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[in-death-we-fall]

Out Of The Shadows

Since his shock exit from Slipknot, Joey Jordison has remained silent. For the first time, he opens up about the split, the debilitating condition that left him unable to walk, and how he's been reborn anew

Words: Dom Lawson • Pics: Travis Shinn

Metal Hammer 285 - August 2016 (google drive link) Full disclosure I pasted the main article from Metal Hammer's awful awful website because my hands are sad (from doing things like this, yes. Don't keep doing things if they hurt, yes even if you're super super excited about a guy.)

There is life after death. First, there’s Hell.

When the news first broke that Joey Jordison was no longer in Slipknot, it sent shockwaves around the world. Here was this icon of our world and one of the founding members of one of the greatest bands to emerge in all of 30 years suddenly, inexplicably gone. In the heavy wake of Paul Gray’s passing it seemed almost too great a blow for any band, even one with nine members. Anyone who knows their travails understands that they’re less a band and more like a dysfunctional family – had their problems caught up with them? But reappear they did, to the sound of a rapturously received album, and the three-ring circus of Knotfest, and yet still questions remained about the circumstances of Joey’s departure. Slipknot were tightlipped, and Joey? It was anyone’s guess.

I’m humbled to say that we now have Joey’s side of the story, and this month’s world-exclusive journey to Des Moines is one of the most powerful, saddening and inspirational stories you’ll read in these pages. Sure, there are the new records – Vimic and Sinsaeneum (sic) herald one of our world’s greatest musicians returning to the fold and from the sound of things we’ve some tremendous records ahead of us.

More importantly though, we have one of metal’s greatest figures back, and we couldn’t be more delighted to see him back on his feet – literally. To read Dom Lawson’s tale of a man who’s truly been there and back again, see p.38. Make sure you’re sitting down, because Travis Shinn’s remarkable photography is as stark as it it worth not one, but over 3,000 words.

Thank you for reading, and… Stay metal! Alex, Editör-In-Chief

Out Of The Shadows

Since his shock exit from Slipknot, Joey Jordison has remained silent. For the first time, he opens up about the split, the debilitating condition that left him unable to walk, and how he's been reborn anew

Words: Dom Lawson • Pics: Travis Shinn

Joey Jordison unmasked: the ultimate interview

Part One - Revelation

“This is very important to me. You’re getting something that I have not told anyone. It’s very emotional. It’s fucking hardcore, man.”

Joey Jordison has got a few things to get off his chest. More importantly, the world has got a few questions for the erstwhile Slipknot alumnus and the 21st century’s most celebrated percussive polymath, not least because he has been resolutely off the radar for the last few years.

The last time Metal Hammer spoke directly to Joey, he was promoting his then-newly-formed band Scar The Martyr, who released their self-titled debut album in September 2013. Three months later, he was seemingly dismissed from Slipknot, the band he had enjoyed huge global success with ever since they exploded into our world back in 1999.

Since that startling news broke in December 2013, Joey has been conspicuous by his absence from our ears, eyes and screens. This being the age of endless social media speculation, his disappearance and departure from Slipknot have been widely discussed online, one commonly espoused theory being that the diminutive drummer had gone spectacularly off the rails and was simply unable to fulfill his usual duties, thus prompting his bandmates’ decision to effect an unexpected lineup change.

In truth, only Joey’s closest friends and business associates know what he’s been up to for the last couple of years, but as he warmly greets Hammer at the door of the house he shares with girlfriend Amanda in Des Moines, it’s immediately apparent that today’s interview is much more than just an opportunity to herald the arrival of not one, but two new bands and Joey’s wholesale return to action. Instead, this is what he describes as “an opportunity to tell everyone what the fuck has been going on”. And it’s almost certainly not what anyone is expecting.

“It was at the end of the memorial shows we did for Paul,” Joey begins, referencing the death of bandmate Paul Gray and the subsequent world tour that began in the summer of 2011 and continued until August 2012. “We were in Canada, at the end of my last run of shows with Slipknot, and something happened to me but I didn’t know what it was. I was super ill. You can be sick and still play, but this was something I’d never felt in my life before.

“We found out that what I have is acute transverse myelitis. It’s a neurological condition that hits your spinal cord and it wiped my legs out completely. It’s like having your legs cut off, basically. I played those last couple of shows and it scared the living shit out of me. I didn’t know what it was. Everyone thought I was fucked up, but it wasn’t the case. I wasn’t even drinking. Everything was straight-laced and fucking perfect. Everything was on point. But I had to be carried to the stage…”

Joey pauses, wincing at the memory. “The pain was something I’d never experienced in my life before, and I wouldn’t wish it on my worst enemy.”

When he arrived home from the Slipknot tour, Joey could barely walk. On August 21, 2012, he was admitted to Mercy West hospital in Des Moines, diagnosed with some form of leg paralysis but unaware of exactly how or why this was happening to him. Ten days later, he was transferred to the neurological unit at University Of Iowa Hospital in Iowa City, understandably terrified and extremely confused about his physical deterioration.

“It was fucking bad, dude,” he recalls. “My lady has everything documented. I got struck with this fucking thing that I couldn’t control. The doctors said I might not be able to walk again. Today, I can almost run, but back then I couldn’t even stand up. I was bed-ridden. If I wanted to turn over in bed, I had to move my legs with my hands. I was in and out of the hospital for months.

“Some beautiful people have helped me out and got me back stronger and taught me how to walk again, but at that moment my whole life was screwed, man. Acute transverse myelitis is a fucked-up disease and a lot of people don’t recover from it and they’re paralysed forever.”

After having braces fitted to prevent his weakened legs from buckling, Joey was finally discharged from hospital in October 2012. Thus began an extremely lengthy, challenging and physically exhausting regime of physical and occupational therapy, as Joey tried to summon the energy and determination to beat the bizarre neurological condition that had wrenched the carpet from under his feet and left him both horribly vulnerable and understandably bewildered.

Early in 2013, work began on Scar The Martyr’s debut album, as a further batch of Slipknot shows in Japan and Europe – including a headline slot at Download – loomed over the horizon. Still recovering from the worst of his illness, Joey somehow managed to recover to the point where he was able to perform at those gigs, after which he threw himself wholeheartedly into launching Scar The Martyr by hitting the road as main support to Danzig in the US.

All the while, of course, his global army of admirers remained entirely in the dark about the turmoil and trials going on behind the scenes. It was widely noted that Joey was looking overweight and far from healthy during Scar The Martyr’s debut UK tour, but the conclusions that most people were jumping to – in essence, that he had a problem with drugs and/or drink – were completely off target. Unfortunately, when Slipknot announced on December 12, 2013, that they were to forge ahead without their talismanic drummer, those rumours seemed to gain a little extra momentum.

“Yeah, and that’s why I love being able to do this interview, because finally I get to tell the fucking truth!” Joey declares. “It’s been really frustrating, but I can only bless the people that have been around me and helped me to get back to this point. And this is what I want to clarify for my fans…” – he punches his hand to emphasise the importance of this statement – “…it had nothing to do with fucking drugs or fucking alcohol!”

Several times during our interview, Joey’s eyes fill with tears. It’s abundantly clear that the extraordinary effort required to confront acute transverse myelitis and doggedly chase a light at the end of a seriously dark and bleak tunnel has taken a lot out of him, particularly on an emotional level. But now that he is about to click into top gear once again, via new bands Vimic and Sinsaenum, Joey is channeling his energies towards a cathartic clearing of the decks, and setting people straight about his life over the last five years is top of the agenda.

“Life takes you on weird trips and you just have to hold on, ride the wave and be as strong as you fucking can,” he shrugs. “I’ve been through so much fucking shit over the last few years and people just don’t know.”

Part Two - Struggle

The news that Joey had seemingly been sacked from Slipknot came as a huge shock to everyone, even without the additional knowledge of his devastating health problems. From the band’s enormous fanbase, through to many of us in the metal world that have always known him to be, at the very least, a wholly dedicated and passionate member of that 18-legged, arena-smashing entity, it was a wildly unexpected turn of events.

The band’s own public statements at the time took a predictably passive course, the relatively benign implication being that Joey and his former comrades were simply heading in different creative directions and could no longer work together effectively.

On January 2, 2014, he made his own statement on Facebook, making it plain that as far as he was concerned, there was no mutual agreement and he had been fired from Slipknot for reasons unknown.

“I was laying in bed with my lady, I’d been in rehabilitation for my health issues but everything was good, and the next thing I know…” he pauses, visibly upset. “No band meeting? None. Anything from management? No, nothing. All I got was a stupid fucking email saying that I was out of the band that I busted my ass my whole life to fucking create, you know?

“It was the weirdest fucking thing. I can’t imagine just sending Corey or Shawn or Mick a fucking letter, without a band meeting. We’re friends and we’ve been through so much shit together, but that was all it was, a fucking letter. That’s exactly what happened and it was hurtful, man. I didn’t deserve that shit after what I’d done and everything I’d been through.”

In light of revelations about his state of health at the time, it does seem an unusually abrupt way to bring such a longstanding partnership to an end. Joey even claims to have written and demoed a batch of new material, aided by Slipknot’s then-touring bassist Donnie Steele, and circulated it among his bandmates in an attempt to get the compositional ball rolling. But, according to the drummer, no one got back to him to discuss the new songs: subtle evidence, perhaps, that wires were distinctly crossed.

“They got confused about my health issues, and obviously even I didn’t know what it was at first,” Joey sighs. “They thought I was fucked-up on drugs, which I wasn’t at all. I don’t blame them for being concerned, but when you’re friends and you’ve been through so much stuff, you fucking talk to each other. But I harbour no bad feelings toward them at all, because I’ve moved on with my life. I’m happier than I’ve been in years. You need to move on, close the fucking chapter and, in the end, it is what it is.”

It is a testament to the positive way Joey has endeavoured to overcome his severe health problems that today, even after having been unceremoniously ejected from one of the biggest metal bands on the planet, he is hearteningly sanguine about the way things have turned out.

During our conversation, he repeatedly declares how grateful he is for the friends, family and life that he has, and even when discussing the end of his tenure as Slipknot’s drummer, he is eager to state how much he still loves and admires his former bandmates. What is perhaps more surprising is that Joey not only made a point of checking out .5: The Gray Chapter, the album Slipknot made without him and released in 2014, but is also effusive in his praise for it.

“Honestly, I have a long history with those guys, so I give them the respect they deserve and I listened to the whole record multiple times,” he smiles. “And I think it’s great! It’s fucking cool and I’m glad they moved on. I’m not like, ‘I’m not gonna give them respect!’ – I’m not a coward like that. I’m glad they’re carrying on the name, because what’s important is the fans. There’s no stupid battle going on. There’s no point in saying, ‘Fuck them!’

“No, I’ve been through so many things with those guys and I love them very much. What’s hurtful is that the way it [being fired] went down was not fucking right. That’s all I want to say. The way they did it was fucking cowardly. It was fucked up. But the love in my heart for those guys, that stays the same.”

It is at this point that Metal Hammer asks the inevitable and unavoidable question: despite everything that has happened, would Joey be willing to rejoin Slipknot further down the line? As much as his successor, Jay Weinberg, has acquitted himself brilliantly while filling the shoes of a contemporary drumming legend, it’s hard to deny that most Slipknot fans would be beside themselves with joy if Joey were to return to the fold. He takes a deep, measured inward breath and fixes us with a stern stare…

“Let me think about how to answer that, because it’s a big one,” he nods. “Honestly, I’m not trying to be dramatic, but if that was brought up, what I’d want to do would be to get together. Not just have a phone call or some stupid email. I’d want to see them, just hug it out and feel that energy that we had when we were fucking young and hungry and all that shit. They’re my brothers. We’d hug and talk and do shit like we used to do. We used to sit up all night long planning this shit and what we wanted to do. So that’s how I’d wanna do it. It’d have to be in person. If it happened, that would be fucking awesome, but only time will tell.”

Part Three - Rebirth

Back in the here and now, Joey Jordison is well on his way to being fighting fit once again. His recovery is still ongoing, of course, and daily trips to see his trainer at the local gym have now become an essential part of his day-to-day schedule, but as he speaks, he radiates sincere positivity. That said, the effort it has taken Joey to get from suddenly and horrifyingly being robbed of the use of his legs to a point where he is able to unveil two brand new albums with different bands is etched into his subtly expressive face.

He and better half Amanda have kept a detailed scrapbook of photos and other memorabilia from the long, hard road back from the onset of transverse myelitis. They allow us to leaf through it, and it brings the jarring reality of Joey’s last few years vividly to life. It’s a litany of woes, pain and frustration that many of us would regard as insurmountable, but even when faced with yet another grim obstacle, when he fell and broke his leg while in the studio recording Vimic’s debut album in the autumn of 2014, leading to his leg being cut in half and the insertion of steel rods and bolts, Joey’s determination to prevail and come back stronger than ever has been unwavering.

“I did question everything, like, ‘What am I going to do?’, not knowing if I was going to recover,” he admits. “It hurt a lot. It was a big question. But there was a definite point where I thought about all the blessings I’ve been given in life, being part of Slipknot and playing with Korn and Ministry and Rob Zombie and doing Roadrunner United and all those things, and you look at that and you’re grateful, and so you bust your ass to get back. I didn’t feel sorry for myself. I do not quit. I’ve got fans I’ve got to take care of, you know? So there’s no hiding right now.”

If you want to know what the opposite of hiding sounds like, you need only lend an ear to either or both of the new records that Joey is releasing this summer. The first is Echoes Of The Tortured, the debut album from Sinsaenum, Joey’s collaboration with Dragonforce’s Frédéric Leclercq and a host of underground luminaries. A monstrous but eminently accessible death metal record, its jaw-shattering eruptions of blastbeats and epic fury showcase the full extent of Joey’s physical recovery in no uncertain terms.

The second is Open Your Omen, the first album from Vimic, which is essentially Scar The Martyr with a new vocalist, former Korn percussionist and back-up singer Kalen Chase. It’s a sharper, more focused record than its (sort of) predecessor, planting Joey firmly back in belligerent mainstream metal territory, with plenty of the huge hooks and irresistible riffs that his loyal fans will be feverishly anticipating. But beyond the new music itself, Joey’s true focus is on the unparalleled joy he is currently experiencing as he escapes the nightmare of the last few years and returns to what he does best.

“This is a rebirth, and reaching this point is the ultimate reward,” he states. “It’s like having the ultimate trophies, having these two bands. These opportunities are coming back to me and it feels like a complete renewal. These are real bands, not side-projects. Everything I do goes at 100%… maybe even 666%, ha ha!

“At a certain age, a lot of people] become vegetarians or they find religion, but I’m never gonna stop being a fucking weirdo and a fucking metalhead! You wake up one day and you realise that nothing’s ever gonna change and you’re fucking committed. I’ve been like that since I was five years old, man.

“Right now, I just want to keep creating. These bands are two huge fucking journeys for me. It’s like when you see a rollercoaster that you’ve never ridden before, and you’re fucking scared, but you’re in line and waiting, like I am now, and then once you step on? You’re in!”

There are a few lessons to be learned from the story of Joey Jordison’s last few traumatic years. Firstly, maybe we should all be slightly less eager to jump to hasty conclusions when faced with only one side of a story (or, indeed, no verified information whatsoever). Secondly, never underestimate the strength, persistence, passion and potential of the human spirit.

“The most pertinent lesson of all, however, is one we all should have learned a long time ago: Joey Jordison is an unstoppable force of nature and, after fighting the toughest battle of his entire life, he’s primed and ready to make up for lost time and to remind the world that loud, angry, fucked up and furious music remains the best medicine of all.

“I have this weird-ass condition, but it doesn’t limit me and I’m getting better all the time,” he concludes with a confident grin. “I can play just as fast, or faster, than I ever have. Everything is fucking cool and I’m at the gym every day and it’s all going well. That helps me out so much.

“I went through some serious fucking shit. People didn’t know and I can’t blame them for that. But the thing is, you get up in the morning and you look in the mirror, and then you go off and fucking do it. You live your life the way you want to, and get the work done! What else can I say, dude? It’s good to tell my story. I’m fucking back and I’m ready to go full force. This is the best fucking job in the world. I’m never gonna stop.”

What Is Transverse Myelitis?

We spoke to Lew Gray, secretary of UK charity the Transverse Myelitis Society, to understand what Joey’s batling…

Can you explain what the condition means? Lew: “Transverse myelitis is an inflammation of the spinal cord. You have a lot of nerves doing different things in your spinal cord, so the facts of each case depend on which part of the spinal cord is affected. It can be high in the spinal cord affecting the arms, or you may struggle to breathe because the muscles in your lungs don’t work. It could be lower, affecting different sensory nerves. Some people with transverse myelitis can walk but can’t feel the floor beneath their feet, or they can’t feel hot and cold or pain. We think there are about 250 cases a year in the UK.”

Does it typically come on quickly or is it more of a gradual process? “It can be either. A lot of people are paralysed within an hour or two. But then for other people it can be very gradual and come and go over a period of months. It takes some people years to get a diagnosis.”

What treatment is available? “Really, the only treatment is to dose you with steroids. They will reduce the inflammation, and therefore you’re not curing it, you’re minimising the damage until it goes away by itself. Physiotherapy is very important. Almost everyone gets some spontaneous recovery over time after transverse myelitis, but the body and mind ‘forget’ how to use muscles and nerves that are not working, so the purpose of neurophysiotherapy is to ‘guide’ the recovery.”

What is the long-term prognosis for someone with transverse myelitis? “The nerves are capable of regenerating themselves. Nobody can predict though how well they will regenerate, how long it will take, or if they will at all. The majority of people get improvement, but there is no cast-iron guarantee.”

How common are relapses? “We do know people who have had recurrences, however that is rare. Sometimes a reoccurrence of transverse myelitis leads to a diagnosis of MS [multiple sclerosis].”

For more on the Transverse Myelitis Society, visit www.myelitis.org.uk

Beating The Odds

How Joey Jordison fought his way back from paralysis to prosperity

The full extent of Joey’s arduous battle with acute transverse myelitis is brought into sharp focus when we visit Absolute Performance Therapy in Waukee, Des Moines. Joey spent months here, working on his recovery, and the mere fact that today he is able to walk through the front door without assistance speaks volumes about what he has achieved. His therapist, Alyssa Subbert, has nothing but praise for his determined approach.

“Being stubborn helped the most!” she laughs. “To go from being someone who could do anything to not being able to get out of a chair, then to get back to being able to do everything again, it was a huge process. He wanted to drum again so bad, and as long as we made every exercise about drumming, he’d do it. He was very stubborn and very ornery, but he’d work and work until his body was too sore.”

Gruelling physical work aside, it is obvious that Joey’s time at APT was also hugely emotional. He hasn’t been back since finishing his treatment, and there are tears as he and Alyssa recall the intense therapy sessions and ferocious perseverance and teamwork that were needed to make each successive triumph a reality along the way.

“This was a huge wake-up call to Joey’s health and lifestyle, and how physical his job is,” Alyssa states. “When you’ve done something like that forever, you have no concept of it. He has to play in a drum set that rotates and goes upside down?! It’s not a regular job, sitting at a computer. We even practised mobbing him! Does he have balance when a whole bunch of people mob him, you know? It’s a whole different life, and very physical. So this was a completely unique process we went through.”

Joey’s physical therapy may be over, but his daily trips to local gym Life Time Athletic are an essential part of his recovery, not to mention his ability to play drums with the power and skill that fans have come to expect. His personal trainer, Caleb Herman, is a Slipknot fan who’s full of admiration for his client’s dedication.

“When Joey came in, he could hardly walk,” Caleb recalls. “Now he’s pressing 700lbs and he can do a step above what most people can do. He’s got one of the strongest back muscle groups I’ve ever seen. He couldn’t stand without help, but now he can stand up by himself, so his progress has been awesome. When he sees progress, he becomes motivated, and he tells me he gets the chills, and that gives me the chills. It’s really exciting to see him get to this point.”

Battle Of The Bands

After a long absence from our world, Joey’s returning with two new projects. But how do Vimic and Sinsaenum stack up against each other?

Vimic

Members: Joey Jordison (drums), Kalen Chase (vocals), Matt Tarach (keyboards), Jed Simon (guitar), Kyle Konkiel (bass). Sound: Crunchy, state-of-the-art modern metal with big, anthemic melodies and plenty of snotty aggression. Image: Lots of black leather, long hair, beards and menacing scowls. Sample lyric: ‘Simple skeletons, playing God again/We’re getting higher, we’re getting higher, and the truth will set us free’ (Simple Skeletons). Drumming: Lashings of classic Joey, from that Slipknot stomp and big, muscular grooves to bursts of high-velocity blasting. Joey says: “Scar The Martyr was the blueprint, but we wiped the slate clean. This is heavy shit. Kalen killed it on this record.” For fans of: Slipknot, Disturbed, Fear Factory. Check out: Earth Stood Still. Lurching, syncopated grooves and soaring, post-grunge melodies collide in a brutish, multi-tempo anthem that deftly showcases singer Kalen’s versatility.

Sinsaenum

Members: Joey Jordison (drums), Frédéric Leclercq (guitar), Heimoth (bass), Attila Csihar (vocals), Sean Zatorsky (vocals), Stéphane Buriez (guitar). Sound: Epic, imperious, blackened death metal with tons of eerie atmosphere. Image: Classic, dark, extreme metal attitude with a dash of theatrical corpse paint and a blood-splattered logo. Sample lyric: ‘We are the pain inside your head/We are the sorrow in your soul/We are the fire/We are the rusty nails’ (Army Of Chaos). Drumming: A masterclass in death metal precision and power. Proof that Joey is back and blazing. Joey says: “Sinsaenum is probably one of the most extreme and proficient bands I have ever been in. These guys are fucking on point at all times. We’re a fucking army!” For fans of: Morbid Angel, Dimmu Borgir, Behemoth. Check out: Inverted Cross. It’s blistering, heads-down death metal grandeur with anti-Christian lyrics, fret-melting solos and countless warped twists and turns.

Sin City

As well as making his comeback with Vimic, Joey Jordison’s taken up the drum stool for death metal project Sinsaenum. Mastermind and Dragonforce bassist Frédéric Leclercq explains how it came thundering to life

Words: Dayal Patterson

While Vimic represents a beefed-up reboot of Scar The Martyr, Joey’s also been behind the kit for a second, brand new band - Sinsaenum. The brainchild of Dragonforce bassist Frédéric Leclercq, it’s a more murky blend of death and black metal, featuring the twosome alongside some of the leading lights of the extreme scene, including dual vocals from Mayhem’s Attila Csihar and Dååth’s Sean Zatorsky. We asked Frédéric what the supergroup have planned for their dark future.

How did Sinsaenum first come about? Frédéric: “Oh Christ, even I have trouble remembering when it started! I always wrote death metal songs. I started to write in 1998, then I was doing something else [he played in the French bands Memoria and Heavenly], and I’m still doing something else, with Dragonforce. The first person I spoke to was Stéphane [Buriez, guitar] from Loudblast. It must’ve been in 2010 that we said, ‘Let’s really do something about it.’”

How did Joey get involved? “I kept writing more songs, and one day in 2013 I got a text from Joey. We call each other ‘Morbid Angel” – don’t ask why – so the text said, ‘Morbid Angel, what you up to?’ I was like, ‘Well, I just got back from tour… talking about Morbid Angel, I have these death metal songs.’ He was like, ‘You should send them to me!’ Two days later, he came back like, ‘Fuck yeah, that’s really cool. Who’s playing drums? I want to do it.’ So I started to ask more people that I had in mind.”

How did you guys meet? “We did the Mayhem tour together in the US, in 2008. One day drinking we were talking about death metal, and then we got to talking about it more and more. That’s how you get to know people – you find what you have in common. We had drinking and Morbid Angel.”

What about the other guys? “Stéphane I’ve known for 20 years. I played in a band in my hometown, Charleville-Mézières, and we supported his band, Loudblast. They were a big influence, and the first death metal band I heard. We kept in touch because France is a small country when it comes to metal. With [bassist] Heimoth from [French black metal band] Seth, it’s the same – there’s a small metal community. Dragonforce and Mayhem did a festival together, and Attila came onto the bus and said: ‘My son is a fan and would love an autograph – by the way, I’m the vocalist of Mayhem.’ He’s such a nice person – maybe you shouldn’t write that, keep the mystery! Sean and I met when Dååth was opening for Dragonforce in 2009. I really liked his voice and his attitude.”

How much music was written before you started working with them? “When Joey sent that text, all the songs were half-written, because I’ve a tendency to write a song with just a verse and a chorus, maybe a mid-section, because I know the rest is in my head. So when he said, ‘I’m interested,’ I was like, ‘Oh shit, I have to finish the songs!’ I sent out files, because it was clear that people trusted my ‘vision’. They didn’t want to change too much. I had to finalise lyrics with Sean and Attila, and Stéphane contributed to the structure. Joey added some fills. I decided to make it a concept album using interludes like Tiamat, or Pestilence, or even Type O Negative did to create atmosphere, so I had to write those.”

What was it like working with your heroes? “I felt like a kid in a toy store! Being in a studio with Attila singing songs that I wrote, and saying, ‘Oh, you should do this song like [Mayhem’s] De Mysteriis Dom Sathanas, and him being like, [adopts a Hungarian accent] ‘OK bro’, it’s like ‘Fuck, this is happening!’ I shouldn’t sound so excited, ‘cause this is black and death metal, but I had a big smile during the whole process – we all did. On Army Of Chaos we have Schmier from Destruction and Mika and Mirai from Sigh. Mika and Mirai are good friends of mine and are doing the big choirs, the choruses… like Sepultura’s Stronger Than Hate [from 1989’s Beneath The Remains]. I remember reading the booklet as a kid… they had the guys from Obituary and Atheist on it, and I was like, ‘Fuck, that’s cool.’ And it’s Schmier who’s singing on the last pre-chorus.

Did Joey’s health battles affect Sinsaenum? “Not at all. He speaks about it way better than I, so I won’t comment on that. I’ve kept away from all the troubles. I was like, ‘I’m a friend. If you want to talk, I’ll listen, but I just want to make sure you’re happy.’ As far as health problems, he was fine – he killed the drums. I don’t know how he did it, but he said, ‘Dude, I’m on fire.’ He was angry, I guess.”

Will Sinsaenum tour? “It’s definitely something we want to do, but there’s no rush. I want to do everything the same way I lived it as a kid. These bands I loved, I loved their albums, but I didn’t see them live for a long time and it didn’t bother me. I want people to digest the album – there’s a lot of information on there. Plus, we’re all busy; it’s difficult to get us all in a room. We rehearsed before doing the videos, and being in the same room, it was like, ‘Fucking hell.’”

What’s happening with Dragonforce right now? “We’re doing summer festivals and writing the new album that will come out next year, so I have to juggle between doing Sinsaenum stuff and writing and recording with Dragonforce. So my head is about to explode, but that’s fine!”

What do you get from Sinsaenum that you don’t get with Dragonforce? “This is really the music I love. I like Dragonforce stuff, and I write more of it now, but sometimes I don’t agree with all the decisions. With Sinsaenum, from A to Z it is exactly what I want. I guess it’s my baby. It gives me a way to express the dark side of myself and show it to people – if they care or not, that’s another issue!”

Sinsaenum release Echoes Of The Tortured on July 29 via Earmusic 

[jh0721]

VW Karmann Ghia

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Drawings from some time ago

[robby3472drivetime]

[jh0721]

VW Karmann Ghia

[actuallysaiyan]

Elope With Me(Kamina x Fem!Reader)

warnings: fluff, angst, yet another fix-it fic for this loveable goofball, mentions of elopement, jealousy word count: 1.2k pairings: Kamina x Fem!Reader summary: Kamina gives you a beautifully preserved flower that his father had given to his mother in the hopes that you'll come to the surface with him and elope. though things don't pan out exactly as you two both imagined, the flower comes back into play after you nurse him back to health. a/n: another Kamina fic? yes! will this get 8 notes? yes! do I care? no! A wonderful fic for the @pixelcafe-network's challenge Friday! I had so much fun with this!

dividers: @adornedwithlight

taglist: @cherryblossombankai @pixelcafe-network

Most people had lost someone while living in Giha village. The earthquakes had caused a lot of cave-ins. And if it wasn’t the earthquakes, some people had tried to go to the surface and died as a result. 

Kamina wasn’t an exception. His father left for the surface when he was younger, and his mother had unfortunately died when he was very young as well. Your own parents died due to the very same earthquake that caused the cave-in that killed Simon’s parents.

The three of you: Simon, Kamina and you, had become very close because of this. Kamina was obviously the leader of your little gang and he often tried to rope in more people because of it. And after a while, you started to admire him for all of this.

But your admiration for Kamina turned into something different. No longer did you see him as “big bro” and more in a “who is this hunk who replaced itty bitty Kamina” kind of way.

Kamina wasn’t blind to you changing in front of his eyes too. You weren’t a little girl chasing after him anymore. You were a lovely young woman and any man would be lucky to have you in their life. He chooses to try and ignore his growing feelings for you in an attempt to keep your friendship sacred.

But fuck, it was tearing him apart inside. And him wanting to go to the surface, he needed to make sure you’d follow him up there. So he tries his best to come up with the proper way to make this proposal.

He searches through some of the things his father and mother left behind. There are only just a few mementos. He looks at the picture of his lovely mother; the only thing he has left of her. Then under a few other things, he finds a beautifully preserved flower. It was pink with long thread-like stamens, as well as spidery seed pods. When he flips over the flower, there’s a card.

“To my lovely beautiful darling Wenny, 

This is the only thing I can give to you to show you my love is never ending. Please remember that this flower means ‘Elope with me’. That is what we did, even when everyone seemed against us. Our love will never die, just like this flower.

Love,

Joe”

Kamina is surprised. He never knew that his father had given this to his mother. It was a lovely flower, though a little odd looking. Most women probably preferred other things, but given that you both live underground, you’ll probably just love the fact that he gave you a flower.

He takes the flower and makes his way over to you. Despite his mostly cocky attitude and confidence skyrocketing most days, Kamina finds himself very nervous. He sees you in your room, and he knocks on the rock.

“Knock, knock.” He says sarcastically and you laugh.

“Hey Kamina, come in.”

Kamina steps inside, pulling the curtain to shut your room. He then sits on your bed with you, unsure of how to even come out and say what he means. YOu notice he’s fidgeting with something in his hands, so you gently place your own hands on his.

“Penny for your thoughts.” you say softly, pulling him from his nervousness.

He hands you the preserved flower. You’re in awe of the beautiful and unique little thing. Your eyes widen when you notice the card in the back. Kamina takes your hands in his and he’s smiling that overly confident smile.

“Listen to me,” he starts. “One of these days, I’m going up to the surface. And when that day comes, sooner or later, I want you up there with me!”

You blush. “Oh Kamina, you know I’m going to the surface with you! I wouldn’t dream of staying in this place without you.”

This is when he cups your cheeks and pulls you in for a sweet kiss. Your heart races and you melt into his sweet embrace. Kamina holds you close to his chest.

“That flower means to elope…so when we get outta here, let’s do it! Let’s elope!”

His words ring in your ears. You can’t believe he’s truly saying this. You’ve been in love with Kamina for so long, and to finally have him make some sort of move on you, it’s making you feel very warm and fuzzy inside.

“Yes, we’ll elope. On the surface!” You say finally. You give him another kiss and you two swear on it.

But when you two get to the surface, things are completely different than you envisioned. Of course, Yoko is so beautiful and she captures the eye of your beau.

She’s tough, she doesn’t put up with his shit. The way she charms him, it breaks your heart. You keep the little preserved flower, hoping that one day, you will meet someone who’s made you feel the way that Kamina once did.

Months go by after making your way up to the surface. Things are different now. You know that you don’t have a chance with Kamina. Even if you still have his gift, you know that you could never interfere with his blossoming love with Yoko.

And after that close call with Thymilph, your heart ached for the man you loved even more. Every day after him almost losing his life, you spend every single second at his bedside. 

You take control over his care. Something about this really warms his heart. To see you here at his side after he almost lost his life. Kamina clings to the little glimmer of hope that he’ll finally make it through. He know that you being around really makes him feel like he can get healthy and lively again.

Then one day, you come in and you’ve got a big bouquet of flowers in your hand. You place them in a vase next to the window. Kamina looks over and he notices that the flowers look very familiar.

“Are those…” he begins then he walks over to them.

“Cleome. They are cleome flowers.” You say softly.

He gets closer and takes a deep inhale of the flowers. The scent is so nice and fresh, making him feel happy. He looks at you and smiles.

“Kamina, I—”

But he interrupts you with a deep kiss. He wraps his arms around you, pulling you closer to his body. You hold him close to yourself, deepening the kiss as well. Then you rub your nose against his before leaning your forehead to his.

“I was foolish,” Kamina explains. “Foolish to get wrapped up in the excitement of being on the surface without seeing how you felt.”

“Kamina, I’m fine.”

“No! No, I completely ignored your wants, desires and feelings for my own selfish gain.” He kisses you once more. “But not this time. I want to know how you feel.”

You take a deep breath and then you explain how seeing him get so close to Yoko had made you jealous. Though you tried hard to push your feelings for him away, you just couldn’t do it permanently.

“Baby, I’m crushed. I shouldn’t have made you feel like second best.” He says solemnly. He gently caresses your cheek. “Could you ever forgive me?”

You giggle softly. “Kamina, what do you think the flowers are for? I forgive you…and I love you.”

Kamina grins and he spins you around in his arms; it’s a testament to his strength now that he has healed completely. He kisses you over and over, the grin never leaving his face.

“Those flowers mean elope, right? Then…elope with me, Kamina.”

He smirks, “I wouldn’t have it any other way.”

reblogs and comments always appreciated!

©actuallysaiyan 2025– do not repost on other platforms, copy, translate or edit my works!

[lumilasi]

So....normally with these so far, I've doodled couple more portraits for the ref, and this was due to them all being brand new characters, meaning I needed more angles drawn about them to grasp how they look like properly.

HOWEVER, Ava is literally my most drawn character, being my main one for my OG story/world, so I decided I won't need to do that for her space AU version. The changes I did for Ava apart from her outfit are very minor, just normal human ears and different hair-color/human eyes. I did pick her an actual IRL surname too, as using her OG didn't really fit together with the rest, being a fantasy one.

(If you are curious of her main story/design, here is her current ref dump post)

Au Ava/this crew's major overarching story info below:

Ava is not just a researcher on a rescue-crew spaceship: she used to/still works with a group that was actively trying to expose the unethical experiments done to people like Stefan when he was a child, and find a way to cure them from the side-effects of these experiments.

They managed to complete their first goal, and currently she is focused on finding a cure for Stefan and other victims' "G.I.H.A-Syndrome" which stands for Gas Induced Hallucination Aggression Syndrome. or just GIHAS in short.

The name comes from their condition being triggered by the inhalation of a special type of gas that was discovered 40 years ago. It was found to be much safer alternative for a lot of systems especially with space industry, as it was seemingly non-toxic and not easily flammable. However, while this is not widely known, it can cause vivid hallucinations to some people, although what dictates this reaction is still unknown.

The victims/test subjects like Stefan were conditioned to it from early childhood, where it could potentially be used for mind control, for sleeper agent assassins. (Stefan is actually the only "Successful" test subject, as all others so far have lacked the aggression, or were uncontrollable/paralyzed by fear in their hallucinating state. Stefan in turn, naturally developed a "trigger" for his aggression, and can actually select his targets, rather than going after people mindlessly - most of the time)

For Ava this is personal, given her fiancee Roman is also one of these child test subjects. He is currently held at the special facility her parents manage, because his hallucinations might cause him to lash out, and he's become quite paranoid. (The condition can get bad enough that you won't need the gas anymore - just the trigger.)

Nadiya and her crew are helping her with the research, as their job often takes them into the most remote regions of space that could hold important and useful data for her. They also allow her to work on this in secret.

Ava was the one that convinced Nadiya to take Stefan in the ship, as she knew he was one of the GIHAS patients, AND she was one of the women in the previous ship he worked at, just in disguise. She was on an undercover mission to keep an eye on Stefan for the organization that experimented on him, as she was doing a double agent task. (She was also part of the team that raided the prison he was in, that was continuing these experiments, but Stefan fled before she could take him with rest of the patients to the facility where they are currently being held for their own safety, while cure is being searched)

She often goes on a side-mission with her android companion as part of her own research, whom she rescued years ago, and had a friend help repair for her (The android is gonna be the final member for this crew, I'll make them later)

IN REGARDS TO TULPAR CREW

Ava doesn't interact with them as much as the rest, but has some thoughts about each still:

CURLY: She sympathizes with the difficult situation he was in, after all she's seen first-hand, multiple times, what corporate greed does, how it can put people in impossible situations. She also understands the psychological hold his toxic, manipulative friend had on him. Ava is still critical of him of course, but she's too busy with her own mission to dwell in this that much. The threat is gone, the crew is going home with any medical needs being taken care of, that's all she needs to know.

ANYA: She of course feels sorry for her, and what she went through, and also admires how despite it all, Anya is still persisting, even helping Cherry with medical duties. She would not judge her of course even if she DID struggle to hold herself together, and would not want to continue her nurse duty anymore.

DAISUKE: He's quite amusing as Nadiya also puts it. His cheerfulness reminds her of some people at home that she knows of, and its funny seeing Stefan try not to look so annoyed when he has to listen to him and Mara babble about Pokemon....

SWANSEA: His grumpy old man energy is VERY funny to her, because it again reminds her of some people she knows. Specifically one of the dads of her frenemy Irina.

[phatcatphergus]

Not the GIHA 😭

[bcgandsmurfsfan2010]

Tilly is ready

Inspired by a scene in my fanfic "Gihae Style

In this drawing, Tilly is being ready for the Gihae Expedition reenactment after being up all night looking through Books about the Joseon Dynasty,Big City Greens belongs to Disney

[enosai]

Was commissioned by copperishardhat and ZeRoBeAt98 on twitter to draw their OC's! Giha and Rollin (with my cyber elves) in the Cave Story art style! This was blast to make, thank you so much!

@copperonthisplace

[fictionaladoptionpolls]

Simon the Digger

Age: 14

Home: Giha Village (Tengen Toppa Gurren Lagann)

Likes: Nia, drills, striking the earth and/or piercing the heavens

Dislikes: Earthquakes, cave-ins

Mech: Lagann, Gurren Lagann, or Tengen Toppa Lagann

Simon is really good at digging, which is good. Giha Village is located underground, and while it has all the clean water, livestock, and electricity a community could ask for, it also has a problem where parts of the village cave in and need to be dug out again. A seismically-induced cave-in squished Simon’s parents, but he kept digging regardless. His adventures truly started when he found a mysterious drill bit and a mech clearly designed to form the h…wait, that’s Voltron.

Anyways. Simon starts the series as a nice, quiet kid. Polite, humble, shy, fearful. He fought Beastmen in giant mech battles, but only because his friends both encouraged and needed him to. He eventually grows into a braver and more confident man, but only after getting too old for consideration in this bracket. Though whatever his age, he’s self-sacrificing, to a degree dangerous to both his enemies and himself.

I’m sorry I couldn’t find much to say about Simon. And Tumblr doesn’t have a lot of text posts specifically about Simon for me to draw on. I’m sorry this profile is so short, but I really need to move on to the next one if i want to start the next round of polls this month…

[jh0721]

VW Karmann Ghia

[anarkistan]

A.5.5 Anarşîstên Di Dagirkerên Kargeha Îtalî de

Wergera Makîne Piştî dawiya Şerê Cîhanê yê Yekem li Ewropa û cîhanê radîkalîzasyoneke mezin çêbû. Endamtiya sendîkayan teqiya, grev, xwenîşandan û ajîtasyon giha asteke mezin. Ev hinekî ji ber şer bû, hinekî jî ji ber serkeftina eşkere ya Şoreşa Rûsyayê bû. Ev coşa ji bo Şoreşa Rûsyayê heta gihaşt anarşîstên ferdperest ên mîna Joseph Labadie, yê ku mîna gelek antî-kapîtalîstên din, dît ku “sora…

[markedforsorrow]

✰ * º ❛   buzzfeed unsolved sentence starters  ( pt. five )   ❜ || accepting

‘  no, that’s dumb. it’s not supernatural, it’s natural.  ’ -- @avaloniamagus

Yona frowned and then tried to keep her face very, very still. She'd been around four guys ... well dragons really ... that liked to pretend that there was really nothing to see here. Nothing going on. Don't pay attention to Giha's giant hand. After a moment of simply staring up at Merlin, her face blank, Yona broke out into a smile.

"If you say so!"

Sometimes it was just better to go along with it.

[wikiuntamed]

On this day in Wikipedia: Saturday, 21st October

Welcome, Bienvenue, Willkommen, Bienvenida 🤗 What does @Wikipedia say about 21st October through the years 🏛️📜🗓️?

21st October 2021 🗓️ : Event - Rust shooting incident A shooting occurs on the set of the film Rust, in which actor Alec Baldwin discharged a prop weapon which had been loaded, killing the director of photography, Halyna Hutchins, and injuring director Joel Souza. "On October 21, 2021, at the Bonanza Creek Ranch in Bonanza City, New Mexico, cinematographer Halyna Hutchins was fatally shot and director Joel Souza was injured on the set of the film Rust when a live round was discharged from a revolver used as a prop by actor Alec Baldwin. The incident was..."

21st October 2015 🗓️ : Death - Marty Ingels Marty Ingels, American actor (b. 1936) "Martin Ingerman (March 9, 1936 – October 21, 2015), known professionally as Marty Ingels, was an American actor, comedian, comedy sketch writer and theatrical agent, who is best known as the co-star of the 1960s television series I'm Dickens, He's Fenster...."

Image by ABC Television

21st October 2013 🗓️ : Death - Óscar Yanes Oscar Yanes, Venezuelan journalist and author (b. 1927) "Óscar Armando Yanes González (25 April 1927–21 October 2013) was a Venezuelan journalist and bestselling author, considered a pioneer in Venezuelan broadcast journalism. He was awarded three times with the National Prize for Journalism...."

Image licensed under CC BY 2.5? by Guillermo Ramos Flamerich

21st October 1973 🗓️ : Event - Fred Dryer Fred Dryer of the Los Angeles Rams becomes the first player in NFL history to score two safeties in the same game. "John Frederick Dryer (born July 6, 1946) is an American actor, radio host, and former professional football player. He was a defensive end in the National Football League (NFL) for 13 years, participating in 176 games starting in 1969 until his retirement in 1981. He recorded 103 career sacks with..."

Image by Howdythere at English Wikipedia

21st October 1923 🗓️ : Birth - Samuel Khachikian Samuel Khachikian, Iranian director, screenwriter, and author (d. 2001) "Samuel Khachikian (Armenian: Սամուէլ Խաչիկեան Armenian pronunciation: [sɑm'vɛl χɑtʃʰik'jɑn]; Persian: ساموئل خاچیکیان; October 21, 1923 – October 22, 2001) was an Iranian film director, screenwriter, author, and film editor of Armenian descent. He was one of the most influential figures of Iranian..."

Image by Unknown. Published in 1964.

21st October 1821 🗓️ : Birth - Sims Reeves Sims Reeves, English tenor and actor (d. 1900) "John Sims Reeves (21 October 1821 – 25 October 1900) was an English operatic, oratorio and ballad tenor vocalist during the mid-Victorian era. Reeves began his singing career in 1838 but continued his vocal studies until 1847. He soon established himself on the opera and concert stage and became..."

Image by Photo by Barraud, Scan by Steven J Plunkett from private copy of book

21st October 🗓️ : Holiday - Christian feast day: Peter Yu Tae-chol "Peter Yu Tae-chol (유대철 베드로) (c. 1826 – October 31, 1839) was one of the 103 canonised Korean Martyrs martyred during the Gihae persecution of 1839, and a son of a government interpreter named Augustine Nyou Tjin-kil, also a martyr. His feast day is October 21, and he is also venerated along with the..."

[molagboop]

@newthinkerer asked: What's in the pink giha?

A lot of ingredients (discounting dyes) can make giha pink! The two pink ones in the image are made with petals from these huge cave flowers called "mabihi", which provide the giha with a floral aroma + flavor and a very slight bitter undertone.

There's also rouge roughroot, which you can think of kind of as the sweet potato of ZDR. Roughroot grows in white, violet, orange, red, and purple varieties, and all of them taste different. The red variety can grant giha a vibrant pink hue. Giha made with rouge roughroot is sweet and earthy.

There are these spike-shelled fruits from the cliffs near Dairon called "kusu" which produce tart giha. The flesh of the fruit where the flavor is derived is translucent: the color comes from soaking the spiny outer rind in a solution of calcium-laden water, and using the byproduct to fashion a powdery dye.

Oops, I invented Chozo food in my brain sandbox.

Some foods are designed to be swallowed whole or torn apart with the talons/beak. They don't have teeth, so they don't really chew their food.

When preparing swallowed meals, chefs must consider texture—this includes, how it feels on the way down.

They can save food in their crop for later. Some things taste better if they come back up 5 hours later.

Parents feed new babies by regurgitating leftovers from their crop. There are supplements and food processing techniques available to make food edible for hatchlings without the use of a crop, but most parents regurgitate.

It is time for giha.

Giha are soft, chewy dumpling-like balls. The dough is made of flour derived from roots that thrive in the marshy, lower recesses of Ghavoran (think rice flour, but ground from roots instead of grains). Pictured above is your bog-standard unflavored giha: faintly sweet if you think really hard about it while it's sitting on your tongue, but the point is for it to feel good in the throat. It's garnished with a little bit of sweetgrass, which you can eat if you'd like, but it's mostly for show. The flour used to make this giha was bleached, giving it that blindingly white tone; unbleached flour produces balls that are a bit more grey. There's no noticeable difference between the flavor of giha made with bleached and unbleached flour; bleaching the flour is an aesthetic choice.

It takes strong hands to prime the dough for giha: it must be worked continuously, or else it'll be too firm. Firm dough has its uses in other culinary applications, but it's not ideal for making giha. The best giha is beaten and kneaded by culinary masters for several hours.

Pictured: soft balls. The blue giha get their color from sweet caterpillars, and the yellow one is made with honey from the stalks of giant carnivorous plants.

Giha tastes pleasant and feels amazing on the way down. Also of note is the squish. It's fun to squeeze a bouncy little dumpling between the two halves of your beak, especially when you're a kid. Beaks are sensory organs, and The Squish is a long-established culinary experience! Raven Beak is enjoying The Squish at the top of this post.

Giha can be bouncy and just a little dusty on the surface, or smooth and lightly rubbery, or it can have a firm, yet reasonably penetrable give, or it can have little savory cubes in it, or...