#good thing i have caya downloaded 👍🏾

[stylinsoncity]

do you think CAYA louis was attracted to harry since the first time he saw him? (i mean the one at uni not the real first time they saw each other) like genuinely attracted like when you see someone on the bus and think they’re really pretty and seem really interesting and maybe you also fantasize for a bit although you know it’s something you’ll never have

I’m not 100% sure what you mean by the real first time they saw each other. The very first time louis sees harry would have been at Oxford for Harry’s “interview” before the start of the story. I hope I’m not misremembering my own fic 😭

I think Louis spent a lot of time repressing his attraction to men in general. so the first time he sees harry, it's unlikely imo that he would have fantasized about him. In the first chapter, there’s also this moment:

“Louis looks at him for a half-second too long. And doing so annoys him in a way he doesn’t understand and can’t put his finger on.”

and I feel like that moment is the closest thing to what you’re describing. that moment is louis really being drawn in to how harry looks and acts, but the very instant he feels any sort of suggestion of attraction, he doesn't react openly to it. he feels bothered by it and quickly shuts it down.

it's also unlikely that he couldn't "put his finger on" why he was annoyed. like if he actually allowed himself to think about it, i think he'd very quickly realize he finds harry gorgeous and charming and he's annoyed because feeling those feelings is a complicated and slippery slope.

obviously louis does eventually begin to fantasize about harry and envision a reality with him that he thinks he can't have, but realistically, i think those fantasies and that sort of relentless attraction comes much later for louis, probably once he's no longer able to deny just how pretty and alluring harry is lol