#ghoap x karlach

[karlachismylife]

Juju's Masterlist

god i love how they look at each other when i place pictures like this

Figured this might be needed! As I am planning to spam-reblog so much cool stuff...

Hi, I'm Juju (or Juju Starr more formally XD), 22 yo and in this blog I primarly write things on the rarepair I came up with, Karlach (Baldur's Gate 3) x Soap (Call of Duty: Modern Warfare, reboot trilogy by default).

However, I also write things in both these fandoms with other characters, different ships (including other ships with Karlach and Soap), poly ships, x reader and x OC. There are NSFW ones and I will be checking every blog interacting with them, so minors and ageless blogs DNI, please.

Requests are open! Send in anything <3

*also I have no idea if I'm using the word blurb right, feel free to correct!

The masterlist itself is under the cut!

First mention of Karlach x Soap (a little overview of the ship dynamic)

I Might Have A Type (a post mentioning how the ship was born, trust me, there's concrete evidence of them being compatible)

All things Karlach x Soap (thoughts, fics, little ideas and concepts - simply sorted by hashtag)

Karlach x Soap fics

Morning Routine (blurb, fluff, 238 words) - Karlach, Soap and shaving

Birds of a Feather (blurb, fluff, 271 words) - Karlach and her dynamic with task force 141

They're Horny (blurb, smutty (NSFW), 228 words) - Karlach is horny and Soap is horny, but there's a difference (there's not)

Explosive Love (blurb, fluff, 105 words) - what it's like when you have a demolitions expert and a walking bomb on your team

Not Fair (blurb, angst, 457 words) - Soap is there when Karlach breaks down after the death of a certain bastard

Restless Fingers (blurb, fluff, 130 words) - one word: fidgeting

Scar Twinsies (blurb, fluff, 245 words) - surviving Hell and blowing shit up leaves similar marks

Practice Makes Perfect (oneshot, fluff, 932 words) - something from Soap's weaponry catches Karlach's eye and he does not miss an opportunity for a date

Tactic Tactile Affections (headcanons, fluff, 764 words) - it's not just about kissing and fucking!

Baby Fever (blurb, fluff, 260 words) - can you imagine their babies tho (C)

Is It Visual Stimming or Is He A Romantic? (oneshot, fluff, 945 words) - something about smouldering coal is just so mesmerizing... what are you looking at, Johnny?

Hey Skullboy (blurb, fluff w/angst, 467 words) - Karlach shares with Ghost not only his sergeant, but also trauma

Solar Eclipse mini-series (2 parts)

Total Eclipse of the Heart (mini, fluff w/angst, 1286 words) - dog tags can be so many things, learns Karlach when she spots an unfamilar piece of jewelry among other alien things Soap brought from his world (part 1) Worshipping the Sun (mini, fluffy smut (NSFW), 4201 words) - solar eclipse is beautiful, thinks Johnny when he looks at his circular dogtags blocking out the glowing light of Karlach's engine. He wouldn't mind seeing a thousand of those as soon as he gets a chance to make the little steel plates bounce on her chest (part 2)

Introductions (blurb, fluff, modern!AU, 105 words) - what Soap would call Karlach in modern!AU

Two of Us Wearing Raincoats (headcanons, fluff, partially suggestive, partially modern!AU, 2855 words) - requested domestic fluff, a lot of it!

Love Texting (blurb, fluff, modern!AU, 96 words) - what their texting looks like (Karlach is illiterate, Soap is Soap)

(Be)longing (blurb, suggestive fluff, 190 words) - Johnny and collars, am I right?

Bath Time (blurb, fluff, 246 words) - sharing a bath to save time

Good Night And Joy Be To You All (oneshot, angst or hurt/comfort with hopeful ending, 1233 words) - Karlach finds Johnny standing on the edge of a cliff and knows all too well what it's like to miss your home

Afterglow Kisses (drabble, fluff, 646 words) - they make love, they kiss with love, they are in love

Karlach x Ghoap (Ghost x Soap) fics

Package Deal (blurb, fluff, 135 words) - tame one golden retriever, get one free

None Are Free Until (blurb/idea, angst w/fluff, modern!AU, 558 words) - anarchist!Karlach and everything complicated because of that

All The Leaves Are Brown (oneshot, fluff with a bit of hurt/comfort, modern!AU, 1463 words) - anarchist!Karlach, Soap and Ghost in the face of impending cold of the autumn

Call of Duty fics

Random Characters Assortment

Their favourite body part/touch headcanons (Price, Ghost, Soap, Gaz, Nikolai, König, Valeria blurbs, fluff, partially suggestive, no use if Y/N gn!reader-insert, can be read as character x character too, 1367 words) - their favourite way to touch you and such

Task Force 141 Ensemble

Their reaction to you playing datesim games (individual oneshots, fluff, partially suggestive (NSFW), no use of Y/N gn!reader-insert, 5073 words) - how do they find out and what do they think?

You're a character in their favourite game (individual blurbs, fluff, no use of Y/N gn!reader-insert, 786 words) - how do they approach you in-game?

The Queen of the Clan || Series masterlist (hyena shapeshifter!AU, no use of Y/N fem!chubby!reader-insert) - when you decide to shake up your life a bit and partake in a trip with a documentary crew, you have no idea that meeting an unnaturally friendly hyena and have it mark your backpack would be only the beginning of weird things to come. Whatever will you do when a leaderless clan of four male hyenas chooses you as their matriarch?

You're having a bad time after sex (individual oneshots for every man + poly 141, hurt/comfort, NSFW, dark themes, no use of Y/N gn!chubby/fat!reader-insert, 7351 words) - due to hormonal withdrawal after sex you spiral into a severe episode of self-loathing and body image issues, but you have someone to comfort you

You got sick (individual drabbles for every man + poly!hyena!141, fluff, partially suggestive (NSFW), sickfic, no use of Y/N gn!sick!reader-insert, 1834 words) - their rection if you got sick

You have chronic illness (poly 141 headcanons, fluff, sickfic, no use of Y/N gn!reader-insert, 2388 words) - the way they care for you if you have chronic illness

Mini force 141 headcanons (poly mini 141 headcanons, silly fluff, no use of Y/N gn!reader-insert, 1104 words) - what if task force 141, but reaaaal smol? (Inspired by a tiktok)

Task force 141 VS head massager thingy (individual drabbles for every man + poly!hyena!141, fluff, tiniest bit suggestive, no use of Y/N gn!reader-insert, 1038 words) - their complicated relathionship with the head massager

Thoughts on task force 141 and weed (individual headcanons, 748 words) - my limited perception of the topic

Task force 141 VS cute puppies (individual headcanons, fluff, 628 words) - if they need to take care of puppies, what's their approach?

Task force 141 VS raccoons (individual drabbles, fluff, no use of Y/N gn!reader-insert, 2265 words) - how do they deal with raccoons that come to your home?

Task force 141 carving Halloween pumpkins (individual drabbles, fluff, no use of Y/N gn!reader-insert, 2425 words) - what's their technique when it comes to creating Jack-o'-lanterns?

Forehead kisses (individual headcanons, fluff, no use of Y/N gn!reader-insert, 569 words) - them giving you forehead kisses

Soap

Rushed (blurb, fluff, 78 words) - what some consider rushed, Johnny considers almost too late

Mohawk Appreciation Time (blurb, fluff, mentioned Karlach x Soap but Soap-centred, 249 words) - I do not condone calling his mohawk stupid unless it's fully affectionate!

Emotional Support Dog (oneshot, fluff, no use of Y/N gn!reader-insert, 1132 words) - when you're struggling with work-related stress, Johnny's there for support

I'm In Love 100 Times (oneshot, fluff, no use of Y/N gn!reader-insert, 485 words) - when you look at Soap, you almost choke on your love for him, but he's there to rescue

Don't You Forget About Me (oneshot, silly fluff, no use of Y/N fem!reader-insert (reader is Soap's mother), 1208 words) - your son is a troublemaker, but he's a good boy (and you're just as stubborn as him)

Masochistic Kid With a Split Lip (oneshot, hurt/comfort, no use of Y/N gn!sergeant!reader-insert, 1106 words) - Soap gets messed up on a mission, but he's just as irresistable

Fear Of the Depth (blurb co-created with @killerpancakeburger, kinda hurt/comfort or a little angst, mentioned Soap x reader but Soap-centred, 334 words) - what would Soap's one fear be?

Elevator Story (blurb/irl storytime that is very Soap-coded, fluff I guess, 277 words) - a story from my real life that was just too good to not tell

Gratitude From The Top (Of His Lungs) (oneshot, short smut, no use of Y/N gn!bottom!reader-insert, 569 words) - sometimes Soap whimpers when you let him finish inside

Gratitude From The Bottom (Of His Heart) (oneshot, short smut, no use of Y/N gn!top!reader-insert, 639 words) - sometimes Soap whimpers when you finish inside

Ghost

Now They Ain't Got a Prayer (oneshot, hurt/comfort, no use of Y/N gn!military!reader-insert, 1479 words) - after a mission goes not like planned, there's a heavy feeling in the air, but there's something even heavier in your chest

Flutter Into the Skies (oneshot, fluff, no use of Y/N fem!girly!reader-insert, 1277 words) - Simon is being a menace while you're trying to get ready for a friend's wedding, but you have your ways to take revenge

And We Just Disagree (oneshot, hurt/comfort, no use of Y/N gn!reader-insert, 900 words) - arguments are an unpleasant, but unavoidable part of life, and good thing you and Simon can resolve them well

Chains Of Love (oneshot, hurt/comfort, no use of Y/N gn!civilian!reader-insert, 929 words) - dating Simon Riley wasn't an easy job, but an honest talk might save you from falling off this tiring swing

Wanting To Hold You (oneshot, fluff, no use of Y/N gn!reder-insert, 1534 words) - Simon is a menace, so why can't you be a menace too, just to put him in his place for once?

People Are Strange (oneshot, no use of Y/N afab!reader/self-insert, 2917 words) - you're in your own artistic world when someone who says he's your neighbour knocks on your door (this is very-very my self-insert)

Gaz

I Need a Hero (oneshot, fluf, no use of Y/N gn!civilian!reader-insert, 538 words) - Kyle is finally getting a medal and you're just happy for your man

Come On Baby, Light My Fire (oneshot, fluff, no use of Y/N gn!civilian!reader-insert, 887 words) - you finally get to celebrate Guy Fawkes Night, with Kyle by your side no less

Temptation When I Look At You (oneshot, fluff, no use of Y/N gn!reader, 2229 words) - going out with friends for a board game even turns into you poorly executing your flirtint skills and... scoring a date?

Price

I Need My Love To Be Here (oneshot, fluff, no use of Y/N fem!reader-insert, 715 words) - while your husband is away, you daughter is being a little troublemaker. But you're both good enough girls to recieve a special gift!

Valeria

Desnuda Tu Mente (oneshot, suggestive, no use of Y/N gn!reader-insert, 1015 words) - your life depends on the will of her blade, and you're absolutely thrilled by it

Ghoap (Ghost x Soap)

Help! (blurb, fluff, 213 words) - thoughts on Simon Riley and The Beatles

Fem!Ghoap mini-series

Wrestle Ye (oneshot/blurb, fluff, 751 words) - what would fem!ghoap be like and how would they fall in love? (Spoiler: with a bang) No Woman Left Dirty (oneshot, suggestive fluff, 1192 words) - how does Soap find her way into Ghost's apartment? And why does hair length matter?

Nikprice (Nikolai x Price)

Sleepy (blurb co-created with @devil-in-hiding, fluff, partially suggestive, no use of Y/N fem!mom!reader-insert, 498 words) - waking up on rainy mornings is hard, especially you have the weight of responsibilities for your baby and home on your shoulders. Unless there's someone to share the burden...

Hesh

Standing For Something (oneshot, hurt/comfort, no use of Y/N gn!reader-insert, 660 words) - getting ambushed and shot isn't exactly pleasant, but your Lieutenant is a good man and makes everything a little better

Baldur's Gate fics

Dammon

Forged Under the Stars (oneshot, fluff, no use of Y/N gn!reader-insert, 1157 words) - at the Tiefling Party Dammon comes over to sit with you under the stars

will be re-working this thing

[kb1301]

The Shipping Board

Hello! This is the Shipping Board, where I just put what ship I'm into across different fandoms! OC x Canon ships will occur because I said so. Anything in bold and red means a favorite ship out of favorites.

Destiny 2

O14 / Osiris x Saint-14 (You cannot go wrong with them)

Shaxx12 / Lord Shaxx x Maximus-12 (Main and canon for my Warlock)

Saint-14 x Maximus-12

O14 x Lord Shaxx (Thanks to Zalia for this!)

Lord Shaxx x Saint-14 (I need more of these two Titans together)

MaxCayde / Cayde-6 x Maximus-12 (Canon within the main universe for my Warlock but never fully became fruitful)

CayShaxx12 / Cayde-6 x Lord Shaxx x Maximus-12 (Max can hold each of their hands… come on now)

Tataaks / Misraaks x Tatag-9 (Main and canon ship for my Exo Titan, loyal Guardian to his Kell)

ShiroTag / Shiro-4 x Tatag-9 (I think having a mostly no-nonsense Hunter be in my Exo Titan’s life would be something)

Candal / Cayde-6 x Andal Brask

Felshaxx / Shaxxwinter / Lord Shaxx x Lord Felwinter

O14 x Maximus-12 (AU ship for my Warlock)

O14 x Shaxx12 (the fantasy foursome for Max / my headcanon polyamory where they're all husbands)

Call of Duty

Ghostsoap / Soapghost / Ghoap (Original and Reboot)

Korangi / König x Horangi

Ghostkonig / Ghost x König

Kruegernikto

Ghostsoaproach / Ghost x Soap x Roach

Gazprice / Pricegaz

Nikprice

Alerudy

Walruss / Keegan x Logan

Baldur's Gate 3

Gale x Tav/Durge

Shadowheart x Tav/Durge

Karlach x Tav/Durge

Shae'zel (?) / Shadowzel / Shadowheart x Lae'zel

Shadowlach / Shadowheart x Karlach

Bladeweave / Gale x Wyll

Bloodweave / Gale x Astarion

Bloodpact / Bloodblade / Wyll x Astarion

Durgetash (my preference though is default Durge)

Fallout

Craig Boone x Male Courier

Charon x Male Lone Wanderer

Paladin Danse x Male Sole Survivor

Ghoulcy / Vaultghoul / Lucy MacLean x The Ghoul

Maximus x Thaddeus

Elder Scrolls

Teldryn Sero x Male Dragonborn

Razum-dar x Male Vestige (mostly Khajiit)

Sharp-as-Night x Male Vestige (mostly Khajiit but Argonian too)

Mass Effect

Shakarian & MShakarian

Sheptali (both Shepards!!!)

Shiara (both Shepards!!!)

Shenko & MShenko

Shepard x Jack

Shawson

Dragon Age

Alistair x the Warden

Leliana x the Warden

Morrigan x the Warden

Zevran x the Warden

Handers / Hawke x Anders

Fenhawke / Hawke x Fenris

Isabela x Hawke

Fenders / Fenris x Anders

Cullistair / Cullen x Alistair

Josephine Montilyet x the Inquisitor (they are an aspec relationship in my headcanon)

Transformers (Any Continuity)

Wavewave

Megop

Optiratch

Soundop

Shockop

Dratchet

Dimension 20

Theopin / Theobald Gumbar x Lapin Cadbury

Ruehob / Delloso de la Rue x K. P. Hob

Inkblade / Oisin Hakinvar x Adaine Abernant

Figayda / Figueroth Faeth x Ayda Aguefort

Other Fandoms

Reymas / Reynauld x Dismas / Crusader x Highwayman (Darkest Dungeon)

Kapglaz / Glazkan / Kapkan x Glaz (Rainbow Six Siege)

Liondoc / Doclion / Lion x Doc (Rainbow Six Siege)

Poolverine / Deadclaws / Deadpool x Wolverine (Marvel)

Spideypool / Spiderman x Deadpool (Marvel)

Gabv1el / Gabriel x V1 (Ultrakill)

Minosgabe / Minos Prime x Gabriel (Ultrakill)

[karlachismylife]

Damn I wish I could vote on all yours, they sound so good 😍

I'm in a very low writing spot and I do know which one everyone is waiting for, but that's the one I will not put here for Reasons. It's just not going, comrades, I am completely in the wrong headspace for Queen of the Clan rn. Other than that, something I can actually squeeze out of myself (sorry, no titles, just summaries)

Yes, a lot of them are Christmas specials, but what can I say, tis the season. I just wanna stop adding new wips to the list and cross some out...

I think almost everyone I would tag for this already got it, so @killerpancakeburger @devil-in-hiding @valscodblog and open no pressure tags, come on, let us see what's cooking

WIP List Tag Game

Thank you @lemonsrosesandlavender, this was something I had been wondering about for a while - what it was people were interested in - so I appreciate the tag to push it into reality!

Rules: Make a 24hr poll listing the titles of every WIP you want to work on. (It’s fine if you only have one, still make a poll for the vote count). Write 1 sentence for every vote received.

A few no pressure tags, and also a heartfelt open invitation - I had considered doing this for my own interest with an open invitation too! @threerattsinatrenchcoat @velocitross @wakacreations @faerie-with-a-knife @vera-king-hrfl

[karlachismylife]

Johnny's dead on the ground.

Correction: Johnny's dying on the ground. Time warps and stretches out, his last seconds dragging for ages long enough for galaxies to be born and die in blindingly white sparkles before his wide open eyes. His limbs grow cold and stiff, akin to pork legs hanging down in smelly rows inside a butcher's freezer - meat that went through a slaughterhouse, his temple stil throbbing after a bolt gun aimed at the fine cattle.

Slaughtered in a blink of an eye, no higher aim or meaning. Simple as that, just a young lamb down.

It burns, this spot, fevereshly hot, something steamy and moist leaking down his cheek and jawline. Feels like a branding iron stuck to his skin, warmth spreading around it through otherwise cooling off body. White pain so bad that hot and cold start to mix up, creating a stagnant, sickly burial shroud of warmth around him - it hovers, but doesn't touch him.

Leaves him without his last consolation.

His chest is compressed, barely able to move for another wheezing breath. A considerable weight pressing down on him, preventing from filling his lungs properly for what may be his last time - steel hoops stacked flush to each other tighten around his ribs. The fire that was burning through his temple finally eats through his flesh to his eyes.

His lashes flutter and he loses sight, stinging white finally replaced with a comfortable black.

Johnny's dead on the ground.

The weight on top of him shifts, relieving some of itself from his chest, and a blow of cool air hits the damp side of his face that was branded by that scorching heat, immediately making his skin prickle. Uncomfortable, Soap scrunches his nose and unwillingly opens his eyes.

There are two yellow feline eyes staring right back at him in front of his mug, and the moment they spot him move, a Cheshire cat smile spreads on the handsome face above, sharp fangs flashing. Something whips at his freezing knee.

"Hey, soldier," coos Karlach in a hushed tone, brushing the tip of her nose along his. "Got ya, eh? You're dead."

"Aye. KIA, bonnie. Ye'll havtae tell mah Mam."

With a sigh, now that the whole mass of a beefy tiefling isn't crushing his ribs, Soap wipes the temple she kissed and left the wetness of her breath on, and drops his wide spread arms in a dramatic gesture - or preparation to make a snow angel. The legs will probably be all fucked up after he got ambushed by Karlach and tumbled into the thick winter crystal blanket with her in a wrestling embrace.

"You'll tell her yourself. Come on, get up, it's your turn!" Karlach snorts, wrinkling her nose in an adorable snicker, and Johnny blinks at her as she rises to her feet with a grunt. There are rogue snowflakes stuck to his eyelashes, and they fracture the light in a way that creates a holy rainbow halo around her devilish horns.

"Hm... nae, Ah'm comfy 'ere." He grins and immediately gets rammed into his side, rolling over with a pained "oomf!" - the push Karlach gives him is softened by the thick winter attire, so Johnny needs to play up the ache. "Och! Did na yin teach ye nae tae kick who's already doon?"

"Get yer arse up, Johnny. Don't want ya freezing yer bollocks off, eh? Gonna need 'em later." Snow seems to forget it's crunchy and squeaky under heavy boots when it's Ghost walking up to them. Before Simon can scruff him, Johnny's already up and shaking wet white chunks off his ass with a huge grin plastered on his face.

"I'm not waiting for you, mate. You're it!" - is all they hear before Karlach turns into a bright red smudge on a snowy slope, her heavy footsteps sinking into the pliant cover on the ground.

"Well?" Simon raises an eyebrow and nods in the direction of the fleeing tiefling. "Your bird's flyin' away."

Good thing he's almost finished with his ciggy, because in the glossy blue eyes Johnny squints against the reflective brightness of the snow reads clear as day - Ghost is getting tagged next.

[karlachismylife]

Oh but what if in the anarchist!Karlach au she and Johnny find no better way to deal with their conflicted feelings on this awkward reunion than to literally beat each other up.

Just go to a barren sandlot on the outskirts of the town and let their frustrations that were brewing for years out in the form of a nasty, feral fistfight. Bloody knuckles, cherry red framing Karlach's paprika red cheekbone running from her split eyebrow, Johnny's swollen and bleeding lips with bright crimson tinting his teeth. Karlach's tail yanked so hard they hear several vertebras cracking being pulled apart, Soap wheezing as she tries to throttle him pinned down on the dusty ground among trash. Years of hurt seeping through with sweat and foaming drool, anger boiling their blood to the point of steam rising from their skin into the chilly morning air. Stray dogs living in the lot pausing their search for food scraps in the improvised dump to look at a human and a tiefling losing all sentience to growl at each other helplessly when they put each other in headlocks.

And Ghost finally tracking them down after he woke up with Johnny nowhere to be seen, only to witness them sitting on the ground, covered in blood, sweat, dust and trash, resting their foreheads against each other and maybe crying - hard to tell with all the grime making little trails on their faces.

Simon sure knows how to pick them.

[karlachismylife]

The way Ghoap are just a package deal in my head...

Like, I already struggle with making everything poly (cuz why can't all my faves just be one huge ass happy family huh??), but ghoap take it to some other level. Whenever I think about Karlach x Soap (which I do every day) I find myself spiraling into Karlach x Ghoap in like twenty minutes max.

Ghost would fight so hard to stay a brooding traumatized mess with two certified golden retrievers absolutely BUZZIN with love. My man, I'm so sorry, I think you'll have smile lines engraved in your face.

Poor poor baby Simon who doesn't get to view himself as a shell of a man unworthy of love. How can he survive? I dunno. Must be tough being adored by two literal sunshines.

[karlachismylife]

Anarchist!Karlach lives in my head rent-free (I am yet to write something very special to me on the topic with the main ship being Karlach/Astarion), and now I'm thinking about ex-military!Karlach, disappointed in the system!Karlach, soldier turned anarchist!Karlach

that still loves her childhood friend (friend? brother? sweetheart?) Johnny who joined military with her, but chose a different path after they witnessed the rot within and refused to turn a blind eye to that

that still believes that they both want to do what's right, but the world around them forces so much walls, distrust and rivalry between them that they fail to see that fire in each other, convinced that they can never be allies

that wants to reach her hand out when Johnny comes back to hometown after years away and show him the horizontal network she built in the comunity they both belonged to, but gets growled at by the distrusting masked looming shadow he calls Ghost (and loves so openly, still averse to hiding his feelings)

that can't hide her feelings either, but has absolutely no idea what to do and feels like a lost little tiefling with a puny red tail and a missing tooth before a human embodiment of sunshine reaches his hand out to invite her to play football

that feels like that pacemaker she brought home from the army might just about explode and give out if she doesn't do something soon

that finds out that the way to Johnny's heart still lies through the hearts of people he cares about

that learns to love Ghost too

and barrels through walls literally and figuratively along the way

[karlachismylife]

I have four fresh asks in my inbox that all bring me immense joy and I wanna give all four quite lengthy answers, so asking for a lil bit of patience from my beautful anons, the brain juice is juicing (is this an appropriate thing to say considering that two out of four are piss-related? i dunno) 🙏🏼 I am once again sleepy for god knows what reason so I came here to ramble sleepily. Surprisingly no unhinged feral thoughts tonight.

Just Karlach, Soap and Ghost. Probably from the anarchist!Karlach au, but far, far down the line, when everything between them is finally resolved and their little weird and unlikely family is together.

Holy shit it somehow became a oneshot.

All The Leaves Are Brown

(Title from "California Dreamin'" by Hi Standard)

Dingy little apartment, messy and a tad bit unlivable, smelling like petrol, paint and cigarette smoke, partially stripped of furniture, half-painted murals on just recently plastered walls, window frames old and frail, letting draft in. It's okay, though, it's not that far into the autumn cold yet, so no need to whip out whatever hermetic paste they decided to try this year.

Just a little bit chilly.

Chilly isn't a problem for them. Not when both Karlach and Soap are living, breathing furnaces, tank tops and matching boxer briefs letting the heat evaporate from the big surface of their naked skin. And there is plenty of heat as they laze about on the old couch, casing coming apart in the most rubbed on places, pillows dipping almost down to the floor, a single spring trying to bite into Karlach's ass as she sits there, Johnny perched on her thick thigh with his hands running up her stomach, the fabric of her loose top bunching up over his wrists.

They're just kissing, slow, sloppy, sensual makeout, puffy and sensitive - they've been going at it for quite some time already - lips catching onto each other. Johnny catches Karlach's lower lip ring between his, tugs carefully, gliding his tongue over the steel piercing and further into her mouth - only for it to be caught by the tiefling, sucked on and melted in the clove aftertaste of the pretentious black-wrapper cigarettes she spoils herself with.

Pulling back a bit, he slurps the excessive drool loudly, as if he was offered a really sweet caramel candy, causing them both to giggle, Karlach's nose wrinkling irresistibly. Johnny kisses those wrinkles with his wet lips, then brushes them against the snake bites piercings at the corners of her mouth, touches her little eyebrow ring and finally presses a soft, barely audible "chu" to her forehead, rendering Karlach completely soft and peaceful, yellow cat eyes fluttering close and her big palms coming to rest on the small of his back, not even noticing that it makes the hem of his tank top ride up just like hers.

"Tryna heat up the place, are ya?" Low chuckle startles them just a little bit - after a certain amount of time you just come to terms with living a literal ghost, able to move silently even when the ancient floorboards of the cheap apartment creak even under cockroaches' tiny little feet. Simon's quiet appearance still elicits simultaneous "fuck"s from his two warm sunshines, and he looks pleased with himself as he detaches himself from the wall he was leaning on for god knows how long. Watching them. Soaking in their love he had to learn to accept.

"Aya, dinnae want ye tae freeze yer auld bones, LT." Soap grins at him, sliding off Karlach's thigh onto the couch that immediately lets out the most pitiful and drawn out plea for mercy a piece of furniture is capable of. Karlach next to him crinkles her nose again and slaps her bare thigh in a more than clear invitation.

"Come on, soldier. We missed you."

Something buried, rotten and probably almost dead flutters in Simon's chest at this simple, fearlessly sincere and thus invincible in its vulnerability admission. He thinks everyone in the room can hear the disgusting sound of raw meat, chopped up and disfigured, fed to the worms and rejected even by them, churning in place of his heart - but neither bright-eyed Johnny with a mischievous smirk on his face, nor visibly excited Karlach with her tail twitching and coiling around nothingness on the floor, seem to be turned off by the gloom and darkness that Simon is.

Even after everything he put them through, they are just as eager to have him, if not more.

He comes closer, big, looming shadow, wrapped in all black from head to toe - from the hood of his skeleton hoodie obscuring his eyes to the socks, probably not a pair since he can't find a single matching one after that one time he let Karlach deal with the laundry. Doesn't matter, though, Simon just needs them to be warm, and that they are.

Autumn is his season, season of wet decay and exposed death, but he still barely handles the cold. Winter will be hard.

Two hands grab him at the same time, a considerable effort put into pulling him onto the couch between two buff bodies. Giving in just for the sake of the pleading puppy eyes, Simon carefully lowers himself onto the poor thing barely holding up - and finds himself in a heatwave.

Karlach and Johnny are searing hot as they wrap themselves around him, muscular thighs thrown over his manspread, one leathery tail coiled under his knee, burly arms holding him down by his waist and chest as if he might wrangle himself free and run away.

He would. Just some months ago, he would. Run away and leave scorched ground behind himself, empty shells and shattered hearts.

His, whole, reborn and red-blooded, gives away everything Simon would like to keep to himself, as it pumps like crazy, sending cold, viscous blood to his skin to get warmed up by the external heat of his lovers and come back as red surf washing over the internal organs.

"Should've come to us sooner, mate, you're freezing," rings Karlach's genuine worry in his ear. Booming voice that used to bring some deep-rooted hate from within muffled as Simon watches her grab his hand and shove it under her tank top generously. Her chest is burning hot, like he dipped his hand into boiling water after holding it in ice.

"Stubborn bastart." Soap grumbles into his other ear, lifting Simon's second palm and pressing hot kisses to his scarred knuckles. Black hoodie starts to get hot. "Hiding from us won't fly, LT."

Karlach's fat scar glides under his fingers - she leans closer, careful with her remaining horn, and Ghost half expects her to kiss him like she was kissing Johnny - hungrily and sensually, but instead he gets a soft nose brush and a peck onto the little bump with a scar he has after breaking it how many times.

"Why so shy all of a sudden, lass?" It's a weak attempt to regain control, and Karlach has no one control her. She shushes him with a quick peck to his mangled lips. Then on his cheek. His temple. Split eyebrow. Corner of his eyes.

"Just taking my time to look at you, soldier. And I like what I see." Her smile is blindingly bright and genuine. Simon's ears feel hot - he can't believe he would blush from a single compliment.

Turns out, it's just Johnny breathing open-mouthed breaths onto the tips of his ears to warm him up. Caught in broad daylight, he just snorts with a grin and latches onto Simon's neck, bringing out the shivers. Now that his hand is free from distracted Johnny, Ghost can bury his fingers in the outgrown mohawk and pull, earning an immediate moan and a more eager bite to the neck from his predictable mutt.

"Wanna take this off? We'll keep you warm, Si," Karlach's impatience is too obvious - in the way her tail squeezes his knee tighter and her fingers tug on the hem of the hoodie, urging Ghost to get rid of it.

The thought of shedding his thick cotton hide is cold. But when he does pull it off with a casual tug somewhere behind his scruff and over his head, Simon doesn't even get a chance to shudder, two living heaters plastering themselves over his both sides.

Slowly, without much coordination and with apologetic giggle from Karlach at the sound of suffering furniture, they all lean onto the back of the couch and pull their legs from the floor, tangling them and her tail together.

"Ye good?" Johnny tucks his head into the crook of Ghost's neck, his hot, wet breath hitting his pale collarbone peeking from the T-shirt's collar.

"I'll fix the windows tomorrow, don't worry, soldier. Someone from the commune brought good stuff from the city and promised to share." Simon frees his hand from Karlach's tank top and wraps it around her shoulders, scratching at the base of her broken horn absentmindedly. He would've refused help from her people proudly not so long ago. Nothing he needs from the scum like them.

But that scum is family now. And the windows need fixing. And finally someone is doing or for him, not waiting until he deals with all his problems himself.

Karlach's heart can't beat too fast nowadays, but her ears still twitch and her eyelashes flutter when he presses a kiss to her forehead.

"S'alright, love. I'm already plenty warm."

[karlachismylife]

Choosing what to work on?

Leaving this here before I go back to burning with my deadlines. Honestly I just need the fandom's validation, people here are so kind and talented, I want to spend quality time on something that will make people happy. A birthday gift - seeing what people are interested to read from me.

So. I have two WIPs. And two ideas.

WIP one: nearly finished (although I'm unhappy with it) steamy piece on Karlach x Soap exploring just how much Johnny loves Karlach's non-human features. Spoiler: a lot. One shot.

WIP two: a little (at least for now it's little) Karlach x Soap hurt/comfort inspired by beautiful landscapes and my love for the northern seas. Johnny needs a hug and he gets one and more. Karlach thinks she needs strength and realizes she already has it. One shot.

IDEA one: Smut as a logical continuation of this post. Solar eclipse is nice, bonnie, do you mind Soap seeing it a thousand and fourty-two times more while you ride him with his dogtags bouncing over the engine in your chest? One shot.

IDEA two: modern!biker!Karlach x Ghoap. Simon and Johnny finally move in together and find a nice apartment in a good low-key area, only for them to be deployed and come back in several months to the area's reputation sinking rapidly due to a certain crowd their new neighbour and their bike bring around. But come on, guys, it's not that bad; you know what they say: one gunshot into the air a month keeps the rent low. Multiple parts.

If nothing sounds interesting or you just have something else, requests are open for anything and everything involving task force 141 and baldur's gate characters, pairings, polyamory, x reader and x OC included. Send in and I'll think about it!

[karlachismylife]

character ask thingy for konig, thank you sm I hope your day is going great! <3

Oooh, König! I'm not talking about him much on here, am I? Might have something to do with the betrayal of my friend whom I dragged into the COD fandom for my Karlach x Soap team or at least Ghoap only to lose her to the Ghost x König gang... (I'm joking, we're still having fun, ship whomever you want). Thanks for asking!! And also thank you, my days are pretty okay lately, hope yours are too <3

If anyone else is interested, I'll be glad to talk about someone else from COD and BG3. The game itself is here if someone wants to reblog!

So, König, the big Austrian that has literally a couple parapgraphs of bio on the wiki but a ton of fans to make up for it, eh?

favorite thing about them

I'll do two, because one is mostly canon based and the other mostly headcanon, but not fully. The canon favourite thing is that he's imperfect at his job. It's not just his size that prevented him from becoming a sniper, it also says he is "unable to stay still". I think it would be easy to make him a total machine and just slap the social anxiety on top as the only "imperfection" he has, especially since he is a minor character in a fucking pew pew ka-boom game. But they literally said he's actually not that good at his job (like, if he's unable to stay still, this won't impact just his sniper abilities, you know?). So that's neat, I love when people are allowed to be not that perfect at their job. And the favourite headcanon thing is that he's a gentle giant, I just love the type. Yeah, he's huge and kills people, but he'll also cradle a little bunny like it's the most precious creature on Earth.

least favorite thing about them

Uhh apart from the fact that people for some reason (ahem, racism) replace Gaz with him instead of just adding him?.. I think he either compensates for his anxiety or just feels much more confident at work and it makes him a little too cocky without needed (for me at least) charisma/unseriousness towards himself. Judging mostly from his body language. I know he has a sense of humour, but yeah... maybe calm down a little big guy.

favorite line

Any of the few lines in German he has. Or the "pick your guts off the floor", lol. I just like German and König is a funny fella, especially when he sounds angy.

brOTP

König x Gaz! There have been a couple arts on the theme and I absolutely adore them. Stop pretending they can't coexist! Also, Kyle would definitely find a way with words to make König feel more at ease off duty or would handle the way König is in the field easily.

OTP

I don't actually have any preferences at all, I like everything I see with him simply because people explore different dynamics and it's the most fun part for me. BUT I'll say like what I saw from Ghoap x König less because everything I saw puts Soap into a position/dynamic I don't really enjoy that much. Doesn't mean there isn't something I'll like a lot tho!

nOTP

As always, nOTPs are not my thing, but toxic stuff upsets me.

random headcanon

Also giving you two: he loves wearing lingerie but is a little bit ashamed of it and definitely hides it and he's generally a sweet tooth, especially for chocolate, so a slice (several) of good Sachertorte will make him really happy.

unpopular opinion

Uhh... he doesn't have a huge dick?.. No one in my universe does cuz I don't see the appeal (we have huge straps in my universe tho. but toys are separate). I don't know what's popular opinion lmao, sorry.

song i associate with them

Oooh, I actually have one this time! It's from my favourite German band Oomph! - "Kleinstadtboy". I like the whole album it's from because they experimented with their sound and quite successfully in my opinon, and this one has both the lyrics (yeah it's about gayyyys but also toxic masculinity in general. fits him well I think) and the according sound. The overblown dry electronics crackling/rasping just suits him, I think. I think he smells of static electricity too.

favorite picture of them

I don't really have one? But I like him doing different finishers. Looks impressive thanks to his size.

[karlachismylife]

Soap for the character ask game plz :)

Do I really need a reason to yap about him? Nah, but I'll take it, thanks :)

If anyone else is interested, I'll be glad to talk about someone else from COD and BG3. The game itself is here if someone wants to reblog!

So. John "Soap" MacTavish.

favorite thing about them

Is "everything" a good enough answer? No? Damn. I guess I'll have to go with his passion. I can tie that to his ADHD, I can tie that to the fact that he's sunshine (and sun burns hot and flares), it doesn't matter - his emotions are bright, run hot, he's impulsive and he feels so strong. I relate to that, I also just like everything bright and flashy. His anger, his loyalty, his sense of justice, his love - they are so big and strong they cannot be contained inside his heart no matter how huge it is. This is what makes him dangerous, this is what makes him vulnerable, this is what makes him so fucking lovable to me.

least favorite thing about them

The fact that he prefers coffee over tea (source: his VA). I'm sorry, I can't stand coffee, my throat literally closes up and stops breathing if I enter some coffee-smelling space and it's not something I can control well (I tried, I swear). So the knowledge that living with Soap would involve the apartment reeking of the forbidden drink, and even worse, kissing him might taste like coffee... it's heartbreaking. I'm training that man to drink tea whether he likes it or not, coffee doesn't do anything for ADHDers anyway.

favorite line

I mean. I feel like using any of Ghoap batner here would be cheating cuz it is very much the best thing ever and also they're bouncing off each other. So I'll go with "Kids, guns and balloons. That's a new one."

It's at the start in Las Almas. I love listening to Soap in general, I love all the Scott-isms he has (even though it seems actual Scottish didn't appreciate those too much), I obviously love the funny lines he has or when he gets angry. But this one just stuck with me. Probably not because it's a Soap line, but because it's a sad line in general (and hits a little too close to home in the current situation).

But also I feel like it's kinda. The fact that I, a 22yo civilian am not actually surprised to see that "kids, guns and balloons" situation (although I am so fortunate to not be witnessing that directly), and Soap, a 26 (I think?) yo SAS Sergeant who ran off to enlist at 15-16 is. It says something about how he views the world, doesn't it? He lacks that cynicism. I've seen people say that veiwing him as a "happy go lucky" guy is incorrect, but I dunno, man. I think if someone who kills people for his job is surprised to see kids involved into crime+politics games, then he's a pretty damn optimistic lad that believes in the good in the world.

brOTP

Soap and Alejandro. There's just something so smooth, straightforward and inherently good about just two men coming to fight for what's right. Also nothing is funnier than Soap's constant cultural shock in Las Almas and Alejandro just chuckling at every silly question Johnny asks. Big brother Alejandro go go go!

OTP

Karlach x Soap for life, everything else is secondary.

nOTP

I reject the concept of nOTP, even the least likely/adhering to my tastes ships are at least interesting to explore. However, I am not a big fan of toxic relationships and such, so something like Soap x Makarov or Soap x Graves would be interesting to look at, but probably upsetting.

random headcanon

He likes the pink Orbit bubblegum, the one that comes in little stripes. His dad used to bring those at the end of the work week, sometimes unopened, sometimes with just a couple pieces left, and Soap stashed them away in his pillow case when he had the willpower not to eat them all at once. His old pillow in his childhood bedroom still smells like bubblegum.

absolutely based on my own life

unpopular opinion

I don't know what's popular to say what's unpopular. But maybe the fact that I think that Soap isn't like a total horndog 24/7? I still think he is pretty horny, more than an average person, but I also think that he's more tactile than anything and that even when he gets a random boner or just is hot and bothered, he can be satisfied with non-sexual touch. But he does not respond well to touch starvation, oh no.

song i associate with them

I am so bad at assosiating songs with characters/ships etc :( I'll be boring and repeat myself for the third time: Ren's "Loco"

favorite picture of them

That comission of him and Karlach I got, duh

But if we're talking ingame, nothing beats him being pretty and doing puppy eyes in that Milena interrogation scene. That hand reaching scene alone has me by the throat.

Thank you for asking about him!! Love youu <3

[karlachismylife]

I finally calmed down a bit and had a breakthrough with that wip I was struggling with (brain do I really need an emotional breakdown before we get any work done?)

But I am getting sleepy

And now I got jumped by like the most unhinged... well, actually, I think the image of him stabbing people with a fork was more unhinged, but anyway, my brain just generated some pretty fucking wild horny kinky scene with Soap and I'm like ??? Brain why?? I am literally about to fall asleep I'm not even horny?? And why did you make my sweet baby boy cry in that image?? I'm not even into dacryphilia????

But I guess I will write that shit because wow okay feral thoughts

I think I'll make it ghoap because I feel like it'll be too mean with x reader and I am not into that at all. But with Ghost it will be different. And that's definitely not for Karlach. Okay now I probably sleep goodnight

[karlachismylife]

A little milestone here on my blog!

Oh my god we just reached 30 subscribers??? That's INSANE to me, especially since I'm still getting the hang of writing in English AND came here with a non-existent pairing T__T I'm so beyond grateful for your interest... this isn't about numbers to me, but, like. Thirty people found my shit worthy of their time. That's a whole lot of people!!

I want to give back somehow, but I'm not sure how? I do have several Karlach x Soap WIPs at different stages of progress and also I'm thinking on that OF!AU with TF141 x reader (also something brewing in my head about the butch!reader or idk how to shorten that one yet), but I want to do something special, so I might just ask you guys, after all, this should be a celebration of your support (I can't believe it, really, this is the most love I've ever gotten on such a new page AND an obscure ship...)

So, I've seen some prompt lists I thought are nice, and I think the choice is between these four variants? I'll reblog the chosen prompt list and then y'all can request from it, it's the usual way as far as I've seen? Or I'll look into how to make this little challange even more fun. Or maybe you're not that interested, that's okay too! I can just continue with my own stuff.

[karlachismylife]

10, 18, 63 of this ask game!!! 😏🧡

Yayy hello my love! Thank you for sending in hehee sorry I'm a yapper...

10. Cltr+f "blinks" on your WIP & copy paste the first sentence/paragraph that comes up

At first I was like: oh shit I actually don't have a WIP that has text in it? (my writing process is Something Else) unless I wanted to say that Queen of the Clan is one massive WIP but posting stuff from already published chapters is no fun. But then I remembered I had something started for fem!ghoap and although no one blinks there (yet), have the closest thing here lmao

18. Do you title your fics before, during, or after the writing process? How do you come up with titles?

Most often (like with all my Love Is Illegal Celebration fics for example) it's after I finish writing, sometimes (especially if it's a big and/or multi-part one) it comes in the process. I think I only has started with a title a few times and that was because my mind came up with a beautiful phrase/good pun that unraveled into a story later.

I like naming stuff after I finish it, because it allows me to know the vibe and the details of the story - since my favourite thing to do is take a rather small detail and make a title out of it (for example, in "Flutter Into The Sky" reader is compared to a butterfly maybe once or twice, but that's the image I used to title the whole thing). My art/writing is very much about finding little images, unusual combinations, it might be less evident in my English writing, but when I write in my native language I am constantly seeking some unconventional comparisons and such, so putting them into the title is the thing for me.

But I also like puns (sorry but I'll never understand why people consider puns dumb/unfunny/stupid sort of humor, it's actually quite hard to come up with a good and original pun), hense every chapter in my hyena au (which is about spotted hyenas specifically) is named with an idiom that contains the word "spot" in it. I literally just have a list of the idioms opened and since I know what the chapter will contain, I just seek something that more or less relates to the content (like oh they'll be having lunch in that chapter - here's "a spot of lunch"). What will I do once I run out of the idioms? No idea, but I dread the day.

And finally, song lyrics/titles. It's actually something I only started doing here, on tumblr (actually, wrong, I just remembered that my biggest fic of all times is called Hoist the colours). Between the "Total Eclipse of the Heart" with Karlach x Soap coming to me in literal vision (a pun, see?) and me trying to promote some oldschool songs by naming my celebration challanges after them (cuz you know, when I celebrated 30 subs, I used a song with the number 30 in it, and so with a hundred...), I just thought I'd stick to using songs for this. So at first I wanted to name evey Love Is Illegal fic after a song with the number 100 in it, but that turned out to be too complicated, so I just started taking songs that had lyrics and/or vibes more or less suited for the stories. And of course most of the time the song needs to pass the test of "does it feel nice to read the fic while listening to it on repeat".

63. Something you hate to see in smut.

There's actually not much I hate to see in smut. Most of the time it's just things I'm not into (like, I honestly don't get dacryphilia, so if it's the main point of the fic, I'll probably just stop reading it), so I simply close it and move on. And most of the kinks I'm not into I can still read and sometimes even enjoy if written well, so there's really not much that can make me feel actual hate. When I'm reading smut in my native language, there's a big problem with uhhh words they use to avoid saying "cock" and, even worse, "pussy". I think English writers can have this problem too, but I'll be honest, the things I sometimes see in smut are like... top cringe ever. And the thing is, I can't even really blame them, because somehow writing "pussy" and "clit" and other words that are totally okay and sexy in English smut, makes for the most cringe-inducing Russian smut. They just don't match the vibe, "pussy" is kinda very much cringe, "cunt" is actually very vulgur so it's suited only for a specific style of writing/scene, "vulva" is like the one I always end up using but it's quite awkward and feels too official/medical, and "vagina" and "clit/clitoris" sound too out of place and almost medical. Of course there are ways to avoid the cringe and to write amazing smut, and I bet the reason why all the words naming fem genitalis feel so "dirty" "unsexy" and "degrading" is some deep rooted mysoginy, but it's honestly mental gymnastics every time. So while I get the struggle of people decribing "little warm caves of love" and "jade wands", maybe just don't, buddy, maybe just write "and then they FUCKED".

So yeah. If I hate anything in smut, it's when it's written real bad, all the other things make me upset, but not hateful. Like, I actually struggle when there's no love to feel between characters. And I also somehow tend to feel whether or not the author was putting in that love, I can't explain it, but I actually had this confirmed several times, so yeah, no love = no happy Juju. But not just in smut, any work without love just feels wrong and upsetting to me. But in smut it is especially important if there's degradation and such involved, cuz sorry, but I can only survive being/seeing a fave character being called a cumwhore, a cocksleeve and a useles slut if it's VERY EVIDENT that they don't actually mean it. Otherwise okay bye Imma go jump off a cliff.

I don't know how I manage to combine some unhinged fantasies and kinks with this need for love to be at core of literally everything, but I actually have seen other people so it so beautifully, so I know I'm not alone and it is possible to be a freak and a romantic.

P.S. Decided to add that I actually think that vulva is a very sexy word, but unfortunately I have only written for some very brute masculine barbarian at heart women so they would never actually use this word organically. They're more inclined to call their genitals "cunt" but since they all were fucking other women and afab people that they were deeply in love with, they couldn't call their loved ones' parts this rude word either. Smut is a struggle comrades.