#having said that i am begging you not to drop wildly traumatic events from yr past into our second ever conversation completely unprompted.

[pooklet]

harsh though it may sound and unintended though it may be, trauma-dumping on someone you barely know sends the message that you do not see them as a real person. by doing so, you fail to take into account experiences that they might've had or how your words could be upsetting to them. you're treating them like a receptacle for your pain, rather than a person who is affected by your words.

it wouldn't be appropriate for someone to approach you in the grocery store and tell you all about their experience with sexual assault, and it's not appropriate for you to do that to someone on the internet. we might access the internet from our homes, but it is a public space.

there are no hard rules for human interaction but honestly i think everyone online would benefit hugely from operating under the assumption that, unless you have been given a specific reason to think otherwise in discrete instances, internet strangers do not want to be approached with:

your trauma, illnesses, or deep-rooted self worth issues

any come-ons or sexual content

over-familiar playful rudeness

information about your dnd characters/ocs

disagreements with their harmless subjective opinions

if it is your first time speaking with someone i can not highly enough recommend that these do not be your opening topics