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[inmyheaddd]

half asleep - grayson hawthorne x reader

a/n: someone lmk how to acquire a sleepy grayson to cuddle with for myself pls wc: 368 masterlist

you were wide awake, your leg strewn across grayson’s torso and his arms wrapped around you. he was out like a light, and you should’ve been too. 

you blame the 2 extra coffees you had in the morning. in your defense, you were a walking zombie by 1pm, desperate for a boost of energy.

now, you had been laying there silently awake for an hour; it was impossible to go back to sleep.

you thought you were hilarious, so you slowly got out of his grip, propping yourself up on one elbow. 

“grayson, i need you to buy germany for me.” you whispered as you patted his shoulder.

you were spewing absolute nonsense, playing a prank on your boyfriend that you had seen other people do online.

“what?” he muttered. his slight pout, and the way his brows were furrowed with his eyes still closed made possibly the most adorable sight you’d ever seen.

you tried your hardest to not laugh, “you need to buy germany from the store. i asked you last week.”

“okay, okay, ill do it. just…” he patted his arm around looking for you, “come back to sleep, sweetheart.” he mumbled as he blindly reached for your waist again to pull you in closer, but you stayed put.

“wait but, what about the purple frogs in italy?”

“i’ll get them.” he said with a sleepy groan, “tomorrow.” he pulled you in closer successfully this time, and he grabbed the back of your knee, pulling it over his lower half as he wrapped his other arm around your shoulder.

you were shaking with laughter, biting your bottom lip trying not to wake him up.

his breaths were starting to steady and then you saw his brows furrow again. after a beat of silence, he blinked one open eye at you. 

“sweetheart, germany? as in the whole country?” 

you met his gaze sheepishly, holding back a laugh. “purple frogs in italy? are you alright?” he continued. it was impossible not to laugh now.

“i was just messing with you,” you said in between giggles, “i’m sorry,” you placed a hand on his cheek, and he smiled sleepily at the sound of your laughter, closing his eyes again momentarily. 

“i’ll try and get germany for you. no garauntees, my love, but i’ll do my best.” he mumbled sleepily as he brought your head to his chest, kissing the top of it. 

“what about the purple frogs in italy?” you muttered into his chest with a smile.

he let out a sleepy chuckle, “absolutely not.”

taglist: @x-liv25-jamieswife @wish-i-were-heather @thecircularlibrary @whatsamongus

@sweetlikeanangel @littlemissmentallyunstable @sheisntyou @emelia07

@anintellectualintellectual @tornqdowarnings @maybxlle

[littlemissmentallyunstable]

there’s been lots of requests and comments so here it is PART 3!!! (SHE’S HERE first anon, hope you survived this long second anon and it was not a dream third anon, I’m posting/making it now fourth and fifth anon)

some of you were going feral for part 2 so I hope this lives up the expectation 😭😭 if not I’m severely sorry

title: the dancer and the angel part 3

pairing: grayson hawthorne x reader

synopsis: grayson has just admitted to kissing lyra kane, the girl you’d been worried about, the girl that was stunning, the girl he said didn’t matter… he chose her over you so now what??

parts: part 1 part 2 part 4

warnings: swearing, SPOILERS FOR TGG

a/n: okay so I hate switching POVs but I felt it was necessary here and I know the start is the same as the part 2 but in Gray’s POV but trust me there is lot more

tag list: @tornqdowarnings @whatsamongus @wish-i-were-heather @inmyheaddd @never-enough-novels @sweetlikeanangel @midiosaamor @sweetreveriee @emelia07 @f4iry-bell @zaraaaabear @thoughtdaughter3 @benny1989fredd @elysianwayy77 @maybxlle @sheisntyou @anintellectualintellectual @aleatorio1234 @adalia-jaycee @off-to-the-r4ces @lyra-kane @reminiscentreader @lyrakanefanatic @imaseabear @elizaa31

GRAYSON’S POV

Guilt has chewed me up and spat me out the whole walk back to our shared room. There’s a pulsating lump in my throat that aches relentlessly, reminding me of what I’ve done. I am a terrible person. I never deserved her and now I’ve done the worst thing I could’ve possibly done, that anyone on this whole planet could’ve ever done. And she will never forgive me for it. I wish there was a way to turn back time and alter certain events. As soon as the time machine is invented, no doubt by my very own brother Xander, I’m coming back to moments before now to stop my idiot brain from-

I can’t even think it. Maybe it’s because it makes it more real. It’s like the last few moments of my life have been erased from my brain, it’s a blank canvas and I have no paints. I know what I did but I can’t remember exact details. Still, I can taste her on my lips, an over sweet taste that was almost too sickly has now morphed into something bitter. Her perfume lingers on my clothes and adds to my ever growing headache. I don’t want to smell her, I don’t want the reminder of the awful human I have become. The monster that now inhabits my body, lives in my skin, breathes my air and poisons the people I love. The ones I truly love.

Y/n. At one point she was the only reason I was still existing, still carrying on. She somehow managed to give me the fight to keep carrying on. I got up most days because I knew I would get to see her face. And now I’m going to throw everything away, our whole relationship. Everything we’ve been through or planned to go through together. It will reduced to nothing in a few minutes.

I’m outside the door, my feet have carried me here through muscle memory. I must go in, I must face her I’m aware but I’m afraid. I’ve never felt so pathetic. I wonder if she is still asleep. Though, I can’t work out whether I’d rather she be awake or asleep. I don’t think I could bear to look at her angelic feature either way. Those wide eyes, round lips, heavenly- I can’t bear it, I’m going to lose her, all of her.

I fiddle around with the key, hoping the door will just never unlock so I don’t have to face this. The mechanism clicks, mocking me. I step in silently and face the door to lock back up again. I don’t understand why, I know I’ll be kicked out in a matter of seconds, what good will a locked door be? And yet I’m still facing the door, fumbling with the key, my back towards her. Though I can hear her getting out of bed. She’s awake. My body’s immediate response is to go into a state of paralysis. I can’t move as the guilt ridden cement hardens over my body, creating an outer shell of the cruel creature I’ve become. Her body is behind mine. I can feel her bright presence radiating her usual tentative nature.

“Are you okay?” I hear her whisper as she touches my arm so gently it stings.

It stings so sharply because I know what I’ve done. The shameful crime I’ve committed. I jerk away suddenly.

“Are you hurt?” she asks, deep concern in her tone.

It kills me. It’s a poisoned dagger wedged deep within my heart, hitting every vital artery. Her voice is so soft, so melodic. She cares so much, too much and I’m about to destroy it all. And as much as I could not say a word I couldn’t live a lie, the guilt would eat me alive. How could I look her in the eye and tell her she’d always been the only one when I know she hadn’t? She’d already noticed earlier today my distant mood. She had always been observant, vigilant about those things concerning me and I’d always been grateful. I wouldn’t have that anymore. Lyra had been on my mind earlier and I couldn’t tell her. Now she would realise.

“No,” I reply.

My voice is unfamiliar to myself, it’s sharp and blunt. It sounds horribly harsh. I could feel it hurt her, the air ripples with a touch of dimness when I hurt her. Even with my back to her it’s obvious to me. I know her so well, too well and from this day on we might drift to perfect strangers. That thought hurts me more than anything.

“Where have you been?” she says. Her voice so sweet, so innocent, cruelly naïve.

I don’t want to break her, I don’t want to do it. It would be like smashing a glass ballerina. Something so beautiful, something so delicate should be preserved not purposely broken. I force my eyes to meet hers. I immediately regret it. The soft mellow colour all melts into one, clawing at my heartstrings and ripping the organ to shreds. She’s so beautiful. How had I ever looked at any other? How had I let myself?

Suddenly I’m drowning in guilt. I don’t know how, it just comes over me suddenly. Like a tidal wave I had my back to. I’ve been swept under by an endless ocean of shame. My lungs swollen full of my own black sin. I don’t know how but I manage to choke out two shaky words.

“I’m sorry.”

My voice cracks. My voice never cracks. She knows that. I’m sturdy, I’m strong, I’m the rock that never breaks and here I am. Here I am crumbling into dust. She’s too smart to miss the signs, she’s too clever not to immediately know something so horribly wrong, her mind is too sharp not to have worked half of it out. She’d already been suspicious of Lyra. She’d already seen what might happen between us even before I did, before it did actually happen.

“Gray?” she asks, my name sounding too sweet on her tongue. The next time she says it will taste bitter, I’m sure of it. She barely whispers the word but I hear her, it rings in my mind. It forever will.

I’m full of pure regret and guilt, it wracks my soul, shaking me relentlessly back and forth until I’m dizzy with it. Remorse’s doors suddenly burst wide open, ready for my grand entrance. My hopes and dreams snicker and smirk smugly as I walk down the runway, my head hanging in embarrassment.

I need to tell her. My heart races in my chest and there’s a lump stuck in my throat, so large it’s started to block my airways. I don’t know how to get the words out, I don’t know how to talk. I feel like I’m suffering some sort of aneurysm. She looks at me, her eyebrows pinched in and eyes narrowed and then I see it. Her eyebrows part and slowly sink. She knows already.

“Tell me,” she murmurs, her voice of an angel shaking.

I close my eyes, trying to suppress the tears. I haven’t cried in years I’ve forgotten this feeling, this heavy weighted agony that ripples through me causing water to infiltrate my eyes. I bite the inside of my cheek and still my shaking hands.

“I’m sorry,” I tell her, an uninvited raw desperation ripping through my voice, “I never wanted to hurt you, I never meant for it to happen, I-“

“Tell me,” she grits through her teeth sharply, her eyes glitter so beautifully fierce and fiery, like she wants to kill.

But I know she’s trying to steady her rising sadness by covering up with her fury. I can see through her, like she can see through me. I freeze and the pause elongates. The aching silence is deadly, it’s fatal. I wish she didn’t have to make me say it.

“I kissed her,” I murmur, the words making me feel sick as I say them.

“Who?” she asks, he tone low and ferocious, “who did you kiss? I want to hear you say it.”

I’m twisting a knife into her heart and I know it. But she wants me to cut deeper. She’s a woman of principle, I’ve already hurt her, I might as well do the job properly in her eyes. And I can’t deny her this. Not I’ve stripped her of her dignity, her trust, her love, her everything.

“I kissed Lyra,” I whisper, suddenly aware of the dampness on my cheeks.

A sour taste fills my mouth. The words send lightning sparks across my jaw, sending ribbons of agony down the sides of my face. The truth hurts. Literally. Tears are rolling the side of my face, but I don’t bring my hand to wipe them and nor do I stop them. I’ve never felt more broken.

But she doesn’t care, there is not pity in her eyes. Good. I don’t want he to pity me. She should hate me. She should want me to miserable and hope for me to have a lifetime of the torture I’ve just forced her to endure.

“Get out,” she murmurs, the anger bringing out her natural stunning features. A flicker of boldness in her eyes, the striking angles of her eyebrows, her strong thick lashes and her full lips.

“I’m sorry.” they’re the only words I remember how to say, through my internal fit of torment.

I expect her to hit me around the face, a good strong punch I know she can make or a sharp smack that’ll leave a red hand mark pressed against my cheek. I imagine she might scream at me and ask me all the questions I wish I had answers to. But she does none of that. She only looks at me darkly and utters two last words.

“Leave Grayson.”

I can hear the tears she’s trying to hold back, through the numb façade. I know her better than she’ll ever realise. But it’s not fair for me to stay, not after this. She’s only asking one thing of me when she should be doing so much more. So I do. I turn my back on her again. And I leave.

***

Tears pummel down my cheeks like never before. I can’t remember the last time I cried. I don’t think I’ve ever cried like this. I’m blinded by them as I stumble sideways. I don’t know where I’m going. I stand on the edge of the cliff and sink to my knees, letting out a loud guttural scream. I’m there until my throat is so raw I can’t feel it. I bite my lip so hard it draws blood. And then I’m up again and running, following a path my footsteps are dragging me towards. I can’t think straight, I’m dizzy with pain. Before I know it I’m outside the safe house on the island. My hands tremor on the handle and I swing open the door, falling to the floor for my sobs to take me over. My chest aches and burns and tightens. That’s when I realise I can’t breathe properly. I fumble around for my phone, a tear splashing into the illuminated screen. With uncontrollably shaking hands, I typed no words. Just three numbers.

911

***

The wait feels like years, maybe even decades. Each second taunts me, with a mocking tick. I’d crumbled into the corner of the room at some point and stayed there, curled up and choking on my own sorry sobs. What had I done? What had I done? What had I done?

The question circles around my head like the nostalgia of a distorted tune of a merry go round. I’ve never made such a big mistake and my life and deep down there’s a sinking sensation that is telling me I’m not going to be able to make this better. I sob, loud harsh sobs that hurt my lungs and knock the air out of my stomach. My whole being shakes with every strangled noise that escapes my lips. Grieving. I’m grieving over something I chose to throw away. It’s cruelly ironic. But I think part of me is also grieving the good man I once thought myself to be, that she made me believe I could be.

I turned my back on the one and only person in this world who just cared about me, took me for who I am and believed I could do anything. She only wanted the best, she only wanted happiness and she deserved so much more and here I am, stabbing her in the back and dancing in her blood like a madman. She was my everything and I managed to mess it up, just like everything else in my life. I can’t have normal relationships, I can’t do something without messing it up. I’m one big screw up the opposite of how the old man raised me to be. He’s looking down on me now and I can feel his disappointment, like an infection coursing through my bloodstream. I failed him, I failed my brothers, I’ve failed her, I’ve failed myself.

She thought I was better, she believed I could be more than his expectation. And I was stupid enough to believe it, encourage it and let her belive the lie too. We’re all idiots.

I can recite her favourite song, her favourite flower, her favourite food and favourite colour. I can tell you all about her favourite novels and how she orders her books on an endless bookshelf. I know that she tells people her favourite film is ‘it’s a wonderful life’ but it’s actually secretly ‘tangled’. I know she prefers to stay inside and cuddle under blankets rather than have a night out. I know she’d rather reason a thousand books than watch a thousand movies. I know she wanted a library in her dream house and two, maybe three children with her husband and I know she’d sometimes debate about getting a cat as well. I know how she loves brownie batter more than the actual brownies and can’t sleep with any lights on. I know she still uses the bunny rhyme to tie her shoelaces and how she fiddles with her collarbone when she’s nervous. I know exactly what diamond she wanted in her engagement ring and her favourite country. I know what people she despises and I know what people she adores. I know every inch of her face, every hair on her head, every sparkle in her eyes and every cell on her skin.

I know her.

I know her, but that can’t help me now. Pain ripples across the left side of my chest and my hand clamps over it as I grit my teeth to try and bear it. I hear the door creek open and can’t tell whether it comforts me or not.

“Grayson pookie!” Xander calls out, “we’re here.”

His cheerful voice doesn’t provide me with the cushion to this pain I thought it might.

“And we have some in incredibly strong whisky,” Jameson adds, I can here the mischievous grin in his voice, it’s been the same all of his life.

“My nose hairs are officially burnt off,” Xander agrees.

I can’t speak. I try to call out for them but the words die in my swollen throat.

“Where are you Gray?” Nash calls out, he sounds a little more worried than the other two but is concealing it well.

“Here,” my voice is hoarse and laboured, even I can’t recognise it.

The mood immediately shifts, you can feel it. The air becomes tainted with concern as their footsteps approach my cowering figure. The case of whiskey is dropped as there is an audible thunk as it hits the floor. I can feel their bodies enveloping around mine creating something of a circle of safety. I look up to worried face and shiny eyes.

“Help me,” I gasp for air, greedily trying to gulp down the oxygen that I feel so deprived of, “please.”

“We’re here to help you Gray,” Nash murmurs softly. His voice had always been something comforting, especially when I was younger. I wonder if he will be so kind when I tell him what I’ve done. He’s going to hate me, there’s nothing he despises more than a man who can’t respect a woman.

I shake my head and choke out another struggling sob, instead of the words I don’t know how to say. Jameson’s eyes flit between mine and Nash’s, the concern rippling across his features. He’s never looked this concerned for me in his life. I think to all the times as children I’d helped him settle after a nightmare and wiped his tears that he hated falling when the old man had humiliated him. Oh how the tables had turned. Now it was my little brother wiping my tears.

“What’s wrong?” he asks, his touch so gentle it shocks me.

“I can’t-“ I barely get out, wrapping my hands around my neck.

“Gray…” he trails off, unmasked emotion hitting his face like a train.

“I can’t breathe,” I wheeze as the invisible blanket that was set out to suffocate me tightens over my nose and mouth.

“Hey, Gray, look at me,” Nash says, his voice smooth and reassuring, “in and out okay, in and out.”

“I can’t,” I pant, my limbs shaking embarrassingly uncontrollably.

Xander takes both of my hands into his and squeezes them until they still, “yes you can, follow Nash’s instructions okay?”

“Slowly, do it with me,” Nash nods, “in through your nose and out through your mouth.”

I do. In and out, a rhythmic pattern. Each time Nash reminds me how to breathe. There’s an aura of calmness about his voice that lulls my panic into a narcoleptic sleep. Once my breathing is halfway regulated I look at him, dead in the eye, with shaking sorrowful lips.

“I fucked up,” I sob, “I fucked up and I don’t know what to do.”

They all share a look, this is the worst state they’ve seen me and we all know it. I begin to pathetically sob uncontrollably once again, the feelings building up in my chest and tearing me apart from the inside out. It’s like a rabid pack of wolves had been set loose to feed on my internal organs. I don’t know how to stop the ocean of tears, I don’t know how to shut my mind off, I don’t know how to help myself. Reel myself in from this abominable mess I’ve become. I’m hyperventilating, my chest throbbing up and down unevenly. Nash nods towards Jameson, a short, soft, sharp nod of approval.

“Hey! Calm down!” Jameson snaps, giving me a hard slap around the face, “snap out of this!”

The shock shuts me up and the sting stops my tears. I’m back to reality instead of a wallowing mess. Nash must’ve been approving the slap I realise in the sudden cleared head I’d obtained

“Sorry,” Jameson mumbles at me, looking a little guilty.

I massage my jaw, “no I think I needed that.”

He grimaces and then softens his tone, “what happened Gray?”

I tense, growing very still, “I can’t say it out loud, I can’t, I’m awful, I’m horrible-“

“What happened?” Nash drawls.

I choke out yet another unnatural sound. Seems the slap didn’t snap me hard enough into reality. I exhale slowly. I have to say it, now or never.

“I kissed Lyra.”

The words hurt even more this time, that they did when I’d admitted it to y/n. Neither one of my brothers can mask their honest reaction.

“Oh fuck,” Jameson blurts out, “you cheated?”

Anger. He’s fuming with me. I can see the rage trailing through his eyes and blossoming into his expression.

“I didn’t mean to,” I reply, feeling like a small child.

Jameson’s eyes widen and fury flashes across his face, “how can you not mean-“

Nash shoots him a look and his mouth glues shut. Then he turns to me and I can’t quite read him yet. I gulp.

“No one does that kind of thing for no reason,” he says sternly, “I never thought you’d be the one of the four of us to ever do that, seems I was mistaken little brother.”

Disappointment. He’s disappointed. A horrible sinking feeling settles in my stomach. Nash is disappointed in me. It’s one of the worst feelings imaginable. There had only been few times in my life when he had been and I remember the feeling all too well. Shame has me in a chokehold an it’s succeeding in strangling me. I can‘t bring myself to meet his eyes, I don’t want to see that look I can feel is on his face, that look of pure disapproval.

“How did she find out?” Xander asks quietly.

Shock. He hadn’t said anything until now, but his lips had been slightly parted and he’d paled a little. He never thought I’d do this to anyone, he’s yet another person I’ve let down.

“I told her,” I murmur, “the guilt was consuming me.”

“As it should,” Jameson snaps, twitching with a fiery ferocity.

“Jamie,” Nash says, trying to keep some kind of diplomacy.

“No,” he growls, “you don’t do that to a girl, your girl, you can’t do that!”

“Don’t take the moral highground now,” I spit.

“When you’ve cheated on your girlfirend? Yeah I think I will,” he replies, the bitterness rolling off of his tongue like a deadly poison. He doesn’t know I’ve already poisoned myself with my own actions, his words can’t hurt me.

“I didn’t mean to,” I falter.

“Bullshit,” he grits through his teeth, in two definitive and threatening symbols.

“Careful Jamie,” Nash warns.

“All this is your fault anyway,” I continue, ignoring the warning.

“So it’s my fault, you kissed another girl, yeah, okay Gray,” he nods his head with a sarcastic smile.

“It is!” I exclaim, throwing my hands in the air, “if you hadn’t locked me in a room with her-“

“So it’s my fault you couldn’t keep up dick under control,” he quips, interrupting me.

“You could’ve locked me with my one of my sisters but of course you just had choose the only girl who isn’t related to me,” I seethe.

“Odette isnt related to you,” Xander pipes up. I’d forgotten he was there, that anyone besides me and Jameson were there.

“Odette is old enough to be my grandmother,” I scowl at him, immediately feeling bad as the words leave my lips, but don’t dwell on it as I turn back to Jameson, “why did you make me a player in your sick excuse of a game?”

“You can’t use the game as an excuse,” he laughs darkly.

“I will,” I reply sharply, “this is your fault and Avery’s fault too.”

“Avery? Don’t make me laugh,” he rolls his eyes.

“The game never should’ve been created by her,” I yell, “that’s why I’m in this mess!”

“No, you’re in this mess because of you,” he shouts back, “but don’t you dare bring Avery in to this it’s not her fault.”

I feel like I’m one of those circus acts, the ones that lay on a spinning board and get knives hurled at them. Only in my case the knives are the truth and they actually hit me.

“Why did you make me a player?” I ask quieter now, my voice hoarse, “why?”

“I didn’t know making you a player would result in this,” he says.

“It was so irreverent,” I snap becoming angrier by the second, a sudden burst of red overriding any rational sense in my head, “I never needed to play.”

“You can’t pin this on me Gray, if it didn’t happen with Lyra, who knows who else it would’ve happened with,” he hisses.

“So you think I’m just like this? You think this is me?” I ask him, prodding the hollow space where my heart used to be.

“I didn’t before….” he trails off, sighing, “but now I don’t know what the fucking think of you.”

“Jamie,” Nash repeats again, in the same warning tone as before. We both ignore him.

“Just because you and Avery are all peaches and roses-“

“Leave Avery out of your anger issues,” he roars defensively.

“No,” I counter, raising an eyebrow, mirroring his usual argument demeanour, “you think you’re so perfect now you’ve got your dream girl and the two of you are so much better off than the rest of us, because your love is undeniable or whatever bullshit people feed you about it-“

Jameson’s features twitch for a split second. He’s hurt, but won’t show it. He’ll refuse but I know that it hit a nerve that won’t heal for a long time. I stop mid-sentence.

“I am far from perfect, I think we both know that,” he says, in a low voice, “look you’re hurting, I get it, but I’m not going to mollycoddle you and tell you it’s okay when it’s not. I’m not going to stand here and lie to your face because as your brother that would be the worst possible thing for me to do to you.”

“My brother would try and understand what it’s like from my side,” I say, desperation clawing at my voice.

“You’re looking for a fight Grayson and it’s not going to end well, not with me,” he warns, shaking his head.

“Maybe I do want a fight, but you know you do too,” I growl rolling up my sleeves, “so fine, I’ll give you a fight Jamie.”

“I don’t want a fight, I want some justice for y/n,” he states simply, “she did nothing to deserve that Gray, she’s been so good to you, the sweetest soul on this earth and she’s helped you through a lot of shit and this is how you’re repaying her?”

“Jameson,” Nash says.

He ignores him for the third time and I can see his calm facade beginning to drop, “you think because you called a 911 and you’re here crying that I should feel sorry for you?”

“I thought you were going to be here for me,” I reply numbly, my tone dead, “clearly I’m mistaken.”

“I can’t be there for someone with no morals,” he replies, “you cheated and you’re the one who’s upset about it, how do you think she feels?”

“You think I don’t know her?” I fire back, my throat burning, “you think I don’t know exactly what she’s doing right now? I hate myself, I hate myself for doing what I did!”

“Good you should!” he screams back.

Before I know it I feel myself charges towards him, ready to throw a good punch but Nash and Xander launch onto me to quickly and managing to hold me back. Nash’s grip is so tight I don’t dare try and budge.

“Out. Now.” Nash says sharply to Jameson, “go and cool off.”

His tone sends a shiver down my spine that I won’t admit to. Jameson opens his mouth to argue.

“Jameson.”

He skulks away, with a sullen face. We all wait frozen until the door has been slammed shut. Nash lets my arm go, dropping it harshly and Xander follows suit.

“And you’re no better,” he turns to me, placing his cowboy hat on a nearby surface, “I’m only sending him away because you can’t be left alone in this mess and so the two of you don’t rip each other to pieces.”

Silence stills the room. His voice echoes but makes no sound all at the same time.

“Take a second, take a breath and we’re going to talk this through like adults,” he says, “if you want to carry on being a child then leave. Calm down, you’re not a toddler having a tantrum, you’re a grown man, act like it.”

Nash has a way of snapping me back to reality. I nod shakily.

“Talk.”

I begin, “I don’t even know why I kissed her, I didn’t mean to it just-“

“Happened?” he guesses, “no little brother, that doesn’t just happen.”

“The I don’t know Nash,” I say, tipping my head back and resting it on the wall behind me.

I hadn’t meant for it to happen. I didn’t want it to happen. It just did. She was there, just stood there. Her hands looped naturally around the back of my neck, warm and gentle, “someone sent me that ticket Grayson. I thought it was Avery but if it wasn’t…”

She trails off, her voice small and tentative. Her golden eyes filled with the utmost worry. I wanted her to know she’d be okay, that she’d have someone to keep her safe. Her arms get more comfortable around my neck. She’d felt it too, the electrifying spark between us. It was exhilarating but something about it was off, synthetic.

“Then who the hell was it?” I questioned, my hands magnetised to her cheek all of a sudden.

Lyra didn’t pull away and neither did I. I lower my head and she raised onto her toes and titled hers back a little. She was graceful, like a dancer. My lips brushed over hers. They were sweet like honey. For the first few moments it was bliss and the realisation hit, like a stone to my stomach. I jerked backwards suddenly, shaking my head.

“I can’t do this,” I said, my fingers trying to wipe her taste off of my lips, “I don’t- this isn’t-“

I was tongue-tied, not able to explain to her how wrong it was. The words wouldn’t work the way I wanted them to.

“Gray?” Lyra murmurs, a tender voice. Her amber eyes are widened and slightly confused.

“No,” I yell. She flinches and another wave of horribly strong emotion rushes over me, drowning me. “No I’m in love with someone else. I don’t know what that was. I can’t-“

I stumbled backward a few steps and the turned around and ran. Like the coward that I am.

“It did just happen,” I murmur, lifting my head from the wall to look my older brother in eye, “I swear to god, I didn’t intend for it to happen, I didn’t even know I had feelings for her.”

I can see he disagrees still and isn’t convinced. I don’t know how to prove it to him.

“Let’s establish one thing here, who do you like?” Xander asks me.

“I like Lyra,” I say slowly, “but I love y/n.”

Nash shakes his head, “if you loved her you wouldn’t have done that.”

“I made a mistake,” I press on.

“And you will pay for it and regret it for the rest of your life,” he shrugs, “it’s not what you wanted to hear but it’s the truth. Listen, I love Libby and loving someone means so many things. One of those things is that I don’t even look at other women, to me they don’t even really exist. Libby is my world and no one else even comes into the equation, so the fact is someone else came into the equation for you, meaning the love wasn’t there.”

“But it was, I felt it,” I say, my voice breaking as I press my chest.

“What do you feel for Lyra?” he asks plainly.

“I don’t know, she’s intriguing and smart and beautiful,” I murmur, “and I like her, but I don’t know if I have romantic feelings for her.”

“Then why did you kiss her?”

“Comfort? Lust? Greed? Selfishness? I don’t know it just happened,” I repeat for what feels like the hundredth time.

“Stop using that phrase as a get out clause,” Nash shakes his head, “you have to admit to yourself more than anyone that this didn’t just happen.”

“I leaned in and I put my lips of hers, and I didn’t stop it, it didn’t feel wrong straight away,” I admit out loud finally.

“It didn’t?” Xander says, looking wounded.

“No, it didn’t feel wrong until I realised what I’d done,” I say, looking down, suddenly finding my shoelaces to be the most interesting thing in the world.

No one replies for a long while. That’s when I realise how exhausted I truly am and how much I crave sleep.

“I vouched for you,” Xander says quietly, “I told her that you’d never do that, that you weren’t that guy.”

“I’m not,” I say, in denial at first. I take a moment to analyse his sentence and then come to a sickening realisation, “oh my god I am…”

“She was already anxious about where your loyalties were Gray,” he winces.

“I proved her right, I proved every worry she had right, I just proved to her that she shouldn’t have trusted me,” I spiral, hating that I hadn’t seen it sooner.

Xander looks to Nash for support for a reply.

“Yeah,” Nash sighs, “you did.”

“I need to fix this, there has to be a way-“

“Grayson,” the acuteness of his voice cuts through my sentence like a machete.

I freeze and clamp my mouth firmly shut.

“This isn’t a broken vase, you can’t glue it back together or buy a new one,” he tells me softly.

He was referring to a time where Jameson and I had been seven and eights years old. We’d been brawling of course, Hawthorne style and accidentally smashed a vase. Usually it wouldn’t matter, there were vases all over Hawthorne House and they were smashed frequently. But this wasn’t just any vase. It was nan’s priceless vase that had belonged to her daughter, our grandmother, Alice. We were never allowed within a five mile radius of it, but like the rebellious children we were, we didn’t listen. Through our fight we’d smashed the whole thing, it was truly destroyed. The two of us stayed up for nights on need gluing together the pieces only to realise it was never going to look like the original again. So we’d hunted to buy another, problem was, this vase was one of a kind. It turned out after four weeks or trying to ship a similar one in that nan had known the whole time. She didn’t speak to either of us for a good few months.

“This is real life, she is a real person and you hurt her,” he explains, “fixing this isn’t an option. There isn’t a way to fix it, there are no pieces to our back together, okay?”

I’m silent but it’s the loudest voice in the room. My face pinches together in agony. For the first time, a little of the disappointment fades and my brother’s face softens. He wraps a strong arm around me and I flop into him like a lifeless bag of nothingness. I bury my head into his shoulder and try to cry but there seems to be no tears left. He understands and holds me for a moment. Suddenly I’m six years old again and crying in Nash’s in my arms over Jameson hiding my favourite teddy bear at the time, then I’m eleven in his arms with pneumonia after being stupid enough to get caught in the rapids un the dead of winter wanting a good photograph of a rare fish, then I’m seventeen, crying over a redheaded girl who I thought I’d managed to murder. And now here I am, at twenty-two years old in his grasp once again, having made the greatest mistake of my life.

Suddenly I feel another set of arms wrap around the both of us.

“Group hug!” a familiar voice sings.

Leave it to Xander to make me crack a half smile in the darkest moments I’ve ever experienced. After a while I pull away and sigh.

“Do you think she’ll ever forgive me?” I ask, pulling away.

“Honestly?” Xander asks.

I nod

“No,” he says. I wish I could see that little glimmer of a lie in his eyes, but I can’t. And it kills me.

“Think about it like this,” he sighs, “would you forgive Eve for what she did?”

“This is not the same thing,” I reply coldly.

“Eve cheated your trust, she betrayed you,” he explains gently, “that’s exactly how she feels.”

Dread fills my every pore as I murmur lifelessly, “I’m as bad as Eve.”

“No wait,” he says, looking guilty and panicked all at the same time, “that’s not what I meant!”

“I know,” I reassure him so some of his guilt subsides, “but it’s true and now I’ve just realised.”

“Look Gray, you aren’t Eve. You’re never going to be Eve, but think of how you felt then. That’s how y/n feels,” Nash soothes, “she’s not going to just forgive you, that’s not how it works.”

“You just broke her heart Gray,” Xander adds, careful to keep his tone as light as a feather, “for a girl you just met.”

“Why am I horrible person? Why do I always find a way to mess to something good?” I groan, smacking my head on the wall behind me. There’s an audible thump as pain spreads through the back of my skull. I wonder if I can concuss myself to forget all of this, but I don’t attempt the idea.

“You don’t-“

“No I do,” I say firmly, cutting him off, “I’m not meant for love, to love or to be loved, I’m not built for it. I’m not a good enough person for it. I’m never going to find my Libby or my Max or my Avery.“

“Grayson-“ Nash begins.

“Emily knew it and now so does y/n,” I snap.

My brothers still at her name, not moving a muscle. I never bring up Emily.

“Listen to me,” Nash says sharply, getting my attention, “you are meant to be loved. You are meant to love. I love you, Xander loves you, Jameson loves you and y/n loved you too…”

The change of tense makes my soul ache.

“…but this time around, you made a mistake, a costly mistake. But that doesn’t mean you don’t deserve love.”

I nod numbly, robotically.

“What can I do to make it up to her?” I ask, my voice beginning to tremble, “to show her I’m sorry? Something there has to be something.”

Nash gives me a grim look and Xander’s face remains blank, they’re the only answers I need. My head sinks into my hands. The door reopens and I look back up. Jameson has returned.

He meets my eyes, “Avery’s with her.”

Blood surges through my heart and I can almost smile. He checked on her. For me.

“Is she okay?” I ask quickly.

Jameson looks at me and for a split second I almost see the ghost concern is his eyes. He shakes his head softly, “no, but she will be,” he replies, it’s an attempt to comfort me and I am grateful.

“Thank you,” I mumble.

“I’m not apologising for what I said, because I still stand by it and you won’t change my mind,” Jameson says, “but I am sorry for being so angry about it.”

“You were right,” I whisper, “you were right about me. I never deserved her, so was nothing but an angel to me and I just turned around and threw it all away. I abused the luxury I had, I stabbed her in the back and then gifted another with the knife, I’m a horrible person.”

“What you did was wrong, but that’s doesn’t make you a horrible person,” he sighs, “you need time Gray, this is going to take a lot of healing. On both sides.”

“I don’t deserve to heal, I deserve to be in pain,” I murmur, the dullness in my tone echos around the empty walls.

“Oh no, we’re not going back to emo Grayson,” Xander says quickly, shaking his head.

“I agree with Xander on this one,” Nash nods, readjusting his cowboy hat.

“I don’t want to hear you blasting my chemical romance at three a.m and then denying it later again, you came out of that phase we’re not going back there,” Jameson tells me.

I bark out a laugh that thaws my icy chest. I then bite the inside of my cheek.

“I can’t fix this, can I?” I say, looking at the ground,

Nash shakes his head softly.

“But that doesn’t mean you can’t be fixed,” Xander says.

“You’ll get through this Gray,” Jamie agrees, “I know it.”

The room grows still.

“Can we drink that whiskey now?” I ask, to cut through the silence. I feel like getting drunk, I feel like I need some relief.

“Big brother,” Xander nods at Nash handing him the bottle.

“Little brother,” he tips his cowboy hat in reply before taking the bottle into his hands and cracking it open.

“Let me pour these things properly,” Nash grins, “Jamie, come help.”

“Wait me too!” Xander jumps up,

“Stay with Gray,” he shakes his head.

“I don’t need to be babysat,” I grumble, annoyance written all over my face.

“I want to watch them pour whiskey properly,” Xander explains, “so I can impress Max.”

My eyebrows fly to my forehead, “Max drinks?”

“No I want to impress her though,” he grins.

‘You’re an odd human,” I almost laugh, tilting my head to the side.

“Why ta very much!” he says, almost skipping away.

Once I know they’re all gone, I lean back on the wall, my heart feeling a tiny bit less heavy. The pain isn’t gone. I think I’ve just gone numb. I feel hollow, empty, nothingness. Guilt is still gnawing at my insides but slower. A satifying clink against the fragile rim of the glass takes me out of my own head for a split second. There are hushed voices from the kitchen, I notice. I walk over to the door that lay ajar, I lean in to listen.

“We need to tell him,” it sounds like Jameson.

“Not now,” the accent indicates Nash.

“Then when?” Xander’s voice asks, “how long can we prolong it.”

“I can hear you,” I tell them, raising my voice a little.

They turn to face me, awkwardly remaining silent. The expressions on their faces don’t offer me comfort.

“Whatever it is, spit it out,” I say, “it’s not like tonight could get any worse.”

They share a look. Apparently it can. I feel sick to my stomach.

I can barely breathe, “who died?”

“No one has died,” Xander says quickly, “yet.”

“What?” I say, my tone deadly,

Nash glares at him, then turns back to me. There’s sorrow laced delicately, deep within his hazel irises.

“Gray,” he says gently, “Gray we hate to do this but…”

“What? What is it?” I ask urgently.

“Gigi’s missing.”

The words shock me to my core. I feel my throat begin the close up as panic returns with a smirk and triumphant greeting. My whole world has collapsed in less than 24 hours.

***

YOUR POV

I don’t hate him. Call me naive or call me stupid. But I don’t. I don’t think I ever could. The kind of love I have for him is unconditional, irrevocable. Time can’t heal a wound this deep and although it is still fresh now, I can tell. But if he were to say sorry I think I would forgive him every time. And if he asked me back I’d fall into his arms into an instant. And I hate myself for it, it’s stupid and it’s a little cruel. How easily I would take him back after what he did. I know I shouldn’t but something inside of me is drawn to him. Like an invisible magnet has been planted in our hearts. I wish I didn’t love so hard, fall so deeply, maybe I wouldn’t get hurt so badly. But it’s in my nature, it’s who I am. I wonder if he knows how much pain I’m in, the rippling agony that rolls across my chest relentlessly with no hint as to when it will cease. I’m tired of being the second choice but unfortunately I wouldn’t mind being his. And I know it’s completely stupid of me to think that way, completely wrong but love makes you do stupid things so they say. I sit on the beach, by the sea in a state of numbness. Silent tears roll down my tears as the waves lap my feet. Deja vu washes over me and the memories of Grayson and I the night of the game flash through my mind.

I grip his hand and run with him as he guides me the just beyond the shore. He sits down swiftly on the sand and pulls me down to sit between his legs. I lean my back onto his chest and let him nuzzle his face into my collarbone.

“I love you,” he whispers, kissing my neck, “only you.”

Only me, huh? Only me…

The waves crash against the rocks, hurtling a salty spray towards me. I hear footsteps and turn around. Avery stands there, a mournful expression over her delicate face. She knows. I stumble towards her and collapse into her arms in a fit of uncontrollable sobs now and she holds me. Her touch is gentle and warm but it’s nothing compared to his. I realise he might never hold me in his arms again and I cry even harder.

***

I don’t hold Lyra accountable. She is not to blame. Some girls in my position might dream about different ways to brutally murder her but I can only ask what comfort would it bring me? My feelings are already dead, what good is more pain doing?

There was a choice that Grayson Hawthorne was given: his dancer or his angel. He chose his dancer and I hope he’s happy. Because angels have wings and we rise up stronger.

idk guys I think I wrote Grayson’s POV really awfully to be honest… also I feel like the 911 meet up was not like their normal ones where they try and like do something (e.g drink or dare) and then talk about the pain but that’s bc Grayson was in such a mess and then they had to drop the bomb that Gigi was missing. so anywayyyss…

I am sorry this took so long and I hope it lived up to any expectation you wanted it too (sorry if it didn’t) and I hope you enjoyed 🤍🤍 thanks for reading as always

TIG masterlist

[whousestypewriters]

moments with you - g.h x reader

pairing: grayson hawthorne x fem!reader

warnings: none! (my 12am writing skills)

a/n: heheh enjoy some gray fluff my lovelies <33 (another grayson fics coming tomorrow hehe)

taglist: @nqds, @lxvebelle, @reminiscentreader, @ecliphttlunar, @ravenclawdirectioner,

@tornqdowarnings, @catapparently, @zenikswaffleshop, @off-to-th-r4aces, @emila07, [if your url is white it means i couldn't tag you]

sunlight seeped through the curtains of your room - well technically it isn't your room, but you did just wake up in it, feeling safe and cozy. courtesy of the warm body pressed against yours. the peace of the room broken by a loud alarm that you're quick to hit snooze on.

the warm body that usually is already up and into the day by now. his blond hair resting atop his pillow and his arm wrapped firmly around your waist. its rare that you wake up and grayson is still in bed with you, let alone still asleep. you've both missed each other this past week not spending much time together, aside from when grayson slipped into bed late and you left early for work.

so seizing this moment you snuggle deeper into his hold feeling his grip tighten ever so slightly. you know you have a job to get to in and hour but you couldn't be bothered to ruin this moment. who cares if a bunch of entitled adults miss out on coffee for the first time in their life?

just as you close your eyes again you hear the loud blaring of your alarm set off. come on. your eyes open and you twist around trying to find your phone to throw it across the room. which in retrospect doesn't sound like the best idea but its the one you went with - the loud crash waking grayson up unbeknownst to you.

sighing you move to stand up knowing you should start to get ready for work but a tug on your waist is all it takes to have you sprawling back into the arms of a now awake grayson hawthorne.

"oh hello you," you giggle.

"stay," he mumbles.

"i have work in an hour gray," you inform him.

"i don't care, stay."

"i'll get fired," you laugh - ignoring the fact that about ten minutes earlier you were fully prepared to stay.

"i'll buy the damn cafe for you, just stay a while with me," gray's soft voice says as he presses a kiss to your forehead.

sighing you relent, "good morning gray."

"good morning sweetheart."

you both lie there for a moment just enjoying the peacefulness of the sunlight room, holding one another.

"these are my favorite moments of the week," grayson whispers.

"what, having me fired?" you joke.

"no, this right now, us. moments with you just lying here together are my favorite." you melt slightly at his sleepy timbre.

"me too," you sigh. "i'll tell you what, clear your schedule for tomorrow, you and i are having a date day."

that brings a smile to grayson's face - and grayson is devastatingly handsome normally, he's heart stoppingly beautiful when he smiles. joy washing over his features, almost childlike. you love that you bring it out in him, the only one who brings it out in him.

"sounds perfect," he says pressing an achingly tender kiss to your forehead. "can't wait sweetheart."

[wish-i-were-heather]

A FOOL FOR YOU PT 4⤵ GRAYSON HAWTHORNE X READER

ABOUT: 2642 words, no use of y/n (part 1, part 2, part 3, part 5)

STORY: well, y'know. you can't ignore a 911 text from a hawthorne

WARNINGS: none really, reader does struggle to swim tho and freaks out a little

TAGS: @littlemissmentallyunstable @gretag13 @lanterns-and-daydreams @whatsamongus @alwaysthefangirl @zuzanna-jadw1ga @emelia07 @f4iry-bell @low-caloriesmonsterultra @that-daughter-of-hephaestus @jimcarreyfann42 @ravishinglyliving @maybxlle - lmk if you wanna be added to the taglist!

A/N: EEK I LOVED WRITING THIS. i didn't describe the reader's swimsuit because i don't know what everyone is comfortable with so i let you kinda imagine it however u want! i'm not sure how many more parts i can get out of this idea, there'll definitely be at least one more lmk what u think tho

He said please. 

Grayson didn’t lack manners. It’s not that he didn’t know how to say please and thank you. But he also wasn’t the kind of person to throw around a plea lightly. Grayson Hawthorne was, well, a Hawthorne. The name itself was a demand, not requiring a please. But he’d felt the need to say please to you. 

Maybe you were overthinking it. 

Or maybe you were still in denial, like Avery said you were. 

The texts came in at eight at night, too, which only raised more questions in your mind. If he wanted to talk to you, why hadn’t he just found you? Or simply texted you to meet somewhere? You didn’t understand why he’d felt the need to use the 911; you would’ve come if he’d just told you to go to the pool. 

Hawthornes did tend to have a flare for dramatics, you supposed. 

You had no idea why Grayson wanted you to meet him at the pool. He was a swimmer, sure, but that was very much his personal time. Grayson didn’t often appreciate people watching or joining him in the pool. But, you figured there was a chance he expected you to.

So you found yourself at her door again. Despite the faint conversation you could hear from inside, you knocked. 

Avery took longer than last time to open the door. “What’s up?” She asked. 

“Hey. Uh, do you have a swimsuit I could borrow?”

She frowned slightly, confused. “I mean I do, yeah, but why-”

You didn’t even have to say anything. You just showed her your phone screen with the text messages. Her eyes widened as she read them and she immediately opened the door wider for you. “Get the hell in here.”

Avery was already digging through the grand dresser. As you entered the room behind her, you noticed Jameson sitting on the floor in front of a deck of cards, giving you a curious look. “What-”

“Not now, Jamie,” Avery quickly answered. “Girl problem.”

That shut him up. 

“Don’t mind him,” she told you, turning back around with a few items in hand. “We were just playing solitaire.”

You raised an eyebrow. “Together? Isn’t that a one player game?”

“His idea, not mine. Managed to turn it into a competition too, somehow,” Avery shrugged. Jameson gasped dramatically but she continued before he could speak, bringing your attention back to why you asked for help. “So, I’ve actually never worn this one before, you could keep it if you want. Or-”

“That one’s fine,” you interrupted, taking it from her. “Can I change in your bathroom?” “Oh, uh, yeah, sure I guess,” Avery answered, clearly confused as to why you were so quick to answer. “Sorry, I’m just trying to get there as soon as I can. Thanks.”

You didn’t change completely, just putting it on and putting your clothes back on over it. You didn’t plan on getting into the water, but it was worth being prepared.

As you were stepping out of the room and thanking Avery, Jameson called, “Say hi to Gray for me.”

Your head snapped back. “What?”

“Come on,” he smirked. “He’s practically the only person who uses the pool, especially at this time. So tell him I said hi.”

Shaking your head, you just ignored him. Jameson was the type of person who could read people well, so odds are he probably already knew he was right. But you didn’t want to give even more of a reaction to him than you already had. 

Avery grabbed your arm though, before you left. “Hey, hey, good luck.”

You thanked her and left, just hoping Jameson wouldn’t try to watch from the window. 

~~

The cool night air hit you sharply as you stepped outside. It hadn’t been too chilly during the day, but you now found yourself wishing you were in more than just shorts and a thin hoodie.

Shivering, you made your way over to the pool. Your mind was racing the whole way there, but there wasn’t really anything else for you to be wondering. Grayson had asked for you to come to the pool, presumably either to swim with him or just because he was most comfortable there. Either way, it was pretty clear that he wanted to discuss what happened when he was drunk. But you still didn’t understand why he sent the 911. 

Good thing you were on your way to finding out. 

The pool deck was empty, save for a few lounge chairs. The fancy cushioned kind, the ones you would only find at a hotel. And the Hawthorne mansion, of course. 

On one of the chairs were two neatly folded towels- two. So he did expect you to get in the water with him? Where was he anyway? If he’d already brought out towels, why wasn’t he-

Splash.

You’d been too caught up in your thoughts and the sound of your heart racing in your chest to realize that Grayson was, in fact, already in the pool. Swimming laps because he was Grayson Hawthorne, so of course he was swimming laps when the sun had already set and the only light in the sky was that of the stars. 

Swimming had never really been your thing, so you didn’t know the exact stroke, but you would’ve been a liar if you said you weren't somewhat mesmerized. The way his arms went up and out, the way his fingers glided along the surface before entering the water once again. His legs kicked together, the movement fast and almost indiscernible under the blue of surrounding him. 

Grayson came up for air so quickly you couldn’t even make out his face, but your eyes caught on the way his hair flicked up with his head. It was certainly a skill, and he managed it so gracefully. You struggled to look away.

Thankfully, you were pulled out of your stare when he suddenly reached the wall nearest to you. Grayson’s hands touched the edge of the pool in perfect sync. You could see the red in his face, the tire he was giving himself from swimming. You wondered how long he’d been there before you found him.

Grayson met your eyes with a tired smile as he caught his breath. “You came.”

“You said 911,” you explained, sitting on the edge of the chair where he’d set the towels. “I figured it was pretty important.” 

“Yes, I did.” He nodded. “We do only get one of those a year, so I’d appreciate it if you didn’t mention that to any of my brothers.”

“Got it.”

He was avoiding the elephant in the room. 

“Would you like to join me?”

You stared at him. “Excuse me?” 

“You’re excused,” he said. “Would you like to join me?”

Was he really just going to ignore the fact that he’d sent you such an urgent message? A 911 could’ve meant he was dying, for all you knew when you’d first received it. And what, it was because he wanted to go for a swim with you? There was more he wasn’t saying and you just wanted to yell at him to spit it out. 

Instead, you responded calmly. 

“Join you in the pool?”

Grayson looked you up and down and shook his head. “I suppose you can’t really, not without proper swimwear.”

You got in the pool in a suit when you were drunk, you didn’t say. 

“I have a bathing suit on under this,” you explained. “I just… why do I need to get in the water? Can’t you just tell me what’s going on?”

He took a deep breath. 

“I’ve decided I owe you an apology. For what happened.” You knew immediately what he was referring to. “I was reckless and foolish and unintentionally put the burden of myself onto you. It would have been easier for you to just leave me be, but you dealt with my mess. I appreciate that.” 

The silence that followed was only interrupted by the gentle lapping of the pool.

“See why I figured you should get in?” He asked. “We’d be at an even level. Better suited for such a conversation.”

“Or you could just get out,” you offered. 

“Please?” 

That word again.

Grayson Hawthorne knew what he was doing. 

“Fine,” you groaned, but really only half annoyed. You turned around as you began to take off the layers above the swimsuit, watching him in the corner of your eye as he looked away respectfully.

The cold hit you even harder now that you had removed your hoodie, and you hoped that the pool was well heated. 

“Okay, okay.” You began walking over to the edge of the pool where Grayson was. When his eyes found you, he stared for a little longer than normal before answering.

“You’re nervous,” he observed. “Can you swim?”

You shrugged, taking another step closer. “I know how to stop myself from drowning.��

Grayson moved out of your way and you sat on the edge of the pool with your feet getting wet. It was heated, thankfully. Comfortably so. No wonder he loved to come here at night. 

He was watching you silently. You couldn’t tell what he was thinking, and it was killing you. Not that anyone could ever tell what Grayson Hawthorne hid behind those piercing eyes, but yet another question amidst everything that had happened that week was too much.

Of course he’s a mystery, he’s a Hawthorne. 

Before you could overthink it even further, you got in.

The warmth of the water enveloped you, contrasting greatly with the chill of the night air. You were holding onto the wall, not planning on letting go because your swimming skills were just barely above that of a child starting swim lessons. But Grayson’s intense gaze kept your heart racing. 

He swam towards you, grabbing onto the wall a little closer but still leaving a respectful distance between you. “Do you know why I sent the 911?”

“No,” you admitted. “It scared me.”

“I apologize for that. I panicked.”

You hadn’t expected that confession from him.

“You panicked?”

He nodded slowly. “I was afraid you’d think less of me after how I acted. You haven’t spoken to me in days, so I wasn’t sure you’d come otherwise.” The vulnerability in his voice was tangible.

“It’s not that I’ve been trying to avoid you, Grayson,” you explained. “I just… I mean, you haven’t spoken to me either.”

“I thanked you, I thought we were past what happened. I didn’t think we needed to talk about it.”

“You thanked me and then flirted and walked away.”

Grayson raised an eyebrow. “Did I?”

“You know very well what you did,” you said, trying to hide the blush on your face. 

He swam a little closer. His voice dropped to the same sincere tone it had adopted back when he was drunk. When you’d told him to be careful and he’d cupped your face. When he said he’d never hurt you, never. 

“Perhaps I do. But that doesn’t change the fact that I burdened you with my drunk self.”

“You’re not a burden, Grayson,” you told him, also pushing yourself closer to him along the wall. “It was no problem, really. Just a little entertaining.”

He chuckled, and you couldn’t tell if it was genuine or bitter. 

The way he was looking at you was making you feel something. Something you couldn’t name but… didn’t quite hate. You started to move yourself a little closer to him until-

Splash.

Your hand slipped off the edge of the pool, accidentally sending you back. Not exceptionally far or deep into the pool, but enough to make you panic. You could keep yourself afloat, sure, but not when you were suddenly pushed away from the only solid thing keeping your head above water.

But before you could fully let the panic set in, a strong arm wrapped around your waist and pulled you upwards.

The sensation of being lifted was disorienting. You were overwhelmed by the sudden rush of water and movement, then the lack of water as your head reached the surface again. Even if you’d barely been below the water for a few seconds, you found yourself gasping for air. 

Grayson’s arm around you was the only steady thing in the chaos.

“Hey, hey” Grayson spoke, and it took a moment for your startled mind to process the words. “You’re okay, I’ve got you.”

You blinked rapidly, trying to focus. It took a moment for your breathing to calm down, but you helped yourself by rationalizing it; you’d been under the water for maybe five seconds, there was no need to panic so much.

The shock had just gotten you.

His voice broke through again, focusing your vision and hearing on him. “Just breathe, in and out. Nice and slow, just like that.”

You followed his instructions, taking deep breaths. Your panic began to fade, and you became painfully aware of how close he now was to you, the proximity at which he held you.

Grayson didn’t let go as you calmed down, simply keeping you tucked protectively in his arm as if the water was threatening you. He used his free hand to reach up and brush a wet strand of hair from your face behind your ear. The gesture was so gentle, so careful, that you felt your heart flutter.

“Are you alright?” He asked. 

You nodded. “Yeah, yeah, I think so. Thank you.”

He only nodded in return, his usually sharp gray eyes beginning to soften as he stared down at you. He didn’t move his hand away after moving the hair out of your face. It stayed there, lingering around your ear, until he decided to move down, cupping your face.

Surprisingly, it wasn’t the first time that shirtless Grayson Hawthorne was holding your face in his large hands and looking at you in a way that was more than an annoyed glance. 

But it felt different this time. More intense, more real. 

He wasn’t drunk, not hungover; there was no doubt in your mind that he really meant everything. His eyes were still locked on yours with an emotion that you couldn’t quite place, yet somehow felt deep within your core. 

He leaned forward, so close to you that your foreheads were almost touching. His eyes fluttered shut and you realized what was happening only after you felt the words he whispered against your lips-

“I’m sorry.”

Grayson closed the small gap between you, gently pressing his lips to yours. The kiss was soft, almost hesitant at first, like he was giving you the chance to pull away or tell  him to stop. But when you didn’t, when you leaned into the kiss, the arm around you tightened.

Your hands moved on their own, both sliding their way up to rest on his chest. He responded to your touch with a low hum that made you shiver despite the heated pool. 

His arm moved up to the back of your head, pushing you impossibly closer to him. The kiss grew more urgent, more desperate, like he was trying to express every emotion he’d been hiding for the past week. It was overwhelming, and for a moment nothing existed outside of you and Grayson Davenport Hawthorne.

When he pulled back, you kept your eyes closed. Grayson placed a small kiss on your forehead before resting it against his own. You were so close now, much closer than before, but that didn’t matter anymore.

“I’ve wanted to do that for a while now,” he admitted softly.

“Me too, Grayson,” you grinned. “Me too.”

When he kissed you again, he tasted like those stupid cherries he loved and felt like the end of the world.

the writing above belongs to me. please do not copy, modify, repost on other sites or claim as your own. © 2024 wish-i-were-heather

[darkacdemiasworld]

i would say goodnight but i’m not cuddling with grayson hawthorn, my head on his chest, reading a cute little book as he falls asleep with a subtle grip on my waist. so night everyone

[wildesqdreams]

you and i

pairing - grayson hawthorne x fem!reader.

summary - grayson hawthorne has a hard time living for just himself. but the love that he shares with y/n will always make him feel at ease.

warnings - this is set before the first book, so none, only kissing and romance.

navigation | masterlist | request | taglist

a/n: this has been stuck in my drafts for a long time, and i finally finished it :) now, i will be getting to your requests.

the bed slightly dipped, as the boy climbed in besides her. he was trying to be very quiet since it was already night, and everything was peaceful.

but he failed, when he felt y/n stir and turn around, facing him, "where were you?" her voice was a little raspy, and grayson couldn't help but smile at her tired state.

the girl had stayed up, waiting for her boyfriend, but soon sleep took over her and she went to bed. her arm wrapped around his waist as she snuggled closer to him, missing his warmth.

"just had to do some papers," his hand went to her waist, pulling her closer to his chest.

"you should take a break."

"hm."

"you know i'm right."

silence.

grayson hawthorne played an important role in his family. he wasn't the eldest nor the youngest, but almost everything stood on his shoulders. he was raised differently than his brothers. one day, he was going to inherit the heir, so it was important for grayson to do everything right. not make a single mistake.

but how can a person be happy if he can't let himself slip? if he can't let himself breathe and let go.

that's why y/n didn't let him get lost in the hawthorne life. even though grayson has a strong character, the girl isn't afraid to speak her mind. that's what pulled the boy towards her. the wise heart. the honesty. and of course the love that she gave to others.

"just because others have made unrealistic expectations about you doesn't mean you should follow them. you are your own person, grayson. sometimes it's okay to take a break, even if some may get mad."

and just like that, grayson fell in love with her even more.

"you know," his hand went to her cheek, "sometimes i wonder how lucky i got with you," he stroked her skin, his touch making goosebumps appear on her arms.

"i think you should stop with that cheesy crap," the girl smiled and rolled on her back.

not even a second later his hand went to her hip and she felt light kisses be planted on her neck, "i can't help it if i have a beautiful girl with me," his lips moved along her jaw, stopping upbove hers, "but you are so much more then beautiful to me, y/n."

"i'm serious about what i said grayson," she looked into his eyes, her hand went to the back of his neck, "i love you and i don't want you to over stress yourself. i just want to help."

"believe me, you're helping me a lot, love," with that, his lips connected with hers, into a passionate kiss. and in this moment, grayson hawthorne was reminded again that no amount of money was as important as the girl beneath him.

with the love that they felt for each other, the couple would get through anything. just as long as they were together.

taglist: @noaboacoa @mochamvgz

[never-enough-novels]

Sometimes I like to imagine how it would be like to wake up next to grayson hawthorne

His hair tousled, flying around here and there, not how neat and tidy and perfect it is all the time. It suits him like him, making him look a bit more free and young. His face relaxed from the weight on his shoulders from handling everything and more, even if he doesn't have to. His hand loosely wrapped around my waist as if he doesn't want me to leave, even in his sleep. His breathing slow and steady and a soothing lullaby for me. Light breaths occasionally breaking the silence making me smile at his innocence and how adorable he can be at times.

Wrote this while waking up at 5 to get ready for my class at 6😃😃 I wanna sleep so bad😭

Pls forgive me for this shit writing it's been a while since I wrote and i absolutely hate this🙏🙏

[emelia07]

I just KNOW jameson hawthorne understands hand placement

[f4iry-bell]

CHANGE MY MIND

pairing: grayson hawthorne x reader

summary: grayson pushed reader away sm that he lost her.

tagging: @unnoodles @never-enough-novels @alwaysthefangirl @clarissaweasley-10 @benny1989fredd @imaseabear @elysianwayy77 @whatsamongus @sheisntyou @emelia07

warning: angst

a/n: inspired by @daystarpoet 's cai 🤭pls do check it out, it's amazing.

masterlist

He does it again, he has been pushing her away for the past week, not telling how he really feels. Whenever she asks him, it's always “I'm fine” , the obvious lie. It was so frustrating for both of them as Grayson just won't tell her what is up, and she can't just watch him go through something alone, without understanding.

Grayson was currently driving her to this event they're supposed to go to, something that's hosted by the heiress for charity. The problem is the drive was filled with Graysons lonely suffering, he wanted to be alone at the moment, especially with her constantly asking what's wrong. He was a patient person but he needed her to stop it, without thinking he snapped.

“Will you ever stop? I said I'm fine.” He gripped the steering wheel.

“I'm just trying to under—”

“No, you're trying to be annoying.” The words stung her heart. She didn't expect him to ever use such a word on her.

She looked at him with slightly teary eyes but she didn't want him to see her, so she turned her face towards the window, and kept quiet the entire ride.

Grayson, realising what he has done, gently put his hands on her knees to show her he didn't mean it, but she barely acknowledged his touch or him. She completely ignored him. It hurts Grayson that she ignored him, but he knew he deserved it. After all, he led her to this.

After the teacher held the event, she didn't wait for Grayson to open her door, she immediately got out and started walking to the event. Grayson, given his speed, caught up to her quickly. Once they were in he put his hands on the small of her back as he led her through the crowd, they met some new people, he introduced her to them as his girlfriend as if nothing is going on between them right. She slipped away from him for a while, while he was thinking about the situation, and his habit of isolation, distancing himself. She came back to where she left him, and spoke.

“Avery invited me to stay over at her place. You can leave if you wish to, I'll be going riding with her and Jameson.” She said, her face was flushed a bit.

“Oh.” He wasn't processing what she said at first. “You don't have to leave with them.” He gathered himself.

“I should.”

“No, you're doing this on purpose.”

“So?”

He hated how calm her tone sounded, but he knew her body language said otherwise.

“So you're being childish. We have an argument, and you don't want to face the aftermath.” He pointed.

“No, Grayson I don't. And it's rich coming from you because you don't face anything! You don't face me when you're feeling like—I have no clue what— and I have to sit here, and watch you go through it alone!” She snapped.

The words hit him, he knew it was true, and he hated it. When she noticed the lack of reply she shook her head, and walked away but Grayson caught her arm, gentle yet firm.

“Don't walk away from me.”

“Why? I thought I was annoying.”

“Don't— you're being difficult.”

“No, it's easy. You push me away, and now I'm going away. It's as simple as that.”

“No, you're being stubborn.”

“And you're not?” She scoffed.

“I'm sick of this, always arguing with you, always asking for answers that I can't give you. I'm sick of it.”

“Then let me go.”

He loosened his grip on her hand.

“No, Grayson, I meant let me go. Out of your life.” Her shoulders relaxed when she finished her sentence. Grayson's stiffened.

“I…You don't mean that.”

“I do. You either let me in or let me go.”

Grayson looked down, and shook his head. “You can't put me in this position.”

“No. I'm not, if you can't be vulnerable, if you still feel not comfortable enough to be vulnerable with me after six months of dating, then I don't think I'm the right person for you, Grayson.” It hurted her to say the last part. She really thought they were going to last forever when they started dating.

He was awfully quiet, he was deciding what to say. He knew what his problem was, but he just couldn't tell her. This is the right thing.

“Maybe you're right.” She knew what she said but hearing it from him was worse.

She nodded her head. “I'll take a cab home, and move out tomorrow.”

Grayson helped her with the cab. He wanted to be close to her at the last moment, because he was never going to get her back. After everything he did, and said she'll never take him back.

[cherrys-writings]

Dating grayson and him getting jealous?:)thank youu!!

Your Favorite Kisses

+18 Explicit sexual content, biting, marking, jealous Grayson

It’s not like you could have guessed this was the missing piece to your relationship. Probably a dream relationship, two friends accidentally falling for each other. You and Grayson becoming an Us. Nothing felt more right, you had him now and you couldn’t get enough, finally able to touch every inch of him. You tangle your fingers in his light hair, losing yourselves in each other. Grayson’s toned body trapping you against the wall, wandering hands teetering the line between confidence and hesitation. Your legs wrapped around his waist. Never failing to pull a gasp from you when he easily hauls you off your feet. You get to watch Grayson let go of his control. His perfect, deliberate kisses turning rushed and clumsy. The grazes of his teeth turning to full bites. 

The little “innocent” kisses. Something about when he kisses your hand makes you blush harder than anything. In public, Grayson will rarely do more than kiss your hands or cheeks, but he doesn’t keep his hands to himself. Always needing physical contact: an arm around your waist, a gentle hand on the small of your back, hand resting on your knee, or his fingers laced with yours. 

Affectionately dubbed the “princely brother,” Grayson once responded to a question about your relationship with, “she’s my queen.”

Then there are the less frenzied kisses. When you’re straddling his lap or laying on top of him. Grayson is content to hold you against him and explore your mouth with his tongue. His hands cradling your face, gently biting your lip, groaning into your mouth when you inevitably roll your hips against his. Until his large hands lock you in place, shushing your whine with an “I know sweetheart,” murmured against your skin. Always waiting for you to settle before starting again. Slowly getting you riled up with his hands lazily wandering, until you’re practically begging him to fuck you. Even then, he takes his time, worshiping every inch of your body. Kissing every area of exposed flesh, sucking and biting until you’re marked to his liking. Each one in a place for his eyes alone. 

You wouldn’t dare let anyone know that your favorite kisses come when Grayson is jealous. When someone has been staring too long, gotten a little too touchy,or flirted a bit too hard. Grayson has only so much self-control and it takes all of it to civilly get you away from whoever thinks they can touch what belongs to him and get you out of there. He doesn’t let you get a word out before crashing his mouth to yours, claiming the sounds you make as he pins you against the nearest wall, counter, whatever and pushing his thigh between your legs. 

Biting the sensitive part of your neck and growling, “almost bent you over and fucked you right there. Show him exactly who you belong to.”

Grayson’s hand covering your mouth as he plunges his fingers into your soaked entrance. “So wet already. Bet you wanted him to see me fuck you, huh?”

Your barely muffled moans are answer enough, his fingers curling just right. Grayson is just as relentless with his fingers as he is with his cock, bringing you to the edge, but not letting you fall into bliss, not yet. He wants to hear you beg for it. Beg for him to let you come. He doesn’t care who hears you, they’ll all know how good he makes you feel. The things you let him do to you. Not that pompous ass that had the audacity to touch what’s his. 

Grayson has you bent over a counter, hand tangled in your hair, forcing you to look at yourself in the mirror as he takes what he needs. You’re thankful for the waterproof mascara when tears pool in your eyes because it's too much but just so good. His face pressed against your neck, muttering obscene words as he leaves deep purple bruises you know you won’t be able to hide. 

“Everyone will know who you belong to now. Fuck. Gonna have my cum running down your thighs the rest of the evening.”

Grayson stifles his groans against your neck, “who do you belong to?”

“I’m yours.” you pant

“Tell them who you belong to,” he growls

“I’M YOURS”

Your legs nearly give out when you come, shuddering in his arms. His hips jerk then still when he finally comes, panting against your shoulder. He helps you fix your hair as best you can before finding a back way to sneak you out of whatever event you’re at. Grayson makes sure to go back and find that bastard. Keeping eye contact as he wipes your smeared lipstick from his mouth with a handkerchief.

[jahayla-parker]

Jameson Hawthorne Navigation

NAVIGATION TOOLS :

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Rebellious Rivals : Jameson Hawthorne x Reader ~

Descr: 3.2k wc, Jameson is determined to help his longtime 'rival' learn how to let go and relax, will he get his way? Flirty, enemies to lovers, rivals to lovers, unspoken crushes), fluff.

Warnings: flirty Jameson, suggestive content, implications of smut but NO actual smut, light drinking, bets, I think that's all

Coming Soon

Flashing Lights : Jameson Hawthorne x Singer!Reader ~

Descr: Jameson and his singer!girlfriend take on Instagram. SMAU

Warnings: references to/implied sexual content but nothing actually shown or written, banter, flirting

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[inmyheaddd]

just feeling my way back to you - grayson hawthorne x reader

a/n: this was supposed to be a flashback in a grayson series i’m working on but idk if im ever gonna post it 💔 summary: having what was supposed to be a relaxing picnic by the river, took a very unexpected turn when it started raining. heavily. warnings: rain kiss rain kiss rain kiss!! nothing really tho wc: 1.6k masterlist

you and grayson sat by a creek-river hybrid, the sun painting a golden hue over everything as the water beneath you seemed to glitter. 

there wasn’t much noise, apart from the rustling of leaves, the sound of the water, and of course, you and grayson’s non stop quiet chatter and laughter.

the air sent a breeze down your spine, but it did nothing to bother you. you don’t think anything could ever ruin this moment with you and grayson, with your head on his shoulder as you brought your knees to your chest.

well, one thing nearly came close. 

you felt a drop of water on your nose, making you sit up fully as you let out a small gasp. 

“oh my god, is it raining?” you reached your hand to wipe the droplet off your nose, only for more to start dropping on your face, faster, too.

you didn’t see the way grayson’s face turned into a slight frown when you lifted your head off his shoulder, you were too preoccupied with looking at the clouds as more rain started falling down, almost in awe.

grayson then found himself smiling as he watched you look up to the sky and laugh, a sound he’d replay over and over on a record player in his mind. 

his gaze stayed on your face as you tilted your head back down and looked at him, a grin spreading across your face. 

“i have an idea,” you said in a sing-song voice. 

“no.” he deadpanned. 

“i didn’t even tell you!” 

grayson raised his eyebrows at you, a hint of laughter in his voice. “your ideas in situations like these are never good.” 

your jaw fell open in mock offense. “never good? well that’s just a lie.”

his lips threatened to turn up. you would’ve barely noticed if it was anyone else, but you noticed everything about grayson. 

“i apologize, never sensible.” he corrected himself.

it was already raining harder now, but you paid it no mind. looking into grayson’s eyes felt the same as looking up at the stormy skies. 

“and when was the last time you had fun doing something sensible?” you retorted, and now grayson’s barely there smile fully cracked. 

it made way for a chuckle as he looked away from you, a light shake of his head before he ran a hand through his hair. 

you knew you’d gotten him with that one, muttering a small, “exactly.” as you turned yourself around, looking through the bag you’d brought with you. 

after flicking through extra clothes, snacks, your phones, and a speaker, you found the item you were looking for. 

“hey, grayson, this is waterproof, right?” you called out to him as you pulled his camera out of its cover. 

obviously grayson hawthorne’s far-too-expensive camera was waterproof, who were you kidding?

he hummed lowly, more in confusion as to answering your question. 

leaning forward with your legs crossed, you you set up the camera against a tree stump beside you, pressing the record button as grayson watched you — still slightly befuddled.

“hey guys, it’s raining!” you spoke into the camera, adjusting it so you and grayson were in frame with the scene behind you.

“—i’m with grayson hawthorne right now, on a sunday, 6:32 pm, and it’s raining!” you reiterated yourself with a laugh, setting the frame for whatever version of yourself would be looking back at this video in the future. you with grayson, you’d silently hoped.

as you talked, grayson looked at you like you were so much more than you actually were, with so much love in his eyes. it stilled you for a moment as you saw it in the camera. 

your attention was no longer on the camera as you sat upright again, looking at grayson with an ever present smile on your face. 

“what?” you laughed quietly.

in all of his hawthorne manner, he answered your question with one of his own. “what are you doing?” he said, his voice low, almost drowned out with the patter of the rain and sounds around you. 

and in all of your “i love annoying grayson” manner, you didn’t answer his question. you simply grabbed the camera and stood up, and his gaze followed you the whole time.

you jogged towards the river, the rain soaking through your clothes as you went, and set the camera up again on a large rock. grayson’s eyes widened slightly as he watched you.

"what are you doing?" he projected his voice over the rain, punctuating each word as he grew concerned. 

you shot him a quick look over your shoulder, your smile growing even wider. "making real memories!” you exclaimed.

before he could protest, you made sure everything was in frame on the camera, then took a few steps back, your bare feet sliding a little on the wet grass.

"you’re not serious," grayson stated as he followed after you, but there was a tiny hint of humour in his tone now.

"oh, i’m so serious!" you shouted back, already running toward the water.

"sweetheart, wait—" grayson reached out as if to stop you, but it was too late.

you launched yourself off the bank and into the river with a squeal, the cold water hitting you like a shock to the system. it wasn’t that deep— coming up to just below your chest. 

grayson stood frozen for a second, shaking his head as he watched you pop up, gasping and laughing, water streaming down your face as you smoothed your hair back.

"come in!" you called, laughing breathlessly, lifting your arms to show him how much fun you were having. "you know you want to!" you added, giggling to no end.

he hesitated, eyes flicking to the camera that was still recording. "i have absolutely no desire to go in. i truly worry for your sanity sometimes.” 

"my sanity may be questionable, but at least i’m having fun!" you countered, the water swirling around your legs as the rain kept falling. "this is all on camera, gray. if you don’t come in, you’ll be known forever as the grumpy blonde who stood on the sidelines, while i had the time of my life." 

grayson davenport hawthorne would forever be known as a lot of things— and you knew you were going to keep this video as a keepsake for just you two. precious, untarnished with the effects from anyone else. just yours.

maybe not everyone would know the real him— which in fact wasn’t the grumpy blonde like you had joked — but you did. and you were endlessly thankful for that.

grayson let out a deep, exasperated sigh, running a hand through his wet hair before speaking. “you’re going to be the death of me, sweetheart.” 

"so are you getting in or not?" you teased, splashing water in his direction.

grayson looked at you for a second longer, hesitant, before pulling his shirt over his head, revealing his toned chest that had you grinning. 

this was always how it went with you two, but you liked — no, you loved it.

it was second nature for you two; you doing something he found reckless, and him following after you anyway. you completed eachother. 

he kicked off his shoes, then without another word, ran towards the water and landed with a massive splash.

you let out a huge squeal, shielding yourself from the wave and laughing uncontrollably as grayson surfaced, shaking the water from his hair.

you threw your head back laughing as grayson approached you. “i can’t believe you got in!” 

he let out a chuckle as he ran a hand through his hair, “you could get me to do just about anything on this planet.” he said softly, his hands finding your waist as the rain continued to pour around you.

you felt your heart skip a beat, but you didn’t let it show. you smiled up at him, the sound of the rain pattering against the water filling your senses. “just about?” you teased.

“anything.” he corrected himself, pulling you even closer against the water. 

"oh, that’s a dangerous amount of power to give someone, isn’t it?” you joked, putting your arms around grayson’s neck. “especially for a hawthorne like you." 

"oh, undoubtedly.” he teased you right back with a barely there smile, as one of his hands trailed up to caress your face. 

“even more so when it’s you." his voice was all low and smooth, it nearly turned you into putty in his arms.

"you’re lucky i don’t plan on abusing it," you said quietly, trying to keep things light, but you felt your heart hammering against your chest as his face drew nearer to yours. this would never get old.

he let out a breathy chuckle, shaking his head. "you already have, sweetheart." 

he said those words before finally pressing his lips to yours, and the kiss was perfect. it was everything and more that you could’ve ever hoped for, it was the rain kiss of your dreams. 

and just when you thought it couldn’t get any better, grayson’s hands travelled down to your thighs, signaling for you to wrap your legs around his torso. 

and that you did. 

you fought breaking into a smile as your hands weaved through his wet hair, and as you felt his hands on your body. 

it was nothing you hadn’t felt before, but it still gave you fireworks every damn time. 

—

as you pulled back back, both breathless and panting against eachother, you asked him a question. 

“you think that cameras still recording?” you murmured into the tiny space between you. 

“it can record for up to 48 hours before its battery begins to drain, its—”

you cut him off with a quiet laugh, “gray, a simple yes or no would’ve sufficed.”

he smiled, nodding and somehow putting his lips even closer without kissing you, “yes, then.” he breathed out— but you had a feeling he wasn’t really talking about the camera anymore as he pulled you in for another total mind-numbing, record breaking kiss. 

you didn’t need that camera to know that this moment would never be forgotten between the two of you.

taglist: @charsoamerican @ariabedumb @x-liv25-jamieswife @wish-i-were-heather @thecircularlibrary

@littlemissmentallyunstable @whatsamongus @anintellectualintellectual @bewitchingkisses @maybxlle

@sheisntyou @midiosaamor @emelia07 @sweetreveriee (if you’d like to be added or removed pls lmk! 🤍)

[littlemissmentallyunstable]

title: waiting for love

pairing: grayson hawthorne x reader

synopsis: grayson has been away on a business trip and you’re staying up late to wait for him to come home

warnings: fluff

a/n: thank you for reading it means a lot 🤍

tag list: there is no tag list but let me know if you want to be on it :)

Her eyes drooped down, but she fought of sleep with a highly caffeinated sword. She’d actually lost count of how many mugs of coffee she had consumed in the last few hours. But she did know that they didn’t seem to be working but she refused to let her eyes slip completely shut.

“Still up?” a voice says, jolting her up from her half-sleep.

Y/N looks up to see the eldest Hawthorne brother leaning in the doorway, cowboy hat tilted forwards slightly. She nodded slowly, too lazy to reply with her voice, inhaling another swig of hot coffee.

“You know, you don’t have to,” Nash says, walking over and sitting in the armchair opposite her.

“I know but I’m too committed now,” she shrugs, “if I fall asleep all this coffee would’ve gone to waste.”

She jerks her head towards the several mugs sat on the little table beside her, indicting her caffeine intake.

“Grayson would probably want you to go to sleep,” he urges.

“Exactly and then he wouldn’t wake me up and I want to see him,” she explains.

“Okay, okay,” Nash says, giving up slightly, “but if it gets to 4AM you have to sleep. Okay?”

“Yes dad,” she teases.

“Hey!” he exclaims in mock offence putting a sarcastic hand over his heart.

She pokes her tongue out at him sleepily. He chuckles slightly and then returns her actions.

“I’m gonna get some sleep of my own tonight, Lib is waiting for me, are you gonna be okay on your own?” He asks.

“I’ll be fine, besides I won’t be alone when Grayson gets back,” she replies.

“Okay, goodnight Y/N,” he nods.

“Night Nash,” she murmurs.

Grayson had been off in a business trip in Paris. He’d been expected to arrive back earlier but his flight had been delayed. After twelve long days without him Y/N wanted to see him as soon as he walked through the door. She’d missed him so much and admitted to no one, not even herself really, how hard it had ben without him. The nights felt colder, the days felt longer and her heart felt heavier. It wasn’t even like she’d gotten to talk to him that much over the phone, due to the time difference it proved difficult to find a good time to call. A couple of time Grayson woke in the middle of the night just to get a conversation in, but Y/N knew he needed his sleep if he were to function in all of the business meetings he was included in, so it didn’t last long.

To pass the time she began to think about a beautiful time when the two of them were on a beach in some foreign country. She couldn’t remember which one as she’d been lucky enough to go so several. She remembers laying on his chest and gazing up into his eyes, the sounds of the waves keeping them company, having conversations of sweet nothings and just enjoying each others company.

Reeling her from that memory, Y/N hears the door handle and gets a wave of shock and panic rush over her. She stands up suddenly as the door swings open. And there he is. Grayson Hawthorne. Nothing else mattered in that moment other than him. She looked at him for a few seconds, noticing the tiredness in his eyes and the aches in his limbs. He looked the same and yet so so different. Their eyes connected and it was like the first time all over again. Deja vu washes over them both.

“Grayson!” Y/N exclaims, using what was left of her energy to run towards him and wrap her arms around him.

She practically falls into his body, finally feeling at home after twelve long and hard days of being so lost. She inhales his scent, brining her a sense of comfort and familiarity.

“Sweetheart,” he murmurs into her hair, arms tightly wrapped around her torso, bringing her further into his chest, “you didn’t have to stay awake for me.”

“I wanted to,” she whispers, “and this is making it so worth it.”

Y/N melts deeper into his arms and clings to him as if she intends never to let go. She wishes time could stands still for a few more moments and this moment could be frozen. She is suddenly hit with a crashing wave of intense emotion that makes her eyes tear up. He’s here, he’s home, he’s with her.

Grayson suddenly pulls away and look at her tear stained face, “Why are you crying my love?”

“You’re home,” she chokes out, “and I’m really happy.”

Something tugs at the left side of Grayson’s chest, “sweetheart…”

“I’m fine,” she sniffs, “really.”

He takes his thumb and gently brushes away the tears, staring into her eyes.

“I’d almost forgotten how gorgeous you were,” he says, kissing her forehead.

“Even when I’ve got zero sleep and I’m crying,” Y/N challenges.

“Of course,” he replies as if the answer is obvious.

He tucks the loose strands of hair out of her eyes and cups her face in his gentle palms. He plants a slow, sweet, delicate kiss on her lips.

“You taste like coffee,” he smiles as she pulls away.

“Sorry,” she laughs sheepishly, a tinge of red in her cheeks

“I like coffee,” he reassures her.

Suddenly a tinge of red becomes a lot more prominent before she says “I think you’d be positively concerned for my well-being if you knew how much I’ve drunken tonight,”

“I’m always positively concerned for you wellbeing, love,” he murmurs.

“Oh Gray,” she says, her voice contorted with sadness and a sort of depression mixed with a dash of love and desire.

“What?” he asks gently taking her hands into his.

“I’ve missed you…” she tells him, “I’ve missed this.”

“I’ve missed you so much more, every day without you was like hell,” Grayson replies.

She chuckles softly

“I’m serious,” he presses, “it’s like nothing else matters when you’re not around. Like night and day just merge into one mess of time and sounds don’t sound right. Things that are supposed to be beautiful are just underwhelming and feeling happy just feels like an illusion of being happy because you’re not there to share it with me.”

“Grayson…” she trails off, in shock that he too felt lost without her by his side.

“Don’t ever forget that,” he tells her seriously, “that when you’re not around I go crazy.”

“I like crazy,” Y/N says, mirroring his words a few moments prior.

He smiles and then quickly takes a box out of his jacket pocket and hands it to her.

“I got this for you,” he whispers.

Y/N analyses the box skeptically. Her boyfriend was the type of person to remember the thing you said you liked the look of once and then go out and find it. Her mind races over endless possibilities of what it might be but she decides to put herself out of the misery and open the box. She gasps and stares at him, wide eyed.

How had he remembered?

Inside the box, sat on top of a layer of velvet was a breathtaking crystal butterfly.

“Do you remember when we were in Sicily together and you were talking about that book you were reading, ‘même les papillons tuent’,” he asks.

“I loved that book,” she recalls.

“I know and I saw this crystal butterfly in Paris and it reminded me of how you’d mentioned it so got one for you,” he explains

“Gray this is so beautiful,” she exclaims awestruck, gently running her fingertips across the crystal too scared to maybe breathe too harshly towards it.

“Do you like it? Because I know it isn’t the exact-“

“I love it, I love it so much,” she cuts him off, pulling him into a tight hug, so he could feel her gratitude, “I can’t believe you remembered.”

“Of course I did, my love,” he replies, kissing the top of her nose.

“But it must’ve been so expensive,” Y/N tells him, suddenly feeling a pang of guilt in her stomach.

“I don’t care how much it was, you deserve to be spoilt,” Grayson shrugs.

Heat rises in her cheek once again and she looks up at him shyly, “thank you.”

“You’re welcome.”

She gazes at the butterfly for a few moments longer, not wanting to tear her eyes from something so perfect and unique. Grayson watches her, in love with the way she is in love with the gift he’s brought back for her, in love with that twinkle in her bright eyes, in love with the smile dancing on her perfectly kissable lips. When their eyes meet again Y/N yawns a little and tries to mask the fact that she’s tired, but fails. Grayson smiles and sits down, pulling her into his lap. She curls up comfortably in his arms and slowly traces invisible drawing of various shapes on his torso. They began to discuss all of the things they’d missed about each other, venting about random encounters they’d had without the other and laughing over stupid things his brothers had done. She didn’t know how long they talked for or what they really talked about, she didn’t even remember falling asleep in his arms. But exhaustion overtook her system at some point and she drifted off.

***

Grayson awoke to the sun streaming through the curtains. He looks down to see her sleeping on his chest. She was perfection, his little ray of sunshine. He takes this moment to analyse her face. The way her eyelashes curled a little, naturally at the ends or the freckles dotted across her face he’s counted a thousand times or the just simply the way she looked so gorgeous. When he had been gone he’d envisage her features, they were fully memorised and etched into his brain but her being here in real life was so different. So much more beautiful than his mind credited her for.

He slowly takes a few strands of her hair into his hands and begins to play with it. Twisting and turning it, feeling the softness in contract with his corse fingers. He attempts a small plait, which half worked until it all fell out.

A smile danced on his lips as he used his finger tips to draw circles on her back. She makes a small sound, telling him she’d awoken from her much needed rest. She looks up at him, doe-eyed and still sleepy.

“Good morning sleeping beauty,” he smiles, tucking a chunk of her beautifully messed up hair behind her ear.

“Good morning Gray,” she replies with tired eyes and dopey smile.

“You’re so gorgeous,” he whispered, tapping the tip of her nose tentatively with a finger.

Y/N giggles softly, blushing slightly. Grayson’s smile widens admiring how sweet she looks with the pink colour now added to her cheeks. He leans in to kiss her but she turns away, so he only gets her cheeks.

“I haven’t brushed my teeth,” she complains, pushing his face away.

“Neither have I,” he shrugs.

“Still it’s gross,” she shakes her head.

“Right now I don’t care,” he whispers.”

“Woah woah woah,” she says, sitting up properly in shock, “Grayson Hawthorne not caring about hygiene… are you okay sweetheart?”

“I want to kiss you,” he replies bluntly, simply, honestly.

“Then kiss me,” she whispers, also now not caring about her unbrushed teeth.

He kisses her slowly

“God I missed this,” she whispers.

“Me too,” he murmurs.

“Tell me everything about your trip…” she says, laying her head on his bare chest and gazing up and him, her eyes wide with anticipation, love and happiness.

a/n: can’t get enough of grayson (yeah, me neither)… find more on my TIG masterlist

[whousestypewriters]

──── ୨ৎ SMUDGED LIPSTICK — GRAYSON HAWTHORNE + READER ‧₊˚

a/n: hi lovelies guess whos backkk (and with a new fic style because she's lazy at finding pics 😭) anyway no warnings with this one just gray being a cutie and jealous WHICH WE NEED MORE OF OML

"he's still staring at you." the words spoken for what seems like the hundredth time tonight leave your boyfriend - more like bodyguard at this point - as he stares down the unfortunate creature over in the corner.

otherwise known as your ex. aka the human equivalent of a dog shit. literally he's wearing the ugliest brown suit you've ever seen. why did he think dark brown on dark brown on black would suit him again?

"you would only know that if you've been staring at him too, gray," you say as you focus on collecting the small little appetiser that a nearby server is offering you. "we're literally at a function with hundreds of people, its concerning how you keep managing to find him in the crowd."

"he keeps staring at you, and its kind of hard to miss the drool coming out of his mouth." grayson's eyes are sharp when they turn to you. "i don't like it."

"you don't like a lot of things."

"this is in the top two. that and wearing leather pants." you snort and cover your hand over your mouth to try and stop the smile spreading across your face like wildfire. in the two years you and grayson have been dating the leather pants story has come up only four times - and never by grayson.

you were still in the dark about the whole situation until you cornered jameson and xander and demanded they tell you the whole story. you do not regret any of the questionable tactics you used to get it out of them one bit.

grayson eyes you suspiciously and you sober quickly deciding to drag him along the room and look for a place to sit. thats a better idea than explaining you know about the story and fight the urge to take a photo every time you see leather pants and send it to gray.

the night proceeds on and just as you think you're in the clear for not hearing another word about your trash bag ex, he shows his face. fun.

"what do you want?" grayson's voice is cold and sharp before your ex can get a word in.

"to say hi."

"you said it now leave."

"nonsense, i want to get to know the stunning lady on your arm."

ok gross. no. ew.

"what do you want grey?" you roll your eyes at the disturbingly brown suit and the horrendously styled hair on top of it.

ironic that your ex's name is grey. and your currently boyfriend who - you're pretty sure is the love of your life - is named grayson. what are the odds? pretty fucking low.

"to talk to you," the sleaze bag smiles at you, clearly avoiding grayson's deadly gaze.

"no. not happening."

grey reaches out and places a hand on your arm. "oh come on baby, you're not really still upset over-"

"she clearly said no. so leave. if not i can break the hand your touching her with. your choice." the low and threatening voice breaks into the conversation. and if you're one hundred percent completely and unapologetically honest: that's hot.

"i was her first grey," the asshole sneers

"and i'll be her last. i'm the one who takes her on dates, and treats her like the queen she is. i'm the one who remembers her favorite foods and makes sure to always have an extra hair tie around. i'm the one smudging her lipstick while she tells me she loves me. i'm her grayson and you are not."

silence ensues between the two and you stand there dumbfounded at gray's words. how could you not love this man?? the other one on the other hand...? yeah you could go a long long time without seeing that ugly asshat.

"whatever you prick," grey sneers and storms off - probably to go sulk to his mother.

when he's fully out of sight you twist back to grayson who has a tight expression on his face. he unexpectedly pulls you along and out of the bright function room and into a more secluded private spot.

"i'm sorry about that," he stresses slightly. "i didn't mean to just spit all of that out. please don't be-"

"grayson," you cut him off. "that was probably the sweetest and hottest thing i've ever seen you do. i am definitely not mad." he visible relaxes at that.

"but, i think you're going to have keep good on your promise of smudged lipstick..."

𐔌 . ⋮ 🏷️ tags .ᐟ ֹ ₊ ꒱

@arqbella, @midiosaamor, @reminiscentreader, @ecliphttlunar, @tornqdowarnings,

@catapparently, @zenikswaffleshop, @off-to-th-r4aces, @emila07

[wish-i-were-heather]

A FOOL FOR YOU PT 5⤵ GRAYSON HAWTHORNE X READER

ABOUT: 2610 words, no use of y/n (part 1, part 2, part 3, part 4)

STORY: after so long avoiding it, you and grayson finally talk about what happened and figure out what it all means

WARNINGS: none!!

TAGS: @littlemissmentallyunstable @gretag13 @lanterns-and-daydreams @whatsamongus @alwaysthefangirl @zuzanna-jadw1ga @emelia07 @f4iry-bell @low-caloriesmonsterultra @that-daughter-of-hephaestus @jimcarreyfann42 @maybxlle @xoxo-vee @elysianwayy77 @ravishinglyliving - lmk if you wanna be added to the taglist!

A/N: this took wayyyy longer than i meant it to, sorry about that. i hope you guys liked this series because it was so fun to write!! (i dont plan to continue it but who knows...)

When you woke up, you could feel the cool morning breeze making its way into your room. The birds were chirping outside, and the sun was just at the right level to where it would hit your eyes and make it hard for you to open them all the way. 

Your bed felt warmer for some reason this morning- the blanket heavier, the mattress firmer, the pillow softer. You weren’t complaining, no, it was actually a… nice change. A change from your normal routine, no matter how much you relied on it. Maybe it wasn’t really different and you were just still half asleep, or-

Wait.

You never slept with your window open. 

You shouldn’t have been able to feel the breeze. Or hear the birds. Or have that much sunlight peeking through. It wasn’t that things just felt different this morning, but this wasn’t your room.

When your eyes snapped open, they widened at the realization of who was beside you, the realization of whose arm was resting lazily across your stomach.

Grayson Davenport Hawthorne. 

Your breath caught when you saw him. Thankfully the man had put on a shirt, but he looked so unlike himself while he was asleep. 

Grayson’s usually perfectly styled hair was tousled, some light strands falling onto his forehead. His breathing was slow, steady, gentle, and you could see the rise and fall of his chest with each breath. His lips were slightly parted, making a barely audible hum with each exhale. He looked younger, more boyish in this moment of relaxation.

It was a different look on him, but not necessarily a bad one.

He stirred slightly, and you were completely frozen, only watching as he rolled over from his back to his stomach, closer to you. You had no idea what had possessed you to get into a bed with Grayson Hawthorne last night, but you were now suffering the consequences. 

You tried gently to push his arm away, but Grayson was surprisingly strong in his sleep and wouldn’t let go. In fact, it only seemed to wrap around you tighter.

He was killing you right now. 

The worst part was, your mind was blanking as to how you got there. You knew that neither of you had anything to drink, so it wasn’t that. You also would’ve been able to feel it if you were hungover. 

It was probably the mind fog from having just woken up, but you still didn’t like not remembering. 

Pushing his arm off you only proved to be futile yet again. Just as you were about to get desperate and resort to calling his name, Grayson awoke. 

Well, saying he was awake was an overstatement. Grayson let out a groan and his arm tightened around you further, like he didn’t realize it was you he was holding onto. He kicked his legs out, taking up a surprisingly large amount of the bed, almost tangled up with you.

“Hmm,” he muttered, slowly opening his eyes. “I… what the-” 

Grayson’s eyes widened like yours when he saw you next to him and saw where his hand was placed. He immediately retracted the arm and as awkward as you’d found it, part of you missed its warmth. 

He cleared his throat and spoke again. “Good morning. You’re awake.”

“Uh, yeah,” you confirmed. “Why am I-”

“In my bed?” Grayson interrupted. “After the pool last night, we came back up here and talked for a bit. You fell asleep and I didn’t want to wake you, so I figured I’d let you stay.”

Oh.

Phew.

“You should've just woken me up and I could’ve gone to my room, it’s not that big of a deal,” you told him.

“You’re a peaceful sleeper. I didn’t wish to get in the way of that.”

Did he really have you blushing this early in the morning?

“Oh, thank you,” was the only response you could manage.

Grayson sat up and ran his fingers through his hair. Everything about him looking younger and peaceful as he slept had gone away, and he was now back to his sharp eyes staring at you intensely. The eyes you could never read, the eyes that he always managed to hide so much behind.

You forced yourself to sit up too, and- oh my god you were wearing his shirt.

You hadn’t even known that Grayson owned anything besides the countless suits he always wore. And those sweatpants, apparently, from when he was drunk the other night. 

But here you were, wearing your shorts from the night before but your hoodie replaced by a soft white shirt that was far too big for you. You realized you were still wearing your swimsuit under it, but it had dried by now. 

A small noise came from his nose, just a little too loudly for it to be a normal exhale.

“What,” you groaned, sheepishly looking up to meet his eyes. “Do I really look that pathetic that I managed to make Grayson Hawthorne laugh at me?”

His corners of his mouth twitched upwards. “You don’t look pathetic. It’s just your face, you look…” he cut himself off and paused to find the right adjective. You could tell what he’d been about to say.

Please don’t say cute. For the love of all things sane, please don’t call me cute. 

“Amusing.”

Somehow, that was worse. 

You sighed and for a moment, neither of you said anything. The night before was starting to come back to you: 

After the kiss, the two of you had stayed out there and talked for a good while. You got out of the pool, put your regular clothes back on over your swimsuit. Then Grayson offered to go up to his room. You accepted the offer, and when you got up there he’d offered you one of his shirts because your hoodie had gotten wet. He then put on a shirt himself, and you simply sat on his bed and talked.

And apparently you’d fallen asleep in the same bed.

Grayson cleared his throat. “You’re thinking.”

“Yes I am.” You didn’t even bother being surprised that he could read you so easily because of course he could. 

“Is it selfish of me to guess that you’re thinking about last night?” 

“I don’t know about selfish, but it certainly wouldn’t be incorrect.” 

A beat of silence. 

You felt out of place there, sitting on the bed next to him, probably looking like a mess. But the way he looked at you during that silence proved that he wasn’t necessarily upset about your unbrushed hair or half-awake eyes or the way the sleeves of his shirt on you nearly went down to your forearms. 

“I meant everything I said,” he finally spoke. “I hope you know that.”

Oh, now he was willing to bring up the elephant in the room? Last time it had taken him a week. Though you supposed it was harder to avoid when you’d both woken up in his bed. 

“Even when you were drunk?” You asked.

His voice was surprisingly soft. “Even when I was drunk.”

Another silence. There seemed to be a lot of them that morning. And in that silence, you let the reality of what had happened settle in:

You kissed Grayson Hawthorne last night. 

Twice.

And all either of you had to say about it was some awkward banter. 

But you didn’t know what else to say. What was a kiss to someone like Grayson? Was it just a meaningless action to him? Could he just kiss someone and forget? Or was it the opposite, you’d kissed and now there was no moving on? You assumed- you hoped for the latter, and knowing him it was most likely, but you couldn’t be sure. 

He was Grayson Hawthorne, after all. Who knew how many girls wanted to kiss him. Not that he ever let them, but you wouldn’t think it strange of him to find a kiss to be worth nothing.

So you figured you just had to ask.

“What are we, Grayson?”

To your surprise, he smiled softly. 

“That depends,” he told you. “What would you like us to be?”

~~

Avery had sent you a voicemail at eleven the night before. She’d also texted you countless times ever since then, well into the morning.

By the time you left Grayson’s room, it was nine.

Your hoodie hadn’t dried overnight, so he’d let you keep his shirt. You’d tied it up to try to make it fit at least a little, but it was still far too large. And it smelled like him- that didn’t help.

You pressed play on Avery’s voicemail.

“Hello? Are you- oh, it’s a voicemail. Okay, uh, well, call me back when you can. You said you’d let me know what happens with you and Grayson. I mean since you haven’t come back yet I can assume it went well? I hope so, maybe since it’s late you guys-” She paused. “Nevermind, I don’t want to think about what you’re doing. Call me. Bye.”

You couldn’t help but laugh. What on earth did she think you were doing? But you couldn’t blame her, because you’d initially had the same thought when you woke up next to him that morning. 

Avery answered your call back almost immediately. 

“Hello?” Her voice said through the phone.

“Hey, I’m alive.”

There was a high noise from the other end, but you couldn’t quite make it out. 

“Finally! I thought you drowned in the pool or something. You wanna tell what happened? It’s been, like, twelve hours.”

Damn, she was right. You’d gone to the pool at eight last night, and it was now nine in the morning. You spent most of those hours alone with Grayson, your mind decided to remind you. You had to push the thought out of your head.

“Yeah, I’ll tell you,” you said. “In person, though. Where are you?”

“We’re in the back, by the pool. Thought it would be funny to wait for you here.”

You frowned. “Who is we-”

“Max,” she explained. There was another sound from beside her. “She says to get the fox over here, beach.”

~~

Talking to Max and Avery didn’t prove to be productive, but it had been fun. Long story short, Max thought the idea of drunk Grayson was hilarious and Avery fully thought you were joking when you told her you’d kissed.

That only offended you a little.

But the talk by the pool didn’t last too long. Eventually, you made your way back inside. You just wanted to be alone with your thoughts for longer. You still didn’t completely know how you felt about the whole situation, despite discussing it with your two closest friends. 

You realized it was almost ten o’clock and you still hadn’t had breakfast, so you went to the kitchen. As you got there, you couldn’t help but think back to when Grayson had come in, hungover yet looking completely put-together. When he’d reached into the refrigerator and grabbed cherries for some reason. 

You laughed quietly at the memory. 

“What’s so funny, hm?”

Your head snapped back and you were met once again with Grayson Hawthorne. And once again he was in a suit, his hair fixed, looking perfect. 

He had a talent for putting himself together.

“Nothing,” you replied. “I’m just thinking.”

Grayson walked over to you and nodded. “You do that a lot.”

“Yeah, well, there’s a lot to think about.”

“Care to share?”

Having a conversation with Grayson Davenport Hawthorne was always difficult. Not because of the way he spoke, no, but rather because of the way he looked. 

How were you supposed to focus with those silver-gray eyes looking down at you, with the way the corners wrinkled with each poorly hidden smile? How were you supposed to stand up straight when every time his fingers even brushed your skin you melted into his touch?

How were you supposed to exist when he did too?

Oh, right, he asked a question. 

“I’m thinking about what you said,” you told him honestly. There was no point in trying to hide your feelings from him now. 

“And remind me,” he said, moving even closer. “What did I say?”

“That you meant everything you said, even when you were drunk.”

He nodded along, but he was clearly focused more on you rather than what you were saying.

“You said you wanted my face.” You said slowly. “I know you were drunk and it was just a stupid comment, but-”

He stopped with a finger to your mouth. “We went over this the morning after, no?” Grayson’s hand moved from covering your mouth to cup your face again and it took everything you had not to lean further into it. “I would be honored to have your face.” 

Even if the words were stupid, the meaning behind them was so much stronger. 

When he leaned in to whisper in your ear you nearly fainted. 

“May I?”

You didn’t answer, but you let your arms wrap themselves around his hips as he leaned down to meet your lips with his and-

“Jeez you guys, get a room!” Grayson stood up straight at the new voice, but your hands stayed on each other. “This is like the third time this week I’ve walked in on you two kissing out in the open. Other people live here you kno-”

Xander, who had entered the kitchen and complained about your affection, completely froze when he saw you.

“You’re not Avery.” He then pointed to his brother. “You’re not Jameson.”

Grayson cleared his throat. “Xander-”

Xander gasped. “Wait, are you two, like, a thing? Like, dating? Like, kissy kissy cuddle cuddle muah muah?” 

“Xander-”

“Oh my… I knew it! I mean, I didn’t want to make any assumptions, but the two of you have been acting pretty weird for a bit now and I thought-”

“Xander-”

“-hold on. Nash owes me so much money now.”

“Xander-”

“What Gray? Of course we have a bet going. I guess my optimism is finally paying off! I was right, you are getting together! This is the best news of my life-”

“Alexander.”

Xander finally stopped rambling and looked at his brother. Grayson was absolutely glaring at him, the kind of look that spoke volumes. And coming from him, it was even louder.

“Damn,” Xander said, shaking his head. “Sorry, I didn’t know you were such a party pooper. Actually, who am I kidding, I’ve known that forever.” He shrugged. “Just… keep kissing or whatever. Good job. Er, uh, I mean-”

“Just go away, Xander.”

“Yes sir. I’m gone.”

Once the footsteps were too far to be heard, Grayson let out a sigh of relief. 

You burst out laughing. Grayson only stared at you with a blank expression, like he was waiting for you to stop, which only made you laugh harder. 

When you’d finally caught your breath, he let his hand find your face again, this time tangling itself in your hair. “My brother seems to think we’re dating.”

You didn’t try to hide the blush that covered your entire face. “And how do you feel about that, Grayson?”

He shrugged. “I wouldn’t be upset if his assumption turned out to be true.”

Silence somehow fell upon the two of you again, but this time it was different. Not unsure, not nervous, not awkward. This time, it was a comfortable silence. A silence in which you looked into his eyes. A silence in which you could finally read one of the emotions hiding behind them: 

Love.

“Grayson?”

“Yes?”

“I think I figured out what I want us to be.”

the writing above belongs to me. please do not copy, modify, repost on other sites or claim as your own. © 2024 wish-i-were-heather