#giving miss gw only the BEST

[namaeekaki]

Listened to Digimon's OST too much last week and ended up with this :)

[spadesolace]

drag me down: stockholm syndrome

synopsis: pham hanni isn't one to admit her feelings nor is she aware of her own feelings. but why does her heart aches watching you laugh with your friends or being physically affectionate with your friends?

words: 2.4k

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It didn’t take long for Y/N to realize that going out in the middle of the night only in her pajamas would get her sick. A cold didn’t kill anybody but she doesn’t want to risk getting others sick. Along with a fever that is quite high, it would be best to miss one day of school, despite hating it herself.

Hanni did not know that. After the short fight at Y/N’s place, she used her time to reflect and think things through. Why did she want to kiss her, what was in that atmosphere that in two consecutive nights led to her wanting some sort of affection from her rival? Seeing the empty chair next to her, no annoying Park Y/N next to her to annoy her. Shouldn’t it be bliss to have a bit of peace and quiet for once?

“She’s not going to class if that’s what you’re waiting for.” Chaewon showed her text with Y/N to Hanni, her personality being different in SNS. Who would have thought that seeing that had spark some flames in Hanni’s heart.

chaechae: why aren’t you in class?

ynn: im sick, body temp is 38 C with a bit of sniffles

chaechae: hehe sniffles, anyw gws!!! i’ll tell the girls

ynn: ily and thank u, chae

How is it that simple text makes Hanni’s blood boil to the point of possibly wanting to cause harm? This can’t be jealousy. It can’t be.

Within the entire day, where Y/N would sit, some people dared to sit next to Hanni. Most of which tried to copy her work, some were to converse with her, and then there was Jungwon who tried his best to keep the girl company. Neither of those made Hanni smile, laugh, it made her even more annoyed with everyone and everything. Jungwon still stayed after Hanni had told him off politely that he shouldn’t be transferring seats. Only to be rebutted.

“There’s no more seating arrangements, Hanni. Y/N isn’t here to take her seat so its free.” Hanni doesn’t have the energy to fight the guy when Chaewon was literally on a quick video call with Y/N.

“YAH! You told me to call you when it was time for you to take your meds.” She could only faintly see the sickly figure of Y/N who was laying on her bed with her laptop next to her. Would it be bad wanting to steal the phone for her to talk to Y/N?

Chaewon had turned around and placed her phone in front of Hanni, a smile on her face as she removed her earphones. The sickly figure on the screen looked at her with a small smile, her teasing smile that seemed so weak yet full of passion.

“I hope you’re not missing me much, Pham.” She may have looked annoyed but there was a hint of blush on her cheek.

“As if, Park.”

“Mhmm… Jungwon, get out of my seat.” Even if the voice was nasally, Hanni could easily distinguish Y/N’s voice whether it was joking or pissed. Jungwon would still be scared of Y/N either way, hurriedly saying goodbye and moving back to his place.

“Han.”

“Y/N.”

“Give the phone back to Chae.” Even if that was the end of that conversation, Hanni had a small smile on her face as Chaewon scolded Y/N. A bit of pain was still there but at least Hanni had managed to talk to you for a short while.

It didn’t slip past Minji to notice the change in demeanour of her best friend. One that rarely gets annoyed at people, to the point she would rather have her head chopped off if anyone would try to talk to her again. The small smile on her face was as clear as daylight, and watching the entire interaction just made Minji think about what had happened when the pair went out.

Hanni’s thoughts were interrupted by her phone, a message from Y/N. It was already rare to message each other that was not academics related, and upon seeing the message. Hanni’s thoughts had never been such a mess.

park y/n: why is he on my seat?

pham hanni: idk, he sat there bc you weren’t here

park y/n: ok.

Maybe it was the small interaction after half a day without Y/N annoying her or being in the same vicinity as her. Minji noticed the way Hanni had become calmer, no longer annoyed or had a hint of distaste. There’s something Park Y/N has that belongs to Hanni and it makes the gears in Minji’s head turn. Chaewon isn’t aware of anything happening behind her, let alone the burning gaze Hanni is sending her way.

“Oh shit.”

Hanni is oblivious to things, and Minji can easily work with it. A table filled with student council work with nothing but stress for the grad ball, Minji saw it as the perfect opportunity to simply ask questions. Between the two, Minji knows Hanni’s emotions better than anyone else; she’s the one that made Hanni realize her feelings for Jay was nothing but a crush, but with Jungwon - that was a mystery to Minji. She questioned why Hanni said yes to him courting her, or how she rarely spends time and effort with him.

Easing up to the conversation from grad ball preparations to asking Hanni who she’ll go with only to be answered that left Minji confused.

“Not Jungwon, that’s for sure.”

“What? He hasn’t asked you yet?” Hanni shook her head as she cleared the paperwork for the grad ball, finalising the sponsorship with Park Food Corporations.

“Y/N sorta asked me.” Confusion, concern, every other emotion as Minji processes every word that left Hanni’s mouth. How did Y/N even ask her out, or how Hanni agreed to it?

“So… during your date with Y/N?”

“Not a date.”

Minji could only look at Hanni with pure confusion. Being highly aware that both Hanni and Y/N were left alone the other day – according to Ms. Park Jihyo herself, they were even holding hands. Which makes Minji question if they’re dating behind everyone’s back or something else is going on.

Hanni’s mind has been a mess after the dinner at the Park estate. How their parents seem to like the pair together, even being asked to go to the graduation ball with Y/N. What is there to Y/N that makes her blood boil but at the same time miss her and get so irritated with everything else that does not relate to her. Even Jungwon can’t ease her mind, let alone she now sees him as some sort of hindrance to her abilities and goals in the future.

“Earth to Phampham? Helloooo?” Hanni shook her head, looking at the papers in front of her then to Minji who looked at her concerned. Park Food Corporations in her handwriting with the signature of their representative of the company below. All of her thoughts – from when she wakes up to laying in bed staring in the ceiling – all she could think of is Park Y/N.

“You good? You’ve been out of it for a while.” Minji checks her temperature, nothing out of the ordinary, just Hanni spacing out more than usual.

“I��m good, just tired.”

“Whatever you say, phampham. Just know that I’m here if you wanna talk.”

Hanni nodded, watching Minji pack up and leave her alone in the room. Alone with her thoughts. Alone with the scene of Y/N kissing her on repeat. Alone with the thought of Park Y/N.

Hanni slowly became more irritated with the people around her, especially after Y/N had come back and asked Minji if she could sit next to Chaewon. It wasn’t that bad at first, maybe the two had a lot to catch up on while she was gone but she could have asked Hanni regarding assignments and extracurriculars missed and not her friend. Minji taking notice of how Hanni easily snaps and loses focus as she watches Y/N across from her wearing a mask and slowly showing more signs of energy compared to the day she had come back. It was evident that Hanni was being avoided as if she carried the plague once Y/N had come back.

“That’s the third pencil you broke this week – are you sure you’re fine?” Hanni was not ok, whatever she’s feeling or whatever her thoughts of planning a murder and getting away with it. She is definitely not ok.

Even at lunch or when the pair lock the classroom for break, not a single conversation or an utterance of spite or hatred was thrown at Hanni. Silence. Like she doesn’t exist and the goal was to get away from her as soon as possible and it pains her to see Y/N smile at someone else other than her. There’s still the rival aspect but after what had happened, after the kiss, shouldn’t it be addressed that there is more to it than meets the eye.

In the table quite far from them sat Y/N’s circle, seeing the girl laughing at the things being thrown around the table, Hanni wishes she could be the reason for that stupid smile on your face. Watching Chaewon lean on her shoulder and watching the slight public display of affection, her right eye started twitching. Planning a murder in her mind as she watches how affectionate the pair is, she has never noticed how affectionate the girl is not until she realized how much space she occupies in Hanni’s mind (and possibly her heart).

“Do you think if I asked for a bottle of chloroform from our lab technician, I’d be a suspect in a possible murder case?” It was out of the blue, her entire friend group looked at her as if she’s insane, following her line of sight, it made sense that it would be directed at Y/N.

“Let your rival live, I’m just here for the plot of it.” Haerin watches how the table at the back seems to have its life back within the two days that Y/N was gone. It was a given fact that she was the sunshine along with Eunchae within the group and missing that meant silence and no one to tease Hanni to.

“Huh? Since when did Chaewon and Y/N become a couple?” Minji and Hanni looked at Danielle as if she had stated the most absurd thing aside from the possible murder case that Pham Hanni is planning in the back of her mind.

“They’re not!” Danielle, Haerin, and Hyein looked at the pair in shock - aside from Minji and her obvious crush on the feisty girl that she sits next to. It was the fact that Hanni’s reaction regarding the possible relationship was what made everyone lose it. Even she was shocked by what she had said.

“Oh my god – you like Pa-” Hanni covered Hyein’s mouth before she could finish her sentence. Minji assumed that was the case after the whole call incident and the graduation ball date. With the reaction like that, surely Hanni likes Y/N.

“That… explains… a lot.” The group looked at the eldest as the initial shock of the revelation finally sinks in to everyone. Pushing Jungwon away, getting snappy, and it’s all because of a girl.

“Shut it, Minji. That does not explain anything at all.”

“I thought you were straight.”

The group laughed at Haerin’s comment, only for Hanni to smack the cat-like girl. 

She doesn’t like Y/N, she’s merely intrigued by the girl that used to sit next to her and always consumes coffee as if her life depends on it. The girl that wears rings all the time and fidgets with it whenever she’s thinking or nervous - or how her uniform is always a mess and it’s her job to fix it while she gets a scolding from her. The girl that lowkey has anime merchandise keychains on her bag and no one would immediately get it unless they watch it. The very same girl that is the daughter to a rich family that she could possibly be the next owner of.

No, she doesn’t like Park Y/N. I’m in denial.

Hanni wonders how she ended up here, sitting in a cafe far from the counter holding a cup of hot chocolate while acting as if she’s reading a book but in reality she is just observing her rival preparing coffee.

Even in the cafe, she would go lengths to avoid Hanni such as making Sakura take her order. She didn’t expect for Hanni to be at the cafe, let alone she never knew that Hanni goes out and not stay in her room to study all day – it’s weirder to see Hanni out of nowhere than seeing a teacher during the weekend during normal day to day things.

“I’m guessing that’s Hanni.” Sakura leans on the counter as she watches the supposed owner of the cafe clean up. Seeing her ears slowly turn a shade of red simply from the mention of the girl’s name and tensing simply by looking at the one of the few customers they have during early in the morning.

“Can’t believe Chae already spilled you the details.”

“In exchange, she did admit to liking Minji. I think that’s a win-win scenario.”

Y/N chuckled at Sakura’s comment, it was deemed fair that Chaewon would know as to why there was a need to switch seats with Minji. In exchange, both of them admitted to liking their seatmates and partners for the project. The difference is that Chaewon isn’t fighting for the attention of her crush against multiple other people; Pham Hanni is still in a somewhat relationship with Jungwon.

Hanni doesn’t know why watching Y/N laughing and being playful with her coworker makes her heart hurt. She has Jungwon but why does her heart scream for the girl that has been ignoring her for almost a week. How she wishes that she could run into her arms and kiss her, but now she’s watching her leaning towards her coworker with ash gray hair that she believes is the sweetest barista but in her eyes it's someone who wants Park Y/N.

“You’re really playing with fire, Y/NN.”

“Unnie, let’s just see if she’ll do something with her feelings,”

Park Y/N, look at what you’ve done to me. Is this what they call jealousy? If it is, Pham Hanni hates it.

She hates that she’s falling for Park Y/N.

[fantasyinvader]

I’ve been thinking about Sothis lately.

As I’ve said before, the terms used in the Japanese version of her S support in Flower isn’t “the stone in your chest is no more.” It’s “the stone in your chest has shattered,” and how this takes on another meaning when you realize said stone is her heart and contains her soul. She’s saying that your actions in Flower, ultimately culminating in helping Edelgard kill Rhea, break her heart to the point she unfuses with Byleth. She leaves behind the gremlin and disappears, while Hopes keeps hinting that she can get herself a new body to return with a vengeance. This was also the Sothis who sacrificed herself for Byleth, giving up her own existence so that Byleth could escape the shadow realm.

That last detail takes on another meaning with the fact that her Crest Stone holds her soul, and the last body it was in was Sitri, Byleth’s mother. Sitri wasn’t some poor soul whose body Rhea made to house Sothis, Sitri was Sothis but like the gremlin didn’t have her memories as Sothis. She never recovered them, instead living her own life which included falling in love with Jeralt and giving her heart in order to save a stillborn Byleth.

In Hopes, if Jeralt dies Sothis loses it, taking control of Byleth and attempting to kill Shez. The man she loved in her past life, a past life she has all the memories of by the time of Hopes, died and she loses herself to grief. This is supposedly the bad version of the route, where the Agarthans won over her. In the regular Houses timeline, Sothis didn’t have those memories and was able to process his death in a more healthy way.

Now link the Sothis who snaps when Jeralt is killed, and the Sothis who believes killing Rhea as reason enough to leave Byleth behind.

In Scarlet Blaze and Verdant Wind, Rhea is made out to be the bad guy according to Edelgard and Claude respectively. But if Sothis lives in Scarlet Blaze, after Rhea’s death Edelgard and Claude go on to conquer the kingdom for themselves. Getting rid of Rhea was a pretense, and we still have the fact that the ideals Edelgard’s spreading are counter to Sothis’s own teachings as well as the game makes it clear Edelgard oppresses her people. Likewise, Claude and his army didn’t know Rhea was the Immaculate One, her dragon form was a surprise to everyone. Sothis would have found herself facing her daughter, and that route ends a lot more ambiguously. The name Golden Wildfire suggests that things go out of control for Claude, as he pissed off a number of factions in the process of pursuing his goals. The Agarthans are still around too. Then Azure Gleam, Claude plans on eliminating Rhea when the time is right despite being her ally.

The “good” endings to Hopes, in light of all this, would indicate that Sothis gets pissed and comes back at some point because of Rhea’s death. It could possibly be similar to her snapping when Jeralt dies, and this would also happen following Flower. Really, the best endings for SB and GW are the paths where you kill Byleth, because Sothis is killed in those routes seemingly for good. No fear of her coming back for revenge. Dimitri’s the only one with a shot of not being in her crosshairs, as while he might agree with Claude privately he recognizes the danger Claude’s actions pose to the people and he will help those hurt by them. Dimitri’s support with Claude really spells out that for all of Claude’s insistence that things need to change, his reckless pursuit of change will be his undoing as things go out of control.

The thing is though, Byleth following in Sothis’s footsteps and becoming a mother figure to Fodlan and that’s meant to be a good thing. It’s the ending to the route the game’s worldbuilding was done around, Byleth’s route. Honestly, I think the jokes about her being worst mom because of how she treats Rhea miss the point. It’s clear she’s supposed to love her daughter in the Japanese text, to the point of abandoning her other child over her death. The ending of Flower is her showing how much she loves Rhea and how much of a screwup Byleth ended up being as a result. Hopes just gives us an idea of what’s going to happen down the line.

[frutiylaris]

I would say just using lexicanim for research and not reading the novels is bad too. First it's your job read the books you all get audible sponsors come one. Second of all the lexicanim gets some stuff wrong. I'm a fantasy fan and god it's a bit of a mess. Some End times stuff is missing, this

The character has nothing to do with the von carsteins. He's just happen to have the same first name.

Some of the roleplay books aren't there

Somehow the fandom wiki is better than it. Links to the book and pages. Includes the different timelines, the roleplay books, warning for stuff that are offensive. Well for the major elephant in the room. No warning for Araby page (the lore can be yikes sometimes espically from older books) or the forest goblins (the offensiveness of the forest goblins is because of their design)

That a have books emotions. Little parts that you can think about.

This is true! And is one of the major reasons why lexicanum is often derided, legitimately so, to repeat. However said critcism should also acknowledge that the Lexicanum bases itself off wikipedia and suffers the same faults because of it. There is a saying, I believe it is 80% make submissions only 20% check and correct, something to that effect. This just a problem of sourcing and I, myself, got a lexi account so I could help clear up some the clutter because I try to base myself off Subsourian, the "acclaimed" lore master for starcraft 2 who is hopelessly dedicated. Its also why I have this!

This is 50 gigabytes worth of warhammer stuff from just the rulebooks, codices etc. I have other novels and such collected in an seperate folder and as I type this I am busy going through the Horus Heresy and have reached book 13. But I'm re-reading 11-12 because someone asked for citations from them. The issue is a lot more complicated than just "Read more" because you'd be shocked how much info conflicts and what may potentially sound plausible but is in fact bogus. I ask you kindly re-read before asking a question because I'm a bit confused on what you mean and a comma or two could help me better understand. STILL! it is a valid concern to have and one of the many hurdles of teaching Warhammer lore regardless of fantasy or 40K. Like any source one must be skeptical of the information within it and fact check it. My primary issue with fandom is that it doesn't have what I refer to as "citation" markers. Because a picture from a book will have its citation listed next to a excerpt from a book and there is no indication of which is which. This makes research more painful and I've had, in my experience mind you, some pages have fanon spouted as fact and it does near-irreversable damage. Most people read the wiki wholesale because what I'm doing is uh... to say the least going through things with a fine toothed comb and trying to simplify it down for people to get a better understanding. There will be some errors, I try to avoid them and keep as up to date as possible, but GW doesn't help because certain books are no longer in print or physical only. Imperial Munitorum Manual comes to mind as a loathed source because it was released as a joint background book alongside the infantry's uplifting primer to which their is only resellers... I am not paying 750$ for it. I think thats understandable. This is also a reason why I show citations in my video, and though I wanted to do a hierachy of sources, that idea crumpled. I give page numbers, and work off what I gather. Lexi and Fandom are both "Good" sources it more so matters how one goes about their research. And I do agree Lexicanum could have some form of warning system but given a look at their backgrounds... I don't think they believe in having such a thing for one reason or another which is another nail in their coffin. Regardless, thank you for the question, I suppose criticism? Its a bit difficult to tell, and stick around because I'm trying my best to unfuck 37 years worth of spaghetti lore and make it digestable in a fun and interesting way. I'll keep it in mind and triple-check everything.

[cecekeating]

My 613 Jordayla Analysis and Commentary pt 2

We see the parents' theme again in this episode through the gifts given to Jordayla by Olivia and Laura. Loved the gift Olivia gave to Jordan and their sibling banter. It was super sweet and MikeSam always deliver with Baker twin moments. Them gossiping about Luke and Olivia organizing that prank had me laughing hard.

Laura’s gift to Layla was super sweet. Not only were the diamonds blue, a sweet callback to Billy and his fav color by the way, it was from her mother’s wedding necklace. So Layla had her something blue, old and borrowed. Very thoughtful on Laura’s part and also a fantastic callback to prom where Laura helped her with her earrings and they talked about her mom. Also, I just realized in the prom episode, Layla was missing her mom which was exactly what happened on her wedding day! I have always wanted a moment where Laura tells Layla that she doesn’t have to call her Mrs Baker anymore - I was kicking my feet when I eventually got to hear this. Again, we have Laura alluding to Layla having her own little girl - this is really making me think that the writing may actually explore a motherhood arc with her as a girl mom. I didn’t think so before but I am open to that possibility now. 

Now let’s talk about JP and Layla. I know some citizens of Jordayla nation were actually opposed to the idea of JP walking Layla down the aisle but hear me out. I know JP Keating wasn’t the best of dads but one thing I will give to him is how he wanted the best for Layla especially as she grew older. He clocked Jordayla at that dinner she hosted in 412 and he encouraged her to open her heart. Say what you want to say about JP but I always consider that moment to be key in Jordayla’s arc. If he didn’t say anything, she wouldn’t have made that call to Jordan.

We see him come through again for Jordayla in 420 when he encourages Layla to stop using work to hide from something that scares her and in 517 when he talks to her about balance. Each time he talks to Layla, it brings Jordayla closer. Even in 401, he trusted Jordan to check on Layla by himself. Quite poetic that in that episode, Layla told him she would be safe with Jordan and well, here we are.  If you also pay attention to the Jordayla arc, he is actually the parent woven in strongly into their love story, as opposed to Billy and Laura. So I think it was fab to see him there and I loved that we got to see her dance with him. Even if it was for a little bit. 

Loved the moment Jordan shared with Laura and GW. If you pay attention to the conversation, they gave Jordan pieces of marital advice. We didn’t see that for Layla. Again, using my writer’s brain, this may mean the writing will likely explore Jordan’s identity as a husband and leader of a home. This can be a whole arc on its own or it can be tied to him being a father. Having Laura and GW give him advice may mean they would likely be his support system. Like I said, this is the writer's brain talking, if it makes no sense to you, throw it out.

Then let’s talk about the moment they became husband and wife. Having the moment be a comical moment is very Jordayla. Remember, they are the light ship of the show and I think their theme is about joy and young love. So their wedding having moments of jokes and laughter is on brand and spot on. 

Spencer told no lies with his speech. Jordayla’s love is worth the wait. Jordan had to wait from middle school until freshman homecoming to get his first kiss with Layla. He waited for her to be his girlfriend, waited for her to be ready for them to go public, waited for her to be ready for sex. Even in this season 6, Jordan waited for her to go through her recovery process in her own time and pace. The love of Jordan that is immensely patient is why Jordayla is where they are today. 

We also have Spencer alluding to them sticking through tough moments. Again, this season was proof and evidence of how regardless of how messy life is, Jordayla will never give up on each other. Again, Spencer in his speech brought in Monica and Billy - The parent theme continues again. I got my wedding kiss and I got them exchange rings - full circle moment from 504. I am not mad at all.

More in part three

[kateisgonnabeperfect]

Today is April 28th, 2024 and my name is Katelynn and I am holding myself accountable. im not letting myself fail myself anymore.

its not even about food

its about having the discipline and self-control to be able to get to the goal ive always so desperately wanted and then keep it.

its the only way i’ll be happy.

i cant give up now or let myself have anymore set-backs or be stuck, ive put in too much hard work to fuck it all up or stop now.

i never want to lose control or be fat again. in anyways shape or form.

so not only am i gonna push myself to do my best im gonna stop letting the temptation of food get to me.

food is a mere sacrifice, i’d rather be disciplined and say no and feel kinda bummed for maybe 2 seconds than continue living in a body i so desperately hate.

living in a body suffocated in fat.

not being able to have friends because i know that all they notice is the fat on my body and i can FEEL it.

always being played and treated like crap because how could you love a fat fuck ???

but i will not let myself be a fat fuck anymore or ever again.

i wont binge.

i wont purge because i wont have too.

i’ll ⭐️ ve.

i dont care if its hard or if it hurts.

i’ll prove to myself and everyone that i can indeed be thin and stay thin for the rest of my life.

i dont even necessarily care about missing out on food or stuff because in the grand scheme of things is food actually worth it?

no, it’s only a necessity; you eat to live you dont live to eat.

and im tired of the gluttony.

im tired of being the fat girl.

im tired of seeing all that fat everytime i look in the mirror.

im tired of overeating and being a slave to food.

so im accepting that even though food might always be around me, that i myself have the discipline and SELF RESPECT for myself to not give in. And accepting that it’s not a punishment, eating it would be and I dont want to punish myself anymore.

especially because college starts soon.

i have so much time on my hands and im going to dedicate it all to weight loss and cultivating a plan and mindset that will not only help me lose the reat of this weight but then keep it off.

and im tired of eating like shit.

im tired of being fat in everyway. everything about it is horrible.

i NEED to get down to 70lbs and then stay 70lbs.

i’ve always wanted to be thinner, ive always wanted to take up less space, to be seen as a person and not a tub of lard. to be wanted and appreciated and feel confident in my body.

4n4 is quite literally my savior, without her i’d be a waste of life. i’d be NOTHING.

so i’m gonna keep updating you guys about my weight loss and what i eat/consume. my calorie intake and my workouts.

i know ⭐️ving is hard, and the temptation of food is hard as a fatty but i wont let myself be a fatty.

the consequences of giving in and not staying disciplined is far worse than the sacrifice of eating something “good”

so here are my stats!

CW:100lbs

GW: 95lbs

GW:90lbs

GW:85lbs

GW:80lbs

GW:75lbs

UGW:70lbs

i dont “deserve” food. i owe it to myself to say no and just suck it up so i can finally be happy and stop hating myself.

and when i get to my UGW i will make sure i fucking maintain it so i never have to live in a body i hate again.

is it going to take time? fuck yeah. is it going to be hard? yes.

am i going to make sure i do it before college starts? fuck yeah.

[wkakadrac]

Crossposting some Night Lords musings

Some rambling in relation to 40K / 30K [Predominantly around the Night Lords Legion] below the cut-off.

Art from 3rd Edition Chaos Space Marines Codex / Index Astartes.

Something I have come to consider a disappointment of sorts is the missed potential when it comes to the Night Lords Legion.

On one hand, they fill a niche that is absolutely needed to drive home the horrors of the Imperium of Man. Even with the most generous interpretations of the Emperor and his Great Crusade, you have an unsightly blemish in the form of the Night Lords being a useful bunch of self-serving monsters that the Emperor tolerated / was willing to entertain a blindspot for as long as he could pretend Curze wasn't That Bad and they got results. And again that's with the most generous interpretations: The Emperor unintentionally making a Leopards Eating People's Faces While The People Are Still Alive Legion and and tolerating it out of pragmatism. The more common / neutral implication being that he absolutely knew what they were doing [wanted them doing it, no less!] and signed off on it because they shaved a couple years off the Crusade atrocities be damned. The worst that he didn't care whatsoever about it and the only reason the Night Lords were abnormal was that they merely didn't pretend to be what they aren't.

This is a vital niche to fill when it comes to displaying the fucked up society that is the IoM and how even in its "Golden Age" there was stinking shit beneath that veneer of gold. You just... don't get it, for most of the other Legions. Especially in newer lore. GW has spent a bunch of effort to try and make the other Legio more 'human' [despite them being post-human galactic conquerors]. Especially with GW reducing so many other baddies into "lol it was Chaos / possession / insanity". The IoM needs something to have been a terrible blemish that cannot be conveniently blamed on Chaos or One Bad Apple Spoiling The Rest [Curze, quite explicitly, hates his Legion, and in many cases the feeling's mutual outside a respect for his capacity to do and enabling of Horrible Things].

But on the other hand. On the other hand. It writes itself: Really? Really? We are supposed to take it at face value that Nostramans are just built different, pay no mind to the sheer coincidence the moment Curze ceded Nostramo to the Emperor's Great Crusade they slid immediately back into the same lopsided government he had overthrown, and that The Administratum Couldn't Do Anything About It the inequalities just rapidly reasserted themselves crime magically skyrocketed after the removal of one single person, and on top of this the Societal Undesirables just coincidentally kept filtering into the Legion?

You have a world - no, I apologize: Explicitly an entire system: Night Lord lore explicitly mentioned in the old Index Astartes how he found out from a system's prosperity soaring - that in the span of a singular generation had its inequalities removed by the removal of every single despot that Curze didn't think he could press his thumb down on hard enough to play nice in the new system, and with Curze's removal the Administratum... magically couldn't do the same job as one person to keep at least one star system from falling back into the same groups' hands? And for that matter practically everyone that system recruited after the first generation was a bunch of horrific baby-eating self-serving murdering societal rejects who had no concern for anyone beyond He Himself And Him?

While 40K absolutely needs somebody to show that the Great Crusade's shit stunk too, that it was an interstellar bunch of murderers and ne'erdowells draped in the legitimacy and glory of a gilded despot, there was just as much potential to use them as a stepping stone of "Gee. It sure is convenient that the Imperium Did Its Best but Some People Are Just So Bad that despite giving them everything they could have ever wanted they still bit the hand that fed them". Or, for that matter, to introduce Traitor Marines who are just. Like. People who grew up watching their star system abolish economic and social inequalities. Dared to buy into the hype of such spreading through the galaxy. And then watched everything crumble around them. With stark division between those whom this broke, those who in desperation [for better or worse] threw their lot in with the Chaotic Powers... and those who just keep the legend of the original Night Haunter alive. Astartes who prowl the edges of Imperial Space and just.... topple the Noble Houses. Convince planets to throw off the yoke of Imperial Rule, whether in good faith or even just to try and make ever more fires for the IoM to have to put out [and thus increasing the odds of something slipping through the cracks or the inadequacies of the system catching up with it].

Adding onto this with some musings from other posts I fully understand that Curze's brutality was brought about by excessive and violent terror. Even the most benign interpretations of his rule over Nostramo pitch him as a murderous vigilante prone to violent fits. But that's fine! There's layers to how somebody like Curze could still call out the Emperor and other Great Crusade's architects / 'greatest' participants precisely and accurately. How Corax seemingly [in newer lore] likewise abandoned their revolutionary leans and within a matter of generations was actively reinforcing Deliverance's former system of exploitation, the two really being mirrors / foils for one another. Works have already established that Curze hates what he and his Legion have become [that the feeling is mutual] and that whatever noble intentions he might have had at any one point he's just as deserving of an executioner's blade well before the Heresy.

I guess I'm just disappointed that the Night Lords were reduced to a singular, unironic and straight-faced hat while every other Legion is given kiddy gloves to go "And that's why Chaos ruined everything". It diminishes the horrors of the Great Crusade, goes uncomfortable places with the idea of Some People Are Just Born Criminal And It Can Be Measurably Tracked In The Genome, and removes the potential for several thematic hooks.

[anabon3s]

Starting a blog: AUGUST 23

My names Lottie, I’m 20 years old and as in my first post I’m new to tumblr but not 3D!!

(I’ll pin this post)

For tumblr legal purposes

I am not PRO A4A, AGAINST RECOVEY or FAT-PHOBIC!!!!

Read or don’t read, follow or don’t follow, scroll on or don’t scroll on. BUT please don’t report, PLEASE PLEASE!!!! BLOCK me if you don’t like what I feel the need to share. THIS IS WHO I AM and this is my only outlet to people who understand and feel how I feel with no judgment or hesitation to help me feel less alone in this dark and lonely illness.

About me 😊

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I am 20 and relapsing for the 100th time through this bumpy gravel road (not really but it’s been on and off). I first got diagnosed when I was 14 and have had the best ups and downs of my life so far on it. I hate being ana (life is fucked up on this road and really we all know it deep down) but weirdly it is the only comfort I have now… earlier on this year (feb/March it’s unclear even to me) I relapsed into the worst state I’ve been in since I first got diagnosed.

Because I was seeing a GP for an already existing health condition since I was 12yo, I got “caught” pretty early on. Little to my knowledge, not so lucky for me (or lucky, you choose) my GP was “specialised” in 3D’s… ffs 🤦‍♀️

Since my diagnosis (being a minor family got involved against my choices early on). My family have been so hit and miss with holding me accountable, sometimes nothing can slip through the cracks for weeks and others I feel like they just “forgot” , “gave up” or “just don’t give a fuck” for literally months… BUT they hold me accountable to going to my GP appointments REGULARLY no matter what my weight or physical/mental health is like at the time 🙄

STATS:

HEIGHT: 156cm (5.1ft)

SW: 59kg (130lbs)

CW: 40kg (88lbs)

GW: 34kg (75lbs)

I’ve been through the highs and the lows of this illness (physically, weight wise and emotionally) I promise, I understand pretty much all sides and angles of it, most likely I’ve been through them my self :(

This is the long way of saying, I am open to sharing my journey from here, it is a lonely, dark journey a lot of us have not voluntarily taken part of but are stuck in for an unknown chunk of time for our lives!!!

I am always open for messages, chats, rants, questions or friendships! Just shoot the text and I’ll reply :)

[thenationaltreasuregazette]

ND for NT? Neurodivergence in National Treasure

(Abigail Chase Edition) -- Pt 2

Last time we started looking at how Abigail compares to Rudy Simone's list of questions about Autism in women & other high maskers.

Now we'll do the other two parts.

Part 3 “Emotions/Physical”

→ Emotionally immature and emotionally sensitive

Sensitive, perhaps. Immature? She seems to be handling the breakup much more maturely than Ben.

→ Anxiety and fear are predominant emotions

Not seeing this in canon.

→ More open to talking about feelings and emotional issues than males with AS

Maybe? She is the one to press on the "why are you like this?" question in the dressing room.

→ Strong sensory issues - sounds, sights, smells, touch, and prone to overload. (Less likely to have taste/food textures issues as males)

The best case I can make for this is probably the Reading Terminal Market chase scene. She immediately hides somewhere cool and quiet (behind the meat counter). Then she gets jump-scared by Riley when she’s hiding in the flowers.

→ Moody and prone to bouts of depression. May have been diagnosed as bipolar or manic depressive (common comorbids of autism/AS) while the AS diagnosis was missed

No canon evidence.

→ Probably given several different prescriptions to treat symptoms. Will be very sensitive to medications and anything else she puts in her body so may have had adverse reactions

No canon evidence.

→ 9 out of 10 have mild to severe gastrointestinal difficulties  - e.g. ulcers, acid reflux, IBS, etc.

No canon evidence, but this would be interesting!

→ Stims to soothe when sad or agitated: rocking, face-rubbing, humming, finger-flicking, leg bouncing, finger or foot-tapping, etc.

No? Riley does more of this than anyone else in the group.

→ Similarly physical when happy: hand flapping, clapping, singing, jumping, running around, dancing, bouncing

Not really? Even when they find the treasure she’s pretty still.

→ Prone to temper or crying meltdowns, even in public, sometimes over seemingly small things due to sensory or emotional overload

Not that we see.

→ Hates injustice and hates to be misunderstood; this can incite anger and rage

You could consider her rift with Ben in BoS as part of this.

→ Prone to mutism when stressed or upset, esp. after a meltdown. Less likely to stutter than male counterparts but may have a raspy voice, monotone at times, when stressed or sad

She can come across as a little monotone, but that could also be the combo of her accent and personality.

Part 4: “Social Relationships”

→ Words and actions are often misunderstood by others

Well they’re definitely misunderstood by Ben, but that might be a Ben problem.

→ Perceived to be cold-natured and self-centered; unfriendly

Yes. See “mean Declaration lady”

→ Is very outspoken at times, may get fired up when talking about passions/obsessive interests

Ask her about Thomas Jefferson I dare you. In all seriousness, I think the way she thanks Ben at the gala is pretty indicative of this. Her close-to-the-vest composure evaporates when she admits in a rather youthful, indulgent way that she’s keeping the GW button because she “really wants it.”

→ Can be very shy or mute

Ben and the henchmen all think she talks a lot but I think she’s just, like…a woman who dares to have an opinion on the high stakes situation she’s involved in?

→ Like her male counterpart, will shut down in social situations once overloaded, but is generally better at socializing in small doses. May even give the appearance of skilled, but it is a ‘performance’

I will cite the gala again.

→ Doesn’t go out much. Will prefer to go out with partner only or children if she has them

We never meet anyone that she’s close to other than her assistant (work friend) and Stan (work enemy). So very possibly true.

→ Will not have many girlfriends and will not do ‘girly’ things like shopping with them or get-togethers to ‘hang-out’

We never see Abigail close to any women outside of work. She’s close enough with her assistant to gripe about Stan, and she knows the event planner by name. We also see her interact with Emily, but they seem cordial, not like they’re getting brunch on the weekends. Other than that its dates (whats-his-face from Book of Secrets) and business meetings (Mitch) with men.

Lol National Treasure does not even come close to passing the Bechdel Test

→ Will have a close friend or friends in school, but not once adulthood is reached

See above, until Ben and Riley.

→ May or may not want to have a relationship. If she is in a relationship, she probably takes it very seriously but she may choose to remain celibate or alone

I will refer you to the deep dive on Ben and Abigail’s relationship for more detailed analysis, but yeah I’d say Abigail takes their relationship seriously. Actually, I think it’s because she takes it seriously that she leaves Ben when he’s not respecting her input. Also, my personal headcanon is that it took Abigail almost the entire time between discovering the treasure and the “Three months later” scene to actually warm up to the idea of dating Ben. She does not strike me as someone who starts relationships easily or casually. I think it would take a lot more than a kiss in the catacombs to convince her to take that leap.

→ Due to sensory issues, will either really enjoy sex or strongly dislike it

Umm…all I can say to this is that National Treasure is a very sexless movie. (Which is fine by me lmao) Ben and Abigail’s flirtation is much more intellectual than physical.

→ If she likes a male, she can be extremely, noticeably awkward in her attempts to let him know, e.g. she may stare when she sees him or call him repeatedly. This is because she fixates and doesn’t understand social gender roles. This will change with maturity

I think Abigail is on the other side of this, so it's hard to say what she used to be like.

→ Often prefers the company of animals but not always due to sensory issues

I don’t consider Edge of History a particularly reputable source of canon, but I'll allow the dog.

Conclusion

Hmm, Abigail was knocking it out of the neurodiversity park on the two categories in Part 1. Here she's more middle of the road.

While there were a few strong "yes"s, there's also just so much we don't know about her personal life and her past. As with Ben, we only get to spend time with Abigail during the two most chaotic weeks of her life.

In short, I think there is plenty of fodder for reading Abigail as Autistic. For me personally, I take to that reading more easily than Ben. In any case, there is so much here for fics and headcanons.

What are some of your favs?

What did I miss?

[dragonsarecats]

I definitely agree that the sway of Byleth as a lot of weight for SS! But I don't think it's the only important factor? Because to me if it was the case, Claude and Dimitri would have their own SS: the fact that it's specific to Edelgard do seems means something about the Eagles loyalty toward her.

Edelgard don't feel betrayed in Silver Snow nor did she trusted the other Eagles? Can you give specific dialog? To me Silver Snow, at least regarding Byleth and other student is kinda just what she expected to happen?

I do think the Hubert point has to be nuanced: Hubert is only one person in Edelgard huge lack of positive relationship, and more widely Edelgard truly awful situation. Edelgard is constantly watched by her abuser, she has to constantly worry that people she met could very much be TWSITD agent, ... Yes, she has someone to rely on but comparatively she has countless ennemies on her track ( unlike Claude who has mostly potential enemy, or indirect ennemies that have in no way the same weight as TWSITD or Aegir for example ). So yeah, while Claude and Edelgard trust issue are different in certain ways, I don't think Claude trust issue can be a point as to why found family is a fundamental trope of VW and not of CF?

For the inherent respect as a leader I'm sorry to have missed what you meant! But while you're right that Claude as the thoughest situation, the other lord don't take the respect as granted? The role of Emperor is now a puppet leader and the Prime Minister is supposed to hold the true power, Edelgard certainly does have to work for the respect and the amount of power she has in CF: she has to rely on TWSITD and make alliance with Caspar and Linhardt father for example. Even Dimitri who clearly has the best position of the three when it comes to natural respect has the whole Rufus affair!

For Ferdinand a the reason behind him being rival who don't litteraly seek to take her power, it's because he already has power over her so I don't think it's necessarily a strong point? Because of the insurrection, she's the puppet leader, he's the one with the actual power. And Edelgard noble connection are small and actually very unimpactful. Especially compared to Dimitri who has his actual group of childhood friend and adoptive fathers

How is Edelgard not inherently untrusting compared to Claude and Hubert? I mean, they made a choice to give one lord the line about being so untrusful they can't even trust themselves, they made SB about the hardship of trusting unlike GW where Claude surprisingly trust Shez to some extent quickly? I genuinely don't see how she has less trust issue, or at least less deep, and to me it kinda wouldn't make sense with her backstory ( especially on the Hubert comparison )?

I'm sorry for all the misunderstanding too, I hope I'm not too rude- And really if my ask bother you or take too much time to respond I really won't mind if you don't respond ^^" Thanks you for taking your time in any case

First of all anon, let's clear something up! I ADORE your asks! You're not rude at all, I really, genuinely enjoy disagreeing with you, if that makes sense? You're clearly super passionate about Three Houses and talking about this game with someone who is super passionate is really fun for me! And don't worry about how long it takes me to respond to you lol--which is very ironic considering this response took nearly twenty days when I normally reply within eight hours (finals hit hard D:) --because I love doing it! You're genuinely a bright spot in my day!

Now, to the rest of your ask!

So for me, the reason why Claude and Dimitri don't have a "Silver Snow", as you put it, is because thematically they don't really "need" one. The type of conflict dealt with by Claude and Dimitri both personally and politically doesn't require an additional route to explore, and also, Silver Snow is much more the Church route then it is the oppositional-Edelgard route. I think Silver Snow branches from Edelgard's route because that's the most interesting place to put it. As personally as Dimitri's route gets with Edelgard, he isn't her true opposition; Rhea is.

And thus for me, the Silver Snow route says much more about Rhea, Edelgard, Seteth, and Byleth, then it does the Eagles. I definitely think it says something about the Eagles-- that they don't appreciate Edelgard's methodology and could be convinced to opposed her (and have mixed feelings about them) puts them in a very similar boat to Claude, who is most frequently compared with Edelgard. However, when removed from the context of SS/CF (and thus, recruitment ignored, away from Byleth's influence), all of them do show up at Edelgard's side, and are willing to die for her. I think, similarly to the other routes, their relationships are different and more strained, but ultimately without the influence of Byleth they are loyal to Edelgard (and the Empire) in a way that can't be ignored.

"Edelgard don't feel betrayed in Silver Snow nor did she trusted the other Eagles? Can you give specific dialog? To me Silver Snow, at least regarding Byleth and other student is kinda just what she expected to happen?"

No, you're absolutely correct here, I definitely misspoke. If I were to try and correct what I said...I don't think Edelgard felt betrayed by the other Eagles, but perhaps, disappointed? It's a conclusion I come to from seeing her in CF more than anything else, frankly, because (and I'll elaborate on this a few paragraphs down), I see Edelgard as a very desperate person. She is desperate to trust even as she views everyone with suspicion, two traits that seem more diametrically opposed then they really are.

Go back into trust issues (and the leadership points), I think there is no "better" or "worse" when comparing Edelgard and Claude's trust issues, just "different." Edelgard's trust issues cause her to put on a front of suspicion, but it's not a strong one. This is the result of two things: her trauma, and Hubert. Edelgard has a peer she can trust anything and everything with (and this is a good thing for her), and that includes vetting people. Even with the Professor, Edelgard grows fond of her quickly, and begins to trust her (implied by game mechanics to really, really start at C+ but also scene in other routes the fondness really does carry), but Hubert holds off on Byleth until she makes that critical choice to go against the church. This to me symbolizes a sort of "safety" net that Edelgard has with Hubert? Further on her relationship with Byleth, Edelgard's trauma does result in her putting on a front of suspicion (which makes it no less apart of her, but rather something she deliberately does to protect herself), but I think Edelgard is just desperate for someone to reach out to her.

I haven't talked about this before, but I think one of the things that highlights the differences between Edelgard and Claude and also their trust level, is the concept of "adults." This affects Dimitri as well, but as a "rule" in three houses if something majorly affects two house leaders it affects the third in less dramatic/major ways. That is to say, that while Edelgard has never had an adult/authority figure she could rely on, Claude has. And while Claude has never had the ability to rely on a peer, she has. Edelgard removes the old guard almost completely when she rises to power, only compromising, as you said, with Lindhardt and Caspar's parents. She replaces everyone she can't rely one with people she can rely on, because she's learned the hard way through what happened to her and her family. Claude, on the other hand, had his parents. They raised him to be self sufficient and to survive in a world that hated him. Later, Claude had his grandfather, and now has Judith and Nader (who trained him in childhood). He had no peers and no friends until he arrives at the Academy. As a result, Claude simply...lives with the discomfort. He deals with the reverse of what Edelgard went through; instead of living with people who have harmed you, he experienced harm from other people and now is forced to be around people who think the same way and thus could harm him in the future. Whereas Edelgard clears out the rot and only compromises where she has to, Claude is a being of compromise. It's not just that he distrusts others, it's that others fundamentally distrust him.

Edelgard's place as the next Emperor is never in doubt. It just isn't. What really shows this off to me, is the silver snow cutscene in which the flame emperor is blatantly backtalking to the Agarthans! Talking about how she doesn't approve of what they've doing and how they're going to pay--to me it was really effective at showing off how well they were at manipulating her because there is a reason Edelgard goes after the Church first and not the people responsible for her own personal tragedy. It's never in doubt in the Crimson Flower route that Edelgard will be Emperor. She never doubts it. To better compare her and Dimitri to Claude--he's basically a bastard to the Alliance. Sure, Edelgard is at risk of being undermined and turned into a puppet leader, but the fact that she will be that leader is objectively not up for debate. Edelgard is not afraid of the people in the Empire (non-Agarthan) who caused the coup, and she's relatively easily able to steamroll over them. Edelgard has stability in her place in the world--her place has been custom made, after all, as the only survivor of her siblings. In a way, it's also what makes her such a tragic figure--she has a lot less agency in her route then it feels because she's trying to make the best out of a bad situation.

Claude, on the other hand, is implied to be in a very precarious position. He can't pull off the stuff Edelgard does because Edelgard is an absolute monarch in a similar way to Dimitri. She is the Emperor and Dimitri is the King. Claude is the head of the von Reigan house, but the constant pressure and presence of Lorenz combined with Holtz's looming (if pleasant) figure in the background shows to the player that Claude is objectively replaceable. It's why his ultimate strategy during the time skip is to stall, to take advantage of the lack of unification in the Alliance (the lack of unification under him), in order to keep the Empire's eyes off of his people for the longest period possible.

So I think their trust issues are fundamentally different despite how similar Claude and Edelgard are!

Before I go to that, though, I'd like to address Ferdinand. That man has absolutely no power over Edelgard lol. Their support chain honestly makes me feel a little bad for him? The other two rivals--Lorenz and Felix--get deeper, more meaningful resolutions with their Lords but to me, personally, it feels like Ferdinand just accepts that Edelgard is better than him and becomes humble in a way that feels almost self-depreciating (esp. in their line progression if you have them pull weeds together the whole run, like me and my friend lol). Ferdinand has no idea about the coup, and he's a rather oblivious character--he believes it's his job to keep Edelgard in check, and he is only allowed to be Prime Minister because when she ousted his father, she chose to keep him there. Edelgard has so much power over Ferdinand it's crazy--both personal and political--and I don't necessarily think they have a "bad" relationship or anything I just think that Ferdinand has self esteem issues, lol, and weighs his own worth against hers which she isn't responsible for. I think you're underestimating Edelgard here--while Dimitri does have a lot of personal and political connections, so does she! There's a reason she's able to almost instantly obliterate the old guard, and that's because she has replacements like Ladislava and Randolph waiting in the wings. She's also able to keep on nobles like Lindhardt and Caspar's father's. Edelgard is a very powerful character, I think it just feels otherwise sometimes because she's so deeply affected by what happened to her as a child (as she should be) and unlike Dimitri it doesn't make her large and imposing if that makes sense.

Edelgard is jaded in a way Claude is not. I did not mean to make it seem like she was trusting because she absolutely tries not to be. Her trust issues are bone deep, and comparing her and Claude as "more" or "less" was not something I intended to do, it's just that they manifest differently. What they each want from people they could potentially trust is different: Edelgard is desperate to have someone reach out their hand to her, and Claude is desperate for someone not to slap his away when he does. Edelgard is drowning in the same way Dimitri is, emotionally. The Hubert thing was less of a comparison and more of an example of why Edelgard wants to trust someone so bad and appears to "slip" more than Claude does with her mask even though hers is a lot more obvious partially because she has Hubert. She does not have to do all her vetting herself, and I think that's very good for her.

I think the reason for me, why found family seems to be a much bigger theme in Verdant Wind then Crimson Flower, is again, partially because of the power structure less inherent in the Golden Deer house. Lorenz is visibly worn down over time through conversation with Leonie (our queen!) about commoners, and despite everything about Claude being inherently political, the Golden Deer manage to be peers in a way no one else is, because let's be real, Claude is an equal to the other nobles the way Edelgard and Dimitri can't be. It doesn't make him closer to the others--Hubert calls Edelgard only ever by respectful titles and I think if they were any closer they'd merge into a single soul lmao--but it puts him on a more level playing field. Mr. Leader Man is treated with a lot more humor than grandiosity, and characters like Leonie and Raphael really do result in the Golden Deer all feeling like they're equals even if you're conscious that they aren't. This, for me, makes it feel a lot more explicit when you get your found family forming, because in a big big way, it's forming completely from scratch. There's almost no real positive relationship between any of the Deer when the game starts! And I'm including Raph and Ignatz in it because of Ignatz's massive guilt! It makes that development very tangible, because it almost doesn't feel like a natural progression. For me, the theme is so prominent because it's about the formation of found family, although I think you could definitely argue that other routes have other aspects of found family more prominent.

I'm so sorry this took me so long anon!! Know I've been slowly working on this and thinking of you, lol!

[carriesthewind]

This poll inspired me to listen to the podcast Sold a Story and holy cow do I recommend it (especially if you live in America, although possibly also England or Australia). It's about the current failures of reading education in the United States, and how and why schools have been using a debunked method to try (and fail) to teach kids to read for decades. (one of the the things it didn't touch on, and that I am now very curious about, is if learning to read is different with writing systems that are more heavily based on logographies, rather than syllabaries or alphabets (note: I only speak English and know very little about languages or language acquisition so that might be a stupid question)).

And one of the things that I really like about it, as a liberal/progressive/lefty person, is how it demonstrates how people who share my general beliefs and political opinions can (and were) seduced into believing a lot of very wrong things and going completely against science: from the democrat who was skeptical of a method because it was being pushed by GW Bush as part of No Child Left Behind; to the black teacher who was sure that the white suburban schools, with all their resources, must be using methods proven to give their kids the best education (spoiler: she realizes it was all just aesthetics and the parents were hiring private tutors: the answer was just money); to the progressive educators who are highly skeptical of the hierarchy and rigidity of "traditional" phonics education; hell, even to the basics of the assumption that more books + more autonomy for kids must = better (...and miss that even if those things are good and necessary, you can't ignore the context that they are being provided in). A very good listen for reminding myself to look to where my own biases and assumptions may be tripping me up and leading me down a wrong path.

[princeofgod-2021]

LIGHT OF LIFE 299

John 1:4

UNITY OF THE BODY 2 – UNITED WITH CHRIST THRU DEATH

Eph 4:2-3 Be humble and gentle in every way. Be patient with each other and lovingly accept each other. THROUGH THE PEACE THAT TIES YOU TOGETHER, DO YOUR BEST TO MAINTAIN THE UNITY THAT THE SPIRIT GIVES. GW

Before we get to inspect how Tradition demeans Unity, let’s look a little further into the “way of Unity”.

Joh 13:34 "I'm giving you a new commandment: LOVE EACH OTHER IN THE SAME WAY THAT I HAVE LOVED YOU. GW

How did Jesus love the Church and how does it Translate to Unity?

You have to follow this very raptly and calmly.

Joh 15:13 FOR THE GREATEST LOVE OF ALL IS A LOVE THAT SACRIFICES ALL. And THIS GREAT LOVE IS DEMONSTRATED WHEN A PERSON SACRIFICES HIS LIFE FOR HIS FRIENDS. TPT

This is where many Christians miss it: because Jesus has died for us, and no man can [for real] die like Jesus did, nor die to save humanity, they presume the sacrifice can only be “one-sided” and is complete.

Well, we should be mindful that this “death thing” involves both Jesus and every single one of us. How?

Mat 16:24 Then Jesus said to his disciples, “IF YOU TRULY WANT TO FOLLOW ME, YOU SHOULD AT ONCE COMPLETELY REJECT AND DISOWN YOUR OWN LIFE. AND YOU MUST BE WILLING TO SHARE MY CROSS AND EXPERIENCE IT AS YOUR OWN, AS YOU CONTINUALLY SURRENDER TO MY WAYS. TPT

If Jesus left His Throne and honour in heaven, just to come and die for us, you must also leave yours here and die for His cause.

It is the primary “buildup” to the Unity we are looking at.

Wait for it, darling!

Php 2:6-7 who THOUGH HE EXISTED IN THE FORM OF GOD DID NOT REGARD EQUALITY WITH GOD AS SOMETHING TO BE GRASPED, BUT EMPTIED HIMSELF BY TAKING ON THE FORM OF A SLAVE, by looking like other men, AND BY SHARING IN HUMAN NATURE. NET

Php 3:7 THESE THINGS THAT I ONCE CONSIDERED VALUABLE, I NOW CONSIDER WORTHLESS FOR CHRIST. GW

Jesus died to eliminate our sins and sinfulness, but mostly, to bring us back to, and unite us with God, our Father.

Mat 27:50-51 Again Jesus cried out loudly and then died. WHEN JESUS DIED, THE CURTAIN IN THE TEMPLE WAS TORN INTO TWO PIECES. THE TEAR STARTED AT THE TOP AND TORE ALL THE WAY TO THE BOTTOM. Also, the earth shook and rocks were broken. ERV

Now this is where the Unity Factor starts to unfold: Jesus also died so that from the Human body form, He would “transform” into a new kind of body that we will all share, when we also “die” with Him.

Col 1:17-19 Christ existed before all things, and IN UNION WITH HIM ALL THINGS HAVE THEIR PROPER PLACE. He is the head of his body, the church; HE IS THE SOURCE OF THE BODY'S LIFE. HE IS THE FIRST-BORN SON, WHO WAS RAISED FROM DEATH, IN ORDER THAT HE ALONE MIGHT HAVE THE FIRST PLACE IN ALL THINGS. For it was by God's own decision that the Son has in himself the full nature of God. GNB

So now, in that New Form, He becomes the 1st Born “from the dead”.

To become like Him, we must also die and resurrect into that New Form of life: a body beyond the sinful, corrupt and Natural.

Read this…

Php 3:10 All I want is to know Christ and to experience the power of his resurrection, to share in his sufferings AND BECOME LIKE HIM IN HIS DEATH, GNB

This is what Paul was trying to explain to the Roman believers: we must all identify with Him in death.

Rom 6:3-5 Don't you know that all of us who were baptized into Christ Jesus were baptized into his death? WHEN WE WERE BAPTIZED INTO HIS DEATH, WE WERE PLACED INTO THE TOMB WITH HIM. As Christ was brought back from death to life by the glorious power of the Father, SO WE, TOO, SHOULD LIVE A NEW KIND OF LIFE. IF WE'VE BECOME UNITED WITH HIM IN A DEATH LIKE HIS, CERTAINLY WE WILL ALSO BE UNITED WITH HIM WHEN WE COME BACK TO LIFE AS HE DID. GW

Note the phrase: “UNITED with Him”.

It is when the resurrected body, both of Christ and ours, become the same, that they can Unite and “work” together as one.

Try mixing Oil and Water with the Blender.

But then, our own death is not emphatic in the physical, like Jesus.

It is rather, the death of the Adamic nature, aka Mr. Flesh.

He is the principal fellow that makes men God’s enemies; they can’t serve God.

Rom 8:7-8 because the carnal mind is enmity against God, for it is not subject to the Law of God, neither indeed can it be. SO THEN THEY WHO ARE IN THE FLESH CANNOT PLEASE GOD. MKJV

Therefore, the principal reason why you “carry your cross” is to take Mr. Flesh to his death so that God may live and work with, through, and in you.

Rom 8:10-11 YOUR BODY WILL ALWAYS BE DEAD BECAUSE OF SIN. But if Christ is in you, then the Spirit gives you life, because Christ made you right with God. God raised Jesus from death. And if God's Spirit lives in you, he will also give life to your bodies that die. Yes, GOD IS THE ONE WHO RAISED CHRIST FROM DEATH, AND HE WILL RAISE YOU TO LIFE THROUGH HIS SPIRIT LIVING IN YOU. ERV

So, you’d now hear Paul say in this very famous scripture, which indeed, is the essence of Unity to God.

Gal 2:20 “MY OLD IDENTITY HAS BEEN CO-CRUCIFIED WITH MESSIAH AND NO LONGER LIVES; for the nails of his cross crucified me with him. And NOW THE ESSENCE OF THIS NEW LIFE IS NO LONGER MINE, FOR THE ANOINTED ONE LIVES HIS LIFE THROUGH ME—WE LIVE IN UNION AS ONE! My new life is empowered by the faith of the Son of God who loves me so much that he gave himself for me, AND DISPENSES HIS LIFE INTO MINE! TPT

But why couldn’t Jesus, who became human (Phil 2:7) be United with us in Body?

Well, in human flesh, we were simply not the SAME and could never be because Jesus was sinless and without corruption, but we sin often and fall short of God’s glory (Rom 3:23).

So, His “body” was “used” to cleanse ours.

2Co 5:21 Christ was without sin, but for our sake God made him share our sin in order that in union with him we might share the righteousness of God. GNB

He is the “Last Adam” while we are of the 1st Adam.

There can be no compatibility in the 2 natures.

1Co 15:44,45,47 It is planted a natural body; it comes again as a body of the spirit. IF THERE IS A NATURAL BODY, THERE IS EQUALLY A BODY OF THE SPIRIT. And so it is said, THE FIRST MAN ADAM WAS A LIVING SOUL. THE LAST ADAM IS A LIFE-GIVING SPIRIT…The first man is from the earth, and of the earth: THE SECOND MAN IS FROM HEAVEN. BBE

May God kill us, raise up back to the new life and make us worthy to be one with His Son, in Jesus name.

Join us on Wednesday for more digging in as we continue this enlightening subtopic.

Keep Shinning!

Brother Prince

Monday, January 09, 2022

08055125517; 08023904307

[tagedeszorns]

You've already very correctly noted that, unlike you, I have an absolute Fabius-Atheist-attitude to the old GW lore. I don't believe in an intelligent design, but in a bunch of guys who just turned completely whacky ideas that came up in their drunken heads late at night into a game. Who then later, surprised by their success, just bullshitted explanations all over the place. So that it would fit together somewhere. So that the machine doesn't squeak too much.

I base this on the fact that I used to stand around the tables at cons in the nineties and watch the big boys play tabletop games. And Warhammer was always the wacky, colourful, fun game (Orks with trucks!!!!). If you wanted a serious background, you played Battletech. Warhammer was fun and madness. In the best sense!

In my perception, it only really got serious when they tried to sort the Heresy together.

And this is the moment when I want to come around the corner with a Star Wars analogy! Because Star Wars also has the idolised (not by me) origin trilogy. The founding myth. But it only holds up if you keep making the craziest twists and turns to explain away every piece of bullshit. The most prominent example here is surely the Kessel Run. The amount of mental gymnastics fans made to explain why parsecs are a unit of time not space is phantastic! If you read through what George Lucas had actually planned, you will feel horrible.

I definitely only became a fan when what is now the Extended Universe came along. Cool books, great comics, tabletop RPGs. That had consistency, that was thought out. I can live with retcons (even though I really, really miss the old Boba Fett!), but when it fits, it fits!

And it's the same with Warhammer: I don't want all that Oldhammer stuff at all. Give me the Heresy books as a solid foundation and as a point at which I can start taking even newer 40k lore seriously.

Give me carefully inserted "unreliable narrators" that still tell a complete story! Of course, an Imperial scribe might describe Fabius as a child-eating monster with five heads and twenty arms - but then that's obvious from the start. That everything is coloured. That the madness has a propagandistic background. That doesn't have to be patched in afterwards as a lame explanation for a sudden change of direction. Madness comes straight out of the box, so to speak, with method!

We will always disagree on this - and that's fantastic! Because it can't get much more in the spirit of the guys who created a completely crazy universe just for fun! Everyone can find something that excites them. Even completely contrary things. And that's what we're doing.

And another volte-face in the direction of Fabius: whether he was just a name at the beginning and the whole Frankenstein-Mengele superstructure only came gradually doesn't matter for that. What he always retained was the noble lineage. For that is precisely the literal translation of his name: The Noble. Perhaps only intended as irony at the beginning, this can be found in many of the Emperor's Children - even if Lucius (the radiant/luminous) is not exactly the brightest candle on the cake. Eidolon was possibly the first to really go in the Slaaneshi direction with his name. If, indeed, they had anything in mind at all! And there we have come full circle and we are once again happily running around past and future!

Let's have fun with the current version of our terrible guys!

Also, Fabio is an icon! Not only the reference-guy for roughly 99% of all "shirtless guy holds woman in period dress"-romance novel-covers, but also playing the part of the pope in Sharknado 5 and that's some damn impressive achievement-list!

I can't sleep because I found out that Fabius Bile is like one of the oldest named characters both in lore and in real life, he is in Slaves to Darkness from 1988.

He is from an age when Leman Russ was a space marine. He is older than Abaddon.

He is from an age when Horus wasn't the emperor's son, but only his most trusted general.

I don't have enough free RAM in my brain to process this. Reading this book was a mistake. I feel like a poor neophyte librarian stumbling over forbidden lore, and now chaos has taken a hold in me.

[seavoice]

takeaways from the lynch family at the ending. in birth order:

- niall: can’t believe he is just some guy.punctured his grandiose mythology all right!  loves his kids but is simultaneously contender for worst role model figures in the series. range. he is so dumb god bless. kind of endearing but in a very specific awful awful way that would make me hate him if i knew him which i may talk about later. and that rocks!!

- mor: i want to study her and i love her. insane. hot. kind of evil. sympathetic. am singularly interested in her pre-gw prologue backstory than niall’s which is insane because if you told me a year ago i would have no interest in niall’s origins but a random character i never met before this book i’d have laughed. but what do i know.

- declan: love him. soooooo compelling ngl i loved most of his arc to bits he is having the worst time ever!!! (don’t become a niall apologist). he has perhaps one speed and that is fucking up with his brothers and then overcorrecting and it’s hilarious. just please can he think more. and then at a certain point stop the thinking too, because #ouroboros brain at this point for my man

- ronan: i can’t believe those crazy people took you out of that magic forest and got you baptized! character of all time. loved his relationship to his brothers getting to be resolved but i sure do wish he got more time with them this series!!! numquam solus got me bad. again. please think part 2. 

- aurora: justice for aurora. shafted all time every time. all i will say for now because this will be too long otherwise i and im so mad. she should be able to kill. 

- new fenian: what would you do if you get to know your dead father as a cheery upbeat optimistic young man who has been dreamt with all the love he had for you but chose to give up? what if that father was niall lynch? i’m surprised the answer wasn’t to run directly into traffic! EXTREMELY delicious plot point. love it.

- matthew: the only reason i can imagine him coming out with such a good head on his shoulders even after being dreamt by ronan, raised by niall/aurora (figure of speech) and then by declan of all people is that. their insane energies cancelled each other out and we were left with one really cool dude. but also i realise as i’m typing this he just ran away for days 😭😭 “i thought you would be mad” GIRL THEY THOUGHT YOU WERE DEAD FOR WEEKS ON END. i love him. that was so sexy of him. him punching declan was one of the BEST scenes and his bryde banter was soooo fun...shame we got zero resolution to his arc apart from a little of that happy sad thing, though :| rip fleshed out matthew arc i shall always miss you and your endless potential

[ameliora-j]

twin flame // gw x reader

words: 3.8k

series genre: angst, fluff, smut (all in due time)

warnings: jealous george, angry george, charlie x reader kinda, mentioned ronmine, mentioned hinny, mentioned bleur, percy weasley slander, alcohol consumption, spitting kink (sorta if you squint), cringey pet names, mediocre writing at best

a/n: idk how many parts this will be,, maybe 5. but i already have the ending in mine. happy reading loves!

part two | part three | part four

twin flame (n.): an intense soul connection, sometimes called a "mirror soul," thought to be a person's other half. it's based on the idea that sometimes one soul gets split into two bodies. one of the main characteristics of a twin flame relationship is that it will be both challenging and healing. this is due to the mirroring nature of a twin flame; they show you your deepest insecurities, fears, and shadows. but they also help you overcome them and vice versa—your twin flame will be equally affected by you.

george weasley. what could you say about george weasley? he is… charismatic. funny, charming, fiery, pretty. everything. george is everything. he’s your best friend, of course, since the two of you were young. your fathers worked at the ministry together, so you and your siblings had playdates with the weasley siblings all the time, whether it be at your house or at the burrow. george is three years your senior, and he’s extremely protective of you. more than your soulmate, george is your twin flame—platonically, of course—that’s all that it would ever be. solely a platonic connection. at least that’s what you thought…

after the war, you and george became even closer. something about both of your lives being put on the line brought the two of you that much closer. after the war, you moved into the apartment above the joke shop with fred and george and began working as the store clerk and attendant. your parents had, unfortunately, died in the war and left just you and your siblings. when you told your older brother that you couldn’t stay in the house filled with memories, he completely understood. fred and george offered you to stay with them, and how could you say no to your favorite twins and your best friends? and besides, fred wouldn’t have let you say no. especially after you saved his life, pushing him out of the way of the falling debris. (fred weasley is alive. no i don’t take criticism.)

the transition was possibly the easiest thing you had ever gone through in your life. living with fred and george was a dream. it was all late night movie dates and cooking dinner together which ended up with the three of you throwing various ingredients at each other and laughing your heads off. this meant that you guys often ended up flooing to the burrow, and eating whatever it was that molly made for dinner that night.

that leads us to another point. molly. she absolutely adores you. she thanked you a million times over for saving fred’s life, it’s not something that she would ever let you forget. she’s like your second mom, and she thinks the world of you. everytime you saw her, she was sure to remind you that you could just give her a call if fred and george ever got out of line and she would be sure to put them back in check. not that you ever needed to, the twins were lovely to be around.

you were finishing up with your last customer of the day as george was locking up the doors and fred was beginning to clean up. just as the last customer walked out, george walked up to you and sat atop the counter in front of you as you were wiping it clean. “oh, please make yourself comfortable,” you remarked sarcastically as you threw away the clorox wipe.

“thanks love, i did,” he smirked. you rolled your eyes with a giggle as you began your count of the money in the register. “so as you know… we’re closing the shop up for christmas,” he began.

“georgie, if you have something to ask then please ask it,” you lightly teased.

“mum wants you to come to the burrow for christmas. i, of course, would also love for you to come. but mum’s threatened me a million times over if i don’t ask. i told her that you had your own family but she absolutely insisted at least ask you. she also told me to tell you that charlie would be there. as well as ron and hermione and harry and ginny and bill and fleur,” george spoke.

“well gosh, if charlie’s going, then i have to be there. after all, he is the hottest weasley brother,” you joked. if you weren’t so oblivious, then you would’ve noticed the look on george’s face after your harmless joke. you would’ve noticed the way his jaw hardened and his nostrils flared. you would’ve saw that way his gaze turned icy and the vein in his neck began to protrude in just the slightest as his face turned the slightest shade of pink. and you absolutely wouldn’t have missed the way that his chuckle wasn’t truly one of humor. you wouldn’t have missed how tense he became and you definitely wouldn’t have missed the ice in his tone when he replied.

“good one, love. are you coming or not?” the words were harsh, but you paid no mind. you didn’t catch it, but fred did. you also didn’t catch the harsh glare that fred sent his twin brother. or the way that he mouthed harsh words at him as he fixed him with an even harsher glare. but of course… you were oblivious. to you, george saw you as nothing more than a very good friend. a younger sister even. after all, you were ginny’s age. but to george…? to george he saw everything.

you were charismatic. funny, charming, fiery, pretty. gorgeous even. you were… ethereal. you were george’s everything and he was your’s. but the two of you didn’t know that. both of you were hiding a huge secret from each other. one that neither of you dared reveal. you didn’t dare tell anyone. your crush on george weasley was a secret that you were absolutely prepared to take to your grave. nobody knew. okay well that’s a lie… harry knew. but that’s only because the bugger was practicing his stupid legilimency and failed to tell you that you were the subject.

your heart fell to your ass when you heard the loud gasp harry let out and you turned to see his wand aimed at you. “you like-“ you practically flew across the gryffindor table and shoved your hand over his mouth before he could reveal your secret. the action had all heads turning to you, causing you to sheepishly smile and offer a wave before pulling away from him, demanding that he follow you. “you like george?!” he whisper shouted once you had finally lead him into an abandoned classroom.

“yes, but harry please don’t say anything, you have to swear it on your parents!” you exclaimed.

“that seems a brash, no?” harry raised a brow.

“swear it, potter! or i’ll hex you into oblivion,” you threatened.

“i swear it! i swear it!” he put his hands up as if in defense. you nodded once before pivoting on your heel. “he likes you too,” he spoke behind you.

“stick your foot in your mouth!” you grumbled, stomping away.

~~

it was three days before christmas, and you fred and george were fully packed. you were sat in george’s room, kneeling on the floor as you packed your last few items and began to zip your bag. there was a soft knock on the door before it opened. “all ready, butterfly?” george asked. that’s another thing about the weasley twin—he had called you butterfly for as long as he could talk. you figured that it was because the two of you would chase butterflies together when you were little. once, a blue monarch landed on your nose, causing you to let out the sweetest giggle. if you ask george, he’d tell you that it was that exact moment that caused him to fall in love with you.

you looked ethereal. the way the blue monarch landed gently on your nose and you just let out the purest giggle. “georgie, look!” you exclaimed quietly so as not to frighten the creature as the giggle fluttered in your chest and tumbled past your lips. it was then that he knew. the sun shone on you so perfectly, like a spotlight almost. like the ball of fire in the sky was made for you and you only. the smile on your face was unmatched as continuous giggles spilled past your lips and your hair cascaded down your back. george fell in love with you that day. and at that moment, he decided that he would stop at absolutely nothing to see you smile like that again. to hear you giggle like that again. in that moment, everything was okay. there was no wizarding war. no death eaters and no voldemort. no dark thoughts and no fear. there was just you and george. and the pretty blue butterfly that made him fall in love.

you looked up at him and shot him a smile before nodding. he offered you a hand and you took it, allowing him to pull you up from the floor. he carried your bag down the stairs for you and the three of you stood in front of the fireplace. “you first, butterfly,” georgie smiled and kissed your head. you stepped into the fireplace and fred handed you the floo powder. you called out your destination before throwing the powder. you stepped out at the burrow and were immediately tackled into a hug.

“y/n/n!” ginny exclaimed, lifting you from the ground and twirling you in the air.

“hi gin,” you wrapped your arms around her neck as a giggle tumbled past your lips. fred stepped out after you, and her reaction was less than thrilled to see him. she simply waved after she set you on the ground, dragging you into the living room as she ignored the younger twin that had now also stepped out of the fireplace.

“great to see you too, baby sister,” george teased lightly.

“don’t care george!” she called. you greeted arthur and molly before kneeling in front of the coffee table in the living room. charlie, hermione, fleur, and harry were each sat on the couches and ginny kneeled next to you. “sooo… tell us everything!” she exclaimed excitedly.

“about what?” you asked with a giggle.

“about george!” she whisper shouted as she slapped your shoulder.

“there’s nothing to tell, gin. he’s my best friend, he has been since we were young,” you explained, trying to force the heat that was creeping up your neck away.

“bullshit, y/n! harry already told me, now spill it all!” she demanded.

“harry!” you pressed.

“she threatened me if i didn’t tell her!” he exclaimed. “and i’m more scared of her than i am of you,” he defended with a nervous gulp.

“well i didn’t tell anyone, y/n. only fleur and hermione,” she waved it off.

“dude!” you slapped her shoulder.

“well we didn’t tell anyone, mon amour,” fleur assured as she sipped her drink.

“i… may have accidentally let it slip to charlie a few minutes ago…” hermione spoke sheepishly.

“you told charlie?! he can’t keep a secret to save his life!” you whined.

“hey, ‘m right here!” charlie defended. “and i didn’t tell anyone but my dragons, and they can’t speak. so i’m doing better than eighty percent of the people here,” he smirked.

you groaned as your entire body heated up in embarrassment. “this is awful. absolutely awful, ‘m gonna die. if he ever finds out i’ll actually die. what am i gonna do?” you whined as your arms came up to cover your face.

“we’re gonna make him jealous, bunny,” you heard charlie’s voice and suddenly the burly, bearded man was straddling you and pinning your arms above your head.

“what are you on about, weasley?” you glared, skeptically.

“well y/n/n, it’s no secret that you’re… well… a huge pussy,” gin began.

“hey!” you exclaimed indignantly.

“she’s not wrong,” charlie defended, causing you to turn your glare to the astronomically muscled man that still had you pinned to the floor with one hand, using zero of his strength. you had tried fighting him off, but you gave up as you had been squirming and struggling for upwards of forty seconds, and the man hadn’t even budged, nor had he broken a sweat. it took zero effort for him to pin your body to the floor as he straddled your waist and kept your arms pinned down with one hand.

“okay so, what’s your diabolical plan, gin?” you asked as you let out a sigh.

“actually, it’s my plan. the same thing i did to ron with viktor, you’re going to do to george with charlie. you’re going to use charlie to make him jealous. the both of you will be here at the burrow for a few days at least, and george will as well. you make that boy suffer. make him want you. force his hand, make him make a move, whether he wants to or not,” hermione explained.

“charlie’s already agreed to help so you can’t say no. we don’t want to hear it,” harry shook his head.

“you told him ‘accidentally?’” you looked at hermione in disbelief as you put the word in air quotes… well as best as you could with your hands pinned above your body.

“no it was absolutely on purpose. we needed his help. bill’s already married, ron’s got mione, no one likes percy, and fred’s his twin so george would be able to manipulate the situation and act like fred and make you spill all the beans,” ginny said.

“i like percy,” you weakley defended the third weasley sibling.

“no you don’t!” harry accused.

“no i really don’t, he gave me four detentions in one week during first year,” you grumbled.

“merlin’s balls, four?!” charlie exclaimed above you. “why so many?”

“i didn’t know how to tie my tie,” you pouted. “and it was a violation of uniform, so instead of being a nice person and teaching me, he served me detention everytime it was untied,” you told them.

“yeah percy’s sort of an asshole,” you all murmured agreements at harry’s statement before molly called you to the kitchen for dinner. charlie stood up before pulling you to stand and you all walked to the table. you sat between charlie and bill, and across from george. you missed the strange look he gave when you didn’t take your usual place beside him as you were too absorbed in your own mind with how the plan was going to go and if everything would go according to plan or not.

“so, y/n, dear how have you been?” molly asked. “we’ve missed you dearly. i’ve caught up with all of my children except for you, what’s it like living with the rowdiest of my boys?” she asked, kindly.

your face heat up again as molly called you one of her children before you began to answer. “it’s awesome. fred and george are sweethearts. i’m the attendant and the clerk at the joke shop and it’s honestly just… a dream. i really love it,” you smiled widely as you talked about life with the twins.

“and uhm… any… special guys?” ginny pressed, gently nudging your shin with her foot under the table.

“ginevra weasley!” molly chastised.

“what, mum?! it’s a genuine question!” ginny defended.

“nothing serious,” you shrugged with a nervous chuckle. “there is a guy that i guess i kinda have a crush on. but i think he sees me as nothing more than a friend,” you shrugged, telling the truth about your crush on george, but turning your gaze to charlie before averting your gaze quickly. you heard a deep chuckle come from charlie on your right before he pat your thigh, causing heat to rush through your entire body once again. this time, you didn’t miss the unmistakable clench in george’s jaw and the way his nostrils flared, signifying that he was positively pissed.

~~

the rest of dinner went by completely uneventfully. it was rather quiet actually, untill it was time to clean up. you, ginny, hermione, and fleur helped molly clean the table and the dishes as the boys all went to the living room. “well,” molly began as the dishes were finished. “percy, your room has been turned to storage, sorry dear. fred and george’s beds have been moved to ron’s room, so there are four beds in there, and your room holds all my knitting. charlie’s room is available, as well as bill’s and ginny’s. you may decide how you all sleep,” molly offered you all a smile before she and arthur bid you all goodnight and went up to his room.

“gin, you can share with hermione and y/n, yeah? perce, you and i can share my room. bill and fleur will take his, and george, fred, ron, and harry can all sleep in ron’s room. sound good?” charlie laid it out. everyone agreed with a small shrug and no arguments. “perfect. now that that’s all out of the way. gin, where do mum and dad keep the firewhiskey?” charlie smirked evilly.

ginny squealed excitedly as she stood and rushed to the kitchen. she came back with two bottles of firewhiskey and bill and charlie got blankets before you all went outside. the guys laid out the blankets by the fire pit as george and fred began to start the fire. “c’mon, bunny,” charlie motioned you over. “come sit with me,” he pat his lap.

heat rushed through your body for the fifth time that night as you stalked over to the man and sat beside him. he pulled you to be sitting in between his legs and your breathing picked up just slightly as a million and four nerves ran all throughout your body. “really need you to relax f’me, bunny,” he whispered into your ear as he brushed your hair off your shoulder, purposefully brushing his fingers across your neck, causing goosebumps to arise on your skin where he had touched. his arms wrapped around your shoulders and he pulled your back to rest against his chest. “s’just me. y’ve known me your whole life,” he reassured you gently.

“just you,” you scoffed. “just you who is literally the hottest weasley brother and possibly the hottest man on the planet. just you who i’ve had a school girl crush on since i was five. just you who is actually sex on legs,” you rolled your eyes. “just you,” you mocked with another scoff as you shook your head.

charlie openly laughed at your small rant, causing you to elbow him in the ribs. “okay, okay, sorry bunny. but really, i need you to relax. georgie won’t be jealous if he sees how tense you are around me,” he reasoned as he began to gently massage your neck and shoulders before moving his hands down to your collarbones and continuing back up, effectively loosening your muscles, causing you to relax more into him.

“alright. lads, ladies, ron…” ginny began. ron furrowed his eyebrows before turning to glare at the insult from his little sister. “truth… or drink?” ginny smirked as she held up the bottle. “everyone drink enough to get you feeling it and then pass it along so we can start and nobody can tell lies,” she laid out the ground rules before she drank the firewhiskey.

you, fleur, ginny, and hermione drank significantly less than the guys as it took more for it to hit them than it did to hit the four of you. you giggled drunkenly from your place underneath charlie’s chin as you began to feel the effects of the firewhiskey. it was unexpected, but you weren’t complaining as charlie’s strong, veiny hand wrapped around your throat and pulled your head back to look up at him. you let out an involuntary whimper as he poured the firewhiskey into your mouth and you quickly swallowed it, causing him to smirk (basically this tiktok). “good girl,” he whispered as he kissed your forehead, making you let out another small noise of satisfaction.

“okay!” george called loudly, interrupting your moment, and making you smirk. everything was going according to plan. “i’ll go first then, freddie,” he called. fred turned to look at him with a raised brow. “what’s going on with you and johnson, then?”

“nothing, you know that, mate. went to the ball as friends in fourth year, we keep in touch but we’re nothing more than friends,” fred shrugged.

“so you wouldn’t mind if i made a move then?” george asked, turning to look at you, tauntingly. your jaw clenched and your nostrils flared as you felt a big, green cloud of jealousy begin to blossom deep within your chest.

“uh… go ahead,” fred shrugged, confusion lacing his tone. “ginny, have you and harry had sex yet?” fred asked.

“blue. y/n, which of my brothers do you want to fuck the most?” ginny totally ignored fred’s question and gave you a chance to fire back at george with your own rage.

“charlie,” you answered quickly, staring back at george just as tauntingly, jaw still clenched, glare hard and icy. george’s jaw clenched harder if that was even possible and you didn’t miss the eye roll. “mione, are you and ron official yet?” you moved on.

“no, not really. we’re exclusive to each other, but he hasn’t asked me to be his girlfriend yet,” she answered, doing her best to ignore the tension in the air.

you and george’s eye contact never broke throughout the entire game. your faces never changed. it turned into a competition of who could make the other more jealous. your faces were set in stone. jaw’s clenched. nostrils flared. glares icy. tones cold whenever you answered a question. one thing you knew for sure… this week with the weasleys was gonna be a shit show. it would either end in heartache or a new relationship. who knew?

the week brought upon two options. you came to a fork in the road. option a would pour gasoline onto your twin flame. expanding it untill it exploded and brought upon a future for you and george that was even brighter than your flame. option b would pour water onto your twin flame, completely fizzling it out. destroying the most amazing friendship you’d ever come to be apart of.

you truly hoped it would be option a. with your whole entire being, you prayed to godric, and salazar, and helga, and rowena, and merlin, and every single one of the gods you knew that would listen that it would be option a. but with the way that just tonight alone was going… your hope slowly began to fizzle out.

you fell asleep with that prayer in your mind. you fell asleep hoping the week would fuel your twin flame. you fell asleep with both george and charlie weasley running all through your head. wondering just what was going to come about. the night was long and completely restless. you could do nothing but sit and wait. to see what would result of your twin flame.

one thing you were completely sure of was that you would make george weasley your’s. just like hermione said, you would force his hand. you would make him want you.

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[crowned-clown-rising]

A young girl watches BBC Merlin for the first time in 2022 and shares her thoughts for your entertainment.

This time season 3

Enjoy watching me lose my sanity I guess.

Season 1 | Season 2

• This show in never going to let me know peace ever again, is it?

• I kind of want to see Merlin snap back at Arthur more, because if he doesn't the servant-master trope becomes a nono for me. Like, if they fuck with each other, it sort of brings them to the same level, but if it's only Arthur treating Merling like shit, well... idk doesn't sit right

• Morgana my baby look at you how much you've grown. Yes honey play them all slayy

• About her reunions... 1) this Morgwen divorce is really feeling like a slap in the face they were sO CLOSE AND :c 2) How was Merlin so gullible lol xd 3) Arthur's... I'm really sad for them. I really feel bad for Arthur when he finds out and ugh tHEY COULD HAVE BEEN GREAT TOGETHER

• Is that Lucifer

• Wasn't Morgana super good with the sword how is Merlin even facing her with it?

• The goblin episode is the best one so far I'm laughing sO MUCH. Morgana thinking that Gaius knows about her secret and that Merlin stole her bracelet and in reality it's just a random goblin messing around and slapping the king's head after making him bald.

• OMG I JUST NOTICED HAHAHA in the throne room there is a shield hanged and said shield is one that belongs to my homeplace, Castilla y León, in Spain. And his fact it's even better when you know that in my hometown there is a pub called Camelot

• Is that the woman from Balto AND the herbalist teacher from Harry Potter

• Morgana using Gwen and putting her at risk to kill Arthur just broke my heart. I cannot- Not them. They were in love, your honor 😭

• Arthur: I have to do this alone. No help.

Merlin: Sorry I couldn't hear you. My ears suddenly fell off. Anyway I'm going to check every tabern in this realm in search for even more unrequested help. Ok I just miss Gwaine.

• Why doesn't Merlin tell Gwaine about his magic. He would keep the secret even just out of spite lol and probably high five the boy.

• This is not fair I already love Gwaine so fucking much 🤡 I really hate it here.

• Gwaine bi king??? How can I not stan.

• I need you guys to tell me the exact episode I need to skip so that Gwaine simply stops appearing in scenes and there is no other reason for it, we'll just say he went explore something.

• Is that the timelord from Doctor who

• Is that Queen Victoria from Doctor who

• I can't help it I'm pretty sad that Arthur not only has no idea of everything Merlin does, but he instead thinks he was doing something completely false and irresponsible and– like going to get drunk the day Gwen is getting burnt at the stake. It's SO SAD BC I WOULD BE SO DISSAPPOINTED AT MERLIN FOR NOT HELPING OUT AND Merlin must feel SO bad for not beeing seen and auhdfjalf

• Listen you don't understand just how much I wish Morgana had left Gwen out of their plots. It doesn't even make sense, she loved her so much and Gwen did nothing to her how could she be so eager to see her dead?? I hate it here. Imagine if Morgana was conflicted bc of Gwen? like, she would pursue her path but would try at least not to hurt Gwen, doesn't that make much more sense??

• Arthur and Gwen don't make my little heart flick as much, but they are pretty cute I have to admit it. And Merlin honestly seems happy that the people he loves are happy together.

• Is that Dudley Dursley

• This ep before the finale make me feel good about Merlin and Arthur. Not as a couple, but in reflection of character development and all. And they are awarded by their choices like yes finally.

• Unrelated but the 4 second scene where Merlin is doing chores for Arthur and Arthur is just there vibing and asking for advise/ranting gives such a homey comfy ambient between them that it's so sweet.

• I'm so grateful for Lance to know about Merlin's powers. Like yes finally an ally and a friend who sees him and can confide in 😭🥺 I just wish Gwaine knew too. That man is everything but a snitch.

• Gwaine con el uniforme de caballero guApooo El barrio entero para tii la reina del martes santoo el niño de nUestroS OjoS!