#have a compassionate yet strong-willed younger sibling? check.

[theinsomniacindian]

I recently finished reading Crime and Punishment and now I want to see Raskolnikov and Ivan Karamazov interact

[choices-binglebonkus]

Opinion post: best and worst LI’s from each series

I was pretty bored, decided I’d make a list of who I think are the best and worst LI’s in each series and why.  If you’ve got some time to spare, please be sure to post your opinions too, I’m rather curious as to see how the fandom thinks.

Note: Since Nathan and Paolo are antagonists/pseudo-love interests, and you CANNOT end the game in a relationship with them, I’m not going to be counting them on this list.

The Freshman/Sophomore/Junior/Senior

Best: Honestly? All of the love interests were a little bland for my tastes in this series, but if I had to pick one, it would be Becca.  She started out as a spoiled bully from a rich family and ended the series a humbler, kinder woman who learned to work for what she want, respect those around her, and she even got into the law school of her dreams.  Now that’s dedication!

Worst: Without a doubt, I think Kaitlyn Liao is the worst love interest in this series.  When the series started out, I actually thought she was great.  I didn’t want to romance her (or anyone else but I had to *eyeroll*) but she was my best friend.  But then I began to realize how detestable she was as a character.  She turned on MC after she accidentally came out to her parents, she turned on EVERYONE when she joined the Gutter Kittens, and only when her circus tent came crashing down did this sad clown emerge and ask for help cleaning up the remnants of the big top.  She’s immature, rude, she goes off on people for doing things she doesn’t want (Annisa talking to Natasha, MC writing an unbiased article about the Loose Pins and their strong performance, etc.), and worst of all, she’s a criminal.  

A LEGIT criminal.  Not on the level of the Alphas, but she’s committed her share of crimes, including underage drinking, breaking and entering on multiple accounts (when she broke into the observatory in TF book 4, investigating the studio’s security room in TJ, and breaking into the old dorm in The Senior), trespassing which basically goes hand-in-hand with the last crime, vandalism (when she broke a $500 bottle of whiskey in a bar in The Senior), and fleeing the scene of a crime (when she broke the whiskey).  The other characters have also committed some of these crimes, but I’m mainly gunning for Kaitlyn because she’s a repeat-offender, not to mention she’s committed more crimes than any of the other love interests.  Just...why did her character go totally south after book 3?!

The Crown & The Flame

Best: Raydan.  He’s loyal, incredibly strategic and knowledgeable, can hold his own in a fight, and he’s charismatic as hell.  Playing as Raydan was incredibly fun and I loved seeing what sorts of mischief he got up to on his adventures.  Plus, his romance scenes were incredible.  My favorites were the flower scene in book one and the tent scene in book two.

Worst: Shockingly, Dominic for several reasons.  He’s Kenna’s best friend and he’s held that title since their childhood, but I can only see him as her best friend.  The romance scenes between Dom and Kenna felt a little...I dunno, forced?  There’s not really any other way to say it.  I married Dom in one playthrough and I regretted it so much.  When Kenna and Dom get married, they become the most boring heterosexual couple in the game...honestly!  I also found Dominic just a very boring character in general, which is pretty shocking considering A. He’s a frickin’ fire mage and B. He’s in TC&TF, one of the best damn series in the game.  Whenever I saw the words “You are now playing as Dominic Hunter”, I wanted nothing more than to see “You are now playing as Kenna Rys” because I was so bored with his character.

Most Wanted

Best: ...I honestly don’t know! It’s been so long that I don’t even remember any love interests in the game.

Worst: Same here!

Rules of Engagement

Best: It’s a tie between Dean and Mira.  Dean was an incredibly down-to-earth character who started off as MC’s faithful companion and eventually fell in love with her.  Friendly and never afraid to lend her an ear, Dean made sure MC was faring well during tough times and took her out on dates/hangouts whenever she needed a pick-me-up even though his job as a Bartender *probably* didn’t pay that well.  During their marriage, Dean took on two roles, as not only did he agree to be her husband, he remained MC’s best friend as well.

Mira was also a really good love interest.  Even though she was paywalled to hell, she was a genuinely sweet character.  I got the wrong impression of her at first, thinking she was just a snooty chef brought to the kitchen to cause trouble for Party Girl Sister, but oh man.  Mira was fantastic.  When Party Girl Sister was in the middle of her pregnancy scare, Mira got involved and frequently checked in on her to make sure she was okay.  She helped her unwind and relax when the stress got to her, offered her advice from when she was pregnant with her son, and was overall an unexpected friend that Party Girl Sister needed.  When the time came to pick a love interest for PGS, I didn’t hesitate to pick Mira, who was truly her loving angel, and I don’t think I made the wrong choice in that at all.

Worst: I’m going to get plenty of hate from this I’m sure, but William and Leo.  They’re both incredibly rich and famous men who don’t even seem realistic, yet they fall for a completely ordinary girl.  William annoyed me on the first date when he saw my (non diamond!) outfit and had the audacity to say “Oh...” with a shocked look on his face.  I mean...”oh”? What the fuck is that supposed to mean?  But also, William was just kinda boring.  It seemed like he was using his money to compensate for how boring his personality was.

Leo is quite the opposite of William personality-wise, but I can’t say I liked his whole bad boy/rebel/”let’s do illegal stuff because in the end it’s fun” shtick.  Like William, Leo also seems largely unrealistic and rather unrelatable, which I think is a pretty big problem if you’re trying to resonate with the readers.

Endless Summer

Best: Jake and Quinn are a pretty tough choice, so I can’t say for sure which one I prefer.  They’re both attractive and both are rather different personality-wise.  Jake is brave, but at the start of the book he only really cares for himself.  As the story goes on, he starts to care about the other characters as it becomes apparent they’re all stuck on the island.  While Jake is a good guy, his nick-names got very, very old after three books.  Additionally, he’s one of the overused cynical/loner/sarcastic male love interest archetypes, but I’ll give him a pass this time because he was the first of his kind, plus he had a pretty good reason to be as cynical as he was.

Quinn is super cute and is probably one of the sweetest LI’s in the game.  She’s friendly and compassionate from the start, and knowing that she has an illness that will one day result in her death, she has become brave and willing to live her life to its fullest.  Her romance scenes were also amazing.  My personal favorite is the sex scene in the kitchen when she and MC make cupcakes together.  However, one thing I fault the writers for with Quinn’s writing is that she’s frequently portrayed as the damsel in distress.  You have to protect her from the Sabertooth, save her when she almost drowns, save her again when the Vaanti attack the hotel, save her AGAIN when she nearly dies from Rotterdam’s Syndrome, save her again when she and the group are held at gunpoint in the MASADA complex...the list goes ON!

Worst: Sean. Sean is an incredibly kindhearted character who cares about his friends to the point of not eating food until everyone else has eaten.  He’s selfless, brave, and an overall friendly guy.  However, that is his fault. I know it’s odd to be faulting such a great dude for being one of the sweetest guys in the game, but the only problem I have with him is that he’s a cookie-cutter clone of Chris, Caleb, Griffin, basically any strong, benevolent male character in the Choices series.  For the most part, they’re largely identical in personality, and that takes away from their originality.  I still love Sean.  Saying he’s the worst just means I think he’s the worst of any of the amazing LI’s in ES, but he’s still a really great guy.

#LoveHacks

Best: I really can’t pick any of them.

Worst: I’d honestly have to say all of them.  They’re either A. Wishy-washy B. Boring C. Introduced way too late in the game and their development is either non-existent or way too rushed.  Hell, I forgot Mark Collins even existed until I stumbled across his page on the wikia.

The Haunting of Braidwood Manor

Best: Eleanor by default.  She’s paywalled and you have to pay diamonds to keep her alive at the end, but she’s pretty, she’s sweet, she cares for her younger siblings enough to live(?) with a dark secret that’s left her traumatized, and we get to spend lots of time with her in the book.

Worst: Victor.  We barely even get to know this guy!  There’s almost nothing about him on the wikia pages either simply because he’s almost never in the story without diamonds and we barely even got to know him.  

The Royal Romance

Best: Even though I didn’t marry her at the end (I still had some flings with her though), Hana.  Hana is incredibly sweet, she’s really pretty, and she’s got overbearing parents which, in my case, makes her a really relatable character.  She does anything she can to please her parents/friends and she quickly becomes a very loyal friend (or lover) to MC as she finds her way as the newest noble in Cordonia.

Worst: Drake.  Oh, Drake, have I got a bone to pick with you.  Not only is he one of the many, MANY cynical/loner/sarcastic male LI archetypes, the story could have gone on without him, rendering him pretty useless.  I cannot think of a single non-romance scene where I thought: “Oh man, Drake is a really necessary character!”  Not to mention, Drake is picky as hell.  He gets to live in the palace for free, gets to eat food and hang out with Liam, but he whines about not wanting to become like those gosh darn nobles, and he whines about the food being “too fancy” or whatever when there are people starving in other parts of the world.  I would understand you not eating food if you’re allergic or can’t stomach it, but really, Drake? Because it’s too fancy?! Come on!

Hero

Best: I have to say, none of these love interests were up to par. The book is great, the LI’s are lacking.

Worst: All of them.  They’re not too bad per se, but man...they’re just so lackluster! Grayson is boring, Kenji is cocky, and Eva got on my nerves a lot.

High School Story

Best: Emma without a doubt.  She’s pretty, she’s very sweet to her friends and MC, and she’s a shy character who’s surprisingly well-written.  Though I didn’t choose to romance her, I still think she’s definitely the best love interest in this series because not only is she an amazing friend, but in other playthroughs I’ve watched, she’s a very loving girlfriend to the main character.

Worst: Probably a tie between Caleb and Maria.  Caleb, like I mentioned earlier, is pretty much the same as Chris, Sean, and Griffin, which makes him rather dull.  Maria isn’t too bad, but she could get very intense at times, and that gave me a really negative first impression of her that never truly went away.

It Lives in the Woods

Best: Andy. Frickin’. Kang.  He’s strong, rough and tumble, and really brave, but he’s also soft and gentle with the MC if they romance him.  He’s the first trans representation in Choices, and I personally think Pixelberry did a really good job with him.  I really felt for him when he and Tom were being discriminated against on the basketball team because they were both Asian, and because Andy was also short and transgender.  Yet, even after all this, Andy doesn’t quit the team and doesn’t give up his dreams, and if he survives the final game with Mr. Red/Jane, he becomes the basketball captain and eventually goes on to play for a college team.  Way to go, King Kang!

Worst: I don’t think I can really say any of them are the worst because all four of the other love interests in this series are pretty great.

Home for the Holidays

Best: None of them.  NONE.

Worst: ALL OF THEM! This book was abysmal, and one reason it was so hated is because the love interests were awful.  Nick was unnecessarily cruel, Wyatt was so happy it was creepy, and Holly was really boring.  

Red Carpet Diaries

Best: Oh dear.  Same case as HFTH, none of them.

Worst: I can’t choose just one, so...I guess all of them.  Matt was forced upon the player, Victoria is one of those mean girls/divas that has a complete 180 in her personality at some point, Teja and Seth were absolute morons for the entirety of book two, and Addison and Hunt were purely a fanservice for people who played Hollywood U (which is a good game, but if you ask me, Addi and Hunt should’ve never become LI’s for this series).

Perfect Match

Best: I really don’t even know with this one, you guys.  I was never a fan of this series (oof, I can feel the hate I’m getting from that sentence right now) and the LI’s all seemed really unimpressive.

Worst: Hayden.  While I really dislike Damien and think he’s undoubtedly the most overrated love interest in the entire game, I’ve got to say Hayden is the worst.  You get to customize their gender, appearance, and eventually their name, and while they’re a robot with sentience and human feelings, this just makes them seem LESS human.  Not to mention, they stupidly left the group on multiple occasions and went on walks alone to brood and be edgy, which eventually led to Harley infiltrating and causing our already feeble plans to fail yet again.  Lastly...Hayden is one of the love interests that repeatedly gets crammed down the player’s throat whether they like it or not.

Bloodbound

Best: Jax is a great love interest, but since he’s one of those overused cynical/loner/sarcastic archetypes, I’m going to have to say Lily is the best in this series.  She’s tragically underrated, quirky, goofy, and she’s a GAMER with GLASSES, which is totally my weak spot.  Lily is just the cutest thing, I swear.  And since I love Jax and Lily almost equally, I went NUTS when I was offered a diamond threesome scene with them.  That day was a huge win.

Worst: Even though he’s not too bad as a character, Adrian.  You don’t get to customize his name or gender, but you still get to customize his appearance, which I really don’t like in love interests because it makes them seem like interchangeable parts.  

Veil of Secrets

Best: Kate.  She’s paywalled unfortunately, and she only becomes a love interest at the very end of the book, but she’s very beautiful and sweet.  You have to spend the entire story saving her, but fortunately, she isn’t forced upon you romantically like some of the other love interests are in the game.  It’s really unfortunate that she became a love interest so late in the game.

Worst: Probably Naomi, only because she was boring.  Otherwise, she’s not too bad.

America’s Most Eligible

Best: None of them.

Worst: All of them because they’re really bland compared to some of the other love interests Pixelberry has given us.

Desire & Decorum

Best: Hamid.  He’s sweet, gentle, he’s good with kids, and he’s really attractive as well.  Overall, though, I think all the love interests in this series are pretty boring, but Hamid is slightly less boring than the others.

Worst: Sinclaire.  I originally hated his guts, but he’s not that bad to be honest.  He’s one of the cynical/loner/sarcastic male archetypes, and while not as extreme as some of the others, he’s still a part of the archetype.  He’s grown on me, I will admit, but only as a friend, nothing more.

Across the Void

Best: None of them.

Worst: All of them.  The whole book is a mess, and that trickles down to the love interests.  Minimal character development, forgettable love interests (I forgot Meridian and Titania even existed at some points in the book), Kepler freaks me out, Sol was a dick at certain points, Zekei is more of Eos’s love interest than MC’s, it’s a whole thing.  The siblings’ love interests aren’t any better.  Eos has Lyra who isn’t too bad, but damn is she boring.  He also has Deimos and Oberon who came in out of literal nowhere, same thing with Pax’s love interest, Zaniah, and she turns out to be a freaking villain that you have to pay diamonds to redeem.  Lastly, we have Holmes...who’s really annoying to me.  Sigh.

Big Sky Country

NOTE: I feel the need to tell you beforehand that I wanted to remain single for this series, but they force you into kissing someone in the last chapter whether you like it or not, so I picked the lesser of the evils.

Best: Juliette Mendoza, and I’m ONLY picking her because she’s absolutely beautiful.

Worst: Sawyer and Dallas.  Sawyer because he’s forced, Dallas because he’s yet another one of the cynical/loner/sarcastic male archetypes.  Urgh.

The Elementalists

Best: I don’t care for any of them.

Worst: Beckett, but before you murder me, it’s only because A. He redeemed himself in like one chapter which is incredibly lazy writing on Pixelberry’s part, and B. He and Griffin (who I rather like, actually) get lots of diamond scenes while love interests like Aster are getting sidelined.

High School Story: Class Act

Best: Skye, but I wouldn’t romance her simply because she’s more of a friend than anything.  She’s incredibly sweet and she’s the polar opposite of her shitty family, and having a storyline about Skye and the abuse she gets from her family would actually be really interesting.  I’d love to see her family get their comeuppance and Skye end up living a better life, because that’s what she deserves.

Worst: I legitimately could not choose who I hate more.  Rory and Ajay are both on my shit list.  Rory is one of the most forced love interests in the entire frickin’ game, and is a complete Mary Sue.  I’m not just saying that either.  Rory is attractive, talented, popular, and lots of people have crushes on them (Erin says in one of the first chapters of HSSCA book one that their last play got a good turnout because 1/3 of the audience had crushes on Rory), and is *supposedly* completely oblivious to how many people like them, which would be kiiiiinda hard to miss, especially with Natalie and Clint.  

But otherwise, Rory has almost zero personality.  They’re friendly, but most love interests have that trait.  They also have a mother with cancer and participates in a play to fund treatment for her, but that’s about as complex as Rory gets.  The worst part about them is that they’re constantly getting shoved down our throats.  The game and characters constantly imply MC has a crush on Rory whether we like it or not, and MC ceases to function during rehearsal when they realize Rory is going to ask them to homecoming.  For Pete’s sake, we join the damn play just to get closer to Rory.  And for people who don’t give a fuck about Rory, like me, that makes the book remarkably frustrating.

And we also have Ajay, who I hate about as much as Rory.  From the start, he was rude, condescending, and snarky.  But then when Rory tells everyone their mother has cancer, Ajay says “yeah man, I’ve been super harsh because I want this to go perfect, blah blah” which, to me, is a TOTAL cop out.  Even if the play didn’t go perfect, the audience would have already paid for their admission and donated beforehand.  I didn’t excuse Ajay’s dickish behavior throughout the book, especially when he never apologized for siding against MC after the whole theater cube fiasco, even when there was zero concrete evidence against them.  Annoying, rude, never apologized for making an accusation that turned out to be untrue, and...god, every time he speaks, my mind reads his words in Brainy Smurf’s annoying, nasally voice.

It Lives Beneath

Best: Tom.  What can I say except Tomoichi “Tom” Sato?  Ever since ILITW, he's been a good friend to Andy since they were toddlers, helped him throughout life with his friendship, prevented Andy from committing suicide at one point, and was friendly throughout the first book.  In this series, he's a love interest, and is one of the few love interests who isn't drawn with a super-duper fit body (thus making him a little more realistic).  And his sex scenes are wild, dude.  I mean, in a PHOTO BOOTH at a festival full of people?!

He's loyal, goofy, and he's realistic because he's awkward and flustered if MC flirts with him.  Be honest, if an attractive stranger starting forwardly flirting with you within not even a day of meeting you, wouldn't you be pretty awkward and stuttery?  Also, Tom is cute, he appears to have a friendly/romantic chemistry with MC, and all the scenes with him and MC are well-written and pleasant to read.   

Worst: Out of fear of being personally attacked again (I even got one or two death threats), I will not be going too in-depth about why Imogen is the worst love interest of this series.  All I’ll say is that, for the majority of the book, she was an extreme weak link and I feel like she redeemed herself too late.

A Courtesan of Rome

Best: Syphax.  He’s really gorgeous, and he takes the fall for MC when she sloppily murders a Roman authority.  That’s some serious selflessness, and I really admire Syphax for that, but he is a bit forced on the player in the first part of the book.

Worst: Marc Antony.  He really gives me the creeps.

The Heist: Monaco

Best: Eris.  She’s sassy, spunky, but she’s got a soft spot for MC and is actually really sweet.  She’s absolutely beautiful and I didn’t have a hard time choosing her as my love interest.  Though...if Sonia turns out to be a love interest, I might have a problem later.

Worst: Probably Fabien because, yet again (I’m sorry, okay!), he’s a cynical/loner/sarcastic male love interest archetype.  But he’s really not a bad dude, I like him.  He’s just the worst out of this bunch.

Ride or Die: A Bad Boy Romance

Best: One word: none.

Worst: All of them! They’re all criminals, and they’re not noble criminals who screw over corrupt people like MC and their crew in TH:M, they’re legit criminals who endanger other people’s lives for fun.

So, what do you guys think? Who are your best/worst LI’s for each series? Don’t hesitate to reblog and ring in with your opinions, because like I said before, I’m really curious to see how the rest of the fandom thinks.

[ohlvca-blog]

INTRODUCING,

» francisco lachowski & twenty-two & cismale.「 after checking isabella’s diary, we saw luca rosario show up many times. apparently, he is a fashion photographer that isabella called her mutual friend. she mentions that they can be compassionate yet naive, and our background check says luca has lived here one month. if we move fast, we might catch them at the photo lab. 」

waddup, peeps ?? this tiny bean goes by the name of rue ( she/her ) and i’ll be playing Soft Boy™, luca rosario. he’s pretty much a new faceclaim for me with an old character’s background. however, francisco has recently become my forever Fave, therefore i’m so excited to have the opportunity to play him !! if you would like to hmu for plots / scream about connections all day long, please give this a LIKE and i’ll come wiggling into your ims ( or discord; find me at justrue#2233 ) shortly after. under the cut, you’ll find a brief summary about luca and his life. also all my wcs are listed over HERE if you wanna check that out as well. can’t wait to start interacting !! 

+ disclaimer: very slight talks of cancer and mental health are below. read at your discretion.

LAYER ONE: THE STATS.

NAME. luca leonardo rosario. he was born out of wedlock, so he took his mother’s name at birth even though his father’s surname is polish.

ALIAS. people usually just call him by luca but sometimes luke, luki, or leo make an appearance.

TITLE. over time, he has proudly deemed himself an obsessive pizza addict, artistic nutcase, or one of the missing dead poets society members.

NAME MEANING. his true significance of his name means a bringer of light.

AGE. twenty-two years old.

GENDER IDENTITY. cis-male.

PRONOUNS. he/him.

SEXUAL ORIENTATION. predominately panromantic demisexual. it isn’t so much so that luca is completely disinterested in sex (he’s got a perfectly good libido, thank you very much), he just doesn’t find himself sexually attracted to people based on physical appearance or initial impressions. instead he finds personality, intellect, and existing emotional attachment considerably more compelling. the idea of intimacy with somebody he’s not close with rather repulses him.

CURRENT RESIDENCE. he currently lives in venice, california but he travels quite often for his job, so residency usually fluctuates depending on how long he stays there. 

BIRTHPLACE. san paulo, brazil.

NATIONALITY. brazilian.

ETHNICITY. half portuguese and german on mother side, half polish on father side.

RELIGION. he was raised roman catholic but converted to spiritual agnosticism when he was eighteen. he views that universal ethics and love are far more important than claims about any deity and trivialize the arguments supporting or rejecting such claims. to luca, it doesn’t matter which religion someone might follow, nor does it matter whether or not someone believes in God. what matters is what someone does, not what they believe. he has his parents’ full support in his switch even though the rest of his family practices catholism.

SPOKEN LANGUAGES. portuguese (fluent/main), english (fluent/2nd main), french (still learning but can understand it quite well).

EDUCATION. graduated with the bachelor of fine arts in photography and painting at the school of visual arts in nyc.

PROFESSION. he works as a full-time fashion/commercial photographer. meaning, he works with different agencies such as fashion magazines, building, modeling, landscapes, etc. he’s also usually on location and travels a lot for his career.

LAYER TWO: THE STORY.

- so this is my baby boy, luca rosario and i love him sm ?? he usually goes by luca, but on occasion people call him either luke, luki, or leo. but he doesn’t care what people call him as long as it’s kind.

- luca was born in san paulo, brazil to both loving and supportive parents named jeremi and mariana. he lived there until he was six years old when his family moved to maryland because his parents, who are both marine biologists, were relocated for work.

- his parents had him when they were both young, making his parents both twenty-two when he was born. 

- luca was also born out of wedlock, so by the time his parents decided to marry two years later, his parents had already made the decision to give him his mother’s maiden name even though his father’s last name is polish.

- growing up, he had and still does, have a great relationship with his parents. with his childhood consisting nothing more than love and devotion from his parents, luca had nothing to complain about. his parents loved him dearly, whose pure heart and open-mindedness they helped to cultivate. they encouraged luca’s belief in extraordinary things and hoped he had carried it throughout his life growing up. his parents had always made him promise to have courage and be kind to others, for—as they explained to him—kindness has power, and that they would see him through all the trials that life could offer, in life and death.

- cancer/mental illness tw: when he was thirteen, his mother had been diagnosed with cervical cancer. upon hearing the news, luca’s whole world clasped. not only was he at a pivotal stage in his life where everything was changing and becoming more stressful ( becoming a teenager, starting high school, going through puberty ), one of the most important people in his life had be claimed by the deadly disease altogether. so many thoughts and feelings were going through his mind at the time, that he ran himself physically sick and had experienced his first panic attack. he has since been medically diagnosed with panic disorder. thankfully the cells on his mother’s cervix were diagnosed at precancerous stage and the doctors were able to treat it because it developed and spread. however, that didn’t and doesn’t stop luca from being in a constantly state of panic every time his mother so much as feels pain or coughs due to irrelevant reasons. the entire year had changed him and his family for a while.

- he has brother, who is three years younger than him, named tomás. his relationship with his brother, however, is a bit estranged. as much as he loves his brother and wishes they could see eye-to-eye, sometimes they have a tendency to butt heads often. whether that might mean your typical sibling arguments or full-on blown out fights, they just can’t seem to see get along. sometimes people believe they aren’t actually related or that they’re half siblings because when his brother was born, he took their father’s last name.

- most people would describe luca as the benevolent. despite being in a world where there’s hatred and suffering, luca declares himself independent and strong-willed by remaining kind-hearted and self-loving, not allowing the bitterness surrounding his life to overtake him and morph him into someone as cruel as the world seems to be every day. he makes the most of his life by remaining optimistic of the possibilities of a brighter future. but besides that, he’s also witty and sarcastic. he is unafraid to stand up for himself when he feels he’s in the right–or at least, attempt to do so. and although he strives to contain his optimism aura, he can fall into fits of frustration and annoyance quite often.

- he’s also super quiet and shy. he loves to make friends but because of his quiet complex, he usually has trouble speaking up and making his voice heard. he tends to become flustered a lot too when he can’t express his emotions; which he has trouble doing anyway when he’s not flustered.

- luca is capable of enduing tremendous hardship. though he may not handle difficulty in the healthiest or best way, often repressing emotion, he mostly like emerges on the other side. he doesn’t know how to express his emotions in a diplomatic way, but rather fumbles it all up and starts to ramble. rarely opens up because of this.

- to put it plan and simple luca is an art ho. he even went to university for it too ( the audacity of it all smh ). luca always loved anything artistic. even when he was little, he would go around with his disposable camera and take pictures of everything and then take to paper to draw of all the things he had taken pictures of as well. 

- he’s like a hippie dippy child of the universe. no joke. no seriously, his place at home is full of sensual shit and art. it’s getting out of hand and somebody needs stop him soon.

- he strongly believes that art is an umbrella term that relates to expressing of oneself ( not just through photography and painting ) and that everyone has the freedom to express themselves however they please. because of his beliefs, he chooses to break gender roles like bread and wears whatever the fuck he wants because yolo.

-  his appearance pretty much represents his hippie dippy lifestyle with him wearing all sorts of cute hipster shit. he’s clothes are v flow-y but don’t let that fool you. he doesn’t miss the opportunity to represent his upper-middle class within his style, so he does dress to impress, let me tell you ( he’s a fashion ho too ). his hair color changes sometimes too depending on his mood but it’s generally never too eccentric.

- when he turned seventeen, luca decided he wanted to go to college after high school. so he applied to an arts school in new york and graduated at twenty-one with two degrees in photography and painting.

- for about a year after graduating, he took some time to create his own freelance business while also looking for jobs in the commercial and industrial world of photography. about a three months ago, a fashion agency, settled in california, had contacted him about loving the work he had done in his freelance business and offered him a job as their full-time photographer. of course he accepted the job and moved out to venice, california. he’s been there for a whole month and hasn’t looked back since.

- upon hearing the news of isabella souza’s murder and also being a suspect in the case, luca’s kind of been on edge since. granted, he never knew isabella all that well, considering he met her through a mutual friend of theirs about as long as he’s lived in venice and became rather decent friends because of it. but to know someone killed her, freaks him out. he never met someone who has been a victim of a homicide case before and frankly, he doesn’t know how to act since the news broke.

[soworthloving]

Rachel's Story

By Rachel Hinkle

My first breath of air was on a rainy Monday evening in April, in the room I would grow up in, surrounded only by my parents and a midwife. I was the first born of three- my two younger brothers following during the next three years. 

My existence was unplanned and my parents married three months before my birth. I remember very little from my childhood and most of the memories I have managed to retain are unpleasant. Generally, I rely on the memories of my parents and brothers to help me recall the positive times that were removed when my brain decided to block out the negative. 

Psychologists say that Depersonalization Disorder often comes after suffering many traumas, one after the other. It is also a major cause for a loss of memory from large periods of time in a person’s life. The first half of my existence was riddled with abuse physically, emotionally, and sexually from many different people I both loved and cherished. This time holds a lot of confusion for me and I often suffer knowing that it consisted of a loss of my innocence as well as any kind of real childhood.

For me, time and memories start to flood in from the age of about thirteen and forward. Strangely, this isn’t to say my life became drastically better at this age. In fact, the opposite could arguably be stated. Being a teenager is hard for the majority of people I knew. Romances form, you have to finish out school and attempt to figure out what you want to do with the rest of your life, your parents suck, you get yourself wasted on cheap liquor you convinced someone’s older sibling to buy, your body changes, and the whole world feels like it’s exploding. For me, it was more.

Of course, I went through the normal teenage drama all of my friends were going through, but my life was far from normal.  The abuse continued, a mild depression and severe anxiety began to form, a friend ended her own life three weeks before my seventeenth birthday, my father left for his mistress, my mother laid in bed for more than a year in a depressive state without working. The list continues on and on full of trials none of my friends could relate to.

During this time, we were living in severe dysfunction. The tiny trailer I was born into started growing holes in the floor, letting in wild animals during the night. The refrigerator contained only what we were able to purchase, forcing us to spend many days hungry. My youngest brother and I both picked up jobs to help with the bills my mother was not paying, and I had to push back my college start date a year to continue financially assisting my family.

As if things couldn’t become more complicated during this time, I found out four months after my high school graduation that I was pregnant and also that my brothers and mother would soon be evicted for the late lot rent that my siblings and I were unaware was due.

The next few years contained a lot of turmoil for every member of my family. My father married his mistress and moved into her house an hour from our hometown. He also suffered heart failure and had to go through a bypass surgery to save his life.

My mother continued to get behind on bills until she was picked up and taken to jail on two occasions for writing bad checks and then again for not staying up to date on her payments. She has lived in various friends’ homes for the past four years as well, while attempting to gain independence for the first time.

One of my brothers was forced to leave his school during the middle of his senior year to move in with my father after the eviction and graduated from this school away from the friends he grew up with. After graduating and working for a short time, he decided to join the Marine Corps and has now been a service member for over two years.

My youngest brother dropped out of school after the eviction and lived with a friend for many years. He developed both alcoholism and PTSD from his very painful childhood which, when combined, caused him to burn down our abandoned home.

As for myself, I had my son and left his father when he was eighteen months old. I have since been living on my own and sharing custody with his dad. I also went through a sexual assault in August which caused me to seek counseling after the depression and shame from the incident became too impossible to bear. In the strangest way, the incident became a beautiful blessing as the counseling has been helping me immensely to take hold of my life and the situations that I have faced.

Despite the negativity of life that I have faced, I remain positive and hopeful for the future. I have watched the people around me suffer through tragedy and trauma beyond comprehension yet come out of it somehow stronger than ever before- specifically my brothers whom I have the utmost respect for as they continuously attempt to better themselves. I have watched myself do the same.

The situations that I have personally faced have caused me to own my resilience. I have brought out the fiery, feminist, loving, compassionate, strong-willed, intelligent woman inside of me that had been suppressed until I found peace despite my turmoil.  

I have found the most harmony through writing down my experiences in detail. I am eager to remember the difficult parts of my life in order to grow from them and to connect with others who have gone through life facing similar demons. 

In the end, we all end up as stories, sitting in the hearts and minds of those who knew and loved us. I’m finally starting to find the value in making mine worth reading.