#happy last day of 2023! or at least for me cuz i have 10 minutes left haha

[helianskies]

chapter xxx: the summoning

“Do you want to rest for a bit?”

“Don’t you? You did before.”

“I will for a bit, maybe,” Antonio supposed. He continued to stroke through Arthur’s locks. He continued to feel nothing but love and affection for the sweet, sleepy creature before him. “But only for a bit. I should keep up appearances and join the family for food soon.”

“What, more food? Again?”

“It may surprise you to know, but it is nearly dinnertime.”

“How?”

“You know what they say: time flies, and all that,” Antonio trailed off.

[ read full update on ao3! ]

[hospitalterrorizer]

dairy26

9/30/2023 - 10/01/2023

went to a drag show tonight and worked on music a little.

the music stuff is pretty light, i started a new song and wrote some lyrics, there's still a riff i need to put into midi and that might be a whole other song, and there's another song / riff i need to fill out. but i think working these 3 new things out, there might be one more short song left to do for the project, and then i think that'd be it for songwriting, or who knows, i should just keep making short songs if/when i feel like it, and finding new ways to do it.

maybe if i write any new long songs, long meaning over 1 minute, i'll just have some stuff for a new ep, or something. i shouldn't get too hasty, album art isn't done even, and all the lyrics aren't fully written either. i should just focus on the songs i have hear and start editing through them, i guess, if i feel like the thing is too long, to get to a better length.

i think i like all the songs though, so i could, at worst, split it into 2 albums or something, if that has to be done. but i've conceived of this as one thing so far.

anyways, the drag show was fine. i saw manila luzon, i'm not super into drag race or anything really, but my gf is so she was really excited/ happy about this. on the way to the bar, there were all these weird business people out wandering around, basically, like bugs, it was really funny, i kept saying loudly how they look like they're ready to make a deal "like that tv show". they seem annoying so annoying them is justified, to me.

i think maybe this monday i will really resume doing vocals again, super excited for that actually, if i can get a couple short songs done then i can work on them through the week alongside some of the older stuff that's pretty written out. there's one song that does need a lot of work still, so that should be done, i guess.

but now i'm so sleepy and spent still from yesterday, i was falling asleep in the middle of the day today.

right now i'm listening to the cobra kai discography comp, really good hardcore / pv / emoviolence stuff, a good break from the way disso stuff usurp synapse do but not really less crazy, it's got a lot of really imaginative bits. i guess it skews a little more emo sometimes in the writing but it's got synths and stuff, i should really pull out a cheap synth for one of these new songs i'm working on, it'd be pretty easy i think cuz basically the one i've got lyrics down for only has 2 guitars, and drums so far, it's also not fully written but now that i have lyrics down i can figure out what will go where and how well that could go. i should also do something where i'm more comfortable with guitar just handling fucked up chord stuff and not really trying to write a riff really, just finding interesting movements and charting them, letting a cheap sounding squarewave synth handle other stuff, and maybe another guitar for squeal sounds. but i can just make the regular one do that.

also today i found out the tuning one of the guitarists in arab on radar used, which was aaddaa, and the high e string used a 13 gauge string and had it pretty low, so it was loose and rumbly. really crazy tuning, i'm interested in trying it (as best i can at least) and seeing what comes out of that. it's hard to do droney stuff w/ midi though. or the guitars i've made at least don't deal with it well.

anyways i really am fucking sleepy, so this entry will be short i guess.

one last funny thing i guess, my gf woke up and told me she had a nightmare where i got ffs (i don't think i'd ever do this) and said i looked like a literally different person and she didn't like me anymore.

byebye!!

[nekoannie-chan]

Regrets

Pairing: Steve Rogers X Mutant! Reader.

Word count: 1545 words.

Summary: Steve had made a decision, but another fact will make he realizes it was the wrong one, can he fix it?

Warnings: some smut references, nothing explicit, mention of deaths of characters, angst, sad.

A/N: This is my entry to the @distractedgemini‘s Kay’s Decade of Music Writing Challenge with the song prompt #35:

“Someone like you” by Adele.

And my entry to the @kitkatd7 ‘s Kits’ 250 Writing Challenge with the dialogue prompt #1:

“Don’t you understand? You were her happy ending”.

And my entry to @jtargaryen18 ‘s 30 days of Chris.

My native language is Spanish so I wanna improve my writing skills in English if you notice any mistake please let me know and I will correct it.

I don’t give any kind of permission that my fics be posted in other platforms or languages (I translate myself my work) or the use of my graphics (my dividers are included in this), I did them exclusively for my fics, please respect my work and don’t steal it. There are some people here who make dividers that anyone can use, mine is not this type, please look for the other’s people. The only exception is the ones I gifted ‘cuz now belong to someone else. If you find any of my works on a different platform and is not one of my accounts, please let me know. Reblogs and comments are always welcome.

DISCLAIMER: I don’t own Marvel’s characters (unfortunately), except for the original characters and the story.

My other media where I publish: Wattpad, Ao3, ffnet.

If you like it, please vote, comment, and give me feedback to improve my skills and reblog.

  I heard that you're settled down That you found a girl and you're married now I heard that your dreams came true Guess she gave you things, I didn't give to you

 2005

 You came into your house after returning from school, everything was supposed to have changed, the mutants no longer had to hide, and weren't taken to the Garland Detention Center.  

"I'm home," you said after closing the door.  

There was no answer, maybe they didn't hear you.  

"Mom, Dad," you called as you walked down the aisle.

It was strange to you that they didn’t say anything, you returned to the hall, maybe they left you a message there and you hadn't seen it yet, there was no note, probably something had happened, some last-minute mission, although it was rare that you hadn't been warned.  

While they weren't your biological parents; Clarice and John had adopted you after yours were killed by the Purifiers when you were a baby, although the fact that you were adopted didn't care much because you were happy with your family, even your last name was Proudstar and they love you as her daughter.

But when you entered the kitchen, a scream came out of your throat; there were their bodies, you could tell at first glance that they had tried to defend themselves, even though it was not enough.   

"No! Mom! Dad!”

You tried to move them, you were hoping they'd still be alive, even if they were badly hurt, you didn't get the idea that they were dead.   

 I heard that you're settled down That you found a girl and you're married now I heard that your dreams came true Guess she gave you things, I didn't give to you

 "There's someone here," a woman said.  

You didn't even hear when someone came into your house; for a moment you thought they were your parents’ killers who had come back or listened to you.  

“Are you Y/N? Y/N Proudstar, Clarice's, and John's daughter? The woman questioned.  

You nodded, you didn't know if to trust, you didn't even know who that woman was, within seconds a man came into the kitchen.

"When did you arrive? Fury asked you.  

"About 10 minutes ago," you replied scared.   

"You'll come with us, Coulson, accompany her to take her belongings and help her," Nick said.  

 "What? I'm not going anywhere, I don't even know who you are, how can I be sure you're not going to do me the same as my parents?”   

"We are S.H.I.E.L.D. we received your parents' message asking for help and that we take care of you.”   

“How do I know they are S.H.I.E.L.D.?”  

Your parents had told you everything, yet without proof, you couldn't believe them.

Fury and Coulson showed their IDs, they weren't lying, you sighed, you went to your bedroom followed by Coulson and you started storing things in suitcases and backpacks, they hadn't specified any item limits on you, so you'd take as much as you could.

 Old friend, why are you so shy? Ain't like you to hold back or hide from the light

I hate to turn up out of the blue, uninvited But I couldn't stay away, I couldn't fight it I had hoped you'd see my face And that you'd be reminded that for me, it isn't over

 2012

 You walked as fast as you could, that day you were late, you were carrying the report of the last mission you were gone to.   

You didn't pay attention around you, so you crashed into something hard, you thought it had been against a wall, because of the impact, you fell.  

"I'm sorry, miss, okay?” The ‘wall’ said to help you lift.   

"Captain, I'm sorry, I didn't see it," you apologized.   

Steve help you pick up the leaves, within a few seconds Coulson showed up.

"Agent Proudstar, the report," he asked.  

"I was already taking him to his office right now," you replied. 

"I see you've met, your next mission will be together," Coulson said.  

You knew who Steve was, but you remembered he didn't know who you were, you still didn't show up.  

"Agent Y/N Proudstar," you said, smiling.

 Never mind, I'll find someone like you I wish nothing but the best for you, too "Don't forget me, " I beg I remember you said "Sometimes it lasts in love, but sometimes it hurts instead" "Sometimes it lasts in love, but sometimes it hurts instead"

 2018

 "I know we've lost a lot these days, but you remember I was going to ask you something the day Bruce called us. You know when Thanos...” 

"Yes," you answered while you were accommodating some things 

Steve took your arm to stop and pay attention to him.  

"What's going on?”   

"Marry me," he asked.  

"Just like that? Are you sure? I mean, you always told me you wanted Bucky to be in...” 

"We try to get everything back to normal, Thanos is dead we can't do much, but we can try to be happy and get on with our lives, it seems like that's all we can do.”  

"I think it's going to be enough for Nat to be there," you said. 

He took your answer as if he ‘I do’ and kissed you.

 You know how the time flies Only yesterday was the time of our lives We were born and raised in a summer haze Bound by the surprise of our glory days

 2023

 You looked down, you knew Steve had told you a lie... or worse he had lied to you all that time.   

As soon as he left you started running towards the trees, you didn't want to know anything anymore, if you could... If you could... you probably would have done the same thing and prevent your parents from being killed.  

“Y/N!” Bucky called you.  

You didn't listen to him, you kept running, you wanted to go as far as you could, you'd like to somehow forget everything and Bucky finally caught you, grabbed your arm, and stopped you.

"He's gone, he went with Peggy," you started sobbing.   

Bucky hugged you, he didn't know what to say or do to comfort you, he knew what you were saying was true.   

"He left us... Bucky, he left us...”  

Yes, Steve had left them, but Bucky didn't understand exactly what you meant, you hadn't even had a chance to say anything, you didn't know now what to do, the feeling was a thousand times worse than when you lost your parents.

 I hate to turn up out of the blue, uninvited But I couldn't stay away, I couldn't fight it I had hoped you'd see my face And that you'd be reminded that for me, it isn't over

 1947

 Steve peeked into the door of the house where Peggy was living.  

He saw her pass, at least now he was sure he hadn't got the wrong house; he needed a few more minutes before knocking the door and that's when he saw Daniel kissing Peggy and after the couple split up, she took the baby from the crib.

Peggy found her right partner after Steve had ended up on the ice...   

Steve stayed a week in that time, it would probably be a month after the last time he had seen them...  

You didn't expect to be welcomed... but he would do his best to recover what he had ruined.

 Never mind, I'll find someone like you I wish nothing but the best for you, too "Don't forget me, " I begged I remember you said "Sometimes it lasts in love, but sometimes it hurts instead"

 2019

 "Orphanages are full," you said while you're taking the last picture you'd been taken with your parents.  

"Everything is complicated," Steve replied, and he was reading the newspaper.

"We should adopt some or some of those little ones, I was very happy when Clarice and John adopted me," you said looking at the picture.  

"You think they're going to let us? We’re superheroes, I don't think they want to expose children to danger," Steve replied, taking his eyes off the newspaper.   

You kept thinking for a few minutes, Steve was right, you didn't know exactly if another threat would show up, no one knew.  

"You're right.”  

"But we can do some," Steve proposed, approaching you.  

"Captain," you said seductively.

 Nothing compares, no worries or cares Regrets and mistakes, they're memories made Who would have known how bittersweet this would taste?

 2023

 Steve returned to where he belonged, took everyone by surprise, as soon as they heard the machine activate Bruce and Bucky immediately went to see what was going on, Bruce had installed it at the Compound in case it was necessary, they feared it would be some other enemy, no one expected him to return, as soon as they saw him a sepulchral silence took over the room.   

Bucky decided to take him outside, no one dared say what had happened. 

“And Y/N?” Steve asked

Steve had immediately noticed your absence, Bucky bit his lip, and he didn't know how to explain it.  

"Buck, and Y/N? I know she must be angry...” 

"She didn't make it on the last mission," he finally confessed.   

"What?”   

"Something went wrong and...”  

Steve turned around and started walking inland from the Compound.

“DON’T YOU UNDERSTAND? YOU WERE HER HAPPY ENDING…!”

Steve didn't keep listening to what his friend was saying, he went to the base and went straight into the room that you and he shared, and if he hadn't left... if it hadn't been so hollow head... you'd still be alive.  

He opened the drawer of your nightstand where you kept the photos, he wanted to see you, he saw that something flew out when he took out the album and it was frozen as soon as he saw the object.

She took the positive pregnancy test, the day he left, you seemed so nervous, so you insisted that he wasn't the one to return the Stones.  

There was only one way to get you back, this time I wouldn't ruin it, he took some things from the room and headed to where the time machine was.

 Never mind, I'll find someone like you I wish nothing but the best for you "Don't forget me, " I beg I remember you said "Sometimes it lasts in love, but sometimes it hurts instead"

 2010

 You knocked on Fury's office, you were sent to call, and you thought it was for a new mission.  

"Agent Proudstar, I'm glad you came," Nick said.  

“What do you need a Director?”   

"This is Steve Rogers, Captain America," Fury said, pointing to Steve.

"Captain, I'm Agent of S.H.I.E.L.D. Y/N Proudstar," you introduced yourself smiling.  

Your smile, Steve had missed her so much.  

He stretched out his hand to greet you and smiled, he was going to fix everything that had happened, he would love you again and no mistakes this time, and he was going to make sure you were happy together.

.

Never mind, I'll find someone like you I wish nothing but the best for you, too "Don't forget me, " I begged I remember you said "Sometimes it lasts in love, but sometimes it hurts instead" "Sometimes it lasts in love, but sometimes it hurts instead"