#going to bed crying thx goodnight

[lululeighsworld]

anyways guess who listened to hadestown tonight and blubbered like a baby through each of the epics (it's me)

[109s]

Can you write little Hunter with Caregiver Darius? Maybe Hunter had a long day being the golden guard, and Darius is helping him relax? Thank you in advance!!

-toh-age-regression 💜💜💜

Yes of course

Hunter had had a really long and bad day with being the golden guard he just want to go to bed

But then he started to regress and he didn't know what ti do so he just started crying and daruis was in his office and heard crying he when to check who it's was hunter little prince are you OK said daruis as he dropped to the floor to see hunters eyes

Dada said hunter as he clinged to daruis

Daruis emidaly knew what was happening he took hunter to his room and got his gear here you go little prince he gave hunter a red paci and hunter started to fall asleep here you go little Prince he gave hunter a bottle hunter drank it all goodnight little Prince says Daruis as he puts hunter to bed hunter looks at Daruis and says night dada Daruis smiles as he leaves

@toh-age-regression thx

[spencessmile]

Stuck In The Middle

Pairing - Spencer Reid x Fem!Reader 

Summary - heyy, can you write a blurb maybe that the reader and Spencer get into a fight and then he goes away on a case. Next day he calls to try to fix things but the reader isn’t having any of it. Thx. 

Warnings - Angst  

Word Count - 911

And all imagines/fanfics/blurbs are written solely by me so please don’t steal my work and/or post it without my consent. 

Feedback and Comments are welcome. Happy reading! 

A/N - This fic is written from a 3rd person point of view. 

Requests are CLOSED!

** 

Spencer paced back and forth in his hotel room, one hand pressing the phone to his ear and the other twirling a pen.

Talking to her over the phone was his only source of communication even though he doesn’t like using his phone. Spencer knows it’s late back in Virginia but it’s barely the evening for him. 

“You have to tell me how this is my fault?” Spencer was pissed at himself. 

She was sitting on the floor in their shared apartment living room as she had the phone on speaker and her head rested on her palms. 

She shuts her eyes at his question, “I don’t really know, but I’m getting really tired.”

“Why can’t we talk about this when I get home?” Spencer asks. 

“It’s just going to make it worse. We’re both going to sit on this for another day and it’s only going to upset us both more. I can’t keep feeling like this, Spencer!”

Spencer? 

She never called him Spencer, only ever Spence or babe. 

“Then what do you want to do?”

“I don’t know.” 

“You have to tell me how to fix this, Y/n.” 

“Spencer I shouldn’t be the one telling you how to fix this. Relationships don’t work like that.”

“How is supposed to work then?” 

“You’re supposed to be here.” 

Spencer felt his heartbreak at her words. 

“We can’t fix this if you’re not here. This isn’t a one-person job.” 

“We can still fix this and work together,” Spencer said but truth be told he was so lost, he doesn’t know what to do. 

“No.” 

“Yes we can ba-” 

“No Spencer we can’t! In order to talk we have to be face-to-face and right now you’re in another country. We can’t fix anything over the phone. It isn’t fair to us or our relationship.” 

Spencer knows she was right about him being present and talking face-to-face. 

“So can this wait until I get home and then we can talk?” 

“Can’t you come home right now?” She asks, wiping her eyes for the hundredth to the point they felt sore. 

“I don’t know when this case will wrap up.” 

She sighs, feeling completely broken and exhausted. So tired of feeling the same way and never being able to fix it.

“Let’s wait until you get home,” Her voice is raspy from all the crying. “Until then we’re both stuck in the middle.” 

Spencer felt himself break down at her words. He doesn’t want her to feel like this. He doesn’t want her to spend another night crying herself to sleep. 

“I’m sorry that we’re stuck in the middle,” He was, he hated himself for leaving you alone. This was the worst part of his job. 

“I’m so exhausted. I’m heading to bed.” 

“Y/n, I’m sorry,” Spencer didn’t like the way she was shutting him out. 

“I’ll just wait.” 

“Please talk to me, babe. Please,” He begs for her to continue talking because he needs this. He needs to make sure that even though their relationship is hitting a bump, that she’s still okay. 

“I really need sleep, Spencer,” The tears start streaming down her face, again. 

“I’ll be home soon okay? You don’t have to say it back but I love you,” His voice was shaking as he held onto a picture of her, that was always in his wallet. 

“Goodnight.” 

The line goes dead. 

With every phone call, Spencer feels like he’s losing her a little more each time. That a little piece of their relationship falls apart and that he won’t know how to fix it. 

** 

As Spencer is driving closer and closer to the apartment he can feel his heart beating faster and faster. 

They’ve been stuck in the middle for a week now. 

Spencer drops his bags and keys on the floor as his eyes search for her. There she is in the kitchen making herself a cup of tea. She places her cup down and rushes to him, stopping a couple of steps away from him. 

“Hi,” Spencer breathes. 

“Hi,” She felt herself wanting to cry, even more, looking at him. 

He looked soft and cuddly and his hair was extra curly. She stares up at him as he looks down at her. 

“Am I allowed to kiss you? I’m not really sure if your sti-” She starts off only to be cut off by feeling Spencer’s soft lips on hers. 

The kiss made her feel like the earth was shattering into pieces and that she was finally okay. Spencer pulls in closer wanting to feel her warmth. Wanting to feel that she’s real and actually kissing him. That she was still his. 

They pull apart. 

“Are you still here?” Spencer whispers. 

“I’m right here,” She assures him. “Always will be.” 

** 

Be a lover, not a fighter. But always fight for what you love. - Unknown

[pinoyrella]

Part 2 🌸

Chapter 5, Part 2

FT: Tsukishima Kei, Yamaguchi Tadashi, Hinata Shoyo, Kageyama Tobio, Yachi Hitoka, Tsukishima Akiteru, Tanaka Saeko, Karasuno Volleyball Team, Karasuno High School + Shiratorizawa.

TW: Mild Language 

Genre: Fluff, Comedy, Angst, Coming of Age + Slow Burn 

-This part contains comedy, and fluff if you squint.

WORD COUNT: 3,200+

“A LOVE SO BEAUTIFUL” Masterlist 🌸

A/N: Here’s part 2!!! of the 3! Hope you enjoy again, hehehe! 💞💕💓

Greetings.

The sound of an alarm rings throughout the small room.

Tsukishima lets out a low groan, turning to his side to snooze the alarm, before sitting up and grabbing his glasses placed beside it, reading ‘08:00’ on his alarm.

Checking his phone, he immediately notices a notification, swiping his phone and he is taken back to the Karasuno Volleyball Club’s groupchat.

-

[KAWWWW-rasuno VB Bois 😎🏐]

Yesterday

17:16 p.m

Sawamura D. : “Tanaka did you lock up the gym?”

17:16 p.m

Tanaka R. : “OH SHIT M BAD”

17:18 p.m

Nishinoya Y. : “BWAHAAHAH RYUU”

17:19 p.m

Ennoshita C. : “You’re joking, tell me you’re joking”

17:19 p.m

Tanaka R. : “IM GOING- IM GOING BACK”

17:35 p.m

Tanaka R. : “I forgot the keys, going back again”

17: 53 p.m

Tanaka R. : “It’s locked already?”

17:56 p.m

Kiyoko S. : “Oh, Tanaka I’m sorry I just saw the messages. Hinata and Kageyama locked up the other night.”

17:58 p.m

Nishinoya Y. : “Kiyoko-san 👉🏼👈🏼🥺”

Read ✓✓✓

8 NEW MESSAGES

Today

07:42 a.m

Sawamura D. : “Good morning team, don’t forget to meet up in front of the school by 8:45”

07:43 a.m

Nuisance 1 : “DAICHI-SAN IM SO EXCITED!!! I’LL BE THERE 8:30!!!”

07:45 a.m

Nishinoya Y. : “OI HINATA THAT’S THE SPIRIT”

07:46 a.m

Nuisance 1: “NOYA-SAN!!!!!”

07:50 a.m

Sawamura D. : “ENOUGH. OTHERS ARE STILL TRYING TO SLEEP”

7:52 a.m

Azumane A. : “it’s a little too late for that…”

07:58 a.m

Sugawara K. : “listen to the captain!! n e wayz see u all in a jiffy!”

07:59 a.m

King Nuisance 2: “jiffy?”

Tsukishima rolls his eyes, exiting the group chat before heading to check his other messages.

1 NEW MESSAGE

Today

08:00 a.m

Yams: “Tsukki! Don’t forget to bring your sports glasses! See u soon!”

Tsukishima takes a mental note of what his friend sent him, replying with a ‘thx’ before exiting, and checking the last notification. It’s from you. 

5 NEW MESSAGES

Today

02:23 a.m

Y/n: “KEI!!! I know ur probably asleep right now but, I don’t think I’m gonna be able to wake up the same time as u guys.. So I hope you’ll see this message when u wake up!”

02:25 a.m

Y/n: “I hope you sleep well tonight and get a bunch of rest, you’re going to do incredible! There’s no other person who I know that can block as great as you!!!”

02:26 a.m

Y/n: “You can do it, you will do it! You’re gonna BWOOSH BAM WAPOW that big guy Ushi-something’s spikes!! I’ll be cheering you on tomorrow, don’t forget! Okay goodnight now love u!!!!”

02:27 a.m

Y/n: “ 🥺💓💖💕💘💗💞💓💘💕💓💕💓💘💖💕💓💘💗💞💕💘💓💘💖💗💞🗿💖💘💓💕💗💞“

02:28 a.m

Y/n: “AHHH I didn’t mean to send the Moai emoji please pretend it’s a heart ToT”

Tsukishima can’t help but allow a smile to creep past him, fortunately for him he was alone, in the comfort of his room.

07:07 a.m

Tsukki💞: “Thanks, see u later nerd.”

Tsukishima writes before hopping out of bed, heading straight to the bathroom.

-

“Oh? Tsukki!” Yamaguchi calls, the heads of the Karasuno volleyball team members turning as Tsukishima makes his way past the school gates, exhausted.

“TSUKISHIMA!!!!” Calls, waving his arms to his fellow middle blocker. “SHUT UP HINATA” Kageyama yells. Daichi immediately breaks up the duo, giving a deathly glare as the second years chuckle. “Sorry…” The two mumble before Yamaguchi and Yachi approach the tall blonde.

“Please place your bags in the compartment below Tsukishima-kun.” Yachi instructs, receiving a tired nod from the boy.

“Good morning kids” The group turn their heads to see as their Coach and Advisor make their way out of the school building, with a folder of documents in hand, along with a first aid kit.

“Alright, I know we’re all tired, so rest up as much as you can on the drive.” He starts before looking at the captain. Daichi nods before giving Tanaka, Noya, Hinata and Kageyama a side glare. The four immediately gulp as the team begins to board the bus.

-

The bus makes a stop as the boys inside begin to dissemble. Kiyoko and Yachi help clear the bottom cart of the bus, unloading the baggage.

“The drive didn’t seem too bad” Asahi yawns before hopping off the bus. The sound of a crow crying waking him up.

“All right, let’s go everyone!” Sugawara pushes. “Yeah” The team lets out as they begin to walk towards the entrance of the building.

Daichi stays behind as he exchanges a conversation with three of his fellow female classmates from the girl’s volleyball team.

-

“Thanks again for giving me a ride to the game Aki-nii! I didn’t know you’d be back in town so soon, did you come just to watch Tsukki’s game?” You jump out of his car as you turn to meet him on the other side.

“Shhh Y/n-chan! He doesn’t know I’m here… Well, let alone he didn’t want me to come” He adjusts his hat and sunglasses. “And it’s no problem!” He gives a thumbs up before you let out a soft laugh. “You go ahead, I’m going to wait before going in, just in case he arrived the same time as we did” You nod before waving and running off.

-

“Wow” Tanaka lets out “So this is the finals… There’re so many people.” Nishinoya turns to his brethren before reassuring him. “Ryuu, this is no time to be scared!”

The man turns immediately to him “I’m not scared!”

Nishinoya closes his eyes before looking down, placing a firm hand on his friend’s shoulder. “Listen, Ryuu. Picture this.” His gaze rises “The finals… Our opponents are Shiratorizawa. What do you think is going to happen when we play to a crowd this big?

Tanaka eyes him, confused “What’s going to happen?” Just as he questions, the sounds of girls chattering passes the two, he immediately jumps up.

Nishinoya dives, chest facing down as he extends his arms to save the ball from dropping to the floor. HUP

Tanaka jumps, higher above the net before spiking, not giving the opposite team a chance to react. BAM

The crowd of Shiratorizawa girls go wild, “AH NISHINOYA-KUN! TANAKA-KUN! YOU’RE AMAZING” They cheer excitedly.

The two let out a sexy and husky chuckle.

”Nishinoya-kun, Tanaka-kun” An angelic voice calls out, making the two turn their heads to meet miss Kiyoko Shimizu.

”D-do your best out there…” She quietly wishes before covering her face with her hands.

The two boys join hands, giving each other a look of great determination.

“Noya-san, I’m gonna do this! I’m gonna become a hero after this match!” Tanaka promises his friend, giving a snarky smile. “I’m not gonna lose, Ryuu!” Nishinoya replies, reciprocating the same snarky smile. “RWWWAAAAAAAAUURRRGHHHHH” The two growl, causing the attention of people around to judge.

Ennoshita watches besides Narita and Kinoshita unamused before his friend speaks “They seem more hyped up than usual…”

“Guts! Guts! Guts! Guts!” They scream before Ennoshita cuts them off. “Hey, you’re embarrassing us, stop screaming!” He scolds.

“I’m glad those guys never change…” Narita lets out a small laugh as the two continue their screaming.

“Guts! Guts! Guts! Guts!” The team turns their head to watch as their mates continue to scream before Daichi comes back, obviously unamused. Just before Hinata was going to join in,  “SHUT UP, YOU TWO!” The captain yells. Yamaguchi lets out a chuckle as Tsukishima lets out a sigh. “As expected…”

“Come on, let’s go!” “YEAH!”

As the team makes their way into the gym, Hinata is stopped by his two old middle school friend’s, exchanging a quick conversation before splitting and catching up to his team, before getting into yet another quarrel with Kageyama.

“Why, you!” The sound of Kageyama growling causes Tsukishima to turn and give a look of annoyance between the two.

“Hey! Stop it, you two!” Daichi scolds. “You’re wasting energy before the finals? Are you guys completely stupid?” Tsukishima butts in bluntly, watching as Kageyama continually tries to strangle Hinata.

Yamaguchi lets out a look of embarrassment as he turns to notice the gaze from others in the hallway. “Well, we might immediately lose anyways…” Tsukishima scoffs before reaching into his bag.

“Yams!!” Yamaguchi turns to notice you running your way up to him, noticing him immediately. “Y/n!” Yamaguchi greets happily. Tsukishima looks up to see your running figure as he zips his bag shut. 

Yachi’s attention turns to you before greeting you, along with the rest of the team. “Y/n! You made it!” “Yachi I told you I’d come!” You whine before taking her hands. The sound of a strap snapping causes your gaze to turn to Tsukishima, who is adjusting his sport’s glasses.

“Good grief. Come on, let’s go” The captain lets out, finally stopping the two from their escapades.

You walk in between Kiyoko and Yachi along with the team.

“All right. As soon as we put our stuff away, we’re going to warm up!” Daichi states as his team lets out a “YEP!” in sync.

“Y/n, this is where we’re going to split up for a little bit, I’ll join you up by the bleachers once official starts!” Yachi informs you and you give a small smile. “It’s no worries!” You turn to notice Tsukishima’s eyes on you, immediately looking away before making eye contact.

You turn to face the team, wishing them a good luck before making your way to Tsukishima.

“Tsukki! Remember, I’ll be cheering for you!” You give a bright smile before heading off.

The boy stands there flustered, obviously trying so hard to hide his reaction before his senior calls. “Tsukki~” Sugawara teases, ruffling the top of his head. Nishinoya and Tanaka join in on the teasing as Yamaguchi lets out a snicker.

“Alright let's go!” Daichi orders. “Let’s go!”

-

You make your way up the bleachers, finding a seat as you watch the boys practice. Getting up to watch, you rest on the railing before Kageyama looks to find you, giving you a wave. You smile giving him a wave back before finding Tsukishima in the audience.

Just as you were to call out to him, you feel a heavy weight shove you. You let out a yelp as you shut your eyes from the impact. The feeling of liquid trickling down your clothes before squeaking out an apology.

-

Kageyama watches the spilled “accident” before immediately making his way off court.

“Oi! Kageyama where are you going?!” Daichi calls, Kageyama ignoring him as he leaves through the doors.

Tsukishima turns his head to watch as the setter runs out, then looking up to find you and Manami in the audience, this doesn’t look good. His eyes widened slightly in shock, as he was about to run out to assist you- his senior calls for him. He looks between you and his senior before assisting his senior instead.

-

“I-I’m so sorry!” You yelp, feeling liquid triple down your now wet attire. You open your eyes to meet the harsh glare of Manami. “Oops, my bad.” She replies antagonistically before walking off with Watabe.

You stand there bewildered, looking down and letting out a sigh. You make your way from the bleachers to the bathroom, hoping you can dry and spare this day from being completely ruined with your soaked blouse.

-

Standing in front of the mirror, you let out a sigh of frustration and you aggressively press the layer of napkins to your blouse, trying to dry it, but it doesn’t seem to be working as much as you hoped it would.

Not wanting to waste anymore time, you toss the napkin away before making your way out, only to bump into Kageyama.

Kageyama stands in front of you, “Are you okay?” He asks quietly before you let out a small “yeah”. He takes his hand, bringing it closer to you. Looking, you watch as he is offering you his spare jersey to wear. “Oh! Kageyama it’s okay, really I-” “Please take it, you could get sick.” He states before you nod, taking it from his hands and thanking him.

Realization hits before you run behind him, beginning to push him. “Go back! You’re missing valuable time to practice, don’t worry about me!” He turns to face you, giving your head a pat before smiling slyly. He waves to you before running off, leaving you.

You quickly change from your blouse, tucking the useless piece of clothing into your little bag. You look up into the mirror and realize just how big it looks on you, draping nearly past your thighs. Zipping your bag up, you immediately make your way out of the bathroom to the bleachers.

-

“KAGEYAMA!” Hinata yells as the setter makes his way back into the court. “Kageyama-kun, are you alright?” Kiyoko asks before he nods. Explaining to her how he had watched as someone spilled their drink on you, only leaving to help you briefly. From this Yamaguchi and Tsukishima hear, they look back up to the bleachers to still find you gone. 

The two share a brief moment of silence looking at each other. Tsukishima is about to run out, before the coach calls for him. 

“Tsukishima-kun! Don’t think about leaving. Everyone get ready to line-up” He calls before Tsukishima nods, following his orders.

He looks back up to the bleachers, worried and wanting to give you his spare jersey to change into, thinking of how sitting through an entire game in wet clothes is bound to get you sick.

Yachi bids her team a ‘good luck’ before making her way off court.

-

You make your way back to the railing, just in time to meet the booming voice of your school’s Vice Principal. 

“Listen up, everyone!” He yells, you stop and turn your attention to him. “We need to cheer as loud as we can so our cheers’ becomes the players’ strength!” You let out a “right!” along with the other students, surprised by his behavior. “The vice-principal sure seems worked up about this.” You hear your classmate say to his friend besides you. “Was he always like that?” His friend replies as you let out a low chuckle.

“Go, go, Karasuno! Push it, push it, Karasuno!” The Vice Principal cheers, clapping the two cones in his hands together. The school repeats the cheer, but incredibly off sync. Causing the Vice Principal to let out another scold. “We just practiced this yesterday!” You watch as you homeroom teacher makes her way to calm him down.

“A-are they gonna be okay?” You hear the voice of another man besides you, turning to find a tall man besides another who you deemed familiar. ‘Yamaguchi’s mentor!’ You remember before turning your attention to hear a familiar voice whispering.

“I’m not anyone suspicious!” You watch as Akiteru is being pulled by gorgeous blonde baddie, making her way to the three of you by the railing. “I saw this suspicious guy wandering around!” You turn to look at the ‘suspicious man’, remembering the hat, sunglasses and face mask he was preparing when you two hopped out of his car. “He ran when he saw me, so I caught him!” ‘That is very suspicious’ you admit to yourself as she meets up to the three of you. “He could be a Shiratorizawa spy!”

And at that, you can’t help but laugh. “What?!” Shimada questions and you watch Akiteru trying to explain himself. “W-wait! I’m a relative!” He removes his sunglasses and mask, continuing his alibi. “I’m Tsukishima Kei’s older brother!” He proudly says.

“Tsukishima-kun’s older brother?!” The two men reply in shock.

“SHHHH! SHHHH! He told me not to come to the match.” You look down and notice Tsukishima glaring up to the stands, obviously aware of his older brother’s presence. You watch as Akiteru ducks under the railing, before looking down and giving him a wave. He waves back slowly before turning his focus back on his coach.

“Those two are nothing alike, especially their personalities.” The tall blonde man says to the shorter blonde woman. 

Your snickering causes the attention of the four adults to turn to you. “Huh?” You watch as the woman approaches you. “You’re so cute!” She lets out before looking down to notice your jersey. The other three adults following her gaze. 

Their eyes widen in shock, especially Akiteru’s. “Are you here for Tobio-kun?!” She asks, obviously loving the cute idea of wearing your significant other’s jersey to his game.

Akiteru watches you, awaiting your answer. Wondering if it’s true, confused on how the last time he had visited it felt so obvious you felt something for his younger brother.

“N-no that’s not it! He’s one of my friends, he offered me his spare jersey not too long ago because of an accident.” You reply, not noticing the sigh of relief Akiteru lets out.

“Awh, that would have been so cute” She replies disappointedly, resting her arm on the railing.

“I’m Saeko, Tanaka’s older sister, you can call me Saeko-nee” She winks and you are left flustered, exchanging a greeting back. “These two over there are Shimada and Takinoue” She points to the other two men, you share a greeting with them as well.

“And this one over here” She points to Akiteru. “Suspicious man” She laughs and you notice Akiteru fume again. “I told you I’m not suspicious, tell her Y/n-chan!” “Y/n-chan?” The women turns back to you. “Oh? Do you know him? Blink twice if you don’t” She jokes.

“Y-yes I do, don't worry! We actually came together. We’re neighbors!” You assure her and she lets out an ‘ah’ before you hear the familiar sound of your friend.

“Y/n-chan!” “Yachi!” She meets beside you, greeting the other four adults before her gaze falls onto your clothing.

“I-is that Kageyama’s?!” She asks flustered and you nod, explaining the same thing you have told the other four adults, not wanting her to think you had anything romantic going on with one of your friends.

The sound of a whistle blown causes everyone’s attention to turn to the court, you watch as the game begins, the team’s lining up on both ends as the reporter announces the teams. “We will now begin the Japanese National High School Volleyball Tournament, Miyagi’s Prefecture Qualifiers, Boy’s Finals.”

You watch in anticipation, feeling your heart race with excitement.

“Miyagi’s Karasuno High School. Miyagi’s Shiratorizawa Academy.”

You yell out a cheer with the crowd, watching both captains exchange a hand shake.

“Wow there's a bunch of TV crews” Saeko lets out.

“We will now introduce Karasuno High School’s starting line-up.” The speakers announce, turning everyone’s attention back to Karasuno’s side of the court. “Number 1, Sawamura Daichi. Number 3, Azumane Asahi. Number 5, Tanaka Ryuunosuke.” “RYUU!!!” Saeko cheers besides you. “Number 9, Kageyama Tobio. Number 10, Hinata Shoyo.” You let out a cheer for your two friends, before the last player is announced. “Number 11, Tsukishima Kei” With his name said, you let out an even louder cheer, with Akiteru, watching as he jogs across the court to meet his team.

Afterwards, the reporter announces Shiratorizawa’s line-up. You shake with Yachi in intimidation, watching the very tall boys jog across the court one by one.

“Ladies and gentlemen, please cheer on both teams and wish them the best.”

You let out a sigh before turning to the five people besides you. “Oh geez, I’m starting to feel nervous.” 

Let the games begin.

Part 1

Part 3

Chapter 5

[lexiraq]

Hey! for the prompts can u do some angst with #5 #31 and #93 but like with a happy ending caus i dont want my heart hurting but i like some spice. also with reddie please and thx

“why do you hate me?” + “i fucked up” + “are you high?”

word count: 2,910

ao3 link

Friday night was designated date night in the Uris household, meaning Stan had the night to himself. He was enjoying his alone time, smoking and reading his ornithology books, when there was a loud knock on the front door. Confused, Stan got up from his bed and approached the sound. Upon opening the door, he was met with a visibly upset Eddie Kaspbrak, whose face was stained with drying tears.

“Hey, what’s wrong?” Stan asked, voice dripping with concern. Eddie wasn’t one to cry a lot, especially not in front of others, so Stan knew that whatever was going on was seriously affecting the boy.

“I fucked up,” Eddie said pointedly. Stan ushered him inside and sat with him on the edge of his bed.

“What happened?” Stan asked in a comforting voice, gently rubbing up and down his best friend’s back.

Eddie sat with his head in his hands and mumbled, “Richie is avoiding me.”

Stan smirked to himself, knowing all to well what the issue was. I should’ve known it had to do with Richie. Can these idiots just figure it out already? he thought to himself.

“Why do you say that?” Stan asked, feigning cluelessness.

“Well, he hasn't wanted to hang out as much and he hasn’t made as many dumb jokes as he usually does. We’ve always been comfortable being super close but lately he’s been backing off and I don’t know what I did,” Eddie said, sounding distressed as he fell backward onto the bed. He landed on something and when he went to move it from underneath him, his eyes widened.

“Stanley, what is this?” Eddie asked, in a way that meant he already knew the answer. Stan looked over, letting out a little gasp when he saw what Eddie was holding up. Shit, he thought, I forgot I had that out.

“Oh, it’s just, uh…” he started, nervously, “pot,” he said guiltily.

“Since when do you smoke?” Eddie asked, genuinely shocked.

“I dunno,” Eddie raised his eyebrows, “It just helps me relax, okay? Let’s get back to your problem,” Stan said defensively.

Eddie sighed, “Right. That. I don't know what to do Stan,” he said desperately.

“While that’s certainly weird behavior coming from Richie of all people, the only way you’re gonna figure this out is by talking to him,” Stan said.

“Don’t you think I’ve tried that? I haven't even been able to talk to him long enough to bring it up! He runs off as soon as he can!” Eddie said impatiently.

“You need to confront him, make him talk about it. Even if he doesn't want to. You deserve an explanation and no one can give it to you but him,” Stan said.

“How do I do that? We’re never alone at school and every time I call his house he says he’s busy. He won’t talk to me,” Eddie said.

“Show up unannounced. Maggie loves you, and she’d be more than happy to let you in to see him, or to let you wait for him if he really is busy,” Stan said.

Eddie let out a big sigh, “Okay, I’ll go in a little while. You don’t mind if I stay here and calm myself down first, right?” he said.

“Not at all. I’m always happy to help in a crisis,” Stan said with a smile.

Eddie gave a small laugh, “Yeah,” he said, eyes scanning the room. His gaze landed on something and his curiosity peaked, “Hey, does this really work?” he asked, picking up the bag of pot.

“It takes the edge off, yeah. Why do you ask?” Stan said, confusion evident on his face.

“Could I, uh…try some?” Eddie asked nervously.

Stan’s eyes widened, “Um, are you sure you want to?” Stan asked, growing less confused and more concerned.

“Well you said it takes the edge off, and I don’t know if you noticed, but I’m very on edge right now,” Eddie said.

“Well, I guess you could try some, but only a little. If you’re really sure,” said Stan.

“Okay how do I do this?” Eddie asked. Stan showed him carefully and watched with caution as he took his first hit. After a few minutes, he admitted, he felt a little better.

“Glad it helped. I’m shocked Eddie, I didn't think this would be your thing,” Stan said.

“How do you think I felt when I found it in your room of all places?” Eddie said with a smirk.

“Fair point. Just don’t tell the other losers, please?” Stan asked seriously.

“Your secret’s safe with me,” Eddie said sincerely.

“Now let’s get you off to see your lover boy!” Stan said.

“He is not my lover boy,” Eddie said, appalled.

“We’ll see about that,” Stan mumbled to himself.

“What?” Eddie asked.

“Nothing. Now, off you go!” Stan said, ushering his friend out the front door. Before he closed the door, Eddie turned and gave him a hug.

“Thank you, Stan,” he said, before walking down the steps and off to Richie’s.

—

Eddie approached the Tozier household and knocked on the door. He waited a few seconds before nerves started to bubble up inside him once again. The door opened a beat later and he was greeted with a smile from the lovely Maggie Tozier.

“Hello, Eddie! What a nice surprise, we haven't seen you in a while,” she said in the cordial way she always does.

“That’s actually why I came. Is Richie here?” Eddie asked.

“No, sorry. He left about an hour ago. He said something about meeting you kids at your ‘secret spot,’” Maggie said.

The clubhouse, Eddie thought.

“Do you want to come in and wait? I don’t know how long he’ll be, but we have leftovers from dinner if you're hungry,” Maggie said invitingly.

“No, thank you. I know where he is now, I’ll go find him,” Eddie said with a thankful smile. He turned on his heel and ran down the street.

—

Eddie slowed his pace and began thinking of what to say to Richie, but it only made him more nervous. There were a lot of things he wanted to say, but very few he would be willing to admit aloud. As he got closer to his destination, he found himself pulling something out of his back pocket. It was pot he snuck out of Stan’s house.

Maybe it wasn't the smartest move to sneak it out, but he wanted it, just in case he needed another wave of relaxation. He took some, well, a lot, and by the time he got to where he needed to be, he felt serene. He opened the hatch and started climbing down the ladder, missing a step in his haze and falling to the floor. By the time he realized what happened, there were hands on his shoulders and a voice saying his name.

“Eddie, are you okay?” the voice asked, full of concern.

“Richie?” Eddie said, hyper aware of the boy kneeling in front of him.

“Yeah, it’s me. Are you okay?” Richie replied, emphasizing his previous question.

“I’m fine. I need to talk to you,” Eddie said firmly.

“Oh, um, okay,” Richie said warily. He didn't want to do this right now, but he didn't have an excuse to leave and he was too worried about the hard fall Eddie just took. He helped the boy up and gestured toward the hammock. Eddie started to walk over, but Richie noticed how disoriented he was and could smell the drugs on him.

“Are you high?” Richie asked, stunned.

“Maybe a little,” Eddie said with a giggle.

“Why? How did you even get pot in the first place?” Richie asked, dismayed.

“Doesn’t matter. What does matter is you avoiding me,” Eddie said in an accusatory voice.

Richie looked down, “I didn’t mean to, I just—“

“Why do you hate me?” Eddie asked wistfully.

Richie looked up quickly, “What? Eddie, I could never hate you,” he said reassuringly.

“Then why have you been acting this way?” Eddie demanded.

“I just—I’ve been scared!” Richie said.

“Scared of what?” Eddie cried.

Richie paused for a moment, thinking. “I want to tell you, I do, but I don’t want to lose you,” he said, voice breaking.

Eddie grabbed his hand, “You’re not gonna lose me, Rich,” he said.

Richie looked up and they locked eyes, and he could tell that Eddie meant what he said.

“Okay,” he said quietly. “But not right now. Not when you’re high. How about you stay the night at my place and we’ll talk in the morning, yeah? That way your mom doesn't see you like this and I can make sure you're safe,” Richie offered.

“I’d like that. I’m holding you to your word, Tozier,” Eddie said.

“I promise,” Richie said holding out his pinky. Eddie intertwined it with his own.

Richie let out a quiet laugh, “Okay, let’s go.”

—

Richie got Eddie into his house and upstairs with no problems. His parents were happy to see the two of them hanging out again, they gladly let Eddie sleepover and offered to call his mom to let her know.

Eddie got under the covers as Richie started making himself a makeshift bed on the floor.

“Oh, come on. You know you don’t have to do that. This is what I was talking about earlier, you won’t even sleep in the same bed as me anymore,” Eddie said, sounding more upset than he intended.

Richie didn't have a good argument, and he was tired, so he succumbed and said, “Well, if it bothers you that much. Move over.”

Eddie obliged and Richie turned off the light before making himself comfortable under the covers. That is, if comfortable meant stiff as a board. At this point, Richie knew Eddie didn’t mind sharing a bed with him, but that didn’t stop those intruding thoughts from reminding him how revolting his touchiness and neediness must be. He stayed there, unmoving, until Eddie rolled into his side and threw an arm over his torso. Richie froze.

“You know, you haven’t called me Eds or Eddie Spaghetti in a week,” Eddie said quietly.

“I thought you hated it,” Richie said.

“Yeah well...I miss it,” Eddie paused, “I miss this...I miss you,” he finished, burrowing deeper into Richie’s side.

“I didn’t know you cared so much,” Richie replied.

“I do care, Richie. I care so much. I don’t know what I did but this past week without you has been horrible,” Eddie said.

“You have the others,” Richie mumbled.

“I know and I love them, I do, but they’re not you,” Eddie said, getting quieter during the last part.

Richie didn’t know what to say to this, so he ended the conversation before it could go any further, “Goodnight, Eddie.”

Eddie sighed sadly, “Goodnight,” he said, rolling away from Richie, despite wanting nothing more than to stay wrapped up in his warmth until morning.

—

Richie woke up first, but instead of letting himself admire the sleeping boy, he started getting ready for the day, distracting himself from thinking about the coming conversation. He took a shower, brushed his teeth, threw on some clothes, then returned to his room to find Eddie sleepily stretching.

“Good morning. How do you feel?” Richie asked.

“I’m thirsty and my mind is kinda hazy but I’m okay other than that,” Eddie said.

“Hold on,” Richie ran out of the room and came back soon after with a glass of water. “Here,” he said, holding it out for Eddie to take.

“Thanks,” Eddie said, grabbing it and taking a big drink. “Okay, you promised me we would talk now, so talk.”

“Okay...” Richie said, hesitantly sitting next to the boy. “Lately I’ve been thinking, well, over-thinking would be a better term, and I realized how touchy and needy I am. I’m worried you think it’s gross and annoying. I’m worried that you’ll grow to hate me if you don’t already, so I distanced myself to prevent that from happening,” Richie said honestly.

“Richie...” Eddie said sadly. “Why would you ever think that? Have I somehow lead you to believe I don’t want you around? I know we jokingly bicker but I never mean any of it, you’re my favorite person for fucks sake, so please please tell me if I hurt your feelings,” Eddie pleaded.

“It’s not your fault. My logic is, I hate myself, so why wouldn’t everyone else hate me too? I’m worthless. I don’t know why you guys have put up with me for so long,” Richie said.

Eddie engulfed him in a hug, rubbing his back soothingly. “There is nothing to ‘put up with.’ Yeah, you’re loud and make crude jokes and like to mess with us, but those are few of the many reasons we admire you. There are so many people that love you, your parents, the losers, me, don’t you ever forget that. I don’t care how ‘touchy and needy’ you get, I’m always happy to be on the receiving end. And if you ever feel bad like this again, please talk to me and I’ll gladly remind you how wonderful you are because I refuse to let you believe any of this shit you tell yourself,” Eddie said, hugging the boy tighter.

“That’s just it, Eddie. I hear what you’re saying but I can’t understand it. I don’t get how you could care that much about me when I’m such a burden. My head constantly tells me you do it out of pity, and whose to say that’s not true?” Richie said, crying quietly into Eddie’s shoulder.

“Richie. Look at me,” Eddie said sternly, pulling back from the hug. “I say that’s not true. It’s bullshit. Don’t you get it? You’re everything to me. And let me tell you something, the world could end tomorrow and I wouldn’t give a shit! But if I had to live without you, I think I might just fall apart, if this week is anything to go by. I’ve been a mess thinking you hated me, just miserable! It’s pathetic how much I missed you, ask any of our friends,” Eddie said earnestly, not even caring that he practically spilled his love all over the place. If it meant Richie was happy, well, he’d do anything.

Richie sat stunned, tears free flowing and hands shaking. It took him a moment to comprehend everything Eddie just said, but as soon as he did, he couldn’t stop the words from tumbling out of his mouth, “I love you so much. I-I’m in love with you,” he said, voice breaking.

“Is that what you were scared to tell me?” Eddie asked.

Richie just nodded solemnly.

“Oh, come here, dumbass,” Eddie said, tugging at Richie’s shirt and smashing their lips together. The kiss was slow and ardent, conveying all the years of devotion the two felt toward each other. Richie pulled back first, dazed and confused.

“Are you fucking with me?” he asked, worried.

“No! I love you too, you idiot,” Eddie said.

“Seriously?” Richie asked, raising his eyebrows.

“Yes! I have for years! I love your nerdy face, your dumb jokes, and your horrible fashion sense. I love the warmth I feel when you hug me, and the way your hand fits in mine. I love the way you make me feel safe no matter what, and most importantly, I love you, Richie Tozier, and I’ll spend my entire life reminding you of that,” Eddie said, gently lifting Richie’s hand and placing a soft kiss to his knuckles.

“You’re wondrous, Eddie my love,” Richie said, reaching a hand up to Eddie’s cheek. He got close and hesitated, afraid to touch the boy, in case the facade he so feared wore down and Eddie vanished right in front of him. Eddie sensed this, and leaned into Richie’s hand.

“I’m not going anywhere. I’m all yours, baby,” he said softly, turning his head slightly to kiss Richie’s palm. The taller boy’s breath hitched, feeling so overwhelmed with love that he didn't know what to do. Luckily, Eddie took charge, inching closer and closer until he was in Richie’s lap.

“Be my boyfriend?” Eddie asked.

“I would love nothing more,” Richie said, beaming.

“Fantastic. Now that that’s settled…I believe you have a week of being gone to make up for. How do you plan to do that?” Eddie said expectantly.

“What would you say to a one-way trip to Tozier Town full of kisses and cuddles galore?” Richie said, giggling.

Eddie rolled his eyes, “I’d say ‘take me away, funny man,’” he laughed, throwing his arms around the boy. Richie leaned in and captured his lips, gently laying him back on the bed and flipping them over. He pulled Eddie down into his arms and they stayed there for hours, reveling in each other’s warmth. It came time for Eddie to go home, but before he let him leave, Richie held the boy tighter and peppered his face with kisses.

“What was that for?” Eddie said, slowly getting up and smiling.

“Because I can,” Richie said, admirably grinning at his boyfriend. Eddie blew a kiss from his place in the door and turned to walk down the hall.

When he reached the top of the stairs, he heard a fairly loud “Goodbye, Spaghetti!” from the direction he just came from. His heart swelled at the nickname and he hovered on cloud nine the whole way home.

[notveryglittery]

(in)competent

summary: he had to do at least one thing right today. words: 2,500 / ship: royality (platonic or romantic) warnings: self-esteem issues, negative thoughts, feeling useless, lots of crying notes: i had a bad day and i had old patton angst i'd been wanting to write that happened to relate directly to how i was feeling. pun credit goes to @do-your-socks-have-holes-in-them, thx nick. read on ao3.

Was it possible for Patton to be too emotional? He’d been pacing back and forth in his room for the last half hour, thinking about it. He represented Thomas’ emotions! He couldn’t be too emotional! Could he? Well, normally, he handled them pretty well. Sure, he hid the bad ones in the past, but he’d gotten better about it! He let the others know if he was having an off day, or if he needed a second cookie, or if he wanted a hug. He didn’t mope quietly in his own room, or hide behind fake smiles, or say he was fine when he actually wasn’t. He sought out his famILY for help. He was open and honest to Thomas about his ups and downs.

So why then, today, was he keeping to himself?

Patton didn’t want to blame Logan. Really! It wasn’t Logan’s fault that Patton was too emotional but… did he have to say it so harshly? Patton realized after it’d happened that it wasn’t the comment that had bothered him but the tone it’d been delivered with. Logan had a temper, they all knew this, but it was usually directed towards Roman. That wasn’t any better, of course! Roman didn’t deserve Logan’s hostility, even if he did dish it back with ease. It’d just made Patton realize that he wasn’t used to being on the receiving end of Logan’s ire. Usually, Logan just expressed frustration with Patton’s puns or dismissed his silliness entirely. Sure, that hurt pretty badly, too, but Patton had grown used to it.

Today, though… Logan had snapped at Patton for not having a good enough grip on his feelings regarding a recent crush and had said Thomas was suffering because of it. They had more important things to do than daydream about the color of his eyes or what it would feel like to hold his hand. He’d actually sounded angry and had taken a step back after berating Patton for three long minutes. “Just…” He had sighed, pinching the bridge of his nose. “You’re being too emotional. Give me an hour, won’t you?”

Patton looked at the cat clock on the wall. It’d been forty five minutes since Logan’s request. Patton’s room certainly wasn’t helping with his mood. He worried his bottom lip between his teeth. He glanced back and forth, from the door leading to the hallway, to the door leading to Memory Lane. Going into Memory Lane would only make things worse in the long run and Patton knew this, he was fully aware of what a bad decision it would be, but… Short term, a trip to some of Thomas’ happier memories would make him feel better in the now and…

Patton shook his head and stormed out of his room with determination. He flinched at the door slamming behind him but continued on shortly after, just a bit further down the hall. He hesitated in front of the decorated door for just a moment before he knocked. It sounded exactly like Anna’s knock but he resisted singing about building snowmen.

The door creaked open and Patton hurriedly put on a smile (no, Patton, bad, why are you hiding, you should know better). Virgil looked tired and he still had one earbud in. He seemed happy to find Patton at the entry. “Hey, Patton.”

“Hiya, kiddo!” Patton chirped, rocking a bit on his feet. “I was wondering, do you wanna help me make dinner tonight?”

Virgil shuffled a little awkwardly, rubbing the back of his neck. “I’m actually… in the middle of something.” He glanced surreptitiously behind him and into his room. Patton resisted the urge to lean around and get a look. “It might take me through dinner to finish.”

“Virge,” Patton said, only slightly scolding, “you’ll make sure to eat, though, right?”

“Yeah, yeah.” Virgil laughed in that breathless huff sort of way, the one that always made Patton’s heart beat extra fast. “I will but it’s… this project is really important to me.” Virgil sounded the way Roman did when he spoke about something he was super duper proud of.

“Okay,” Patton smiled and found it felt less unnatural than before. “As long as you comb down for food at some point, busy bee!” Patton clasped his hands tightly behind his back, waiting for the joke to land, waiting for another quiet chuckle from Virgil, to be blessed with one of those rare smiles.

It never came.

Virgil gave him a little wave with his fingers before turning away and shutting the door.

Patton’s entire frame shrunk, his expression crumbling. Tears pricked hot at the corners of his eyes. Too emotional and you can’t even get Virgil to smile? Wow, Patton, way to go, you’re on a roll today. Before he could start crying in front of Virgil’s room, Patton hurried down the staircase and into the living room. He sniffled and used the sleeves of his cardigan to wipe at his damp cheeks. 

“It’s fine,” he muttered to himself, “no big deal.”

And it might have been fine if Patton had a moment to collect himself. It might have, eventually, not been a big deal, if he’d had just a second to pull himself together. In the very next breath however, Patton was hit with the realization that Thomas hadn’t talked to any of his loved ones today. It came at him like a ton of bricks and Patton collapsed to the floor, gasping. He clutched at his heart, as if he could pull the aching thing from his chest.

Not a single text from Joan or Talyn, not one phone call from Mom or Dad. Thomas hadn’t had a chance to respond to fans on Twitter or Tumblr. Even Kenny, Kenny who responded nine times out of ten, hadn’t answered. It was entirely possible that everybody was busy, or their phones had died, or they hadn’t seen the messages, or they were sleeping, or they hated Thomas, and never wanted to talk to him again—

Patton pulled his cardigan off completely and stifled a sob into the fabric. Not that one, he tried to think through the pain, don’t overreact, Patton, you’re being too emotional. He practiced what Virgil had taught them. He inhaled for four seconds, and held for seven seconds, and exhaled for eight seconds. He did it three times before the panic started to subside and then for another three rounds before he could finally breathe easy. 

“It’s fine,” he said with far more certainty this time, even as his voice came out raspy and choked.

He sat still on the floor for another half hour, feeling too sore from his limbs going so tense from the fear that had gripped him so suddenly. He’d make sure Thomas replied to some fans online before bed. He would send goodnight, I love you texts to all his friends and family. It would be okay. He had to stop making mountains out of molehills.

Eventually, he made it to the kitchen, with blurry, tear filled vision and on wobbly legs. When it took three tries to pour a glass of water, he found himself crying into a dish towel. He couldn’t decide if he ought to make something simple or something complicated. On the one hand, an easy to make dish would guarantee he couldn’t mess anything else up. He’d already made enough mistakes today; it wasn’t like he needed another. Then again, if he went complex, it would keep his mind off of how incompetent he’d been so far.

It took another fifteen minutes but Patton finally had the makings of dinner figured out. He’d started a Spotify playlist on his phone, electing to choose a sad one. Why not try to get all the sad out at once, right? He was careful as he made the spaghetti, trying his best to not cry into the sauce or noodles. He’d use regular salt because he knew how to cook and pasta was easy, he’d done it lots of times before, and so what if he wasn’t particularly hungry? So what if the scent of various herbs were making him a bit nauseous and all he wanted to do was crawl into bed and sleep until morning?

He had to make dinner for his kiddos. He had to do at least one thing right today.

So focused on his task and making sure nothing else went wrong, Patton was entirely unaware that he was no longer alone.

“Darling?”

Patton startled, dropping the wooden spoon. Red sauce splattered everywhere. That was the final straw, apparently, because Patton lasted all of two seconds before tears were streaming down his cheeks again. Loud, unapologetic sobs spilled from his lips, even as he tried to wrap himself up in his own arms, crouching down to the floor.

“Patton!”

“I’m sorry! I know I ke-keep messing up t-today.” Patton tried desperately to stop the flow of tears, pressing the heels of his hands against his eyelids. 

He heard the click of the stovetop dials being turned off. Good job, Patton, you almost set the house on fire. An arm wound around his upper back and underneath his legs. He wasn’t sure how it was managed, given his awkward position, but quite suddenly, he was being lifted up.

Hiccuping a little, Patton wiped at his eyes and blinked at whoever was carrying him. Roman’s jaw was set but he looked concerned. Patton wondered if today had felt so off because Roman had been away on an adventure. He had told all of them that it would take the better part of the day and that he may or may not make it back in time for dinner. 

Can’t even have dinner ready for Ro after a long day of questing, Patton thought miserably, you’re so useless. You can’t do anything right.

“Come now, dearest, let me see that pretty face of yours.”

Patton stubbornly refused, tilting his chin down. He knew his eyes were red, his cheeks flushed and blotchy. His khakis were stained with tomato sauce and he felt even worse about making a mess on the couch. Roman’s fingers carded through his hair and Patton whimpered. He leaned away from Roman’s touch. He hadn’t done anything to deserve being comforted, no matter how badly he wanted it.

“Patton,” Roman drew his name out and he was so startled to hear the Dad Voice from Roman that he did finally look up. His expression was patient but stern. “You help us all the time. Let me help you.”

It was silent for what felt like a very long time but Roman never once fidgeted or sighed or showed any signs of irritation at having to deal with Patton’s struggle. Why was it so hard to talk about what had happened? Roman was normally so easy to talk to. They were both so open with their feelings, so unabashed about the way things affected them. Roman reached forward and carefully took one of Patton’s hands in his own.

Patton clung to it like a lifeline and took a deep breath. “Nothing’s gone right today, Ro.” He mumbled, keeping his gaze trained on their interlocked fingers. “I was messing everything up being too emotional, and I got upset because a dumb joke didn’t get even get a smile, and then I overreacted because Thomas hasn’t talked to any of his loved ones, and I couldn’t even make dinner in time for you, you must be so hungry, I let you down, I’m sorry—”

Roman was smiling. Patton’s heart leapt into his throat.

“You absolute cinnamon roll,” he used their linked hands to pull Patton closer. “Too good for this world, too pure.” Roman rested his forehead against Patton’s. He closed his eyes but Patton kept his open, confused. “You represent emotions. You might go overboard sometimes but that’s okay. The alternative is bottling them up and that’s worse.” He blinked, meeting Patton’s bewildered look, “right?”

Patton swallowed. His tongue felt heavy in his mouth. He gave the tiniest of nods.

“Maybe they didn’t hear your joke,” Roman continued. He lifted Patton’s hands to his lips and kissed his knuckles. “Maybe they did hear the joke and didn’t get it and felt embarrassed about asking you to repeat it. It’s perfectly alright that you got upset. That’s allowed.”

Patton’s eyelids fluttered as he tried to stop from crying again. It didn’t work and his eyes stung as more tears fell. How much longer until he ran out completely?

“These kinds of things happen,” Roman reassured, using his free hand to swipe his thumb underneath Patton’s eyes. “There’s so much that could have happened there. If we think about all of them, we’d never stop.”

Roman moved back just a bit and took Patton’s face in his hands. Patton, with nothing to hold onto, clasped his hands together in his lap. “And finally, last but certainly not least.” Roman held Patton’s gaze with fierce intensity. “You could never ever let me down.”

With that, Roman pulled away. He snapped his fingers and the two of them were in their holiday sweaters and cozy sweatpants. He opened his arms wide for Patton. He hesitated (because did he really deserve to be cuddled, did he deserve to be treated this kindly, after messing up all day, and doing such a bad job of what he was supposed to be) but Roman wiggled his fingers and Patton broke. He gave the royal a watery smile before climbing into his lap and curling up there, tucking his head underneath Roman’s chin.

“I love you,” Roman said and Patton focused on the rumble from his voice as he spoke, on the steady beat of his heart, of his chest rising and falling with each breath. “I’ve had these days. The ones where you don’t feel good enough, or like nothing you do is worth it, or when you’re sure everything’s gone wrong and it’ll never get better.”

Patton’s hand fisted in Roman’s sweater.

“You remember what you told me on one of those days?”

Patton was growing sleepier by the moment and so he shook his head guiltily.

“No, it’s okay,” Roman kissed the top of his head. “We keep moving forward. Straight from a Disney movie itself.” Roman chuckled. “We find the light in the dark. And I don’t know about you, but I think snuggling with a Prince is pretty lit.”

Patton giggled. Roman gave a delighted gasp at the sound.

“You go ahead and take a nap, okay, honey bunches of oats?” Roman gently ran his fingers through the hair at the back of Patton’s head. “I’ll wake you up in a bit.”

True to his word, Roman woke Patton up roughly an hour later. The table was being set by Virgil when Patton came to. He apologized profusely for having missed the joke and for not having checked on him sooner and Patton had shot a halfhearted glare at Roman for telling. Logan, immediately after setting the serving dish of pasta down on the dining table, had offered Patton an apology as well. When they all sat down for dinner, Roman entertained them with the story of his adventure in the Fantasy Realm.

Patton wasn’t fixed completely just yet but with Virgil smiling warmly at him, and Logan giving the table his full attention as opposed to being distracted with a book, and Roman holding his hand so tightly the entire time… Well, he was getting there.

[littledreamybeth]

Can you feel my love?

I usually didn’t plan to write anything for a while but then this concept popped up :D Hope you enjoy it! Please, leave feedbacks behind! It’s not that difficult to write one little sentence. Tell me if you liked it or not, that’s already enough for me :) Thx <3 (both pictures are not mine!!!)

Nothing better could ever describe the feeling of coming home to the person you love the most and letting yourself being wrapped in their arms, drowning yourself in the warmth of their body after a long day at work.

Once Harry unlocks his front door and steps into the safety and security of his apartment, he lets out a relieved sigh. Spotting his girlfriend sitting cosily on his couch, wearing one of his sweaters and munching on a crisp from the package in her hand while watching another episode of Friends, a smile makes its way on his lips. Throughout the day he has missed her so much. His day has started by waking up early in the morning and not being able to say goodbye to his love who still was sleeping by that time he had to leave to the studio, staying there till the late hours of the day. Of course, Harry couldn’t bring himself to wake her up- she looks very cute when she sleeps- so he let her dwell longer in the land of dreams, giving her a kiss on her forehead before he went off.

“Welcome back!” He hears her voice calling from the living room.

Striping off his boots from his feet, he strolls to his girlfriend who still has her eyes glued on the TV screen. With an exhausted sigh, he lets himself falling smoothly onto her body, being already awaited by the longing arms of Y/N. She catches him and presses his head gently against her chest.

“Hey, love,” Harry mumbles, enjoying the sensation that her fingers leave behind when they brush through the long strands of his hair. He hums contently, burying his face closer into her chest. The soft beating of her heart hitting his ear is enough to lull him to sleep.

“How was work?” Y/N inquires.

“Tiring. Had a meeting in which we settled the tour days, interviews and stuff.  Sat in this conversation hall for hours.”

“Awww, my poor baby,” Y/N remarks with a giggle.

“The boys say hello. Niall’s invited us for barbecue for some time. Thinks we all need to get together before tour starts again. Would be lovely to hang out, I think.”

“It definitely would. I have some leftovers in the fridge and if you’d like I can warm them up.”

Harry shakes his head. “Had something to eat already. Went out with ma pals once I finally got out of that hell of studio.”

“Drama queen.”

Harry lifts up his head and rolls his eyes at her. “What were you up to all day? Sorry I couldn’t text you that much. Like I’ve said, I was trapped between those four walls.”

“It’s okay,“ Y/N says, petting his hair. “Nothing much actually. I’ve gone shopping with Ella and we had lunch together at some restaurant. Came back home and haven’t left the couch since.”

Y/N has been busy with college and studying that she had no chance to relax properly. Now that she has finally finished all her exams, she thought she rewarded herself with a lazy afternoon on the couch while watching her favourite series.

She earns a nod from him. “Missed you...”

“I missed you too, Harry.” Her lips meet his forehead. She feels his body getting heavier on hers and notices that he’s at the verge of falling asleep on her. Not that she would ever complain, she actually loves to watch him a lot when he sleeps but Harry seems so tired and fatigued from his day, it would be better for him to go to bed right now.

Before she can address her thoughts to him, Harry gets up and kisses her lips gently.

“I’m off to bed, love,“ he informs her. “Don’t stay awake for long, okay?”

“Will do. Let me just watch this episode and then I’ll join you.”

She watches him passing the corner of the hall and after turning left he’s out of her sight.

Not an hour later, she silently opens the door to their bedroom, only to catch her angel lying in between the comfy white sheets of their bed.

(Note: Imagine Harry with long hair)

Her hear melts to the sight. Every day she falls more in love with this man and there are even times in which she really questions if he’s real or just a product of her imagination. But he’s real than a human could ever be. He’s a blessing to this world, she’s figured this out long time ago.

She strips out of her clothes and slips next to Harry.

His hair is sprawled all across the pillow, even masking a little bit of his face and soft snores escape his slightly open lips. What a true honour it is to witness him in this vulnerable state. After one year of dating, Y/N still can’t believe that the Harry Styles from One Direction has chosen to love her, and only her. She’s no one famous with no special reputation, just a normal girl from London but with a personality as golden and pure as it ever could be- enough to attract Harry’s attention.

She brushes his curls from his face and observes his features. Her heart doing flips while she watches him.

“My sleeping beauty,” she whispers softly in his ear. Harry doesn’t stiff at all. He sleeps hard like a stone. One of her hand glides around his bare stomach, tightening its hold on him while her other hand caresses his messy hair. Her face bents forward, letting her lips meeting the base of his jaw where she puckers tiny little kisses on the soft skin.  

“I love you so much,” she tells him. She really loves to murmur sweet nothings in his ear while he sleeps. By this way, she often gets the courage to tell him unspeakable things which she would never say to him out of embarrassment even though there is nothing she has to feel uncomfortable about. What she doesn’t know is that Harry sometimes-if he isn’t tired enough- pretends to be falling asleep just because he absolutely adores listening to the wonderful things she says that build him up.

Harry mostly radiates self-confidence but even he has his insecurities as well.

“You’ve worked so hard on your dreams and I’m so proud how far you’ve come. Despite all the media attacks, all the fame and all the stress you go through every day, you still manage to keep your feet on the ground and I really admire that. I love how you try to make people happy, I love how you try to make up your time for sick children and teenagers only to put a smile on their faces. I love how you try to make their wishes to meet you come true. You support so many communities and charities, Harry, people like you rarely exist in this world. They try to break you but you reach out to them with kindness. You have such a large fan base that’s got your back, even elder people do like you Harry, I really adore this. I recently saw a post on Instagram in which a girl describes how much her father likes you and your music and I kind of had to laugh about it. It’s adorable.”

She nuzzles her face on his shoulder blade. “I love your freaky side, the way you try to entertain people and make them laugh. I love your serious side and how you always put the ones you love first, also when it comes to their safety. But I also love your vulnerable side, you may think that it’s not normal for men to cry but it is. It is okay to feel down at times. We’re all human beings. Even Harry Styles.”

Kissing the skin of his shoulder, she continues.

“Thank you for everything you do for me. I’ve never fell for somebody as hard as I fell for you. You make me feel so special and so loved. You showed me the wonderful side of this world. I owe you for a lifetime. There is no place I ever want to be except by your side.”

Being slightly overwhelmed by her emotions, Y/N suppresses the tears in her eyes.

“I’ll see you in the morning, H,” she yawns, feeling her limbs slowly getting heavier, cuddling closer against him, her front meeting his back.

“Goodnight, my shining star.”

[some-rfa-imagines]

hii!!!! can i please request an angsty hc with rfa and their reaction to where the bomb in rika's apartment actually goes off cuz some burglar tries to break in and they only found out about it thru ur goodbye messages in the chatroom before u die?? thx thx and hope youre having a night day or night!! :D

yikes apparently you want to see me cry, okay i see how it is lolol

lets do this;;;;

p.s this is v long (rest under the cut) and anything [in square brackets] is a text.

NOTE: OMG IM SO SORRY YOU ASKED FOR HDC BUT I MADE A SCENARIO INSTEAD IM AWFUL PLEASE TELL ME IF YOU’D LIKE THIS CHANGED INTO HDCS I FEEL TERRIBLE. 

tw: bomb, guns, death.

 PLEASE READ AT YOUR OWN RISK.

It was cold. The clock had just hit 2:30 am. The faint sounds of the city filled the silence of the apartment. You sat at your desk, polishing up some minor details for the party. Only a few more days until you got to meet everyone and you were incredibly excited. While you were still concerned about the bomb and the hacker, you trusted Seven and V to deal with it - and if they couldn’t do it, Jumin was incredibly reliable. So you put your worries to rest and all of your efforts went into the RFA party.

Besides, if anything did go wrong (which you doubted would happen) you had a will and letters to go to all of your loved ones, both of which were safely kept in your own home. But everything would be fine anyway, so they really weren’t necessary.

You quickly emailed the rest of the details to Jaehee, answered some guests and bid goodnight to Yoosung who was complaining about LOLOL server maintenance. Shutting your laptop, you stood up to brush your teeth and prepare for bed. Eventually, you turned off the lights and crawled under the warm covers, listening to the bustling city with excitement as you drifted off.

Something isn’t right. 

The red LEDs of your alarm clock read 4:41 am as you startled awake. It’s too cold. Slipping out of your bed, you grabbed your phone from the nightstand and unlocked it, opening the RFA chat. No one’s online.

[Guys, something’s off.]

You had just hit send when a voice rang out.

“A stranger has been located.”

Your heart leapt into your throat. Scared for your life, you frantically texted the chat, your thoughts as chaotic as your messages.

[SVENE]

[HLEP]

[ETHERES SOMETHING HRRIBLY WRONOG]

[SOEMONES HERW]

“Sensed location of stranger… adjusting target…”

[THE SYSDYEMS BEEN AC TIVATESD]

You desperately tried to phone Seven- anyone. No one was picking up. Your chest heaved. I can’t breathe. Panic spread like wildfire and you sprinted out of your room to try and escape the apartment-

Your heart stopped beating and your feet froze in fear. A shining, silver barrel was pointed straight at your heart.

It’s freezing.

“Don’t. Move. A muscle.” Whoever was behind responsible for breaking into your apartment, well, he clearly had a death wish. “What is that?!” 

“Backing up all information… After the back up is complete, the bomb will be activated. 20 seconds backup remaining.”

“What is going on?!” He screamed, lowering his gun for just a second. He had a weak point, in your range. You had to make a decision; would you let him steal not only the information but your life or would you save something?

…I can’t let him get his hands on that information.

“15 seconds backup remaining…”

You took your chance. Adrenaline rushed through you as you hit the gun out of his hand. “Wh- HEY!” You punched his side with all your strength. Then, bringing your knee up, you kicked him in the groin as hard as you could, sending him crumpling to the floor. “You bitch!”

No one will come.

“10 seconds backup remaining…”

You lunged for the abandoned gun, your fingers, slick with sweat, failing to pick it up. “Oh no, you don’t!” The intruder seized your ankle, pulling you down to the floor. You yelped in shock.

“Let me go!” I’m scared.

“5 seconds backup remaining…”

Your tears overflowed as he began to stand. With the remainder of your energy, you kicked him off you, finally picking up the gun. Pushing yourself off the floor, you rushed into your room, slamming the door behind you.

I can’t think straight.

“Backup complete. Relocating target.”

You fumbled with your phone, texting whoever you could. Your family, your friends, and of course, the RFA. Three simple words; usually said to fiances, parents or children. Never in your life would you have believed they’d be said in this circumstance - especially not by you.

“Bomb will detonate in T minus 5…”

Outside your room, you heard the robber curse. Your heartbeat crushed your chest and your tears streamed down your face.

The information is safe. Ĭ̶̗ ̴̢͌͂ä̶͖́m̷̠͒ ̶̜͠g̴̛̜̯̐̓ồ̷̱̽i̶̯̤̮͐n̵̬̝̑g̸̦̺̈̂͂ ̷̘͈̻̒̅̉t̴̛͔̖̣͆̆ọ̵͝ ̸̘̆̿d̴̺͗͜i̶̖͐e̶̬͇̦͑.

“4…”

Your lungs were on fire.

I’m sorry I couldn’t do more for you. E̵͈̒̃̾v̸͎̗̠̍̓̉e̵̡͖͗r̵͍̗̼͝͝y̷̜͓͍͗͌̒t̵̙̪͕͝h̸̥͆͜͝i̵͕̱͚͊̃͂n̸̜͈̥̏g̸̮͐̐̿'̸̛̰̖͎͌̽s̶̪̦̉̋ ̶̯̋̔ẉ̷̦͌r̷̦̜̉o̴̼̔̚n̸̝̒͌ǵ̴̖͇͌.

“3…”

Your head was light.

Please don’t blame yourselves.I̵͉̹̎̀ ̷͓̈́a̸̢͎͒m̴̭̋̏ ̷̤͕̾̓̅s̷͚͔͚̔ǫ̷̖͖̎͆̇ ̷̼̂â̷̘̜̝̎l̸̦̦͚̉o̸͔̒̅n̸͇̑̔̃e̴͚̒͋.

“2…”

You braced for impact.

I love you all. I̵̥͙̺̓̉t̶͓̣͒͠'̷̥͐̃͒s̷͙̺̉̂ ̵̩͔̀̌͋s̷̨̲̙̃o̵̧̗̗͛ ̵͒͜c̵͓̥̍ỏ̵͙͓̪͂̉l̸͎̖̱̾͝d̵̡͇̉.

“1…”

Thank you for everything. H̵͍̙͉͐e̴͉͖̔̔͂l̵̬̥̰͐̚p̴͔̣̓̎͆ ̶̨̍̐̈́m̶̙̤͕͊̍̋e̷̡̪̺͐̂.̸̱̟̈́̓

“Detonating.”

You screamed.

They didn’t learn about it until the morning. The whole country knew. Soon, the whole world.

The apartment building had exploded in a fiery haze, collapsing one half of the building into the inferno. It was attended by every fire station in the city. There were four dead, twelve injured and two in critical condition, at that moment. The source of the blast was floor fourteen. Your apartment. That’s what they knew. That’s what was reported by every news broadcaster in the city.

You were dead.

That’s what they knew.

Seven found out first. The alarms rang out during the countdowns. His fingers flew across the keys at a speed he didn’t know he could reach. It was too late. The continuous clicking came to an abrupt halt. He wasn’t fast enough. His heart pounded in his ears and he felt faint. His mouth was dry. He couldn’t think, he couldn’t move. He couldn’t breathe. Pain welled up in his throat and tears drenched his skin. Seven couldn’t do anything. He had made that bomb. He wasn’t skilled enough to turn it off. He couldn’t save you. He couldn’t save you. He couldn’t save you. He couldn’t save- he couldn’t- he- save- you…

V was there. Seven had called him as the first countdown began. V, in the area at the time, rushed there only to arrive and watch everything collapse. He watched the fire erupt from the rubble, felt the heat on his entire body. He suffered the shockwave in his chest. The blaze of failure rivalled that of the flames before him. His heart clenched. He had failed yet another person he held dear. V froze in front of the mayhem.

The police asked him many questions; Where was he before the explosion? Did he know how it happened? Did he know anyone in the building? Did he live there? Did he have anywhere to go, anyone to call? V let them check his emergency contacts. Jumin was called.

Jumin arrived on the scene not even twenty minutes later to pick up V. He stepped out of the car, emotionless. The police filled him in. There was no body to be found, however, earwitnesses had overheard a scuffle and shouting moments prior, indicating there was someone else in the apartment. That’s what they knew. Jumin couldn’t feel anything. He comforted V regardless of the growing ache in his chest. He stepped to the side to call Jaehee. He could only manage the address and the words: “It’s MC, come immediately.” In too much shock, Jumin only found himself hugging V tighter.

She pulled up very soon after. “Mr Han…” She didn’t even have to ask. The flames had subsided and were replaced by a heavy sorrow hung which in the air. The sun peaked over the buildings, covered substantially by smoke. Above that, the pink sky glittered with the last remaining stars. Jaehee glanced up. She didn’t know what came over her but she found herself scowling at the sky. You’d loved it. You’d loved the feeling of freedom it gave. You’d loved the colours, how they spread across the sky as though it was a canvas and the sun was the artist. Now it glimmered with a hope that she didn’t know if she would ever get to experience again. Jaehee shook her head and looked back down. She had to make you proud. She had so much work to do.

Zen overheard it only after he’d left his house. It was in shop TVs, the people in the park were whispering about it, even his fellow actors. People he passed gave him pitiful looks and he hated it. Zen couldn’t bear to log into the messenger. He didn’t want to know that he could’ve helped you; that he could’ve made sure you weren’t alone. He didn’t want to think about it. It was too quiet during his rehearsals. His director sent him home early. As he rode home, the wind tore at his jacket and tugged on his hair. It was too cold. Yoosung called him soon after he made it home, in hysterics. Zen agreed to meet up.

They met at Yoosung’s place. Zen knew Yoosung wouldn’t be able to go anywhere else. He was distraught. His tears stained through his shirt. His friends were telling the school that he wouldn’t be in. Yoosung felt so, so, so very alone. You two were close for the fleeting moments you knew each other. First Rika, now you? His heart couldn’t take it. His mind was racing. Was it him? Was he a bad-luck charm? Was it his fault? Why did you have to leave him? Why now? Why? Why?! His thoughts cluttered, his emotions in pandemonium. He could do nothing but cry and hold onto Zen. Yoosung didn’t want to be alone. You made him feel less lonely. 

You made them all feel cherished. Feel wanted, feel heard, feel loved. But you were gone.

That’s what they knew.

Whoo boy did i make myself sad or what

I promise I’ll write more. And I’m not just saying that this time. I promise.

anyway, hope this is what you want! Just tell me if you’re unsatisfied and ill rewrite!

bye bye! *poof*

[fiverrrwasright]

me: wanted to spend the day with people all day also me: now that all my roommates + my pal that now loves ‘em more than she loves me wHICH IM NOT CHILDISH OR BITTER ABOUT AT ALL are on the balcony right beside my room and i have not been invited i am going to fckn kill myself or cry in bed and watch a movie because taking the three seconds to pop over to the balcony and sit down with the people i know and live with is just too trying and i am unimportant and also i should probably die for my lack of significance 

thx u and goodnight

[castielsbeelove]

Daenerys Targaryen x Reader: My Queen

Request: Can u do a fic where reader and daenerys meet up at dragonstone like shes wih olena and has a crush on her and daenerys notices and flirts with her and it turns out to be smutty pls and thx xoxo

Warning: SMUT, cursing probably. Spoilers for new episodes!!!!!

Pairing: Daenerys Targaryen x Reader

A/N: Reader is Olenna’s grandchild and only heir to High Garden.

You looked up at the looming castle as Olenna Tyrell walked with you, sighing. “Couldn’t we get a damn carriage?” She muttered as she walked, hiking her black dress up.

“Would you like me to carry you?” A guard offered but they were cursed at. You didn’t pay much attention, your eyes were occupied by the dragons. One was flying above the ocean searching for food, another perched near the castle. The other one, well you didn’t know where that one was. All you knew was she had three.

When you saw her, you were stunned. She was gorgeous to say the least. Her hair, her eyes, her everything. You could barely speak when she talked to Olenna, and when she finally noticed you everything froze.

“And you are?” She asked, staring right at you. You stopped breathing and looked around, making sure she wasn’t looking at someone near you. “Yes, you.” She sounded amused.

“My name is (Y/N), your grace.” You stuttered from your seat beside Olenna.

“What a pretty name.” She said and turned to Olenna, talking to her about something. You didn’t hear what she was saying, your ears were ringing and your cheeks were red. She called your name pretty! It felt like such a great compliment from someone so utterly perfect. You closed your eyes as little pink flowers grew on your face and in your chest.

The next few weeks were hell. Olenna went back to get her army and ended up dying. Jamie Lannister had her drink poison.

“I am so sorry, (Y/N),” Daenerys said, holding your hand in hers. It was inappropriate for you to be in her room, especially without a guard and definitely not this late at night.

“As if I needed another reason to hate the Lannisters.” You laughed bitterly, looking out her window. “I don’t know what to do. She was my only family. Now I have nowhere to go.” You knew it was inevitable, Daenerys would eventually make you leave. “I don’t know what I’ll do.”

“I understand.” She said quietly, biting her lip. “Just know, you don’t have to leave here. Olenna is dead, but you are not. You’re as much of an ally as she was.”

“An ally? I don’t have an army. Our army has been killed off.” You sighed, looking down to her hands clasping yours. It was strange she hadn’t let go of them.

“That is correct, but you still stand for High Garden. You will get it back.” Daenerys looked into your eyes. You were too busy looking at her fingernails to notice how she was staring. “I promise.”

You shrugged and removed your hands to rub your face. “I just don’t know. I didn’t think this would happen. If I had gone back with her, I’d be dead too.” You realized how easily you could have died and felt a lump form in your throat. “Gods.”

Daenerys tilted your chin up so she could see your eyes. “Don’t cry. We will get justice for her death, (Y/N).”

You looked at her eyes, at her sky blue iris and smiled. “Thank you.” You genuinely believed her. You looked down to her lips and back into her eyes, your heart speeding up. ‘Don’t kiss the queen, you’ll die. She’ll have someone come kill you for that. That’s weird’. You told yourself and stood up. “I’m going to go to bed, your grace.”

“My name is Daenerys.” She teased and stood up, causing you to blush. “Goodnight, (Y/N).”

“Goodnight.” You smiled and left.

A few weeks later, Daenerys went off to battle. You were sick to your stomach with worry. It wasn’t the first battle she’d been in, but it was definitely the most intense. She took Drogon, her largest dragon, and her Dothraki warriors and left. She didn’t even say goodbye to you. For some reason, it hurt more than it should have? What if you never saw her again?

She came back exhausted and angry. You were in your room when she burst through the doors, an annoyed look on her face. Before you could even fully turn to face her she cupped your face in her hot hands and your lips collided. A gasp of surprise was sucked out of your throat as she kissed you.

“Daenerys!” You breathed when she parted from you, her hands still on your face. “Is everything alright?”

“Be quiet.” She snapped, one hand tangling itself in your hair while the other slipped down to the front of your shirt. You swallowed hard as she unlaced it, keeping full eye contact. “I will talk to you after.”

“After?” You were cut off by her lips on yours again. Soon she had your entire shirt unlaced and she slipped it off your shoulders. You inhaled sharply when she pushed you back on your bed. You fell backward, landing on your back. You pushed yourself up and she was on you, kissing every inch of skin she could find. You sighed, closing your eyes. Inside you were screaming, your dreams were coming true.

Her hands roamed down to your pants, tugging them off. Thank the gods you weren’t wearing some complicated dress. You hated dresses. Once she got them off she stood up, unclasping her cloak. She let it drop to the ground along with the heavy silver chain that held it in place, which clattered to the floor.

“Daenerys, wait!” You stopped her, pointing to your door. She left it open.

She snorted, looking back to you. “You presume I care if anyone sees me?” She asked in a sultry voice and you almost came right there. After a moment she smirked. “Alright, but only because you mentioned it.” She walked to the door and shut it, locking it while smiling at you to show she cared for your privacy. You smiled back and she unclasped her shoes, taking them off.

“Why must you wear so much clothing?” You mused as she walked back over to you.

“You take it off, then.” She said and turned around. You grinned and stood up, rushing over to her. You unbuttoned the back of her dress, helping her out of the complicated thing. Once it fell to the ground you almost fell with it. She turned around and you felt dizzy, she was so gorgeous. She smirked at you, seeing your eyes widen. “You can touch me, I won’t call my guards.” She whispered and something about the sentence made you incredibly wet. Your knees went weak and you stepped closer, licking your lips. Your fingers trailed along her soft skin lit by candlelight, sighing. She was beautiful, absolutely beautiful. You would die for this woman. You cupped her breasts, running your fingers over her nipples. She closed her eyes and you bit your lip. You’d been with a few women before but this was so different. She wasn’t just a woman, she was Daenerys Targaryen.

With a smile, she pushed you back onto the bed. You giggled and sat up as she crawled between your legs, kissing your knees and thighs. When those kisses reached between your legs you cried out, her tongue pleasing you to no end. “Yes!” You moaned and fell back, running your fingers through her hair. She continued her routine until you came, your hands fists in her hair. You groaned and bucked your hips as you orgasmed, cum leaking out from your cunt and onto the bed.

Daenerys sat up quickly after that and pinned you to the bed, straddling your waist. “I hope you can hold your breath long.” She warned before crawling over you, sitting on your face. You inhaled sharply through your nose at that, surprised by her boldness. You got to work though, licking and sucking until she came on your face. Her moans filled the air, beautiful moans that were more musical than any instrument you’d ever heard. You licked it all away and she got off you, panting. Her head hit your pillow and she sighed loudly, nuzzling into your sheets. “(Y/N), come here.” She sighed into your sheets and you happily obliged, crawling over to cuddle with her.

After a while she explained what happened, Drogon had gotten injured, Jon had touched her dragon, then left to go to the north. She planned on leaving soon to help him, she claimed she had a feeling he’d need it. It was all very hard for her, especially with Drogon.

“I’m so sorry.” You said as you brushed her hair with your fingers. “It’ll get better soon, I promise. Jon will convince Cersei, then you’ll have more time to plan. You will have the throne, my queen, I promise it. I’ll kill everyone I have to to see you on that throne.”

She turned and kissed you deeply, lovingly. “And you will be beside me, every step of the way.

“Yes, my queen. I swear to it.”

[mystic-messenger-writing]

Can you please do Yoosung reacting to MC being a teen mom? Thx in advance 😘

Alright so as you can see, I sort of veered off a little bit with this request so I’m sorry about that! Out of every character, I see Yoosung as being the best dad so I got a bit carried away with this one! So thank you for the request and I hope that you enjoy!! ^^

Yoosung smiled to himself as he finished moving his clothing in his closet to make space for your clothing

Even though the two of you had only been on a few dates together, the love that the two of you shared was strong and evident

When you told Yoosung that you didn’t have enough money to pay for your apartment rent and that the landlady was kicking you out, he immediately asked if you wanted to stay with him

He wanted to get to know you better and Yoosung thought that living together would help strengthen your already powerful bond together

Yoosung was snapped out of his thoughts when he heard a knock on his front door, he rushed over and skidded to a stop

“Hey MC, welcome to your new home! Here let me help you move-” Yoosung stopped mid sentence when he saw tiny hands clutching your thigh

A small face peaked out from behind your waist to reveal a child that resembled you, making Yoosung gasp in surprise

“Um, hello to you as well Yoosung. I uh want you to meet Minho… my, my son.” You finished your sentence without meeting Yoosung’s eyes which you knew were widened with shock

“Oh! Does his mean that he’s my daddy?” The little boy asked you with a curious look as he stared at Yoosung

Yoosung’s eyes almost bulged out of their sockets when he heard Minho speak, he knew that you were only nineteen and this little boy had to be at least three years old

Not wanting to pry while in front of your son, Yoosung bent down so that he was level with Minho and ruffled his hair saying “Well, I'm not your dad Minho but that doesn’t mean we can’t be friends! Come on inside, we can unpack yours and your mom’s stuff then go to a nearby park.”

Minho jumped for joy as you mouthed ‘thank you’ to Yoosung who nodded understandingly as he helped bring yours and your son’s luggage inside

Once the three of you were finished unpacking for the day, you, Yoosung, and Minho went to the park as promised, you and Yoosung sat on a bench while watching Minho play on the playground

“Do you want to talk about it MC?” Yoosung asked with concerned and understanding laced in his voice as he intertwined his fingers with yours

“Yes, you deserve to know Yoosung. I gave birth to Minho about three and a half years ago. The father, Minho’s father… isn’t a very nice person. Let’s just say, I was never planning on having children for a very long time but his father didn’t care. As soon as Minho’s father found out that I was pregnant, he left me, only leaving behind some nasty bruises on my skin. I promise you Yoosung that I love and trust you with my entire heart.” You said with sadness in your eyes

Yoosung could only nod, he couldn’t believe that someone would leave you and your unborn child behind, he never wanted to be a man like that

“I know saying this won’t help, but I’m so sorry MC. Even though I was a little surprised to see that you had a son. I mean I can never be a good enough father figure for Minho but the two of you can still live with me for as long as you need to. It’ll be like a permanent slumber party!” Yoosung said with a sad smile as you patted his shoulder

Just as you were about to give Yoosung words of encouragement, you heard the screams of your little boy, making you and Yoosung rush over to him

Minho was sitting on the grass with dribbles of blood on his arm and large tears steaming down his cheeks as you asked your son in a concerned and terrified voice what happened

“I-I saw a b-bunny and wanted to pet him b-but he w-wasn’t a very nice bunny and b-bit me mommy!” Minho wailed, he cried even louder when you tried to touch his arm

“This is bad MC. If Minho got bitten by a wild animal then it could very easily get infected. We need to take him back home now.” Yoosung said in a serious and steady voice

He carefully picked up Minho, who buried his face in Yoosung’s chest as he continued to cry his little heart out, and the three of you quickly went home

Yoosung grabbed some antibiotics and started disinfecting Minho’s wound, the little boy squeezing your hand and you tried calming the little boy down as he cried every time Yoosung tried to dab some of the medical solution onto his bite mark

“S-stop papa Yoosung i-it hurts!” Minho cried out yet again, Yoosung sighed and told you two to wait as he left and when he came back, he handed Minho one of Yoosung’s old stuffed teddy bears

“Here Minho, this is my old stuffed teddy bear and his name is Happy. Every time you hold onto him he’ll give you the strength you need to succeed in anything! So if you hug Happy then he’ll make sure that when I clean your wound, it won’t hurt!” Yoosung said as you nodded in agreement to your son

Minho nervously agreed and cuddled the teddy bear tightly to his chest and squeezed his eyes shut as Yoosung was finally able to properly disinfect your son’s wound and bandaged it up

“Wow, it worked! Happy really did help me! Thanks so much papa Yoosung for helping me, I love you!” Minho exclaimed as he have Yoosung a huge hug, you noticed the giant grins on both of their faces

Once making sure Minho’s wound was completely okay, you and Yoosung tucked him in bed as he tightly held onto his new teddy bear whispering “Goodnight mommy, goodnight papa Yoosung, and goodnight Happy! I love you all so much!”

Yoosung quietly shut the door to Minho’s room, he felt a warmth inside of him at your son's words as you hugged Yoosung’s waist

You kissed Yoosung’s cheek, saying “Maybe you should be a pediatrician instead of a veterinarian since you took such good care of Minho. But seriously, thank you Yoosung, for everything. For letting me live with you even though I didn’t tell you about my son, for understanding my situation, for helping Minho’s wound. I really can’t thank you enough for everything but I can always show you my gratitude if you want.“

Yoosung turned bright red but the two of you giggled as he gave you a sweet kiss but then his eyes widened and said “Oh! I should find some cookies recipes that me, you, and Minho can make for tomorrow night’s dessert!”

You softly laughed as you watched Yoosung scurry to the kitchen, you smiled to yourself thinking that Yoosung was wrong with his statement before, he would make an amazing father to Minho and eventually a loving husband

[smilexcaptainx]

Peter Parker Imagine

Requested: Anonymous

Imagine: can you write a peter parker imagine where you both have secret identities. and you’re peter’s girlfriend and so one night you had to leave in the middle of the night. (while ur sleeping with him) and so you sneak out and you go and fight but when you return, peter asked where you were. but you couldn’t tell him and he thinks you’re cheating on him. make the ending sad..? thx!

Warning: bad ending ->-

‘’Hey Y/N. Mind passing me the popcorn?’’ peter asks.

 You nod and grab the big bowl of popcorn, putting it in between you and Peter. He shoved his hand inside and got a big handful of popcorn, he than stuffed it all into his face, chewing loudly afterwards. You smile and roll your eyes at how adorable he looked when he stuffed his face like an animal. You were watching your favorite movie because you got hurt on your last mission and you needed something to lift your spirits. Peter didn’t know how you got hurt and you weren’t planning on telling him the truth.

 All you told him was that you fell off your bike and your scraped your arm. Of course, he didn’t really believe you at first because your scrape on your arm was more severe than a simple bike fall. But Peter just wanted to take care of you and give you what you wanted, and you wanted to watch a movie. It was practically midnight when the movie ended. Peter shut it off and let out a tired yawn stretching out his arms.

 He put his arm around you and smacked his lips together tiredly.

‘’You ready to go to sleep Y/N?’’ peter asks, looking over at you.

‘’Yeah.’’ you nod.

 Peter laid down and pretty much passed out right when he hit the pillow. You smiled and looked at him, he was so handsome, you never knew how you got so lucky. Before you kissed him goodnight, your watch you were wearing started to beep rapidly. Your eyes went wide and you throw your hand over your watch, hoping it would stop.

‘’Mmm. What was that Y/N?’’ peter moans, flipping over on the other side of his body.

‘’Oh! It was nothing dear. Just go back to sleep honey.’’ you smile, kissing him on the forehead, flipping your watch off.

 Peter smiled with satisfaction and went back to sleep. But he had his arms wrapped around you. You laid in his arms as he fell asleep. Normally you would love falling asleep in his arms, but the fact that your watch went off meant that there was a mission call. You glanced at Peter, hoping he wasn’t looking. You saw that he was fast asleep, so you brought your watch close to your face and turned it on quietly.

 You read on your watch what your mission was and you weren’t to happy to see what you had to do. You had to go off and fight some bad guys who were holding people hostage at a store. You were assigned this mission because you were the closet to where the store was. You didn’t want to wake Peter so you lied there for a few seconds, trying to think up a plan. Peter started to snore which gave you the signal he was fast asleep.

 Nothing could wake him up from the snoring stage, literally a fire could be happening and he wouldn’t even notice. You slowly get a pillow and gradually slide it where you were currently lying. You rolled off the bed nice and easy, hoping not to awaken him. When you hit the ground, you looked up at Peter who just took the pillow and squeezed it tight.

‘’You’re so soft Y/N.’’ peter groans, squeezing the pillow even tighter.

 You snickered a little bit, but your watch started to beep rapidly once again. You ran out of the room and raced out the house, going to the store who needed your help.

***

 When you finished fighting off the bad guys, you watched them get shoved into the police cars. The policemen thanked you once again for your heroic doing. You nodded and than went back to Peter’s house, hoping he was still asleep. As you arrived to his house, your heart skipped a beat as you saw that his lights were on. You knew that you were screwed. And to add onto the lecture you were probably going to receive, you got even more scars from the fight.

 You didn’t know what Peter would’ve reacted like, but you didn’t want to keep him waiting for much to longer. You just sucked it up and decided to just accept whatever was going to come to you. He probably was just going to ask where you were. On the way up to the door, you were thinking up some lies to tell him. You finally opened the door and he wasn’t there. You let out a sigh of relief and went to the kitchen, he was there either.

 You looked all the way around downstairs and he was nowhere, which pretty much meant that he was upstairs. As you tip-toed upstairs, you went to his room and opened it up ever so slightly. Peter was sitting on his bed with his phone in his hand and his face expression didn’t look to pleasant. You closed the door behind you and that caught Peter’s attention. His mouth dropped open as he saw you, but he looked pissed to see you, not happy.

‘’Y/N! Where the hell were you?!’’ peter screams, throwing his phone down on his bed.

‘’I was–’’

‘’ARE THOSE NEW SCARS?!’’ peter screams even louder, about to lose it.

 He stood up and started walking towards you, he spotted the scars that were on your face. The bad guys punched you and bruised up your face. You backed away as Peter came close to you.

‘’Y/N. Please, stop backing away from me. Let me see those.’’ peter says, making you stop.

 Peter observed your scars and shook his head. The questions that you predicted started to come out of his mouth.

‘’Where did you go? How did you get these scars? And why didn’t you say anything before leaving?’’ peter asks.

‘’Peter I–’’

‘’You’re cheating on me, aren’t you.’’ peter huffs, folding his arms.

 Your heart dropped and so did you mouth. You couldn’t believe the words that were coming out of his mouth. Your eyebrows lifted in surprise and you felt like throwing up.

‘’You thought that I cheated on you?!’’ you shout, throwing your hand on your chest looking like you were offended.

‘’Well why else would you keep sneaking out? You don’t think I notice you sneaking out everyday? I thought maybe you would’ve stopped by now, but apparently you haven’t. Tell me, who’s the guy?’’ peter asks.

‘’Fine…You want to know who the guy is?’’ you ask.

‘’Yes. I do.’’ peter folds his arm.

‘’NOBODY YOU IDIOT!!’’ you scream.

 Peter was about to say something back but you stormed out the door in total anger. You couldn’t believe that Peter would think so low of you. That you would sneak out just to be with another guy. He should know that you had his heart and nobody else’s. You were offended that he would think that of you. You two have been together for three months and he thinks you’re cheating, how stupid.

 You went to the kitchen to get some ice-cream. It usually helped you settle down from anger when you eat ice-cream. As you stuffed your face with ice-cream, you were on the edge of crying. You hear footsteps coming down the stairs, knowing that it was already Peter, you just picked up your ice-cream bowl and started heading towards the backyard.

‘’Y/N! Don’t leave! Y/N!!’’ peter calls out, chasing after you.

 You ignored him and went to the backyard, slamming the door shut behind you. You made it to the second step before the door swung back open. Peter rushed up to you and picked you up off the ground, making you screech in anger. You dropped your bowl of ice-cream and started smacking his hands, yelling at him to put you down.

‘’Not until you say you forgive me!’’ peter shouts.

‘’Fine! I forgive you! Now put me down!’’ you screech.

 Peter finally puts you down and looks at you. Worry and concern lit up inside of his eyes.

‘’Y/N. I’m sorry, okay? It’s just.. I don’t know why you’re leaving everyday and the fact that you aren’t telling me is killing me.’’ peter admits.

‘’Peter I..’’ you huffed and looked down.

‘’What is it Y/N? Whatever it is, I can handle it.’’ peter says, lifting your head up with his finger.

 Your bosses voice kept echoing through your head. He keeps telling you not to tell anybody. And if you did tell somebody, that person you told, would be killed. And you didn’t want to lose Peter.

‘’Peter.. I just.. I go out to eat everyday without you because sometimes I just need me time. I’m sorry that I’ve been hiding that from you, it’s just harder than it seems.’’ you lie.

‘’That’s all? You just went out to eat?’’ peter asks, his face looking like he didn’t believe you.

‘’Yes.. I.. I do.’’ you stutter.

‘’Y/N! You’re stuttering! I know for sure that you’re lying now! Just tell me the truth!’’ peter shouts.

‘’I AM!’’ you scream.

‘’I KNOW YOU’RE NOT!!’’ peter screams back.

‘’I CAN’T TELL YOU OKAY?!’’ you screamed, your voice cracking.

 Peter paused and stared at you like you just killed somebody. His eyes lowered to the ground in sadness. But he lifted them back up to look at you, his eyes were filled with anger. He was outraged.

‘’Why can’t you tell me? Hm?! I’ve told you everything!! And you can’t tell something as simple as why you keep leaving?! Look, I believe you’re not cheating on me but, why do you keep sneaking out?!’’ peter shouts.

‘’It’s complicated!’’ you shout.

‘’Fine! If our relationship is going to be build on lies, than I guess.. It’s over.’’ peter sighed in disappointment.

‘’Peter… Don’t do this..’’

‘’Y/N. We’re done. If you want me back, you better tell me the truth in five seconds.’’ peter says.

 You stared at him as he started to count down from five. He didn’t seem to happy as he reached two.

‘’One..’’ he sighed.

‘’Goodbye Y/N.’’ peter huffs.

‘’Peter, please–’’

‘’You should’ve told the truth than. I can’t have a girlfriend I can’t trust.’’ peter spat.

 Peter left you heartbroken. Whether you told him or not, you still lost Peter. And it hurt.

The End

-

Send me an imagine, and I will write it. x

-

I do not own this gif.

Credit goes to the owner.

[superteenwolftrash]

Lesson/Ethan Dolan Smut

Most of these are taken from my Wattpad account! (Twtrash01)

Send me requests for the following Fandoms: Teenwolf, Vampire Diaries, Dolantwins, OUAT(Peter Pan, Robbie Kay, Supernatural, Suicide Squad, The 100. Basically I’ll write for any fandom. I’ll write non-smut as well. Be specific in what you want! *I DON’T OWN ANY GIFS*

Request:  Hey! Could you make a Ethan Dolan smut where he sees you with your guy friend and he wants to "teach you a lesson" about seeing other guys 😝 Thx! -B

Request:  Hey! :) Can you please make a smutty Imagine about Ethan Dolan? I love your writings and i really love Ethan Dolan :) Greetings ^^ Sry if my english is too bad, i'm a german :D

"Hey I'll find you in a few minutes, alright?" I told Ethan, kissing his cheek before making my way through the crowd of people. Last minute Ethan and Grayson decided to come to playlist and since I was going to be there it worked out. I had a panel and meet and greet today and I ran into an old friend that I had known before my whole social media blew up and before I moved out to LA. He told me that he was going to be at the after party so we were gonna hang out for a bit. Of course I didn't think it was going to be a problem with Ethan since he seemed pretty occupied talking to fellow YouTubers. After a few minutes I finally found him, "Alex!" I said over the loud music, he smiled and hugged me tightly. We hadn't gotten to properly greet each other earlier since there were tons of fans coming from everywhere. Alex and I made our way to the lobby so we could properly catch up. I hadn't even realized how long had gone by until I see everybody pouring out of the banquet hall that the party was being held in. Then I saw Ethan come out of the doors, I could see his eyes searching the ocean of people. Then his eyes locked mine and my eye brows knitted together, he looked mad or something. "It's getting late." I stand up, "Here let's swap numbers?" Alex suggested with a smile and I nodded, taking his phone and putting my number in. He pulled me in for another hug, "It was really nice catching up with you!" I smiled, before telling him goodnight. At this point Ethan was no longer in sight, so I assumed he went up to our room that we were sharing. When I got up to our room I found Ethan sitting on the end of the bed waiting for me. "What happened to a few minutes?" He asked, a hint of anger in his voice. "Alex and I got to talking and I hadn't realized the time." I explained and he nodded. "You seemed like you were having such a good time with whatever the hell his name is." Ethan spat, now I understood he was jealous. "Yeah we had a really good time." I said with a smile and Ethan's eyes snapped to mine. He raised a brow at me "Did you now?" He asks,with an amused smirk on his face, his voice deeper than usual. "We did. I didn't realize how much I missed him." I say, trying to hide my smirk. Ethan stood from the bed and he walked towards me,  until my back hit the wall. "I guess I'm gonna have to remind you who you belong to." He rasped out, "And how are you gonna do that?" I whispered, "By teaching you a lesson." He said with a smirk, "Is that a threat?" I asked innocently, he scoffed "No." he started as he flipped me around so my chest was pressed against the cool wall. I gasped at the sudden movements, "It's a promise." He whispered in my ear, he finger tips trailed up the back of my thighs. His fingers gripped the material of my dress tightly as he pushed the material up my body. The dress was pushed up over my head and thrown to the floor, leaving me in just my bra and panties. I felt his hands trail down my back and down to my ass, leaving goosebumps in their wake. His hands gripped the flesh of my ass tightly, jiggling it in his hand before abruptly letting go and bringing his hand down on my cheek. A small surprised cry left my lips as the stinging became apparent. I could feel my core get wet immediately, well more wet than it already was. After another unexpected slap Ethan was pulling my panties down slowly, he groaned and I assume that's because he saw how wet I was. He quickly flipped me back around to face him, he propped his leg between my thighs holding my legs open as his slid his fingers across my lips. "And I hope for your sake that this is because of me." Ethan stated with hooded eyes, referring to the very obvious wetness between my legs. "You know it's only for you." I mumbled. Ethan started rubbing my clit agonizingly slow, I started grinding my hips forward but he quickly pulled his hand away. "Tsk tsk." He stated, shaking his wet fingers in front of me before bringing them to his lip. He moaned as he sucked them clean, "Ethan please!" I groaned, I hated when he teased me. "Alright alright." He said rolling his eyes, bring his fingers back to my clit. He rolled the little nub between his fingers, causing my legs to shake. "Maybe if you apologize I'll let you cum?" Ethan said with a smirk, "I'm sorry!" I quickly gasped out, Ethan pinched my clit bringing to close enough to the edge I was almost falling out. Ethan leaned in and pressed a soft kiss to the shell of my ear, "You know, that apology just didn't sound sincere." He chuckled, pulling his hand away just as I was about to cum. He stepped away, a smirk plastered on his face. My head fell back against the wall, a groan leaving my lips. "Learn your lesson?" He asked with a grin.

[dvddggs]

To the Four of Us (Part Twenty Three)

premise: modern AU chronicling the squad as they make their way through college and deal with general life things. soundtrack song: if anyone has a song rec for this chapter lemme know! full soundtrack: x  words: 3,131 (THERE U GO ITS NICE AND LONG YALL) warnings: kinda strong warning for this one!! ptsd, anxiety, alcoholism, death mention (if i missed anything please let me know!!) a/n: panic! at my chapter (thx @seas-space-and-stardust) all chapters: x tags: @heythereitsloey @anitheunicorn @newyorkyoucanbeanew @lafbagxette @justafangirlwithanavy @iamgrayfox @ordinaryornate @schuylerjoon @angelica-peggy-eliza @trashyperson101 @crazydragon15 @but-if-you-had-to-choose @geespilots @marvelous-hamilfan @5p00kygh05t @panda-powers @and-maria @lafeyettegunsandships @schokoobananaa @allthegoodurlshavebeentaken @aphboi @hell-yes-puns-and-ships @aham-threw-his-shot-away @hesitantcat @nonstopspook @hamrevolution @writethewayout @alexander-did-you-know @allthegoodurlshavebeentaken @sun-tree @angelizaandpeggy @isis278 @idk-destiel @engulfedinstars @hamiltrashuniverse @ahrupe @just-me-an-asshole @readfizz

dedication: everyone who’s messaged me that they’re refreshing their computers waiting for the update oMFG

It was a Wednesday. The house was quiet. It had been quiet for a long time. It would probably stay quiet for awhile longer. Alexander was sitting on the deck in his backyard, watching the sun rise. He could see his breath when he exhaled—it was freezing. But it was quiet.

He needed quiet.

Because it was a  Wednesday.

The sky lightened over the horizon, blossoming slowly from a deep, calming indigo to a bright and bubbly pink, welcoming the hope and happiness of a new day. But there was no hope. There was no happiness.

And yet the sun continued to rise.

Why?

Alexander sighed, gazing across the yard to his old swing set. He and his father had built it together. Fog danced across the snow which covered the ground in a thick blanket while his mind spun in relentless circles.

He wished the sun would just set again because, honestly, what was the point? It was a Wednesday. Soon enough, John would wake up and learn why Alexander had been up since five o’clock in the morning.

And then?

The world would come to an end.

His mind wandered back to the text from John’s brother. “Dad’s dead.” So blunt. So matter-of-fact. Clean. Done. Over.

Suddenly, a smiling face crossed his mind. It was nothing but a deep, embedded memory that would never be fully whole, but that would also never be fully gone.

His mother.

It was a Wednesday.

“Lex,” she said.

Sometimes the doctors tried to call him Lex but he wouldn’t let them—that name was reserved for his mother. Alexander looked up at her. She was grinning, showing her teeth. They were nice and white—he remembered that. Not too big, not too small. When she smiled, it could light up a room.

“Ready to eat?”

Alexander nodded and climbed onto the bed next to his mother. He was only seven, though she wasn’t much larger than him. She told him that it was because his father was a giant, so Alexander was part giant and he grew really fast. That was also why she said his father had left them—he had to go back and live with the other giants. The showers here were too small for him. Alexander had understood.

Twice a week, the nice nurses from Alexander’s hospital brought him to visit his mother. She told him that the nurses were real-life angels who were sent to make sure that they got to spend as much time together as they could. Every week, Alexander counted down until Wednesdays and Saturdays. Until he got to see his mother.

They ate lunch and watched TV and talked. Sometimes, on his mother’s better days, they would go on adventures. But that only happened twice. Only when the doctor said so.

Once in awhile, the doctor would interrupt their TV show to give Alexander’s mother a needle or ask her some questions. Alexander asked him a lot of questions in return. As time went on, the routine got longer and longer. They added tubes and lines dripping something into a needle on her hand and a machine that went beep, beep, beep…

When Alexander asked the doctor what these machines were, he told him that they were turning his mother into a robot. Then his mother would talk in a choppy, monotonous voice, and Alexander would laugh. He would forget the initial question. This was, of course, the goal.

One day—a Saturday—his nurses brought him to his mother extra early in the day. They even had to wake him up. When he walked into her room, her robot gear was gone. The tubes were gone. The needles were gone. Alexander gasped, grinning, and ran to her. She pulled him into a tight—albeit bony—hug and spoke softly.

“I love you.”

“I love you too, Mommy,” he responded happily. “Are you feeling better?”

Usually, when he hugged his mom he had to be extra careful so as not to displace the robot equipment. This time, however, it was all her.

“I sure am, Little Lexie.”

Alexander’s grin, if possible, widened. His mother tried to smile back, but her eyes did not seem happy. He tilted his head a bit but decided that it was probably nothing.

That day, they ate breakfast, lunch, and dinner together. They watched Alexander’s favourite cartoons, played I Spy, and talked until sunset. When Alexander’s nurses stopped by to pick him up, his mother began to cry.

“It’s okay, Mommy,” Alexander said. “I’ll be back on Wednesday! We can finish the show then, right?”

She sniffled, nodding, and let Alexander wipe a tear off her cheek.

“I love you, mama,” Alexander said, letting his mother squeeze him tighter than she ever had.

“I love you too, my precious boy. Just wait till Wednesday, okay? We’re going to have the best day ever! I love you more than anything else in the entire world, did you know that? You are my everything, Alexander. Goodnight, baby boy.”

“See you on Wednesday,” Alexander said as he left the room.

“See you then.”

It was a Wednesday. Alexander awoke bright and early and waited for his nurses to come get him. He squinted at the analog clock on the wall, trying to remember what his mother taught him about how to tell the time.

Little hand on the nine. Big hand on the twelve. Nine o’clock. They were late.

Alexander stood by the door with his backpack on his little shoulders. He’d packed his colouring books that day, excited to show his mother how he’d coloured in the most detailed picture.

Finally, when the big hand hit the two, his nurses showed up. Instantly, Alexander knew that something was wrong. They were not their usual bright and happy selves—their eyes were red and puffy and they looked unbearably sad.

“Alex,” said Nora, the taller of the two. “Do you want to sit down for a minute?”

“But I wanna go see my mama. I want to show her my colouring! Wanna see? Look—”

“Alex,” Nora said again. She was quieter this time—more serious. Alexander sat down and gazed between the two nurses, between his two angels. “Your mommy—”

What Nora told Alexander made his entire world come crashing down around him.

It was a Wednesday.

That was when Alexander usually shook his head free of thought and forced himself back into the present.

The present. A Wednesday. The sun had fully risen and the fog had lifted. He knew it was only a matter of minutes before his father, ever the early riser, got up and began to cook breakfast for the three of them.

The present. A moment of peaceful grief. For his mother. For John. A final quiet moment before heading back inside. Back to bed.

The present. His warm bed. John. Darkness. Quiet. A bit more sleep.

The present. Yawning. A lazy kiss on the cheek and a sleepy smile.

The present. “Good morning, Lex.”

The present. The end of the world.

“I’m feeling a bit better,” John remarked lazily, blinking his eyes awake and sitting up in bed.

Alexander nodded vaguely but didn’t respond. Nausea suddenly erupted in his stomach and he lost the ability to speak. How did he even begin? What could he possibly say?

It was the type of speechless that bound his entire body and left him without even the faintest idea of what to think. He was consumed by it.

John raised an eyebrow, laughing a little.

“Is something wrong? Is this about last night? I mean, I had a little meltdown but I’m good, see?” He pointed to his mouth, which he warped into a wide, happy grin. “Sleep fixes everything! Well…not everything, I guess. But it helps. Right, Lex? Lex?”

Alexander was staring at his lap the entire time John spoke, unable to look him in the eye. He couldn’t hide this—there was no way. And why should he? He wasn’t even supposed to know. What right did he have to withholding information?

“John,” Alexander whispered.

John’s smile transformed into a furrowed brow. He looked confused and increasingly concerned.  What could have possibly happened that made things worse between the end of his nightmare last night and now?

“I need you to listen to me, okay?” Alexander continued, swallowing hard. John nodded, his heart rate increasing rapidly. “Your brother texted you last night after you went back to sleep. Something—happened.”

Alexander took a deep breath, no idea how he was possibly going to get the words out.

“Alex…”

“It’s your dad, John—your dad…he died. Last night.”

Nothing.

Silence.

A minute.

Two minutes.

John was staring at nothing. His eyes glazed over and he looked at nothing. He felt nothing.

Inside, he was falling down a pit of darkness. Cold, alone, and broken. He hit the bottom then kept going. Kept falling. Nothing hurt though, he felt nothing. He was nothing. He was numb.

Empty. Hollow. He had nothing left. The world had taken from him—taken and taken and taken—until he had nothing left to give. And here he was, scraping the bottom of the pit, giving up the last thing that he could possibly give—his own father. 

Alexander didn’t dare to breathe. He didn’t move closer to John, he didn’t offer any comforting words. He studied John’s face. There was no sadness, no reaction.

“John…”

But he just shook his head vaguely.

“He’s dead.” John tested the words on his tongue. They sounded strange and foreign. Wrong.

Alexander said nothing.

“He’s dead,” John repeated, inhaling shakily.

Alexander’s eyes widened a bit.

“He’s dead.” A third time. “Okay.”

Internally, Alexander fought between past and present, the murky, unclear memory of his mother fighting for dominance over John. But no. No, he needed to be here. This was not about him. He fought the urge to submit to the comfort, to the warmth of his mother’s face. To where he usually retreated when he needed a break from the present.

“I’m so sorry,” Alexander whispered. He knew from experience that those words were empty, meaningless. But he didn’t know what else to say.

He understands? He knows what John’s going through?

But it wasn’t about him. He couldn’t make it about him.

John just nodded, staring into space. He made no attempt to move even after Alexander stood up.

“Do you want to call your brother?”

Another dazed nod.

Alexander unlocked John’s phone and dialled his brother’s phone number, handing the device to John as it rang. Through the pressing silence in the room, Alexander could hear James pick up the phone.

John said nothing, so James began to speak.

“John.”

No response.

“You got my text,” James continued. “I don’t even know what to say, John. I am so, so sorry.”

John nodded.

“Okay,” he said when he realized that James could not see him.

“They said there was some internal bleeding…that they didn’t catch in time. It was fast.”

“Okay.”

“John?”

No response.

“Can you come home?” James’ voice broke a bit on the last word.

John shifted his gaze into focus and looked at Alexander, who nodded. Somehow, they would find a way.

“Okay,” John repeated.

Alexander’s heart ached—John sounded like he had absolutely no substance left to him whatsoever.

“John,” James prompted. No response. “I’m really sorry.”

John paused, waiting for something more to be said. When it wasn’t, he hung up and handed his phone back to Alexander, though he wasn’t entirely sure why. His eyes glazed over once again as Alexander put a gentle hand on his shoulder.

“I need to go talk to my dad,” he said. “Do you want to come or stay here?”

“Stay.”

Alexander nodded, kissed John tenderly on the top of his head, and walked downstairs. When he left his room, he let himself feel again. He had to try and hold it together for John but, god, he didn’t realize how much it was hurting him to see his boyfriend in this much pain.

“Morning, Alex,” George said brightly when he heard the footsteps descending the stairs.

“Dad,” Alexander said. His voice was hoarse and his hands were still shaky. He told his father what had happened—everything from John’s nightmare to this morning with his phone call to James.

By the end, George had fallen into a chair and was staring at Alex.

“Oh my god,” he whispered, when his son finally stopped talking. “Is he okay? I mean—of course he’s not…but, you know what I mean.”

Alexander shook his head. “I think he’s in shock. He’s barely said two words since I told him.”

“Are you okay?”

“It’s not about me, Dad, it’s—”

George shook his head, cutting Alexander off.

“Answer the question. Are you okay?”

“Um, no…not really. I—I keep thinking about Mom. I know it’s really selfish of me and I’m trying to focus on John but—”

He was cut off again by his father pulling him into a tight hug. Alexander felt hot tears spill down his cheeks.

“Alex,” George said fiercely. “Of course you’re allowed to be thinking about your mom. This thing that’s happening to John right now—this terrible, horrific thing—the exact same thing happened to you. I’d be concerned if you weren’t thinking about her.”

Alexander nodded, wiping his eyes quickly.

“Thanks, Dad.”

George stood up and pushed back the sleeves on his shirt.

“Well, go and get your stuff,” George said.

“What do you mean?”

“We need to take John home, right?”

Alexander almost smiled.

Almost.

John sat on the bed while Alexander gathered their things—a pile of stray clothes which had accumulated in the corner of the room over the past few days.

It was strange—it seemed like Christmas had been a lifetime ago, though it had only been a few days earlier. How had so much happened since then? How did life get to this point? In the blink of an eye, how had the world as they’d known it changed?

As Alexander shoved his clothes into a duffel bag, he heard John’s voice from behind him.

“Laf,” he said, into his phone Alexander presumed. “My dad is dead.”

His voice, Alexander noticed, sounded no more emotional than it had this morning. It was as if saying it out loud helped him realize the truth of his words.

“Oh, great,” Alexander heard Lafayette say through the speaker. “What’d he do this time?”

Dead silence.

Alexander’s eyes widened as he whipped around to see John’s reaction to their friend’s misinterpretation of his words. His jaw dropped when John smiled, but he almost passed out from shock when he started laughing.

And once he started, he couldn’t stop.

John was cackling through the phone at Lafayette, who had no idea what was going on. Alexander was mildly afraid that John was having an actual full-blown mental breakdown. For almost five straight minutes, John laughed and laughed until tears began to stream down his face.

John’s laughter faded into a chuckle so that he could gasp for breath. In, out. In, out. Before he could inhale again, the tears of laughter turned into heaving uncontrollable sobs. His phone slipped from his hand and crashed to the ground, leaving a crack through the screen, but John didn’t react. He was crying harder than Alexander had ever seen anyone cry. He wretched and heaved, doubled over, absolutely stricken with grief. It was as though the realization of what had happened had finally come along and punched him in the gut.

Alexander dropped the sweater that was in his hand, picked up the phone, and wrapped John tightly in one of his arms.

“Shh…I know, John…it’s okay to cry…I know…” he murmured softly before pressing the phone to his ear. “Laf—John was being serious…his—his dad died last night.”

At Alexander’s words, John let out another loud sob into his shoulder. Alexander winced and pressed his cheek to the top of John’s head. With each sob, it felt like a knife slicing through Alexander, opening up the almost-healed wounds that had been inflicted upon him when his mom died. He wanted nothing more than to crawl into bed and stare at the ceiling and cry for twelve hours straight.

But he had to be strong for John. He had to keep him afloat. Right?

Lafayette hadn’t spoken except to whisper, “Oh my god. John, I’m so sorry.”

“Me and my dad are taking him home,” Alexander said quickly, his voice wavering. “I’ll update you.”

Without waiting for Lafayette to respond, Alexander hung up the phone and wrapped his other arm around John. He buried his face in his neck and took a deep breath, willing himself not to cry.

As he stroked John’s hair, brushing it down his back, behind his ears, off his forehead, Alexander let his mind wander to his mom. The dark corner of his mind that no one could access but him. He had not thought about her in a long time, so today was like an assault on the senses. He didn’t know if John realized how strongly he understood the feeling of absolute hopelessness that sat in the pit of his stomach, relentlessly punching him, beating him up, killing him.

John’s grip on Alexander’s neck tightened and that was when he lost it too. Alexander simply couldn’t hold himself together anymore—he didn’t have the fight. He let his emotions spill forward as he clung to John and let himself cry. He was quiet, not even sure if John knew he was crying, but listening to John’s pain verbalized was too much.

When Alexander ran out of tears to shed, he sat there holding John. He was numb—out of emotion. John’s gut-wrenching sobs had slowed to silent streams of tears. They held each other, not speaking. Not needing to speak.

They didn’t move until George knocked softly on the door and let himself in.

“Are you ready to go?” he asked softly.

John didn't respond, but Alexander nodded for the both of them. He stood up and pulled John to his feet. Though he wavered a bit, after a deep breath he was alright. They leaned on each other as they walked to the car and climbed in the backseat, John’s head resting on Alexander’s shoulder.

John fell asleep, the sun illuminating the fresh tears that were still wet on his cheeks. Alexander rubbed a thumb gently along his jawline.

“Dad,” he said quietly.

He saw George’s eyes shift to him in the rearview mirror.

“Hmm?” he replied.

“I don’t think I can go through this again.”

[briarthedragon]

yes to ask all 70 questions do i send 70 asks or can i just say all 70 questions? 1-70? :3c plz

omg yea thanks >.

01: Do you have a good relationship with your parents?Kinda? I love my parents and they love me, for sure. But they don’t really support my identity - they’re rly homophobic and transphobic to the point that I can’t come out as genderqueer safely. So kinda? Eh?

02: Who did you last say “I love you” to?Either my Zukes or my bestie Skye. I say “I love you” to p much all my friends every day so it’s hard to keep track, but I last talked to them xD

03: Do you regret anything?Oh yeah, I regret tons of things. I regret attending the university I went to, I regret not seeking help with my mental health issues earlier, I regret time wasted, I regret investing in toxic friendships. 

04: Are you insecure?Yeah, definitely. I doubt myself a lot, I fear that I’m annoying or bothering or hurting my friends, and I don’t really feel like I”m enough.

05: What is your relationship status?I’m in a QPR with my two wonderful zukes, @twixtandscream and @flowersalesman ! 

06: How do you want to die?Idk. I want to die after improving the world a little bit, that’s all I know. 07: What did you last eat?A bowl of cereal lol08: Played any sports?I played basketball as a kid, I ran cross country in middle school, and I did marching band in high school. 09: Do you bite your nails?Constantly. I accidentally gnawed down to one of my nail beds last night rip 10: When was your last physical fight?shit uhhhh idk? I come close to physical confrontation a lot but I don’t think I have been in a fight recently? 11: Do you like someone?I like a lot of people! lol. but romantically? yea i have,,,, some crushes................ im very gay it’s a problem 12: Have you ever stayed up 48 hours?Yyyyyep. I pulled a couple all-nighters at uni. One to finish a project for an art class, and the others to make sure my roommate was safe when she stayed up 13: Do you hate anyone at the moment?Yeah, I hate a lot of people. No one I know personally, but I hate a lot of nazis and also Donald Trump14: Do you miss someone?Yeah. Wish I didn’t, but it’s hard to get over things sometimes. 15: Have any pets?My family has a wonderful dog named Tumnus! He’s a gorgeous silken windhound. I also have an outdoor cat named Tib. 16: How exactly are you feeling at the moment?Pretty sick, and not too great, but I’m gonna try to make today good anyway 17: Ever made out in the bathroom?nah that’s nasty. so many germs,,, no one washes their hands. people shit in there 18: Are you scared of spiders?eh? i don’t like bugs and they make me feel creepy crawly stuff all over but I’ve been designated spider squisher at my apartments and stuff. and i like tarantulas 19: Would you go back in time if you were given the chance?eh, enough to fix mistakes i’ve made? totally. but way back in time? absolutely not. i dont need smallpox thx20: Where was the last place you snogged someone?uhh a few weeks ago? 21: What are your plans for this weekend?I’m meeting up with one of my zukes! :D 22: Do you want to have kids? How many?nnnnnnope. i’d be a terrible parent and also i just don’t wanna 23: Do you have piercings? How many?yea i have one set of ear piercings. i wanna get more ear piercings tho and maybe a nose piercing. idk 24: What is/are/were your best subject(s)?science, language, art, music25: Do you miss anyone from your past?yep. wish i didn’t. they don’t deserve it. 26: What are you craving right now?snugs 27: Have you ever broken someone’s heart?not that i know of? 28: Have you ever been cheated on?nah i haven’t been in a romantic or sexual relationship so 29: Have you made a boyfriend/girlfriend cry?i’ll apply this to my zukes and idk? have i? i mean maybe with headcanons or fics or something idk 30: What’s irritating you right now?my nose is all gunked up and there’s road work outside my house going constantly 31: Does somebody love you?i hope so 32: What is your favourite color?i like a lot of colors but i usually say pink and blue 33: Do you have trust issues?kinda? i trust my friends but i worry that they try to spare my feelings (these fears were Confirmed for some ppl who used to be very close friends so it’s,, bad.) 34: Who/what was your last dream about?uhhhh i don’t remember dreams that much but i def remember there was gay shit 35: Who was the last person you cried in front of?i cry a lot, it’s hard to say. 36: Do you give out second chances too easily?sometimes 37: Is it easier to forgive or forget?easier to forgive. i’ll forgive a lot but i don’t forget and i don’t always trust again 38: Is this year the best year of your life?idk. the first half was rly shitty 39: How old were you when you had your first kiss?20. it was only a few weeks ago tbh 40: Have you ever walked outside completely naked?nah 51: Favourite food?idk tbh. i like a lot of foods 52: Do you believe everything happens for a reason?yea, kinda? 53: What is the last thing you did before you went to bed last night?messaged my zukes goodnight 54: Is cheating ever okay?never. 55: Are you mean?when it’s deserved ;356: How many people have you fist fought?i punched a friend once jokingly, and i regret it and feel so bad even years later lmao. my next fist fight will probably be with a nazi or somethin 57: Do you believe in true love?yea, but not exactly in the traditional sense 58: Favourite weather?chilly cloudy days, rain, thunderstorms, snow 59: Do you like the snow?yea!! 60: Do you wanna get married?idk.61: Is it cute when a boy/girl calls you baby?no 62: What makes you happy?my friends, my fandoms, comedy, animals, nature, magic, art, the smell of books and holidays, making things, good food63: Would you change your name?i mean. i kinda have. legally? idk yet 64: Would it be hard to kiss the last person you kissed?nah dude i’d totally kiss her again if she wanted ;) 65: Your best friend of the opposite sex likes you, what do you do?uhhh i don’t rly look at ppl in terms of sex? but gender? ehhhhh i don’t rly have an opposite gender so it’s hard to say. sorry im too special snowflake sjw uwu 66: Do you have a friend of the opposite sex who you can act your complete self around?i’ll just go with “different gender” for this and yes 67: Who was the last person of the opposite sex you talked to?i’ll go with “different gender” again and say my mom, i was talking to her about work 68: Who’s the last person you had a deep conversation with?either Skye or my zukes again lol. most recent convo 69: Do you believe in soulmates?i believe in people you can spend forever with 70: Is there anyone you would die for? absolutely, but dying for people is easy. i’m trying my best to live for them until i have to