#he and buck are gonna have the wildest sex of all time btw and theyre gonna be soooo weird about it

[eddiegettingshot]

okay Im the anon that sent you that ask about shannon and eddie + physical and romantic attraction and like the people that think hes only physically attracted to buck/not attracted to women are crazy. he very clearly finds ana attractive when he first sees her and literally the only thing he knows about marisol and their relationship is that he likes to have sex with her (or at least they have a very active sex life). not to mention eddie and shannon using sex as a distraction from talking about their feelings and place in each others life (eddie did once say sex complicates everything). like could be comphet but idk it just reads to me as clearly he experiences physical attraction to these women and has has good physical relationships with them but has a tendency to confuse that with emotional attraction, which is why "nesting" with shannon was a bad idea both times probably and why he was so confused at the end of their relationship and why "nesting" with ana and marisol isnt working out like he thinks it will. and of course adjacent to this is he might not recognize the connection he has with buck as romantic because it is fundamentally different than the connections he has had with women that he views as people he had a strong romantic connection with. like despite the buddie and eddie/shannon parallels re:what eddie is trying to replicate when it comes to his emotional relationship with shannon, buck and eddie's connection even different than eddie and shannon because when their relationship was too emotionally taxing they both ran away (multiple times) but when eddie tried to run away from the 118 because working there was too much for him buck was there the whole time until eddie let him in. and not to say hes not physically attracted to buck but like attraction to men and women are not always the same and buck literally said in the last episode he thought he was staring at guy's asses for funsies lol. anyways thanks for accidentally indulging me because I would much rather write eddie meta than read shannon spec rn lmao

no this is soooooo right. and also buck saying "i think you mean the first woman you slept with" lol (so out of pocket).

the reason i think it's probably genuine attraction is because i think you could make a pretty strong case that eddie not only confuses the two, but actively (if subconsciously) tries to replicate emotional intimacy using sexual intimacy. he has sex and it feels really good, he feels close to someone, he's enjoying himself, she's enjoying herself... that part is easier for him than talking about anything or being vulnerable, and he likes it enough that he can convince himself that sexual connection and emotional connection are interchangeable.

like, with shannon, he wanted desperately to be emotionally close to her again but things were hard as fuck, so they kept sleeping together instead. and with marisol, he was sleeping with her enthusiastically up until the point where he didn't want to be emotionally close to her anymore; he learned something about her that made him question whether he even wanted her in his life and that was when he stopped wanting to have sex with her. and he very obviously thought ana was hot lol it's kind of undeniable.

not to go against the fanon grain, but i'm pretty sure eddie's issue with "casual" isn't that he doesn't want to fuck people he has no emotional connection with, it's that he wants to fuck first and decides afterwards that that means he must also want the emotional connection (real or imagined) that, in his experience, tends to follow (.....it happened with shannon). and because he's obsessed with finding love that feels like magic, well........... like i can see how sleeping with someone he's super attracted to, combined with his intense emotional repression, has historically made the confusion easy lol