#give me the cringefail old men

[writingpoorly]

Actually, roll it back. Lets all just return to the caves.

[brotherdusk]

onum and ducem barr make me so so sad and insane every time I reread foundation/foundation & empire biting crying tearing my hair etc

[thelordofgifs]

Obscure Tolkien Blorbo: Quarterfinal

Urwen vs Eldacar of Gondor

Urwen:

Also known as Lalaith, she was the elder daughter of Húrin and Morwen and died age three of the Evil Breath from Angband.

MY SWEET LAUGHING DAUGHTER SHE DESERVED SO MUCH BETTER

In response to her death, Hurin says this "Marrer of Middle-earth, would that I might see you face to face, and mar you as my lord Fingolfin did!' His love and subsequent loss of her is definitely a motivator, I think, for his later valiant defiance of Morgoth! So she may have died young but she had a big impact. (I mean if we want to apply the butterfly effect she kinda caused the fall of Nargothrond: motivated Hurin to deny Morgoth, got Turin cursed to give really bad advice about bridges, no more Nargothrond.  How many 3 year olds could claim that? Also more seriously, a lot of the deaths in the Silm are violent and awful. But we little of mundane, quiet deaths from sickness. A young child dying in this way stands out in its more realist tragedy. And it shows the subtler ways Morgoth sowed despair in middle earth and also that he knew the Edain were a threat. The 'evil breath' mostly killed 'the children or the rising youth in the houses of Men.'

Eldacar of Gondor:

The twenty-first King of Gondor, also known as Vinitharya. During his reign the conflict known as the Kin-strife occurred and he was forced from his throne for ten years.

The blorbo of all time actually. He’s the protagonist of one of the most interesting stories in the LoTR appendices, the Kin-strife, and everything about his life story is so fascinating! His father was the crown prince of Gondor and his mother was the princess of Rhovanion so not a Númenorean. As a result all the racist nobles of Gondor made noises about how Eldacar was of “lesser race” and wouldn’t live as long as a “true Dúnadan”. One of the most fascinating examples of fantasy racism in Tolkien’s works imo – the bigotry is awful but the bigots have a shield to hide behind! Obviously their concerns are actually valid because they just don’t want their king to die young! (Their concerns aren’t valid. But I think the worldbuilding here is great.) Anyway Eldacar was born in Rhovanion and given the birth-name Vinitharya, but when he returned to Gondor aged five he was obliged to take up the Quenya name Eldacar, presumably to pacify all the racists in Gondor. He’s the EMBODIMENT of mixed-race/immigrant child trauma my beloved. Eventually his father died and he ascended to the throne of Gondor, but then his shitty second cousin Castamir (all my homies hate Castamir he’s the worst) started the civil war known as the Kin-strife and usurped Eldacar’s throne. Eldacar was forced to flee north to Rhovanion but Castamir captured his eldest son Ornendil and had him cruelly put to death which is SO SAD. But Eldacar, being brave and resourceful and clever and extremely cool, put together an alliance with his mother’s kinsfolk in Rhovanion and after ten years reclaimed his throne, which turned out to be slightly easier than expected because Castamir was The Worst and all his subjects hated him. And Eldacar PERSONALLY fought and killed Castamir HIMSELF and AVENGED HIS SON which is extremely important when you consider all the cringefail elves in the legendarium whose quests for revenge didn’t really go anywhere at all. Then he lived to be 235 proving that all the idiot racists who were worried about his lifespan didn’t have any idea what they were talking about, as is par for the course with racists. Also the Kin-strife itself has such far-reaching consequences for the history of Gondor! The Corsairs of Umbar, Gondor’s long-standing enemies, are actually followers of the descendants of Castamir. And during the Usurpation of Castamir Osgiliath was sacked and burned, leading to the beginning of its decline as Gondor’s greatest city. Even though Eldacar’s story is, to me, ultimately hopeful, it’s also such a fascinating turning point in the history of Gondor. Also ALSO he’s explicitly surrounded by textual ghosts which is really fascinating. His father Valacar has “children” plural – so Eldacar had siblings!! What were they like? How did they react to it all? And his son Aldamir is described as Eldacar’s second son and third child, meaning that he had a daughter too. Who was she?? What happened to her? He’s such a blorbo and there’s so much interesting stuff to dig into around him and he has to win this entire tournament please please please❤️

Quarterfinals masterpost

[changeling-fae]

G, L, Y, U for the asks!

Thanks!

G - Have you ever had an OTP? If so, do you remember your first one? Who was in it?

Lol, boy, and how! I live and breathe otp’s. My very first otp was probably Seto Kaiba x Serenity Wheeler, from YuGiOh. They were the first fanfic I ever read on fanfiction.net, lol. First otp ship I ever contributed to fandom for was Sesshomaru x Kagome from Inuyasha, where I wrote my very first fics and did fanart.

Though if we want to get really cheeky, I could argue that my very first ship was the knife and the spoon, from cutlery and making them kiss as a tiny kiddo, lol.

L - Say something genuinely nice about a character who isn’t one of your faves. (Characters you’re neutral about are fair game, as are characters you merely dislike. Characters that you absolutely loathe with the fire of ten thousand suns are exempt, as there is no point in giving yourself an aneurysm over a character that you hate.)

Hmmm, this is weirdly tough for me, not the complimenting part, but because I have a weird metric of how I view characters. Hm, let’s go with… Mizora. I’m overall neutral on her but I appreciate her petty bitch energy. If I were a cambion, I’d like to be as ambitious as Raphael but in reality I’d be like Mizora and I do appreciate a good petty play. It’s the Gemini in me, lol.

U - Three favorite characters from three different fandoms, and why they’re your favorites.

I have many favorites but I’ll go with Harley Quinn from Batman, Grunkle Stan from Gravity Falls, and since brainrot be real, Raphael from BG3.

Harley Quinn has been a favorite character of mine since I was a kid watching Batman the Animated Series. I’ve always been a fan of theatrical aesthetics (circus, theatre, commedia dell’arte, etc) and she’s just such a fun character. I’ve really liked over the years how she’s waffled between villain and anti-hero and how she’s not a perfect victim. Also Harley Quinn x Poison Ivy is a top tier ship.

Grunkle Stan because one of my biggest weaknesses in fiction is a sad morally grey older man but who is also protective of his family. He’s fucked up in his life so many times but he keeps trying. I’m a sucker for that. But also he’s just a great character. He’s made me laugh and cry and honestly that’s just a good criteria for any character. I’ve 100% played the fanmade Grunkle dating simulator and no regrets or shame.

And speaking of morally grey, or in this case, completely terrible older men. Raphael, my beloved. I played BG3 in its EA days and the very first time he appeared I was smitten. His voice obviously but also he had my favorite introduction into the game (and still does). The fact that his devil transformation involved a snazzy belt and different shoes is what really sold him to me. He’s so stupidly extra and it calls to my theatre kid nature, lol. I do miss the EA days of him roasting our camp 5 sec after inviting himself.

All that being said, I just enjoy his character within the game too. I like that he’s obviously a villain but he’s chill with us. In part because he wants something from us but I like that it kinda transforms for him into a double obsession. Obviously, crown comes first but there’s something just so delightfully fun about him writing about our character in his journal (entry number 2 is the stuff ships are made of). That he’s a cringefail theatre kid with daddy issues while being thousands of years old is partly what makes him endearing. I loved finding his fanfiction in his house and I love how stupidly bad his hell domination plan is (you’re doing amazing sweetie).

And one other bonus to liking his character is I got to make new friends and moots in particular in his corner of the fandom. 💖

Y - What are your secondhand fandoms (i.e., fandoms you aren’t in personally but are tangentially familiar with because your friends/people on your dash are in them)?

Hm, I’d say currently, Helluva Boss, I’ve got a couple friends into that show. It’s certainly on my list of things to eventually sit down and watch but for now I see it through what my friends show me. Looks good though!

[moved-to-cinnamon-phrog]

001 FOR THR ASK THING I NEED TO KNOW

Here have this incoherent ramble <333

Favorite character: DON’T MAKE ME CHOOSE! AAAAAAAAAA

When I first got into it I really liked Duck, then I grew to really like Yellow, but now… I can’t choose no matter the situation. They’re all my lovely skrungly gremlins, I love them equally, yet in… different ways? Same love, but… different reasons.

Least Favorite character: …………………..the larvae creature from webseries 3. Real ones will get it.

5 Favorite ships (canon or non-canon):

********DEEPLY INHALES********

Well. You know I don’t… se the characters the same ways that you do. Of course, specifically Yellow and his age. And I deeply respect you for your views, as well as your ships.

I… I quite like fluffybird. It’s nice, ‘classic’. It realy got me into the fandom and I fiit funny. Red and Duck are like those two friends where they both get up  to mad shit when unattended together. Old man yells at old man. Wonderful. Noit much can be said that hasn’t been said already, really. And also, along with that, lately I’ve really been liking….. imma call it rubberduck.

Kind of fruity to longingly look at a picture of your dead mate, hand on your heart, while sitting on his bed and singing longingly about your old life together. Kinda fruity to wear his overcoat and be so grief-stricken that you grab a shovel to dig him up.

Third, uh…. LOVEBUG! I’m as sucker for LoveBug because realistically Warren could NOT pull Shrignold but it’s funny to imagine the most homophobic little insect falling for the grossest ickiest boy ever and believing him  to be a miracle sent from Malcolm himself.

…………………………………………I’m also a PaperWiresandClockwork enthusiast because I believe in ‘make love, not war’. I don’t like seeing people fight over Padlock and DigitalTime, it’s kind of…. Uncomfortable? Especially when genders are brought up. From my own pansexual perspective I see no problem why Tony shouldn’t be with either of them. Unless he’s related to one or one was actually a child, which isn’t likely. Also TimeChild is their son <3 he has his Clock Dad’s posh accent, his Computer Dad’s technological advancement, and his Paper Mum’s creativity.

Fifth….. Lesley and Roy. I like the idea of them being bitter eldritch divorces fighting over the custody of their creations [and son], but I also like their Padlock-esque darkness, where they beat the shit out of eachother and end up fine a second later.

Character I find most attractive: ………again, Christ, don’t make me choose between these cringefail grimy loser men……. With their stupid cute mullet and old man twead dress sense and a literal nudist.

Character I would marry: ………….there’s three of them…………… I can have three wives…………. Wow…………………….

Character I would be best friends with: Hmm… Sketchbook. She seems really chill in comparison to the other teachers and I think I’d get along with them. Also Grampa Chooch [my name for Transport Guy]. Because he’s funny. But in all honesty I want to be friends with all of them because they’re all  so dear to my heart <3

A random thought: Yum yum yum

An unpopular opinion: uh…………………… creativity is creativity, as long as it’s not illegal or would be deemed illegal if it was real.

My Canon OTP: 1920 [Roy and Lesley’s shipname, which I like a lot so props to whoever came up with it]

My Non-canon OTP: ………..FluffyBird has not been officially confirmed, it is basically confirmed but not properly. Also RubberDuck.

Most Badass Character: Duck. I don’t even need to explain he’s just so slay. The serve. Go girl give us nothing.

Most Epic Villain: Lesley. Sorry Roy but she is absolutely serving in that outfit. The reveal. The absolute glamour.

Pairing I am not a fan of: uh………. I’m pretty chill with it. I’m even chill with Claire. I’m  just not fond of incestuous/predatory ships. At all. In fact they can go into the greasefire.

Character I feel the writers screwed up (in one way or another): …no one? They’re all done pretty well to me, there’s not much to add here.

Favourite Friendship: Red and Yellow. Despite me literally F/O-ing the Three of Them, I like Yellow and Red being friends to each other, friends so tight they share a love. Slay.

Character I most identify with: …the reason I love the three is how deeply I relate to all, but all in different ways.

Red because of his deep need to find others ‘like him’, but when he does… they end up not liking him. As a foster child, who never knew much of my own family at all, but then meeting my dad’s side it just… it gets me in the gut every time.

With Duck, it’s the annoyance. I can be annoying, I can awfully blunt, and unknowingly mean without ever even knowing it.

With Yellow… it’s the constant bashing he gets for being him and for accidental mishaps. He just wants to create, be it music or paintings, but nobody wants to let him flourish, they won’t let him think. Sometimes it hurts when I try to think, when it’s too loud or I’m overstimulated.

Character I wish I could be: OATS. REAL ONES’LL GET IT.