#guess I was a sucker for thinking I'd get more hate anons

[sexynbgaming]

Reading your discussion about transandrophobia I can't help but feel that you might actually be granting too much to the other side. Whipping Girl did not establish a "theory" of transmisogyny, it merely coined a name for a specific kind of stigma. The "theory" of transmisogyny that has sprung up in its shadow does not actually have good explanatory power, and at times it borders on "radical feminism but for trans women this time." The concept of transandrophobia is not deficient for not having this shadow.

You have some great points here. I'll admit to not reading whipping girl so I can't comment on how scholarly/rigorous it was or not. Regardless of its rigor it has added key terminology with at least a general definition to part of the overall culture. This was great for shining a light onto the specific struggles of trans women and really has lead to more fully rigorous, scholarly articles being published. A couple examples I gathered quickly include: a generic look at transmisogyny and an application of transmisogyny to state legislature (not to claim these articles are perfects but simply more has been discussed because of the book).

I believe transmisogyny does have some good explanatory power, but as I said it's also young so still not too much. Most of it's power comes from applying feminism and misogyny frameworks to the specifics of trans women's struggles. Because feminism and misogyny are so fleshed out it's easy to build a fully complete thread such as "Trans women get more callout posts because of the fusion of 'queer man=predator' conservative thinking and how women are held to a higher moral standard then men". Transandrophobia theory is unfortunately at a distinct developmental disadvantage here because misandry (whether you believe it exists or not) is simply less studied.

I do want to be careful not to conflate transmisogyny theory with the people who use the term transmisogyny the most on tumblr. I have also seen many people use transmisogyny in their trans-women-inclusive radical feminism but this is no different from a usual terf using misogyny in their arguments.

I truly agree with your idea "the concept of transandrophobia is not deficient ..." not only in your original reasoning but also because both transandrophobia and transmisogyny are just far too new to judge. No criticism should be used to discount either of these theories as a whole because no one knows what either theory is fully yet.

[carlos-in-glasses]

hiya! i hope you're still down to answering asks about That Line, sorry if you're not, do feel free to delete this too!

i think my initial reaction to that line was like a sucker punch to the gut with the way it was setup, i.e. the framing, him standing next to TK, and TK looking at him after he'd said that line. i was so pissed and i'm still pissed about it now. in no way is that fair to TK for him to have said that, no matter how angry or hurt he is. i'm not saying right/wrong bc it's never as transparent as that, i'm coming from pov of an audience and having witness both sides of the argument. yes, tk crossed a boundary when he visited iris even though both him and carlos had agreed not to, and i understand why carlos would react the way that it did. i hated it, but i don't really wanna get into it now. which brings me to,

i think, or at least i'd hoped that this might be setting up for carlos' character arc where – you'd previously mentioned that 403 is essentially confronting his past before taking that next step into his future with carlos, and i agree! – we'll be able to see carlos realising that he needs to be able to learn how to let go of the unfounded guilt he had towards this whole mess (i.e. marriage, iris getting kidnapped), and iris would swoop in and be like, 'hey, i'm no longer your legal responsibility now, and i am no longer your responsibility, period. i can take care of myself, and i'm sorry for the way things were but we're still best friends and i still love you. you can let go of this now.' something something about him having to confront and address things rather than chalk things up until he absolutely had to confront it, in order to move forward in his life, bc atp its at a standstill. and it's kind of like a full circle moment for him to realise that he didn't need to, and will never need to take on this weight and responsibility all by himself and pushing away the ones he loves in the meantime (i.e. TK 😭😭💗💗💓), when there's someone so willingly to take on this weight with him (back to my boy TK). i know i'm dreaming big but if i had to cope with shitty writing choices from a professional who does this for a living, i can pretty much read between the lines and interpret it however i want to.

which brings us back to That Line, so if the writers are willing to explore that route with carlos, it would make much more sense in relation to him implying that it was the marriage, and TK having been drowning in his own guilt and misery, misunderstood and took that to mean that carlos had meant with him (imagine the angst we would get from this if it was addressed on screen i'll cry).

i know i'm putting myself through the mental gymnastics and i'm pretty sure i'm 100% wrong in this. atp i'm still pissed at everything and especially carlos (i know its warranted but i'm still pissed and that's ok bc i'll get over it), but this is a headcanon i'd like to believe in until we have more context in 404 IF (and that's a big fat if) it ever gets addressed. if its just a result of a poor writing choice, i'm more than willing to pretend it never existed too.

thank u for reading, sorry it's this long!

Hello anon! Very happy to discuss, no worries at all. <3

I think 4x03 was a hard pill to swallow after how easily 4x02 went down. We've never seen Carlos shut out TK like this, even in the ice storm (he was mad but he was there. Although I should note I did not see the ice storm arc play out as it aired, so my experience of it is different to those who did watch at the time), but we've seen him be 4x02 Carlos before. The contrast is extreme after last week's squishiness. It's implied he 'doesn't like TK right now' immediately after being madly in love. It's new for us to get to grips with, how he goes from one to the other so quickly. I share your sucker-punch feeling and I still have it now to an extent – even after having talked myself into thinking Carlos was referring to himself and Iris. I guess I wish I didn’t have to *think* that, and rather I could just know. I’m happy for plenty of things to be left up to my interpretation as a viewer, whatever I’m watching, but a lack of clarity around something like this line doesn’t sit well with me. I have a very nervous disposition!

You’re right, the framing and the whole vibe made it seem like a super passive-aggressive reference to his own relationship, yet as I mentioned it’s total whiplash for the man who’d so recently comforted TK on the couch to say such a thing. If he *was* making a reference to being super displeased with TK to the extent of suddenly finding their relationship bad (just writing this reinforces to me how it makes no sense…) then the punishment does not fit the crime. Especially as Carlos is canon-aware that TK and Iris hugged rather than had a falling out.

Essentially, I share your headcanon and would really like to see them address this comment so we and TK aren’t left in the dark. There are actually so many good things that can come out of this arc, even if the writing itself leaves us with neon question marks blinking over our heads. By trying to ignore his past and leave it behind him, Carlos has inadvertently looped it tightly with his present and now he has to unpick it from this point. That’s fascinating! I want to see it. This is contrasted nicely with TK, I think, who in some ways ‘left the past behind’ when Owen brought him to Austin, but has been doing the hard work to face it and overcome it ever since, by going N.A meetings, taking his sobriety seriously, talking to the crew about it and his relapse, and finding an incredible man who opened up his heart again. Carlos is on a similar journey, in his own way, he just has to stop resisting and pretending and lying. I love Carlos so much – and it’s because I love him that I care. That lad needs to apologise to his fiancé. TK needs to understand that Carlos’ reaction was due to 99 problems and TK was maybe 1-ish (due to a transgression that was actually nbd). And they are going to be okay.

[sehodreamsthoughts]

HELP okay i just read the whole thing. im super impatient so i was reading kinda quick at parts but just holy fuck, yeah i was like babygirl noo!!!! and like, idk there were some parts that had me covering my hand with my mouth like omg😱😱 but jeezz… wow… i am a sucker for everything involved in that fic… it was almost too immersive i was like legitimately concerned for reader at times, but yeah im a sucker for toxicity in fics and the trope of like… making them watch🤭🤭

with yeosang.. so wooyoung and yeosang are really close friends irl so i also could kinda see them in a competitive thing.. with reader… soft dom yeosang, mean dom wooyoung type of deal… i can’t be more specific than that atm… im still trying to brainstorm. on his own, im kind of just thinking of smth cute like friends to lovers or childhood friends or smth cuz he is just so sweet i can’t rly see him being all that mean?

- 🥟 anon

I KNOW, I LIKED IT SO MUCH BUT SOMETIMES I WAS BEGGING IN MY INSIDES PLEASE GIRL STOPPPP

The scene in which Jay, Sunghoon and Jake were inside her room was so hot???? AND THEY WERE JUST TALKING I CAN'T. It was like the dream, to have those three guys be so desperate, and I loved that each of them had their own touch, Jay was bold and straightforward while Sunghoon was less invasive and Jake was simply a simp, and everybody knows, I ADORE SIMPS.

Jake sending unsolicited dick pictures was so real too 😭, acting all pathetic to bag the girl but being a complete pervert 😭, oh god but did I hate when they shared the nudes, I was begging on my insides please girl stop you're not fooling no one you know those three are ASSHOLES!

And I didn't like much how the envy for the sister was represented but not because it was bad, I'd have simply enjoyed more if there had been any reason to not love her because the sister literally opened the door of her house, gave her a room and trusted her to be with her bf while overworking herself to maintain those two 😭 (if I'm not wrong she fucked one of Heesung's friends I think and I guess that was supposed to make me like her less but nah I liked that too hahaha).

Finally the cam scene was one of the best sex scenes I've read in so long, I swear I was there with how well everything was described, I could see the set up, the boys in discord, the girl over his lap, how he was exposing her, all the noises and let's not talk about how my baby Jake was biting his lip so excited I could totally see him with shinny eyes waiting for more and more!

Really good fic yeah, those 30k words were so easy to read I enjoyed it a lot!

My punctuation would be in general a 9/10 but only because I was really begging for her to stop giving those boys so much so easily and the time she humped his pillow because God it was her sister's bed too, how could you get hot there 😭, it's like when I've heard of people wanting to fuck on their parents' bedroom honestly wtf, JAIL ☠️.

A competitive thing uhmmmm, I think I see them more like Yeosang can't confess or do everything he dreams to do to you and Wooyoung sees it so he offers himself to help him get closer to you but Yeosang is just so shy he needs his best friend even to fuck you 🥺

[my-robot-heart]

Hey, Robot, I'm not sure if you still accept Lizzington song recs (I mean, considering that our ship has ran aground in the 8th season's finale and is gonna stay there, isolated and broken, forever unless TPTB urgently pull themselves together and make up something very very clever that would allow Liz to not be dead because there's no way they can hold afloat not for one but at least two season without her, it's completely understandable that many of us chose to dive into other fandoms), but if you do...

I was just listening to Mamma Mia's Soundtrack today (which I do a lot because that's one of my comfort movies) and "Lay All Your Love On Me" started playing and I nearly burst out crying because I realized that it's almost like this song was written for Red and Liz, especially in the earlier seasons of easy flirtation and palpable sexual tension and obvious and kinda endearing jealousy (mostly, on Liz's part... and I call it cute because there's no other adequate adjective to descrube the way she practically burnt holes in any woman who so much as laid a lustful eye on Red and all her "How do we know that you *points accusatory finger at any woman who comes near Red* can be trusted?" talk etc... I bet Red found it endearing, too, which is why he had so much fun teasing her... I mean, him making lewd comments about other women? hinting at being intimate with them? flirting with them and straight up kissing that Dr Lipstick, for example, in front of Liz?.. Come on, he clearly did it all on purpose... And that purpose was to provoke Lizzy, to make her show her jealousy because that means that she's actually attracted by him and might even one day entertain a possibility of getting together with him and that's all he might ever need? just a slightest hint of a distant possibility that the woman he's so helplessly in love with might one day feel something towards him, too, and maybe even choose him?..).

And when I say I nearly burst out crying, I mean I'd been crying my heart out for a solid half an hour because that sing reminded me about the Good Old Days and what we could have had if only TPTB weren't such sadistic idiotic bastards...

😅🥲🥺😭😭😭😢🙁😤

I mean, the lyrics... the lyrics of this song are just t h e m to the very last letter

🥺🥺🥺

Lolll oh hey! Well, I'll admit that when I was previously accepting Lizzington song recs there honestly wasn't really anything I was doing (and I still am not 100% sure why they all got sent to me 👀😅😅😅) so you can for sure send em along if you like...

but that said I should admit I haven't been very active in the fandom at all lately (I'm only reading one fic because I can't handle rehashing the shit from s8 in my mind and I'm not watching this season obvi) and I'm honestly not sure if I'll feel called to write Lizzington for a while

I don't know man.

BUT! yeah I still love seasons 1-3 independently and disregarding any and all further information that came up 💀🥲🙃 so I'm happy to reminisce about The Good Ol' Days with you, Anon.

I don't know if this will make you hate me but I'm not a huge ABBA fan so I had to review the lyrics lol.

It was like shooting a sitting duck

A little small talk, a smile, and baby I was stuck

I still don't know what you've done with me

These honestly could fit either of them in my mind lol. Like Red okay we KNEW he was a sitting duck from day one. He basically didn't even need the small talk just the pen in the neck and he was gooooonnneee.

Lizzie needed more lol, she was a sucker for the small talk (you can be my gf from Ann Arbor??) And the smiles (and the Tongue Reactions). I don't know when I started thinking SHE was stuck on him... in my fanfic she was always in love with him from day one.

Jealous!Liz and jealous!Red are both amazing tropes and I would have enjoyed watching many many seasons of them just being idiots and not getting that the other was hopeless for them.

I'm sorry you cried your heart out, been there for sure. I guess that's all I've got lol, hope this was cathartic for you 🤍 (also the ship running aground, broken metaphor was... 🥲🥲🥲)