#god i rewound through that ep so much

[bronx-bomber87]

Holy hell. My heart is still racing from that finale. I thought last ep got my adrenaline pumping sweet lord. I must’ve rewound that hug like 4 times before I could move on. Lucy not breaking until she is in the comfort of their place(let’s be honest theirs at this point) and Tim being right there to pick up the pieces. It was so intimate and sweet. Her getting the solace she needs from him. Her instant comfort zone. His automatic reaction to hold her. The sweet kiss on her head while he consoled her. Beautiful. Also that song that was playing. Whoever picks the music. Give that person a raise got me in the feels hard.

Their little banter with him going with her was primo. Oh Lucy he knows you can protect yourself. He just loves you and that’s why he’s there. She recognizes this and her reply is perfection ‘ Glad it’s you that has my six’ ‘Me too’ these two ❤️ I just love them so much.

Can I say what a complete BAMF we have as a couple? That whole action sequence was incredible. The way they worked out a plan on the fly and trusted one another. How in sync they were as they executed it. You wanna see poetry in motion? my god that scene. How well they work together is so fun to watch. The way he scooped her up minute Nolan arrived? *chefs kiss* Also how he kept a hand on her thigh while they caught their breath. So good.

Been a hell of a season everyone. I’ve loved it from beginning to end. Truly was Chenford season. Watching how these two grew this season by leaps and bounds was amazing to behold. Both together and separately. Eric and Melissa were lightning in a bottle magic. Couldn’t be happier with this entire season and to see what the future brings for them. S6 can not come fast enough. I’m already going through withdrawals LOL

[brakebillskids]

ok so i was in the main tag and saw that 1000heartbeats [x] had noticed jason had cut his hair super short during the 2019 sag awards

which is indeed noteworthy because usually after filming he does cut it but still leaves alot of length on it, presumably for returning to filming around july

critics choice awards 2018 [coming from 2017]

a bun for most of 2016-2017

and i remembered something and have been working on a theory/hypothesis w/e since dinner [long read ahead]

back in jan 2016 a few weeks before the show officially premiered on syfy, [they had the first episode up online in like dec of 2015] they said they already had 6 seasons worth of material [x] its highly unlikely that even with divergences from the book timeline, someone like q wouldnt die and be gone from the show permanently. but if so, it would presumably make most sense to save that until the end of the roughly outlined 6 seasons

but we now know that at the end of filming season 3 in 2017 [x] jason and team got together to discuss his leaving after season 4. which means that the road map for season 4 and beyond had essentially been smashed, and the bits and pieces had to now be reworked into not only resolving the monster plot line, but have a plot line emerge that would lead to Qs permanent death, which in this timeline meant a trip on the underworld metro, a one way trip

there may have been earlier hints i cant remember but we get the biggest ones in season 4 episode 7 The Side Effect

pennys conversations with derek cover things like:

characters who may seem less significant than others may not be

anyone can be the center of a story, even a todd

we think we will know what will happen with a white male character at the center because of white male protagonism

the most important characters arent who you expect

just because you see things nobody else sees doesnt mean theyre not there

being dead gives you new perspectives

we [dead librarians -> the writers, who ‘see the bigger picture’] know things that will happen that the living [the audience] would give anything to stop [like a major character being permanently killed off the show]

its our [the writers] job to appreciate their full life

see but dont intervene

the pages of ‘margos story’ wasnt about margo, it was about fen

stop with the misogyny

alice had changed the ending to her revised book [”alice wasnt where her book said she would be”-zelda] [foreshadowing re:reworking the shows story]

zeldas dead daughter, harriet isnt really dead

no spoilers followed by asking for spoilers [”i thought you didnt like spoilers”-penny ->writers]

margo and josh, together? basically will be later yes confirmed

cis het frat bro bias

zelda will change the library, fen/fillory, and kady/all magic

responsibility [writers] to tell the world what/who to value

never asked how derek, a cis het frat bro, died [foreshadowing]

the past is full of white male protagonism [the future will change that via the show]

white guy gives penny, a poc, the test, because ladies [writers] upstairs love a twist [foreshadowing]

penny will collect secrets

penny greets someone he knows into the underworld

we essentially got a smack in the face mid season by the writers telling us Q is gonna die so get ready for it

and i feel like most of us couldnt believe it and went into denial because what? they couldnt do that! get rid of Q somehow? permanently? our center of the story? our white male protagonist? no. not possible. i know i sure as hell did

and to hammer things in even more, we also get a subplot of fen [which actually turns into a main plot line re:the first penny point] and the future and predicting it and things being foreshadowed [her dreams] coming true, re: what penny says

so thats why this season felt odd and ended how it did. whatever plan they had to start with had to be changed into something to attempt to satisfy the monster plot while having Q permanently die [except for the possibility of flash backs apparently]

ok time for bed see yall in the morning

[icyxmischief]

Loki Ep 1 Pt 1

Here comes the blow-by-blow initial review: 

--Wise to start at the point where AA!Loki (our new current Loki) stole the Tesseract and skipped out of Endgame (also incidentally the point at which I, gratefully, stopped watching Endgame, L O L ).  

--I was at first a bit cautious about the rhetorical device of making Loki more “relatable” at the expense of his ferocity, mystery, and elegance, but I’ve decided that doing so allows a kind of “behind the scenes” glimpse at the character as a living breathing person who lures the audience into sympathy with him, by granting us the “privileged” view of the bumps along the ride that he has to deal with in order to cultivate that enigmatic persona. It makes us feel like his buddies as we watch the film. I was worried this would make the film too much like Ragnarok, with its manically anarchic humor that has its place but is ill-suited to the Thor franchise.  Instead, it’s just enough of a dose of irreverence to afford us candor from the master of deceit.  When he rips off the collar/mask and spits out sand in the Mongolian desert, that one simple detail sets the stage wonderfully for that new angle at the character. It’s such a small narrative device, but it makes all the difference. 

--The need to stand on the only higher point in the desert to tell the Mongols his “glorious purpose” catch-phrase was pretty fucking hilarious. My darling, your need to grandstand and overcompensate for being invisible all your life is in rather endearing evidence <3   “Never mind,” lol.  His diplomacy skills are highly IC. 

--Tiny nitpick: if he speaks Alltongue, which he does, he would have understood the Mongolian woman and spoken in her language already. 

--Referring to Loki as a “Variant��� is a wonderful bit of meta built into the show.  Beyond the literal interpretation as a person who causes variations on the “Sacred Timeline,” Loki is anything but a conformist in any regard, and wears that V proudly. 

--”I think I’ve had my fill of idiots in armored suits telling me what to do” lmfaooooooooo. Golden.   “This is your last chance, now get out of my way,” god Tom hasn’t forgotten how to make Loki’s voice go from warm and pleasant to venomous and smoky.  

--He learns so fast and is so resourceful.  The timeline is being reset and he’s immediately watching with steel-trap focus to learn his new adversary.  After exhaustion and psychological torture, after a face-off on Stark Tower with his brother that compelled him to weep, Loki is still that sharp minded and that’s admirable as fuck. 

--I know people are gonna take issue with the number of times he got himself and the collar on his neck “rewound” by the agents, used as a gag, but I actually find this joke at his expense permissible: it showcases his sympathetic and admirable trait of being extremely obstinate and determined, of surviving.  THAT SAID, these agents had better not be mere humans if they can strongarm a Jotun physically without breaking a sweat (I’ve read that they almost certainly are genetic clones/mutations bred specifically for work at the TVA, so that tracks). 

--The TVA’s....mid-sixties corporate office space mundanity? Is a hilarious technique that strikes me as very Terry Pratchett, which is always a good thing. 

--NOT a fan of the stripping him naked thing when he’s spent his whole damn life having his agency violated in one way or another, and recently quite literally and violently, but every “villain” growth story unfortunately requires being knocked down a few pegs.  Some have also posited that this is also a metaphysical “stripping” of Loki’s entire identity to date, allowing him to move forward and heal via the trials of working for these people. I hope so.   Trying not to make a Big Deal out of the way that he stammers when he says “now, now hang on j-just a minute,” before he is dropped through the trap door. 

--Hoping we deal a little more comprehensively with the SEVERE C-PTSD Loki has contracted from his time with Thanos. For Loki and Loki’s psyche, this starts mere hours after the siege of New York in 2012.

[chalkrevelations]

Well. Episode 34 of Word of Honor, and, oh.

(Spoilers. Scroll on by and come back later if you want to watch it unspoiled.)

Oh. No. NO, show. Only A-Xiang is supposed to make me cry, so fuck you, Zhou Zishu, with your SAD LITTLE FACE, oh my god, why don’t you just pull my heart out of my chest, throw it down in the dirt and stomp on it? It would be kinder than having to watch you deal with the implications of whatever it is, precisely, you’ve done to yourself that means you’re expecting to drop dead any day and lose your chance at lifetime happiness with your soulmate but are hiding from everyone. (Well, I guess it’s your turn to be hiding something, because it looks like everyone in the jianghu except you was in on at least some part of Wen Kexing’s plan.)

So, the first thing that struck me in this ep is the way ZZS sits at the table at the post-Hero’s Conference meal drinking session, hunched over, like his bones are made of shattered glass, and here’s the thing: He’s absolutely just had a serious emotional blow. But also, this is a guy who’s terminally ill and in chronic pain, and we saw that repeatedly for about the first two-thirds of the show, and then the emphasis on it kind of slacked off. And I’m thinking now that maybe it wasn’t just slack writing or WKX playing his xiao in the rain through the nights at Four Seasons Manor like the worst emo kid ever that helped, that maybe some of the progression of the deadening of ZZS’s senses might have offered him some relief, but whatever it was, I’m wondering if whatever he’s done now – I presume pulled out those gd Nails - has exacerbated everything all over again. I cannot believe that at least Wu Xi can’t look at the way he’s moving and holding himself at the table and see that he’s not just stone-cold angry and emotionally hurt about being left out of the loop, he’s in physical pain. Don’t get me wrong, I think it’s a little like being stabbed in the chest when he gets confirmation that Chengling and WKX were in on WKX’s “death” together while he was in the dark and believed this asshole actually died on him. But I also think we’re getting physical pain ramped up again from him; there’s a hesitation and delicacy of movement that speaks of someone who’s judging their movements and maintaining a high level of control, because if they do make a wrong move, everything could just explode into agony. I also noticed the way he clutches his cup when A-Xiang starts explaining how WKX made a deal with Xie Wang in order to rescue ZZS from Tian Chuang, and I can’t for the life of me figure out if it’s having to hear about WKX finding himself in that position in order to save him, or if it’s A-Xiang calling him “Sick Dude” at a moment when that’s going to press right on one of the tenderest, most vulnerable places. Because, god, everyone else at this table who even knows about his terminal illness still thinks that Wu Xi is going to be able to fix him. And here’s where ZZS apparently is a better person than me, because I don’t know that I wouldn’t have an absolute breakdown and end up throwing it in WKX’s face that if he had just told me what was going on, maybe I wouldn’t be about to drop dead tomorrow and leave him alone for the rest of his life, asshole. But no! His zhiji’s happiness is so important to ZZS, that he’s not going to say a word about it! It’s more important than his own life, that his shidi has been able to avenge his parents while keeping his own hands (relatively) clean of any more sins. He’s going to continue to be there, to be whatever WKX needs him to be, for however few days he has left. I won’t fail you. (Even when you fail me). Here’s the thing though – at some point, you’re going to drop dead, Zhou Zishu. And apparently you’re going to leave WKX completely unprepared for it, so I don’t know that you’re doing him any favors being the one who’s hiding something, this time around. And oh my god, I just realized something – you made him drink three pots of liquor as a punishment – was that to get him so blind drunk he wouldn’t notice the Nails were gone? You realize you have to tell him at some point, right?

ANYWAY, WKX gets sloppy drunk and stumbles into their(? has everyone just given up any pretense at this point?) bedroom, and first of all, can I take a minute to flail over the way ZZS pushes drunk WKX’s hair back off of his shoulder? Can I? Because I rewound and re-watched that 2 seconds of the show three times. But then, then, WKX starts drunken rambling about how happy he is, and how scared he’d been that he wasn’t worthy of ZZS, and tears start welling up in ZZS’s stupid eyes, and WKX starts talking about how finding ZZS made him a whole new person, and ZZS’s stupid precious face gets SO SAD, and I start fucking welling up too, and then WKX talks about his parents and their shifu, and ZZS presses WKX’s head to his chest and gives us his stupid sad little smile, and I’m literally clutching my shirt hem in inarticulate pain and distress by this point, and then ZZS starts to break down as he holds WKX’s hand as WKX finally falls asleep, and he gives that stupid shaky sobbing little gasp, and just UGH. I’m DYING here, show. Also, how did you manage to do this to me with just your face, Zhang Zhehan? I’m not sure I can take the next couple of episodes, when the whole Nails dilemma is sure to come out.

Second big takeaway of this ep is that I just … oh my god. I cannot with you, Xie’er, holy shit. And I say this in a completely loving yet utterly aghast way. Was it absolutely necessary to literally sit on Awful Yifu’s lap? I’m reduced to a state of horrified laughter over the envelope pushing. The absolute fuckery of the power dynamic fluctuations of the Zhao Jing/Xie Wang relationship at this point … it’s something. It’s finally reached a point where it’s so fucky and complex that I may have to go looking for some fic, despite my general desire to punt Awful Yifu into the sun. I do have to say that the whole (one-sided) conversation when Xie’er finally let everything out was super-cathartic. Go off with your unfilial self, Xie’er. Li Daikun has been amazing all through this, and he’s continuing to maintain a perfect balance as we move toward the finish line. I’ve heard he was offered Wen Kexing and supposedly didn’t want to take the role because he didn’t think he was ready for it? And while I absolutely appreciate Gong Jun and the chemistry between ZZS and WKX that he built with Zhang Zhehan, I’m flabbergasted that Li Daikun was able to pull off Xie’er like this, yet thought he couldn’t manage WKX ... and I have to admit, I kind of would like to see what WKX would have been in his hands. I’ve also heard a rumor that they’re talking about maybe filming an origin story for Xie Wang? I … am torn, because on the one hand, more Xie’er, but on the other, more Awful Yifu. Anyway, I think we’re continuing to see a whole tangle of resonances between Xie’er, Wen Kexing, and Zhou Zishu, and the awful men in their lives who helped make them who they are today; there’s something of a contrast between Zhou Zishu, who, maybe significantly, was older and had some grounding from his Four Seasons shifu when he got tangled up with Prince Jin and Tian Chuang and who was willing to gnaw off his own leg to get out of the trap (and only finally struck back because he was forcibly taken back) and the other two, one of whom killed and … dismembered? flayed? his abuser before taking his literal throne, and the other of whom turned his abuser into a muted … piece of furniture? sex toy? before taking his figurative throne. Xie’er is about five steps behind Wen Kexing on a parallel path, and maybe there’s still time for him to untangle some of the fuckery in his head about his awful yifu. But meanwhile, there it is: You failed me. Xie’er, you’re breaking my heart, but I feel like I have to point out, again, this is the guy who is literally responsible for the existence of the Department of the Unfaithful. I did have a brief moment when I was convinced Xie’er was poisoning himself and Awful Yifu in a murder-suicide move, but then we got lap-sitting instead? Which could have made me think we were getting some kind of reversion to wanting to feel safe, like a kid able to (finally) sit in his father’s lap and play at comfort, but then he went and made it – let’s be honest – a little weird.

Last really big takeaway for me from this ep is that A-Xiang and I continue to be simpatico, because lady, I also have a very very bad feeling about Fan Shishu’s absence in this wedding “party” from the Gentle Wind Sword Sect, and watching your dawning realization at the end of the episode when he doesn’t show up and doesn’t show up and doesn’t show up as the group enters only confirmed my suspicions that something is UP. Am I supposed to expect a fakeout to Mo Huaiyang’s haranguing speech to Cao Weining, with a wrap-up of “But since you clearly love her so much and want to be a good influence …” Because I won’t believe it. And I’m not going to be happy or comfortable until we see the back of this asshole, because speaking of somebody who says everything with his face, Mo Huaiyang was NOT happy when Ye Baiyi called off the rest of the Heroes Conference, after his horse in the race had already been completely repudiated and he lost whatever chance he had at gaining power and influence on Zhao Jing’s back. Even if he did come all this way – bearing gifts – just to tell Cao Weining he’s an ungrateful brat and to never darken the door of Gentle Wind Sword Sect, it would still be a jerkass thing to do. But I don’t trust him as far as I could spit, and my only question at this point is whether all of Cao Weining’s shidi who came with him to the wedding are in on whatever bs Mo Huaiyang’s planning to pull.

A couple other random things:

Oh, so A-Xiang’s two moms are going to stay together for the rest of their lives, are they? And Liu Qianqiao is even like, “Loser Boyfriend? I don’t know him.” Followed by a cut to Luo Fumeng and her vaguely smug reaction. I’m dying.

No one’s going to say anything about this random body that Wen Kexing used for his plan? Just, you know, went to the store or something and picked out a random body? I realize it’s very late in the game to be getting moralistic about the adorable merciless killers, but come on, man. I also think we have once again overused the infodump. I realize we only have 35 episodes, but some of this explanation of WKX’s very complex plan should have been shown, not told. Anyway, cue series of flashbacks to finally explain how the whole Rube Goldberg plan was put in place, and ah-hah! WKX, himself, talked to Chengling ahead of time. I notice that in that flashback scene and the one when he talks to Ye Baiyi, he’s prominently still wearing That Hairpin, so we’ll realize this all got set into motion before ZZS was rescued and brought home.

Finally, why has everyone seem to have forgotten (still) about that KEY that WKX was waving around? No one’s going to mention it? Really?

And now, I think I’m going to fortify myself with some bourbon for the next ep.

[trensu]

Episode 23: the One where JYL Captains the Ship

Alrighty, so battle stuff is happening

Nothing major going on 

EXCEPT wen ruohan leaves his evil lair to confront wwx about how he took control of his puppets!

Wrh: where did you get the Plot Device?? Did xy give it to you?? HOW ARE YOU MAKING IT WORK??

Basically just Angry Ranting that Bad Guys do

Wwx mouths off, as usual

Lwj’s eyes are glued on him this entire time bc when isn’t staring at wwx?

(I understand lwj, I too cannot tear my eyes away from wwx when he's onscreen, that beauty mark just under his lower lip is so goddamn distracting...)

Wwx: hey, wrh, i just finished making his nifty thing and haven’t shown anyone yet, wanna see it?

And tah dah! We now have Plot Device 2 (aka stygian tiger seal/amulet whatever)

Pay attention to Plot Device 2, guys, it’s gonna cause us some angsty wangxiantics in the future (BRACE YOURSELVES)

Pausing here to point out how freaking cool wwx looks, levitating the pieces of Plot Device 2

OH NO, WEN RUOHAN IS NOW CHOKING WWX

THAT’S NOT ALLOWED!!

STOP HURTING MY SUNSHINE BOY

And wwx is smirking in victory?? What the heck wwx

Oh, it’s bc since wrh and wwx are wrapped up in their confrontation, there’s no one controlling the puppets so the puppets all collapse. That was part of his plan, maybe?? Idk, doesn’t matter

What matters is that this frees up LWJ to fly to wwx’s side

WHICH MEANS THAT LWJ IS THERE TO CATCH WWX ONCE WRH DROPS HIM!!

Lwj: Wei Ying! *catches his soulmate*

Wwx: *passes out in the arms of his very dashing soulmate*

Lwj barely even acknowledges that Meng Yao kills Wen Ruohan bc who cares about the big bad villain getting killed whEN YOUR SOULMATE IS PASSED OUT IN YOUR ARMS??

Lwj: Wei Ying

He says again! As his eyes stay glued onto wwx’s beautiful unconscious face. HE HOLDS HIM SO CLOSE

I mean, he could totally hold him CLOSER but that would be too much for the censors maybe??

Ppl are cheering. I was cheering. I don’t think we were cheering for the same reasons.

I was cheering bc lwj was ~tenderly cradling~ our beautiful sunshine boy

I think the other ppl were cheering bc the bad guy died? Weird.

LOL, DEJA VU MOMENT HERE

Lxc is cradling an unconscious Nmj

I guess the lan bros ARE pretty similar lolol

Boring stuff. Plot stuff. OMG I DON’T CARE WHAT YOU HAVE TO SAY MENG YAO, SHUT UP.

Ahhhh, this next scene!

WWX is waking up in a bed and jyl is at the bedside.

Jyl starts bringing out the wangxian pie~! Maybe i should start using soup metaphors since Soup is her Thing…

Jyl is so happy that wwx is awake now!!

Jyl: you’ve been asleep for three (3) days!

Wwx: THREE DAYS??? What about jc and lwj??

HE IMMEDIATELY ASKS ABOUT THE TWO MOST IMPORTANT GUYS IN HIS LIFE, I LOVE MY SUNSHINE BOY.

Jyl: both jc and lwj have been very worried about you! 

We find out that even sect leader jin has been visiting which is disgusting, so we’re ignoring it

Oh, jyl is trying to get wwx to stop moving around so much

Jyl: LWJ says you need to rest more. He says you used too much spiritual energy

LWJ HAS BEEN KEEPING TRACK OF HIM THIS WHOLE TIME

JYL TRUSTS HIM TO TAKE CARE OF HER LITTLE BROTHER!!!

Jyl: also don’t use Plot Device 2 all willy-nilly. LWJ says it’ll hurt you!!

Wwx: LWJ, LWJ, why do you keep talking about him? He’s so boring and he doesn’t talk enough!

BUT HE SAYS THIS WITH A CUTE LITTLE FOND SMILE

BC THINKING ABOUT LWJ MAKES HIM HAPPY

BOYYYYY

YOUR CRUSH CAN BE SEEN FROM PRESENT-DAY NON-FANTASY CHINA (but, uh, discreetly, bc of censorship)

Jyl: while you were comatose, lwj came by every morning and evening to play his guqin for you. To relax your mind and spirit

Jyl: you probably wouldn’t have woken up so soon if he hadn’t done that

AHHHHHHH THIS NEXT SCENE!!!!!

JYL IS JUST SPOONFEEDING US WANGXIAN PIE NOW

SHE’S GIVING US A BIG OL’ HELPING OF WANGXIAN PIE HERE!! WHICH IS GREAT BC I AM STARVING

Here comes lwj, with his guqin strapped to his back!

Lwj actually brings himself to knock on the door this time

SEE, THAT WASN’T SO HARD, WAS IT LWJ?? WHY COULDN’T YOU DO THAT BEFORE??

Jyl: oh, that must be lwj~!

ohhh, wwx's face when she says this! He looks all nervous and flustered

bc he has a ~gentleman caller~ and he’s not decent!!! 

HE’S ONLY IN HIS ENTICING RED UNDER-ROBES!! IN BED!! AND LWJ IS VISITING!!

Okay, that’s probably not why BUT IN MY HEART THAT’S TOTALLY WHY

So jyl goes and answers the door

Lwj bows so respectfully to her (he knows she’s wwx’s precious person!!)

LOL, I LOVE HOW JYL DOESN’T MENTION THAT WWX IS AWAKE HERE

THAT’S MY CAPTAIN!! Lxc wishes he could captain as good

she just greets him like usual and lets him in

HE HAS NO IDEA WHAT’S WAITING FOR HIM INSIDE

IT’S AMAZING, JYL IS THE BEST

She leads him to the bedroom aND OH GOD, THE MINUTE LWJ’S EYES LAND ON WWX

HIS LIPS PART AS IF HIS BREATHING HITCHED IN HIS THROAT

HIS EYES NOTICEABLY WIDEN IN SURPRISE 

THERE’S A SLIGHT PAUSE IN HIS STEPS!!

AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

HE’S SUPER EXPRESSIVE HERE GUYS 

(...well, by lwj standards anyway)

And ooooh, wwx’s reaction is adorable!!

His eyes catch lwj’s gaze for half a second before they skitter down to the side as if seeing lwj in person (in his bedroom!!) is too much to take in all at once!

HE’S SO FLUSTERED?? HIS EYES ARE FLICKERING TO AND FRO TRYING TO LOOK AT ANYTHING BUT LWJ. 

HE’S SO NERVOUS IT’S ADORABLE I CAN’T HANDLE IT

(i may have rewound to watch this scene 3x, DON’T JUDGE ME)

(there was so much happening! Lwj’s beautiful plush lips parted, wwx was acting cutely bashful)

(WHAT WAS I SUPPOSED TO DO WITH THAT, HUH? JUST WATCH IT ONCE AND MOVE ON?? I DON’T THINK SO)

And you know, jyl leads lwj like, right to wwx’s bedside and WATCHES ALL THIS GO DOWN

YOU KNOW SHE NOTICED ALL THESE THINGS TOO

I’M NOT A CRAZY PERSON HERE

Jyl: thank you, lwj! Without you, wwx would not have woken up so soon!

Jyl: you two go ahead and talk now

Jyl: i’ll just go tend to the other wounded

Jyl: and leave you both here ~all alone~

Jyl: in this bedroom

Jyl: with wwx just in his under-things

Jyl: still on his rumpled bed

Jyl: okay, byyyyeee~!

(LXC AND JYL NEED TO HANG OUT AND TALK ABOUT THEIR LITTLE BROTHERS AND HOW HOPELESS THEY ARE AROUND EACH OTHER)

(THIS IS A THING THAT NEEDS TO HAPPEN)

Okay, and now not only do we get MORE wangxian time, we also just get the most beautiful scene ever?? Like, aesthetically? THIS SHOW IS A BLESSING

Lwj is playing his guqin in the communal area next to wwx

The music is gorgeous (it's the same Magic Music from before! it sounds like warm morning sunlight on a calm spring day)

And the set is beautiful, all reds and whites to match our boys’ colors, and it’s all emphasized with equally beautiful lighting

Wwx: lan zhan, actually, i--

Lwj: quiet. Concentrate.

Wwx POUTS and taps his nose and then SULKILY crosses his legs

HE’S THE MOST ADORABLE BOY IN THE WORLD AND I LOVE HIM

IF LWJ WOULDN’T MURDER ME IMMEDIATELY, I’D GO AND PROPOSE TO WWX RIGHT NOW

ACTUALLY I’D PROBABLY DO IT ANYWAY

I’VE LIVED A GOOD LIFE, I PROBABLY WON’T ACCOMPLISH MUCH ELSE WITH IT. IT’S TOTALLY WORTH IT.

Ahem

Back to the utterly breathtaking wangxian scene

No seriously, EVERYTHING IS SO GORGEOUS?

ALL THESE BEAUTIFUL SHOTS

THE CLOSE UP ON THE FLOWERS

THE UNFOCUSED SHOTS THROUGH THE HANGING SCREENS

THE LIGHTING THE COLORS THE MUSIC

LWJ IN HIS PHENOMENAL WHITE OUTFIT AND WWX IN HIS INDECENT RED ROBES

IT ALL ADDS UP TO THIS SYRUPY DREAMY SCENE THAT’S JUST, UGH, DRIPPING WITH TENDERNESS AND ROMANCE

IT’S TOO MUCH IT’S TOO MUCH

Okay, i’m done geeking out over the aesthetics

Oh, wwx is breaking his meditation pose and flexing his wrists excitedly!

Wwx: lan zhan, i’m all better now!

Lwj stops playing and calmly makes his way to the bed where wei ying is and checks him

Lwj: three more days are needed

Wwx does not like this answer lol. He leaps up from the bed all affronted

Wwx: but i’m totally fine now, look! *starts flexing his arms around*

Lwj is not budging on this tho

Lwj: exorcise evil, ease the mind. Do not be neglectful

Wwx: exorcise evil? I don’t need an exorcism!! I just used too much energy

Cue awkward silence (lwj’s eyes never waver from wwx tho)

Lwj: wei ying (you know, i think he just likes saying his name...)

Wwx: lan zhan, do you really think that Plot Device 2 is evil? Do you really believe there’s an undetectable something that can change someone from good to evil?

Ooooh, wwx is getting all philosophical on us!!

His brow is all furrowed here; he’s hurt that lwj doesn’t trust him with Plot Device 2!

And that’s the end of that MOST DELICIOUS SLICE WANGXIAN PIE

Other stuff happens

Screaming, the murder of innocent people, sect leaders debating on said murder of innocent people

You know, boring stuff.

There was a fun bit here tho

Nmj: maybe it’s okay to kill innocent civilians…

Lxc: *sad face*

Nmj: uh, maybe we can NOT kill defenseless people this time?

Ahhh, if only lan zhan’s sad face was effective on wei ying as lxc’s is to nmj…

Plot plot plot Jgs being an asshole Plot plot plot

MORE plot plotty plot plot

OH NO

WE’RE ON A CLIFF IN NIGHTLESS CITY

THAT CLIFF WE DON’T LIKE

THAT REALLY REALLY HORRIBLE AWFUL NO GOOD CLIFF

AND WWX IS STANDING CLOSE TO THE EDGE OF IT GET AWAY FROM THERE WWX, GET AWAY RIGHT NOW

And now lwj joins him

Wwx: lan zhan, what do you think of the people here? Who is good, who is evil?

Yeesh, getting right into the heavy stuff aren’t we

Like, nbd, i’m just gonna compLETELY CHANGE YOUR WORLDVIEW AND TEACH YOU SHADES OF GRAY (AGAIN)

Oooh, but as he says that, he starts clutching at his chest and swaying on his feet! Bc the resentful energy is hurting him!!!

Lwj grabs his arm to steady him

Lwj: wei ying, concentrate

Great, it’s about to get real hurt-y now

Lwj: wei ying, do you want to learn how to play Magic Music?

Wwx: lan zhan, you want me to learn that? Do you doubt me, too?

And the way he says it!! It’s a tone that says “please don’t let this be true”

BUT LWJ LOOKS AWAY AND FLASHBACKS TO WHAT WRH WAS RANTING ABOUT AT THE BEGINNING OF THE EP

WHY ARE YOU DOING THAT LWJ. WHY.

So instead of answering wwx, he just questions him on why he made Plot Device 2???

THAT IS THE WRONG APPROACH LWJ

THAT WILL NOT GET YOU WHAT YOU REALLY WANT 

Wwx: lan zhan, if i told you i got a Screaming Sword of Resentment from the Murder Turtle would you believe me?

Lwj keeps answering questions with questions and the whole convo is devolving horribly

Lwj: if you already knew the sword had Plot Device stuff in it, why did you refine it?

Wwx: LAN ZHAN, ENOUGH

he snaps at lwj

he raised his voice at lwj

Lwj: you promised you’d let me help you (he says calmly)

Wwx: if you don’t believe in me, how can you help me?

OUCH

Lwj: Plot device 2 isn’t safe, you might lose control!

Wwx: you’re scared i’ll be like wen ruohan, but i’m not him! And Plot Device 2 is not the same as Plot Device!

And then before we can get too emotional about our soulmate boys being at odds (AGAIN), we get to witness the murder of innocent people

How fun

Jin Zixun shows us he’s scum of the earth by trying to shoot down a Wen mother carrying her child as she flees

Thank goodness lwj guqin’s the arrow away

There’s a confrontation but lwj doesn’t let wwx tear into jin zixun even tHO HE CLEARLY DESERVES IT

And everyone leaves but not before wwx comments that there’s gonna be a lot of resentment here where the innocents were killed and that the place needed Magic Music 

Oh, turns out lwj didn’t leave

Lwj stays at the scene of the crime and plays Magic Music on his guqin.

As soon as wwx hears it, he starts playing counterpoint on his flute!

I love it when they play music together, Magic or not!!

We cut away here to watch lxc, nmj, and jgy become Official Bros™

BORING

Now Jgs and jgy are hosting a banquet

STILL BORING

Political posturing happens

SO BORING

Wait, something interesting just happened!

We see lwj just up and leave the banquet the moment he realizes wwx isn’t there

Bc wwx is out on the steps getting drunk

(wwx, we’ve talked about this. Drinking is not a Solution)

Wwx: lan zhan, it’s you! How about playing some Magic Music? (I'm detecting some sarcasm…)

Lwj: i’m learning a new score

Wwx: *scoffs* you haven’t given up yet? You’re really stubborn *mocking snort*

STOP BEING MEAN, WWX

That’s the last bit of wangxiantics we have for this episode

JYL GAVE US SUCH A GREAT MOMENT AND WE ENDED UP AT ODDS AGAIN

IT’S A WHOLE "ONE STEP FORWARD, TWO STEPS BACK" SITUATION

I DON’T LIKE IT

Return to Masterpost

[florrickandassociates]

TGF Thoughts: 3x08-- The One Where Kurt Saves Diane

I wrote this over the span of, like, a full year and it is not very interesting. I am posting it simply because I am committed to the idea of writing something about every episode of this series. I recommend that you go check out Evil instead of reading this.

I’m just not intrigued by the clips of news footage about some sort of “Unredacted Unspecified Report” that open this episode.

Diane doesn’t seem to be that interested either: she’s not watching and talks over it. 

More interesting (but, tbh, not actually that interesting to me either, because I’m losing interest in this season) is that Diane gets a letter of warning from a ~mysterious source~. 

Most interesting of all: Diane and Kurt have a normal morning together.

Kurt spots the letter first and opens it. STOP DIANE. THEY KNOW ABOUT THE HACK. So maybe it’s directed at Kurt. Or maybe it’s supposed to say, “Stop, Diane.”

I still haven’t warmed to Diane’s bedroom set, especially because it still feels like Diane lives in her bedroom and her home has no other rooms. 

Joy, Felix Staples has returned. All I have to say about this case is that the day this ep aired, basically what’s happening in this case happened in real life, because… Kings. 

Hello, it’s October now and I suddenly felt like returning to The Good Universe and writing. It’s been a while. 

My memory of this episode/arc is that Diane and Liz just did something uncharacteristically dumb and illegal, and this is the episode where Kurt secretly puts an end to the shenanigans without Diane even knowing. I remember this episode being satisfying, if only because it got rid of the aforementioned dumb and illegal plot. Let’s see how good my memory is. 

Wait why don’t I remember Roger Bart being on this show and why didn’t I note it earlier?! How could I let George The Killer Pharmacist go unmentioned?! 

On that note, how did I not use the opening scene of the season (Diane saying “I’m happy” as an excuse to ramble about how weird it is to experience happiness on a personal level in today’s world?) (I was just watching 3x01.)

I’m actively not watching the case scenes so they don’t kill my drive to actually write this. 

Oh God, I’m going to have to deal with Blum again at some point. I had blocked out his bloviating. I think this is the last of the Blum/Maia free eps? 

The weird Lucca/British actor plot is still happening!!!! I didn’t miss it during all those months in which I wasn’t reminded of it. 

The joke about how these TV lawyers aren’t like other TV lawyers, except they are, was funny the first time. 

Always great to see how Lucca, who is the head of a department at this point, gets called into other cases frequently. Definitely how things work. 

Is it bad that I’m more interested in making a mental list of all the times TGF/TGW have filmed in this little park than this Marissa/Alan Alda scene? 

I can see why this is the episode that made me stop writing these for a bit. So far, this ep is all case and a subplot I don’t care for.

You know what else was funny the first time and has hit a point of diminishing returns? The thing where a main character’s love interest shows up in court and then they get thrown off their game and it’s CUTE FLIRTING!!! Find a new, unique way to signal interest, writers! 

This gag now involves literal gagging. I’m overjoyed. 

Lucca’s monologuing at a toilet about her crush. This plot is cute. It isn’t bad. It is watchable. BUT! I know it’s a novelty, so I’m just not that excited by it or invested in it. It’s not really deepening my understanding of Lucca. 

Lucca picturing everyone in court in their underwear is just unnecessary and honestly not funny??? 

Kurt leaves the warning note out for Diane to see. He confronts her about it and she asks for a drink.

The credits are at 19 minutes in. I do love them. Have any of you watched Evil yet? I watched part of the first episode (I intend to go back to it, I’ve just been busy) and the credits resemble the TGF credits. (Update as of March 2020: I watched all of Evil and you should too.)

Diane tells Kurt about Book Club or #Resistance or whatever I was calling it. Even though Diane doesn’t tell him the full story (mostly for his own protection, and she makes it clear she’s omitting stuff), I do appreciate that Diane and Kurt don’t keep secrets from each other, and if/when they do, they talk about it openly and calmly. I love them. 

(I have blocked out Kurt/Holly almost entirely. I know it’s canon, but I still don’t believe it was anything other than a plot device to motivate some unnecessary drama in the TGW finale. God, that finale was bad. Ghost Will? Kurt cheating? GENEVA and Peter? GHOST WILL? Even the slap, which is one of my favorite parts, is more powerful as a symbol than as an actual plot development, since (1) Alicia betraying Diane is something Pilot!Alicia would’ve done to any friend to protect her family and (2) it stems from the nonsense about Kurt cheating and Peter tampering with evidence. What a letdown of a finale. The Kings are lucky they got to redeem themselves with TGF.)

(As anyone who’s had a one-on-one convo with me about the TGW finale at any point in the last three years will tell you, I will NEVER tire of discussing it, even if it means rehashing the same points over and over and over.)

I forgot about the thing where it wouldn’t stop storming in season 3. 

Don’t have much to say about Kurt devising a plan to help Diane get out of trouble, but I do find it very fun! 

OOOOH this is the episode about censorship that got censored!!! If you haven’t already, do read Emily Nussbaum’s piece about the behind-the-scenes drama of this episode. I thought the “this content has been censored” screen where the short would have been was a joke… but it was actually censored. That may be the most interesting thing about this episode.

I want more character-driven plots. I want more Liz and Lucca. I have nothing to say. 

Book Club still believes the con artist who brought them together is something other than a con artist. Book Club is not that smart for being a collection of very smart people. 

“So the whole group is bullshit?” Liz asks when Diane loops her in. Yes. But also, like, this is what happens when you do illegal shit with a group formed by a literal con artist. Liz may have an excuse for trusting the group (Diane brought her in), but why does DIANE trust them? 

“My life is simple, Diane. I have a son. I have a mortgage. I have my job. And I go from home to work and work to home. So this stuff is, this bullshit intrigue… I’m done. Too much drama,” Liz laments, about a week too late. Where was this last week when Liz was like YES LET’S DO CRIMES? 

One of my problems with the whole Book Club arc is that it makes very little sense that Liz would get involved in the first place. I understand why she would be sympathetic to their cause and willing to look the other way on their methods… if she were watching a news report about them on TV. She’s too practical, and has too much to lose, to get involved with a group like this. 

An NSA nerd is back!! He’s the one warning Diane! 

Okay, picking this back up in March 2020 because *gestures at the world* I have time. Like, I have so much free time I’ve finished 9 books in the last 14 days AND finally made it to the episodes of The Sopranos with JMargs. I began watching The Sopranos in 2017.

As I write this, I have no idea if TGF is coming back on April 9th as planned or not. Unless there’s something in the works for season 4 that can’t possibly be left unfinished or air today, I think they should air whatever they have now. TGF is always timely, and while scenes set in an office are suddenly feeling weird and implausible, they’ll probably play better now than in six months. And we’d all forgive the writers if they had to wrap up the arcs through an animated recap song. 

It’s been a while since I’ve seen the TGF credits so I rewound to watch the credits. I went to 2 minutes into the episode, then remembered… they’re 20 minutes in.

Y’all. They blow up a purse with hand sanitizer in it. Did they predict this?! 

I wrote that preamble and then stopped writing. But now we know that TGF is really coming back on April 9th, which means I have to stop watching The Sopranos and write these things! 

Ah, Felix Staples. I haven’t missed you! 

Case stuff happens. Really riveting episode, this one. (It is an interesting case, though.)

Kurt saving Diane is pretty fun. But I don’t have anything to say about it and to write about it would just to be to give a half-assed play by play… and why?

Oh WOW, Lucca and Downton Abbey guy is still happening?! 

Getting to see Kurt be really competent and caring is the best thing, by far, about the Book Club arc.

Wait, I take that back, Liz’s speech about voter suppression is also pretty high up there-- as long as you ignore the context. 

V excited (!!) to get back to Maia’s bullshit in the next few episodes, not because I want to watch it but because if there’s one thing I’m actually motivated to write about, it’s how the show has handled Maia Rindell. Also, they handle the next few episodes well for her. 

Oh RIGHT Liz tells ChumHum about her dad’s sexual harassment issues! And Adrian and Liz are finally going to tell the press! It may mean losing Neil Gross, though. 

Book Club is over! Wooooooooooooooooooooo! On to more interesting things!!!

Also gone? Downton Abbey guy, who gave an interview about something new and exciting in his life. Lucca thought he was talking about her, and he was talking about some...personality test that sounds like a cult from the way he describes it? AAAAAND I Googled it and yup. It is. What a goofy ending to this arc I didn’t care about. Reminds me of the way the Marilyn arc ended (with a cameo from a celebrity who she was supposedly sleeping with). Glad the actor was so game to poke fun at himself, but is this the best we can do for Lucca? 

Diane thinks she took care of the hack and made it go away. Kurt lets her take the credit. 

The end! 

[wreaths-of-myrtle-and-rose]

i finished umbrella academy last night and am currently working my way through the stages of devastation so i’m going to yell about my thoughts, but under a cut so as to prevent spoilers and annoyance. keep reading if you like people yelling incoherently about emotionally stunted superheros

i know a lot of people are pissed about allison and luther’s relationship, and tbh i’m not entirely sure how i feel about it, but @findingfandomwithafangirl came up with a pretty dope explanation that would explain a lot. allison rumored luther into loving her. we’ve already been shown that allison uses her power for some pretty yikesy things, and i don’t think that’s too much of a stretch. people are saying that the “i heard a rumor you love me” is about allison’s ex-husband, but that doesn’t make a lot of sense in context, and i think the luther explanation is very plausible and would fix some of the issues with them

i love diego, but whoever did the fight choreo for this show really dropped the ball on him. it’s been a while since i saw the first few eps, but this knife boi’s fighting style changes so dramatically over his storyline that i’m just like ????? his powers are sometimes really obvious when he throws and then sometimes not at all and i’m just like why?

the scenes between five and the handler give. me. life. 

ben is easily one of the top three characters on this show but we legit know nothing about him! how did he die? why is he always with klaus? how did his power work? tell me

most of the show was spoiled for me since i was dumb and went through the tumblr tag but thanks to everyone on here for not spoiling the leonard/harold reveal so i could experience that devastation in real time

god leonard is the fucking worst i hate him so much

the opening sequence of episode 10 confused me so much

i rewatched the first ep recently and i forgot how much i loved the scene at the pool (and we agree that that was vanya’s mom, right?) 

the freakin monocle. i swear to god.

diego’s stutter and the way grace helped him with it and then the way it came back after she died :,(

grace starts wearing her hair down once pogo reboots her

KLAUS. just KLAUS. holy shit i love him

i loved the contrast between the muted, soft colors and peaceful atmosphere of the Vietnam club klaus was at with dave in ep 6 and the flashing lights and danger of the rave he was at in ep 7 

the way they did klaus’s triggers was....interesting. crawling on the floor at a nightclub triggered him, but not being in an active shooter situation at the bowling alley? i am in no way remotely an expert on ptsd but that just seems odd to me

hazel being awkward and nervous around five because he’s a lEgeNd at the commission was so fucking funny to me

so. y’all remember the scene where hazel and cha cha attack the academy, right? do you remember the moment when vanya was hiding against the wall and hazel was about to walk past but then he left? what if he had taken just one step forward and found her? what if they had tortured vanya instead of klaus? that means no vietnam, no dave, none of that anguish for klaus, and it means that vanya’s power would have come into play so much earlier, since she would’ve been in a terrifying situation without her meds. interesting thought, right?

as a whole, the siblings just seem......so much less surprised than they should about their brothers/sisters just,,,fuckin,,,disappearing all the time? why did no one look for klaus when he was kidnapped? why did it take so long for them to find vanya? why is that not a bigger concern here?

hazel and agnes are cute but i’m so unsure about their ages that their relationship seems a little odd

why can random people just? walk into the academy? they need better security

why aren’t more people talking about the scene when klaus fucking slams a snow globe into his face, i rewound and watched that scene like three times because i was so shook

i am so excited to see what’s gonna happen next

[paceofbase]

HACF Rewatch Recap: S02E09

Cameron’s changed her tune SO much about Community since even 3 eps ago. But lol at them randomly deciding “Hey! Let’s go to a shooting range!!”

Okay I really love that he knows these really little random facts about Cameron. Also, eggs and green chilies are so fucking good tho. Has anyone had these?

I’m so glad this line was included okay

Can I just point out that this was what I was going through in a parking garage in Atlanta? Lmaoo. Maybe it was the same parking garage?

I mean, really, there’s no lie haha. But it’s so nice to see Joe sticking up for Mutiny this much. He cares too much about these people to let them down this much

This was so important bc we finally see Cameron believe that Joe didn’t do it but they still go through with their plan to sabotage him

This was so funny and cute hahah

Did anyone ever notice how much this breakup mirrored Joe and Sara’s. Both of these breakups are completely about how Joe and Cameron can’t get over each other. Cameron doesn’t even bother arguing with Tom bc he’s not wrong

YES THE BEST SCENE. The chemistry here. Look at her reaction to finding out he’s married. Pretty much exactly the same as Joe’s reaction to her getting married in S3

As Mackenzie said, Cameron meant every word here. You can see it on her face entirely and in that kiss, but she still has a task to do so it’s obviously not innocent haha. But oh he looks like he’s regretting that marriage right there lmao

THIS. KISS. HOLY GOD. Look at the passion in this jfc. This was worth waiting nearly an entire season (and I’d like to point out that I rewound this like 5 times just now). And then we don’t get their next kiss until E09 of the next season too 

Look at this lil shit just sitting next to his wife like he didn’t just share a passionate kiss with his ex

Look at how he says Cameron’s name. Sara had quite the point here lmao

I feel like we never really get a chance to see Scoot’s acting chops but wow. This part is so sad

I don’t need a reminder of Cameron and Bos parting ways like in S3 okay. It’s too hard for me when they aren’t happy together. And he called her Catherine again and I can’t

Can we talk about how much I love this outfit of Donna’s?

“You’re an accident.” Wow all these people Joe falls for just do not see great things about him lmao

Again, look at the mirroring with Cameron and Tom’s breakup. He’s completely silent once Cameron gets brought up bc there’s no use in arguing against it

Now Cameron starts fighting for her relationship with Tom. You’re a little late now, hon

[piecesofscully]

The Songbirds are Singing

This was written for @txf-fic-chicks Post Ep Challenge.  No beta, just written and posted.  It’s post “Paperclip.”

Author: piecesofscully Rating: teen Spoilers: Season 3′s “Paperclip”

Her jacket falls to the chair with a muted thump, followed by the discarding of her purse and shoes.  The yellowed beams of street lamps stream through her slitted blinds, offering her just enough of a glow for her to see as she pads across her living room floor to the stereo.  The mixed tape Missy had made her years ago still sits rewound in the cassette player from her last impromptu visit, having been played and rewound multiple times over a few bottles of wine and stories full of laughs.  

“Ah, remember Jodi from down the street?” Missy had asked.  “The one with the curly brown hair and gap in her teeth?”

“How could I forget?” Dana had said between sips of merlot.  “Her boobs stole my boyfriend that summer.”

Melissa had gasped.  “Oh my god, that’s right!  Henry!  He went around for weeks afterwards bragging about how she let him put his hand up her shirt!”

“I should have known…”

“Maybe if you would have stuffed your-”

“I was fourteen!” Dana had said with a cough, nearly choking on her wine.  

“So much drama over a B cup,” she’d said as she laughed.  “You cried for weeks.”

“I’m going to need more wine.”

Her index finger slides along the buttons until she feels the indentations for the Play button, then presses it down.  Piano begins to filter through the speakers, the light-hearted intro contrasting the sudden darkness she feels bleeding into her apartment.  She gingerly lowers herself onto her couch, and mindlessly flicks on the lamp that sits nearby.  

For you, there'll be no more crying.

For you, the sun will be shining.

And I feel that when I'm with you,

It's alright, I know it's right.

“Sometimes I feel like we should have been twins,” Melissa had said.

Dana’s eyebrow raised, and she had laughed.

“No, seriously.  Seriously, Dana, stop laughing and hear me out!  You and I, it’s like we’re the same person.”

Tears had begun to trail down Dana’s face as she laughed harder.  

“Dammit, Dana, I know we’re different, but sisters have a special bond, you know,” Melissa had said, her voice echoing into the nearly empty glass of wine.

“Well, yeah,” Dana had replied, wiping her eyes.  “We grew up together.”

“No, I mean, our souls are connected, intertwined, tethered together for eternity. Wherever you are, Dana, I’m there, too.”

From the drawer of the side table, she pulls out what’s left of a short stick of incense and the small glass holder Melissa had given her as a birthday gift years before.  It feels smooth and lightweight between her fingers, it’s emerald color glimmering under the lamp.  With the light of a match and the quick forced rush of her breath, the tip of the incense begins to smolder.  A thin line of smoke twirls from the end gracefully, the way Melissa used spin in the center of the kitchen while pretending to be a ballerina.  

The warm musky scent of patchouli surrounds her, it’s smell tweaking the sides of her mouth into a small smile. It’s sweet undertones remind her of summer evenings from long ago, of two teenage girls listening to Fleetwood Mac’s Tusk album on repeat.   It reminds her of a time when she was Dana, just Dana.  

And for a moment it feels as if Melissa is sitting right there next to her, cuddled into the far corner of the couch with her legs folded underneath her.  

To you, I'll give the world.

To you, I'll never be cold.

'Cause I feel that when I'm with you,

It's alright, I know it's right.

Melissa would roll her eyes dramatically, and inform her that patchouli was for depression, it’s properties used to help ease you from the murky depths of the prison of your own inner mind.  

“Feel the hurt and then let it go, Dana,” she would say.  “Don’t hold onto it, that’s toxic.  Death, no matter how sudden, isn’t an ending.”

“I know, Missy,” Dana whispers into her empty apartment as she curls herself into the opposite corner of her couch.

“Energy doesn’t vanish or die, it transfers,” she would say.  “You of all people should know that, Miss Bachelors Degree in Physics.  Our souls are energy; energy that’s just waiting for the right moment to transfer and bring a new form of beauty into the world.”

And the songbirds are singing, like they know the score.

And I love you, I love you, I love you, like never before.

And I wish you all the love in the world.

But most of all, I wish it from myself.

And, when alive, she had been that very beauty in the world.  Her life was lived loudly, and without regrets or apologies.  She was as vibrant as the red roses that bloomed in spring, the air about her had been exuberant and invigorating.  

Never a woman to be eclipsed into a shadow, her emanation too stunningly bright and commanding of attention, her energy affecting the incoming and retreating tides of Dana’s life from a distance.  Now, even in death, her rich presence still lingers.  

Hot tears sting Dana’s eyes.  “I don’t…” she whispers hoarsely, not trusting her voice to remain strong.  “I don’t know how to do this alone, Missy.”

Her sister would smile, her eyes shaded with a thin veil of sadness, and then grasp her hand.  “You do,” she would say, her voice encouraging. “You’re not alone, Dana.”

A sob that has been gradually building and churning in the highest part of her belly finally escapes Dana’s lips as she buries her face in her hands.

And the songbirds keep singing, like they know the score

And I love you, I love you, I love you

Like never before, like never before, like never before.

The last few chords of the song are interrupted by the muffled shrill of her cell phone, and Dana immediately wipes her eyes and sniffles sharply, composing herself as if the caller has just walked through the door and caught her in a vulnerable moment.   She sighs heavily as the ringing persists, and shakes her head briskly, then heaves herself off of the couch, stops the tape, and crosses towards her summoning.  

“Scully,” she answers curtly.

“Hey, did I wake you?”

“Mulder?”  Her brows furrow.

“The one and only,” he quips.  “Well, really there are actually plenty of Mulder’s-”

“I wasn’t sleeping,” she answers with a sigh.

He pauses, waiting for her to continue.  When she doesn’t, he asks, “How are you?”

“I’m fine,” she answers quickly, then eases herself back down to the couch.  

“Right,” he says, and she can practically see him pursing his lips.  “Of course.”  

She pulls the blanket from the back of the couch and lets it tumble into a heap across her body, like the comfortable silence that has fallen between them.  If she strains she can hear the slow rhythm of his breathing, and she finds herself slowing her own, matching his relaxed pace.

Inhale, exhale.  Inhale, exhale.  She closes her eyes.  

“Hey, Scully.”  His voice penetrates the quiet, it’s warmth and tenderness slowly mending the frayed edges of her heart with each syllable.  She hums in response.

“Did I ever tell you the story of Kenneth Arnold?”

Her swollen eyes ache as her smile reaches her eyes.  “About how he saw nine high-speed flying saucers near Mount Rainier?”

“I’ll take that as a yes.”

She pulls the blanket to her chin, settling in deeper into the cushions of the couch.  “Tell me again, Mulder.”