#god i am SUCH a sucker for s1 bellarke

[kay-emm-gee]

Can you if you feel like it write some hurt/comfort Bellarke where he got hurt doing something absolutely stupid (getting in a fight or smth) and she is mad tilting his bruised face to herself and huffing angrily in the season 1 verse? Or if not maybe some pregnant clarke in canonverse whichever season/scenario you'd like. I love your wriitng so much!!! I've missed it!

I looooved this prompt (god, I miss s1 bellarke), so thanks for sending it in (and for you kind words!!) Also, title is based on lyrics from Hard Work by Ella Henderson. 

***

my only working remedy

Clarke had just finished helping Monroe haul wood to the smokehouse when she noticed Bellamy. Or rather, she noticed the large bruise that covered half of his cheek. Sighing, she straightened her shoulders and headed for him.

He and two other delinquents were just securing a repaired section of the wall into place when she reached him. Hands on her hips, she watched him bang on it with his fist twice to make sure it was stable. Always double checking, she thought to herself amusedly. For all that he came off hotheaded and impulsive, she had by now realized he was thoughtful and concerned more than he let on. So when he turned, Clarke was not surprised to see a barely-there grin of satisfaction at a job well done on his face.

That grin dropped as soon as he spotted her, however.

“Bellamy,” she said evenly, lips pursed. “You should have come to see me about that.” She gestured to his bruised cheek.

“It’s nothing,” he muttered.

Clarke just barely held back from rolling her eyes at his stubborn tone. As she watched his jaw work, she glanced pointedly at the two teenagers helping him. They scampered off, clearly not needing verbal indication that they should get lost. The entire camp had witnessed enough of her and Bellamy’s standoffs by now to know that it was best to evacuate the area, lest they be caught in the crossfire.

“It’s not nothing,” she argued. “And you know the rule: anyone gets injured, they come to me. Most bumps and scrapes I can fix if I get to them early, but complications from untreated injuries...those aren’t something I can easily fix.”

“What are you going to do about a bruise?” He shot back as he gathered several of the tools the others had left behind. “It’s not like we have cooling gel down here. And besides, it doesn’t hurt.”

Clarke rolled her eyes at the obvious lie. “No, but I do have a needle and thread to stitch up that oozing cut on your cheekbone. Do you want that to get infected? Because at the rate you’re going, it will.” She glanced pointedly at his dirt-streaked...well, everything. “And do you know what we don’t have down here besides cooling gel? Antibiotics. So you are coming with me.”

Bellamy just snorted derisively and turned to walk away. She darted into his path, staring up at him. He glared back, then tried to push past her. Clarke was too fast for him though. She grabbed his arm and yanked him back close to her.

“Infections can turn nasty, Bellamy. I’ve seen it before in the clinic on the Ark. Do you want to risk it? And leave Octavia on her own if it does turn bad? If you’re that scared of a little needle…” She feigned a dismissive huff, shook her head, and then waited.

His eyes flashed with outrage, but he didn’t counter her argument. And when she felt the muscles beneath her hand relax, she knew she had won. Suppressing a relieved sigh, Clarke dropped his arm and headed for the dropship. Bellamy followed, though she could feel him glaring daggers at her back the whole way.

She gestured for him to sit when they reached the corner of the first floor that she had claimed for her medical treatment area. Bellamy plopped down on a makeshift stool without a word, but Clarke didn’t miss the way his shoulders drooped, as if in relief for the break. Frowning, she cast surreptitious glances at him as she gathered the necessary materials to treat the cut. He seemed more exhausted than usual. They all needed more rest and less worry, but she knew that was even more true for Bellamy. He took on too much. She knew it. Everyone knew it. But they also knew that he wouldn’t stop, and if Clarke was being honest, she knew they might not make it if he did.

Clearing her thoughts, she moved to his side. After rinsing her hands with moonshine, she took Bellamy’s chin firmly in her hands and tipped his left cheek up to examine it. She sucked in a breath as the harsh white light illuminated what turned out to be a very nasty bruise. It looked so much worse than it had outside in the light of the setting sun.

“How’d you get this?” She asked as she released his chin.

He glanced sideways at her, then muttered. “Does it matter how I got it?”

Clarke rolled her eyes. So stubborn and closed off, always.

“This is going to sting,” she said curtly, pressing a moonshine-soaked rag to the open cut.

Bellamy twitched and hissed, but he didn’t pull away. She dabbed at the wound a few more times before reaching for the threaded needle. She sterilized it once more, then began stitching. He closed his eyes and inhaled sharply at the first push and pull of the needle. Not for the first time, she wished she had some type of local anesthetic. She braced herself for him to flinch as she kept stitching, but he didn’t move a muscle. Clarke was grateful, because it made her work go easier and faster, but she knew it had to hurt like hell.

“Try to keep it clean,” she warned once she had finished. “And I’ll take them out once it looks like it’s healing up. If it feels hot to the touch or is leaking pus or blood, come to me.”

He stood, and she didn’t miss his eye roll.

“I’m serious, Bellamy,” she snapped.

“When are you not serious, princess?” His grin was mocking and razor-sharp as he turned away from her.

Anger bubbled up in her gut at his cavalier attitude. She threw the used rags back into the bucket so hard that moonshine sloshed over the edge.

“Do you think this is a joke? That what I’m doing here is that superfluous?” She shouted. “I may not be standing on that wall of yours with a gun, or going out to hunt for meat, but I am also working to keep us safe. To keep us alive. To keep you alive, because we both know what will happen to all of them if something happens to you! And I can’t...we can’t...”

A hollow quiet filled the dropship once her shouts stopped echoing off the metal walls. Taking in a shaky breath, she murmured softly, “Do you trust me so little?”

Bellamy just watched her with an intense expression. He seemed taken aback, and she just stood there, hands on her hips, glaring at him with her stomach rolling. The moment stretched, and she felt heat rising from her neck onto her cheeks. She didn’t need his approval, never would, but here she was, still waiting for him to say something, anything.

“We need you,” he finally said, voice low and rough but also sincere. “I know it, and they know it. And I do...trust you.”

He gave her a curt nod, then strode towards the exit. Clarke sighed, then plopped onto the stool he had just vacated, both embarrassed at her outburst and relieved at his reassurance. She was wiping her damp hands on her thighs when she heard his footsteps stop.

“Clarke.”

She glanced up. Bellamy had stopped in the doorway and turned back to face her.

“If anything feels off with this,” he gestured to his face, “I’ll come back.” He paused, then gruffly said, “And thanks for the stitches.”

She smiled wanly at him. “Anytime. And try not to stop a fist with your face again.”

He rolled his eyes and let out a snort. “I make no promises.”

She let out a laugh under her breath as he walked down the ramp back into camp. That was the best she could hope for, she supposed. Nothing was guaranteed on the ground, but somehow, in this moment, Clarke was starting to feel a bit less like the earth was constantly shifting under her feet.

[sometimesrosy]

The 100 s5 rewatch, 5.01 Eden

Hey guys. I don’t know how these are going to turn out. The last time i did a liveblog of my rewatch it was 1-2-3. I’m not sure I have more insight to add, but my enjoyment. I am bellarke focused, but not solely bellarke, and I’m looking for things I’ve missed before. 

I also haven’t been participating in bellarkefamselfienight for various reasons, but mostly because every time I try, my icloud is not cooperating and it’s this whole big hassle and nah. So I thought I’d push to get this out for bfsn. If there are a lot of typos it’s because i’m a crap typist and I’m trying to write as I watch. So. be forewarned.

If you want me to tag you drop me a note. Or removed from the tags. :) I like liveblogs and rewatches and new watcher reactions so if you do it you can tag me too.

@captainwilldameron @kizo2703 @levivlio @kickthatassgirl @jeanie205 @starboybellamy @ezraewrites @alightinadarkland  @emmyisgrey @irisouy

  Here we go

First shot it the ring and then it slides through and down to earth, with Clarke digging out of the lab to a desolate land. Her outfit is good though. She hikes across the dry ocean bed, back to the spot where flokru left their stone markers and she digs up the rover. 210 miles to Polis but it’s nothing but a wasteland and the tower is down. She’s trying to dig the bunker out by hand. Screaming for her mom and telling her she’s here and eating tiny bits of ration bars. Ooh she finds the throne, is that he CL theme? Ooo but she collapses the whole tower from trying to get that staff out of the throne.

Oh voiceover. Who are you talking to Clarke? Who? Oh that’s right. Bellamy. 2 months alone, the tower collapsed, she heads to Arcadia and it’s the first time she feels alone. Maya’s iPod, Jasper’s goggles MOnty’s note. Poor Clarke. Now we see the voiceover is a call on the radio. Static. “Anyway I doubt you can hear me on this piece of crap radio… but please don’t feel bad about leaving me here. You did what you had to do. I’m proud of you.” Definitely to Bellamy.

Finally rain. She hasn’t had water in days. Now that she’s had water she seems much better. Eating bugs off the windshield. I LOVE when she digs the bugs off the grate and scarfs them down like they are delicious. Lol. But uh oh. We have a dangerous storm coming and she’s got to cover up from the elements too late for the solar panels. CLose the windows Clarke. Save yourself. Was that one of the glass storms? Ahh she’s heading for Farm Station and then the Solar Fields to get new solar panels for the rover. That’s when she dares the earth to kill her. And it almost does.

Dropping Lxa’s staff. Dropping Jaspers goggles. Dropping her coat and pack and falling to her knees in the desert. Now just falling. The vulture is trying to EAT her, and then she’s like wait It’s ALIVE. The first thing she sees is more desert, and then tumbles down the dune. Screaming Clarke.

“I”ve lost everything I”ve lost my friends, my father my mother. I’ve got nothing left!” Crying. Heading for the gun. And putting it to her head but there’s the vulture again. Follow it Clarke follow it.

There’s Eden. Heavenly music. “Thank You,” She says to the vulture and then shoots it.

That’s so Clarke.

Here’s Clarke eating in Eden. More voiceover. This one’s important to the whole season I think, and perhaps leads her, later, to  deciding to be the good guy. It’s showing how much she’s changed from the first Clarke, in season 1.

--I used to think life was about more than just surviving, but I’m not so sure anymore. Animals don’t feel guilty when they kill, they just do it. They kill or they get killed.

I tell myself that every life I took was for a reason. But the truth is the other side had reasons too. The grounders, the mountain men, even ALIE, their reasons to want us dead were the same as ours. It was us or them. Kill or be killed. Simple as that. So what now? What becomes of the commander of death when there is nothing left to kill. I guess we’ll find out now, because my fight is over. The question is, who am I now?”

She’s in the river, swimming. Being washed clean….

So that voiceover. That was talking to Bellamy, wasn’t it? She was having her moral dilemma to Bellamy.

She finds the village.

--Wait til you see this place. It’s like the death wave jumped over the entire valley. Unfortunately the radiation didn’t. “

Dead kids. Dead bodies. Just like in Mount Weather. Eerie

--I’ve lost track of how many bodies we’ve burned since reaching the ground. God this would be so much easier if I knew you were alive. If I knew I was going to see you again. Positive thoughts, Clarke.”

We see her sitting at a table now, her tone of voice much happier. The radio is back.  Joking about how the algae must suck but she found berries. Just talking to Bellamy. When you realize she’s just talking to him, and you know it lasts for 2199 days, it seems so sad and lonely. Oh look, she’s drawing the rocket taking off right now. So she’s thinking about when they left her and talking to them. Wait no. She sees a person. Madi.

Madi is a little hell child. Running from her. THen Clarke steps in the bear trap and Madi tells the fleimkepa to die and stabs her until she realizes she’s a night blood too and runs away. Hell child.

Clarke limps back to the cafe to sew her leg back up. I think I heard that they actually made that a lot less gory than they were going to. Poor Clarke, sweating and panting and now she’s asleep and Madi steals all her damn stuff! Hell child!

But she gets better, now limping around on Lxa’s staff and watching Madi spear fish.

“Last two people on earth and one of them happens to be the child from hell.

But there she is drawing a picture of Madi by the water. Clever Clarke lures her in with a picture of herself. And leaves. Madi comes closer and the music is suddenly soft and gentle.

Cut to grown Madi getting out of the rover and Clarke having caught fish. They’re going to get hair dye. Now the hair dying. Madi is talking about Clarke’s stories and her heroes, especially Octavia. Clarke says she’s not sorry they left without her because if she was with them she never would have met her.

“What about them? DO you think they’ll come back too?” Clarke says. The music changes to something longing and the camera pans up to Bellamy in the ring staring out the window looking at Eden. No words.

Echo and Raven sparring. Monty calling dinner and Raven using the distraction to get Echo.

“This isn’t eating it’s surviving,” harper said.

Ahh spacerkru. Eden is still just a dot and Raven and Bellamy are fighting over radiation, radios and living on earth while drinking green swill.

Emori likes spacewalks and likes to play outside in the void. While Bellamy is hassling Raven about not getting them to earth for 6 years and 7 days. They said they wouldn’t talk about it and Bellamy says sorry, and takes his punishment to check on Murphy.

Murphy jumps on his back, the troll. And Bellamy just rolls with it. He wants Murphy to come back to the others if he wins their sparring and Murphy says no because there’s no one to disappoint here, then he sucker punches Bellamy. They are so cute together. I mean they’re fighting but they’re not angry.

“You know what your problem is? You like being a hero. Except up here, there are no heroes.” I like the character development of s1 asshole murphy missing being the hero. Outcast murphy being DECLARED a hero. He just wanted to belong, and now he does...only he has problems with that, belonging. And Bellamy’s trying to force him to love himself. 

SO like down on Eden, we’ve got Clarke saying the good guys and bad guys are the same and life is just about survival, because that way she doesn’t feel guilt. And up there in space, Bellamy is saying there are no heroes and Murphy is afraid to be useless again. Then they spar and Bellamy pins him, “You’re not worthless, Murphy,” and he sees the Eligius. Immediately they’re back as a team, even if they don’t agree about communicating with Eligius. Murphy just wants to get to the ground and Bellamy wants to find out who they are first.

That clip of Clarke and Madi seeing the Eligius is a clip from s4. It’s the other actress that played Madi but you don’t see her face.

THERE’S the real Madi.  THey’re running from the Eligius, and Madi want to think that they are good guys but Clarke isn’t taking any chances. She’s going to be the girl under the floor.

Diyoza in armor and a mask revealed to be a pretty lady. She thinks it’s all clear when she’s got Wanheda scoping her. Oh the prisoners are just swarming. There’s shaw who looks dashing, and McCreary who looks like some sort of dangerous scorpion. “Non violent offenders with me?” Shaw says. “Yeah both of them.”

“You’re still my favorite mass murderer,” she says to McCreary. That’s just because she hasn’t met OUR mass murderers.

I love her little journal of their weapons, just like Lincoln had.

Except she hears then and comes running because some prisoner is going to shoot Madi. While the other guy is like leave the little kid aloe. Then Clarke shoots him and goes after the other one. Oh nope. Madi takes out the other prisoner. Her first kill.

Madi tries to keep Clarke from killing the other prisoner because she thinks he’s one of the good guys, and Clarke says, “There are no good guys.”

That’s important. The idea of good guys, heroes, who are they now?

Back to spacekru and Monty doesn’t want to go because they’ve been safe for 6 years. He doesn’t want to take the risk.

He doesn’t want to do it again, to have to be so strong. “No one should have to be that strong.”

Emori doesn’t want anything to do with Murphy and he packed her pack for her. Raven says he blew a good thing, because she’s annoyed about having a roommate for 6 months. He says it’s because she couldn’t get them back to the ground.

Bellamy’s final sweep to pick up Echo. “What are we gonna be now, Bellamy?”

“Nothing is gonna change on the ground.”

“I wish that were true.

“Oh I know it is.We kept each other alive. We’re family and nothing can change that.”

He thinks Octavia will understand, but then panics about her not being okay. Because she’ll forgive her too. “Bellamy, it took you three years.”

“Well I’m more stubborn than she is. Whatever it is down there Octavia will be the least of our worries.”

Smash cut to Octavia leading her death cult.

Oh Bellamy. That is like one full minute of famous lasts words, buddy.