#god i rly gotta get my disordered eating in check

[agayconcept]

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[sizablelad]

just gotta vent for a moment. tw: eating disorders

god sometimes my doctor is so dumb about certain issues. he is surprisingly bad at dealing with people with mental health issues, which makes it so i’m kinda uncomfortable talking to him cause i have some mental shit, but it’s ok cause it’s mostly him being nervous and rambling on about shit.

ok, it’s been a year since i’ve seen him and i’ve come out in that time, so deadnaming was kinda expected, but it was riding the fine line of me being uncomfortable and not willing to talk to him anymore. but he corrected himself and moved on, and i’m used to it, so i didn’t let it bother me.

but this guy is sooooo bad at knowing how to deal with eating disorder patients an ppl who struggle with food. first of all, this was one of the main contributors to why i developed an ed. he told me at my last checkup something rly close to the lines of “ur taking after ur mother, but that’s ok”. i hadn’t ever rly considered that smth was NOT normal, but he was implying that. he was also comparing my weight to my mother’s, and that was incredibly rude on my moms part, implying that she was overweight (whether it’s true or not doesn’t matter) and we were comparable as a full grown adult and a fucking 13 yo child.

so that was last year. as my mental health worsened, i saw him for several non- check- up appt., one of which is that “this is rly common, my sister in law has anorexia, i care abt u so stop doing this (in abt 15 ways— this guy also doesn’t know when to shut his fuckin mouth) see u in a month to check on ur weight”. he also consistently talked about my physical appearance of being unhealthy and underweight. i didn’t see him again abt the issue. up until my check up a few days ago.

then at my check up, he literally made the worst mistake a doc talking to someone with an ed can make. he commented on my physical appearance. not an “ok, u have no jaundice, ur stomach isn’t constipated, ur eyes aren’t dilated” not a checklist that literally every doc HAS to go through. he said “u look good. seriously. u look good, robust, very healthy”. like WTF. i get that a doc that deals with physical health has to CHECK ur physical health, but they DONT have to make an objective comment about a what could be a completely inaccurate flash judgement (what “healthy” was he comparing me too? what if i was, in fact, not physically healthy at all cause i’d been eating only donuts but maintained a proper weight?). every single doc i’ve met with except him has never made a comment abt this, even if they didn’t know abt my struggles with food, especially if they knew abt my struggles with food.

as a side note, he also made odd comments abt my transition, talking extensively abt his gay son (wtf do i care abt ur gay son, at this point the 15 min appt has turned into 45 min cause of ur rambling dude).

this may seem like a small issue, but it’s a trigger for MANY ppl both in the trans community and ppl with eds, and is literally the biggest no-no on the list of no-nos. he has no idea what that could have done for my mental, and as a result, physical health.

in summary, avoiding saying literally one of the worst things u could have said is not that hard. ppl get sooooo angry abt only skinny ppl in the media and only rly fit celebrities that they ignore the everyday, off hand comments they make that could possibly have a much bigger effect than some skinny model in a magazine that i never look at. he should pick up some tips from his anorexic sister in law on how to treat mental health.