#got told today that using my current mental state to tell someone why i didn't want to hang out was “traumadumping” and “manipulative”

[ailurosacolyte]

yknow it's really funny to me that our society picked up mental health awareness as a source of virtue signaling, but only extended it to the "trendy" and "quirky" mental illnesses/symptoms. neurotypical people talk about their special interests and stims, but get uncomfortable around autistic folks who are non-verbal. they say that they have horrible anxiety because they don't like phone calls, but don't know how to be around anyone in the midst of a nervous breakdown. they talk about "not having enough spoons" after getting home from a day of work at their office job, but look down upon folks with chronic fatigue or depression when they don't have the energy to participate in group activities. they say that they're ocd because they like keeping their desk organized, but get disturbed when someone with ocd has a breakdown due to their symptoms. ptsd is only okay when you give it to your anime husbando in your hurt/comfort fanfic, because people with ptsd in real life are uncomfortable to be around due to their trauma. the list goes on

[surgicalgrandparents-aita]

I sent this in at the beginning of the month (I think) so I figured I'd provide additional context and provide some updates.

I haven't left yet (next point elaborates on why), but I have a friend from out of state who offered to be my roommate (in addition to this, my brother's planning to get a place when he finishes his military training and also told me I could move in with him once he has a place, but I want to leave sooner so it's not something I'm considering currently).

There are probably multiple people wondering why I haven't left yet, or why I didn't leave the second I turned 18. I'm also disabled. I have epilepsy that's triggered by heat, physical exhaustion, and flashing lights (and the rate at which lights have to flash to trigger a seizure for me are INCREDIBY inconsistent; I've been able to ace a strobe test but also had strobe tests cause seizures), which makes getting a job and driving potentially dangerous and leaving me with limited independence (I've also been having issues getting on a proper sleep schedule, which would make it difficult to even hold a job). I've also been told by multiple neurologists that when I do move out I shouldn't live on my own to due to the safety risk of me living alone while having epilepsy with the triggers I have. Basically, because I haven't had anyone else to live with, I haven't been able to move out, and wouldn't be able to anyway because I don't have the funds (something I'm trying to fix. I applied for social security benefits earlier today for example; it'll take a while for the application process to go through though).

My grandpa has received his knee surgery. My grandma hasn't received her surgeries, as I believe she's waiting until spring/summer.

I have a dog, specifically a pitbull, which makes it hard to find a place to live (because of breed restrictions). However, I have witnessed firsthand my grandparents slap her if she swipes food, and they've told me to put her (with her short as hell fur) outside in sub-freezing temperatures as punishment (personally, I don't think you should ever put a dog outside as punishment or punish a dog in general, but that's just me). If I'm gonna leave, I'm bringing my dog with me, because I'm not leaving her with people who are going to punish her like that.

I called my grandpa lazy because he is legitimately lazy. His disability basically boils down to a painful limp, but he doesn't let it stop him from doing things he wants to do. If he doesn't want to do something he has someone else do it. He has people grab things for him that he can grab just fine on his own. He took his entire deck apart and put it back together almost completely on his own before he got his surgery.

My grandpa does not care about my sensory issues (to clarify: I have an autism diagnosis, and my family knows this because I talk about it regularly). I ask him to stop doing something because it's bothering me and he doesn't. He actually used to actively mock me over this but doesn't anymore thankfully. He'll have the TV up way too loud and complain if I ask him to turn it down because it's too loud. I wear pajamas most of the time because it's what's most comfortable to me, and I've fought both my grandparents over this.

When my grandpa got back from his surgery (my grandma went with him and my dad took him), it was an overnight trip because the hospital doing the surgery was 3 hours away and my grandpa had to be checked in by 5:30am. I actually felt my mental health get worse when they got back, and I think that alone says a lot about how much I need to leave.

When it comes to them asking me to do things, it's not so much what they're asking, it's the quantity of requests and how they're phrased. I feel like I'm constantly being asked to things, and being interrupted when I'm in the middle of doing something makes me irritable. Additionally, I've had them ask me to do things while I'm playing a game I can't pause, then when I tell them I couldn't pause what I was doing they act like I was lying to get out of what they wanted me to do. I'm actually better at doing things I need to do when I'm not told to. I genuinely think I'd do better if they told me they needed something done rather than telling me to do something (ie, "The curtains need to be closed" vs "Come close the curtains"). I've brought this up to my grandma but she doesn't really seem to care. Additionally, they don't ask, they demand.

My dad has his own apartment, and a full time job. If he's not working he's sleeping or getting ready for work, which led to me developing behavioral issues as a kid. Those behavioral issues, combined with undiagnosed autism, resulted in me being sent to a group home for a year and seven months, which is something I have nightmares over due to the abandonment issues it gave me.

In addition to all this, my grandparents have done several things that come off as manipulative/are straight up manipulative in hindsight (this isn't everything, just the things I can think of off the top of my head).

There was one time a few months ago when I got into a fight with my grandpa and the next day he took me to get lunch. He acted really nice the entire time and like nothing had happened, which I remember confused the shit out of me.

My grandpa has threatened to get rid of my dog several times because he thought I wasn't taking care of her. My grandma was perfectly fine with this????? My grandpa actually told me he got rid of her when he took her to her first professional grooming appointment.

I told my grandparents to stop giving my dog human food so I could start training her to not steal food and they started acting like it was my fault they were giving her human food in the first place.

That's all I can think of to add for now. I hope this was thorough enough to answer any additional questions.

AITA for moving out right before my disabled grandparents get surgeries? (TWs for transphobia, child abuse, child neglect, religious trauma, the whole works)

Alright so I (19 NB, turning 20 in January) am trying to find a place to move out of state because my grandparents (who I currently live with) and dad don’t treat me (or my 18 year old brother) the best. I don’t feel like I have a lot of freedom to do what I want, because my grandparents (76 M and 74 F) are constantly asking me to do things they can do just fine on their own and they threaten me if I don’t comply. I was also raised to never question authority which includes them, so they act like me questioning their authority or opinions is me getting into fights with them. My dad (46 M) just enables them, telling me to behave and listen to them like I’m still a kid.

In addition to all this, they’re all transphobic. As mentioned before, I’m non-binary. My dad and grandma aren’t as bad and seem to be complying with my grandpa’s views, but my grandpa is HORRIFIC. I tried to explain my identity to him once and he straight up told me he didn’t care and didn’t want an explanation.

Outside of this, my grandparents are also Mormon, which has led me to end up with some religious trauma. They blame every one of their views on their religion, and are constantly telling me I’m never gonna be happy if I don’t start going to church again (something I haven’t done since I was 13 or 14).

My dad also told me he hopes I like my “newer brother” and how he’s changed because my brother is currently training to be a medic in the US military, and just finished his basic training. Aside from this being extremely off putting to me, this isn’t the first time my dad has sorta acted like I’m his golden child.

It’s worth noting that with how I’ve been treated my entire life, I’ve picked up people pleasing tendencies and can’t even say no. If I don’t want to do something I procrastinate until someone else does it then lie and claim I was going to do it.

Now all of this might have you like “NO YOU ARE OBVIOUSLY NOT THE ASSHOLE” but here’s where I’m questioning that.

Both of my grandparents are disabled. My grandma had a stroke back in 2010 that still affects her to this day and as a result of it her balance is messed up so she has a hard time doing things on her own. My grandpa is having a knee surgery to help alleviate his disability (although a lot of his behavior is absolutely 100% just laziness). It’s making me feel bad for even considering leaving, but I’m so sick of being treated how I am. I feel like I can’t learn to say no until I’m cut off from my family. I don’t even remember most of my childhood and have a dissociative disorder, and I’m pretty sure those are linked (not remembering most of my childhood and having a dissociative disorder).

But I just. I genuinely can’t shake the feeling that I’m an asshole for moving out right before my grandparents get surgeries. So. AITA?

What are these acronyms?

[kuronanox]

Trapped - Aizen Sosuke

Everywhere I go he is always watching, everything I do he knows. Aizen is the monster nobody knows about even till this day no one believes what happen a 110 years ago.

"What do you want?" (Your Name) bitterly says to the 5th captain as he kindly invited himself next to her.

"What do you mean? I'm nicely taking a stroll next to you."

(Your Name) pushes him away from her as Hinamori came running from behind them. "(Your Name) don't you think you are being rude to Aizen Taicho?"

"We are simply messing around." He warmly smiles to his lieutenant and pats her head as she smiles back. (Your Name) stares in disgust at the scene in front of her. Although she never told Hinamori he was a bad man she gave hints to the younger girl. (Your Name) knew he was up to something but she didn't know what yet.

"Tch." (Your Name) said and walked away, although Aizen kept the smile on his face as he watched her walk away.

"Why do you hate Aizen Taicho?" Renji asks her as most of the liutenants decided to go drinking for the night. "I have my reasons." she simply stated as Matsumoto shook her head and wrapped an arm around (Your Name). "Don't tell me that you confessed your feelings and he denied them."

(Your Name) furiously pushed her away before chugging the sake bottle infront of her.

"Aizen! He isn't kind like how you all think he is! Neither is Gin and Tousen." she yells as it got dead silence as the liutenants started hearing other captains names in her mouth. "He tried to kill previous captains and liutenants for his own advantages! I'm serious all my friends... I witness them. They were covered in white and he was just smiling like a sadistic!"

There was no words coming from anyone's mouth and they all started laughing as she gives a look of disbelief "No one believes me."

"Looks like someone had to much drinks tonight!" Renji blurts out as Shuhei and Kira laugh along side with Rangiku, Ikkaku and Yumichika.

"Good thing Hinamori isn't here, or else she would have told Aizen."

(Your Name) just ignored their laughter as she plays along with them and decided it was time to get back to her barrack. "Goodbye." she tells everyone and exit the small pub.

Almost reaching the 13th squad barracks where she is currently the 3rd seat she felt a menacing atmosphere around her almost as a snake was watching her. "I know you are following me."

Gin comes out from the shadows and grin towards her as he raises his hands. "Looks like I got caught."

"Why are you following me?" she says now as he simply gets closer to her as she backs up towards the wall where he cornered her. "Nothing much, Ya know ya shouldn't be spreadin false rumors."

Before she could say anything Ukitake opens the door and his eyes widen. "Oh my! So scandalous." He cheerfully laughs and scratches his head lightly to break any tension. (Your Name) pushes Gin off and runs behind her captain.

"See ya (Your Name)!" Gin waves off as she peaks from behind Ukitake and snorts.

"Weirdo."

"(Your Name) I didn't know you and Ichimaru Taicho were a item."

"We aren't, It's just-" she stopped mid sentence and sighed before opening the door for their barrack. "It's nothing Taicho. No one ever believes me anyways."

Ukitake watches her leave and then looks at Gin. "People have been suspicion about him recently especially Hitsugaya Taicho." He sighs and makes his way towards Kyorakus place for some night drinking. "Good work!" He cheerfully said to a shinigami that was sweeping the floor as he passed by.

Little did he know Aizen was watching everything.

"I am the absolute, everything will be to my command."

Aizen says wrapping his arms around the back of her, as if his long arms were going to suffocate her neck. She tried to scream but it was only silence that came out. The pain of her throat burning was present.

She wanted to move but her body was stuck as he moved himself to face her. He didn't look like the Aizen everyone knew. His glasses were gone and his hair was slick back. This was the real Aizen. He smiled elegantly as he watched her struggled to let her voice be heard.

"As it should be (Your Name), a voice that can't be heard. No one ever believed you and very soon they will regret not listening to you... very soon."

She woke up in the middle of the night with cold sweat, her heart rate was rocketing. She hugged her knees and cried. She missed them, Shinji, Yoruichi, Kensei, Urahara all of them. She was determine to find them one day even if it met betraying the soul society.

She shuttered in fear. "That dream felt so real."

The following months passed and the soul society was hectic. (Your Name) learned that someone murdered Aizen. "It can't be real." She shutters seeing his body. She knew it wasn't real, everyone was placing blame on Gin but Gin was working next to Aizen. Kira and Hinamori were locked up for advancing towards each other and now she felt the menacing reitsu of Hitsugaya flow out.

"We have to stay calm and act together. It's not him!" (Your Name) screamed to Hinamori as the girl was fast to yield her sword and attack Hitsugaya upfront. The smaller man hit her to hard as she fell on the floor

(Your Name) couldn't tell why but she was frozen. Her body couldn't move and her voice wasn't heard again. She saw Hinamori collapse.

"Stop fighting." (Your Name) quietly says watching Gin and Hitsugaya.

"All of you are pathetic. Aizen... he's doing this to throw everyone off. The vice captain and captains shouldn't be fighting each other." She screamed at them. "Shh (Your Name) your voice can't be heard remember?"

The smooth deep voice whispered in her mind as she grabbed her head. "STOP MESSING WITH MY HEAD!" Her cold sweat coming back as she sees a blurry view of the two captain engaged in battle.

Finally getting up to attend the aid of Hinamori she saw a flash of Gin's blade moving towards the small girl. With (Your Name) reaching out for Hinamori she was about to miss saving her by a second.

A sharp blade collapsed with Gin as Matsumoto showed up to save the day.

The following nights she had nightmares, it was as if Aizen was creating them. He was torturing her. With Rukia's execution and the whole gotei against each other she couldn't keep up. She began to get stressed, and depressed. She needed to find Aizen and confront him. "I know he isn't dead, that bastard."

A rough hand had covered (Your Name) mouth in her sleep as she was dragged out of bed. Aizen in her view as she screamed only to be knocked out cold. The next time she woke up was with Gin as she sees a happy Hinamori embrace Aizen. "Hinamori don't do it, please don't do it."

She was stabbed like a pawn, she watched as Hitsugaya wrath got lost in control. Aizen defeated everyone. No one was stopping him from his goal. She looked at two bodies and central 46 laid on the floor just as he did 110 years ago. "You monster." She tells him as he held her chin. "I'm simply achieving a goal, there is nothing to be bitter about." He defends as she spits in his face. Unpleasantly his hand slapped her face as she saw the red blood coming from her mouth.

"Why didn't you just kill me all these years?" She then says as he shakes his head. "Because watching you suffer and torturing your sleep everything night was pleasing."

The prescene of Unohana and Isane joined the room as her suspicions of Aizen were right. Looking towards (Your Name) Unohana gave a sympathetic look towards her.

Aizen revealing his plans throws (Your Name) towards where the bodies were laid as him and Gin made there way to the hill. "I am in no use of watching you suffer anymore." Aizen then tells her.

Unohana ordered Isane to warn the Soul Society that Aizen was the real enemy.

"No one believed me till now." (Your Name) mustered up as the tears fall down. "It takes our world to be thrown into chaos for my voice to be heard."

"We apologize for the behalf of all Soul Society, we should have listened to your warnings years ago." Unohana says taking care of the injured Captain of squad 10 and lieutenant of squad 5.

"It's fine, what's done is done. I have to go to the hill and see everything for myself." She then says as Unohana gives her permission to leave.

At the hill Aizen was already captured, (Your Name) already knew he was going to escape though. Aizen was the mastermind of everything that had been happening. He looked into her eyes with a smirk. "I knew you would come."

She sneers in disgust, she wanted so bad to hurt him, she wanted Aizen to feel the pain she did all these years.

"To everyone in Soul Society today, I've been hiding my plans under your noses for years. It's such a shame that no one believed my dear (Your Name)." Aizen announces as Gin and Tousen stand beside him as they escape through a garganta.

"(Your Name) congratulations, you survived all these years. I'll be waiting for you in your dreams."

She shutters, he was still planning to torture her? No he couldn't but then again Aizen is the mastermind.

As everyone recovered from the days event, she was given an big apology from everyone. She didn't want that though. She wanted her friends back.

"Let's see how things turn out for you (Your Name), you never fail to amuse me." Aizen voice says in her head that very night she fell asleep.

(Your Name) lays in bed unable to move. Aizen was going to mess with her head till he was captured and dead.  "Stop messing with me." she whimpered in her sleep as she curled up as a baby.

The room was white, she mentally was messed up. The room was giving her so much anxiety, she was going to have a panic attack. "Shh, no need to be afraid. I haven't decided to hurt you yet." His voice echoes through the room as she tried to find a exit.

"Where am I?!" (Your Name) screams as he chuckles. "You are somewhere safe. Somewhere no one can hear you."

That send chills in her back, this place was not soul society. She screamed in agony and pulled her hair. "Let me out!" closing her eyes and opening them back up the white room was still in her sight.

Aizen opens the door to reveal himself, he held a calm smile on his face. "This is your new home, learn how to like and love it.

"Bastard, I'll kill you."

"Hmm sounds great, have fun trying." he playfully says and grabs her chin. "This will be your new wonderland where I'll teach you to only listen to me." Aizen seriously says then.

(Your Name) woke up with sweat on her face, her heart was racing. "This has to be a dream. Please let it be."

"I'm sorry but it's not." She hears Aizen voice as he sat beside her bed.

Her face set with horror. "How, When did I get here?"

Aizen grabs her face gently. "Welcome to your new home, I've been waiting years for this."

She was trapped, this was also his plan all along. To toy with her head and then to take her hostage once everyone believed her. "You really are a cruel man."

He smiles and leans on his hand.

"You will learn how to accept me at a matter of time. Now sleep, I have much to discuss with you later." The last haunting imagine of him was a menacing smile on his face as she fell into deep sleep.

(Author note: I’m sorry this is not my best work ;-;......)

[smileyoongle]

Deception (A Kim Namjoon Mafia AU)

Summary: A damsel in distress and a lonely mafia leader. Different but not too different. The two worlds collide on a rainy night when Kim Namjoon, a renowned Mafia leader is called for an emergency and Y/N Y/L/N is on the run from her abusive father. Feelings stir and he rescues her. But one of them is a liar. And the other's life is on the line. It's only a matter of time until all secrets are out in the open.

Will love be born? Or will death conquer?

chαptєr ηïηε: Betrayal and Longing

Character Count: 12,084

Pairing: Namjoon×Reader (Appearances by the whole of BTS)

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Wrap me in the softest love I have ever known, show me that I'm not alone.

- Christy Ann Martine

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"She's heading to Club Delirium tonight. I eavesdropped on a conversation she was secretly having so don't ask me how I know." Rex announced, entering the conference room with a shit-eating grin on his face. Even after not having gotten enough sleep the previous night, he felt energetic and excited. All the credit belonged to Hana and her secret, of course.

Who knew a mafia leader's best friend was gonna be an undercover cop?

Namjoon sat with his head buried in his hands, his brain still trying to process everything. It wasn't just him though, every single person in the room was just as shocked as him. How did they not know? All the questions they had regarding Hana's disappearance had just been answered and no one was happy about it. Namjoon was affected, yes, but so was Jungkook.

The latter's eyes were bloodshot, his lips pale and his hands clenched as if he would knock out the next person who spoke. He felt so betrayed and lost. At first, when Rex had told him that the guy Hana met was Nelson Shaw, he had no idea who that was. But later on, as he was fed all the information, he began to connect the dots. The guy who had broken into Namjoon's house was Nelson Shaw, the same guy who Hana met and worked with. His so called sister like friend, was a police officer, trying her best to bring them down.

Jungkook slammed his fist on the table, making Rex flinch while the others didn't react at all. Rex's eyes were wide, wondering why no one else moved a muscle because Jungkook was definitely scary when angry. They were probably used to it.

"We'll get her red handed then. Alert the bouncers at the club." Yoongi voiced, earning a nod from Taehyung who quickly walked out of the room to carry out the task.

Namjoon couldn't even begin to express how mad he was. There were still questions that he wanted answers to, but he didn't even wanna look at her anymore. It was early in the morning when he had gotten a call from Hoseok, asking him to come over for an emergency. The dull tone of hoseok's voice was definitely concerning but Namjoon wasn't expecting this. That's why Shaw broke into his house. To find dirt on him and turn him in. Well, too bad. Hana was out of the game now.

Jimin chuckled bitterly, all eyes turning to him questioningly. Namjoon slowly looked up, glaring at Jimin as if to ask what was so funny. Rex raised an eyebrow, eyes flickering over to Namjoon. He could smell drama already and he wished he had popcorn. Even though he knew you-

"Tell us, Namjoon. Did you know about this?"

Jimin asked, a bitter smile planted on his lips. Namjoon frowned, tilting his head to convey that he had no idea what Jimin was trying to say. Jin sighed, closing his eyes momentarily to keep himself in check. "Jimin, just because Hana was his best friend-"

"Forget it. Let's just get over with this Hana bullshit first." Jimin interrupted, standing up abruptly and rushing out of the room. Namjoon made a mental note to talk to Jimin about this later, standing up and proceeding to go home for a while. He placed a hand on Jungkook's shoulder, squeezing it tightly to let him know that he understood what it felt like. Jungkook glanced up at his elder, nodding absentmindedly. Jungkook still wanted to ask Namjoon about you but he figured this wasn't the right time, no matter how angry he was about being left in the dark.

"Delirium at 9. I'll see you all then." Namjoon said, glancing at everyone before leaving to go back to you.

_____________________________________________

You eyed the man in the kitchen, watching his every move as he cleaned the counters passionately. You had woken up in the morning to find Namjoon gone and this new butler in the house. It was quite amusing how there was a new butler already, Walter having left just the previous night. Namjoon must be really superior, you concluded, sipping on your cup of coffee.

Your fingers grazed the bandage on your forehead, memories from last night still burning in your mind. You missed Namjoon and the way he had held you. It was as if he was trying to shield you from everything bad in the world. You couldn't understand what was going on but you certainly liked him. And now that you thought about it, it seemed inevitable. A man like him surely had many admirers. You were just another one in the crowd.

You heard the front door slam shut, your body flinching in surprise as you turned around in your seat. Namjoon entered the living room, his eyes glaring at everything that came in his way. Work must have been hard on him.

"You came back early, today." You said, smiling at him softly when he looked at you with slightly wide eyes. His expression changed within a second, the frown on his eyebrows now smoothed out completely and his lips flashing you a small smile. His legs dragged him towards you and he sat beside you, glancing at the new butler.

Sangmin was here on Rex's recommendation. According to the boy, Sangmin was as skilled as a man his age could be. Due to the urgency, Namjoon decided to take him in. Hopefully, you'd be in better hands whenever Namjoon wasn't at home.

Namjoon sighed and closed his eyes, leaning his head on the backrest. He was stressed and anxious, the upcoming events wearing him out completely. He wasn't ready to know why Hana was doing what she was doing. Did 16 years of friendship suddenly mean nothing to her? Did she forget everything that she had promised him?

"Namjoon, have you ever danced?" Your voice ran in his ears, making him immediately look at you as if you were an alien. He slowly registered your words in his brain, wondering why you would ask something like that out of the blue?

"Danced? Does head banging when I was home alone at the age of 9 count?"

You ended up throwing your head back and laughing, almost imagining what it would look like. Namjoon grinned, satisfied with the response he got from you, his heart melting at the way your eyes closed shut and crinkled. For sometime, he completely forgot the situation he was currently in. He didn't care that Hana betrayed him. He didn't care that he had lost a best friend. He just didn't care.

You stood up and proceeded to place your empty coffee cup in the kitchen, running back out and stretching your hand out to Namjoon. Namjoon frowned, eyes flickering between your face and your hand. He hesitantly placed his hand on yours, only to have you push it away.

"As much as I like your hands, I actually want your phone." You stated, shaking your hand to make him hurry up. Namjoon pulled out his phone and handed it to you after unlocking it. He leaned forward, resting his elbows on his knees and watching you as you stuck your tongue out and connected his phone to the music player at the corner of the room.

You were only trying to distract Namjoon from whatever was bothering him. Namjoon wasn't very good at hiding his despair and you understood that. His shoulders would always sulk and his smile would never quite reach his eyes. It felt bad to see him sad, knowing that you were of no help at all. So here you were, searching up a song and pressing the play button before leaving it on top of the music player. With a deep inhale, you turned around and slowly walked towards Namjoon, stretching your hand out again.

"May I have this dance, Mr Kim?" Namjoon chuckled, standing up and shaking his head. From what he had seen in movies, he knew he was supposed to be the one asking. So he bowed in front of you and placed his palm forward, glancing up at you with all the affection he could gather. Your heart fluttered, a shy smile dancing on your lips as you gently placed your hand in his. If you thought that was the best thing Namjoon could have done, then you were wrong because the next thing you knew, his lips were pressed against the back of your hand.

Keep your cool, Y/N.

You told yourself, ignoring the way Namjoon's eyes gazed at you. So much attention was surely gonna be the death of you. You bit your lip harshly to stop the grin from showing itself, Namjoon's hands finding their way to your waist. You were definitely shocked at how much Namjoon already knew.

The silence of the room had been replaced by the soft chords of a guitar, your eyes lighting up when a male voice filled your ears. This was one song that you used to listen to whenever you felt lonely and lost, pretending that you did have someone who loved you. That was far from reality when your life was all about being used like a rag but it was different now. Perhaps you could find someone who really loved you.

Maybe that person was right in front of you.

You swayed with your arms around Namjoon's neck, his feet moving in sync with yours.

Settle down with me, cover me up, cuddle me in.

Lie down with me and hold me, in your arms.

Namjoon swore his heart was being too fuzzy now. He hadn't felt this way before. Not even when he had a crush on Hana. It was so intense that Namjoon had to convince himself that he wasn't in love. At least not yet. But was he even being honest with himself?

And your heart's against my chest, your lips pressed to my neck.

I'm falling for your eyes, but they don't know me yet.

Your body was pressed against Namjoon's, your heart pounding in your chest. Your cheeks were too warm now and you felt dizzy. The air was thick, but not in an uncomfortable way. You could feel Namjoon's breath on your face, your eyes stuck on his. Life hated you, yes, but you weren't so sure anymore. After surviving your entire childhood, you were finally living. With a man who had a kind heart and was willing to do a lot for you. There was no way you would ever be able to repay him for everything he had done for you so far. At least not in this life.

And with a feeling I'll forget, I'm in love now.

Namjoon leaned closer, every ounce of self control having been lost. All he could think about now was how perfect you were. His eyes were now fixed on your lips, already thinking how good they would feel against his. He promised himself that he wasn't gonna let you go, no matter how many more lies he was gonna have to spew. No matter how many secrets he was gonna have to hide. Because you belonged with him. You were saving him and you didn't know that.

Kiss me like you wanna be loved

You wanna be loved. You wanna be loved.

You took in a shaky breath when Namjoon's hand cupped your cheek, tucking your hair behind your ear. Your hands tightly held on to each other behind his neck, your chest heaving in nervousness. You wanted this. You wanted him to kiss you. You wanted him to show you that you weren't broken. You moved your hands to the back of his head, your fingers tangling in his hair as you hesitantly pulled him towards you. You closed your eyes, his lips barely an inch away from yours. Just as Namjoon was about to close the little distance that remained, a loud clang echoed through the room, making you both flinch and pull away.

Your head whipped towards the kitchen, your eyes falling on the utensil that lay on the ground. Namjoon cursed under his breath, rubbing his forehead with his fingers. So damn close.

He clenched his jaw and walked towards the kitchen, glaring at Sangmin as you followed behind. "Sorry, Mr Kim. It slipped from my fingers." The man bowed, your head shaking in response to his apology. It was a mistake and nothing had been damaged anyway.

"That's okay. Don't worry about it. It's time for me to leave for work so I'll go get ready." You stated, turning on your heels and rushing towards your room. Your cheeks were hot and your breathing was uneven. You tapped your cheeks to pull yourself back to reality, scowling at your heart which was uncontrollably fluttering in your chest.

You closed the door to your room, leaning your back against it and sighing in relief. You weren't gonna deny the fact that you were disappointed, your work uniform mocking you from your bed. Things could have happened but here you were, dragging yourself to work without letting Namjoon know anything about your job. You pursed your lips and pulled your hair up, getting ready to go and cover your shift at Club Delirium.

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-XX

[conner-grace]

The Detective and his Little Assistant (part 4)

(Part Index)

Chapter 3: The Plot Thickens

*Warning spoilers if you haven't gotten through 6/13 in the game*

A/N-Before the chapter starts, I want to explain a couple things. First, I chose to make Kaito a witch because I identify myself as a witch, and yes, I do mean witch, not warlock, because witch is, in fact, a gender-neutral term, also due to me being a witch, everything Kito does involved with witchcraft will be based off my own experiences, knowledge, religion and opinions, so please don't tell me I'm wrong unless you can cite a reliable source for your info. Second, for those reading this, who don't know Japanese culture very well, calling someone by their first name without an honorific (-san, -kun, -chan, ect.) unless you know them very well, or they've given you permission, is highly offensive. Please remember these for future chapters :) .

Now to the story.

~~~

Monday, June 13th, After School

*Akechi's P.O.V*

I was listening to the audio data from the pen I downloaded to my phone on the way from the station to work. I was quite happy to see that it hadn't been accidentally turned off throughout the day, despite the likelihood for it to have. I was actually skipping past a bit that seemed to be a personal conversation between her and her friends, though I seemed to be the topic of their talk. If it weren't for my current opinion of Yuno, I might've even blushed at the direction the discussion was going, however, I was disgusted and just trying to get past it.

"Finally." I sigh, getting past it, not surprised that it took up all of lunch. Listening as she head's to pe. "Hmm, who should I ask for help on my homework today?" She either wonders aloud or asks her friends, judging by the steps I heard around her. Her friends offered up names. I quickly realized all the names were all from the top 10 students in the first and second years, 'but most of those kids would never-oh, yeah, blackmail'  I think, my gritting my teeth. 'Wait, thinking about it, not even Kaito-kun would've taken this lying down, so what's she got on him that he doesn't want me to know?'  I knew it as a little self-centered to think I'm the only one who mattered, but it Kaito had in fact told me that my opinion was the only one that mattered to him, and the teachers would never believe any bad rumors about him since he was the star student of nearly every class he was in. He also never cared what any of the students around him thought of him, except, after we became friends, for me. In fact, a couple months after we became friends and before I knew he considered himself a witch by his religion, a kid that that seemed to a rather bad opinion of Kaito-kun and said something about my friend cursing him or something like that. Kaito-kun seemed to not have even heard him, but then froze quickly looked to me, fear flashing through his eye like lightning before he hid it. I realized later he’d been worried about my reaction and trying to hide it. I'd ended up asking if he'd cursed our fellow student, and he'd replied he never cursed anyone, I'd then asked why out of curiosity, and he'd told me it was because cause he was selfish, and since he believed in karma, he didn't want the negative energy of a curse coming back to bite him later.

I felt an earbud pulling me out of my ear, snapping me out of my small trip down memory lane. "Oh don't worry, I've got something special planned for-" I heard through the other earbud as I paused the recording, knowing I'd have to relisten to it later after, hearing an annoyed sigh next to me that I knew belonged to Sae-san.

"Oh, sorry Sae-san. I got lost in thought it seems." I say with a practiced sheepish smile, pulling out the other earbud.

"I hope you know you were so lost in thought you nearly walked into the door." She smirks teasingly. "Maybe you should keep the music for your work-outs only."

"Guess so." I chuckle, remembering the few hours of music Kaito-kun had given for my birthday as well, that I'd put on my phone and started listening to during my early morning runs, and noticing I’d been only a couple steps from walking into the door.

"Well, let's go in then, we've got cases to get to." She smiles.

"Indeed." I smile, opening the door for her.

"Always the gentleman, thank you." She sighs with a smile, walking in.

"Of course, you're welcome." I smile, following in after.

***

Deciding not to listen to the recording until I got to my apartment, considering how I nearly walked into a door the last time I listened to it on my way somewhere. I was heading back to my apartment in the evening light, hoping Kaito-kun had actually taken the advice of my pre-scheduled messages telling him to go to bed…. even if I wasn't following my own advice. I smile, remembering where my mind had wandered before Niijima-san, and how it had ended. My mind started to drift back down memory lane, remembering how after he'd explained why he didn't curse people, he told me he'd actually reported the student for harassing a female classmate. He ran off to the bathroom after telling me that and it took a little while, however, over the next three days the problem student kept having the worst luck. One of the biggest scenes that spread around the school like wildfire, was the when girl he'd been harassing, who was actually quite sweet and quiet for the most part, slapping him across the face before admitting he'd been harassing her, causing him to get suspended. When he came back, he ran towards Kaito-kun and I at lunch, nearly falling on his face in the process, and yelled about Kaito-kun cursing him again, my friend seemed completely surprised and a little lost. Though after he left a sly smirk pulled at Kaito-kun's lips.

"I don't curse people, but I can enhance one's karma." He smirked under his breath, causing me to look at him questioningly.

"So, you had something to do with this?" I asked, though not quite believing he could.

"I'd like to think so. I mean, I did use a spell to make all he's done come back to him three times three." He smirked, snapping his fingers while saying the last word, the problem student tripping over his own feet and falling at the same time, causing his smirk to grow. "I was gonna leave it at the report and try helping the girl, but...he just kept pushing." He sighs.

I learned two things that day; 1: don't piss off the witch; 2: Kaito-kun wasn't all rainbows and shy smiles like I'd seen till that point and I'd even started putting a little more stock in mysticism and such. "I could report you." I smirked, mostly curious to see how he'd react, though not quite sure how that'd go. His reaction surprised me, his face fell slightly, though he tried to hide it as he looked down to his food and started playing with it rather than actually eating it. I'd expected him to just laugh it off, as he did with most things.

"I'd like to see how that goes down, with your rep, it might actually go a bit differently than the 20 or so other accusations." He smirked, though his voice was a little harsh.

"I-I said could, not would." I quickly stated, trying to back peddle out of this point in the conversation.

He’d pinched the bridge of his nose with an annoyed sigh. "Sorry, I'm overreacting, but you wouldn't be the first to report if chose to." He murmured.

"That's a bit obvi-"

"I meant the first I considered a friend to do so." He specifies with a sigh, making me freeze, realizing what the statement meant, 'he's...used to being betrayed, so when the possibility of it happening comes up, he immediately goes on the defensive'

***

I went straight to my computer after locking my door, hooking my phone up to it so I could better analyze and actually edit the recording so I could only keep what was actually important and discard what wasn't, 'like the first disgusting 30 minutes' I think, deleting that time from the file. Starting back at the beginning of Yuno's talk with her friends. "Hmm, who should I ask for help on my homework today?" I knew whoever she asked for help, probably didn't have an actual choice They talked for a few minutes, before settling on a female student who was 2nd place to Kaito-kun in his class, however one of the other friends piped up. "What about Kaito?" I froze, my worries confirmed that he was a target. I could feel my jaw tighten at the insult of them using his first name, especially without an honorific. "Oh don't worry, I've got something special planned for Kaito today." Yuno giggles, the rest joining her. My hand starts curling into a fist 'what the hell did you do?!' I mentally growl before skipping past, and deleting most the silence of the pe class until I heard Yuno talking to the girl she chose for helping with her homework. Judging by the girl's voice, I was right in assuming her victims at least don't feel like they had a choice in helping her. While she was heading to her next her next class, she told her friends about taping notes to Kaito-kun's locker 'so that's why he seemed a little off after school' I think, feeling the leather strain around my fist. Skipping past and deleting her silent work, stopping when I heard them starting on the notes for his locker, saying what they wrote mostly stupid shit, that had me grinding my teeth and wanting to punch them like 'fag', 'looser', 'freak', then I barely stopped my fist from hitting the desk with the last one, "you're lucky we're not dealing with Salem trails stupid witch". Forcing my hand to relax as I buried my head in my hands, knowing if I hadn't been wearing my gloves, my fingernails would be digging into my scalp right now as they continued.

"If that bitch used my pen to write that." I hissed, ending with a growl that many might've described as murderous as I continued listening, not even wanting to think about what else they might’ve done to him.

"Why not just go ahead and tape a picture of a vase of flowers to his locker Yuno-chan?" One of the friends snickered. "I can't do that, Kaito might freeze long enough for Goro-kun to see, or he might actually tell." Yuno giggled.

*SLAM* my hand hits the desk hard enough I might have actually bruised it hearing that. "Do. Not. Use. My. First. Name." I growled, wishing she could hear venom dripping from every word, wishing I could throttle both of them for that considering doing something like that was a way of telling someone to kill themselves.

"Why didn't you use his pen?" One of the friends smirk, causing me to sigh in relief. "Cause if he manages to find out, he'll never forgive me." Yuno sighs.

'Oh-ho-ho, we're way past no forgiveness bitch' I think with a dark chuckle, getting the last bit of evidence and wishing I had a punching bag in my apartment, as I get up and head to the bath to try and calm myself down enough to go to sleep.

 *Akira's P.O.V*

I had just got back to Lablanc after talking with everyone at the dinner, Makoto-san, third-year, and the student council president had figured out who the phantom thieves were.

"You're back-whoa, you look tired. Long day?" Sojiro-san asks from behind the counter.

'You have no idea' I think with a sigh, nodding my head to my caretaker while I was on probation. "Your day any better?" I ask, deciding to strike up some conversation.

"If slow is better, then yes." He says with a slight smirk.

"Heh, well then, guess I'll head up." I say, not having much else I could say to him.

"Actually..." Sijiro perks up slightly. "Do any students from Aoyama use the station as you?"

"Uh, yeah, Akechi Goro, we actually talked a little this morning too." I say, though figuring that wasn't who he was wondering about.

"No one else?" He asks, trying to seem disinterested...and failing.

I thought for a moment, before remembering the smaller boy that ran over to Akechi-senpai. "Yeah, actually, a boy, around my age, but a bit shorter." I answer, I definitely had Sojiro-san's attention, even if he was trying to hide it. "Akechi-senpai introduced him...Sasaki, Sasaki..." I trailed off, trying to remember his first name.

"Sasaki Kaito, he's short and rather shy?" Sojiro-san offers.