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gyeommark · 6 years ago

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vagary . i

Chanyeol x Reader Genre: Angst. Fluff. Smut in future parts. Words: 4k A/N: New story alert. First chapters are always shorter to get the plot moving. Didn’t proof read, as usual: I apologize for any mistakes:( Hope you enjoy!

“Vagary (n.) An unpredictable instance, a wandering journey; a whimsical, wild or unusual idea, desire or action.”

Love hurts. They say. But pain is a choice.You chose to love and you also chose to hurt. You could’ve stopped at anytime, if you so desired; to not go through the torture, but you decided against it because going against the flow was rooted within you. You decided to endure the pain because you decided to love him for as long as possible, even when you knew it was doomed since before it even started. Chanyeol lured you in into his world. Chanyeol was your salvation and your ruin, altogether.

You could’ve used a heads up. That he would be the one to build you up so high only to make you lose consciousness on your way down. But no one did, of course, no one helped you unless it was too late to back out and you didn’t want to back out.

You didn’t plan to meet him and you were sure he didn’t plan it either, but somehow, you found yourselves in the other’s life.

The thing about being an artist –or an aspiring one, for the matter– was that you were either too crazy or too dumb. In your case, it was probably the two combined. What an awful mixture. But life was excited when you didn’t pay attention, when you went with the flow and let yourself go.

You could’ve used a heads up, that letting yourself go this much was probably going to get messy, then again, when did you ever hear what people had to say? When did you ever take people’s opinions into account?

Rarely. No, scratch that, you never did. But that was a good thing, right? To do whatever the hell made you happy?

Well, you still could’ve used a hint of a warning. Maybe, if it had existed, it would’ve remained hidden in the back of your head but no one did and you couldn’t blame them. No one really knew this would happen. There was no one to blame but yourself, and him, of course.

It was the two of you.

The moment everything started to go downhill was just another day in the office for you, not that you knew in advance, that it was going to be the beginning of a whirlwind taking over your life.

A full blown-out storm and you stood in the eye of the hurricane. The hurricane had his name.

You groaned, hearing how the alarm blasted all around your room. The light coming through the blinds was too bright and you wanted to throw something at it to make it stop… Not that it would help in the slightest, of course.

With more laziness than difficulty, you sat at the edge of your bed, stretching out every muscle that had been cramped up by you staying in bed for longer than usual. Baekhyun would definitely yell at you for being tardy again. Not that his scolding had that much of an effect in you.

Who said studying and working night shifts was an easy thing to do? Literally no one, no one ever dared saying that but you wanted to convince yourself that it wasn’t all that soul consuming.

“How many days on a row can you be late for me to start worrying about your sleeping habits?” Baekhyun half laughed, half complained, offering you a sip of his coffee, which you declined with a scrunched up nose. No caffeine with an empty stomach, you had learned that the hard way.

“It’s not a big deal, no one is ever on time, anyways”. You disregarded his comment as you started walking down the street next to him, earning a huff from your friend.

This routine you two had was something you were really grateful for. Baekhyun made it less miserable around here, especially when you had to drag yourself out of bed everyday after going to sleep at four in the morning and had to endure most of your day with people who thought they were better than you at literally everything, for all you knew, they could even consider themselves better a breathing.

You weren’t fond of people at the Academy but Baekhyun was okay, he made it more than bearable to be there, setting aside the fact that you were trying to make a living out of the Arts, which was a pretty difficult task but you wouldn’t give up.

Giving up was for the weak and yeah, you might be weak at times, but you were too stubborn to admit that.

“Just a quick question though, how many times do I have to visit you at your job until you start giving me free drinks? You know, on the house because of being your best friend?” Baekhyun raised his eyebrows at you, a glimmer in his eyes, the glimmer that appeared every time he wanted to persuade you –or anyone, really– to do what he wanted.

“When you start paying for my rent, food, overall living expenses and the tuition, perhaps?” You smiled at him as you opened the heavy glass door.

“Buzzkill”. He scoffed, trailing closely behind you.

Days went by quicker and smoother when you shared lessons together. Baekhyun was like a painkiller in the form of a human being, an ibuprofen of sorts. You had always been quite bad with analogies but he was the remedy to your questionable mood, mostly in the mornings, and that’s why he was your best friend.

If you could’ve predicted that he had gotten you involved in the situation with him, though, you probably would’ve punched him or kicked him in the groin, at least. But it wasn’t his fault, either.

No one was aware, really. That should’ve been a red flag, right there; the fact that everything was well kept under the covers, so smoothly, so perfectly. You should’ve seen it coming, but you were blind.

The clinking of the glasses and the loud music, the bass making every single thing in the room to bounce rhythmically, everything was all too familiar for you now. You didn’t love it but you had grown used to it by now. Like that mosquito that keeps buzzing around your head late at night, it’s annoying but at one point it just became background noise. You either ignored it or went to sleep with it flying around.

Your job was the mosquito you couldn’t kill, of course. Not that you could kill an entire bar, it would be senseless.

The dim lightning and the dense air didn’t affect you anymore. The sweaty bodies, people slurring senseless words, none of that grossed you out anymore; you had learned to find the amusement on it all; you also had learned how to deal with unpleasant situations, hence the small pepper spray that you always carried around in either your back pocket or tucked somewhere in your bra.

You used to carry around a Taser until your boss scolded you for it and threatened to fire you if you continued to bring the ‘demonic device’, as he had called it, to work, because, according to him, it gave off the wrong image.

You had huffed as his statement that night. Of course he was against it, he had never been in your position; he had never been in a woman’s shoes before; he had never been harassed by some drunken, annoyingly persistent male until there was no choice but to scape or call the police. He had never been bothered by that and it showed.

But you caved because you couldn’t afford to be fired, because your parents were right when they told you you couldn’t make a living out of singing and painting, alone. You’d been too rebellious and immovable to listen to them before and now you still were too rebellious as to admit that they had been right all along.

“C’mon, what is a beautiful lade like you doing sitting here all by herself? I’d love to keep you company”. You heard a man’s slurry voice say from somewhere to your right, as you rested with your elbows over the counter.

You had to physically hold back the urge to vomit. You kept an eye on said man with your peripheral, clenching your fists a bit tighter every time he leaned in closer to a woman that was clearly too uncomfortable and who tried to decline him all-too-subtly for her own good.

You could tell she was new to this whole bar life. Too young to be on her own, unfortunately.

The man leaned in to the woman’s ear and you groaned with greeted teeth, standing up straight and trying to focus your contained rage to steady your voice and not blabber on your attempt to scare him off. Not that you looked that scary on the outside, you had to compensate with words and a strong stance, instead.

“Let me enforce my right to butt in into this situation. Lay off of her bud, unless you want me to knock you out”. You said, voice calm yet fists clenched tightly.

The disheveled man looked you up and down, sending shivers of disgust down your spine. You hated specimens like him.

“I have enough attention to give to the two of you, no need to be jealous, dear”. He laughed, almost choking on his own spit in the process. Gross, of course.

“Not really something I’d like. Now leave or I’ll make you leave”. You crooked an eyebrow at him, instinctively reaching for your pepper spray. It wasn’t legal of you to use it on him, of course, but at least it’d scare him off.

“And who are you to tell me what to do, huh? I paid to be here, drinking what you serve me, miss”. And not only was he a gross, harassing one but one with arrogance to share. Just great, just the way you liked them.

“Someone with enough authority in this place to not only get you kicked out but banned forever, now scatter, creep”. The man’s face hardened, letting the arm he had around the poor female fall to his side, tensing his jaw in an attempt to intimidate you.

The only effect he had on you was to be even more nauseous, though.

“You heard her. Get out”. An unexpected deep voice said from somewhere behind the scruffy man.

Your backup of sorts stood tall behind him, wearing a rather tight black t-shirt, arms sporting a couple tattoos, that popped-up even more when he crossed his arms over his chest, his shaggy dark hair covering half his forehead. You smirked.

The man, clearly threatened by the much taller individual, muttered something under his breath before trying to compose himself as he walked away, probably cursing you off. It happened more than you’d like.

The woman smiled at you and thanked you before standing up and disappearing in the crowd of people. You hoped she had gone off to find her friends; you wouldn’t like her to be alone anymore.

Quite the protector you were, looking out for women when no one really asked you to. You did it, not because it was your job, but because you knew how sick and disgusting it felt.

The tall man sat on the stool the woman had emptied just seconds before, resting his elbows on the counter as his eyes were glued to your face.

“What can I get you?” You asked him with raised eyebrows and a small smile once you had lost sight of the girl.

“Rum and coke?” He replied with the same deep voice. You shivered but nodded nonetheless and gave him his order right after, to which he nodded in gratitude.

“Must be interesting… To witness things like these every day. Isn’t it a bit too much to handle?” He asked after taking a few sips of his own drink and after you were done preparing a couple other drinks. You huffed.

“I don’t really work everyday, thank God, but yes… Anyhow, drunken men aren’t that difficult to decipher once you’ve been around them long enough. Their masculinity gets really shaky when a woman calls them out and threatens them”.

He laughed at your comment, even when the music was too loud for anyone to hear, you could tell he had quite the harmonious laugh, the kind that would make anyone fall to their knees and surrender, you could tell by the wrinkles that formed under his eyes.

“Psychology major?” He asked once you were back in front of him after washing a couple glasses. You scoffed.

“Not quite. Arts, actually”. You replied with a pursed smile. His lips formed a perfect round shape. You smiled and looked down at your feet as you shifted your weight onto the other leg. “Wouldn’t be working here if I was a psychology major, would I?” You cackled, it was sour, to admit your hardships –sort of– to a complete stranger.

It was okay, you were pretty sure you wouldn’t see him again.

“Touché”. He laughed again, igniting the sweat in the palms of your hands to run like an open faucet. You connected the reaction to the fact that it was pretty rare to find someone who you could have a decent conversation at a place like this, that was it. You hoped that was it but at the same time, you didn’t want it to be it.

“Then, I guess we’re just optimistic artist, hoping we can make it big while doing something we love”. Your stomach flipped, maybe it was just the remainders of the nausea being washed away by this man’s presence. Maybe that was it or maybe it was the enthusiastic idea that you had found someone who understood you, someone else other than Baekhyun.

“I guess so”. You smiled back at him but your smile dropped when he stood up and handed you a twenty-dollar bill. You hoped he didn’t notice and hoped he wouldn’t label you as the bartender who grew attached to him in the span of twenty minutes.

“I’ll see you around, then”. You wanted to ignore the numbness that appeared when your fingers touched, you wanted to ignore the reaction your body was having to this complete stranger that had, somehow, made your night way better than you had expected.

You just smiled at him, too scared to do or say anything else. Too anxious to give off the wrong impression. You were supposed to act cool and detached towards the customers, you were supposed to not let yourself feel instinctively attracted to any of them, yet there you were; following his figure through the crowd until he disappeared through the front door.

“Correct me if I’m wrong but I’ve heard you and my boy Chanyeol met?” Baekhyun spit out, one week after the ominous night. You had tried your best not to dwell on the memories of that day, tried to forget the stranger that had turned your boring, mundane night onto quite the memorable one, indeed.

You weren’t sure of the man’s name, you hadn’t asked and he didn’t mention but a part of you knew this mysterious, fallen from the heavens above, man was the same Chanyeol guy Baekhyun was talking about.

“Who?” You asked, baffled. The name didn’t ring any bells inside your head but Baekhyun’s raised eyebrow led you to believe it was a name you should be familiar with. You didn’t want him to be right but at the same time you did. How small could the world truly be?

“Chanyeol? Park Chanyeol? Tall dude, shaggy hair, a couple tattoos? Wears glasses to seem smart although he doesn’t really need them? Has quite the loose mouth and can be rather charming?” Baekhyun insisted, throwing his hoodie over his head as you walked side by side after your lessons were done for the day. The sun was setting behind you as the dwell inside your mind kept increasing its pace.

You pursed your lips, trying to confirm if the same someone you were thinking of would be the one who would fit that description. You were sure, yet you didn’t want to be. Your mind wandered off –once again– to that man from the other night, he who was trying to make conversation out of a rather unpleasant event. Dashing smile. You trembled. The world truly was a confined space.

“Guy that goes out to drink on a Tuesday night without putting any effort onto his outfit?” You snickered at your own comment, trying really hard to sound indifferent.

“That’s the one”. Baekhyun cackled, making you snort at his overreaction. “He mentioned he had met a, and I quote, ‘rather interesting, endearing young female bartender’. Could that possibly be you?” Baekhyun raised his eyebrows at you as you continued walking down the street to where you lived.

“Does your friend really talk like an old man?” You rolled your eyes, trying to hide the blush that was threatening to appear on both your cheeks and ears.

“Sometimes he can be a little… Over the top, when something or someone catches his eye… He’s a nice guy, you two would get along, I’m sure”. Baekhyun smiled at you as he followed you inside, ready to devour a packet of instant ramen, like he did almost every single day.

“Yeah, well…Truly nice guys don’t really exist”. You clicked your tongue as you unlocked the door to your small, humble abode.

“Hey!” Baekhyun half yelled, smacking your shoulder as you entered your apartment, kicked off your shoes and hung your bags on the hanger that was messily placed next to the front door. “I’m right here!” His voice was rising a couple octaves, making you laugh even harder.

“I said what I said, Byun”. You cackled, jogging to leave your offended friend behind as you started to prepare your obviously unhealthy dinner.

“Whatever, just don’t come at me with your tail between your legs when you realize you have fallen in love with him”. You scoffed. Baekhyun truly was optimistic.

You should’ve listened to Baekhyun’s half empty words at the time, of course, but you didn’t because you didn’t think they would be relevant. How wrong you were, of course. Was it humanly possible to have such a lack of common sense?

Yet another night came by and Baekhyun was sitting in front of you, blabbering about how this unimportant girl from the Academy always shut him down when he asked her out. Poor little thing, you thought, but you were glad. Baekhyun was too good for anyone there, anyways.

In the midst of Baekhyun’s sulking you saw him coming in again, walking as if the world was beneath him yet, at the same time, he was too timid to make eye contact with the people around him. He was a riddle and you didn’t want to get involved, yet, simultaneously, you felt yourself being pulled in his direction, the only things keeping you from doing so were the counter between you and the public and Baekhyun, of course, whose cheeks were starting to gain that rosy tint.

A friend, you kept repeating to yourself, he could be a friend. Baekhyun was a decent guy with decent judgment; his friends shouldn’t be bad either. But it was something about him. Just seeing him made you suppress a smile. You turned around in your heels as quick as you could without getting whiplash, trying to make it seem like you weren’t just staring, trying to seem distracted with the half empty bottles of liquor that laid under the counter.

You counted ten Mississippi’s, hoping he’d be gone, or that his attention had gone straight to Baekhyun. Maybe he had walked pass the bar and hadn’t noticed you staring, maybe he had dragged Baekhyun to get some fresh air. You hoped he had but at the same time you wanted to talk to him again. He seemed interesting enough.

“For how long can a bartender crouch behind the bar before the client gets exasperated and jumps over there?” You almost choked at the sound of his voice. You thought your encounter with him on the other night had meant nothing, you thought it would be just another passerby memory inside your head, but it was as if your mind had unwillingly memorized the sound of his voice; goosebumps erupting all over your skin when you heard it once more.

You shook your head and forced down a gulp before standing back up and eyeing him with a crooked eyebrow, trying to ignore Baekhyun smiling at you with squinted eyes.

“Until said annoying client points out the bartender’s whereabouts”. You replied, pursing your lips onto a smirk. You didn’t want to smile at him, especially with Baekhyun there to witness everything, yet you couldn’t help yourself. “Has no one ever told you it’s rude to interrupt someone’s alone time?” You asked, teasingly as you poured him a glass of rum and coke, not bothering to ask what he wanted.

Was it too obvious? To memorize his previous drink? You groaned, hopefully he wouldn’t notice, hopefully he wouldn’t think you were being creepy.

He chuckled and you noticed, even when the flashing lights were going off behind him, that there was a dimple making its appearance on his cheek. What a contradiction of a human being, you thought, to seem so tough yet sweet and innocent at the same time.

“Has anyone ever told you you’re fun to talk to?” You huffed, looking down at his calloused hands as the grabbed the glass in front of him and twirled the liquid in a careless manner.

“You’d be surprised”. You rolled your eyes before proceeding to prepare a line of shots for the group of women that were, most likely, celebrating a bachelorette party. You could feel Chanyeol’s eyes on you and it made you nervous, something you tried really hard to ignore as you attempted to finish off the pink-toned shots.

“I’m all for surprises”. Chanyeol commented after one waiter took the tray full of shots from your hands. His smile was enticing, like a gravitational force pulling you to him. You wanted to run away but at the same time you didn’t. Your mind was divided, you knew it was probably a bad idea but you couldn’t help the desire to explore the possibilities that came with Chanyeol.

“I’m still here, you know? Hello, Chanyeol, how are you? Have you met my friend yet?” Baekhyun basically barked, interrupting the eye contact you had going on with Chanyeol, hoping the pink neon lights that illuminated the bar would disguise the blush you could clearly feel all over your face.

Chanyeol laughed along with Baekhyun for quite some time after you had been ‘introduced’, as Baekhyun wanted to take credit for that, saying that it was nice to have friends in common now.

You watched from the sidelines, seeing how happy they were around the other, trying to ignore the flips your stomach was doing whenever Chanyeol laughed way too hard and tried to find your eyes across the bar.

A bad idea, yet it felt like waves of intoxicating possibilities. Funnily enough, to think of him as intoxicating when you had met at a bar, of all places.

This is how it started. You wished you would’ve been smarter; you wished you could’ve seen it coming; that loving him was going to be a tragedy. But your vision was too clouded with excitement and your heart was pounding so hard it muted every single hint of sound and movement around you.

It was him. This unforeseen effect, these reactions that your body had never really had before. Everything was because of him, because of his mere presence. An electric current flowing through your bloodstream. It was him.

It was Park Chanyeol. Although at first you didn’t know his name, at first he was just some strangely good-looking man you happened to lay your eyes upon. At first he was just some guy that granted you a smile from across the room, inducing angry electric shocks to originate at the pit of your stomach. It was chemistry, that’s what people said. The perfect reaction and balance between two people that at first didn’t know it but they complemented each other in both the good and bad.

There was a connection before an introduction, the most dangerous of all beginnings. The unpredictable yet thrilling. The expectation that someone like him could be a part of your life, that someone like him would resuscitate the parts of yourself you thought were long gone.

The desire that he could feel even an ounce of what you were feeling.

A rush, an exciting journey. Chanyeol was a mystery you wanted to unravel and you hoped he would be on board.

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gyeommark · 6 years ago

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inflection point . epilogue

Chanyeol x Reader x Sehun Fake Relationsip!AU, University!AU 9.8k words

Warnings: Just angst, really. Maybe a bit of strong language, you know the drill

A/N: So this is the epilogue. A bit of a look onto the character’s future, inspired a little bit by pcychedelic’s ‘All We’ve Got is Tonight’ . A hint of angst as usual, lots of flashbacks that are written in italics. Could be read as a One-Shot, I believe, but it would be quite a messy one, ANYHOW... Thank you for reading and pls, ignore my typos and everything 😗

It was something about this place. It always felt like it was either the best or the worst decision you had ever made. You were constantly torn between leaving and never coming back or staying rooted in place and embracing the city that took you in and sheltered you.

It was a twisted situation.

You felt this way when you first started college and throughout your years as a student, things never really changed. Yes, sometimes you felt more inclined towards one side of the scale but you never stepped down from it.

It was either yes or no, black and white, there was no in between. The feeling always lingered in the back of your head even if you tried to ignore the pounding coming from somewhere in your nape.

Mostly, it was happiness. After everything had settled onto its rightful place –sort of–, you had found yourself falling into quite the happy life. Cloud 9, almost.

Almost was the key word.

That was the thing about being in a relationship with someone who was more than just your lover; he was your best friend and, somehow, he also managed to play the part of your annoying therapist that kept you level-headed when you started to lose yourself in either anxiety or excitement.

The bad moments, even when still present, of course, weren’t enough as to eclipse the good ones and you jumped to label yourself as the dumb, oblivious one without anyone having to force you to, or on the other hand, labeling you themselves.

It was obvious, how much of a good fit Sehun was to you. You had been too dumb and distracted with someone else to notice it at first, but he was good. Too good, sometimes. As if you two were cut by the same knife, but not quite.

It was scary at times, but you tried not to dwell on your similarities and just enjoyed them whenever you could and also used them to your own advantage if needed be.

Sehun wasn’t your other half and you weren’t his’, either. You were two wholes that complimented each other perfectly fine. Sometimes, you thought, if it weren’t for the fact that he didn’t have boobs, you could’ve sworn he could easily pass as yourself. An even prettier version of you and you were okay with that, honestly.

He knew you all too well for anyone’s good. He had a key to both your heart and mind, to come in and out whenever he so desired. Even if annoying, you welcomed him with open arms and a warm cup of tea –something you would never, in a thousand years, tell him about–.

Sehun was cocky enough as it was. He didn’t need yet another invitation to flaunt the fact that he knew you better than you knew yourself. And that worked for you because you also knew him quite well, much to his dismay.

It was like seeing your reflection on someone else’s body and learning to love yourself because of that. Because you loved him, you had learned to love yourself, little by little.

But love, you had learned, whether it was self-love or towards another person, had an expiration date, unfortunately. Much like everything, it seemed to only last for a set period of time before it went bad or, in your case –as much as it pained to admit it– disappeared.

You hadn’t figured out the pattern yet, of how long love could last before fading away or morphing into something unhealthy, but you knew it did, eventually, and even when you looked back on it, your heart still hurt.

So, being here was the definition, the pictorial description of bittersweet.

Coming back wasn’t a mistake but it was the scariest thing you had to face. Second scariest, actually. The first one was leaving, five years ago. You scoffed. Of course it had to be that way, you thought.

You left with a broken heart and you considered –hoped, as a matter of fact– that maybe, next time you’d be here things would’ve changed… Maybe you would’ve healed completely, forget about everything and start anew but alas, things didn’t change all that much; not at all, indeed. Your heart still pounded with difficulty; it was still broken. Weak repairs that time had done on it came undone by the mere sight of the city that built you up to who you were today.

And, still, in its trembling state, your heart still loved him. The remainders of your heart still shook in place because of him and you still had his name engraved on every centimeter of your body. Tattooed onto your skin with invisible ink, ink only you and him knew was there. Ink produced by the love and partnership you two had shared and built over the years.

Oh Sehun taught you both love and with love came disgrace, unfortunately. You prayed, to whoever was listening at the time, that it wasn’t the case, but you knew, in the end, it would be.

The end. That’s it. Everything has an end and you knew that, you just didn’t want to accept it. Not when it involved Sehun, at least.

You sighed, pulling your oversized blazer tighter over your body before crossing your arms over your chest. Your eyes scanned the constantly moving band with a hint of desperation as you bit your lip, trying to remain calm; trying to ignore the hoards of frantic people running around, some of them pushing you away to get a hold of their luggage.

It had been years and life still hated you. It hated you because it had given you no option but to love him, in spite of everything. Even if it was as a lover, as a best friend, as someone who broke your heart… As someone whose heart you broke, as well, most likely. You laughed dryly to yourself. Life was a bitch, that’s something you already had learned all too well and this was your punishment for trying to fight back.

As soon as you had gotten off the plane and breathed in the air of the city that had been home to you for so many years; as soon as you set foot on its ground, it had been as if the years gone by had never existed at all. You were still hopelessly in love and your heart still ached because of it and life was mocking you, laughing at you for caring, pointing fingers at you for being so naïve as to believe you’d ever get what you wanted, for good, at least.

The vibration of your cellphone from inside your pocket interrupted your lame sorrowful thoughts, pulling you back down to reality in a rather harsh way. It was the way things worked in your life, you had come to realize; if they happened too subtly then they didn’t happen at all. You had to be pushed and pulled with brute force because you were too blind to notice little hints and too stubborn to accept them even when they were too obvious but inconvenient. They had to hurt and drive you crazy and you were aware it wasn’t healthy of you, but that’s the way it was and you were trying hard to change it.

At least, that’s what you told yourself everyday. You were trying, you really were.

“Hello, stranger”. His groggy voice warmly said through the speaker. A corner of your mouth shot upwards in reflex. “What a better way to wake up than to hear your voice. You already here?”

Of course you smiled, you couldn’t help yourself. He still had that effect on you because he was still him. And you were still you and you both still had a piece of the other’s heart, regardless of the circumstance.

“If you’re barely waking up at noon then you have some unresolved problems going on. Especially for a twenty-eight year old man who has a job, Chanyeol”. You heard him groan yet laugh, a weird mixture of sounds and emotions. You were being annoying yet he couldn’t help but snicker at your words. “Yes, Chanyeol. I’m waiting for my luggage so hurry up because I’m really hungry”.

“On my way, ma’am”. Chanyeol chuckled before the line went dead.

This was just one example of how twisted your relationship had gotten over the years and, honestly, it was most definitely on the mellow side of examples.

If it was already twisted eight years ago, now it was an indecipherable mess. No one would dare try to solve it, not even you two. Yet, somehow, it had become your safety net and when everything had crumbled down, Chanyeol was the only one person that came to mind when you thought of someone who could possibly help you heal.

You felt split in two and you were scared. Scared because you were feeling this was a bad omen. You had had the feeling for weeks but you were in too deep into denial… But this, right now, not having even an ounce of emotion was the final straw.

You had to accept it and you had to do it now.

A goodbye.

It was as if your body knew before you, that the end was nearing. That it was unavoidable. That the flame had died down enough as to question its liability.

That you had to let Sehun go.

Your body had the hunch for weeks and you were too dumb to acknowledge it. Maybe you should’ve paid attention to the fact that most of the time you weren’t feeling anything, at all. No frustration when you were late, no anger because someone cut you off on the line to get coffee. No sadness when you saw a stray puppy, no happiness when someone congratulated you at the office and treated you with a pastry.

You should’ve listened to and accepted the signs before now, so it would’ve been easier but you didn’t and nothing really assured you that if you did, it would’ve been easier. Maybe it would’ve turned out the other way around. Ripping it like a Band-Aid had never been the way you rolled, but torturing yourself over a single event wasn’t something you were fond of, either.

A thump. That was it; that was all you could feel. A thump given by your heart the moment your eyes laid on his figure when you came back home from work and saw him either staring out the window or hunched over the counter as he prepared coffee. A thump, a single flip and then it died down again, leaving a ghostly feeling behind, making you question if you still had a working heart or not.

Was it a happy one? Was it sad? Was it melancholic in advance, missing him even before he was gone in the first place? You weren’t sure.

At the moment, you knew you should’ve felt frustrated, angry as you threw your bag onto the couch and slipped off your shoes. You should’ve been frustrated because he wasn’t saying anything. You should’ve been angry that he was so adamant on keeping his phone out of your view. But you weren’t; you weren’t frustrated or sad or angry. You just were.

You just existed as you tried to accept that this was it and that it was okay; that this was how life worked most of the time and that you weren’t the only one that ever thought of finding the one to lose them some time later; maybe months, maybe years, but eventually, anyways.

You tried to give yourself a pat on the back or smack yourself out of the miserable state but you couldn’t because you couldn’t even move as you saw him. Still, almost petrified as he looked out the window with his hands tucked on the pockets of his pants.

“You can go if you want to”. Your voice was merely a whisper but you knew he had heard you loud and clear, he always did even when he pretended he didn’t. You also didn’t have to say much, he knew you didn’t just mean the apartment, Sehun knew what you were talking about, probably knew what you were feeling better than you knew yourself.

Maybe Sehun could feel your uncertainty and heartbreak for weeks on end and the thought made you feel apologetic.

Sehun knew what you were thinking and you were thankful for that. You loved him for that but it was probably too late to remind him of the fact.

“I’m not sure if I want to”. He muttered, turning his head so he could look at you from over his shoulder. You didn’t want to dwell on the strange glimmer that covered his eyes and snuck from behind the longer, darker strands of hair that fell over his forehead, because you didn’t want to break down in front of him, because of him. He had had enough of seeing you in that state and you’ve had enough of feeling that way but it was unavoidable.

“If there’s any doubt then we both have to leave”. You forced out a smile even if it wasn’t sincere. Your voice was shaking because you were acting against your will and your heart but you’d rather end on good –great, even– terms than to let things go down hill and spiral onto something you’d rather not remember at all.

You were letting Sehun go even if you didn’t want to but you didn’t want to force him to be with you when he clearly didn’t feel comfortable anymore. A shiver ran up and down your spine.

You had your fair share of forcing people into situations just to get what you wanted. You’ve experienced enough crises due to your selfishness and you knew, even when you wanted to hold him and feel his arms engulf you and pull you in onto his torso as he buried his nose in your hair, even when you wanted that more than anything, you weren’t going to force him to stay.

You loved Sehun and you knew you’d love him always and that was mainly why you had let him go. Because you wanted his happiness more than your own, you always had. He had deserved more since before you were a thing, and you knew, yet he seemed to finally have realized that you had been right since all those years ago, when you talked on your rooftop.

You knew he had finally realized that when he left with tears rimming his eyes but you tried really hard not to dwell on that, even when your heart broke out from its numb shell and sent waves of sharp, unbearable pain to your whole body.

Is that how it feels? To lose it all? Like it burns you to the core and then it leaves you to freeze over memories that you can never have back and you can’t run, can’t hide, can’t do anything about it than to go back to the places and times where you were the happiest as your heart continued to freeze even more and your charcoal bones shivered with melancholy.

You probably deserved it but even after a few weeks, you wanted someone to hold you and put you back together. You didn’t know if you had lost one too many pieces of yourself for good now. Maybe you’d never be whole again because Sehun was a huge part of you and he was gone. And with him gone, you felt like a stranger in your own body.

As broken as you were, you wanted someone to tell you it would be fine, even if they didn’t mean it. Even if their words were empty and meaningless. You just wanted to hear them and you knew it was risqué but there was no one else who could’ve comforted you better.

No one in this world was as warm as him. And you were too dumb and heartbroken to think things through in a better, more careful manner.

You knocked on his door with a shaky hand. It could’ve gone two ways. One was he opened the door and thought you were here to ask him to come back and apologize for not fighting for him and the other was, his best friend opened the door and he comforted you like you needed to be comforted.

“Hey…” Chanyeol greeted you that afternoon, when you finally got out of bed after almost three weeks and mustered up both the strength and courage to leave your comfort zone. He greeted you with a knowing smile and understanding, welcoming eyes as he engulfed you in a hug. Dumb of you to think he wouldn’t know.

You sighed, not really capable of speaking up. Your throat was too dry and you were beyond weak. A part of you grew sadder when Sehun didn’t open the door but you knew it was a good thing, sort of, the beginning of closure.

Chanyeol’s embrace was the temporary shelter you were looking for.

You didn’t know what you expected by coming here. You didn’t even remember the exact moment you decided to accept the invitation and bought your plane ticket. It’s as if your mind was sparing you the doubt and embarrassment of reappearing into your friends’ lives after being away for so long.

Did you expect things would magically change and everything to be as it was? With all the guys acting as nothing happened between you and Sehun, as if you didn’t break each other’s hearts? As if you didn’t basically push him to walk away? As if he didn’t hide things from you and grew cold towards you? As if you didn’t give up on your relationship?

Hopefully, yes, but you knew better than that. You weren’t quite sure on the details, Chanyeol always tiptoed around the subject more carefully and discretely than the others; if he could avoid talking about or mentioning Sehun, he definitely would and you were sure it’d be the same with you when he was with Sehun. You weren’t sure but you knew the generalities of it all because, at times, someone would let something slip.

Like the time you were having dinner and some drinks with Chanyeol, Baekhyun and Junmyeon.

Somehow Sehun had come up to conversation. You tried to keep your smile frozen on your face, tried to not make it obvious that it still stung, hearing his name. Baekhyun was laughing, maybe he had one too many drinks for the night, maybe he didn’t mean it when he said Sehun had been with her. You smiled because drunken Baekhyun was a funny sight but you also smiled to hide the consuming, burning sensation that originated on your -mostly- empty chest.

Chanyeol knew it hurt. Even if it hurt him as well, he knew you were hurting more than anyone, more than ever, probably. Chanyeol knew you were in constant pain, even if you tried to hide it from him, even if he tried to fix you. Chanyeol knew; that’s why he kicked Baekhyun on his shin and squeezed your knee gently. Because he knew.

You had gotten closer to the rest of Chanyeol and Sehun’s friends due to your relationship. You weren’t wary because you knew it’d happen eventually and you appreciated having more people around. Just like you became close to Jongin and Minseok, with time you grew closer with the rest, especially Baekhyun and Kyungsoo.

Baekhyun was like a burning ray of sunshine. Much like Chanyeol but even louder than him, which could be overwhelming at times but it helped you when you were feeling blue. Kyungsoo was the friend you could vent to whenever Chanyeol wasn’t around or you felt your feelings were too much for Chanyeol to handle, especially with your past… and your present, at the moment, for all that mattered.

You didn’t want to burden Chanyeol or make him think like he wasn’t doing a good job on rebuilding you, but you still had some common sense left in you and you wouldn’t want to talk about Sehun to Chanyeol all that often. You didn’t want to hurt him again.

You had made your intentions clear since the beginning. You knew it wasn’t smart, but you needed the escape. It had taken you two long enough to fall back into place for you to ruin everything on the first chance you got, due to Sehun of all reasons.

You had chosen Sehun over Chanyeol. You had broken Chanyeol’s heart over your unexpected love towards Sehun and now you were here. Muffling your weeps and cries with Chanyeol’s soft black sweatshirt.

Chanyeol held you tight against his chest whenever you needed to let some tears fall. Even when you felt rather content during the day, at the end, when night fell upon you, your heart remained empty and your tears were too many to hold back. Your chest didn’t burn with pain anymore but crying became a part of you, a reflex, like breathing. You cried in reflex, due to his absence and it hurt but you knew that it would stop eventually.

You’d never stop missing him, you’d never stop loving him, you just hoped you’d stop crying soon.

“Thank you for coming”. You said after clearing your throat, wiping your tears with the back of your hand as you sat cross-legged on top of your bed, where you had been lying, wrapped in Chanyeol’s embrace. He watched you closely as you straightened up and tucked your hair behind your ears, sniffling from time to time.

His hand flew to your back, rubbing soothing circles against you, trying to comfort you and relax you.

“I’ve told you over and over. I’m always here whenever you need me”. And so, the guilt came back again, for dragging him into this, unwillingly, without another hidden meaning; just you being broken, just you being lonely. Just you needing comfort from someone you knew loved you, because the one you loved was gone.

“It’s selfish of me to ask you this but… Would you stay? Because I need you, Chanyeol. I really do”. You turned over your shoulder, trying not to think that you were mirroring Sehun’s stance on the day that he left. Trying not to let your mind wander back to him. Your eyes filled with tears once more as you met Chanyeol’s warm, almond orbs.

Chanyeol smiled at you, a soft, tender smile as his hand travelled up to your shoulder and he found support in you to sit up as well, resting his head on your other shoulder as he squeezed you gently. You looked down at him, he looked so soft and pure with this longer hair becoming fluffier and curlier as it kept growing out, and there you were, once more, taking advantage of his beautiful soul.

“As long as you need me to. For whatever you need me or want me to. I’m here”. He murmured and you smiled an empty smile. You laid your hand on your knee, open for him to grab and so he did and he intertwined your fingers without a second thought.

Chanyeol didn’t leave your side since that day. For whatever you wanted, which was kind of uncalled for but you two were humans. Young humans with physical needs and so he was there all the time, whenever you called. You had explained that you couldn’t do it, –a relationship with him, that is– not at the moment. Not when the memories of Sehun still lingered raw and fresh on your memory.

Chanyeol was okay, he understood that neither of you were ready to be in a relationship but he still put his body and soul at your mercy until the day you left and he was okay with that, too. Because Chanyeol was an angel.

Chanyeol picked you up shortly after; surprising you with how fast he got there and making you scold him for driving so recklessly.

“You said you were very hungry so I sped”. He shrugged as he took your luggage from you and carelessly threw it onto the back seat of his SUV before holding the door open for you to get in. You huffed.

“You know how hungry it’ll make me when you get into an accident for driving like that?” You complained, now fully seated. He laughed out loud, smacking the door shut and walking around with a smile plastered on his face.

The conversation was light, almost non-existent after that. You were too distracted by the view. Remembering the streets and spotting a few familiar people, mostly the owners or employees of the places you frequented.

“Do you want to drop off your bags first or do you want to grab something to eat first?” Chanyeol asked as he lowered the music’s volume, looking at you intermittently from the corner of his eye. You scoffed.

“I’d rather not carry my shit-ton of luggage around, thank you very much”. Chanyeol laughed again, squeezing your hand for a split second before continuing to drive.

It dawned on you, once he parked his car in front of the oh-so-familiar building, what he meant when he said ‘drop off your bags’. Your breathing hitched and you felt your hands sweating; everything around you was suddenly spinning. You were scared to see him once more, then again, you didn’t think Chanyeol would be so fool.

When he noticed the look of despair taking over your eyes, he put a hand over your knee, patting you a couple times to get your attention. You could feel your brow furrowing, your jaw tensing up, you could feel every muscle of your body trying to hold back the urge to sprint away and yet you were still frozen in place. So you looked at him with a terrified expression that you were positive looked quite insane and, honestly, quite unpleasant.

“He moved out a couple months ago, it’s okay”. Chanyeol said, a forced smile taking over his lips. It’s as if he read your mind, then again, Sehun was the main topic of most of the conversations you two had, especially on the first years after the ‘event’. As you liked to call it.

And there it was; your heart flipping once more. At the mention of him. At the thought and memories of him. At a simple ‘what if’. What if he was there, what if you saw him again? What if he saw you again? What if he wasn’t alone?

What if you couldn’t handle it?

Being back there was bittersweet. It looked basically the same as you remembered it; still quite messy but not as much. Less dirty dishes, that was for sure.

You knew taking a look around was harmless yet you were also aware of the feelings it was going to stir within you. Chanyeol huffed as he took your bags somewhere else, letting you alone in the living room as you contemplated on whether or not to walk down the long hall that you knew would take you to his bedroom.

Former bedroom.

Of course you gave in, when it came to anything Sehun related, you always gave in and it felt strange. It felt strange to feel how your heart pounded with a constant rhythm. Every step you took meant a strong beat that resonated all through your body and made your ears ring.

Your hand trembled as you grabbed the handle and pushed it open hesitantly. You didn’t know what you were expecting. Maybe by some sort of magic trick he’d be there, waiting for you, but of course he wasn’t so you felt stupid; stupid and empty, just like his room.

Walls were still painted light gray giving it an eerie ambiance, the only piece of furniture left was a worn out nightstand. It stung to see his absence materialize onto the empty room and you imagined that’s what it probably looked inside your heart, with him gone, the only difference would be that the walls inside of you were filled with pictures of him.

How sappy you had become. You scoffed, turning around on your heels, ready to leave.

“Still having a thing for snooping around?” Chanyeol chuckled with eyebrows raised, as he stood right in front of you. You wondered for how long he’d been there, witnessing how your eyes filled with tears by the view of an empty space. You scoffed, again, pushing past him.

It was such a weird time of your life. To attend one of your friends’ wedding. You never thought you’d see the day, then again there was no way of stopping the aging process, let alone life itself and, out of everyone, you always thought of Minseok as the one who would have a more stable, exemplary life.

Minseok had met Mina shortly after you and Sehun started going out –officially– and had become inseparable ever since. You envied them now, in a good way, of course; their relationship sailed smoothly since the beginning. No drama whatsoever. Two years in and they were already living together and as happy as you had ever seen them.

Mina was a sweet girl, smart beyond belief and a bit shy but not as much as to make it awkward. You knew she was a great fit for Minseok and you gave them your unnecessary blessing because you knew they were going to be endgame.

You smiled when you received the immaculate invitation on the mail. Leave it to Minseok to actually send in perfectly designed invitations through mail and to have them arrive on perfect time.

The location was a country club, composed of a lot of bungalows and a main, rustic looking building; another perfect fit for them.

You stood alone at the front door, way before the rest of the guests were supposed to arrive, still wearing your sweats and loose shirt although you already had your hair and makeup in perfect place.

“I’m glad you could make it. I declare myself guilty for thinking you might decline at the last minute”. You heard Minseok chuckle from somewhere to your left. You turned with widened eyes. You had missed him a lot, as well. You had missed everyone, actually, more than you would ever admit.

“I would never”. You laughed, giving him a hug and letting the memories of your college years fill your mind.

“We both know that’s a lie, you’ve turned down your fair share of invitations to come back, but okay, I’ll let it slip this time”. He patted your back as he let you go. You rolled your eyes at him as you tucked your hands in your pockets.

“I can’t come back every time Jongin has a showcase or a master class, I’m not rich, nor have I enough time off available”. Your heart clenched. Those weren’t the only reasons why you had declined to come back but of course they had played a part.

“We miss you a lot, it’s not the same without you. Your bickering really did wonders for the atmosphere around here”. Minseok chuckled. You knew his usage of the first-person plural didn’t include him but your heart wasn’t entirely aware; it was still hopeful.

You cleared your throat, trying to get rid of the heaviness that started to spread to all of your body, originating in your chest.

“Groom shouldn’t be late, that’s the bride’s job. Go on, get ready for the start of rest of your life”. You smiled at him, crooking your head to the side and admiring how his face lit up when you said those words. Minseok truly was a blessing. He smiled widely at you before going back to where he came from.

You sighed as you made your way back to your designated bungalow to finish getting ready, both physically and mentally because God knows, you’d need all the mental and emotional preparation you could get.

Maybe he’d turn down the invitation. Maybe he was busy, maybe he found out you were coming and decided to spare everyone the awkwardness.

Maybe. But you were sure he wouldn’t, because he was an ass but he loved his friends more than anything in the universe and you had to accept that you would get to see him again, from afar, most likely, to say goodbye again.

The ceremony had been beautiful, extremely well-planned, of course. It made you smile, to see how they glowed almost literally. It made you happy but not enough, so that remaining space within you that still felt miserable was quickly filled with alcohol and food.

You watched from the sidelines, leaning against the bar with yet another Gin and Tonic in hand as everyone clapped once the couple’s first dance was over. You smiled for a fleeting second before downing the rest of your beverage and signaling the poor bartender to serve you another one with a twirl of your empty glass.

You hoped Minseok had warned him about the crazy, alcoholic friend he had coming over, otherwise he was probably going to judge you for the rest of his life. It’s not like you weren’t okay with that, anyways.

“Going hard on the alcohol, I see”. Chanyeol said as he walked up to you with the sleeves of his dress shirt rolled over his elbows and his hands tucked in the pockets of his black dress pants. The man, apparently, couldn’t stand to wear a full suit, including a tie, for over an hour. You scoffed at him, rolling your eyes as you dismissed him with your hand.

“I thought this…”. You said as you signaled to the space between your two bodies with your index finger. “…was a judgment free zone. Besides, go big or go home and since I can’t go home, I have to go big. It’s the rules”. You shrugged, mocking an innocent expression. It was his turn to roll his eyes.

“You are home”. Chanyeol added once he got a drink of his own and handed you yours, which the bartender had given to him, as well.

You scoffed, taking the glass from his grasp. You didn’t want to show how much those three simple words had affected you, so you just proceeded to drink again.

A few minutes in silence felt like an eternity, especially because your mind kept wandering off to the fact that you haven’t seen Sehun yet and your heart ached a little bit. The alcohol was helping you with your inner pain but, still, it wasn’t a remedy.

Chanyeol’s hand suddenly appeared in front of your body, extended towards you as he smiled with an inviting aura.

“Let’s lay off the alcohol for a little bit and have a dance. You need a distraction or else, I fear you might explode. I swear I can see smoke coming out of your head”. You sighed, closing your eyes shut but taking his hand, nonetheless.

He led you to the dance floor, where many guests were dancing already. You smiled when you passed the table where Jongin was sitting and he shot you a bright smile of his own, the kind that made his eyes wrinkle and made him look like an excited little kid. You had missed him, too.

Chanyeol twirled you in place when you were at the dance floor, grabbing you by the waist with his right hand and supporting your own with his left one. Something about the moment felt weirdly intimate.

You woke up feeling sore and with a crushing doubt. Whatever had happened the night before, you weren’t quite sure. The amount of alcohol you had consumed was way above your tolerance levels and yet you still went along with it. You were too old to handle the hangover now.

Your head pounded as you stretched your limbs and sat on the edge of your bed, rubbing your temple. A sudden movement from the other side of your bed made your breathing hitch.

God, no. You thought, as flashes of the previous night appeared in your mind. You had made a mistake.

“Good morning”. The holder of the deep voice said, only confirming your suspicions. You hissed, struggling to cover yourself with the crumbled up sheets.

“Chanyeol… Tell me we didn’t…” You stuttered, too scared to look at him so you stayed frozen in place as your eyes locked themselves on a picture frame that laid unbothered and immovable on your desktop.

“I could tell you we didn’t but that would be a lie”. He said, clearing his throat. You felt the bed dip, indicating that he had gotten up. Still too scared to look at him, you just heard him shuffle and get out of your room. You rushed to put on some clothes before running out of your bedroom, still pretty much sporting your bed hair but who cared anyways, there were far more important things.

Like the fact that you had slept with Chanyeol in a drunken night out and –pretty much unconsciously– used him as a rebound.

He looked at you with round eyes, indicating surprise when you stormed out of your room into the living room.

“Chanyeol, I- I didn’t mean… It wasn’t my intention, I don’t really remember much, I-” You stuttered nonsense, still trying to avoid eye contact with him. He laughed loudly at you as he walked over to wrap his arms around you in a tight, reassuring hug.

“It’s okay. I can be your rebound whoever many times you want me to, I can keep my feelings at bay. Actually, after seeing you drooling and snoring at night, I think I might’ve fallen out of love”. He chuckled as he patted your back before letting you go and exiting your apartment.

After a song or two, you weren’t sure, Chanyeol stopped the swaying and looked at you in the eye, taking you out of your trance.

“How are we holding up?” You were taken aback by the question. Whether he meant you and him, together or just you with your emotional breakdowns, you weren’t sure. You blinked rapidly before laughing awkwardly and stepping away.

And then something, or rather someone appeared in your peripheral and you wanted to melt into a puddle so the tears that you knew were bound to show up wouldn’t be noticeable. Even if it was through the corner of your eye, even if it was in a crowded room with people dancing in the space between you, even then, you knew it was him.

You felt his presence in your soul and his stare made your bones shake. Slowly but surely, you turned your head in his direction to confirm that you weren’t crazy, to confirm that it wasn’t the alcohol making you see things that weren’t there.

But he was there. Looking at you intently with his dark, piercing eyes and he looked exactly as you remembered him. His hair was longer, parted in the middle, giving him an even more mysterious aura than he already had. You shivered, tearing your eyes away from him slowly.

You stumbled a little bit and made your way onto the bar again, this time asking for a shot instead. You needed something stronger. You hissed, slamming down the small glass onto the counter. Chanyeol sat on one of the stools, still looking in Sehun’s direction with a smile that was either angry or knowing, you weren’t quite sure.

The song shifted right when you turned around as well. As if by not seeing him would mean that he was going to disappear. As much as it hurt, you didn’t want him to disappear. Even if you didn’t talk or go near him, you’d feel fine by just seeing him from afar again. To make sure that he was doing okay.

The soft piano melody resounded through the room and the couples who were dancing stood closer together, engulfing each other on their partner’s arms. The gentle, melodic voice sent shivers through your spine again.

“Have you talked to him yet?” Chanyeol asked. You looked at him with a crooked eyebrow, trying to ignore the sharp pain that the mere fact of ending your stare down with Sehun ignited in you.

You gulped before clearing your throat. Sehun’s presence was like dry cinnamon sticking to your throat walls. It was bad yet it gave you some sort of rush.

It was the Sehun effect. It was back. You didn’t want it to be back but at the same time you didn’t want it to go away again.

“Would I be standing here, nervous mess and all, if I had?” You replied sarcastically, knowing very well how much Chanyeol loved those types of replies from you. Especially on serious occasions. “Besides… Even if there was something to talk about –which there is not–, that wouldn’t mean I’d be willing to talk to him. Not now at least. Maybe in another five years”.

You rolled your eyes, avoiding Chanyeol’s judgmental face. You knew you sounded conceited and quite immature for almost a thirty-year-old. But heartbreak made you sourer than you already were and unforeseen scenarios only worsened the situation.

“Don’t think I enjoy being a therapist. Quite honestly, I think we both know how much I despise the fact that you pulled me into that position and I don’t intend on giving you advice on this. So let’s just have another dance and hopefully that will make you lose the frown for at least three minutes... For Minseok’s and Mina’s sake”.

You scoffed but still followed him back to the dance floor, this time avoiding every form of contact with him until you stood back in place.

“I always told you that I’d understand if you didn’t want to talk about it… Or be around me, for that matter. I never forced you to be there for me, I just needed… someone”. You said in a weak voice as you started swaying to the rhythm of the music again.

“And I knew that everything was just because you were heartbroken; you also knew how I felt towards you. How did you expect me to react when I saw you hurting? I couldn’t even help you fully because no one really knew why you two broke up, in the first place. I wanted to get you out of that state and then you suddenly disappeared”.

It was a good thing that you were resting your head on his shoulder, so he wouldn’t see how guilty you were feeling. You had been awful to Chanyeol all along, from the beginning to the end and he was still there.

In one of the turns Chanyeol took, you saw Sehun was now sitting with Jongin, Baekhyun and the rest, eyes still glued to you two as you danced your sorrows away. You clenched your free hand onto a fist but relaxed immediately when you saw him laughing sincerely with his group of friends.

Chanyeol was right. No one ever knew why you two broke up because life changed in an ordinary moment and you didn’t want to burden your group of friends with your relationship issues and now you knew, Sehun thought the same thing because he, also, didn’t tell anyone.

Bottled up feelings were amazing, weren’t they?

“I need a moment”. You said, actually, more like whispered, to Chanyeol. You patted his back as you exited the room and went out to get some fresh air. You hugged yourself when a chilly breeze hit you. The sun was setting, the birds were chirping and you could hear some sort of creek running in the distance; everything seemed so serene around you and yet there you were, just being your usual, wrecked self.

After walking around for ten minutes or so, you came across a couple swings. You sat down, letting out a breath you didn’t know were holding as you contemplated the pink-toned sunset before you.

You rested your head against the swing’s chain, careful not to get your hair tangled on it and you let your eyes close, starting to doze off as you felt the alcohol diluting in your bloodstream, slowly.

“So, you came…”. His hoarse voice made your eyes shot back open again. Your heartbeat was erratic; you fisted the fabric of your dress. You would’ve jumped from the swing but you didn’t have enough strength to do so.

Sehun walked around the swings to take a seat on the empty one besides you. You watched him silently but still quite surprised.

“So did you”. You replied once he was settled down. You watched him as he looked up at the sky. The peach toned light hitting his face perfectly, in ways you had forgotten it was possible. His Adam’s apple bobbed up and down as he gulped.

“It’s Minseok’s wedding, I wouldn’t miss it”. He raised an eyebrow as he looked back at you. You scoffed, trying to mask your nervousness.

“Ditto”. You laughed dryly, looking back at the –now darker– sky. Maybe appearing calm as you contemplated the clouds would make it seem like you weren’t basically dying inside, like you weren’t fighting back the urge to hold his hand, to hug him, to tell him that you missed him.

He smiled at your response, you couldn’t help but smirk, as well.

Silence, a dear old friend, came back to settle upon you two. You wondered if he could read you like a book still. You wondered if he was able to sense how tense you were, how anxious yet relaxed, at the same time. You wondered if he was feeling the same way.

“I heard you became an Editor in Chief, congratulations”. He said, smiling with pursed lips. You looked at him again with a puzzled expression. Everyone had tried to guard you from whatever Sehun was doing with is life, yet apparently, it hadn’t been like that with him. “Must be hectic”.

You laughed dryly, looking down at your hands and at how they were still clenching your dress.

“Thanks. Nothing I can’t handle, though”. You said, trying to sound proud and confident. Failed attempt, probably.

“I know that”. Sehun said, starting to sway on the swing slightly. You watched him, careless of if it appeared creepy. You wanted to memorize him again. Not that you had forgotten about him, not in the slightest, you just wanted to refresh your memory. Pin point the freckles on his face and neck in case you wouldn’t see him again after today.

“You and Chanyeol seem to have gotten even closer, how’s that working out?” And there it was. You had been expecting him to bring up the subject, ever since you caught him staring at you two on the dance floor and you felt his eyes follow you around when you talked to Chanyeol. Sehun wasn’t blind but he also wasn’t aware.

“He’s a good friend”. You said, voice monotone. Sehun stopped swaying to turn his head to look at you, a frown taking over his forehead. “What? Did you expect me to tell you we were together? Newsflash, I don’t feel that way towards him anymore, in case you forgot”.

Assuming things was one of the reasons why the relationship ended and there you were again. As if it hadn’t ruined you and gave you unbearable discomfort for years on end. Sehun and you locked eyes. He was confused and you were dumbfounded and that stirred fury within you, reason why you blurted out an unnecessary question.

“How’s Sunhee?” You raised your eyebrows at him. At that point, whether tears rimmed your eyes or not, you didn’t care.

“I wouldn’t know, I haven’t talked to her in years”. Sehun said, voice deeper than usual as his eyes bore onto yours. You turned your head around, drying the single tear that was rolling down your cheek with the back of your hand.

“Hey, lovebirds! It’s picture time!” At the sound of Baekhyun’s yelling, you both turned your heads over your shoulders, seeing the overly excited, probably too-drunk-to-function friend of yours, waving his arms at you.

You sighed, getting up and smoothing down your dress. “Let’s go”. You muttered, trying to pretend you didn’t say anything before Baekhyun’s interruption.

Sehun trailed closely behind you, so close you could feel his bodily heat warming up your exposed back. Everyone was already waiting for you in one of the room’s balconies, with the couple standing in the middle. They were all laughing and cracking jokes and, God did you miss them.

Chanyeol stood on the further end, smiling at you; this time you knew it was a knowing, caring smile. You were thankful for Chanyeol.

Sehun stood closely next to you.

“Just like the old times” Jongin said, half laughing as you all stood up straight for the photo to be taken. You smiled as well.

“Scoot in closer together!” The photographer yelled, making hand gestures. Your heart skipped a beat when you felt Sehun’s hand on your shoulder, you couldn’t help but look up at him when he did so. A flash took you out of your trance, making you face forward and smile to the camera.

After a few more shots were taken everyone scattered again. Jongin dragged Sehun and the rest to the dance floor; he was eager to show off his dance moves and have fun with his friends, just like old times.

You took that as your cue to escape to your small bungalow.

As soon as you changed out of your dress and laid on bed, your body caved to tiredness, both mental and physical and you fell asleep.

Hours passed, you weren’t sure how many. The sky outside was still pretty dark, the music had stopped at some point, so you assumed it was well into the night and yet, now you felt unable to fall back asleep. You poured yourself a glass of water before adventuring back out. Your feet dragged you to the set of swings from before.

As if your body wanted to relieve the few minutes you had spent with him before. You stopped on your tracks when you saw a figure already sitting at the swings. You laughed dryly, rolling your eyes but you thought, fuck it and you made your way to him.

“Having trouble sleeping as well?” He muttered when you stopped next to him. You shrugged, even when you weren’t sure if he could see you.

“I’ve gotten used to not getting much sleep”. You muttered, taking a seat on the unoccupied swing.

Sehun looked at you with a crooked eyebrow and a smug smirk.

“Still a terrible liar”. You scoffed, not taking your eyes off of him.

The sound of birds chirping had been replaced by the crickets; giving the atmosphere a calmer, gentler, more melancholic feeling. Ironically suitable for your company.

Silence wasn’t uncomfortable, yet it wasn’t the most pleasant. It was filled with sadness, regret and feelings you couldn’t put into words. You wanted to have him back in your life, yes, it didn’t matter if it wasn’t as a lover. You missed your best friend more than anything. You missed his sarcasm and his brutal honesty but you didn’t know how to say that.

How could you fix something that you weren’t sure why it broke in the first place? You knew the trust had been damaged, you knew you probably pushed him away with your behavior so how were you supposed to apologize for that? For not trusting him? For shutting him out?

“I’m sorry”. His words made you jump. “I’m sorry for hurting you and for not telling you about what happened. I was terrified that you might hate me and probably kill me in my sleep”. Sehun laughed emotionlessly. What a dumbass. “Didn’t realize it made things worse, I just didn’t want to make you feel hurt. I guess I sort of forgot that you were extremely good at reading people and have like a sixth sense of sorts”. He huffed. You rolled your eyes.

“Because hiding that you were talking to an ex-girlfriend that had expressed her disgust towards me so fervently and denying it when I asked you about it was the way to go”. You said. You couldn’t help the venom that spilt with every word you pronounced; it still hurt yet it also hurt that you reacted so childishly about it.

“I know I fucked up. I know it probably looked very twisted, I know I should’ve told you about her brother being a friend of mine and the situations he was involved in. I should’ve explained instead of keeping it all to myself. But I thought you knew I would never cheat on you, let alone with her”.

Sehun rested his elbows on his knees, head turned to your direction as he scanned your face for whatever hint of emotion you might show.

“I’m sorry for not letting you explain and for assuming things. What made me mad wasn’t the possibility of you finding someone else, it was the feeling that the trust we had was destroyed; that my best friend was gone”. You felt your throat tightening little by little as you spoke; as you remembered the things that led you to your break up.

The uncertainty, the silence. Sehun coming to bed late at night without letting you know. The secrets. His sassy, sarcastic persona disappearing as time went by.

The crickets’ chirping grew louder, as did so the water on the stream. It felt unreal, to be there, confessing your wrong doings to each other after five years of not meeting, of not talking, of not knowing anything about the other and yet him always lingering at the back of your mind. A reminder that you had lost the one you loved the most because of a tantrum, most likely.

The moon shined brightly up in the sky and it had a calming effect on you. It was either the moon or Sehun, or maybe the combination of the two. After a few minutes in relative silence, Sehun cleared his throat, sighing after doing so.

“Seeing you with Chanyeol made me realize how much I miss you… Not that I didn’t miss you before, of course, but... It killed me a little bit, not going to lie. Seeing you dancing with him, talking to him, laughing and rolling your eyes at what he said. I miss that, all of that... So, I guess, what I’m trying to say is: I miss you more than you think and I love you more than I did before, if that’s even possible…”

Everything in you, every centimeter of your skin, every cell in your body went numb. He was still reading your mind; he still had a key to your heart. Sehun, whether he realized it or not, was still able to feel what you were feeling. His head hung low, as he looked intently at his hands rather than looking at you in the eye.

You gulped with difficulty. You felt your heart expand and beat stronger than before, on the verge of exploding. Hearing him say those words was like you reading your own thoughts out loud.

“And if you don’t hate me or won’t kill me while I sleep, I would like to be with you again, if you take me. I want to be the one who makes you smile and roll your eyes when I say something stupid. I want you to kiss me to get me shut up, or the other way around. I want to hug you when you actually want to punch me instead and I want to be the one that buys you your morning latte with two extra shots every morning just so I get to see your frown turn into a smile... If you let me. If you forgive me for being such an oblivious idiot”.

He raised his head to look at you again, a hint of a sad smile threatening to appear on his face.

If you jumped onto his arms, would it seem desperate?

You stood up, instead, feeling his eyes follow your every movement closely. You put a hand on his shoulder as you looked down at him, probably with stars in your eyes.

“We’re both oblivious idiots”. He smiled brightly at you. “Pull that move on me again and I will kill you in your sleep”. You tried to sound threatening but it was useless as the smile on your face was too big to pull it off.

“Do you really have to leave so soon?” Jongin pouted as they all walked you to the airport. You had insisted they shouldn’t come because you knew they all had things to do but, as usual, no one really listened to what you had to say.

“I have things to take care of on the other side of the country, Jongin”. You sighed, pulling your bag over your head to secure it in place.

“It’s not our fault you decided to flee to a city that’s so far away, is it?” Jongin huffed, acting like a little boy. You laughed, seeing how Sehun cleared his throat before unceremoniously shoving Jongin away with more force than necessary and then pretending he didn’t almost kill the poor man.

You laughed at them, still acting like younglings.

“Let us know when you land”. Chanyeol said with a smile from where he was standing behind Minseok. You nodded, also with a smile. You waved them goodbye as you started to make your way to security.

You were almost there when you felt a hand hold onto yours. You turned around with a confused frown.

“It’s not like old times if you don’t take this nuisance with you”. Sehun smiled proudly at you while pointing at himself with his index finger, as if he had made some groundbreaking comment or discovery of sorts.

“This nuisance is probably going to annoy the shit out of the airplane crew and have it crash somewhere”. You raised your eyebrows at him but still, continued to go through security with him sticking right behind you.

“Well, for the record, you’re the only one that thinks I’m annoying to point where people would kill themselves to get rid of me… But, if that happens, at least we would’ve lived and died together”.

You let out a laugh due to his twisted logic as you proceeded to put on your jacket and your shoes again as you were now done with security check.

“What a privilege”. You scoffed, rolling your eyes at him as you waited for him to be done.

“It’d be my pleasure to die by your side, knowing that you love me, at least a little bit”. He raised his eyebrows at you and you rolled your eyes once more as you extended your hand for him to take.

He did and he didn’t let go.

151 notes · View notes

gyeommark · 6 years ago

Text

vagary . ii

Chanyeol x Reader Genre: Angst. Fluff. Smut in future parts. Words: 5.5k Warnings: Strong language, mentions of alcohol use. A/N: Now, I’m deeply sorry for the delay, as some might know, I was having some issues but part two is finally here. Didn’t proof read but hope you enjoy (or not hate it, at least)! A/N2: Since tumblr is a b*tch with the links, you can find Vagary’s mini masterlist on my blog along with links to my other works .x

The heaviness in your chest when you woke up threw you off onto an uncertain abyss. A feeling you hadn’t had in a long time. A fluttering nothingness.

You cursed to yourself, knowing very well that you had found yourself at the start of yet another rocky, dark, tormenting path and the welcoming sign had his name and face and, above all else, his endearing smile, all over it.

You judged yourself, trying to comprehend how it was humanly possible to dream of someone you had met only a limited amount of times through out the last month and yet he still haunted every nook and crevice of your mind.

“You’re doing it again…” Baekhyun huffed as he made you trip with his own foot as you two walked down the street after your lessons had ended, later than usual as the starry night looked out over you. You were thankful the day after was your day off.

“I’m doing what again?” You asked, clearly annoyed as you regained your balance and shot him the death glare.

“That thing you do when you’re daydreaming about something. I think they call it ‘smiling stupidly like a puppy begging for treats’… Just that puppies aren’t stupid but you, on the other hand…” Baekhyun laughed at his own joke as he tried to avoid the pinches and jabs you were throwing his way.

“I swear on everything that’s holy that I have no idea what you’re talking about right now”. You tried to shrug it off, sighing. Yes, you knew what he meant but did that mean you were going to admit you were thinking of a man continuously because it made you feel happy; or at least, less miserable, and that said man happened to be that friend of his he had been teasing you with continuously since you met him?

Hell, no. If needed be, you were willing to hold that secret close to your heart until the day you died, take it to your grave and up to heaven or down to hell, whichever way you would go after your passing, that didn’t really matter.

“Mhm… My dashing eyes may be on the smaller side but I’m not blind”. You laughed at Baekhyun’s comment. His confidence and self-esteem was something you strived to and one of the main reasons he was your best friend.

“Maybe not blind, just delusional”. You cackled as you struggled to open the door to your small apartment, hissing curse words under your breath. You made a mental note to call the locksmith to take a look at your front door.

“Hey!” He half yelled, half groaned as he smashed his hand onto the doorframe, blocking your way as he looked intently at you with furrowed brows and pursed lips. “Is it too much to ask to not have you insult me at any chance you get? I was just making an observation”.

As much as you wanted to maintain your offended expression, it was nearly impossible to do so with Baekhyun sporting his guilt-inducing pout. Not that it worked when it came to make you felt guilty, really, but the image of a grown man pouting was ridiculous so, to you, it was kind of funny.

“Well, I mean, delusional is not an insult but rather an adjective as I see it…” You tried to hold back your laugh as you pushed his extended arm out of your way.

“Oh, smarty-pants, I hope you drop your attitude before my showcase or I might as well take you off of my guest list and deprive you of a night filled with free drinks”. He threatened you with a finger pointing at you, dangerously close to your eyes.

“How could I survive?” You cackled as you replied sarcastically at him. “If only I worked as a bartender… Oh, wait”.

Baekhyun’s pout kept getting bigger, the more you talked back at him.

“Continue doing that. You wont get to see your precious Chanyeol boy until god-knows when”.

You wished, at that time, you had more self-control. You wished you could think before feeling and therefore before reacting. But you were either too dumb or too sentimental and, to your dismay, Baekhyun was too perceptive when he put his mind to it.

Maybe he had x-ray vision and he could see your stomach dropping to the ground at the mention of him; maybe he could see the hoards of whatever insect that were flying around your thorax, throwing themselves on to your ribcage, trying to escape. Maybe he could see you biting on the inside of your cheek and, maybe, he could see your heart beating with a fickle pace.

Maybe you were just too blunt. You probably had to work on that.

“Shut up. As far as I’m concerned, he’s your friend, not mine”. You shook your head before turning away from him and threw your bag someone behind your couch, trying to calm yourself down as you felt your hands start to tickle at the mere mention of a man you barely knew.

“Well, as far as I’m concerned, you have far more interest in him than me but whatever…” Baekhyun scoffed and shrugged and you could still feel his eyes glued to your back; somehow, you knew he was smirking but you couldn’t brace yourself to turn around and smack him because you were far too focused on calming yourself down.

“Anyhow… I’ll let you to deal your mushy feelings by yourself”. As soon as you heard the door click closed, you groaned and threw yourself onto your sofa.

You had no idea how much time it had passed, since the lack of light indicated nothing whatsoever. It could either be 10 p.m. or two in the morning. Your sleep scheduled was already messed up so who gave a fuck?

Footsteps from around the corner startled you, yet not enough as to make you stand up.

“What the hell are you still doing here? I heard you come in like three hours ago”. You looked at your roommate, from the corner of your eye as you huffed.

“Too tired to move, Deb”. Besides Baekhyun, your roommate was probably the one who knew you the best, it was a shame they didn’t really get along… Or maybe it was for the best, if they united forces it would be the end for you and, honestly speaking, you weren’t really ready to deal with that.

“Tired from what?” She groaned as she poured herself a glass of water from the sink. “Arguing with your annoying friend over what’s-his-face?”

At her words, you immediately sat up straight, with a deep frown that was almost hurting your face muscles. Once she came back into your field of vision she swallowed her water and looked at you with a confused expression mixed with her remaining sleepiness.

Opposite from you, she had quite the organized life. Going to sleep early, taking morning classes and working part time on the afternoon, five days a week. You somewhat envied her determination and that, somehow, complimented your mess of a life, driven by pure dreams and desires.

“Did you hear that?” You questioned her, almost choking on your own saliva as you wiped your sweaty hands on your jean-covered legs.

“Well, I mean, your friend yells instead of talking, how did you expect me not to hear that?” You huffed, praying that she wouldn’t question you on Chanyeol. “And did you also expect me not to notice how out of it you’ve been? More than usual, I mean. I know its kind of like an artist’s trait but you suddenly started listening to corny songs while taking a shower? It’s kind of annoying but I mean, it’s none of my business”.

You pursed your lips into a hopeless smile, her words a confirmation that you weren’t as discrete as you thought you were and a strong motive for you to stay as far away from Chanyeol as possible.

It shouldn’t be that hard, you thought, he was just a fairly good-looking, charming acquaintance, that was it.

Park Chanyeol might as well become yet another meaningless crush. Like the ones you get when you’re riding the bus or the subway, or when you’re in line to check-out at the grocery store. He might as well be forgotten after a couple days, then again, why was he so rooted into your head after almost a month?

“Are you nervous?” You chuckled as you watched Baekhyun pace around the small excuse of a waiting room that the fancy bar had provided for him. You sipped on a beer, crossing your legs as you followed his restless figure as it moved from one end of the room to the other.

“Me? Nervous? Please, I was born for this” Baekhyun scoffed as he stole a daring glance from you. Where was Mr. Confidence when needed? You laughed at your own thought.

A knock on the door finally made Baekhyun stop on his tracks, you looked at the clock hanging on the wall, wondering if it was one of the staffs coming to tell him that it was his time to go onto the small, questionably stable stage.

You stood up, ready to leave when you saw a head peek from behind the door and immediately, your heart skipped a beat, quickly followed by a self scolding.

“Hey” Chanyeol smiled, messy hair almost covering his eyes, making you tingle all over. You hated the feeling, yet it felt nice at the same time. Bittersweet. “I just wanted to say hi before you went up and tell you to break a leg”. He smiled as he entered the room completely and your heart continued to not listen to your orders.

Baekhyun smiled brightly at him before stealing a glance in your direction.

“Remember my friend?” Baekhyun said, basically pulling you towards Chanyeol, you pursed your lips. “You could keep her company tonight, she’s bitter and doesn’t really talk to a lot of people unless forced to”.

Chanyeol chuckled and you wanted to look away from the dimple on his cheek but it was almost hypnotizing, drawing you in, making you angry at yourself for falling down that spiraling tunnel.

“How could I forget?” Chanyeol looked at you with his warm eyes and you had to remember how to smile but not too much at the same time. “Don’t worry, I’ll keep her safe”. Chanyeol chuckled as he extended an arm in your direction and grabbed you by your shoulder, pulling you closer to him.

You wanted to sneak a peek but then again, that might make you stare. It was dangerous to do anything when it was around him. You were starting to think that even the most mundane of things, like opening your mouth would end up on you doing something idiotic, like forgetting how to close your jack back up and then finding yourself with a damp spot on your shirt.

Yes, it was stupid but you couldn’t deny the possibility of it happening, unfortunately.

Breathing was, also, something so foreign to you at that moment; it was ridiculous that some man could have that effect on you.

Baekhyun’s eyes flickered between you and his giant friend and you could see that glint of mischievousness on his eyes, knowing that he’d tease you even more after tonight yet, Chanyeol’s gentle touch on your shoulder made you push that annoyance to the back of your head, getting lost in the tingling sensation that started at the pit of your stomach and threatened to invade the rest of your body in slow, torturously bubbly tides.

They started joking carelessly after that, as if nothing happened, as if you weren’t basically running out of oxygen and turning blue, as if Chanyeol’s hand wasn’t still lying on your shoulder carelessly.

A man’s voice called Baekhyun out a few minutes after and you three walked out the room and you managed to shrug off Chanyeol’s hand, not because you wanted to loose contact but because you didn’t want to die, not yet, at least.

Two months. Almost two months was all it took for you to realize you were fucked. Close to sixty days was all you needed to develop some sort of ‘feeling’ towards Chanyeol. You didn’t know if it was just the excitement of having someone new in your life, someone who shared some of your ideas, some of your points of view; someone whose presence felt like a cozy blanket around you and a cup of warm chocolate between your hands.

Chanyeol felt comfortable and a simple graze of his hand on your shoulder was all it took for you to realize that your mind couldn’t escape Park Chanyeol.

You sat opposite from him on the small table, trying to keep as much distance from him as possible. A part of you wanted to be close to him though, brush your knee against his accidentally and just live off of that because that was probably as much as you could get and you would be fine with that, but you also didn’t want to seem desperate.

You picket at the skin around your nails, trying to ignore the silence that fell upon you in, even in the moderately loud ambience, trying to ignore his eyes practically burning a hole on your cheek as you scanned the stage, waiting for Baekhyun to appear.

Another bottle of beer suddenly appearing before your eyes surprised you, you looked at the waiter with confusion painted over your face yet you still mouthed a polite thank you before looking at Chanyeol, questioning him silently.

“Wouldn’t want to mix alcohols tonight, would we?” Chanyeol chuckled, half yelling at you. Such a simple action, him noticing how you were drinking beer at the waiting room was all it took for your heart to fly away to another dimension. You cursed under your breath, and even then, you couldn’t suppress the smile on your lips.

“Thank you”. You yelled back, struggling to catch your breath. Chanyeol smiled back and you wanted to tell him to not do that, that it was hard enough for you to just have him there but, of course, that wouldn’t be appropriate of you.

“You and Baekhyun seem quite close”. Chanyeol said after a couple minutes, leaning over the table. Your legs trembled seeing how his body got closer to you.

“He’s like an annoying brother, you could say” You laughed, looking at the stage once more, forcing your eyes away from Chanyeol’s face, flawlessly illuminated by the blue and pink lights, making him look even more endearing.

“He’s always had a pretty good taste when it comes to his friends, if I do say so myself”. Chanyeol chuckled and raised his eyebrows at you as he saw you gulping down on your beer, little did he know you were just doing that to avoid yourself from giggling like a dumbass, in reality, the alcohol consumption would only make things worse, but it was the only solution you could come up with at the moment.

“We’ll see… I’m still unsure about that”. That was what riled you up about yourself, how sometimes you couldn’t just stay quiet and couldn’t filter your thoughts. You weren’t sure if you said that to appear cold hearted or if you were saying it to sound flirty but Chanyeol’s eyebrows shooting upwards for a millisecond and him smirking as he leaned in even closer to you made you think it probably sounded like the latter.

“Oh, a doubtful one”. He chuckled, sipping on his beer before smiling widely at you. “I see how it is, then”. By that moment, you had already grown accustomed to the non-stop pounding coming from inside your chest, making your ribcage tremble with anticipation.

“You see, I barely know you, so…” You squinted your eyes at him before shrugging and mirrored his position as you leaned your elbows on the table, reducing the distance between you. A dangerous decision, indeed.

“Maybe you should get to know me better, then, and I will gladly prove you wrong”. Speechless due to his smooth answer, you refrained yourself and just smiled.

The lights dimmed right in that moment, something you didn’t know if you were grateful for or angry at, but then you saw Baekhyun taking his place in the middle of the small stage and you clapped and yelled loudly, remembering that the reason you were here was because of your friend and not because of Chanyeol, although your mind and heart still had a bit of trouble figuring that out.

“To Baekhyun”. Chanyeol said as he scooted his stool closer to you and tipped his beer bottle in your direction. You smiled, clinking your bottle to his before taking a sip and even then, the corners of your mouth were never able to return to their normal position.

Baekhyun’s voice took over the atmosphere at the crowded bar, it even muffled the murmur of people talking over the sound of the loud music, his voice was the type that was strong yet sweet at the same time, and you smiled even wider than you were doing before.

In the sense that you were happy and proud of him, not that it was that important, because who were you to have an important opinion anyways? But you still felt happy and proud of your friend’s accomplishments, and most of all, his happiness was contagious so, if Baekhyun was happy, so were you and if he was not… Well, if that was the case, he only turned into an annoying human being, period.

“He’s killing it”. You mumbled, realizing a little too late that you were thinking out loud and that there was still a certain presence next to you. Your eyes widened for a split second before giggling nervously as you drank yet another sip of your beer as you stole some looks form the corner of your eye.

Chanyeol laughed silently, as his shoulders moved up and down a little bit, just accentuating the fact that he, apparently, had a thing for working out and wearing tight black shirts.

“You have a nice smile”. You almost choked, putting down the bottle and looking at him with squinted eyes.

“And you have a loose mouth”. You scoffed, standing up and patting his shoulder unceremoniously. “I will need more alcohol for this”. You blurted out as you stepped away and practically rushed to the busy bar, too nervous to wait for a waiter to come around and take your order.

It was like having your body, mind and heart divided into two in the most obvious annoying manner. Chanyeol wasn’t making things easier on you, if anything, every single one of your inner issues had been enhanced ever since you realized you might have developed some sort of chemical reaction called ‘attraction’ towards him.

One half of your whole being was set on acting cold and quick-witted towards him, maybe that way he’d step away before it got too much to handle, yet the other part was almost falling apart at the mere thought of being close to him, seeing him smile or laugh at whatever you said, telling you sweet nothings that most likely meant nothing.

So, your response, -or getaway if you may- to all this was that of every responsible adult out there: alcohol. Curse your sarcastic, yet overly attached nature.

Well into Baekhyun’s second song, you were still standing at the bar waiting for your next round of beer. You locked eyes with your friend as he smiled widely while singing, earning an exaggerated thumbs up from your part. It was okay, it felt nice to forget the frenzy of his presence even if it was for just a couple minutes.

You turned around when you heard the mature looking bartender call you to hand you your two bottles of beer but then, when you turned around again, ready to head back to your torture spot, you felt something falling with a thud inside of your chest; nothing hurt, not really, there was just a hint of heaviness inside of you when you saw a new person sitting on the chair that used to be yours until just a few minutes ago.

But what enhanced the feeling wasn’t the new companionship but the fact that he seemed to be acting exactly the same towards her than he was doing with you before. Then again, who were you to feel special?

That’s when everything started to go downhill, more so than before. That’s when you realized you heart was starting to feel something towards someone you barely knew. That’s when you realized you were fucked up. If Chanyeol was truly insignificant for you, you wouldn’t have felt the thud when you saw him smiling and laughing with his glistening, round, puppy eyes and prominent dimple over something another woman was saying.

If Chanyeol was truly no one, you wouldn’t have cared, you would’ve just walked back to him and greeted the new acquaintance with a smile. But that wasn’t the case, your whole weight fell to your ankles and you hesitated on your spot.

Would you put yourself out there to potentially get your little, naïve heart broken or just leave and pretend nothing happened? Would you leave Baekhyun alone when he counted on you just because things didn’t turn out the way you were expecting with a man you could only, foolishly, crush on?

Hell no, but were you about to endure all that with a sober body? Again, hell no.

“You know what, give me a shot”. You said as you waved to the bartender, who only laughed a little before pouring you your clear looking and who stared at you with pursed lips as you downed it in one go, without a single flinch.

You took a deep breath, holding a bottle in each hand as you walked back to the table, trying your very best to maintain a poker face as got nearer and nearer to the pair who had made you take a stupid tequila shot.

Whether you liked to admit it or not, whoever the female was, she was good looking yet too petite for your taste, specially sitting next to Chanyeol. She raised her eyebrows at you, probably wondering who you were and what the hell you were doing there, interrupting their deep conversation. Hence the sarcasm, you were feeling bitter, so much it even translated onto your thoughts and probably your uncontrollable facial expressions, as well.

Chanyeol followed his friend’s stare until his eyes fell upon you again, maybe he had forgotten you were there and you wouldn’t be surprised, if you were being honest.

“Ah…”. He stuttered as he stood up, almost jumping and knocking down his stool in the process. His eyes frantically traveling from you to the other female. You tried to put the best, fakest smile you could. Not that you cared anymore, but you had to be polite, for Baekhyun’s sake. “Jiae, this is Baekhyun’s friend I was telling you about”. Chanyeol said with a smile as he introduced you two.

Maybe it was what the call the female sixth sense, or maybe you were too sensitive, or maybe it was that shot already having its scary effect on you, but you were convinced she already hated you.

Was that a reflection of what you were feeling, though? No, of course, you had barely met her, hate was a strong word. Dislike, on the other hand…

“Nice to meet you”. You pursed your lips onto a smile as you sat at the other side of the table, facing her as you pushed one of your beer bottles towards her. “Here, you can have it”. She gave you a small smile as she took the bottle in her hand.

Could that have been considered hypocrisy? You weren’t sure. You just didn’t want to make it obvious that you weren’t comfortable anymore, maybe your actions would backfire, then again, you didn’t give a single shit anymore.

After another ten minutes or so, as Baekhyun was taking a break somewhere backstage and you were almost finished with your second beer, you felt her eyes on you. You turned to see her with your eyebrows raised, trying your best not to appear arrogant.

“How long have you known Baekhyun?” She asked, smile not quite reaching her eyes. You cleared your throat as you leaned back. Her presence repelled you, exactly the opposite of how you felt when it was only Chanyeol and you alone. Chanyeol who had been far too quiet since you came back to the table.

“Couple years or so, I’m not sure”. You mumbled, hoping she wouldn’t hear you and she’d just let the forced conversation die without much effort.

“Funny, I haven’t met you before”. You had to take a deep, discrete, breath in order to maintain the rest of your questionably sober sanity in place and not let it disappear in resentment’s hands.

“Baekhyun doesn’t really introduces me to his friends, he fears they might like me better”. You said, almost chuckling when you heard the distant sound of Chanyeol’s stifling a laugh. Whether that was a good or a bad sign, you weren’t sure.

Once Baekhyun’s presentation was done and the loudness of the bar hit your ears at full volume once again, you felt like it was too much to handle so when you caught your friend walking over in your direction, you stood up once again, with the excuse of getting more drinks.

Chanyeol looked at you with wide eyes, mirroring your actions.

“Please, let me, you should keep her company”. You smiled, probably pouring too much bile on to your words, probably not. However he might interpret them was clearly not up to you anymore.

Baekhyun stopped on his tracks as he was just a less than a meter away from you and followed you suit once you were halfway to the counter, yet again.

“I see you’ve met Jiae”. Baekhyun chuckled, leaning his elbows on the slightly wet surface as you silently asked for another round of beers to the bartender, putting up four fingers in the process. “Isn’t she lovely?”

“If this is you trying to be funny, I’m sorry to disappoint but I’m not picking up on your humor right now”. You scoffed, trying to avoid eye contact as you also tried to avoid the painful rumbling in your chest.

Jealousy was a scary, funny thing, especially when you were too stubborn to acknowledge it in the first place.

“Okay, so the bitter evil twin is out to play now, I get it”. Baekhyun chuckled, emotionlessly as he copied your stance. “Should I have mentioned her existence before to spare me the burning and scarring your words are causing on my skin and soul?” Baekhyun raised his eyebrows as he took a hand to his chest, mocking an inexistent pain.

“Why would you? It’s not like I should be interested on your friend’s life, anyways”. You mumbled, and even with the loud music and ambiance, Baekhyun was able to hear you perfectly fine, to your disgrace.

“Listen, you can pretend all you want with everyone else, act like the Ice Queen or whatever, but you’re never going to fool me. So what’s the deal if you admit you like someone? It’s not like the world’s going to end because of that, it’s a human thing… You meet someone, you like someone, maybe you date, maybe you don’t; maybe you just become fuck buddies, what’s the big deal”.

Baekhyun shrugged, stealing a glance from you, probably scared you would jump on his throat due to his accusing comments.

“The human reasonable thing to do here would be stepping away when someone you like, likes someone else, and actually has someone else. Chanyeol is a platonic crush and I won’t interfere with whatever he has going on with that Jiae girl; I don’t have the time nor the patience for that kind of drama”.

It was Baekhyun’s turn to scoff as he shook his head in either annoyance or disbelief.

“Here’s a friendly comment from your most professional, caring advisor. Chanyeol is a peculiar man with peculiar taste, a peculiar man who rarely opens up with anyone. If he, for whatever reason, chooses to talk to someone and get to know them is because that someone has sparked something in him… Then again, the relationship between him and Jiae is still a mystery to everyone because, like I said, he has like a phobia to opening up… Take that as you wish, it was just a comment”.

You looked at him with a slight frown and pursed lips as your beers appeared before you along with another shot, a glass you didn’t ask for but apparently there was an unspoken of, bartender psychic ability to spot an annoyed person.

“Please keep your friendly comments at bay when you know they won’t help and will just make things worse”. You huffed, turning around with Baekhyun trailing close behind you.

“So… Does that mean you like like Chanyeol?” You groaned, downing the shot and leaving the empty glass on an empty table that came across your way.

“Let’s act like I don’t, for everyone’s sake”. You shook your head as you looked down at your feet, trying not to trip over someone else’s feet, or your own, for that matter. The mixing of beer and tequila was something you weren’t approving of, then again, it was the best to drown your sorrows on. Unless they were too unbearable and then you had to add vodka to the mix.

Thankfully you weren’t there yet.

Yet.

You were a martyr but not a drunken one, thankfully. Or maybe you just loved to play the victim role.

You saw Chanyeol looking over his shoulder, he seemed quieter than before. Jiae had her arms crossed over her chest as she analyzed the now empty stage. Maybe she should’ve done that when Baekhyun was on, instead of having her eyes fixed on you, trying to burn a hole through your throat.

Meeting eyes with someone was a dangerous thing, regardless of the situation. Words were less than needed when two pairs of eyes met and, in this case, you wished you could’ve avoided Chanyeol’s gaze because it only made your chest feel heavier than it already was and it made your legs tremble more than they were already doing; no amount of alcohol could even come close to the effect Chanyeol’s dark eyes had on you and you wanted to reboot yourself, put a chip in your system that would prevent you from liking a man you’ve met less than five times before.

Chanyeol pursed his lips onto a thin, undecipherable smile as he stepped aside from his chair, extending an arm on the inanimate object’s direction.

“Take a seat, we’re short on seats”. His voice was low, raspier than usual. You cleared your throat before shaking your head a couple times and placing the two bottles you were holding on the table, a bit too strongly than necessary.

“I will share with Baekhyun”. You said back, an emotionless façade taking over your expressions.

It was easier keeping your distance than dealing with the overflowing, confusing emotions.

Once Baekhyun caught up to your comment, he nodded quickly, awkwardly sitting on one half of the stool as you took your place next to him.

Chanyeol was a tornado, your heart and mind were a house with a weak foundation and a lack of insurance. He had swap you off your feet only to drag you back down a bit too harshly to your liking, then again, there was nothing that needed to be said when you knew you had been the one to make a mistake.

The mistake of idealizing someone you only knew the name of but you couldn’t help the gravitational pull he seemed to have on you.

It would’ve been easier if you had never met his eyes. It would have been easier if you wouldn’t have gotten lost on his charming smile and sweet, smart speech.

It would’ve been easier if there was no Jiae but you knew there was a code. Whatever relationship they had, it was none of your business and you knew you shouldn’t interfere so you just smiled, a forced, surrendered smile.

You didn’t expect Chanyeol to notice, at that point you had forced yourself to admit that he would be the epitome of platonic in your life and that you had to be okay with it. You didn’t expect him to smile back at you with the same smile, he looked defeated and apologetic but you forced yourself to disregard him.

It was the logical, reasonable thing to do but Chanyeol’s mere presence made you question every decision and thought that ever crossed your mind and apparently, everyone in that table noticed it as well.

#chanyeol scenarios #chanyeol scenario #chanyeol fanfic #chanyeol fanfiction #chanyeol angst #chanyeol fluff #exo fanfic #exo fanfiction #exo scenarios #exo scenario #gyeommark writes #vagary

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gyeommark · 6 years ago

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v a g a r y || pcy

Vagary (n.) An unpredictable instance, a wandering journey; a whimsical, wild or unusual idea, desire or action.

Love hurts. They say. But pain is a choice.

You chose to love and you also chose to hurt. You could’ve stopped at anytime, if you so desired; to not go through the torture, but you decided against it because going against the flow was rooted within you. You decided to endure the pain because you decided to love him for as long as possible, even when you knew it was doomed since before it even started.

Chanyeol lured you in into his world. Chanyeol was your salvation and your ruin, altogether.

» angst » mature/sensitive themes » hints of fluff

one || two || ~

#chanyeol scenarios #chanyeol scenario #chanyeol fanfic #chanyeol fanfiction #chanyeol angst #gyeommark writes #exo au #exo angst #exo scenario #exo scenarios #exo fanfiction #exo fanfic

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gyeommark · 6 years ago

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inflection point . vi

Chanyeol x Reader x Sehun

Fake Relationsip!AU, University!AU

8.5k words

Warnings: Strong/explicit language, explicit sexual situations (in future chapters), and a lot more that you’ll catch onto along the way.

A/N: Sorry for the delay, here it is :)

You’d like to say you had enough time by yourself to process the whole situation and figure out how the hell your life was going to work out after what happened but you weren’t worthy of that privilege.

You wanted to say that being alone to figure things out was a privilege which was rudely taken away from you but a part of you knew, even if it was against your principles, that there was no way to figure this out without Sehun, mainly because he was the one who suggested it, secondly because he was the other half of this whole fake relationship act.

“Hey, cheer up. It’s not like you saw a ghost”. Sehun chuckled, following you closely behind as you headed to the class you had with the entire group, the nerve-wrecking thought of sharing a class with Chanyeol had been pushed to the furthest corner of your mind for the first time in what felt like forever.

“No, seeing a ghost would’ve been better. I saw death, instead. I just never thought my Grim Reaper would share faces with Oh Sehun”. You mumbled, plopping onto your seat and letting out a heavy sigh that you had been holding in since the very moment you stepped out of the coffee shop.

Sehun cackled, taking a seat next to you and raising an eyebrow in your direction. “What an overly dramatic girlfriend I’ve found for myself”. He was holding back his laughter and that was driving you insane; seeing him thrive on your discomfort. You snapped your head in his direction when you heard the word girlfriend leave his lips so carelessly. You leaned towards him a little bit with raised eyebrows and pursed lips.

“Fake girlfriend”. You hissed. Sehun snorted, putting his hand over your lips and leaning even closer to you. You wanted to bite him to make him get away.

“Shh”. He hushed you, putting his index finger to his lips. “They may hear you”. Struggling to get away from his grip, you squinted your eyes as if asking who?! There’s no one here that would give a single flying fuck.

That was until you heard that peculiar laugh followed by a series of loud claps. Your heart dropped to your knees before disappearing a thousand feet under ground. Sehun let you go for the sake of maintaining appearances more so than over your constant nudging, you were sure.

“You give me the chills sometimes and no, before you say anything they’re definitely not the good kind”. You hissed at him, readjusting on your seat again and putting on your half fake smile to greet the other three men that came up to sit around you two.

You felt like that particular lecture lasted three times what it normally would. The loud ticking of the clock hanging on the back wall was a constant reminder of everything you had been through in the span of only twenty-four hours. Sehun’s hand lying carelessly on the back on your chair didn’t help the slightest bit with your stress management either.

One tick reminded you of the overly charismatic way Hayoon had to try and get closer to you, another tick reminded you of the warmth of Chanyeol’s hug engulfing and intoxicating you at the same time. Then came another tick that brought back the rage Sunhee had sparked within you and then another one reminded you of the stupid decision you had taken when you decided on dating Sehun.

It was Catch-22 and you desperately wanted to get away. Sehun nudged your knee with his when your leg twitched more uncontrollably than necessary, you wanted to snap at him but you refrained because you didn’t want to raise suspicions and whether you approved of it or not, you’d have to make an effort to be patient with him from now on.

As soon as the professor dismissed the class you were ready to sprint, almost falling flat on your face while skipping down the couple steps to get out of the room, not even bothering on actually putting everything inside your bag and carrying most of your things on your arms.

That’s when you felt someone grab you by the elbow, holding you back from disappearing in a sea of students. You turned with wide eyes only to see Sehun mouthing you a ‘don’t you dare’ with a crooked eyebrow. You let out a frustrated puff of air, blowing a stray lock of hair out of your face at the same time, reluctantly staying by his side as he waited for the rest to catch up with you two.

“Are you ready for Hayoon’s party, man?” Jongin asked Chanyeol carelessly with a huge smile plastered on his face as they reached the spot where you and Sehun were already waiting. You switched the weight from one foot to the other, a reflex you had when you felt uncomfortable and unable to get away, mainly because Sehun’s grasp around your elbow felt like some sort of inescapable bear trap.

Chanyeol laughed, not with much emotion this time. “I’m not ready for the amount of preparing and post-party cleaning I will have to do but yeah, I guess. You guys will be going, right?” Chanyeol asked, scanning all the faces, trying to persuade all of you with his wide eyes and incessant blinking. You felt his eyes drop when he reached you and you felt the urge to shake Sehun’s hand away from you immediately but you refrained. Still, you felt like Chanyeol’s eyes were starting to burn off the skin where Sehun was making contact.

His eyes shot back up again, a confused crooked eyebrow adorning his forehead and you smiled to hide the fact that you were forcefully pushing down your nervousness with gulps of your own saliva mixed with air bubbles.

“Yeah, we’re going. Right?” You heard Sehun reply and from the corner of your eye, you saw him looking at you. You felt a small hint of gratitude towards him for not tugging on you or doing something of the sort because you would’ve definitely lost your façade and punched him.

You shook your head as lightly as you could as for it to go unnoticed. You looked at Sehun with inquisitive eyes and read his raised eyebrows and small smile as a ‘follow my lead’ and you sighed to your insides.

“Right”. You cleared your throat and nodded. Trying to push out a smile made out of pursed lips and regret.

“Why are you using the first-person plural, Sehun?” If you could, you would’ve facepalmed the exact moment you heard Minseok’s voice but that would’ve thrown your whole act directly into the trashcan even before it would actually start working… or whatever Sehun thought it would do for the two of you in the future.

For a split second, as Sehun scoffed, you thought he didn’t even understand what Minseok was talking about. You always thought of Minseok as a bright one and of Sehun as one of those that was hopeless and useless to worry about. But his mischievous smirk contrasted big time with Chanyeol and Jongin’s furrowed brow and you knew right then that his ‘I’m dumb, please help me’ attitude was just as fake as your professor’s hairpiece.

You were thankful that he actually seemed to understand the implications of such a technical sentence but it also hurt you a little that Chanyeol didn’t comprehend right away because that meant either you or Sehun would have to explain and you certainly weren’t mentally trained to do so just yet.

“Are you two… something?” Minseok squinted his eyes as he pointed an index finger to Sehun and then to you. You wanted to focus on his accusation; you would’ve loved to do that but from the corner of your eye, you couldn’t help to see Chanyeol’s expression changing from a confused one to a surprised one -for a couple seconds- before pursing his lips into something you didn’t know if it was an actual smile or just a different type of confusion.

“I- Uh… we’re- uh…” You stuttered, widening your eyes, nibbling on the inside on your cheek and sticking a non-existent strand of hair behind your ear just so you could get your hands busy. You wanted to clear your throat to have enough time to process a somewhat decent lie but you felt like if you did so, you would either let out a ridiculous nervous laugh or choke on your own saliva.

“We’re close. See you all at the party”. Sehun’s voice combined with those words had an effect on you that you didn’t quite know how to explain. A part of you felt relaxed that he was the one who took one for the team and spoke up in the rather uncomfortable situation but at the same time you wanted to cut off his manhood for giving such a vague and ambiguous answer.

You felt him pull you away from the group and you smiled nervously at them, waving them off as you stumbled around due to Sehun’s tight grasp around your arm and the constant need to avoid crashing onto some other student in the process. Sehun’s grasp disappeared for a brief moment before reappearing around your shoulders now and if you weren’t feeling the three sets of eyes burning a hole on your back before, you certainly were now.

“I know you probably want to kill me right now but hold it in until no one can see us”. You let out a sigh and dropped your head, wondering how many more agreements you’d end up having with Oh Sehun.

After a few minutes of walking, still with Sehun’s arm around your shoulders, which you had grown strangely accustomed to, you finally looked up at him with squinted eyes.

“You could’ve come up with another answer. We’re close. That can be interpreted in so many ways, what if they thought this is like a friends with benefits sort of thing? How gruesome is that?” You complained, making Sehun laugh loudly, slightly shaking your shoulders in response.

“I mean, we could do that if you want to”. He cackled with eyebrows raised in a teasing manner, earning a dry smack across his chest. He winced and glared at you. “Hey, at least I said something and didn’t just stand there, blabbering nonsense with my eyes wide open and a slacking jaw”. He shrugged.

“We’d have to be actual friends first in order for that to happen”. You mumbled, still feeling like there was a rain cloud pouring down specifically on you.

Sehun scoffed, dragging you along yet again when you didn’t notice the pedestrian traffic light changing to green.

“And here I was thinking that me walking you home, buying you coffee and saving you from your Chanyeol induced suffering meant we were close, I feel slightly hurt by your words”.

You couldn’t help but let out a small, discrete laugh at what he said. Yes, of course you were friends but were you going to admit to him that you actually considered you were close to each other? No, not in a million years.

“Good”. You laughed again, before you noticed, you were in front of your building and you frowned, wondering if you ever mentioned you didn’t have to go to the office today. You looked at him with yet another frown, subconsciously mimicking Chanyeol’s expression from just a few moments ago.

“You don’t have internships on Fridays unless you’re called in urgently, it’s common knowledge. Don’t look at me like that”. Sehun excused himself, letting his arm finally drop off from you.

It wasn’t common knowledge; you had made sure they didn’t know your exact schedule in advance, just in case some day you wanted to turn down one of their invites, you’d be able to use the internship card on them.

You squinted your eyes at him and just proceeded to huff and open the door. “Right. Anyhow… Go on your merry way. I guess I’ll see you at the funeral… I mean, the party”.

You weren’t paying particular attention to Sehun, you were too immersed coming up with extremely lame, not funny at all, jokes about your own suffering, so you didn’t notice him slipping right behind you and following you inside the building until you were standing in front of the elevator and almost had a heart attack when you saw him there, staring at you with a raised eyebrow and a condescending smile.

“First off, your joke was so not funny that I felt my organs clench in discomfort. Second off, I have to pick you up. Do I really have to continuously remind you that we are a team now? Because I’m really not that patient…” Sehun scoffed, ignoring the fact that you basically jumped when you noticed him there.

“I didn’t say that to make you laugh, I said that to release my own suffering in a way that wasn’t crying, you inconsiderate scum. And no, I am aware but where on the contract does it stipulate that you have to pick me up? Aren’t we pretending? Can’t we arrive separately and just pretend we got there together and that’s that? Problem solved, congratulations, here’s your badge for fake relationships?”

Ding. The elevator doors opened before you and just as Sehun had slipped into your building, following you closely from behind, he mimicked his own action, stepping inside the metal box after you. You shoved him away, not so strongly as you would’ve liked and he scoffed, for the millionth time.

“First impressions count”. He said as he rolled his eyes and followed you down the hall once the doors opened again on your floor. “What are people going to say when they notice we didn’t arrive together? The whole point is to actually make them believe, you dumb”.

You rolled your eyes as you fished out your keys from the pocket of your pants. For the amount of passive-aggressive nicknames you used on one another, you’d think you didn’t even know the other’s name.

“Fine”. You groaned, as you tossed away your keys and bag and turned around to face him with a hand still on the doorknob. “Do whatever you want, I’ll just follow your lead and get drunk”.

Sehun laughed at your comment this time as he nodded his head just once. “Then I’ll come by at around eight thirty”. He raised his eyebrows and not so sneakily looked over your shoulder to scan the insides of your humble abode. “Your place is surprisingly clean and organized for someone whose life is a giant mess”. He laughed dryly, earning a humongous eye-roll and a shove from you.

“Go away”. You said, no emotion whatsoever in your words as you practically closed the door on his face.

If the situation were to be different, you would’ve forced your best friend to come with you to the party, much like you had done to that get-together barbecue at Minseok’s place, but given the circumstances, you didn’t want to blatantly lie to her face. Guilt was starting to consume you and you weren’t aware that you could host so many unpleasant emotions all at once.

You stalled as much as you could until it was time to get ready. Unnecessarily cleaning your half empty cabinets, reorganizing your books by colors and dusting your living room over and over.

You stood under the shower for longer than you needed and you put on a face mask that you also didn’t need and was definitely going to make you tardy but hey, that was definitely the point. The longer you took getting ready meant the less amount of time you’d have to spend in a stranger’s house, celebrating the girl who indirectly broke your heart, bearing said girl and the man you liked being affectionate to one another.

Yes, you’d do whatever it took to be late. Your plan worked, indeed, but you never noticed Sehun would be such a punctual individual who was ringing your doorbell incessantly at exactly eight thirty one.

You struggled to put on some decently looking dress pants as to not greet him in only a towel wrapped around your torso. You pressed the speaker button as you fumbled to get the zipper up.

“You could’ve been a little late. Fashionably late is oh-kay”. You groaned.

“It’s eight thirty two, I am late by two whole minutes”. He scoffed, making you want to bang your head against the door but you buzzed him in either way and you unlocked the door so he wouldn’t bother you anymore.

“Come in. The door is open”. You blew a stray strand of hair out of your face as you proceeded to put on a shirt and stood in front of your mirror to do your make up, which you weren’t sure how good it was going to come out because your hands were shaking like maracas.

You heard the door open and close immediately after, but you were confused as to why you weren’t being bothered just yet.

“Touch anything, you die”. You half yelled, poking your head slightly out of the bathroom. You heard some mumbling but you didn’t bother on asking anymore, by this point, you had sort of come to terms with having him in your life.

“Easy, tiger. I’m just still baffled by how immaculate this place looks, at least at first sight”. You saw him appearing behind you from the reflection on the mirror, you crooked an eyebrow at him as he leaned against the doorframe so nonchalantly, looking like one of those rebellious fuckboys with his leather jacket and black jeans.

“You probably live in a dumpster, it’s not my fault everything in comparison looks so squeaky clean”. You’d hate to admit it but the constant banter slash arguing with Sehun could calm you down a little bit, specially when you’re feeling so distressed over Chanyeol and whatever came along with him. “No offense”.

“Offense taken”. He squinted his eyes at you, mocking a pained expression and you couldn’t hold back a laugh, shaking your head slightly as you looked down and pondered on what lipstick to wear.

You heard him walk inside the bathroom, which made you go into alert mode because how dare he? You saw his hand creeping to the counter and take one of the lipsticks lying there; you frowned, immediately looking up at him, wondering what the hell was going on inside that dufus head of his.

He handed it to you with a dead serious expression on his face. “This one makes you look decent when you wear it”.

His comment made your sudden rush of nervousness dissipate just as quickly as it had arrived, snapping the tube out of his hand and scoffing. “Jeesh, thank you. Let’s go”.

The drive to get to the house where the party was going to be at was mostly silent. You didn’t know what to talk about with him because you didn’t want to even hint at the subject of how you should act around each other once you got there.

Were you going to hold hands like a teenage couple? Was he going to follow you around? Were you supposed to introduce one another as your significant other? How were you supposed to behave? Like your normal, sarcastic self or did you have to put up a giggly, simple-minded mask on? Did you have to show any type of PDA?

You shivered at the mere thought of it.

Your mind was imploding so bad that not even the loud music coming from the speakers was enough to distract you and stop the palms of your hands from sweating so much you could fill up an entire pool, probably.

Suddenly the car came to a halt and you blinked a couple times when you realized there was people around you and a huge house in the background, fully lit and with music so loud you could hear it even through the thick windows of the vehicle you were in, a vehicle you suddenly never wanted to get out of.

“So, when you said you’d follow my lead and get drunk… Was that serious talk or just something you said to make me leave faster?” Sehun said after clearing his throat and looking at you with raised eyebrows.

You pondered for a minute. What a great question. “A little bit of both, perhaps. You see, I’m quite new at this whole fake relationship department so I really have no idea how I’m supposed to act or what I’m supposed to do”. You shrugged, crossing your arms over your chest and looking at him with a crooked eyebrow.

“It’s just like having a relationship but without actually… having one? I suppose?” The confusion was so evident in his eyes this time that you wanted to cackle and take a picture to tease him with in the future. “It’s not like I’m the expert on fake relationships either”. He huffed, yanking the key from the ignition.

Your past relationships flashed before your eyes and you shivered. You surely didn’t want to reenact a past toxic relationship of yours with Sehun. Hell, you definitely were good at making horrible decisions in the love department, weren’t you?

“Then I guess I’ll follow your lead, just don’t touch the butt”. You mumbled, opening the door and jumping onto the slightly damp street. You could hear Sehun’s chuckles as he walked around the car.

“Same goes for you. And the groin, don’t touch the groin”. You almost choked at his comment, feeling a rush of blood coming up to your cheeks just by the mere thought of touching his –or anyone’s, for that matter– groin.

You two were standing fairly far away from the front door of the house but even then, you could already see Hayoon’s luscious long hair shining under the moonlight as she laughed with a group of people you had never seen and who you probably would never relate to because they looked too happy to be normal.

“Hey”. Sehun said, voice in a deep whisper, as if there was someone who could be eavesdropping. “Let’s just get drunk and put up a show”. You looked up at him with a nervous smile and then you looked down to see him taking your hand.

It was strangely warm but you felt relieved by it because at least you could rely on him if you suffered a nervous breakdown, even if it meant he would tease you even more so than usual.

“Aye! They’re here! It was about time!” You saw Jongin coming from around the corner of the house followed by their friend Baekhyun as you two walked up the few steps, still hand in hand.

You smiled at them, suddenly hyper aware of the fact that your hands were intertwined. “You’re late, that’s so weird coming from you, man”. Baekhyun slapped Sehun’s back with a beaming smile on his face and you wondered what was it about this group of friends with their huge smiles.

“She wanted to be fashionably late, so… I don’t know…” Sehun shrugged, putting his free hand inside the pocket of his jeans. Baekhyun frowned as he looked down to take a look at your hands, looking at Jongin next, who was raising his eyebrows extremely high with a mischievous smirk on his face.

Neither of them said anything after that, they just pushed you inside so you could get drinks and greet the rest.

“Hey”. You tugged on Sehun’s hand, making him lose balance for a split second. “Just wondering, you know, in case I die and someone has to come pick up my body, where exactly are we?”

Sehun stifled a laugh as he leaned closer to you so you could hear what he was about to say.

“This is Hayoon’s house… Well, it’s technically her parent’s but they don’t live here anymore because they had business in another city so they’re letting her live here by herself now. Or something like that, I’m not sure”. Sehun explained, silently greeting random people as you waved through the decently sized crowd.

“This is… big”. You mumbled, swallowing loudly as you took in the size of her house. Clearly that was something else she had that you didn’t. She had the looks, she had the brains and apparently she had the notorious bank account as well. Fabulous.

“Yep”. Sehun said, popping the ‘p’ more than necessary. Somehow you made it to a place that looked exactly like a bar counter of sorts. Who even had a special corner for alcohol in their house? Minseok was sitting on one of the stools, happily taking sips from his beer when he spotted you coming over and he raised his eyebrows at you, exactly the way Jongin had before.

You either wanted to grab his beer and pour it on his head or just steal it and gulp it down in one go.

It startled you to feel Sehun’s hand release your own, it startled you because you didn’t know at what point in these past few minutes you had grown so accustomed to it. He walked around the small bar to get a couple of beers for you as well, you watched him because you were trying really hard to know what his plan was for tonight.

Sehun, you had come to understand, was the little brother everyone loved to hate but not really because you knew no one really despised him, they just loved annoying him and you understood that perfectly because you, also, loved to tease him and he’d do exactly the same to you, just raised to the thousandth power.

You felt Minseok’s eyes on you, staring as hard as only he could.

“What?” You asked with wide eyes as you smiled shyly at Sehun when he handed you a red cup. This was definitely the kind of situation you wanted to avoid and one of the main reasons why you declined Sehun’s offer at first but, you realized, a part of you definitely was more than desperate enough for Chanyeol’s attention as to go along with it and you were ashamed but ever so slightly curious of what the outcome may be.

You partly hated yourself for wanting Chanyeol’s affection so much that you would go to such extents. Love really made people do stupid things, didn’t it?

“Since when are you two… a thing?” Minseok inquired, still staring at you without even blinking. You laughed nervously, looking down at your lap as you toyed with a loose thread on your blouse. You felt Sehun walk to your side and swinging an arm on your shoulders.

You kept repeating that this whole thing was fake, that you and Sehun were just playing a part to get something out of this. You kept telling yourself that this was all pretend and it all had an ulterior, selfish motive but you couldn’t help your nervousness levels rise whenever he touched you in any way because you just weren’t used to having physical contact with anyone else other than your parents and your best friend.

Somehow it felt different as to when Chanyeol put his hand over your shoulders, or hugged you or nudged you playfully. When Chanyeol did it, your heart went into overdrive and you felt like your chest was going to collapse. When Chanyeol did it, you could feel the blood in your veins speeding to a maximum and your palms sweating like crazy, when he did it you had to almost physically pinch yourself as to stop you from smiling like a foolish kid at a carnival.

When Sehun did it, though, your heart didn’t race, in all reality it stopped to a halt because it made you so uncomfortable, it made you want to flee the scene. Your hands didn’t sweat, they turned ice cold and stiff and you pursed your lips because you didn’t know how to react. Because all of this was fake.

“Like a week or two, I believe”. You managed to spit out when Sehun didn’t speak up. You looked up at him as if telling him ‘well, thank you for your help, dickhead’, but you didn’t say it, neither did you react at all because you knew he couldn’t just carry the whole weight of the situation on his shoulders and fuck, did you want to punch him because of that.

He smiled at you and squeezed your shoulder; you sighed, taking a sip of your alcoholic beverage in hopes it would make the blush on your cheeks go away or in the worse case scenario, just heighten it and give it a believable excuse.

Excuses. Oh, when did your life become just a huge, messy, embarrassing excuse?

“How did you manage to keep it a secret? We see each other literally everyday and you…” Minseok said, as he squinted his eyes and pointed at Sehun with his almost empty bottle. “You live with Chanyeol, how did you not brag about this to him? You know he has a soft spot for this one”.

Sehun laughed silently, leaning closer to you and maybe he knew, maybe he didn’t, you were only sure that Minseok definitely didn’t know his words took such a toll on you. You didn’t know if this was the last thing you needed at the moment or exactly the opposite. Because hearing him say that Chanyeol had a soft spot for you made your insides burn in anticipation. You didn’t want to fuel this whole relationship ordeal but that was exactly the reason you needed to not back out and you were sure, right then and there, that you were a horrible human being for moving along with this.

“I wanted it to be a surprise”. Sehun chuckled, leaning his cheek on the top of your head and for a moment you wondered how ridiculous that must’ve looked in Minseok’s eyes.

“Either that or you didn’t want to be punched to death”. Minseok laughed, turning his attention back to his bottle and deviating the conversation onto something much more banal, like what was there to eat and drink at this party and how overboard Hayoon had gone for this.

Parties usually went like this: you get there, you get yourself some drinks and snacks to start the night, you make small talk with people that you really don’t know, you get more and more drinks until you are tipsy and the stupid games begin just when the music starts to get louder and weirder.

At this point you were right in the process of getting to a tipsy state and you had managed to not see either Hayoon or Chanyeol for the couple hours you had been there already. You didn’t know whether that was a good or a bad thing, the only good thing was that Sehun was strangely social with people and so he escaped your side from time to time, letting you be and do whatever you wanted for however long you wanted.

It was good, at first, but when he took too long you felt strangely lost and bored. Sadly, being a lonely tipsy girl on her way to getting drunk was never a good idea. From time to time some of the guys would meet you, get you another drink or just have small conversations. By this point during the night you had become quite the expert on explaining what your relationship with Sehun was.

“Oh, well, you know, it sort of just happened a couple weeks ago, we didn’t want to tell anyone so…” You blabbered when Jongin questioned you about it as he poured you a cup of cranberry vodka, which you knew it was a bad idea because you had already drank beer, rum and a bit of whisky but hey, at least you weren’t the designated driver.

Jongin nodded with a smile planted on his face as he heard you explain, yet, he never took his eyes off your drink. He handed you your cup, filled to the top. “I’m happy for you, you’re such an odd couple but I’m happy for you”. He beamed as he dragged you to the back yard, where apparently a game of beer pong was about to take place.

You felt sorry for the poor souls that were about to go through that because beer pong wasn’t the greatest of ideas, specially when everyone there was in the same precarious situation as you with God knows how many types of alcohol in their bloodstreams already.

“Hey!” You heard that high-pitched voice that made your toes curl. You turned to your left to see Hayoon skipping her way towards you with a huge, drunkish smile on her pretty face. “So glad you could make it, here to support your man?”

You frowned, not understanding what she meant for a blissful second, then you remembered: you had a boyfriend.

“Ah”. You half gasped when you realized and then you frowned because you sure weren’t the one who told her. “Who told you?” You spat out, blinking rapidly and practically submerging your nose into the reddish looking drink.

“Well, walls talk, but I just ran into Minseok and Baekhyun who were looking for you to come out here and they spilled the beans, I’m sorry”. She giggled, shrugging innocently. “But, I know it probably doesn’t mean much coming from me, someone that you barely know, but I think you two make a very nice couple. I’ve known Sehun for a while and I’ve never seen someone who can keep up with his remarks and teasing just as much as you do so I’m definitely rooting for you. Now we can have double dates”. She giggled again, skipping away from you and you sighed.

Right. Double dates. What a wonderful idea, to be stuck at a restaurant table with the man that held your affections, his girlfriend and your fake boyfriend. What an ideal scenario.

“Look who showed up. Came here you cheer up for your boyfriend?” Sehun’s voice tickled you as he leaned in to talk to your ear. You squinted your eyes and you bent your neck to look at him in the eye.

“Are you going to play?” You asked, disbelief spilling in rivers from your mouth. He couldn’t be that stupid, could he? He nodded rapidly, lips pursed into a proud smile. “You idiot, you’re the designated driver, I don’t want to die on my way home”. You hissed, slightly slapping him on the back of his head, making him laugh at your drunken concern.

“Ah, we’ll be fine. I’m a good player, don’t worry”. He said smugly, ruffling up your hair and dragging you by the hand to stand near the table. “I’ll dedicate my victory to you, darling”. He laughed. You rolled your eyes and you couldn’t help but smile anyways. However fake this was, it was nice to hear someone calling you ‘darling’, even if it was drenched in sarcasm.

You snapped your head around when you heard Hayoon’s overly sweet laugh from somewhere to your right. For the first time throughout the whole night, you felt your heart truly sink at the sight.

Chanyeol and Hayoon were walking hand in hand towards the beer pong table, his head nuzzled in the crook of her neck, her cheeks were almost as red as your vodka and you felt like puking and not really because you were inebriated. You had to force yourself to look away from them, otherwise you were going to start bawling your eyes out and look very distorted.

You looked back at Sehun, whose expression changed worringly fast and that’s when you knew, he was doomed and therefore, so were you.

“Please tell me you’re better at this than Chanyeol”. You sighed, rubbing your temple with your knuckles, forcing your alcohol levels to at least decrease to a decent point. Sehun smiled apologetically at you.

“I’ll try my best”. You sighed, closing your eyes tightly and breathing slowly.

“Sassy!” Chanyeol’s voice made your insides tremble in anticipation. You had an internal battle because you desperately wanted to see him, smile at him and pretend there was no one else there but the two of you, on the other hand, you didn’t want to see him running his hands all over Hayoon. You let out a laugh and forced yourself to look at him with a sly smile on your lips. “Ready to see how I beat his ass?”

You let out a chuckle, a sincere one this time. “Show some mercy”. You yelled back, making people around you laugh out loud.

The game started and it was okay at first, Sehun making a couple points while Chanyeol continuously failed to score. The tables turned quicker than expected, though, and you felt your heart and stomach sink down to your heels as Chanyeol scored three times in a row. Clenching your hands into tight fists, you stepped to Sehun’s side, snapping the cup from his grasp and looking up at him with pleading eyes.

He had only drunk one cup but you were already scared due to the pink tint taking over his cheeks. You gulped down the liquid in one go and threw the cup away to somewhere behind you. Half of the small crowd erupted with cheers and claps whilst the other half was booing you for interfering.

“He’s the designated driver so… I’ll drink in his behalf”. You said, scared to look at Chanyeol in the eye. Sehun was staring intently at you, his hand still stuck in the position it had been before you snapped the cup away. Chanyeol pursed his lips, eyes darting between you and Sehun and finally after a whole minute, he nodded.

“Fine but I’ll let you know, I’ve never lost a game before”. You nodded rapidly, trying to ignore the fact that you had just signed a deal with the devil, basically.

Sehun’s hand crept up to cup your jaw and your eyes widened, ignoring the catcalls here and there. You could feel Chanyeol’s eyes boring into your face. “You don’t have to, I’m fine, really”. Sehun’s expression was so serious it was scary; you immediately related that to his alcohol intake and nothing else.

“I won’t die because of you, I’m already in such a mess as is”. You laughed dryly, making him smile and nod, forcing himself to focus on the game again.

You had made a terrible decision, that was a given. Turns out Chanyeol was a master at this, even if Sehun was very good himself, Chanyeol was always one step ahead and you asked yourself why were you feeling so out of it after only nine cups of beer. In your drunken mind, that didn’t sound like a lot of alcohol but your body stated otherwise.

It came to only one cup left for each of them and you were having trouble standing up straight but you were trying to keep it together because you were scared of making a fool of yourself in front of Chanyeol, of all people.

Chanyeol missed, the crowd hissed in unison and you widened your eyes, looking up at Sehun who was already looking down at you.

“You okay?” He asked, raising his eyebrows. You nodded, gifting him a half sincere, half intoxicated smile and a thumbs up. You really were such a ridiculous person when drunk. He pursed his lips into a crooked smile and threw the ball.

You didn’t know you were holding your breath until the ball went into Chanyeol’s cup and you almost fell to the ground, losing your balance as you let out a small yelp. Sehun caught you, though, grabbing you by the waist and you remembered your own thoughts when you arrived at the party: that he’d have your back, and here he was, literally saving your ass.

Your hand gripped his shoulder, stabilizing yourself and if it weren’t for how dizzy you were, you would’ve pushed him away immediately but you were beyond loopy and you were still playing a part.

“I told you I’d win for you”. Sehun chuckled as you blinked desperately fast, trying to focus on what was happening. Sehun was merely inches away from you and you were scared to move because even the slightest of motions would have you pressing your faces together.

You gulped, trying to not pay attention to everyone staring, Chanyeol included. You didn’t want to pay attention to them because that would make you so abnormally self-conscious but at the same time, you didn’t want to focus on Sehun and his extreme proximity. You wanted to disconnect your mind and just wake up the next day with a killing hangover but in the safety of your own bed.

“I’m going to kiss you now”. Sehun whispered and confirmed all of your fears. You didn’t have a choice but to gulp and close your eyes when he leaned in closer and closer and he finally pressed his lips against yours.

Cheers erupted again but now they sounded like they were extremely far away. Sehun’s lips felt warm and soft, you never thought his venom-spilling mouth would feel so soft but it did and you were strangely glad it did, because at least it wasn’t something that made you physically want to vomit your brains out but still, this was all fake and you couldn’t help but imagining this was Chanyeol instead of Sehun.

You had thought of Chanyeol in this scenario before, there was no point in denying it anymore. You imagined his lips being as warm as a cup of chocolate in the winter, inviting, comforting and sickly sweet. A part of you felt bad for Sehun, for you thinking he was someone else, but this was the point of the whole thing. Your relationship with Sehun was fake and your heart was in Chanyeol’s hands, regardless of how weird it was to feel like Sehun’s lips were molding perfectly to yours.

Sehun’s grasp on your waist got tighter as the crowd cheered louder and you had to mentally prepare yourself to actually kiss him back and so you did.

Your lips moved in harmony for a few minutes and as much as you were scared to do so, you knew you had to make this believable, so when his tongue poked out of his mouth you granted him access and your limbs went even more numb than they already were because this whole thing was very confusing to you.

There was just so much physical contact two people could have before their minds started to go hazy.

You regained your balance and you moved away from Sehun. Half of the crowd that once was there had now dissipated to prepare for another round of beer pong between God knows who. Chanyeol was still there, staring at you, jaw slightly hanging. Hayoon was still next to him, giggling with a hand pressed to her mouth as she watched you and Sehun with wrinkles around her eyes.

You tried to take a step on your own to head back inside the house, mind still lost somewhere between Chanyeol’s fiery stare and Sehun’s soft lips, but your limbs betrayed you and you almost fell once more. Sehun grabbed your hand, intertwining your fingers and securely dragged you inside, sitting you at the living room while he went to get you some water and something to eat.

Your head felt heavy over your shoulders, you were seeing stars and your fingers felt frozen. You were staring into nothing, still confused due to what had happened before. If it was a secret that you and Sehun were an item –a fake one, but no one suspected about it– now it was all out in the open and this is where everything would actually start.

You saw someone come up and take a seat in the coffee table that sat right across from you, you had a hard time focusing your eyes on said person but when you finally figured out their features, you felt the urge to pretend you were asleep.

Chanyeol leaned forward, resting his elbows lazily atop his knees and he stared intently at you, not saying a single word, just staring. Your breath hitched, widening your eyes and trying to look at every single detail in the room except for his eyes because if you did, you would’ve melt into a puddle and left a permanent stain on Hayoon’s immaculate furniture.

“Hey”. You mumbled through gritted teeth, eyebrows raised, mocking an innocent expression, like one of a child who had broken an expensive base and was trying to pretend nothing had happened.

“You made a reckless decision out there”. Chanyeol was so serious it made you shiver. “Just so you know, in case you’re feeling more drunk than usual, that was beer mixed with bourbon”.

“Ah”. You blabbered. “So that’s why”. You weren’t sure how you were managing to form out sentences because you felt like you were having an out of body experience at the moment.

Silence fell upon you and you were starting to twitch under Chanyeol’s piercing gaze. Was he really this mad over you getting drunk? He really had to get his priorities straightened out, like per example, where was his obviously intoxicated girlfriend?

“Where d’you leave Hayoon?” You asked, eyebrows shooting up again. You knew you probably sounded like you were accusing him of something and in all reality, you were, but that’s what people say: drunk people always speak the truth.

“She’s in the bathroom with her friends, she had too much to drink. Much less than someone else I know, but still…” He pursed his lips again and you felt like going on your knees and ask for forgiveness right then and there. “Where did you leave Sehun?”

His words cut you like knives. You knew he wasn’t mad because he was jealous but more so because of your state and probably because he felt betrayed that it was kept a secret from him but it still stung.

This was the plan, right? This was the whole point, this is why you held Sehun’s hand and kissed him; you did it to get on Chanyeol’s nerves, even if it was almost a completely lost cause. This was what you wanted, then why did you feel so bad?

“He went to get me some water”. You blurted out, holding back a giggle. Why were you giggling, though? You didn’t understand.

“You and Sehun… Were you ever planning on telling me?” You didn’t know someone as soft and warm as Chanyeol could come off so cold and ruthless, especially over something so insignificant as you having a fake relationship. But he didn’t know that.

“It sort of just happened”. You pursed your lips, looking at him through your eyelashes, not really having the courage in you to keep looking at him straight in the eye.

“Sehun is not the relationship type, I just don’t want you to get hurt… I don’t want him to hurt you”. Chanyeol mumbled, looking away from you. You looked so out of it, so fragile sprawled out on the couch like that. He felt like he needed to protect you but it wasn’t his place to.

“He won’t”. Sehun’s deep voice startled you, making you jump a little when he sat on the edge of the couch next to you, handing you a cold bottle of water and a sandwich, which you gladly accepted with a coy smile.

If you would’ve been sober, you would’ve noticed the tension between them; the type of tension you couldn’t even cut with a chainsaw but you weren’t, so you just ignored everything and munched on the food he so kindly brought you.

“I don’t have anything to do here anymore so… Just get her home in one piece, will you?” Chanyeol blurted out as he stood up and tried to iron out the wrinkles on his pants with his hands.

“Of course I will”. Sehun mumbled, watching Chanyeol walk off to somewhere down the hall. You scoffed.

“I didn’t drink all of that for nothing so you better do it”. You blurted out, mindlessly as you drank almost the whole bottle. Sehun chuckled, eyes fixated on your profile as you finished eating the sandwich.

From then on, there wasn’t much you remembered. You remembered finish eating and getting up, following Sehun out of Hayoon’s house, shouting your goodbyes to Jongin along the way and then getting in his car. You remembered buckling up your seatbelt and leaning your head on the ice-cold window but after that, everything was pitch black.

You had no idea how fast you got home or how you managed to get into your apartment but once you woke up, sun shinning annoyingly through the small cracks of your blinds, you noticed you were safely tucked in, face bare of make up. You wondered how it was possible for you to do that in the state you were in.

The nausea kicked in as soon as you tried to get up to go to the bathroom and you almost collapsed on the floor because it felt unbearable to even move an inch without puking. Through squinted eyes, you saw a cup of water on your nightstand, next to a bottle of Tylenol and a yellow Post-It.

You rubbed your eyes with the heels of your hands and groaned as you popped two pills onto your mouth and swallowed them with a huge gulp of water. Your fingers danced over your nightstand until they got to the note and you had to gulp down the urge to groan again.

I got you home alive so don’t blame me if you feel like you’re dying when you wake up. In case you do, though, you can call me

It took you a couple of deep breaths to process the fact that Sehun was the one who had tucked you in and took care of while you were acting basically like a bag of mashed potatoes and then the memories hit you and they made your stomach churn in a different way.

You had kissed Oh Sehun and surprisingly enough, you didn’t completely hate it.

This is fake. You kept telling yourself. This was fake, the kiss was fake and the concern was fake as well, platonic at most. You remembered how Chanyeol seemed upset and you gave yourself a pat on the back for achieving that but besides that, everything was fake, then why was a part of you confused?

You trotted to the bathroom to splash your face with cold water in an attempt to clear your head and dissipate your uneasiness.

Everything was fake. Then, why were you remembering every detail of the kiss so vividly?

You were in dire need of a thousand espresso shots.

masterlist inflection point m.list talk to me

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gyeommark · 6 years ago

Text

inflection point . v

Chanyeol x Reader x Sehun Fake Relationsip!AU, University!AU

6.3k words

Warnings: Strong/explicit language, explicit sexual situations (in future chapters), and a lot more that you’ll catch onto along the way.

A/N: It’s been over a week, I think, so I’m sorry for that to whomever it’s reading this, I really do appreciate your patience. i hope you enjoy this chapter and also, I’m always happy to answer your questions :)

You never really understood what people meant when they said ‘life passed by in a blur’. It was a difficult concept to wrap your head around, since you had never found yourself in a situation where you could just disconnect from everything and let your mind go blank.

That was until now.

You had partially accepted the fact that the only way you could deal with, not only Chanyeol being wrapped around someone else’s finger while rubbing it on your face, but also with Sehun pushing your buttons every second of every day, was unplugging your mind from literally everything and turn into a walking potato sack of sorts.

You were sitting at one of the library workstations, trying to work on an essay while trying to come up with a decent article for your internship, which obviously was never going to work but you had to try anyways. You were too submerged in your mixed up ideas to realize you hadn’t been alone for over fifteen minutes already.

“Am I really that insignificant for you to not notice me?” You knew that voice all too well, you knew it perfectly because it haunted you in your sleep and it sent you into overdrive when you were awake and you happened to hear it.

It sounded like a lullaby your mom probably sang to you when you were a baby. You connected his voice to a peaceful moment even when it made you anxious and nervous and in dire need to run away but at the same time to stay by his side and just listen to him ramble about whatever the hell he wanted.

“What?” You mumbled, dropping your pen onto the ground and groaning because of your stupidity and lack of reflexes. “No, of course not, Chanyeol. I was just too deep into these papers”.

For the first time in a long, long, time, you weren’t trying to cover up the fact that you were thinking of him by coming up with a random excuse out of your excuses book that was around a thousand pages long by now. It made you feel at ease, in a weird way, to be sincere with Chanyeol.

“You really must be stressed over them for you to not call me Chanyeol by the way”. He raised his eyebrows at you as he pursed his lips into a crooked line. “Actually, you haven’t call me that in weeks, I’m starting to miss it”.

Your heart gave a thump and just like that you wished he hadn’t say anything. You wanted to have a serious talk with your vital organ and thoroughly threaten it to keep it down because you were afraid Chanyeol might hear it drumming against your chest, even if he was sitting across from you.

A part of you was thankful he was so oblivious to your feelings, another part was suffering in silence because of the exact same reason. If only he had picked up on them already, maybe you would be stuck on spending ninety percent of your energy to try and act nonchalant around him.

You just laughed and shook your head, mainly because you didn’t know how to respond to him.

“Whatever it is that’s stressing you out, it’ll work itself out. You have a way with words, you’ll just do that thing where you let the words flow and you basically puke literature onto those documents and they’ll come out flawless like they always do, so don’t sweat it”.

You scoffed but a part of you was confused because you never thought Chanyeol would notice that from you, especially because you never really spent time working together, specially not since Hayoon appeared and library time with him became even more rare than it already was.

“Fancy meeting you here… By yourself”. You raised your eyebrows at him, partly mocking him and repeating the words he had said a few days ago when he caught up with Sehun and yourself at the bench, partly spitting a bit of venom due to the fact that it was rare to see him alone, like Sehun had pointed out on the same day.

You couldn’t help the acidic build up that you felt in your mouth whenever you mentioned Hayoon, which was rare but it still happened from time to time. It’s not like you hated her, but you hated the situation she had brought upon you; or, in a more accurate phrasing, the situation that worsened because of her.

Chanyeol let out a laugh that you weren’t quite sure how to interpret, which frustrated you a bit, mainly because out of everyone you’ve met, he was one of the easiest people to read.

“You and Sehun really love to point it out, don’t you?” He shook his head, still with a smile adorning his face as he crossed his arms and rested them on the table, leaning forward a couple inches.

You shrugged. It’s not like you could tell him your reasons for being like that.

“She’s a very busy woman, she’s always been and I feel like I’ve gotten distanced from you guys so I’m trying to make it up”. You forced yourself to smile. Of course he felt like that, of course he was one of those considerate people who wanted to merge both his intimate relationship with his friendships, even if it meant making things complicated without him realizing it.

“Right”. You mumbled, biting the inside of your cheek as to stop yourself from saying something even ruder than before. “Busy women are something to look out for and speaking of which…” You said through gritted teeth, looking down as you put your laptop and your journal away into the confines of your bag. “I’ve got errands to run, people to meet, things to do so, see you later, Chanyeol by the way”.

You forced out yet another smile when you spoke those words, which now burned at the pit of your stomach and made your fists tremble in regret. Regret for the feelings that you weren’t able to dissipate even if you tried the hardest to do so.

It came unnoticed by you, the fact that you had stopped teasing Chanyeol with the stupid nickname with the arrival of his beloved, but when he brought it up, you couldn’t help but feel a little guilty.

Chanyeol beamed a smile in your direction, a smile as bright as the sun; you could feel it burning on you, like when you ran around the beach without sunblock protecting you as the salty water drops were absorbed by your skin.

You could feel his smile burning you leisurely, like a bonfire tickled your skin on a winter night, when you sat a bit too close to it. You could feel it exactly like that, tugging at your cheeks first and then spreading through the rest of your body; you knew it wouldn’t be beneficial for you but it still felt too satisfying to step away. And you didn’t want to step away.

Chanyeol’s smile warmed up your insides and slowly burned up your heart, pulling at every string and engraving itself in your memory and you knew then that you never wanted to be the reason why his smile would disappear.

“See you later, cowboy”. He chuckled at you and you forced yourself to cut the eye contact before you had to curl up in a fetal position to calm yourself down. You didn’t want to run away from Chanyeol, but at the end of the day, it was the only thing you were extremely good at. Running away from the things you loved the most.

Your time at the magazine was something that conflicted you dearly. You loved it because it was the only time you had to truly distract yourself from everything and anything, where you could force your mind onto thinking about something else that weren’t emotional crisis but, then again, it was the most stressful time of the day because being an adult had its ups and downs and, definitely, the constant, stinging stress was one of the worst things.

You were halfway through proofreading the article you had been stuck at for almost a week now, when your cellphone vibrated a bit too harshly for your taste. You picked up your device, unlocking it carelessly as you let out a heavy sigh. You didn’t even bother on checking who was texting you at this hour when, pretty much everyone, knew you were busy.

[Unknown number]:

You’re kindly invited to a party to celebrate I’ve finally found an internship. Hope you can join me in this new stage! I will text you more details soon.

You groaned. You didn’t know finding an internship was such a big deal and even when you didn’t have the number saved, you were having very heavy suspicions about who it might’ve been. A couple seconds later, your phone vibrated again in your hand.

[Unknown number]:

Sorry to have texted you out of the blue. It’s me, Hayoon. Found your number in Chanyeol’s phone. Hope you don’t mind the generic message I sent to literally everyone. I’d love to have you around, though.

You pinched the bridge of your nose, trying to not cry out in frustration and decided to focus all your energy onto finishing up your task, just so you could go home and drown your sorrows with junk food and a very hot shower.

You wanted the hot water to rinse off the fact that you felt she was being genuinely nice to you, maybe she was doing it because you were Chanyeol’s friend but the reason didn’t really play an important role, what mattered was that you could feel the authenticity and that was worse than anything because you wanted to hate her; you were petty like that, you wanted to hate her simply because it was easier.

You tossed your phone into your bag after putting it in silence mode and you rubbed the side of your head, silently begging your mind to stop overthinking the possible answers you could send her way.

After a couple hours of wearing off your eyesight in front of a computer screen, you finally were home, taking your shoes off and tossing away your bag after fishing up your phone out, again.

As you turned on the shower and stripped off, your mind begrudgingly reminded you that you still had a text to reply to. What could you say to not sound rude but not overly enthusiastic at the same time?

To: Hayoon

[You]:

I’ll see if I can make it, congratulations.

That was the best you could come up with and as you were about to toss your phone away and step under the scalding water, you heard it ring again. The peculiar ringtone of a dog barking let you know it was from the group chat the group of idiotic men had forcefully added you into.

You finally let out what sounded like a high-pitched cry mixed with a groan, thankfull that you were finally alone and you could express your frustration however the frick you wanted to. Especially because the one sending messages was the one, red haired man that had been driving you insane –almost literally– for months on end now.

He had sent an audio before anything else and you watched anxiously as the little bubble indicating he was typing showed up on your screen. You wanted to press play but at the same time you were scared, for whatever unknown reason.

When you finally saw a paragraph appear on your screen, you felt like combusting because why did he have to do this? You knew it meant nothing to everyone and he was just looking for constructed criticism with his trusted group of friends but the last thing you needed at the moment was to hear him sing an original song of his.

There was, little old innocent Chanyeol, asking you –and all of the guys– to tell him your thoughts about a song that he had to turn in for one of his classes and you knew he probably didn’t know what that meant for you, but you felt like imploding the second you hit play and his raspy, deep voice hit your ears with a melody as cheesy as it could get. You couldn’t help the nauseous feeling that came hand in hand with the butterflies infesting your digestive system.

You’re still awkward next to me

I want you to stay with me even after today

It’s not just a momentary feeling

I’m not greedy… It’s just there’s nothing I can do

You didn’t answer, simply because you didn’t feel like it was appropriate to express how much you loved it and, thankfully, you felt your phone vibrate as someone replied.

[Sehun]:

Corny. Go to sleep, Chanyeol

You laughed dryly at Sehun’s answer, you’d never tell him that he indirectly saved you from yet another emotional breakdown. Little did you know, that gratefulness was going to dissipate just milliseconds later.

[Sehun]:

On a scale from 1 to a billion, how much of a puddle of tears are you right now?

You scoffed, quickly texting him to fuck off before, finally, stepping under the comforting feeling of your muscles being relaxed under the water’s pressure.

You hoped next day would be better but just as you opened your eyes and saw it was barely seven in the morning, you felt your expectations shatter and you groaned, wondering why on Earth did you have to wake up this early on the only day your classes started until eleven.

You scoffed, dragging your feet to your closet and pulling down whatever combination of black clothes and dressing yourself up, not really bothering on putting up a full face of makeup.

Chanyeol’s song was stuck in your head still, tormenting you since before you went to sleep to the exact moment you opened your eyes and your consciousness fully awoke. You cursed him to your insides and then you remembered Sehun’s inappropriate and annoying text and you cursed him as well because that was the diplomatic thing to do.

You got out of your place earlier than you had in a long time. In an attempt to clear your head, you decided to go to the diner instead of going to the coffee shop because you didn’t want to run onto anyone, just in case you looked ready to kill someone.

Food wasn’t as tasty as it was at the coffee shop and the coffee wasn’t nearly as rich nor had as much body as you’d like but for the prize point, you figured, it was understandable.

You stared off onto space, trying to think of something that could take your mind off of the tall, red haired man named Chanyeol, per example how much of a stomachache would you have if you ate three greasy waffles and ten pieces of bacon from that diner or how it had been weeks and you still had yet to found out about Sehun’s girlfriend.

You smiled politely to the waitress that put your plate in front of you and filled your cup with the steaming half transparent coffee, halfway through a yawn, with a few tears rimming your eyes. Everyone had been educated on how not to play around with the food on your plate and to a certain extent –huge, might you add– you understood the importance of it because food was sacred.

But right now, unfortunately, there wasn’t so much you could do about it, it was the only thing that could mildly help you relax a little bit even when you tried to force yourself into thinking about whatever shenanigans. Tossing around your scrambled eggs around your plate was like a metaphor for life pushing and shoving you wherever it wanted, whenever it wanted to and however harsh it so desired.

You felt bad for the poor eggs, a little strange feeling might you add, and after a few minutes you let them rest, unbothered next to the half eaten waffle as you settled your hands on each side of your plate and clicking your nails onto the bar, that’s when you heard someone come in and walk up to the stool where you were sitting.

“Isn’t it too early for you to be out of your cave already?” Your eyes went as wide as your eye sockets could allow them to. You gulped, as you regretted not having taken a sip of coffee before hand because you could’ve used all the caffeine in that cup to pull you through this unexpected encounter.

How could you tell him the reason you were out and about this early in the morning was him? Because the less amount of time you spent sleeping meant less time to have his singing voice stuck in your head, therefore you wouldn’t dream of him and in consequence you were, at least, a bit more capable of handling your stress levels.

You scoffed, merely looking at him from the corner of your eye and trying not to spend too much time looking at his perfectly disheveled red mop of hair.

“It’s never too early to get food”. You smirked, taking a bite out of your waffle in an attempt to not look like a totally insane ape.

Chanyeol let out a single, very loud, laugh, startling the few customers that were in the diner. He silently signaled for you to wait a little while he went and ordered something with the waitress that was standing carelessly behind the register.

You had decided to come to the diner today to change settings, for once. You decided to come eat something here because you didn’t want to deal with the coffee shop’s familiarity and paintings that seemed to judge your every decision with their blank stares.

You came here to avoid meeting someone at least for a couple hours yet here you were, running into Chanyeol of all people. The main reason for the dark circles under your eyes. As if you had summoned him, yet again, he plopped onto the stool next to you with a cup of coffee in his hands, squinting his eyes when the bitterness of the liquid hit his taste buds.

“So, you didn’t reply last night. What did you think of my song?” He looked at you with raised eyebrows and mouth slightly pouted, looking very much like a scolded puppy. You had to look away because you felt your cheeks starting to burn and the palms of your hands starting to sweat.

“Well…” You cleared your throat, trying to come up with something as quickly as you could. “I think… it’s cute”. As soon as the words left your lips you could feel him sitting up straighter and you could see the corners of his mouth to pull upwards. What a sick, love-hate relationship you had with that smile of his.

“I mean… It’s probably a bit too cheesy for my taste, like I don’t usually listen to songs like that but it’s catchy and the lyrics are nice so it’s good. I guess… I’m not a music critic so don’t take me too seriously”. You spared him a glance, meeting his gleaming eyes and getting lost in them for a split second.

There was his bright smile again, making you melt into a puddle on the spot and not even a sarcastic text from Sehun would’ve saved you from that.

The waitress came around the corner, placing a plastic bag in front of Chanyeol, who nodded at the employee before she went back to the kitchen. He suddenly plunged onto you and you wondered if you were dreaming. You would’ve pinched yourself but it would probably look extremely weird.

You found yourself engulfed by Chanyeol’s cologne and you remembered how he used to put his arm around you so constantly and you missed those moments but at the same time you didn’t because they only made everything harder than it already was. You took a deep breath, trying to memorize it because you knew it was the only thing that, at the end, you’d have to remind you of him.

“I appreciate your opinion more than anyone else’s. Really, it means so much to me”. He murmured and his breath tickled your ear, you could feel goosebumps appearing on your arms. He let go of you, hands still placed on your shoulders and you couldn’t help but look at him with a shocked expression. PDA wasn’t your thing, whether it was with friends, family or a significant other… Actually, human contact was not your thing in general, period.

You pursed your lips into a crooked smile, quickly checking the clock that hung on the wall to your left side. “You’re late”. You mumbled. Chanyeol looked at his watch and nearly fell from the stool as he practically ran to the door.

“See you later, person”. He cackled before running out of the establishment en route to the campus and you sighed, your head nearly hitting your half empty plate as you let it fall in exhaustion.

Chanyeol was like an energy drink. When you had sips of it, he could make you feel exhilarated, senses heightened and then when he was gone, you felt dull, barely awake and functioning.

Classes went by faster than you expected them too and in all honesty you were glad about the fact that the topics discussed in them were familiar to you already, otherwise you’d find them as a complete pain in the ass.

You’d been texting your best friend back and forth over the course of the last few weeks, sadly not as constant as you would’ve liked but also, you didn’t want to worry her over your constant state of despair and you also wanted to avoid telling her about how Sehun had become your confident because of two main reasons: one being she would get jealous of you trusting someone else above her and the second one because she’d probably tease you about it.

You had been dealing with enough teasing as it was.

You were in the middle of writing another text to her as you were close to the coffee shop when you felt someone shoving your shoulder and you were ready to snap at whoever had the nerve to do such a thing, that’s when you saw Sehun with his signature accusing smile on his face and you could all but sigh heavily and shove him back.

“You never really told me how affected you were by Chanyeol’s song last night and no, I don’t take your fuck off, Sehun as a decent, acceptable reply”. He pursed his lips as he followed you into the familiar setting, the smell of coffee immediately engulfing you and relaxing you to a certain point.

“Why would I tell you that, out of all people? And why would it affect me? It’s just a song that he probably wrote about Hayoon so, whatever, I have nothing to be affected over”. You mumbled, smiling to one of the baristas as they probably were already making your order as soon as they saw you step in.

“Yeah, yeah… So, just so you know, I mean, in case you want to listen to what I have to say for once in your entire life… Hayoon has never been awkward around Chanyeol and he’s never been greedy as to wanting to have her next to him so…” He shrugged, leaning back on the bar as you waited for your drinks to be ready.

“You’re not making any sense”. You huffed, looking at him with squinted, judging eyes.

“Let me simplify my speech for your simple mind so you can understand. Those lyrics you heard, they don’t apply to their relationship. I’ve been around them enough as to know. So I’m just going to plant the curiosity seed into your mind and go on my merry way”. He smiled at you again and once your drinks were handed to you, you really had to fight back the urge to pour your boiling drink on him.

“Just one quick question… Is this going to be our designated hang out spot now?” Sehun chuckled as he followed you onto your usual table and pulled the chair next to you to sit down. You granted him a lighthearted scoff as you raised your eyebrows in his direction.

“No one designated anything. I come here because the coffee is good and also because the food is okay in quality and great in prize. You come here because you like to pester me, apparently, and may I remind you, you were the one that followed me in here just a couple minutes ago?”. Sehun nodded slowly as he listened to each and every single one of your words. You felt like you wanted to chuckle at his reaction, honestly, forgetting for a fleeting moment how frustrated he had made you. It was the first time Sehun seemed to agree with something that had come out of your mouth.

As time passed, you had realized being around Sehun could be very annoying but also very relieving when he wanted it to. It was rare to find people who could keep up with and embrace the sarcasm like he did, which was one of the reasons you had to convince yourself to make an effort to stand him when he was around. Also because he had the power to destroy you if he so desired.

And just when you were starting to feel at ease and enjoy him not fighting, for once, you felt your heart sink, take a thousand turns and settle itself in the pit of your stomach. It honestly felt as if life wanted to test you at every chance it could get. You had to do a quick recap of your entire life to make sure you didn’t have accumulated karma over something you had stupidly resolved when you were younger. You couldn’t recall, but seeing Chanyeol strolling around with his arm slung over Hayoon’s shoulder felt as your punishment for killing someone or being an accomplice to a felony of sorts.

All of the sudden, the hug he had given you earlier that day and Sehun’s words meant nothing. Everything was meaningless when you saw him being so smitten around Hayoon.

Sehun noticed you staring through the window and followed your gaze’s direction to find the reason for you looking so absent-minded. He shook his head slightly when Chanyeol turned to look inside and waved excitedly at the two of you, lightly pulling on Hayoon’s shoulder to make her wave as well, which she obliged to and smiled sweetly and shyly at you. Sehun wanted to personally go out of the shop and push the pair out of sight so you could momentarily forget about your heartache but he refrained and simply waited until the pair was out of sight to start talking again.

“I have something to run by you”. Sehun said nonchalantly, a few minutes after you saw Chanyeol and Little Miss Sunshine outside. Very considerate of him. “Seeing that you’re still very much affected by that giant idiot”.

You scoffed, one more time, adjusting on your seat as you tried to not let it show how hurt you were feeling. “You’re still affected by your ex-sweetheart, or whatever, and you don’t see me ranting on and on about it all the time, do you?” Sehun squinted at you but let it slide, for some reason, clearing his throat after putting down his frappuccino and shifting on his seat so he could face you completely,

“Like I was saying, Chanyeol is an idiot but he’s an idiot that you like and my ex-sweetheart, as you apparently enjoy calling her, is kind of a vile woman to say the least, so, last night, my own intelligence startled me as I came up with a brilliant idea after Chanyeol’s intervention on the group chat. A win/win, foolproof plan if you ask me”.

It was your turn to squint at him as you absentmindedly munched on a blueberry muffin. “That sounds implausible”.

“Wait until you hear me out before you blurt out your subjective opinions, thank you”. He groaned, you had to bite the inside of your cheek to not laugh at his evident frustration. “Without going into much detail, I was thinking about how awful it is to run into someone who blatantly hurt you and how unfair it is to see that person going around like it never happened and then your situation with Chanyeol popped into my head and then it hit me… We should date”.

If it weren’t for the fact that you had just finished swallowing your food, you were sure you would’ve choked on it and probably died then and there. Not that anyone would’ve bat an eyelash if that happened but if was a huge possibility.

“Excuse me?!” You hissed, leaning away from him with a protruding frown. “What the hell made you reach that conclusion? Out of all the people in the world, why should we date? I know rebound culture is a thing but what made you think that I would go for that with you out of everyone?”. You honestly were freaking out a little bit, not because you were nervous but because this ‘grand idea’ of his was one of the craziest, most reckless things you’ve ever heard.

“Don’t sound so eager”. He crooked an eyebrow in your direction, clearly offended by your reaction. “I want to make her see where she went wrong with me and it goes the same way with you and Chanyeol. ‘You don’t know what you’ve got until it’s gone’, ever heard of that before?” Your frown grew deeper and deeper with each word that escaped from his lips and at that moment you didn’t know if he was joking or if he was actually being a hundred percent serious.

“That sounds incredibly frivolous”. You mumbled, slowly returning to a normal sitting position and twirling around the spoon in your cup of coffee anxiously.

“I know but it is a good idea. You can make Chanyeol jealous, if Chanyeol is jealous and he realizes it, he might open his eyes and see that you two are a better match than him and Hayoon”. Sehun raised his eyebrows at you expectantly, as if he was trying to convince you with only his persistent staring rather than a well thought-out plan.

“What do you get out of all this?” You asked, still in disbelief. You still had trouble understanding why Sehun go to such extent to break up his friends’ relationship just so you could be with said friend. Not that it would ever happen, but still…

“If I get to annoy her and get under her skin, I’ll be happy” Sehun shrugged, stealing a piece of your muffin and suddenly you wanted to chop off his sneaky hand.

“I’m sorry to break it to you but this is a terrible idea. Were you drunk when you came to the conclusion that this would be bulletproof?” You asked, shaking your head in disbelief, almost laughing at how ridiculous this whole situation was becoming.

“If everything goes wrong, there’s not much to lose, anyways, since we don’t even have a dignity to lose, for starters”. Sehun sounded so confident in what he was saying that it made you cackle, not because it was hilarious but because he was being ridiculous and a part of you was disappointed that you weren’t recording this whole thing… for future reference.

“Thank you for the encouraging words, Oh Sehun. Have you ever thought about pursuing counseling as a career?” You scoffed as you disregarded the whole conversation but Sehun had a different point of view, as always.

“Think about it. At least we can have a rock solid, startup lie: Boy meets girl at a coffee shop and everything sails smoothly from there, don’t you think?” He clicked his tongue, not taking his eyes off of you.

“We didn’t even meet like that… You know, for being someone with the honey trapper reputation, you sure lack some decent persuasion skills”. You spared him a glance and chuckled when he took your comment to heart.

Sehun had a reputation, you had come to learn over the couple months of being in university and hanging out with his group of friends, who loved to blabber about their ups and downs in the love life department, and also because you heard females gushing around about how handsome and mysteriously sexy he was, apparently. In your eyes, though, Sehun was pretty much like a grown up kid with a sharp mouth and you simply couldn’t see what every other girl in campus saw on him.

“I very much so appreciate your concern over my precarious situation, Sehun, I really do, but I don’t like going around telling lies to save my ass, thank you”.

In a blink of an eye, and you didn’t understand how he sometimes could move so quickly and silently, he was leaning in close to you, staring without blinking and pretty much invading your personal space. You cleared your throat to feel like you weren’t losing control over the situation.

“Honestly, you never struck me as the rule-loving, morally-correct type of person”. He said, voice deeper than usual.

“I am not, really, but I do strive for survival and thoroughly reject stupidity… In all its forms and shapes, specially if it could get me into trouble that I can’t back down from or easily fix”.

Sehun sighed, clearly annoyed at how stubborn you were being and that rubbed him off the wrong way, particularly because he was one of those people who always managed to get what he wanted handed on a silver tray.

The bell hanging above the shop’s door announced the arrival of yet another client and in reflex, you turned to see who this person was.

Again, you were convinced that life just loved to complicate things, not just for you, but apparently for Sehun as well, who stiffened beside you and whose demeanor switched from being an annoyed kid to a serious, unmovable man who could kill someone by just staring at them. It was her, Sunhee. Skipping her way onto the table you two were sharing, only making Sehun sit up even straighter than he was already and his jaw tensing so much, you were afraid he was going to break his own teeth by the force he was applying.

“Sehunnie, long time no see!” She giggled and you really felt like puking your half eaten muffin all over her pristine clothes.

Sehun didn’t even bother to give a proper response, he just hummed and pursed his lips. The energy that was emanating from him was so intense, you were starting to feel anxious and angry as well and maybe that was starting to cloud your judgment.

“Who’s this? Girlfriend of yours? Wow, your taste in women really did change, didn’t it?” You weren’t quite sure if the anger that suddenly engulfed you was because of her condescending tone or if it was due to Sehun’s aura being so contagious with you but that was the moment you couldn’t really control your own body and you did whatever was in your power to swipe that annoying smile off her face.

You reached to put a hand on Sehun’s thigh, which surprisingly enough didn’t even make him flinch but got a reaction out of the female standing in front of you instead, which was what you were aiming for.

“Yeah, this is she and you are…? I’m sorry, I just don’t recall Sehun ever mentioning someone like you”. Your smile was so fake it started to hurt your cheeks but you pushed through for both your pride and Sehun’s sanity.

“Oh, really?” Her smile morphed from a condescending one to a rabid, almost insane one and you felt strangely content with yourself. “Well, sorry to interrupt, I have to get going. Later, Sehunnie”. She chirped, venom spilling with each and every single one of her words, metaphorically speaking, of course.

You watched her walk away and stay in line and you also watched her order one of those hyper-sweet, obviously unhealthy drinks and get out of the establishment without even sparing a glance in your direction, which made you half glad, half disappointed. Even so, your eyes were still glued to her figure as she skipped around, and eventually lost her in a crowd of people. Consequently, you felt Sehun relax under your touch and you suddenly remembered your hand was still sitting on his thigh, making you blush because since when had you become so bold?

“Thank you, girlfriend”. Sehun cackled, making you sigh in frustration as you quickly retrieved your hand from his leg and proceeded to face palm, hoping that it would somehow make you disappear from the face of the Earth.

A weird, indescribable silence fell upon the two of you as you certainly regretted your choices and Sehun kept on cackling and rejoicing about how you had caved in into his ‘strategy’.

“You can’t back up now, I don’t approve of quitters”. He threatened you with an incriminating index finger pointing at you, which you immediately swat away with pursed lips.

After a huge gulp of coffee and the heaviest sigh you have ever let out, you finally looked up at him, ready to admit defeat.

“How did we end up here, Sehun?”

He shrugged at your question, trying to not rub on your face that he had won because it was more than obvious that you were having a humongous inner crisis going on at the moment.

“Poor choices and bad judgment, I suppose”. You didn’t want to laugh but you did, not because it was funny but because Sehun had never said something as accurate as that. He laughed along with you, patting your shoulder unceremoniously.

masterlist inflection point m.list talk to me

#gyeommark writes #chanhun fanfic #chanhun fanfiction #chanhun scenarios #exo fanfic #exo fanfiction #chanyeol scenario #chanyeol scenarios #sehun scenario #sehun scenarios #chanyeol fanfic #chanyeol fanfiction #sehun fanfic #sehun fanfiction #university au #fake relationship au

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gyeommark · 6 years ago

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inflection point . I

Chanyeol x Reader x Sehun (this one will appear later on, promise) Fake Raletionship!AU, University!AU

2.6k words

Warnings: Strong/explicit language, explicit sexual situations (in future chapters), and a lot more that you’ll catch onto along the way.

A/N: As I mentioned before, this was inspired by All The Boys I Loved Before and a bunch of fake relationship!aus that I’ve read so far. It’s not intended to offend anyone or any of the sort. I also, obviously, don’t own Park Chanyeol and Oh Sehun and the rest of EXO, so there’s that.

You would’ve really appreciated it if someone had given you a heads-up about life when you start university and how fucked up it could get. If you were being a hundred percent honest about the whole thing, you would’ve loved to have the extraterrestrial ability to see the future or have any sort of power over reality, like a sitcom from the late nineties or the beginning of the 21st century, you would’ve killed to be Raven Baxter or Sabrina Spellman but life really was a bitch.

And thus, you hated life. You hated life even before it started to spiral out of control.

You were standing in the middle of the auditorium for a reason that you had yet to wrap your head upon. Weren’t cheesy welcoming ceremonies just a myth? Weren’t they supposed to be long forgotten? A thing from the eighties, maybe?

You scoffed as you crossed your arms over your chest and you tried really hard to move away from the crowd. Seeing the dean say and do such ridiculous things to ‘welcome’ the newbies as sophomores and seniors watched from the sidelines was really something you could’ve lived without, and if you were being honest, it was sort of, kind of, very much so, making you physically ill.

“Aren’t we too old for this? Are your eyes and ears bleeding as well?” You heard a deep male voice mumble from somewhere behind you. It would’ve startled you, if it weren’t for the intense, impossible to ignore, nausea you were dealing with at the moment.

You looked from the corner of your eye only to find an extremely tall man, hands tucked in his pockets, hair sporting a bright red color, standing nonchalantly close to you and who was staring at you, waiting for some kind of response.

You scoffed and crossed your arms over your chest. At least you weren’t the only one thinking this was extremely unnecessary.

He was quite a sight if you were being completely honest and it was such a shame that you weren’t able to see the future, if that were to happen, it would’ve saved the two of you a lot of trouble.

“Ah, did I get blood mixed with puke and brains on you? I apologize”. To say that you were extremely annoyed by the whole situation was an understatement and that obviously showed onto the way you decided to reply to this man.

At that moment you thought about all the life choices that brought you onto that situation and you scolded yourself for not going to the same college as your best friend. If you had done so you wouldn’t be standing here, alone but not really, bearing this embarrassment with a complete stranger and at least you could’ve been making jokes and whatnot with your life-long friend but no.

The red haired man laughed as he looked down to his feet and he shuffled a bit closer to you, making you a bit uncomfortable because… well, he was someone who you’ve never seen before and your mom clearly told you to stir away from strangers at all costs but, again, when did you ever do as you were expected?

You saw his eyes crinkling beyond belief as he tried to muffle his laugh and you cursed yourself for noticing those things about someone you had met merely minutes ago. How was it possible to be such a giant man but still have an oozing childish aura? This man proved your suspicions wrong in every single way and that was when your mind started to race.

“They’ll come off after I get the clothes to the dry-cleaner, don’t worry”. He said again, looking at you with raised eyebrows and a suppressed smile. “I’m Chanyeol, by the way”.

“Hello, Chanyeol by the way”. You smirked, not proud about your dad joke but who even cared anyways?

And that, that’s the moment, now that you looked back into it, that you should’ve known better; but life is a bitch and Chanyeol… well, Chanyeol was an annoying, charming, funny, son of a gun. Not that you knew it the moment you met him but you were going to learn that as time passed by and, because of that, you were wishing, once more, that you could’ve seen this coming.

Chanyeol scoffed, eyes shut tight as he shook his head in half disbelief, half amusement at your lame joke. He pinched the bridge of his nose with his index and thumb as he exhaled, seemingly annoyed.

After the coma-inducing, welcome speech imparted by the Dean, hundredths of freshmen scattered out of the auditorium onto the campus and you thought that you all must’ve looked like frenzy sheep running around the open field and you scoffed to yourself, temporarily forgetting that you were not walking alone.

“Thought of another dad joke? Shoot it, I wanna hear”. Chanyeol’s voice made you frown for a split second.

“My jokes are great, you don’t even know me”. You suppressed a laugh, Chanyeol smiled down at you as he nodded slowly.

“Fair point. I barely got your name even after putting up with… whatever those last forty minutes were, next to you”. You raised your eyebrows, as you tucked your hands in the back pockets of your jeans.

“Oh, forgive me, I don’t go around blabbering about myself to people I just met unlike you, Chanyeol by the way who is majoring in music, has an older sister and a small dog back in his home town”.

Chanyeol cackled, slightly pushing you with his shoulder.

“Quick question…” Chanyeol asked after clearing his throat, to which you raised an expecting eyebrow. “I don’t mean to pry or anything but why were you all alone back there? These days we come to university with at least another friend, it’s not like before when everyone parted ways”.

A part of you wanted to laugh at his stereotypes but the other side of you wanted to cry, or at least just whine, because you and your best friend weren’t together and you basically had no one in the entire university. Chanyeol was right, unfortunately, and for a split second you didn’t know how to respond or react.

You let out a chuckle, blowing a sneaky strand of hair away from your face as you ever so discretely turned away from him so that he couldn’t see the slight panic taking over your features.

“My circle of friends is not that big, really”. You chuckled and you prayed that he couldn’t see through your façade. “I’m more of a loner type, if you want to put it like that”. You said before biting the inside of your cheek and took out your cellphone to pretend the conversation didn’t hit very close to home. “I could say the same about you, honestly, why would anyone approach a completely stranger in the middle of such a weird event?”

“Oh…” Chanyeol’s monosyllabic answer only made you grew even more anxious and you desperately wanted to get home and sulk in the comfort of junk food and a video call to either your best friend or your mom, really. “My friends decided it was useless to attend the welcoming so I came on my own while they stayed home and played videogames. With that said, I guess that means you’ll have no choice but to hang out with us”.

His words caught you by surprise. Who was so trusting and open with strangers nowadays? Chanyeol, apparently. He snatched your phone out of your hand and before you could complain, or at least flinch for that matter, he managed to add himself onto your contacts before handing the device back to you.

“Pretty girl like you shouldn’t be all alone all the time, it’s not safe. Call me whenever, I’m here”. You frowned, taking your phone back from him, still barely able to process the whole thing that was developing in front of your eyes.

“Pretty girl like me can take care of herself”. To your words, Chanyeol raised his eyebrows, maybe you had come off ruder than you intended so, instantly, you tried to lessen the damage. “But thank you, Chanyeol by the way”.

He chuckled one more time. He was easily amused and you made a mental note about it.

“I was going to ask if you’d ever not call me that but I guess you won’t”. He shook his head in apparent disbelief but the sly grin on his face threw him under the bus and for a reason that you didn’t quite understand, you felt your heart grew a little bit inside of your chest, a sensation that you quickly disregarded and categorized as the beginning of nice friendship.

Without realizing it, you already were at your bus stop so you turned around to look up at the red-haired man.

“I’ll stay here”. You mumbled, quite unsure of what you were supposed to say next, as your eyes frantically looked for the bus that would take you home.

“Ok, great! Let me know when you get home and I’ll see you around, sassy one”. Chanyeol smiled down at you, showing off the dimple on his cheek. You rolled your eyes at his lame nickname but you smiled too, nonetheless.

When he took a step forward, though, you panicked one more time, widening your eyes and watching his every move closely, thinking that he couldn’t be as daring with someone he just met. A million scenarios played inside your head but when he extended his arm and ruffled up your hair, you sighed in relief.

Chanyeol smiled brightly at you one more time before continuing to go his merry way, tucking his hands in the pockets of his black jeans and you couldn’t help but fix your eyes on his back as he walked away.

There still was that strange feeling in both your chest and the pit of your stomach. You felt both uneasy but really calm at the same time and you grew frustrated because you really didn’t know the reasoning behind that.

You could’ve easily walked home but you were afraid that if you did so, Chanyeol would tag along, so you took an unnecessary five minute bus ride. Once inside your apartment, you dropped your bag somewhere near the door and you groaned, taking off your shoes and proceeding to rag your fridge to find something to munch on.

You felt your phone ring, still inside of your pocket and you saw your best friend’s name appearing on your screen. For the nth time that day, you sighed, sliding your finger across the screen to answer her call.

“Hey, you, how was your almost first day at college?” Your friend said cheerfully, a bright smile taking over her delicate features and you missed her even more than before.

She was the definition of a bright, positive person that everyone loved to be around; always sparing smiles and kind words to people, whereas you were pretty much the exact opposite and maybe that was why your friendship worked out so perfectly.

“It could’ve been avoided”. You mumbled, still eating away at the bag of chips that you found at the back of a shelf.

“That bad?” She asked as she, simultaneously, took a bite of something that looked like a grilled cheese sandwich.

“Who even does welcoming speeches anyways? Most of us are either in our twenties or close to being there so why even bother trying to cheer up a bunch of moody young adults?” You complained.

“Darling, not all people are like you but I do agree that it’s unnecessary”. Your best friend chuckled when she saw you rolling your eyes at her words and then started going off about how her first day was and how she had already clicked with not only her roommate but also a group of girls from her same major.

And god did you miss her.

“What about you? Made any new friends that you’ll change me over with?” You let out a dry laugh and then you remembered Chanyeol.

“Not really, just this one overly talkative guy but I highly doubt he’ll even come close to taking your place”. You said, nonchalantly as you took a sip of your homemade iced coffee.

“A guy huh? What’s he like? Is he cute?” She leaned in closer to the screen and you shook your head at her interest in the matter.

“He’s tall, very tall and he has red hair. His name’s Chanyeol by the way”. You snorted, still amused but also ashamed by how lame your joke was. Your best friend rolled her eyes and pinched the bridge of her nose, much like Chanyeol had done a couple hours ago.

“Tell me you didn’t used that lame dad joke on him, please”. She shook her head and you couldn’t help but laugh.

“Excuse you, miss, but hell yeah I did”. Your apparent pride on your joke only made your best friend groan, even though she still had a smile on her face, and then she proceeded to ask about every single detail about how you two met.

“So he approached you, huh? Weird… And he didn’t bail on you after your lame jokes and unnecessarily smart-ass replies, even weirder!”

You scoffed. Fake surprise was only amusing when you were the one doing it.

“Yes, he’s weird. Who even snatches someone’s phone after meeting them for like, less than an hour, if it’s not for stealing said phone?” You shook your head in disbelief, still overanalyzing your interactions of the day when your friend’s high pitched ‘what?!’ made you jump out of your skin.

“So… you like this Chanyeol guy”. She said, very sure of herself to which you could only frown, wondering how on Earth had she reached that conclusion.

“What? I never said I liked the dude, I’m just telling you about my first day at university and how bizarre it was and that I happened to meet him in the midst of all this and also about how much it freaked me out to see someone as tall as him up close”. The speed of your words honestly took you by surprise but you didn’t give it much importance.

“That means you like him”. Your best friend stated, very sure of herself, once again. You snorted.

“In what world saying that I think someone is freakishly tall automatically means I like said person?” You raised a single eyebrow and leaned back onto your couch as you waited for yet another reply from her.

“Just the fact that meeting him is the most out-standing part of your day leads me to think you have a crush-at-first-sight on this Chanyeol guy”. She smiled an arrogant smiled that she only used when she thought she knew you better than you knew yourself.

“You’re delusional”. You laughed as you shook your head and rolled your eyes. “Go to sleep, you’re starting to lose it”.

Your best friend could all but laugh and clap her hands about what she said it was the discovery of the century.

After saying your goodbyes and promising to call each other the next day, the call ended. You wrapped yourself even tighter onto your blanket and sighed, not very ecstatic about your next day and also quite confused.

Your best friend’s words had made a permanent home in the back of your mind, torturing you until you went to bed and you tried really freaking hard to convince yourself that she was wrong.

She didn’t know you better than you knew yourself, did she?

Love at first sight is definitely not a thing.

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gyeommark · 6 years ago

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inflection point . III

Chanyeol x Reader x Sehun Fake Relationsip!AU, University!AU

4k words

Warnings: Strong/explicit language, explicit sexual situations (in future chapters), and a lot more that you’ll catch onto along the way.

A/N: Not really the best at editing or anything but the storyline is moving along and I’m aware it might feel slow right now but next chapter the things will start to get spicy (not in the suggestive way, tho), Thank you all for reading ♡

It was as if your brain had blacked out during the week and a half that was filled with midterms. You weren’t even sure how you had managed to present your exams in the full-on zombie state you were in. You didn’t remember anything after that last night spent at the library with Minseok and Chanyeol studying for Corporate Communication.

You could only remember endlessly running your hands through your hair, to the point of worrying Chanyeol.

“Hey, hey, hey, it’s fine, you’re going to go bald if you keep doing that”. He said in a soothing voice, grabbing your wrist and granting you a sweet smile, a smile that didn’t help your concentration case in the slightest but had the complete opposite effect.

From the corner of your eye, you could see Minseok smiling and shaking his head and it frustrated you even more to not know what that meant but you let it slip because you literally didn’t have time to dwell on it and you wondered how on Earth were Jongin and Sehun going to ace the exam when they weren’t even bothered to study.

Surprisingly enough, they passed as well and your body had played tricks on you, relieving stress in the weirdest of ways. A cold had hit you just after you handed in your last exam, basically, so the next Monday –after practically sleeping for almost three days– you were feeling quite weak and done with life but hey, it was just your first term in college. It’d get better, right? Right?

You dragged your feet from your home to the first lecture of the day and you cursed whoever put a World History lecture at eight a.m. on a Monday morning, but you managed to get to the hall on time and, once again, you dragged your feet to a secluded seat, where you were sure you were going to be able to get at least a couple minutes of sleep.

“It’d be a shame if someone noticed you’re sleeping in the middle of a lecture”. You distantly heard a voice say, dangerously close to you and in your dazed state you were able to feel a poke on your arm, startling you a little but not enough as to make you jump in surprise.

It took you almost a minute to recognize the voice that brought you back from dreamland. As far as you were concerned, you had chosen a seat relatively secluded and away from everybody, where the teacher couldn’t spot you easily and where you could enjoy a couple minutes of the sleep you were deprived from that same morning.

Then it hit you. You made a mental note to remember the barely-there lisp and the raspy, yet soft, tone. You made a mental note to remember it because you knew, somehow, that it’d become a constant in your life; much like Chanyeol, Sehun seemed to enjoy annoying you, especially since Chanyeol officially introduced his group of friends to you.

“Get lost, Oh Sehun”. You mumbled, slightly straightening yourself on your seat and running your fingers through your messy hair, trying to conceal the fact that you were almost drooling onto your notes.

“No can do, I wish I could but I have to sit through the two hours of this lecture, just as much as you do”. He said, leaning back on his chair. You scoffed, turning away from him to face the front once more. “You look distraught”. He mumbled, eyeing you from the corner of his eye and if it were anyone else, you knew you wouldn’t have noticed him doing it but his stare was so heavy and powerful, you were sure it would’ve pierced a hole through you if you were less annoyed at him.

“How did you expect me to be on a Monday at an 8 a.m. lecture on the different theories about Ancient Migration?” You whispered, leaning slightly closer to him just so he could hear your complaints.

“Joyful and eager to acquire knowledge because this is officially the first day after the exam period torture? Maybe?” He scoffed at his own sarcasm as he also leaned in closer to you, bumping elbows in the way. You rolled your eyes when you noticed his cheeky grin.

“It is common knowledge among the community that the physical, intellectual and emotional draught post-exams lasts at least a week, so, no, Sehun, I’m neither of those things and you being sarcastic about it makes it even more unbearable”. You could hear his muffled laughter and you really wanted to smack him on the back of his head.

“Shame, and here I was considering the possibility of being actually nice to you and warn you beforehand but seeing you got up on the bitter side of bed today, I’ll refrain and let you enjoy the surprise”. Sehun chuckled, careless of who might listen to your little exchange and still eyeing you from the corner of his eye as your frown grew deeper and your uneasiness started mixing up with anxiety and frustration. Which, to be honest, didn’t seem like the perfect combination.

“What does that mean, exactly?” You hissed, flicking him on the arm.

“Sorry, lips are sealed now, you lost your chance. We’ll have to wait and see”. He finally turned to face you, only to raise his eyebrows at you, earning a huff from your part.

Silence finally settled between the two of you and that should’ve meant you were finally able to relax but the constant clicks of his retractable pencil were having the complete opposite effect. You decided to look away from him and back at the seventy-something-year-old professor, who was wiping the thin layer of sweat off of his forehead furiously before continuing rambling about the similarities and differences between ethnic groups in both the Asian and American continents.

For a split second you dwelled on whether or not to push for information with the man sitting next to you but you decided against it and figured that maybe he was just being unnecessarily cryptic to both annoy you and entertain himself, so you let it slip.

After the lecture was over, you pretty much jumped out of your seat as if it was burning your posterior and sprinted away in a weak attempt to go get yet another cup of coffee and something to eat as you waited for your next class, which you conveniently –hence the sarcasm– happened to share with not only Sehun but Chanyeol as well, and honestly pretty much the whole group.

You were too lost in your own thoughts, trying to figure out a way to avoid them in the Statistics class, to notice a tall man cutting into your path and, therefore, making you bump into his chest and Sehun, who you now knew was trailing behind you, to crash onto your back; immediately complaining about how clumsy and blind you were and how much chaos you had caused.

“Fancy meeting you here, didn’t know you shared so many classes and lectures with Sehun”. A raspy voice said as you felt a pair of big hands wrap around your arms to move you out of the way of the rest of the annoyed students.

First thing after realizing whose voice that was, you looked down to see his hands securely engulfing your arms and you had to muster all your self-control to not gulp loudly at the sight, particularly because the veins on them looked as if they were going to burst at any given moment.

How could someone with such a soft, caring personality have such a tough, intimidating looking physique? That was a question that haunted you everyday since you first met Park Chanyeol.

Chanyeol chuckled when he noticed you staring at his hands before letting you go and you could practically hear Sehun rolling his eyes to the back of his head, which honestly made you kind of, sort of, very much so, want to step on his toes.

“Sorry about that… Hey, now that we’re here…” With each passing second you wanted to be able to ignore the other tall idiot standing behind you and just pretend that you were alone with Chanyeol but his constant scoffs and snorts made it virtually impossible to do so.

You pursed your lips as Sehun shuffled on his feet and you wondered why on Earth was he still lingering around instead of fleeting the scene like he usually did.

“We were talking the other day and came to the conclusion that we should, and definitely will, do a barbecue party sort of thing to celebrate that exams are officially over and we survived so… What d’you think?” The excitement on his face made your heart flutter, even if you thought the get together was completely unnecessary.

“I think… That’s kind of cheesy but totally up to you?” You shrugged, scratching your arm in an attempt to calm yourself down.

“Great, I’ll take that as a ‘yes, I’m down for it’”. He practically yelled before jogging away. You were about to let out the breath that you didn’t know you were holding when you saw Chanyeol stop on his tracks and turn back to look at you; in response you straightened back up immediately, making Sehun laugh loudly and you honestly didn’t hold back this time and elbowed him on the stomach. He bent down almost imperceptibly and shot you a death glare.

“You’ll get to meet Hayoon! See you!” Chanyeol chirped and continued going on his merry way, like the happiest man-child on the universe.

“Hayoon?” You murmured to yourself, momentarily forgetting one more time that you were not alone.

Sehun wrapped an arm around your shoulders, almost performing a headlock on you, earning a complaint and some well-deserved pinches on his ribcage. “See, if you would’ve been nice to me earlier, I would’ve spared you this surprise which I know you don’t particularly like but you just had to be rude, hadn’t you?”

He wheezed, pulling you along with him. The triumphant smile on his face only made you want to punch him even more than you already wanted to since he interrupted your nap a little over an hour ago.

It was kind of tiring when he was right and he knew it because he also loved to rub it on your face.

Sehun had dragged you to your usual coffee shop, to sit at your usual table. The baristas there had grown so accustomed to you, especially during the exam period, that as soon as they saw you stepping in, they immediately prepared a double espresso for you and a Frappuccino for Sehun, making you let out an emotionless laugh.

“So who is Hayoon and why do I have to meet her?” You asked, brows furrowed as you took a sip and winced at the bitterness of the coffee hitting your taste buds. You let your head fall, almost hitting the table.

Sehun laid back on his seat and crooked his head to the side; you could tell he was contemplating on whether or not to give you the information, so when he smiled that mischievous smile of his that didn’t quite reach his eyes but it made them glisten, you couldn’t help but let out a groan, silently accepting your not so bright future.

“What do I win if I tell you?” He said, still smiling while nibbling on his straw.

“You get to not be killed… or kicked in the groin, which if you ask me is quite a solid offer”. It was your turn to raise your eyebrows, in an attempt to persuade him into spilling the beans. It wasn’t usual for you to beg for information but there was something about the whole situation that didn’t feel quite right.

Why would Sehun even consider ‘warning’ you about said ‘surprise’, for starters? That was highly unusual, as you’d never considered him the type to look out for you in the first place. Argue with you? Of course. Annoy you in your lectures when you were trying to concentrate? Hell yes. Buying coffee for you when he felt like you were close to collapsing? Maybe sometimes. But warning you about Chanyeol’s surprise barbecue of sorts and this Hayoon person? Very highly unlikely.

“It’s funny how you threaten to kill me almost all the time but you never really do. Are you sure you’re not secretly in love with me and you use violence as a defense mechanism?” He clicked his tongue and you really wondered how a person could be so cocky and full of himself all the time.

“Sure, got me there, Sehun, totally in love with you”. You rolled your eyes, taking yet another gulp of your cup of bitterness before basically letting yourself melt onto your seat and pretend nothing really had happened.

It’d probably sound weird saying that taking a bunch of classes and extracurriculars without Chanyeol being around to fog your head or Sehun constantly annoying you was relaxing, but in a way it was; even if it was more than you could physically handle but it was.

You appreciated the moments where you could force your thoughts to not be filled with Chanyeol, so everyday you looked forward to those classes and your internship at a local magazine.

It would’ve been lovely to say that it was all like a breath of fresh air but in reality, anyone could see that it wasn’t but it was what you needed and that’s why Minseok and Jongin preferred not to meddle onto your life choices but Sehund and Chanyeol had always been a separate matter from them.

Even if there was quite a noticeable sign on the library saying that it wasn’t a place to go to sleep, you couldn’t be bothered about the warnings, it was probably the quietest place in the entire campus and therefore, you took advantage of that, until you heard someone pull the chair next to you and plop onto it without being discrete about it.

“I’ve been looking for you everywhere”. It’d would’ve been lovely to not recognize that voice, a voice that even haunted you in your sleep and in your slumber and you weren’t quite sure if it was another one of your dreams or if he was actually there next to you.

You had your eyes open and you were holding a pen, pretending to write whatever, just so no one would kick you out of there but really, you were more asleep than you were aware; your eyes were glassy and you were sure the bags underneath them were visible (you had quite the struggle that same morning, trying to hide them with inhumane amounts of concealer), so when Chanyeol was able to get a glimpse of your face, he frowned and bit his lip so hard, you were afraid he was going to draw blood.

“Sorry”. You cleared your throat, trying to compose yourself. Why was it that you always found yourself apologizing to him because he couldn’t find you? What was it with him always looking for you when the last thing you wanted was for him to care? Actually, that was a lie, you were becoming quite the expert at lying to yourself and to others, as well.

You rubbed the remainders of sleep with the back of your hand and offered a weak smile.

Chanyeol rested his elbow on the table, letting his bag fall onto the ground with a thud. Your heart raced when he leaned closer to you and you would’ve moved away from him but you didn’t really want to.

“I don’t like what you’re doing right now”. He mumbled, voice barely audible because even when he was pretty careless about his voice volume, he still had the decency to stay relatively quiet at the library, actually, he had the decency to tiptoe around you when you were tired and sleepy and you really appreciated his efforts.

“Sleeping at the library?” You frowned and chuckled. There was something about Chanyeol that always made you come up with the most idiotic of remarks and jokes. Maybe it was the hidden, yet persistent, desire to see him laugh.

“No, dumb. You know exactly what I mean”. If you would’ve been at least a little bit more hyperaware, you were sure you would’ve been a bit taken aback by the seriousness in his voice, but alas, you weren’t, so you let it go, unconsciously.

You forced out a breathless laugh as you patted him on the shoulder, your way of saying that you were fine. Because you were fine, you were just a little bit sleepy, which wasn’t really strange if you were being honest. There were two constants in your life: sleep and food and that was that.

He grabbed your hand, stopping your light but constant pats. Your heart raced and suddenly you weren’t sleepy anymore, how could you be when your heart raced as if it was about to give out? Your hands started sweating and your stomach gave a few turns before he pulled you both up from your seats and started pulling you towards the exit.

“You need to take a rest, let’s take a rest. I’ll keep you company”. He smirked at you, looking at you from over his shoulder and you shuddered.

He had dragged you, quite almost carrying you, if you were being accurate, to a nice spot under a tree, where the sun didn’t hit directly and the air blew in a gentle breeze. He sat down and patted the spot next to him for you to take. You obliged, trying to look unfazed but in the inside, all your organs had turned to a mush of sorts. You hated the fact that you loved how that felt.

You let out a sigh when you rested your head onto the tree. You weren’t much of a nature person, never the expert when it came to camping or anything that came close to it, but you had to admit that fresh air was quite comforting, especially when you were stressed, or tired or confused, or all of those at the same time.

“I don’t know what’s been going on with you lately, other than the fact that you’re overworking yourself and we’re not even a semester into college yet, but I hope you get some sense into your head. We have literal years ahead of us, don’t over do it right now”. He mumbled as he leaned his head onto the tree as well; you could feel him barely inches away from you and you let yourself steal a glance from the corner of your eye. You wished you wouldn’t have, though, but you enjoyed looking at him when he didn’t notice, or at least he pretended he didn’t, because those moments were the ones that you were sure you’d remember for a very, very, long time.

At some point you completely drifted away, so you didn’t notice when your head slipped to rest on his shoulder, nor did you notice when the rest of the group decided to join you and munch on junk food while you were sleeping but they did and it was only when Jongin let out a sharp laugh that you regained consciousness, feeling as refreshed as if you have had a week’s worth of sleep and you didn’t want to attribute that to the fact that you were dozing off next to Chanyeol but you knew that was exactly the reason why.

You didn’t bother opening your eyes, you knew the bright lights were going to leave you momentarily blind so you just sat there, pretending to not listen and you wished you wouldn’t have.

“So, Hayoon’s finally coming here, how does it feel?” You heard Minseok ask. It was that name again, a name that you had managed to forget for the past week, ever since Sehun so kindly decided to leave you out of the loop.

“Oh, man, it’s great. I’ve missed her so much”. You never wanted to be the selfish kind of person that didn’t appreciate other’s happiness when said happiness wasn’t caused primarily by you but at that moment, you couldn’t help it.

“How’s she going to take your relationship with this one?” Sehun asked and you wanted to kick him but you refrained, still maintaining your act. You would get your revenge later on.

“Ah”. Chanyeol’s tone was a mixture between relief and concern, something difficult to pinpoint but it made you feel uneasy somehow, especially when you felt his hand on your face, patting your cheek. “They will love each other. What’s better than your girlfriend meeting your best girl friend?”

If there had been any other situation you would’ve feel warm and fuzzy and filled with literal sunshine because of the physical contact and the evident smile that coated his words but right now, right now you were feeling everything but fuzziness and warmth.

Your limbs had been very sore for a while now but at the moment, it felt as if you had no limbs to start with. They tingled for a second before going numb, a knot formed in your throat and you suddenly felt like puking, the sort of nausea that it’s annoying because you want to vomit to get rid of it but you can’t actually do it and so you’re stuck with the feeling.

You decided you didn’t want to be there anymore but you weren’t quite sure of what to do to get away from the man that had your heart on the palm of his hand and was squeezing the life out of it without really noticing he was doing so.

You straightened yourself up, slowly but surely, trying to act as if you had just woken up. They all raised his eyebrows at you, maybe it had been poor timing from your part, maybe it was just too much of a coincidence for you to ‘wake up’ exactly then, maybe you had thrown yourself under the bus but you honestly didn’t care.

“Oh”. You mumbled, widening your eyes a little bit and rubbing your neck as you feigned innocence. “Hi”.

“We we’re just talking about how Chanyeol’s sweetheart is coming back and you’ll finally meet her”. Jongin said, picking at the grass beneath his hands. You knew he didn’t mean for his comment to hurt you, you knew he probably wasn’t aware of the way you were starting to feel towards Chanyeol, you knew he didn’t mean it at all but, still, the pang in your chest at the sound of his words almost made it impossible to breathe but you pushed through it and put up a smile on your face.

Because that was what you did, fake everything, and it was probably the only thing you were truly good at.

“Great”. You sighed, standing up slowly. They all looked at you as you shook away the loose grass that stuck to your jeans and you pushed your hair behind your ears. “I have work to do, so I’ll see you later”.

Lame excuses were just great, amazing, really, and the best part about them was that nobody really questioned them if you said them quickly enough before walking away.

Life was a bitch and you sort of had forgotten how it felt when your heart ached in either sadness or anger or both. It had been a long time –sort of, but not really– since you have liked someone this way.

You had forgotten how your vital organ clenched when you imagined that person laughing about what someone else said, or when the wrinkles around his eyes and the dimple on his cheek appeared because he was laughing way too hard or talking way too enthusiastically.

Life sucked major balls and you hated that you had found yourself falling deeper and deeper and you didn’t even know the exact moment when your heart had decided to be biased towards a strange tall man named Park Chanyeol but it had and now, as always, your timing had been off because Park Chanyeol had never been yours to start with.

masterlist inflection point m.list

#gyeommark writes #inflection point #chanhun scenarios #chanyeol scenarios #chanyeol fic #chanyeol fanfic #chanhun fanfic #sehun scenarios #sehun fic #sehun fanfic #sehun fanfiction #exo scenarios #exo fanfiction #exo fic #exo fanfic #fake relationship au #university au

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gyeommark · 6 years ago

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inflection point

Fake Relationship!AU University!AU Chanyeol x Reader x Sehun

Bad luck, poor choices and awful judgement. That was your life summarized in a short sentence and even more so than before, you were sure that life had the worst ways of testing you. How exactly did you end up stuck between the two, pretty much literally? You scolded yourself when you realized you had a crush on him and then you wanted to disappear into an abyss when you agreed to do the stupidest thing in the world with the other one.

[Inspired by ATBILB and pretty much all the fake relationship!AUs I’ve ever read in my 23 years of being alive].

c h a p t e r o n e masterlist

#gyeommark writes #exo scenarios #chanhun scenarios #chanyeol scenarios #sehun scenarios #chanyeol fic #sehun fic #exo fic #exo fanfic #chanyeol fanfic #sehun fanfic #chanhun fanfic #smut #fluff #angst #exo fanfiction #chanyeol fanfiction #sehun fanfiction

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gyeommark · 6 years ago

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inflection point . II

Chanyeol x Reader x Sehun Fake Relationsip!AU, University!AU

3.8k words

Warnings: Strong/explicit language, explicit sexual situations (in future chapters), and a lot more that you’ll catch onto along the way.

A/N: As I’ve said before, this was inspired by movies and a bunch of fanfictions. Also, I appreciate feedback, of course. My ask box is always open for you to come and chill with me while I write/edit.

As you had predicted, maybe even predisposed yourself, getting out of bed to go to class was harder than ever before and that was saying much, since high school is not the merriest of moments in people’s lives.

You momentarily blinded yourself with your phone’s bright screen to turn off the alarm when you noticed you had around five or so text messages. Your barely awake mind had trouble figuring out who might’ve texted you with such urgency.

You groaned as you sat up straight and rubbed your eyes before unlocking your phone and opening the messages app, you had to stifle a laugh when you read the name at the top of the list.

[Chanyeol by the way]: “I’m going to go ahead and assume you got home safe and sound even though you didn’t text me” [Chanyeol by the way]: “But seriously, did you?”

[Chanyeol by the way]: “Am I being paranoid?” [Chanyeol by the way]: “Do you even remember who I am, though? That’s the real question here…” [Chanyeol by the way]: “I even saved myself as Chanyeol by the way to amuse you. See you tomorrow, then”

The last thing you wanted to wake up to was the ever so persistent confusion about your first day at college, followed by the perturbing words from your best friend that you thought would disappear from your brain after a well deserved night of sleep and yet, everything came crashing back to you because of the texts he had sent.

Would it be rude if you didn’t answer though? Would he think you were lame if you apologized before saying anything else?

You scoffed and you decided to dwell over it while you took a shower and got ready to head out.

The hot water did its job on relaxing your muscles and refreshing your skin but it didn’t really help with the mess that was going on inside your head.

You. Don’t. Like. Chanyeol. You kept repeating over and over again; when you washed your hair furiously, trying to forget his impromptu display of affection by ruffling it the day before; when you applied moisturizer to your face and you remembered his deep dimple; when you unlocked your phone to change the song and you remembered that you still hadn’t answered his text.

“Damn it”. You whined, finally mustering up some sort of conviction to reply.

[You]: “Oops?”

You almost smacked yourself on the head after you hit send without giving it more thought. Oops?! What kind of reply was oops?.

[You]: “Fell asleep immediately after getting home. Sorry. Have a good day”

It seemed as if your brain was not functioning as it was supposed to and you really worried about your performance on your official first day full of classes and lectures and whatnot but would that little white lie really hurt him? You seriously doubted it.

You didn’t bother checking your phone much after that because you were sure you had made a fool of yourself, but given the amount time that you had spent dwelling over Chanyeol related things, you decided you needed a well deserved break and you sprinted out of your home onto campus, blasting music full volume through your earphones to try and muffle the very loud thoughts that persisted in the back of your head.

After ten minutes or so of walking around in search of your first class, you finally found your destination and walked inside the room gasping for air but also relieved that you had made it in before the professor.

You scanned the room, looking for a decent seat and that’s when you saw the bright red head in the middle of the crowd. You cursed through gritted teeth, as you tried to hide yourself behind a curtain of your own hair and walked to a seat that was neither at the front nor at the very back, hoping that he hadn’t spotted you.

“Hey!” You heard an unfortunate deep, raspy voice yell and you wanted to melt. You pursed your lips. Maybe if you pretended you couldn’t hear, he would leave you alone. “Hey! Sassy one!” The voice insisted and when you heard some laughter behind you, you really wanted to get up and flee.

“Hi, Chanyeol by the way, hello”. You said, voice barely audible. You only caved in to say hi because you didn’t want him drawing any more attention to you, which with his yelling, he had already started to do, in the first place. You slowly turned to look over your shoulder to find him hanging out with a couple other guys, which were also surprisingly decent looking, if you were being honest.

Was it really too much to ask to have some smooth sailing, uneventful days at university where you could just go unnoticed and unbothered until you got back home?

He raised his eyebrows and smiled as he cheerfully waved at you, ignoring the snorts of his friends when they heard the way you had called him.

“What are you doing in a Corporate Communications class?” Chanyeol whispered-yelled, leaning over his seat, his eyebrows still raised so high that it caused wrinkles to form on his forehead. in reflex, you leaned away from him, even if he was nowhere near bursting your personal space bubble.

“I’m a journalism major, Chanyeol, I pretty much have to take at least one class about every subject you can imagine”. You sighed, crooking an eyebrow. His mouth open, as if saying ‘ah’ and he nodded in understanding; you had never felt as relieved to see a professor walk in into a classroom more than you did so in that moment.

You took in a deep breath and closed your eyes, trying to relax again.

After around half an hour or so, you felt your phone vibrate in your jacket pocket and if it weren’t for the fact that this was basically an introduction for the course and the professor wasn’t giving out the most relevant of information, you decided to check it.

[Chanyeol by the way]: “Fancy meeting you here. On a scale from one to ten, how dead are you feeling right now?”

You snorted and you rubbed your eyes, trying to not turn around and throw something at him. You didn’t laugh because you found it genuinely funny but because you could clearly picture him wiggling his eyebrows at you.

[You]: “Probably like a billion but still… shut up and pay attention”.

You were quite proud of how discrete you could be when you needed to, like when you went to a family meeting and had to pretend you didn’t want to burn all of the people there at the stake or like when you went to high school parties and you had to pretend you weren’t hammered as fuck when you got back home at three in the morning and then when you woke up you had to pretend that your hangover wasn’t killing you and you didn’t want to barf at every second of every minute of the entire day... But Chanyeol… Apparently Chanyeol didn’t even know the word ‘discretion’ existed.

You heard him let out a dry cackle and complain immediately after, hissing sharply and you could all but assume one of his friends had physically attacked him to keep him quiet.

The constant bouncing of your leg was a sign that your stress levels were increasing by the minute and you knew you weren’t stressed because of the class, at all, but because you could feel at least a few set of eyes burning a hole in the back of your head, so when the professor shut close his computer, you hurried to pack up your belongings and get out of there.

There was only so much you could do in your free time between classes. It’s not like you could go back to your place and kill time because you were sure you’d probably curl up and sleep and lose track of literally everything, so you opted for the latter, which was walk around until you found a nice diner or a coffee shop to sit down at and read, or write or watch idiotic videos on your cellphone.

After almost twenty minutes or so of walking without a fixed destination in mind, you came across a picturesque coffee shop. The furniture was all mismatched and there were classic paintings on the walls, some Van Goghs, some Munchs and you couldn’t help but smile when you spotted Boticelli’s The Birth of Venus hanging on the furthest wall. In that instant you claimed the table under that painting as your own.

You were ridiculous like that, your mother had always made fun of your random displays of obsessive compulsive disorder.

A waiter came around a few minutes after you had sat down to take your order and you were ecstatic about the prizes they had; there’s only so much money a college student can have. You ordered a latte and you gave yourself a moment to relax, trying to forget about the stress of being stuck in a classroom with the person that was making a mess out of your logical train of thought.

It was as if he was a telepath of sorts because anytime your mind trailed off to analyze the whole situation your friend had brought up about you liking Chanyeol, your phone chirped and you groaned, seeing his name flashing on the screen.

Who even made calls nowadays when you could text or send voice messages? What a weirdo.

“You disappeared”. His cheerful tone of voice wasn’t as happy and bubbly and you asked yourself why would he care if you disappeared or not. It wasn’t like you were the closest of friends. You had literally just met the day before.

“I had to eat something”. You replied, with sort of a dry tone and you were aware. It’s not like it was your intention to come off as uninterested or hostile, it was just that you didn’t quite know how to act or talk to him.

“Jesus, I’m hungry too, we could’ve tagged along. Selfish”. You couldn’t help the giggle that escaped your lips at his childish answer.

“Again, sorry. Like I said before, I’m not much of a people person”. You excused yourself, taking a sip of your latte to ease the tension that came with having a conversation with Chanyeol.

“And like I said before, that will change. Enjoy your food without me, selfish human”. You disregarded his attempt of a guilt inducing answer with a ‘yeah, right’.

Why did Chanyeol have the ability to make you smile even when there really wasn’t a particular reason to do so? Why did your brain turn into mush with the bare thought of him smiling at you?

You frowned as you typed in a quick text to your best friend.

[You]: “What did you mean about me liking Chanyeol?”

A couple minutes later your phone vibrated again, interrupting the video of some bloopers you had come across while scrolling through your feed.

[bff]: “I love it when you admit defeat”.

You didn’t know whether to laugh or cry at your best friend’s reply, more accurately, about the fact that she was right.

Time passed by and you were grateful that your next couple classes for the day were exclusively for journalism majors, there was no way in hell you would bump into Chanyeol at your Photojournalism class or at the Mass Media Law lecture so, finally you were able to pretend everything was completely fine and you were strolling through a meadow, even if it was just for a little bit, and focus on something other than him.

To say that you had mastered the art of sneaking away was an understatement. For the next couple weeks you managed to figure out his schedule and his habits… Not in a stalker sort of way but in an I don’t want to see you because it freaks me the fuck out and confuses me even more sort of way.

You even made an effort to set your alarm fifteen minutes earlier, just so you could sneak in before he did and practically hide under your seat until you were sure he was in there and not able to see you, since you had practically made a home out of the last few rows in the lecture hall.

But of course, the downfall of it all was that sneaking and running around was obviously going to have its toll on you. Along with that, ignoring someone’s texts could only go for so long before, one: they would just stop bothering and forgot you existed or, two: pestering you even more so and turning into full on detective mode until they got an answer out of you.

You really prayed that with Chanyeol it wouldn’t be the latter. But then again, you didn’t really know him, your construction on Chanyeol was based solely on the first day you met, the second day when you had ran onto him at that class and the couple dozens of texts he had sent your way.

Your capability of reading people could only go as far and you weren’t even close to being a pshychoanalyst. Maybe Chanyeol was just being a nice, decent human being by being friendly towards you, maybe he was even doing it out of feeling sorry for the poor girl that was all alone in this huge campus.

Maybe, you tried to convince yourself, you didn’t mean anything to Chanyeol.

You hadn’t noticed your frown growing considerably bigger as you dealt with yet another inner crisis. It was only when a breeze hit you and a shiver ran down your spine that you remembered you were sitting on a bench at the quad, in plain sight. You remembered, as well, that you had to run away from there if you didn’t want to encounter Park Chanyeol but your legs were too sore, your head was starting to hurt and your stomach complained loudly about the lack of food being delivered to it in an extended period of time.

Your best friend’s words resonated inside of your head. You can’t run away forever, either accept you have a crush on him and deal with it or just try to move on from him and start seeing him as just a friend, an acquaintance even.

If only you’d listen to what people told you.

You felt someone sit down next to you and you looked out from the corner of your eye. Gulping down, trying to compose yourself.

“Ah, shit”. You murmured under your breath at the sight of Chanyeol next to you and his friends sitting around you as well.

“Hello, stranger. For a moment I thought you had died”. He chuckled for an instant before turning dead serious and frowning slightly, as if he had realized joking about death wasn’t funny at all. You scrunched up your nose, coming to terms with the fact that your plan had crumbled down in merely a matter of seconds.

Dying would’ve been nice. Better, actually. You thought before forcing out a smile and shrugging in an uninterested manner.

“We saw you in that Communication class didn’t we?” One of his friends spoke up. His hair was as black as it could get, styled perfectly and accentuating his sharp features. You didn’t know his name, of course, but you could tell right away that he was probably the smartest of the bunch, or, at least, the more mature one. “Oh, sorry, I’m Minseok. Chanyeol has been complaining a lot lately about not seeing ‘the sassy one’ around, I assumed that was you”.

You felt a warm wave creeping up from your chest to your face and you knew exactly what that meant, unfortunately. You couldn’t let yourself blush, at least not in front of everyone when they were staring intently at you, waiting for a reply.

Chanyeol complained, almost kicking his friend to which the other two laughed. You forced out a smile as you tried to shake off the blush that threatened to show.

“This is Minseok, he’s usually well-mannered, excuse him. These other two idiots are Sehun and Jongin”. Chanyeol pointed to the other two males who laid carelessly on the grass in front of you and you wondered where they were from and what exactly did they eat to become so tall. Immediately, you wanted to protect Minseok, who looked extremely tiny next to them.

Jongin greeted you happily, smiling from ear to ear, whereas Sehun could only be bothered to nod in your direction, which almost made you scoff, so you only nodded at him as well.

They started chatting cheerfully and it almost felt like they were ignoring you, except for when something funny was said and either Chanyeol shook you by the shoulder to get a reaction out of you or Jongin raised his eyebrows at you.

Really, you would’ve preferred to not be involved with them at all but a part of you felt nice and warm with them around. Especially when you stopped sneaking around and you noticed that you actually shared more than a couple classes with them. It was nice to have company; someone to sit next to you and say idiotic things in boring lectures or someone to go to the coffee shop or the library with when you needed to work on an essay.

Company was nice and yes, you were a loner, but even the loneliest of people enjoyed having someone around from time to time. Almost like a pet but not quite.

As you exited your Creative Writing class, the last one for the day, it felt quite strange to not be yelled at by someone for you to wait for them, usually Chanyeol, and you took that as your chance to take a deep breath and try to clear up your mind, if that was even possible, which you highly doubted.

Before your knew it, almost two months in college had gone by and you had found yourself not only with a very eclectic group of friends but also with a crush that you had yet to own up to. Except for your best friend, who was miles away from you and who didn’t get to experience your strange life with you, no one really knew you had a thing for Park Chanyeol and, if you were being a thousandth percent truthful, you hadn’t completely come to terms with it either.

Admitting your own feelings had always been a difficulty ever since you could remember, so, you admitting that you had a crush on someone was as huge of a moment as when Jesus resurrected, quite groundbreaking.

But, in reality, there was no way you could deny it anymore.

You liked Park Chanyeol and you liked when he laughed out loud and clapped his hands, much like a seal, or hit whoever was closest to him and you felt giddy inside when he refrained hitting you and only rested his head on your shoulder as he squeezed his eyes shut beyond belief.

Your heart felt warm when he stared at you while you were talking; you liked it when he waited for you to finish a class so you could go get something to eat or drink; you loved it (secretly, of course), when you sat around together and he, so nonchalantly, put his arm around the backrest of your chair and shook you slightly to either make you laugh or force you to take his side in one of the many arguments they had amongst themselves.

But you hated the way you couldn’t seem to take him out of your head, like when you saw a stupid movie on the TV that made you laugh and you thought about how much he would’ve laughed over it, he’d laugh so hard he’d cry and his dimple would be on full display.

You hated the way you always expected to see at least one text from him in your cellphone either in the morning to wake you up and tell you you were running late or at night to wish you goodnight and remember you it was your turn to buy the coffees for the group.

It was a love-hate relationship… A one-sided love-hate relationship and you knew there couldn’t be anything that was more ridiculous than that.

You were halfway to your place when you heard someone yelling and running behind you, you got goosebumps and you thought ‘well, this is it for me’ quite a pessimistic thought, but you were a woman walking around in the dark, all alone.

“What are you doing walking around alone like that, you’re going to get killed or something”. You squeezed your eyes shut, trying to shake off the fear from you when you saw one of the four men jogging to catch up with you. Out of all of them, you never expected Sehun to be the one to walk with you at night.

“That was what I was aiming for and you just ruined my plans, thank you”. You said, sarcastically, making Sehun roll his eyes and snort.

Out of the four, Sehun was probably the one that was more similar to you, in many ways. He was sarcastic and sharp-tongued, he stayed quiet most of the time and when he didn’t, he’d always come up with witty replies. But being very similar also came with a lot of arguments because you never admitted your wrongs and neither did he.

You could bicker on for days on end and you’d never reach an agreement, so seeing him jogging to catch up with you was pretty shocking.

“Next time I see you walking around, obviously daydreaming and not even paying attention to the cars speeding next to you, I’ll let you be and die”. He huffed, putting his hands in the pockets of his leather jacket.

For the most part, even if you two fought without any particular reason, there was an unspoken statement about the fact that you did care for the other.

“You see, if that would get me out of the mid-terms then I’m down, I won’t even haunt you if you let me die”. You mumbled, looking for your keys in the front pocket of your bag, as you were now only a couple blocks away from your apartment.

“You got yourself a deal”. He wheezed.

When you reached the front door of your building, before you could say anything to Sehun, he patted your back with more force than needed almost knocking the air out of your lungs.

“See you tomorrow”. He raised his eyebrows at you and you just pursed your lips into a weak attempt of a smile to send him on his merry way.

Between the stress of the mid-terms, the emotional exhaustion brought by Park Chanyeol and your crazy sleep schedules, you really wanted to go to sleep and not wake up, even though you were aware you were just being overly dramatic.

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