he hit your spot, moaning his name in ear. He pushed his weight onto one arm and slid the other down between the two of you. He lifted his head and watched as your mouth fell open as soon as his fingers made contact with your clit. He rubbed in quick figure eights, working you up to your high.

“O-Oh shit,” you cursed, nails scratching against JJ’s shoulders as your back arched off the bed.

Your whole body was tingling, a tightening feeling coiling in the pit of your stomach. The rhythm of JJ’s thrusts never faltered. The sinful moan that tore through your throat as you came was music to the blonde’s ears.

“Fuck,” JJ gasped as you clenched around him, following you into euphoria with a moan of his own.

Your thighs shook, still hooked around his waist as you came down from your high. Your arms were still wrapped around his shoulders as he buried his face in the crook of your neck. The two of stayed like that for a few minutes, letting your heavy breaths return back to normal.

Eventually, JJ pulled out of you slowly, causing a small hiss to leave your lips. He climbed off the bed and went to dispose of the condom in the bathroom trash quickly. When he entered the room again, you were climbing under the covers, wrapping yourself in the blankets. You had a hazy look in your eyes and a dopey smile on your face.

“Was it everything you thought it would be?” JJ asked as he climbed under the covers beside you.

The two of you faced each other on the bed, heads nuzzled against the pillows. You hummed softly, eyes fluttering closed as exhaustion washed over you.

“Better,” you muttered in response, cracking your eyes open to peak at your best friend once again.

He was staring at you, soft smile adorning his lips as his eyes trailed over your face. He scooted closer to you and wound an arm around your waist. He pulled you against his chest and pressed a chaste kiss to the top of your head. His fingers trailed lazy patterns up and down your spine, lulling you into the best sleep you’d ever have.

“I love you,” JJ whispered, knowing you were deep in dreamland by now.

The blonde didn’t sleep, he just laid there and held you, replaying what just happened in his mind over and over again. He saw you in a different light; a light that he never wanted to burn out. Laying there holding you, butterflies fluttering happily in his stomach, all he could do was smile.

The two of you were definitely going to be having a long conversation on how to move forward when you woke up.

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likeshipsonthesea · 4 years ago

Note

I don’t know if you take requests for nurseydex fics... but if you do the song “omg did she call him baby” by Beth McCarthy screams a heartbroken Nursey when Dex has a girlfriend

i like really can’t do genuine heartbreak but i CAN do angst that ends happy, so here’s my best shot :)

Nursey’s got a red Solo cup in one hand and a plastic champagne flute in the other and it’s sometime after three but before five and he is definitely not thinking about her or him or them together when he looks up between one sip and another to see the telltale blue hair reflecting the murky spotlights of the basement.

Nursey squints. He could be making things up--his brain is nice like that-- but he doesn’t think he’s imagining things. She’s got very distinctive hair, Dex’s--girlfriend. It’d been rather disappointing, actually, the blue hair. The whole thing had been easier to deal with when he’d been picturing some light-haired brunette going for an economics degree who smiled like a mom at soccer practice. Someone who Nursey could reasonably dislike on grounds of, like, predictability.

But no, Dex had to bring home a blue-haired physics major with a nose ring and good taste in music and the ability to out-argue Shitty while polishing off Bitty’s pie, i.e. perfect. Even Lardo couldn’t pretend like she wasn’t awesome for Nursey’s sake. Even Nursey can’t pretend like Amanda isn’t awesome for his own sake. She’s just so--so--

Nursey squints.

So-- making out with some random girl in a blouse at a frat party.

What the fuck.

Nursey is about two margaritas and three years too deep to be dealing with the emotional ramifications of catching the girlfriend of his best friend (who he’s also kind of sort of possibly maybe totally in love with) macking on some consultant for Goldman Sachs or some shit in the basement of arguably one of the worst frats at Samwell. This one doesn’t even have good music, Nursey’s only here to get drunk without the possibility of Dex calling Nursey Patrol and helping Nursey up the stairs and saying nothing about the poetry Nursey spills or the way his hands linger.

(Fuck does Nursey hate Nursey Patrol, fuck does he hate how much he loves it.)

Nursey downs the rest of the champagne flute--which was probably mostly orange juice at this point anyway-- and hands the red Solo cup to a freshman gearing himself up to talk to a cute boy a few feet away and then Nursey gets the fuck out of dodge. He manages to get a better look at the corporate recruiter Amanda is cheating on Dex with (and really, if you’re going to cheat on Dex, you’re really going to pick a chick in a blouse that probably has opinions on the stock market???) and if he hadn’t been sure before, the distinctive tattoo on Amanda’s shoulder proves that it’s really her.

(“Tattoos? Tattoos? I have tattoos.” “I know you do, Nurse.” “They’re really nice tattoos.” “I know they are, Nurse.”)

Emerging from the basement and then the frat house itself is instantly sobering. The chill from winter hasn’t quite left the air at night and Nursey wraps his arms around himself and doesn’t think about how Dex chirped him about not wearing a coat before he’d left. The frat isn’t far away from the Haus, thank god, but it is slightly farther when he turns left instead of right and then has to a backtrack a bit, but he still gets back in under ten minutes and he can still feel his hands, so overall, a win.

Attempting to get into the Haus quietly is a lost cause, given its one thousand year old floor and the fact that a ladybug could fart in the kitchen and wake up the guys in the attic. Still, Nursey gives it the good college try, which is why he’s creeping ridiculously through the living room when the light turns on suddenly and he screams, much to the amusement of Dex, standing in the kitchen doorway.

“Fuck, dude, what the fuck.”

Dex just smirks in that horribly attractive way of his. “How was the Psi-U basement?”

Nursey thinks of blue hair, washed out in the lights, Amanda’s hand on that girl’s cheek, the way Dex smiles when he’s around her. “Fine,” Nursey says, swaying.

The amusement falters and Nursey wishes he could figure out a way to keep the smile on Dex’s face the way Amanda does. Dex takes a step closer. “Are you alright?”

Nursey shakes his head violently and takes a step back, a step farther away. This is the part where he says yes, yes of course Dexy-darling, I’m right as rain, what about you? This is the part where Dex rolls his eyes and loops his arm around Nursey’s waist, his warm side pressed into Nursey’s. The part where they go upstairs, where Nursey writes his best poetry that he’s too embarrassed to write down when he’s sober, where Dex tells him to sleep well and lingers outside the doorway long enough for Nursey’s breathing to slow and then the floor creaks and Nursey knows he’s gone and wishes he’d held on just a little bit longer--

“Nursey, what’s wrong?”

Nursey shakes his head again. He means to say nothing, he means to say, I’m going to bed, he means to-- “Amanda, she--”

The concern turns to alarm. Why can’t Nursey ever make it better? “Is she alright? Did you see her? Is she okay?”

Nursey shakes his head again. He can’t seem to stop doing that. “She’s fine, she--she--” He swallows, and it’s sticky, cloying, citrusy and sweet on the back of his tongue. “She--there was this girl, she-- Amanda, she--”

Dex won’t stop frowning, concern knitting his eyebrows together with three short wrinkles, and Nursey has wanted to smooth them out with his fingertips every time he sees them since sophomore year, and he shouldn’t be doing this, shouldn’t be telling Dex this while he’s drunk, shouldn’t be telling Dex this at all, but he’s Nursey’s friend first and Nursey has to believe he’d tell Dex regardless of the love thing, he must--

“She was kissing some girl. In the Psi-U basement.”

The wrinkles smooth out. The amusement returns. Nursey--he can’t make sense of it over the ringing in his ears. Why is Dex smiling? Did--did Nursey do that?

“Did she look like a lawyer?” he asks, and at Nursey’s confusion clarifies, “The girl Amanda was kissing. Did she look like a lawyer?” Nursey nods dumbly. Dex’s smile only grows. Nursey is so, so confused and also more in love than he’s ever been. “Finally. I just won fifty bucks.”

What the fuck. “What the fuck.”

Dex laughs--laughs. “The girl’s name is Tammy. She graduated last year and moved to Boston. Amanda’s been in love with her forever, and I bet her that she’d get with Tammy before I--” Flush appears high on Dex’s cheeks, the soft pink one that means embarrassment and Nursey imagines would taste like cherry pie against his lips.

Nursey is--still quite a bit drunk. He needs--clarification. “You--you bet your girlfriend that she would get with her friend at a frat party?”

Dex’s nose scrunches up in Nursey’s favorite way--the same way it does when he’s trying to write humanities essays, the reason Nursey always says yes when Dex asks for help. “Girlfriend? Did you think Amanda was my girlfriend?”

Nursey remembers the start, hearing about Amanda every other day, then every day, then it was, sorry I can’t come, I’m meeting Amanda at-- and then one day at Annie’s, a girl with blue hair and a sharp grin yelled Babe! from across the room and planted a kiss on Dex’s cheek, her hand lingering on his shoulder, sipping from his coffee cup, getting him to smile like that--

“Well, yeah.” Nursey’s head is spinning and, for the first time tonight, not from the gin. “Is she--is she not?”

“Oh God, no, she’s so fucking gay, dude.” Laughter twinkles in Dex’s eyes. Nursey is drunker than he’s been since freshmen year of high school when Shitty snuck in some of his dad’s hard liquor and the janitors found them on the roof singing Disney songs at the moon. Dex’s girlfriend is gay. Dex’s girlfriend isn’t his girlfriend. Dex is--is smiling at him like he smiles at his girlfriend who isn’t his girlfriend.

“Oh,” Nursey says, dazed, “chill.”

“Oh wow,” Dex grins, leaning into the doorframe, “I can’t believe you thought--and you thought telling me my girlfriend was cheating on me at 3am while shit-drunk was a good idea?”

Nursey says, “Hey, honesty is important, and I’m not--” He stops. He remembers something. He squints. “Wait. If you bet 50 bucks on Amanda getting with Tammy, who did Amanda bet you would get with?”

The cherry pie blush is back. Nursey takes an absent-minded step forward. The room feels so much lighter now that Dex’s girlfriend isn’t cheating on him. The distance between them feels so much sillier now that Dex doesn’t have a girlfriend.

“Ah, well.” Dex rubs at the back of his neck, all country bumpkin sheepish to ask his sweetheart to the dance, and--and--

“I’m the sweetheart,” Nursey realizes with the kind of crystal clarity only afforded by the most copious amounts of alcohol.

Dex’s eyebrows furrow, those sweet little wrinkles appearing between them, and Nursey takes two long strides forward and presses his thumb into them. Dex goes cross-eyed trying to watch, but moves his eyes to meet Nursey’s after a moment.

Nursey grins, likely a bit sloppy from the gin, but he can’t find it in himself to care at the moment. “I’m the sweetheart,” he repeats, beaming.

Dex tries to repress the smile at his lips. “You’re not a sweetheart.”

“Yes I am,” Nursey sings, listing forwards. “You like me.”

“You’re an asshole.” Dex’s smile grows. Nursey watches its progress and sways.

“They’re not mutually exclusive,” he says, tracking the pink lips as they spread, revealing teeth and--and tongue and--

“I hate that you can still say mutually exclusive when you’re this drunk.”

“I’m not that drunk.”

“Yeah?”

“Mhmm. See, I’ll prove it.”

“How do you plan on--”

If Dex’s mouth weren’t so preoccupied, he might say that the taste on Nursey’s tongue is a good indication that he is in fact fairly tipsy, but as it is--well. He’s got other things to do.

(Amanda asserts that they tied since it happened on the same night and only pays $25. Tammy throws in five more and a condom and they call it even. Nursey kisses away Dex’s protest and pockets the condom, much to Amanda’s amusement. Turns out, she’s even cooler when she isn’t dating the love of Nursey’s life.)

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foramomentonly · 3 years ago

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3.08 Alex Meta

I don't usually do meta and maybe all of this will be a very, "Duh, Nat!" moment for you. But 3.08 was a huge Alex episode for me. I feel like I understand him on a totally new and deeper level, and I'm seeing a direct character line from S1 and to some of the questions and issues many of us had in S2.

Spoilers for RNM 3.08 below.

As I might have said ten thousand times previously, I relate to Alex a lot. His compartmentalization, his emotional distance, his seeming inability to correctly identify and name a damn feeling. Like, same, man.

But 3.08, in my opinion, completely blew that all up. Because Alex is pretty clear in his story: he has all the emotions, he just no longer feels safe acting on them. And when I think about Alex in the flashbacks we've had, that totally tracks. Teen Alex is a walking ball of emotions and he is not afraid to act on them. His whole vibe is "pissed at the world," which, valid. He's angry, so he punches Kyle. He's moved by Michael and his situation, so he offers to help. He unapologetically feels and acts on those feelings. He's in love, so he keeps seeing Michael even after the events of the shed (Rest on a Bloody Bed of Rusty Nails, Jesse Manes). Alex is brave and bold with his emotions and even though Jesse and others are no doubt giving him hell for it, he doesn't stop.

Cut to S1 Alex, who vacillates between wildly passionate, closed off, angry, ice king. He pushes and pulls with Michael and we don't really know why and it's an emotional whiplash that carries over into at least the beginning of S2. I always understood this as Alex not knowing his own feelings, acting in the moment on what he wants and later talking himself out of it, denying himself out of fear.

But that's not it, is it? Alex is fully aware of his feelings, apparently, he just doesn't see acting on them as safe anymore. He gets home and he runs into Michael and everything, all that love and desire is still there and his impulse is to act on it and he does, but his experiences have taught him that his emotions are dangerous. And if all he's ever done is try protect Michael, he does that by trying to lock his feelings for Michael away, pull back when he loses control and acts on them. He's still learning how to do this in S1, and that pull toward Michael is strong (cosmic, almost?) and I think that's where that back and forth comes in.

None of this is that new, though. What's new to me is the understanding that hiding/feeling/repressing emotions isn't instinctual for Alex! It's learned behavior, and not even from his time with Jesse, but this experience in war.

And let's talk about that story, huh? A lot of us assumed (myself included) that Alex's rigidity, his tendency to bulldoze over other people's boundaries and take charge is born of stubbornness, of believing he's always right, that he must be in control to feel safe. But what I heard Alex tell me in his story is fuck, no, he's knows how wrong he can be, he's failed on a massive level already, caused hurt and pain to himself and others. He's not a hero. He's a mess. (We all knew that. But a lot of us operated on the idea that Alex didn't know that about himself.) Everything he does is to avoid causing further harm and chaos in the future.

Obviously, he still does. I don't want to discount that. And he's still accountable for it. But I think it's significant that Alex isn't operating from a position of superiority after all (I mean, he probably still is a little, he's Alex, his class privileges are still there), he's operating more from a place of knowing how completely and utterly he's fucked up before and wanting desperately to avoid that in the future. And to him, a man who lives his whole life in extremes (fucking drama queen, I mean lol), the way to avoid that happening is to go in the total opposite direction. To push down his natural emotions, ignore his instincts because they can't be trusted (Which, hey, maybe that's why he's got Kyle on speed dial every time he has to make a decision!), and strategize the shit out of everything. And it scares the fuck out of him that Michael, the person he most wants to avoid experiencing harm or being put in danger, acts on feeling and instinct and all the things that Alex believes caused his own epic failure that cost literal life and limb.

I used to think Alex and Michael were opposites, one a live wire of emotion and instinct, and the other the keeper of approximately three feelings and he hates them all. But I think now that they are extremely alike. They're both driven by emotion, instinct, heart, but Alex has forced himself to ignore all that and think like a computer, and Michael still lives his life by his them, still inherently trusts them. I've always loved and admired that about him, and I think that's part of what Alex loves, too, even though it scares him.

There's a whole nother meta's worth of stuff in the episode of how Alex's journey to trusting and working with Michael as an equal parallels Liz's storyline with Rosa (Liz and Alex are so alike, I die!) and yet another about the phenomenal pattern of growth with see from Malex, and especially Alex, throughout the episode. For a literal, step-by-step breakdown, ask the incomparable @adiwriting very nicely, who went OFF in the best way about it last night in our DMs. Like she could draw you a diagram.

This episode just gave us so much. Damn. It wasn't perfect, of course, and I would have liked to see Alex and Malex's development and growth happen over the course of the season, not jammed a single episode. But I love what we got and what it's taught me is I didn't know shit about Alex, but I had a lot of fun learning.

End meta.

#alex manes #roswell nm #roswell nm meta #alex manes meta #malex #season 3 spoilers #spoilers #meta

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yandere-sins · 4 years ago

Note

hello!! may i request prompt 23 “I’m so happy you finally wanted to take a picture with me! They can go right next to all of the ones of you sleeping.” with deku? thank you!💓

Of course!! That one works so well for Deku, thanks for requesting :D I decided for a bit less scary yan this time hahaha Enjoy!

Photos - “I’m so happy you finally wanted to take a picture with me! They can go right next to all of the ones of you sleeping.”

»»———————— ♡ ————————««

At first, you had been very nervous when you were invited to the get-together by your new college class. Who knew what kind of weird strangers you were sharing the lessons with, so did you really want to go on a weekend hike with them? There were enough horrifying stories on the internet about people getting lost or murdered, which didn’t give you the courage to roll with it.

Even if you thought nature was great, conquering it with a bunch of strangers you only met a week before, probably wouldn’t be the greatest idea of your life. But you didn’t want to be the only one to sit it out and have the other’s form friendships and connections while you were at home being unproductive. Even less you wanted to regret your decision later. This was college! You were all young adults! It was time to have fun and be merry!

That’s why you agreed to it.

And honestly? It was better than expected. Everyone seemed very careful on the first day to not step on each other’s foot. Still, by the end of it, people were joking around and laughing about stories. You quickly made connections with some boys and girls when you were grouped up with them to collect firewood for the great campfire that was going to burn on the first night of your hike. They all seemed friendly and welcoming, and you had a lot of fun with them.

Very quickly, over the next few days, you found out about good sheep and bad sheep in the group. It was simply impossible for everyone to get along, but you were glad that others had your back, making you forget about the negativity some people spread around. Before you knew it, it was already Sunday, and though you laughed at the few who very quickly got drunk and made out, you were glad for the friends you had gathered around you.

So much so that when someone suggested taking pictures together on the last night, you jumped onto the idea, running around to make additional memories with all the friends you made. It was already getting pretty late, some returning to their tents to rest up for the night (and some to have extra fun with students they got along too well, in your opinion), so you hurried to catch everyone before they went to bed. You wouldn’t see them in the morning where you’d go your separate ways again, so it had to be before that.

“Izuku!” you called out as you ran up to your new friend, immediately slowing down as you saw he was busy talking to someone else. But without a second of hesitation in him, he turned to you, smiling widely. You apologized for the interruption, and Izuku quickly wrapped up his conversation to dedicate himself to you.

“What’s up?” he grinned, and you immediately felt at ease, having feared you might have come off as rude. The last thing you wanted was to upset him since he had been your strong pillar this weekend. Talking to him was so easy and comfortable; you two had stayed up for hours talking at night and then continued while you were hiking. Even walking in silence side by side had been nothing less but comfortable, and you were glad that you caught him one last time before the end of the get-together. Not that you feared you two would lose sight of each other afterwards. However, not knowing how busy your lives would be once the studies became serious, you didn’t want to miss having something to remember your time by.

“Someone suggested making pictures with each other, and I just had to come and ask you!”

Immediately, you saw his posture straighten, smile only widening at your suggestion, while you fiddled with your phone. Who knows why, but you had been scared he would say no, which you’d have to accept, but would regret either way. Perhaps, there were budding feelings you had for him that you denied so far, and that’s why it would have hurt so much to be rejected. But you breathed a sigh of relief when he replied with a chipper, “That’s a great idea!”

You two quickly got into position as you turned on your phone’s face camera. Boldly, Izuku put his arm around your hips as if you two had been friends forever. You still remembered how timid he had been at first, but you quickly came to admire him for his courage and that he would stand up for you and your friends when you were confronted with one of the rotten eggs of the group. It truly made him look like a hero, his true colors showing, and you admired him for his strength yet modesty.

“Say cheese!” you chanted, both of you flashing your biggest smile before the camera went off. “Oh, that’s cute,” you beamed as you gave the photo a quick look to make sure it came out alright. “Let’s take another one,” Izuku suggested, grinning at you, both of you feeling giddy.

Quickly, you got back into position, leaning into his side and readying your camera. However, when you snapped the picture, you felt him hunch over and witnessed in the camera as his lips laid down against your cheek. Stunned, you looked on as the picture disappeared, Izuku’s gaze firmly stuck on you as you heard him whisper, “Another one?”

Reaching up to touch your cheek, you leaned away, and his hold around your waist loosened, giving you space. “Was that too much?” he asked, his shoulders sinking while he looked at you apologetically. “I didn’t mean to--”

“No!” you were quick to wave it off. “I- I was just surprised.”

“Oh...”

For a moment, you two stood there like ordered and not picked up before you could muster a single chuckle, shaking your head. Next thing you knew, both of you burst out into laughs and giggles. Yes, it was just like that with Izuku. It was easy. It made you feel at peace. As if you had known him forever, even though it had only been this last weekend. You had probably told him more about you than even your parents knew, and you felt like he had been very open about his past and present as well.

“You don’t have to keep that picture if you don’t want to, but would you mind sending them to me?”

That wasn’t a question he had to ask twice, as you quickly nodded, typing away a message with the photos attached to him. He was the first chat that popped up in your log, your conversations going way beyond mouth to mouth and having continued in your messages, so it was a matter of seconds until you had sent the files over. “It wasn’t uncomfortable...” you mumbled as you saw the picture of him kissing your cheek once more.

“Hm?” he replied, seemingly not having caught your small voice. “Oh, nothing!” you quickly brushed it off, suddenly losing the courage to repeat it and reveal some more how you felt.

Izuku didn’t probe further, nice enough to give you space in the matter, instead fishing for his phone, which was buzzing as it received your texts. “Ah, it’s so cute,” he laughed as he opened the pictures, a tinge of red falling over his cheeks. “I’m glad,” you mumbled, unable to keep the smile away from your face as you saw him so happy. Heat rose to your own face as well, and some of the buds in your stomach were blooming up as your fantasy ran wild. Perhaps this was the start of something special. And you were hopeful that you both felt the same way.

“It’s perfect for the collection,” he sighed, satisfied.

“Collection?” you asked, wondering if you had missed something. Did the group gather pictures to make a collection out of them?

“Yes!” Izuku peeked up, shining brightly. Your prince charming always shone brighter than the sun, in your opinion, but he managed to really string you along with his enthusiasm, making you feel excited as well. “I’m so happy you finally wanted to take a picture with me! They can go right next to all of the ones of you sleeping. Although...”

Wait. Sleeping? Pictures of you?

“This one is special, I’ll have to frame it.”

“What do you--”

You wanted to ask him about it when Izuku turned around, humming happily as he walked off, too deep in thought to even say ‘good night’ to you. You looked after him, flabbergasted, trying to make sense out of what he said. What pictures? What did he mean?

Days later, you found out exactly what Izuku had been talking about at this bizarre end of the trip you two had taken.

When he sent you a picture back, labeling it, “Perfect, isn’t it?”

Zooming in, you saw what must have been hundreds, if not thousands of pictures stuck to a wall, every one of them showing you. Some of you at your old school, some where you were out with your friends, some of you at home, in bed, getting dressed... And in the middle of it all, framed and polished, was the one where he kissed you, red marker scribbles on the glass, saying,

My Darling ♥

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heloisedaphnebrightmore · 4 years ago

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Important asset [Billy Russo x Reader]

Title: Important asset Pairing: Billy Russo x Female!Reader Word count: 3k Published: 22 April 2021 Author: Heloise Daphne Brightmore Notes: My first Billy Russo fic, I hope it's not that bad, I'm still trying to get a hold of his character :) Summary: [x] Being a former military personal gives you the opportunity to work for Billy’s company. Becoming a very important part of the company provides you with an even closer relationship with your boss. However, he seems to be deliberately dancing on your nerves, increasing your already built-up frustration.

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Working for Anvil felt like a safe place. After serving your country for years, coming back from your last tour turned out to be more difficult than you could have anticipated. Protecting important personals and working as security wasn’t something you wished to do, but after starting the job, working along with people who have been through what you have, your view of the company has changed. The job was different, but the people you worked with have given you more support than anyone, including your family, friends or your therapist for that matter.

Joining Anvil wasn’t easy, the requirement process raised some issues that you had to overcome. The physical part didn’t offer any difficulty, but the mental exam seemed to present some obstacles. It wasn’t until your second try that you have been approved and joined the team. That was when you met Mr. Russo, CEO and founder of Anvil. He was just as handsome as you have heard, and he had a way with words. He was confident and knew just how to use his charm. Even if you wanted to deny your sudden interest in him, you couldn’t have.

It seemed that even if he didn’t look at you as a woman, he certainly found your abilities interesting. You didn’t just become one with the team, a crucial member, but also became one of Billy’s most important assets. Having both good communications skills and excellent combat skills meant your worth in Billy’s eyes have grown and provided a great deal of opportunity for you to stay beside him. Officially you weren’t an assistant, but unofficially, Billy liked to give you a nice amount of work, keeping you close by from early morning to late afternoon or evening, sometimes past 10pm.

“Mr. Russo,” you called out to him as you walked behind him in a narrow corridor of the Anvil headquarters. Billy turned around, adjusting his tie with a confident smirk across his face. “I heard you were looking for me,” you added as you finally arrived beside him, glancing up at his handsome features, looking very professional in his expensive suit. You wanted to look feminine and pretty, instead of being dirty and sweaty, wearing a pair of tracksuits, but sometimes your work required you to look more worn out than you wished to be. He had a certain aura that kept pulling you towards him, but as confident as you were in your abilities to protect your country and your people, you were just as uncertain about your appearance when you appeared in front of Billy.

“Yes, I have. Care to explain why I can't reach you on your phone?” He asked, his features unimpressed with your lack of availability.

“I was training, I can’t possibly bring my phone with me everywhere,” you replied frowning, but you quickly adjusted your expressions, before he could have scolded you. It was clear that he wasn’t happy with your reply, but he dismissed it after all.

“Come to my office at 1700 hours. I have a couple things to discuss with you,” he replied in an authoritative manner.

“I have to train the new recruits at 4,” you explained, but he just shook his head.

“Ask someone to replace you,” he stated firmly, accepting no objection. But you took your job very seriously and even though Billy was your boss, often you found yourself going against his decisions just to spite him.

“I can’t do that,” you stated, lips pursed to emphasise your objection. “There’s no one to cover me,” you added. His firm stance and sharp inhale reassured you that he was anything but happy with your answer. He took a step forward, forcing you to take a step back and collide with the wall behind you. Your chest felt as though it was a small box, containing only a small portion of oxygen, its lack of tightened your throat, starting your heart off in a dangerous pace, pounding hard against your ribcage. Billy’s presence always made you feel as though you couldn’t breathe. A simple gaze in your direction, a confident grin, his low, deep voice calling your name made you weak at the knees and left your mind wandering to paths you should have never gone to, causing thousands of butterflies to erupt in your belly.

“I’m your boss and I can change your schedule whenever I want to. I want to see you in my office at 1700 sharp, or else—” he didn’t finish the end of his sentence, but you were sure his ideas were entirely different from yours.

“Or else—?” It escaped your mouth involuntarily, receiving a low growl from Billy, a threatening aura, still it didn’t frighten you, if anything it encouraged you further. “I think we both know you will not fire me, Mr. Russo. I’m a very important asset to your company. I am a very dedicated employee and therefore I will try to adjust my schedule to fit your request, but I cannot promise anything, unless you personally can provide someone to take over from me,” you replied in a challenging manner, earning a questioningly raised brow from Billy. Trying to read his face you couldn’t decide if he was actually considering helping you or he was planning how to murder you in the spot.

A heavy sigh left his lungs, but he didn’t back away. “I will send Simon to cover you,” he said between gritted teeth.

“That is absolutely brilliant, I’m so glad we are on the same page,” you exclaimed with a wide grin across your face as you turned around to leave the man behind. However, before you could have left, he grabbed your arm and pulled you back against him, your palms landing on his hard chest, feeling every inch of each fine muscle under your touch.

“Pay attention to your attitude because it has gotten out of hands recently and you are standing on a very fine line,” he whispered, his breath tickling your cheeks. Indeed, you have been rather free with your words and actions around Billy, and you knew you were playing with fire, but it seemed that was the only way to get his attention.

“I might be pushing some boundaries, but my only intention is for the company to work effectively, to produce people that do their tasks efficiently meanwhile wearing Anvil’s name with pride. If I neglect my duties and ignore my job, even if it’s for your request, what use am I to the company?” you asked with a certain pride. Whilst your intention was to object to Billy once again, to be somewhat bratty, every word that left your lips were true. Anvil has given you more than you could have ever wished for and not even Billy could stop you from making this company one of the most well-working organisations.

Billy took a sharp inhale, trying to decide whether you were just being spoilt once again, because you were indeed aware of your own worth, or if the company really took priority in your eyes. His nod reassured you of the latter as he let go of your arm.

“I like the way you are thinking, but it doesn’t excuse your attitude. You are an important asset to the company, but not irreplaceable. By the time you come to see me in the afternoon, try to get rid of it,” he spoke sternly, before he shook his head and offered you a cocky grin as he turned around and left you in the corridor. You couldn’t stop the tiny smile from appearing in the corner of your lips, his expression reassured you that you were anything but invisible in his eyes.

As you were leading a shooting session for your team, Billy interrupted your practice, clearing his throat whilst leaning against the doorframe, watching your people. You looked at your watch, afraid of being late, but according to your time, you weren’t even anywhere near the time you were supposed to be in his office.

“Keep practising,” you instructed them as you walked back to Billy, whose arms were folded in front of his chest, his eyes following every step you took towards him. “Is everything okay?” you asked as you stopped in front of him.

“Hmm,” he replied with a simple hum and a single nod. He seemed to have something on his mind, and you were sure he would soon voice his opinion. Biting his lip, he grimaced slightly. “Your team needs more practice,” he added nonchalantly. Your eyes widened and you quickly turned around to check on the targets. Indeed, there were some errors, but you were overall satisfied with their performance, they were former members of the US Armed Forces after all. Inhaling sharply, you turned back to him, staring at his expressionless face.

“Is this really why you came here?” You asked with a questioningly raised brow.

“I was just wondering how useful you are to the company since you have been walking around voicing your importance. Just like you did in the morning, if I recall correctly,” he shrugged casually.

“Let me see if I understand. After all I have done for the company and for you, now you are checking on my people and my progress, questioning how much we are worth to your goddamn company?” You hissed in anger. Billy seemed to be on a roll attempting to piss you off at any given time. Usually, you could keep your act together, but he has done nothing but insulted you that day and he was very close to reaching your limits. You stared into his eyes and in the lowest, most threatening tone you could manage, you continued. “Listen to me Russo, I can take a lot, I’m quite a resilient person, but I’m very close to walking out of here and never coming back. If you would like me to leave then say it, but if not and you would like me to keep working for you, then let me do my job and leave me alone for the rest of the day,” you exhaled sharply and after a deadly gaze directed at your boss, you turned away and joined your team. Your blood was boiling from the amount of anger he could bring out in you, as if he found your frustration entertaining. Although you expected him to come after you and give you a monologue about humbling yourself, by the time you looked back towards the entrance, he was long gone.

It was already 5pm and Simon was nowhere to be found. You instructed the new recruits to take a 5-minute break from the exercises you have given them as you rocked from one leg to the other trying to calm yourself, slowly exhaling and inhaling. Preparing for the scolding you were about to receive from Billy, your blood pressure had risen. You groaned as you saw Simon run through the door, heavily apologising for his lateness. Shaking your head, you walked up to him and instructed him about the details of the recruits’ further training. By the time you were supposed to be in Billy’s office, you were jogging across the narrow corridors of Anvil, trying to minimise the nagging Billy was about to give you for not arriving in time.

“You are late,” you heard his voice as you opened the door, grimacing at the harsh tone. Billy didn’t even look up from his desk, his eyes were attached to the paperwork he was signing off.

“Not my fault,” you added, walking up to the table and sitting down across Billy.

“I told you to be precise,” he groaned, unhappy about your lateness.

“Next time send someone who actually appears in time,” you retorted, feeling fed up with his continued scolding.

“Once again you have that attitude,” he cleared his throat in frustration.

“Russo!” You shot up from your chair, placing your hands on his paperwork, staring straight into his eyes. “I’m aware that I have a slight problem with my attitude, but I don’t think it’s fair that you blame me for something I had no say in. You have asked Simon to replace me, still at 5pm sharp I was still in the training hub alone with the recruits, because he was late,” you replied firmly.

“I don’t think I have asked for an excuse, so why do I have to listen?” He asked with a deep frown, slowly standing up from his chair, his stance projecting authority. But at that moment, you couldn’t care less. Your blood was rushing through your veins, your built-up frustration threatening to reveal itself. As if Billy’s mere purpose was to dance on your nerves. And he was successful.

“Billy,” you called his first name with clenched teeth. You have gotten used to calling him Mr. Russo or Russo, even though you were close to each other. However recently he has been deliberately annoying you and you couldn’t take it anymore. Indeed, you wanted to get some kind of reaction out of him with your brattiness, but receiving the same attitude didn’t seem that entertaining. You knew you were supposed to be professional when you were working, even though he made it his mission to piss you off, but you just lost your self-control. “I have done nothing for this company but work my ass off to help you. When you asked, I had to be at two even three places at the same time. I have no life, because every single free time and day off I’m supposed to be having, I have to spend here to help you. I don’t mind, because I love working here and I want to make this company a better place. But you are the one talking about my attitude, even though I have never asked for anything in return?! Have I ever asked for a raise even if you dumped hours of work on me? You keep me here from early morning to late evening and I’ve never once complained, still you dare to talk about my attitude? Please, tell me what your problem is with me, because recently I feel like it’s your mission to get on my nerves. At this point the only thing I can think of is that you want me to quit because that’s the kind of hostility that comes across from you,” you huffed releasing all your frustration on your boss.

“You—” he wanted to speak up, but you didn’t let him. It was your time to talk, and you didn’t even give him a chance to object.

“No, I’m speaking,” you interrupted him, earning a sharp inhale from the man. “I understand that I’m only a mere subordinate, and I know I should not have the attitude that I do take on sometimes, but I am still a human and I don’t have to deal with your moodiness on a daily basis,” you hissed. “Tell me honestly, is it your mission to get me to quit? Because at this point you are very close to forcing me to resign and—” you had no way to finish the sentence as Billy grabbed the back of your neck and pulled your lips against his, earning a moan from you. He only let go of you for a second to get around the table, his movements quick as though he was a lion hunting down his prey. He attached his lips to yours once again, pushing you up on the table and positioning himself between your thighs. He sneaked his arm around your waist, pulling you closer to him, his other hand firmly holding you close to him by the back of your neck, wanting nothing but to reduce the proximity between the two of you.

“Do you ever shut up?” He asked, breathing heavily against your lips. “I hear nothing but your continuous yapper,” he groaned as he laid his forehead against yours, massaging random patterns on your thigh. “Why on earth do you think I have given you so much job to do, you dumb woman? Can you be any more oblivious? I didn’t just dump all those random tasks on you and left you to do them, did I? I stayed behind with you, isn’t that, right?” he asked through gritted teeth. “You really know how to get on my nerves, and this certainly isn’t how I imagined this to come out, but you make it impossible for me to keep my cool,” he inhaled slowly, forcefully pulling you closer to him as he stood between your legs, making you moan at the contact. “I’m going to give you two options now,” he stated as he took a step back, giving you space to think. You can walk out that door, act like nothing happened and we will go back to being a boss and an employee. Or you can stay, and we continue what we started. But then there’s no turning back. I don’t just let go of what’s mine,” for a moment you ran the options through a logical part of your mind, that screamed for you to walk out the door. But you couldn’t possibly listen to the voice when you could finally be Billy’s after you have done so much for the man you longed for.

You grabbed his belt and pulled him between your legs, whispering against his lips. “Close that door,” Billy’s jaw clenched and without a second to waste he stood by the door, locking it behind him and getting back to you in haste, capturing your lips with his hands exploring every part of your body.

“So, have I become irreplaceable now?” You asked with a proud, overly confident grin as his hands tried to remove your shirt impatiently. His eyes darkened at your words, his hands stopping mid-air.

“Don’t get cocky with me,” he groaned, grabbing your jaw and connecting your lips once again, trying to get you out of your clothes. Whatever Billy called you for was long forgotten for the rest of the evening, you were busier with each other’s company.

Notes: If you enjoyed reading this little piece, please don’t forget to leave a like, comment and reblog. Your opinion matters and gives us motivation. Thank you ^^

If you enjoy my stories, please consider donating and supporting me on Ko-fi. Of course, it’s completely your choice, I will continue updating for free anyway :) Thank you <3

Taglist is in a reblog from now on.

#billy russo #billy russo x reader #ben barnes #ben barnes x reader #anvil #billy russo x reader fanfiction #billy russo fanfiction

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bloody-bee-tea · 4 years ago

Text

Request

Since this is over 6k you can also read it here on AO3

Ever since Wei Wuxian ran away with Lan Wangji and Jiang Yanli started her own life with Jin Zixuan, Jiang Family dinners have become something of a rarity.

It’s not that Jiang Cheng is particularly upset about that, even though it does sting to know that his parents don’t know what to do with him on his own, but mostly he’s just glad that he doesn’t have to subject himself to endless hours of berating every other week.

But the dinners being a rarity doesn’t mean they don’t happen, even though it’s only twice a year now.

And that time is swiftly approaching now, as Jiang Cheng’s phone so kindly tells him.

“Fuck,” he mutters under his breath as the reminder pops up, one week in advance so he has a chance to prepare for it, and he wishes he could just pretend he forgot.

But that would only make it worse, he knows that from experience.

“What’s wrong?” Nie Mingjue asks from behind him, slinging an arm around his middle and pressing a kiss to his shoulder.

“It’s just—” Jiang Cheng starts but he trails off, unsure what to do.

He doesn’t want to keep secrets from Nie Mingjue, but if he tells him then he’ll want to tag along again, or he’ll be especially attentive afterwards and Jiang Cheng wants neither of those things.

He doesn’t want to subject Nie Mingjue to his parents and he doesn’t want to be coddled by him, either.

The insecurity makes him hesitate a second too long, because Nie Mingjue sighs slightly as he hugs Jiang Cheng closer.

“Your parents?” Nie Mingjue accurately guesses and Jiang Cheng manages to nod.

Nie Mingjue hasn’t met them yet; Jiang Cheng was perfectly content to keep him from his parents forever—or however long their relationship lasted—but it seems like fate is working against him.

Jiang Cheng is proven right, when his phone chimes again, this time with a message from his mother.

We heard you’re in a relationship. We expect you to bring him.

There’s no hello or any nice word, except this and Jiang Cheng already feels like burrowing in his blankets and never resurfacing.

“It’s family dinner, next week,” Jiang Cheng finally gets out, turning around in Nie Mingjue’s hold, so he can hide in his chest.

It’s the next best thing to his blankets after all.

“They expect you to come, too,” he whispers and feels how Nie Mingjue goes rigid.

“I’m going to meet them?” he carefully asks, and Jiang Cheng knows what he thinks about this.

He knows that Nie Mingjue has a thousand different things to say to his parents, even though he only knows them from stories Jiang Cheng or Nie Huaisang told him, and the picture he got wasn’t pretty.

Jiang Cheng wouldn’t go so far as to say that it’s not accurate, but still.

“I can tell them you don’t have time?” Jiang Cheng tries, and even though he would do it to protect Nie Mingjue he knows that he would just open himself up for more hurtful words and accusations from his parents.

“No way. I’m coming,” Nie Mingjue immediately gives back, pressing a lingering kiss to Jiang Cheng’s hair. “I’m not letting you go in there alone.”

He never likes letting Jiang Cheng meet his parents, Jiang Cheng knows that, but so far Nie Mingjue never got to do anything about it. But this is about to change, it seems.

“It sounds like I’m going into a lion’s den,” Jiang Cheng says with a shaking chuckle, and it’s a weak enough try to dissipate the tension in Nie Mingjue that it doesn’t even work.

“I’d say it’s worse than even that,” Nie Mingjue seriously tells him and then pushes Jiang Cheng away, just enough to be able to look him in the face.

“Just say the word and we’re not going at all. We can cite a family emergency on my side or something. You don’t have to go.”

Jiang Cheng appreciates the offer, but it’s not a permanent solution. This might get him out of this one dinner, but the next one after that will be worse than ever, Jiang Cheng already knows that from experience.

“I kinda do have to go,” Jiang Cheng tells him with a grimace. “But you don’t have to. There’s no reason for you to go at all,�� he then tries, because he really does want to spare Nie Mingjue this and if Jiang Cheng is being honest he wants to spare himself this as well.

Nie Mingjue might have heard some stories about Jiang Cheng’s parents, but the truth is so much worse and Jiang Cheng fears that Nie Mingjue might look differently at him once he knows just how little his parents really think of him.

Nie Mingjue would of course insist that that could never happen, but he doesn’t know Jiang Cheng’s parents yet. They can make everyone hate Jiang Cheng and he is in no rush to have that happen with Nie Mingjue.

“My heart, you’re not going alone. Especially not if they expect me to show up with you. We’re going,” Nie Mingjue decisively says and Jiang Cheng has to blink back some tears.

For all that he fears going there, it will be nice to have someone by his side for once.

~*~*~

Jiang Cheng has a death grip on Nie Mingjue’s hand.

“I’m here,” Nie Mingjue reassures him, not for the first time this evening, and he lifts their hands to press a kiss to the back of Jiang Cheng’s. “I’ve got you.”

Jiang Cheng nods, but he doesn’t feel reassured at all. He feels like he’s going to vibrate out of his skin, he’s so nervous and he’s certain that he will throw up if he even so much as takes one bite of their dinner.

Maybe he should do it, too. It would get them out of dinner early. His parents hate messes after all.

But then again they still insist on seeing him regularly and according to his parents Jiang Cheng is the biggest mess they ever produced.

“It’s just—” Jiang Cheng says and brings them to a stop mere feet away from the door to his parents’ house. “It will be bad,” Jiang Cheng says, also not for the first time this evening. “And I know you insist on saying that yes, you know, but you don’t. Mingjue, seriously, you don’t. It will be so much worse than you expect. And you won’t be safe from it, either. Laying it on me gets boring after a while and they will turn to you, I’m sure of it,” Jiang Cheng rambles, and he doesn’t understand how Nie Mingjue can still look so calmly at him.

“It will be okay, my heart,” Nie Mingjue tells him when Jiang Cheng runs out of words. “I’m here, and I’ve got you, and I’m not going anywhere. We’ll see this through together, okay?” he says and Jiang Cheng can do nothing but nod.

Nie Mingjue doesn’t yet understand what he’s about to walk into but his view of Jiang Cheng and his family will surely change after this.

Jiang Cheng is not looking forward to that but he wants to get this evening behind him, so he drags Nie Mingjue to the door.

Jiang Cheng realizes that this evening will even be worse than he anticipated when his father opens the door with a smile.

“Finally,” Jiang Fengmian says and barely spares Nie Mingjue a glance. “Come in, come in,” he then ushers them inside before quickly walking away.

Jiang Cheng fights the urge to turn around and run away.

“That didn’t seem so bad,” Nie Mingjue carefully says, and Jiang Cheng presses his lips together.

“He’s drunk. Which means they have already been fighting,” he shortly gives back and that only means one thing.

This evening will be a complete disaster.

But it’s too late to run now, so Jiang Cheng leads Nie Mingjue into the house. His mother is nowhere to be seen, for which Jiang Cheng is grateful. It’s a small reprieve but he’ll take what he can get.

When his father doesn’t come back, Jiang Cheng tugs Nie Mingjue along to the dining room. His mother is already sitting at the table, glass of wine in her hand, and Jiang Cheng suspects that it’s not the first one either.

It doesn’t really make a difference, it just means that they will skip the pleasantries and go straight to berating Jiang Cheng.

“You’re late,” his mother predictably says, even though Jiang Cheng made sure to ring the bell on the dot.

But he can never get it right and he wonders when he’ll stop trying.

“Who is this?” Yu Ziyuan asks, eyeing Nie Mingjue up and down.

“Nie Mingjue, my boyfriend. You told me to bring him, remember?” Jiang Cheng gives back, and he reaches out for Nie Mingjue’s hand.

“I thought you were dating someone respectable,” Yu Ziyuan says over her glass. “Not someone like—him.”

Jiang Cheng presses his lips together. He knows that his mother only sees Nie Mingjue’s muscles and the tattoo that peeks out from his collar and of course she would form her opinion solely based on that. It doesn’t matter what kind of person Nie Mingjue is, or how smart or dumb he is, in his mother’s eyes he is already lacking.

“I’m sorry,” Jiang Cheng whispers to Nie Mingjue, who doesn’t seem to be too happy, but he just shrugs it off for now and squeezes Jiang Cheng’s hand.

“It’s nice to meet you,” Nie Mingjue greets Yu Ziyuan, because at least he has manners, but Yu Ziyuan doesn’t even bother to reply to him.

“Go fetch your father, dinner is getting cold,” she tells him and narrows his eyes at Jiang Cheng when he hesitates.

He doesn’t want to leave Nie Mingjue alone with his mother.

Before he can make a decision on what to do, his father steps back into the room, seemingly surprised that they haven’t started yet.

“I thought you already started?”

“We were waiting for you,” Yu Ziyuan says with a pointed look and Jiang Cheng silently watches as Jiang Fengmian’s face falls.

He always tries to get out of family dinner like this, and Jiang Cheng wonders when he’ll finally realize that Yu Ziyuan will not let him.

“Sit,” Jiang Cheng lowly says to Nie Mingjue, who finally seems as unhappy as he should be, having to stay with Jiang Cheng’s family.

They manage to go through the first course in absolute silence, but Jiang Cheng knows that it’s just the calm before the storm. At least one person will have left the table before dessert.

“How’s work?” Jiang Fengmian asks Jiang Cheng as they just dig into the main course and Jiang Cheng tenses.

“I’m still finishing my master’s degree,” he carefully reminds him and Jiang Fengmian seems surprised.

“Oh, right. Not everyone can skip a year and finish their studies early,” he casually says and Jiang Cheng clenches his jaw.

“In a field that has no substantial security,” Yu Ziyuan chimes in and Jiang Cheng tries to make himself as small as he can in his chair.

Nie Mingjue throws him a questioning glance but Jiang Cheng lightly shakes his head, urging him not to speak at all.

“There’s room for new inventions and development. It suits Wei Wuxian much better. And do I have to remind you that he got a rather well-paying job? Unlike other people at the table here,” Jiang Fengmian says with a pointed look at Jiang Cheng who grinds his teeth together.

There’s no use in reminding his father that he is still in university, and that he isn’t able to work full-time yet, because Jiang Cheng has been trying that ever since Wei Wuxian finished his studies.

It just never seems to stick with his father.

“And what is it you do—?” Jiang Fengmian asks with a questioning look at Nie Mingjue who already seems ready to blow up in his face.

“Nie Mingjue, father,” Jiang Cheng supplies the name and he has no hopes that Jiang Fengmian will actually remember it for longer than a minute.

“Nie Mingjue, right,” he mutters, a small frown on his face.

“You don’t seem the type to have a degree,” Yu Ziyuan cuts in and Jiang Cheng bristles with that implication.

“Mother!” he hisses but Nie Mingjue puts a calming hand to his thigh.

“I do have a degree, actually,” Nie Mingjue calmly tells them. “But I don’t work in that field. I own a chain of gym studios.”

“So you are a jock,” Yu Ziyuan says with a nod as if she didn’t expect anything else and Jiang Cheng fights the urge to yell in her face.

Nie Mingjue is as far from being a jock as anyone can get and he wants to make sure that his parents know that as well, but of course his words are failing him when Yu Ziyuan sends him a sharp look.

“How are your studies, while we’re at it?” Yu Ziyuan asks him and something inside of Jiang Cheng clenches up in fear.

He knows that no matter what he says it won’t be enough, because his grades are not as good as Wei Wuxian’s used to be and he’s not the best of his class, either.

“I trust that you’re not meeting any expectations, like always?”

Jiang Cheng needs two tries before he can finally make his mouth work.

“I am not failing,” he whispers, his hand reaching out for Nie Mingjue’s which is still on his thigh, and he’s ashamed to find that he’s shaking.

“He’s doing very well,” Nie Mingjue says, clearly trying to help him and while Jiang Cheng wants to appreciate that, he knows it will only make it worse.

“Let’s not get ahead of ourselves,” Yu Ziyuan disdainfully says. “You’re not valedictorian after all, right? So how well can you really be doing.”

Jiang Cheng feels how shame chokes him and makes his eyes burn and he wishes the ground would just open up and swallow him whole.

Surely that must be better than sitting here and hearing his parents tell him how he can never be good enough. Surely that must be better than having Nie Mingjue hear all of this.

“I’m trying my best,” Jiang Cheng whispers, the need to justify his actions—and failings—sitting so deeply inside of him that he argues against his parents even though he knows he shouldn’t.

But surely one of these days they must see that he is doing well for himself, right?

“And your best is yet again not enough to surpass Wei Wuxian,” his mother snaps and Jiang Cheng wonders what needs to happen so that she can let go of this resentment she has against Wei Wuxian.

“It’s not really a fair competition, though, right?” Nie Mingjue asks and Jiang Cheng jerks. “As far as I understood it, they are working in completely different fields?”

“What would you understand of family matters? How long have you been around again?” his mother wants to know, eying Nie Mingjue like he is something dirty that’s staining her dining table.

“Almost two years now,” Nie Mingjue tersely gives back, clearly fed up with the tone Yu Ziyuan uses with him and Jiang Cheng enjoys the surprised look on his mother’s face.

He deliberately didn’t tell her about Nie Mingjue before because he just knew it would end like this, and he was in no rush to introduce Nie Mingjue to them. He knows Jiang Yanli and Wei Wuxian and for all that Jiang Cheng cares his siblings are the important parts of this family.

“So what’s wrong with you, then?” Jiang Fengmian suddenly speaks up and Jiang Cheng slowly turns towards him.

“Excuse me, what?” Nie Mingjue asks, clearly as taken aback as Jiang Cheng himself is, but Jiang Fengmian only waves his hand.

“Come on, you can tell us,” he encourages him and the frown on Nie Mingjue’s face only deepens.

“I’m afraid I don’t understand what you mean.”

His voice is tightly controlled and Jiang Cheng knows it for the sign of anger it is, but he has to give it to Nie Mingjue, he’s keeping himself together much better than Jiang Cheng thought he would.

Certainly better than Jiang Cheng himself.

Jiang Cheng isn’t quite sure where his father is going with this inquiry, but Jiang Cheng knows enough to be able to predict that this will probably hurt worse than everything else his parents threw at him this far, and seeing as this is clearly aimed at Nie Mingjue that’s saying a lot.

“There must be something wrong with you or why else would you willingly settle for Wanyin. Are you a known criminal? A psycho? Is there something else wrong with you? Are you dying and just looking for a convenient partner?”

Jiang Cheng goes ice-cold. He would never admit to it but even after two years there's still this sliver of doubt of why someone as amazing as Nie Mingjue would ever settle for him and just like always his parents manage to hit just where it hurts the most.

“Father,” Jiang Cheng tries, keeping his death grip on Nie Mingjue’s hand but even that lifeline can’t keep him together anymore.

“No, Wanyin, we need to know for the inevitable fallout. Imagine the press that would get us if he turns out to be a criminal.”

“You never bothered to check up Lan Wangji,” Yu Ziyuan suddenly speaks up and Jiang Cheng tries to melt into his chair.

“Why should I? I trust Wei Ying’s judgement,” Jiang Fengmian easily replies and Yu Ziyuan scoffs disdainfully.

“He was getting distracted by every pretty face he came across.”

“At least he showed interest in people and things. Unlike Wanyin, who can’t be bothered to even have a hobby.”

Jiang Cheng clenches his jaw. He did have a hobby, not that his father seems to remember that; a hobby Wei Wuxian took up for about five days, was better at than him and then his mother made sure that Jiang Cheng never wanted to step foot into a swimming pool ever again.

“He’s clearly getting distracted at every turn,” Yu Ziyuan snaps back and Jiang Cheng ducks his head in anticipation of what’s coming next.

He got pretty good at figuring out when they will turn on him again.

“Speaking of distractions,” Yi Ziyuan says, her eyes now fixed on Jiang Cheng again. “Is he—” here she glares at Nie Mingjue, who seems ready to snap himself, “the reason your grades dropped two years ago?”

Jiang Cheng takes a deep breath before he answers, but it does nothing to calm him down.

Trust his mother to remember something like this, but struggle with his birthday.

“No,” he eventually gets out. “And my grades didn’t drop. I failed one exam, which I aced when I retook it. And that was before I met Mingjue.”

“Just admit that he’s distracting you. I bet you could have better grades if you weren’t spending time with him,” Yu Ziyuan icily says and Jiang Cheng knows that she’s aiming for Nie Mingjue’s intelligence again here, so he sits up a bit straighter.

It’s fine if they insult him, he’s used to that after all; but he will not allow his parents to make a judgement over Nie Mingjue when they don’t even know him.

“He is not distracting me,” he tells them and he’s surprised that his voice isn’t shaking. “If anything, he helps me stay focused. My grades wouldn’t be this good if I didn’t have Mingjue,” he says and threads their fingers together, giving a small smile to Nie Mingjue when he squeezes his hand.

There’s a beat of silence before Jiang Fengmian sighs and Yu Ziyuan slams her hand on the table.

“So what you’re saying is that you’re yet again too weak to do anything by yourself. Do I have to remind you that Wei Wuxian is already done with his studies and he had no one to help him? And yet here you are, and even with help you can’t measure up to him!”

“Wanyin, you know better than to enrage your mother like this,” Jiang Fengmian mildly says, as if all of this was Jiang Cheng’s fault and he can feel the humiliating burn of tears.

It somehow always boils down to him messing up and he doesn’t even know how to fix it. There is nothing he can say or do that would satisfy both of them and right now it feels like it’s going to tear Jiang Cheng apart.

“That’s enough,” Nie Mingjue suddenly says and he’s using his no-nonsense voice.

The one he brings out when some particularly stupid and demanding customers try to cheat their way out of payment or something like that.

Jiang Cheng is ashamed to admit that it makes him go just a little bit hot under the collar, even in a situation like this.

“How dare you?” Yu Ziyuan hisses but Nie Mingjue shakes his head.

“No, how dare you? There isn’t anything wrong with me for being in love with Wanyin. He is amazing, compassionate, hard-working, reliable and so much better than either of you clearly know. If anything, I should ask you what’s wrong with you that you can’t see it,” Nie Mingjue says, and there is no hint of doubt in his voice and it makes Jiang Cheng flush.

“Stop,” he still weakly says, because he doesn’t want them to fight, doesn’t want to hear his parents tear down what Nie Mingjue just said, but Nie Mingjue doesn’t give them a chance to speak.

“I would say it was nice meeting you, but my parents taught me some basic manners, and lying is generally frowned upon in my family, so—” he trails off with a shrug as he gets up, dragging Jiang Cheng along by his hand. “We’ll be leaving now,” Nie Mingjue announces and simply walks away from the dinner and Jiang Cheng’s parents.

Jiang Cheng resists the tug of his hand for a moment longer, foolishly thinking that maybe he can salvage all of this somehow, but then he sees the disappointed head shake of his father and the telling look in his mother’s eyes and Jiang Cheng simply doesn’t have the strength to deal with this. He doesn’t have the words to defend Nie Mingjue from them and he especially doesn’t have the words to defend himself.

He follows Nie Mingjue.

“Jiang Wanyin,” his mother warningly calls after him, but Jiang Cheng doesn’t listen to her.

He will pay dearly for this later—at the latest during their next dinner—but he doesn’t care right now.

Right now he’s too busy shaking and following Nie Mingjue to think about that.

Nie Mingjue doesn’t stop walking until they are a good way away from his parent’s house and then he turns around and simply takes Jiang Cheng into his arms.

“I love you,” he says and that is enough to make Jiang Cheng break down.

He starts to sob his heart out, clinging to the back of Nie Mingjue’s shirt, and any other time he would be ashamed of how easily he gets affected by this, but right now he’s safe in Nie Mingjue’s arms after one of the worst evenings he had and he just lets go.

It takes him a long time to calm down.

“It’s not true,” Nie Mingjue says as soon as Jiang Cheng stops sobbing. “Nothing what they said is true. You are the most amazing person I know and I count myself lucky every day that you decide to stay with me.”

Normally Jiang Cheng would argue against that, because he learned to believe something else, but right now, he’s too exhausted to do anything but let these words wash over him and soothe his soul.

“I love you,” Jiang Cheng whispers into Nie Mingjue’s chest, because he can’t argue with him but he also can’t agree to what he just said, and so this is the best he can do right now.

“I know that,” Nie Mingjue reassures him, pushing him slightly away so he can lift his head with a finger under Jiang Cheng’s chin and then he’s kissing him. “I know that and I thank the heavens for that every day.”

“Stop that,” Jiang Cheng weakly says, because despite the tears marring his face he can feel himself blush.

“Never,” Nie Mingjue says with a small smile but then he grows serious again and something like fear settles in Jiang Cheng’s stomach. “Wanyin, I have a request.” He waits just long enough for Jiang Cheng to nod before he goes on. “I want you to meet my parents.”

Jiang Cheng stills at those words. So far he had avoided meeting Nie Mingjue’s parents, but of course he couldn’t put it off forever. But to think that he’d have to meet them today, after what happened with his own parents—

“No,” he chokes out, the fear gripping his heart. “Please don’t, I can’t take any more,” he whispers, because he knows himself.

He’s going to break if someone else criticises him today and he doesn’t want Nie Mingjue to see that.

“My heart, do you trust me?” Nie Mingjue asks him and despite how he can barely think through his panic, Jiang Cheng nods. “Then trust me that they will love you,” he softly tells Jiang Cheng.

Jiang Cheng hesitates, because no parent has ever loved him, but with how Nie Mingjue looks at him there is nothing else for him to do but to nod.

“Fine,” he croaks out, even though he’s sure it will be anything but.

Jiang Cheng watches with dread as Nie Mingjue pulls out his phone and dials a number, putting the phone on speaker before someone even picks up.

“A-Jue,” a woman’s voice speaks up suddenly and Jiang Cheng watches as a small smile darts over Nie Mingjue’s face.

Jiang Cheng hates himself a little bit for feeling bitter about that, because not once did he smile when his parents were on the phone.

“Mom,” Nie Mingjue gives back and Jiang Cheng knows that it’s not actually Nie Mingjue’s mom, but Nie Huaisang’s but it doesn’t seem to matter one bit to either of them.

“Aren’t you supposed to meet Jiang Wanyin’s parents today?” his mother asks and Nie Mingjue grimaces.

“Yeah,” he agrees. “Let’s just say the meeting was cut short.”

“Uh-oh,” Nie Meili says. “What did you do?”

“Nothing they didn’t deserve,” Nie Mingjue says and tucks Jiang Cheng into his side. “Listen, I was wondering if we could drop by?”

“You know you can always come over,” Nie Meili tells him. “Your dad is picking up A-Sang as we speak.”

Nie Mingjue throws a questioning glance at Jiang Cheng, clearly wanting to know if that is okay with him. Jiang Cheng nods, because Nie Huaisang knows about his parents better than Nie Mingjue did until today and it will be nice to have him there to act as a buffer, too.

Jiang Cheng is still convinced that Nie Mingjue’s parents are not going to like him much, anyway.

“We could be there in thirty minutes.”

“You better, I have been dying to meet your boyfriend! We can order pizza, what would he like?”

Nie Meili sounds honestly excited by the prospect to meet Jiang Cheng and that alone is confusing enough for Jiang Cheng.

Nie Mingjue makes a pained sound at his mother’s question, causing Jiang Cheng to smirk and Nie Meili to laugh.

“Pineapple and ham, got it,” she cheerfully says and then hangs up without another word.

“When will you ever stop criticising my choice of pizza?” Jiang Cheng wants to know, trying very hard to distract himself with that.

He is in no rush for Nie Meili to realize what a horrible person Jiang Cheng really is and demanding that her son dates someone better than him.

“When you develop some taste and order anything but this,” Nie Mingjue immediately gives back and presses a kiss to Jiang Cheng’s head. “Now quit your worrying, they are going to love you. They have been waiting to meet you for so long.”

“You probably raised all kinds of expectations, that I can’t meet,” Jiang Cheng mumbles, his stomach already churning again, but Nie Mingjue shakes his head.

“I gave them exactly the right expectations,” he confidently tells Jiang Cheng and then he drags him off to the car.

“What if they don’t like me?” Jiang Cheng asks once he’s buckled into the seat and he has to give credit to Nie Mingjue when he doesn’t sigh at his question.

“Not possible,” Nie Mingjue instead gives back, sounding absolutely sure about that, but Jiang Cheng can’t stop his worrying.

“What if—”

“Stop it, my heart,” Nie Mingjue interrupts him and reaches over to take his hand. “They are going to love you, because you are perfectly lovable. What your parents said today speaks more about their personality than yours and my parents will see you for the amazing man you are. Just trust me on that.”

Jiang Cheng wants to—by the gods, does he want to—but he can’t help but to be scared. Nie Mingjue seems to know it, because he doesn’t let go of Jiang Cheng’s hand until absolutely necessary and soon enough they are pulling up in front of a house.

“Ready?” Nie Mingjue asks after they sat in silence for a minute or more and Jiang Cheng takes a deep breath.

“No, but I trust you,” he gives back and then gets out of the car, Nie Mingjue following closely behind him.

“Thank you,” Nie Mingjue says, darting in for a quick kiss before he enters the house.

“We’re home!” he yells and Jiang Cheng unsurely hesitates at the door.

He is not used to simply barging in to his parent’s home and he’s not sure if he should here and what kind of first impression it would make if he did but before he can worry his head off over this, Nie Mingjue already tugged him along, deeper into the house.

“Finally,” Nie Meili says, and when she comes out of what Jiang Cheng presumes is the living-room, she immediately walks past Nie Mingjue, only lightly slapping his arm in greeting. “So you’re Jiang Wanyin,” she says when she comes to stop in front of Jiang Cheng and Jiang Cheng can feel the panic grip him again.

She puts her hands on his shoulders, moves him slightly from side to side and then simply pulls him into a hug. “Welcome to the family,” she says and Jiang Cheng is completely frozen.

This is not going like he imagined at all and he doesn’t know how to handle this.

“Mom,” Nie Mingjue sighs and comes back to stand next to Jiang Cheng. “Please don’t be embarrassing.”

“Your fault if you get embarrassed that easily. You didn’t tell us that he’s absolutely gorgeous,” she says as she takes a step back and Jiang Cheng flushes.

“It’s nice to meet you,” he finally brings out, remembering his manners far too late and Nie Meili laughs.

“It is, it is indeed! Now come on, I have something you have to sign.”

She doesn’t wait for a reply from either of them and simply drags Jiang Cheng into the living-room where a sheet of paper lays on the table.

Jiang Cheng freezes at the sight of it, a million possibilities running through his head, and all of them end with him having to leave, having to break up with Nie Mingjue.

“Trust me,” Nie Mingjue whispers in his ear, his hand a reassuring weight on Jiang Cheng’s back, and Jiang Cheng leans into it, seeking that warmth and reassurance.

“Here, you have to sign here,” Nie Meili says and shoves a pen into Jiang Cheng’s hands, excitedly pointing at the paper.

Jiang Cheng swallows heavily, before he leans in closer to read what it says. He manages to read it over exactly once, before his vision gets blurry with tears.

“What?” he croaks out, because surely he must have read that wrong.

“Let me see that,” Nie Mingjue says and snatches the paper out of his hand. “Hereby we formerly adopt Jiang Wanyin, Jiang Cheng, into the Nie family. This is unconditional and will be valid even after you break up with our son,” he reads out loud. “Mom, what the hell?”

Nie Meili shrugs unapologetically. “What? With what you said about meeting his parents it must have been downright catastrophic, we just raised you too polite to tell them exactly where to stick it.”

“Oh no, he did,” Jiang Cheng snorts out, wiping his tears away. “He did tell them.”

“Then it must have been really bad. Sign here now,” she says and points at the dotted line.

“Wanyin, you don’t have to play along with her insanity,” Nie Mingjue says as Jiang Cheng takes the paper out of his hand.

“But maybe I want to,” he gives back, feeling inexplicably warm that Nie Meili would do something like this, even though it doesn’t really have any formal meaning. “Maybe I want to,” he mutters much more quiet when he reads it over again, tears burning in his eyes yet again. “If you are sure, though,” he then says, looking at Nie Meili.

They don’t really know him, after all. They could come to regret this. And even though it’s just a stupid piece of paper, it would break Jiang Cheng’s heart if they should change their mind.

“A-Jue doesn’t stop talking about you. He never shuts up, he loves you so much. There is no way we’re going to regret this. It already feels like you’re part of the family anyway,” Nie Meili reassures him and before Jiang Cheng can talk himself out of this, he swiftly signs his name.

“Done,” he croaks out and makes a surprised noise when Nie Meili pulls him into a crushing hug.

“Welcome to the family, Jiang Cheng!”

It’s enough to set Jiang Cheng off again, of course, but Nie Meili just holds him through it and doesn’t berate him for his tears even once. They only part when the door opens and Nie Huaisang comes skipping into the room.

“Ehm, what is happening here?” he wants to know, clearly honing in on Jiang Cheng’s tears and Jiang Cheng pushes away from Nie Meili.

She doesn’t let go of him though, she simply turns him around, her hands anchoring him in place, and she waits until Nie Gengxin comes into the room as well.

“Honey, A-Sang, meet our newest family member, A-Cheng!”

Nie Huaisang lets out an excited shriek, but Nie Gengxin frowns, before he turns towards Nie Mingjue.

“I thought you wanted to wait at least another year until you propose?” he asks and Jiang Cheng’s eyes go big as Nie Mingjue flushes bright red.

“Dad!” he hisses, turning wide eyes on Jiang Cheng. “I did not propose!”

“Yet,” Nie Meili says and Nie Mingjue groans, slapping his hands over his face.

“Coming here was a mistake,” he mutters and Jiang Cheng is still frozen in shock.

“You want to propose?” he eventually whispers out and it’s enough to cut off all of Nie Huaisang’s and Nie Meili’s teasing and Nie Gengxin’s apologies.

“Of course I want to propose, my heart,” Nie Mingjue immediately says and steps up to Jiang Cheng to take his hands in his. “It’s not a lie when I say I want to spend the rest of my life with you. I told them I would want to, eventually, but I don’t even have a ring yet. I really did intent to wait a bit longer!”

“Sorry,” Nie Gengxin sheepishly says but Jiang Cheng only has eyes for Nie Mingjue.

“Seriously?”

“Seriously,” Nie Mingjue gives back without hesitation and Jiang Cheng flings himself at him.

“But not yet,” he whispers into his neck, because he’s not ready for that step, and he thinks they might not be ready either. “But eventually.”

“Not yet, though,” Nie Mingjue agrees easily and Jiang Cheng melts into his arms.

“I will be best man, obviously.” He falls silent for a moment. “Jiang Cheng’s, though,” Nie Huaisang says and before Nie Mingjue can complain about that Nie Huaisang promptly leaves when their pizza arrives.

Jiang Cheng chuckles weakly at that, but it’s not long before it turns into sobs again.

“Sh, it’s alright,” Nie Mingjue whispers into his hair, hugging him a bit harder and Jiang Cheng yet again shakes apart in his arms.

“It’s good, it’s good, it’s just—” Jiang Cheng manages to get out and he can feel Nie Mingjue’s rumbling laugh in his chest.

“It’s just a bit much,” he finishes for him. “Yeah, I know. But I’m not sorry for bringing you here today.”

“I’m not either,” Jiang Cheng admits, because this easy acceptance from Nie Mingjue’s parents is honestly everything he needed today. “But if they continue like this I’ll cry multiple times today.”

“We’re a bunch of criers, you’ll fit right in,” Nie Mingjue reassures him and true to his words, when Jiang Cheng pulls away to look at him he can see tears in Nie Mingjue’s eyes as well.

“We make a pretty pair, huh?” Jiang Cheng huffs out and wipes Nie Mingjue’s tears away.

“The best pair,” he gives back immediately and kisses Jiang Cheng’s fingers. “Now come on, your abomination gets cold.”

That causes Jiang Cheng to laugh again and he easily follows Nie Mingjue towards the kitchen.

It’s all still too much; first his own horrible parents and now this acceptance that he isn’t used to, and Jiang Cheng continues to feel shaken and unmoored, but when Nie Mingjue’s hand finds his, he thinks that no matter what, he might be able to do it.

As long as he has Nie Mingjue by his side he can do anything.

Link to my ko-fi on the sidebar!

#bt writes #mingcheng #the untamed #mdzs #modern au #established relationship #meeting the parents #the jiang parents suck #like always #the nie parents rock though #angst #hurt/comfort #self-esteem issues #but are they really self-esteem issues if this is what your parents tell you?#fluff

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