#grammar especially is where I fall down
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duine-aiteach · 2 years ago
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Dia dhuit agus dia dhaoibh, a dhaoine eile! I have noticed that foghlaimeoirí Gaeilge who send asks to this blog often have trouble with the Irish copula ('is'). I thought I would write up a little explanation in case it helps people! If you prefer not to post this, feel free to ignore (or copy the text out to make your own original post, I don't mind). Here goes:
In Irish, there are two forms of the English word 'to be' (is/are): the verb 'bí' (tá/níl/bhfuil/raibh/beidh), and the copula (is/an?/ní). The question is, when to use which?
The answer: it depends on whether you are talking about a noun (thing), verb (action), or adjective (descriptor).
The copula is only used when you are linking a noun to another noun (or pronoun). ie: Thing = Thing.
Verbs and adjectives use the verb bí (usually the tá form).
Compare these 3 sentences: I am tired, I am running, I am a teacher.
'Tired' is an adjective. We therefore need bí (in its usual form, tá). So our sentence is: "Tá mé tuirseach" ("táim tuirseach" in the standard form).
'Running' is a verb. We need bí here as well: "Tá mé ag rith" (táim ag rith).
'A teacher' is a noun.
Noun = Noun: in this case, we need to use the copula. It becomes: "Is múinteoir mé". Because this is the Thing = Thing structure, you can't use bí (Tá mé múinteoir/tá múinteoir mé are both wrong).
(Remember that when using the copula, the two 'things' in the sentence are usually in the opposite order than in english - 'is múinteoir mé, not 'is mé múinteoir' , even though 'I' comes before 'teacher' in the English sentence.)
You could also use a slightly different structure for emphasis: Múinteoir is ea mé (i AM a teacher!).
It's also worth noting that the copula doesn't like being next to the word 'an' ('the'), so you have to change the structure slightly in that case. Consider 'I am THE teacher' - you'd think it would be 'Is an múinteoir mé', but 'is' and 'an' don't like being together, so it changes slightly: 'Is mise an múinteoir'. (You introduce yourself as 'Is mise Pól' for the same reason!)
More examples of sentences using bí and the copula correctly: Is mise d'athair! Níl tú ag dul go dtí an léithreas. An dochtuir é an fear sin? Bhí mé san ollscoil. Is mac léinn Gaeilge mé.
So there you have it! When to use the copula, and when not.
Are there exceptions? Obviously - is Gaeilge é seo. Here are some:
You can carefully arrange a Thing = Thing sentence to avoid the copula: 'Múinteoir atá ionam' is an example. Use the structure 'Thing + a + [appropriate form of verb bí] + i (the preposition 'in') + other Thing'. The literal meaning could be written something like, 'it is a teacher that is in me'. (ionam = i + mé). This form is nice because bí has more forms than the copula, so it can be easier to express more complex structures. Did you know there is no future form of the copula?* If you want to say 'I Will be a teacher', 'Múinteoir a beidh ionam' is your only option. I am only a teacher - Níl ionam ach múinteoir!
Is maith liom ___, ___ is ainm dom, etc - I personally don't understand why these phrases are constructed the way they are (why not tá?). And that's okay. I simply learn them as 'set phrases' - words that always go together. This doesn't work so well for more basic sentences like my previous examples, because for those, you will be putting new combinations of words together on the fly, so knowing the grammar mechanics really helps. For these set phrases, I just learn them and ná chur ceisteanna faoi!
*technically, the future form of the copula is also 'is' - so ' I will be a teacher' is also translated as 'is múinteoir mé', the same as present tense. Could get confusing!
I hope this was helpful to somebody! I have scanned for typos and mistakes in the Irish, but I am typing up on mobile, so I can't guarantee perfection.
Oíche mhaith agus slán!
Go raibh míle maith agat!
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vanteguccir · 2 months ago
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── ୨୧ ! SLEEPLESS NIGHT
spencer reid x reader
SUMMARY: Where Spencer finally has a night to sleep at his apartment with his girlfriend, but the current case doesn't even let him close his eyes, leading him to study the files until ungodly hours. But who said that Y/N can sleep away from him?
WARNING: Slightly mention of age gap (reader is still in college), tooth rotting fluff.
REQUESTED?: No.
AUTHOR'S NOTE: That is my work, I DON'T authorize any plagiarism, copy, or "inspiration"! | English isn't my first language, so I'm sorry if there's any grammar error.
   ༻✦༺  ༻✧༺ ༻✦༺
Spencer hated bringing work home, and he had two very specific reasons for it. First, he loathed the idea of mixing his work life with his personal life. The BAU was a constant source of darkness; gruesome crimes, twisted minds, and the unrelenting pressure to solve the unsolvable.
His home was the opposite: a place of light and warmth, a refuge from the horrors that haunted him on a daily basis. But more importantly, home was where Y/N was. She was the one person who could pull him from the depths of his thoughts, her mere presence offering a calm that he couldn't find anywhere else. She was his life, his anchor, and his sanctuary.
Their time together was sacred, especially with the demands of his job taking him away so often. Whether he was chasing unsubs across the country or spending endless hours poring over case files at the BAU, being away from Y/N was the hardest part of his job. When he was home, he wanted to be fully present, to make up for the time he lost while he was away.
He cherished the quiet moments, the lazy evenings where they could simply exist together without the weight of the world bearing down on him. He wanted to give her every ounce of his attention, to make her feel just how much she meant to him.
But then, there were nights like tonight, when the case followed him home despite his best intentions, forcing him to divide his focus in a way that always left him feeling guilty.
The bedroom was bathed in the soft glow of moonlight, filtered through the sheer curtains that hung over the windows. The clock on the nightstand read 2:37 AM, its gentle green glow a quiet reminder of how late it had become.
Spencer lay on his back, his eyes trained on the ceiling, though his mind was far from still. It raced, chasing the loose ends of the case, replaying details, searching for the missing link that could unravel everything. The unsub was smart, meticulous in his planning, calculating in his movements. It was unnerving, the way this case was so close to home, right here in Quantico.
Hotch had granted the team a rare night to return home and rest, knowing the work would pick up again with relentless intensity in the morning. Spencer knew he should be grateful for the chance to sleep in his own bed, to hold Y/N close, and let her warmth lull him into rest. But sleep felt impossible.
Beside him, Y/N slept soundly, her body curled against his. One arm rested across his chest, her hand fisting tightly the fabric of his white shirt and her hand tucked beneath his shoulder, as if even in sleep, she sought him out. Her breathing was soft and even, the slow rise and fall of her chest a soothing rhythm against his side.
Spencer turned his head slightly, watching her. She looked peaceful, her face relaxed in sleep, the faintest hint of a smile still lingering on her lips, probably remains of a dream. His heart clenched with love, a wave of warmth and tenderness washing over him.
With a soft sigh, Spencer slid his right arm beneath her, his hand resting gently on her back, the warmth of her skin seeping through the fabric of the sweater she wore - his sweater. He brought his other hand down to her bare leg, carefully shifting her until her right one draped across his thighs, her body instinctively curling closer to him, almost laying fully above him.
His fingers trailed softly along her thigh, the smooth skin warm beneath his touch. The gesture was soothing, grounding him in the present moment, in the feel of her against him. His thumb stroked lazy circles on her flesh, his touch light and reverent, as if he was trying to memorize the feel of her - as if he already didn't had each part of her craved inside his head.
He leaned down, pressing a tender kiss to her forehead, lingering there for a moment as he breathed in the familiar, comforting scent of her hair. It was a mixture of her shampoo and something uniquely hers, a scent that had always brought him comfort. His lips brushed against the delicate skin of her closed eyelids, another kiss pressed to her temple. She stirred slightly but didn’t wake, her hand tightening its grip on his shirt.
His right hand traveled across the fabric of his sweater, slipping below it, his fingertips sliding higher, brushing against the bare skin of her back. She was so warm, her skin so soft, and the feel of her made something inside him settle, if only for a moment. He continued to stroke her thigh with one hand, his other one gently massaging the muscles of her back, feeling the way her body relaxed further into him.
He stared at her for a long moment, his mind flickering between her and work. He didn’t want to leave her alone in bed, didn’t want to let it drag him away from her. Spencer knew Y/N deserved a good night's sleep more than anyone. She had been tirelessly studying for her college finals, always the most academically involved and dedicated in her class, which caused her to staying up late, buried in textbooks and research papers - just as he spent sleepless nights away on cases.
But even as he held her close, the details of the case gnawed at the edges of his thoughts, refusing to be ignored.
With a reluctant sigh, he carefully began to shift, his movements slow and deliberate, not wanting to disturb her. His hand on her thigh slid away, and he gently eased her leg off his hips, tucking it back beneath the blankets. She mumbled softly in her sleep, her body instinctively moving toward his warmth even as he slipped out from under her.
Spencer sat up, pausing for a moment as he watched her stir. Her hand reached for him in her sleep, her face burrowing further into his pillow as if searching for his scent. The sight made his chest tighten with both affection and guilty.
With one last glance at Y/N, Spencer stood, moving with the quiet precision of someone who was used to slipping away in the dead of night. He padded silently out of the bedroom, the soft sound of his footsteps muffled by the thick carpet beneath his feet.
The apartment was shrouded in a heavy, comfortable darkness, the only sound breaking the quiet being the distant hum of the refrigerator in the kitchen. Spencer moved with practiced silence, stepping lightly through the familiar space until he reached the small room they’d turned into a makeshift office. It was cluttered with his books, scattered papers, and, more recently, case files.
He flicked on the desk lamp, casting a soft, amber glow across the cluttered desk. His movements were slow, careful not to disturb the serene quiet that enveloped the apartment as he sank into his chair, rescuing his folded glasses from between all those papers.
In front of him lay the case file, the photographs of the victims staring back at him as if mocking his inability to piece it all together. He scanned the reports for what felt like the hundredth time, his brow creased in thought, eyes darting over the details.
Minutes bled into an hour, maybe more. His glasses had slipped halfway down his nose as he leaned in closer to the desk, his fingers absentmindedly tracing the outline of the crime scene photos. His other hand tugged at the cuff of his pajama sleeve, lost in the rhythm of his restless thoughts.
Just then, the sound of soft footsteps padding across the wooden floor reached his ears, the faint shuffling of bare feet snapping him out of his thoughts. He barely turned in his chair before he saw her; a sleepy, disheveled Y/N standing in the doorway, her figure backlit by the faint glow of the hallway light. The sleeves of his sweater were falling over her hands, causing her shoulders to become exposed, and her eyes were heavy with the remnants of sleep.
"Spence..." She mumbled, her voice raspy and thick with drowsiness. The sight of her tugged at his heart in the most tender way.
Spencer’s face softened instantly, guilt creeping in at the edges of his thoughts. He’d woken her.
"Hey, sweetheart." He murmured, pushing the file aside and giving her his full attention. His voice was quiet, filled with concern. "What are you doing awake? You should be asleep."
Y/N blinked at him, the bleariness in her eyes making her seem even smaller and more vulnerable. She swayed slightly on her feet, rubbing her eyes with the heel of her hand.
"I woke up... and you weren’t there." She slurred softly, taking a small step toward him, her expression confused and sleepy.
His heart clenched at her words, a wave of guilt washing over him. He hated that he’d caused her to wake up, especially on a week that she spent too much time studying and having little to no rest. He adjusted his posture above the chair, motioning her closer with gentle hands, but Y/N was already moving on her own, shuffling across the room with slow, sleepy steps, her gaze never leaving him.
"I’m sorry, I didn’t mean to wake you, dove." He whispered as she reached him. He reached out with his hands as she practically fell into his arms.
She pushed his arms open with little effort and maneuvered herself onto his lap, pressing against him as if seeking out the warmth she’d missed. Her legs straddled his thighs, her knees resting above the sides of the chair, her body curling around his like a koala hugging a tree. The weight of her felt perfect, grounding him as she nestled closer, her chest rising and falling softly against him.
"Spence, don’t apologize." She murmured, her breath tickling the skin of his neck as she shifted, her nose nuzzling into the curve of it, seeking his scent. She pressed her face against him, her lips brushing feather-light against the sensitive skin just below his ear as she planted a sleepy kiss. "You know I just can’t sleep well without you."
Spencer let out a shaky breath, the soft, familiar feeling of her lips against his neck sending warmth coursing through him. His left hand instinctively found her back, his fingers running to the hem of his sweater and lifting it slightly, making room for hand to enter under the fabric and meet her skin, spreading his fingers as he began tracing lazy circles along her spine, soothing her.
Y/N sighed in pleasure, her left hand gently crawling up to his face. Her fingers softly traced the rough stubble along his cheek before instinctively pushing his glasses back up to their proper place, her fingertips grazing the bridge of his nose in a familiar, soothing motion.
He smiled softly, his guilt still lingering but melting slightly under the comfort of her touch. She was so close, so vulnerable in her half-asleep state, and it made him feel even more protective of her.
"You should be in bed." He whispered, his voice low and affectionate, his hand continuing its gentle caress. "You have finals tomorrow... and this position’s going to make your back hurt in the morning." He tried to sound stern, but the amusement in his tone betrayed him. He couldn’t help but laugh quietly as Y/N shifted again, her hand leaving his face and meeting the other side of his neck, her right arm tightening around his torso in silent protest.
"I don’t care." She mumbled into his neck, her lips brushing against his skin as she spoke. "I love you. I want to be here."
His heart swelled at her words, an overwhelming wave of love flooding him. He turned his head slightly, pressing a kiss to the top of her head, breathing in the comforting scent of her.
"I love you more." He whispered back, his voice barely audible as he nuzzled his cheek against her hair. His hand never stopped its rhythmic movement along her back, his touch gentle and tender.
Y/N hummed in response, her breathing already slowing as the warmth of his embrace lulled her back toward sleep. Spencer could feel the way her body relaxed against his, her weight becoming heavier as she melted further into him. She was so peaceful, her soft breaths brushing against his skin in a steady rhythm.
Spencer's eyes drifted to the case file still resting on the desk, his mind unwilling to let go of the details he was trying to piece together. His hand continued to trail soothing patterns on her back, and he tilted his head down, pressing another kiss to her temple, noticing how her body was giving way to sleep again.
"Let me tuck you back into bed, sweetheart." He whispered against her skin, insisting. "You need the proper rest."
But Y/N shifted in his lap, shaking her head, clearly unwilling to move.
"No." She mumbled, her voice soft but convincing. "What I need is to be with you." She burrowed her face deeper into his neck, pressing her nose against his skin and nuzzling him like she was trying to become a part of him. "Let me stay here. Please."
Spencer sighed softly, feeling torn between the the case and the warmth of Y/N in his arms. He glanced back at Y/N, her soft breathing and her peaceful face pressed against his neck, shaking his head with how stubborn she could be.
Wrapping his arms fully around her, he held her close, one hand still caressing her back while the other pulled the case file closer to him again, reopening it and going back to the first page.
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miikapie · 10 months ago
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just thinking ab Geto with a crybaby s/o (nsfw)
hi, this is my first time posting on here :33 idk if it'll be the last. i js wrote this when i got bored while studying. i love geto sm guys hes such a sweetheart
warnings:.. dacryphilia (reader cries during the deed), a little bit of infantilisation?, sweet geto hehehee,also slightly out of character geto? idk, missionary, really bad fuckin grammar dont come at me... anything else to put here uhhh js tell me //mdni.// NSFW UNDER THE CUT!
"mmm...missed this..i missed you.."
his hips rolled slowly into you, his hands smoothing over your thighs he hiked onto his shoulders. at this point, you guys have been going at it for a long while; you've orgasmed more times than you care to count (5 times) but ofcourse, because of geto and his crazy stamina, youve been folded on the bed for atleast an hour. he came home from a particularly long and difficult mission and just..needed you. so bad.
he coos sweet nothings into your ears as he always did, kissing at your neck with the occasional groan. the pace he set was so gentle, his tip kissed your cervix with every languid push and pull through your walls.
"you're so sweet...so good to me baby.." he whispers, the sticky noises of your arousal filling the quiet room
you always found moments like this with suguru to be perfect. just him and you, together, where the rest of the world didn't matter. but for some reason today, just something about it all was just so sensual and at the perfect pace..
with his head buried in the crook of your neck, his hand travelled from your waist to your cheek. what he didn't expect to feel was a trail of ..tears?
funny thing is you didn't even realise it. you had your eyes closed and your head buried into the silk pillow beneath you. you were completely immersed in the pleasure, and didnt notice the fat tears rolling down your face.
his pace slows to a stop and looked into your eyes. you thought the way his long hair cascaded over his shoulders made him look so beautiful..especially now. you looked up at him through teary eyes. he looked worried
"hey...is everything okay?" a frown was shown on his face, as he cupped your cheeks and wiped away your tears. "did i hurt you? you're cryin.."
you sniffled subconsciously, your hands placed over his. you smiled sheepishly and look away. "i.. I didn't even notice" he kissed your forehead sweetly, his facial expressions show he finally understood what was going on.
with one hand on your waist again he started rocking his hips, earning a soft cry of satisfaction from you. "fu-fuck.."
"you feel so good you're crying? ..baby.. you're flattering me..." his coy smile appears as he looked into your eyes, watching your expression twist and turn. it was, almost sinister "i wanna see this expression more often....such a crybaby.."
there was something about that new petname he gave you, the way it rolled of his tongue so sweetly, that made your walls flutter around him. he groaned a little, his pace slow and unfaltering. he gripped onto your waist. " you like that? being called a little crybaby?"
your hips bucked into him and you mewl, loudly. "s-stop, dont embarrass me..suguru.." his hips began snapping into you faster as a response.. another tear falls down your face but this time he kisses it away.
" 's not embarrassing..im into it. keep crying. in return ill keep you all nice and stuffed, how about that?"
thanks for reading HAHA
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celuere · 3 months ago
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Teaser
pairing: Arlecchino x fem!reader
Context: You‘re getting bored during a Fatui meeting so you decide to help yourself out with your wife<33
Content: stimulation, semi-public, arle has a dick here because I said so, Pantalone is yapping too much, Arle and reader are married, mentions of giving head
I‘m writing this while I have to get up for a 10 hour shift in 5 hours so there might be a few grammar mistakes here and there🙏🏼 Will be writing part two later!
NSFW utc, MDNI
A bored yawn threatened to escape your lips as you listened to Pantalone‘s never ending scheming as you were seated at the end of a rather long Mahagoni table. The wine glass in front of you obviously untouched.
In an attempt to cure the almost deadly boredom inside of you, your gaze wandered over to Tartaglia who was more or less about to fall asleep, then over to Columbina who seemed to be more interested in grooming the feathers on the back of her head rather than listening to her colleague until your eyes stopped at a familiar hair clip neatly keeping the red-white hair of your wife together.
Her head was turned into Pantalone‘s direction, making it seem like she was genuinely interested in whatever he was spouting at the other end of the table. But of course, knowing the fourth Fatui Harbinger since the cute age of six years, you knew way better by the way she was fidgeting with the various rings on her black fingers, including your wedding ring. She was bored to death.
She probably already noticed your lingering stare too, but obviously decided to ignore it for the sake of avoiding Pantalone‘s attention.
Rude.
You let your eyes wander further down her trained body, her biceps more than noticeable, even underneath her jacket. You subconsciously bit your lip at the sight. Especially at the memory of what that biceps look like when she is pressing her hand onto your mouth to keep you quiet as she fucks her dick inside of your clenching cunt.
With a deep inhale, to keep yourself focused, you reached after your wineglass, bringing it to your lips to take a small gulp. You licked the red stain off of your lips to avoid making a grimace at the bitter taste.
God this tastes awful.
Sighing as you place your glass back down onto the table, your eyes moved back to your wife‘s hands once more, her fingers now eerily still.
So she is paying attention to you.
This made a lightbulb go on right above your head. I mean… she probably will kill you for it but a little fun never hurt… right? And before you could stop yourself your hand already wandered underneath the table, where you carefully rested your hand now on Arlecchino‘s thigh, giving it a gentle squeeze.
And for the first time of this meeting she finally turned her head back to you, crimson-black eyes piercing into yours as she raised an eyebrow at you, not opening her mouth but it was enough for you to know what she wanted to say.
What do you think you‘re doing, dove?
A simple smile grazing your lips as your hand slowly made its way up her inner thigh, inching closer and closer to her groin until you cupped the rather soft bulge in her pants. She sucked in a harsh breath at your bold action but her facial expression was still not faltering. How typical for a diplomat of her kind. Always in control of her emotions.
Except for one thing.
She could turn away and cover the lower half of her face with her cursed hand all she wanted but you could feel her thighs tense up as you gave her dick a gentle squeeze, now rubbing your thumb almost agonizingly slow over the fabric covering her.
You saw her free hand suddenly gripping after her own glass of wine, bringing it up to her mouth to take a big gulp. It‘s not like she could get drunk with the balemoon bloodfire flowing through her veins anyways. But still… she didn’t stop you, she didn’t grip your hand, nor did she shove it away.
So you took the opportunity to now move your whole hand up and down over the growing bulge in her pants. You noticed her wet her lips every now and then, head already turned back to Regrator but the way her breathing intensified more with each rub of your hand gave it all away.
Peruere Snezhevna was enjoying this.
You debated for some time if you should actually pull down the zipper on her pants and give her cock a nice handjob but this would obviously be too much for this setting. So you stuck to gentle rubs, giving her a tight squeeze here and there as you slowly but surely felt a small wet spot form on the fabric. Goodness, just the thought of you cleaning up this mess with your own tongue had you pressing your thighs together. The way she‘d always get a good grip on your hair as she settled her dick in your throat while she studied your pretty face trying to handle her length like a good girl.
You were interrupted in your daydreaming as you heard a quite „crack“ next to you. The cause? Arlecchino‘s hand is currently gripping onto the poor wineglass for dear life. Everything else about her seemed normal, even calculated if it weren’t for your wife‘s knuckles turning grey as we speak.
You bathed in her misery, pressing your hand down against her boner, nicely squeezing her until you felt her hand releasing the glass and gripping onto your hand that’s been slowly torturing her for past minutes now. Guiding it up and down the tight fabric, the feeling of the wedding ring on her finger almost hot against your own skin as she cursed something quietly underneath her breath in fontainian, something you couldn’t quite catch.
The feeling of your soaked panties didn’t make this situation any less difficult for you to keep up a normal front. Will this man ever stop talking? It’s not like anyone is listening anyways.
You almost winced as you felt her sharp nails suddenly digging into the skin on your hand and there you felt the soft twitching of her dick underneath the layer of clothes as her thighs tensed up.
She just climaxed. Inside her boxers.
You slowly inhaled, licking your lips as you carefully retreated your hand from between her legs, throwing a side glance over to Arlecchino only to be met with an almost deadly side-eye which made the butterflies in your stomach only light up even more. Her breathing was controlled. Too controlled in fact. Her nails now tapping over the fine wood of the table. Most likely debating whatever she would do with you tonight. That is until you heard the scrapping of wood against the tiles of the polished marble floor as she stood up from her seat, almost immediately throwing her big fluffy coat back over her shoulders to conceal whatever just went on between her thighs.
„Ladies, gentlemen. My wife and I sadly have some urgent business matters we still to have to take care of. I‘m deeply troubled to announce our immediate departure from this meeting.“, there was almost something like jealousy in everyone’s eyes as Pierro dismissed the both of you with a simply wave of his hand, probably because you managed to escape from Pantalone’s never ending scheming.
You were on your feet in no time as you swiftly followed her to the door, her hand grabbing yours while she dragged you outside as a sentence in fontainian left her lips, so quietly you almost thought you were imagining things now.
„Wait until we get home.“
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inksoakedparchment · 4 months ago
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Theodore Nott misunderstood Y/N’s words
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pairing: theo x fem!reader (slytherin house)
genre: fluff
tw: my english
word cunt (ik it’s count): 1073
summary: theo found your notebook in the library after the study session and he read through it
a/n: this is my first one shot (and work) in english, so i’m sorry for the bad grammar<3 (maybe it’s gonna be good bc @sunkissedscribbles read it and corrected it)
After the study session with your friend group, - Theo, Mattheo, Enzo and Cassiopeia - you accidentally forget your notebook on the table as you hurriedly leave before the others. After that, Theo notices the little black book and decides to take it.
He quickly goes to his dorm, hops on his bed and starts to read your 'diary'. Because of some of your poems, one-line-long deep thoughts, tears start running down his cheeks. He doesn’t realize how those salty water drops are just coming and coming from his eyes. It only hits him after one falls on one of the pages.
He’s raising his eyebrows after he sees the lots of cat drawings in the notebook, and the short monologues based on how much you like cats and how bad you'd like to have one. Especially black cats. He immediately shuts the book and leaves it on his bed, running out of the castle.
He knows where the stray cats are 'living' so he sits down in the grass, with treats in his hand, waiting for the adorable creations to approach him. He’s drowning in his thoughts while feeding the baby and adult cats when a night-black cat snuggles against his leg. Theo’s eyes lighten up when he notices it and gently picks it up and when the cat looks in his eyes, he gasps. Gorgeous green eyes just like Y/N’s. He checks, and he thinks the cat is a girl. Keeping the cat in his hands, he stands up and walks back into the castle, straight to your dorm.
“Yeah? Come in!” you shout from your bed when you hear the knock on your door, then sit up with a book in your hands.
“Hey, it’s me” Theo smiles at you gently, after he closes the door behind him.
“What’s up, Theo?” you tilt your head with a confused expression, seeing his nervous look.
Theo starts biting his lip, then he takes out the cat under his robe, watching your reaction. Your eyes widen in shock while you jump up from the bed, and approach Theo and that little baby.
“It's a girl,” Theo says softly.
“Wh-What? How? From where?” you start to caress her. She purrs under your touch, wanting to climb over to your hands, and he lets the kittie to you.
“I know a place that’s full of stray cats,” he smiles with an amazed look.
You put - now - your baby on your bed and hug Theo tightly, holding into his robe, because he’s the one who can make you smile anytime, even when you’re at your worst. You start to sob and then burst out in a heavy cry.
“Y/N? Did I do something wrong?” he gently pushes you away and puts one hand on your cheek, wiping away your tears.
“No, of course not. It’s just.. no one did something this big to me, but.. how did you know? It’s my biggest dream,” you mutter the last line.
“I found your notebook and I swear I wanted to give it back, but something made me keep it and read it and-”
“What?!” you cut him off “You read my notebook which is actually my diary?” you step back from him.
“I swear i didn’t wanted to, Y/N, please..” his voice cracks.
“No, Theo! Those are my personal thoughts and feelings, you just read everything! You read me!” you say hysterically.
How could he do this to you? You thought he was your best boy friend, he was always by your side. He got your back when the others couldn’t do it. He saved you from many detentions and...
“Why did you bring her to me?” you ask quietly.
“Because-” the words stuck in Theo’s throat, as he is staring into your soul. His greyish-blue eyes are full of fear and guilt. “Because I love you Y/N” he looks away, fidgeting with his fingers.
“Wha-” you gasp and look at the kittie who’s watching you two maybe with curiosity in her eyes.
“I love you Y/N! I‘ve loved you since fourth year!” he bursts out when you’re still silent.
“Why? Why didn’t you say something?” you shake your head in disbelief.
“Would it have meant anything?” he swallows, looking into your eyes.
“You said you read my notebook, Theo! What the fuck are you thinking about my poems where I wrote about love? Didn’t you notice all of them about you?” your face becomes pale when you realize you have just admitted your feelings for him.
“They looked like they were all about Mattheo” he bites his lip nervously. “He loves to smoke, mostly when I light his cig./Why didn’t he notice that’s the only spark I can give him?” these two lines are burnt into his mind. You’re smiling now. He's noted two lines from your favourite poem. Fun fact; these lines are your favourites too.
“I always light your cig last. Because you always light mine with yours,” you sigh. “And I'm always next to you, Theo because I feel safe when you’re around, and when I’m with you it feels like home,” you step closer to him and take his hand, stroking it with your thumb.
“I never noticed it,” he says quietly, squeezing your hand a little.
“I love you too, Theo. And Apollonia means a lot to me,” you smile and kiss his cheek, right after that he blushes
“I love you, Y/N. I mean it. But who’s Apollonia?” he looks at you with a confused expression.
“The kittie” you roll your eyes with a smile.
Theo takes his chance and slides his hand on your cheek. He leans closer and when he gently presses his lips to yours, you immediately kiss him back. He brushes your lip with his tongue, begging for permission to meet your tongue for a sweet, slow dance, which you quickly give to him. In this kiss, you two are going through every sweet moment, every shared cig, the pain that you caused each other while staying silent about your feelings and the love that you two feel.
He leans his forehead to yours with a sweet smile.
“I’m only yours Cara Mia, and I’ll do everything I can to make you happy” he kisses your forehead.
You smile at him and gently pull him to your bed, where Apollonia is curled up, asleep. You two are just cuddling and talking about the signs that the other didn’t notice.
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schoenpepper · 2 months ago
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Mwah!
Intro: Your way of love is spontaneous and loud, and your boyfriend is probably dying (affectionate).
Warnings: bad grammar, awful writing, not proofread
A/N: Sup. This is a request. K bye.
edit: totally forgot to tag mb i thought this was anonymous haha @fsh1
Masterlist
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“What’s this?”
You glance at the large circular item in your hands. Sure the cake is a bit burnt, and the strawberries were a little more geometric than the hearts you had tried to shape them to be, but it’s not unrecognizable, is it? “It’s a strawberry shortcake,” you answer with a smile, “you like these, right? I made it myself.”
Riddle hesitantly accepts, but not without another question. “What is it for?”
“What do you mean?”
“What’s the occasion?”
You laugh and move closer to him, leaning in to press a soft kiss to his cheek. He’s bright red, clearly flustered, and he shyly looks away as he raises the plate up to cover his face. “Riddle,” you whisper softly, “I don’t need an occasion to show my love for you.”
The housewarden of Heartslabyul cannot deal with random acts of love very well.
Especially if you do it in public.
He’ll reprimand you with a blush and claim something or the other is against the rules.
And as such, the best way to deal with him is to do all those things in the confines of his or your room. Somewhere away from the eyes of the public.
Unfortunately for him, that doesn’t exactly fall under “spontaneity”, does it?
Well, if you insist…
He’s a bit too whipped, for lack of a better word, to actually stop you.
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Your hands cup his cheeks so lovingly while you’re seated on his lap, peppering his face with butterfly kisses. Try as he might, Azul can’t find it in himself to push you away. He’s almost shaking in embarrassment with the way you’re acting…
And because the two of you aren’t alone.
From another corner of his office, the twins are snickering and whispering among themselves, whereas his “client” is nervously averting his gaze from your scandalous behavior in between the eels. Azul puts his hands on your shoulders and asks with a trembling smile, “My dear, we’re quite busy here. Is there anything you require of me?”
You grin and shake your head, “Nope! I just missed you, that’s all.”
Your words are punctuated with another kiss to his lips.
Have you ever seen someone so embarrassed and shy that they physically collapse?
Dear, you will soon if you don’t stop barging into his meetings and flirting with him as if there was nobody else there.
Please have mercy on this poor soul.
His right hand man has gathered enough blackmail to last a lifetime.
(Jade wants you to continue, please, don’t stop on his account or his camera’s)
Azul isn’t very used to such flashy, random displays of affection.
But if it’s you…he supposes he can try to adapt. He’d rather not change you or your wondrous nature.
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“Hold still, darling.”
You can’t follow Vil’s words��you follow the rush of adrenaline that zips through your veins and you move to kiss him, smearing the lipstick he’d just applied to your freshly moisturized lips. Your boyfriend looks at you exasperatedly while his vice housewarden (whom you did not know was in the room with you) is clapping and spouting nonsense.
“And which part of hold still did you not understand?” Vil raises an eyebrow.
“All of it,” you reply cheekily while wrapping your arms around him, “I feel like kissing you lots today. Is that bad?”
He huffs and rolls his eyes, but the slightest hint of a smile creeps up on his lips.
You’ll have to be a little more restrained, paparazzi’s always breathing down his neck and he can’t have the two of you be some after-dinner talk for others.
But in more private locations where he’s absolutely sure you’re alone, he’ll indulge you readily.
You can’t exactly control your PDA though, so Vil gets himself accustomed to magical disguises for outings.
Something about his favorite shade of lipstick makes you want to smudge it with a kiss.
It’s smudge proof, but keep trying.
Vil rarely gets flustered, but catch him when he’s super off guard and you can do it.
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alavestineneas · 7 months ago
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i can feel the soil falling over my head; no people are here, just the void in my chest
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pairing: Feyd-Rautha Harkonnen x fem!reader summary: Harkonnen men rarely wed; they just take what they capture—men and women—and turn them into slaves. Some, if particularly sweet, are reserved for fucking. There are no special songs for that; there isn't a specific word in their native tongue for wife, either. warnings: mentions of death, violence, implied/referenced child abuse, religious symbolism, daddy and sister issues, bald men chapter 1 - chapter 2 word count: 6,5K
author's note: hi beautiful people! this chapter may be classified as a prologue (yes, I am aware of its size, sorry, lol), but it is still integral to the story. we love evil people, especially evil bald people, in this house, so have fun and don't forget to wash your hands before reading! also, if you see things that are not canon, just know that me and the books are two parallel lines and we do not cross. feel free to point out grammar mistakes, though - english is not my first. love you!
Kaitain, 10176 AG
The violent streaks of light fight with the heavy cloth of drapes to find their way into the small, stifling chambers. The time was slowly crawling towards noon in the heavy summer heat, and the woman lying on the heavily decorated sheets was battling to get a breath in. Whether because of the annoying star, or the poisoning waiting, the patterns of sweat stained her tired face with esculent ornaments. Her lips, formed into a thin line, gleamed with small spots of dried crimson.
''Where is the messenger?'' The woman's voice was barely above a whisper, her eyes glued to the dancing light filtering through the window. ''The girl is strong; I can't hold her for much longer.''
The black figure on the chair in the corner slightly shifted at words. She was veiled, despite the heat—like a black hole, she seemed to suck the little air left. ''Forbearance,'' her raspy voice cuts through the room. ''The child makes you impatient. Control yourself.''
''I've waited, and waited long enough,'' the woman snapped, her frustration evident in her trembling hands. ''A few more minutes and all that is left of her will be a corpse.''
''Be quiet, Echidna. The child will live. If not, she was never meant to be part of our world in the first place.''
The woman clenched her jaw in a wave of pain and nodded. The girl ought to see the light of this planet today. Deep in her thoughts, she almost missed the rushed steps behind the door.
One of the Emperor's guards burst into the room, his eyes almost frantic. ''Lady Anirul has graced the Imperium with a daughter.''
Echidna smiled in relief, but her expression quickly changed as a beast-like cry pierced the air. The child was coming, with little care for the damage it caused to her aching womb. She tore the tissue down to the individual cells, gnawing her way with fists and elbows, moving the bones aside with brute force. Soon, her own cries were answered by much louder ones, as the head of the girl showed itself, covered in a thick layer of almost black blood. Just for a moment, the woman wished it would not steal another breath from the room, but she sharply composed herself. With a final push, the child left her body forever, leaving it a raw wound.
The small creature shrieked when the black figure approached, and slender, wrinkled arms took it from the warmth of rufous-red liquid. Echidna watched as the figure carried the girl away, resting her hurting body against the soaked pillows. She fulfilled her duty; she granted Bene   Gesserit the daughter they wanted. She is bleeding under a beautiful sun; she is holding the ghost of her child in her arms—the real one was never hers anyway. Echidna knows the Emperor will not come. From now on, it is just her and her never-passing pain. Thus, Kaitain, home to the Corrino dynasty, was warmed by the light of a new sun—Princess Irulan, an heiress to the Imperium—and chilled by the shadow of her sister, born a few minutes later.
-
The calmness of the gardens was disturbed only by the soft strokes of brushes against a thick canvas. YN sighed, her eyes still fixed on the tree nearby, its young branches swaying with the wind. Her body ached from stillness, the tension in her neck from holding her head slightly bowed spreading down to her small back. They posed for a portrait of what seemed like an eternity to a child, and was almost it to an adult who dared to inquire; the painter, while satisfied with the draft, looked at the group of young girls almost in fear—no normal child of that age would be unmoving for three hours. And yet, they were.
YN felt one of her sisters shift even through the thick fabric of her silver dress. Small Chalice turned, her cheeks red from the heat or tiredness, her lips forming a pout—the child was tired, sleepingly rubbing her eyes. YN thought for a moment, debating if the punishment would be worth it, or if her sisters could wait just a little bit more until the man with colours would end the session for today. She noticed how Irulan's face was starting to droop, her eyes fluttering closed and opening just a second later. Their youngest, Wensicia, was already asleep in Irulan's arms; her golden hair spread across her and YN's laps as a beautiful cover, shining under the faint sun.
''I am tired, Master Chen. We should end the painting for today,'' YN finally spoke; her voice was almost a whisper. She did not know whether it was not to awaken her sister or out of fear of the Emperor's anger; it did not matter. The man nodded and left, taking his canvases with him, leaving only a few drafts behind. Then, the sisters were left alone in the garden.
''Thank you,'' Irulan said softly, placing her head on YN's shoulder.
YN only nodded. Her eyes found the paper not so far away, her gaze studying the strokes of the pencil with interest. Wensicia, a beautiful girl of two, was smiling brightly, holding an olive branch in her chubby hands, her small feet peeking under the hem of her white dress. Small Chalice was at the opposite end of her, her curly hair surrounding her head like a halo as she leaned forward, holding a small dove inside her palms. Then, sitting at the bench, surrounded by lush greenery and bushes, they. Irulan and the Other.
YN was placed just a step away from her older sister, her head turned away from the gaze of the viewer. The delicate folds of her silver dress carefully cascaded down, creating an air of mist around them. Her hands were empty; she did not know if the artist hadn't decided with each object to grace her with, or left them hollow intently. She looked like a shadow—a ghost, maybe; her eyes were escaping the viewer as if hiding a secret.
Irulan was different. She was a sun-kissed creature, her head facing straight ahead. Her eyes, as if inviting for a challenge, were made from duty, steel. With a burning star on her regal forehead, crowning the streaks of golden hair, Irulan was water and air, dulcet and ever-bending; her figure held the place and her pose was distinct and commanding.
YN looked at the girl beside her, who was now quiet nearby. Irualn was wise, the wisest of the sisters; her eyes were all-seeing, her heart all-knowing. She was created in the shape of a mother since they could walk, and the small ones bathed in her light, drinking her till the last drop —like flowers following the warm embrace of the sun. The only one who could not enjoy the love was her, the Other. The other sister, the other half. For they have been too close in age, too similar to let each other pretend the burden was not a heavy one to bear.
When Irulan was natural in her all-caring shape, YN had to claw her way to the only role left—the father. An unbent tree, a silent soldier—she was not born to fit as one, but wishing for a different order of things was almost blasphemy. That's how it always was with them—out of two, one was the protector, the other - the protected. "Husband," Irulan humorously called her often. She smiled, and, for a moment, the wave of resentment in YN's soul calmed. She never called her wife in return: Irulan was too whole to be one, too proud to be moulded into. She stood alone, on a higher pedestal than all of them, closest to the Emperor, whom the Other was to call father, and closest to the Truth. No, Irulan was God.
God does not know how to love someone who is not his servant, because there is no one who would refuse to serve him; it is the only way. God guides, despite all one's protests. God gives, and God takes. God demands; Irulan demands—silent obedience without a need to explain or answer. That, she takes from their father. So, the Other takes a blade into her hand without compassion for her dead wishes and learns to wield it in God's name. She is the one little ones turn to when the world is too wicked for their fragile souls when the creatures under their beds lose all of their human form and turn violent. She takes their sins and bears the punishments, for they are not deserving of such cruelty. YN thinks not of her own guilt—what difference would one scourage make to one who counts in centuries? And when the sun shone, and God smiled, the Other almost forgot of the bruises she carried.
-
The first time he saw her, it was not supposed to happen at all. Feyd-Rautha just closed the door to Maester's chambers with such force that it shook against lean walls; the grumble echoed in the long corridors of Giedi Prime's fortness. The ache in his body was muted, but still present; the torn flesh inside his heart howled and clawed, slicing the ribcage in half. He would've screamed, or perhaps beat his hands bloody against the concrete until the dull pain turned into something as sharp as his knife's blade. Maybe he would've drowned himself in a small water bowl by his nightstand and done anything to escape the shame and humiliation that consumed him from within. But instead, Feyd-Rautha stood still, his jaw clenched tight and his breathing shallow. One day, it will pass. One day, he will see the world choke on its own spit.
That's when he noticed a small, shadow-like figure at the end of the hallway staring at him. A girl, not older than him, was in a dress so foreign to him that it hurt his eyes. The daughter of the Emperor, he guessed. One of many—only then would the golden stitching on her sleeve would make sense.
''What are you doing here?'' he barked, caring little for the common courtesy. Of course, she was a guest almost as prized as her father, but she was in his territory and dared to look at him for long enough without averting her eyes. Long enough to notice the bruising on his pale skin and a swelness surrounding his lips. Long enough to hear him cry.
''I was walking with my mother, but then I turned into the wrong hall,'' she shrugged. ''Will you be kind enough to show me the way out? Or should I find it myself?"
Feyd-Rautha ignored her question. What a weird creature she was—with cascades of hair and eyes that seemed to see too much. ''It is dangerous to walk these halls without guard, Princess.'' It is dangerous to be here, alone with him and the weapon strapped to his hip, but he did not add it.
''There is no use of guards if the one who wishes to kill you is their master.'' The girl took a step forward, pointing to the weapon at his side. "I am not afraid."
Feyd-Rautha laughed. It came out more as howling than human sounds, the abrupt nature of it ringing with high notes, tip-toeing down to hysterical; it sounded creaky, like his throat was not made for such sounds; yet here he was, laughing. ''Come,'' he gestured to her, his hand moving quickly, like ordering a slave around. ''I will show you why you should be.''
So, they walked. Inside the grandiose chambers and small rooms, filled with ancient artefacts or the newest technology Harkonnens came up with; inside the green lavish garden inside the dim castle and the training grounds, Feyd-Rautha showed every place that was built to display the greatness of his house and bestone fear inside both guests and people inhibiting it. He wanted to see the horror in the girl's eyes, to make her eyes water and her frame flee. Instead, he listened to her steady breathing just a step behind him, her curious questioning satisfying another need he did not know his heart possessed: reverence.
He was the youngest member of the ruling line, the smallest stone in the castle of power his uncle had built. His title meant nothing within these walls; he was too small in comparison to the Baron and his authority. Feyd-Rautha was feared, despite only being nine; he was the shadow in the corner that grew longer as the sun set, the whispered name that sent shivers down spines. But here, in the hallway he led the girl into, he turned out to be something else.
''Stunning,'' the girl whispered beside him.
Weapons. The walls, from the floor to the high ceilings, were covered in ritual and fighting blades. The pride of house Harkonnen, the tree of their dynasty, black, silver, golden, and steel knives, swords, and daggers gleamed in the dim light. Feyd-Rautha smiled, revealing a row of sharp teeth. "Welcome to our burial ground."
They stopped near every one, his voice briefly covering the story of each blade and his owner; barons that came before him; fighters and rules that defined their legacy. Some still have blood on them—the highest honour; some look almost virgin. The small signs underneath them tell the names of people who wielded these weapons, their stories forever immortalised in the cold metal. ''Each Harkonnen ruler is crafted a blade of his own, the one he is to honour in battle.''
The girl nodded, her fingers tracing the shape of the last blade carefully. Her palms danced around the sharp edge, taking in the ancient symbols she had no chance of knowing. ''Will you have to kill Baron Vladimir in order to have one, like he did with his father before?''
Feyd-Rautha paused. Of course, he has thought about it before. The idea he repeated like a mantra in his head for all of his short life, the belief that spread burning flames down his spine. The words left his mouth for the first time but felt almost natural against his cracked lips. ''I dream of the day I have the chance to.''
The pair of foreign eyes that stared back at him held a glint of intrigue that quickly changed with a flash of acknowledgement. Feyd-Rautha held the gaze; not a single thing about it was hard. Still, he was the first to turn away; the burning sensation of being  seen  made him want to tear his flesh apart. ''Let me escort you to your rooms, Princess. The walls grow colder as the evening approaches.''
-
The weather on the planet leaves too few guards out of their breath, Irulan notes. The striking sun burns through the rounded windows of man-built walls, the frankly depressing landscape of huge boxes constructed with little intent for anything else but utilitarianism. She must not fear, while those lands will also be under her power with time, but the dreadful atmosphere of the lonely planet makes her skin break out in hives.
She believes the people here are more terrifying. White, hairless creatures with eyes as dark as the sun above them speak with just nods and courseys, paying little to no attention to the world around them, save for the concrete floors.  ''Tell them to set themselves on fire, and they will,''  Irulan recalls Baron Vladimir telling her father over the banquet. She believed it to be a simple boast at first, but now, after a few days in the strange world, the words make greater sense.
Perhaps, the harsh weather made people here hardened. Perhaps, such cruelty is necessary for survival. What terrorised her more was her sister—the one who now silently reads nearby, her long dress carelessly spread on the floor. Irulan would never allow her dress to wrinkle before the concluding dinner, but she is not Irulan. Despite them being demisisters, they shared fewer similarities than one could guess. Two lambs, as many in court would call them—the white and black ones. They knew one another better than anything else; where one went, the other followed. Where Irulan failed, her sister succeeded. What was allowed for her sister, was fobility towards Irulan. No one was embedded in their small circle; no one could get close enough to understand the bond they shared—together, they were whole.
Yet as they grew older, the bond seemed to thin. The path to the mind of her sister was more often closed to her now, her thoughts veiled by the silence rooted deep into her veins. Irulan knows they are just growing up, trying to find their path in the unknown. But she is scared; what would be of her without her sister? What use would the river have without fish to fill it?
''I shall go,'' her sister says, closing the book. ''The dinner starts soon, and I wanted to return the book before it.''
''Is it the one Na-Baron recommended?'' Irulan voices. Truth be told, she would never touch anything that Baron or his family possessed, even more recommended, but her sister seemed to enjoy the ancient text.
''It is. Rather interesting are the traditions of these people. Did you know their slaves have no tongues?''
Irulan feels sick to her stomach; the thought of having slaves brings the small bits of her recent meal to her very present tongue. ''Can I come with you?'' she asks, instead of answering. Irulan does not want to leave the faint safety of her rooms, but even more, she does not want to be left alone. She feels vulnerable—she is not of power here, despite being the embodiment of it in all of the other corners of the Imperium.
''You know I walk without guards.''
Irulan knows. While she is not able as much as bathe without the presence of someone with fighting knowledge, the rules do not seem to apply to her younger sister; she can move freely, as she wishes. Was it because she carried a thin blade with her and knew how to use it, or because of the lack of care from their father? Irulan was not sure. What she was sure of, was that no woman of twelve should leave her sister alone in the halls of Harkonnens' fort.
''It is just to the reading room and back, is it not?''
''Yes,'' her sister nods.  ''I'll take you,''  it means.
So, they walk. Fortunately, the guards usually waiting outside are nowhere to be found, and they manage to slip away unnoticed. Irulan holds the hand of her sister tightly, with each noise from the outside digging her nails deeper into her soft palm. Her sister says nothing; she steps calmly into the labyrinth of corridors, navigating them without much evident trouble. Soon, they find themselves in front of a huge black door, incarnated with words Irulan hold no knowledge of.
Inside, the chamber is massive; it forms a beautiful, round circle with ceilings so high that the air in it is always chilly. Rows of books and manuscripts fill the shelves out of oxidant, contrasting starkly with the white wall. The black circle table of cold stone is filled with replicas and ancient artefacts, each emitting a soft glow.
Who knew the small, desert planet held such treasures inside? Irulan forgets about her sister entirely—the texts call to her, golden lettering shining under the light. Irulan follows the names on the covers: legends, myths, histories, and art overviews. Some even contained gardening and soil research; Baron likely held those for a good laugh.
Irulan travels deeper and deeper until the voice of her sister addressing the only library keeper almost disappears, consumed by tall bookcases. The section she finds herself in is solely dedicated to martial arts; where, if not here, would the hundreds of books on such a topic be stored? Some of them are used; the spines are slightly older; others look brand new.
Irulan is brought to her senses only when she notices a black figure moving in the corner of her vision. She puts the book back and Listens. Just like the Sisters taught her, her inner ear picks up the faint voice of her sister, and the moving of two sandaled feet—the slave handling the books. She feels something else, too. A presence familiar enough to recognise but not enough to name.
''We have to go,'' she says, grabbing her sister by the shoulder and pressing. ''We will be late,'' she explains to the slave. Not that it would question the whims of the princess.
''Why?'' her sister turns to her, confused. ''I was looking at some other books. Weren't you also?''
''Please,'' Irulan whispers. ''We spent enough time here as it is.''
Just as her sister was about to answer, the atmosphere shifted. The air, sitting in its calmness, heavied. The silent before slave turned on its feet, its eyes burning holes in Irulan's body. It lurches towards them, opening its obsidian mouth to show the blackened void inside—indeed, it possesses no tongue.
Irulan freezes. The void seems to suck her in, the sharp mouth growing wider as its owner approaches her body. The fear paralyses her, planting her otherwise quick feet deep into the ground. Now, her training as Bene Gesserit should awaken—she should oppose, or at the very least dodge, the attack. But the black mouth continues to draw her in, clouding her thoughts with terror.
The body beside her shifts; her sister is quick. With one strong thrust, she pushes Irulan aside. '' Hide ,'' the voice within her head commands, and Irulan has no force to object to the technique. She crawls under the heavy stone, frantically looking for something—anything—to protect herself with.
Despite the long skirts, her sister moves like Adam's wine; she bends and turns, and strikes the man far taller than her, but he seems determined on the idea of killing her. Her sister grunts under the heavy hits; one sits in her abdomen, and another lands on her knees. The slave's nails leave a trace on her skin, rough enough to pierce the young dermis.
Eventually, her sister grows tired; the slave pushes her to the ground, pressing his slender body on top and closing its white, almost translucent hands on her throat. Irulan clasps the found sharp cutting instrument to her chest, desperately trying to calm the wave of fear forming there.  ''I must not fear. Fear is a mind killer,''  she whispers again and again.
She watches as her sister's hand slips under her clothes and emerges an illicit, slender blade—it shines under the light just as lettering did on the books a minute ago. To Irulan, it feels like a year's hundred. ''No!'' she wants to shout as her sister raises the steel and preys it into the eye of the slave, but the words are unable to leave her throat. Like a waterfall, crimson covers her sister's face, staining her light grey dress in hot circles.
The slave falls on his back, his hands leaving their place on her sister's neck.
''Enough, please! Sister, stop!'' Irulan cries, crawling out of her hiding spot but daring not to get closer.
Her sister doesn't hear; she lurches towards the man in a slick puddle and takes his life quickly, cutting his throat in one swift motion. The blood from his arteria leaves the body in pulsations; they spatter everywhere, some drops going as far as touching the shelves.
The silence settles in the chamber once again; only the sound of weakly flowing blood disturbs the stillness. Her sister does not shed a tear; she meticulously cleans the blade with the slave's white cloth and slips it back into the folds of her gown.
''What have you done?'' Irulan whispers. Her hands tremble; the sight before her crawls into the deepest corners of her mind and tears everything there down. How can one kill so easily? How can one be so cold and calculating, as if it were nothing more than a daily chore? How could that one be her sister, the one she shared a life with?
''I protected.'' Her sister's voice is hoarse, but firm. There is no remorse in her tone, only weariness. ''What have you  done?'' She turns to face her. Her hair, carefully braided by servants for dinner, is undone; the wet strands of it grip her face like a vice, framing the unseeing eyes.
Like that, she looks like a woman mad. Irulan backs into the safety of the doors, feeling her fear turn into something much greater. ''Do not come near me,'' she commands. Just as the heavy doors close behind her, she sets off running.
-
YN waits until the footsteps of her sister are no longer heard, and only then does she come out of the reading room. She pays the body on the ground little attention; no one would bet an eye on the death of a useless creature like that. It did not intend to kill; rather, someone made it do it. Who, in their right mind, would try to harm the heir of the Emperor? How would they know that Irulan would follow her there?
Irulan. The one who watched as the Other almost gave her life for hers, the one who had the nerve to be repulsed by the blood on her hands—the blood she spilt protecting her. What do you do when you are not allowed to be angry at God? Why does God shame one for the will she herself inflicted on one to bestone? YN would ask the sun, but it hid behind the walls of the fort. She would ask, but no one would answer.
So, she does what she is meant to do—finds her way into the large dining hall, where everyone, of course, is starting to gather. The Emperor would be dissatisfied to find her not there on time; she has no time to fix her appearance. In light of the slight possibility of shaming their House with her muddled hairstyle or suffering yet another punishment for being even late, she chooses the first option.
The guards let her in without saying a word. YNr watches as the shield slides open, revealing a full hall. Rows and rows of tables, filled with foods one would imagine never would have made their way to the Giedi Prime, and laughter not so usual for a harsh realm.
''Princess...'' the servant starts, announcing her arrival, but she shushes him with a slight wave of her palm. She does not notice the crimson liquid staining it.
The Other makes her way to her seat calmly, careless of the way people around her stumble and twist their faces in shock. The only eyes that watch her without fear at the Emperor's table are those of Lady Echidna. Her face betrays no emotion at all—hidden by her veiled black cloth, it only slightly moves when the YN passes her seat.
She holds the angry gaze of the Emperor calmly. He will demand an answer, of course if Irulan has not whispered the truth into his aged ears already. Her sister probably would do no such thing; in that, she would admit to disobeying the orders bestowed upon her. YN is puzzled at the attention directed towards her humble figure—the first thing a Bene Gessarite in training learns is not to be repulsed by the anatomy of her body. Why be grossed out by the liquid coursing through her veins—the liquid she carries all her life? Why be scared of death, when it is always at your doorstep? In the sway of her thoughts, the Other also seems not to perceive the pair of icy blue eyes glued to her figure as she finds her seat and takes her place.
-
"The boy follows you around like a dog." The mother's tone stands not in judgment but rather simply states the truth.
Lady Echidna is not veiled now; her heavy hair is still tightly braided out of her face. Just a small black ribbon highlights her status as one of the Emperor's senior concubines, a position most would bear with honour. To her, it was yet another stain on her earthly body—the body she could not call her to possess. The black sun of Giedi Prime is finally long behind them; nothing but a few light orbs floating around illuminate the chamber, yet her intense gaze seems to pierce right through the girl that sits across her.
"I know, mother. His steps are heavy; his thoughts are even heavier; they follow me much more often."
The woman's fingers stop working on an intricate needlework for a moment, before continuing as it was. "You are to call me Sister, girl," she speaks, her voice low.
YN drags her teeth across her tongue, feeling the anger flow through the veins in her body. She wishes to be far away from this small chamber, to run and never face the woman's eyes again. "The girl has a name, Sister. Or do you fear to voice it?"
Lady Echidna places the cloth on the table beside her gracefully, as if paying no attention to the words spoken. But YN can sense can feel the resentment that burns inside her mother's stomach, spreading its molecules to her throat. "A name holds meaning; for a person to have a name, one must first be of character and substance. You are none."
YN bit the soft flesh inside her mouth; it tasted bitter. It was better if her mother shouted, if she hit her if she did anything to prove YN is still here in her eyes, that she was not just a void the woman spoke her riddles into. Maybe then the pain inside her would have a meaning, would have a reason better than just childish hurt. "Did I not have a beating heart when I left your womb, Sister? Did you not hear it loud and clear? What kind of proof is needed more of me?"
"My daughter died that day, screaming. You took her place. So do not bother me with your foolish talks anymore, for we both know they just waste the air we breathe. Am I heard?"
She was. The tears dried on YN's face before having the chance to spill, and she turned to her studies. Once more, a feeling of ever-lasting cold surrounded her shoulders. The never-leaving vision in her mind appeared once again—her mother's quick steps as she walked away in another corridor of Giedi Prime's fort, her head straight ahead as YN pleaded not to leave her alone, her legs glued to the command spoken. It was a blessing that the boy found her earlier than his uncle.
-
Time has passed since the first time YN's eyes saw the black sun of the foreign planet so far from hers. The Other trained, restlessly, in the tongues of ancient warriors and the most prominent whisperers, slowly earning the right to bear Knowledge in her crown-empty head. She had much yet to learn, but the prospect did not frighten her; with every passing day, she felt power building in her hands and soul. Patience, the greatest virtue of all. She was alone now, without her half of a sister; alone, in her solitude, the heavy bearings seemed not as heavy—she had no one to enlighten about her battles. Still, God was on her mind; YN felt her presence near, her watchful eyes guiding her. Like the tight, dampened cloth on her bruised knuckles, her sister was stuck to her open wound of a soul.
Irulan has grown. Her complexion changed; she no longer looked like a bright-faced girl who left her sister alone in Harkonnen's library; the plump cheeks were gone, and so was fear. At the Other stared a sole statue of power she bloomed into. Silver collars, light blue waves of fabric—the cut is, as always, straight. The Other eyed her up and down, taking in each detail of the painting-like sight. Irulan did the same—a slight disgust at the Other's simple tunic and pants, creased from the sparring. Irulan did not need to be broken in order to be a Sister in the Bene Gesserit; they wanted her Corrino first, and a servant second. The Other, however, held no such value—a child carried not by the lawful wife, a second, a spare. So, there would be no bone in her body left untouched by the lessons, no string in her soul unharmed by the knowledge. They crushed her cartilage in grey sand and forced her to swallow the bitter truths of their ways. Yet, God remains undisturbed—stoic. Eternal.
''Will you not eat again?'' Irulan musses, putting another piece of dish in her mouth.
The Other would take it as a cruel joke from anyone else, but not from God. She shakes her head instead. ''I am forbidden.''
Irulan hums. It was not the first time YN would be disciplined this way; the cycle of punishment and forgiveness was all too familiar to her. The room is silent; there is no one but the two of them. She could offer to eat, and no one would know she did, but Irulan won't offer. The Other does not expect her to; pity is not something a sister can possess.
''How are your lessons going? A fresh knowledge, perhaps?''
YN nods. If she opens her mouth now, her voice will betray her. She could cry all she wanted in the presence of a sister, but it is not appropriate for a thirteen-year-old to behave this way in front of God. The Other is reminded of that with an absence of bruises on Irulan's skin; her hands were never cut by the sharp blades, and her mouth was never starved. ''Why was I summoned from training?'' She asked, directing her eyes to the figure in front of her.
''I am here as a messenger from the Emperor.''
YN's eyes narrowed. ''And what does our dear Emperor desire to tell me now?'' She wishes not to hear anything he has to say; the Other is perfectly content here, amongst her Sisters. Here, she is of cost.
''Recently, Baron Vladimir turned to our House for guidance. He and na-Baron Feyd-Rautha Harkonnen felt misled by the House Artreidis, and their promise of a bride that did not come. Our father has graciously offered to negotiate the conflict and pay the needed price for the Baron's cooperation.''
''Of course, he did. With all of our might, we are still afraid of the savages that made Arrakis their home. With what advice, may I ask, did the Emperor provide the Baron?''
Irulan's lips turn into a straight line, with the small wrinkle on her forehead appearing. Something that she carried with her through childhood. Something that still reminded of home. ''With the proposal of a woman of our House to na-Baron Feyd-Rautha.''
''A gift? Irulan, I am so sorry.''
Sure, the bridge between them was long forgotten, growing with tall grass and wildflowers, but the weight of their shared history still lingered in the air. Irulan was still her sister, no matter how many times the Other tried to tell herself otherwise. And no woman sane would consider giving her sister to the inhumane brutes that were Harkonnens—the people even Bene Gessarit wished to observe from afar; the people so ruthless mothers told stories about them to their small offspring in an attempt to instil fear and obedience.
Irulan does not answer. She hides her gaze, her eyes following the wooden panels of the quarters.
''What is it, sister?  Speak .''
''The offer Emperor found the most fitting would be of your hand, not mine.''
The Other exhales. As if a heavy stone were put on her chest, she fights to bring much-needed oxygen to her bloodstream. She almost feels the erythrocytes scatter from her face into her neck, hidden by the cloth, and gather there in an attempt to regrow their might. Her throat twists and closes, its muscles compressing until not even an ounce of air can get in. All of her organs, from heart to stomach, made their presence known; one by one, they tensed and burned, forcing the otherwise relaxed hands to grip them.
It was supposed to be Irulan. The first one to marry is the oldest sister; the title high enough to satisfy the ambitious Harkonnes would be hers, no less. Yet, here she stands, not even looking at the one taking her place as she sentences her to an ultimate death. No matter how much power the Corrino name held, on Giedi Prime, she would consider herself fortunate enough if she were to meet her end quickly.
''Why, Irulan? Have I not been a loyal servant to you all those years? Have I not followed every order without question? ''
Irulan is unmoved in her position. ''We can not risk the Harkonnen blood getting on the throne, you know it.''
''You mean we can not risk you? We are not eight anymore, dear Irulan; you can speak truthfully now. Do you really think the Emperor will treasure you more if you say nothing now? We are no sons, Irulan; we are sisters, you and I. Please, spare me this fate.''
''Yes,'' the girl lifts her eyes, taking a step closer. ''We are no sons; you knew that one day we would marry for the peace of the Imperium. Why do you shout now?''
''Married, yes, but not murdered for the sake of the fucking old man who could not hold his promise. They are monsters, Irulan, spilling innocent blood for the fun of it. I beg of you, sister, show me the mercy I know you are capable of.''
''You are worried about blood? What could one more splash of blood mean to you? You have been no sister for a long time; I order you, as an heir of the Emperor and as the messenger of his will here, to comply. Do not make it harder than it has to be.''
The Other smiled—she would not grant the pleasure of tears. ''Very well, then. Someone needs to go first. I'll go; I'll be first, at least here. Tell the Emperor that I will comply with any of his wishes, whether it be to throw me to the sharks or to feed me to the sandworms. As a confirmation of my undying loyalty, you may show him this:''
She slaps her. She slaps her not like a warrior, not like the trained assassin she was raised to be; she slaps her like a sister, bitterly, harshly. For the first time in her short life, YN raises a hand on something she deems holy—the God's shocked face brings a sense of satisfaction to the Other's veins, even if the same blood courses through them. She turns on her heels and walks away, leaving the forsaken room behind. Leaving God behind.
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loviingpedri · 3 months ago
Text
💋 me thru the phone - joão félix
prompt: it’s hard doing long distance.
warnings: grammar issues, one suggestive comment
click to help palestine
credits to owners for all images
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the moon reflected in the window as the trees are shaking from the wind. raindrops covering the glass, slowly falling down.
staring at the picture frame of you and your boyfriend on the nightstand, you sighed.
long distance was very difficult. joão was in portugal for a little vacation, while you were in spain for work and university. joão was in and out of your apartment, meaning there was barely any contact or conversation.
he tried his best. he was the sweetest boyfriend you could ever ask for. you smelled the fresh pastel tulips in the glass vase. lost in your thoughts, and about to pick up a book, a sudden noise shocked you.
ring ring
a smile formed on your face as a picture of joão holding floki in front of a sunset on a mountain, next to him was you. a memory appearing of how your lips felt against his cheek. a scent of ocean, wood, and citrus flowing through the air.
swiping to answer his call, you were met with a smiley, tan, and dark brown eyed guy.
“hey.” he says on his white couch.
“hey, how are you?” pulling your (his) hoodie over your head to get comfortable, he could tell something was on your mind.
“i’m doing pretty good. did you get the flowers i sent?”
“yeah, i did. they’re really beautiful.” flipping your camera to show him. he admired the pink tulips, reminding him of you.
“i noticed your hoodie. wonder where you got it from,” noticing his smirk, you tried to hide your face in the camera. “is something going on? you don’t seem very talkative.”
you don’t wanna admit it, but he was right. usually, you would explain in detail on how your day was. quiet on you either meant you were mad at him, or just weren’t having a good day.
“i’m okay. not really feeling talkative today.” you gave him a small smile of reassurance. he wiggled in response, not buying the response. he shrugged it off instead of trying to push it on you.
“you look good. i’m glad you’re taking care of yourself.” honestly, that small comment made you want to lay flat on your stomach, kicking your feet in the air with a soft pink rising on your cheek.
“thanks. how’s your vacation going?” trying to control your heart rate, you decided to change the topic.
he smiled as you were fixing your hair, trying to noticeably look good for him. “it’s chill, not very eventful. sometimes i think about how i should’ve stayed with you though.”
“you know i would’ve never let you do that. you needed a break.
“yeah, i know. its been awhile. i really miss you.”
with a little sarcastic hair flip, “i’m so glad you miss me,” his laughter made butterflies fly in your stomach. “but really, i miss you too. especially when you would make hot chocolate during rainy nights. i crave it literally almost every day.”
“is that the only thing you crave?” he winked at you. your smile dropped at first in shock, but you two were dying in laughter.
“ew joão, that’s so gross.” you said in between laughter.
“if i had the opportunity to climb through the phone and kiss you, i would take it.”
“and people say romance is dead.”
rolling his eyes, you saw a glimpse of an open suitcase. it was filled with clothes neatly folded and ready for a trip. you furrowed your eyebrows.
noticing your face, “what’s wrong? did something happen?”
“are you going somewhere? i thought you weren’t leaving for another 3 weeks.”
laughing it off, which you did not find it funny (cause where is he going 🤨🤨🤨), he noticed you were being serious. you did not take the hint at all.
“y/n, don’t be sour. i’m going to fly over there tomorrow morning.” your mouth flew open. he didn’t even mention it.
“what? when did you book the ticket? you didn’t tell me anything.”
“calm down, i started packing this morning. i honestly couldn’t wait to see you anymore. i just booked the tickets literally 5 minutes ago.”
“i should probably clean the apartment a little bit then.” scrambling out of bed, ready to spot every dust speckle.
“don’t worry about it. i’m just ready to see you.”
“you should sleep early then for your flight. i’ll see you tomorrow, okay?”
nodding his head, “kisses?” you rolled your eyes. he think it’s so funny how you kissed the camera one time before hanging up. now, he wants you to do it every phone call.
blowing a kiss at the camera before quickly hanging up in embarrassment, you could see his cheeky smile. you laid in your bed, thinking about what just happened. you were kicking your feet, ready to see him.
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screaminglygay · 5 months ago
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hey! can we pretty pls have a pt2 to the stalker!amber?
Amber Freeman headcanons
warnings: dark!amber, swearing, toxic situationship, possibly bad grammar, stalking, obsessive behavior
word count: 1.7k
an: thank you for your patience! i still have some sort of writing block, so this is just something little, but I want to write a full fic on amber, so stay tuned! hehe
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Amber and you have many study sessions, she wants you to pass all the exams, it is not her fault that it always leads her to take you in any way she wants
"Amber, we talked about this..." you sigh as you look at the book infront of you, while Amber´s hands were wandering on your body.
"I'm just helping. If you can solve this under a distraction, can you imagine how good you'll be during the exam?" She looks at you, admiring you as she always does.
"So when someone would touch me during the exam I´m gonna be prepared?" You finally look at her, making a joke.
Her whole body shifts, she´s being slightly frustrated about you being such a brat. "Fine, let´s go back to stuying."
"What? I´m just playing your game, Ambs," you smile softly at her.
"No, you´re just being a fucking brat." And now, she´s mad mad.
You scan her face for a little bit, "oh come on, I was just joking," you poke her face slightly.
And there goes her tiny manipulation tactic, that you always fall hard for.
"I feel like you could do something little for me, since I´m spending so much time with you, making sure you pass..." Amber sits up.
You immedietly sit up too, "I- sorry, you are right," you take her hand in yours.
"Lay down, pretty girl..." she leans over you and you lay on your back, here it goes again.
No matter what subject, day in a week or time... Amber always knows how to make you do whatever she wants. And every single time and you... you obey.
Amber always knowing where you are, when the two of you are not together. She put few of a dog trackers in your wallet, some clothes, backpack, even into Chad´s car, just to be sure you´re always okay.
After a long weekend of not seeing eachother, Amber stops by your locker in the morning and waits for you. You immedietly smile, when you see her. It was a long time with your family on some stupid gathering outside the city, your cousin had birthday party - the most disgusting, pervy, rasist idiot. You´re very happy that you are back in school... it is kinda the same hell hole, but at least you still have your friends and Amber here.
"Hi," you say softly as you open your locker, taking out some books.
"Hi," she watches you, "how did you enjoy the family gathering?"
"It was hell-" you respond, but then you look at her with raise eyebrow, "wait, how do you know about the gathering?"
Amber without missing a beat asnwers with a smile, "Chad mentioned."
You nod, "oh, he can´t keep a secret, got it." You shake your head as you close the locker.
The girl smiles, another lie that you believe so easily. "Why a secret?"
"It´s a long story, but uh... I´m not really a fan talking about family, especially if most of them are shitty rasist who can´t name a single country outside of the US," you shrug.
"Got it, no more mentioning these people." She nods, like she doesn´t already know your whole family tree.
She has a tons of your pictures and videos, special folders on her phone, laptop, flashdisks, everything is sorted out.
Because you two are bonding more and more, she was really happy to make a new special folder of you. If the previous photos were only for her, these kinds of pictures are under increased security.
"You look so pretty, so so so pretty," she smiles at you kneeling on the bed, your hands covering your face, from all the emberassement. "Don´t be shy, puppy, look at me... come on." She takes her phone and opens camera.
"Amber..." you basically whine.
"What? Can´t I take a picture of a pretty girl on my bed?" She makes a photo. "Put those hands away for me."
You do, blushing like crazy, this is not something you´re used to. But you want to make her happy, seeing her smile at you makes something inside of you tingle.
"Pretty girl, look at you!" She smirks.
What you didn´t know, was that she has another camera in her room and every single time you´re there, you are increasing the number of files in her folder.
Even though the two of you are not official yet, everyone can see that Amber holds this sort of protection over you.
Another collage party, which is not a place you would chose to spend your time, but everyone decided to go and you didn´t want to be the only one saying no.
You are sitting on the couch next to Tara and Mindy, talking about your plans for the weekend, when all of the sudden a tall most would say handsome guy sit infront of you.
"That seat is occupied," Mindy says.
He looks around, "I don´t see anyone here. So..." He winks at you.
"That seat is occupied, they just went to grab someting to drink," you yell, because of the loud music.
"I wouldn´t leave such a pretty little thing on her own..." He smiles and you´re ready to throw up.
And before you or any of the girls could say anything, Amber steps in. "She is not alone, you dipshit."
He chuckles and stands up, "and who are you?"
"I don´t want to have a conversation with you," she splashes one of the drinks into his face, which indeed makes him leave with screaming something about a bitch.
"Oh wow, I respect that." Mindy says and Tara just stares at Amber.
"Um- thanks?" You look at Amber.
"Sorry about the drink, here take mine." She smiles as she gives you the only drink that survived.
Amber is very observing, she knows everything about you, even stuff you didn´t figure out on your own, but there are times when you totally shock her.
"Are you crazy, what are you doing here?" Amber yells at you. Walking in the rain was not the smartest decision you made. You were frozen to the bone
"I wanted to suprise you..." you smile softly.
"Wha- come in, jesus!" She steps aside so you can come inside her apartment, rushing to the bathroom for a towel.
"You uh said you had some hard time at work, so I just assumed... that maybe I could cheer you up a little bit." You say while your whole body is trembling.
Amber walks out with a towel and some of her clothes, looking at you like a deer in the headlights.
"I brought your favorite donuts and some nice relaxing candles. And we can order some sushi later. And if you´d like I can help with something, or just... keep you company, since I have zero idea what you´re doing at work." You let out a chuckle, "I mean most of the things I brought are completly wet, but I think they suvived it."
"You´re such a dumbass, do you know that?" Amber shakes her head, helping you put the things down and covering you up in a towel. "Why didn´t you call me, I could pick you up?"
"That woudln´t be a suprise, duh."
"God, we will be lucky if you won´t die from hypothermia, right now."
"I´m not helping with the stress, huh?" you sigh.
"(Y/N), I appraciate the effort, I really do, but next time, don´t try to walk in the worst thunderstorm, alright?"
"I think I could do that, yeah." The both of you laughed.
She loves PDA, her hands are on you all the time. Amber, an ardent lover of public displays of affection, is perpetually tactile, her hands finding peace on the lower back, intertwining fingers, and linked arms, embracing herself around her world.
“I’ll take this, thank you, pretty girl,” she says as she holds your hand for the billionth time today.
Amber is being your personal driver, driving you everywhere you need. Even if it means she has to wake up sooner, when you have classes, she will drive you no matter what.
The both of you made Saturdays as your movie nights.
"What are we chosing tonight?" Amber asks from the batrhoom.
You scroll through the Netflix, "how about the new season of YOU?"
Amber stops at her tracks, "um... what´s that?"
"You don´t know YOU?! What?! It´s really good show! We have to watch it."
"But you´ve already seen it, I don´t want to bother you by watching something twice..." She tries to skate out of it.
"No, no, it´s fine. I really enjoyed it and you will too!" You smile, clicking on the first season.
This was the biggest paradox in Amber´s life.
"Wow, that´s some stalker shit, just like you are!" Amber says with a light nudge.
"Oh shut up! I said if bilions of times, I didn´t stalk you. I don´t do that."
"Yeah, yeah, whatever you say, (Y/N)," Amber teases you, "but following me like a lost puppy, liking my old photo, going through my social media, are you sure you´re not a Joe to my Beck?" Oh she´s pushing it, but for you, it´s just a silly missunderstanding that happened few motnths ago.
Despite her focus on academics and socializing, Amber harbors a secret talent for photography. She has a knack for capturing candid moments and hidden emotions, using her camera lens to express herself in ways that words cannot. And when it is combined with you?
Perfection.
Amber loves when you 'steal' her clothes, there is no better view than you in her bed with only her oversized shirt on you.
"Is that my shirt?" Amber looks at you, as youre already in bed, waiting for the usual movie night.
"Definetly not," you shake your head, taking the blanket to cover you.
"Oh- then what is your favorite song?" She smirks.
"Huh?"
"You have my favorite band on your shirt, what is your favorite song from them?" Amber asks again.
"Oh... um- all of them." Good save?
She laughs "All of them? It is not a band shirt, it´s a car logo, pretty girl."
You blush, "oh." Not a good save.
"It´s fine, keep the shirt, you look pretty in it." She lays next to you, putting an arm around you, keeping you close as possible.
In her free time, Amber enjoys exploring antique shops and flea markets, searching for unique treasures and hidden gems to add to her collection. She has a keen eye for things like this.
Thank you for reading!
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sleepsacked · 4 months ago
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for eternity, c.s.
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+ college student!choi san x college student!afab!reader
+ part: 3/3 (this is all the previous parts put into one revised and extended part, so this CAN be read as a standalone!)
+ word count: 19.9k (english isn’t my only language so this is 90% edited to the best of my ability, i am so sorry for grammatical errors x)
+ tags: 18+, minors/ageless blogs dni! tags are below the cut, it’s a lot lol
+ summary: classic story of experienced reader corrupting innocent boyfriend who managed to end up together after being partnered up for a class project and explore their filthy fantasies together.
+ a/n: guys... i know. it's been two years since i uploaded on this story and trust me when i say there has not been a moment where i did not think about sitting down and uploading on here especially because i still get notifications of people re-blogging and liking the previous parts. with that being said, i revised the previous parts and fixed up my grammar and added bits of more plot to each along with adding what would have been stand-alone third part had i not decided to add all three/three and a half? (1, 2, 2.5, 3) parts together. 
please show this some love if you can, and feel free to leave me any suggestions on who you wanna see me write for next...  thank you all again for your extreme patience x
© sleepsacked 2024 / wanna buy me a coffee? xo
+ tags: semi-story building/plot, light humor, college au, virgin!san, experienced!reader, (tried to make it as gender neutral as possible), rest of atz making occasional appearance but mostly reader x san, clumsy/nerd!san, dry humping, grinding, panty stuffing? cum stuffing? hand.. grinding?, filthy makeouts, usage of pet names (babe/baby/love/sweet boy/pretty girl) a lot, teasing, sniffing..(?), vibrating dildo, body worship, hair pulling, cum play, size kink?kinda?, slight dom!reader x sub!san dynamic, slight serivce top san too lol, maybe dom san for a split second, nipple play, bed??humping??, cunnilingus, masturbation (m), panty usage(m) it'll make sense when you read lol, panty kink, begging, squirting, creampies yay, perv!san, slight corruption kink, imagination/dirty fantasy/sexuality exploration??, dirty talk, tongue play(?), whiny san yay, slight body image insecurity, slight relationship insecurity on san's part, reader is canonically on birth control ok, kinda fluffy, kinda realistic, reader and san have good communication okay, if i forgot anything lmk x
-
You and San had met in your graphics design class at the beginning of your third year of university, which was a class that had nothing to do with your major and was just some random filler class that fit into your schedule for some elective credits. 
Although he had sat on the other side of the room, he had surely made a solid impression on you. When you’d see him stroll into class, you never failed to notice how his broad shoulders expanded as he fixed his bag from falling down his arm, or how his slim waist was accentuated by whatever pair of sweats he decided to wear that day. You also never failed to notice his slight resemblance between a fox and a cat, he was definitely mesmerizing to say the least.
It wasn’t until your professor assigned a partner project; and as if fate couldn’t have been anymore real- the two of you were paired together.
You had noticed that he hadn’t spoken much in class throughout the semester, listening intently to the professor’s lectures (or just really good at pretending), and occasionally getting up to use the bathroom. Because of these facts alone, you concluded that he was more on the reserved side of society and opted out for keeping to himself; finding a quiet peace in marching to the beat of his own drum… far from most of the guys you typically sought after.
You were familiar with guys like those who were in alpha tau zeta or beta sigma tau; the ones who were easy to bring to bed but awful to bring home to your parents.
“Hey, I’m Y/N. Looks like we’re partnered together,” you laughed lightly.
“San,” he lowered his head in a quick nod, gathering his backpack to place on the floor and scooted his chair to the side to welcome you. As you sat down, you stole a quick glance in his direction before situating yourself to move your focus to the professor and the instructions for the project that was about to take course over the next couple of weeks.
-
“Alright, well if there’s no more questions, you guys are free to go for the day. And again, please don’t wait ‘til the last minute to begin your projects. Make sure you and your partner are on the same page. Have a good weekend everyone,” your professor waved. As the class began to file out, you looked back at San, noticing how slow he was at making his way out.
“Are-”
“I-”
“You go ahead first,” you laughed lightly, taking note of San’s avoidance of eye contact and the light blush that began to creep up on his neck. He clutched his backpack tighter before letting out a sigh and finally meeting your eyes.
“I was just going to ask when you wanted to begin working on our project… I’m free on the weekends and I don’t have any classes on Fridays either,” his voice trailed off, his eyes averting to the wall behind you and then back to you again.
Oh, he is going to be the death of you.
You hummed. “Yeah, weekends work for me. No classes on Friday either so we can start tomorrow? You live on campus?”
“Yeah, I live in the Arts Hall,” San nodded.
“Really?” Your eyebrows raised, “I do too. Here. Lemme get your number and I’ll text you later and we can figure out a time to meet up! I have a meeting to go to that starts in 10 and it’s on the other side of campus,” you began to pull out your phone, opening up the keypad and handing it to San.
“Oh? Oh, yeah, okay, just text me whenever. I didn’t mean to hold you up,” he fumbled his words as his hand grazed yours after taking your phone from you. He typed his number and handed your phone back to you, you smiled as you took a quick glance at his contact name.
“san :3”
Cute, you thought to yourself as you gathered your belongings and got up from your seat.
“Don’t worry about it, I’m excited to start working on our project. See you around, San,” you looked at him one last time as you waved goodbye, walking out the door to head to your meeting.
-
You hadn’t texted San yet, but that didn’t mean you hadn’t been thinking about him the whole day. You were curious to know more about him, his shyness, how you never noticed that he lived in the same dorm hall as you. You figured it really wouldn’t be too difficult to talk to San and your curiosity was eating at you more than you liked to admit (it was definitely the raging hunger).
It was already past dinner, your meeting lasting longer then you had expected. You debated taking an Uber to that one pizza restaurant you’d been meaning to try out or to just head back to your dorm and make a bowl of ramen. 
With San still on your mind as you decided on dinner plans, you realized you weren’t someone who was keen on taking the lead or being a more assertive person in a situation like this, so when you found yourself open San’s contact profile in your phone and hitting the call button, you were quite surprised.
As you were about to hang up after the first few rings you heard a faint greeting on the other end of the line.
“Hello? Who is this?”
“Hi, I’m so sorry to be calling you right now… it’s Y/N-”
“Y/N? Oh, hi… hi… are you alright?”
Your chest squeezed at his sudden concern.
“Yes! Yes, I’m okay. Seriously, I’m sorry for calling so suddenly. I just got out of my meeting-”
“This late?”
“I know right… I just got out and I was about to head to this new pizza restaurant downtown and was wondering if you wanted to come with me. I know it’s a bit… weird considering we haven’t spoken to each other before today. But I figured we could talk about our project and set up a schedule to work on it or something? If you’re not busy right now, of course.”
You rambled, suddenly regretting even calling San in the first place and realizing that it was a bit awkward to invite San out to eat on a whim like this considering the circumstances.
 There was a long pause.
“Actually, it’s okay if you can’t! I know it’s super late, and I called outta nowhere-”
“I’m down. Where are you at right now?”
“Passing the library actually...”
“That’s good, I’m on the 4th floor of the tech center, I’ll meet you at those benches in front of the library, yeah?”
“Uh… yeah, yeah, I’ll wait right here.”
San hummed, before hanging up and leaving you with your own thoughts as you walked back towards the benches and sat down, waiting patiently.
-
“How’s the practice for the showcase coming along?” 
“Could be better, we’re still working on the chorus but can’t seem to mix the vocals right and it’s been pissing us off.”
“I’m sure it’s fine, you guys are perfectionists.”
“Well, of course we are Wooyoung! I’m sure you feel the same when you choreograph, right?”
“Okay, Yunho, that’s not even a good example.”
“What? It totally is! You can’t dance if the music is shit, so we have to make sure our music isn’t shit!”
“Mingi, shouldn’t you be worrying about, I don’t know, other shit?”
San laughed to himself, his fingers grazing across the keyboard as he finished typing up some discussion answers for one of his coding classes, doing his best to tune out most of the chatter that was happening amongst his friends.
His phone buzzed against the tabletop, his screen lighting up with an unknown number. His friends stayed enthralled in their conversation, paying him no mind as he answered his phone hastily.
“Hello? Who is this?”
“Hi, I’m so sorry to be calling you right now… it’s Y/N-”
Wooyoung was the first to notice that San was on the phone, not even because he was necessarily trying to pay attention but he was about to ask if San wanted to join the rest of them heading to the cafeteria to grab a quick bite before it closed for the night.
“Hey guys, shh, shh,” Wooyoung whispered as he smacked Yunho’s arm. Yunho and Mingi’s voices died down as their attention fixed on San.
“That’s good, I’m on the 4th floor of the tech center, I’ll meet you at those benches in front of the library, yeah?” San finished with a hum before hanging up the phone, feeling three sets of eyes on him.
“So who was that?” Wooyoung’s lips fell into a coy smile, a tilt to his voice as he felt himself get giddy.
“Hm?”
“Don’t tell me…” Yunho’s hand slapped Wooyoung’s shoulder before giving it a hard grip, staring at San in disbelief. Mingi was the next to chime in, as if he felt the cue to get in on the joke.
“Finally, my man San, you shooting shots?”
San’s eyes closed, his fingers pinching the bridge of his nose before letting out a soft sigh.
“It was one of my classmates, Y/N, she’s my partner for this project in my graphics design class. She called asking to grab dinner and talk about what direction we wanna go, nothing crazy,” San began gathering his belongings and stuffing as much as he could in his bag in one go before getting up and slinging his bag over his shoulder.
“Woah, woah, woah, kinda sounds like she’s interested, no?” Yunho wiggled his brows. San immediately shook his in disagreement, feeling the tips of his ears get hot.
“San, I mean this in like, the most loving way possible, but you almost never know when someone is interested in you and… well,” Wooyoung cleared his throat before continuing, “I think it kinda has to do with the fact that… you know… you’re a little bit of a late bloomer.” Wooyoung cupped his hands around his lips as he whispered the last couple of words in San’s direction.
“Alright!” San’s voice cracked, “On that note, I will see you guys tomorrow!”
“Be safe! Use protection!”
“To manhood!”
“Yeah! What they said!”
San continued to make way out of the building, not looking back at his friends as his face continued to heat up. The comments definitely made him nervous, he didn't think you were interested in him… right? You guys barely had a full conversation and only started talking this afternoon in class despite having been together the last month and a half in the same classroom. Was this how dating was like? Was this how people pursued each other? Was it not like best friends falling in love after years of knowing each other? I mean sure, yeah plenty of couples met in different ways, he was pretty familiar with romcoms and-
No! Focus! This is just about class, the project, getting familiar enough to get a good grade and moving forward to the next semester, no time for dating or romance, and certainly no time for sex.
San wasn’t too sure what happened next but suddenly he was lying on his back at the bottom of the stairwell, his bag barely cushioning his fall and hearing a faint yell of his name outside through the glass doors. Faint pattering against the concrete outside could be heard before the glass door swung open.
“San! Oh my god? Are you okay?” You kneeled next to him, awaiting his response.
All San could manage was a groan before he turned over on his side and slowly got up from the ground, reaching for his bag in the process. This definitely couldn’t be more embarrassing- actually, no, knowing him and his luck, it definitely could be more embarrassing in due time.
“Yeah, I’m fine.”
“You sure? What even happened?”
“Um, actually, I don’t know…” his voice trailed off as he dusted off his clothing.
“What?” You laughed.
“Sorry, I mean, I think I was just lost in my head about something and must’ve missed a step.”
“Ah… lost in your head about anything in particular?” You moved to walk towards the door, reaching for the handle and letting San walk through first, his clumsy state a bit unpredictable for properly meeting up with each other.
“Thanks,” San quietly said as he walked through the glass doors and into the crisp, fall scenery that was draped prettily over the campus grounds. The trees began to lose their leaves and the colors that their foliage left painted on the ground was always the prettiest picture that San never got tired of. 
“And no. Just regular thoughts roaming around in there, I guess.” You both continued to stroll down the path that led to the student parking lot, the soft crunch of leaves creating a comforting ambiance.
“Makes sense.” You paused under one of the light posts, the sun setting enough that the lights emitted a soft glow that accentuated all different types of contours on each of your faces.
“I can order the Uber, by the way. I wasn’t sure when you’d head down or what you wanted to do or anything but I can order it, I don’t think it’ll take long to get here,” You began mumbling as you reached for your phone in your sweater.
“Uber? We can just take my truck, no?”
“You have a truck?”
“Nothing fancy, trust me, it's an ‘06 model,” San laughed, wondering why it was so surprising he owned a truck. He motioned for you to follow as he continued the path down to the parking lot, you followed behind. 
“But a truck?”
“What? A guy can’t own a truck?”
“No, it’s not that- I just mean, you don’t really seem like the truck kinda guy.”
San shrugged, “Gets me from place to place, plus she’s still kicking.”
San led the way to his truck that was parked conveniently in front of the entrance of the tech center.
“No way this truck has crank up windows,” You said in disbelief as you hopped in. “I haven’t seen these in like years, like years, San.”
He threw his head back as he laughed, giving you a shrug as you guys drove off with mindless chatter being shared amongst the both of you.
-
And that was how your relationship with San began; working as partners for a project (which you both aced) that soon led to hanging out at every free moment either of you had. Countless spontaneous dates throughout the course of those next few weeks of you inviting him out to eat dinner with you at that pizza joint. It wasn’t very much longer until San had finally asked you to be his romantic partner.
You were made aware of San’s inexperience, both in dating and intimacy, and honestly, it wasn’t something that was entirely concerning to you. You had a feeling that maybe his experience wasn’t… all there, and you were content with moving at a gradual pace, his pace. Quite truthfully, your pride and ego was well-fed knowing that you’d be the only one to share these experiences with your boyfriend for the first time.
Today, however, you had noticed a shift in San’s attitude and he was more clingy than normal; sticking to your side like glue whenever you went anywhere within your student living apartment. It started off with not wanting to let you get out of bed to use the restroom, clinging onto your waist tighter as you tried wiggling your way out of his arms and nuzzling his head in your neck with a low whine. Your head fell back against the mattress, letting out a sigh.
“Baby, what’s wrong, hm,” you stopped to look down at him as best as you could given your current state. You weren’t annoyed, by all means, but something was definitely bothering San and you were maybe just a little hurt that he was acting differently like this as a way to let you know. You wiggled around again, snaking your arm around his back and combing your fingers through the short hairs that were at the nape of his neck. 
San nuzzled his head deeper into the crook of your neck, the feeling of his eyelashes fluttering against your sensitive skin giving you goosebumps.
“Nothing’s wrong… just- I don’t know. Just wanna be around you, s’all.” Sans lips grazed ever so lightly as he spoke against your skin.
You hummed in faux agreement, “Okay, whatever you say. Lemme get up and go pee, then I can make us something to eat and we can put on that one show you were telling me about the other day, yeah?”
San squeezed his arms around you tightly one last time, before he rolled over and laid against the bed, a pout forming on his lips.
“Fine, that sound’s good.”
-
You were bent over, looking in the fridge and wondering what the hell you were going to cook up. The groceries didn’t look promising, probably because there was a lack thereof, and it was enough to have you close the fridge and look for something in the pantry.
Suddenly, muscular arms wrapped around your body, one around your waist and the other around your upper chest. Light kisses were peppered and pressed against your shoulder and the back of your neck.
“Baby, can’t we just order delivery? I miss you and want you back in bed,” San voiced through his tiny ministrations on your neck. You couldn’t help but giggle at your boyfriend’s clinginess, this level of clinginess being a new side of him you had yet to see. However, you still tried your best to keep your composure, but his broad chest felt so warm against your back that you couldn’t help but indulge in his affection.
“You sure you're okay? You’re not running a fever? Or a concussion?” You tried to turn your head to face him, but his kisses were too distracting on your body and San always had a way of making you feel like he was worshiping you. His arms squeezed you tighter, pulling your ass to meet his crotch. He gave a little thrust and you felt his hard-on press into the clothed crevice of your ass. San gave you one last kiss before he rested his chin on your shoulder and looked at you with hooded eyes.
“Yes, love, I’m okay. I just miss you, “ San leaned forward, pressing your noses together before pushing his hips up into you again, his eyes fluttering softly before he looked back at you.
“So this is why you’re being like this, huh?” A small smile formed on your lips, quickly leaning in to peck San before pulling away. “You want me to help you out?” San turned his gaze away from you, the tips of his ears becoming hot and red, which you found more than endearing.
“Whatever you wanna do right now, I’m okay with, San. Just do whatever you think might feel good for you, okay?” You spoke softly, somewhat anticipating if your boyfriend was going to make any type of move. The farthest you had gotten with San was the occasional heavy make-out sessions with occasional groping- but he never reached to touch you where you wanted him most.
San released you from his grip, not speaking as he turned you around and gently grabbed your wrist. You looked at him, waiting to see if he was going to give any response but instead, he dragged you to the bedroom, leading you to stand at the edge of the bed before walking back to the door and quietly shutting it.
He turned back to look at you, his face and ears flushed before slowly walking towards you and standing in front of you sheepishly.
“You said I can do whatever I think feels good…?” San fidgeted with his fingers, pulling the inside of his cheeks between his teeth. You grabbed his hands, gently rubbing your thumb across the top.
“Whatever you want, baby. However you want, too… however you wanna use me, I trust you,” you brought one his hands to your lips, pressing gentle kisses before opening his palm and pressing your cheek against him. You heard him gulp as you briefly glanced down and noticed the tent in his sweatpants begging for some friction, alongside the faintest spot of pre-cum forming.
“May you bend over the bed?” He spoke softly as he looked at you, eyes glossed over with lust.
You smiled and nodded, lifting your head from his palm. Before you began to turn around to bend over the edge of the bed, you stood on your tip-toes, kissing the round little tip of San’s nose before you quietly cooed at him.
“Only because you asked me so kindly,” you placed a light kiss on his lips. You caught the way his nose scrunched as he fought back a smile. He knew you loved how well-mannered he was.
You turned around and bent over the edge of the bed, your clothed-ass on display for San. You weren’t sure what he had in mind as you laid in this position, but before you could ponder too long you felt cool hands push your shirt up a little so your waist was now exposed to the cold air and before San. You could feel your lover’s body heat behind you as he began to position himself closer to you. Soft massages kneaded their way into your hips and you couldn’t help but rest your forehead on your arm as you tried your best to look back and get a good view of San.
From your peripheral, you could see how timid he was. He stared down at your ass, lip between his teeth and stepping just right to get the angle he wanted behind you. The grip of his massages became harder before his hands stilled and you felt him roll his hips into your ass.
The pressure of his heavy, clothed-cock pressing into your ass had your mouth running dry. It had been awhile since you had sex, of course respecting San’s choices into wanting to take it slow (which you also had wanted to as well, thinking that the wait would most definitely be worth it). For some reason though, the idea of not going all the way right now felt far more intimate than the act itself and that familiar feeling of warmth rushing to your core was making your body become hot and bothered quick, insanely quick.
San hadn’t moved, just resting his weight against you, hips pressed firmly into your ass. His breaths were deep and slightly heavy as you did your best at turning your body to get a better view of him; trying to take in the way his cheeks were flushed and how his mouth was red and puffy from how hard he was biting it. He couldn’t seem to take his eyes off the way his straining cock met the curves of your ass perfectly. 
“You’re doing good, baby. Just do whatever you think feels good,” You pushed your hips back against him, hearing him let out a sigh. “You know I'll be good for you, San.”
San let out a loud whine, running his hands up your back and raising your shirt in the process before lightly scratching his nails back down and hooking his fingers into your waistband.
“Y/N, can I- is it- is it okay if I take off your pants?” San rolled his hips against your ass again and you could tell he was trying to have some self-restraint, as if not to come too soon.
“Yes, please, fuck,” you groaned. San slowly rolled your pants down over the curve of your ass, pushing himself off you just enough to get them down your legs and helping you get them completely off before kicking them away from the bed.
“My underwear-“
“I know just- just let me,” San re-positioned himself behind you and when you turned your head to glance behind you, you noticed that San had also taken off his bottoms, only leaving him in his briefs and his sleep shirt which was mostly unbuttoned, leaving the expanse of his chest exposed enough to see the pink flush.
You turned back to rest your forehead against your arm, anticipating the feeling of San's heavy (and now more thinly layered) cock against your ass. 
You felt the bed dip on the side of your head, you turned to see San’s hand gripping the duvet as his other hand found contact with your hip again. He rolled his hips into you and as he did so you felt your underwear shift up and put tension on your clit. San soon fell into a steady pace of grinding his hips against your ass, occasionally leaning down to place kisses on your shoulder and suck and nip at the back of your neck.
“Y/N, baby, you feel so good like this,” San nipped at your ear, letting out a soft moan when he looked down at where the swells of your ass slightly jiggled every time he rolled his hips.
“Yeah? Feels good?” You turned your head to look at him as best as you could, almost all his body weight was on you as he began to rut his hips against your ass. You pouted your lips at him, silently pleading for the feeling of his lips on yours. He leaned down and indulged in you, lazily moving his lips against yours. In the midst of kissing, you caught his tongue with your lips and began sucking lightly. You felt San’s hips stutter and he moaned loudly with his tongue still trapped between your lips. San suddenly pulled away, his hair matted against his forehead, shirt ruffled and lips puffy. There were traces of drool going down his chin and the idea of kissing him until he became a wet, whiny mess had your mind reeling. 
“Something wrong?” You looked up at San, glancing down at the now more noticeable wet spot on his briefs, a mixture of your desire and his.
“Nothing, it’s just if I come, I wanna look at you. Flip over for me,” San placed his hands on your hips, “please,” shooting you a cheeky smile that had you giggling.
Once you flipped over, San positioned himself to where one of his legs was nestled between your thighs and pressed deliciously against your core. His head found purchase in your neck, attaching his lips and leaving love bites everywhere he could.
“You know, I've been trying not to come fast this whole time,” San breathed into your neck. “I’m just wondering how good it’s gonna be when we actually fuck,” he lifted his head to take a good look at you. 
He hadn’t realized how fucked out you actually were and it was a mental image he wanted to keep stored in his head for as long as he could. This time you were the one getting shy, the idea of San fucking you right now, eager and clumsy, was too tempting. Your panties were sticky and truthfully it was starting to get a bit uncomfortable, but San had moved his attention back to your neck, softly rutting against your hip bone which had his thigh rubbing against your clit. You involuntarily rolled your hips against his thigh, letting out a feathery moan.
San’s head snapped up from your neck, looking down at you with furrowed brows as he pressed his thigh harder into your clothed-heat. Your eyes squeezed shut as you let out another moan, head turning to the opposite side from San in embarrassment.
“San-“
“I want you to do what feels good too,” his hand grabbed your chin, gently pulling your face to look back in his direction again. His stare was too much, his eyes averting from yours to your lips and back to yours before he moved one finger to the tip of your mouth.
As if on instinct, you opened and welcomed his index finger, gently sucking and rolling your tongue around the length while doing your best to maintain eye contact.
San's eyes were solely focused on how your lips were so perfectly wrapped around his finger as the rest of his hand maintained a semi-hard grip on either side of your cheeks.
“Fuck, I can’t do this baby, I wanna come on you. Please, can I come on you?” San’s voice quivered as his eyes made their way back up to yours. With your mouth still occupied, you nodded, moaning around his finger as a means of saying yes.
He took his finger from your mouth, gently wiping it on the hem of his shirt before reaching for his shirt collar and swiftly removing it from his body and throwing it at the foot of the bed.
“It was starting to get too hot for that. You feeling okay?” San spoke, throwing a quick glance at you before he shuffled around on the bed and placed his hands on your knees to spread your legs to make room for him. 
“Shouldn’t I be asking you that?” You shifted, moving your legs around so he could slot himself between you. It took you a minute to realize that San was more bare than you, something that rarely happened. San wasn’t shy or insecure about his body, at least you didn’t seem to get that impression. You knew he took good care of himself and his physique, working out as often as he could in between study sessions or dance practices. Yet, you had come to the conclusion that maybe he just wasn’t as comfortable being shirtless in a lounge setting than you had initially thought.
“Maybe, but you didn’t answer me. How are you feeling?” San laid more of his body weight on you and instinctively you brought your hands up to feel the soft flesh of his chest.
“Feeling like I'm gonna overheat in this thick ass shirt but I also don’t wanna take it off.”
His gaze softened, placing pecks across your face. He started with your forehead, leading to your left cheek and then your right. As your eyes fluttered shut, he gently placed kisses on top of your eyelids, following down your nose to your chin and then ending at your lips.
“You’re beautiful, baby. And I'll tell you a hundred times a day- no! a hundred times an hour if i have too.”
“Can I wear your shirt?” You smiled sheepishly.
His eyebrow twitched before he began to frantically nod his head, scrambling across the sheets to bring it up to you. You sat up enough to slip your shirt off and quickly replace it with San’s with ease. Thankfully, San wore pajama sets so the shirt was thin enough to not overwhelm you. San reached up to your chest, unbuttoning a few buttons on his sleep shirt that revealed just the right amount of cleavage for him to mess with.
Once settled back on top of you, he shifted his weight so that his cock laid right between your folds. the wet stains on both of your underwear making the fabric feel much thinner.
“Fuck, Y/N,” San placed one last kiss before looking down between where your bodies met, rolling his hips with purpose against your clit. The friction of the wet fabric and the pressure of the tip of his cock rubbing deliciously against your sensitive bud made you feel like you were going insane and soon enough you found yourself rolling your hips with his.
“San, baby, you’re doing so good for me, you know that,” you moaned, wrapping a hand in his hair and gently tugging. He groaned, this time pulling back far enough to slam his hips against yours.
You moaned as your back arched slightly off the bed- you weren’t sure what had come over San, but his energy had changed so much that you had forgotten he was inexperienced.
“I'm so good for you, huh?” San said through clenched teeth, rolling his hips harder and faster. This new found discovery of San enjoying praise did something for you, making your mind reel of all the intimate endeavors that would take place in the near future.
“So good you’re gonna let me come on you? Let me come all over your panties and stuff it back up in that little pussy of yours?” He was looking at you now, bottom lip glossed with saliva from sucking it between his teeth.
“Shit,” you raised your legs higher as you spread them out more, “are you sure you’ve never done this, San? I didn't know you could be so mouthy.”
San hooked one of your legs under his arm as he shifted to get a better angle to rub his cock between you.
“You’re the one and only, baby,” he laughed, “Didn’t know I had it in me either.”
You laughed, before wrapping an arm behind his neck and pulling him down towards you for a kiss. This one was by far the messiest kiss you had ever shared with San. As he rutted against you, his lips moved against yours sloppily. Thin trails of spit formed around your mouths as you sucked and licked against each other's tongues- San pulled away just enough to speak.
“Fuckfuckfuck,” his thrusts against your clit became rougher, the fabric of your underwear rubbing against you hard. You wrapped one leg around his waist, putting pressure on his lower back and pulling him closer to your body.
“I think I’m gonna come, Y/N, oh, oh fuck-“ you looked up at San, fingers still wrapped in his hair. his brows furrowed together, mouth falling into a small, cute ‘o’ shape, feeling his hips began to stutter.
“I know, baby, go ahead,” you moved your hips against his, “you did so good. Go ahead and give it to me.” 
That seemed to set San over the edge, a high-pitched whine coming from his lips and you soon felt a warm liquid fall on top of your mound. You looked down to see San still coming, hot-spurts making their way through his briefs, the mental image of him coming inside and milking him dry making your mind reel. You moaned, bringing your hand up to his cheeks and pulling him forward in a lazy kiss.
You felt San’s hand make its way to the top of your waist band as he pulled away from you and looked down.
“I wasn’t joking about stuffing you with this Y/N,” San wiped at some of his come from your underwear with his middle finger before bringing it lower to your clothed-entrance. He prodded at the wet fabric, rubbing his come at where your hole was clenching eagerly to feel some type of release. You felt him push lightly against you, rubbing in circles his come-covered finger before applying more pressure. He quickly swiped up more before going back to your entrance and pushing his fingers inside you as best he could with your underwear still creating a barrier between the two of you. Your head fell back against the sheets and your hips moved lightly against his finger.
“San,” you moaned as a hand reached down to his wrist, holding it steady as your hips moved with more fervor. You felt his hand pull back as he shifted down to be face first with your pussy. Just as you were about to pout at the loss of contact, a harder pressure was applied. You glimpsed down through hooded eyes, taking your lip between your teeth as you saw San looking back up at you to gauge your reaction. 
This time his palm was pressed against you, cupping gently and moving up and down slightly as if he were giving you a massage.
“Grind against me, y/n,” San spoke softly, turning his head and pressing soft kisses against the inside of your thigh. He pressed his palm harder against your clothed-heat, turning his attention back to you. Your hips moved on their own accord, the fabric continuing to pull and rub against your clit. Breathy moans filled the room and San used his free hand to rub gently into your thighs and waist, occasionally reaching up to your chest and grabbing roughly through your (his) shirt.
You felt his hand pull away again, only to be quickly met with a light slap, a jolt rushing through your body as you let out a gasp. Your hand reached for the duvet, twisting lightly in your palm as you craved for that feeling again.
“Harder, please, harder,” your eyes squeezed shut as you moved your hips closer to San’s face, your way of asking for some release. The knot in your stomach began to coil tighter, waiting to be pushed over the edge. San dug the heel of his hand against your clit, moving softly as you moved your hips at your own desired and eager pace.
“Oh- oh fuck, baby, I’m gonna cum,” your hand made way to find grip in San’s disheveled hair, grabbing at the base of his locks and tugging with just enough force. In the haze of pleasure, you could make a distinction of moans that weren’t your own and you had just enough time to look down in between your legs to see San with his eyes shut and eyebrows furrowed and he let out a whine. His hand pressed harder against your clit one last time before the tension in your stomach snapped and your hips stuttered against his palm.
San moaned with you, keeping his hand pressed against you as you rode out your orgasm.
“That's it, want you to give it all to me,” he turned his head against your thighs again, placing small kisses and bites along the expanse of the fleshy skin. The lingering feelings of your orgasm soon finished and you’d fallen into a comfortable daze, loosening your grip in San’s hair and softly running your fingers through it instead. Your eyes began to flutter, forgetting about the stickiness in your panties. You snapped to your senses when you felt San move forward, still between your thighs and closer to your clothed crotch. 
He inhaled where you felt the wetness of both yours and his release was mixed together, letting out a low moan before he moved back up the bed so he was directly above you.
“You are such a perv for doing that, by the way,” you laughed as you ran your hands across his chest, taking note of the flush that was creeping up his neck.
“Hey,” he whined, leaning down to nuzzle into your neck. “You said I could do whatever I thought felt right,” you could hear and feel the pout in his voice.
“I didn't say I minded you being a little perv-y, if I wasn’t so sleepy right now I might try getting off again,” your arms wrapped around his back, nails lightly scratching up and down as you felt more of his body weigh against you.
“Is that so?” San spoke softly as his lips sucked love bites into your neck.
“It is,” you moved your head to the side, allowing more room for him to kiss and suck at your neck. “You know you sound cute when you’re all whiny, San.”
“Babe,” his voice dragged out as he rolled off you, embarrassed. Your laugh rang throughout the room as you turned to your side and reached out for San before he could make it too far out of reach.
“You know I'm teasing you, baby. Now can we clean up real quick before I pass out over here?” you placed a quick kiss on San’s lips before you began to get up from the bed, the stickiness between your legs becoming too unbearable.
San followed behind you quickly, grabbing your waist and pulling you in his arms.
“Thank you,” he whispered against your hair as he hugged you a little more tightly. You smiled against his chest as you wrapped your arms around his waist, this man was definitely going to be the death of you.
-
It hadn’t been very long since your previous intimate interaction with San, and you had noticed that he was much more keen on expanding and expressing his sexual interests with you. He was more clingy, and confident, and was constantly finding ways to express his sweet affections towards you, especially in the confines of your shared apartment.
He asked questions constantly about your own sexual interests, which you found both cute and endearing as most times (all the time) he’d stutter and get all flustered at the thought of even saying such crude things aloud so casually.
So today, when he asked you about your own self-pleasure experiences, you weren’t entirely caught off guard.
You both laid in the living room, sprawled on the couch, your head in his lap as his fingers softly scratched against your scalp. He was focused on something on his phone as you felt your eyes get heavier with the comfort of having your hair played with, the noise from the television being the right amount of white noise to allow you to doze off peacefully. San set his phone down on the arm rest, leaning forward slightly to get a glimpse of you.
“Babe, you still up?” San spoke softly, removing his hand from your head and bringing it to caress your cheek. You hummed, snuggling your head into his lap to get more comfortable.
“Hm… yeah, I’m up,” you muttered, your eyes finally blinking slowly before you shut them completely. You felt him lean back against the couch, hand still resting on your cheek, his thumb slowly running back and forth.
“Well if you’re up, like up up- awake up, then I have a question. Hm… something I’m curious about.” San spoke slowly, as if he was thinking of the right way to word his sentences so as to not come across a certain way. You nodded, having enough sense to know that your boyfriend wanted to talk to you seriously, forcing your eyes open as much as the sleepiness would allow.
“I’m up, I'm up… what is it, hm?” A silence followed as you waited for San to speak, you shifted in his lap so you were looking up right at him. his eyes focused on the television, but in a way that was zoned out and not actually paying attention to the content that was displayed on the screen.
“San?” your attention on him completely now, taking note of the way his eyebrows were furrowed together as his hand had slipped from your cheek amidst your shifting and was now lying comfortably across your neck. Hearing your voice snapped him out of his little daydream as he looked down out at you, the tips of his ears catching a blush.
“Oh, yeah. Um… I was just curious about- like- how do I say- uh,” his voice trailed off as he averted his attention back to the television. You waited expectantly, having an idea where this conversation might be leading to.
“Go on,” you spoke softly.
“Have you ever… touched yourself?” San whispered, as if speaking too loudly would get him scolded by the gods above. You couldn’t help but laugh, getting up from his lap and sitting up again on the couch to face him. Sleep was no longer something on your mind as your boyfriend never failed to catch your attention in conversations like this. He pouted, avoiding your eyesight and fidgeting with his fingers in his lap.
“Sorry baby, I don't mean to laugh. You’re just too cute when you get like this,” you leaned forward to place a quick kiss on his cheek before you leaned back and answered him properly.
“Yes, I have touched myself before. Who’s asking?” you teased.
San shot you a quick glance before facing forward again, shifting to sit up straighter. He cleared his throat before speaking once again.
“With a toy? Have you- uh- ever touched yourself with a toy?” His cheeks flushed as he moved his hands higher in his lap, crossing his legs. Your eyebrows raised, a slight smile forming on your face. You scooted closer to him, laying your head on his shoulder as you wrapped your arms around his bicep.
“Yes and no. I had like... one of those little bullet vibrators a long ass time ago that Heejin got me as a joke but ended up throwing that shit away ‘cause… well… it was a bullet vibrator,” you laughed, leaning your head further into his space.
“After that, it crossed my mind to maybe get actual toys. Like a vibrating dildo or a butt plug or something but it’s hard finding good sites that sell that shit discreetly and adult shops are just so… I feel too awkward,” your voice trailed, looking up to see San looking back down at you, waiting for you to finish your thoughts.
“You know how you see those videos of coffee shop baristas and they’re like ‘what your coffee order says about you’ or ‘what you look like based on your coffee order’ and it's a bunch of stereotypes that are lowkey kinda true? Yeah, I feel like that’s what would happen if I went to a sex shop. I mean, I think my kinks are pretty tame compared to extremists- at least I think they are- but… still it’s just so awkward,” you physically cringed. 
San nodded, laughing lightly at the comparison you gave between coffee shops and sex shops. You reached up to place your hand on his cheek and turned him to face you. 
“Are you asking me because you wanna get one?” You smiled mischievously.
“Well, you see, I was asking ‘cause, you know-“ San fumbled his words.
“We can if you want… I don't really mind. Is that what you were looking at on your phone?”
San nodded, reaching for his phone again, and stealing a quick glance at you before unlocking it and leaning into you so you both had a clear view of his screen.
The next hour was spent between looking at options before deciding on a generic vibrating dildo, deciding that you could upgrade later if need be. The estimated delivery time was said to be a week, so to your surprise at checking the mail room downstairs three days later with a package, was exciting to say the least.
On the way back to your room, you pulled your phone out, opening your chat with San.
y/n: bb look!
y/n: 1 file attachment
y/n: it just came in the mail... ;-)
y/n: tbh i'm surprised it got here so fast?? then again it says it came from that one town we drove thru on the way to my parents so ig it wasn’t that far??
-
“Hold on guys, gimme one sec,” San panted, breaking away from his friends and their current dance session.
“Aw shit, Mr. loverboy over here gotta answer to his girl,” Yunho teased, nudging Wooyoung as they both laughed amongst themselves.
San shot them both a teasing glare before picking up his phone and opening your messages. As he was getting ready to hit send, another message from you was delivered and soon after a photo attachment.
y/n: 1 file attachment
y/n: san omg
y/n: why does this thing look huge
y/n: its kinda cute tho good job picking it out
y/n: baby hurry up and get home plsplsplsplpslspsl need u nowww
“Whatcha looking at?” Wooyoung chirped, swinging his arm around San's shoulders and leaning towards his phone. Before San could push Wooyoung away, he was already opening his mouth.
“Damn! Is that a dildo? Since when did you get all freaky on us, man? Coulda sworn you were still a virgin!” Wooyoung grabbed his phone, clicking on the image you sent. Your hand was delicately wrapped around the base of the dildo, which was an opaque purple shade (color choice courtesy of San). Your hands did the toy no justice, because you were right- it did in fact look huge.
“Ay man, gimme my phone,” San said in his most assertive voice he could muster, not even bothering to panic or make frantic moves at Wooyoung- knowing how his friend was. It didn't help that his cheeks were tinted with a light blush and he could feel his cock stirring in his sweats at the thought of you begging for him to come home so you guys could get play around. 
“Hey, what happened?” Yunho came up to San and Wooyoung, looking between the two men. San’s phone pinged again with another message from you and Wooyoung took a quick glance, smirking, before handing the phone back to San.
“Well, our Sannie boy here seems to have gotten a bit mischievous these days, Yunho. I think we should wrap up practice early today, let him get back home to his girl,” Wooyoung said as he looked back at a confused Yunho.
San looked down at his phone quickly, wondering what could’ve possibly gotten Wooyoung to say such a response.
y/n: 1 file attachment
y/n: can’t wait to play w my sweet boy <3
The picture was of you already in bed, one of San’s shirts with some cute but simple black lace panties. Your knees were bent and the dildo was laying between your thighs as if to make it appear like you were wearing a strap-on.
San's eyes went wide, his ears feeling hot, and his stomach flipping knowing that one of his friends was well-aware about the kind of activities you and him were planning on having tonight.
“Oh yeah? I was actually planning on cutting practice early anyways. Mingi texted me asking if I could stop by the studio for some feedback on some of his and Joong’s songs for that showcase in a couple weeks,” Yunho eyed San carefully, who was staring at his phone screen intently. Wooyoung laughed as he caught Yunho's confused expression towards San.
“Alright, well I'm out then! I'll catch y’all later! I gotta meet up with Jongho and Yeosang for one of  our CompSci classes,” Wooyoung headed for the door, grabbing his jacket and bag from the rack. “Oh and San, one more thing,” Wooyoung turned around, waiting for San to look up at him and properly acknowledge him. San's attention averted to Wooyoung, waiting for him to speak.
“Don’t do anything I wouldn't do... and trust me, there’s not a lot out there I wouldn't,” he shot San a wink before slipping out the door.
“That guy, man,” Yunho laughed, shaking his head.
“Well, I'm gonna head out? Just text in the group chat when you wanna meet up again, you know when I'm free. Or let Seonghwa know,” San spoke quietly, his mind still reeling on the fact that you were home alone right now, horny, waiting for him. 
The feeling of his cock being constrained tightly against the band of his boxers turned into an aching sensation- god, he just wanted to be with you already.
“Yeah, I'll text you later,” the two men nodded at each other. San made his way to the door, and just before he had the chance to exit, Yunho called out to him.
“Ya!” 
San turned around, looking expectantly at Yunho.
“Don’t do anything I wouldn't do.” Yunho smiled, waving San off.
“Shut up, Yunho.” San laughed, giving him the middle finger and shaking his head.
And with that, San slipped out of the practice room, making his way to his car.
-
You were laid in bed, scrolling mindlessly between social media outlets, distracting yourself enough as you waited for San to get home from dance practice. 
[new notifications]
my bb: on my way home now, my love
my bb: ur kinda insane btw
my bb: sending pictures like that while im out
my bb: the guys ended practice early, had some other stuff they needed to do
my bb: ill be home in 5
You smiled reading the messages, excited to see your boyfriend after you’d both been busy with classes and any other extracurricular activities you guys were involved in, but even more so knowing that you were going to be able to try out your new toy.
When San had arrived home, you were sprawled out on your stomach, a blanket draped over your lower half, the dildo and your phone momentarily forgotten. The faint sound of music flooded the room, your eyes closed as you quietly sang along.
San was true to his word because 5 minutes later he was entering your room, jacket and shoes already off, pulling his shirt over his head and discarding it to the chair tucked under your desk. The bed dipped as you felt a hand lay across your back, opening your eyes to welcome San laying down next to you, shirtless, in the bottoms he wore to practice and sweaty hair.
“Hi,” you spoke softly, shifting to face San as a hand reached up to cup his cheek. Your thumb ran along the skin, his eyes fluttering at your soft touch. 
“How was your practice, hm?”
“It was fine. Probably one of our better ones in a while so I’m kinda pissed it ended earlier than I expected, but I'm home now so I’m not complaining.” He finished his thought with a kiss to the tip of your nose as his hand was rubbing up and down along your back.
“Well, I'm glad your home ‘cause that means I get to take all your attention.”
“Hm, so where is it? Where’s the- uh, you know…”
You smiled at San getting flustered over his words, leaning back to feel around the bed before you finally lifted the blanket to reveal the cute little toy. You reached for it, putting it between you and San as you looked back at him expectantly.
“Right here! Isn’t it cute?” 
You rotated the toy in your hands, there wasn’t much to admire apart from the color and thickness and the handle with the buttons at the bottom. San’s cheeks were flushed as his hands traveled to your waist, gripping firmly.
“Yeah.. yeah it is,” he nervously laughed. “Did you... already put batteries in it?”
“Mhm, but I haven’t tested it out yet. I was waiting for you to get home.” 
You pressed the tip of the toy into San’s pectoral, slightly shifting your hand around to press the power button at one of the lower settings, a faint buzzing echoing in your ears. San began to breathe heavier, his grip on your waist loosening as his eyes screwed shut.
“What… what are you doing?” San sighed, eyes opening slightly as he looked down at you.
“Do you trust me?” your hand stilled.
San nodded. 
“Wanna hear you say it, baby. Do you trust me?”
“Yes, fuck, I trust you. I trust you so much, please." San's eyes screwed shut again. He didn’t know what he was begging for, he just wanted something. Since he’d left the studio, he’d been fighting down his boner the whole ride home, wanting to wait for you to play with him. It felt as though every bone in him was going to snap if he didn’t get some form of release, and fast.
You used your free hand to lightly push him on his back, soon adjusting yourself to swing your leg over his waist. You leaned forward, pressing a light kiss against his lips before you rested your forehead against his.
You had nudged your nose against his softly, a butterfly kiss.
“Then lemme take care of you, sweet boy.” 
San let out a low moan, bucking his hips against you. You leaned back, pressing your weight against his cock, his chest heaving up and down quickly, arms tense at his sides. You let out a breathy laugh at his nervous reaction, suddenly feeling your own chest tighten with nerves. This was really happening, huh?
“Just relax, baby. I got you, okay?” You ran the toy that was still vibrating slightly down the middle of his chest, stopping right above his naval. 
“If you don’t like something, promise you’ll tell me, yeah?”
“Yes, yes, Y/N I’ll tell you, just- just please-” you looked below where your crotch was on top of San. He still had his practice sweats on, his cock straining so hard in the confinement.
“Is it okay if I take these off you?” 
You switched the vibrator off before tossing it to the side, getting up to stand at San’s feet which were hanging off the end of the bed. A quick yes was enough confirmation to slide his sweats off, once off your hand reached to his briefs, stopping just as your fingers hooked on either side of the band. 
“These too?” 
Another quick yes from San allowed him to be laying completely naked in front of you. His cock sprung, slapping against his naval, red and leaking with pre-cum- begging for some friction.
You crawled back up the bed, hands resting on either side of San’s head. You reached to his forehead to brush the hair that was beginning to curtain his eyes, feeling the sweat that was starting to form at his hairline. You leaned down, pressing your lips to the spot between his eyebrows and leaving a trail of kisses down to his cheeks and jawline before making a final round to his lips. His arms wrapped around your back, pulling you flush against his chest as his tongue slipped in your mouth.
You both stayed like that for god knows how long, lazily making out and groping one another, enjoying each other’s presence to the fullest. San pulled away from you, looking up at you with swollen, wet lips and flushed cheeks.
“Baby, I love kissing you so much, you know that, but my dick is so hard right now that I feel like I'm about to pass out,” he whispered, his hands pushing your shirt up and then making their way down to the swell of your ass.
You laughed, lifting yourself off of him to sit yourself in his lap but he stopped you before you could get yourself comfortable and situated.
“Wait! Wait... um- can you- would you mind taking these off?” San asked sheepishly, fingers hooking ever so lightly in the waistband. 
You felt yourself clench around nothing, you and San hadn’t been naked in front of each other like this. Not in such a lewd position at least, so the thought had your mind and body raging with nerves and excitement. You moved quickly to rid your panties from your legs, your essence following along and smearing on the inside of your thighs. San's eyes followed your movements and in the corner of your eye, you caught a glimpse of his dick twitching against his stomach. 
You climbed back on the bed, legs on either side of San’s hips, lowering yourself so the underside of San's cock was wedged between your pussy.
“Fuck,” San whined, hands finding purchasing on your waist again and making their way under the front of your shirt to grope at your bra-less chest. 
You were embarrassed at how turned on you were, but before you even had enough time to register that, your hips moved along San’s length. Your slick made your movements easier, stopping yourself just enough that your clit teased against the head of his cock. You felt San’s index finger flick against your hardened nipple, your hips stuttering as you let out a breathy moan.
“Baby, you’re gonna be the death of me you know that?” You moaned again as San brought his thumb up to pinch your nipple. “So cute, so good for me. Always treat me so good, fuck, got such a pretty cock too.” 
You reached to your side, grabbing the dildo and turning it on low. San's eyes followed your movement, you pressed the tip of the toy to slit San's cock. His body jolted under you, his mouth fell lax as his stomach tensed. Your free hand scratched lightly at his stomach, your other pressed the toy harder against the slit of his cock as you began to softly grind your clit along his length.
“Oh- oh my god- fuck,” San’s body shook as he let out a string of profanities. “It feels too good, y/n. I think I'm gonna come- fuckfuckfuck.”
“Go ahead, baby. You deserve it, go ahead and make a mess.” 
You moved your hips against his length faster, loving the way his stomach and thighs were flexing underneath you.
“I’m coming, oh fuck, oh-” San’s arms flew over his face as he let out a long whine. 
Hot, milky spurts painted his stomach and chest beautifully, a little bit shooting up underneath his chin and along his neck. you slowed your hips, taking in how fucked out your boyfriend looked like this.
You turned off the toy, setting it down next to you as you reached up to San, removing his arms from his face. His eyes were barely open, his whole face flushed as his bangs were matted against his forehead.
“Hey, you okay?” You whispered softly, planting a soft kiss to his lips. San hummed in confirmation, a soft smile forming on his face. 
“Good, lemme clean you up real quick.” You leaned back, swiping your finger at some of the mess on San's stomach and bringing it to your lips. To your surprise, San’s cock twitched ever so slightly, still red and half-hard.
You got up to grab the towel from your desk chair, walking back and softly wiping at San’s stomach, chest, and neck. Once finished, you settled in bed next to him, laying on your side.
“You didn’t come?” 
You shook your head no as your hand reached up to play with his hair.
“But don’t worry about it. Tonight was about you, okay?” 
San pouted, and in a blink of an eye he was hovering over you. both of his hands planted on either side of your head, his half-hard cock weighing down against your mound.
“Lemme take care of you... I wanna play with you too.” 
He sat back on his heels, his hands moving to your knees and spreading your legs apart so your pussy was on full display. Your breath hitched as you saw him reach for the toy, his hands twisting it around to maneuver the buttons on. The buzzing sound filled the room again and soon you felt a pressure against your clit.
Moaning, you looked down where San’s hand lay between your legs holding the toy. He was unsure what to do, it was clear on his face. You reached down to wrap your hand around his wrist.
“Here. Like this.” 
You moved the toy along your folds; San shifted on the bed so he was now laying on his stomach, his face adjacent from your pussy, teeth between his lips as he watched intently how you moved his hand around to pleasure yourself.
He turned the setting up a notch with his free hand, before moving it to grab underneath your thigh and placing it over his shoulder.
“Is it okay if I put- hm... put it in?” He asked, placing a quick kiss on your thigh before he turned his attention back to your fluttering hole.
“Yes, please baby, please put it in.”
You moaned as his hand moved the toy just right and the tip of the toy prodded at your entrance. The grip San had on your thigh tightened as the toy pushed its way in slowly. 
You couldn’t see, too enthralled in your own pleasure, but San’s hips had begun to rut against the bed. He’d been imagining his own cock in place of the toy, easing into you, stretching you out, making you shake, maybe even cry with how good it all fucking felt. He was eager to make you climax, so he continued to push the toy into you, giving the bed beneath him a particularly hard thrust as well.
Your walls fluttered against the toy, it’d been awhile since you’d felt so full. You’d touched yourself before but the width and length of your fingers was far different compared to how the toy felt inside you. Even far more different when it was your lover who was fucking you with it.
Your hand slid up your shirt, grabbing at your breasts as the other went to pull at San’s hair.
“Feels so full.” You moaned, your hips moving at the same rhythm of San’s hand. 
“Wish it was your cock making me feel good, want it. Want it so bad, baby.” 
You were close, so fucking close. 
San began to push the toy deeper in you all while kissing and biting at your thigh.
“Fuck- faster.” 
The grip on San’s hair tightened. The tension you felt in your belly ready to snap at any given moment.
“Like that?” San whispered, his hand pushing the toy in and out of you.
“Yes- don’t stop. please, please baby don’t fucking stop. I’m gonna come-” You squirmed along the bed, trying to move your hips along with the perfect rhythm that San had created. 
You felt him press your hips down to still you, his head moving forward as you felt his lips place a feathery kiss to your clit before giving it a harsh suck. You finally snapped.
“Oh fuck I’m coming- fuck! I’m coming.” You whined as your legs tried closing in around San to snap shut.
San didn’t let up on the sucking, still holding the toy deep inside you trying to make the most of your orgasm. He moaned against your clit, releasing from you with a faint pop and leaning his head against your thigh.
You looked down at him as he pulled to toy out from you, his eyes admiring how wet you’d made it. As if his curiosity got the best of him, he brought the toy to his mouth and wrapped his lips around the tip. His eyes met yours as his cheeks hollowed out, pushing the toy further in before pulling out and licking his lips clean. He made his way back up to you, putting all his body weight on you and nuzzling his face into your neck, letting out a sigh of content.
“You taste good, babe, wanna eat you out next time,” San whispered in your ear, his tongue playfully licking at your earlobe.
“I don’t know how you do it.” 
San lifted his head from your neck and peppered kisses all over your cheek.
“Do what?” He pushed himself off you, grabbing the towel you had used on him earlier and pushing your legs apart so he could gently wipe you clean. You used as much strength as you had left to bring yourself up to rest on your elbows, eyeing him.
“Drive me crazy, that’s what.” You laughed as your eyes trailed down to where San was laying earlier.
“Hey what’s that?” You pointed at the rather large spot on the comforter, San looked to where you were pointing, his eyes going wide.
“Holy shit… no fucking way.” Your jaw dropped in disbelief. “You came again? On the bed?”
“Well... yeah…” San mumbled, tossing the towel to the pile of discarded clothes.
You laughed, crawling your way across the bed to meet your boyfriend, arms wrapping around his neck as his naturally fell around your hips.
“You’re a naughty thing, you know that? Are you sure you’re a virgin?” You teased, no real malice or doubt in your voice. 
You leaned forward to kiss the tip of his nose, catching the way his lips curved into a small smile. 
“How ‘bout we run a shower and we can worry about the sheets later, hm?” San nodded at your suggestion, lowering himself to grab the back of your thighs before lifting you up. 
Your legs wrapped around his waist as he began walking to the bathroom. 
“Hey,” you spoke softly. He stopped in his tracks, moving his head to face you, waiting attentively.
“Just wanted to say I love you,” you kissed him, feeling him smile against your lips, the feeling never getting old. He pulled away from you, resting his forehead against yours.
“I love you more, pretty girl.”
-
The last time you and San had messed around was a lot farther than you both had gotten with each other, and the more that you guys explored and experimented with each other’s bodies, the more both of you found yourselves constantly looking for ways to feed each other affection.
San was aware of your sexual experience and at times when he was too lost in his head, he’d often feel insecure and wonder if the other people you’d been with were better- in any aspect really.
However, you constantly reassured him otherwise and for that he was more than thankful. Which led him to his current predicament.
You weren’t at the apartment, having had to run some errands for the day and San insisted on making time to hang out. He’d woken up too late that you’d already left to go do the things you needed to get done, so you suggested he just wait at home until you finished. Ever so quick to please, he found himself doing random chores around the place to keep himself occupied.
Today was laundry day, he dumped the basket of clothes on the bed that you had taken forever to fold (one of his little pet peeves but, still, he didn’t mind picking up the slack every now and then because he knew how busy you got.)
He hadn’t realized that the current load to switch from the laundry was your delicates (he zoned out quite a lot when he was left to his own devices), and for whatever reason he was feeling himself become more and more embarrassed as the seconds passed.
It was just panties, he didn’t know why he’d felt so shy about it. He’d seen you in your panties plenty of times, even if you were just lounging around in them. You were his partner, there was really no need to get all worked up, right?
No, there definitely was. He felt like a pervert feeling himself warm up at the thought of messing around with your intimate pieces of clothing without you here. But that feeling didn’t stop him from doing what he was about to do next. 
He kicked his shoes off, making his way to your bed and laying amongst your sheets. Flipping over on his stomach, he buried his face in your pillow letting out a soft sigh. It smelled like you, sweet and safe, mixed with the stench of clean linens. He laid like that a little longer, the feeling of sleep trying to grasp him and almost winning. It wasn't until he shifted around to lay on his back that he noticed the tent forming in between his legs.
“Jesus…” he muttered to himself, eyebrows furrowed in confusion. He was definitely more in love with you then he’d thought. You were always so understanding… so willing to let him explore his sexuality comfortably. but also so independent and level-headed, you just had so many qualities to you that he absolutely loved and made him feel loved and maybe that’s why just the thought of you drove him mad and never failed to awaken something deep inside of him. His heart swelled up each time you crossed his mind and for that he knew he was truly deep in some shit. 
For fuck’s sake- he was getting hard just being in your most intimate spaces- without you even here next to him!
He closed his eyes, hands fisting the sheets lightly. He didn’t want to get off right now, at least not until you got back or something. But the idea of also getting off in your bed, while you weren’t there next to him was also kind of exciting. He laid still for a few minutes, mentally giving himself a time frame to see if his erection would go away and if it softened- then that was that; if it didn’t… well he’d cross that bridge when he got there.
And much to his surprise, it didn’t soften. Getting up from your bed, he paced around your room. He was really contemplating the idea of getting off, wondering if he should text you and ask; you know- for the sake of being polite. But that idea sounded stupid and truthfully, he couldn’t bring himself to ask, not wanting to face any judgment you might have (little to his knowledge, you found it hot that San had his little perv-y moments- but you weren’t going to tell him that). 
Amongst his pacing, his hip bumped into one of your dresser drawers that had been left slightly open amidst your morning routine.
“Ah- fuck!” San grabbed his hip, rubbing harshly to soothe the pain. He looked down at the drawer he bumped into, noticing a mixture of patterns of lace and cotton intertwining with each other. His curiosity never failed to get the best of him, he reached for the drawer, hooking his fingers around the edge and pulling it open, bracing himself.
He’d already known what to expect when he opened the drawer quite truthfully, but god did he still feel a little shameful when he felt his cock twitch in his sweats looking at your panties that laid messily folded in the drawer below him.
He reached for the contents hesitantly, his eyes catching on a pair he remembered you wearing for one of your date nights. It was a black lace piece, the pattern soft and elegant like you, he thought to himself, with a tiny little pink rose placed atop a bow. that night you’d worn them, you and San were leaving a restaurant when your shoelaces had come undone- and ever the gentleman, San had offered to tie it for you. Insisting that he didn’t want you to bend down and worry about your skirt riding up or you flashing anyone, and maybe he’d taken a quick look up your skirt when you weren’t looking (you definitely noticed) but that was a story for another day.
Once he grabbed the panties, he noticed that the lace was a lot smoother in his hands than he thought, he wondered if you’d ever bought lingerie for him- or for your other past partners. He shook the thought from his head, not wanting to think about you being with other people right now- past or not.
His mind wandered as he remembered the first time you laid in front of him, in his shirt and panties, his hot come laying on your mound as you looked completely fucked out. San’s grip tightened around your panties as he debated this dilemma internally.
“Fuck it,” he muttered to himself as he closed the drawer with his other hand and made his way to your bed. He moved around, so that his body was half sitting up and half laying down against your sheets. If he was going to do this, he wanted to at least be comfortable.
 His cock was throbbing and it was starting to be painful, that familiar wet patch seeping its way through his underwear and sweats as if welcoming him for indulging in his sinful desires.
He bunched his shirt to his chest and pulled his bottoms down to just above his knees; his cock slapping against his naval, red and shiny.
He let out a soft moan at the contact, mind turning to mush as the smell of your sheets was making him feel so… safe. He gripped himself at the base, bringing his other hand that had your panties to his nose. his hand flinched, his thoughts making him second guess himself one last time before he inhaled deeply, tightening his grip around his cock.
“Fuck,” he whined, inhaling your panties one last time before bringing it to the tip of his cock and slowly wrapping the fabric around himself. The feeling of the lace was different and for a split second his mind entertained the idea of what it’d be like to wear them while he got himself off to the thought of you, but he was too desperate now- the thought leaving his mind just as fast as it had entered his head. 
He palmed the head of his cock, the lace rubbing against his slit, while his other hand tugged at his balls.
He felt dirty, filthy… utterly sinful. But he didn’t care as he kept stroking himself as he remembered the blissful look of you coming hard on that toy you’d both picked out. The hand that was tugging himself found his way up his stomach, lightly raking his nails against the skin before sliding under his shirt and stopping at his hardened nipple.
“Baby, please,” he whined softly. It was useless to beg, you weren’t there of course but he couldn’t help himself. He pictured himself between your legs again, this time having you ride his face. Using him however you wanted, his tongue prodding against your hole as he sucked and sucked and sucked against your clit. 
He flicked his nipple before giving it a quick pinch, his hips jerking off the bed against his panty-covered hand. He moved his hand free from his chest, bringing it down to his cock so both of his hands were wrapped around his shaft. Your panties covered his tip completely as he began to rut his hips upwards, both hands moving along with his hips.
He was close, so fucking close and it was all happening to quick.
“Fuck,” San groaned, “fuckfuckfuck,” his hips moved faster as his imagination kept going on and on with different scenarios of how he wanted to ravish you. Images of him fucking you in every position you could imagine, ran through his head. 
But the one that sent him over the edge was you on top, riding him dangerously slow, playing with your tits. In his head, you’d reached down and grabbed his chin, asking him so sweetly to look at you and open his mouth- and he did. you’d lean over him, letting go of his chin before making him stick his tongue out and grabbing the tip of it with your fingers and holding it firmly, leaning down and whispering obscene things to him- about him.
How he was so good for you, letting you fuck him dumb and never even imagining that he’d let you take control of him like this.
“Oh my fucking god I’m gonna come, please, oh my god,” San whined. “Wanna be good for you, so fucking good baby, please, feels so fucking good.” 
His hips stuttered as his eyes closed shut, a deep moan coming from his chest. He opened his eyes enough to look down, he felt like he couldn’t stop coming, his come seeping through your panties and sliding down his fisted hands.
For his own, twisted pleasure, he continued to stroke himself. Swiping at some of his come and bringing it to his slit, running his index finger back and forth. His body shivered, he wondered to himself if he could come again- Maybe if he really tried, but he knew as long as you ran through his head, anything was possible.
However, he was snapped out of his post-orgasm daze when his phone began to ring. He searched the bed looking for the sound, finally grabbing his phone and seeing your name flash against the screen. His heart pounded against his chest as he hit the green button.
“Hey, babe, what’s up?” He cleared his throat in hopes of not sounding too… off.
“Hey, was just calling ‘cause you weren’t answering my texts- just wanted to make sure you were good.” 
You mumbled something after that he couldn’t make out, hearing a faint honking noise in the background. 
“Anyways, I'm on my way back to the apartment, but wanted to see if you needed me to stop and get anything? You hungry?”
“No, I'm okay, just drive safe. I miss you.”
You laughed.
“I miss you, too, baby. You okay, though? You sound kinda off?”
“No- yeah, yeah I’m fine! Was just dozing off waiting for you, s’all.”
“Mhm… right.” 
Your voice dragged, not entirely convinced. 
“Okay, well, I’m not that far so I'll see you in a sec. Love you!”
“I love you more,” and with that you both hung up.
San set his phone down, laying his head back against your pillows as he looked up at the ceiling. He felt himself soften in his hands, the lace of the panties laying across more of his lower half. He entertained the thought more adequately this time, wondering what it’d be like to wear something like this, how would he look if you fucked him stupid while he wore-
“What the fuck?” he mumbled to himself, shaking his head as if to rid himself physically from the thought. He got up, looking for something to clean himself with as he tried to figure out where to put your now-stained panties.
Once that was decided, he laid back in your bed. Shuffling under the covers and recapping everything that had happened within the last hour. He shut his eyes briefly and on cue, the door beeped, signaling you had just gotten home.
He laughed to himself both in disbelief and embarrassment, you were really making him question everything. But for some reason, he didn’t mind as long as it was you.
-
It had been a few days after you had run your errands and had come back home to San lying around (quite suspiciously might you add) in your bed.
You didn't want to press him on it, but that didn’t keep you from having your own suspicions. Letting whatever it was that he was hiding, to let it be. Which you figured it couldn't have been that bad to begin with regardless, just that he had maybe been a bit... mischievous.
But it was the thought of him being alone in your room for that long, and knowing him, he intentionally or unintentionally snooped around.
Today was a laundry day though, you had grabbed your hamper and dumped the clothes on your floor so you could separate the delicates and the colors.
Amidst your separating, you noticed the black lace pair you'd worn ages ago, on one of the first dates that you and San had gone on.
You guys were walking back to the car when he had stopped you, letting you know your shoelace had come undone. Just as you were about to bend down and tie your shoe, he stopped you, insisting you shouldn't because you were wearing a skirt and he didn't want you to be uncomfortable. As he fell to his knees, you shifted your legs slightly, moving one foot out so he could tie your shoe easier. In doing so, your skirt raised, allowing your underwear to be seen. San's head turned, taking a quick peek and trying to memorize the lace pattern that was laying across your skin. You definitely noticed, turning your head away and smiling to yourself.
You reached for the pair, wondering to yourself when it was that you had worn them, dropping them once you realized that the pair had faint, white residue. Your eyebrows furrowed as you thought of all possibilities as to why your underwear would have dry cum on them.
Did... San...? You wondered, before thinking of ways in which you should ask him about it, or even if you wanted to. You decided to leave it be for now, ready to be over with your daily chores for the day.
-
[new notifications]
y/n: babe~
y/n: r u ready
y/n: im abt to be there in 5 :] 
San's phone buzzed from his shelf as he finished gathering up the rest of his items for your guy's trip. It was your first trip together, and he wasn't too sure about you, but he was definitely excited because this was finally going to be it. 
You had both talked about finally going all the way together, and San insisted at least creating a little world away from the craziness of your everyday lives so he could fully enjoy you. You thought it was sweet and honestly, he was the only boyfriend you had who was so adamant on constantly trying to create the perfect atmosphere to show his deep love for you, and it made your heart swell every single time.
His phone buzzed again, he glanced down at his watch, seeing a new message from you saying you were here. He walked over to the shelf where his phone was, grabbing it along with his weekend bag and heading out.
You waited patiently in the car, your thumbs tapping against the steering wheel to the rhythm of the music playing in the background. You snapped out of your mindless daze when you felt a knock against the window, you turned your head, meeting San's eyes as he pointed to the back of your car, signaling you to open the trunk.
Moments later he was sliding in the passenger seat next to you, leaning over the console and placing a soft kiss on your cheek.
"Hi baby," he said as he leaned back and hastened his seat belt over his chest, securing it in the buckle.
You smiled, "Hi, how'd you sleep?"
"Good, I think," he reached for your hand as you put the car in drive, listening idly to where the GPS was telling you to go. "Missed you, was excited all night for this trip," he brought your hand up to his lips, pressing a soft kiss.
You hummed, "You're awfully affectionate today, you really missed me that much, huh?"
San let out a light laugh, "I miss you everyday."
A comfortable silence shortly fell between the both of you as you continued to drive.
-
You pulled up to the Airbnb, which San had reserved for the holiday weekend. Calm waves hit the shore, and the sound of birds chirping echoed softly in the distance.
You put the car in park, nudging San slightly to get his attention.
"Look," you nodded your head in front of you. "Isn't it beautiful?"
"Wow," San leaned forward in his seat, his mouth open in awe. "It is... can't believe we get to spend the holiday here."
"C'mon, let's go check it out," you smiled before stepping out of the car.
You made your way to the house, San following behind. You opened the door, taking note of the spacious interior.
You felt San's arms wrap around you, him leaning down and placing soft kisses along your cheek before making his way up to your ear.
"All this space just for us, hm," he poked his tongue out, laying a soft lick against your lobe. "Wanna take you on every. Single. Surface."
You leaned back against him, your eyes fluttering shut at the feeling of him being so close.
"Yeah yeah, you can after we get settled in," you hummed, pushing yourself off him and making your way further into the house. You set your keys on the counter, taking one last look at the Airbnb before turning back to San and making your way to the door. As you were about to pass him, your hands tapped at his chest before pulling him with you.
"C'mon, you nasty boy, let's unload the car," You said, a light laugh from San following shortly after.
-
You stepped out the restroom, your robe hanging carelessly around your body as you tried drying off your hair as best as you could.
"Babe, I still don't know why we can't just shower together," San grumbled from the bed.
"'Cause," you mumbled, making your way to your suitcase. "I still get shy."
You rummaged through your clothes, looking for some undergarments and a lounge shirt. Quickly slipping them on, your eyes caught a peek at that specific pair you brought with you. You turned around to quickly glance at San, seeing that he was sprawled on the bed, shirtless and in sweats. His arms were crossed over his face as he mindlessly sung to himself. You reached down for the pair, finally turning around and tossing them onto San's chest.
His body gently flinched at the contact in surprise, before he moved his arms down and looked at what was laying on his chest. His body froze.
"Y'know I'd been meaning to ask you if those looked familiar," You said as you walked over to the bed, climbing your way up to seat yourself in San's lap. He looked up at you, his ears and face turning flush as he hummed in response.
"I was doing my laundry before the trip and well," You reached for the underwear before dragging it across his stomach. "I like to separate my delicates and colors and such... and I couldn't help but notice those were dirty."
"I also couldn't remember the last time I had worn them, at least recently. Do you know what they were dirty with, San?" 
He looked up at you briefly, his cheeks flushed and eyes full of guilt. Despite that, you felt him growing hard underneath you. you didn't give him a chance to answer before leaning down next to his ear and whispering, "They were dirty with someone's cum, baby... can you believe it?"
He let out a soft groan, his hands reaching for your waist before making their way down to your ass and gently groping you.
"Fine, fine. I'm guilty, you got me." His eyes squeezed shut as he gripped your ass more rough, before rolling his hips up into you.
You gasped, your chest pressing flush against San. "I wasn't expecting you to admit it so fast."
"Yeah, I know. I'm embarrassed, but right now I don't care. Just want you to touch me," His hands removed themselves from your ass before bringing them up to the back of your neck and pulling you into a kiss.
The kiss was slow and lazy, your hands making their way to lay gently on top of San's chest.
"Mm, babe," your voice muffled against San's lips, he hummed, pressing his lips harder and grabbing your ass tighter. You managed to pull away, pressing your forehead against his, opening your eyes slightly to see his eyes still shut.
"San," you whispered, pulling away completely to look down at him from being seated in his lap. You took note of the way his body stayed flush, the light sheen of sweat glistening in the dim light, his pink swollen lips, to the way his sweats were snug around his hard cock. 
"Why don't you..." Your hands slowly moved around his chest, the tips of your fingers grazing his skin like a feather, before stopping at the buds of his nipples. "Why don't you show me how you made a mess on my panties in the first place, huh?" Your fingers moved on their own, lightly pinching the buds between them and giving them a soft tug, testing the waters.
San moaned, his shoulders squirming against the mattress, "S-show you? Yeah, yeah I can do that, j-just lemme- ah," He opened his eyes to look up at you, the glossy look he had during moments like this never failing to make you weak. He lightly tapped your ass, signaling you to get off him, in which you complied. You shuffled along the bed until your back was leaning against the headboard, your shirt scrunched to your waist leaving the top of your thighs exposed. San moved next to you, moving himself around the bed until he managed to squirm his way to lay between your legs, his back pressed against your stomach and his head resting against your shoulder.
"You..." San's hands found their way to lay on the sides of your thighs, gently squeezing. "You said to show you, so I just thought... that maybe this would be... the best view I could give you." San's voice barely above a whisper, his head turning to look up at you. You nodded, looking back at him, leaning in to give him a quick kiss, your legs bending to place your feet on his waistband, doing your best attempt at trying to slide his sweats down.
His hands wrapped your ankles, leaning forward and giving each one a swift kiss before gently placing them on either side of his hips and laying back against you. He shimmied his way out his sweats before kicking them to the edge of the bed, his naked body on full display before you.
"It feels nicer like this," San said, his voice having a gravel edge to it. "When I was in your bed, I didn't have the luxury to be naked like I am now.." his cock looked angry laying against his stomach, beads of pre-cum smearing against the tight skin of his lower stomach. You stared in awe, before looking briefly at San's face, his hair falling into his eyes. You reached a hand to lay in his hair, swiping the hair upwards and running your nails gently back and forth against his scalp. San sighed, his cock jolting against his stomach, his head following the caresses of your hand.
"Y/n... you know," San’s hands clenched repeatedly against his sides before reaching down to wrap around his length. “There was so much that I was thinking about when I was laying in your bed.”
His hands massaged his length slowly, occasionally reaching down to tug at his balls before continuing his ministrations on himself.
You felt the wetness growing between your legs, your eyes skimming every part of his body displayed before you. the sheen of sweat forming at the base of his neck and trailing down the wide expanse of his chest. Your hands moved to his shoulders, gently caressing down his arms.
You hummed waiting for him to continue, shifting your hips as best as you could in your current position.
“You were on top, riding my face, and I was letting you do whatever you wanted to me, it just- ah- felt so good... knowing you were so good- feelin’ so good and-” San let out a loud moan, throwing his head back against your shoulder, eyes screwed shut. his hands tugged harder at his length, his thumb playing at the sensitive slit.
“What else, hm?” Your hands made their way to his nipples, testing the waters again and gently grazing against the hardened buds.
San's body caved in on itself at the sudden contact, rushing to tell you to wait.
“You okay?” You managed to get out, feeling your chest squeeze.
“Sorry, yes yes, I’m okay, it’s just.. if you keep doing that I’ll come too soon.”
"Here, lemme get up." 
San moved forward to let you move from behind him. 
"Lay back." 
His hand released his cock as he shifted around before finally grabbing a pillow and resting it behind his head. You shuffled to sit on top of him, not fully planting all your body weight down. San's breath hitched. Your hands reached for the knot of your robe, slowly untying it to reveal yourself before San and letting it fall down the expanse of your shoulders and back. 
San's eyes focused on every part of you, the way your nipples were perked from being aroused and the slight cool air that was slowly turning hot. The way your soft flesh was flushed, the way your thighs looked caging his frame at his hips. But his eyes really caught focus on the way your pussy was beginning to drip with wetness onto his cock. "Is this okay?" You quietly asked, leaning forward to rest your hands on either side of his head. 
"Perfect, you're perfect. It's perfect. C'mere." San reached around the best he could to pull you down to meet his lips by the back of your neck. His hands resting on either side of your face, thumbs caressing your cheeks as your tongues swirled around each other. You felt yourself relaxing, your chest pressed against his and finally seating yourself on top of his cock. San moaned, his hips bucking up quickly, the tip of his cock briefly rubbing against your bundle of nerves. You pulled away from his lips, meeting his eyes before resting your forehead on his. 
"Did you want to... you know," Your voice trailed off in a whisper. 
"Please, yes. Yes, did you-" 
"We can stay like this if that's okay with you, I really don't mind." 
"That's okay," San gulped. Suddenly feeling his nerves spike. He wasn't worried about anything other than cumming quickly. Which would be as expected, considering his circumstances. But he had some hope that he could last at least enough time to help you reach your climax. Regardless, he trusted you.
You pushed yourself up, suddenly feeling anxious. You reached down to grab at the base San's cock, lining it up with your entrance. You could feel San's eyes staring at where his cock and your pussy were able to meet. He felt heavy in your hands, each throb a reflection of his unwavering desire for you. You lowered yourself on him, your essence making it easier for you to slide down. It had obviously been a while since you had actual sex, and pleasuring yourself did not compare to the feeling of having the man you loved inside you. The tip of his cock had pushed through, you felt yourself clench around the intrusion. You and San let out a moan in unison. 
"Why- Why do I feel like I'm gonna come?" San said in a strained voice as his hands fisted the sheets, stomach tensing beneath you. 
"Just- Wait-" You breathed out, letting all your weight down on San's cock. The feeling of him stuffed fully inside of you made you feel dizzy nonetheless. San let out a long whine, he pushed himself up from the mattress to meet your body, pulling you in a tight hug. 
"I love you so much, so so much. You don't even understand." San grumbled into the crook of your neck, placing kisses along the spot where your ear and neck met. You let out a needy whine, reaching your arms around his back to embrace him as well. You moved your hips as best as you could given the current position, grinding in small circles. San pulled away, one of his hands reaching to grope at your chest. 
He leaned down, kissing along the valley of your chest that led down to your nipple. His mouth closed around the perked bud, his tongue swirling around delicately. You let out a moan, your hands reaching up to take hold of his hair, nails gently scraping against his scalp before gently tugging at the roots.
San's hands reached around you again, his nails softly scratching down against the expanse of your back before finding purchase on your ass. He gripped the flesh with firmness, pulling you down as he tried to buck up into you. The tip of his cock grazed the cervix ever so slightly, causing you to let out a sharp whine. 
"Sannie, baby, do that- do that again." That was the first time San heard you call him that. It triggered something in him, but he couldn't quite explain it. He brought your hips down again as he bucked up into you, leaning forward and clumsily capturing your lips in a kiss. 
His cock twitched inside you, it didn't take much to know that he was close. You were honestly surprised that he had held out this long but then again you two had fooled around before this so how surprising could it really have been. You pulled away from his lips, leaning in for one last peck before moving your hips with more fervor. 
"C'mon baby, I know you're close. It's okay, you can let it out."
If you had to ask San to relive one moment from his life again before he died, he'd think he'd confidently say that it'd be this moment. He actually might be dramatic, it would probably be an entirely different moment, but his mental, his senses, his heart, was so consumed with the thought of you that he was sure that if he died right now, he’d die a happy man.
There was something about the way that you always softly demanded him or guided him during these intimate moments- there was a gentleness mixed with a sternness in your demeanor that drove him insane.
He gave one last buck of his hips, the plushness of your ass jiggling slightly against his hands before he felt the tension that was in his balls release.
San held you close, his head falling on your shoulder and leaning into the crook of your neck. The loud groan being the only thing that you could hear, you felt your body shudder at the feeling of hot ropes of cum painting your gummy walls. You sat there on the bed in each other’s embrace for what felt like an eternity, San was the first to say something.
“Baby.”
You hummed, your hands rubbing up and down his back, your fingertips grazing his skin with the softest caress you could muster.
“Can I eat you out?”
“What?” You pulled away to look San in the eyes, only to find him avoiding your gaze.
“I’m serious, I know you didn’t get to… finish and I don’t really care that you know…”
You shook your head, moving to get off him to lay down. The feeling of his cock instantly slipping out of you having your pussy clench. You were stuffed full of him seed, not realizing how much he’d actually came until it began to dribble down the insides of your thighs.
You settled on your back, eyes shut from shyness.
“Fuck,” You heard San whisper as he turned his body to get a better view at you. His hands grabbed at your knees pushing them forward to your chest.
“Hold them for me.”
“No way…”
“What?”
“I still can’t believe you’re this nasty, San. Are you sure you haven’t been jukin’ me this whole time?” You let out a breathy laugh, your pussy clenching again as San’s hands massaged the back of your thighs before dragging them closer to your pussy.
He laughed with you, his pointer fingers spreading your lips open. You couldn’t help but moan, feeling his seed dribble down. 
“Say you want it,” San said, pausing his movements.
“What?”
“Say you want it- tell me how bad you want it,” San’s eyes stayed focused on the way you kept clenching around nothing.
This was definitely new, San never feigned feeling some type of way about always falling into a more submissive role during your previous intimate times together. You could confidently say this was a type of reassurance he wanted. You felt yourself gulp, eyes screwing shut once again.
“Want it…” You mumbled. Before you even had the chance to repeat yourself louder, you felt a sharp sting on your inner thigh which ignited a surprised yelp from you. You hadn’t expected the palm of his hand to meet so harshly with your skin.
“Sorry I-”
“It’s okay, San. I promise it’s okay- God, please do that again, want it so bad. Want you so fucking bad, please. Just fucking do something.”
San couldn’t understand what he was feeling, seeing your fucked out face, squirming and moaning for him to touch you. It was always him that was left to this role, and don’t get him wrong- he definitely enjoyed it. You made him feel safe and comforted, but prior to this trip when he had wondered about your previous partners and finally losing his virginity to you… he really couldn’t help but wonder how he could make you feel that same safe feeling during sex that you never failed to make him feel.
He wanted you to crave him the same way he craved you.
He quickly maneuvered himself to be eye level with your core and wasted no time in wrapping his lips around you. His tongue poked and prodded at your hole, tasting himself on his lips. He pressed his palms down into your thighs trying to spread you out the best he could as he continued to suck and lick at your most sensitive parts.
“Wait, oh fuck- Don’t stop.” You threw your head back into the mattress, you could feel your clit throbbing as you tried bucking your hips up into San’s mouth.
“Right there, you’re doing so good, baby. Right there- fuck-”
San felt his chest grow in pride, continuing to lick and prod at your clit. His tongue swirled around the overstimulated bud, he could feel your legs switching between relaxed and tensed. He pressed his tongue flat against your core, letting you grind against his face. He was determined to make you cum without his fingers.
“Oh my god- I’m gonna- Shit, I’m coming baby, I’m coming, ooh my god,” You let out a long whine, trying to shut your legs around San’s head but with no prevail. 
It happened suddenly, your orgasm crashing down and in a blink of an eye you felt one of your things being pressed open while you felt fingers enter you.
“Wha-”
“Gimme one last one, I know you can.”
Somehow San had moved to be parallel from your laying body, hovering above you as best as he could while his fingers drilled into you tight cunt.
His eyes focused on your face, the way you struggled to keep your eyes open and your eyebrows were pursed forward. There was no real rhythm to his fingers, part of him had only vaguely remembered how people fingered each other in videos. And even he knew those weren’t good examples to go off of.
“Come on, baby. I know you can cum for me one more time.”
Your mouth fell open in a silent moan, and suddenly all you could feel was San in every one of your senses. His smell, his body heat, his presence, his gaze on you… he was clouding every bit of your mental. The knot if your stomach was ready to snap, and you couldn’t even bring yourself to try and tell San that he was hitting that sweet spot. Could he even tell? You didn’t think so, but you could tell this orgasm was going to be different from all your prev-
“Look at you, holy fuck-” San began rubbing your clit quickly. “Baby, you’re fucking squirting for me.”
Your ears were ringing, and truthfully you could barely hear what San was saying. Your mind was entirely clouded, and you didn’t even have the strength to respond. Your body shuddered, and all you could muster up was weakly wrapping your arms around San and pulling him down on top of you.
“Hey, you okay?” San’s voice never failed to show his concern as he tried turning in your grasp to get a look at you.
You weakly hummed in response before speaking, trying to wrap your arms more comfortably around him.
“Feels like… feels like I’m on a cloud. Don’t want you to leave me, feels good. Here- Feels good you’re here. With me.” You rambled, fighting to keep your eyes open.
“I’m not going anywhere, baby.” San whispered, softly kissing the first piece of skin his lips could reach. He moved one of his hands to rest at your side, caressing his thumb back and forth lightly.
“Was it too much? I’m sorry, I shouldn’t have-” San mumbled into your skin.
“Shh.” San looked up at your face expectantly.
“I like this side of you, too, it was perfect, Sannie.”
He smiled, leaning back down to give you a swift kiss.
“You did good for me, by the way. And of course, always an overachiever…” There was a tilt to San’s voice as he spoke.
“Me? That’s definitely you, I was fine with not finishing after you came.”
“Oh really? Well, I wasn’t,” he playfully retorted.
“And this is why you’re mine, because you treat me so well,” you smiled, eyes still shut.
“And on that note, lemme get you cleaned up.”
“I don’t wanna take another shower right now, can we at least nap for a little before we do? I genuinely can’t feel my legs, I think.” 
“Fine, but I’m setting a timer for an hour. At least go pee.” San got up, his bare body facing away from you as he reached into one of his bags that was placed on one of the chairs in the corner of them. He walked back towards you, opening a package of wipes, gently wiping at the insides of your thighs as best as he could. He reached down to grab hold of your hand, tugging slightly to pull you up.
“An hour…” you echoed with a slight pout, looking back at San.
“Two at most.” You felt a content smile creeping on your face.
“Hold on, I’m gonna carry you, m’kay?” He reached hold of your back, lifting you so you could wrap your legs around his torso as he walked to the bathroom.
He placed you on the tile floor, stepping away and shutting the door behind him.
“I’m gonna strip the bed sheets, we might have to run into town to grab some detergent to wash… Lemme know when you’re about to come out though so I can grab your robe.” San’s head peaked through the door, giving you one last smile.
“Thank you.”
And with that he closed the door behind him.
-
You woke up to the alarm San had set going off and feeling insanely hot, your robe was exposing your naked body underneath and your legs were tangled with San’s.
In fact, most of his body was practically smothering yours and though you loved him dearly, you needed him to get off of you to cool down.  
You did your best to wiggle yourself free, but to no avail, San’s arms stayed holding you tightly.
“Why you trynna run away from me, huh?” San grumbled against your hair.
“I’m not running away, you’re literally a furnace.”
You tried kicking the blankets off with the little leg strength you had. San threw his leg over yours, pulling you as close as possible. Both of you fell into a fit of laughter, trying to squirm for freedom.
“San, let. Me. Go.” You laughed, pushing your body weight against him to free yourself from his hold.
“Never.”
“Please.”
“Nope.”
“You said we would only take a nap for two hours and then rinse off.”
“I know what I said.”
You laughed, eyebrows raised at his sudden sassiness.
“So since you know, let’s get up. You wanna run into town later, right?”
San hummed, his hand coming up from holding you to push your robe further off your back. His lips began softly kissing at your hot skin.
“Lemme have you one more time before we shower.” He grumbled, his lips now puckering to suck love bites against your shoulder. His hips pressed forward and you felt his cock begin to get hard against your lower back just above the swell of your ass.
“Seriously.” You moaned in disbelief, pushing your hips back to meet his. His teeth nipped at your skin, not hard enough to cause you any pain but enough to feel yourself getting aroused.
“I’ll make it quick, I promise.”
“Fine.” You huffed out, letting yourself relax your body into San’s, letting him touch you however he pleased.
San was right, he made it quick. He had his way with you while you guys spooned, thrusting his hips shallowly against your ass as he hit all your sweet spots. This vacation was definitely going to have both of you spent, and with San’s new found stamina, you were unsure if you were really going to be able to keep up.
-
It wasn’t long until you guys finally found the courage to get up and rinse off, deciding to finally make your way into town and grab a few things from the grocers.
“You said we needed detergent, yeah?” You said, pushing the cart down the aisle as San focused on items on the shelf.
“Yeah, detergent and then whatever snacks you want.”
“Snacks… okay, you want me to meet you in the frozen section?”
“That’s fine. I’mma grab some fruits and other stuff then head that way.”
You hummed, making your way to the other side of the store to select your items.
Five minutes, maybe ten at most, had passed until San finally made his way back to meet up with you. Reaching the cart, he dumped his items in.
“Ready?”
“Yeah let’s-” You stopped, eyes falling on two bottles of lube that San had thrown in with the rest of his items that consisted of sugary snacks and fruit.
“What?” He paused, waiting for you to finish. His eyes trailed down to what you were looking out before continuing, “Look you can never have too much, okay? Also, I made a promise when we first got here.”
And with that, San walked his way to the front of the store where the registers were, turning around briefly to motion you to follow before walking again.
-
When you guys had gotten back from the store, you both decided to put in a frozen pizza in the oven and ate quickly, finding refuge on the couch shortly after to relax. You guys had the bed sheets in the washer, currently laid up on the couch. The television played some movie that San had decided on, something about volleyball, you weren’t tracking too much to be quite frank.
You laid on top of San, feeling his heartbeat pound against your ear. His hands gently scratched against your back, as if he were to press any harder you’d break.
“Y/N?” San softly spoke, his hands stopping in place.
“Hmm..” Your eyes fought to stay open, exhaustion and content consuming your body after the day’s events.
“Everything was okay, yeah?” San’s voice trailed off, almost as if he felt embarrassed to even ask you. You knew what he was implying. You lifted your head to look him in the eyes.
“It was perfect. I’m glad you trust me, San. Seriously. And I’m so glad you let me love you the way you needed and let me show you how much I love you.”
San’s lips fell into a soft pout, he felt a lump in his throat. He didn’t say anything, instead he pulled you down for a tender kiss. It was sweet, there was no sexual intentions behind this one, just pure unadulterated love from the both of you.
“I love you, like a lot. Like for eternity, even.” San said as he pulled away from the kiss, smiling up at you.
“I love you for eternity, too.” You smiled back, giving him one last peck before laying your head back on his chest and succumbing to the sleepiness that slowly invaded your mind.
And the rest of your time on your vacation get-a-way was spent like that. Spending time with another, sharing affectionate moments and sweet words. San was true to his word, he took you on every surface in that house that he could defile you on. The kitchen counters, the table, the couch, the shower, even the stairs. He’d gone through a bottle and a half of lube since he had purchased it that first day there and you were more than sure the way he was fucking you, in all these different positions and with his stamina in mind, he was surely going to end up putting a baby in you.
One thing you had begun to realize about San though- well, a few things- was how he loved coming inside you and watching you push it out. As if he couldn’t wrap his head around that all of that seed was really his. Also that he really liked making you squirt- it wasn’t something you’d known before that you were capable of doing, so to have a guy who had very little sexual experience, make you do that, was truly mind-boggling.
After your vacation, you noticed your energy shift between each other for the better. San had passed his horny phase, and overall had just enjoyed being romantically intimate just as much as he enjoyed being sexually intimate. Not that he hadn’t been that way before, but it definitely felt more comfortable to express those sides of him naturally. You both brought out new sides of each other and to be able to express that so comfortably and safely was more than perfect.
Time had passed and yet another school year had finally come to an end, summer was approaching quickly.
“You heading back home for the summer?” San asked as you guys strolled along the trail that went through the campus park. His hands played with the ends of your hair as you walked, his eyes looking at you expectantly.
“Hmm, I thought about it, my lease ends right before summer starts so it at least gives me time to really think but, honestly I don’t wanna…”
“Come with me.”
“What?” You stopped walking, turning to look at San.
“I mean come with me for the summer. I’m going back home and we have a spare room if anything since my sister doesn’t live at the house anymore…” His voice trailed off as his hands removed themself from your hair, bringing them forward and stuffing them in his pockets.
“Well… I mean, are your parents okay with-”
“I already asked them… last month. And again last week, I didn’t tell them it was for sure though because I wasn’t sure how to bring it up to you but if you do decide to come, they’re okay with it and they’re super excited to meet you. No pressure though.” San chewed on his lower lip, avoiding your eyes.
You grabbed his wrists, taking his hands out of his pockets and bringing his hands to your lips, giving each one a soft kiss. Your eyes met his, and you found him looking back at you fondly with a faint blush creeping on his cheeks. He was trying hard to fight the smile that so desperately wanted to be on display for you and only you.
“Well, then. I would love to spend the summer with you and your family.” You pulled him forward to kiss his lips quickly, before pulling away and leading him down the trail of the park.
This upcoming summer was definitely going to be one to remember, and you were more than excited to spend it with the one you loved most.
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xhoneygirlxx · 1 year ago
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More Than Just A Dream
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best friend! Eddie Munson x fem reader
summary: Eddie can't understand why you would ever ask him a question like that.
warnings: set in modern times, mentions of cellphones and current pop culture references. swearing, insecurity issues, fluff, slight angst, Eddie being down bad for reader. friends to lovers. bad writing and grammar mistakes. not proofread bc a girl is tired. 18+ Minors please go away.
a/n: being someone who was constantly over looked, only ever being the girl that people were nice to so they could get close to my friends, i really wish i had someone who loved me. now in my twenties, i see all my friends in relationships, getting married, and having the life i want. basically i'm in my feels tonight and i'm going to pretend that i have my own personal Eddie.
You and Eddie were hanging out in his room, you mindlessly scrolling on your phone while he plucked mindlessly at his guitar, contently sitting on his bed. This wasn't uncommon for the two of you, always finding comfort in just being around one another, never caring what it was that you were doing.
"Do you think I'm pretty?"
When the question leaves your lips, Eddie is instantly confused, stopping his fingers movements on the strings he had been messing around with. Your face stayed stoic as you continued to scroll on your screen, almost like you didn't realize you said anything at all. It also confused him because it shouldn't even be a question at all.
Instead of saying the obvious answer, he did the worst thing possible, he laughs. His laughter isn't at you, it's at the stupidity of the question. Of course you're pretty, he thinks you're the most beautiful girl to ever walk the face of the planet.
You don't take his laughter to be kind, your face showing it when your lips drop down in a deep frown.
"You could've just said no, Eddie. Didn't really need you to laugh at me." Your tone is annoyed with a hint of sadness. Eddie wants to smack himself in the head, especially when he made you upset.
Quickly setting his guitar down beside the bed, Eddie's quick to lean up from where he had been sat up by the headboard of his bed, moving so now he's closer to your body that's sat opposite of his at the end.
"Honey I wasn't laughing at you, I was laughing at the question," his ringed hands move to cradle your cheeks, forcing you to look up at him, "Of course I think you're pretty. May I ask why you asked me that question?"
Although his tone is gentle, you shy away from his gaze, looking down at your phone that's still in the palm of your hand. He can see the gears turning in your head, the lie that you're trying to come up with to save yourself from whatever it is that is going on.
Shrugging your shoulders, you continue to look down at your hands, now playing with a loose string on your sweatpants.
"Baby," he coos and you melt in his hands that still hold onto the fat of your cheeks, "can you look at me?"
When you finally find the courage to look up at him, he can see the unushered tears in your eyes, the doubt that hides in your mind. Maybe it's not the best time to think this but he can't help but think how gorgeous you are, how lucky he is to be this close to see the different flecks of colors in your eyes.
"That's my girl, there she is. Now can you answer my question, love? What's goin' on in that pretty head of yours?" He moves his hands to push back your hair behind your ears, only to return one his hands to your cheek where he softly stroked it.
"I-um, I just," you let out a loud sigh, obviously overwhelmed with the emotions that are going on in your body. Eddie nods his head, a silent encouragement to continue.
"I just wanna be pretty, ya know? I just wanna be the girl that everyone falls in love with. I know it's unrealistic but I- I see all these girls on Instagram and the way that people comment all these wonderful things, and I just- I just want that so badly. These girls are so pretty and their bodies are so nice, and then there's me."
Eddie can't wrap his mind around what you just said to him. He can't fathom the idea that you can't see what he sees. He also can't help feel this incredibly disgusted with the way social media can warp a persons brain.
The rage in his body has started a wildfire, not with you but with society's expectations. He knows that you follow some of the famous socialites, having watched a few episodes of the Kardashians with you from time to time, and how you always comment about how you wished you looked like them.
There's been so many times he's heard the small insults you say about yourself, he hates that you try to play it off like a joke when deep down you're saying how you really feel.
When he wipes the tears that have since fallen from your eyes, he fights the urge to tell you everything he's been dying to tell you since the two of you became friends.
You're the girl of his dreams, the one that he wants to call his and show off to everyone to make them jealous. Every part of you is beautiful. He has dedicated the feel of your skin on his own so that when it's gone he can still feel it.
Every dip, curve, scar, and inch of your body that he has access to seeing is burned into his memory. You look like his favorite song, so perfect that it fills his heart with joy every time he sets his eyes on you.
"I wish you could see what I see." That's all that he can say, the only thing he can say without putting his friendship with you in jeopardy.
"What do you see?" Your eyebrows pull together and you look up at him with those big pretty eyes.
"Well if I'm being honest, you're the prettiest girl I've ever seen." You go to say something and he cuts you off. "Shh, let me say this. There is not one person on this earth that I think could hold a candle to you. Baby, you are so breathtaking that it hurts for me to even look at you."
"I know that the poets would just eat you up, writing line after line about you. Anyone would be lucky to love you honey, seriously you are out of everyone's league. There is not a doubt in my mind that you're gonna find someone who doesn't feel the same way, and if they don't I got a knuckle sammich comin' their way."
To emphasis his point, Eddie brings his knuckles to his fists as if he's reading for a fight. When you laugh he can't help but smile, feeling the butterflies in his stomach fly around with glee.
"Thank you Eds," wrapping your body around his middle in a tight hug, he enjoys the feeling of your warmth on his skin. Selfishly he kisses the top of your head that rests on his chest.
"No need to thank me, sweetheart. Any time you need me too I will gladly remind my girl just how beautiful she is."
Pulling away from him quicker than he likes, you crane your neck slightly to look at him. Your face is shining with the sticky tears that had fallen onto your cheeks, lips red and slightly swollen from the way you bit them, and all Eddie wants to do is take a picture.
"Do you wanna know what I think?" A sly smirk falls on your lips, a playful glint in your eye, and it makes him nervous.
"What's that?" His tone is light and playful, just like yours.
"I think that I wouldn't want just someone." You say while lightly tracing over the letters on Eddie's shirt. Looking down at you with raised eyebrows, he's sure his face is beat red.
"No?" It comes out like a whisper, so soft you almost miss it. When you shake your head, Eddie tilts his, raising an eyebrow in confusion.
"Then who do you want?"
"I want the boy who think's poets would right write line after line about me."
Pointing a finger to his chest, he mouths the words 'me?', still reeling with everything that just happened. Biting your lip to suppress the smile fighting its way on your face, you nod in agreement.
Finally when everything catches up to him, he reaches for your ribs, slightly pulling you over to lay next to him. Mounting himself on top of you, he can't help leave tiny kisses on your face, like an excited puppy who's waited all day for it's owners return.
"I've *kiss* have *kiss* been waiting *kiss* for you to *kiss* say that *kiss*" When he's finally done setting kisses on every square inch of your face, he sits up slightly to get a good look at the pretty girl underneath him.
"Well I've been waiting even longer, Mr. Eddie Munson."
"Well wait no further, baby. You're stuck with me forever."
Eddie goes back to attacking you with wet kisses, like if he stops he'll never be able to do it again. You return the favor by placing a delicate kiss on his lips.
All Eddie can hope is that this wasn't a dream because he's not sure how he'd be able to handle it.
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this is booty cheeks but im sad so let me have this lmao. also thank you for reading <3
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fishermanshook · 9 months ago
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ASK: sooo you mentioned that you wanted someone to ask for ganji or orpheus smut so here i am 😆😆 so, general ganji smut hcs? or maybe just sfw nsfw hcs of taking a bath with him? or perhaps first time hcs? Soooo many ideas
requester: @ch6douin
HOLD ME TIGHT AND DON'T LET GO
(batter , novelist x gn!reader) separate [N]SFW hc’s
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# MINOR WRITING SMUT ⚠️ , reader is gn , grammar and spelling warning
INTRO
What’s more intimate than bathing together under the moonlight? Holding each other in your arms, as the other shakes and cries from the overstimulation you’ve caused to their body. Seeing you, their darling, twitch, and moan from the pleasure they give you is something they need engraved in their mind and memory.
How can they help themselves when you look so stunning right now?
꒰wc꒱ 1.3k
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The Batter
SFW
Getting close to the Batter is an accomplishment in itself, but establishing a relationship with him earns you some bragging rights. Ganji’s emotional (and physical?) walls are literal fortresses in themself, so to have a relationship with him takes time, patience, and communication. The more the two of you talk, the fewer bumps there will be.
Once the two of you start dating it will be a lot smoother from there on out.
In the early stages of your relationship, if you were trying to bathe alongside him, Ganji is automatically shutting it down. He’s not comfortable doing something that he finds so intimate already and he’d rather do it later in the relationship.
When he does find your relationship solidified, he asks you if you would like to join him in the bath. Where the sun pours in from the windows and gleams across your skin. It feels nice to be this close to his, with your chest against his. Skin to skin. Heart to heart.
Ganji might ask you to wash his hair, or, as long as your hands aren't wet, run your fingers through his hair. It's such a soothing thing for the man that he could fall asleep if he weren’t in the bath.
But on certain and rare occasions, the Batter may or may not find it harder than usual to keep focus. Especially when your ass is pressed right against his— oh god. He might explode if he doesn’t have his way with you right now.
[N]SFW
“Fuck, Ganji! Yes right there!” the words spilled out of your mouth as the Batter pumped his dick in and out of you. You should’ve become numb to any feeling down there, but it’s your 5th round and you swear the twitching of his cock becomes even more prominent with every thrust.
The Batter seems to have an unwavering stamina, but you sense his tiredness growing in every thrust. Yet he keeps it up. He can’t get the image of you bouncing up and down on him out of his brain, and he wishes to soak up the memory and feeling before your touch eventually wilts away.
“Tell me I feel good, love,” Ganji whispers in your ear with that deep, raspy voice that you love. It never fails to send chills down your spine as you moan out his name and praise him like it’s going out of style.
“You so amazing darling,! Fill me up so good, ugh please keep going,” you groan out as his name continues to spill from your mouth like a mantra. You take him so well, your eyes filled with lust and love.
Ganji senses that you're about to reach your climax, and he’s not far behind you. It seems only now you realize that his hips have started to meet yours in a lustful rhythm neither of you want to end. With a final kiss, you moan out his name one last time before coming.
“Yes darling— come for me,” Ganji says as you come undone on his cock, coating his in your essence once more. The Batter eventually thrusts into you sucking in a breath of air as he follows suit.
The aftermath leaves both of you tired and drowsy. Using the last bit of your energy, you help clean up Ganji and yourself before making the trek back to your shared bed.
“I love you,” Ganji states as he lays a gentle kiss on your forehead. You hummed back in response, closing your eyes to get some well-deserved rest.
Aftercare is an obvious must. It doesn’t matter how tired he is Ganji will help clean you up. So while it doesn’t explicitly state that here, he did make sure to help wipe you down.
Ganji just wants to make you feel good, but also won’t deny pleasure as a response. As long as you feel like you're going to burst, he’ll feel good too.
The Novelist
SWF
The Novelist isn’t one to trust easily, let alone fall in love as quickly as he did. He’s quick to judge others on their behavior and who they surround themselves with. You must’ve made an amazing first impression on him, as it’s become a lasting one even months later.
Orpheus finds himself confessing to you using a heartfelt letter that took him weeks to write. Don’t believe him? Then maybe the crumbled drafts decorating his bedroom floor will convince you otherwise.
Regarding bathing together, he’s not entirely against the idea. Orpheus thinks just that preferably, he’d want to do it later on in the relationship when trust has further been built. He’s not rushing to have you with him in the bath, and it doesn’t seem like you are either.
Although, he can’t deny the pleasant thought of holding you oh so close to him. A glass of red wine is held in your hands as he massages out any areas of tension across your back and other areas. To have you wash his hair and try (miserably) to keep the soap out of his eyes.
It’s all adorable to think of, which leaves him to inviting you into the tub more often than not. As you lay on his chest, hands intertwined, he can’t stop thinking about how lucky he is to have you.
This time though, the rose petals and candles that decorate the bathroom floor tell a different story. Leaving you to wonder if Orpheus had ever written something like this before.
[N]SFW
Orpheus wants the both of you to feel good, which is why he refuses to stop when you're begging him to. He works away at your neck first, covering it in hickeys as his fingers twist and pinch your nipples.
“Orpheus please— need you so badly,” you whine into his ear as he pulls away from your hickey-covered neck to face you.
“But darling I thought you wanted this,” Orpheus states as he presses kisses along your jawline before finally moving inside you. Drawing a low moan from you as he pushes himself inside. “Shit, always so tight for me no matter how many times I do this huh?”
It doesn’t matter how many times the two of you do this, he always makes you feel too good for words to describe. He touches all the sensitive parts, kisses all the right spots, and always hits the right spot. His accuracy is precise and has you coming in no time.
Your wet hands glide through his hair and pull his head towards yours. In other situations, he’d pull your hand away and sulk because “now my hair is soaking”. Now though, he wouldn’t want anything else but to have his face against yours. To listen to the melodies that fall from your mouth. To hear his name fall from your lips.
“Come on daring, lemme hear more of you.” Orpheus managed to grunt out as he pounds into you, the water and soap around you creating waves around you.
“Feel so good—Orpheus I want all of you!” You shout out as you scratch and claw at his back. Your neck and collarbone are littered with hickeys and warm spots from where his soft lips were earlier.
Sooner or later, you're gushing from his cock. Your back arched in a way that has him drooling from his mouth and shooting loads into you that feel like they'll never stop.
Once the situation has calmed down, he'll help clean up and tuck the two of you into bed. With a final kiss to the lips and a shared "I love you" goodnight, you two drift far off into sleep.
Orpheus is a gentleman at heart, but despite that, he'll tease you a bit before giving you what you want. It's always worth it in the end and always makes the experience just 10 times more pleasurable for both of you. 
note: hi poookieeee,,,, apology’s for how long this was left in my drafts 🌝 hope your happy with this sjsjajakqllemsc
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(2024)©️fishermanshook — do not steal, translate, plagiarize, or repost my work on any other platform
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sapphic-kpop-fics · 23 days ago
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Bad Influence (Shin Ryujin x Reader)
Masterlist
le sserafim!reader
fluff (angst if you count arguing with leader chaewon angst😔), first kiss 🥰🥰
hey besties! i wrote this while i had signal and did not proofread so spelling mistakes and grammar errors are happening but i wanted to post something for you guys! hope you enjoy my first non smau thing on here!
if you want to see this relationship/this Ryujin in more then send requests for “bad influence!Ryujin x Reader”!
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You loved being an idol, especially when you get to do it with your best friends but sometimes sitting around a music show for hours isn’t what you want to do every day. Rehearsals, performances, and socializing for promotion purposes. it all just felt mundane and repetitive, well until she walked up to you.
She being Ryujin from the ITZY, your senior though she wasn’t much older than you. You had to admit the girl was incredibly attractive and you found yourself staring at her at promotions and award shows where you were both in attendance, i mean who wouldn’t. Sometimes she would even return your glances, and could swear you saw a blush on her cheeks along with a little smile.
You were walking through the halls, after grabbing a snack to find your members, when you felt a hand touch you on your shoulder. Turning around you’re met with the dark eyes and kind smile of Ryujin, her face flushed, she stutters over her words.
“h-hi. I-i’m Ryujin.” she finally gets out, mentally cursing at herself.
“hi. i know who you are, i’m y/n.” you say, a bit timidly but you reach out a hand for her to shake which does makes you feel too formal so you just drop it causing the older girl to laugh a bit.
“yeah i know who you are too..” she says, a few moments of silence goes by before you both pipe up at the same time.
“can i have you number?”
the same sentence coming from both of your mouths at the same time, causing you both to laugh. Ryujin hands you her phone so you can put in your number, as you do for her.
“i’ll uh text you later.” she says with a shy smile before walking away, not without stealing glances towards you.
That’s when you finally notice the four other girls at the end of the hallway, watching the interaction, all of them looking away pretending to be busy when you meet their eye but celebrating with Ryujin when she reaches them, causing you to smile.
Turning around to continue your route to your groups green room, you run into a body, they’re shorter than you so you guess quickly who it is.
“hi chaewon.” you mutter out before backing away a bit.
“what was that?” your leader says while looking down at the other group down the hall.
“oh, Ryujin wanted my number so we could be friends.”
“just friends?” Chaewon squints.
you blush, the question catching you off guard along with the stern look on her face.
“relax y/n i’m kidding. i’m glad you’re making new friends.” she put a arm around you. “now let’s get back to the room, we have rehearsal soon.”
sitting in your green room as you wait for rehearsal, you feel your phone buzz.
ryu🧸
hi
you smile at the contact name and at the quickness of her first text, sending butterflies through you.
you
hi
i thought you were gonna text me later tonight?
ryu🧸
i know
i couldn’t wait
you
cute.
you feel yourself get more confident over text when you’re not face to face with the intimating woman.
From then on you starting texting practically every second of the day, every day of the week. the messages turned more flirty as time went on, selfies and compliments shared often, pet names slipping out every once and a while. Though you hadn’t been able to see her in person since you got her number due to conflicting schedules. You had only actually met her once, yet you miss her with every fiber of your being. you were falling and hard, little did you know Ryujin was doing the same thing.
One night you were in your room reading when your phone buzzes, you don’t even have to look to know who it is, you smile as you see the name on your screen.
ryu🧸
hey
what are you doing?
you
just reading before bed.
why?
three dots pop up telling you she’s typing but that suddenly stops. Not even a second later your phone rings, you answer without even letting the first ring out, eager to hear her voice.
“hello?” you answer, trying to sound normal and not as if you’ve been waiting for her to call.
“hi.” she reply’s, you can hear the small smile in her voice.
it goes silent for a few moments.
“did you need something?”
“oh- i- uh-.” ryujin stutters before quietly muttering, “i just wanted to hear your voice.”
you feel as if you can’t breathe, there’s a softness and genuineness to her voice that you’d never heard anyone talk with before. it made your heart flutter, a smile growing on your face.
“yeah?”
“yeah.” her voice is quieter, growing more shy with her confession. “to be honest, i miss more than just your voice.”
“me too, ryu.”
her cheeks heat up at the use of the nickname, especially hearing it now in your voice for the first time.
“sneak out.” the raven haired girl says after some silence.
“what?!? Ryujin, it’s midnight!”
“sneak out. let’s do something. i want to see you.” she rambles with excitement.
“says the one five years into their career.” you pause. “what if we get caught?” you ask with your resolve becoming non existent.
“we won’t. we can wear masks and hats, plus i know a secret little place we can go.” the older one obviously trying to convince you to come see her. you stay silent, thinking of the consequences if you get caught but then you think of Ryujin and her face, and her smile, and her lips.
“fine. but you better be outside my dorm in 10 minutes or you miss your chance.” you say, trying to sound serious but some excitement slips in your voice.
“done.” she says, her smile growing as she stands up and rushes out of her own dorm and ending the call. she had your address as she had planned to visit but her schedule never allowed time.
you laugh at her before putting on a makeshift disguise, A mask, sunglasses, a bucket hat and a jacket. you tip toe to the front door of your shared dorm with yunjin and chaewon , making sure they’re still in their rooms. Turning the knob slowly before exiting, closing it just as slowly as the you opened it. you turn around to see Ryujin already standing there, hands on her knees bent over, breathing as if she’d been holding her breath for years. Clearly she had ran here, taking your ultimatum very seriously, but you knew you never would’ve held her to it you would’ve waited hours if she needed.
She finally looks up, meeting your eyes that were already on her. Smiles on both of your faces, though yours turns into a teasing one.
“miss me that much?” you say playfully.
she doesn’t even reply she just walks to you and pulls you into a bone crushing hug. Your body automatically relaxes as you rest your head on her shoulder, you breath hitting her neck slightly causing her to have goosebumps. Pullinh away she grabs your hand and pulls you with her, interlocking your fingers as she does so.
“are you gonna tell me where we’re going?” you ask breaking the silence.
“nope. it’s a secret.” she smiles while squeezing your hand tighter.
you continue to walk hand in hand for about 10 more minutes, in silence just enjoying the presence of the other, listening to each others calm breathes. Until you finally reach a park, not such a secret you thought before she turned to a little clearing in the trees on the edge of the park, a path appearing that you wouldn’t have even known was there if Ryujin didn’t walk towards it, as she does so she brings out a flashlight from her pocket. Walking down the path there’s a small open area enough to fit a small blanket on the ground, which Ryujin pulls out from somewhere as if she’d had planned to bring you here before tonight.
She only lets go of your hand to lay the blanket onto the grass, flattening it out with her hand before sitting and holding her hand out for you to grab and pulling you down to sit next to her. Putting her arm around your shoulders she pulls you down so you’re laying next to her, looking up at the stars. Intertwining your hanfs and lifting them with the stars as a backdrop, she takes a picture of your joined hands. Turning your head you find her already looking at you or more so your lips but when youre facing her she stares into your eyes, feeling the air get knocked out of your lungs by the intensity and emotions in them, it feels like you’re burning, but you cant look away.
Ryujin suddenly sits up and you’re so locked into her eyes that you subconsciously follow her, your eyes never breaking contact.
“can i-“ she starts before you cut her off.
“yes.”
she puts a hand on your cheek, swiping her thumb across before leaning in and closing the gap between your lips. it starts off gentle, Ryujin’s care seeping throughout it, but need starts to creep in and her hand moves from your face to your hair where she tugs slightly, though you’re fighting for air the only thing that makes you pull away is the sound of your phone blowing up. pulling your phone out you see a bunch of notifications, not a good sign. they’re mostly from yunjin which isnt worrying at first.
jen 💞
hey where are you?
chaewon is looking for you, i looked in your room but you’re gone.
i held her off for now but you need to get back before she sees that you’re gone.
until you look at the other notifications, then you see it.
chae🐶
10 new messages
chae🐶
5 missed calls.
fuck.
“fuck.” you say, mostly to yourself as Ryujin just looks confused and concerned. you start standing and walking away, the older girl following closely behind trying to catch up.
“hey!” she says, barely raising her voice “wait up.” , eventually catching up with a slight jog and placing her hands on your shoulders which stops your movement.
“whats wrong?” she asks, once again her overwhelming care filling you.
“my members saw that i left.” you say “specifically chaewon. my leader. who’s going to kill me.”, you find yourself getting panicked which Ryujin notices.
“hey, its okay.” she rubs her hands up and down your arms, trying to calm you (you’d never admit it but it works). “look if anything this is my fault, tell them i was the one who made you do it. ill take the blame.”, the seriousness in her eyes scared you.
with a nod you both start walking again, when you finally get back to your dorm Chaewon is standing outside the door with her arms crossed and a blank look on her face, along with Yunjin who looked to be holding her laugh in as she knew there was a lecture brewing in her leaders head. Ryujin walks you to the door and sheepishly meets Chaewon’s eyes which were practically burning her alive before dropping your hand. Choosing to look away and at you with a small smile, a slight wave.
“bye” she whispers before practically running away to escape the lecture.
Chaewon doesn’t even say anything which scares you just opens the door while staring at you and walks in, a definite sign to follow her without arguments. Yunjin stays behind until you pass by, at which point she chuckles a bit.
“dumbass.” she mutters.
“fuck you.” you whisper as you pass, making sure to flip her off behind your back.
As you walk in, the other members are also here to watch the show of you getting scolded. Sakura sits with a disappointed look that makes you want to call your mom and say sorry, while the younger members of the group are smiling and trying not to laugh as Yunjin was. Chaewon walked into your room standing by the door and waiting for you to catch up, closing and locking the door when you entered. She points at your bed silently telling you to sit, which you do. It’s silent for a couple more minutes, but shes staring at you, blankly. People say the leader is cute when shes angry but they hadn’t seen this part of her, the part where her protectiveness of her members takes over completely.
“what were you thinking?” she finally breaks the silence, “or were you even doing that at all when you decided to sneak out in the middle of night, to go who knows where.”
“it was just a park chae.”
“just a park? what if people saw you?”
“then they would’ve seen that i was just at the park.”
“with Ryujin?”
you don’t answer. its not that Chaewon didn’t approve of your budding relationship, she just didn’t want you to be reckless which is precisely what you were being.
“and what were you guys doing at this park?”
“talking.” even though there was no words exchanged, as your lips were preoccupied.
“right.” she scoffs, “shes a bad influence.“
only now is when you look up to meet her eyes.
“what? no shes not.”
“you’ve never been this reckless, not before her.”
“i chose to go, because i wanted to. okay? not because she wanted me to. it was my choice.”
“fine.” she takes a deep breath seemingly trying to replace her mood and tone, “look, i dont give a fuck if you go out in the middle of the night, as long as you’re safe and dont het caught, all im asking is that you tell me when and where you’re going. got it?”
“got it.”
and with that your leader leaves your room, leaving you alone with your thoughts. your mind runs a mile a minute until it’s interrupted by a buzz, a text message.
ryu🧸
im sorry i got you in trouble, i shouldn’t have made you sneak out.
i enjoyed seeing you though.
…..and kissing you.
you
its okay, i wanted to so its not your fault.
it was worth it to see you again.
we should definitely do that again sometime (the kissing)
you laugh a bit as you type the last words, as does Ryujin as she reads them.
ryu🧸
oh i was going to ask before we got interrupted.
do you want to be my girlfriend?
you freeze, heart beating out of your chest. a couple minutes pass as you try and shake the shock off.
ryu🧸
im sorry
is that too soon
i shouldnt have asked
forget i said it
you
wait!
yes of course i do
i was just shocked
ryu🧸
thank god.
so when can i see my girlfriend again? 🥰
this woman will be the death of you.
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pandora-writes-one-piece · 1 month ago
Note
Happy, happy birthday Pandora! <3 I wish you all the health and happiness!
"I’m not saying I like you, but if a sea beast ate you, I might cry a little." (that prompt is just so cute ahhh) with Eustass Kid please - fem!reader, sfw
Isn't it a cute prompt anon? I had fun with it! Especially with this firecracker of a Captain! Thank you soooo much for the birthday wishes and I hope you enjoy this! ❤️
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Source for pic
Drowning in Flames
Word Count: 1652
Tags: fem!reader; cursing; feelings; love confessions;
Special Warning: English is not my first language, I apologise for any possible spelling or grammar mistakes.
Summary: You saved Kid from drowning and your thanks involves scrubbing the deck.
Tag List: @rosidaze @beachaddict48 @armiliadawn @jintaka-hane @sprinkklz @baby5555 @hopelesslover06 @mars-mizuko @sleepykittycx @nerium-lil @eustasscapitankid
|Masterlist|
“Reckless idiot! Stupid moron! Thoughtless imbecile.”
“Oi! I’m still yer Captain! Watch yer filthy mouth before I wash it with soap!”
Water puddles gather around your feet and each step you take makes a sploshing sound. Your eyeliner is running and you blame your freaking idiot captain for it. Okay, not all of it. You could’ve been less stingy and bought the waterproof eyeliner like - clearly - Eustass fucking Kid did. But the rest was his fault.
“I don’t give a shit!” You’re standing up on the deck and he’s sitting down, but you still need to look up to meet his eyes. “You almost drowned you reckless-...” Kid arches his eyebrow and growls. “Captain!” A hiss leaves your lips just as the salt from the water makes contact with a cut from the sword fight you were engaged in before having to save your captain’s ass!
“So did ya!” He shouts, throwing his arms in the air and splashing more water over the deck. 
You could make out the faint sounds of Killer ordering the crew around so you could manoeuvre away from the wreckage of the pirate ship you all had just annihilated.  
“I only almost drowned because you fell in the water like an idiot! A heavy, fat-assed, idiot whom I don’t have the strength to save from fucking drowning!”
“Oi, lass! I will tell ya this one more time,” Kid rises, looking more menacing by the inch, and leans down until his face is right in front of yours. “Ya call me an idiot again and I’ll have to punish ya.”
A mischievous smile curves your lips upwards and you cross your arms over your chest in a clear teasing manner, trying to push your captain further and see where it gets you. “Oh, really, Captain? And what’s the punishment?”
Eustass Kid’s unhinged grin should’ve given you a hint of what’s coming. 
It did not.
-*-
“Fucking Captain. I save his ass  from drowning and I have to scrub the freaking deck. Figures.” You keep muttering between clenched teeth. As soon as the Doc patched you up, Heat handed you a rag, a bucket and a mop, telling you Kid ordered you to leave the deck glistening.
He didn’t even have the decency to tell you himself!
You almost drowned trying to save his heavy ass from the freezing, relentless sea, and this is the thanks you get? 
“Fucking glistening? It’s gonna be fucking perfect! You’re gonna be able to eat off this shit.”
And you mean it too. Even when you crack a third nail by scrubbing too hard.
-*-
Dinner time comes and goes and you are still scrubbing. There are no more nails left to crack or break. Your hands are red and raw and your knees are bruised and have definitely seen better days.
There's a moment when you think you might have reopened that slash in your leg, but it stops bleeding after a while so you shrug it off. You’re not going to be the first one to cave.
When the stars are high up in the sky and the moon is casting its glow on the deck, you fall on your butt, kick the bucket to the side and sigh in satisfaction as your back hits the balustrade. 
“Fucking glistening. Look at that reflection! I can count the stars without looking at the sky.” 
A pained grunt leaves your lips as you start to feel sore and tired, cramped and cranky. A heated battle followed by almost drowning and a thorough scrubbing of the deck does that to you. 
“It just took ya all day, lass.”
Fuck.
“Captain. I hope you’re happy.” You close your eyes and rest your head against the railing, exhaustion seeping in through every bone of your body. You don’t have to open your eyes to feel him settling down near you.
“I’m fucking pissed.”
A moment of silence surrounds you before a chuckle emerges from your lips. It starts as a soft snicker followed by a snort, but soon evolves into something you can’t control and you laugh out loud.
“Glad to be of service.” Kid grunts, clearly not amused. “How’re ya feeling?”
“Like I died. Except not really, because everything hurts.” A groan leaves your lips as Kid places his flesh arm on top of your shoulders and pulls you against his body. 
“Ya did good, lass.”
A stubborn tear prickles behind your eyelids and you bury your head against Kid’s body. The scent of metal, oil and sea makes you want to cry, but you’ll be damned if you do that. 
“You almost drowned!” Your whine is pathetic and desperate. You don’t really care.
“But I didn’t.” He chuckles softly, or as softly as he can.
“Now you’re amused? Seriously?” You remove your head from the crook of his neck, your hand grabbing his shirt as your eyes pin him, anger written all over them. “You almost died! Do I have to spell it out for you?”
You’ve never been so afraid in your life before. Somehow, in the midst of the fight, Kid tripped and fell overboard. He was being so reckless with his attacks that it was bound to happen. Everyone was so busy with their own fights that no one noticed. So, you didn’t even think twice before jumping after him.
Obviously dragging his heavy, unconscious ass out of the water was the most tiresome and dreadful experience of your life.
Not to mention the panic and despair clawing at your chest. The possibility of losing the man you love to the clutches of the unforgiving sea. You only saved him by pure luck and adrenaline, there was no other explanation. 
“Aww, look at ya so worried about me, lass.” His hand grabs your chin as his playful eyes mock your tearful ones.
“Fuck off.” You brush his metal hand away and cross your arms over your chest, staring into the sky to blink away tears. 
“Ya like me. Admit it.”
There's this weird dance between you and Kid: he flirts and you avoid it, turning the conversation to safer topics or actually fleeing the scene; Then when you flirt he avoids you, by being gruff and bossing you around.
You know there are polls running around the crew, betting on when one of you will finally cave and fess up. Some are only about how long until you fuck each other. Others are about who will kill whom first. 
You love him, that’s the truth. 
But you’ll be damned if you’ll admit it.
Crinkling your nose and placing a hand on your chin, you say whimsically: "Well, I’m not saying I like you, but if a sea beast ate you, I might cry a little…” You shrug, avoiding the real topic of the conversation. “That’s the only reason I saved you.”
Kid pins you under his fierce gaze and you shift uncomfortably. It’s like he’s reading into your soul. 
“What?” You add, not sure how to respond to his stare. 
“Yer lying.” He leans forward and the sound that leaves your lips is half-squeak, half-weird-horn-like-sound. 
“The fuck would I lie about?” You squirm again under his gaze and try to move, but his metal arm grabs your chin, keeping you in place, challenging you. 
“Yer lying.” He repeats.
“Fine!” You relent, an urgency in your voice. “I would cry a lot! Happy?”
He leans in again and the distance between you is so small that you can smell rum and chocolate on his breath. 
“Better. Yer still lying. That’s not the only reason ya jumped into the water for me, is it lass?” Each word is a caress against your lips, a promise of something more, a plea to confess. 
Yet you don’t. 
“You're my captain.”
“Not enough.”
“The crew needs you.”
“That’s not it.”
“Killer would be devastated.”
“Try a little harder, lass.”
“Heat-...” He interrupts you with a pinch to your chin and a growl.
“Yer pissing me off again, the truth, lass!”
“Fine!” You yell in his face, your cheeks turning red as your chest heaves with shallow, nervous breaths. “I need you! I would be devastated! I would miss you! I love you!” Inhaling a gasp at the sudden confession, you purse your lips, trying to trap the words inside, but they have already escaped. 
Kid’s shit-eating grin travels through you like a wildfire that burns and destroys everything in its wake. It's powerful, it's raging, it's burning. It speaks to your soul and leaves you in a shaking, trembling mess. 
“Finally, the truth.” His metal hand releases your chin and, for a moment, you think he’s getting up to leave. Your heart skips a beat, thinking about the vulnerability of your words and how he’s going to dismiss them so quickly until…
The cold of his metal hand against your nape does nothing to cool off the heat of his scorching kiss. His lips crash into yours, demanding, hungry and commanding. A little nudge from his flesh arm has you climbing his lap in a desperate embrace as both of you deepen the connection. 
After a moment he pulls back and you're left panting and dazed, your eyes lost in his, your heart pounding so hard against your chest that you fear it might explode. 
“I love ya too, lass. Don’t ever jump in the sea again without my permission.”
The wildfire that is Kid may burn everything in its path, but the embers left behind don’t fade out. They keep sparking to life, burning bigger, hotter and more dangerously than the previous fires. 
“Not even to save your ass from a sea beast?”
He chuckles before he gets up, settling you over his shoulder, ready to take this somewhere else. 
“Especially not to save my ass from a sea beast. I will never die, lass. Burn that into yer pretty little head, will ya?”
“Aye, aye, Captain.”
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writingescapades · 16 days ago
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Book Worm, Avid Learner Reader
A\N: You're a bookworm and avid learner. How does your fishy deal with that?
Sorry for any typos, grammar or syntax mistakes. I had a long day and am super tired.
Rafayel enjoys reading, but he does not have a regular habit. Imagine his surprise when he found out just how much you enjoy reading.
His exasperated look when, upon opening your kitchen cabinets, he’s faced with stacks of books, one on top of another, ready to come falling down with one wrong move. Of course, you know how to get books in and out without an avalanche occurring. He laughs when he sees the one cabinet you did dedicate to actual food.
Likes to accompany you when you acquire new books. Whether it’s from the library or a store, Rafayel likes to see what new interests have captured your attention. Sometimes he’ll comment or provide a recommendation, but really, he’s excited to see what new thoughts emerge from your reads
Does not buy you books just because you enjoy them. Reading is another form of art. There are books you enjoy and books you won’t, and he doesn’t want to provide you with books you’d dislike. He also doesn’t want to burn you with the chore of reading something just because someone gave it to you. So he tends to leave you to your literary world. But he’s watching. If he notices your preference for a specific author or topic, you might just find a little surprise awaiting you on after a long day.
LOVES having you read to him while he paints. He enjoys hearing your voice as white noise, and pays attention to what you’re reading. If you stop reading to reflect on a passage or ask him his thoughts, he’s quick to respond. A lot of laughter occurs in these moments, but so do a lot of deep conversations that leave both your souls satisfied. Sometimes what you’re reading to him or your conversations end up appearing somewhere in his paintings.
Sometimes, when he’s experiencing an artistic block. He closes his eyes and asks you to read to him. Using your voice and his mind as a guide, he lets his inhibitions go and just paints.
Has done a photography series called “Dating a Reader” where it’s just candid shots of you reading a book on different days. The passage of time as the books gets read. The notes and tabs you keep. The light in your eyes as you jabber on about something in the book, and the final picture, his most favourite. When you finish your book, your head turned towards him, finally giving him attention, all the while, an arm outstretched towards the next book.
Rafayel is impressed by intelligence. So when he sees that you are a walking encyclopedia, he’s hooked. He loved pointing to any random object and just asking you what you know about it. He especially loves it when your reading provides you information on art. It makes it easier for him to communicate what he verbally cannot express. You’re not shallow with your observations and questions like the people who attend his art shows. There is a genuine curiosity that he cannot help but feed. It makes him feel truly seen by you, truly remembered. Also just loves it when you go off on tangents or provide well thought out answers to questions from people who are clearly trying to put you down. Has a very “that’s my spouse” moment, even though you’re not married. Not yet.
Reading makes one develop a love for learning, and you’re no exception. Rafayel doesn’t attempt to match your learning drive, but he does challenge you. Always prompting you to think of things in a different light or plays the devil’s advocate to present an alternative view. You know it’s his way of showing he cares about your passions. His way of showing that they are not just things about you or something he has to put up with, but rather something he wants you to continually develop alongside your relationship.
Despite this, he still becomes reserved and hesitant when it comes to Lemurians. He knows your curious. Dying, even to see his Lemurian form and experience the ocean from his eyes. But he can’t open that world to you just yet. In thanks for your patience, he indirectly feeds your knowledge by showing you what humans have misunderstood about Lemurians. Hoping, that your intelligence and curiosity will drive you to figuring things out on your own; and half scared of what you might do once you place the final piece.
While he might grumble and whine about you giving your books more attention then him, Rafayel would NEVER make you choose between him and your books. He knows it’s a package deal, much like how his erratic lifestyle and shadowy sides where sides of him you openly accepted. Though you live apart, he still has a library ready to be filled by you. He kind of hopes it might tempt you to move in because how can you say no to your own library?
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teez-the-time · 10 months ago
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Choi San, Wolf Warrior
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Pairing: Warrior! San x Chief's daughter! Fem! Reader
Genre: fantasy, action, romance, angst
Synopsis: Ten years ago, your best friend San promised his eternal love to you. Now, the danger of his oath creeps through the both of you, and he has to bear the weight of his words. No matter what his fate will be, you must remember that he is the Wolf Warrior.
Warnings: Blood, wounds, death (animals die, I'm so sorry), weapons, cursing, San is fucking RIPPED, reader doesn't do much (sorry again), way too much flashbacks and monologuing (sorry x3, but I do not know how to stop), sappy af.
Wc: 7.8k
Taglist: @darkdayelixer
A/N. Well, it's finally here. This is officially my first fanfic posted here. Do I believe this is my best work? No. Do I care? Maybe, but I appreciate any feedback that you might have (please take into account that English is not my first language, so I rely in grammar checkers and that stuff). I'm not sure if I should keep the second person format, but you tell me what you think. Again, I'm open to suggestions and kind criticism. If the story sucks, sorry not sorry.
Once again, I'm eternally gratefull for the support I've received in this platform. Whatever you need, my DMs are always open.
XOXO -May
A little treat for those who liked the story.
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Your tribe had a sacred tradition.
The first hunt is the most sacred; dedicated to whom you thank your life for.
The best hunt is the most important; dedicated to whom you’d die for.
That is why you couldn’t help but tremble while looking at San down below.
Even if he had clearly announced his decision to embark on the journey no more than a couple of months ago, nothing could have prepared your heart.
Not even kneeling alongside your father and your mother at a higher ground, far away from where he stood, could you escape the power radiating from his stance. Even his posture was perfect; perfectly still and elegant, like a wolf just like the one he had marked with ink on his chest. His eyes looked up, and you knew your Sanie was long gone.
He was Choi San, the Wolf Warrior.
The drums started beating in an ancestral rhythm; one you had heard in too many unsuccessful attempts. Men and women below hollered and twirled their bodies to the music, almost in a spiritual trance brought by the excitement of the hunt. The sound got louder and louder in your chest, so hard that it felt like a second heart. Your hands were shaking and you couldn’t help the shivers that ran several times through your spine. You just kept praying for it to be over.
And just as they had started, the drums ceased as your father rose as the chief of the village. He, too, didn’t feel like your father anymore, his hierarchical title far outweighed the one of father right now. You couldn’t decipher his expression, no longer familiar to you.
“Choi San”, his voice boomed through the whole village, “why are you here today?”
To you, San didn’t look intimidated one bit. “I’ve returned to fulfill my promise made sixty-two days ago, in this very place.”
This was all part of the ceremony, nothing more than a formality, but your heart fluttered with San’s words. But still, you knew he was wrong. No, he didn’t make that promise sixty-two days prior. He had made it way before that when you both were young kids.
He had promised to marry you ten years ago, at age twelve.
But your father didn’t find it that endearing. “An oath like that can’t be made by anyone. Are you sure you will be able to keep it?”.
San didn’t fall for the taunting. “Absolutely, sir.”
“Are you sure? Do you even know the consequences?”
Everyone knew them, even more San. “Yes, sir. I know them.”
“Are you willing to go through them then? Even if it means your death?”
With that, San let out a grin. “Especially if it means my death…sir.”
Then, the chief let go of the mocking stance he had tried and became solemn again. For the briefest second, you had hoped San stepped down, but you also knew him like the back of your hand. You knew he never backed down from a challenge.
Your father cleared his throat. “Very well, then. Seeing your determination to proceed, I’ll remind you once more of the rules.”
The few whispers and hushed voices that had been going around since the start finally came to a halt. The newfound silence made your head spin and your palms shake even more.
Gods, you prayed, don’t let harm come to my San. Please give him my strength and my will if he needs them.
“Rule number one. You have only one chance. If it’s lost, it’s lost. Gone forever.”
“Rule number two. You will not receive aid from anyone or anything. The village will only intercede if the hunt doesn’t finish with the beast’s death.”
“Rule number three. You will only carry one weapon of your choice and no armor. Any of those will deem the attempt failed, and you will lose your only chance.”
“Rule number four. The hunt only stops after one of you is dead.”
While your father talked, San seemed unfazed. Even if he already knew the rules, it made you uneasy to not know what he was thinking. You felt the urge to run to where he stood, grab his hand, and smooth out the crease on his brow that always popped up when he was thinking hard.
You yearned for nothing more than to be by his side.
“Choi San,” now your father spoke in a warning tone, “dare to break the rules, and you will face consequences bigger than what you can imagine. I will make sure of that.”
Not once had San looked intimidated, and that put your heart at ease (just a tiny bit, if you are being honest).
“I understood perfectly, sir.” San had always respected your father as a chief, so he always tried to keep his composure despite the adrenaline in his veins making him want nothing more than to begin with the hunt. But he had to remain polite, especially now that he was trying to become his successor.
“Good,” the chief stated plainly. “If there’s nothing else to say…let the hunt begin!”
The drums resumed in a frenetic rhythm, making your heart race once more. Nevertheless, below where you sat, San seemed pumped by it. He let the thick fur coat he wore fall to the ground, exposing his naked torso and ripped pants. You knew he did it to prove he wore nothing to protect him, but you couldn’t the blush that crept to your cheeks.
“Holy shit, that was hot” you murmured unintentionally. You looked to your left to see if your parents heard. Your father didn’t appear to have listened to you, concentrated on his duty as referee, but your mother let out a snort. You shot her a glare and she tried to suppress her laughter.
Trying to appear unfazed, you looked back at San. He was now holding a beautiful sword, which you knew like the back of your hand. The hilt was golden and decorated with flowers and power symbols. A short inscription written at the butt.
Choi San, the Wolf Warrior.
It was barely more than his name, but San had spent a fortune having it engraved in the shape of your handwriting. You smiled at the memory of a sixteen-year-old San running to show you his new possession.
“Y/N! Y/N!” you heard your name being shouted from behind you. When you turned, it was San running towards you at full speed, holding a piece of fabric in his hands. He finally reached you, showing his dimpled smile. “Geez, why do you have those ears if you can't even listen when one is shouting at you?”
You rolled your eyes. “Oh, shut it. Not my fault you are so out of breath that I couldn’t understand shit of what you were shouting.”
“I was not-!” He looked like he wanted to bicker, again, with you, but he cut himself short. “It doesn’t matter, look what I got!” He proceeded to remove part of the folded fabric, exposing a shiny object. The blade of a sword. You let out a gasp and he chuckled. “Beautiful, isn’t it? But there’s more.”
He uncovered the rest of the weapon, and your eyes fell on the golden inscription. The letters were masterfully carved on the metal, so much it took you a moment to realize it was written in your handwriting.
“Is this…?” You didn’t even finish your sentence, and San already knew what you were trying to say.
“Yes. Custom-made from the best welder in town. It cost me a fortune, but it’s worth it.” San was grinning like an idiot at what he thought was an accomplishment.
Nevertheless, that didn’t sit right with you (even though you couldn’t deny that your heart was racing like a horse). “Are you dumb?! Why are you spending your money on dumb things like this?”
Your heart broke a little when you saw his smile falter. “What are you saying? Of course, it’s not dumb!”
“Yes, it is!”
“No, it 's not!”
“I said, yes it is!”
He frowned and grabbed your hand. “No, it’s not. Wanna know why? Because every time I wield it and see the hilt, I’ll be reminded of what I have back home. That I have someone waiting for me to come back. My treasure.”
His words from back then still made you feel warm, and after that, you always felt proud seeing him carry that sword.
Your gaze is torn away from the weapon to San himself. He was pacing around the makeshift arena planned for these occasions, warming up his limbs. His eyes seemed to wander through the place, not focusing on anyone, until they fell on you. Despite the seriousness that had ruled his behavior up until that point, he gifted you one of his characteristic smiles, which turned his eyes into two small crescents. Even with the loud music coming from the drums, you heard some girls squeal from his gesture, and you laughed at that.
San always knew how to lighten up the mood of every situation.
He kept walking until his back was turned from you, which you took as a chance to admire his sculptured figure. While he had always made clear to whom his heart belonged, that didn’t keep people from falling in love with his god-like looks. His chiseled torso was littered with tattoos, going around his arms, neck, and ribs, in addition to the big wolf head on his chest he had gotten when he was nineteen (when he had absolutely begged you to come with him for moral support).
His body was also covered in scars, mostly from battle wounds and hunting accidents. Some looked old and faded, while others appeared more recent. You knew each of them fully, seeing that you were the only one San let tend to him during those times. When he lowered his arms, you got a glimpse of his most famous one, which he bore on his left forearm. The one that earned him the title of Wolf Warrior, back when he was just twelve.
You stood waiting, just a few meters from the edge of the forest the boys had gone into a few days prior. Many of them had already returned and were celebrating all around you. But, still, there was no sign of San’s return.
You had accompanied San’s parents to wait for San to return from his ritual first hunt. For your people, this marked the beginning of manhood; a rite of passage from boys to men. It was the first time each of the boys would go hunting on their own, and they wouldn’t be allowed to come back without a prize. This ceremony was reserved for only the closest people in the boy’s life, but San’s parents had asked you to come since you were his best friend (and practically their niece, being their best friends’ daughter).
“It’s getting late, again,” San’s father said, and he was right. The sky was turning red and purple with the last lights of the day. Another day without San. “It’s only been three days, so it might still be early for him to return.”
“But most of the boys have come back,” his mother noted. She bit her lip, looking at the forest. Then, she looked at the grass and let out a sigh. “I guess you are right, we can wait another day.”
They moved to leave but stopped when they saw you hadn’t gone with them. “Y/N, let’s go home.”
You wanted to wait just a bit more. Just to be sure San wouldn’t come back that day. “I want to wait a few more minutes. If you want, you can go ahead and I’ll go back when I’m done. There are plenty of other parents here, so don’t worry about me!”
They didn’t look convinced, but they still let you. “Fine, but come back running to us if something happens.”
You waved them goodbye, but before long had passed, you saw some bushes rustle. You squinted to make sure your vision didn’t betray you, and a large figure emerged from the last line of trees. A scream rose to your throat when you saw the thick fur, but it soon died down when you saw the person carrying the furry mass.
“It’s San! It's San!” you shouted back at the distant figures of San’s parents. Thankfully, they had heard you, and they were sprinting back to your position. You ran behind them but stayed back when you saw them embrace their son.
“My son, my son is alright!” his mother repeated while holding him in her arms. Her husband embraced both of them without saying anything, but his face showed the relief he felt.
He is supposed to have returned a man, you thought while looking at the sweet scene, but they will still treat him like their baby.
“San is back!” you heard another boy say, “San came back from the hunt! But…what did he bring back though?”
That seemed to return San and his parents to reality. The ceremony wasn’t finished, as he still hadn’t presented his prize. They untangled themselves from their son and stepped back, allowing him to regain composure. It was then that you could finally see San clearly for the first time. He was soiled in mud, part of his clothes were tattered, and he had several scratches on his face, neck, and arms, but he didn’t seem bothered by them. He looked exhausted, on the verge of collapse even.
“San, my son,” his dad called out to him, “what have you brought from the hunt?”
San looked back at the big leather bag he had dropped with his parents' hug attacked. From the opening, a lot of fur spilled out without a clear form. “My prey was difficult to catch, that’s why I’m late. I’m sorry.”
“It’s okay, Sanie,” his mother reassured him but, to you, she looked nervous. “It doesn't matter what it is, just that you are here. Have you decided who you will offer it to?”
You smiled at your friend. Even if you had stood back all this time to let the Choi family have their moment, you were overjoyed at seeing your best friend take part in one of the most important challenges in his life, and you would have given anything to run to his arms. Nevertheless, you stood back and contented yourself with giving him your usual reassuring smile (also, you couldn’t deny that you were madly curious to see to whom he would give his hunt, although knowing him, it was probably his parents).
Somehow, when you caught San’s eye, he didn’t relax. On the contrary, he stepped back from his parents' embrace and clutched his bag, never releasing tension. “Yes. Yes, I have.”
Mr. and Mrs. Choi held hands, seeing their now-grown son make an important decision. You also squealed in delight, cheering on your friend as he threw the bag over his shoulder with effort. He walked towards his parents and…ignored them?
Your confusion grew as he walked past his parents in your direction. You looked behind yourself, just to see no one. San kept approaching you until he stood merely two feet away. At that distance, you had a better view of all his injuries, especially the gnarly cut on his left forearm.
“Oh my god, Sanie!” you let out, closing the distance to grab his injured arm. “You need to get that treated immediately. It’s going to scar!”
Tension seemed to lift from his shoulders as San heard your typical nagging. He grabbed your wrist back and unlatched your fingers from his arm. “That’s not important right now!”
“What do you mean-!”
“It’s not,” he cut you off. Stepping back a little, he put the bag back on the ground, letting it fall with a loud thud. “This is what’s important right now”.
He opened it completely, a gray furry mass spilling out partially. San kept grabbing and pulling, freeing the animal from the cramped space. Once it was completely out, you let out a scream.
An enormous wolf was looking back at you.
“San, what the hell!” you stumbled back from the shock. “You brought a whole ass wolf?! Are you allowed to give that thing to someone?”
Sanie beamed his boyish smile. He grabbed the animal by the scruff, not raising from his kneeling position, and offered it to you. “I’m not giving it to ‘someone’. I, Choi San, from the Choi family, present my most sacred achievement to you, whom I most treasure and thank for in life”.
Your memory was shattered by the piercing shriek that resonated through the arena, making you clutch your necklace (made from the wolf’s teeth) in fear. It sounded like straight out of your nightmares.
The rumble of heavy steps only confirmed your worst fears.
San was looking directly at the forest line, where the noises were coming from. He stood his ground as a couple of trees fell and many shook with violence. The shouts of other men could be heard as they came closer and closer. Finally, before the whole tribe appeared a creature that left you nauseous.
Four enormous green and scaly legs carried an even bigger body; as tall as the tallest building in your village. The scales shone under the harsh sunlight and were thick enough to compare to an iron armor. Its talons tore through the hard soil like it was mere sand. Its lack of wings didn’t make it less intimidating; on the contrary, it warned its prey of its prowess on land. But it wasn’t the size, the fangs, the talons of the scales that paralyzed your body.
It was the eyes.
For the briefest moment, your gaze connected with the dragon’s. Its eyes glowed red with a primal fury you had only seen on a cornered animal, waiting to fight back if only to cause damage to its hunter before its ultimate demise. That look raised every hair on your body.
The dragon continued to shriek and thrash against the chains that the men, whom you recognized as San’s best friends, held tightly. They were being overpowered by the creature’s brute force, but they still held on for their friend’s chance at having the best prize the village would ever see.
All for you.
“Ladies and gentlemen,” San had turned to the crowd, “let the best hunt our people have ever witnessed in our long history begin!”
The sound of chains hitting the ground was almost drowned by the roar of your people. Once the beast was free, it lounged at full speed at San, forgetting about his other captors, hissing and letting its venom drip on the floor. An involuntary scream was ripped from your throat as you stood from your kneeling position.
“San, run!” you screamed moving forward, but a heavy hand on your shoulder stopped you from going further. It was your father’s.
“No, you stay here,” he demanded.
“Father, you have to stop this,” you pleaded at him. “This is madness! San can’t fight on his own against that!”
But your father was unmoving. “No, this is the challenge he chose, and he must accept his fate.”
“You don’t believe that,” your tone was dark, “at least not with San. Do you want your best friends’ child to die a stupid death? Do you want my best friend to die a stupid death?! Because I wi-!”
While he had remained emotionless during all the ceremony, now he looked furious. “(Y/N), compose yourself for gods’ sake!”
“But-”
“Your feelings do not matter right now, only San’s. He is down there, risking his life only for you to look at him. He chose this, no one else, and what he needs the most right now is your support. Do you understand?”
You understood, and those were the words you needed to sober up. Regardless of your feelings, whether you thought he was being reckless or not, San was fighting for the acceptance of your love in the eyes of your village. He didn’t need you to doubt him, he needed you to be by his side. Not to mention that he would be upset that you doubted his strength.
Until that moment, San had managed to evade all of the dragon’s attacks, opting for taking a defensive stance. The strength and size difference between them was abysmal, so the fate of either would be reduced to who could endure the chase for the longest. A battle of attrition.
The dragon charged at full speed once more, and San stood his ground, sword in front of him. The beast had almost reached him, when San dodged at the last second, managing to slash the tendon of one of its talons, but his arm brushed against one of its scales. Blood began to gush out of the wound, but he paid no mind to it. The battle was far from over, and he was determined to be the last one standing. He owed it to himself, and you.
For what seemed hours (and probably were), you saw San run around the arena, dodging attacks and inflicting more on his opponent. He was visibly injured, having been hit numerous times by the sharp weapons of the dragon, and caked on blood and mud. Nevertheless, the dragon itself wasn’t in a much better state; San had managed to slash open the tendons of three out of the four legs, and it had trouble moving at a fast speed. The sturdy sword of San had also pierced the thick armor of the beast, leaving big wounds on its sides and belly.
Dragons were magnificent creatures. They were perfectly designed to withstand almost all types of damage, being covered in those solid scales that rivaled metal. Some had enormous wings that they used to soar the skies of their vast territories, some breathed fire and ice. Many explorers even claimed that some races could even understand human language. From those many tales, it was expected to believe these beasts were invincible. However, what not many knew was that dragons did have a weakness, a physical one even. Under the sturdy chunks of armor on the chest, just at the area where the heart would’ve been located, the scales were more fragile, soft enough to let a blade penetrate the skin and kill the creature. Not many knew of this weak spot due to the difficulty of even getting close to a dragon, let alone surviving the encounter. Not many knew of it, except for San.
He could see that the dragon was getting tired from constantly playing the offensive. The blood loss was weighing it down, making its attacks slower and weaker, and San wasn’t easy prey to catch. He had been getting closer and closer to the one spot that would lead him to victory. The plan was to make the dragon bleed as much as possible, before ending it all in one move. He wasn’t much fan of making his prey suffer, but neither he was of getting his head bit off (leaving you practically widowed).
San kneeled for a moment, taking a breather as the dragon hissed at a new wound he made near its tail. His own injuries were also slowing him down, although the adrenaline kept him moving. He knew he couldn’t keep up much longer, and it was time to put an end to the battle while he still had the strength to continue.
It was time for the last act.
You saw San muster up the strength to stand up. You had lost count of how many times he was close to finally hunting down the dragon, so now you prayed that he just kept inflicting cuts on the beast until it finally died from blood loss. However, something was different in San. He seemed more confident this time, and you knew what it meant. San was now playing the offensive.
In half a second, San had banished from where he had been standing. Your eyes found him again a few meters closer to the dragon, sprinting at full speed directly towards him. The animal had taken notice of your friend, and stood firmly on its four legs, waiting to rip his head off his body. When San was directly in front of it, the dragon raised on its hind legs, as if to gather full force to strike down on the man and end the fight. You let out a gasp.
It was a fatal mistake.
Instead of stopping as the dragon had expected, San slid underneath it, raising his sword as the creature threw itself down full force. You blinked. One moment, the dragon had been roaring in victory and, in the next one, it was shuddering as it had impaled itself directly into San’s blade. The last remnants of life escaped in convulsions from the body of the beast, and it collapsed unceremoniously into the ground, a mere carcass of the magnificent animal it had been before. The crowd went quiet for the death of a splendid being.
You couldn’t care less for the animal. You couldn’t see San, so you were beginning to be worried that he had been crushed under the weight of the dragon. Your eyes frantically searched for him, until a figure emerged from beside the dead body. San was drenched in blood and struggled to breathe. He had never let go of the sword.
It was the true sight of a legendary hero.
San raised his hand and tried to wipe away some of the blood off his face, which made you chuckle as it was also covered in blood. Realizing the futility of that, he desisted and, instead, looked down on his weapon. He smiled at the inscription and grabbed it with his two hands. In one swift movement, he stabbed the chest of the dragon once more. You frowned in confusion as he kept stabbing and cutting through the body of the beast, as it was already dead, leaving a carnage behind. Behind you, a couple of old men were discussing the useful properties of all the organs and parts of the dragon and how they would have used them, but you couldn’t care less about that. At last, San seemed to find what he was looking for and dropped the sword. He plunged his hands into the hole he had made (which made you gag a little if you were being honest) and pulled out something. Everyone around you let out a collective gasp.
San was holding a dragon’s heart. A heart made out of pure gold.
Your jaw went slack. The heart was huge, as it belonged to a huge creature, and probably weighed a considerable amount. Nevertheless, San held it with the remaining strength he had. You couldn’t start to fathom the value of such rarity, much less the fact that it was now yours. The crowd cheered as he raised the piece over his head; a sign that declared him the victor.
Having basked in glory long enough, San secured a grip on the golden heart and began the ascent towards where you still kneeled beside your father and mother. It wasn’t that long of a distance, but carrying a heavy object after hours of battle sure was harsh on his body. Despite the ache, he continued to advance.
Your mother reached out for you, smiling as she grabbed your hand affectionately. "He did it! He did it! Finally, you can marry San!"
Finally.
You glanced down at San once more. The grown man that just killed a dragon looked nothing like the kid from ten years ago.
"Marry me". San blurted out of nowhere. The sudden request startled you, making you accidentally press on his wound. "Ouch! Be careful, you idiot!"
You felt offended. "Me? An idiot? You are the dumbass that proposes to someone while they are cleaning your wound. I should let your arm rot for being an idiot and reckless on your first hunt!"
He glared at you. "You wouldn't dare…"
"Try me."
He didn't reply, and you fell into a comfortable silence. San had dragged you away from the banquet his family had prepared on account of his newly acquired "manhood", complaining how his arm hurt from not being properly treated and he needed you to do it for him. Now you sat on a small hut next to his house, illuminated by a small candle, jars of ointments and gauzes lying on the floor beside your forms.
San watched as you applied another cream to his arm. "You didn't answer".
You didn't look at him, focused on treating him. "You didn't ask anything". Before he could hit you with a reply, you added "Besides, we can't get married".
That seemed to upset him. "Why not? We know each other perfectly, and our parents as best friends. I'm sure they would accept it".
You laughed at his naïveness. "It's not about approval. Marriage is for people that love each other".
Now, San just seemed confused. "But we love each other. We say it all the time".
"We love each other," you conceded, "but we aren't in love with each other". San's expression remained confused, so you tried to explain it in another way. "You and I love each other as brother and sister, and we act as such. People that get married treat the other as…well…lovers. They spend time together, they share stuff, they hold hands, they kiss. They swear to be with each other until death. They take care of each other. Forever!"
Your explanation didn't convince San. "But, don't we already do that? Minus the kissing, of course. Wouldn't that mean we are in love?"
The mere thought of being in love with San sent your prepubescent brain into short-circuit. It repulsed you in some way, as you had only looked at him as a brother, but you couldn't deny the butterflies in your stomach.
"No, it doesn't," you exclaimed. "Also, people that get married first become girlfriend and boyfriend! You can't be my boyfriend!"
San also looked repulsed at the sound of that word. "Ew, no! I don't want a girlfriend".
"See, that's why we can't get married".
"I don't want a girlfriend," his eyes burned holes in your head, "but I still think it would be nice if we got married. We already promised to be in each other's life forever and I care for you, so I don't think it'd make much difference".
You briefly looked back at him and rolled your eyes, grabbing a roll of gauze. "Why are you even thinking about that, Sanie? Marriage is an adult thing. We are twelve-year-old kids!"
"Speak for yourself! This proves I'm a grown man", he pointed at the wound, grinning. You shot him an amused look, opting for saying nothing and continuing with your job. It didn't take much time for San to break the silence yet again. "I guess all this new 'adulthood' stuff got me thinking about this new chapter of my life and-"
"Mhm"
"-all the things I can do now. Somehow that ended up in my thinking about marriage and how would it feel to get married to someone you like, you know?"
"Yes, yes".
"Then I thought of who I would marry, and I thought of you. Since all that best friend shit is basically the same shit you described, but if you say it's different, I guess it is. Either way, we should wait a little more before that, to think matters better and decide if-"
Oh, no. San had started rambling. "Sanie! What on gods' sake are you trying to say?!"
"What age do you think is the most appropriate to get married?" He looked dead serious now.
You finished dressing the wound, and threw your tools on the ground, exasperated by San's strange behavior. "I don't know! I already said that marriage is for adults!"
"Well, then at what age did your parents get engaged?"
You loved the story of how your parents go together, so it was an easy question. “Oh, my father proposed to my mother when he was twenty-two and she wa-”
San beamed as he interrupted you once more. “Perfect! Then my proposal will be suspended until then. I will ask you again when I turn twenty-two. That way I’ll give you time to fall in love with me, or whatever it is that you need.”
All the previous conversations had proven fruitless again and again, so it was better to leave things as they were, hoping that soon San would move to other subjects.
“Fine, whatever. We’ll probably have forgotten it by then”.
Except, he did not. And neither did you. On the contrary. With time, you had grown fond of your best friend, leaving behind the innocent affections of childhood to make place for the blossoming feelings of romantic love. Where you were hesitant to express these feelings, he openly did to anyone and anything willing to listen. He wanted you and only you. It wasn’t only the grand moments of expressed admiration that made you fall for him, but the quiet moments of thoughtfulness that instilled your devotion for him.
When he carried your things without a word, even if he knew you were perfectly capable of doing it on your own. When he held your hand as you walked through more deserted parts of the village. When you would silently work on the injuries he would bring home, never asking how he got them. When you would hold each other, letting the other shed their tears, just basking in each other’s comfort.
All those moments paved the way for the unspoken transformation of your relationship. You were neither friends nor lovers. No words could describe the depth of your understanding of each other. So, for you and the rest of the world, you were simply “Y/N and San”.
And you wouldn’t have had it any other way.
As usual in any other important celebration, San had dragged you away from everybody. This time, it was his birthday and, although he loved being with his friends and family, he wanted to spend time alone with you. As you both grew, so did your responsibilities, yours as the daughter of the village chief and San’s as the strongest member, so there were periods where your time together was limited.
As soon as you were decently away from the rest of the party, San had taken you in his arms in a warm embrace. You inhaled his scent. He smelled like home. You didn’t question what was up with the sudden display of affection, you knew he would let you know in time. He was never one to keep quiet for much time.
“Marry me”.
He hadn’t forgotten. San was a man of his word.
“Today I turn twenty-two,” he told you, as if you weren’t currently celebrating that fact, “it’s the day I’m finally asking you to be mine”.
Your heart threatened to escape your ribcage from pure glee. “I’ve always been yours, Sanie. Since the day you first asked.”
You felt his smile as he pressed a kiss to the crown of your head. “Thank you, thank you. You know that I belong to you too. I’ll take care of you, so good. Every day, all day. And you won’t be able to get rid of me”.
You chuckled. “I don’t know about that. You can barely take care of yourself”.
“But it’s different since I don't care about myself, only about my treasure”.
For longer, you remained like you were. Many breaths passed before any of you said anything.
“I’m leaving the day after tomorrow,” he announced, shattering the moment, “it won’t be for too long and the guys are coming with me”.
“Leaving? To where?” you asked, confused.
“As much as I’d love to stay with my beautiful fiancée,” you loved how the title sounded coming from him, “I have to bring her a pretty hunting trophy, so she can boast to the whole town about having the strongest boyfriend to ever live”.
You stayed silent. Even if you wanted San to forgo tradition and stay with you, you knew he wasn’t in an easy position. As the chief’s daughter, you didn’t require him to only fulfill the role of the husband. By marrying you, he would automatically become the next in line for the position of chief, as you had no male relatives that could assume it. Thus, he needed to prove himself worthy of you and the whole village.
The very next day, he announced to your community his intentions of marrying you and becoming head of the village. The day after that, he was gone.
Sixty-two days had passed since you last felt his warmth, so when he stood before you, still covered in blood and grime, holding his heart (well, not his in a strict manner), you itched to extend your hand to his cheek and wipe the exhaustion away.
Once more, the ceremonial drums stopped after hours of incessant banging. It was time for your father to speak.
“Choi San,” he called out to your lover, “Ten years ago, when you were barely a man, I bestowed you the title of ‘Wolf Warrior’, which has been reserved for the strongest of our kind, in hopes that you would use it to protect and serve our people. Despite that great honor, you have used that same title and strength to recklessly endanger our home by bringing a dragon for mere spectacle. Had things gone askew, it wouldn’t have been just your life that we would have lost, but many others”.
After the little speech he gave you about trusting San, you were surprised by the harsh scolding your father was giving San in front of other people. Nevertheless, you understood his position as responsible for the village.
“However, on this day you have achieved a feat none of our ancestors could compare to. The tale of the man who single-handedly slew an adult dragon with just a sword will be told by many generations to come, under the title of ‘Choi San, the Dragon Warrior’; title I am to bestow you and will only belong to you. But I’m afraid names and merits would be meaningless if the intent behind them isn’t honored”.
Your father paused briefly before resuming. “Time and time again, you have proven your worth as a man beyond the power of his sword. Your contributions to the safekeeping of our people speak for themselves, and any reward would be in order as compensation for your service. However, I know you seek not money or fame, but something deeper than that.
“Choi San. I’ve seen you and Y/N grow into the splendid adults you are today. I’ve seen your care for each other and your understanding of each other. After today, I do no doubt that there is no better man for my daughter, and no better one to succeed me when I am no longer able. Therefore, I declare successful your attempt and bless the union between the two of you”.
Your heart soared higher than the sky above you. You could have broken your neck with how fast you whipped your head to look back at San, tears threatening to spill from your eyes.
San. San. Sanie.
He was on one knee on the ground before you. The golden heart sat on the floor in front of him, displayed as an offering to you. He held his hands open, waiting for you to take them. You did so, standing up and grabbing his fingers, not caring one bit that they were still covered in grime. San looked at you intensely, wanting you to look at him and only him. Now and for the rest of your lives.
“My treasure,” he spoke so softly as if you were going to shatter if he spoke any louder, “from my very first breath, everything I’ve done has been for you and only you. My first thoughts in the morning and my last ones before bed are of you, and even in my sleep I see you next to me. Every beat of my heart is for you, until the last of them. But, even then, there are no words to describe how deeply I love you”.
Your lips quivered, but you broke into a teary smile nonetheless. “Oh, Sanie. If you keep going, I’m afraid I will cry for real”.
“Don’t worry,” he gripped your hands tighter, “I will be here to wipe away all of them”. San planted a kiss on your knuckles before continuing. “Ever since I was a child, I knew it was you who I wanted to be with for the rest of my life, even if you disliked the idea of that. I knew it had to be me who had to be there in your moments of joy, as well as your moments of sadness. It had to be me who cared for you when you weren’t able to care for yourself and be by your side when you didn’t want anyone else. It doesn’t have to be me, but I want it to be me”.
You swore you could hear some girls sigh behind you, and you couldn’t relate more to that.
“Today I, Choi San of the Choi family, offer you the best of me. I present to you this prize as an offering of my heart, my body, and my soul, which from now on are yours to dispose of. If you wish to accept it, and therefore accept me, I’ll belong to you for the rest of eternity. If you let me be by your side, I’ll do my best to care for you, and not even water will touch your hands. These words will be true, whether you accept my offerings or not since it’s only to you I wish to lay my life for”.
With a last kiss to your hands, he brought them up and rested his forehead on them. The tips of his ears appeared slightly red and his own hands trembled. You knew your Sanie enough to recognize he was equally nervous and embarrassed (which he had nothing to feel shame for, as he had said cheesier things under the influence of liquor).
You rubbed your thumbs on the back of his hand, hoping to soothe his nerves. “Rise, my young warrior. A man like you should be kneeling for nobody”.
He didn’t stand up. “But you aren’t ‘nobody’, my love. You are my strength and my will”.
This man will be the death of me, you laughed to yourself.
“And you are the most stubborn man I’ve ever encountered,” you poked at him. You tugged firmly at your intertwined hands, signaling that you needed him to get back on his feet, “and I’m afraid that you won’t be able to hear my words properly from down there”.
That made him look up to you once more, and finally stand up from the ground. This time, you didn’t hold yourself back from letting go of his fingers to remove a piece of hair from San’s eyes. Your own ones lingered a while longer, just to find themselves cupping his cheek. San snuggled up to your palm instinctively, reminding you of a cat.
“My love,” San closed his eyes and sighed at the name, “you have fought so bravely for the both of us. Not just today, but for a very long time. It is me who should be thanking you for brightening my life with just your presence, and for never giving up on me. We’ve had our highs and lows, but there’s no time of my life that I can remember without you being present. You too have had full ownership of my heart since the very beginning, and it is not my desire for you to relinquish your rights to it”.
“I too want to be the one who cares for you when you aren’t able to fend for yourself. I too want to be who you come to when you have wounds to heal. I want to be who you wake up to every morning, and who you sleep next to every night. I want to be the source of your strength and your place of rest; to protect your heart from harm and your mind from turmoil.”
“My Sanie, for as long as you let me, I will be yours, and even further than that if you decide you love me no more. Everything I have, I will share with you. Where you go, I will go. Whom you love I will love, and whom you despise I will despise. There’s nothing that will give me greater joy than to be yours. So I, Y/N, accept this prize as a symbol of my love and the union that will bind us from now on”.
You had barely finished when you found yourself spinning in the air, San’s hands grabbing you firmly by your waist. You finally let out tears of joy and looked down to see that he was crying too. San put you back on the ground, but never let you go. On the contrary, he pulled you towards him in the biggest hug. One of his hands held you by the waist, while the other rested on the back of your head. Your forehead hid on the crook of his neck, and your hands moved restlessly across his broad back. The drums now played a happy beat and people danced for the new couple. From the corner of your eyes, you could see your parents and San’s embracing each other, finally together as a family.
“My love, my love, my love,” San whispered in your ear, unable to stop repeating those words.
“My Sanie,” you whispered back, “I’m sorry I made you wait for so long”.
“Nothing of that matters now,” he reassured you, “I could have waited longer if it meant I’d have you at the end.”
“You always know what to say,” you joked. “Always the hopelessly romantic idiot”
“You are right. But now I’m your idiot”.
“No, you are my husband”.
San stopped all movement before slightly pushing you away from him. He held your gaze for a couple of seconds before grabbing your face with a smirk adorning his lips. “Hell yeah, I am”.
He leaned down and captured your lips in a heart-stopping kiss. Your brain melted to mush and you could only think about him, surrounding every part of you.
San. San. Sanie.
The world could have ended at that very moment, and neither of you would have cared. Not when you had each other in every sense of the word, cause that is all that mattered. You and him.
Y/N and San.
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