#girl something possessed me i don't know what
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wolfstargazer · 2 days ago
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Madam Puddifoots - @wolfstarmicrofic - word count: 636
Remus didn't know how it had happened. But he had suddenly found himself on what, to all outward appearances, looked like a date with Sirius Black.
He should have been more careful. A trip to Hogsmeade this close to a full moon could bring added complications. When he'd woken up that morning his head had already been swimming, and there was the tell-tale queasiness in the pit of his stomach that had made breakfast impossible to eat.
Peter had asked him if he was okay. James had offered to stay back to keep him company. But Remus had rallied, insisting he was fine, convincing the others if not quite himself that fresh air and distraction would do him the world of good.
He had very quickly realised, however, that this had been a mistake. James and Peter had dashed off to Zonkos but Sirius had hung back, his watchful eyes on Remus as Remus, out of breath and light headed, suddenly found himself leaning against a gatepost to keep himself upright.
"I knew I shouldn't have listened," Sirius said as he dashed over and placed a steadying arm about Remus' shoulder. Remus gave a thin smile. "You've always been a terrible liar."
"I'll be fine," Remus insisted breathlessly. Sirius rose an eyebrow, unconvinced. "I'll be better soon. I just need some-"
"Tea," Sirius finished, knowing Remus' tendency to imbue his favourite infusion, spiked with honey, with magical, restorative properties that the Muggle version definitely didn't possess.
Sirius took over, steering Remus down the path with single-minded determination. Only when they were outside Madam Puddifoot's did Remus hesitate, his eyes moving from couple to couple inside the tea shop, as he said, "We can't go in here."
"Why not?" Sirius asked.
Remus looked at the chintz curtains, the wallpaper with enchanted roses that bloomed as you looked at them, and the couples hand in hand across the tables.
"Well...I...it's..."
"You need tea. This place serves tea." Sirius opened the gate and jostled Remus through it.
There were two tables outside that were already occupied, but the last one had just become free. Sirius steered Remus towards it, and Remus had to conceed he was happy to sit down as Sirius sat opposite and opened the menu.
"Now, what shall we get? You'll want tea, of course. Disgusting stuff if you ask me. Don't they serve coffee? And you should probably eat. Something sweet but simple. I saw you didn't eat anything at breakfast. What's good here, do you think?"
Sirius was speaking fast and had waved over a waitress who had been watching them with interest before he'd placed an order. Tea. And cake. And a few scones. That was sure to sort things.
Remus was keenly aware of all the eyes upon them. He could feel himself turning pink, his embarrassment at least a distraction from the faintness that seemed to be subsiding.
Sirius had leant back in his chair and had noticed Remus' discomfort.
"What's the matter?" Sirius asked as the tea arrived.
"They're staring," Remus said.
"Who?" Sirius ignored the tea and started in on the cake.
Remus nervously cleared his throat. "Everyone."
For the first time Sirius looked around them, his eyes moving from couple to couple, before he gave a sharp bark of laughter.
"Honesty, Moony, anyone would think you're embarrassed to be seen with me."
"I'm not-"
"I'll have you know there are a great number of girls who'd be thrilled to join me for tea at Madam Puddifoot's."
"You'd best find one of those to keep you company then," Remus shot back, his humour returning as his nausea subsided.
Sirius cocked an eyebrow. Remus raised his cup.
"Feeling better I take it?" Sirius said.
"Much." Remus returned.
Sirius smiled, shook his head, and said, "That's good. Now drink your tea."
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haunted-headset · 2 days ago
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he looks just like a dream ⋆。゚☁︎。⋆。 ゚☾ ゚。⋆
summary: dating headcanons w/ remus lupin
a/n: hello!! this is my most recent fic on this account and my first Marauders fic, so sorry if this is bad!! also, please keep in mind that even though i'm writing a fic about something tied to the Harry Potter universe, this does NOT AT ALL mean i like JK Rowling. i've liked her books since i was a child and have been separating the art from the artist for quite some time when it comes to this. also, i've written Remus in more of a modern situation, so keep that in mind :)
tags: @back-totheoldhouse @daemontargaryennn @o-kye @unbeleevable @mochamuff1n @call-me-frosting-or-not-idc @dangerouslyyour (this is me just guessing who would be interested in this, please let me know if you would like to be removed/added from the taglist!!)
warnings: nicknames with "girl" in them but otherwise gn!reader, mentions of crying, mentions of scars
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boyfriend!remus who's memorized how you like your coffee or tea. or if you don't like either, he's memorized your favorite drink and has perfected it every time he makes it. you tell him it's not needed, that you can make drinks yourself, but he says it's worth it just to see the smile on your face.
boyfriend!remus who wouldn't dare tell you to cover up with a dress or outfit you're wearing when you go out ("any guy who tells their girlfriend/partner to cover up because it makes him uncomfortable or insecure instantly just proves he has a fragile ego accompanied by a micropenis.") and he'll only suggest a jacket if he knows it'll be cold outside. if you're happy in what you're wearing, why should he stop you?
boyfriend!remus who reads the books you're reading to have an extra thing to talk to you about and to ensure he understands what you're describing when you rant about how much you either love it or hate it. "yeah I know, I can't believe he did that!" "seriously, the way the writer set up the plot is terrific." "what was the author thinking? the plot makes no sense."
boyfriend!remus who always gives you his clothes. his soft beige knit sweater? of course you can wear it to our date. you need to borrow his beanie because it's cold outside? please do. you want to wear his shirt to bed? just keep it, he thinks it looks 10x better on you.
boyfriend!remus who takes you on all sorts of dates. library dates, lego building dates (which turn into laughing hysterically because one of you doesn't understand the instructions and the other one does understand, but can't find the right piece), cafe dates, aquarium dates, baking/cooking dates, late night walk/drives dates...the list goes on (i will happily elaborate on any of these if asked). he may or may not stalk your pinterest to find out what dates you like
boyfriend!remus who subtly shows you off to the marauders. he's usually a little bit touchy with you in public (a hand on the small of your back or intertwined with yours, his arms around your waist or shoulders, etc.), but he does it more around his friends. it's not any sort of intentional possessive thing (like "grrr my bbg is mine you can't have her raaah"), he just likes people knowing he has a gorgeous partner :)
boyfriend!remus whose room is littered in random trinkets, some of which he'll randomly gift to you. a silver pocket watch he found with intricate details because he thinks you'd like it. a rock or crystal he says looks like your eyes. a flower that he found because he remembered the one time you said "what a pretty flower" when you accompanied him on a walk. a stuffed animal he found at a yard sale because it was your favorite animal. the list goes on.
boyfriend!remus who mainly shows love through acts of service and physical touch. your shoe's untied? he's getting down on his knee to tie it. your books are a bit heavy? he'll carry all of them for you. you're not feeling good? he's doing your homework.
boyfriend!remus whose nicknames for you are mainly "dove/dovey", "baby", and "darling". he calls you "sweet girl/pretty girl" when you're sick, under the weather, or sad, "my love/my dearest" when he knows you're upset, and "sweetheart" when you're in an argument.
boyfriend!remus who would be terrified of showing a lot of skin around you because of his scars mainly because he doesn't want you to be disgusted. he knows deep down that you wouldn't, but it's a deeply-rooted fear for him.
"Remus, your friends have scars. Does that make them ugly or bad people?"
"No."
"Some of the teachers you like have scars. Does that make them ugly or bad people?"
"No."
"I have scars. Does that make me ugly?"
"Of course not, dove."
"So then why do you think scars make you ugly if they don't make anyone else you care about ugly?"
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geekgirles · 14 hours ago
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The interesting thing about Gobbowl culture in Ankama media (and probably the aspect that most resembles irl football) is the fact that the interest it draws comes less from the sport itself and more from there being players the fans can idolise and obsess over.
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Khan Karkass summed it up best: people don't come to matches to watch them play, they come to watch him.
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Gobbowl fans care more about their favourite player than the sport itself. In fact, for the most part they care more about their favourite player putting on a show for them than them playing well.
And this is something that's been present in all iterations of the franchise, in the different eras (except for Waven, but the game's not quite there as far as I'm concerned).
Back in Wakfu season 1, there was Kriss Krass, who was massively popular, even when I seem to remember he didn't even play in the first division back then.
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Moreover, his main flaw was being a complete showboat, but it was precisely because he knew his fans cared more about him putting on a good show than about the actual outcome of the game. I mean, the man held back from utterly cursbtomping the opposite team just so he could keep the game going for as long as possible and his fans wouldn't get bored!
Then season 2 introduced Maude as the Masked Gobbowler. In Brâkmar. Where women aren't even allowed to watch Gobbowl.
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And, sure, one of the main reasons she hid her identity was precisely because if she was found out, the lightest sentence would be her being banned from ever playing again, with the highest sentence being... Well...
You know...
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But that doesn't change the fact that Brâkmar holds their best player in such a high pedestal the Masked Gobbowler had a say in legal procedures and how to deal with the accused party of a trial. With no one, not even the Prince of Brâkmar, daring to refute.
And in the end, after Maude proved just how amazing her technique is by saving the city alongside Kriss from the Mmmmmporg's rampage, Brâkmar started treating having a girl as their best player as a badge of honour (if only because they thought it proved their superiority over Bonta).
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And then we have the Dofus Era with Khan Karkass.
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Khan, who was introduced looking for new team members with the sole purpose of making himself look better, because that's what the fans wanted. They wanted Khan. Everybody else was little more than a living prop meant to make him shine.
His fame was so great that you could say it overshadowed even Jashash's. Because even though the match was supposed to commemorate him and his sacrifice, what everyone really came to see was Khan play. Even the announcer gave so much more importance to Khan's presence over Jahash's feats.
And, again, the fans seemed to care much more about Khan as an icon than they did his actual skills. Now, don't get me wrong, Khan genuinely was a talented player, more importantly, one that recognised true talent. And Marilyn possessing his body and playing bad on purpose was a great factor in the fans' disillusionment over him during the climax.
However, it should be pointed out that what horrified them first was Marilyn shaving Khan's hair. Because that simple action shattered their ideal image of him. If they truly cared more about the sport, they wouldn't have even batted an eyelash.
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(Again, this is a reflection of real life, where the moment a famous player makes a drastic change to their appearance, social media is already flowing with comments about it).
But no. They were horrified because they idolised Khan as a source of entertainment much more than they liked the actual sport, and his hair was his trademark. Getting rid of it was getting rid of what made Khan an object of envy and desire. And Marilyn, as fellow Khan Karkass Stan and scorned admirer, knew that. He knew it better than anyone. That's why he did it.
And I don't know wny I chose to fixate on this today and overanalyse a relatively small aspect of the franchise. I just guess this is all a neat piece of world building.
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nemjoonsart · 1 year ago
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JUNGKOOK for CALVIN KLEIN 🌸
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apollo-zero-one · 7 months ago
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Man I can't believe I had the chance to go to a performing arts school up through middle school and I fuckin quit after 6 months just because I got bullied. BRO YOUR HOMEWORK WAS POETRY!! YOU HAD TO PRACTICE DANCING TO COTTON EYE JOE AS YOUR BIG UNIT TEST. GYM CLASS HAD A CIRCUS UNIT!! YOU HAD A WHOLE DAILY CLASS ON IMPROV!!! YOU FOOL!! YOU ABSOLUTE IMBICILE!! YOU COULD HAVE BEEN A YOUTUBER!!! YOU COULD HAVE BEEN ONE OF THOSE TWEENAGERS GETTING LOADED BY MAKING SHITTY YOUTUBE SHORTS IN 2008-14!! But noooOoooOOOoo little miss Noellie (who WANTED TO GO!! who worked SO HARD and sent in an application essay and did an INTERVIEW to get in!!) couldn't handle disruptive classmates or little scuffles and petty grudges and general Attitude of the other students and cried to mommy to put her back in public school. I am EATING MY HAIR over what Could Have Been. I COULD BE SOMEONE'S ANNOYING YOUTUBER!! I could be a DISGRACED DISNEY CHANNEL STAR!! I could be an America's Got Talent winner! A mild to moderately successful comedian! I could be making short films!! But no no no precious thin skinned baby me heard a few new cus words and watched a teacher get heckled and begged to give up The Dream in favor of?? Quiet math tests?? I am such a fucking quitter I quit everything the second it gets too hard I always take the out as soon as it's offered what's my fucking damage.....
#I had SO MUCH POTENTIAL and I SQUANDERED IT!! weak ass third grade PUSSY! Your life could have been SO SICK!!#or you could at least be addicted to cocain or something interesting like that!! Boring ass goody two shoes always just staying home doing#NOTHING bitch make a REAL FRIEND go to a God Damn PARTY live a little instead of just hiding in the closet eating saltine crackers for years#waiting for it to be quiet outside before you ever even toed the line#mentally ill self-isolating motherfucker#you could have shrugged it off you could have GROWN A PAIR and FOUGHT BACK but you just ran and cried for mommy#victim complex little bitch baby always whining and exaggerating and making shit up fucking LIAR I am you and I KNOW what you did and I know#you knew it wasn't the truth and you regretted it the moment it came out of uour mouth but once you'd said it you just swallowed it back and#doubled down incriminating or discrediting others with your lies. For why? Because you didn't like them? You could have ruined someone's#life you wouldn't have hesitated mayhe you did and don't even remember because you cant keep your mouth shut with your pants ablaze#manipulative little shit and to WHAT END? Pity? Sympathy? Attention? Entertainment?? What was even going on in your stupid ugly head?#This is a callout post for my third grade self that possessed demon ass evil nine year old. That kid drowned anthills in olive oil and#poisoned a wild animal once. That kid cut plants just to see if they oozed. That kid modified her whole ass personality on a dime for a boy#she had a crush on. INSTANTLY dropped a LIFELONG CULTURAL ALLEGIANCE (thats what football teams were like back then in our town) because he#said he had the opposite allegiance??? What the fuck? girl had NO integrity none zip zilch.#No empthy either that kid looked at everyone else on earth like they were friggin space aliens and she was the only one with Real feelings.#bitch literally thought like 'I have Feelings they just have Reactions' bitch what the fuckkkkk#that nine year old was fucked the hell up!!!#and for literally NO REASON!! No cause!! Just born fucking evil and weird. jesus fuck.#Evil ass bitch caused her autistic brother months of nightmares and then laughed about it and wrote poetry about how evil he was because he?#was a kid??? Normal sibling rivalry taken way way way too far defamatory ass statements#and this girl had NO CONSEQUENCES because she could lie and manipulate her way out of ANYTHING she had the baby eyes and the helpless charm#and played dumb soooo well . read people like some calculative evil AI scanning their faces for microexpressions and overanalyzing each word#choice like holy shit. its not That Deep. pretentious shit trying to play 5D chess on a checkers board.#Manipulating shit just to see what happens?? zero awareness?? no asking just skipping straight to testing for yourself??#'What happens if I step on this' it fucking breaks 'what does that taste like?' it's not fucking yours to mess with 'if I hit this person#how will they respond?' they'll be upset use your goddamn judgement you are NINE not TWO do you even care a little about any other person??#Are you just living in some other reality???#callout post for the fucking demon child inside of me#im so goddamn problematic I'm so so so deeply mentally disturbed and broken for no reason
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torgawl · 1 year ago
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this week's episode was pretty set on confirming a few of our suspections were true like tianchen impersonating his sister and cheng xiaoshi being in lu guang's body at the end of the last episode. to me the thing i'm most curious about is tianchen's ability. is he actually red eyes? red eyes from last season could use their ability though photos but the tianchen we personally know controlls people through touch. having the ability to control multiple people (or two, specifically) simultaneously, which is something quite interesting. unless he can use his technique in two different ways, which we haven't seen any ability user do so far, this feels really odd and i'm starting to think the siblings having red eyes was simply a detail to throw us off?! maybe this doesn't make sense but you know how cxs has brown eyes but his eyes change colour while using his ability? why wouldn't tianchen's eyes change colour if he was the one possessing other people's bodies? and the way his eyes glow in the final scene with lu-guang... is that to show he's evil or is that a sign he's using his ability? but then how? because he was just talking to lu guang in his own body and lu guang wasn't under his influence, right? i'm very confused about him and his relationship with qian jin
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ozarkthedog · 2 months ago
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𝐯𝐢𝐬
summary: Logan's feeling impulsive before a mission and you happen to be within reach aka he fucks you in the jet.
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pairing: Logan Howlett x afab mutant!reader
warnings: 18+ mdni. feral!Logan. rough sex. dirty talk. bicep choking. biting. spit kink. reader can read minds and regenerate. size difference. brief mention of blood. pure filth - no plot. unbeta'd. w.c: 1.1k
an: this look fucks me up every time I see it, so I had to write something.
𝐌𝐚𝐬𝐭𝐞𝐫 𝐋𝐢𝐬𝐭 ⋅ 𝐅𝐢𝐜 𝐍𝐨𝐭𝐢𝐟𝐬 ⋅ 𝐋𝐨𝐠𝐚𝐧 𝐇𝐨𝐰𝐥𝐞𝐭𝐭 𝐌𝐚𝐬𝐭𝐞𝐫 𝐋𝐢𝐬𝐭
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Logan fumes with pent-up energy.
He knows he needs to take care of it, or else he's gonna snap. He hopes Scott shows up soon; throwing a few digs at the younger cyclopes will relax him. Still, he stalks back and forth in the empty jet, from cockpit to tail, puffing on a cigar that's smoked down to a nub of tobacco when his ears prick.
He turns just in time to watch you walk up the ramp. You're suited to the nines and ready for the mission, your leather outfit hugging every curve on your body.
Logan feels the rampant energy to kill slowly morphing into one of possession.
You catch his wandering eyes as you reach the top. Flashes of snarling teeth, slapping flesh, and debauched moans spark before your eyes as Logan looks you over.
"Logan," you greet him with a wry smile as the older, silver haired mutant rolls his cigar between his lips and nods. His energy permeates the hull of the jet; he's like a wolf standing over maimed prey.
"Ready for this?" Logan asks, breaking the silence and stepping closer to you. He's so large and consuming; he'd scare you if you didn't have the power of mind control.
"I'm always ready." You quip, jutting your chin.
Logan snorts, cigar snatched between his pearly whites. "That so?"
You reply with a teasing hum as your fingers dance over his suited pecs.
"Think you can take me?" He steps even closer, nudging his larger body against your smaller one before flicking the cigar nub to the ground.
You cock your head, eyelashes fluttering. "Why don't you find out."
He grips your shoulders, spinning you on the spot, and shoves you against the wall of the jet; its gentle thrum vibrates your body as he presses himself against your back. "I can smell you, you know."
Your heart beats wildly like a hummingbird. You'd been aching since you stepped onto the jet. "Don't know what you're talking about." You purr dumbly.
Logan snickers at the blatant lie. "Keep those hands where I can see 'em," he grunts, gripping your hips and yanking you back. Your hands glide down the metal wall as your ass nestles against his cock. He's got you in a vulnerable position, bent over and exposed; any of your teammates could walk onto the jet any second. The thought makes you clench.
Logan unzips your suit from the waist down and groans as your curves spill from the tight material. You hide your face in the crook of your elbow as he takes in the sinful sight. "Y'sure are a pretty lil' thing." He comments against your cunt as hot breath ghosts over your core.
Two brute hands palm your ass, roughly kneading the curves before pulling them apart and brazenly spitting on your cunt.
A gasp catches in your throat, and it makes Logan smirk. "Knew you were a dirty girl."
As your lips part to reply snarkily, a hot tongue drags up your puffy folds from clit to taint, leaving no inch untouched.
Logan eats you alive.
At least that's what it feels like as he tightens his hold on your hips, making sure you don't pull away for a second to leave him chasing after you.
He smothers his face into your folds like a lion eating a fresh kill. His tongue lashes against your clit, sending rapturous shock waves up your spine. His nose nudges your taint as he roughly pulls you closer and spears his tongue into your core. He pushes and shoves your hips back and forth, making you ride his tongue until your knees buckle and you gasp his name over and over like a prayer. A dark growl vibrates your cunt as your slick spills into his mouth, and then he's gone.
As you're left reeling from the mindnumbing bliss, wondering why he stopped, he takes advantage and hooks a strong arm around your neck and lifts until your spine is flush with his chest, effectively trapping you in a headlock.
His bicep presses against your carotid as his cock catches on your soaked opening, making you stumble. "Can feel 'er clenchin'," he rumbles, and his beard scratches the soft skin of your temple. "Don't worry, Sugar. I'm gonna take good care'a 'er."
He sheaths himself in one devastating thrust. You have no choice but to take everything he gives you. Your cunt molds around his length, morphing and reshaping into the shape of his cock as he presses into the deepest part of you. He cruelly grinds his hips, kissing your cervix and tearing soft cries from your lips.
He fucks you with a steady pace, withdrawing his cock until the bulbous head catches on your withering hole before plunging it back in. Each shove forces you onto your toes. You anxiously grip his ungodly thick forearm for support.
The metal hull of the jet does nothing to tamper the lewd sounds of slapping skin and sticky arousal.
He presses his leather-clad forearm against your chin, tipping your head against his chest, forcing you to stare up at him. His features drip with untamed darkness as he smirks down at you. For a moment, fear tingles at the base of your spine.
"Gonna be drippin' out in the field," he chastises. "Wonder who else'll smell you?"
Logan's hips begin to pound against the curve of your ass savagely; muscles ripple, and skin rolls like waves; he chases his high like a man possessed.
The feral, all-consuming vigor from the older man rushes through you like a tidal wave, drowning your senses and free will. Your orgasm ignites, sparking so quickly you're powerless to the blinding pleasure that flares deep in your belly.
He sinks his teeth into your neck, growling like a wolf as he comes. His fingers dig into your flesh, pulling a soft, pitiful whine from your body. Copper fills his senses as your blood washes over his tongue, awakening his primal senses. The pain from his touch has your cunt swirling once more. No man could mark you like Logan, nor would you want one to.
Logan unhinges his jaw and eases himself from your warmth with a hiss. As the teeth-sized holes on your neck instantly begin to heal, he licks away the crimson that stains his lips. Your inner thighs glisten, stained with your combined arousal, as you lean against the wall of the jet, catching your breath.
"Made quite a mess, Sugar." Logan can't help but drag his fingers through the gluey spend. His gloved digits prod your swollen folds as he pushes the heady mixture back inside your warmth.
A lithe whine pours from your lips as he teasingly curls his fingers along your walls for added measure. "Think you can keep from drippin' while fightin' the bad guys?"
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feel free to scream at me -> 💌
reblogs & comments are extremely appreciated! follow @ozzieslibrary for new fic updates!
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prkhaven · 1 month ago
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YOU BELONG TO ME -p.js, p.sh-
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pairing— fwb’s brother!jay x fem!reader x fwb!sunghoon
genre: smut minors do not interact, angst, slight fluff, friend with benefits au, friend with benefits’ brother au, park twin brothers, sibling rivarly, love triangle, p with plot, p with feeling
wc: 27.2k
-all warnings below cut-
warnings: morally ambiguous characters, profanity, toxicity, manipulation, possessiveness, arguing, kissing, mention of family member passing
smut warnings: unprotected sex (uh don’t do that), multiple sex scenes, p in v, dirty talk, marking, praising, degradation, creampies, fingering, riding, handjob, some spanking, cum eating, slight choking, dry humping, oral(f rec.), usage of nicknames(princess, baby, slut, good girl)
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You don't know how long you've been standing staring at the large portrait on the wall. Your body was achingly sore and the only piece of fabric you were wearing was your friend, Sunghoon's oversized shirt.
You somehow managed to slip away from his bearlike hold as he was sound asleep to use the bathroom but you stumbled upon the portrait dead center on the wall in the hallway that you walked through countless of times nevering noticing until now.
As you analyzed it, you wondered how you never paid attention to it earlier. You tilted your head to the side, zeroing your focus to the other person beside Sunghoon in the portrait, Park Jongseong or how Sunghoon referred to him the very few times he did talk about him, Jay, his twin older brother.
His sharp jawline, the butterfly shaped birthmark on the side of his neck, the earrings on his ear, his sharp piercing gaze and slicked hair with an undercut made you furrow your eyebrows feeling the slight downward frown tugging at your lips as he felt all too familiar but you couldn't seem to place a finger on where you've seen him before.
Your thoughts were interrupted when you felt a hand creeping onto your waist, pulling you as a kiss was planted on the side of your face, "What's in that pretty head of yours princess?" Sunghoon's deep morning voice whispered into the shell of your ear which usually made you weak but this time it didn't as you were too preoccupied by the portrait
"You never talk about your brother Hoonie" Your gaze remained on Jay's stoic face which didn't go unnoticed by Sunghoon who normally would soften to mush by the nickname only you were allowed to use
However, the mere mention of his brother falling through your lips fueled something nasty within him.
Sunghoon took a glance at the portrait you never once looked away from even when he appeared next to you. He stared at the photo remembering how his father proudly put the portrait up when it first arrived.
His expressionless face now held a deep scowl the more he looked at the picture or more so at his brother beside him in the photo whose gaze he interpreted to be nothing more than pure judgment and disappointment towards him and that angered Sunghoon.
His grip on your waist tightened as he ripped his eyes away from the picture to begin planting desperate kisses from your cheek down to your neck to get your attention away from the portrait, off his brother.
"Let's go back to bed mhm?" Sunghoon hummed against your neck causing you to giggle from the ticklish manner, he smirked in satisfaction that he was able to garner your attention back onto him where it belonged, not on his brother
You tried to push him off but he wouldn't budge as you thought he would've, "You need to go get ready, you have class toda-" You were interrupted by his lips capturing yours in a haste to shut you up
"I think I'll miss class today" Sunghoon mumbled against your lips as he fully wrapped his arms around you as he turned his back to the picture as he ushered you back to his room
You smiled in the kiss allowing yourself to be guided right back into the very room and bed you knew far too well to just be considered Sunghoon's friend.
Your hands ruffled in his hair as the kiss grew more feverish and when his lips detached from yours to trail back to your neck with hopeless need to mark you for everyone to see, you let out breathless gasps as he sucked on your neck running the wet stride of his tongue against the burning blemish slowly growing on your neck to soothe it before moving to an unmarked patch on your neck to continue his burning desire to completely devour you up.
He kicked open his bedroom door and not wanting to let you go for even a second he used his foot to close the door because if the portrait was out of sight, it was out of mind.
Yet, his harsh tug on your skin through his teeth made you unconsciously open your eyes, your gasps became louder from his growing desperation and through your half lidded eyes and the few seconds before his bedroom door closed, you caught a glimpse of the portrait once again.
You didn't know why Sunghoon avoided any conversation involving his brother however, what ate you up the most was why Jay seemed so familiar to you.
But the thought ended the moment Sunghoon's bedroom door slammed shut, his mouth going further down your neck to your collarbone as you were led right back into his bed.
ᥫ᭡.
Before the start of you and Sunghoon, you lived in the peaceful life you worked so hard to create for yourself, forgetting mostly of the taints of your haunting past but it wasn’t until he showed up that there was a shift in your said peaceful life. 
You never anticipated crossing paths with him and yet one day you found him waiting outside your lecture for you. At first he spewed nonsense that went through one ear and out the other but he brought your attention to the failing paper shoved in your face.
You looked between him and the paper wondering what his failing grade had to do with you but when he asked if you could tutor him, you kindly declined offering someone who would be more than willing to help him but he was adamant on having you as his tutor. 
And it didn’t stop there. You didn’t know how stubborn he was at the first but you were quick to realize; Sunghoon wanted, needed, you to be his tutor for whatever reason that he always made sure to greet you whenever he saw you, would even offer to hold your bag noticing how you rubbed your sore shoulder because of it or how he would randomly gift you things that he oddly knew you liked.
You weren’t sure if he was doing this for you to convince you to become his tutor or simply because he was bored and wanted to meddle into your life but after weeks of him following you around like a lost puppy you finally caved in and agreed to become his tutor. 
When his bright smile showed the two teeth like fangs that peaked out hearing the agreement fired something causing a twinge tingle in your brain. 
You thought that would be the end of it. However, instead of only seeing him during the tutoring sessions, you began seeing him everywhere.
Your life was suddenly becoming immersed with him that soon enough you were able to spot him in any crowd.
Now you weren’t sure if it was because of an illusive spotlight beaming down on him or if it was just the reflectiveness of the bracelet he seemed to always wear shimmering in the light but in every and any sea of people he shone brightly making it easy for you to spot him from a mile away.
Even when you were out late, Sunghoon would glimmer in all his glory after magically appearing out of the shadows since he happened to be out too and would end up tagging along wherever you were going, abandoning his own plans to be with you. 
It was awkward and quiet at first not knowing what to talk about outside of the sessions but whenever you spewed something to get rid of the silence, he listened even when you deemed it pointless because to him it wasn’t. 
Inching closer to Sunghoon the more you saw him to the point that he began picking you up and dropping you off at the university every time you had class even when he didn’t.
And if you ever needed to go somewhere, all you needed was to mention it to him and he’ll bring you there no questions asked.
He was also now never empty handed when he knew he would be seeing you, especially when you were seeing each other practically everyday. He’d have gifts ready to be left in the passenger seat you always found yourself sitting in or in hand waiting to be directly handed to you.
Sunghoon is stubborn yet he is more confusing than ever. You wondered how he suddenly appeared in your life out of nowhere, seeming to have a greater goal in mind that went beyond just simple tutoring and far beyond a regular friendship.
He would always move you to the inside of the sidewalk to let him walk on the outside. Making his own way that he deemed the only efficient way to garner your attention was by poking your cheek whenever you weren’t giving enough attention to him. 
And what confused you the most was when he picked up a fallen eyelash off your cheek giving a soft smile looking at you and for a split second you caught his eyes shifting to your lips before blowing the eyelash away in hopes of making his wish come true.
Sunghoon was confusing and slick that you never knew what his next move could be.
There was just so much of him to unravel that you needed time to dissect every inch of him to understand a little piece of him and without realizing it, you were becoming so accustomed to his presence in your life that you couldn’t remember what it was like without him in it. 
ᥫ᭡.
On a late afternoon you were sitting next to Sunghoon in his room zoning out as you waited for him to finish the assignment questions. It’s been over 5 hours you’ve been over trying to help him understand the material and you felt like your own head was going to fall off. 
Coming back to your senses when feeling a poke to your cheek, “What’s in that head of yours?” You blinked realizing how you were staring at him instead of the wall like you thought you were
Sunghoon, playing with the pen that poked your cheek, smirked smugly as he watched your faltering gaze quickly move from his, choosing to ignore his question as you now looked over the various photo frames on his desk.
There was a family picture, a beautiful one at that. You looked over and saw how Sunghoon resembled the woman in the picture greatly.
But when you caught the person on the opposite end of the Sunghoon who looked similar to him looking straight ahead both on each end of the man in the middle, not a single emotion on their face or in their eyes made a shiver run up your spine the more you looked at it. 
You tried to look away but you couldn’t. So to avoid any more awkwardness, you innocently were going to ask if that was his brother, whom you’ve never seen around, in the photo but he spoke before you could, “I have something for you”
Your eyes looked away from picture to Sunghoon seeing how he fully turned towards you opening a necklace case that you didn’t notice he pulled out, “I found this the other day” He softly said but it felt muffled in your ears
Your jaw dropped as your eyes trailed up from the case to Sunghoon’s worried expression that was replaced with a shy warm smile when you looked at him. 
It was the very necklace you mindlessly mentioned once during a late night call with him that you never managed to get after it was sold out right when you had just enough money to buy it.
And yet here it was being presented to you by none other than Sunghoon. 
“You didn’t”
It was common for him to get random gifts for you that surrounded what you liked even when you told him it wasn’t necessary but this gift… It was different, it laid heavy on your heart. 
Sunghoon carefully pulled out the dainty necklace, placing the open case onto his desk with the discarded assignment and unclasped it, getting up from his seat and walking behind you.
“But I did.” His voice low and stern making you weak in the knees that you were grateful for the chair you were sitting in for holding you up
You felt the cold metal against your skin as he placed it around you, your breathing silently shuddering seeing the reflection in the mirror at the corner of his room.
Sunghoon standing behind you, the necklace you’ve been wanting is finally around your neck.
You unconsciously touch your necklace, admiring its simplicity but now great value. 
Sunghoon leveled his head next to yours, his eyes looking directly at you through the mirror, “Pretty” He softly whispered, a faint smile ghosting his face 
Unable to remove your eyes from him in the mirror, you let yourself get captivated by the moment, the necklace, him. 
With small hesitance he pressed his lips against your head. There was a harsh thump against your chest. What is he doing?
But you recklessly turned without realizing how close the two of you would be. 
His nose bumped with yours as he continued looking at you. You couldn’t look away. You knew Sunghoon was attractive but seeing him upclose made you realize he always had been and forever will be. 
He looked deeply into your eyes, making you gulp harshly trying to rationalize your mind and body but you were betrayed by your heart and the desire you’ve been pushing away from wherever it came from and when it started even though you weren’t sure when that was. 
Slowly easing in closer he heard the light shake of your breath as your lips grazed before finally landing on each other.
The kiss started off with your lips solely on each other but he felt when you melted right into it, your mouth beginning to move wanting more and he held back a smile, this was exactly what he wanted. 
In your mushed mind you comprehended that you were far past the blurred line to the point of no recognition of what you thought was a friendship with Sunghoon as it now became more. 
Your hand balled into fist to stop the itch from entangling it in his hair but like he sensed it, he grabbed your hand prying it open with his fingers to place it at the back of his head as it grasped his hair igniting a soft groan from him. 
Rising from his leveled position he grabbed your chin tilting your head up in order to provide access to your neck where his hand gilded up and down as he continued to kiss you.
As your neck was craned up, too engrossed in his lips you didn’t notice him sitting back on the chair until you felt his hands travel from neck down to your waist as your fingers raked through his hair, loving how it slotted right through as you pulled him closer to you than he has ever been. 
Allowing you, Sunghoon let you contort his body in any way you want, as long as you kept your lips on his. 
The kiss became desperate as your teeth clashed together, the lack of air making you both lightheaded and the harsh tugs to his hair with his guidance making you sit on his lap. You slotted your legs on each side of his hips as you trapped his head in between your arms as he kissed all the oxygen out of you. 
“Let me take care of you” The foreign intimate words fell from his mouth landing right through your ears to your hazy mind and beating heart
When you pulled away from the kiss not sure if you heard him right you saw a desperate gleam in his eyes that sent you afloat straight into the gripping lustful cloud that’s been waiting to grasp you and hold you. 
Not saying anything, you allowed yourself to be pulled in by him like a magnetic pull as you landed your lips right onto his again. 
Sunghoon smiled pleased by the response even if there were no words spoken, your actions spoke louder than any words that could possibly be said. 
He wrapped a strong arm around you to flush your chest against his as his freehand inched higher until it reached your neck to softly grab it.
You squealed, feeling the tight squeeze on your neck providing him the access he needed for his tongue to slip past your mouth and into the territory he’s been waiting to explore.
His arm that held you went to play with the hem of your shirt before slipping under it, letting his hands roam free on your bare back.
The tighter tug on his hair and the feeling of goosebumps on your skin was his direct sign, his finger massaged at your neck, feeling the structure of it as he tugged on your bottom lip to slip his tongue back in. 
Push and pull feel on your neck made you arch your back feeling his other hand traveling higher up your back finding the clasps of your bra and playing the metal.
He pulled his lips away from your swollen ones making you pout that he pulled away. He looked at you with a small smile, finding you cute. 
So needy, he placed a long kiss to satisfy you just enough until he kissed in between your jaw and neck, having you throw your head back to provide him all the access in the world. How easily you did this was more than enough to show him how you must've been waiting for this.
He felt bad depriving you for long but it’s okay now. He’s here. 
When he easily found your sweet spot, gasps fell from your swollen lips. His fingers playing with the skin of your neck when his mouth sucked on some other part.
If it weren’t for him holding on to you, you would’ve crumbled right to his bedroom floor.
“Already weak” He mumbled as he sucked on your sweet spot wanting to emit the noises that were muffled before by his mouth 
Your mouth slacks as soft moans fall out, your body curving to his teasing touch, his lips trailing all over your neck from right to left to left to right, always stopping in the center to kiss all the way up to catch your lips for a moment before going back to your neck. 
The woozy feeling coursing through you had your hips rocking in his lap whenever he’d suck on your sweet spot harsher to hear you squeal. Getting lost in the sensation that was taking over your body, you were hot all around.
Your panties clung to your soaked entrance easily from the fast rocks of your hips, telling what you want or how your body interprets it, what you need.  
Sunghoon’s hands rested at your rocking hips guiding them faster, “Such a dirty slut, humping all over my lap” He chuckled but his words made the sensation in your stomach grow more
You landed your head in the crook of his neck as desperate whines spilled out of you. The clothed friction against your soaked self made you feel such a pleasure you’ve never felt before.
It jolted you to land on top of his hardened cock that was kept in the restraints of his pants, making him hold back a deep groan feeling you right on top of him.
“Please” You breathlessly pant hoping the single word plea was enough for him to understand what you mean 
But Sunghoon liked seeing this foreign side of you, seeing how desperate you are– willing to dismantle yourself just to get him, “Please what?” He halted your rocked making you whine pathetically 
“Anything… Just Pl-Please” You knew what he wanted from you, to beg for him but wanting to save the last bit of dignity you had you didn’t want to give in, you tried to grind your hips again but he only sent a slap on your ass making you yelp 
“I asked for clarification slut” He tsked loudly pushing you off his lap only to have you tightly wrap around his body to stop him, shaking your head but you needed clarification yourself 
Did you not want him to push you away or was it that your pride wouldn’t allow you to speak out on what you were begging for?
Feeling the shaking of your buried head in his neck, he scoffed a smirk before slipping his hand between your meshed bodies to wrap around your neck holding your jaw in the process to push you away to have you face him. 
Your eyes looked away from Sunghoon but with his hand tightening around your neck, it finally made your hesitant eyes meet him only to see how he was completely unphased as he stared right past your strong facade to see you. 
It felt like he was looking deep into your soul and reading every single thought that ever crossed your mind, seeing and judging the burning desire in you that needed to be free to soar, “Go on, tell me what you want?” He huskily chuckled
“Want me to teach you just what fast is? Mhm?” He raised a teasing eyebrow, his fingers playing at the sides of your neck seeing how your eyes flickered away from his
Content with your lack of response, it wasn’t nearly enough to make him satisfied. He selfishly wanted more. “Or are you looking to get fucked hard?”
He smirked when he heard you incoherently mumbling. He pulled your head next to his by your neck to have your mouth grazing the shell of his ear, “What did you say?” The dark rumble of his voice made your body weak
You tugged at the bottom of your lip having to decide to throw away your pride, to accept his terms and with a mumbled as loud as your voice would allow, “Please fuck me Sunghoon” 
His grin grew wider while his mind now filled with demand to give you everything that you could possibly ever want, needing to spoil you in the way you asked him for. 
“Good girl” He whispered letting go of your neck tapping the side of your hips, the echoing sounding throughout the room telling you to move your hips again
You started grinding again on his clothed cock as your hands landed on his shoulders, eyes shut tight shivering from the sensation of your clothed core rubbing to the dent in his pants while his hand slipped past your shirt to unclasped your bra. 
Sunghoon moved your bra away just enough to cup one of your breasts with his hand, his thumb creasing your hardened nipple before tugging on it making you jump.
Your grinds grew frantic chasing the familiar build up in your stomach, “Sunghoon- Sunghoon” You breathlessly chanted his name as he was all that you could think of
He liked hearing his name coming from you, he thinks he could listen to you forever when he was the one making you feel this way. Your hips stammered in their movements as you could feel the nearing of your climax. You couldn’t believe you were getting off on his lap this easily but your body reacted the way it wanted to him. 
Your fingers deep into his shoulder blades as he altered between your breasts roughly pinching them to then soothe the burning sensation while his other hand laid on the base of your ass, helping your weakening ruts on his crotch to help reach your high.
Whenever you dared to stop even just for a moment, he’d smack your ass harshly making you whine loudly, pushing your tired body to continue further if you wanted to come. 
“Keep going. Come in your pants for me” He teased and the soak of your panties beginning to seep through to your pants made your cheeks burn from embarrassment but it felt too good to care about it
The movements of your hips only grew faster chasing the feeling until you were overwhelmed by it, your loud moan and his low groan mixed together as you came in your pants making you cringe at your pure desperate action. 
Sunghoon fondled with the material of your pants moving your hips again having you shudder on his lap, shaking your head unable to handle the overstimulation and he had to stop himself from laughing. You were so cute like this. 
He stopped the grinding movements and placed a kiss on the side of your head as he hiked your shirt higher and higher, tapping at your skin to put your arms up to let him remove your shirt and bra in a single motion, throwing them somewhere in his room to be forgotten. 
Yet, he didn’t think this through. This was the very first time he’s ever seeing you like this, so compromising, so needy, so perfect just for him.
Your pretty face flushed, the perk of your nipples rose up and down following your pants and how the necklace he bought you rested against your collarbone glimmering in the dim lighting, he slipped just for a second.
Noticing his eyes never moving from your exposed body, your cheeks burned more as you covered yourself with your arms which he quickly stopped before you could completely do so, “Don’t cover yourself…” He couldn't bear not being able to look at you
He looked up to see your eyes looking at him, a slight frown on your face, “You’re beautiful” His words melted the frown off your face making it flip.
Your lips tugged upwards allowing your arms to be pulled away as he leaned in to peck a soft kiss at your jaw before lowering to your breast. He followed the curve of your chest, he wanted to memorize every crevice, curve, dip, you had. 
His hands roamed freely on your body soothing your goosebump filled skin while your hands traced over his shirt before threading lower until you were between the hem of it and the waist of his pants. 
He softly grunted, nodding his head noticing your silent asking and without wasting time, you moved yourself away from his crotch. Unbuttoning his pants, you tugged at his belt loop and brought his pants along with his boxer in a teasing manner until it was just enough for his aching cock to spring out and hit his stomach. 
His angry tip leaked with precum with faint twitching every few seconds showing its desperate need made your body burn.
You may have underestimated him big time. He was big, really fucking big. 
You tried to hide your wavering eyes and harsh gulp as you stared at him before grabbing him at the base, softly dragging your hand up and down in a pace that didn’t meet his standard in the slightest but he was too occupied with how your hand felt wrapped around him, it was just perfect.
Sunghoon threw his head back when your thumb grazed his slit, smearing his precum all over his tip as your thumb was coated with it without a care in the world.
His chest rose and fell with each heavy pant. Your hands were pure magic. You were wonderful. His mind is filled with your hand, the strokes you were giving him, your soft hums, just you. 
You smiled seeing how the roles were easily reversed and you had him falling apart for you.
Moving your hand in the slow jerking motion made Sunghoon grow frustrated, he grabbed your wrist to move your hand faster on his cock, “Taking so long” He spat, “Never jerked someone off before?” His eyes screwing shut when you picked up in pace sending immense pleasure throughout his body 
The more he twitched in your hand the more you knew he was growing closer to his climax, you pushed away his holding hand on your wrist, continuing the same pace he was guiding you in.
His now free hand lazily rested on your hip playing with the fabric of your pants and you knew what it meant. 
This time you were the one smirking from the scene before you. Through half lidded eyes he saw your egotistical smile, the outline of your body illuminated by the lamp on his desk making it feel like you were sent to him. 
Even when he was the one searching for you, you were the one who found him ready to save him. 
His attempts to unbutton your pants wanting nothing more but to absolutely devour you whole were futile as you pumped him with a faster pace.
His hands shook unable to get a proper opening to get your pants off, “F-fuck” He groaned when you squeezed his cock every few times then teasing his tip with achingly soft pinches, hiding your smile
You stared at your working hand, admiring how he looked in your hold before trailing up to look at his half lidded ones trying to look at you barely being able to hold them open from the pleasure.
Without any warning, you felt the spurts coming out of his tip landing all over your hand and some even landing on your bare stomach.
Sunghoon shuddered, his cock twitching at your continuous pumps even through his orgasm on his still hard on, “Sh-Shit, you milking me or wha-What?” He grunted, his body beginning to shake from the stimulation 
You were making him fall apart for you just by your hands and he hasn’t had someone make him like this before, ever.
When you finally stopped, pulling away from his mess covered cock from your cum covered hand, you brought your hand to lick it clean.
You gruntled tasting the salt bitter taste of his release but it still managed to satisfy your taste buds. He heard you. The opening of your mouth and when he focused just enough he heard the stride of your tongue gliding.
Fuck you were licking your hand clean and he was missing the entire thing because he couldn’t open his damn eyes.
He gulped trying to catch his breath trying to recollect his puddle of a mind. There was never a time he orgasmed by hands alone.
So when it came to you ripping one out of him just like that, he was shocked, confused with his own body and possibly his own mind. 
“Sunghoon?” Hearing your voice soft and careful erupted something in him and his twitching cock
Without opening his eyes, he memorized your body on his lap far enough to successfully unbutton your pants without a single peek with the intention to rip them off of your body. 
You lifted yourself off his lap just enough as he finally opened his eyes to look at you with hungry eyes making your insides twist and turn into a bundle of knots.
Helping his hastiness, dragging down your pants along with your soaked panties until they somehow were able to drop to your ankle before kicking them off to the floor. 
Sunghoon pulled your body back down, the feel of your bare soaking pussy landing right on top of his cock made him groan and you whine.
He muffled the noises by crashing his lips onto yours, holding the back of your head to hold you close to him. There was a thump against his chest from the building excitement. 
Rocking your hips, feeling his cock slip in between your wet folds made you cry in the kiss from the delicious feel, “Can’t fucking wait, can you?” He bit your lip making you squeal but you didn’t stop kissing him
You hungrily continued, shaking your head innocently as you rocked your soaking core against his hard self. 
“Hoonie” You breathlessly spoke 
He hated being called nicknames, he despised every single one he was ever given but surprisingly not yours. Instead the singular nickname melted right through the cold facade he kept up for his entire life and burned him whole in a matter of seconds.
Normally he held himself highly in maintaining his rationality but now it lay long forgotten about in an empty abyss.
Stilling your pitiful grind, he grabbed his cock from the confinement of your folds to tap it against your bare stomach, insinuating you to lift your lower body for him. 
Without a second thought, you raised yourself watching how he aligned his leaking tip to your welcoming entrance.
The tingling feeling in your stomach of your nerves going haywire was replaced by the stretch of Sunghoon’s tip protruding slipping past your pussy walls inside of you. 
You hissed loudly as he started sinking you down, “W-Wait” You whimpered feeling the new stretch but he didn’t stop, resuming coating his shaft with your enticing walls
“Take it slut- Couldn’t wait a few seconds ago- Shit” His harsh words only fueled your arousal making it easier in between the crevices that were soon covered and filled by his cock being sucked in by you 
Clenching around him, he weakly slapped on the side of your ass followed by a harsher one after not being pleased with how quiet the first one was. 
His slaps made you jolt on his cock making you moan from the waves of pleasure that shot straight to your stretched out core. Gripping your neck, he brought himself to the shell of your ear, “Bet you’ve been waiting to be split open on my cock” He whispered, “Admit it slut” 
You couldn’t respond, only able to let out loud gasps as his long cock slipped deeper into you, filling you up in ways you never felt before, “Mhmm” You delirious rumbled making him frown, displeased with the minimum response 
“Hoonie- Want your cock…Please”
He froze. His hand on your neck loosened for a moment as all he could focus on was your soft pleas and whines. His mind clouded just for a moment before shaking it away.
You expected him to do all the work and that made him laugh, he let go of your neck to stroke the side of your face tooting his lips, “You wanted my cock, now work to please yourself” He tried to ignore just how perfectly you were engulfing him as he lazily lied back in the chair but each squeeze you gave around him made him feel good, so good. “Start working” 
Having to see the smug tug of his lip made you frown but too overcome with need to put up any type of fight, you slowly raised your lower body up his length before sliding back down making him let out a loud sigh of pleasure while turning his head to side as he watched where he disappeared inside of you only to reappear to just disappear again. 
Trying to get used to the stretch and fullness you felt, you let out pathetic wails as you bounced on him, swaying your hips around feeling how he moved inside of you and soon the pain was replaced by a pleasurable sensation. 
Your slow pace turned into a faster one. The sound of his low grunts and your louder moans, the meet of his crotch against your skin as you rode him filled the room. 
His hands dug into the flesh of your hips giving guidance to your bouncing self on him, watching how your breast moved with each of your hops, “Hoonie” You mewled 
You’re going to call him that every single time, he was going to make sure of it.
“The only one that could ever make you feel this way” Sunghoon wanted to plant that thought deep into your mind to make sure you never forget, only he could ever make you feel like this.
The feel of his tip kissing your cervix as he slipped in and out of you made you fall apart all over him, throwing your head back from the pleasure, your hands holding onto his shoulder for support, bouncing up and down at an arrhythmic pace just to keep some type of sense of having him deeply buried in you engraved in each crack of your brain. 
Sunghoon’s fingers grabbed your necklace forcing your thrown back head up to lift to see him through your heavy eyelids.
You mewled loudly as you felt his sudden fast thrust meeting your weaker ones, “Open your eyes… Look at me” He sent a spank to your ass making you yelp in the mix of your moans and mewls
“This is what you wanted, right slut? To get fucked hard by me?” Through your heavy lidded eyes, you saw his crazed filled ones watching your gaped mouth as endless noises fell out because of him. 
You furiously nodded. Through the perception you had for yourself and others to see and believe, deep down this was all you ever wanted. And Sunghoon saw all of it. 
He held your limp neck by your necklace, his thrusts reaching to where it could, sending you to height. Your lower body contorted, grinding up and down in an attempt to feel more of him in you, which you didn’t even think was possible, “Sunghoon- Please!” 
The loud smack of your ass made you cry as you could feel the burning sensation, “Not my fucking name” Sunghoon grunted
“Hoonie! Hoonie” You expressed the nickname you made for him, “Please Hoonie” You pleaded not sure what you were asking for but somehow Sunghoon knew 
He brought your body to press against him as he snapped his hips harder making you wrap your arms around his shoulders to leverage off of him.
The obscene noise of your leaking entrance meeting all the way to the base of his cock made your stomach flutter and your mind short circuit as you could only focus on the knot forming in your stomach.
You scratched at Sunghoon clothed back, your moans falling directly in his ears as you clenched harder around him as he easily glided in and out of your welcoming hole.
Chanting his name like a prayer as he was the only thing that you could ever know. His mind was being overtaken by you. 
“Taking me so well. Fuck princess” The new more endearing nickname made you flutter all around him, enjoying it more than you should’ve 
He let go of your necklace wrapping his arm over your back to hold your crumbling body sending another harsh slap sent to your ass making you whine as he rubbed his hand over it to soothe the reddening area, “Gonna fucking ruin you” 
Now that didn’t sound too bad.
With your foggy mind, you couldn't register the sentence that followed after, “Never letting you go”. You were too focused on the build up of pleasure in your stomach daring to snap at any moment that you only moaned louder at the words. 
His tip hitting the same spot in repetition without stopping for a second made all thoughts in your head useless unless it was about him, “Hoonie!” You repeated after yourself like a broken record and he could tell the way you tried to meet his thrust in attempts to savor the feeling
Noticing how your thrust became sloppier, the seeping arousal leaking everywhere below you and onto him, he grinned placing his hand at the back of your head, whispering loud enough for you to hear, “Make a mess on me you slut” 
Fuck, you felt good, Sunghoon made you feel so good. Through his relentless thrust, you clenched tightly around him feeling the wave of pleasure wash over you like a tidal wave unlike ever before. You took care of yourself every now and then but never once did it ever dismantle you like this.
Burying deep inside of you to help ride out your high and you came all over him more, the mix of your wetness and cum lathered around.
Watching your agape mouth and your tight shut eyes, Sunghoon admired your thrown back head as the relief your body felt washed over reaching the heights you’ve never felt before. 
This must be the universe's way of repaying him for everything he’s suffered through. Allowing him to have you and see you like this, so beautifully for him.
You soaked his cock in your cum, you were heavily breathing however the air got sucked back in as a loud wail erupted from your throat as you felt Sunghoon begin slipping in and out of you again.
Running a hand up and down your back to soothe your sensitive body, he whispered. “You can handle it right?” You were originally going to shake your head, the soreness of your stretched out walls was too much but the pleasurable feel was far greater than anything
You gave a weak nod unable to say a response, your mind gone in the cloud. Sunghoon felt beyond proud of you, he planted a kiss on your head before delivering a harsh snap reaching deeper into your walls that were molding to him.
With his arm holding around you, his shirt crumbled under your fingers as you held on tightly, supporting your stimulated body on his lap as he took over, allowing your body to lay on him as he did all the work now.
Something embroidered itself into his mind at that moment. His hand fondling with your ass, gripping onto it tightly before releasing it only to crease it sending a harsh slap making you yelp as his thrust met with your very faint ones, “Such a good fucking slut” He groaned as the mixed of your arousal and cum made it easier for his cock to ease out of you 
You whimpered feeling sudden emptiness but let out a loud gasp, your body moving forward pressing further against his when he reenterned you making you feel the fullness of his cock deep in you.
Your attempts to say anything to make him know how good he was making you feel were in vain as all that came out were strained moans, your voice becoming scratchy by how much you’ve been letting out. 
Through the muffle of your ears the lewd noises from your soaked self meeting with the base of his cock had you all over the edge again, the build up in your stomach forming. 
Sunghoon’s thrust became sloppy and irregular, the grip on your ass becoming harder that you could feel his fingers digging deep into the flesh of it, the connection between the two of you disappearing before reconnecting quickly, the build up daring to snap, “Sh-shit, almost there. Gonna be a good girl and take everything I give you” 
You gave rapid nods, your scratchy voice filling his ears, the tight clench around his aching cock. You’ll take everything. You’ll make him proud. 
“The most perfect pussy- Fuck!” Sunghoon’s mind too far gone to realize what he was saying, “Make you- Going to make you mine… Just for me” 
It didn’t soak into either of your minds to fully register, but there was a silent agreement of some sort. 
His sloppy thrust came to a stop as you felt the warm spurts inside of you painting your velvet walls pearly white of his cum.
Sunghoon screwed his eyes, the loudest groan rumbling out of him as your embrace around him grew tighter as his own climax prompted your third one.
Never before have you released not just once or twice but three damn times. 
As you and Sunghoon held onto each other feeling the sticky thin layer of sweat covering both of you but neither cared about it especially not when Sunghoon shallowly thrusted up to push his cum further inside of you.
His hand that tightly held your bottom now let go of the flesh, soothing the burning area by slowly rubbing in a more gentle manner. 
Your aching neck landed onto his shoulder, heaving trying to forbid yourself from crashing due to exhaustion. But oh was it really hard. Your body was more than willing to surrender as a warm feeling filled your insides. 
With his softened cock buried deep inside of you, he managed to let out a few praises, “You did so good, ‘m so proud of you” 
“Let me take care of you now” 
Somehow Sunghoon managed to read you like an open book that he didn’t even have to pry open. All he needed to do was crease the spine and you opened right up, welcoming him into your world. 
Your tensed body now softened in his arms, your heavy eyelids finally closing and your pants grew softer into slow deep breaths. He placed a sweet kiss on your temple allowing you to fully let go for him to take care of you.
“Rest princess”
You weren’t Park Sunghoon’s girlfriend and he wasn’t your boyfriend, you’re friends who happen to know what the other tastes like now.
ᥫ᭡.
In the passenger side of Sunghoon’s car he held up his phone to show the yet again 100 percent on his exam that you helped him study for.
His chest filled with pride as you showered him in praises. He worked hard for this so to be recognized by it, it made him feel good. 
You suddenly stopped your praises when you felt Sunghoon’s threading fingers fall from the side of your face down to your jaw to your neck where he began playing with your necklace. 
Admiring your necklace, he softly smiled to himself making you roll your eyes knowing he was filled to the brim with confidence, “Whoever got you that necklace did a wonderful job” He complimented
“Should thank my sugar daddy, he wastes all his money on me like it’s nothing and bought it for me” You shrugged your shoulders like it was nothing earning a laugh from him 
Looping your necklace with his fingers he raised his eyebrows amused by your choice of words, “Daddy?” 
From the entire sentence you said that was the only thing he picked up on. You looked at his crazed filled eyes and you held back a smile.
There was a prickling feeling in your heart seeing his expression, there was more than meets the eye and you wanted to delve straight into it.
You shoved Sunghoon back to the driver seat sneering at his response, “Nasty” 
He laughed heartily landing back in his seat, “You’re the one that said it” Raising his hands up in innocences but he was far from it well in bed at least
“I said other things too-” You were interrupted by him grabbing the back of your head to kiss you. Your eyelids felt heavy as you entered cloud 9, melting into the kiss. Your eyes closed as you were insatiably dragged into Sunghoon
He smirked, feeling how you easily gave up any control and handed it to him.
He adored you, he really did. Everything that he could ever wish for and it was you, “I really have to go” He murmured, he had to be at the airport in less than 5 minutes to go pick up his father and it was at least a 30 minutes drive, 40 minutes now because of rush hour 
He needed to leave now but he couldn’t seem to let go of you just yet, his lips messily clashed with yours. His hands falling to your cheek to cup it to deepen the kiss. Your heart filled with glee and warmth as his mouth perfectly moved with yours.
“Then pull away Hoonie” 
The damn nickname that made him surrender to you. He wasn’t going to pull away. His father can wait until he arrives.
Sunghoon shifted his body to face you as he ate away at your lips, he sucked at your bottom lip which easily gave him access to slip right on through.
Mind filled with haze and craze for you, he could do this forever. But you pulled away before he could fall too deep. 
He chased after your lips making you giggle and hearing you, he opened his eyes letting out his own disappointed sigh, “Make sure to drive safely” You soothed out his disheveled hair back to its somewhat regular state
Even though he was disappointed the kiss lasted so short, he was grateful for it, for you.
He smiled dumbly, nodding his head at every word you said even when it went in through one ear only to come out the other. 
You chuckled warmly seeing his dazed expression as you retracted your hand away from his regular styled hair, “Let me walk you to the door at least” 
But the moment he helped you out of the car, you were pressed up against his car as he hurriedly slotted his lips onto yours before you could say anything. Not even 5 minutes ago he told you he needed to leave but your mind slipped only focusing on him now.
Your hands found their way to the nape of his neck as his hands rested on your waist, rubbing his thumb on your side, “Thought you needed to go” You giggled as his mouth trailed to the marks on your neck left by him
You let out a satisfied moan as he sucked on the sensitive marks, “I really do need to go” He mumbled but not once did he show intentions of stopping
“You should really stop then” Sunghoon laughed, him stopping? What a joke. 
You’re like an addictive feeling that he will cling onto forever, he’ll never allow anything or anyone to come in between and take you away from him. 
“I don’t think I ever could.” 
ᥫ᭡.
Sunghoon arrived an hour late to the airport.
He was going to receive an earful from his father for being late but it was worth the hassle of being later when he was able to spend some extra minutes with you.
From the moment he shifted the gear to park, he texted you and patiently waited until you responded back before even thinking about texting his father where he was in the parking lot. 
Others would see this as unfair but Sunghoon had his priorities. He got out of the car and leaned up against it to be able to greet his father first thing when seeing him after being away, but his mind went to how not even an hour ago he had pressed you up against it, kissing you silly until you forcefully had to shove him back in his car and send him on his way. 
He felt the buzz of his phone and he looked to see you texted him to let you know when he made it back home even if you were taking a nap which he knew was going to be highly likely.
His lips tugged upwards, chuckling out a smile of pure happiness as he texted back a response to not miss him too much and that he’ll visit you in your dream which he knew you scoffed at but secretly enjoyed.
“Hoon” 
The call of that damn nickname made his throat and mouth dry up like a desert.
His smile dropped immediately, pocketing his phone and straightening out his posture because instead of seeing his father who he came all this way to pick up in the first place, he saw his brother with luggages in hand. 
Seeing his twin brother in the flesh again made his heart drop to the pit of his stomach because staring right at him was his worst nightmare. 
“Jay?” 
・・・・・
Outside on the balcony, Sunghoon tightly held his phone over the rails, his head low and eyes shut trying to ignore the painful pressure against it.
His father’s single text flashed in his head on repeat. Not only would he have to bear unknown months again which he never minded, always enjoying being by himself with the exception of you staying over, keeping him company.
He had to deal with someone else now.
Groaning as he kept his eyes closed feeling like at any moment he was going to disintegrate into pure matter and then to nothing. 
Thinking the fresh air would help get rid of sticky tar slowly slowly surrounding him but it quickly engulfed him whole when he heard the aggravating voice of his brother, “Hoon?” Jay softly knocked on the balcony door frame and Sunghoon stopped everything in his will to not launch himself at Jay 
The headache growing and the clawing of his stomach eating him right up each second Jay is in his presence.
He continued to have his back facing Jay who knew he had every right to be furious at him yet hoped the time apart from each other would ease the unresolved tension between them just a little bit. 
“Dad told me you have a tutor” Jay hoped to lighten the already dark mood from the moment he stepped foot onto the balcony, “I was shocked that you, the ace student, needed a tutor but he said your tutor is able to put an equal if not greater of a fight than you” 
“I’m glad you have someone pushing your limits, exceeding your already high expectations”
Sunghoon scoffed in his head. His already high expectations? Jay will never come close to understanding the struggle of expectation from anyone let alone from their father.
For as long as he could remember, he’s been living in Jay’s shadow, never able to escape it until Jay left for university. That was the only time Sunghoon understood what true peace was.  
While Jay expected some type of retaliation, he received nothing, only noticing how the spinning of Sunghoon’s phone came to a sudden halt hearing the mention of you, his oh so wonderful tutor. 
From Sunghoon’s hanging phone held by his fingers Jay saw his lock screen, though unable to see it properly, he was able to make out Sunghoon’s arm that had the Tiffany and co. bracelet their late mother gifted him that he finally grew into after all these years draped over someone whose face he couldn’t see but could notice the very dainty necklace. 
Sunghoon despised taking pictures whenever they were forced to for family pictures or solo portraits.
So seeing him display a picture taken by a digital camera boldly—so proudly. He wondered what was the depth behind it.
But even past his curiosity, he felt a sickening gnaw at his stomach the more he looked at the lock screen but he didn’t know why.
It wasn’t until Sunghoon caught Jay’s attention on his phone screen that he quickly flipped his phone over before putting it into his pocket, clenching his jaw.
Jay hasn’t been back for an entire day but was already slipping too deep back into his life for his liking.
Jay watched the sudden shift of mood from Sunghoon, noticing how he became more defensive, placing the already high walls higher than ever before.
One of the main reasons why Jay even took up his father’s offer to finish his studies back home in the first place was because of this.
Longing to be back in his brother’s life again, just like how he used to be. He hated how things fell apart between Sunghoon and him and he needed to make things right, for that to happen the first thing he needed to do was address everything from the start. Just not the very beginning yet.
Too caught up in his own head Jay didn’t realized nor expected Sunghoon to be the one breaking the suffocating silence, “Thought you were supposed to finish your studies abroad” 
His eyes flickered a hint of surprise in them but he quickly pushed that away, “Dad came to visit, mentioned how it was pointless for me to be studying abroad while you stayed behind,” Jay sighed, placing his back against the rail feeling the cold steel seeping through his shirt to his skin
“He was right… We were supposed to go abroad together” He looked over to Sunghoon who only looked ahead of him an unreadable expression on his face
“You know I always wondered how many strings he had to pull just to secure a spot for you” Sunghoon sneered, “I mean you purposefully flunked your way out of the academy to live your fantasy normal life and somehow still managed to get accepted” Sunghoon shook his head letting out a mocking laugh after the harsh spat of words
Of course their father would do everything in his power to make sure his twin sons received the highest achievements and education, especially if it was Jay on the line. 
Ever since they were young, their father realized Jay’s natural leadership, his way of obtaining and retaining knowledge and being unafraid of learning from others or speaking out about his opinion.
It was determined from the very start that Jay would be the righteous heir to their father’s company and brushed it off to be because Jay was the eldest out of the two by 3 minutes which Sunghoon knew was a lie and it infuriated him. 
Why wasn’t he allowed to prove himself? He was more than capable of doing what Jay can do and could do it even better than him.
Sunghoon worked day and night after declaring he would attend a university abroad instead of staying. All just to prove himself to everyone, especially to his perfect twin brother Jay that he was capable of doing great things just like him.
Whatever Sunghoon wanted, Jay would unintentionally snatch right from under his nose in the blink of an eye. Their father's attention, the ease of academic intelligence, the endless showers of praises and love and sweeping the one he liked off her feet without even realizing it.  
“Hoon” Jay softly called out and Sunghoon hated that he still used the nickname
Hearing the nickname from his brother’s mouth, it didn’t ease his heart or comfort him, it only aggravated him more. 
“It doesn’t matter either way, I didn’t feel like going abroad” Jay let out a loud scoff
If there was one thing Jay knew for certain about his brother that would never change is that Sunghoon was determined to go abroad for university. It was all he ever worked towards during their school years, having sleepless nights, setting high expectations just to ensure he was the top student each school year and not only did he achieve it but he set the curve.
Jay knew Sunghoon. 
“You went on that plane with intentions to go” 
Sunghoon shook his head, the sickening smirk still on his face, “No, I went on that plane with the intention to leave you before we took off”
“I knew you wouldn’t leave if I said I was staying behind from the start so I went along with it until the time came. I just wanted to make you believed we were actually go to university together” 
There was a strong ringing in Jay’s ear. All this time Jay believed, trusted, Sunghoon boarded the plane with the intention to leave, for them to attend the same university together but just couldn’t overlook what happened only to find out now that he was never going to leave in the first place. 
This was when Jay realized he did not know Sunghoon. 
Jay wasn’t as prideful as Sunghoon at least not anymore, he is now willing to admit when he is wrong, when he’s made a mistake. It took him a while to reach this point but he was finally there, he just hopes he isn’t too late. 
“I’m sorry” 
A sudden apology. The apology Sunghoon waited so long to hear. But it only caused the said male to look over to his brother with narrow eyes, deeply frowning, bringing his hands to grip the balcony rails tightly. “What are you apologizing for?”
“For everything” Jay sighed pitifully feeling the glare Sunghoon was sending him, “I’m sorry” 
The apology did more harm than good in Sunghoon’s eyes, his grips around the rail burned more feeling the indents forming on his palm from it, “I don’t need your pity apology” He spat feeling the anger that was stowed away rising after the years
“It’s not a pity apology when it’s coming from my heart-”
“Shut up Jay” Sunghoon cut in not wanting to hear his brother’s words anymore, unable to forgive or forget and sweep everything under the rug just because Jay finally decided to apologize
“You still think you can have everything you want without having to break a sweat” Jay flinched from the roughness of Sunghoon’s voice booming to the quiet outside world into his ears “You think a lousy sorry is just going to fix everything?”
The raging build up that has been bubbling in him for all these years that all he needed was Jay’s attempt to apologize for his emotions to burst.
“Keep your apologizes, I don’t need them”
All these years of trying to outshine Jay’s shadow to just be seen by others only left Sunghoon tainted with heartbreak and he’s tired of all of it.
“Hoon-” Jay attempted to meddle in Sunghoon’s growing frantic state wanting to ease his younger brother but was cut off again before he could do so
“Do you still talk to her?” There was a defining moment of silence at the sudden mention of Sorin, the girl that cornered Jay and Sunghoon of no escape to the inevitable fall out between them
The reminder of Sorin’s existence left a bitter taste in both of their mouths. Sunghoon found it hilarious remembering how the only reason she tried so hard to get close to him in the first place was because she had ulterior motives for Jay, not for him. 
Sunghoon who liked her so much was left in the dust after having Jay chosen over him even when his brother was off living in his fantasy life at another school and didn’t even know about her until Sunghoon idiotically introduced them because no matter how hard Sunghoon tried to escape Jay, he would always linger in the dark corner of his life haunting him. 
Jay’s mouth opened and closed eager to deny the obvious truth but his silence spoke louder than anything that could’ve been said. 
Sunghoon lowly chuckle from amusement, there was a twinge of disappointment underneath everything but it diminished because what did he expected from Jay, “That’s all I need to know” 
There was a punch straight to Jay’s gut that was filled with disappointment in himself more than anything else. He knows he can’t go back in time to stop himself from kissing Sorin that night when he was well aware of Sunghoon’s feelings for her.
He knows he’ll never be able to get rid of the regret that’ll live with him forever and he’s okay with that, he’ll let himself live in regret for the rest of his life if it meant a possibility of reconciling with Sunghoon. 
Sunghoon’s hands suddenly loosened around the rail, something immediately taking over his body when he felt the vibration of his phone in his pocket knowing deep down it was you.
There was one thing Jay could never get, to have what Sunghoon has with you and he’ll make sure Jay could only ever dream of it. 
Sunghoon gave a tight lip smile, “Don’t stress over it. There’ll never be a single grudge towards you” He bumped shoulders with Jay before disappearing back into their house dropping his smile just as quickly as he gave it
Digging his hand into his pocket, taking out his phone to see the message left by you. 
You: Have a goodnight
His stoic expression was replaced with a fond smile that only you could ignite from him. He took a moment to admire his lockscreen, you panning his digital camera towards the mirror, his arms gracefully draped over you and the obvious necklace he had gotten you on perfect display.
Without hesitation he grabbed his keys before rushing down the stairs and walking out the front door not forgetting to slam it shut.
Sunghoon: I’m coming over 
Sunghoon: Missed you way too much princess
Jay, who was left on the balcony, heard the echo of the door slamming shut. There was pure silence in the house with the occasional gust of wind swaying by, he looked where Sunghoon once stood. 
He leaned himself against the rails again, running a hand down his face letting out a loud groan, repeating Sunghoon’s words in his head, there'll never be a single grudge towards you. Of course there was a grudge towards him and he couldn’t do anything about it. 
Jay tried to look on the bright side, he should be grateful Sunghoon listened to him for longer than 5 minutes but now all alone with his own heartache, he hoped that if he covered his face long enough it would be enough for him to be forgotten. 
But when he heard his phone ping from a notification it ended his moment of self wallow to bring him back to reality. He pulled out his phone from his back pocket and in growth was the faintest smile. 
He tapped on the notification to be redirected to your new post. 
Skimming through the two scenery pictures, he got to the last picture that looked like it was taken by a digital camera. Only then did he finally see your sweet smile as you looked directly at the camera. 
Whoever took the picture of you knew just the right angles to capture the essence of you. Oh to be able to know you like that. 
Jay felt the harsh tug of his heart as he stared at your picture. You were still as beautiful as he remembered.
He wouldn’t voice this out, how could he, so it laid deep in his heart. When taking his father’s offer to come back home, you lingered in the back of his mind. Did you stay right where he left you? Did you ever find him?  He knew it was reckless and irrational for him to think this. 
But something in him will always crawl back to you.
・・・・・
Sunghoon walked through your unlocked door for him and entered your place. The immediate sense of home washing over him as he slipped off his shoes and placed them next to your neatly placed ones.
Making sure he locked the door behind him, he dragged his body all the way to the cracked open bedroom door and peeked his head inside to see you laying on your bed, scrolling through your phone waiting for him.
From the creaking of your door, you knew it was Sunghoon. You smiled softly before placing your phone on your nightstand to see your bedroom door fully opening and there stood Sunghoon looking at you, a slight pull of his lips towards his cheeks making you find him cute, “You look exhausted” You opted to say instead of what you really thought
Choosing not to respond, he stepped into your room crawling into the familiarity of your bed that he had the luxury of knowing inside and out especially since he was the one that put it together. You welcomed him with open arms as he slotted himself perfectly in between them, his head resting against your chest as he let out a relieved sigh.
The tension in his shoulders dropped as he found his haven in you. 
“Staying over tonight?” You softly asked and with the tickled of his hair on your neck as he nodded you giggled
Your thumb softly creased his head against your chest, “Rest Hoonie” You told just like how he always tells you
However, he had other plans in mind. Sunghoon tilted his head just enough to have his lips graze over your neck before planting feather-like kisses on it. Your hand began holding onto his hair as he slowly sucked on your skin, contrasting his usually hard demeanor. 
His hands ran up your side, slotting them under your back to hold you fully in his arms. Through instinct your body melted, eyes fluttered shut, “Thought you were exhausted” You breathless let out feeling his teeth pulling at your skin making you squeal
“Have a better way to get rid of it”
His mouth trailed all over your neck wanting to mark the unblemished skin he left behind. He wanted to add more to show physical warning for any that dared to get close to you. To keep them far away from you. To make everyone know that you were claimed, that you belonged to him.
You were Sunghoon’s. 
The burning sensation soothed by his tongue gliding over it makes you melt deeper into his touch. Your body surrendering itself to the only person that it can ever fit deep in your heart.
The kisses moved from your neck up to your jaw before finally crashing onto your begging lips. You hummed happily to finally be able to kiss Sunghoon.
You wrapped your arms around his neck as he adjusted himself to mold his body into your laying one, melting your bodies together.
His cold hands roamed under your shirt feeling your hot bare skin making you shiver from the temperature difference but his hands never stopped until they reached your breasts.
He smirked realizing you weren’t wearing anything underneath your shirt. “Seems like you were expecting this” He chuckled, your mouth continuing to move together in sync already knowing how the utilize your lips for the other after many times of being in this very position
His finger teased closer to your hardened nipple before pinching it making you squeal allowing enough room for his tongue to slip in to explore your mouth.
You couldn’t think of anything, not sure if it was from the lack of oxygen or if it was because of him but you didn’t want any of it to stop.
There wasn’t much effort Sunghoon needed to do to have you become a needy mess for him. All he needed to do was give you attention and everything you want and the rest will fall into place.
Your noises were muffled by his mouth as his hands knew exactly when to pull and twist your nipple to send shards of pleasure to surround you whole.
He tried to pull away from the kiss, but you were quick to grab him by the neck chasing after his lips. Loving every moment of you simply falling apart for him, he could live like this forever.
“Needy princess” He whispered into your ear after managing to escape your mouth making you to whine that he stopped kissing you
“Stop teasing- Finish what you started Hoonie” You blabbed through your swollen lips, “Unless you want me to find someone else to satisfy me-”
Sunghoon didn’t allow you to finish your sentence, grabbing your face to make you look at him as he hovered over your body, “Don’t test me” His voice dropped from the teasing tone into something darker, “You know, no one else can ever satisfy you. At least not as good as me”
His hands tightening, squishing your cheeks as he looked dead into your eyes with a smug smile. You looked up at him like he was the only person that existed in your life, the one that cared for you in ways no one else would and his heart swelled.
“You’re mine” 
Underneath the fragile facade lay something greater, something warm and sweet. 
“Say it princess. Who do you belong to?”
Your body became weak, your quick attitude dissolving. He moved your head side to side ushering you to say the possessive words. You weren’t Sunghoon’s but if someone were to ask you on a deeper level you would tell them without hesitation, of course you were his. 
“Yo-you Hoonie… I‘m yours” You murmured through your squished lips and he let go of your face with a pleased gleam
You let out the breath you were holding but it was sucked back in when you felt his hands slip into your pants past your panties and rubbed the pad of this thumb against your throbbing clit.
Immediately looking at him like an animal caught in headlights, you saw his smirk that infuriated you to the point that you always looked forward to it.
Throwing your head back, your mouth fell slack as his fingers grazed your wet entrance in a teasing manner. Your impatient whines grew louder, you needed him to do something, anything to satisfy you.
“Such a good girl” Slipping two fingers past your folds, you loudly gasped at the intrusion 
His pace started out slow even through his hazy mind of just wanting to feel you wrapped around him, he wasn’t a monster. He will always take care of you the way you are meant to be taken care of because if not him, who will?
Feeling the pump of his fingers in and out of you, curling every now and then sends your body to jump, your sheets crumbling under your hands and thrashing body as you let out heavy pants.
Sunghoon always took his time as if to study the inside of your body wondering which move would alwaysbsend you more over the edge.
Slipping his fingers out to deprive you from the sensation a little bit, letting them smooth over your small bundle of nerves before easing them back into you. 
In a scissoring motion, he carefully opened you. With the opening he managed to slip in a third finger making your hand fly across your mouth to stop the loud moans daring to slip through.
Sunghoon’s jaw clenched, shoving his fingers knuckle deep into you making you wail into your hand. “Why so quiet princess? Y’know I love hearing you” He snickered seeing how hard you were trying to keep quiet
“Don-Don’t- w-ant peop-people to hear” You pitfully let out clenching around his fingers the moment they curled into you. He can’t have that
He tooted his tongue shaking his head, “Oh no, let them hear know how good I’m making you feel”
“Let everyone know I’m the one making you feel like this” He whispered into the shell of your ear and your body and mind flared 
You reluctantly let go of your mouth noticing how Sunghoon’s finger picked up in pace as he smiled seeing you listen to him, “Hoonie…Hoonie-” Your gasps was frequent as you rested a hand on his shoulders for support feeling the familiar tie forming in your stomach daring to snap 
“Let go for me princess” His fingers continued to bury themselves as deep as they could in you as his thumb found a spot right on your neglected nub making you snap in half
His moving fingers in and on you made clench around his fingers until your orgasm crashed like a tidal wave over you.
Your body shivered as he continued to use his fingers to help ride out your high. In a weak attempt you tried to stop his moving fingers yet, he kept going. You let out a loud whine, picking at his bracelet to garner his attention. 
Smiling at your soft pulls at his bracelet, he brought his free hand to pick at your necklace. Your dazed expression was enough to have him pull out his fingers and out of your pants to see how you drenched his hand with your juices.
The side smirk changed into him opening his mouth bringing his fingers to taste you. He groaned the moment his fingers made contact at his tastebud, loving every second of it.
Instead of cringing, you softened to mush as he licked his fingers clean, popping his salivated covered fingers out before shoving them into your welcoming mouth.
Without words being exchanged you wrapped your lips around them, faintly tasting yourself mixed with his saliva on your tongue. “You’re the sweetest, don’t you agree?” He chuckled as he wiggled his fingers in your mouth having you gag by how deep they were
Sunghoon admired how you looked. How you took anything he gives you without hesitation. His heart fluttered.
He pulled his fingers out and the faint string of your saliva connected his finger to you made him let out a low groan.
Your legs squeezed together as you could feel the trickling of your leaking hole pouring out, “Please” desperate pleas fell out of your mouth like a broken record, “Please. Please. Please” Whining loudly, you looked up to Sunghoon with pathetic eyes
“Words princess. I’ll give you anything. Just tell me what you want” 
It bothered you because he knew exactly what you wanted but he wasn’t going to give it to you unless you said it out loud for the confined space of your room, the world watching, and him to hear. 
“You. I need you” 
Sunghoon’s lips tugged upwards hearing you. His smile was different from other times. He smiled at you and he could feel the look—the pure emotion pooling in his eyes towards you. He gulped harshly, closing his eyes shut before you could notice how he was looking at you. “Then let me take care of you”
His hand played with the waistband of your pants before tugging them down, the cold breeze hit your now bare core when your pants and panties were discarded somewhere in your room. 
You closed your legs tightly because no matter how many times he’s seen you like this and worse, you still felt shy. “Nu uh let me see you” Sunghoon’s hands bent your knees before prying open your legs open and there he saw your glistening entrance
The magnetic trance brought him in and he placed a soft kiss onto your covered stomach before slotting his head right in between your legs feeling his hot breath breezing your wet covered hole for it to be replaced by his tongue gliding over your swollen clit all the way down your folds. 
Your hands flew to his hair feeling how he opened his mouth wide enough to gather as much of your arousal as possible. He didn’t care if his senses were being all filled with you, he rather it be you than anyone else. 
Repeating the motion over and over again, his tongue lapped before teasingly protruding at your gaping hole knowing how much you loved to be filled by him in any way. 
As he tugged on the sensitive nub with his teeth, you screeched, your hands pulled at his hair harsher as the more he ate you out. The longer you felt his warm mouth closing and opening with his tongue gliding all around making a mess, the more your back arched while he kept your legs wide open for him.
“Taste so fucking sweet” He groaned against your core as he dragged his tongue all over as you continued to spill all over his mouth
He rarely came up for air, losing himself in you and the more he lapped at your leaking pussy, the more it led to the twisting of your daring to squeeze out the build up in you again, “C-close! ’m close, Ho-Hoonie” 
“Come on my tongue” He said in one breath before attaching himself back onto you 
He sucked on your clit using his tongue to soothe it, only to do it all over again while his fingers slipped into your gushing hole, pumping in and out of your in an irregular place to help elevate you closer.
Feeling the tie becoming done the more you lost yourself on his tongue, you whimpered as you came all over him, your body shaking with a loud moan and a harsh pull of his hair as he drank up all of your release in satisfaction that he ripped yet another orgasm out of you. 
His humming vibrated up from your core all the way to your mind in a split second making your body have an immediate reaction. You tried to pull yourself away from the sensitivity, already too much for you to handle but Sunghoon locked his arms under your knees holding you in place giving one last drag of his tongue on your smeared covered pussy. 
He pulled himself back up just enough to face you which showed the bottom half of his face covered fully by your release.
You felt the warm blush creep onto your face from embarrassment seeing the mess you left on him but his reassuring smile bloomed something else in your heart. It’s the very thing you’ve been trying to ignore whenever you’re with Sunghoon. 
Noticing how your eyes trailed off somewhere else he softly stroked your head gaining your attention back onto him easily, your confused eyes stared at him before leaving as you saw the same reassuring warm smile still on his face.
You smiled loopily up to him and Sunghoon felt the thud of his heart against his chest. 
You barely could keep your eyes open making him chuckle and ultimately deciding to ignore his own problems, “Get some rest princess” His tone soft and mellow as he soothed your sides but he let out a yelp when you suddenly wrapped your arms around his neck and dragged him down to your lips
Vigorously shaking your head, you cringed at the taste of yourself but with how easily he reciprocated the kiss your mind washed that feeling away.
With his body flushed against yours, you tiredly rubbed yourself against his obvious hard on making the hold on your waist tighten. 
He groaned louder than he wanted feeling the friction again his erection, “You don’t have to” He tried to reassure you but you only pressed your lips harder together to shut him up
Your hips moved faster, feeling his clothed cock rubbing your aching core, soaking his pants and bulge. You were going to drive him insane but you’re the only person he’s willing to give up his sanity for. 
Pulling himself away from the kiss, he fumbled with his pants as he hastily tried to remove them as fast as he could. He needed to free himself from the aching hold from his pants right now. 
Kicking them off somewhere, he easily removed his shirt and right before you was Sunghoon in all his glory. Admiring his build and the muscle definition from all the time he’s at the gym told you that after the chaos that was your family, you were finally being rewarded with the peace of what's yours. 
Looking all around, you saw his raging cock standing all high and mighty, desperately begging for you to send him to the only place he could ever reach with you.
The fire in you ignited when his hands grabbed the ends of your shirt to lift it just enough to display your upper body to him.
Your neck glowed with his old and new hickies all over your neck and he felt satisfaction grow more knowing you were marked all for him. Trailing down to the in between of the crevice of your breasts before engulfing one of them in his mouth and the other in his hand. 
Hoonie. Sunghoon. Mine. 
Your mind was compromised and that’s exactly what he wanted.
Not realizing how one of his hands let go of your breast it wasn’t until you felt his tip slipping into your entrance making you realize he was distracting you from the sudden stretch of his cock opening you like how it always did. 
You hissed never able to get used to how he stretches you out no matter how many times you’ve done this with him. “Hoonie” You whimpered
Sunghoon’s hand let go of his shaft that was guiding him to softly engulf yours.
He rested his head in between the crack of your neck and shoulder as you sucked him into your hole, “Taking me like such a good girl” His mouth let out a strained groan feeling you wrap around him
“My good girl” He whispered for himself when he knew you couldn’t hear
Your shudders far too loud to pick up on what he said trying to adjust yourself to his size already feeling him so deep inside of you.
It wasn’t until you gave him a weak nod that he could move did he feel the wonders of your pussy again.
Sunghoon adjusted your falling shirt to make sure your beautifully marked breasts were displayed as his index finger traced over each of his marks on your skin before having it land on your hip stabilizing himself to shallowly move in and out of you causing the little ounce of control you had left snap as his tip hit the same spot he knew to have you unravel for him. 
Sunghoon knew you far too well, he knew how to take care of you, to hold you in the palm of his hand. 
He worked day and night memorizing everything he could learn about you. 
The slow drags of his cock in and of you made you grow increasingly needier for something harder, faster, you moved your hips to meet his slow steady thrust, to feel him deeper. “Oh?” He chuckled out raising an eyebrow noticing your action 
Putty. You were nothing but mere putty in his hands. “Faster Hoonie please” Your voice cracked with each word, “Can take it like a good girl promise” Your delirious state made him swoon and how could he ever deny you of your pleas for him
“You’ll be a good girl for me?” He hummed, one harsh thrust sending you further into your dazed out state before having it replaced by the precious shallow ones, “Take everything I give you?” He huffed out as you weakly nodded your head
You’ll be his good girl forever.
“Don’t regret it princess” The wind knocked out of your lungs with his instantaneous change when a harsh thrust followed after another hit your insides
You moaned loudly as his hands held your body in place he slammed his hips harder and faster into you in a pace that made you euphoric.
Even though he couldn’t see it, he could feel it and he knows you must feel it too. You just had to. 
His hand that engulfed yours soon slotted in between, interlinking your fingers together and instantly you held his hand back with equal force that he held yours with. 
This was something neither of you initiated before but it felt right. To hold each other like this. Giving up for each other.
The sounds of your arousal making it easier for Sunghoon to glide was obscene but to him it was perfect.
His tip kissing your cervix had your eyes rolling to the back of your head as you held tighter on his hand holding yours, never wanting to let him go “Hoonie. Hoonie!” You chanted your nickname for him as it was the only thing you could ever know 
“Look at me” He told but no matter how hard you tried to open your eyes they would close the moment they opened, the pleasure taking over you 
But just as easily as he gave you that pleasure, the easier he was to take it away from you from the still of his movement. Your hand loosened from his but not enough to let it go.
Letting out a whine trying to move your hip to continue the motion of his cock slipping in and out of you
The harsh grab of your chin turned your head to him, “I said look at me” Sunghoon’s chilling voice made your glassy eyes open, the beads of sweat forming on his forehead making some of his hair stick to it that you weakly pushed away.
You wanted to see Sunghoon, all of him, nothing blocking you regardless of whatever state you could ever be in. 
His and yours eyes locked, your held hands gripped onto each other harder. This moment was too much, far too intimate to just be friends but maybe because it was more than that.
Maybe it was always just more than that, something beyond casual friendship and deep down there was possible reciprocation. 
He wasn’t helping as he let out a warm smile landing a kiss on your lips that wasn’t like the other kisses you’ve received from him before. This being more passionate and dare you say loving.
It was unclear what this would entail for you and Sunghoon but there was a desperate search for something unknown that hadn’t been completed. 
In this moment, there was an underlying fear eating at Sunghoon and it was his damn brother, Jay, in the back of his subconscious mind.
But knowing Sunghoon the way you did, you were able to feel what he felt. All his fears, worries, needs, etc. You felt them im you.
In your attempts, you allowed him to kiss you however way he pleased. Harsh tugs of your lips before becoming easier and softer letting your lips get lost in each other, memorizing the familiar world that neither of you ever wanted to leave if it wasn’t for the reason to finally address the pittering of your hearts. 
Sunghoon rested his sweaty forehead with yours when he pulled away from the kiss with a heavy pant.
Neither of you looked away and you gave a weak smile, warming his heart that he nearly slipped out the few words that tugged on his heart that he couldn’t dare say out loud at least not yet. 
Still buried inside of you, he began moving his hips again catching you off guard at the sudden movement. You were too caught up in the moment and the fluttering of your heart.
“Say my name” Sunghoon softly told, slipping fully out of your only leaving his tip in you before slamming right back into you
His previous pace came back as a carnal desire in him drove him forward, he continued the snap of his hips against you wanting to embroider himself external and internally of your entire being, he gripped onto the hand he never let go of, digging his fingers into your knuckles “Say my name princess. Fucking say it” 
You mimicked his action, digging your own fingers into his knuckles holding onto his hand for the only support you ever needed, “Sunghoon” The singular call of his full name, not his nickname of any sort but the fullest form of him snapped his breaking point as he rammed into you with the intent of making you his.
“Don’t stop. Keep saying it” He groaned, “I’ll make you all for me” Those words made you clench around him, feeling the arousal seeping out of you more that had him slipping out by just how wet you were
“All for you Sunghoon” You wailed not caring how deep down you meant those words 
“Mine…” He murmured the words to himself as it settled into the furthest crevice of his mind, “All fucking mine” His relentless ruts made your insides tingle in need as the build up in your stomach grew more
“Gonna come Hoo- Sunghoon, going to-” You cried out feeling the build up daring to snap in that moment
“Come for me princess. Cream on my cock” He roughly spoke in your ear, “Give it to me” Your walls clenched around him the closer you reach your climax, he groaned as you hugged him that made his mind zeroed on reaching his orgasm with you
His thrust got sloppy and messy as he was nearing his climax, “Almost there, just a little more princess” 
“Going to take everything I give you like how you always do” He said
Your hands holding each other’s, the sounds of his hips meeting yours, the lewd sound with the unmistakable smell of pure sex in the air surrounding the two of you was ecstasy. 
His mouth hangs opens, strained noises beginning to twist his tongue as his mind tried to catch up to his heart, “I-I L-L…”
What is he thinking? What he is so sure of saying that it’s at the tip of his tongue, ready to fall at any moment. “Fuck Princess” He deeply sighed out instead
What was he thinking of saying to you?
You felt the twitch of Sunghoon’s cock bury as far as it could as he stilled his messy thrust to allow the spurts of his cum shoot into you making you moan at the feeling prompting your own orgasm.
You covered him in your arousal as Sunghoon left all the sides of your walls covered with him.
The tightening hold on your hand, you screwed your eyes shut, your mind too hazy to pick up the sincerity of the almost said words, “So perfect for me” He said which didn’t feel right to say leaving a bitter feel in his mouth when there was something he rather say, express what his heart screamed
Because his heart knew what it felt. 
Not wanting to let go of him, you weakly wrapped your arm around him, the uncomfortable feel of your shirt bundled up over your chest didn’t bother you in the slightest as you cared about your bodies stuck together.
You felt the weak thrust he gave to push his cum further into you making you shudder through your heavy pants but when he was slipping out you tugged at his body to stop him, “Stay inside please” 
You don’t know why you suddenly spoke your mind. Usually you would’ve been okay just sleeping in his arms but this time something, you just wanted him as close to you as possible.
There was something kindled in you and you trusted Sunghoon, you knew him. Like how he always promised, he’ll take care of you.
Even when you didn’t know where, who or why you needed saving, Sunghoon would know exactly what to do and he’ll be at your beck and call. 
The exhaustion catching up to you, your eyelids felt heavy as you slipped in and out of your daze. Sunghoon drowsily chuckled, nodding his head leaving the same ticklish manner against your making you weakly giggle.
“Anything for you” He kissed the side of your face before wrapping his arms around your sore body to cradle you close to him
“Rest princess” He whispered warmly 
Your heavy eyelids finally close, allowing you to be completely surrounded by Sunghoon as you stay in his arms, his fingers making small circles on your back.
Too far deep into consciousness and unconsciousness, he whispered something so low that you weren’t able to pick up on it, but the soft place of his lips against your forehead made you smile. 
Your fatigued body rested in Sunghoon’s embrace just like how you always did. Your breath evening out as you could finally rest.
“I’ll give up everything just for you princess. Just say the word and I’m yours…” 
ᥫ᭡.
Today was an exceptionally hot humid day. Jay was supposed to be out for the rest of the day but he couldn’t bear the heat any longer, it was making him irritated so he made a u-turn to head back home deeming he could deal with everything later. 
And the moment he walked through the door, he expected to be greeted with silence as always but instead he heard fits of laughter and loud screams following the splashes of water from their pool.
He furrowed his eyebrows quickly taking off his shoes rushing over to the patio. He didn’t think anyone dared to use the pool, the wound of their mother’s death still being too deep but times are different, people change and old scars could become healed. 
He stopped dead in his tracks hearing Sunghoon raw true laughter, his eyes peeking through the small crack of the opened door to see the wide smile his brother had showing all of his teeth with his teeth like fangs peeking through.
He’s never seen Sunghoon smile like this. 
When Sunghoon disappeared from sight it brought Jay back to his senses, he made his way to the patio door prying it open, “Hoon?” 
Now Jay wasn’t sure what to expect when he pushed open the door but you were at the bottom of the list.
Sunghoon’s arms wrapped around your shoulder holding you close to him, his head resting in the crevice of your neck and shoulder, your wet clothes clinging to your body leaving little to no imagination of your figure.
Sunghoon felt chills run up his spine at the call of the nickname he hated so much. His eyes traveled up to see the horror in Jay’s face. His arms tightened around you to keep you close to him, noticing how your laughter came to a sudden stop, your shoulders tensing at Jay’s sudden appearance at the door. 
The moment you caught sight of Jay, you instantly pried off Sunghoon who was beyond reluctant to let you go but you somehow managed to succeed.
Your eyes caught Jay’s and he felt his world come to a complete stop unable to singly comprehend what you were doing in front of him, in his house with Sunghoon or even why Sunghoon had his arms wrapped around you with his head resting on your shoulder as if you were his. 
Past the quite literal horror on his face like he had seen a ghost, you could feel the sharp gaze from him staring right at you before noticing the earrings on the side of his ear and the butterfly birthmark on the side of his neck.
“Hi, you must be Sunghoon’s twin brother, Jay, right?” You don’t recall any news of Jay’s return from Sunghoon, it must’ve been a surprise for him when he went to the airport that one time
Jay tried to find any type of coherent way to form his sentence but whenever he tried to speak, it would either be muttered gibberish or straight up nothing, just like always.
You nervously gulped at the silence, adjusting your wet clothes to at least have it stick to you less as you gave an awkward smile towards him. 
Realizing that he hasn’t looked away, not even sure if he’s blinked the entire time he was staring at you. He gave a quick nod, not trusting his voice to come out.
Yet, upon seeing your awkward smile being replaced with one more genuine did he feel the flip of his heart. 
“What are you doing here?” The question directed at him brought some sense back into him to reality
Jay managed to look away from you to the harsh glare sent his way by Sunghoon. He jumped but narrowed his eyes to mimic his brother’s glare towards him because why was Sunghoon looking at him like that when it should be the other way around. 
You looked between the brothers noticing how the tension was rising higher the second neither of them spoke or looked away from each other, “Uhm-” You tried to say something, anything that could help ease the tension but Sunghoon grabbed your wrist before you could say more
“Let’s go” Sunghoon walked past his brother grabbing a discarded towel to wrap around you escorting you back into the house 
“Wait Sunghoon-” You tried to gain back your balance confused why he was acting like this in the first place so you pulled your arm away with a loud huff
You held the towel close to your body, staring at Sunghoon with confusion and seeing the look on your face caused his skin to crawl in unease. 
You turned your back to Sunghoon to look at Jay whose been watching your every move, “It’s nice to finally meet you Jay” Your smile that Sunghoon swore to be the only one to receive it was now being shown to the very person he never wanted to experience it
“It’s nice to finally meet you too…” Jay’s response was short and gentle but it felt as if there was underlying meaning behind it
You thought of how he didn’t ask for your name but Jay didn’t need to know your name. He’s already thought of it countlessly to the point that it’s engraved into his mind forever.
It wasn’t until now that he realized the dainty necklace on your neck was the same exact one on Sunghoon’s wallpaper. 
That bastard.
There was a tug at your fingers that made you look away from Jay back to see Sunghoon looking at you with pleading eyes, you let out a sigh of defeat before waving goodbye to Jay.
Pleased to finally see you walking into the house Sunghoon’s hand hovered over your back wanting to put as much distance between you and Jay as quickly as possible.
When he stepped one foot into the house, he stopped in his tracks, “Sunghoon” The usage of his full name had his head turning to the side just enough to see his brother
He knew what that call of his name meant, the challenge it raised.
Turning his head back to see you waiting inside of the house for him, he didn’t say anything, stepping into the house to leave Jay alone on the patio. Jay determined he was starting to get sick and tired of seeing the back of Sunghoon’s head. 
“Thanks for the heads up” You sneered just loud enough for Sunghoon to hear you 
Choosing not to respond, he just ushered you up to his room, closing the door behind him hoping that it was quiet enough for Jay to hear the faint click of him locking the door. 
“Why didn’t you tell me that your brother was back?” You asked earning a heavy sigh from Sunghoon who unwrapped the towel around you after finding a new change of clothes for you
“He was supposed to be gone for the rest of the day” He muttered more so himself rather than for you, “It wasn’t important for you to know so why bother telling you about useless stuff” Able to clearly hear him this time your lips tugged downwards as he handed you his clothes for you to change into
You deeply sighed taking the clothes, “That’s not the point. The point is that you tell me beforehand to avoid these type of moments” 
Sunghoon’s eyebrows creased downwards, a side tug of mouth down at your words, “Type of moments?”
The moments that made it seem like you and Sunghoon were something more than just friends who fuck, that you were his and that he was yours.
If others believe facade that surrounded you and Sunghoon then there was bo possibility of getting confused of what you are Sunghoon are.
If no one was confused then there was no way you could be confused by it. 
You should’ve been more careful of your words to avoid this topic but too caught up in it, you hadn’t realized what you were getting yourself into, “You know…” Your voice faded off unsure if you wanted to even finish the sentence
“No, I don’t know. What do you mean by it?” His already agitated voice only grew more, he wanted clarification but you kept your mouth shut placing the set of clothes on the nearest thing that could hold it, “What do you mean by it?” Sunghoon asked again which only made you regret ever saying anything
Wanting to move on from the topic you dismissed it, “Nothing Hoonie” You murmured picking up the set of clothes again to walk out of his room into the bathroom passing by the same portrait of Sunghoon and Jay hanging on the wall 
You looked at it now being able to see the portrait in its entirety. Seeing how both Sunghoon and Jay looked ahead, the same stoic and empty expression on both of their faces.
There was something Sunghoon wasn’t telling you, you knew that much but you trusted him more than you should’ve, your heart only seeing the good in him.
You just didn’t know if that was your biggest mistake.
“It’s excessive, isn’t it?” 
You whipped your head to the sudden deep voice to see Jay standing right next to you copying your stare at the large picture.
Seeing Jay without the interference of Sunghoon or the feel of any suffocating silence and tension were you then reminded of the gnawing thought. Why did Jay feel so familiar to you? 
He could feel your gaze on him and hesitantly he looked at you. Seeing you in person reminded him of just how deep in the pit he was in because of you and it was like no time had changed.
He noticed you holding a change of clothes and he could instantly tell they were Sunghoon’s and it felt like a punch to his stomach. His nails tugged into his thumb noticing the necklace peeking out of the damped shirt, “That’s a nice necklace” He softly commented 
Your fingers unintentionally played with the said necklace, softly smiling to yourself at the reminder of who gave you the necklace and the deeper meaning behind it “Thank you, it was a gift from someone…Very special to me” 
The words very special to me dreaded something in him but he tried to look past it, he knew if he questioned further he might get an answer he doesn’t like but seeing the soft smile on your face as you spoke of it, if it meant having a conversation with you, he’d be willing to put up with anything. 
“So how did you and Sunghoon meet?” 
The question made you drop your necklace to fall against your neck. It was a simple question filled with curiosity, you knew that but you feared you’d slip deeper than you wanted to.
You nibbled on the bottom of your lip trying to find the proper way to answer his question. “Well he uh…” Your throat becoming dry “We became friends through some tutoring circumstances”
You didn’t notice Jay’s frown hearing your answer. Sunghoon must’ve insisted you to become his tutor just because of who you were, to him. It made his hands ball into a hard fist.
Deep down he knew it wasn’t as simple as that, there was more to you and Sunghoon’s ‘friendship’.
Through the clench of his jaw he gave a smile, “That’s surprising to hear that” Jay mumbled making your raise an eyebrow
He knows better than to have his emotions get the best of him but why should he cover for Sunghoon? Because he was his brother? No. Jay’s morals are greater than that.
“Sunghoon was a straight A student his entire life so just to hear he needed a tutor is a little shocking…” When Jay was going to say more he stopped, he saw the innocent oblivious look in your eyes as his words were conflicted with everything you could have possibly known about Sunghoon
His eyes looked around before landing on the ground before looking back up to you. It wasn’t for Sunghoon’s sake but rather for yours. He didn’t know the full story and he couldn’t risk hurting you simply based on his assumption, which he knew deep down are to be highly true.
He sighed out a tight smile shrugging his shoulder, “It must’ve been a burnout after all those years finally catching up to him” Jay gave a comforting smile to ease your tensed shoulders
You shoulders dropped, a silent relief washing over as another moment where neither of you said anything took over until you broke the silence, “I heard you’re studying abroad, that’s amazing” You smiled making his heart twist in itself because even when you were so close, you were still out of reach
He let out an airy chuckle, tilting his head to the side enjoying the compliment you gave him because to you, it may have been something so small but to him it meant the world.
“How is it? Do you enjoy it? Where do you study? What do you study?” There was a certain gleam in your eyes after each question that made them sparkle, the curiosity you now have for him was the same that he had for you made his heart warm
But the bubble popped the moment Jay heard the click of a door opening turning to it to see Sunghoon walking out catching you and him in front of the very same picture he caught you the first time you saw it but this time, you had Jay beside you.
Sunghoon clenched his jaw in distastefulness before harshly moving his eyes from his brother onto you without saying a single word only to walk back into his room, closing the door behind him.
You deeply sighed, rubbing your forehead in some type of annoyance with Sunghoon’s confusing temper but still managing to have the greatest patiences to deal with it just because it was him.
“I think it’s time we end it here” Jay softly spoke causing you to dryly chuckle showcasing a small smile making something tickle in his brain
“Yeah, I think so too” Your eyes trailed after him as he turned around to face you with a side smile that caused your own smile to grow on your face
Instead of walking towards the bathroom, you walked towards Sunghoon’s room having Jay watch you with a deep frown. He hated that you were walking towards his brother’s room, being stuck to know that Sunghoon knew of you in ways that he dreamed of ever knowing.
“Hey” You turned hearing the soft call out to see Jay giving you a closed smile that more than enough to show a vulnerable side to him
“Next time we catch each other like that, let’s learn about each other”
ꨄ︎
It wasn’t until a few hours later that Sunghoon drove you back home, only for him to return past midnight. He was aware of Jay’s deep precision and care for his sleep schedule that he expected him to be long asleep when he returned home, but to his surprise, Jay sat dead center in the hallway, arms folded watching the door until Sunghoon walked through the door. 
“What the- What are you doing?” Sunghoon jumped back seeing the dead blank stare his brother was giving him and even more surprised to even see him up this late in the night
“You’re a fucking bastard but you already knew that, didn’t you?” The chair screeched against the tile floors as Jay stood from it, an obvious ache in his body for how long he was sitting there but there were greater things that mattered
Sunghoon’s jaw tightened watching his brother. He knew exactly what Jay meant, he expected this reaction, he worked for this very moment, this is what he wanted? But underneath the harsh glare he was being given, he saw a familiar craze, one that he knew far too well. 
He was caught off guard when Jay’s hand suddenly grabbed his collar, “How did you find out about her?” Sunghoon’s eyes widen just for a moment before dropping his initial shock to show a stoic expression instead 
He’ll gladly meet his brother halfway, to push and corner him to the edge. This wasn’t some unresolved fight between them from the past waiting to be fixed. The wound was fresh this time, open and gushing for immediate attention, “By finding and meeting her” 
Jay bit back his tongue with a shake of his head, he let out a laughing scoff before lightly shaking Sunghoon by his collar, “How did you find out about her Sunghoon?” Instead of using the usual nickname he always used to address his brother, he used his full name, this time Jay’s tone was much darker and lower than any other time he spoke to his brother
“Should’ve thrown away your pathetic diary” The mention of the sacred notebook made Jay shove his brother harshly knocking him off his balance
“You were waiting until I was gone to go through my stuff” Jay laughed almost manic as the pieces slowly fell into place, “Should’ve thrown your pathetic dignity with it when you found it” He sneered making Sunghoon scoff
Sunghoon grabbed Jay’s wrist, tightening around it to forcefully remove Jay’s hold to push him off of him, “You’re one to talk” He muttered under his breath noticing how his brother looked away from him, eyes set on the floor 
“You’re going to regret ever thinking about going near her” Jay quietly warned making Sunghoon sarcastically laugh
“Oh no, you’ll be the one going to regret coming back” Sunghoon gave a tight smile that was too menacing
“Should’ve stayed right where you were” Each word he said, the taps against Jay’s chest only grew harsher “You didn’t have to come back” Sunghoon looked at Jay’s eyes dropping the menacing smile 
Realizing now that taking the harsh approach towards Sunghoon would lead nowhere, he needed to think of anything that could make his brother realize what’s at stake, who's at stake but it hurt him.
Jay never wanted this to happen—any of it but he thinks he can live with that for the rest of his life because now it was you who was at stake, “You’re going to hurt her Hoon”
Ignoring the use of the nickname again Jay has been using ever since they were kids, those simple words made Sunghoon loosen his hold on Jay’s collar, a ringing in his ear muffled everything else around him making it feel like he was submerged in water.
His breathing became heavy, his chest rising and falling with each heave. Hurt you? He’d never dare let alone even think about it.
“I would never hurt her” He mumbled to retaliate his brother’s words, his voice growing weak
“And what do you think you’re doing? You’re using her Hoon just to get back at me because you know it’s the only way to get to me” Jay’s soft voice filled the defying silence that Sunghoon didn’t dare to break, he couldn’t defend himself to say it wasn’t true when it was nothing but the truth
But he’d never admit it, afraid of the consequences of his own actions coming to haunt him, “No… You don’t know anything! You don’t just get to swoop in and mess with my head like this”  
“Just because you didn’t get what you wanted doesn’t mean I should be deprived of what you lost” 
Jay can’t let his emotions get the best of him, he knows that but he can’t hold himself back anymore, “Sunghoon, get it through your thick skull that she is not yours to have!” He snapped
“You could never care about her nearly as much as how I care about her, you only care about getting back at me in the worst way possible” Jay harshly patted his chest, “I like her! I care about her! You don’t” 
“You only care about yourself” Jay spat making Sunghoon let out a loud laugh to stop his rant from going on anymore
Having to listen to Jay was like cats scratching a blackboard, it was driving him mad. His chest was tightening, it was getting harder to breath, “No Jay, you’re the one that needs to get it through your thick skull that it fucking hurts doesn’t it?” 
“The betrayal, the feeling of losing what could’ve been yours”
“How does it feel Jongseong?” 
When was the last time Sunghoon referred to Jay by his other name? He can’t remember.
Maybe it was when their mother was around or was it all in his head, a dream that he had that Sunghoon for once called his name warmly 
“I’m sick of having to fill the void that you left behind just to please others to reach their expectations” The conflict in Sunghoon’s mind cleared and at the end of the dark tunnel surrounding him, there stood you waiting for him with the smile he could never live without
“Did you ever think that maybe you’re the one that could never care for her the way I do?” Sunghoon raised an eyebrow seeing how his question affected Jay, how it settled in his mind as his face contorted into a sour expression
“You’re no good for her Sunghoon” Jay gritted through his teeth raising his head to meet Sunghoon’s cold gaze
Now unfazed, not a single spare of remorse in his eyes, he felt lighter, “And you’re just so perfect for her?” He asked staring directly towards his brother to get an answer out of him 
The question made Jay think. If Sunghoon, his own twin brother was no good for you, was he any better than him? He didn’t have any answer to the question. 
Sunghoon’s rested face now plastered a smug smile as he looked at Jay who was yet to say anything. He patiently waited for his brother to say anything but to his amusement, he didn’t have anything else to say.
For the first time in a long time, Jay was silenced. 
“She’s mine Jay. This time make sure to stay the fuck away” 
・・・・・
When you peered open the door, you didn’t expect to see Sunghoon. You had just seen him not even 2 hours ago after he left your place but seeing him back so soon confused you. But when he lifted his head, you saw the pure exhaustion in his eyes.
Your confused demeanor melted right then and there fully opening the door with your arms wide open for him. 
From any previous exhaustion, this was different. It was something you saw in the mirror for many years after finally breaking free from it, mostly thanks to Sunghoon.
You wondered what made him like this, now it was rare for Sunghoon to be vulnerable around others but with you, it always came naturally. 
But even still, it worried you during the very few times he got like this. 
Whenever he needed comfort, he knew he had you. You’ll welcome him into the haven he grew far too comfortable in. He just hopes it was the same for you, that whenever, wherever or however you needed him, he’d do anything in a heartbeat. 
He didn’t need to say anything, crashing his body into your welcoming one, his arms snaking to cling onto your body afraid he would lose you to the unthinkable.
Damn Jay coming in and messing with his head. He would never hurt you, never would think about it in a million years. 
You were his friend. No. You were more? You meant something to him. You held such a high value to him that Jay could never reach. He couldn’t.
You softly creased his back, immediately noticing his shoulders dropping, the loud relieved sigh coming out of him as his head dug further into your neck.
The haunting thoughts finally left him alone. Whenever he was with you, all his worries washed away.
Even though he wasn’t your boyfriend and you weren’t his girlfriend, in these moments all could be forgotten and what wasn’t remembered didn’t destroy anyone.
Yet, why did it feel so wrong to think of it like that? Even if you weren’t, you were his, there was no denying it.
He wants to be selfish for once, he wants things in life too. He’s grateful and thankful for the greatness that is you in his life.
But he wants something. He needs anything that wasn’t what the two of you already have together. Maybe soon, he can consider it.  
Even since you met, you saw him for him, not as one of his father’s notorious sons or in the shadows to be forgotten of and most certainty not as Jay’s twin brother.
You knew him in his purest form as Park Sunhoon. 
And he didn’t need the validation of his father anymore. He doesn’t need to be healed from the scars left behind from Sorin. And he most certainly doesn’t need Jay’s apologies.
All he needs is you and he’s set for life.
ᥫ᭡.
Jay pranced around his room. Sunghoon’s words played in his head on a constant loop even long after he left. She’s mine Jay. No you weren’t. 
You were meant to be his.
But instead, you only knew of his brother, not knowing a single thing about him. 
The spiral of his mind only became worse the more he thought about it. There were times, much easier times, when Sunghoon didn’t have a single clue about your existence and you were the center of Jay’s life. 
How different life could’ve been if he didn’t care and only gained the courage to go up to you back then. Maybe then he wouldn’t have to go to sleep every night picturing a life where he and Sunghoon got along. That you remained the center of his life. But he could only dream. 
He scrambled through his drawers and every single crevice of his room until he found the intacted notebook stored in the very place he left it years ago. Jay didn’t think Sunghoon had the decency of leaving it right where he found it. 
Flipping through the pages, he felt the pull of his heart strings as he read over his scribbled handwriting ranting on countless pages. Sunghoon managing to read his handwriting let alone understand it when he couldn’t even understand it himself was amusing.
There were far too many words, expressive words at that and so many uncompleted thoughts and feelings that never got shared. 
Your soft hand wrapped around his wrist, dragging him through the unfamiliar grounds of the school on his first day saving him from the consequences of arriving at the new school late. 
He never got to tell you how grateful he was for you that day, it was more than you could ever imagine.
He searched for you all over the new school grounds in hopes to find you and when he did, he thought it’d be like any regular interaction that the gratitude words would fall from his mouth easily but he couldn’t even move his body, his feet glued to the ground, his throat drying up and the palms of his hands clamping from sweat as he only looked at you from afar. 
He couldn’t even approach you without breaking down. Now times are different and he can somewhat hold a conversation with you but back then the only way he could even attempt to talk to you was through sticky notes he’d leave on your desk everyday.
It started off with simple words of affirmation telling you to have a good day, etc. but it soon grew to him leaving the notes you missed on your desk to his attempts in making you smile or even better laugh whenever he noticed your mood dropped. 
He’d take care of you the way you took care of him and it was until later he noticed his care for you changed into more, beyond just being grateful.
It was the way you would smile softly at his sticky note, quickly pocketing it before anyone could see what he wrote for your eyes only or how your eyes would drop from the lack of sleep trying your best to stay awake but would jump wide awake whenever someone managed to get your attention. 
It must be nice to experience your attention, something his own brother was able to know but not him.
When he stopped on the very last entry he ever wrote it was a reminder of his first and only unrequited heartbreak. The basket endlessly filled to the brim of things you liked, a handwritten letter which he poured his heart into and in the middle with clear bold letters, ‘May I please take you out?’.
It was meant to be given to you the day you finally knew of Jay, that you saw him for his pure dedication to you, for what he can be to you.
Yet, he stupidly got distracted. Too focused and caught up in someone else that was never meant to be his in the first place. 
Before he realized it, he already lost before he could even start.
He should’ve left the house earlier, he should’ve ignored Sorin who was waiting outside the front door. He never should’ve invited her in to catch up after so long of not seeing each other.
He should’ve done nothing.
And yet, he was leaning in to meet her halfway, to catch her lips with his even when he knew, when he fucking listened to Sunghoon confess his feelings for Sorin during the few times they every truly talked not as friends or strangers but rather as actual brothers. 
Jay has many regrets, of course he does, no one is perfect. But he sure as hell was not going to add another regret to the list. You don’t belong to Sunghoon, you weren’t his. 
You belonged with him.
You belonged to Jay. 
ꨄ︎
Jay walks over to the door, opening it after hearing the singular doorbell ring and he was surprised to see you on the other side, “Oh” Your resting face soon bloomed with a polite smile as you registered it was him 
He should’ve been happy to receive your smile, but it felt too formal, too forced. It was the smile that Sunghoon didn't receive but everyone else did.
“Hi Jay, I hope you’ve been well. I’m sorry for suddenly dropping by. I’m just looking for Sunghoon” You peered over his shoulder into the house before looking back into his eyes
Something dark consumed Jay whole and there was a recurring thought in his head that was driving him to the brink of his morals and sanity.
You always thought about Sunghoon and he believed Sunghoon didn’t think of you the way you thought of him.
It may be cruel for him to even think this but Sunghoon didn’t deserve your unconditional care and love, he was sure of it, especially not after what he was doing, why he even approached you in the first place.
You didn’t deserve it but it’ll hurt you to find out but it would only destroy you completely if he allows Sunghoon to continue on with this. To use you for his own benefit.
“He’s using you” 
You blinked rapidly trying to understand what Jay had suddenly said, “What?” You awkwardly chuckled 
“You’re too good for him” He heavily sighed, “You don’t deserve this. Any of this” 
“What are you talking about Jay..?” 
Honestly, you didn’t want to know. Your mind tells you to walk away without waiting for a response and wait in the comforts of your bubble for Sunghoon to come to you.
“I’m so sorry” Jay rubbed his forehead, clear angst forming on his face as the conflict in his head grew more 
His eyes looked up from the floor to your eyes and that is where you see the pitiful look in them. Your hands unconsciously balled into a fist, for some reason you’re always seemed on the receiving end of it.
You hated being pitied. “What are you apologizing for?” 
“Sunghoon” The single name that could make your entire word stop left Jay’s mouth, “He never needed any tutoring. He’s been a straight A student his entire life and he didn’t experience some type of burnout”
“He just said that to make you feel bad for him to have you tutor him” 
You shook your head. You came early morning to late at night just to help him study, to retain the material he was supposed to be struggling with, “With all due respect Jay, you weren’t here”
“You didn’t see him… Any of it. He was struggling, he really was” Clinging to the very hope you had left for Sunghoon you defended him even against his own brother because it’s always been you and Sunghoon
Even though you weren’t together, he must’ve felt something, anything, when you and him were together. 
Jay hoped you trusted his words over the ones that Sunghoon planted into your head but it was a losing game. “He’s a good liar”
“Why?!” You suddenly shouted, your tears rolled down your cheek, you frustratedly wiped them away, there was no reason to cry. “Tell me, why would he lie about it?” 
Jay took a moment, he wanted to console you. You shouldn’t waste tears on his brother who wasn’t worthy of them. “To piss me off” His voice barely above a whisper, “Sunghoon and I tend to clash a lot and there just some times where one of us gets what the other wants so badly”
“Why use me to get back at you? I have no value to you” You scoffed loudly but through your confusion like a montage Sunghoon flashed through your mind
His vampire smile you grew to love, the way he’d hold your body and his fingers tracing over your back, his lips that felt like they were solely made for you melting against yours.
You knew Sunghoon but creeping in the back of your head, it was starting to feel like you didn’t know him in the slightest.
Because how could you, just his friend, know him better than his own twin brother? 
You didn’t know the effect your words had on Jay's heart. You held more value to him than words could even begin to express but he couldn’t express it.
He only remained silent, unable to say anything to rebuttal your previous statement without exposing the buried feelings he’s had on you for years. 
In the silence, you looked away from Jay to the ground. It’s far too much for you. Turning your heel towards the front door you left without another word and Jay didn’t try and stop you.
This was it. You’d realize just who Sunghoon is and you’d be gone from their lives forever. A piece of dreaded it but anything was better than you and Sunghoon together. 
As you left, Jay could only watch your back before it disappeared behind the closed door. 
Your lips quivered. You didn’t know why you were crying, there was no truth to Jay’s words but deep down there was always suspicion. It was too good to be true even though you weren’t officially together.
Sunghoon was like your knight in shining armor, a haven you never seemed to be able to escape from even if you tried to leave and he didn’t mind having you there even when you weren’t his. 
He treated you like you held the utmost importance in the world but he never once said he liked you, you just assumed he did even when you never heard those words. You were the idiot that chose to believe your delusions. Actually believing Sunghoon liked you. 
What trick your mind played on you to ever think that.
ꨄ︎
Sunghoon has been staring at his phone for far too long. It’s been 5 days, almost 6 days in the next 26 minutes, 43 seconds, since you’ve last talked and this was the longest time he’s gone without seeing, texting or hearing you. 
Roughly grabbing his phone and keys, he rushed out of his room, down the stairs and out the door. He’s tired of telling himself that he’s worrying over nothing, he was going to see you. 
Around 30 minutes later, when the sound of the doorbell rang echoed throughout the house, Jay peeked his head at it before opening the door.
His resting face contorted seeing you fiddling with your fingers and at the sound of the door opening you raised your head showing your puffy red rimmed eyes just.
You cursed under your breath seeing Jay, there was a 50/50 percent chance that either of them would open the door. You just wished it were Sungoon instead of Jay though. 
Reverting your eyes somewhere else, you softly cleared your throat, wiping the imaginary tear stains off your face. You haven’t spoken since you suddenly left the house almost a week ago and you didn’t feel like talking. 
“What… What are you doing here?” Jay broke the silence taking in your disheveled state, something he used to see back then whenever you were in a down mood during school
“Is Sunghoon here?” You managed to ask
There was a quietness that was suffocating, the question hung heavy in the atmosphere, “Why are you doing this?” You looked at him after hearing his question only to see his outraged expression, “Why are you looking for him?”
You rubbed your forehead hastily, “Just tell me is he here or not?” You were exhausted and you wanted nothing more but to crash in the only comfort you knew of
You knew it was stupid but you’ll deal with Sunghoon– with everything after properly resting but for now you just wanted him to hold you the way that made you believe the unsaid things feel real. 
Jay scoffed, gaining your attention, he shook his head as he looked at you with amusement, Sunghoon had already casted his spell all over you, “Are you kidding me?”
Your arms wrapped around you in an attempt to console yourself. You looked away from Jay, unable to face him. Suddenly Jay grabbed your shoulders making the safety hold you had for yourself break apart as you stared at him with a widened expression. 
“Snap out of it” Jay realized it’s already too late, “Do you hear yourself?” 
“Why are you crawling back to him?” You roughly pushed his arm off your shoulders letting out a frustrated huff
“It doesn’t concern you Jay!” You angrily said
“Don’t you realize he’s already messed with your head? He has already hypnotized you!” He didn’t realize the build up that would soon lead to his own demise, “Why can’t you see that he is no good for you?!”
This time you scoffed loudly, “And you would know what’s good for me?” You raised an eyebrow, “Give me a break Jay” You laughed shaking your head
“At least I have a better idea than the two of you” Jay said, “He doesn’t care for you” His words were harsh, mean but it was the only way he could think would be able to get his message through 
“You deserve more, someone far better than him” There was more to Sunghoon and it was right in front of you, “I-I… I’d never do what he did to you” His voice going quieter with each word 
He wasn't sure what he was hoping to achieve but he hoped he was able to do something at least. 
“I’d cherish you the way you deserve to be” He chuckled out a faint smile before dropping it, everything was pathetic, he was pathetic. “If you were just with me from the start… You never would question anything” He said more to himself but you managed to pick up on it
You didn’t understand a single thing Jay was spewing but his words seeped through the small cracks that were bare and exposed waiting to be filled with what you longed for. 
“You’re too good for this world, far too good to be dealing with him–Any of this” Jay heaved before running a hand through his hair forcing it away from the frame of his face making you able to see it fully for the first time, “I can’t bear to have Sunghoon ruin you- Just because he could” His voice cracked with every word
Freezing hearing the break of his voice, you hesitantly pushed aside your own heightened emotions to look at Jay’s distraught state. There was more to meet the eye when it came to Jay and this was it. Built emotions finally crumbling down.
You hesitantly pulled Jay’s hand away from his hair which he easily let you but kept his eyes to the ground unable to look at you. 
“Jay” The softly calling of his name leaving from your lips made his body burn and mind hazy, he shut his eyes trying to shut away the thoughts in his mind, “Jay” The second call of his name broke him
He let out a pained noise crashing straight into your arms. You stopped, your eyes went wide at the sudden closeness but nevertheless you wrapped your arms around holding him close to you.
He shuddered, feeling the piercing touch of your touch of his body but he eased shortly afterwards. Jay clung onto your body as if he were to let go, you would disappear to his brother once again. You didn’t say anything as you held him, rubbing your hand over his back to ease him. 
You didn’t know why you felt the need to take care of him like this. It must’ve been because he was related to Sunghoon or maybe even because he reminded you of yourself. Seeing the same breakdown in him that was in you before you met Sunghoon.
He carefully pulled away from the crevice of your neck, your arms fell onto his shoulders while his hands rested on your hips.
His eyes threaded up to you, he gulped harshly feeling how the line between rationality and irrationality were blending together where he didn’t know where one began and the other ended. 
There were more said when neither of you were speaking than when the two of you spoke and that scared you.
You looked deep into Jay’s eyes and you could see how he held his entire world in there and you were dead center of it. Your mouth moved to say something, anything would suffice in this moment.
Jay’s eyes shifted from your eyes to your agape mouth and found himself looking longer than he intended to. When he looked to your eyes again, he noticed your eye trailing between his lips and eyes and like a familiar trance he found himself leaning straight in to capture your lips with his. 
With the single taste of you after longing for it for so long felt like a drink of cold water on a hot summer night. It was like a wave chilled his burning body as he was brought into the deep end already too far gone to comprehend anything. 
There was a sickening sensation in his stomach but it was overcomed with desperation for you. 
Your mouth moved with his and the hands on your waist brought you closer, meshing your body with his. Your loosened arms wrapped around his neck for support as you felt your body resting up against his.
He smiled in the kiss before carefully guiding you into the house, taking off your shoes, kicking them, discarding them somewhere near the door.
As you were led into the house you were too familiar with, there was a sensation of unsettlement. However, it was swept away in the daze you seemed to be under as you continued to kiss Jay who kissed you like a starved man having his first supper. 
Guiding you up the stairs, his lips still connected to each other as you felt him softly tug at the bottom of your lip, asking, pleading to let him in.
When you gave the slightest opening, he slipped in and explored your mouth as if he had been searching decades for it. Your hands went to the play with his hair, your feet walking backwards from his guidance. 
Yet, when you opened your eyes feeling the thug of your bottom lip through his teeth was it then did you catch sight of the familiar painting hanging in the center of the wall in the hallway.
Your eyes landed onto Sunghoon this time. It was the sudden reminder that you needed to wake up from the daze to realize what you were doing, where you were going and who was guiding you down this path. 
But Sunghoon can’t judge you. He doesn’t have the right to. He didn’t like you. You were just convenient to him whenever he needed you to be. He doesn’t care about you. He doesn’t care. He was just using you.
You screwed your eyes shut. Out of sight, out of mind.
Your hands harshly tugging at Jay’s hair as you continued to let Jay guide you to his room, walking straight past Sunghoon’s. 
The moment of entering Jay’s room was there was a switch flipped, the desperate kiss became toned down to a more sensual one, memorizing how you felt molded with his. Contrasting how Sunghoon usually is with you. 
Your legs bumped against his bed as he carefully placed you onto his bed, slotting himself in between your legs before folding them to bring you dead center of his bed as he hovered over you, never letting his lips off of yours. 
Jay’s prayers were finally answered, for the first time in his life, he was finally listened to. You softly moaned in the kiss feeling his hands running up your sides in a loving manner that easily fooled you and pulled you deeper.
Feeling the smile you pulled away only for Jay to chase after you. He wanted,needed more. He didn’t want it to end. You weren’t able to get out a single syllable as he attached his lips back onto yours.
“Why are you smiling?” You managed to say through the swollen of your lips as he continued to kiss you even past your question
“Because I’m happy” He murmured a response because it was the truth, for the first time in a long time, Jay was finally happy
He was launching himself head first into your world and that’s the highest peak of happiness he could ever achieve.
You felt the jumble of emotions rolling around you and the shivers made Jay finally pull away to look at you like you hung each and every single star in the universe. There was a loopy smile plastered on his face that made your eyes remain on him.
He stroked your face with the same fond smile, “We can take it slow” He spoke, his tone nothing louder than a whisper
You didn’t know Jay, not in the way you knew your friends, not how you knew Sunghoon but you felt a sense of security, desire and love that you hadn’t felt before from him. This was different, something new but you weren’t sure if it was real. 
But Jay was adamant on making it known you belonged right in the center of his life, with him. 
“Only if you say yes” His eyes looked deep into yours, “I’ll show you true ecstasy… One that comes from nothing but love and care” 
Your eyes searched over Jay trying so hard to find any deception but your mind leaned towards what is being offered to you, how you can be satisfied with what you’re ‘deprived’ of. 
Love.
You found it hysterical. What is love? Is it what you feel whenever you’re with Sunghoon or was it something Jay could show you? 
You weren’t sure what it was, never knowing how it felt or ever truly experiencing it, “Jay” You softly pleated clawing at his back, tears trickled in your eyes hoping that was more than enough to convey what you wanted, what you needed from him
The pure desperation written all over your face made him smile before softly chuckling. He only ever dreamed of having you, “You make me crazy over you baby” You didn’t register the nickname that rolled off his tongue so easily as his mouth captured yours in a desperate kiss
“But I need you to tell me” He murmured making your whine, the more he deprived you the more desperate you grew
“Yes! Anything- Just anything” You breathlessly spoke but your eyes never opened as you pleaded
You squealed when his hands were roaming towards the hem of your shirt only to stop. Feeling his shaky hands and hesitation, you weakly nodded your head grabbing his hand with yours to feel his cold touch against your bare stomach.
“Let me do all the work baby” He pecked a few kisses on your cheek and jaw as his hands rose higher making the goosebumps rise onto your skin
Taking in his words, you completely let your body become loose letting him take over. His head slotted next to yours as his hand reached your breast only to realize you weren’t wearing a bra.
He smirked, having his finger rub over your hardening bud, “Oh?” He whispered in your ear making you turn your head from embarrassment
His dark chuckle rumbled something in you pushing past your embarrassment as he engulfed your breast in his hand, fondling with it before his other hand bundled the rest of your shirt upwards before taking it completely off you to throw it somewhere in his room. 
You tried to cover your now exposed body but he stopped you before you could. His eyes never looked away from yours, he gave you a cheek kiss then brought his lips from your shoulder kissing the entirety of your collarbone until getting to the center only to lick in between the crevice of both of your breasts. 
Jay grumbled a satisfied rumble that tickled your skin but unable to let out a giggle you only raked your hands to his hair, your legs trying to muddle together to ignore the growing need in between your legs but there was something stopping you and it was in the shape of Jay.
He laughed noticing you growing more needy the more he took his time with you, “Plea-please” You whined making him freeze, this desperate plea shot straight to the restraint in his pants 
Popping one of your breasts into his mouth, his tongue gliding over your nipple making your body jolt at the sensation, throwing your head back into his pillows as your senses became filled with Jay. 
His free hand grasped the other breasts making sure you weren’t deprived in the slightest by him. He left your breasts covered in his saliva with the way he was messily eating it, his tongue dragged in between your breasts, unsure which side was his favorite, only to deem that both were.
Everything about you did he love. 
The clinging of your underwear became worse. With a popping sound of his mouth detaching from your breasts before trailing below your breast, leaving open mouthed kisses each stop as he lowered to your stomach until he reached the waistband of your pants. 
He looked up at you with his blown out pupils, asking for permission to let him ravish you, to let him in. Your mouth was dry, no matter how hard you tried to swallow you couldn’t, only feeling the dry scratches against your throat. You could only nod your head enough to have him looping his fingers under your belt loop before tugging them painfully to slow down. 
Your hands crumbled at his sheets under your grab as you and Jay never looked away from each other.
He pulled your pants down to your ankle before fully taking them off, only leaving you in your panties, seeing the way your legs squished together to hide yourself but he carefully put his hand on your knee, prying your legs wide open for him. The wet splotch center of your panties outlined your leaking entrance just for him. 
He felt his heart stop, his eyes zeroing on your clothed cunt and you noticed his gaze had you trying to close your legs again but he kept them opened.
He brought his head closer to your pussy making you attempt to keep him away feeling the beating of your heart in your ear the closer he got but his arms looped under your legs to keep you in place. 
A soft whimper fell from you falling deaf on his ears as he placed a long kiss on your knee before going further, deeper to your inviting self until he reached your inner thigh. Just a few centimeters away from him was paradise.
He planted a kiss on your clothed core making you jump at the contact, letting out a desperate moan in the process rocking your hips forward to his mouth wanting more.
Jay hooked his fingers around the side of your panties bringing them down, making sure to leave kisses on the bare skin being presented and with each kiss, the more he felt the hazy feeling in his mind getting worse. 
When you were completely bare, he had to take a moment to appreciate you. His eyes looked all over your exposed body for him and he burned this image forever in the depths of his brain to never forget it, not that he thought he ever could.
“You’re gorgeous” He softly muttered, his hands tracing over your bare skin trailing down to your aching core and when his long glided over your swollen bud you let out a sweet moan 
Jay could listen to you forever. Without thinking twice, he quickly brought his head to your soaping pussy, his mouth already salivating at the thought before latching onto making your mouth fall slack as you melted into his bed. 
His mouth opened wide, his tongue slurping everything to taste your arousal all over his taste buds allowing himself to get lost in it. You’re the best thing to ever happen to him.
His satisfied hummed shot directly into your core making it send a wave of pleasure into you. Your quiet moans became louder when his tongue protruded your gaping hole teasing it before dragging his tongue on your folds all the way up to your clit to suck on the bundle of nerves. 
“Wa-Please” You blabbed your head felt like it would fall off any second the more you entered in the trance making you forget everything that existed outside of Jay’s room, only focusing on him
Hearing you fueled Jay with a need to make you fall apart for him, to forget Sunghoon that already left his mark on you wanting to replace it with his own.
Jay lapped at your pussy like you were the best dessert to ever be offered to him, he didn't come up for air, he was so engrossed in your sweet cunt that he found oxygen overrated, who needed it when you were all he ever needed.
Your eyes clamp shut, the thin layer of sweat covering your body as you hold yourself back from your building orgasm, “Don’t hold back… I got you”
“Let go for me baby, I’ll take care of you” Jay slurred as best as he could continuing to take in everything that spilled out of you
Jay will take care of you. He’ll pick up in whatever Sunghoon lacked to give you.
Your hands found their way to his hair, tugging at them only to soothe his head as your whiny moans and the wet sounds of his mouth lapping at your core filled the room.
The sounds of his mouth leaving your wetness before going back in repeated like a broken record.
“Please… ‘m gon-gonna cum” Your words barely tied together as you snapped, your chest heaving as you let out a loud moan as you came all over Jay’s tongue without warning
“Sorry. Sorry” You emptily apologized for the mess you made but Jay didn’t care, why would he 
He helped ride out your high, never stopping his laps at your pussy. It wasn’t until he finally detached himself from you and did your arms landing onto your sides that he finally got a proper breath of air.
His chest rose and dropped with each pant but to see your your fucked out expression made it all worth it. 
Your eyes remained close, your body jolting from his teasing fingers at your entrance that he thought would better help ease your sensitive body.
You weakly shook your head in an attempt to save yourself from the overstimulation. He chuckled, giving one last kiss to your clit making you open your eyes to see him. 
You looked all over his eyes, the side loopy smile and the bottom half of his face glistening from your release made you cringe seeing it.
“You taste amazing baby” He praised but you didn’t expect him to easily remove his shirt, wiping away the smeared arousal on his face before throwing it somewhere to catch your lips with his
He happily groaned in the kiss. His body pressed against yours and there you felt it. The covered bulge grinding against you the more he moved, making you moan in the kiss catching his attention. 
Jay pulled away from the kiss to cup your face stroking your cheek softly with his thumb as he looked at you, the same loving gaze from the very start.
Your insides twisted and this time you were the one that grabbed the back of his neck to bring his lips back onto yours. 
With the little space you allowed him to be away from you he fiddled with his pants in one swift motion and with the spring, you felt the wet slap against your body from his hardened cock.
You pulled away from the kiss to gulp not daring to look down, simply wrapped your arms around his neck in an attempt to bring his body closer feeling the poke of his cock. 
His fingers found their way to your leaking entrance once again to gather as much of your arousal that he could before lathering it over his hard on. Smearing his precum with your arousal almost made him come right then and there but he knew it would be better inside.
“I know, baby. I know” He whispered in the shell of your ear
Jay knew something but you weren’t sure if you knew.
He hovered your body and the last thing he saw was your doe eyes looking up to him making his heart beat faster than ever.
It finally registered that this was reality, this was his reality. He no longer had to dream wondering what his life would’ve been if he had you from the start because now he did have you. 
Aligning his tip with your entrance, he let out a shaky breath “Take a deep breath for me baby” Your uneven breathing made it impossible for you to take a proper breath but when he carefully inserted himself the air got caught in your throat making a gurgling sound erupt from you
Your hands flung to his shoulders for support as he groaned, feeling the closed confinement of your wall wrapped around him. The deep breath had done nothing in preparing you to take in the daring stretching ripping you open on his thick girth.
Too big. Too wide. Too full.
Your fingers dug into his shoulder blades as he continued to slip in, tears filled your eyes as they trickled down the side. Your senses were too filled and far gone to comprehend anymore. 
Jay rested his arms over your shoulder to leverage just enough to lay his head next to yours. He kisses your salty tears away, his hand tilted your head to the side enough for his mouth to slot with yours, to distract you. 
You whimpered in the kiss as he stilled his size, feeling the contraction of your hole around him, engulfing him perfectly and he didn’t expect anything less from you.
He lowly groaned as he held your head in place as the kiss became needier, your noises muffled by his mouth while the tears fell onto his face from your eyes, “ ‘m sorry baby, so fucking sorry”
“Promise to make you feel good”
“You’re taking me so well, you’re absolutely perfect” He whispered praised into your ears as he strokes your head
The same perfect whisper in your ear by someone else. You clawed at his shoulder blades sure that you would leave indents by how you gripped him. You kept your eyes shut with the excuse in mind that you wanted the tears to stop from spilling. 
“You-You can m-move”
Jay looked at your face, your eyes closed with tear stained cheeks, your eyebrows knitting and the hold on his shoulders.
His first thrust was slow and shallow. Your loud gasp filled his ears as your fingers dug even deeper into his shoulders. He hissed quietly feeling how you took everything he gave you, “Perfect” He murmured dragging out his cock before plunging it back in
Each time he left, you sucked him right back in. Your arms wrapped around his back, feeling his muscles moving with his movements. You wrapped your legs around his waist to hold him, to have him take you away. 
The feel of your breasts squished in between along the drag of him sliding in and out of you made your head hazy, your held back moans shot into his ear.
Jay slipped his arms over your body to engulf your body like how you were doing to him. 
The meet of his hip each time releasing a splash of wetness to drip down messily filled the room the more Jay snapped his hip deeper into you. “Beautiful baby”
“The absolute best, was meant to be just for you”
“Meant to be for me” He blabbed right into your ear with each thrust following after every word
You clawed harshly at his back hearing his words, your whines becoming louder. Meant to be for who? For Jay?
“Right baby? You were meant to be mine” His sharp thrust made your body jolt after each one, “Perfect..- Fucking perfect” Any sense of control Jay had went out the window, any morals he had to reconcile with Sunghoon flushed down the drain 
But fuck. It felt so good. Too good. You were too good to him just for him to let you go back and get ruined by Sunghoon. 
Your only attention was on Jay who was providing such pleasure to you, the way your hands clawed at his skin knowing it would leave scratch marks made you feel sorry but with every grunt he let out each time you dragged his fingers across his back, you don’t think he cared. 
His hips continued to snap against you and the full pull of his cock before shoving it back into you made you too far gone to think.
When he managed to peel his body off yours just for a moment, he looked down to where you were connected. Seeing how he slipped in and out, he needed to see all of you. 
Moving enough to grab your hips as he thrusted deeper at the new position deeply into you. You threw your head back burying yourself in his pillows, turning to the side as you let out your muffled moans against them. Jay watched how your breast jumped from his harsh thrust.
His chest filled with pride but in a glimmer he caught the dainty necklace resting on your collarbone. 
It never moved from your collarbone and he felt sick. He was the one above you and yet, the necklace still laid on your bare skin like it was meant to be there.
 Sunghoon still managed to ruin this for him. He always manages to destroy everything. Jay grunted loudly, grasping the necklace and craning your neck up from his pillow.
Your eyes shot open to see him holding your necklace and like a cold bucket of water thrown, you froze. No. No. No.
Jay’s thrust became animalistic, filled with nothing but rage, jealousy, and most of all hatred. The love and care now long gone.
Your mouth fell wide open with nothing but louder moans leaving it as the sound of his hips harshly meeting yours. The familiar build up rose in your stomach and you shook your head, too much was happening and you couldn’t focus.
You tried to get him to let go of your necklace as the creeping orgasm was nearing. You couldn’t relax knowing you were about to break. But to your shock Jay’s thrust came to a sudden stop ripping your orgasm away.
Unknowingly letting out whine in your pants, you gulped harshly trying to properly breath as your eyes fluttered, the sticky feeling of your sweat covering your body as your hand tightly held Jay’s arm holding your neck up by your necklace.
Jay looked down seeing your pleading eyes looking at him, your hands weakly tightening to make him let go. 
He turned your necklace around until he found the clasp and without a second thought, he unclasped it, peeling it off your sweaty body.
There were very few times you felt your heart drop to the pit of your stomach but this had to be at the top of the list. Jay on top of you, buried deep inside of you, dangling the necklace, looking at the material like some medal.
Sunghoon really outdid himself.
He scoffed loudly, wrapping the necklace around his wrist to mimic a bracelet, he isn’t one to wear bracelets, always preferring watches but he will proudly wear it for you.
“Don’t worry baby, I‘ll buy you a new one. A much prettier one” Jay stroked the side of your face with the back of his finger to soothe you your frantic self
You stared at him in terror. You didn’t want a prettier, nicer or better necklace. 
You wanted your necklace.
He caught your lips in a haste, the kiss now filled with desperation. You’re not Sunghoon’s anymore, as if you ever were. 
In the kiss, he moved his hips picking up right where he left off with the same harsh and deep thrust that jolted your body up to burn from the fire of Jay. 
You whimper in the kiss, feeling again how deep Jay was inside of you. His hands stayed at your sides and you shivered feeling the unease flip of your stomach feeling the cold metal on his wrist against your hot body. 
When he pulled away, your hands clamped onto him for support. Your moans and wetness bounced off his walls as he continued to ram deeper into you, having his tip kiss your cervix with each thrust making you see stars.
He planted messy kisses all over your face, “My pretty baby” 
“J-Jay” 
Hearing how breathless you sounded, how you held onto him, feeling you tightening around him as if to keep him buried inside of you until the end of time, not wanting to let him go. He’d go through anything if it meant to have you like this forever. 
“Fuck baby, keep tightening around me like that” He grunted feeling you sucking him whenever he dared to pull away more than halfway, “Take me… All of me. It’s all for you”
“ ‘m close. I’m close- Plea-Please… Jay!” You moaned louder as you felt the tip of your orgasm reaching, Jay’s hips continued to slam into you
Your head was full of Jay and the orgasm that he was about to rip out of you, forgetting all about the necklace against your hips wrapped around Jay’s wrist.
“Come with me baby-”
The sounds of your pussy slouching with his cock made an obscene noise that sounded like a perfect melody to Jay. His thrust became sloppy, he was slipping further out only having to guide himself back deep into you.
You let out a lewd moan, filled with rasp and wetness as you came all over his cock, covering all around it of your release. 
“Gonna make me- Fuck baby”
“Take all of it- I give all of me to you”
Jay held you close and firm while your arms loosely wrapped around him scratching his back as your velvet walls were now painted white because of him. 
Resting his forehead against yours, your chests heaving together soon finding the same rhythm falling and rising together.
Your eyes fluttered open to see the look of pure tenderness, warmth, love. 
You shiver seeing the look in his eyes, you felt something achingly burn in you. You weren’t sure if it was the sudden emptiness of Jay slipping himself out of your sensitive core or if it was the familiar look that made your skin crawl. 
Noticing your worry filled eyes he captured your lips with his in a slow kiss. He wanted to get rid of that look in your eyes, he wanted to make you melt for him
His hands run up and down your side as your hands tingle to move as they land at the bottom of his nape playing with the hair at your fingers as your lips move together. 
“My baby” He murmured in the kiss as he let his body rest against you. His roaming hands found your back to rub it as he pulled your body to him.
This was what he had always wished for. To finally have you. 
“Rest baby” Jay pulled away just enough to whisper for you to hear 
Rest.
Yet, the locked doorknob rattled furiously followed by harsh bangs against the wood door with the beyond angry voice of Sunghoon just on the other side knowing that you were in Jay’s room, in his fucking bed. 
 “Park Jongseong open the fucking door”
——
▐ taglist: @woniefull @notevenheretbh1 @matchaeyun @definitelynotherr @wonnienyang @strxwbloody @adoredbyjay @haelahoops @love4hee @deobitifull @jayrelics @enhalxvr @roslayy @nshmrarki @jayhoonvroom @capri-cuntz @woorcve @hveanlyanqelic @nikiswifiee @m1m1-70 @bunnihhoon @lyxnneee @stormy1408 @shiningnono @enmino @jamaisunoo @femmefqtqle
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hyunebunx · 1 month ago
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⋆.˚ ᡣ𐭩 ⏖ ’ when you aren't dating but aren't just friends either (hyung line)
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⁺ 𖹭 . genre: fluff, a little bit of angst and suggestive themes!!
⁺ 𖹭 . warnings: some are talking about sex, alcohol and being intoxicated (not the boys). i think that's all idk. anyways!! if you're under 16 pls don't read this.
⁺ 𖹭 . a/n: 2022 deni kinda ate with these ngl, so of course i had to rewrite it <3 these used to be my favorite hcs i ever wrote, so i truly hope you enjoy <3. happy channie day!! maknae line here!
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𝜗୧ chan 𝜗୧
With Christopher here, things are complicated because he avoids labeling what you guys have like the plague. His work always comes first so that makes him shy away from commitment.
That doesn’t mean he doesn’t care about you. He does, a lot, and that kind of scares him, especially when he randomly starts feeling possessive over you when he knows he has no right to.
No matter how much he tries to deny it, the feelings are there and he’s always reminded of them when he catches himself treating you so much different from the other girls in his life.
You were humming in your seat, head bopping from side to side to the rhythm of the tunes on the radio. A happy bubblegum pop song, one that didn’t fail to lift your already high spirits and put you into the right mood for the long trip ahead.
“You look happy.”
Your head snaps in his direction, a big smile stretching across your face as his melodious laugh fills your ears. Chan wasn’t looking at you, giving all of his attention to the road as he drove behind Minho’s car yet his words made you giddier, just happy to be here in his presence.
“I am!” You nod, still swaying in your seat. “Thank you for taking me along, I haven’t been to the beach in ages.”
Chan hums with a smile before reaching down and gently grabbing your hand, eyes still focused on the road as he raises it to his to plant multiple, gentle kisses on your skin.
“Of course, baby.” He says, giving a final kiss to your knuckles before resting your hands next to the gear stick. “I wouldn’t even have gone on this trip without you.”
The sweet gesture along with his words made your heart skip several beats, fooling your mind into believing he actually felt the same, the scene making you resemble an actual couple. Everybody was convinced you were already dating, since affection and those small touches came so naturally in your relationship, with no awkwardness or second guessing. You and Chan have fallen into this domestic routine where you do almost everything together despite not even being together. Yet, you loved being this close to him, glued at the hip and so enamored with one another but sometimes, you wished things were clearer, to actually know what you were and weren’t. How he viewed and felt about this relationship of yours.
“Something on your mind?”
Blinking your worries away, your heart swelled in your chest when you felt him squeeze your hand lightly, a sign of the silent support and care he never shied away from providing.
Shaking your head, the smile on your face returns, albeit a bit forced. “I was just thinking about how much you must enjoy my company, that’s all.”
That got a laugh out of him, grinning from ear to ear as he continued to drive with one hand, honey orbs briefly meeting yours in the rearview mirror.
“Is that so? You really think that, huh?”
You nod, intertwining your fingers while keeping your eyes straight ahead, softly caressing his hand. “Of course. What kind of person would miss going on a long-awaited trip with his best friends just for lil’ old me?”
Then, you turn to face him, mustering enough courage to appear confident and charming with your next words.
“You must really like me, huh, Christopher?”
His hold on you tightened, almost as if he was afraid you were going to disappear if he let go. You saw him nod his head and when the car came to a stop at a red light soon after, he finally took his eyes off the road to face you fully. His gaze was soft as he watched you like you held the sun in your bare hands and for the first time, Chan hesitated for a brief moment before he leaned over the console to press his lips against yours.
The kiss was so unexpected that you gasped at the contact, giving him the perfect opportunity to slip his tongue past your lips and deepen your dance, change it all together, except he didn’t. He didn’t take things further, hand still holding yours as your lips did all the talking, moving against you in such a soft and tender way it almost brought you to tears, never experiencing such meaningful intimacy with him before.
When he pulled away, his eyes were still serious but slightly blown by your previous actions. In any other circumstances, you’d say it was lust but right now it felt like something more, an emotion that only grew and blossomed the more time you spent together. Something appropriate for your deep connection, beyond carnal desires and sighs of ecstasy.  
“I really, really do like you, Y/n. Please never forget that.”
𝜗୧ minho 𝜗୧
The jealousy is strong with this one. I mean, that’s to be expected when your relationship status is so vague and ambiguous that you guys never talk about it.
However, he’s the softest when he’s with you. It’s like all of his worries and anxieties disappear when you’re by his side.
Secretly a romantic.
“Who is she?”
Minho looks up from his place on the floor at the sound of your voice, one eyebrow rising as a sign for you to go on while he continues to stretch. When you don’t, he lets a small sigh escape him before taking matters into his own hands.
“Elaborate.”
“Who is she?” you try again, arms crossed over your chest while a frown forms across your features. “The girl that was just here. The one you were happily laughing along with.”
Oh, that girl. Minho tries to hide his smirk once he hears what you have to say, being able to sense your jealousy without even having to spare you another glance. Truth be told, he knew exactly who you were talking about from the moment you opened your mouth yet, the part of him that wanted to see you get all worked up took over and made him play dumb.
Quickly composing himself before you notice, he shrugs. “Just some girl.”
He could feel you getting annoyed by now, his nonchalance and dismissal almost making your blood boil. “Lee Minho – “
“Why do you care?”
His voice is lower, usual doe and gentle stare narrowing slightly as he looks you dead in the eyes. Abandoning his stretching, Minho then stands up and takes a stance similar to yours, towering over you. He was so close, you could feel his hot breath on your face, his scent and him as a whole not only invading all of your senses but also your personal space. Not that you minded, you never did or ever will.
Not backing down, you took a step forward as well, closing in on him while maintaining eye contact. Eye contact always made Minho weak in the knees so you never wasted any opportunity of making him a little hot under the collar. Just as expected, Minho’s body reacts almost immediately, big hands settling on your hips before pulling you flush against him. The intimacy and gentleness of the action have your initial anger vanishing, the only thing on your mind now being him and him alone.
Deciding to play along, your arms naturally gravitate around his shoulders. “Am I not allowed to care about the type of people you surround yourself with, darling?” You smile yet he sees right through you, your words filled with sarcasm and something else Minho can’t quite put his finger on. Despite your affection, this was still bothering you.
But Minho doesn’t comment on it. “Like I said, she isn’t anyone important. You shouldn’t worry your pretty little head about her.” He breaths out, wet lips hovering over yours as he speaks. And before you know it, he’s kissing you, lips coming together in a passionate kiss only Minho himself can provide.
But even as you stand there, pinned to the cold mirror while he gently nips and sucks at your neck, you can’t help but worry about it all. You weren’t his girlfriend so you were fully aware that you had no right to question him about who he was or wasn’t hanging out with. But the fact that he wasn’t willing to tell you, to reassure you like he always did made your heart ache in your chest most painfully.
𝜗୧ changbin 𝜗୧
Thinks he’s being oh so subtle about what you two have going on. Newsflash, all of the boys already know there’s more than meets the eye between you.
Very protective but not in an overbearing way.
Actually really likes you but isn’t sure if you feel the same so he doesn’t act on those feelings.
Changbin was watching you from afar, a smile playing on his lips at the sight of you animatedly talking to some classmates. You haven’t noticed him yet and his heart was almost jumping out of his chest waiting for you to do so, trying to play it cool as he leaned against his car with his arms crossed. He might’ve looked calm and composed on the outside but on the inside, he was freaking out.
You two haven’t seen each other in a bit because of his busy schedule and now that he’s got some free time, one of the first things on his bucket list was to surprise you by dropping by to your school. Changbin had a whole afternoon planned out just for the two of you, one that involved all of your favorite activities and food. A part of him was really confused by his own behavior, especially since you never had ‘the talk’ regarding your relationship but he just couldn’t help it. The urge to spoil and shower you with gifts and his undivided attention was stronger than his doubts were, as usual.
He never realized he was a romantic until he met you, and fell head over heels for your charming personality.
Breaking away from your group of friends, your eyes finally met his and immediately widened at the sight of him, just like his smile does. Your face lit up like a Christmas tree and next thing Changbin knew, you broke into a sprint in his direction, your obvious excitement making the man laugh loudly in delight. You looked so adorable running to him like that, he couldn’t wait to get you in his arms and never let go.
You were almost there when suddenly some dude decided to stop you right in your tracks, blocking your path to get your undivided attention. You were visibly taken aback as you came to an abrupt stop, your face falling as the person started talking. This made Changbin’s mood do a whole 180, wasting no time in starting to make his way over, keen on giving this dude a piece of his mind. Your smile returned as he approached, looking at him over the man’s shoulder as everything he was saying was completely lost on you, Changbin’s magnetic field pulling you in without fail.
“Sorry, uhh…” You paused, trying to recall his name before shaking your head. “My boyfriend is here so I really have to go.”
At the mention of the word ‘boyfriend’, the guy turned around to face Changbin so fast, it had him wondering how he didn’t get whiplash. Looking at him, Binnie glared as he tried to look as intimating as possible while the butterflies in his stomach were currently causing a riot over you calling him ‘your boyfriend’. Which wasn’t a hard task since he already looked as intimating as they come because of his well-built body, his mere presence causing the other man to hunch slightly.
“Okay, I-I will call you later then, Y/n.”
Changbin raised a single eyebrow, crossing his arms once again. “Me, Y/n's boyfriend, wouldn’t like that, so don’t you even dare.” He glared menacingly, almost like daring the guy to protest in some way. “Now, scram.”
That’s all the warnings the guy needed to flee, leaving without as much of a goodbye while Changbin followed him with his eyes until he was out of sight. Your sweet giggles reached his ears, melting those sharp edges before he felt you throw yourself into his arms, your own going around his neck to pull him even closer. And just like that, the butterflies were back and making him feel like a high schooler around his first ever crush. He returned the hug in an instant, strong arms wrapping around your waist before picking you up and spinning you around, the sound of your delight getting rid of all of his annoyance and stress, the best cure ever invented.
“Hello, boyfriend.” You placed several pecks on his lips when the world stopped spinning, lightly kicking your feet that were still off the ground. “I missed you.”
He wasn’t your boyfriend yet, but after today, maybe he could finally be. 
𝜗୧ hyunjin 𝜗୧
The one that’s truly wrapped around your finger even if he would never admit it out loud. He’s bewitched, mesmerized by every little thing you do and say, his eyes full of adoration as he follows your every movement, almost like a puppy.
Randomly goes: “you can sit here” and here ends up being between his legs in a room full of 7 other men.
Can never take his eyes off of you.
Everyone’s laughter was bouncing off the walls as another dare was swung around, one that had someone pull out their phone and booty call a random number while trying but failing miserably to sound sober. Speaking off, everything seemed to be funny for your intoxicated friends at this hour. From knocking over each other’s drinks to randomly kissing, they were having the time of their lives and that brought the biggest smile to your lips.
“Hyunjin.” One of your girlfriends began, getting both yours and the man that was currently sitting behind you on the floor’s attention. She had a mischievous glint in her glassy eyes, one that had you a bit worried.
“What’s your type?” she finally asked before taking another sip of her drink, smirk growing bigger by the second as she fluttered her eyelashes innocently, twirling a piece of her hair around a manicured finger. “Like I’m sure you don’t just fuck randos, they all have to fit some type of criteria, don’t they?”
“What gets Hwang Hyunjin hard?” Another one chimed in, scooting closer in interest.
And there it was. You couldn’t help but roll your eyes as all the girls started giggling, clearly very amused and intrigued by the whole situation. Granted they were drunk but since you weren’t, it was a bit harder to hide your annoyance. You and Hyunjin weren’t a couple, heck you didn’t even know what you were but he was latched onto you from behind while you sat in between his legs, strong arms hugging you to his chest. Did they have to ask something like this while you were right here?
Soon, almost all of your friends seemed to be interested in his answer, especially since Hyunjin was known for his notorious reputation with both girls and boys around campus. You finally felt him react when Changbin, who was an even louder drunk, pointed out the look on your face and got everyone staring at you two. His arms tightened slightly around you, pulling your body even closer like he was trying to merge souls while his head came to rest on your shoulder in such a way that prevented the others from seeing his lips moving.
“What do you think, baby?” He whispered, hot breath making goosebumps appear all over your skin and awakening something in you. All his attention was on you now, ignoring everything and everyone around him like he wasn’t just asked a question. As expected, their interest wasn’t piqued for long since Hyunjin didn’t react nor answer, talking among themselves once again, with some hollering and wolf whistling when they noticed him gently moving your hair out of the way to start planting wet, open-mouthed kisses on the side of your throat.
Your breath picked up at that, one of your hands moving to rest over his and intertwining your fingers while his free one sneaked under your shirt to caress the bare skin.
With one last kiss on the back of your neck, Hyunjin spoke again, his next words making your head spin and almost whimper. “Should I start telling them about how sweet your voice sounds while moaning my name? To list all of those things you do that drive me insane daily or should I just let this be our little secret?”
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youryanderedaddy · 1 month ago
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Summary: You run into your snobby ex boyfriend after a drunken party. Things go south from there. tw: female reader, hinted murder, possessive behavior, condescension, financial(?) abuse, classism
You know this is a stupid, stupid idea. Going home at God knows what time in the pitch black is never a good idea, you think drowsily, head still spinning from the last beer, but even more so when you're tired, pissed off and tipsy. You're freezing, naked shoulders wet from the chilly midnight rain - but instead of soft damp linden, you smell molden concrete and metal. You fucking hate this city. You hate the stupid, flashy, obnoxious parties for rich people, and this shitty university in the middle of nowhere, and even the scholarship that forced you into close proximity with the freakish upper class of east New Hemptison.
"Baby!" A familiar voice sinks into the muddy darkness and you have to physically restrain yourself from emptying your stomach right there on the street - and knowing your neighbours, you'd have to clean it after too. His steps fasten and soon you feel his hand gripping your shoulder to turn you around. Standing before you, glistening just like some prince from a fairy tale, is everything you despise about this town. The fact that he's perfectly prim and proper despite the pounding rain, that his teeth seem almost pearly white in the dark, that his hair is crisp and slicked away tastefully, that even now he's wearing a fucking Armani shirt with the cheesiest pair of jeans (ones you could never afford) - it makes you want to crawl back to the cave you came from, two continents away, and never look back.
"Baby, where have you been?" He sounds terribly concerned as he pulls your shivering body in for a tight bear hug, running his hands through your absolutely soaked hair - murmuring something incomprehensible to your drunken mind. "I was worried sick, missy." His voice drops slightly, but it's all for show. He's playing the part of the good boyfriend, like always - and you fell for it once, you did, but you know better now. "I called you, like, sixty eight times. And nothing." He swallows, big hands trembling around you. "Just radio silence. I thought something bad happened to y-"
"Oh, f-uucking beat it." Your patience finally snaps and you push him off swiftly, barely contained anger starting to resurface again. Today was supposed to be about you, about healing, about feeling better, but just your luck - the very problem had found you, just like always. No matter where you go, your troubles follow. "You know what you did, asshole. Don't you d-aare play innocent with m-me." You hiss drunkenly, stumbling all over your words before hitting the wall all on your own. Mathew, of course, doesn't waste the oppurtunity to get closer to you - just so he can help you regain your balance, of course. The golden boy of Saint Hemptison would never take advantage of an intoxicated girl - much less his ex girlfriend who he's still hopelessly in love with, supposedly. Right.
"Baby, please, you're drunk - you're not making any sense." The man whispers softly, placing his hand at your hip. "Let's go to the penthouse. We can talk about this in the morning when you are more aware of your thoughts."
When you're more aware of your thoughts? You almost laugh. It's quite bittersweet when it hits you that he doesn't respect you even now - maybe he never has in the duration of your miserable relationshop, that in his eyes you'll always be the poor girl in need of a white knight. Just a little trophy to show off, if a bit broken in certain spots.
"I am not going anywhere with you." You mumble, trying to calm down - to appear cold and collected, the complete opposite of what he wants you to be. "Look, I know that you're mad at me, babygirl, but I'm sure your little temper tantrum can wait until tomorrow. You know I don't like this neighbourhood. Let me take you to a safe place for the night, okay?" He reaches for your hand again, but this time you swat it away in fury.
"Who are you to act so worried about me, huh?" You can hear your voice breaking as the tears prick at your eyes - hot and shameful. Crying in front of him is the last thing you want to do, but god, it's so hard not to when this whole night has been a disaster after a disaster. You're truly at your wits' end. "After what you did? You are truly shameless." You squeal, and admittedly, it feels fucking great to finally say it.
Your former lover's face twists into an unrecognizable grimace as he watches you tear into his heart with ease - and as you turn to leave, he grabs your wrist painfully. This time something is different about his eyes - they're not longer smiling. Now they're two bottomless gray pits devoid of kindness, the same eyes you saw the night of the accident as he caressed your cold cheek with bloody knuckles.
"And what did I do, love? Hm?" He tilts your chin up by squeezing your throat, forcing you to meet his eerie gaze. Suddenly all your tipsy bravado evaporates into thin air. "Please, refresh my memory. I really can't recall the events of the past two weeks - since you've been avoiding me and all..." His fingers dig into your skin and you wince just like a kicked puppy - but he doesn't bulge an inch. Suddenly everything comes flooding back - the touches you convinced yourself were sensual, not possesive, the glances you once thought of as romantic, the constant interrogations, the strange emails, the cryptic calls, the dead roses at your door. "I couldn't sleep - or eat for that matter. I am half a man without you. I lose myself completely."
It all makes sense now. You feel like crying, because it's so crystal clear... and you've been a willing fool. You had closed your eyes, because it was easier to lie than to accept the truth bubbling just under his surface - under the dimples and the smiles, and the hundred jewelry boxes still lying unopened under your bed.
"You - you killed him! You monster!" You gasp, unable to stop your lips from uttering the lethal. You thrash around to no avail, you're stuck. "How could you? Jack was your friend!" You hide your face in the crook of his neck to stop the sobs, too scared to look at the crazed man holding you. He simply rolls his eyes, letting you soak his shirt with your pretty tears. "Don't be so dramatic - it's just some broken bones. He'll be fine... as long as he stays away from my things."
You raise your head shakily - you're drowning between hatred, fear and misery. The adrenaline is making you even more disoriented than the liquor percentage in your bloodstream.
"I am not a fucking thing for you to-" You hiccup, growing woozy as you hit weakly against his chest. The corners of his lips curl up slightly as he chuckles at the pitiful display. "For you to just own!" You keep going, cheeks purple from pent up fury - there's something tearing at your insides like you want to scream, you need it to come out, but you find yourself unable to push it off your flesh like it's been ingrained with glue and a shovel.
"You're wrong, baby. I do own you." Mathew says with the sweetest, softest voice you've heard in your life, sugary and bitter like poisonous honey. "Let's say you want to break up-"
"We already broke u-"
His eyes pierce you mid-sentence. You quickly close your mouth.
"Let's say," He repeats through gritted teeth, holding you so tightly you might just merge into one being. "That you want to break up with me." He inhales deeply, nostrils flaring. "Hypothetically. Then what? You have no place to live. I know you're staying at that shithole of a hotel down the street right now - it's filthier than a brothel, no?"
You want to say something - to argue, to scream. To tell him that he's being a rich, condescending asshole again, that you like the hotel - despite the mold and the cockroaches and the way there never seems to be hot water. Despite having to lock your door four times so you don't get assaulted in your sleep.
You say nothing.
"You don't have to confirm it. My agent tracked you down a week ago. Whatever - you'll run out of money in, approximately, 9 days." He smirks maliciously, with unhidden spite - just like a little devil. "Then what? You don't even have an address. And you know the city hall will take their sweet fucking time to help you register - if they don't make you pay a fine first." He strokes your chin cruelly. "We both know just how much they care about clueless little foreigners with less than a penny to their name." He whispers, twisting the dagger in. "Hell, they may even cut your scholarship. And. then. what." Your ex pronounces each word slowly - making sure you can understand it, feel it - fear it.
You imagine your family back at home. You can hear their voices over the phone, your mom smiling as you tell her about your day, your father asking you what you plan to do after college - whether you will still remember them, whether you'd take care of them once they have nothing left, since you took everything with you. The money, the hopes, the happiness...
"F-fuck you..." You whimper faintly, falling against him. You feel defeated, and the sharp words are all you have left. "Why are you doing this to me?" You mumble to yourself, suddenly feeling drained to the very bone. The man begins stroking your hair as he rocks you gently to the side. "Because I love you." He slowly kisses down your neck. "Because I'm the only one in this city who gives a fuck about you, and-" You can feel his smile against your burning cheek. "Because you're mine."
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catastrophicdisasters · 3 months ago
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apologies, i'm still angry abt TUA S4
so, if we take out all of the blatant issues with the season (character assassination, 'resolutions' that create more plotholes than they solve, rushed scenes that make no sense, side plots that go nowhere, raymond vanishing for no reason, etc etc), what are we left with? let's see:
fatphobia (multiple jokes made about 'chubby Diego', when David just looks hydrated and healthy)
SA played for jokes (it's clear that Klaus having sex while possessed is supposed to be funny, but he's being held hostage and forced to do this for money, when we already know he didn't even want his powers back??)
cheating
problematic / borderline problematic age gaps (either way you spin it, either Five is physically 20-26 while Lila is likely mid 40s, or Five is mentally 70s while Lila is mid 40s; Aidan was 19 while filming, and Ritu was 34)
waiting for the actor to come of age before introducing a romance (we already know what some fans can be like over Five/Aidan, this will not have helped; I would be horrified if I found out the show runners had planned a romance arc with a coworked 15 years older than me and then waited for me to turn legal age to execute it)
sexism (i was reluctant to call it that but i also don't know what else to call it - Lila basically had her agency stripped away to become the love interest two men fought over; Steve wanted Five to have a romance and didn't care who with - use Lila simply because she was there)
complete disregard of character trauma (Klaus being buried alive despite it having been mentioned in every prior season that he was locked in a mausoleum by Reginald, including literally being left to die)
possible overstepping of an actor's boundaries (i've not been able to verify this, but i've seen it said that robert sheehan has requested not to do sex scenes?) (still havent been able to prove this; wasn't an issue with other roles so... hesitant to leave it)
actors requests being ignored (David asked multiple times if the Lila cheating sideplot was required, but clearly it went ahead anyway)
bad cgi
that awful vomit montage
Reginald (im not quite calling it abuse forgiveness but uh. it's not far off tbh)
i don't even know what to call this, but basically told the Hargreeves the abuse they suffered was their fault because they shouldn't even exist??
what did i miss? (im sure there's something)
from the replies:
the song in the ep3 dance scene uses a slur for romani people (and is also about a man and an underage girl)
SA dismissal (it's literally never addressed that Allison SA'd Luther last season. like, at all. everything's just a-okay now!)
more sexism (Allison's arc was also reduced to serving men; there's a single line to explain that Ray left, with no mention of why (i could go OFF about this but this post isn't supposed to be about mishandling of characters); even after everything, all her bonding with Claire comes through Klaus's storyline. also, Sloane is just gone and nobody gives a shit - Luther has one line and that's it??)
so many issues with consent (all of the girls shown in the place Klaus works look drugged / Klaus doesn't want to be there and doing any of that, it's all against his wishes / they all get their powers back against their wishes - although they do tell Ben that wasn't his choice to make / Klaus gets his powers back against his will when Allison is pressured to do it to save his life)
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hello-eden · 3 months ago
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Unexpected Hope
Damian has been disoriented all week. When he was told that stopping the ritual would have repercussions, he did not expect this. He had been dealing with the memories on his own but unfortunately he could not postpone this gala. 
He had been stopping a ritual that would end up summoning the being he now knows as Undergrowth. Damien does not regret that choice especially now that he has the context. Unfortunately it brought back his memories of Phantom.
He didn't quite understand they were memories for quite a while honestly he was a little bit concerned he got possessed. Thankfully after some compartmentalizing and a little bit of isolation, he figured out what was wrong. It did not help the confusion that comes with being a Midwestern teen and an assassin child put into one body but he has gotten the hang of it. 
Unfortunately Damian did not get long before he was forced back into the presence of his family. he had put off many public family events in the last few months so he was not able to get out of this event. he probably could have faked being sick but he'd much prefer to be able to pass off any of his symptoms from the memories as uncomfortableness being around strangers then be alone with his family. 
He's honestly very happy with his choice after he sees her. He doesn't recognize her at first with the dark auburn braided hair and the dress being something other than black but something made him turn around when he heard her rant.
She was giving a humanitarian speech to one of the investors. At first he got closer just to hear about it. It's always funny to see the faces of the imbeciles when people don't bow to their wishes.
Damien thought he finally found someone who was not a gold digger or a social climber. What made him really stop in his tracks was her body language. It was like a neon flashing sign opened up and said ‘hey this is Sam Mason’. 
Damien walked over with hope in his chest that he was not alone. she eventually seemed to get tired of the man or maybe he was able to scramble an excuse and walk away. he couldn't quite hear but by the time he walked over there it was only her.
 “you seem to be quite passionate,” Damian says, trying to start a conversation and figuring out how to ask the hard question.
 What is he exactly supposed to say? ‘Hey, are you my best friend for my last life or hey do you remember being on my ghost hero vigilante team that ended up with all of us being Undead royalty.’
The girl looks him over, probably trying to figure out what he wants. 
“Are you here to argue?” She says angrily, obviously ready for another fight.
“Your speech reminds me of someone, have you ever heard of Samantha Mason” Damien says trying to be nonchalant.
Her eyes seem to widen and look him over again.
“Where'd you hear that name.” She ordered.
“I've heard enough of her rants to be able to pick it out from a crowd.”
 “Danny,”  She said softly her grabbing his hands and squeezing as she looked around to make sure no one saw. “what how I thought it was the only one” Hope seemed to be filling her eyes. 
“Hi Sam” Damien Whispers just as softly just as glad he is not alone. 
Without another word Sam drags them to the stairway rushing up to the floor upstairs and trying to find a room that isn't being used. She eventually finds one two floors above the room they were using for the gala and pushes him into what looks like a break room.
 “How the hell did you get your memories” Sam demands 
“Why are you yelling at me? You have your memories too obviously if you are recognizing your name” Damian says shouting back at her. 
Sam always has a way of catching him off guard. She was happy just a minute ago. 
“yeah well I did something stupid which means I know you did something stupid” Sam said pointing her finger at him.
“ Well I may have accidentally stumbled upon a ritual for summoning an ancient and when I stopped it the backlash gave me my memories back. ” Damien stumbled over their words trying to justify themselves. "What stupid thing did you do?”
“The girls in my stupid Prep School in my grade went through a very witchy phase. there was a slumber party and they were stupid enough to actually find real magic. I had a cut on my hand earlier in the day and try to freak them out by adding a little bit of my blood. apparently my protection spell is literally stuck into my soul, so things went down” Sam says just as hesitantly as Damien
 “you have zero leg to stand on okay fine we were both stupid” 
They both sat there in silence for a while, mostly just basking in each other's presents realizing they weren't alone anymore.
“it's good to have you back," Damian says, giving her a weak smile and running his hands through his hair.
He'd been trained out of all of his nervous ticks but it probably makes her more comfortable to see him just as nervous as she is.
“it's good to see you too da- do you have the same name?” both of them don't seem to realize at the same time that they didn't get each other's names. 
“Damien” he says as he pulls his hand out of his hair and puts his hand out for a handshake. 
“Sarah” she says, grabbing his hand and giving it a shake.
the two of them shake their hand for a moment before they look at each other's eyes and burst out giggling. 
Damien's really glad he decided to not pretend to be sick.
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ssahotchnerr · 1 year ago
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okay so, I really don't like angst so I'll go with jealous!Hotch 🤭
Something like when Reader is at Jack's soccer game and Idk, a dad flirts with her? But when Jack sees that she's talking with someone who isn't Hotch, he calls her "mom" in front of the dad who's flirting with her, (bc he's jealous too 🤭) but Hotch hears him and he's kind of moved, but someone is flirting with his girl so he gets all jealous and starts like kissing her or something in front of the man? And the night they end up at his home, with Hotch showing her that she belongs to him 🤭
(feel free to change anything, don't worry, also, sorry for my bad english, it's not my first language 😭)
keeping score
🤭 minors dni cw; fem!reader, jack calls reader mom, unwanted advances, suggestiveness, allusions to sex, small praise, dominant!jealous!possessive aaron 🦋 wc; 1.5k
early saturday mornings - grass still slightly wet from the dew, the sun slowly rising higher into the sky (threatening a hot day), sat alongside a soccer field - you couldn't imagine another place you'd rather be.
as aaron was the coach, you spent majority of jack's game sitting alone. it was a small price to pay; you were more than happy to cheer on jack from the sidelines, and to check aaron out as much as you wanted.
but most importantly, attending his games made you feel like you were a part of the family. the hotchners were closed off and let very few people in, and so your attendance here only solidified your role in both their lives. that aaron planned on keeping you around, and that jack trusted you. your role in his life wasn't to someday replace his mom, but rather you were just another person who simply loved him. you loved him like he was your own, and he knew it.
"mornin'," a voice pulled you from your thoughts; a familiar face amongst the other parents on the team, but you didn't know him by name.
you offered a quick, friendly smile, "good morning."
he set up camp near you, setting his foldable chair down and getting settled a few feet away. you paid him no mind, resuming your attention to something more worthy of your focus, such as how attractive aaron looked in the jeans he was wearing. and the game, obviously.
however, you could feel him peering at you from time to time, making the hair on the back of your neck stand up.
ten minutes or so passed before he spoke again, "so, big soccer fan?"
your eyes followed jack, who was dribbling the soccer ball down the field. your heart swelled with pride as he successfully kicked it to a teammate, "not until recently."
"me too." he offered you a look that he probably thought was slick, while you kept your gaze straight forward. "i'm always looking to score, if you know what i mean."
his words instantly caused your cheeks to burn, along with your whole body. it was clear he was objectifying you, with no good intentions in mind.
you didn't bother replying. hopefully, that would be a clear indicator for him to leave, or to leave you alone.
but he still chose to linger. and while he wasn't speaking, in your peripheral you kept noticing his head turn, gazing in your direction. his eyes were nearly burning a hole into you.
"shit." he swore as he suddenly stood up, picking up and moving his chair even closer to yours, "the grass is eating away at my chair. must've been that damn rain last night."
it hadn't rained last night.
the unsettling feeling he was causing you only grew, but again you didn't dare to say anything. the uncomfortableness only eased when the whistle finally blew, signaling halftime. this meant a water break and a small snack for the kids, and it meant aaron and jack would soon be joining you for a moment.
as expected, jack hurried towards you as soon as one of the other moms distributed him his snack, but paused abruptly as he reached you, his eyes scanning between you and the man. a confused expression filled his face, his bottom lip sticking out into a pout. it was the same one he produced whenever aaron gave him the fifteen minute warning for bedtime.
"mom," jack inserted himself in between the two of you, a small package of fruit snacks in hand, "can you open these for me?"
you froze for a spilt second, touched and surprised. you've been a constant in both aaron and jack's lives for almost a year now. but that title, was a first.
"of course sweet pea," you coughed a bit to clear your throat, and to stop the tears from surfacing, opening it for him.
"you did good out there kiddo," the dad spoke again, flashing a smile.
your fists clenched at that one - you knew he was trying to impress you, and you hated how he had decided to use interacting with jack to his advantage.
just wait until you find how he's the coach's son.
while you were furious, jack ever so slightly rolled his eyes, such an annoyed expression almost humorous for a child his age, choosing to focus on his snack and leaning comfortably against your shoulder.
and a minute or two later, aaron joined.
as aaron approached, his face nearly pulled into the same expression as his son's as he analyzed the visual in front of him. only his was accompanied with a more hardened, possessive aggressiveness.
"hi sweetheart," aaron greeted you, leaning in to kiss you once you were on your feet. it wasn't a chaste peck either, but rather more showy. his fingers grasped onto the waistline of your pants, pulling you flush to him. "enjoying the game?"
you nodded, still recovering from the unexpected heated kiss, looking down at jack who also was glued to your side, offering protection of his very own. you gave him a smile, ruffling his hair gently, "i think we've got a soccer star on our hands."
"speaking of," aaron started, straightening his torso and squaring his shoulders, making him appear taller. "jack, why don't you join the others. they're taking turns aiming at the goal before the game resumes."
with a nod, and after handing you the empty wrapper, jack ran off to his teammates. aaron was still holding his menacing glare, but dropped the entire expression suddenly.
"how are you feeling?"
"feeling...?" your eyebrows quirked in confusion.
"you're not too sore today, aren't you?" his eyes darted behind you, a rather confident, fiery glint within them. "i wasn't holding back last night, was i?"
oh.
"and now that i'm thinking about it, i don't think you've ever been that loud either."
aaron had always been a stickler for pda; any displays were kept to quick kisses, hand holding, and any suggestive comments were kept to a murmur, meant for you and you only. even when you tagged along with him to bau outings, such as a bar on a saturday night, he held back. anything more was private, and aaron preferred it that way - him being the only one to witness you in such a vulnerable state, was something he took gratification in, and only added to his overall pleasure.
so this, was something else. he wasn't speaking loud enough for all to hear, just enough for the man in question. your back was towards him, so you had no idea how he was reacting to aaron's words.
"i'm fine." you managed, your body also reacting immediately.
aaron's lips found home behind your ear, again conscience of his volume - just loud enough. "good, because i'm not done with you yet."
aaron's hand slid up to the small of your back, but not without stopping on the curve of your ass first - again he wasn't subtle about it, making sure it was noticeable.
and it had to be working, for the man hadn't uttered a single word.
"and actually, sweetheart." another glare pointed behind you. "would you mind helping me at the bench for the rest of the game? i could use an extra set of hands."
"of course." you blurted out, complying without a second thought.
"good girl," he was heavy on the emphasis, patting your hip affectionately. "c'mon."
you were visually flustered as you leaned down to gather your belongings, especially when aaron's hand rested on the small of your back as you did so. your eyes lifted to the man, who was avoiding all eye contact, staring off into the field with a flushed face.
once you straightened up aaron took your hand, leading you away.
"thank you." you mumbled as your hand slid up his arm, giving his bicep a squeeze.
aaron's jaw clenched. "i fucking hated the way he was looking at you."
"you wouldn't like what he was saying either." you mumbled, causing aaron's nostrils to flare in anger. but to calm him, you changed the subject, heat filling your cheeks again, "and you."
a pleased, closed lip smile graced his face. "what about me?"
"what was all that?" you teased, stomach fluttering. you already knew the answer, but it was something you wanted to hear from him again. "i've never heard you, so..."
he chuckled softly, an almost embarrassing undertone to his words. "vocal?"
"yeah." you blurted out, blinking. "it was hot."
aaron shrugged, satisfied but still agitated. "he was devouring you, practically undressing you with his eyes."
"well, i don't think he'll be trying anything again."
"i know he won't," aaron's eyes darkened as his overly confident demeanor resurfaced, his lips pulling into a smirk as one of his fingers tapped your neck, "especially when he sees you next week. because you won't be covering up those marks."
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oldmenthusiast · 21 days ago
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18+ content mdni
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bookshop owner!joel miller x fem plus size reader
warnings: smut, age gap, tension, reader is in her 20s and joel in his 50s, semi public sex, reader wears glasses, not proofread
it takes many job interviews for joel to hire someone until he finds you. you're not the first young thing to apply for the job, not the most qualified either but joel likes how modest you are.
he also likes the way you avoid his gaze if he stares too long, or how you keep pushing your glasses every time they slide down your nose.
those aren't the only things he notices about you because he's become very observant due to his age; it definitely doesn't have to do with some strange infatuation over you, no.
when your hands firmly pull your sundress down if it's too windy, when you smack your own forehead if you mix up the order of the books before switching them again. joel notices that too but it doesn't necessarily mean anything.
“I’ve taken care of the online orders, mister miller.” you inform him as sweet as ever and joel’s crooked smile appears on instinct.
“thank you, sweetheart. you know how people my age are with those machines.”
you're kind enough to shake your head at his response.
“I think you're doing great,sir.” you tell him and it warms his cold heart to the core.
“go home, sugar. I'll close up soon.” he mutters with the same half smile and watches you go but not without wishing him a good day.
during peak season, the bookshop gets naturally busy but to the point where joel and you have to stay overtime.
he doesn't ask it of you but you insist.
“I can't let you do all that by yourself.” you mutter with a faint pout that he wants to kiss away.
“can’t pay you for overtime,sugar—”
“just let me do this for you,sir.” you cut him off and joel doesn't argue further.
that's how his following nights go. you sit together in the back of the store, tons of books and papers surrounding you as you work. you assist him with every single thing he needs and even if you lack knowledge in some parts, you learn it for him.
peak season ends, the bookshop is quiet and your shift ends but you somehow still sit at the back of the store instead of going home. joel sits across you while holding a bottle of beer in his hand.
“a girl your age should go out with friends and have fun, not rot in here with me.” joel tells you with a hint of amusement in his tone.
even if he's right, you do not agree.
“I like it here, it's peaceful..” you explain and as usual your gaze doesn't linger on his. you look away when joel doesn't and it makes the man smile.
“I like it too.” he mutters after a while and tips his head back to down the rest of his beer.
there's hidden intent behind his reply, or maybe just the feeling of wanting to say something more, but joel keeps quiet. whether you notice it or no, you don't say.
joel doesn't pride himself to be the best boss but at least he's a good enough one. that's what he tells himself when your most recent ex partner marches in his bookshop to cause a scene but joel sends him back with a bruised eye and some vulgar words.
it's probably the first time someone has stood up for you like that but it's more special because it comes from joel.
whether it's out of gratitude or suppressed emotions, joel thanks whatever high power has led him to the back of the store again with his body slumped on his chair and you straddling his lap.
“mister miller.” you moan as you sink down his cock, taking him inch by inch until you're fuller than ever.
his calloused hands wrap around your plush thighs and fondle the skin greedily, loving how it spills between his fingers. whatever you're not proud of, joel touches it like it's a treasure.
“I’m a man, not a boy.” he growls when you hesitate to move on him, afraid of crushing him beneath your weight. “fuck yourself on my cock, baby. come on.” one of his hands slaps your ass possessively and his words alone are good enough to give you the confidence that you lack.
once you start moving, it's over for him.
his thighs flex beneath your weight and his cock twitches within you as you ride him, taking him in so perfect.
“so good. my sweet girl. my favourite girl.” he whispers against your cheek and you melt while swaying your hips faster.
his hands clutch harder at your thighs as you bounce on his cock, buzzing with heat and need for more.
the sound of skin slapping, as well as the wet noises that emit with each slide of joel’s hardened cock inside your folds makes everything better. “so wet. you're coating my cock with it, sugar.” he says through gritted teeth as his fingers dig harder into the skin of your ass.
he slaps it once, then twice.
“mister miller!” you cry out when a particularly hard thrust is delivered straight into your sweet spot.
joel buries his face into your neck and grunts as your walls tighten around his cock, claiming his every inch. “so sensitive. bet your boyfriend didn't know how to fuck like this.” and he's probably right by the way your pussy drools and squeezes around him, sucking him in for more.
his lips find your neck and he marks it unapologetically, biting and sucking on whatever skin his mouth can reach.
when he pulls away and presses his back against the creaking chair he's graced by a sight better than any other.
joel watches you ride him, stares as your tits bounce before his face and your crooked glasses struggle to exist because of the force of his thrusts below you.
he definitely can't last long after that and he uses his strength to shove you on the table and tower over you. only then does he realize the pathetic state of your sundress, butchered up around your waist like it's a belt. he slides his cock inside you again and you whimper softly.
“knew you were made for me ever since you walked through that door.” joel growls while fondling your breasts with both hands, his mouth merely occupied with the tender skin on them.
your hands reach for him, gripping the back of his shirt as he fucks you. you're not used to being given things, only to give them yourself. and this much pleasure is overwhelming but it's good because it's joel giving it.
a particular shift of his hips helps him to slide deeper and the sensation causes you both to moan in unison.
“I won’t last, sweet girl.” he croaks between the space of your breasts while sucking one of your nipples into his mouth.
you can say the same as the stimulation brings you closer to the edge and your eyes can barely stay open at some point.
his hips follow a fast and intrusive pace, and every time joel’s hips collide against the back of your thighs it makes your skin jiggle. you feel embarrassed but not for long as joel drags his lips against yours.
“the prettiest girl. there's nothing better than you, sweetheart.” joel whispers and you kiss him before he does.
your mouths melt so perfectly, your noses brushing intimately, and if joel could bring you any closer he would.
“there.” you beg against his lips when the tip of his cock hits that perfect spot within you.
“here?” he asks teasingly and makes his thrusts purposely rougher. your legs shake around him and he does it again. and again. and again.
the bookshop is filled with your cries and begging. “i’m coming— I can't—” you mumble incoherently but joel gets it as he speeds it up.
you watch his hand disappear between your bodies and you don't question it until you feel that excellent brush of fingers against your clit, accompanied by his savage thrusts into your weeping pussy.
“joel.” his informal name falls off your lips so well and he has to remind himself to breath when you say it as you come around his cock with a cry.
it takes everything in him to not spill everything within you right there.
“where? where, baby?” he asks as he grounds his hips and hopes you'll get it.
“I'm on the pill.” you so graciously tell him while squeezing your thighs around his waist and joel nearly says thank you because of what a desperate bastard he is.
it only takes a few more thrusts for him to let go and come inside you, his hands abandoning your breasts to pull you down by your hips.
your eyes roll to the back of your head as you feel every drop pour into you and fill you up. it briefly shocks you that he's still coming — he's still filling you up with his seed and groaning against you.
“there’s so much.” you mutter breathlessly as he nuzzles his face against yours. joel simply hums and uses one of his hands to caress the bare side of your hip, keeping you relaxed.
“we’re not opening tomorrow.” he tells you in his usual tone of authority.
“it’s thursday.” you tell him.
“good day to go out and eat,yeah?” joel pulls back enough to look at you and he stares at you knowingly. his words bring a smile to your lips, one that he wants to treasure forever.
you nod then, giving him your acceptance.
“yeah. it is a good day to eat out.” his hand moves from your hip to fix your crooked glasses with a fond expression. the glint in his eyes speaks louder than any sentence.
“maybe you should keep your calendar empty for this month. or year.” his words amuse you but you're aware that it's far from a joke — he isn't asking. your eyes regard him as gently as always and you smile that way just for him. “yes mister miller.”
he was glad to have hired you.
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fairene · 5 months ago
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one of your girls / ln4, part two
lando norrisxfem!reader
no use of y/n, as always.
part one
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a/n ⋯ I LIED IT'S COMING OUT NOW!!! i sat down for 'bout four hours after work and a family dinner to knock this the fuck OUTTTT. it's shorter than i expected, but this was the best way i could wrap up this supposed 'oneshot'. i hope you all enjoy it. and remember, it is up to YOU for what you are wearing, clothes are intentionally vaguely described for your own viewing pleasure. and tbh, i did not proof read this...don't sue me!!! I JUST WAnted it out asap for everyone@!!! pls don't let it flop!!!
warnings ⋯ SMUT 18+++!!! minors DNI!!!, language, drunk hookup, choking (slight), p in v sex (wrap before you tap!), fingering!(f)receiving, overstimulation, feral lando. sickeningly in love lando, possession, jealousy.
wc ⋯ 13.7k (unedited!)
he hadn’t heard from you in weeks. weeks. it was driving him fucking insane. he didn’t know that the girl would come back, he didn’t know she would be a bitch, and he certainly didn’t know you would react that way. to his ultimate surprise, it was a comfort knowing that you did care. however sick and twisted it was, it told him without using your words, that you wanted something. 
things had been left unsaid between the pair of you for a long time. too long. he was never in the business of guessing your feelings, assuming that you felt one way or another about him. and neither were you. both of you were too fucking stubborn for your own good. neither of you could see what was right in front of you–
each other. 
and that was the worst part for lando. it had him pushing himself harder. faster. to be better to perhaps catch your attention. to win you back through his ability to race. but you didn’t care about that. you didn’t care about how fast he drove his car, didn’t care about the number of podiums he got. you cared about him. but you never let the words fall upon his ears, and that was your first mistake. 
it was the weekend in spain. warm, but not too humid, you traveled with alexandra and the rest of the ferrari hospitality team. you had gotten close to carlos’ girlfriend, rebecca, as well. they were both great company and more times than not, lando had slipped from your mind completely. 
but not for him. 
he was a mess. a wreck without you. guilt consumed him night and day, and he would feel eternally wrought with what could have been. he’s called you, texted you, even had oscar reach out to you, but there was nothing but radio silence and the bolded words ‘read’ beneath his sent messages. it hurt more knowing that you saw him suffering and did nothing about it. 
but he deserved it. he deserved this treatment. he wasn’t going to fight you. he would roll over, belly up like a good boy for you. pay attention to me, his actions would scream. look in my direction. but you didn’t even view his stories on social media anymore. didn’t even like his posts. 
the british driver would be found pacing back and forth, staring hunchback at his phone. oscar would watch him from across the room, legs dangling from the papaya barstool. he hated to see lando this way, but he knew what he did. lando was honest with oscar, hoping to maybe seek advice in his own girlfriend. but lily simply shrugged her shoulders and her expression said enough. 
you did this to yourself. 
but little did you know is that he threw that girl out the moment you left. okay, not literally, but in ever metaphoric way possible. he never contacted her again. he hadn’t contacted any girl, in fact, these past few weeks. he would be isolated with his PR team at every occasion, refusing to even entertain the thought of hitting up a new girl. 
his loyalty to you was suddenly unwavering, but it was too late. 
“mate,” oscar said from where he sat. lando didn’t look up, just hummed, staring at your last text to him. 
‘you’re too sweet,’ 
too sweet. what would you say now? you had replied to a set of merchandise he saved for you, special edition for miami’s grand prix, and that had been it. from you. he had to scroll down through the text chain to reach the bottom. his endless apologies, desperate words, and more apologies. he felt nauseous. sick that he ever treated you that way.
his favorite girl. his girl. 
“she’s here.” 
what? 
lando’s head snapped up, looking frantically around. but there was no sign of you. 
“with alexandra. ferrari paddock.” oscar gestured his phone towards lando. he snatched it from him, letting his eyes fly across the photo. it was a picture of you, rebecca, and alexandra. posted on alexandra’s instagram story. 
you looked…
happy. 
he…
he didn’t know why he was upset by that. he wanted you to feel the same level of anger, sadness, distress, even. but here you were– looking absolutely beautiful with your bright smile. so fucking beautiful. he remembers he was there when you picked out that top. and god, he was right, it’s meant for you. 
lando threw oscar’s phone back at him, and knew this would be a long fucking weekend. 
barcelona’s air had been clean. much cleaner than miami, new york. the decor of the paddock, too, had you thinking and trailing your fingers over the textures. you had done that more– feeling the things around you. you used to do that with lando. but now he was gone, and you had to suffice to other obscurities to lay your fingers upon. 
gone. the word echoed in the chasm of your mind. gone. you didn’t realize the depth of lando’s absence would impact you this much, but that had been a mistake on your part. clearly. an oversight of your intimate relationship. that, eventually, it would end. it would end in flames, crash and burn, and ultimately never recover. as much as you thought, anyways. 
you heard your name being called from the other side of the couch. you glanced up. 
rebecca stared at you expectedly. 
“sorry,” you breathed. “what did you say?” 
rebecca huffed, but repeated herself regardless. “i said that i have a friend with me i want you to meet.” you raised your brows quizzically. “i think you’ll like him.” 
him? him? oh, fuck, here we go. 
as much as you wanted  to breeze past what happened in lando’s monaco apartment, you couldn’t. your feelings, as heavy as they were, weighed you down into the abyss of lando norris’ wellbeing. 
you didn’t sleep with anyone since him. you couldn’t bring yourself to do it. it didn’t feel right, and your own attempt at an orgasm was ultimately futile. 
but you said nothing when rebecca turned, pulling a man from conversation with carlos. he looked confused, but let his eyes settle on you. he relaxed. 
he was a handsome chap. dark hair, dark eyes. tanned skin. fit. he had a grecian nose, one that was slim and curved. not like lando’s, you thought, but brought yourself down to earth and stood. you greeted him with two kisses on the cheek, and his name was raphael. 
“so you are…” his spanish accent was thick and attractive. you couldn’t deny that. “friends with rebecca?”
“that’s right.” you nodded, bringing a bottle of water to your lips to cool down. “you, as well?” 
he shrugged, giving you a ‘so-so’ hand gesture. “carlos, really,” you let out a soft ‘ahh’ and soon realized, too, that this would be a long fucking weekend. 
the day of free practices came and went. so did your time with raphael. he wasn’t a bad conversationalist whatsoever, you were simply not interested. but you made a promise to rebecca this weekend that you would try. try and branch out instead of looking insatiably bored on live television. she was right. you needed to get over this and move on, because lando must’ve, right? he must’ve slept with that girl, given the fact that he didn’t go after you. 
did you expect him to? 
you weren’t sure. you weren’t fucking sure of anything. you weren’t a mindreader for fucks sake. but you saw his text messages. all of them. you made yourself sick with despair every night, rereading them to yourself like the fucking bible. what did you expect him to do for you? crucify himself? maybe. just maybe. 
as you were walking down the pit lane with alexandra at your side, you felt the wafting air of an oncoming storm of people. you glanced around, but alexandra was the one to point it out. 
“uh oh.” 
the papaya suits could be seen from anywhere. it’s not like they were subtle. 
you bristled and stood up straight. fuck, okay. this was happening. he’s walking this way. was he coming toward you? no, don’t be so foolish. but you hoped that he would. 
lando was approaching you, but his eyes were set forward. but when you weren’t bothering to look, he had been staring at you the entire way here. he could spot you from miles away with your countenance, your undying beauty. 
but he didn’t stop to look at you. 
you didn’t either. 
but your hands–
god your hands
they brushed past one another when he swept past your shoulder. his pinky desperately latching to yours before you let him go. you gasped lowly and he heard it, his ears twitching with the sound. but he didn’t stop. he couldn’t.��
if he stopped to turn, he would kiss you out in the open. 
you dared him to.
but you both kept on your way, and the interaction had you fuming. why can’t he care to show up? texts, calls, whatever, didn’t compare to the ability to show up. you knew he was in monaco. you knew exactly when he was there. it wasn’t a fucking secret. 
fuck him.
you didn’t care if you were being a brat. you knew what you put at stake, but you opened your heart to him. and you believed that maybe, just maybe, if that girl hadn’t interrupted, the two of you would be in a very different situation. maybe. but you didn’t let that thought linger. you couldn’t. 
“what was that?” alexandra whispered to you as you both kept walking. 
“nothing.” 
and that’s what you promised yourself it to be. nothing. when in reality, it had been everything. lando had seen you, spotted you from what felt like a mile away with a man lingering at your side. fuck. reality set in for him that you were looking. you were looking elsewhere from him for companionship. it made him fucking sick to his stomach, and he knew that had to change. he was a man on a mission now, a conqueror ready to pillage. 
it was the evening when you found yourself locked away in your hotel room. it was well past ten o’clock, and you were exhausted form today. alexandra had invited you out, but you just couldn’t bring yourself. rebecca prodded away at you, too, insisting that you and raphael hit it off today. he said that he wanted to see you again.
you had thought about it. you really did. 
but you couldn’t. 
you’d been sucked into a tv melodrama in your hotel room when you felt your phone vibrate. someone was calling you. 
you checked the time and raised a brow, lifting your phone to see the all-too-familiar contact card lighting up your face in the ambient lighting of the room. 
lando
you hesitated. 
suddenly your heart was racing, beating rapidly against the cage of your chest, and you felt like a prisoner to your anxiety. you felt it drop to your stomach, feeling queasy, but hit ‘answer call’ anyways. you lifted your phone to your ear, and let out a soft breath. 
“what?” 
your words were bitter, but quiet in the solitude of your room.
“didn’t think you’d answer,” came his raspy voice from the other end. he was breathless, as if he had been running. or fucking some girl. fuck you, you wanted to bite out, but held your tongue. 
“neither did i.” 
that earned you a cheeky laugh from him. he hesitated, too, before breathing. “are you at your hotel?”
you were confused by the question. “yes.” 
“can i see you?” 
his words hit you hard. you fell back against the pillows of your bed, hand coming to rest over your forehead. you sighed with a grumble. “i don’t think that’s a good idea.” 
you could practically feel him wince through the phone. 
“please.”
fuck him and his soft words. his desperate tone, the pity that you felt for him grew. the fact of the matter flew from your head, disappearing with a singular plead from his cracked vocals. he sounded honest. that he truly wanted to see you, and a small part of you wished to reconcile whatever was happening between the two of you. you were not a woman of small touches– you wanted it all, or nothing. 
“okay.”
lando cleared his throat, choking on his breath, exhibiting his initial shock. “i– okay, okay, what room are you in?” 
“610.”
he hung up before you could let out a breath. your phone fell onto your nightwear– a simple baggy shirt and spandex. they were what kept you most comfortable at night. 
your hands raked over your face, pulling your eyelids with it. what were you doing? engaging with him, talking with him over the phone. the long text chains of read messages you had banished him to sat idly on your screen, staring you down with an ambivalence that you quivered before. was this a mistake? should you just pretend you’re–
there was a knock at your door seconds into your thoughts. 
you jumped from your bed, hands raking through your hair. how did he get here so fucking quick? you scrambled around your room, checking yourself in any reflection you could find. fuck, why were you so nervous? how could he possibly make you so riddled with anxiety in a matter of seconds? your heart was in overdrive once again, and you wondered just how much you could take. 
he said your name through the door. weak, pining. you dropped the brush you grabbed in the bathroom instantly, feet soaring over the hardwood floor to open it. when you did, you were face to face with the british driver. 
he wasn’t drunk. that’s a first. the thought crossed your mind only briefly, thinking that you were just a booty call in the late hours of the night. it wouldn’t be the first time. 
lando was disheveled, messy, and the white shirt he wore was ruffled. upon his head was a mclaren hat, concealing his identity from the outside. most importantly, though, that you noticed was how his face was glazed in a sheath of sweat. you cocked a brow at him. 
“did you run here?”
lando shrugged. it felt, in that moment, that things were normal between you two. that all of this…shit washed over for just a second. you felt at home. comfortable. but you cleared your throat and let him walk in, shutting the door behind you. 
you didn’t want to speak to him here. not where he could see your laundry everywhere, pairs of underwear sprawled around so he’d get distracted. not that you expected to fuck him here, though the thought didn’t upset you. fuck, you were in deep. 
you brushed past him, leading him to the small terrace just outside your bedroom. you slid the door open and leaned your back against the railing. he slid the door shut behind the two of you, and he took a seat in one of the wooden picnic chairs. he gawked at you, openly, letting his eyes run over your bare legs beneath the oversized shirt. 
“don’t do that.” you said, breaking the silence between you two. you seemed to rip him out of his dreamscape with a clearing of his throat. 
“do what?” he feigned innocence. though he knew what he was doing. he missed you, lest he verbalize that. 
“look at me,” you breathed, “like that.” 
his brow lifted, still playing dumb. dumb, as if he didn’t want to take you over this railing, ask you to be his. 
“like what?”
you scoffed. 
“like you’re in love with me.” 
ouch. your words bit harder than he thought they would, blood gushing from an open wound in his heart. he let your words settle before he leaned back in the chair, legs spreading as he fiddled with the skin of his thumbs. 
“i wanted to see you.” 
“i know,” you answered. “you saw me. now what?” 
lando shook his head. “don’t do that.” please don’t do that he wanted to say. 
“do what?” it was your turn to play dumb. your turn to pretend that you weren’t doing the same thing. pushing him away was the easiest way to deal with all of your problems. 
“act so cold.” he turned his head away from you, glancing over towards the lights of the city. “giving me frostbite.” 
“lando, what–”
“i’m sorry.” 
huh? you froze, eyes widening as you straightened upright. did you hear him correctly? it wouldn’t be the first time you’ve heard an apology. but this was a first to hear it in person, not in begging text messages half way across the world. 
“what–?”
“for everything. i’m sorry.” his head fell to his hands as he leaned over, gripping at the curls atop his head. you felt the same urge creeping up your spine, your hands feeling empty. you shifted on your feet, stepping a foot closer. 
“why now?”
he perked up, wondering what you meant. 
“why, now, are you sorry?” 
he was speechless. unable to form the words that could answer such a  vague question. but you had an idea, so you thought you’d share. 
“because i was with someone?” raphael. you know that he saw the two of you talking. chatting. maybe an occasional giggle so you could keep him quiet for the rest of the free practices. 
lando began to shake his head. “no, no–” 
“really?”
you stepped into his space, wedging yourself between his thighs. he stared up at you, lost in the reflection of your eyes beneath the starlit sky. his hands found your hips and you let him keep them there, at least for the moment. 
“really.” he promised you. head leaning forward to rest on your stomach. you felt the perch of his nose dig into your skin. your head leaned back, taking a large breath, feeling tears begin to well. 
“what do you want, then?” you said with a shaky breath. 
you felt his hands tense against your hips. 
“i don’t know.” his words were muffled, but you could make them out. it shattered you to hear the creak in his voice, but it hurt even more knowing that he didn’t know. you wanted something with him. a relationship. but he didn’t feel the same.
your fingers cupped his face, bringing him to look at you. “that’s it, then, huh?” your voice was dangerously soft. 
he was confused. again. 
“that’s all i’ll be?” he still didn’t catch on, too busy staring at your flushed face, reddened eyes. he wanted to fix it– take back his words. he’d do anything to reverse time. would do anything to revoke the words that spilled from your pretty lips. 
“one of your girls.”
you pushed him away, walking back to the railing with your back turned. he said your name over and over. you ignored him.
“i think,” you said, sucking in a tight breath to calm the storm of emotions that were threatening to raise hell. “that you should go.” 
“no, no–” lando stood, coming to wrap his arms around you, but you turned, holding up your hand to stop your advances. 
“we knew this would happen one day, didn’t we?” you reaffirmed, steadying your breaths the best that you could. but it was difficult. nothing about this was easy. but it had to be done. you were done waiting. done pining for someone that did not feel the same. did not burn the same. 
lando breathed your name again. you shook your head. “no. no. we can’t–” you choked on your tears. it felt hard to breathe. “i can’t keep waiting for you.” 
lando’s own eyes filled with tears. it felt like a breakup, when you two were clearly never together. you made that clear enough, and he obeyed, just wishing to feel your skin beneath his fingers, fall asleep to your heart beat. so why did he say he didn’t know? fuck, he’s such an asshole. he couldn’t take back his words now, could he? 
he tried to explain. words stumbled from his lips, nervous and riling with anxiety, but you would hear none of it. you simply brushed past him and into your room, opening the door from your hotel room for him. you said nothing else, tears sliding down your cheeks, lip caught between your teeth. 
“please,” he begged one last time. he had succumbed to his tears, too, cheeks flushed and lip wet. his hands trembled as he made one last attempt to cup your face. you let him. 
your foreheads met in both desperation and exhaustion. here, it felt like time stopped. the two of you in sync with your racing hearts, trembling hands, voracious blood churning through your veins. you looked up at him through your wet lashes and he met your gaze. it only had you sobbing harder. 
he wiped the tears from your cheeks. 
“please,” he said your name on his trembling tongue. the sound had your knees trembling, but you resisted. you had to. you couldn’t keep doing this anymore. there was a life out there, waiting for you to take hold of. “don’t make me go.” 
you let out a shaky breath, shaking your head. 
“you have to.” 
lando hiccuped. his fingers were still shaking, and he finally accepted your rejection. though he supposed he signified it first. that was his first mistake. he couldn’t take back his words without sounding like a dick, so he was trapped. trapped utterly in this pit of mayhem. 
he exited your hotel room with his tail between his legs. defeated. 
you shut the door behind him and slumped against it, your back sliding down until you hit the floor. your head fell into your hands as you attempted to stifle your sobs. 
little did you know, that he had done the same thing, fallen limp against your hotel room door. your sobs were in unison as you began to unravel, whilst he coiled into knots. forever entwined amidst your inability to be vulnerable with one another. toilsome, but ultimately true. 
you didn’t know how long you stayed there. he didn’t know how long he stayed there. the two of you stayed in parallel behind a closed door, mimicking each other’s beating heart, for you knew that they would never be one. 
when you woke, you were still slumped against the door. you stood, stretching out your painfully aching muscles, arched your back, twisted your neck. your eyes were swollen raw with your epidemic of tears the night prior, and you rubbed the crust away. the memories flooded through you. lando was here. he was here, and you had to haul his ass out.
you thought he was going to kiss you. 
but he didn’t. your lips would remain untouched by his own. 
your fingers ghosted over your mouth, shivering at the memory of him so close to you. you could feel his breath fanning over your face– the heaving, desperate puffs of air– and he felt yours, too, with the same amount of anxiety. you were a wreck before him, and he was too. 
in no time you found your phone, grimacing at your battery, and the plethora of texts from rebecca and alexandra. it was still early in the morning so you had time to pull yourself together, but you had a big day with them today. qualifying was happening, and rebecca had set you up.
she set you up with raphael for the day. you knew she meant the best. and maybe it was. this was your opportunity to uphold your promise– to move on. you had to, or else you would be strung dry for the remainder of your life, with dreary hopes and aimless romantics. you would not drown in the ocean of lando norris, despite how cumbersome he gripped on your ankles. 
you fixed yourself for the day. showering quickly, styling your hair to your liking. you threw on a formal chic outfit, perhaps trying a bit hard today to catch raphael’s eye– or someone else’s, by chance. but you left the unattainable at the back of your mind today, heart far too raw to be ripped open again.
you would stick with something safe. someone safe. raphael was your answer in the short term. you were sick of playing the long game, bested to your knees in the face of whatever conspired between you and the british driver. you were convinced it was for the best. it had to be. these emotions couldn’t be for nothing. 
it couldn’t be for nothing. 
when you arrived to the track that morning, alexandra was quick to meet your side. she had an impenetrable amount of questions for you, yearning for your answers, but you only gave her a brief overview. 
“we’re done,” you said as you walked through the pit lane. “he doesn’t want me like that.” 
she was clearly taken back. her hand flew over her heart, obviously distressed for you. you admired her care for you. you would do the same for her. “really?” 
you nodded, gulping down the lump in your throat that was tempting to choke you. 
“it’s okay.” you reaffirmed her. she made a move to speak over you, console you to the highest degree, but you stopped her. “i’m fine. swear. let’s have a good day, shall we?” you plastered on a fake smile towards her, but you knew she saw through you. but she would accept this for now when you were approached by carlos, rebecca, and raphael. 
you smiled brighter when raphael came to kiss both your cheeks. you gripped his bicep. engaging in conversation with him felt easier today, and you weren’t begging for an out. you’d catch rebecca’s eye here and there, and she glowed with happiness. if you weren’t doing this for yourself, you could at least say that you were doing it for her. 
raphael was not a bad man whatsoever. he smelled good, had good hygiene, and had a glowing smile. but he didn’t smell the same. didn’t have the same musk. didn’t have the harsh pricks of a stubble that burned into the skin of your neck. 
fuck. you missed the feeling of that stubble. 
you clung to raphael’s side for the rest of the day, a burning itch between your thighs undoing the morals of your mind. if you wanted to get over lando, you’d have to truly get over him. 
it was never a ‘string’s attached’ relationship, was it? you were free to fuck whoever you want, when you want. so why would it be so bad if you wished to see raphael bend down for you? 
or you wanted someone else, but raphael was the closest you’d get. 
the rest of the day went by smoothly. for you, at least, but not for lando.
he had come into the mclaren paddock looking absolutely awry. his hair messy, eyes dreary with sleep and emotion, whereas you…you looked beautiful. untouched by your emotions from the night before. so much so that you were cuddled against that same fucking dude, which had lando’s blood bursting to life. 
you were across in the pitlane observing the car, arms folded over your chest. that fucking guy’s hand rested on the upper part of your back, rolling soft circles with the pads of his fingers. he clenched the rim of his helmet in his hands. his teeth grinded inside his mouth, sawing down the enamel. for you, he’d have no teeth. for you were the only world he wished to bite, and even then you starved him of it. 
“y’alright, mate?” oscar’s voice interrupted his thoughts. lando broke his stare from the pair of you, ripping his eyes away. 
but you had turned, then, and let your eyes linger on his back.
“fine.” 
that evening was no different than any other. for lando, at least, he succumbed to his hotel room for the night. he had no interest in going out. if he saw you with that spanish prick, he’d only lose himself even more. the guilt of losing you had been overturning, divulging into what a psychologist would declare as madness. 
but you were the opposite. you were out on the town, clubbing with rebecca and raphael. carlos was there, too, but was saving his energy for the race tomorrow. he held no drink in his hand, but you did. you were downing shot after shot. 
you were swaying your hips, grinding against raphael with a steady pace. he was into it. his dick was aggressively hard against the back side of your dress, but you weren’t scared by it. it enticed you further, in fact, and had you drawing new sensations of pleasure through you.
finally, you thought, a break from him. from lando. but the voices echoed inside the back of your mind. it bounced off the walls; he couldn’t compare. 
lando would have his hands drawing up the sides of your body. fingertips scathing the fabric of your dress, teasing touches that would have you writhing in his hold, desperate for him to fuck you in the back. 
lando would have his face nuzzled into your neck whispering bittersweet praises into your ear. he’d squeeze your hips with anticipation as the both of you would move in sync. always in sync. the two of you were one on the dance floor, one when you fucked one another senseless in your less than private moments. when he was particularly desperate for your touch, he’d go as far as taking you in the bathrooms at any club. he had no shame; not when it came to you. 
but raphael was tame. and maybe you appreciated tame. maybe this was a new start for you. fresh and free of any unknowns. 
“you’re beautiful, hermosa.” he would whisper to you, body trying its best to keep up with you. he did, for the most part, but you moved to your own beat. lando would know. he knew every inch of you. were you really prepared to be strangers? 
you spun around in raphael’s arms, wrapping yours around his neck. you offered him a cheeky smile. this wasn’t you. “and you’re handsome!” it was alcohol talking. you would never be seen so exuberant. not like this. 
it had raphael laughing, though, and it was enough for him to take you back to his place. 
the entire way back to his place you were giggling, latching onto his tanned skin. his hair was soft, sheen, and luscious. your hands never got lost in the strands of his hair– it was too combed, not curly enough. nothing was curly enough. 
and then he had you against the wall of his flat. your hands pinned against your head, and he met your lips with his. fuck, you couldn’t remember the last time you’ve been kissed. but the worst part about all of it was–
you hated it. 
you tugged his head down to your neck, letting him work the sensitive skin with his tongue. your lips felt hot. blistering with a heat you haven’t felt in a long time. it felt…it felt…
raphael’s tongue found the meeting part of your underwear and skin, “can i?” he asked with a timid voice. you let out a soft moan and nodded. he tugged the fabric down, your dress still hanging off your body. you didn’t even remember if he left kisses along your neck, your breasts, you guessed his lips weren’t that memorable. 
and then his tongue was against your slit. you weren’t wet enough. clearly. you could feel the chapped parts of your cunt, disappointed in your body that you couldn’t ‘get it up’ for him. whereas he was practically jacking off in his pants, you were left like a desert. it wouldn’t be like this with lando. 
he explored your cunt with his tongue, narrowly dodging your clit ever so slightly. he thought your noises of pleasure were noises of distress, so he avoided touching your clit as much as possible. so he tongued you through and through, until you began to become irritated. 
you couldn’t even feel tight in your stomach. the feeling couldn’t be outmatched. maybe your sexdrive had died. maybe you could never cum ever again. this was to be your fate– dry and lonely. fuck. you let your head fall back against the wall, which he took as a good sign, and kept going. instead, you threaded your hands through his hair, rolling your eyes. 
you let out a few soft, faked moans. you felt guilty– of course you did– but apparently it was an olympic sport to make you cum. he certainly wouldn’t make the playoffs. 
after another minute of this, you were fed up. 
you tightened your cunt on command, which took a lot of fucking work, thank you, and began to heighten the sound of your moans. the award for best fake orgasm goes to: you!!! you surged forward to grip onto his shoulders, even pretending to be shaking. 
you deserved an oscar. 
“didn’t think i was that good.” 
an egot, maybe. 
you let out a soft sigh, a faked chuckle, and let him lead you to his bedroom. he fell atop of you on your back, holding himself up with the strength of his forearms. he dipped his hand down, scathing over your irritated cunt. you gasped at his hand finding your slit once again, drenched in only his spit, and without warning slipped a finger inside of you. 
your mouth hung open, lurching at the sudden contact. you felt sinched beneath his weight, taught with tension. he even curled his finger inside of you. he grazed your bundle of nerves that had your squirming. squirming for more pressure. he kept hitting your spot until he pulled away. you looked confused at first, wondering where exactly he was going. 
and…then he was pulling his cock out. fuck. you really weren’t going to win here, tonight, were you? not in the slightest, it seemed. he looked down at you with a knowing smirk. the same one where he thought you came beneath his tongue. 
he thought you came. 
fuck!
“are you ready?” he asked when his cock pushed against the skin of your lower belly. he was a good size, you admit, but you had a inkling that you weren’t going to find a sweet release with his hands. you nodded, forgetting your manners, but raphael said nothing. 
he pushed into you with a discerning pace. you scrunched your nose out of his eyesight. he was too busy fucking himself into your pussy. he couldn’t even open his eyes to look at you. and, for the record, he didn’t use a condom. dick. at least you had a form of a contraceptive. you’d make sure not to let him finish inside you. that’s for fucking sure. 
he slid in and out of you with the lubrication of his spit and his own precum. you didn’t move. you laid there, bored, faking a moan and gasp here and there. 
the whole time you thought about someone else. and you didn’t feel guilty about it. you were able to find yourself comforted by the dreaming thought of lando’s voice in your ear. the phantom touch of his stubble. the amount of moles that you could count on his face. 
with a grunt, you felt raphael push off of you, cumming onto his own sheets. he laid there, panting, and you…”did the same.” 
he turned to face you, smile on his face. “did you finish?”
you nodded with an itching smile. he seemed triumphant. though you couldn’t be drier than a haystack. 
your exit from his flat quickly. it’s not like he even took your dress off. he insisted that you stayed, but you retorted that you had an early morning with alexandra. whether or not that's true, you didn’t seem to care. he didn’t fight your statement and seamlessly let you go, clearly too exhausted from his evening to even see you out the door.
you hailed a cab from your hotel shamefully. you felt icky. your lip sneered when you caught a cab and tipped the driver once you arrived back. the elevator ride never seemed so tantalizingly long. 
when you swiped into your room, you threw your belongings on your bed and turned on a hot shower. while you waited for the water to heat, you opened your phone. 
no messages from lando. 
did you expect any?
maybe. 
you decided to call him. you didn’t fucking care. it was the alcohol talking. 
ring…ring…ring…ring…ring…
no answer. 
you left a voicemail.
“heeyyy…!!” you surged into the phone as you began to untangle your dress from your body. “i–uh, i dunno i just…wanted to call you… because i…” you swore under your breath as you couldn’t get a strap off. “sorry i…” you stuttered, laughing to yourself. “i think i miss you, lan.” 
and then you hung up, singing yourself into the shower. the hot water panned over your body, fingers trailing over the mounds of your breasts. the soft skin of your abdomen. 
but with your whimsy, came a price.
lando was there. he just didn’t answer your call. he had been awake, wondering what you were doing, since you were absent on almost all forms of social media. so when he got your call, he couldn’t bring himself to accept it. 
then the voicemail came.
he must’ve played it over a dozen times. hearing your soft voice, amicable and kind. you had been drinking, clearly, and he could hear the sound of the shower running in the background. he held his phone against his head, other hand running through his hair. he was a wreck over you, and you were as well. drunk dialing was never a thing between the two of you. 
especially an ‘i miss you.’ 
and how ‘lan’ slipped past your lip with such ease. the name was meant for you to use. only you. 
he found himself stroking his cock to your words, the temptress in your voice. he knew she was there, baiting him, and he was no better than a fish to bite. he fisted his cock with your name on his lips, and a reminder that yours was on his.
with a pounding heartbeat and ringing in his ears, all he could think about was you. and more or less, you the same.
your fingers trailed down your navel in the shower, coming to nib at the lips of your clit. how swollen it was, angered and annoyed, that such a man could ignore it. by association, you. 
a hand rolled over one of your breasts, twisting your nipple in hand. you gasped at the sensation you provided, flicking your clit between your fingers. you truly needed no more to make yourself cum, except the thought of lando’s voice in your ears. 
‘come on, baby,’ he would say to you, fingers gliding along your drenched slit with ease. you clenched around nothing, whimpering to yourself in the hum of the hot shower. ‘little more for me, yeah?’ he would always talk you through it. never once would you be alone when you came. he was always there, lingering, a shadow against the walls. 
you slipped a single finger inside of yourself, curling it expertly as lando taught you to. ‘just like that, sweet thing.’ he’d mutter against your shoulder as he’d fuck you on a chair facing a mirror. you could never make yourself cum before his “lessons.” 
your back arched against the marble of the shower walls. your thumb and forefinger worked just like his would against your clit, massaging the bundle of nerves until a coil inside of you snapped, and you came all over yourself with his name on your lips.
and he could feel it. amongst the cosmic plane. he had been grudgingly fisting his cock, grunting your name over his lips. it was sinful, the way that his cock was spewing cum in only a matter of minutes at the thought of your voice. ‘lan, lan,’ you would say to him, ‘need it. need you inside,’ you’d whimper against him, begging for his cum to seep out of you. 
he’d never deny you a pleasure. so he shouldn’t deny himself. he came in a matter of seconds over the palm of his hand, your name flustering his tongue. and he’d lay there, soaking in his milky cum, eyes blown wide at just how much of an effect you had on him; mind, body, and soul. 
you stood there in the shower, flustered from heat, the slick running down your thighs. your hearts beat in unison at that moment, miles apart, on the same wavelength. 
the shower wasn’t the same after that. you felt dirty, but so good. the namesake of lando’s voice in your ear was enough to have you cumming on your own fingers, but the touch of another man made you ill. what a shock that was to you. or maybe it wasn’t a surprise at all. 
clean to the best of your ability, you slept easy that night. the best sleep you’ve had this weekend, in fact, with lando frolicking through your dreams. and you in his, whispering soft ‘i love you’s’ which had him writhing with pleasure. you infested every part of him, and he did the same to you. you’d never be free of lando norris, and the thought began to settle. it wasn’t the worst thing in the world, but you couldn’t forget his words. 
‘i don’t know,’ he spoke into your stomach. his nose pinched you. the words sliced clean. your stomach coiled not with pleasure, but anxiety. why didn’t he want you that way? why did he hesitate? 
you weren’t taking his rejection well. that was clear. 
but he wasn’t taking this any better. he was going through his own emotional turmoil of trying to make this up to you. it would be the last thing that he did. 
when you woke that morning with a groggy headache and a sore ache between your thighs, you couldn’t help but groan. what the fuck were you doing last night? you perhaps had the most disappointing sex of your entire life, and now, as you looked in the mirror you were nothing more than mortified. 
littered on your chest, above your breasts, were a few specks of bruises. hickey’s. fuck. fuck. that was one thing that was always far too intimate. kisses and hickeys. what did this mean, then, that you belonged to raphael? your fingers trailed up the bruises on your chest, the flesh tender beneath your soft touch. you winced at the memory of his cocky face, thinking that he had you finishing more than once. if at all. you leaned over the sink, washing your face off with cold water. 
your hands rested at the base of your neck. your reflection stared back at you, pitiful, the bruises beneath your eyes reflected a tiredness that the word ‘exhaustion’ could not begin to fathom. you were disappointed in yourself. that much was clear. 
a sigh escaped you when you finally mustered the courage to leave the bathroom. for the race today, you decided on a long dress. one that covered your chest, but hung on your shoulders. it was a beautiful piece. you’d been saving it for this weekend, and you were more than thankful that the universe seemed to be looking out for you. 
you tidied up your appearance the best you could and slid on a pair of heels, grimacing at the sore ache from the night before. raphael didn’t have a valet, so you had to walk across four blocks with his hands wandering down your sides, desperate to fuck you in an alleyway. ew. you shivered at the memory, but continued on from your hotel room.
though, you took one last glance before leaving, and let your eyes rest on the balcony. it felt like a dream to see lando sitting there, his face resting against the tender flesh of your stomach. his stubble itched through the cotton of your shirt, but it rather tickled. and then he said he didn’t know what he wanted with you, and your whole life slipped right through your fingers. 
he slipped through your fingers. 
you shut the door. 
lando’s morning, on the other hand, started off stellar in comparison to yours. he had stayed up a while longer, wondering if you would call him back, but you never did. there was a faint pang of disappointment, but much more guilt that he let you slip away so easily. he should’ve refused to leave your hotel room that night. refused by any force you attempted on him. 
but he’s just that much of a fucking idiot, wasn’t he? when he left for the paddock early that morning, he glanced at his phone one last time. one missed call, and it was from you last night. and then suddenly, his heart was warm, and there was a smile on his face.
all this told him was that there was a chance. you called him. you called him whether or not you were shitfaced. blackout drunk. in your vulnerable moments you thought of him. reached out for him. fuck, he was in love with you.
in love
he paused when he shut the door behind him, frozen in place. what? is that what this was? love? 
anxiety churned in his stomach. this feeling had been there for a while. a long time. and only now he was just realizing it. shit. 
he fiddled with his phone in his hands. thumb hovering over your contact card, he let it fall. 
it rang twice before he heard the line connect. 
“yeah?” you said, demure and quiet. he knew you were exhausted. he’s heard this tone before. the tone you had when you were viciously hungover. it had him chuckling. “what?” 
“good morning to you, too.” the words rolled easy from him. he suddenly felt calmer with you on the other end, but it didn’t stop the butterflies from fluttering in the pit of his stomach. 
“good morning.” you said, like you were shocked that he was calling you to say good morning. 
“fun night?” he asked, stepping into the elevator and hitting the ‘lobby’ button. a few members of his team were already waiting for him. 
 but you had froze up in the car ride to the paddock. what? how could he know? did he know that you were with raphael? you cleared your throat. “what– what do you mean?” 
“you called me.” 
shit. 
if you weren’t fucked already, you were royally now. your hand dragged over your forehead as your head swarmed with anxious thoughts, completely forgetting about calling him and then…touching yourself in the shower to the thought of him. yikes! what a little freak you were. but lando would enjoy it. 
“i–” you stuttered, voice caught in your throat. “i’m sorry…i was just…” 
your voice trailed and you could hear his childish laugh from the other end. “no, no. it was cute.” you heard the elevator ding from his end, but it hard to focus on when there was a deep blush flustering your cheeks. 
“i didn’t mean to bother you,” you quickly said, finding the need to apologize over and over again for disrupting his night. it was embarrassing enough as is that you had the worst sex of your life, but you called the one man that didn’t want you for consolidation. what a conundrum that was, wasn’t it? 
“you didn’t.” his words were firm this time, no traces of playfulness. you perked up at this, finding yourself laughing. 
“must’ve said something dumb, didn’t i?” 
there was a pause. 
“yeah. yeah. something dumb.” 
there was another beat of silence. you shifted in the uber, the pass around your neck.
“i’ll see you there?” 
you heard him suck in a tight breath, then release it. 
“yeah. yeah, ‘course you will.” 
you smiled. he could feel it. 
“okay. bye, then.” 
he said your name softly on the other end with a salutation, and the line went flat. you slammed your back against the leather seats of the car, hands rolling over your face. you rubbed your eyes, wondering if you were still dreaming. 
it wasn’t fair that he could make you this way. that he had you in tears just a few nights before, and now your fingers shook with excitement. fuck him. fuck him for making you feel this way, and yet, there was no trace of annoyance on your face. 
just a bright smile. 
your name was called when you swiped into the paddock. it had you whipping your head up to see who it could be, but you already knew that it was alexandra. she wasn’t trailed by anyone else, thank god, and she flung her arms around you for a hug. 
you sang a soft greeting towards her, and she looked up at you expectantly. you raised a brow. 
“so…!?” 
you narrowed your eyes. 
“your night with…!” her voice dropped to a whisper. “raphael.” 
you shushed her, looking around, before you held one of her hands in yours. “you want the truth?” her facial expression dropped, but she nodded anyways. 
“awful.” 
she groaned, head rolling back in disappointment. “i told rebecca it wasn’t a good idea.” 
“the sex was…horrible. just…i mean, what the fuck?” alexandra burst out into a laugh as the both of you joined side by side towards the ferrari hospitality. you dreaded going, given the unanswered texts for him, you didn’t want to be confronted with…anything. 
“most importantly…” alexandra stopped the two of you before you entered. “are you over him?” 
him. the inevitable. 
you swallowed. 
and nodded your head.
alexandra was only slightly pleased and gave you a reassuring smile. boy, this would be a long day. 
before the race started you were wandering around the pitlane with your miniature crew of ferrari girlfriends and their friends. raphael had found you, eagerly, with a prideful smile on his face. out of kindness, you returned the gesture, and let him linger around you for the day.
ferrari’s pit was next to mclaren’s. you couldn’t help but stare. 
lando was there. in his papaya race suit. he was speaking to his engineers, and never glanced your way. look at me, you wanted to shout. please, your mind begged. but you stayed firm at raphael’s side.
he dared to stretch out his hand to let it loiter on your waist, but you shimmied out of the contact with an awkward smile. he noticed, but didn’t say anything. 
lando did too. 
but not what you wanted him to see. he saw you with raphael’s arm around your waist. you were smiling, laughing, in their presence. whereas he couldn’t even bear a night out without the cumbersome thoughts of you constricting his mind. he thought of nothing but you. and here you were, haphazardly dangling this spanish prick in front of his face. fucker. 
you turned to look at lando again, free of raphael’s touch. he was staring.
your heart beat faster, eyes widened. your palms were sweating– why were they sweating? he looked pissed, frustrated, but you didn’t know why. your brows upturned with a soft expression that he yearned for, and his envy flushed away. 
it was that easy. your gentle features. the concern ridden in your face. 
you even gave him a small wave, twiddling your fingers. he was bashful in response, and returned it with a small twist of his own fingers. 
but his eyes carried down. towards your chest. you blinked, realizing that part of your dress had slipped further. there was an obvious bruise making an appearance, and you felt guilty. guilty as if you had cheated on him, but you were never in a relationship to begin with.
you saw his jaw tightened and his hands flex before he turned, leaving you speechless. 
and then you were dragged away, just like that, into the viewing panel for the race. they were about to start their formation lap, yet you could barely focus with your racing heart. 
it past with ease. raphael tried to get closer to you, but you found excuses to stay huddled at alexandra’s side. she noticed, and even wrapped her own arm around your waist. the two of you were a picturesque vision of divine femininity. you felt untouchable at her side, incomparable to any girlfriend you’ve ever had. 
lando was fighting hard. he was aggressive on the straits, pushing past the limits of his drs. your hand traced over your chin as you watched the tv intensely, frightened when you saw him make contact with one of the mercedes drivers. 
“what is he doing…” you muttered under your breath. your nailbeds were being hacked on by your teeth, chewing them down to the stump. parts of your thumbs streamed with blood. 
little to your knowledge, your reaction had been broadcasted. alexandra’s face unfurled with a cheeky look, realizing that she had been played by your deception from earlier. you were not over him. in fact, you were entirely worse than before. your concern was ebbed through the power of media, and that wouldn’t be forgotten. 
“are you okay?” came raphael’s voice. you didn’t even look at him.
“fine.” 
he took your cold tone in earnest, realizing that there was something more at stake here. 
you couldn’t be more grateful when lando passed the checkered flag. your hand found the column of your throat, finding comfort. you let your face be consumed by a smile, one similar to raphael’s when he thought he made you came. stupid man, you thought, glancing towards the spaniard. you had a new priority now.
you had to prove that you wanted lando. but how? everything felt like it was becoming too complicated. your fates were intertwined via an invisible string. 
and you didn’t even go to his podium.
he looked for you, sweat dripping down his forehead, but didn’t see you. it had him grow weary, agitated. he raced this hard so he could prove himself to you. prove that he was better than some lowlife. 
but he fears he lost you. 
the hickey’s on your neck spoke volumes. you fucked him. fucked that stranger. his fists curled around the trophy, break-necking the medal display. 
did you come? 
no. stop that. it’s none of his business to ask–
she didn’t. you couldn’t. 
the pieces began to fall in place in his head. the phone call. you called him…when you needed him most. 
it suddenly made holding this trophy all the more worthwhile, and he even donned a smile on his face when he raised it high above his head. this, he thought, was victory. 
the night came as swiftly as the day went. you were getting ready to go out, alexandra reminding you to schedule your uber. you did. the dress you wore this evening was short. one of your favorite colors, and had a high neckline. for obvious reasons. you were entirely mortified that raphael felt the primal need to mark you like some bitch. it had your stomach twisting with anger, fingers pulsing with a punch. 
but your violent urges stayed dormant when you met up with alexandra, charles, rebecca, carlos, and…raphael. jeez, what a lot you’ve surrounded yourself with. raphael was at your side in an instant when you climbed out of the uber, refusing to give you a morsel of space. it had your lip curling, grimacing down the vomit that curdled in your throat. 
you barely spoke a word to him tonight. there was nothing more to say to him. if you were to say anything, it would be a rotten lie. 
alexandra tugged you along through the doors, charles at her flank, which you gladly let her do. anything to get away from raphael would be best for you, given how much you didn’t want to confront him. it was just for the weekend, right? no strings attached. 
no strings attached, echoed through your mind. flashes of lando’s hands on your hips, the phantom embrace that tensed around your flesh, seeped into your head. your heart plummeted against your will, looking around futilely for his bright smile amongst the sea of oncomers. 
it didn’t take you long.
but you wish that it did. 
he had his arm slung around some girl, hat backwards, first few buttons undone on his white dress shirt. hands clamming up, you tightened them together over your front, letting your eyes gawk at such a beautiful pairing. it was a different girl than the one you had rudely met in monaco. 
another one of his girls. 
your mind begged you to let it go. but your heart chained itself to lando, refusing to let go this…infatuation that had you sick to your stomach. what did she have that you didn’t? was she nonchalant? was she a cool girl? 
your staring lasted too long. lando saw you. he felt your eyes– your heated stare, beckoning his attention. he answered your call, glancing directly at you. but he did not wave. 
neither did you. 
the urge thwarted you to look anywhere else but him, tugged your attention elsewhere, but you stayed firm on his freckled face, sharp cheekbones, his daunting stare. you felt the beat of his heart from across the room, the bass boosted rap, his irritability when raphael came to rest a hand on your hip. but you did not turn away from this fight. your arsenal was loaded, and so was his. 
lando glanced at raphael, first to break eye contact, and swug the rest of his cocktail in hand. he let the glass slide across the counter of the bar before tugging the girl at his side to his front, the pair of them dancing with one another. 
fine, if he wants to play, then you’ll play. 
you were handed a cocktail by raphael. you thanked him sincerely before you downed your own in one gulp. raphael gaped at you with a slack jaw. you wiped the loose drops from your jaw, and offered him your hand. 
“dance with me?” 
raphael didn’t need to be asked twice when he took your hand. you led him deeper into the club, the led lights brightening both your faces. in this light, you supposed that he was irrecoverably handsome. and the thought slipped through your mind that maybe, just maybe, you could’ve had a good life with him. that in some universe that you could get over this feud with a man who doesn’t want you, you’d have a well-earned chance at happiness. 
but the thought left just as quickly as it came. 
your hips were against his. ass against his crotch, grinding in a rough series of movements. he began growing accustomed to how you moved, and that much you could be thankful for. no longer would the two of you be awkward on the dance floor, fragile hands trembling against your body. he felt more confident, but you could tell there was something brewing behind those big brown eyes of his. but you honestly couldn’t care less, not when you were distracted. 
not when your eyes were entranced on a man who treated you like garbage. who cried in your arms, begged for your presence. then, left your hotel room with tears streaming down your face. 
his hands were tightly wound around the girls abdomen, cocky expression glazing his face. he spoke to a few of his buddies here, too, amply looking like a douche. one that who knew exactly what he was doing to girls. fuck. 
you were just one of his girls. 
this enraged you. but it shouldn’t. but it did. there was no excuse for your fray of emotions. they simply existed, and you were going to deal with them. not in a responsible way. no, you were far too gone for that. alcohol warmed your throat, your palms, your chest. 
you let your head lean back onto raphael’s shoulder, your mouth coming to his ear. “you can touch me.” you encouraged him. he seemed to lighten at this, becoming bold enough to let his hands trail up your body. he’d indulge in your shape, letting his fingers imprint against the globes of your breasts, the lining of your panties beneath your dress. 
a light giggle left you when you let your head rise from his blades, and were met with an aggressive, terrifying, stare from across the room. 
your lips puckered. 
lando’s head was resting on the girl’s shoulder, his hips swaying with hers, but his eyes were trained on you. you, you, and more you. he was glaring at the man behind you, his gaze so bitter that it soured even your own tongue. it was the miniscule amount of guilt that flustered your head, but you shoved it down. 
lando retaliated, beginning to kiss on the girls neck. she leaned against him, a gorgeous smile lighting up the room. 
you grumbled, turning your head to meet raphael’s eyes. your eyes pleaded with a language of seduction, one that any man could understand. 
raphael took the bait. 
his lips trailed down your ear, down the column of your neck. all whilst your back was pressed against his front, you felt the outline of his dick. your palm tightened at the memory of how he attempted to fuck you, but you had to remain composed. you couldn’t fail now. 
your lip caught between your teeth for dramatics. like you were holding back a moan. 
lando was watching. in fact, he never stopped. he was drunk on the addiction of watching you. watching you grind your hips on that fuckin’ guy, not even wince when his lips were glossing over the sensitive flesh of your neck. could he make you wet with just his mouth? 
the british driver could feel his end nearing. if this progressed any further, he’d drag your ass to the bathroom and fuck you like you’d deserve. he didn’t give a fuck. not anymore. not when your lip was bitten by your top row of teeth, an illusive point to how that guy was pleasuring you. he felt fucking sick. though he was starving to the same degree. 
his chest was aflame at your teasing touches on your own body. he could see the outline of your panties, the lack of a bra. your nipples were pinching against the fabric that confined them, and he had to stop himself from drooling. you were so fucking sexy. 
the girl at his front was growing bored of her lack of attention. he, honestly, didn’t even remember her name. but he’d suffice it with a swirl of his tongue around the skin of her jaw. it was a critical move, since he knew that you’d never let yourself be kissed. you wouldn’t risk such intimacy with a man you’ve only known for a few days–
except you would. 
this was war, wasn’t it? 
watching lando suck and slurp on that girl’s neck had you desperate to come up with an alternate idea. an approach that would crown you victorious without a second thought. it was cruel, you knew this, but you were out of options. you had something to prove. prove that you were over him. though, you knew that this would end in one of two ways;
him, fucking you.
or, him leaving. 
you much preferred the latter. 
with enough fury boiling in your bones, you lifted your head to meet raphael’s eyes. with your pointer finger, you let it roll over his chin, connecting with your thumb. you glanced at his lips, your tongue wetting your own, and pulled him to meet you. 
raphael said your name into your mouth, nervous to even let his tongue explore yours. you sucked in a tight breath, lip curling to reference a snarl at how much you despised the sensation. it was messy, wet, and you felt instantly disgusted with yourself for even letting him touch your lips. you felt like you jumped too far into a relationship with raphael, even though you were certain that you didn’t want one. 
“be my girlfriend,” raphael breathed into your mouth. you hummed a laugh, thinking that he was joking. but he moved to separate you too, staring at you with a brazen thoroughness that you never wished to see again. 
“i’m serious. i want–” 
“‘scuse me, mate,” you knew that voice. you knew that voice too well. your head spun around to see lando leering dangerously close to raphael’s face, the heat of his body emanating onto your own. he stood only a few inches from you.
you felt his hand ghost over the small of your back, and you suddenly felt desperate to feel it. with your lips raw from that kiss, your fingertip glazed over the flesh, your eyes lost in lando’s tense expression. his jaw was tightened, chest doing it’s best to keep his heated expression under control. however, that control was slipping with every passing moment that you were in raphael’s arms. 
raphael turned his attention to lando, suddenly pissed. “need something?” 
lando gave him a hoarse chuckle. “yeah. can i borrow your lady for a second?”
raphael made a move to shake his head. “no, we were just—”
“thanks, mate.” lando gripped your back with his fingertips, digging into the skin without mercy. you felt his anger rolling off of him in tense waves, the urge to consolidate him overwhelming. he led you through the crowds of people with an insurmountable force, jaw tightly clenched the entire way. you could practically hear his teeth grinding against one another. 
he said nothing until he opened– no, broke the door– to the bathroom. it was a single stall– no one was in there. he allowed you to enter first, stretching out his arm as a much needed signal. you waited a moment, arms crossing over your chest. 
his eyes didn’t relent. he would wait here all fucking day before you decided to go in. and you did. he locked the door behind the two of you in an instant. 
“what the fuck are you–” you began to scold, back turned to him as you approached the mirror and the sink. you were interrupted when he spun you around, hand place firmly on your hip. the contact had you gasping, glancing down at his hand. 
“so, what?” he said, looking down at you through hooded eyes, blown pupils. his heart was electrified, hidden behind his cage of ribs, and one hand flexed as it gripped the edges of the porcelain sink. he hummed, “hm? he your boyfriend now?”you gaped at him. “you’re serious?” you stifled a laugh, unbelieving of his attitude. “what’s it to you, lando? hm?”
his shoulders tensed. “you shouldn’t be with him.” 
you rolled your eyes. lando gripped your chin, demanding your attention. “why not, then? ‘m i supposed to be your whore forever?” 
his thumb rolled over your bottom lip. “you never were,” he tsked. you were bewildered. brow raising, however difficult to focus when his hand around your hip began to swirl circles on your skin. 
“what the fuck are you saying, then, lando? you need to–”
“you let him kiss you.” 
you froze. 
“never me. why?” his restraint was slipping. his forehead edged closer and closer to yours until you could feel his breath fanning across your face. 
“why?” he asked again, his nose brushing against your own. you shook your head ‘no,’ lip beginning to quiver beneath his body. his chest pressed against your own as he got closer. he needed to be closer. “he fuck you better? hm? that it?” 
you shuddered when you felt his fingers lower from your hip, trailing circles towards your navel, the slit of your dress that met your upper thigh. 
“go on,” he urged, his voice tense from gritting his teeth. “tell me. tell me, and i’ll stop.” 
you stayed quiet except for the whimper that left your throat when his fingers curled against your panties, a dampened spot ruining the fabric. there was a deep chuckle against your face, lando’s forehead still against your own. you tightened your lips together, not daring a word to spill. 
“tell me, and i’ll let you go party with your new boy.” 
“fuck you,” you bit out, seething with your desire, angered with his jealous antics. 
“yeah? yeah? you want ‘ta fuck me?” there was no way of hiding his cocky grin. it could be seen from miles away, even when his face was millimeters from yours. 
“you’re an asshole,” you heaved, your hips bucking when he began to slide your underwear to the side. your breaths were harsh against his cheeks. 
“must like ‘em mean, then,” he cooed, followed by a deep chuckle. “‘cause you’re drippin’ for me.” you felt your slick seep around his fingers as h grazed the puffy lips of your cunt. your head was thrown back against the concrete wall, smacking against the surface. lando was quick to adjust your head, his fingers tugging into your hair. 
“fuck,” you sighed, finding his pleasures undeniable. he was so on edge from seeing you kissing raphael, that he was lost in his madness. this pent up lust was bursting from its locked away jar, pouring its fury onto you. “touch me, lando. please–” 
with a swift motion he perched you onto the porcelain sink, your head lolling against the mirror, supported by his palm. he tugged you forward so your glossy cunt stained the front of his black pants. the wet spot was pertinent, your face flushing with embarrassment. you were supposed to hate this. why did you love it? 
“‘am touchin’ you, baby.” his middle finger teased you, blessing you with a split moment of euphoria of grazing your clit. you moaned, eyes fluttering shut. “look at me,” his hand tightened in your hair. your eyes flashed open, face to face with his crooked, loving smile. “look at me when i make you cum.”
you nodded, whimpering rapidly. he grinned harder at your desperate, pleading tone. though you spoke no words, he could tell just how badly you needed him. 
“inside,” your begging didn’t cease, especially when he was still refusing to slide a finger inside of you. “please, please—”
your words were cut off when his middle finger curled sweetly inside of you, eliciting the sweetest pleasure you have felt in weeks. the moan you delivered was guttural, deep, and most of all, primal. lando’s dick pulsated in his pants, his fingers twitching at your lewd voice. 
a hand reached out to grip onto his bicep, your head falling into the crook of his neck. you felt undeniably at ease in his hold, despite the hurt that he’s caused you. 
his finger began to slide in and out of you, scissoring you to high hell and back, and you were putty in his hands. moments like these is what he favored most with you, but he would take anything to be in your presence. he didn’t feel an ounce of guilt when he swooped you up from that asshole’s arms, leaving him shocked and disrespected. lando was keen enough to twist his head over his shoulder when he led you away, watching as raphael’s face contorted with disappointment. it had his jaw tensing, resisting the urge to smirk. 
“come on, baby,” lando’s voice cut through your high, your naval tightening with a hot pressure. “know you’re close. can feel it.” 
he added a second finger, using his thumb to roll over your sensitive bundle of nerves. the stimulation was overwhelming, your throat raw with the carnal moans he drew from your depths. he’d be the only one to hear any of these ever again. he promised himself that much. 
your orgasm was imminent, the coil in your belly snapping with a hopeless yearning you’ve been deprived of for what feels like an eternity. slick covered the palm of his hand, and your eyes had locked onto his. he watched as you trembled with desire, legs twitched around his waist. with one quick move he brought his two fingers to your lips.
you knew what he wanted. 
you’ve never tasted yourself before. but your lips parted, and he lathered your slick over your tongue. you sucked in earnest over his calloused digits, lips puckering, cheeks hollowing. you swallowed, letting your tongue linger over his fingertips.
“now you know,” he whispered, clutching you tight. “why i can’t stay away.” for a brief moment, you thought he was mentioning because of the taste of your cunt. but with the deep look in his eyes, you knew it meant more. you were made for him. both in spirit and sensuality. 
lando spun you around from your seat atop the sink, having you flipped, staring at your reflection in the mirror. you look disheveled, and downright fucked. your feet met the ground, the palm of his hand spreading over the expanse of your back, flattening you to a ninety degree angle. 
“lift your hips for me, love,” you obeyed without second thoughts, rising to your tip toes as he ran his fingers along the underside of your thighs, pulling down the fabric of your panties. they hit the floor, and your cunt went rigid with the cold air. but you heard lando making fast work with his belt, his jeans, and you sifted back and forth. you even turned to look at him over your shoulder, lashes batting unintentionally at the spring of his cock against his lower belly. 
“missed this,” he breathed, saddling his hand at the base of your neck. you pushed into his hold, deepening the connection. 
your exhaustion didn’t impede your ability to get fucked. that was for sure. lando wasn’t going to spare a single effort on your behalf. he was riled, pent up, and now he wanted to see tears in your eyes as you were split open on his cock. it was a promise. 
“missed you.” you mumbled. lando’s hand tightened around the frontal base of your throat. 
“what was that?” 
you whimpered. “missed you!”
“atta girl.” he was pleased with your higher volume, and awarded you by edging the tip of his cock through your folds. you lurched forward, gripping onto the dish of the sink. a deep groan left you, and he gave you a grace period to adjust. but it took too long. you wanted him deep. bottomed out. until there was nothing else for you to give. 
“show me,” you grit your teeth. “show me he’s not good enough.” 
your words seemed to ignite a flame inside of lando that couldn’t be ignored. you felt him huff air, the sensation tickling your spine, and he thrust himself inside of you. forget a grace period, you were going straight to heaven. 
you moaned, his cock stimulating a perverse area inside your cunt that no man could ever reach. lando was out for blood to prove that he was the only man that could truly fuck you. and fuck you he would. 
the sound of skin slapping echoed through the bathroom. your moans intertwined with his mewls, creating an atmosphere derived from both of your pleasures alone. nothing would ever compare to this feeling. how he curved deliciously inside of you, how you tightened so mercilessly around his cock. he’d let himself run dry so he could feel your tight walls each night. 
the pressure of his hand around your throat didn’t relent. with his index and thumb squeezing at every point he bottomed out, you swore you were seeing stars. you were an irrecoverable mess in lando’s arms, and that’s just the way he wanted you. in the reflection of the mirror stared the fading marks that fucker left on your skin. but he was determined to make his own. and it was different that you’d let him. without a doubt, he could bite through your skin, make you bleed for all you fucking cared. 
“who’s fucking you this good?” lando asked, hand tightening briefly for your response. you were lost in your haze, unable to truly focus on his words. your brows furrowed. 
“you,” you said, breathless, clenching onto the sink with all your prospective might. 
“who?” he prodded further, opposite hand coming to rub at your clit. you seethed, breath tightening in your throat. tears burned at your retinas, the skillful work of his fingers bringing you to an oncoming orgasm. lando felt it, and paused his fingers. 
you whimpered, then looked at him in the mirror. he loomed like no man you’ve ever seen. darkened eyes, sweaty hair. fuck, he’s so hot. “you!” 
his fingers returned their assault on your clit, and you could feel the burning heat once more. you grinded hopelessly against the palm of his hand, which he responded as to pinching the bundle of nerves atop your cunt to with more pressure. 
it didn’t take long before you were keeling over the sink, his hand around your neck forcing you to arch before him. with your unbearably tight cunt, he came with you, filling you with hot ropes of cum. the feeling of him warm, vested in your walls brought you a comfort like nothing else. 
lando’s head fell forward with his heaving chest onto the base of your neck. his heart was beating so fast, you could feel it. you lifted yourself from the downward angle of the sink, his hands coming to steady you despite his exhaustion. 
“i lied to you before,” he spoke into the skin of your neck. too fucked out to really process what he was saying, you turned slightly to catch one of his eyes. “you aren’t a favorite.”
you frowned, still confused, heart feeling ripped open once more. 
“you’re the only girl.” 
you turned fully this time to face him. 
“what?”
“you heard me.” you did. that was true. but what you didn’t believe was true, was his words. 
“don’t…” you begged. “don’t play with me anymore, lan…” the nickname rolled off your tongue with ease. “i can’t…i can’t wait for someone who doesn’t…” love, “want me the same.”
lando brushed a stray hair from your forehead. he let himself lean into you. your bodies fit together perfectly. 
“what do you want, then?” 
your voice was caught in your throat. there was a million things you wanted, but there was only one thing you needed. 
“i need you.” 
need cut through his body like wild flower to barley. need was the mending his heart needed. need was the remedy of his uncertainties about you. 
his face upturned into a smile. 
“i can’t do this,” he said, taking a breath. “any of this, without you. need you here, with me,” with his forehead touching yours, you could feel his lashes against your browline. 
“lando…”
he shook his head. your name was soft on his tongue. “please, please, stay with me. i should’ve never left that hotel room. never.” 
your cheeks were wet. but they weren’t from your tears. his. his lip was quivering when you opened your eyes, his own shut as if he were too afraid to face you. 
and instead of answering him with words, you tilted your head up, and let your lips collide with his. torn into shock, lando’s eyes flew open, unbelieving of what was happening. you were kissing him. your lips on his, intimate. you wanted to be intimate with him, not just fuck him. 
his eyes fluttered shut, and his hand came to wrap around the back of your neck. he returned your kiss, tongue eager to explore the cavern of your mouth, and you let him. you had been afraid to let him kiss you, fearful that you would become addicted to this pleasure. 
you were right in your fear. there was never a universe where you wouldn’t be drunk on his tongue, craving his teeth clashing with your own. it was an ensued battle with your mouths, one you weren’t going to relent easily. but he remained victorious and let his tongue run over yours. the two of you were inseparable, body and spirit. 
there was finally a blasted knock on the bathroom door, which had you jumping. lando turned his head over his shoulder, and was quick to drop to his knees to roll your panties back up. 
“like you down there,” you commented from him on his knees. he turned to look at you with a knowing smirk, and kissed the skin of your thighs. when he stood at his full height, he adjusted his own pants, looking presentable enough. 
“beautiful.” he complimented, leaning in for a plethora of kisses. he kissed all around your mouth, your nose, your jaw, before he landed on your mouth.
“i love you,” he blurted out against your lips. you gaped at him and he was worried you wouldn’t feel the same. but the two of you knew this answer for a long, long time. 
your brows upturned. “i love you too.” 
his hand fell on your lower back, guiding you out of the bathroom. “guess you’re my girl now, yeah?” 
you slapped his bicep. “we have a lot to talk about, but for tonight…” you nodded. 
he was happy enough with that answer. 
“gotta let raphael down easy…” you mumbled as lando held the door open for you. 
“oh…!” he said in an exaggerated tone. “that’s what his name is.” 
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enha-cafe · 11 months ago
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I <3 NERDS (c.s)
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PAIRING: nerd! soobin x afab! reader SUMMARY: just y/n not expecting nerd! soobin to be a sex god inspired by this very long thought with @gyuthmics WARNINGS: smut, basically no plot, afab! reader, switch! reader, dom! soobin, big dick! soobin, oral (m rec.), fingering, unprotected sex, creampie (please it's soobin i can't not include it), usage of the words "slut", "baby", "good girl", snowballing, literally like one spank WORD COUNT: 1.7k
you thought playing around with the cute little nerd in your class would be funny. he was absolutely harmless, you thought, blushing whenever you made eye contact with him and always watching anime in the back of class. all you wanted was to make him your partner for the project and watch him get flustered at every moment. so now you're left wondering: is this really happening? are you really getting the best dick of your life from some guy who has openly said his favorite anime is bunny girl senpai? how did he manage to have you crying and screaming his name?
you remember how his cheeks and ears reddened when you invited him over to your place to "work on the project," when you just wanted to see how long it'd take before he'd beg for your pussy.
oh, how you've missed having someone to play with. you wore a low-cut tank and shorts, leaving little to the imagination. gently patting the spot on your bed, inviting him to sit beside you. relishing the way he stutters each time he looks to talk to you. constantly looking up at him with doe eyes, brushing your shoulder against his, and pushing your breasts into his arms. how badly you're just waiting for him to snap. look at you through those overgrown bangs and grovel for you to give him a sweet release.
he did break, just not in the way you were hoping.
it was a swift motion, with soobin taking you by the wrists and pinning you down. "well, someone is acting like a little slut today." never would you have thought this absolute nerd would have you at such a loss for words. those words make you have to take a pause and leave your mouth slightly agape. "what's wrong? cat got your tongue?" he says this, cocking his head to the side and chuckling.
you're completely lost as to who the man in front of you is; this isn't the nerd you were toying with all day. this is some sort of demon you decided to summon. "c'mon, baby, use your words. i know you want this; you've been messing with me all day. don't back out now." he says, staring into your eyes, and all you can do is let out a broken please. "that's what i like to hear," he says right before planting a kiss on your lips.
you're needy for him, and soobin can't help but chuckle. the way you try to grind down on his knee between your legs, he thinks it's cute how you're slowly becoming putty in his hands. he wants to—no, he needs to ruin you. he's having to hold himself back, and you can tell. for now, he's content with just the taste of you. moving his lips from yours to your neck, you can't help but let out a moan and squirm more. "you're absolutely insatiable; tell me what you want." you're not sure how, but he's already managed to make your head dizzy. "i need you—i need you inside me, please, soobin." you can feel him smile into your neck as you plead. "of course, baby, but i need something from you first." he says letting your wrists free and using his other hand to unbutton his jeans. "get on your knees and suck my cock like the slut you are."
you feel like a woman possessed by how quickly you get on your knees for him. staring up at him in anticipation and hoping he won't notice as you rub your thighs together. when he pulls his pants down, it almost hits you in the face, and you can't help but stare. he's huge. "soobin, you're going to break me." he nearly throws his head back and laughs, "i thought sluts like you were supposed to like big cocks. c'mon, don't be shy now. suck." his order sends a jolt of electricity down to your core.
opening your mouth, you try to take as much of him as possible, and what you can't, you wrap your hands around. bobbing your head up and down his cock, your eyes never leave him. the way his breathing becomes gradually more labored as he groans. his eyes are hungry as he looks at you. "good girl, i knew you could take me," he tells you, and you can feel your walls clench around nothing, and you can't help but moan around him. it's enough to make him curse and grab the back of your head. you can feel tears pricking at the corners of your eyes as he pushes your head down. feeling his head hit the back of your throat and his cock twitch. you barely have a second before you feel hot cum spill down your throat.
soobin pulls you off his cock and places a hand under your chin. forcing you to stare up at him through those thick-rimmed glasses and overgrown fringe. he pulls you up to him and forces his lips on yours. swapping his cum between you before you finally decide to swallow it. "you're nasty," he says before giving you a light spank, making you let out a yelp. he grabs you by the hand and guides you back to the bed.
his eyes are blown with lust, and suddenly your clothes feel too hot for your skin. you're telling him to pull off your shorts as you tear your top off, and you're left in only your underwear. soobin is quick to start marking and playing with your breasts, telling you how perfect they are. feeling his right hand on your clothed core, you can't help but grind against it. he notices the way you grind on his hand and moves your panties to the side. watching how drenched you are, he decides to dip two of his long fingers inside you, and it has you reeling. 
feeling his fingers inside your gummy walls is enough to have you screaming for him. he reaches places your pathetic fingers could never reach. he's so mean and fast with them too; the noises made by them are so lewd, you'd be embarrassed if you weren't enjoying it so much. you think you can't get enough of his fingers until he uses his thumb to circle your clit. the stimulation is so great that he has you chanting his name. his name is dripping like honey from your lips as you try your hardest not to cum. soobin knows you're close; how couldn't he? with your walls fluttering against his fingers and your thighs trembling. "it's okay, baby, you can let go for me," and it's almost as though that was the final piece of a puzzle. you're suddenly seeing stars, and your walls are convulsing around him as you cum.
"is that all you can take, or do you want more?" he asks you as if he doesn't already know your answer. without a second thought, you're screaming once more for him, "please, soobin, i need you inside of me—going insane—need your big cock inside me." you're so needy and desperate for him, it's borderline pathetic. "okay, let me just grab a condom," he says, going to get up, but you grab his arm, pulling him back in to stop him. "no, i need you raw." such a simple sentence, but it's enough to make his cock twitch. "you really are insatiable," and his lips dive back into yours.
as you kiss, you can feel him lining himself up with you, his large cockhead teasing your opening. moaning into the kiss and telling him to put it in already, only making him smile against your lips. when he slips into you, you swear you see heaven. the stretch like nothing you've ever felt before; he's so big, and he's already hitting you so deep. when he bottoms out, you're already grinding against him, begging him to move. soobin is more than happy to oblige, digging his fingers into your hips and slowly pulling out of you, only to ram back in.
you think he'd be rough with just that one thrust, but he continues to be hard and fast. as he thrusts his cock inside of you, you can't help but stare. he makes your head fuzzy, and all you can do is lay there and moan. feeling him lay his hand over your stomach and press down has you clenching around him, making him twitch deep inside you. "god, you're so tight, and you take me so well, like you were made for me," he says. all you can do is moan at his praises, making you teeter closer to the edge.
his groans sound like heaven, his glasses are foggy, and his fringe slightly hangs over them. you don't think you've ever seen anyone look hotter. you don't realize how long you've been staring until he says something like, "see something you like?" and in that moment, you realize you're drunk on him, and you don't ever want to get sober. he chuckles and gives you a smirk right before playing with your clit again. "i can feel the way you're clenching down on me; I know you're close." he's acting almost as if he isn't close, too. "please, soobin, i need to cum—need you to fill me up too, please, soobin." you punctuate your words by wrapping your legs around his waist.
his thrusts become sloppier, and his head falls into the crook of your neck. feeling his hot breath as he curses. "cum for me, y/n" it's not a request but an order. your legs tighten around him as you cum, locking him in as you let out loud moans while your body is wracked with pleasure. you barely get a second to recover before soobin's hot cum floods your insides. there's so much, and you don't think you've ever felt fuller than you do in this moment. after he slips out, you can feel his cum starting to dribble out of your hole.
your head is fuzzy, and you're barely coherent when soobin tells you he's going to grab something to clean you up. however, even with the burn in your legs, gasping for air, and cum spilling from your hole. you can't help but think there's no way this absolute sex god of a man is a damn nerd.
but god, you love nerds.
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perma tag list: @hoonslutt @moonlighthoon @love4heejayke @jouliejihan @majestyjun @yizhoutv
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