#gifts just seem so…arbitrary I guess?

[beardedhandstoadshark]

Has there been a moment in your life, where you had to get someone a present... could not decide, so you just draw them a pretty picture?

I did. So did another friend for that same friend and we also both drew the same thing 🙃

[eri-pl]

Silm reread 24A (the long-expected continuation): The Gift

Or: the Fall of Númenor

TW: well, it is Númenor. I will not give more details than the book does.

It is said among the Eldar (because where else :þ) that Men fear and worship the Darkness (which is a word the Eldar use as a synonym for "evil" which is a bit inconceivable but let's move on).

We get a recap od what we know of Men, also in the War of Wrath Morgoth was "ultimately defeated" ok I know you can't make your mind, (both Jirt and Pengolodh probably), I like this better than "he's going to fight Túrin and Fefe in a van".

Men in the East are in a bad situation, the Valar abandoned them for a time (until they send the Blue Wizards I guess) because they obeyed bad people. Generally the East is wild and bad and … :/

OK, so now we are told Manwë imprisoned Morgoth and the language strongly suggests "but he will eventually break out and do Ragnarok stuff". Huh. I did say something about not being able to make your mind, right?

Now there's the weird part about "the will of Morgoth" which sounds like a somewhat separate entity?… I get the general idea, it's hard to have him booted out and explain why there's still evil in the world. Still it all feels odd.

OK, quote (emphasis mine):

But Manwe put forth Morgoth and shut him beyond the World in the Void that is without; and he cannot himself return again into the World, present and visible, while the Lords of the West are still enthroned. Yet the seeds that he had planted still grew and sprouted, bearing evil fruit, if any would tend them. For his will remained and guided his servants[…]

Huh. Any thoughts?

Eonwë personally taught the leaders of the Edain. What did he teach them? I don't know. We are not told. But it suggests that Eonwë may have better social skills with Men than I have assumed.

It was Ossë who raised the island of Númenor (at least he does something nice and non-violent ;) ) + the Valar upgraded it and only then did the Númenoreans sail. It is almost as the history of Arda in miniature. Just make it better (Morgoth is not there, Men live longer etc), what could possibly go wrong with this?

[Yes, I read the situation as "the Valar are trying to jump higher than their heads here".]

The Númenoreans don't get sick. I forgot that part. Well, they don't until they get under the Shadow. They are taller than normal people and their eyes shine like stars. TLDR: they're like offbrand Elves and Tolkien likes shining eyes.

And they don't have many children. Why? It makes sense for Elves, but why the Númenoreans, even early?

No temples, only the open mountain. OK. and we get the mention of the graves of kings at the mountain's base even now. Does it mean that even the first kings had big decorative graves?

It was the Valar who chose Elros to be the king. I wonder why, but "he could be an Elf but preferred to be a Man" seems like a --- yes, this is a good reason.

We get a recap of the peredhil. Again.

The Númenoreans learned Quenya during the alliance with Elves, so again: they speak Vanyarin Quenya, or maybe non-Exilic Noldorin Quenya. So either they do read "ty" as "ch" or they read the "th" as "s". I don't remember which one it was. Anyway later they spoke a lot with the Elves so they probably settled with some kind of pronounciation based on whom they spoke with the most.

Nobody later reached the sailing awesomeness of the Númenoreans. The book is written in, what, late TA? Early FA? Makes sense that they sail less.

We get an explanation of why the ban. It makes sense, but also I get that it seems very arbitrary (especially with Númenor existing).

Also, a quote:

For in those days Valinor still remained in the world visible, and there Ilúvatar permitted the Valar to maintain upon Earth an abiding place, a memorial of that which might have been if Morgoth had not cast his shadow on the world.

OK, maybe it's just me adding to my little box of arguments, but this sounds to me as "Ilúvatar permitted them because they asked intensly but it wasn't a great idea". Also, a memorial. Of what might have been. This does not sound good. This sounds like the vibe of the Elven Rings.

Also, again we have mixed messages about whether Valinor was moved to the orbit or into the unseen world (made purely spiritual somehow)?

Sigh. the Númenoreans civilize the people of ME because they need it. *sigh* at least they're goodwilled about it.

Aaaaand, who could guess, with time they grow more and more focused on the bright thing that is nearby (Valinor). Just like it was with the Silmarils and almost everyone who saw them.

Also, they don't like that they die, and they murmur. And they are upset that the Elves don't die, even the ones who disobeyed the Valar and it's so unfair, the Noldor went to ME and did all kinds of bs and still they don't die and we never even get— I mean, and we die. How unfair.

Seriously, almost everyone in this book is so predictably stupid and the worst part is that knowing that all does not make us less stupid. anywa, let's continue with the reread:

"Aren't we the greatest?" Huh. :/

Manwë is sad. Relateable. I want to hug him, and it's not even from a fic. My guy [affectionate], my poor birb.

He sends emissaries to the king. Oh, he's learning from his mistakes around Feanor! <3 You'll eventually learn how to deal with the Children. <3

The Earendil argument (and as was discussed, no tuor arguement, at least not quoted in the book). And a recap of how Men and Elves work. <3 some vague Athrabeth-ish tones. <3

Thirteenth king and we're already deep in trouble. :(

OK, now we get the big graves. And colonialism. The good guys visit Gil-galad and figth Sauron together. The bad guys colonize the South.

We get a recap of Sauron. Who wants to be an overking and worshipped by Men and hates the Númenor for pretty much everything including "their ancestors fought against Melkor and me in the War". And he is afraid of them.

More kings. Some of you remember their names… 23rd king hates the Faithful the most… huh, he is not the one to burn them so I would argue with the narration here. The Elves from Tol Eressea still visit, but in secret. This has a lot of fic potential. (Also, don't tell me that nobody ever at any point of Númenorean history tried to sneak into an Elven ship and go to Aman with them. not at this point, probably. But earlier you could have someone who both doesn't like the Ban, and has contact with the Elves)

Then the Elves stop visiting, because the Valar get angry. i'm not sure why now, what exactly was the tipping point.

A recap of Andúnie, the, ugh, situation of Inzilbêth, we get a good older brother and bad younger brother— wait, maybe the Men have this scheme inverted in general? I'll need to investigate this.

Tar-Palantir. Whose remorse is too late because the Valar are already angry— excuse me, Pengolodh, my guy, what? I'd get it if you told me that the problem is that the whole nation has already been gone so far and the king could not convince them, but I really don't like what you said about the Valar here. But yes, ok, it;s probably because the nation is still full of bs. Pengolodh. Please, be so kind and spare us your opinions. Especially on questions like forgiveness. go handle your exilic trauma somewhere else. I can't find a quote for this, sadly.

So, Tar-Palantir gets a healthy dose of the typical Silm "sad about my brother" especailly that he (the brother) dies early. Aaand we get Pharazôn. Yay… :/ People love him, because he's a great general and gives out riches.

The 25th king. As I have already speculated in one post, the number 5 is not a good number.

Sauron provokes him to war. When the Númenorean fleet arrives, everyone is so scared that they run away and the army marches through an empty land, which gives me echoes of Earendil, but this makes no sense, I think tolkien just likes the image of someone (or an army) walking through a deserted land/city. I agree, it has a lot of atmosphere. they march for seven days, with trumpets, and in red and in gold.

So Sauron does his thing, but Ar-Pharazôn is not a fool—well, not this kind of fool—and doesn't trust him. which plays very well into Sauron's ringed hand.

Sauron sees the capital of Númenor and again we have someone reacting to a beuiful city with envy and hatered. (First: Melkor to Valinor in general; second: Maeglin to Gondolin; third: here.)

He tells the king a lot of secrets, and "he knew many of the things not yet revealed to Men". Like… what things? I wonder. Many of the Elf-Friends get confused and scared and switch sides. I wish I knew why exactly. It is before the violence started.

Something something Darkness and Sauron's peak bs.

Amandil and Pharazôn have been friends in their youth (yes, Pharazon liked him too!) → Fic. Potential. So much fic potential. Amandil gets higher on my "I like him because he has a lot of things to be sad about" list. So, Amandil—

We've had many, many instances of characters cursing things/characters/themselves/whatever. Now we get the only instance in the Silm of an Incarnate blessing something. (Amandil blesses the seeds of the White Tree.) which is very interesting.

OK, warning: it gets dark from here.

Sauron. The language. I know the style of description of the thing is not Sauron's fault… I suppose the style is, again, illustrative of his general vibe (which is a very smart writing btw), so, ugh. Seriously, Professor, you never give the dimensions, so we all know why you gave the dimensions here, and … yes I do get your stylistic choices, they make me want to punch him which i assume is exactly what you were aiming at.

I'm sorry, I should probably elaborate more.

So, to elaborate more: the temple which sauron built is described in a language that is vaguely reminescent of the Temple of Salomon (ie giving the exact measurements, and yes, this is very noticeable because tolkien is always very poetic, about sizes too) and the juxtaposition makes me feel offended, and this helps, because this is how we should feel at this point in the book. So, this is brilliant.

They didn't burn only the Faithful, I would assume also some criminals and maybe random people. Also, there were some anti-king conspirations, the book almost says that.

People die more, everything is awful, and of course the people of Númenor are "it's fine" (as you do). In addition to Sauron's main temple of Melkor, people have private temples. Where they burn people stolen from ME.

madness and sickness availed them; and yet so they were afraid to die and go out into the dark, the realm of the lord that they had taken; and they cursed themselves in their agony.

I really wish we had an idea how this came to the chronicler. anyway, an Elf repeating things he hard from some escaped Númenoreans about what their friends/lords/whomever were thinking. And still it sounds very much like what they would be thinking.

No, wait, there could be a better source. Imagine a noble and depraved lady (or nobleman) who left Númenor for the colonies, thinking it'd be just for a short time, and in the meantime— the whole thing happenned. Great fic potential for survivor's guilt leading to remorse and later this person as an old woman telling this stuff to an Elvish chronicler, or maybe not even so old, maybe telling the story in the times of the Last Alliance and fighting against Sauron to do at least that, and I'm not a fan of the "redemption equals death" trope, so living into old age, but without a leg or something. Maybe ending up in rivendell. that would be fitting. The guilt of it all. And yet you chose to live and to do what you can.

Anyway back to the story. Amandil. Nobody even speculates about what happenned to him. (Well, I do, but)

The Faithful prepare to sail and the seven Seeing Stones (all but one of them) given by the Eldar— by whom? I hope it was Nerdanel. Or someone wlse who actually had the right to give them away. Yes, I will assume it was Nerdanel.

Lightning strikes kill people on random hills… I would prefer to assume it's either Sauron or gossip. especially that just a bit later we learn that Sauron is immune to those lightnings. So yes, i think some elements of the "wrath of the Valar" is just Sauron trying to make people even more desperate.

I can't imagine Manwë killing people just like that, even in this context. Especially with how later he doesn't do anything to Pharazôn's army until given a very explicit leave to do so.

Logically, it is sauron killing those people.

The armada… they sail for 39 days (where did I find that information?) which I'm sure means something, but what. 40-1? 3*13? Both?

40 is a number of transformation, so 39 would be a failed or false transformation maybe?

Also, black and gold coloring. Beautiful but in the Silm, vaguely evil-coded.

Just as they break the ban(? but I think it is this moment) they get a strong wind. I guess it's Manwë saying "ok, if we have to, let's make it quick".

They pass Eressea, I think mostly ignoring it? Pharazôn sees Taniquetil and gets one good idea (to cancel his idiotic thing), but nope, he's too proud. Seriously. That's… "my guy" is not enough of a wording.

The Eldar have escaped from Tition… this makes me smile a little, because assuming the ex-exiles did move back to tirion, they do deserve a little fright. For Alqualonde. I know I know. But. It's not like any harm happenned to them. they were just terrified. Of an army of Men. Which is encamped around their island.

So yea. The world is round now. And again it sounds like Aman is moved to the unseen world. Huh. Mixed canon.

Oh, here is the 39. 39 days from the fleet leaving Númenor to the destruction. Including also a volcano and earthquake.

And speaking of numbers, 9 ships of Elendil, Isildur and Anárion.

Also, all the sea shorelines are changed.

So, back to Sauron. Idiot. He is terrified by what happenned, because he expected Pharazôn and everyone to die, but not something like this. So, he is sitting on his black (of course) throne and laughing. What had I said about Sauron being somewhere high up and laughing? So he laughs three times and just as he does the third time his throne falls down into the watery abbyss. "Not noticing a divine tsunami" level: pro. I am not surprised. I mean, I read the book before, so of course I am nor surprised, but anyway, that is nor surprising.

Loses his beauty. Just. The amount of mercy. "I convinced Men to sacrifice other Men to Morgoth, and put the Valar into a trolley dilemma and all I got was this ugly face so that I maybe finally learn" — he needs a t-shirt with this. I need to draw him in a frigging t-shirt.

I want to punch him in the face again.

Yes, i know, i know. It's not my fault he gets more infuriating descriptions.

Oh and the peak of Meneltarma is maybe an island, and people want to find it and have visions of Númenor's past glory… *sigh* Call me old and grumpy but focusing on that doesn't seem like— ok oh. they don't have anything better to focus. This is also true. Huh. I just realized that this makes the whole "focusing on unreachable shadows" things so much more tragic. anyway…

Oh, they do not find it. Good for them. I am sorry, I know it's sad, but it is good for them.

The Dúnedain seeking this island is peak amdir. (This is neither a compliment nor a accusation, or maybe both).

But explaining this would need a long tangent of "amdir" meaning etymologically "looking up" and of the gneral idea of looking in the wrong place. I know I shouldn't be quoting motivational posters when talking Tolkien, because they are much less profound but generally "Stop Looking for Happiness in the Same Place You Lost It"

So anyway, The Land of the star is lost, and the Straight Road is no more and Tolkien is sad and pretty much everyone is sad and we are growing up.

Still, there is a shortcut for Elves who want to use it.

Huh. this reread felt more profound than the others. Not so many facts I've been missing, but the vibe. I think I understood some vibes I didn't understand before. But this may be just the autumn.

[angelthemanspanker]

I can't believe of all the magic gimmick episodes to make a mess of that BTVS managed to fuck up a time loop. A Buffy time loop episode should be the stuff of legend up there with The No Talky One and The Singy One but no. Life Serial time loop I'm sorry but you're nothing to me. Buffyverse magic is always vaguely defined and the rules change by the episode but the time loop spell Jonathan put on Buffy is so underexplained and overpowered that it severely takes me out of the scene

No one else in the shop but Buffy is aware that they're looping or time passing so is the spell just sending Buffy back in time and no one else? But then how can the Trio watch what's going on with the Magic Box cameras in real time with Buffy/the audience. Are they also looping? Does Jonathan's spell reset time for literally everyone except the three of them and Buffy? Because that means Jonathan, by means of magic bone, is repeatedly sending the entire world back a few minutes, keeping the memories of him, the other casters, and the target intact, until a completely arbitrary task decided by Jonathan is accomplished by Buffy.

Does that mean the awkward customer was part of the spell? Because satisfying an annoying customer was the task Jonathan set out for Buffy, did he just know that lady would be difficult? Did they just wait until a difficult customer showed up and bother Buffy to start the loop? What if none did? Is she a physical illusion or a magic homunculus being difficult under Jonathan's direction? Is she a real person playing out his script under mind control? Because unless it's the contrived coincidence option that's a lot of continuous magic to keep up while also maintaining the time loop, all with what seemed like a damn easy spell.

Why don't we know that spell? Casters' and target's memories unaffected, why didn't the gang cast it on Buffy before The Gift and make the loop breaking condition being defeating Glory without any Scoobies dying? We fail, oh well, try again. We know it doesn't need to be fixed on a room bc it covered the Magic Box and the Nerdmobile (even though trying to leave the shop just reset the loop for Buffy bc this spell just does fucking everything I guess). We know any damage done gets reset bc Buffy broke Giles' glasses and the doorbell and they were fine after a loop so no worries about racking up injuries or wasting the Dagon Sphere. And sure if Jonathan can do it, he of the only reasonably impressive abilities, then experienced Giles or Tara or especially Willow should have no problem whatsoever. And all this for one scene.

Life Serial time loop spell you are my enemy.

[literary-illuminati]

Book Review 32 – Weavers, Scribes and Kings: A New History of the Ancient Near East by Amanda Podany

This was my second real (published by a university press, has ~100 pages of citations and bibliography at the back) history book I’ve read this year. Which I think probably explains why it took me about as long to read as the other 7 books this month put together. Which is the opposite of a complaint, just to be absolutely clear. I’ve kind of missed chewing through a history book that would double as a decent self-defence aid in a pinch.

The title explains the book well enough – this is a broad survey history of the ancient near east. Specifically, it’s a history of civilizations that recorded their records and correspondences and stories in cuneiform on clay tablets. So the narrative begins with Uruk in Sumeria, follows it through the spread of city-states throughout Mesopotamia, expands its view to include Syria, the Levant and regions of Anatolia (and to a much lesser extent Egypt) and the western Iranian plateau in the late bronze age, and keeps that frame through the iron age until reaching the Achaemenid conquests and the decline of cuneiform in favour of writing in Aramaic on paper or parchment.

Part of that is just arbitrary because you need to pick some outer borders of what your book is about, but it’s also a fact that writing everything down on (often baked, either purposefully or because they got caught in a fire) clay tablets was a truly incredible gift to future historians. Paper and parchment and cloths decays away over the course of a historical eyeblink, whereas we still have legal contracts and bureaucratic records from literally four thousand years ago that were recorded on fired clay. Combined with some incredible archaeological luck, and we can see stretches of late bronze age history in higher definition than very nearly anything until, like, the Early Modern Period.

The necessary condition of that is obviously that these cuneiform-writing civilizations actually wrote enough down for written records to really let us understand their societies. Which did very over time, and is definitely overwhelmingly biased towards the great institutions and upper classes, but actually does seem to have been true! Podany all but dedicated the book Mesopotamia’s scribal class, and they got everywhere. And the change over time in just what’s written about - the spread of written records and letters from temples and palaces to the private homes, the spread in literacy from an arcane art only trained scribes would understand to something every halfway prominent merchant would be expected to grasp the basics of for record-keeping – is illuminating enough about how these societies evolved on its own.

Aside from all the waxing poetic about clay tablets, the book does try quite hard to be an approachable historical survey. To that end, basically every chapter is split into a few different sections, each pocket biographies of individuals (or, occasionally, pieces of architecture) that we have enough visibility of to make them a useful entry point to illustrating some broader aspect or society or important process they lived through. The vast majority of them aren’t great kings or conquerors, either – scribes, merchants, weavers, farmers, priestesses, and even the occasional slave get pride of place. On balance, the book tries to be a social history, getting across how people actually lived (or Podany’s best guess of it, though she’s quite explicit about what the actual evidence we have for every given biography is and when she’s speculating) is favoured over the exact sequence of battles and kings.

I’ve mentioned it before, but prior to reading this my only real familiarity with the ancient Near East (and specifically with the development of pristine states in Mesopotamia) was from Scott’s Against the Grain. Which adds a slight sense of whiplash to the entire first third or so of this book, honestly; as opposed to Scott, Podany actually seems sympathetic to the position that civilization was a good idea. Part of that is just that she takes the actual emergence of the first city-states as a given (instead of something approaching original sin), but the book very clearly portrays the growth of a literary culture, monumental architecture, specialized labour, grand and impressive rituals and festivals, institutionalized long-distance trade, and so on as interesting and impressive things worth studying and appreciating. It’s a book about a project of state-based urban-agrarian civilization, as told through its archaeological remnants and literary corpus, and as a whole it portrays that project as admirable and sympathetic. The book doesn’t brush over slavery or warfare, but they’re not especially focused on, either. Famine and plague actually are pretty much brushed over or at least portrayed as irregular calamities. A lot of the book’s wordcount is spent sketching out lives that seem at least slightly familiar to a modern reader, and making the Mesopotamian world seem like a place you could live a happy life in. Quite a contrast to Scott’s constellation of slave societies held together by brute force and exemplary terror, forever raiding the hinterland to abduct new workers to make up the losses from constant disease outbreaks and always on the verge of collapse.

Well, that’s all only mostly true. Podany’s sympathies for pristine states and bronze age empires does not extend to the iron-age Assyrian Empire. Her disdain for their whole imperial project is pretty clear through those chapters, and from her telling they (especially during what’s called the Neo-Assyrian Empire) were responsible for a lot of the brutal innovations that are now such core parts of imperialism. The mass deportation of conquered populations to settle and work other provinces, using exemplary terror to cow subjects, and royal legitimacy established nearly entirely through glorious victories in warfare and exulting in the same. (Along with less objectionable but still important practices like appointing regional governors from the centre.)

The book makes a real point of keeping a balance between men and women in who it focuses on. This is, I get the feeling, kind of just a matter of wanting to show off that we have a historical record that actually includes women in it as more than accessories and footnotes to men for this period (unlike, say, Classical Athens), But Podany’s clearly made a secondary goal of the book to try and push back on the whole image of a primordial and unchanging ultra-patriarchal order across all of history. So there’s a lot of attention paid to how the role of women in public life changed over time, and the sort of political and economic power elite women could wield. Which was actually quite a bit, as it turned out! Obviously nowhere in the ancient world was anything like a feminist utopia (and as a general trend, seems to have grown more patriarchal over time), but compared to a lot of periods I know more about, the available space for women in public life is quite a bit larger; on the upper extreme, queens and priestesses managed and controlled massive estates in their own right, and on the lower we’ve got plenty of bureaucratic records showing women in various prestigious or managerial roles. Always paid significantly less than men doing the same of course, but still a far sight from being totally cloistered or official ideologies saying women are soulless or incapable of rational thought!

Speaking of priestesses – Podany goes into great detail trying to describe Mesopotamian religion and the place religion had in the ancient near east. Which again changes over time – in the early dynastic period the great temples seem to have been the core organizing institutions of economic and social life, but two thousand years latter they were still rich and important, but relatively speaking much less central – but is basically always incredibly important. The endowment of high priestesses and the creation of some public work then given over as the property of an important gods were common themes of year names across the region’s kingdoms, and by all accounts pretty key legitimizing activities. The idea that the gods would sanctify oaths and punish anyone who broke them was likewise a pretty core part of Mesopotamian systems of justice. The book’s a bit vague on how the actual theology and practice of religion over time, but there’s plenty of lovely, evocative descriptions of rituals and festivals, and of the architecture of temples and design of the statue-avatars that were considered to be literal bodies of the divine.

The book’s also very interested in forms of government – both day to day systems of contracts and justice and land allocation, and the high politics of royal courts and governance. Though there’s unsurprisingly quite a bit more available on the latter than the former. Still, it’s pretty fascinating to the degree that the whole ‘absolute tyrant bronze age god-king’ was...well, not not a thing, but very much an occasional aberration. The growth of centralized royal authority was a real trend over a lot of the period, but especially in the beginning arrangements that seem pretty close to what we’d call a constitutional monarchy, with power shared with councils of notables, really do seem to have predominated. Special shouout to Ashur, which before it became a militaristic empire in the late Bronze Age was actually a prosperous trading city where the king was in large part a ritual/religious figure and the balance of executive power seems to have been held by an official who was elected by the city’s merchant class for annual terms.

I’ve done a poor job getting it across in this review, but the book does an amazing job really confronting you with the sheer depth of history – bronze age kingdoms and city-states were the dominant political institutions of the near-east for millennia. The period covered by the book is literally nearly as long as the period between the end of the book and the present. It’s enough to give you a sense of vertigo.

Anyway, absolutely incredible book, that I’m very happy to have read. Now I need to go find a decent one on Achaemenid Persia.

[fairlyfriendlylurker]

Why Pretty Privilege Sucks Ass

I've always understood the beckoning of plastic surgery. Being pretty is 100% a blessing, whether the person realizes it or not, but it's an arbitrary gift. And it's not fair that only a few get to enjoy it. Most people aren't outright treated with disdain or affection on the basis of their looks but there's always that subconscious factor. Not to mention plenty of us DO just straight-up shit on unattractive people simply for being unattractive. I've always hated it when people used the word ugly as an insult. You're basically condemning someone for existing. I can't believe society categorizes people as having varying value or worth just because they were born a certain way that they can't help. Sometimes I feel ashamed to just EXIST the way I do among prettier people. Being insecure and feeling plain and unattractive is definitely a big part of the reason I'm so trapped in this shell, although I don't think I realized it before. What makes me feel the most helpless about it all is that these labels of worthiness/unworthiness are given subconsciously. People don't even realize it's going on but it is. It's an inherent prejudice, engrained in us, and I don't think we're ever going to find a way to get rid of it. Maybe it's because of this that I sometimes deliberately go out of my way to be nicer to less attractive people and generally wary of the more attractive ones. Most of the time, though, I keep this to myself. Inwardly loathing the attractiveness of girls on the internet like a jealous bitter old hag (which I guess I kinda am) is one thing, but I would never outright treat them differently because that would essentially be doing the same thing I have been complaining about this whole time; treating people differently based on how they were born. But mark my words, if I had a villain origin story, my motive would be something along these lines. No amount of inspiring and encouraging body positivity influencers or wholesome-seeming messages is gonna make me believe I'm pretty, because I'm not. They all parrot the same thing, that "everyone is beautiful" but that's a load of bullshit because OBVIOUSLY not everyone is physically good-looking. I wish people would just be honest, because if they were, we wouldn't all have false hopes which lingered only to be dashed. Even understanding that being pretty isn't an accomplishment doesn't make me feel better. The only thing that WOULD make me feel better is realizing I'm pretty, which is not going to happen unless I have some sort of massive glow up in the future. And, yeah. That's pretty much the gist of it, sorry for making you endure this- I may have made it deeper and more dramatic than necessary- but I think this stuff will fare better out there than inside me. If you think you aren't pretty- regardless of whether you actually are or not- I'm with you. I hope someday we can figure something out and feel at peace about all this for once.

[imustbenuts]

Grima and Vash are in one locked room, Knives and Chrom in another. They have to work together with the person in the room to escape, and one killing the other means they're trapped forever.

How much of a bloodbath is it anyway in the one room and who's getting cake when they get out for actually getting out at all?

(I just like seeing you think on characters in Situations.)

oh hoh this is an interesting ask. so im guessing the condition to escape the room is arbitrary and the root issue is how they will actually get together to cooperate. ok. i think i understand.

ROOM A) GRIMA & VASH

hm.

grima in my head is more of a flighty genocidal baby who attacks first and talks later. vash seems like a flighty love and peace adult who talks first and wants to attack never. grima also loves monologues. so vash will counter with 'no! killing bad!'

i think the two of them will have a tom and jerry moment where vash constantly avoids grima's attacks and succeeds even if its a smelly breath of death. through the constant bickering they both get a good grasp of each others' character.

vash thinks grima is similar to his brother, knives, but is a lot more naive and baby about it all. vash is also not the type to debate if someones ideology is wrong, so this quirk gets through to grima and they eventually realizes that though they dont agree with each other, they understand and still think the other is wrong in the conclusion.

grima thinks the world/humanity should end bc humans are always doomed to war and misunderstandings, vash thinks the world should continue on anyway bc its always changing and improving and the periods of peace are worth something. immovable object vs unstoppable force.

but bc vash isnt human or naga grima just decides they want nothing to do with vash. and bc of the impasse they decide to cooperate and get out despite constantly disagreeing with each other.

i think grima will probably come around to respecting vash to a degree and maybe hang back on their genocidal plan bc deep down grima has seen that vash has a point from prev experiences.

ROOM B) KNIVES & CHROM

.......

they are comparing their dicks weapons.

knives (stampede ver) is arguing his is bigger bc the knives can chain each other and be freely manipulated. chrom is arguing, no, that is not a weapon technically, and that his falchion is bigger. or something.

knives also likes to monologue. chrom likes to do his own variation of heroic monologues.

anyway. knives also hates the shit out of chrom bc chrom is human and the situation descends into a bloody fight. chrom is able to stand his own somewhat and they argue about other stuff.

at some point chrom yells about his siblings and tries to convince knives to work together bc he wants to get back to his family, and knives realizes he also needs to get back to his twin brother to further abuse him. ofc bc chrom is dense he interprets whatever knives says in a good light so the real nature of knives and vash's relationship doesnt really get through.

but bc chrom is too goody he somehow talks about his healthy good sibling relationships and that causes knives to pause and reflect just a little.

eventually they get out with slightly more cuts on chrom's side, and knives lets the guy walk bc he figures he could always kill humanity at any given time and really doesnt care, but also that maybe chrom should really go show his love for his remaining little sister.

knives later might go buy/steal something as a gift for vash as a result of this encounter, stalk him down and then deliver it after tormenting him again by destroying/killing the humans around vash. then he leaves to further plot the genocide of all humans for his ideal paradise.

unfortunately all this does is further freak vash out and makes him more afraid of knives.

Cake goes to team Vash and Grima

[frostyreturns]

Frosty Ruins "Here Comes Peter Cottontail 1971"

Just like with Christmas and with anything Christian there is going to be a culture of trying to shift focus away from Christ and onto some goofy nonsense that has nothing to do with it. For the celebration of Christs death and resurrection we have…the easter bunny, painted eggs and chocolate. And now this year we also have the government tranny holiday trying to steal focus.

Now with Santa and all that I understand it and am ok with it more because it still ties in with the theme. Jesus was brought gifts so we bring each other gifts…santa is based on a saint who brought the poor/orphaned presents and the whole idea of giving is consistent with Christian values…it makes more sense. With Easter it's just a whole bunch of totally unrelated nonsense. Rabbits have nothing to do with Christ or the celebration, painting and hunting for eggs also have nothing to do with anything, even the name Easter has nothing to do with Christ. However It's a bunch of nonsense that if people choose to do it as part of their celebration of course there's nothing wrong with that. I've said before I'm totally ok with coopting other celebrations and integrating with other things…Easter is more of a celebration of spring, and even spring can be reflected in the resurrection story. So I personally get nothing from the easter decor and the non-Christian easter traditions but I don't begrudge anyone who does. Even as a kid I wasn't really into the aesthetics of easter…I liked that we got chocolate but that was it.

What I do like however is a good Rankin Bass holiday special, so in this instance I was willing to give it a chance. Though the rudderless nature of the story has the characters all seeming ridiculous. I'm not sure why the host is a leprechaun man, or why there's a caterpillar that's also a frenchman, or why one of the charactes is a hat…like just a hat. I mean is it possible to be more removed from the meaning of the holiday than jewish people writing a song for a french wormguy to sing to a rabbit about painting american flag eggs for july 1st? Almost sounds intentionally far removed doesn't it? The only thing that would make it more obvious of a subversion attempt was if it had witches in it or something…oh wait it does.

The premise for the secular easter story is so thin this story has to contrive a time travel scenario and then borrow and interpose the facets of easter into all the other mainstream holidays. The irony that the villain at one point tells Santa (who yes is also in this) to stick to his own holiday is palpable. I wasn't a fan of the throwing all the holidays in a blender thing and never have.

The plot is too goofy and not even in a magical cartoon kind of way…it's almost like a reflection of politics, they are trying to decide who the new easter bunny should be. One of which is a child hating ass hole who hates easter and wants to ruin it and ruin their home and way of life. So of course they have to follow their constituion and let this guy have a chance even though absolutely nobody thinks they would be a good easter bunny and they cheat to win. Actually it's a perfect metaphor for politics.

But one of the funny parts of the story is that part of the villains scheme to ruin easter is to declare rabbits and chicks will no longer be the symbols of the holiday and instead they would have to make it "spiders and octopuses"…and I'm just here like…ok, that's not any less arbitrary than rabbits and chicks why not?

I do love the stop motion animation style and some of the visual gags are excellent. I'm totally indifferent to the music though. It's not bad, I don't have anything negative to say about it but I also don't particularly like it, so I guess I'll just say it's not for me. I know some of the music was very memorable for kids who grew up with this movie...but mostly it's just the last titular song they remember.

One of the things that most bothers me about this version of the easter bunny is the way they depict the easter bunny as openly approaching children and offering them eggs in person. It kind of ruins the idea of the easter bunny hiding chocolates and stuff, it didn't even get easter egg hunting right…like that's the one solitary interesting thing about the secular easter and they fucked that up. There's no magic or mystery for kids. They just have to… go oh this is a make believe story because on easter I've never seen an acual bunny handing out eggs directly to me so it must be made up. And the way he goes about trying to give them out for other holidays by just making shit up is also annoying and makes the main character less sympathetic.

It was also really weird how they stuffed in a romance thread into the last 10 minutes of the movie with a character they just introduced us to. Overall I'm comfortable saying this was a bad movie with a few small redeeming qualities.

C-

0 Jesuses/10

[pandor-pandorkful]

Oh boy random teenage memory time.

One of the consequences of switching to homeschool, after an excruciatingly stressful first semester of middleschool, was that by the time I was high-school aged I had completely lost touch with teen culture and what all my peers were into.

(I was already an ostracized fat nerd before homeschooling, let's be honest loosing touch with current fads was going to happen anyway, even if I had stuck with public school.)

But my point is that by the time I made friends with my fellow high-school aged homeschoolers, I was very aware that I had no idea what kids my age did for fun anymore. And it made me very anxious.

(I started writing this thinking this was a high-school age memory, but actually I think it might be a college memory. Hrmm.)

So cut to me, about 16 or 17 years old, haven't had a birthday party with friends since about age 13. (I can't recall entirely, but some kid might have thought my last birthday party wasn't cool enough or something? Idk, either something happened that made me want to not have birthday parties with friends or classmates anymore, or it was an odd natural drop-off... I think at some point i just started to find them overwhelming!)

It's mid-March, around my birthday. Either a homeschool group friend or freshman college friend approaches me and tells me they've got me a birthday present! But they're not going to give it to me unless I have a birthday party.

Cue inner panic. I had no idea what kind of birthday parties people my age had. They egg me on, I waffle...

Ultimately, I didn't throw a party! The anxiety about it was too intense and I moved on with my life!

But I guess part of me still wonders what the heck that present woulda been. Now that I'm in my late 30s, it seems absolutely crazy to try strong-arming somebody into throwing themselves a birthday party--let alone using a gift as leverage!

Just, like, if you have a gift for a friend, don't wait for an excuse. Just give it to them. Surprise gifts are way more meaningful than arbitrary holiday or birthday presents.

[thewapolls]

since the last one being a repeat was a bit of a copout, have another poll today...

BLAKOU & SHANZEN I have no trivia on these guys. They appear to be totally original and just kinda vaguely toku-hero-esque. They do seem to share Kamen Rider Black and his nemesis, ShadowMoon's color schemes, but that's a bit of a long shot to really call a reference. Ironically they actually sorta resemble the Kamen Rider G4 suit from the Kamen Rider Agito movie, but that came out a few years after WA2. In any event the name BURAKKAU[ブラッカウ] SEO is dominated by a burger place called BLACKOWS[ブラッカウズ]. And while SHANZEN[シャンゼン] doesn't have any direct hits, it does pull up the old henshin hero CHANGERION[シャンゼリオン] so it's maybe possible the name was meant to be CHANGIN(G)?

AMDUSCIAS aka AMDUKIAS brings us back to the Ars Goetia. You know the drill with this. Random arbitrary hierarchical titles and domains, but not really much in the ways of actual "lore". He's draw as a man with a unicorn head, but I like the WA monster's nky lance and horse armor.

SLEIPNIR, Norse myth, Odin's 8 legged steed, unmatched in speed, gifted to Odin and birthed by Loki in the form of a mare when he seduced Svaðilfari, the unmatched stallion of the architect who build the walls of Asgard.

AL GEBAR seems to be accurately taken from ALGEBAR, the star β Orionis, also known as Rigel. Itself taken from the name AL-JABBAR[الجبار]. (Dueto its place in astronomy it's also associated with mythic warriors represented in constellations like Orion and Aurvandil.)

RIESENGE seems like it's meant to be related to the German RIESE or RIESEN meaning "Giant" but I'll be honest I don't know enough German to know how that -GE works as a declension or inflection or conjugation or whatever... Let's just say it means "GIANT" and leave it at that... >__> OH but I guess that sort of makes it an informal relative of the GIGANTES and GIANT MAXIMUM enemies.

[lunarscaled]

" Uh . . . Devil said birthdays celebrations are pointless, so, he didn't get you anything. Other than the gift of not killing you, I guess. I'm not good with birthday gifts. So, I found a vending machine, & got you these, um . . . Planet X tiny aliens. One looks like he's doing karate, another lifting weights. & . . . I really can't tell what this one's doing. Anyway, happy birthday. "

HAPPY BIRTHDAY LYRIC

"It's true: birthdays are somewhat arbitrary celebrations for beings with shorter lifespans. Imagine how many birthdays a dragon or fae will have in its lifetime compared to a human."

-> They're certain someone would say you're covering for him again with that statement, how easily it rolls from their mouth like a matter of fact to assuage him again in their continual conflicting ideologies, but it was true wasn't it? Even if it wasn't something people wanted to think about. You didn't need to celebrate every rotation you've lived if your life expectancy was 500 years, or even longer. DJ, who existed far outside any kind of acceptable standards for humans ( and most civilized creatures, in Lyric's opinion ) would say that, because for him it was true. It doesn't upset them to hear it.

-> They raise a single amused eyebrow and let Jin take his time explaining himself before extending an open palm for him to place the tiny aliens in. At least he was forthright about it: they're nothing more than cheap little pieces of predominantly green translucent plastic with poorly painted expressions on them, doing various aerobic tasks for a purpose Lyric couldn't fathom. And thought it is nothing more than that, four or five of them fitted carefully into their palm by his thick fingertips from his pocket, Lyric can't help but shield their amused smile behind their free hand to cut into their quiet laughing. Jin was an honest man---he did his best to show his care for others where he could, how he could. Lyric related to it well; they often struggled to pick gifts for any reason. It seemed much easier to just ask someone, or bring them along and let them pick. ( but some people complained about the format of that. something about surprises and knowing someone well and so forth ) Lyric closes their fingers around the tiny pile of aliens and puts them in their jacket pocket.

"I like them. Thank you.

---do you want to share some cake with me? I swear everyone I know gave me a cake, so I've got, like, eight of them... It's no issue to share. At this point, if I don't share I won't finish them."

[the-hydrangea-witch]

i realized i havent done super detailed introductions for celestes story characters

(just so its clear why im adding eye colors along with their magic, theres a Minor correlation between eye color, symbol, and magic color but its mostly arbitrary, i just like colors)

Claire (AKA Celeste (last name undecided)), the Star Witch: the MC. she inherited all of my insecurities and mental health issues im so sorry girlie. tragically incapable of performing magic as easily as the rest of the cast. this is mostly because magic is highly personalized and shes afraid of putting such an intimate part of her BeingTM out into the world. Eye color: brown/amber. Magic: A golden orange. It's slow and foggy but hard to stop. It is extremely sticky like boiling sugar, but an arctic kind of cold. id say it suits a symbol associated with the dead cold of space quite nicely :^)

Heather Dean Forester, the Hydrangea Witch: Claire's best friend and basically an adoptive brother at this point, especially after he moved in with her and her mother. Has a weird amount of knowledge about random things. he and claire werent delinquents but they kinda only had each other in high school and were both almost (or entirely) failing together, so needless to say theyre CloseTM. maybe there will be a section where he grows apart from claire, depends on how angsty im feeling i guess :^) Eye color: green. Magic: really translucent sage green, pretty much invisible in the dark. It's round and almost rubbery the way it seems almost elastic and doesn't have any striations or loose strands, other than a few swirly stripes of off-white. It's nowhere near as cold as Claire's, but still would feel like you're in the shade in late autumn. wear a light jacket :^)

Pippa Jane Owen, the Dandelion Witch: i cant explain why but shes one of my favorite characters, just because her existence basically shatters what little confidence Claire had in being a witch at the start. She's the only other character who knew claire and heather before going to the Other World. very sweet, but also kind of a perfectionist (but of course to everyone else it just looks like shes totally effortless unless something unexpected happens). Eye color: Dark brown. Magic: Mostly a bright, light green, with some yellow and yellow-green streaks. It's wispy like how wind is depicted in a lot of cartoons and video games. Feels like a warm breeze. probably would smell like lemongrass if it was scented :^)

Halia Ka Hiwa Kapule, the Corpse Lily Witch: Looks very serious. Often is very serious. except her humor is extremely deadpan so almost no one can tell when shes joking, which she keeps doing because making people uncomfortable with it is amusing to her. The school had a lot of difficulty getting a corpse lily from Earth into the greenhouse because of how rare it is, so she works extremely hard to practice as much as possible so it doesnt go "to waste" (her words, not the words of the school, theyre pretty chill about it). Eye color: debatable. people around her are torn on whether its brown or hazel, so she just says brown because people are exhausting. Magic: deep red, fading into a slightly peachier tone out from the center. It's wavy? many people can form a straight line or a circle with their magic, but Halia's always has slight curves in it. surprisingly chilly, but a still overcast day kind of chilly, not icy or windy. It makes people want to stay indoors with a cup of tea (idk i dont drink tea) :^)

Nova Éliane Jones, the Sun Witch: "She's the center of a cycle of prophecies spanning millennia, not even just one, she's naturally gifted at magic, she's constantly breaking barriers that leave magic elitists fuming, and she's just... her fashion sense is perfect, she's perfect, by all accounts she's literally the main character." -Claire, the actual main character, also part of the same prophecy as Nova. She, Halia, and Pippa are practically the Heathers, except people actually like them. Eye color: light blue (ocular albinism) Magic: pastel blue, almost periwinkle. It practically billows with how big and room-filling it is. It's hot enough that it just might cause burns with long enough exposure, but honestly it comes from the literal sun, it's to be expected. i think people are just jealous that she's the Sun Witch and not them :^)

thats the last of the student cast from Earth, ill do the rest idk when

[disqualia]

I don't want to feel alone in my efforts towards anyone anymore.

I just want someone to go to lengths to do nice things for me because they want to see me smile... like I do for them...

Do you remember when I got you that easel and paints and oil painting starter stuff for valentines? How thoughtful you told me it was?

Do you remember the look on your face when your transformers arrived?

Do you remember how happy you were when I organised a desk to be built to exactly the specifications of next to the bed so you could have your computer in the room and near the window? The day it moved in with your PC and everything? I do haha, it was good..

Remember when I helped you clean and reorganise your space and access your window at your mums place for the first time in like however many years it was? You hadn't seemed so happy with that room... ever tbh aha it was nice.

Do you remember how chuffed you were with your bass guitar? How I asked you what accessories you wanted and everything. How excited you were to play?

Do you remember when I proposed to you? How special you said you felt? You couldn't stop saying it in fact. It was adorable, not going to lie.

I remember them, because even though these things were things I did or acquired for you, they were gifts to me, too, as seeing you so happy all on it own was such a joy for me.

I wish you would have made me feel as special as I know I have made you feel (according to your own words, not assuming) a little more, and gotten cranky at me for trying to be nice or just asking a question or something arbitrary/genuinely inoffensive a little less...

And you've told me of lovely things you've done for others too, and I've seen some of them! So I don't think you're incapable of doing lovely things... and I haven't completely forgotten you have done some things here and there for me, too..

But I hate that I still feel mostly forgotten in this area, and just wish you'd even just surprise me with a picnic now and again, much less an actual grand gesture, that.. well, that I only expect to be seeing in my wildest dreams... I wish aha.. (but hey, please! Prove me wrong! This IS an invitation)

And it hurts that I always have to spell it out to you, too. But I guess I need things spelled out a lot, too, so, fair's fair there I suppose..

Maybe we should both cut each-other some slack in that regard, then.. hm..

Well in the spirit of that; here's some easy tips then:

" P L E A S E

B E

N I C E

T O

M E"

-

"A

G R A N D

G E S T U R E

W O U L D

B E

B A S E D

NGL"

• • •

It's because you keep saying you'll do these things... Little things, average things, and also bigger things, too, and then... you don't...

Take me on dates, take me to a ball, go opshopping in Fremantle with me, go to Kalamunda with me, play my silly games, teach me yours, get blades to blade with me, go to therapy with me, don't yell at me for asking the same question again, because you know I have memory issues, go skating with me more, propose to me PROPERLY like you promised to when I said yes, nearly two years ago, buy Pokémon SoulSilver back for me, not cheat on me, and these are just /some/ things... just a few things you've said you'd do for me... and theeen - not stuck to any of... Instead.

You build me up...

Just to knock me down...

The other day when I opened up to you about feeling unseen in the basic ways of being a sweet partner and stuff and said I want so badly to get what I am told I will receive at the least, but more importantly long term, to be with someone who puts in the same amount of love and energy into the relationship as I do, because it's so much more fun that way for one thing, and it's easier - for both parties too! If they're working together as one partay -

And I deserve that - you said so yourself.

But if I deserve that, are you trying to give that to me right now?

To be that?

Any of that?

Because you already said you were going to prove it to me the other day and you fucked that up pretty bad, so...

You'd have to do something pretty dang amazing for me to think you care like you say you care right now. Because I just can't trust your words.

Action is all you have to offer me at the moment as you just talk shit, all the time, and don't follow through with it; which makes it just that, shit, and I'm sick of eating it out of your hand like it's candy, because... it's shit!! 🙃

So if you want me to believe you care at all, that you "love me" - if you truly do, and if you really want me to know it, be capable of believing it again, you're going to have to go to some kind of effort to show it so me.. as words won't cut it.

Please... show me what you say means anything to YOU at all, so it CAN mean anything to me.

Rock up in the middle of the night and take me on a drive for maccas or something even, just as a start.

Just, do something spontaneous that shows me you're thinking of me and you actually care about me.

Rock up and throw plastic beads or smth at my window and tell me you just wanted to see me so bad you couldn't help yourself and ask me to meet you outside for a cuddle and a kiss....

If you mean it when you say that you love me... please....

.... show me that you love me.

Show me the truth... please, show me what you believe I deserve.

Please make me feel like I truly matter to you..

_________________________________

[styledeficit]

5 December - 10 December weeknotes

Arbitrary stupid goal. I haven’t read it yet, but I did read Laser Writer II and I loved it. Regardless, I didn’t think I was the type for gamification – a year is a long time to wait for 1 point, but here we are. Last week’s week notes, late. 

Monday 5 December

Dark morning. Fell over litter picking and cut a round hole in my shin for the trouble. Felt the sting and the bruise blooming with every step that followed. Mondays in December! Honestly it makes me think I should reverse the order of my weeknotes.

Winter is finally coming though. On the way back from band the night smelled of woodsmoke and frost. 

Tuesday 6 December 

A post on LinkedIn tells me it’s 9 years ago today that I gave a talk at Creative Liverpool: an indie night of talks with Gavin Strange, Sam Meech and Adrian McEwan. It was the first time I’d heard both Gavin and Sam speak, and their talks were unexpected and brilliant. (Adrian’s was of course, as brilliant as ever. And he was kind – I get nervous when I speak.)

Gavin spoke about… everything, I guess. A bit about his work and a lot about the projects he does for fun. So much stuff and so much fun. Everything from posters for bands he likes, to an organised bike race to every chip shop in town. Some projects grew into bigger things, and some did not. He didn’t care though; why worry? There are plenty more ideas where they came from. I’m a horrible cynic usually, but his enthusiasm was so infectious it still makes me smile to think about it now.

And Sam was something else altogether. He set up a knitting machine and while he was talking, knitted 5 frames of Eadweard Muybridge’s running horse. At one point he shouted “Any knitters in the audience? Eat my dust!” Ironing to a soundtrack of Crazy Horses he then videoed each piece to recreate a pixelated version of Muybridge’s animation. Writing about it now it doesn’t sound like much but it was frenetic and compelling. I’ve followed his work ever since - he does fantastic community projects and public art pieces.

It’s very easy to say things were better in the old days, but on seeing the video I couldn’t help but miss those times when we (I?) just did stuff for the hell of it. For the joy of doing it and seeing what would happen. And seeing it on a place like LinkedIn too. Where everyone is doing #thoughtleadership in the hope that what will happen is a repost, a pat on the back or another jump up the career ladder. Arbitrary stupid goal indeed. (Or these days, with a cost of living crisis, maybe not. Each to their own, I guess.) 

Wednesday 7 December

France, family and the circus. A woman hangs from her hair and yet dances carefree. There’s a man who can fall like water. And another who, semi naked, with a horses tail attached (not inserted) chews my hair while everyone watches. Later, a man with the face of an angel walks a tightrope. 

Thursday 8 December

We drive north from Toulouse. Across the top of deep, tree-lined valleys. 

Friday 9 December

We visit Sarlat, a medieval town, always nice at this time of year. Inexplicably, they have a small Christmas market – the kind with wooden sheds and handmade gifts of varying quality and origin. And it’s all decorated in green, white and orange. At the end is an ‘Irish Christmas Pub’. I’m still not sure what made it Irish, but I don’t think it was the stalls selling duck or pretzels.

Saturday 10 December 

Sneak out for a walk at sunset. The leaves glow orange.

Later, France beats England in the world cup. In a half-French half-English household, it doesn’t seem to matter much.

[greatwyrmgold]

@evil-women-step-on-me: Taking this out of the replies for space.

Thermian argument? I was suggesting that you're jumping the gun a little. This a lot to extrapolate from what basically amounts to the single time a Begonia Group operation has ever been addressed, and from the most recent chapter no less, at what seems to be the start of a Begonia Group-centric arc. (1/2)

(2/2) If you wrote this post many more chapters down the line and even then, human/drug trafficking was all the Begonia Group was written to be about, I would agree with it completely.

I understand what you mean, but I still think this is a fair critique to make.

First off, if any ordinary crime takes the spotlight from the Begonia's trafficking-children-to-make-deadly-superpower-drugs thing, I will eat my hat. I will buy a hat so I have a hat to eat. This is just so obviously, absurdly significant.

Just about the only crimes that could become more plot-relevant are "Murder (but of a character who matters this time)" or "A villainous plot to take over and/or destroy the world as we know it," neither of which are ordinary crimes. I guess murder kinda is, but they already murdered a bunch of people, and the deadly superpower drugs are still given more focus. It's not "Investigate these murders done by drug dealers," it's "Investigate this drug ring that murdered the previous investigators".

Second off, the human trafficking drugs aren't just some arbitrary crime the Begonia Group committed. It's not even a very high-profile crime they committed. It is their introduction. (I think they were mentioned in some previous episode, but I don't remember when, and we didn't get details.) Here are the criminals, here's them murdering a bunch of Aberrant Corps agents, here's the murder drugs those murders were supposed to protect.

And this introduction barely tells us anything about the Begonia Group. We don't learn about their leaders' personalities or Gifts or names or anything. We don't learn about their other activities, or their headquarters, or what kind of people they recruit. We learn about Rapture, we learn about the human trafficking that fuels it, we learn that they killed some agents to protect their murder drug business.

This is a whole bunch of choices. The choice to connect the murders to one crime, the choice to make that crime trafficking-children-to-make-deadly-superpower-drugs, the choice to focus on the crime instead of the criminals. And it all points in the same direction.

Third, I'm only commenting on this because it's an example of a pattern. (I originally intended to write a criticism of the pattern, not this specific example, but in retrospect I failed at that.) If Hand Jumper was the only story which focused on this specific vision of kidnapping kids to make evil drugs, it probably wouldn't have bugged me. "Wow!" I'd say. "Super serum made from people? What a neat idea!"

But it's not unique. Lots of stories have that kind of plot point, and that kind of plot point is a specific expression of a trope that spans practically every genre where organized crime exists. On one hand, this makes every example of that trope more annoying. On the other hand, it gives me absolutely zero reason to expect Hand Jumper will break free of the pattern it's so cleanly fitting into.

The Begonia Group's (cliche) Crimes

Okay, nuance first. Drug dealing is a common way for crime syndicates to make money, and human trafficking is way more common than it should be. And there's some effort made to distinguish this from most fictional drug/human traffickers by mixing in some unique elements of Hand Jumper's setting. And Webtoon's format makes it tricky to get screenshots of the relevant bits of exposition.

But I'm kinda tired of drugs and human trafficking (and sometimes protection rackets) being all the business-crime that fictional gangs participate in. There are plenty of other kinds of crime, you know? There's other kinds of contraband, smuggling legal items to avoid tariffs and such, prostitution that doesn't involve human trafficking, several varieties of illegal gambling, fencing stolen goods, money laundering, other kinds of white-collar crime, and plenty of stuff that I can't think of off the top of my head.

But it's always drugs and human trafficking, and usually versions that make them more "dramatic" to the expected audience. This is really easy to explain for human trafficking.

Fictional depictions usually show the criminals kidnapping people in affluent areas for nefarious purposes; sex slavery if they're boring, some supernatural or soft-sci-fi gimmick if they're trying not to be boring. In the real world, human trafficking usually involves taking desperate people from poor places to rich places, usually willingly (or by lying to them about the destination/cost of their journey). Human trafficking sometimes ends in sex slavery, but can also end in other kinds of forced labor, and in some cases it can be closer to illegal immigration than slavery.

None of this nuance or variety exists in pop culture human trafficking. And this doesn't just give people an inaccurate understanding of crimes that affect real people; it's also repetitive. Hand Jumper is not the only East Asian comic where some people have unique superpowers where a white-haired kid with superpowers was kidnapped by a crime syndicate and had his blood extracted to manufacture a substance which messes with the source of those superpowers. And My Hero Academia also has an illegal drug which makes people stronger with health consequences, though it's separate from the stuff made from Eri's blood.

This trope isn't an effective way to depict real-world organized crime, or even to construct dramatic scenarios out of parts of what those criminals do. It feels designed to make the fictional criminals seem as evil as possible, especially when the drugs being dealt are the Evil Drugs that you get by either exaggerating the effects of real drugs or making stuff up.

Which is pretty silly. There are other ways to make us think your fictional mafia are bad guys.

[quandaryqueen]

The War of Jokes and Riddles Riddler Mild NSFW Headcanons

I didn't intend this to be sexual at first but my sleep deprived brain was on autopilot and somehow I awoke from my reverie and be met with whatever this is. Enjoy I guess.

🔞 MINORS DNI

💚 An absolute Dom in and outside the bedroom. You cannot tell me, that this man can make anyone do his bidding with one word. Like, you'd think that he controls the universe with how much influence he has on people. Admittedly, not all can bend to his will, but oh god does it seem so tempting to obey him and hear him praise you?

💚 👏BODY👏WORSHIP👏

Both receiving and giving.

It's seldom that he gives out praises and when he does, he means it. And boy, will he be pleased to know from you that you appreciate him the same way as he does.

💚 This man appreciates a good slow burn in pretty much everything. Nothing like building the passion, the tasteful anticipation, the thrill of edging. And the scoundrel is one hell of a tease, he lives off of seeing you squirm and let out pitiful whines, pleading and pleasing him to finally get on with it.

💚 I'm getting service top vibes from him. Like, at arbitrary moments he'll find himself wanting to hear you screech his name and then suddenly he's between your legs. Buuuuuuut, he certainly wouldn't say no if you were to return the service.

💚 There are times wherein he wouldn't be by your side, something he finds unbearable and so he substitutes his his presence with a present, something to remember him by (because by god, this man can disappear for months). Gifts differ, from jewelry, sex toys, an article of his clothing with his perfume embedded on it, a full outfit, etc etc.

He knows these gifts are not going to proxy his presence, so he also includes a thoughtful letter detailing his disappearance. Detailed, meaning Batman can get to you for information but good luck to Bats if he can even try to get through you. Edward trusts you enough to make his plans known to you and knows that you will never spill. 

💚 Aftercare is massively crucial for him as much as the lengthy foreplay. There is no way in hell that he'd leave you after sex, he may be a scoundrel but he's no 'hit-it-and-leave-it'. If this seems like it's a grand gesture to you, to him, it isn't. It's bare fucking minimum, take notes everyone. So he'll attend to whatever you need, honey 😊

💚 Handsy. He practically drapes his arms on your shoulders, the small of your back, waist, or holding your hand in his, or that elbow looping thing too. When he embraces you, it's always close, always lengthy, as if he never wants to let go. And in make out sessions, his hands runs over your body, appreciating every single inch of your skin.

💚 LINGERIE. There's nothing more to say here, he will show how grateful he is if you were to greet him with you in a pretty lingerie. Also wearing his colour? Oh my, slow this rabid man down or he might just rip it off you. To be frank, he couldn't care less about the lingerie, but to take your time and cash to do something for him? Mmm mmm 😩

[bethanydelleman]

The Gift of the Necklace

Two Jane Austen men attempt to give women they are not engaged to gifts: Willoughby and Henry Crawford. Willoughby attempts to give Marianne a horse, which is turned down, but Henry successfully gives Fanny a necklace and also “gifts” her a promoted brother. I find the necklace to be a very interesting gift.

Willoughby tries to give Marianne a gift that he should know she can’t accept. Maybe this was a plan, but I tend to think it was just carelessness. Willoughby doesn’t live within his own income, so he probably wouldn’t consider that the Dashwoods can in no way afford a horse. They also do not have a stable  and would have to buy a second horse so a servant can ride with Marianne. It is totally ridiculous.

Henry’s gift is far more thought out and practical. Say what you will about Henry, but when he is focused on Fanny, he is FOCUSED. To give this gift, Henry had to notice that Fanny didn’t actually own any jewellery, because if she did, she would have never accepted it. Henry noticed that Fanny was wearing the amber cross from William on a ribbon and successfully guessed, from the Bertram’s general treatment of Fanny, that she didn’t own a necklace to put it on.

This gift was incredibly kind, while also being manipulative, because unlike Fanny, the Crawfords must know that she would be opening the upcoming ball. Fanny is going to be stared at by many people and she is going to look shabby. Despite making Lady Bertram a new gown, the Bertrams seem to have totally forgotten that this is also Fanny’s debut (not shocking). Henry and Mary are trying to save Fanny from embarrassment, while also trying to make Fanny like Henry more. But the big point is, if the Bertrams had not neglected Fanny, there would be no need for Henry and Mary to fill. Their neglect has made her vulnerable to outside influence.

I can see how the Crawfords easily justified this gift to themselves, because they totally know it is improper, especially Mary telling Fanny that she must be grateful to Henry. I can see them saying to each other, “It’s not like anyone else is going to help her.” Because Henry is right when he calls Sir Thomas’s charity to Fanny “arbitrary” and that she has no other allies in the house except Edmund. This is particularly galling to the reader because we know that Sir Thomas had these nobel ideas of properly introducing Fanny into the world. Edmund and Henry were the ones who in the end ensured that Fanny had a proper introduction.

So yes, the gift was wrong, but I can see why Mary brings it up to prove Henry’s affection for Fanny. It does prove that he noticed her and wanted to fill a need that she had. It shows that as a husband, he would not neglect her. It also unfortunately shows that Henry and Mary are willing to circumvent social norms, which is not high on the list of things Fanny admires.

One thing I want is more insight into Mary’s participation. Mary does not seem to help or hinder Henry’s pursuit of Maria and Julia, she just kind of watches. Now to be fair, Henry didn’t need any help, but it gives us an idea that Mary just ignores her brother’s flirtations. Henry cannot give the necklace to Fanny, it must be from Mary, but Mary also tells Fanny that it was originally Henry’s and to think of him. Now is she helping with the flirtation or giving credit where credit is due? She says later that it was all Henry’s idea, so maybe she just wants to return some stolen laurels.

Either way, the overall effect is some very awkward feelings for Fanny. As readers, we know how deeply Fanny values gratitude and this created obligation towards Fanny is not exactly admirable on the part of either Crawford.