#happy holdiays btw!! 💚💛💜

[starshard17]

More brainrot... here we go

For @haysgrove

-----

Virgil stared at the presents under the tree. His eyes shifted to the empty plate and glass on the table.

"He accepted the offering..." Virgil muttered under his breath, his eyes narrowing into slits. He had seen the other sides set out the same offering in years before. And none of them were dead so it must have worked for them.

"Hey Tickle Me Emo- WHOA!" Remus yelled, jumping back as Virgil swatted at him.

"REMUS HE WAS HERE LAST NIGHT!" Virgil shouted, gripping Remus' shirt and shaking him back and forth.

"Woah woah, okay calm down! What if he's not real? I mean we saw Janus dressed as Santa Claus. And if he was here he would've gotten caught in one of the many traps I set up. So unless he's some sort of sneaky little bitch, or he's not real, he's in our house right now." Remus explained, shrugging. Virgil went pale. Paler than usual.

"THERE COULD BE A FREAKY MAN IN OUR HOUSE?!" Virgil screamed. Remus snorted.

"There's already one." Remus said, pointing to himself. "Now there could be two."

Virgil looked as if he could burst into tears. He slipped down to the floor, gripping Remus' clothes the whole way down. Remus shook his head.

"Come on. Let's go find Santa. And while we're at it we'll find Janus too!" Remus cheered, leaning down and carefully lifting Virgil up from the floor. He held the emo like a little cat and started his trek around the house to see if a mysterious man set off any of his traps.

---

"REMUS? VIRGIL? BOYS?!" Janus yelled from the basement, trying to reach up to untie the rope that had grabbed his foot. He had managed to step over it while setting out the presents but as he was moving to grab the last few he had forgotten all about it. And it had caught his foot. And he'd been dangling upside down for a good six hours. He was feeling nauseous and he'd been yelling all night in hope that one of them would hear him. He waited and waited and no one came to his rescue.

That was until he heard footsteps traversing down the stairs.

"Boys!!" Janus yelled, hoping that was who was walking down the stairs.

"Oh my god Janus!" Virgil exclaimed, scrambling out of Remus' arms and running over to him.

"What are you doing in my Santa trap?" Remus asked, untying the rope, causing him to fall and hit his head on the basement floor.

"Ouch! I uh... Santa Trap?" Janus asked, rubbing his head. Remus nodded as he watched Virgil kneel beside their parental figure.

"Yeah. Didn't want Virge freaking out if an old man broke into our house so I set up things around the house to keep him away from us." Remus said. "How'd you get stuck in one?"

"Merry Christmas..." Janus grumbled, standing himself up and moving over to the last two presents waiting in the basement. He brought them over to Remus and Virgil and watched as their faces twisted in confusion.

"This paper looks just like the wrapping on the ones upstairs." Virgil mumbled. He took the box and looked at Janus' face.

"Well no kidding. I put the presents there." Janus said, crossing his arms. "Even wrapped them myself.

"You. YOU'RE SANTA AREN'T YOU! THAT'S WHY YOU WERE IN THE TRAP!" Remus yelled, summoning his morningstar.

"To a certain extent." Janus said, raising a hand in defense. "I Thought it was fun to watch you boys scramble and yell about why you hate Santa so much but after hanging upside down for six whole hours I think I'd prefer that you know that Santa Claus is in fact, not real. No more traps, no more worrying. Please just go open your goddamm presents." Janus groaned, moving up to the living room.

Remus and Virgil looked at each other then up at the stairs.

"Santa's not real. No one broke into our house." Virgil mumbled. "Thank God!" The emo exclaimed, running up the stairs. Remus followed close behind him.

As they got to the top of the stairs they looked and saw Janus sitting on the couch, rubbing his head.

"Sorry for getting you stuck in my trap." Remus mumbled, sitting on the floor beside him and resting his head on Janus' knee. Virgil sat beside Remus, leaning onto Janus' other knee.

"Sorry for being so paranoid." Virgil muttered, looking up at Janus.

"Oh boys. Don't apologize. Just never ever set up traps to catch a fictional man ever again. Please." Janus spoke, setting his hands on their heads.

"Now how about you open those presents that I got for you. It was a lot of work to get them set under that tree. Much more work than it needed to be." Janus grumbled, ruffling his boys hair. They both smiled and nodded, moving up onto the couch and hugging Janus tightly before they moved over to the tree.

"Merry Christmas you two." Janus said with a smile.