#having both jey and jimmy losing lately...

[taydaq]

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[solarsonicsoda]

The Road to... Wrestlemania XL

Part 1: Roman Reigns & The Rock vs. Cody Rhodes & Seth Rollins, Seth Rollins vs. Drew McIntyre, and Roman Reigns vs. Cody Rhodes

On 30th August 2020, nearly over 3 and a half years ago, Roman Reigns won the WWE Universal Championship in his return match. On 7th April 2024, he will enter the main event of Wrestlemania XL Sunday still champion, as well as the WWE Champion. This is the Tribal Chief.

Roman Reigns "The Tribal Chief", leader of The Bloodline, and member of the legendary Anoa'i family. Standing at 6'3'', weighing 265lbs, from Pensacola, Florida, USA, he is the reigning Universal Champion for 1300+ consecutive days, and reigning WWE Champion for 720+ days. Finishers: Spear, Guillotine Hold

Reigns has been the top of the WWE ever since. This brutal bad guy has used his power and familial ties to reign supreme across the whole roster. He's defeated pretty much every major name in the company, he's turned even on his close family in Jey Uso, done it multiple times too, and he's only taken one pinfall loss in this whole reign. There is no stopping Roman Reigns.

Cody Rhodes hopes that isn't true though.

Cody Rhodes "The American Nightmare", son of the legendary Dusty Rhodes, seeking to finally claim the WWE Title for his family since returning to the company. Standing at 6'2'', weighing 220lbs, from Marietta, Georgia, USA, he is the winner of the Royal Rumble 2024, the first man to win consecutive Rumble matches since 1998. Finisher: Cross Rhodes

Cody Rhodes made his WWE debut in 2007, aged just 22. He was with the company for 9 years, and while he achieved success, this waned and he grew frustrated. He left, and over the next 6 years he would play a part in changing the wrestling industry. He would take the independent scene by storm, be a major player in other companies like New Japan Pro Wrestling and Impact Wrestling, and he would even form WWE's current biggest rival company, All Elite Wrestling.

He was a key part of AEW's early success, and many there cite him as a big help to them in the company. He was an Executive Vice President and one of the biggest stars they had, but in 2022, Rhodes decided he had unfinished business in the WWE. He would leave AEW at the expiry of his contract, and at Wrestlemania 38 in Arlington, Texas, USA, he would return to the WWE. His opponent that night? Seth "Freakin'" Rollins

Seth Rollins "The Visionary", former indie standout who's now one of the major stars on the WWE roster Standing at 6'1'', weighing 225lbs, from Davenport, Iowa, USA, he is a multi-time world champion and as of now, World Heavyweight Champion for 300+ days Finisher: Blackout Stomp

These two men would feud for the early months of Rhodes' WWE return, with the American Nightmare coming out on top in every match, but Rhodes made it clear what his goal was. He aimed to "finish the story" and become WWE Champion, the title his legendary late father was never able to achieve in his career. Fast-forward to the Royal Rumble 2023. After missing much of 2022 with a torn pectoral, an injury he would wrestle through in a Hell in a Cell match, Rhodes had returned. Now, out of thirty men, he was the only one not to be thrown over the top rope with both feet hitting the floor. Cody Rhodes had won the 2023 Royal Rumble. With this victory, he'd challenge Undisputed WWE Universal Champion Roman Reigns at Wrestlemania 39. The Tribal Chief had by this point become both WWE and Universal Champion, which are the two top titles for men's wrestlers in the WWE. Having seemingly achieved all there was to achieve, many thought this would be the night Reigns finally loses these belts... But this isn't what happened.

Like so many others, even with all his momentum, Rhodes was undone by The Bloodline. This faction built around Reigns consisted then of his "wise man" Paul Heyman and three cousins of Reigns': Jey Uso, Jimmy Uso, & Solo Sikoa. It was the youngest of these three brothers, Solo, who would use his Samoan Spike finisher to tee Rhodes up for Reigns and his Spear. Roman Reigns had defeated Cody Rhodes.

This was a pretty big shock for fans, but as they hoped, Rhodes didn't let this keep him down. He would feud with high-ranking wrestler Brock Lesnar, winning that feud, as well as briefly holding the Tag Team Championships alongside Jey Uso, who had recently defected from The Bloodline. This year, he would again win the Royal Rumble, giving him a choice: face Reigns again for his Undisputed Title, or instead challenge old foe Rollins for his World Heavyweight Championship.

Reigns seemed to be Rhodes' choice before a man who likely needs no introduction reared his bald head.

The Rock Dwayne Johnson, Rocky Maivia, "The People's Champ", "The Great One", "The Most Electrifying Man in Sports Entertainment", and another member of the Anoa'i family. Standing at 6'5'', weighing 260lbs, from Miami, Florida, USA, he is one of the most decorated world champions in WWE history as well as, y'know, The Rock Finishers: Rock Bottom, People's Elbow

The Rock returned to the WWE, having just become a major shareholder in parent company TKO, and he had his sights set on his cousin, Roman Reigns. Cody seemed to let Rock step up to the plate to take on Reigns, perhaps indicating he would take on World Heavyweight Champion Seth Rollins. However, it was at the Wrestlemania XL Kickoff Event, as the two possible tribal chiefs stood face-to-face, that Cody stood back up and declared he wanted to face Roman Reigns at Wrestlemania XL.

Unfortunately, as he condemned the frequently absent and dishonourable champion, Rhodes drew the ire of The Rock when he suggested Reigns brought shame on the family. Unwittingly, Cody Rhodes had created a dangerous alliance as Reigns and Rock joined forces against the "Grandson of a Plumber". However, a surprising ally revealed himself in the form of Seth Rollins. He and Reigns were once close friends, reigning as Tag Team Champions as part of the impactful Shield team. Rollins is also the only title challenger of Reigns' he never truly defeated, losing by disqualification.

Over the coming weeks, many of Rock's grandiose stylings returned as this super Bloodline team were out for Rhodes & Rollins. The newest iteration of The Rock was here: The Final Boss. Rhodes would challenge Rock for a match on Night One, but The Bloodline would propose a counter offer: Wrestlemania XL, Night One. Rhodes & Rollins vs. Reigns & Rock. If Rhodes' team wins, then The Bloodline are barred from ringside on Night Two. If The Bloodline win, then it's Bloodline Rules, meaning anything goes. Rhodes & Rollins would accept. The stage was set... but there's another story that we haven't mentioned.

Drew McIntyre "The Scottish Warrior", a top level wrestler who's justifiably frustrated with everyone around him, and a contender for Hater of the Year. Standing at 6'5'', weighing 275 lbs, from Ayr, Ayrshire, Scotland, he's a multi-time WWE Champion but never got to hold the title with fans in attendance due to the COVID-19 Pandemic. Finisher: Claymore Kick

At Elimination Chamber 2024, McIntyre would outlast five other men to earn the number one contendership for the World Heavyweight Championship held by Seth Rollins. He has had issues with much of the roster for sometime, all stemming from... The Bloodline. At Clash at the Castle 2022, McIntyre, a hometown-ish hero, would fail to defeat Roman Reigns due to Bloodline interference. For this, he would never forgive any of these men. This included later defectees, Sami Zayn and Jey Uso. He would take umbrage with both men and with the likes of Rhodes & Rollins for forgiving them. McIntyre would also become a dedicated hater of the returning CM Punk, but the story of "DM Hunk" is one for another day.

Adding one more reasonable gripe to the salty Scotsman's list of complaints, Rollins seems to have largely overlooked his challenger for Night Two of Wrestlemania XL. With a man so angry on his tail, should Rollins really be tussling with The Bloodline?

Tensions have been escalating week-by-week, with The Bloodline looking to get one over on their fan-favourite foes every week. The Rock even unleashed a brutal attack on Cody Rhodes just two weeks out from the show, leaving him in a heap. With the star-studded tag team main event of Night One leading into two major championship matches on Night Two, Wrestlemania XL's biggest matches are set with a lot of moving parts between the three of them. What's gonna happen? There's only one way to find out...

For those of you interested in seeing this story unfold in preperation for the Showcase of the Immortals, WWE have put out a video including much of this build, as well as posting many of the segments in full on their YouTube. Find the compilation video here for the Bloodline story, and here for Drew vs. Seth.

[wrestlingisfake]

Smackdown Fake Rankings, 9/6/2020

Men’s heavyweight singles division - babyfaces

Bray Wyatt

Jeff Hardy (WWE intercontinental champion)

Jey Uso

Big E

Matt Riddle

Drew Gulak

Men’s heavyweight singles division - heels

Roman Reigns (WWE universal champion)

Braun Strowman

AJ Styles

Sheamus

King Corbin

Shorty G

WWE’s official position seems to be that Reigns and Strowman are heels and Wyatt is a babyface.  This would have been a lot clearer if any of them had done a full-fledged turn--as it is, Braun and Roman really haven’t done anything Bray wouldn’t do.  But at least they’ve technically got the heels and faces balanced out over here.

They’ve begun setting up Reigns vs. Uso and Hardy vs. Styles vs. Sami Zayn.  It looks like Big E vs. Sheamus and Corbin vs. Riddle will just keep going.  Wyatt and Strowman probably need to settle their issues once and for all.  Man, it’d be real funny if they do a Hell in a Cell match, considering that each of them was involved in the two cell matches that failed to settle anything.

In the long term, I get the feeling they’re prepping Big E for a main event run.  They could go with Reigns vs. Wyatt for Wrestlemania, but I think Reigns vs. Big E would be more productive.  As for Wyatt, if he’s going to be a face I’d feed midcard heels to him like he’s mid-90s Undertaker.  Of course, they’re talking about doing another draft to rearrange the rosters, so none of this may matter in a few weeks.

Women’s singles division - babyfaces

Sasha Banks

Mandy Rose

Nikki Cross

Tamina

Dana Brooke

Women’s singles division - heels

Bayley (WWE Smackdown women’s champion)

Lacey Evans

Bayley just turned on Banks the other day, so Sasha hasn’t had a chance to get back up and do anything babyface-like.  All the same, I assume she’s turning face, although knowing WWE she’ll just continue being a jerk who happens to feud with heels.

Other than Banks and Bayley, the most heavily promoted woman on the roster may be Rose.  Thing is, Mandy only had two or three matches all summer, and now that she’s done with Sonya Deville it’s possible they’ll just present her as Otis’s girlfriend.  Everyone else here (Cross, Tamina, Brooke, and Evans) hasn’t done much besides lose a battle royale a few weeks ago.

With Banks and Bayley split up, and Cross trying to figure out if Alexa Bliss is turning heel or not, there are no women’s tag teams on Smackdown.  They’ll probably throw one together after the champions (Shayna Baszler and Nia Jax) run out of contenders on Raw or NXT.  But that might not be for a few months.

Men’s tag team division - babyfaces

Heavy Machinery - Otis (Mr. Money in the Bank) & Tucker

Lucha House Party - Kalisto & Gran Metalik & Lince Dorado

Men’s tag team division - heels

Shinsuke Nakamura & Cesaro (WWE Smackdown tag team champions)

The Miz & John Morrison

I think they’re building to Lucha House Party challenging for the tag titles.  Meanwhile Morrison has stolen Otis’s Money in the Bank briefcase, potentially setting up a two-on-two match over a contract for a singles title match.

I don’t get the sense that WWE has a plan for Otis and the MITB contract.  Fans keep wondering if he can use it to challenge for the tag title, which reveals two things.  First, people ask questions like this because they cannot discern the answers for themselves from where Otis’s storyline is headed, because WWE has done nothing to push him except as part of a comedy tag team.  Second, the fans can tell Otis would get creamed by anyone who’s been universal champion lately, so they’d rather see him cash in for a match he could actually win.

No matches in over 30 days: Alexa Bliss, Bo Dallas, Carmella, Daniel Bryan, Jaxson Ryker, Mojo Rawley, Sami Zayn, Steve Cutler, Wesley Blake

Bliss hasn’t wrestled since she was “abducted” by Wyatt, and they’re doing a thing where we’re supposed to wonder how the experience changed her.  Zayn was gone for months waiting out the pandemic, but I suppose he finally decided he couldn’t wait forever.

As far as I can determine Carmella, Bryan, and Rawley haven’t appeared at a WWE show in person since the big COVID-19 outbreak in June.  I assume Bryan decided to stay home for the safety of his family and won’t be back soon.  Carmella posted some workout footage recently, so even if she caught COVID in the June outbreak, she’s clearly healthy now.  Mojo’s unexplained absence, however, is perfectly consistent with his entire WWE tenure.

Ryker, Cutler, and Blake have been in the doghouse ever since Ryker picked a really bad time to kiss Donald Trump’s ass.  I don’t think Dallas has even appeared on TV in 2020.

Part-time/semi-retired: Goldberg, John Cena, Kane

Inactive

Elias (chest/shoulder - pectoralis tear)

Ember Moon (right ankle - Achilles tendon tear)

Jimmy Uso (knee - unspecified injury)

Kofi Kingston (unspecified injury - maybe kayfabe?)

Lars Sullivan (knee - unspecified injury)

Xavier Woods (right ankle - Achilles tendon tear)

Sullivan was originally projected to be back by June 2020.  We know nothing about Kofi’s situation except that he was supposed to be out for “six weeks,” and that was six weeks ago.  Woods should be ready soon, and I assume that’s why he’s doing the Talking Smack show.  Although, given Ember’s problems--her injury may end her career--you can’t take an Achilles tear lightly.

I don’t know what the timetable is for Jimmy Uso.  My guess is that Roman Reigns squashes Jey Uso on September 27, and then they both return together as a tag team.  But that might be six weeks or six months from now.

There doesn’t appear to be any info on Elias’s injury beyond the kayfabe reports from WWE.  We know he has pectoralis tear, but not whether the tear is at the shoulder or breastbone, or the severity of the tear.  The only word is that he’s expected to miss Wrestlemania 37, which is seven months away.

[jwgammuto]

Go Home Smackdown Live for WrestleMania 35 Review 4/2/19

Last stop on the Road to Wrestlemania for the Blue Brand. SD Live has been the better show for almost the entirety of 2019, let’s find out if that trend continues on the go home show with a little of The Good, The Bad, and the WTF: Potato Face Edition.

The Good: Daniel Bryan continues his absolutely perfect heel work at the contract signing. Kofi’s stoicism and then flipped switch to emotion was also kind of fun but DB is the real star here playing with the crowd and flat out ignoring them when necessary. This was a significantly better send off to Mania for a big title match than Lesnar and Rollins gave us. If I have a complaint, it’s how irritatingly goofy Big E insists on constantly being. He basically gyrated his junk and made cocaine faces for the entirety of this segment and while I get that his deal is he’s a fun goof, it distracted from a solid segment that didn’t really need him or Woods.

The KO Show. Sure there’s about 100 ways they could be making better use of such a talented guy but these segments tend to be a million times better than Moment of Bliss so for this I am thankful. AJ and Orton continued the trade digs here in what has been a pretty good WWE Vet vs Indie Darling angle. I do question what the hell they can do at WM now that they’ve blown the whole Forearm into RKO bit but I’m pretty sure this match will still be good.

Samoa Joe gets back on track with a win over Ali. Much as I like Ali, this was absolutely necessary. Joe has been losing too much lately and he needed to look dominant here and did.

Otis. Basically everything he does on tv will go in this column for the foreseeable future.

Sanity makes a TV appearance, albeit to job in a handicap match to the Miz. Shane continues to be ok, not great, as a heel McMahon. This match build has been awkward but certainly not terrible. Looking forward to Shane’s insanity Sunday.

The Bad: Lazy booking in the form of an 18 person inter gender tag match that eventually devolved into a battle royal preview. This wasn’t without highlights such as Otis courting Mandy, Rose and Benjamin’s hi-five, Nikki Cross being a nut, and Asuka standing tall after Jeff Hardy foolishly turned his back on her, but ultimately this was a forced way to highlight the WM battle royals that no one cares about and felt unnecessary in a show that should be focusing on promoting consistent interest in a show that will be as long as a work day.

Becky Lynch’s rare weak promo. Basically a recap of what happened on Monday night, which was slightly lackluster to me anyway. I didn’t need anything quite so dramatic and overdone as Raw’s segment, but something more effective than Lynch standing on a desk regurgitating the same old schlock she’s been feeding us for two months felt lazy and weak.

The IIconics cut a promo ahead of the fatal four way title match at ‘Mania. Pretty boilerplate stuff from Peyton and Billie. Not that it’s horrible, it’s what they do, it just didn’t do much to convince me that they can win. So mildly pointless?

The WTF: The Twist of Fate. Riddle me this. Why do different performers sell it different and why is only when Jeff does the move? EC3 sells it last night as a half assed stunner, as many do. This move used to be a variation on the diamond cutter and it looked awesome. Some people still sell it this way, particularly when Matt does it, but when Jeff does the exact same move, about 2/3 of the time, the opponent sells it as a weird shitty version of the stunner. I want an explanation. Can I get some continuity anywhere with this product anymore?

The Smackdown Tag Title Picture and Alexa Bliss booking matches. The USOs are great. Them having the titles, while not 100% ideal due to the number of times they’ve had them already, is fine. What isn’t fine is no feud built to the biggest show of the year for these guys. They never seem to get a fair shake this time of year and WM 35 is no exception. Another freakin Fatal Four Way is inexplicably booked after we just watched the exact same match by the host of Wrestlemania, Alexa Bliss. She refers to the no no Jimmy and Jey had last week when the forfeited their gauntlet match in the name of KofiMania. This would have been far better served if it had come straight from Vince. He’s become a bit of a half assed authority and Bliss is the host of a show, not the GM. Why is she passing this message or making the match? It just feels dumb.

Finally, on to Aleister Black and Ricochet. How many title opportunities are these guys going to get in 30 days? Let’s count em up. Two against the Revival, both lost. This will be number 2 for the SD titles, one already lost. And they get a shot against the War Raiders on Friday night. That’s a fiver. It’s not that I don’t like these two guys. It just doesn’t make a ton of sense why they’re a team in the first place and despite losing every major title chance they get, they continue to get chances. I can’t imagine they beat the War Raiders at TakeOver. Maybe they win at Mania, which honestly I prefer over them winning the Raw titles from The Revival at any point. But what if they don’t? Then what? Some direction would be nice.

Certainly not awful but definitely lacked a real holy shit moment that made WM must see. The contract signing was good but not so good that I’m desperate to see Bryan and Kofi. There’s whispers that Mysterio might be hurt and out for the US title match so the Joe squashing Ali makes sense. God help us if Cena replaces Rey. How about Andrade? Or Ali in a rematch? Or even the triumphant return of the United States of Truth! Or.....OTIS! Similarly to Raw, there was stuff to like, other to not. Unbalanced, not amazing go home show gets 3.5 big Hogan Belt Whips because it did do a couple of things very well and there was little face palming. Stay tuned for One Chance in Hell this week, my fantasy booking for the Showcase of the Immortals. Top Guy.....out.

[gamerssphere]

It is that time of the year where we get a lot of people fighting while inside a cage. It is the WWE Elimination Chamber Pay-Per-View event of the year.

Note before continuing: Our articles regarding WWE Pay-Per-View events are written as the event goes on. Minor updates are done before publishing so the views you find in here are those of the writer at the time of the event.

Kickoff Show

Buddy Murphy defends the title against Akira Tozawa. The match started fast, with Tozawa throwing the champ out of the ring, but after failing a move against the champ who was still outside the ring, everything went downhill for him.

Of course, disrespect towards the 205 superstars kept on going from the WWE, as they brought a promo from Xavier Woods and Big E backstage, about their teammate’s appearance in the Elimination Chamber match later on.

Tozawa retook ownership of the match, even hitting a huge reversal on top of the corner, with a super Hurracarana on the champ. Of course, either Murphy is awful at selling the hits he receive, or they are trying to make him look unbeatable, but as soona s they both got up, Murphy was dominating again.

The match was going back and forth, with Tozawa bringing the best moves, even hitting his finisher on Murphy, but while the champ was hanging from the second row, but Tozawa didn’t seem to be able to get a pin on Murphy, until the champ hit his finisher and got the win.

  We get to see Charly Carusso interviewing Mark Henry, who says he is going with The Iiconics to win the Women’s Tag Team Titles, as well as Kofi Kingston coming out as WWE Champion. Seems like WWE has recovered a locker room captain!

This concludes the kickoff show and now, on to the main show of the Pay-Per-View!

Main Show

Women’s Tag Team Championships Elimination Chamber Match

The match started with Sonya Deville & Mandy Rose against Bayley & Sasha Banks. Sasha and Bayley started dominating; however there was a change in roles and Mandy with Sonya started to cause some damage. Of course, things change fast.

The third team came in: Riott Squad. This could easily be their territory, in case they bring the most savage side of the team. They started hard, attacking both, Sasha and Bayley, until they were out of action.

We get a street fight in the middle of the ring between the remaining two teams, really good indeed. The whole fight ended up with a Superplex against Bayley and The Iiconics entering the match, just to start trying to pin everyone (besides Bayley, who was the last one they tried to pin…of course) and failing at it.

Now every other team is out, and we have The Iiconics vs Sasha and Bayley, but in the end, the latter always get out of any pin attempt against them. It is time for the fifth team to arrive: Naomi and Carmella.

The first near pin was from Naomi to Sarah Logan, but Liv saved her teammate. Now it was time for us to see every single finisher, which finished with everyone laying on the mat.

The first eliminated team was, surprisingly, Naomi and Carmella on the hands of The Iiconics!

Finally, the last team enters, and Nia Jax along with Tamina simply annihilated everyone. Ending with the elimination of The Iiconics, only for the Riott Squad to get to the action and start causing a lot of damage on Nia and Tamina.

The strategy in here is easy: go against Nia and Tamina. But Bayley and Sasha preferred to go first against Mandy and Sonya, then against Nia and Tamina and then against the Riott Squad.

The next eliminated team, unfortunately, was the Riott Squad. Now, Nia and Tamina attack Sasha and Bayley, but it ends with Nia going through one of the pods, in the fakest “reversal” ever, as Bayley never moved, Nia simply “failed” to end up with everybody attacking Tamina, ending with both of the teams pinning her while Nia was out of action.

The first champions will be either of the two teams to start the match.

No surprises here, Bayley and Sasha are the first Champions.

Just an interesting piece of information: with Sasha Banks and Bayley becoming the inaugural champions for the Women’s Tag Team division, every single one of the WWE Four Horsewomen have been the inaugural champions at one point.

SmackDown Tag Team Championship Match

Before the match started, Miz brought his wife Maryse to announce that she is pregnant again!

After this announcement and the legal problems the Usos faced earlier this week…is there any doubt the belts won’t be changing hands?

The match started and there’s no doubt in my mind that The Usos will lose. 100% of the time, Miz and Shane were dominating and when they were getting attacked, they reversed everything. Of course, we can’t have a one-sided match unless it is a Brock Lesnar match, so The Usos went full heel and started to work against The Miz.

At one point we see Shane hitting a Coast to Coast against one of the Usos, but the second one was reversed with a Superkick. Miz saved his partner and their championships when Shane was about to get pinned.

Have you ever seen Jimmy fail a move and hit Jey? Well, that’s what happened in here. Do you still have any doubts about who will win?

The match went through with Shane hitting his move on top of the announce table, only for Miz to end up being pinned. I’m really shocked this time, and this is what I like seeing.

Intercontinental Championship Handicap Match

Is it Finn’s time to shine with a title? We hope so, but this is an uphill road. Lio, though, might be Lashley’s Achilles Heel.

It was already expected to see Lio Rush acting as the bonus of the match. Every time Lashley is in troubles, he is intervening. Not only that, he is Lashley’s green card to take a break from the match.

When Lashley was about to finish Balor, Lio stole the tag but he failed his attack lon Finn. This was the end of it all. Finn went all in for this opportunity and ended up getting the pinfall on Lio and becoming the new Intercontinental Champion.

RAW Women’s Championship

We start with a senseless interview with Charlotte Flair in the middle of the ring. Then the important started as Ruby Riott got in the ring, followed by the champion, who seems to be wearing a costume for her character in Mortal Kombat XI. Ronda should stick to this in-ring attire.

Of course, through the match, Ronda was dominating, and Ruby just running away from her. Super fast match, Ronda retains and now Ronda gets Charlotte to get to the ring.

Of course, we know there’ll be a Triple Threat match at Wrestlemania, so Becky Lynch appeared and destroyed Charlotte. Then Ronda. Both ended up bleeding. Really forced storyline, but I like it.

No Disqualification Match

Why is Baron Corbin still fighting in Manager’s clothes? This is now stupid. How long until McIntyre gets in this match?

The first person to take advantage of the -lack of- rules of the match was Corbin, who took a Kendo Stick against The Monster Among Men, but it didn’t make much damage anyways.

I’m most certainly not a fan of how easily manageable the WWE is making Braun look lately. Seemed way too easy for Baron to get him down. This isn’t a Monster Among Men, this is just a really tall guy now.

Braun brought a table to the ring and hit his finisher through the table, but at the time he was going to pin Corbin, oh! Drew McIntyre and Bobby Lashley.

3 on 1 that’s the way to defeat Braun now.

WWE Championship Elimination Chamber Match

Every superstar got to the chamber, Daniel Bryan comes out with Erick Rowan and gives one of his usual speeches during which, the referees took Rowan out of ringside. This is something I like seeing, the champion defending the belt coming first to the chamber.

What an awful belt! Sorry, but I entirely hate it. I also hate Bryan’s current persona.

The first two are Bryan and Joe. Bryan goes all coward and runs away as much as possible, until he couldn’t anymore. Then, Joe started to apply all the submission moves he knows, besides his finisher.

Now it was Kofi’s time. Daniel goes up at the top of Kofi’s pod while Samoa and Kofi fight; however, Kofi goes up there and fights him, until we get to see the first high risk move when Kofi throws himself against Bryan and Joe from the top of the steel cage.

Now we have AJ Styles coming in. Daniel Bryan goes all in against Styles, and we see the first hich speed fight now. Samoa goes against Kofi to try and get revenge, but AJ Styles eliminates him from the match right before Jeff Hardy gets into the match.

Now we see another high risk move from Jeff Hardy against AJ Styles as he hit a Swanton Bomb from the top of the pod while AJ was laying at the top of the corner, only to be hit by Bryan and eliminated.

It is time for Randy Orton to get in. He is super focused, acting as a pure viper. Slowly, strategically, perfectly. We lose our sights of Randy Orton for a while, but he was just calculating. Then, out of nowhere, he hits an RKO on AJ Styles and we now only have 3 superstars in the match.

When Randy was going to hit an RKO on Kofi, Bryan interfered and this ended with Randy getting hit by Kofi’s finisher and getting eliminated. It will be either Kofi or Bryan now. We want Kofi, but we don’t know just yet.

They went with everything they had against each other, Kofi even got to hit his SOS but Bryan kicked out of the pin. Who will win? We predicted Daniel Bryan, now we are hesitating.

This is back and forth, with the crowd going all for Kofi. We are going for Kofi too. Unfortuantely, he missed one move outside the ring, and this took out his momentum leading to Daniel Bryan hitting his finisher, but Kofi kicked out again!

Unfortunately, our prediction became a reality and Daniel Bryan was able to defeat Kofi and retain the title. This was certainly the best match of the night.

Final Thoughts

Elimination Chamber was a great event. We went from getting the first ever Women’s Tag Team Champions to seeing new champions on pretty much every title match besides Ronda’s and Daniel Bryan’s. The low point of the even? Ruby Riott getting squashed. The high point? Kofi Kingston.

#WWE #WWEChamber #EliminationChamber2019 - The Good, The Bad & The Ugly It is that time of the year where we get a lot of people fighting while inside a cage.

[geektified]

New Post has been published on http://www.geektified.com/2017/06/07/the-smackdown-files-devil-in-a-blue-dress-the-reinvention-of-lana-edition-6-6-2017/

The SmackDown Files: Devil In A Blue Dress - The Reinvention of Lana Edition (6-6-2017)

By: Keila Cash

  Hello everyone and welcome to another installment of The SmackDown Files. Tonight’s episode of SmackDown Live emanated from the Blue Cross Arena in Rochester, New York. History will be made at Money in the Bank as the women will compete in the eponymous ladder match to determine the first-ever Ms. MITB. Throw in Mr. MITB and we have ourselves a makeshift prom that requires a double coronation. In all seriousness, it’s pretty damn cool that the women have been given this opportunity to shine on the big stage. With one week to go until the PPV, did WWE continue to raise the stakes or was it back to business as usual? The answer to that question can be found throughout this blog. Without further ado, let’s dissect tonight’s episode of SD Live in no particular order.

  Shane McMahon had an unveiling ceremony for the Women’s Money in the Bank briefcase and warned Tamina, Natalya, Carmella, Becky Lynch, and Charlotte that they are entering dangerous territory by competing in the first-ever Women’s MITB Ladder match, but whoever comes away with the briefcase has a very good shot at winning the SmackDown Women’s Championship because MITB winners are 15-2 when it comes cash-ins.

  The ladies got a chance to speak their peace before Naomi came out and put them on notice that she wasn’t going down without a fight.

  Lana made her SD Live debut and told that Shane that she wanted to be added to the MITB Ladder match. Naomi started to snort and laugh into the microphone as Lana asked her what was so funny.

  Naomi asked Lana who she has beaten and started to hum the Jeopardy! theme song. Lana said she could beat Naomi which made the crowd ooh and ah.

  Charlotte and Becky Lynch were the MVPs of the segment as their facial expressions were on point and shady as hell.

  Shane told Lana that championship opportunities must be earned which caused her to throw a hissy fit before leaving the ring in a huff. Shane-O-Mac booked a six-woman tag team match featuring Becky Lynch, Charlotte, and Naomi vs. Natalya, Carmella, and Tamina kicked which took place after the commercial break.

  This was a fine way to kick off the show. I hate to agree with James Ellsworth, but Shane McMahon mansplaining the rules of the MITB Ladder Match was a little grating. The rest of the segment was fine as Lana made a splash by trying to charm her way into a shot at the Women’s Championship. It didn’t work, but she was far from done when it came to scheming her way into the title picture.

  Natalya, Carmella, and Tamina defeated Becky Lynch, Charlotte, and Naomi when Tamina nailed Naomi with a Superkick for the win. Lana provided the assist when she sauntered down to the ring and tripped Naomi on the ring apron which set up the finish.

  The million dollar question is quite simple. Can Lana hold her own in the ring without relying on her sex appeal? We shall find out soon enough.

  Mojo Rawley pleaded his case to Shane McMahon about being added to the MITB Ladder Match. Shane appreciated Rawley’s passion and booked him in a match against Jinder Mahal. If Rawley is victorious, he will be added to the MITB Ladder Match.

  AJ Styles defeated Dolph Ziggler with the Styles Clash in a solid match. Ziggler had several near falls on Styles and even used the ropes as added leverage on a couple of occasions in order to pick up the cheap win.

  Styles withstood the chicanery and evened the score from last week. The dreaded 50/50 booking strikes again, but I’m glad The Phenomenal One is back in the win column. It should’ve happened in Atlanta last week, but I digress.

  The Fashion Files had me rolling once again as Fandango and Tyler Breeze tried to clear up the Cologne-Colons case from last week. The Colons didn’t trash their office which means only one thing: Someone else is out to get them. The plot thickens!

  Meanwhile, The New Day asked Breezango if they had any information on The Usos leading up to their SmackDown Tag Team Championship match at MITB next Sunday. The Fashionistas were more than happy to oblige as Big E tried to give Fandango a romper as a thank you gift. Fandango through the garment down, but Breeze was more than happy to put it on as another edition of The FF came to a close. This was another gem of a segment.

  Jinder Mahal defeated Mojo Rawley with the Cobra Clutch Slam in a decent match. Mahal’s in-ring style continues to be rudimentary as he delivered an ugly clothesline to Rawley midway through the match. Outside of that, everything was fine for the most part.

  After the match was over, Mahal cut another bland promo about Orton being a sickness he must cure at MITB. After he was done with The Viper, the fans would have no choice but to accept him as WWE Champion. Mahal proceeded to cut a promo in Punjabi as the segment came to a close.

  Mahal continues to be a supporting player despite holding the richest prize in professional wrestling.

  The New Day defeated The Colons when Xavier Woods pinned Epico with the Midnight Hour in a decent match.

  The Usos came out and cracked some jokes at The New Day’s expense. Jimmy told Kofi Kingston that he needed a tutu to complete his ensemble while he wondered if Big E’s name represented his bra size. Jey capped things off when he told Xavier Woods to look UpUpDownDown while making fun of his elf shoes.

  The Usos reminded the trio that the fun and games would come to an end at MITB as the segment came to an end.

  The Usos cut another good promo, but the material was kind of weak. Fortunately, their personalities made things more tolerable which speaks to how much Jimmy and Jey have improved on the mic over the past few months.

  Naomi will face Lana for the SmackDown Women’s Title at MITB next Sunday. This a big test for both ladies. Here’s hoping they pass with flying colors.

  Baron Corbin is a professional backstage attacker as he attacked Sami Zayn once again. Lather, Rinse, Repeat.

  Shinsuke Nakamura defeated Kevin Owens with the Kinshasa in a good main event match. Owens dominated early on before Nakamura took control down the stretch. Owens being on a losing streak sucks, but he should be able to recover by having a strong performance at MITB.

  Nakamura didn’t get a chance to celebrate his win as Baron Corbin dropped him with End of Days as SD Live went off the air with Corbin standing tall on the main stage.

  Corbin is the latest man to make a statement heading into MITB. I think it’s safe to assume that Nakamura vs. Corbin is a lock for next week’s go-home show unless Sami Zayn is thrown into the mix to make things a Triple Threat affair. We shall find out soon enough.

  Overall, I thought tonight’s episode of SmackDown Live was decent at best. WWE did a nice job hyping the Money in the Bank PPV which takes place next Sunday. The in-ring action was fine, but it was nothing to write home about for the most part.

  This felt like placeholder episode until next week’s go-home show in New Orleans. With NOLA hosting their final televised event before next year’s WrestleMania, WWE should go all-out in terms of hyping MITB. This could be a great PPV if it’s booked properly. The television leading up to the show has been okay, but the final hard sell needs to provide that extra oomph that’s been missing from the blue brand as of late. Let’s hope the creative team gets the job done. Fingers crossed!

  This wraps up another edition of The SmackDown Files. I hope you enjoyed it and I will back next week with a brand new installment of The Raw Exposé. See you later, boys and girls!

[wrestlingisfake]

Fastlane preview

AJ Styles vs. John Cena vs. Kevin Owens vs. Sami Zayn vs. Baron Corbin vs. Dolph Ziggler - This is a six-way match for Styles’s WWE championship.  All the participants are legal to wrestle at the same time, and the first one to score a pinfall or submission will be the winner and champion.  This is expected to be the final title match before the champion defends against Shinsuke Nakamura at Wrestlemania XXXIV on 4/8.

Originally this was supposed to be Styles defending against the winner of Owens vs. Zayn on 2/7, as part of Shane McMahon’s efforts to thwart the Owens/Zayn alliance.  That match was ruled no-contest when Styles interfered, so Daniel Bryan declared both men would be in this title match.  Since then, Corbin, Ziggler, and Cena have scored wins over Owens, Zayn, and Ziggler respectively for the right to be added to this match.  It is implicit that Shane is trying to stack the deck to reduce the odds of either Owens or Zayn winning the title.

The Shane/Owens/Zayn/Bryan storyline has been meandering for weeks, and the only significant development of late is that Zayn suggested he will allow Owens to pin him here for an easy title win.  Chances are it won’t go down quite like that, which could lead to a split between the duo--although if that’s the case it doesn’t seem like there’ll be any meaningful payoff to the intrigue between McMahon and Bryan.

Ziggler has returned from the baffling 2017 storyline where he stopped giving a shit, won the US title, and then walked out of the company.  It seems he’s put all that behind him and he’s back to being a babyface who whines about his untapped potential.  I would be extremely shocked if he or Corbin wins.

Cena is in this match primarily because it’s his last chance to be slotted into a top Wrestlemania title bout.  He’s already lost in the Royal Rumble and the Elimination Chamber and he’s increasingly maudlin about the whole thing.  I could dig seeing Cena win his 17th world title (breaking the record as WWE recognizes it) and facing Nakamura in the Superdome.  But it feels more likely that he’ll lose here to maximize his despair.  I’m betting Styles pins Cena to retain.

Charlotte Flair vs. Ruby Riott - Flair is defending the Smackdown women’s title.  Riott was called up from NXT back in November as the leader of a faction with Liv Morgan and Sarah Logan.  Just having two sidekicks to back her up has made her a dominant force in the division, so it was only a matter of time before she got this title shot.  Expect this match to be more about the threat of outside interference, and intrigue about whether anyone will run in to even the odds for Charlotte.

If this were some other time of year I’d expect Riott to have a good chance of winning the title, to establish a top heel to build stories around.  However, we’re less than a month away from Wrestlemania, key spots for women on that show are extremely limited, and Charlotte is a higher priority.  Personally I think Ruby is cooler, but unless the Smackdown title match at Mania turns out to be a four-way or something, I don’t expect her to be in it.

We don’t know who will challenge the champion at Wrestlemania, and we probably won’t until Asuka decides whether to challenge the Raw or Smackdown champion.  If Asuka is coming to Smackdown, Flair is the strongest opponent, but Riott would be more expendable if WWE wants to protect Flair.  Although really, the most expendable option for a defending champion is Carmella (whose Money in the Bank contract would allow her to swoop in and steal the title at a moment’s notice). 

I could very easily see Charlotte retaining in a DQ, the Riott Squad beats her down, Carmella cashes in, Carmella gloats for a few days, then Asuka shows up and Carmella realizes her plan backfired.  That all depends on a lot of things going a specific way, so it’s not a sure thing.  But it goes to show that nothing is for sure in this match.

Bobby Roode vs. Randy Orton - Roode’s United States championship is at stake.  The build to this match mostly involved a new ranking system based on who the wrestlers vote for.  Roode (who just arrived a few months ago) is well ahead of Orton (who has been winning world titles for over a decade), and Jinder Mahal has been stirring the pot by suggesting Orton is upset about that.  (Orton has argued that, hey, maybe people don’t vote for me because I beat them up and I’m kind of a dick.)

It feels like these two have nothing better to do at Wrestlemania than fight one another, so the finish here ought to lead to some kind of follow-up.  Maybe Jinder interferes to set up a three-way?  I think Roode should retain, but there’s not enough here to be sure.

Shinsuke Nakamura vs. Rusev - Nakamura already earned a world title match at Wrestlemania, so he has nothing better to do.  Rusev never has anything to do in general, so they’re going to wrestle in a battle of “whatever, I guess.”  Rusev’s got this whole “Rusev Day” joke turning him into a cult favorite, but his role here is to put Nakamura over, so I’m not expecting anything very exciting.

Jimmy Uso & Jey Uso vs. any two of Big E & Kofi Kingston & Xavier Woods - The Usos are defending the Smackdown tag team title, so only two of the New Day can wrestle in the match but they probably won’t reveal which two until just before things get started.  These teams have fought about a bazillion times, but the Usos have already run through almost every team on Smackdown so there weren’t many options left.

WWE is setting up the Bludgeon Brothers as the hot new force in the Smackdown tag division, so it’d be easy to imagine them getting a title match at Wrestlemania.  It’s mostly a question of which of these teams would join them in that spot.  A year ago the New Day would be the easy choice, but the Usos have really stepped up a level lately.  As good as both acts are, it’s hard to imagine the company will just job either of them out to the Kane Historical Reenactment Cosplay Society.

It’s become foolish to bet against the Usos, so I’ll pick ‘em to retain.

Becky Lynch & Naomi vs. Natalya & Carmella - This is another one of those women’s tag matches, where the faces act like good friends but the heels are like “you don’t want to be friends with that girl, she’s a bitch.”  I’m really sick of that shit.  If WWE were going to have Carmella use her Money in the Bank briefcase, I suspect they would have her lose a meaningless prelim match earlier in the show, just saying.

[jwgammuto]

Fantasy Booking for WrestleMania 35.

It’s time! It’s time! No it’s not Vader time, sadly. It’s time for a very special edition of One Chance In Hell, my fantasy booking for the Showcase of the Immortals. Unlike the WWE, I will apologize in advance for how brutally long this is likely to be but I’m all about consistency and I enjoy sharing my booking brilliance that will never happen with my fellow wrestling fans. Here we go!

The Women’s Battle Royal: In a true fantasy this match doesn’t exist. Not because these women don’t deserve a spot on the card, but because this is a cheap way to get everyone on the roster some face time and a pay day on the biggest show of the year. Winning it hasn’t meant anything so far and I don’t expect that to change in 2019. Since we are going to be subjected to this, I offer this solution. All 15 or so of these women start in the ring and it’s a cluster from the start. About 2-5 minutes in, a late entrant, Lacey Evans. She comes out and everyone at Met Life just assumes she’s going to cat walk around and leave without doing or saying anything. She struts about the ring, allowing a few of the women to be eliminated and looks at them with her patented disgust. Finally, when it’s down to a final elimination spot, between Asuka and whomever, she enters the ring, dumps them over the rope, and stands tall. No matter what the company plans to do following WM, whether ending brand split, draft, etc. Evans, finally, appears to be a player in a women’s division that needs a serious reboot following this Charlotte/Ronda/Becky obsessed last six months.

Andre the Giant Memorial Battle Royal: Argh. As if one of these isn’t enough but we will persevere. It appears obvious that Braun will pointlessly win this after hopefully severing the spines of Jost and Che so WWE never dares put celebrities in this event again. I have a different idea though. Since there is no rub for winning this damn thing, why not have the most entertainingly hilarious person win it and that, my friends, is Otis Dozovic. It doesn’t really matter to me how this has to happen, but logically Heavy Machinery hang in for a while and after Tucker gets eliminated, Otis rages and cleans the ring. This would probably require Braun to go out with the classic “everybody in the ring gang up” bit, but I’m ok with that. Otis carrying around that trophy and worshipping it for a couple months would be absolutely hilarious. I don’t see any other way to make this matter.

Buddy Murphy vs Tony Neiss’ abs for the Cruiserweight Title: Welcome to my first true pipe dream. This match will probably be good but not quite to the level that previous Murphy PPV matches have been because Tony Neiss. However, after Murphy disposes of Mr Abs, because he must, and an exhausted Murphy is collecting his belt, he is viciously attacked from behind by....Johnny Gargano. 205 Live lacks star power and a true test for Murphy these days outside of Cedric Alexander and that’s been done. Johnny TakeOver gives us our true first shock of the night and gives the crowd what will be a much needed energy spike for the next 6 hours to come. This of course would be predicated on Johnny losing to Cole tomorrow night. But how great would this be?

The USOs vs BlackOChet vs BulgarianKnee2Face vs Da Barrrrr for the Smackdown Tag Titles: It seems terribly likely that Ricochet and Black finally get their statement win here. I feel like it could be better. No one wants to see Da Barrrr win the titles for a seventh time and NakaRusev makes zero sense so for arguments sake, let’s say they can’t win. The end of what could be a great match will come with the USOs and BlackOChet in a melee with the other two teams distracted or down. Amidst the confusion, Black goes to hit Jimmy with Black Mass at the same Ricochet looks to do something insane from the ropes. Jimmy moves and Black destroys Ricochet, mid air, in what may end up being the spot of the night, by accident. Jey superkicks a distraught Black out of the ring and Jimmy pins an unconscious Ricochet to retain. Black and Ricochet have laid the foundation for an amazing feud built directly into Backlash. Everyone is happy.

AJ Styles vs Randy Orton: This one feels pretty easy to me and it obviously has the potential to either be an amazing match or a snooze fest of restholds. Ideally, I’d love to see some real action that ends abruptly with an RKO outta nowhere in an insane spot. Then Orton proceeds to destroy Styles further, picks up the mic, and launches into a tirade about how he is declaring war on all the “indie darlings” invading his house. Much like the legend killer bit he did early in his career, this could make him interesting for the foreseeable future.

Roman Reigns vs Drew McIntyre: Seems obvious that the guy who beat cancer gets to have a Wrestlemania moment right? Wrong. McIntyre winning is the only play here as far as I can see, particularly if the plan is to make Seth Rollins the champion later that night. Now, I’m not sure thats going to happen but let’s just assume it for now. These two guys should be able to put on a decent match with some pretty viscous hard hitting stuff. Roman hasn’t wrestled much since his return and is likely a bit rusty, even for him. This gives an opportunity for Drew to really shine here and just wear down Reigns and brutalize him while thwarting every effort to Oooaahh Up or throw ridiculous flying punches. McIntyre should be booked very strong here and should be the unquestionable winner. We won’t kid ourselves and assume Reigns isn’t going to get into this title picture sooner than later but this plants potential seeds for a big match later in the year where Roman will get his nauseating revenge.

Miz vs Shane O. Falls Count Anywhere: All signs point to Miz here. Nobody really wants to have this borderline terrible feud continue but bear with me. Shane and Miz almost never need to be in the ring for this. Have it get to outside or backstage where Shane can get his assistance in the form of Sanity. Miz, like this last week on Smackdown, manages to fight off Young, Wolfe, and Dain temporarily and as he gives chase to a shocked Shane, he meets the newest member of Sanity, Luke Harper. Harper proceeds to destroy the Miz with various objects and slamming him into everything available and then the foursome drags Miz back to the ring where they clear the Turkish announce table and hold Miz so Shane can hit the elbow from the ring and finish the job. Shane has his “corporate thug” faction, Sanity has a spot on the card, and the Miz remains our underdog babyface hero for now.

HugBoss vs The IIconics vs GlamaKitty vs Samoan SuckFest for the Women’s Tag Titles: It feels unlikely that Bayley and Banks lose here but let’s try for the hell of it. Much as I think it’s admirable that Beth Phoenix can still keep up and looks to be in great shape, I can’t see the point in her and Nattie winning the titles either. Nobody may be meaner than Taminer, but absolutely nobody wants her to be a tag champion either. This leaves us with the obvious choice and the only true tag team here. Peyton Royce and Billie Kay. The IIconics won’t lend a ton of credibility to the tag titles but have HugBoss really done that? At least if the IIconics have the titles, coming out and talking about it while avoiding defending them makes perfect sense as they are complete chicken shit heels. The best way for this match to go is to have Beth and Nia most definitely in the ring together which culminates in Phoenix having an incredible show of power over the Irresistable Force. This creates a melee outside the ring with Nattie and Taminer too, opening a window for a blind tag or some kind of confusion to give the IIconics a chance to steal a cheap roll up win from Banks or Bayley. Every time I do one of these, I’m certain I talk about Bayley and Sasha breaking up and feuding and this will not be the exception to that rule. Losing the tag titles is yet another perfect opportunity to plant seeds for Banks to go full bitch heel as she is meant to be and they can feud until what will be a fan dream matchup at SummerSlam. Meanwhile, the tag titles are.....ICONIC!

Bobby Lashley vs The Demon King for the IC championship: SSSSQQQQUUUUAAAAAASSSSSSHHHHHH! There is no other way to book this. We’ve seen it a dozen times already. Balor wins in less than 60 seconds and afterwards they both sign a contract stating that they promise to never fight ever again.

Samoa Joe vs Rey Mysterio for the US Title: Let’s assume Rey is actually too hurt to compete. It’s a shame but it plays to my advantage. Joe comes out and cuts a vicious promo about his path of destruction and how the title has never meant more to any champion. He is cut off by R-Truth’s music. Truth comes out and says he wants his title back so he can give the United States all the dance breaks they desire. As he is face to face with Joe, Cena’s music hits and he hits the ring. Truth’s facial expression will be worth the price of admission here. A triple threat for the title it is. Truth and Cena end up doing a couple of team spots with Cena’s moves of doom on Joe but he eventually finds an opening (perhaps a dance break) where he can knock Big Match John out of the ring and lock in the Coquina Clutch for the win. Joe retains but we get our overdue laugh out loud moment with Cena and Truth.

Kirk Angel vs Banker Corbin: Since I already blew the wad on Cena for the US title fun, I have a better idea here. Angle comes out first to a huge ovation and is overcome with emotion as he talks briefly to the live crowd about how honored he’s been on this retirement road by his opponents and such. Corbin’s music hits. He yaps for a few seconds disrespecting as many people as possible and then he is attacked from behind by Gable, Apollo, Mysterio, and potentially a couple others. They drag him to the ring and beat him down, hitting respective finishers before feeding him to Angle, who hits one more Angle Slam and taps out Baron for his finale in a WWE ring. Corbin gets to cry going forward that it was unfair and keeps his heat, we don’t have to watch the sadness that is Kurt in the ring still, and Angle gets to win and stand tall and proud like the legend he is on the biggest stage.

Triple H vs Batista. No Holds Barred: By the end of this we are going to wish rest holds were barred. The build up was always going to be better than the execution. Dave freakin Batista is not going to be the guy who closes the door on Triple H’s career. Let’s be honest with ourselves. This is just a way for HHH to say there was nobody he didn’t beat. I really don’t know how you can possibly make this terribly interesting unless somehow Flair gets involved and helps Trips win. Obviously WWE nor I want a 70 year old guy out there doing too much but the dirtiest player in the game doesn’t need a large window to make an impact. Eye poke, dick shot. Whatever it takes. Wooooooooooo!

Daniel Bryan vs Kofi Kingston for the WWE Title: Yeah. KofiMania. Blah blah blah. It is arguably necessary after all this build to give Kofi the title. I have made it clear I don’t think he’s a feasible long term champion. So, in the interest of going against the grain as I do, here we go. Before the match, Kofi expressly tells Woods and E that he wants to do this on his own. Kofi and Bryan put on a hell of a contest. Tons of back and forth stuff with neat falls and all. Kofi fights off the occasional interference from Recyclable Rowan as well. Eventually the outside stuff begins to mount and the New Day comes down to even the odds. While the ref is distracted by Rowan, Bryan hits the Ric Flair Memorial move on Kofi and sets up in the corner to finish him with the knee. E and Woods get up on the apron, Rowan comes over to them, and the ref takes a bump while they fight with Rowan. Meanwhile Bryan attempts to end it but Kofi springs up and hits Trouble in Paradise out of nowhere and covers the champ. The ref is out while the crowd counts to 3. Kofi gets up and comes over to the corner to get an explanation as to why his tag partners are even out there, he turns around to meet the Vegan Knee of Doom. 1-2-3. Bryan continues his reign of Green Tyranny, the seeds are planted for a long overdue New Day spilt, and Kofi can become a much more interesting character on the road to SummerSlam where he will get his rematch with Bryan and finally win.

Brrrrroooocckkk Lesnar vs Seth Rollins for the Universal Title: In the interest of keeping the title picture clear of Roman for the time being, let’s have ol Seth burn Suplex City to the ground. The problem lies with Vince’s very probable need to make Lesnar look strong for an eventual return. For that to happen Rollins probably won’t be able to win clean. Insert Reigns and Ambrose helping in various ways for Seth to climb the mountain and win the strap. Also provides those people who have a fan boner for the Shield to go full Farmer Fran from The Waterboy one last time before Dean leaves the company. Rollins must win the title for the Drew McIntyre push to make any sense and this keeps Roman a reasonable distance from the Universal Title until at least later this year.

The Queen vs The Man vs the Mayor of Armbar City to inexplicably unify the Women’s titles: This ends the show. Wrestlemania always ends with a hero getting an absurd amount of confetti dropped on them. This narrative screams Becky Lynch. Let’s assume the rumors about Ronda Rousey leaving are just that. This is an absolutely perfect opportunity to start the Four Horsewomen feud. The classic action packed contest we are all expecting will happen. Lots of back and forth between the three. Near falls and submission escapes a plenty. As things slow down a bit, Charlotte takes a nasty cheap shot from Ronda and is down on the outside, Rousey then appears to be in serious trouble with Lynch taking her to ArmBar Village, and we get a visit from an angry ex champion, Shayna Bayzler, Jessamyn Duke, and Marina Shafir. The ref is tending to Flair, who appears hurt, while Bayzler and Co decimate The Man, allowing Rousey to slap on the arm bar. Becky resists more than anyone else ever has to the devastation of ArmBar City and passes out from the pain. Rousey pins her for the 1-2-3 and her new heel faction continues to destroy Charlotte to send a message. Ronda’s heel turn feels more natural now. She has a brutal faction of likeminded bad bitches. And we don’t get another year of Becky/Charlotte mortal enemies. They now have a common enemy.

Will any of this happen? Probably not. Certainly not most of it. But it’s fun to dream right? Enjoy a big weekend for us fans, everybody! Top Guy...OUT.

[wrestlingisfake]

Survivor Series preview

Brock Lesnar vs. AJ Styles - Lesnar is the WWE universal champion, the top titleholder on Raw; Styles is the WWE world heavyweight champion, the top titleholder on Smackdown.  Neither title is at stake.  This started out with Jinder Mahal as world champion challenging Lesnar, but then Mahal lost his title to Styles and now has to watch from backstage.

The situation with Jinder almost overshadows this match, because he was WWE’s big project (to turn a total jobber into a dominant world champion and the face of their expansion into India), and now he’s not even booked for the biggest show of the fourth quarter.  The only real hook to this match when it was Brock vs. Jinder was that WWE was stubbornly determined to protect both guys over all objections, and suddenly that’s out the window.  It makes you wonder what’s going on behind the scenes, although the only story anyone has heard is that everybody just decided Styles and Lesnar would simply deliver a better performance.

I’m not really hyped to see this because I don’t expect Styles has a chance in hell of beating Lesnar, or even coming close.  All of Brock’s matches since Wrestlemania have been disappointing, and that was with the spectacle of seeing him fight guys big enough to bully him back.  Styles is barely a heavyweight, and although WWE could book a guy that small to be competitive against Brock, history suggests that they won’t.

Raw vs. Smackdown 10-man elimination tag team match - In keeping with Survivor Series tradition, the loser of each fall is eliminated and must go backstage while his partners continue without him.  The match can only end when one (or both) teams is completely eliminated.

The Raw side is:

Kurt Angle (team captain/Raw general manager)

Triple H

Finn Balor

Samoa Joe

Braun Strowman

The Smackdown side is:

Shane McMahon (team captain/Smackdown commissioner)

John Cena

Randy Orton

Shinsuke Nakamura

Bobby Roode

It’s a pretty stacked lineup, considering all the champions are booked in other matches. The Raw side has 28 world titles between them, while the Smackdown side has 35.  Several one-on-one combinations could be considered dream matches; some have already happened and been considered very good.

The main storyline heading into this has been the increasing pressure on Angle to defend Raw from Smackdown, as his boss (commissioner Stephanie McMahon) has returned to TV to chew him out.  At one point Kurt had assigned his (kayfabe) son Jason Jordan to the team, only for Stephanie’s husband Triple H to beat Jordan up and take the spot in a show of no confidence.  It’s been heavily implied that Angle will lose his spot as general manager if his team loses this match.

Last year’s version of this match lasted almost an hour, evidently to make avoid the problem of rapid eliminations making the wrestlers look unusually weak.  This year’s lineup would probably be protected at least as much, if not more.  It would be extremely weird if, say Samoa Joe got taken out after five minutes with a clothesline or something, and he’s probably the most expendable guy in the match.  So hopefully this’ll be an epic war, to pay off the hype surrounding a month of big “Raw and Smackdown brawl all over the building” angles.

I wouldn’t count on the match setting up and story beats for the future, although it’d make some sense if Jason Jordan got involved (possibly at his own side’s expense), or for something to raise tensions between Triple H and Kurt Angle.  John Cena is technically a free agent with no allegiance to either side, so that could factor in somehow.  WWE has done shockingly little with the Strowman vs. Kane feud since Strowman was crushed to death in a trash compactor, so I gotta figure Kane will run in to cause Braun’s elimination.

It’s genuinely hard to pick an outcome here, because of all the chaos that is assured.  You’d figure the team with Shane is at a serious disadvantage, but a few key disqualifications or count-outs could change that real quick.  All things being equal, if Angle is going to keep wrestling here and there to set up a Wrestlemania match, it’d make the most sense for him to have his hand raised at the end.

Roman Reigns & Seth Rollins & Dean Ambrose vs. Big E & Kofi Kingston & Xavier Woods - Roman, Seth, and Dean dominated WWE as the Shield from 2012 until their breakup in 2014.   Shortly thereafter, Kofi, Big E, and Xavier formed the New Day and quickly became the definitive trio in WWE.  Now the Shield are back on Raw, while the New Day is on Smackdown, and we’re doing a bunch of Raw/Smackdown fights.  So we get a dream match between the two biggest factions of 2010s WWE.

The match was set up by the New Day doing a distraction to cost Seth and Dean the Raw tag team title, which iced them out of the “tag champs vs. tag champs” match on this show and effectively freed them up for this.  Roman has just recently come back from some viral infection that kept him out of the planned Shield reunion last month, so this is a pretty decent make good.  It’s not the way I’d have wanted to set up this match, but I’m glad we’re getting it.

The Shield specializes in facing ad hoc trios that can’t match them in terms of teamwork and cooperation.  They’ve rarely faced a full-time trio that can truly match them at that game like the New Day.  On the other hand, the New Day specializes in two-on-two programs with the advantage of always having a third guy providing backup.  They haven’t dealt with their opponents finding reinforcements to even the odds as much as the Shield has, so a six-man tag against a well-oiled machine could give them trouble.  I’d like to see the psychology of the match demonstrate all this, but I’m not holding my breath.  I’ll settle for Dean trying to break Xavier’s trombone or something.

Since all the plans for the Shield reunion in October got shot to hell, it’d be absolutely insane for them to lose now.  That sucks because I’d prefer a scenario where either team could plausibly win, but the New Day can be as entertaining in defeat as they are in victory.

Alexa Bliss vs. Charlotte Flair - Bliss is the Raw women’s champion and Flair is the Smackdown women’s champion; neither title is on the line.  The match was originally announced as Alexa vs. Natalya until Charlotte dramatically won the Smackdown women’s title in her hometown and celebrated with her father (who is recovering from a health scare).  So Charlotte’s on a roll and she’s clearly a company favorite with friends in high places.  On the other hand, WWE has such a weird boner for Alexa so I think she’s just gonna win.

Raw vs. Smackdown 10-woman elimination tag team match - This is the second of two traditional Survivor Series matches.

The Raw side is:

Alicia Fox (team captain)

Nia Jax

Sasha Banks

Asuka

Bayley

The Smackdown side is:

Becky Lynch (team captain)

Naomi

Carmella

Tamina

Natalya

This amounts to “all the women on Raw but Mickie James and Dana Brooke” versus “all the women on Smackdown but Lana.”  (Theoretically Paige and Nikki Bella are still out there, somewhere, but I wouldn’t hold my breath waiting for them to show up here.)

Historically, women’s Survivor Series matches have suffered from being too short, too sloppy, or too dull.  However, this is probably the strongest lineup WWE has ever booked, so they could probably give us a good match.  Whether WWE will let them do a good match remains to be seen.  I suspect this is going to get 15 minutes and half the falls are going to feel rushed and pointless.

The Raw side pretty much has to win, if only to preserve the mystique of Asuka’s win streak.  (If she’s counted out here, nobody will consider it a blemish on her record, but there’s no good reason to even go there.)  You’ll notice I’m picking Raw to sweep all the matches that actually matter.

Sheamus & Cesaro vs. Jimmy Uso & Jey Uso - Shesaro are the Raw tag team champions and the Usos are the Smackdown tag team champions; neither title is at stake.  Both teams have always been good and both seem to have turned it up a little lately, so maybe that’s why they switched this from Ambrose/Rollins vs. Usos a couple of weeks ago.  Smackdown really needs something to crow about so I’m thinking this match will be one of them.  Usos win.

The Miz vs. Baron Corbin - Miz is the intercontinental champion on Raw, and Corbin is the United States champion on Smackdown.  This isn’t for either title.  Both guys suck and their only skill is cutting internet message board promos that make their opponents look shitty.  So it’s a battle of two guys who suck at everything but making each other look like they suck even more.  Hell, Dave Meltzer called this his bathroom break match.  I may go to the bathroom and take a shower just to make sure I don’t accidentally come back in time to actually see any of this.  Fuck both guys.

Enzo Amore vs. Kalisto - Amore is defending the cruiserweight championship on the pre-show, in the only title fight on the entire card.  Kalisto has already beaten Amore and dropped the title back to him, so this is the rubber match.  I’m pretty sure we’re about to be done with this feud and Amore is moving on to the next challenger, so he should make short work of Kalisto.