#hahaha... you foole!!! this post was about item asylum all along!!! get item asylummed idiot

[azzydoesstuff]

video game / dnd item idea: a magical top hat that when you stick your hand in it, you'll pull out a completely random item to "aid you" in battle. and when i say "completely random item", i don't mean a random item form the game, i mean a COMPLETELY random item. for all you know, when you stick your hand in there, you could pull out:

a stick

a massive katana

a nokia phone

a stick, with a lawnmower on it

a comically large spoon

an MP5 rifle

a nuclear bomb

a staff that launches anyone it hits 5 kilometers into the air

a stick, with a nuclear bomb on it

a frog on a leash

a comically large fork

a cat

a sniper rifle so absolutely massive it wouldn't even be worth it to try and use it

a grenade

a granola bar

an apple

a gravity-defying pineapple

a large battle hammer

a comically large knife

a tiny little bouncy ball

a taser

a shotgun that shoots airpods

a mace made out of rotting flesh with a gaping hungry maw on the front which can devour the corpses of your enemies, adding to the mass of the weapon and enhancing its power

a small white dove

a lamp

an anvil and a propane tank

a water bottle

a biscuit that's really really dry

an energy drink

a suitcase

literally fucking spy from tf2

ANOTHER FUCKING MAGICAL TOP HAT THAT PULLS OUT RANDOM ITEMS