#he DID infiltrate a cult and managed to act normal the whole time

[nu-carniviva]

The official Halloween art confirms my headcanon. My brain is huge and I'm the smartest person alive

Random Headcanon

Olivine loves horror. In fact, he's the biggest horror fan in the whole clan. His favorite genres in particular are psychological and gothic horror, those really get his heart pounding.

Don't be deceived by his sweet voice and face when he recommends a horror book to you. Unless you're a horror fan yourself, you might be unable to sleep for the next few days. He's really into some wicked stuff that is guaranteed to fuck with your mind.

Bonus headcanon that Olivine writes horror stories himself, but he doesn't really share them because he worries they might be a little too intense for the children who he primarily reads to.

[januaryisnotanartist]

So day 5 of KanSang week is Wang Clan! Liu Sang.

Which got me thinking about how would Liu Sang fit in with the Wang Clan (and Wang Can) and still be Liu Sang (and not secretly Wang Can), and how could I get KanSang from such a universe?

I derailed directly into Liu Sang & Li Cu are bros.

(warning, this (d)evolved into a kinda fic as I was rambling.)

-

We begin with “Wang Can is the younger half brother of Liu Sang”, top it off with a bit of “evil step mother who was willing to burn her step son alive in an attempt to frame him for attempted murder gone wrong clearly belongs to a crazy death cult and was secretly a Wang operative the whole time, so when she and her husband died the Wang Clan swooped in to pick up the free orphans freshly traumatised kids ripe for brainwashing indoctrination into their cult clan.”

So now we have Liu Wang Can, who was raised by a woman who was already preparing him to join the Wang Clan, and Liu Sang who, because I need him to have a reason to firmly resist the Wang's Anti-Zhang propaganda, is from the Worship False Idols universe. (Which is to say: Liu Sang was rescued from human traffickers by Zhang Qiling before he moved in with his estranged father and wicked stepmother.)

Wang Can dives headfirst into the clan and evil assassin training, while Liu Sang keeps his head down because: where else can he go? His brother is here, he has no one left to turn to, and this clan is out for his ouxiang. Liu Sang chooses to stay so he can learn everything about the man who saved him, and more? importantly: about the clan who plan to hurt the man who'd saved him.

Everyone assumes Wang Can is the more terrifying “twin”. They're wrong.

Liu Sang has to watch as his brother strips away his own humanity despite Liu Sang's best efforts.

And then comes Li Cu.

Liu Sang would laugh if his brother's poor reaction to having a crush wasn't so... horrifying. He's not even sure Wang Can has realised his increased brutality and douchebaggery are attempts to show off for Li Cu.

As a big brother, Liu Sang thinks it might be his responsibility to explain some things before Li Cu kills Wang Can in self-defense, so he tracks down the new comer at one of the out door firing ranges while Li Cu's taking a break.

(Liu Sang hates the firing ranges, they always give him sensory overload, then Wang Can has to go out on extra dangerous missions just to prove they're useful and Wang Liu Sang isn't a burden, because like hell is he ever going to tell them just how much he can hear. They, because they're always considered as a unit, because both of them cling a little too much to one another. There's a reason they can't shake the foul rumours about their relationship, they're both too possessive.)

He remembers to make noise loud enough for a normal person to hear before he gets within striking distance, finds a nice crunchy leaf and crushes it under foot to get Li Cu's attention. Li Cu's first reaction almost makes Liu Sang laugh out loud.

“The hell did you do to your hair?!”

Because Liu Sang's hair has always had more red than Wang Can's, and they wear it differently. He doesn't stop the smirk though, tosses Li Cu a candy bar (technically contraband while off mission) and waits to see how long it takes Li Cu to realise he's not Wang Can.

It takes a few less sentences than Liu Sang hoped for Li Cu to cotton on, but still long enough for it to be funny.

They don't become friends, but they certainly aren't enemies, and they aren't nothing to each other.

Almost something like friends maybe.

Liu Sang reminds Li Cu not to lose himself to the Wang Clan, because they're very good at acting nice, at choosing just the right person to send to get under your skin. Every person you trusted in the Wang Clan was another way they had to get you to do what they wanted.

Liu Sang getting close to Li Cu ends up riling Wang Can, who can't figure out which of them he's more jealous about, so the higher ups send Liu Sang off on a mission.

“Only a week or two.”

Liu Sang says goodbye to Li Cu on his way out.

“Do ever think about leaving the Wangs?” Li Cu wants to know. “Just, go missing in the middle of a mission on not look back?”

“My brother's here,” Liu Sang tells him. Because the Wangs know how to use connections, and if they'd ever sent both brothers out together, Liu Sang would have given in to the temptation to run away years ago. To drag his brother back to some semblance of humanity and not the murder puppet the Wangs had turned him into.

-

Liu Sang returns to a compound devoid of life, the secret regrouping call had gone out, he knows where he's supposed to go but there's a terrible weight sitting in his chest as he walks through the building. The poisonous gas no longer a threat, he can see where the infiltrators' bodies would have been.

They'd taken their own dead and left the Wangs to rot.

He'd have found it funny if his brother hadn't been one of the corpses.

Liu Sang can't hear himself screaming over the ringing in his ears, his world falling apart at the seams. He'd kept himself together through the hell of the Wangs by focusing on trying to take care of his brother.

Who is he if he's not Wang Can's gege?

His brother is dead, and he knows exactly whose fault it is.

There's a grenade pin by his brother's corpse, and explosive damage by on of the vents, and the Wangs had made his brother such a good little soldier.

Liu Sang thinks of the man with the tattoo who'd saved him from one hell only to leave him to another. The man the Wangs hated more than any other.

He has no path forward but one. Liu Sang takes the information he'd gathered painstakingly through the years in secret, always too afraid to use it, and heads to the meeting location.

When his is the only heartbeat left there, he goes to find every safe house and backup location left.

He tracks down every member of the Wangs he can find and ensures no one loyal lives.

And then he's left back where he was. Alone. No idea what to do next.

-

Li Cu thinks he's hallucinating the first time he sees Liu Sang across the street.

To be fair, he hadn't even been sure it was him, Liu Sang had vanished almost as Li Cu was noticing him.

He'd never mentioned Liu Sang to Wu Xie and the others, it hadn't felt right. Liu Sang wasn't a Wang, not really. He'd taken the name, the tattoo, but unlike his brother, Liu Sang had still hung on to his old name, a secret Liu Sang had only shared once when he'd been tired enough to be tipsy.

Now Liu Sang was here, and obviously wanted to talk to Li Cu judging by how often Li Cu caught him watching. Liu Sang had apologised more than once for Wang Can's poor social skills, but Liu Sang's weren't exactly up to par either, unless they were being directly compared to his brother's.

So Li Cu makes himself available, waits in the cold, dark night for Liu Sang to appear from nowhere. And by cold, dark night, Li Cu means he takes to haunting a quiet table at a street food vendor while he tries to study.

Liu Sang sits down across from him with food, and they just share the table for a while, eating, studying, waiting.

From up close Liu Sang looks terrible, and not for the first time since Wu Xie had raided the Wang base, Li Cu wonders what happened to Liu Sang.

“Sorry about your brother,” Li Cu doesn't realise he's going to say it out loud until it's already out of his mouth. It seems like the kind of thing he should be saying though.

Liu Sang freezes, chopsticks halfway to his mouth, a clump of rice drops back onto his plate.

“You don't have to lie about it,” Liu Sang says at last, “I think part of me always knew we weren't both leaving.” He puts his chopsticks down and looks a little lost. “Sometimes, I wonder I there was ever anything in him that I could have saved.”

“Not by the end,” Li Cu says, and there's a look of realisation on Liu Sang's face, and Li Cu gets the feeling Liu Sang knows now that Li Cu had been there when Wang Can had pulled the pin from the grenade.

They sit in silence so long, Li Cu wonders if he should go back to his food or his textbook, but then Liu Sang finally starts talking again.

“I actually, tracked you down to ask...” Liu Sang looks like he'd rather swallow razors, “for a favour. From you. I want to ask you to do me a favour.”

Of all the things Li Cu expects to follow, learning tattoo artistry is not one of them. It takes months before Liu Sang is happy with Li Cu's skills, by which time Li Cu has long stopped asking why Liu Sang doesn't just go to a proper tattoo artist.

He doesn't ask where Liu Sang got the equipment, or how he'd managed to get the studio for an entire day, he doesn't know if he wants an answer or not.

Li Cu knows that Liu Sang already has a tattoo, all the Wang Clan members had had one, a phoenix on the back of their right shoulders that only showed in the heat. Li Cu had been not far off having to get one as well, something that had repulsed him so deeply he'd been shaken by the depth of it.

His back had already been mutilated, like hell he'd let anyone else mark him against his will again.

(He hates that he suddenly understands why Liu Sang had gotten him to learn to tattoo.)

To his surprise, there's also an unfinished tattoo across Liu Sang's chest, and it looks vaguely familiar to Li Cu.

“Qilin?” He thinks he knows why.

Liu Sang nods, and turns his back so Li Cu can press a hot cloth against his shoulder. Once the phoenix is visible, Li Cu places the stencil carefully so it aligns just right then readies the tools while they wait for the phoenix to vanish from sight.

Li Cu has only been practicing for a few months, so he's not very fast, but he makes sure the lines are steady, that the shading is right.

It takes all day, and they won't be able to check the cover up has worked for another few days, but in the end Li Cu is confident no amount of heat will let the phoenix show through the multi-tailed fox he's inked onto Liu Sang's shoulder.

-

Before they part ways again, Li Cu pulls Liu Sang into what is probably the world's most awkward hug, and makes sure he has Li Cu's contact information.

“At least let me know you're alive every once in a while, yeah?” Because Li Cu already knows Liu Sang's leaving.

Liu Sang nods, but Li Cu isn't really expecting much.

Three days later he gets a picture of a town sign from an unfamiliar number, accompanied by the words: Not Dead Yet.

-

Liu Sang keeps in contact, more than Li Cu thought he would, not that he minds. Except that Liu Sang has a strange penchant for meerkat memes and keeps being weirdly funny at the worst possible times.

Like a few years later when Li Cu learned Liu Sang was on a job with Erbai's crew after Liu Sang sent him a text, which caused Li Cu to snort his drink through his nose and all over his freshly complete collage homework.

Help! He's a Himbo! My One True Weakness!

[artekai]

I recently picked Mystic Messenger back up, and combined with my P5R brainrot, it gave me a crack crossover idea that just won’t leave me alone:

AU where Rika and V are Takuto’s parents.

Okay, hear me out for a second.

(Bear in mind that it’s been a year since I last played Mystic Messenger and I haven’t seen all the endings yet -- I haven’t played Rika’s Before Story or V’s After -- so this might not make any sense in canon and the characterization might be all over the place. Then again, it’s a crack AU, so…)

Major spoilers for both Mystic Messenger and Persona 5 Royal under the read more!

The beginning is fairly obvious. Rika and V are an inseparable couple, they get engaged, she gets pregnant. But then The Mint Eye thing happens.

Rika considers getting rid of the baby just because it’s V’s, but deep down she still has feelings for him. Plus, having a baby in the cult is like getting a new believer but without all the purifying process, right? So she keeps the child.

Rika treats Takuto similarly to how she treats MC: she’s strangely kind to him, she mostly keeps him away from the other believers, and she doesn’t force him to take the elixir or anything. She already sees Takuto as being purified, because he’s just a toddler, so no need for all those painful rituals; she just needs to raise him the way she wants. Of course, since he’s the savior’s son, all of the believers think he’s like Baby Jesus, so no one bothers him.

You know what happens then. Canon happens. I’m not sure what route and what ending would fit this, but it needs to be a route where they go to Mint Eye and save Saeran. Maybe V’s Normal Ending? I don’t know, I can’t remember if Saeran survives in that ending. Well, let’s assume he does because I need that for my sanity.

And if he doesn’t, then I don’t care tHIS IS A FIX-IT AU.

please let me have this.

So, anyways, they infiltrate Mint Eye, they save Saeran, and they find Takuto. Given that V has been infiltrating the Mint Eye for a while, he already knows about him, and by now he has figured out that that must be his child. Either way, they get him away from the cult before any “cleansing” can take place, and V and MC commit to taking care of him.

Takuto starts off as a very anxious kid, which is normal considering that a bunch of strangers suddenly took him away from his mother and everything he has ever known. He mainly sticks with Saeran (which isn’t good for either of them), but, over time, MC gets him to open up to her and V and, eventually, to the rest of the RFA. Of course, Rika already drilled her ideas of “true paradise” and “eternal happiness” into him, so V and MC take it upon themselves to decondition him and reeducate him. Their efforts pay off, as Takuto eventually manages to adjust to normal society fairly well, but you know that those cultish ideas will still linger in the back of his mind, even if he doesn’t realize it.

Though his memories of Mint Eye completely fade away with age, Takuto inherits V’s gentleness and self-sacrificial tendencies and Rika’s madness and obsession with eradicating pain. When he’s mature enough, he also learns about what happened around that time (but maybe he doesn’t have all the details), because V and MC are determined to not keep any more harmful secrets like they used to.

Anyways, growing up with the RFA fuels Takuto’s natural passion for helping people. Yoosung introduces him to cooking, Jaehee teaches him her work ethic, Saeyoung transfers him his love of cats and animals in general (which is why, in Takuto’s words, “they don’t seem to share the sentiment”), and Zen constantly reminds him to never give up his dreams, no matter how crazy they might seem. He tells him about how he ran away from home to pursue his dream career and has never regretted it since, which Takuto takes very seriously.

As for Jumin, Takuto thinks that he’s too cold-hearted, but he looks up to him for his managerial talent and admires the bond that he shares with his father. When V and MC are away from home, Jumin offers to babysit Takuto for them, so he gets many exclusive tours of C&R, where he starts dreaming of growing up to work on a project much larger than himself with experts in the field (read: leading a team of researchers and having his very own lab).

Takuto also sees that Saeyoung and Saeran are getting along well and slowly overcoming their trauma together, so he comes to believe that everyone can change for the better, and thus, that everyone deserves a second chance, regardless of the mistakes they’ve made in the past. This will come into play at least two times: First, in his reality, when he lets Akechi and most of the Palace Owners roam free; and, second, when he decides to turn his own life around after the change of heart.

Anyways, Takuto meets Rumi, begins dating her, graduates high school, goes to college, and gets engaged after a few years.

V has always felt uneasy about Takuto dating. He knows that Takuto is too nice for his own good, so a part of him is afraid that he’ll end up in an obsessive relationship like the one he had with Rika. But, when Takuto introduces Rumi to his family, he and MC can tell that she’s supportive, well-adjusted, and considerate of Takuto’s feelings, so they are happy for both of them.

And then the burglary thing happens.

Takuto closes himself off from friends and family, overcome with grief and guilt. He still keeps in contact with the RFA, but it’s only because he knows that they will only get more worried if he stops talking to them altogether. Everyone at RFA is concerned, but V especially so, because he understands the pain of losing your fiancée and blaming yourself for not being able to do something to help her, and he doesn’t want Takuto to deal with it on his own.

After Takuto rewrites Rumi’s memories, he tells the RFA the same thing he tells everyone: he and Rumi broke up and it was his fault. This isn’t the RFA’s first rodeo, so most of them can tell that he’s hiding something, but they’ve known him for a long time, they know he’s a good person, and they basically raised him, so they decide to trust him (for the most part).

Takuto isolates himself more and more, acting like he’s fine to avoid being a burden, convinced that he must solve his problems by himself, like his father does. V and MC can see where this is going, and the former keeps spamming the messenger, practically begging Takuto to give him a call and talk to him, or at least get some therapy. But Takuto insists that he’s okay, that he doesn’t want them to worry about him, and that he just hasn’t contacted them much because he’s busy with work.

V starts blaming himself for being unable to reach out to his son, but, when he realizes that Takuto got his self-blaming habit from him, and only blames himself further.

As for the other RFA members, Jumin thinks that Takuto needs time to grieve and that, if he doesn’t want to accept their help, there’s nothing they can do about it. Jaehee is disheartened but she reluctantly agrees, hoping that Takuto will go back to normal soon. Zen thinks that they should be doing more for him, and that, if they put enough effort into it, he will come around.

Yoosung might revert back to his old ways and question V on why he isn’t doing enough to help his own son. Seeing as Takuto is his cousin and everything he has left of Rika, I’m sure he's very protective of him...

Once they all get worried enough, Saeyoung tracks down Takuto with his hacking skills, but he doesn’t find anything suspicious, so they decide to respect his privacy. After all, V doesn’t want to get too obsessive and repeat the mistakes he made with Rika, so he decides to listen to Jumin’s advice and give Takuto some space, hoping he’s making the right choice.

Meanwhile, Takuto figures out that Shido is behind the conspiracy that took away his research, which only strengthens his resolve to keep everything a secret from the RFA. Shido is too similar to the Choi twins’ father, and Takuto is afraid that, if Saeyoung hears about this, he won’t let it go, which could bring back some awful memories from his childhood and the Mint Eye thing… Especially considering that Akechi is in a similar position to Saeran, except that, you know, at least his mother wasn’t deliberately cruel to him.

A lot of the sympathy that Takuto feels towards Akechi comes from his experience with the Choi twins. He can deduce that he’s being manipulated by Shido like how Saeran was manipulated by Rika, so he wants to save him just like how V saved the twins. That also applies to the Yoshizawa twins, since the two of them promised to always be together in pursuit of their dream, but Sumire was the “weaker” of the two and was secretly envious of Kasumi. All in all, the similarities are everywhere, which might, consciously or subconsciously, affect the way Takuto interacts with the PTs.

In any case, Takuto just wants to protect the PTs from the same kind of trauma that the RFA went through. But -- he isn’t like Rika, or so he tells himself. He’s convinced that his methods are right because they can save everyone without causing any more suffering. He’s pretty sure he’s sane (he’s not). Besides, Rika’s dream was originally pretty noble, so it should be fine as long as he doesn’t start drugging people, right?

(He will retraumatize them, hold them hostage, and brainwash them, though, because he doesn’t see it as such)

The third semester comes along. I’m sure you also know what happens here. Takuto gets a god complex, the PTs fight him, defeat him, steal his treasure, and they destroy his perfect reality.

After the change of heart, Takuto is crushed, so he goes back to V and MC and confesses the whole truth through tears. He profusely apologizes, fully aware of how he retraumatized all of the Phantom Thieves to guide them to ‘salvation’, not unlike what Rika did to the members of Mint Eye, and he takes responsibility, knowing that he should’ve asked for help much sooner.

V and MC are shocked and heartbroken, faced with the fact that their son suffered so much that he fell into insanity and no one even noticed. They feel as if, with all the trauma that the RFA has already gone through, they should’ve seen the warning signs, and they should’ve tried harder to help Takuto heal… but they know from experience there’s no guarantee that that would’ve solved anything, so it’s pointless to dwell in what-ifs.

V and MC listen to Takuto’s explanation. They don’t understand any of the cognitive psience stuff and they are sure that he’s delusional because of the whole reality thing, but they comfort him to the best of their abilities. MC tells Takuto that he’s not like Rika and that he can always make up for his past mistakes, while V assures him that it wasn’t his fault and that, if someone like V could get back on his feet after everything that happened with the Mint Eye, Takuto can do it too.

Takuto takes their advice to heart, choosing to leave counseling, seek therapy, and make amends with his former patients. The RFA supports him while he gets his life together (but Jumin didn’t teach him how to drive, of course… oh god please tell me Jumin didn’t teach him how to drive), and he begins (continues?) to volunteer for the association’s charity events, so that he can keep helping people in need. That’s around the time when the P5R ending happens.

And… yep. That’s pretty much it.

Bonus points if Takuto ends up introducing the RFA to the PTs and they all become a big, happy found family. Jaehee and Akiren can bond over coffee making, Yoosung and Ryuji can bond over games, Zen and Ann can bond over acting and modelling, Jumin and Makoto can bond over being robots, V and Yusuke can bond over art, Saeyoung and Futaba can bond over memes and hacking, Ray and Haru can bond over flowers, and Saeran and Akechi can bond over their hatred of their fathers, haha.

Anyways, this crack AU became way more serious and more wholesome than originally intended... Now I actually want this to be a thing, haha.

[violetbeachpod]

transcript: 9 - communication issues

Okay, so, we’re doing this again. Cool. Sup. It’s your girl.

No. No. That’s bad.

Charlotte, here. Cranor-Liu. From here. You know me. I know you. We’re friends. That’s--a thing that’s happening.

I have a better opening line. But first, a foreword. A preface? Not sure, not really giving two shits, but.

Cool.

So. Each of you individually texted me a potential opener for this. To be fair, and because they were all equally dumb and bad, I will read all of them individually.

Benji Ahuja, local small business owner and general huge nerd and also my worst enemy, but, like, in a friendly rivalry way, we are both so committed to this bit where we pretend to hate each other, okay, says: We got a real life possession on our hands, folks!

Corny. Bad. Sounds like a line from an 80s disaster movie, which, actually, is probably what you were going for.

I have never seen an 80s disaster movie. Was that 80s or 70s? Again, don’t really care. That’s rhetorical.

AJ Diggs, very good barista and very bad lab partner, yeah, dude, I am still bitter about that physics project from eighth grade where I had to write the whole paper at 3 AM, says: Did I miss anything?

He also used emojis in that, but I’ll spare him the embarrassment of reading out what they were. Actually--they were interrobangs, and then the 100 one a few times, as a joke, maybe? I don’t know if he knows what that one means. He’s not hip. He’s like a grandpa in a teen body. Wears the sweaters and everything. Not in the Macklemore way, which wouldn’t help him either, but in the actual grandpa way. He’s not even trying to be cool. He just dresses like a grandpa.

I love him very much. He is my dearest friend in the world. Thank you. Now, AJ, please never remind me that I said that.Because I can and will curse you and make you into a werewolf man or something. Cuz I’m evil and magical and can destroy you.

Robin Harper, writer and general icon: Can you maybe mention that my wedding was nice? I feel like Teresa didn’t acknowledge that enough. I’m kidding. LOL. Open it with, like. A message of concern. Say something nice, Charlotte. I love you. Hope you’re having a nice day. But. Please. Heart emoji. Heart emoji. Heart emoji.

Teresa literally told us not to be nice, so, uh, no. Love you too though.

Elaine Harper, crazy cat lady and also an icon: Dealing With Your Girlfriend From An Alternate Universe For Dummies is an easy book to write.

That’s--no one read those books. Did you read those books? Elaine, you’re legally obligated to tell me. Boom, roasted, whatever. I--that’s not even funny, Elaine, and you seemed to be, like, slightly cool, so, uh, thanks for ruining that illusion. I should have known, from the fact that you were getting married to Robin, but, alas, your cool vibes distracted me from that.

Teresa Marin, who sometimes gets possessed and who is also a student: Teresa Marin, more like Teresa Scarin’ me!

I absolutely refuse. No further comment. And, then, and here’s the interesting part:

Angie Thompson, student who wants, desperately, to be a singer-songwriter, but, like, who knows, maybe her music’s just not for me?: Teresa Marin, more like Teresa Scarin’ me!

Thinking about it, Angie probably sent that from both of their phones. Teresa’s not funny, but, uh, her jokes are better than that. I hope. Oh my God, I hope. Because Teresa is, like. Not a rhyming humor type of person. I know her well enough to know that, okay?

Anyway, so, uh, here’s my opener:

Can we learn how to, like, communicate like normal human goddamned beings about, like, the alternative universe that has entered into our lives? Like, I get not sharing out publicly, but we all know about it. We can, like, maybe tell each other about being possessed as soon as it happens the first time.

Look, my girlfriend, Mae Babson who, yes, is from an alternate universe, and who is also super cool and great and is my girlfriend and who is not a nerdlord, unlike you weirdasses and also me, was raised in a place where she cannot lie.

Which is sort of a cool thing, from, like, a moral standpoint, even though it was used to hurt her and those around her.  Y’know what I mean?

Listen, look, listen, maybe we as a group of friends can take a page out of the book of the evil villain or whatever we’re calling him and, like, tell each other the truth.

But that’s—whatever. Whatever. We can make a Google Doc or something? Maybe. As a solution to this whole info-sharing crisis we’re having with each other.

Okay. So.

How’s me? How’s Charlotte? How is she doing? How on top is she? Is she still killing it?

Of course she is. But let’s elaborate. We need elaboration, here.

Well. I’m directing a one act that I wrote. That’s cool. My first few pitches got rejected, but, uh, the current one’s pretty good, so. I’m cool with that. And this one hopefully won’t get ruined by paranormal happenings. So. That’s cool. It’s a subversion of vampire romance tropes and a subtle commentary on heteropatriarchy in YA fiction. Because I’m that good.

Uh. I got a job? That’s something. Just heard back yesterday, I’ve actually only told AJ so far, so. Cool? It’s at the Bean Zone, so. AJ’s training me. So that’ll be a fun experience for all of us, which is to say, AJ, I’m going to make your life hell and there is nothing you can do to stop me. Absolutely nothing. Because Amanda loves me.

Mae is finally coming out of her shell, a little bit. You guys are—thanks for being good to her. I’m being genuine here. It’s very difficult to, uh. Cope? I guess, for her, and you guys are being genuinely cool.

Once you got over the whole alternate universe, thing, I mean, like. Thanks for not grilling her ever, but. You need to—

Whatever. Whatever. I’m not about to get sappy. I don’t do sappy. I’m a huge badass, and, as such, I don’t get sappy. We can all accept this about me.

I’m about to update you on Weird Shit. Because that, assholes, is the point of these. I mean, you could maybe argue that this is, as a group of people who are generally terrible at being alive and interacting at other people, a way for us to interact with other people, but.

Nah.

This is for weird shit updates. Those and only those

So. Teresa has been getting possessed on and off for months. If you’ve somehow managed to forget, which I haven’t. And my memory’s not great, so, I’m assuming that you’ve all remembered that. That’s cool. Kinda scary, but cool. Good to have that particular knowledge secured in terms of Weird Shit That’s Going Down Annual, a magazine edited by me.

But.

Uh. Mae seems to be the only fully successful—y’know. transport of a person to this world. She’s not sure why. I think it’s because she’s just very good at everything, but. She broke into a museum and everything, like, pulled a heist and all. Which is very cute. Very cool.

She doesn’t have a double. Most other people who’ve tried—do. There’s not another Mae Babson. There is another me, another Teresa, you get it. I don’t know—and really, I don’t care about why there aren’t doubles of certain people. That’s not—that’s a stupid thing to spend time caring about. For me. You guys can go wild on it, but, honestly? I’m cool with there being a second me. Mae says she’s chill.

Presumably, she’s—she’s extremely chill. And Mae—Mae didn’t know her super well, I guess? Because I’m—I’m sure that she’d like her. Probably better.

Because, uh. She’d understand and everything. And she’s probably a little. Y’know. More—determined. Sharper. Y’know? Because she’s—

I should not get jealous of myself in an alternate universe. She probably has self-esteem issues too.

Doc David Diggs says I need to work on projection. I’ve been talking to him. Do we all talk to him? I know that Angie does. And AJ doesn’t. But. Yeah.

Uh. Other Weird Shit. Hm. Let’s get into that. That’s—going on. Certainly, certainly, def, def, obvi, obvi, y’know how it is. More blank-faced people—failed travelers, I guess. The board is still a thing. I’ve snuck into a few meetings, and, uh. They’re pulling, uh, some shit. I took notes and everything. I’m not even taking APUSH notes anymore, so we can see that this actually matters to me.

Also, I still have a 93 in that class, so, uh, guess who’s on top? Yeah. I am a genius, thank you, thank you, thank you.

So. Notes. Notes on notes. Hell yeah.

So, I kept a chart of this, so.

Names of people on the board that I can make out are:

Hamish South

Katherine (not sure if it’s with a c or a k or a y or whatever? that’s a bad name to have. don’t name your child catherine. please) Brooks

Frederick Lewis

Daniel Wexton

Lisa Barnes

And there are a few others, but I can’t get their names. Mae doesn’t know any of the names, says that they’re way too secretive over there, so. Cool. You know how it is.

I have a few sketches of their faces, but they’re not great and I kind of have an issue with noses, so Mae can’t recognize them. None of them have doubles.

Daniel Wexton is the one who grabbed me, I think. Same voice and everything. Can’t quite make out his features, but.

These are the bad guys. That should be, uh, pretty obvious. But they’re the bad guys! That’s cool to know! Cue graphic, cheesy music, the more you know, and all the rest. Eugh. That’s—

So. Cool. We know who we’re going after.

Okay, more notes. Evil plans:

-Necromancy. The rest turned to sirens and other really painful noises, but I got necromancy? so? That’s important. I think it’s to get our boy Andy back, because this is very much a cult, which, cool, we’re infiltrating a cult, and by we’re, I mean me, and by infiltrating, I mean spying on, because I’m not technically getting into the cult itself. I’m just listening. You get me.

-Cut back on drama spending. That’s an evil plan. It’s the evil plan in every Muppet movie, and the board is doing it, so it counts. And yes, I do love the Muppets. I have emotions. I’m only human. I have a heart. None of you are allowed to repeat this to anyone ever. But, anyways, how fucked up is that? Not only are they trying to kill people, they’re also trying to take away my whole Thing, so. Yeah! Love this!

-Eliminate travelers from their place to ours, which makes sense, but which is, uh terrifying. Not much else to say, but it’s. Y’know. A thing that’s happening.

-Benji’s name came up one time but I got bored, so I stopped writing. Also the janitor walked in so I had to run before I got caught by anyone?

And that’s all that’s really relevant.

Um. I don’t really know how to end this? I guess--I just have to reaffirm that we know who the hell we’re investigating, and maybe fighting? Is this a showdown thing? Will there be a climactic battle sequence? Cuz I’m good at those. I can punch. Ask AJ.

So. Yeah. Update complete. This is Charlotte, signing off for now, cuz, uh. I--are we still doing sign-offs? Should I get a, uh. Like a normal one? Or one that we all use? Because I don’t trust you to come up with those things, because you’re clearly all less charming than me.

So. Yeah. We’re not doing that.

I do love you guys. Stay safe. Tell me if something happens.

Bye.

[greyias]

How will Grey react to Theron's new horrific hair? Will she laugh at it or just stare at it dumbfounded?

I’m pretty sure this is 100% canon how things are going to go down in-game. I’m just really good at guessing like that.

It was the moment Theron had been dreading since his shuttle had left the surface of Umbara. The usually perfectly pinned ponytail in disarray, her cheeks flushed from the exertion of the battles she had just fought, and wide blue eyes focused on only one thing in the room: him.

And for a moment everything just stopped, as even now just the sight of her still could take his breath away and make him forget about everything. And that was a bad thing because if he forgot what he was doing, if he let himself slip even the slightest, then all of his work to infiltrate the Order would be for nothing—and she’d never be safe. She had already gotten hurt, nearly killed, because he hadn’t seen the trap they’d laid on Iokath. He wasn’t about to let that happen again.

He needed to go, before he blew the carefully crafted cover he and Lana had put together. And that was exactly what he had planned to do, just put one foot in front of the other and flee like a fleeing thing. So imagine his surprise when his mouth opened instead and asked the question that had been bothering him since he’d laid eyes on her: “What are you wearing?”

“Me?” She asked incredulously.  “‘What am I wearing?’ That’s seriously the first thing out of your mouth?”

“But, the cape, the ridiculous shoulder pads,” Theron was definitely not whining, “they were so cool! Now you just look like a Jedi with a fondness for the color red.”

“I am a Jedi—and you said you hated that armor!”

“That’s because the clasps on it make it trickier than a Zeltrosian bra to remove!”

“How do you know how tricky—you are not helping your case here!”

Oh, shit. He should have just run. In fact, that was a brilliant plan. He was going to do that. Now. “I have to go.”

“Theron, wait, we can talk about this!”

“There’s nothing to talk about I already told you that the Alliance is rotting—”

But apparently his villain speech wasn’t going to work this time around. 

“It’s normal when a man gets to a certain age, he starts to feel the need to experiment, to change things up, try to make life exciting again.”

“A certain age?”

“Everyone does call you ‘Old Man Shan’. Well, they’re now calling you ‘Dirty Filthy Traitor Shan’ even though I keep telling them to stop. But I figured it was the first one that might have set you off.”

“Please don’t tell me you think this is some sort of midlife crisis.”

“It explains everything.”

“No, it doesn’t! I’m evil now! I’m a bad man, you should stay away. Far, far away!”

She wasn’t listening to him. “The the heavy drinking, the mood swings, the inexplicable and sudden need to destroy public property and try to ruin every personal relationship in your life, the need to try and refresh your image—”

“I recall your pep talks being more effective in the past.”

“This is happening because I only offered you one fleet of warships, isn’t it?”

“No!”

“I can give you two. Or three. Really we have like all of Iokath at this point so—”

“I don’t need a fleet, woman!”

“What about a Corellian cruiser? I hear they come in red—oh wait, you don’t like the color red anymore, do you?”

“What are you talking about?”

“Theron, I love you. You can tell me anything.” She was managing to keep pace with him and laid a gentle hand on his arm. “This is a safe space.”

“This is a literal war zone.” 

He yanked his arm away, because if he let it linger there too long he was going to say to hell with this stupid undercover assignment and let the galaxy take care of itself for once. Except he wasn’t capable of that at all, so scratch that. 

But he missed Odessen. And his bed. And his real jacket. This one was itchy and too long and made his shoulders look way too small — like they could actually fit through doorways. He’d had to overcompensate his disguise with his hair to try and look more intimidating. And it was working! He knew this from the looks the House Inrokini soldiers kept giving him.

“I was speaking metaphorically. I’m listening, Theron, I’m here for you, all you have to do is stop this nonsense and come home.”

“I…” Damn it, why did she have to be so nice all the time? Didn’t she know that love and understanding was his greatest weakness? “I can’t.”

“Yes, you can, everything will be okay. We’ll get the finest deprogrammers—I mean doctors—and they’ll help you see that you don’t need to join a cult to feel complete and whole—”

“I didn’t join a cult!”

She just looked at him. 

Oh, right. His cover. “I mean they’re not a cult! We’re just doing what needs to be done to bring peace to the Galaxy.”

“Of course you are, but maybe you just need better friends—like all of the ones waiting back home in front of the intervention sign. Even Grandmaster Satele came.”

“I don’t need an interven—wait, my mother’s there?”

“And Jace too! And the ghost of Darth Marr for that matter, even though I don’t recall inviting him. Let me tell you, that made things awkward—I’m getting sidetracked—what I’m trying to say is we’re all really worried about you!”

That was—oddly touching. (And weird. Why was Marr’s ghost still hanging around his mom?) And more importantly, why the hell hadn’t Lana put a stop to this nonsense? She knew what was going on. Surely she could wrangle one well-meaning, overly helpful Jedi and maintain his cover while he was off saving the galaxy. For that matter, why was everyone just waiting for the Alliance Commander to return from Copero with him in tow? It seemed like there was better use of everyone’s time than standing in a room with little envelopes of written confessions. 

Or maybe he was putting too much thought into this. He really needed to finish running away before anyone noticed he had no actual intention of trying to injure, maim, or murder the woman so lovingly (and quite unnecessarily) trying to reach out to him as if he’d gone off the deep end. Apparently he gave a really compelling and convincing villain speech. Score one for the SIS method acting course he’d taken.

The sounds of battle had grown distant, although blaster fire and the occasional explosion still rocked the ground. It was actually impressive they had managed to carry on a conversation as long as they had without being interrupted by the fierce dogfight between forces. Beyond these blast doors was the corridor that led to the private hangar where he’d parked his shuttle.  But he’d never be able to escape the planet and finish delving into the Order’s real plans (not to mention smoke out the real mole back on base) if he didn’t ditch his well-meaning tagalong. Maybe if he asked her really nicely…

“Just go home and forget about me, Commander.”

Okay, maybe that was more of an order than a request, but he was really distracted by the thought that Darth Marr had insisted on attending his intervention. Theron really needed to know how a ghost had managed to write out a confession on flimsiplast, and if Jace had attempted to start a fist fight with Satele’s new incorporeal bestie. 

“Theron, I could never forget you.”

Damn it, she was going to force him to do something traitory and nefarious again so he could get away, wasn’t she? Being able to finish this plan and get things back to normal would have been a lot easier had she been let in on the fact that there was an actual plan. It was almost like this extremely elaborate ruse wasn’t as well-thought and brilliant as he and Lana originally had envisioned. Come to think of it, why hadn’t they brought the Commander in on their plot to uncover the true traitor within their midst?

Oh right, because she giggled inappropriately every time she attempted to lie. She would have snickered the entire time he was giving his villain speech on the train instead of looking at him like a kicked puppy. That would have convinced no one. There were definite downsides to picking the most benevolent goodie two-shoes in the galaxy as the leader of their no-longer-rebel faction.

“I will always love you,” she continued on, oblivious to Theron’s internal struggle, “even if it looks like a womp rat died on your head.”

That brought him out of his melodramatic sulking. “Hey!”

“Don’t worry, I’ve bought you a whole closet full of really fashionable hats—”

“You do realize this is my exact same hair, right? I just shaved off the sides to make it look cooler—I mean more intimidating!”

“Is that why you shaved a thong on the back?”

“A… what?”

“You have looked into a mirror, right?”

“I don’t need a—“ She magically produced a mirror and he proceeded to crane his head awkwardly to see what she was referring to. “Those sons of bitches!”

“Language, Theron!”

“I joined a cult, I don’t have to watch my language anymore!” He cursed again and traced the V-shaped mark down the back of his head that looked far too similar to women’s lingerie to be a mere coincidence. He was going to kill those guys when he got back. Okay, that was actually the point of this whole thing, but now he had another reason to take these evil bastards down. “Stupid hazing rituals — I should have known that wasn’t the traditional ‘Welcome to the Order Cackle’!”

She frowned. “Wait… ‘the Order’? What Order?”

“I’ve said too much.” He quickly moved away from her mirror and the horrors it contained, feeling a new and urgent need to exact vengeance on a couple of cultists and their vibrorazers.

“Where are you going?”

“To avenge my hair! And get back my jacket!”

Oh, and save the galaxy and Alliance too. But first, those bastards were going to pay…

Or TL;DR – outwardly she’s more concerned that he’s seemingly cracked and is acting like some cheesy Bond villain than the Theron she knows and loves. Inwardly, she is aghast that he would shave off that beautiful hair, but is also confused by the feelings the new do and the Evil Jacket™ are stirring up.