#get two free bonus books plus free shipping as well.

[glassrain83]

Dear Yuletide Writer 2024

I am GlassRain on AO3, and thank you for writing for my tiny fandom(s)!

I love all these characters and any fic about them will make me happy. If you already have an idea feel free to run with it. If you want extra prompts or ideas, that’s what this is for.

(All these requests are copied from letters I've written before. I have simple tastes. I'm ready to eat two cakes.)

Yes please: gay stuff, outer space, magic. Non-con, dub-con, and mind control. Relationships where there’s a power imbalance but they also truly love each other and do the work to make it good. Relationships with size differences (not as in short human/tall human, as in human/building-sized dragon). Identity porn/any kind of reveal where the audience knows something and gets to enjoy watching the characters figure it out.

No thanks: Gore/body horror/graphic depictions of violence, embarrassment, extreme underage (teen characters having sex is fine), bodily fluids (except the usual ones for sex scenes), non-canon character death, mundane AUs.

Fandoms:

Leif & Thorn (Webcomic)

Characters: Leif, Thorn

Leif is a gardener in thrall to a mysterious debt, serving his native Sønheim at a foreign embassy. Thorn is a Knight of Ceannis who got severely burned while dragonslaying, and was rewarded with a cushy job guarding the embassy gates. Thorn doesn’t speak Leif’s language too well at first — but as they get to know each other, he finds a lot of reasons to learn.

Ongoing fantasy dramedy, with a cross-cultural romance and a great ensemble cast. (Read it here.) Leif/Thorn is canon, over a slow-burn arc that took about 5 years real-world time. They still have ongoing struggles around Leif’s control microchip, and Thorn’s effort to handle the unwanted power it gives him. Leif/Thorn/Kale is not canon yet, but the OT3 shipteasing is strong.

The prompts are Leif/Thorn-centric but I will take fic about other characters too. Other ships on the side are fine, canon or non-canon, as long as you don’t break up the main couple.

Prompts:

Canon-divergence AU where Thorn joined the Secret Order of Monster Hunters, successfully assassinated the vampires in that one early storyline, and decided to rescue/steal Leif as a bonus. What? He was in the area anyway, he might as well.

Leif/Thorn where Leif still has the microchip, but Kale has his powers and facilitates a psychic link between them, so Thorn can’t possibly miss if he tries something Leif doesn’t like. Can be established Leif/Thorn/Kale or “whoops this turned into our first threesome.”

Holiday fic where Leif and Thorn share their traditions with each other. Warmth and fluffiness a plus.

Crossover prompt: the Leif & Thorn universe has a Fantasy Eurovision Song Contest..what does Fire Saga’s act look like in a world with widespread/commonplace magic?

Doctrine of Labyrinths - Sarah Monette

Characters: Felix, Mildmay

The Doctrine of Labyrinths is a series of fantasy novels by Sarah Monette. It is set in the secondary world of Meduse and tells the story of the adventures of the wizard Felix Harrowgate and his half-brother, former assassin Mildmay the Fox.

Lush fantasy melodrama full of codependence and great hurt/comfort. I have gotten Felix/Mildmay fic before and will keep prompting more of it until the end of time (or until a TV adaptation turns this into a megafandom, whichever comes first). Gen about them is also welcome.

Prompts:

Sci-fi/cyberpunk AU. Make the hocuses into hackers, the magical curses into corrupted cybernetics, the petty thieves into data pirates. Could be the alternate version of a canon event, or a whole new SF-themed plot twist.

Missing scene from Felix and Mildmay’s journey across the continent in book 1, something where Felix has a bad turn and Mildmay successfully calms him down. Just lean all the way into the h/c in their weird-but-deep sibling bond.

Guilty frantic brothercest. (During a time in canon when they’re both mentally capable of consenting.) Especially if it’s already an ongoing situation when the story starts, so it’s not a story about how they fell into it, but about how they can’t seem to get out.

Crossover prompt: do something with Labyrinth. How would Felix and Mildmay face off against the Goblin King?

Eurovision Song Contest: The Story of Fire Saga

Characters: Sigrit

Follows the personally close Icelandic singers Lars Erickssong and Sigrit Ericksdóttir as they are given the chance to represent their country at the Eurovision Song Contest.  Ferrell, who co-wrote the script, wisely realises that this institution is beyond parody and is simply content to pay homage.

Bizarre, charming, joyful, magical (sometimes literally) tribute to Eurovision. Lars has the lifelong ambition to represent Iceland at the contest. Sigrit has the actual talent. A dozen real-world Eurovision winners have cameos. The elves in the hills have their backs.

Shipping-wise, basically I want Sigrit to be happy. For Sigrit/Lars, lean into the parts of his character that enable him to be a good boyfriend. For Sigrit/not-Lars, either give them a non-traumatic breakup, or make an AU where they were just friends the whole time.

Prompts:

The elves are back! This time, they need Sigrit’s and/or Lars’s help! You can pull the worldbuilding from real Icelandic folklore or make it up from scratch, I will be happy either way.

Instead of a song contest, the characters are thrown into a fighting-for-your-life contest. Hunger Games, Squid Game, Battle Royale etc. Our heroes survive through some combination of Sigrit’s determination and magical allies, Alexander and Mita’s loyalty and emotional support, and Lars’s power to cause unprecedented technical difficulties.

Alexander gives Lars an unexpected bi awakening. Sigrit gives Alexander an unexpected bi awakening from the other direction. What to do. What. To. Do.

Alternately, more fun scenes from Alexander and Sigrit’s growing Wholesome and Mutually Supportive Friendship. Including past the point where he trusts her enough not to hide his sexuality from her. 

Crossover prompt: the Leif & Thorn universe has a Fantasy Eurovision Song Contest..what does Fire Saga’s act look like in a world with widespread/commonplace magic?

[akatsuki-shin]

I... I don’t often call out anyone specifically using social media before, but... I saw this among the reblogs in my first post about MXTX novels English release announcement and I feel that this is just too much...

I’m not going to tag this with the fandom tags because this is literally just my personal rant, and I don’t want unpleasant things to appear when people are happily browsing the tags.

I also censored the person’s blog name. It’s not like I want people to mass attack them.

But I do have some things I want to say about this kind of mindset.

And this is gonna be a long post, so I’ll cut it with "Read More” later below as not to disturb anyone’s browsing experience.

Why do they have to split the books into multiple volumes?

First, you do realize that the original Chinese version and other languages versions are also in multiple volumes that don’t always be published on the same date, right?

SVSSS has 3 volumes, MDZS has 4 volumes, TGCF has 5 volumes.

With the English release, both SVSSS and MDZS get +1 volume while TGCF gets +3 volumes.

Why you ask?

Have you ever considered how long a single Chinese word would be if written in alphabets?

The word “人” in Chinese only needs 1 (one) character, while in English it would translate to “P E O P L E” = 5 (five) characters.

The word “知己” in Chinese only needs 2 (two) characters, while in English it would translate to “C O N F I D A N T E” = 10 characters, or “S O U L M A T E” = 8 characters.

Now apply this to an entire novel. FYI, TGCF has more than 1 million word count in Chinese, so you can do the math by yourself.

I mean, just go watch the donghua or live action in YouTube. One single sentence in the Chinese sub is often translated to two or more lines in the English subtitle.

And have I mentioned that the English release will have:

Glossary

Footnotes

Character Guides

And I’m going to repeat this once again: In China and other countries that already get their official releases, it is also NOT always all released on the same date as a single set/box.

So yes, (not) surprise! For the Chinese release and official releases in other countries, you also often need to purchase multiple times, pay shipping fee multiple times, and wait for certain period of times until all volumes are released.

It doesn’t only happen to MXTX novels, it happens to almost all novels, be it danmei or not.

Why don’t they just wait for translations to finish and release it all at the same time/as a box set? Why the span of two years?

On my part, I already say above that in China and other countries that already get their official release, it’s also not always published all on the same date.

Other than that, I’m not an expert at book publishing, much less when the publisher is not from my own country. But maybe consider the following:

They’re releasing 3 (three) hugely popular IPs all at the same time. Maybe the preparations take more time and effort to ensure everything is flawless?

Since it is very rare (or maybe never, cmiiw) for danmei novels to be published in English, maybe the publisher is testing the market first? Because if they already release them as a huge bundle from the start and it somehow flops, the loss would be very big. If it works well, then good! Maybe for future danmei release, they will consider making a box set or releasing them within shorter timeframe. 

In terms of marketing, if they wait another 2 years to release it all at once, will the momentum still be there? You can say “so in the end it’s all about money”, but if not sales number and money, what else should the publisher expect to receive for their work? They’re already putting a lot of effort buying all three IPs from the Chinese publishers, proofread or even translate some from scratch, pay translators, editors, illustrators, printing companies, etc. If it’s not selling well simply because they release it at the wrong time, aren’t all these efforts going to be wasted? And you can bet there will be no more danmei published in English if their first try already flops merely because of losing the momentum.

Are there any other rules or regulations they need to comply that prevents them from releasing everything in one go? But once again, even in China and other countries, it is also not always all released in one go, so this argument is already invalid from the start.

But they make it so expensive like this!

I’m sorry to break it to you, but I’ve compared the prices to MDZS Japanese release + TGCF Thai release and... The price isn’t really that much different.

Btw, I’m using Google’s currency converter, in case anyone wants to know where does my calculation comes from.

Okay, so here’s MDZS Japanese version from CD Japan:

One volume of MDZS Regular ver. cost 1760 yen. This is 15,96 USD before shipping. There’s only like $4 difference.

There’s also the Exclusive ver. that cost 3660 yen (32,92 USD) but we’re not gonna talk about that because they’re basically making you pay for the bonus, which is some acrylic panels and illustration cards.

Now here’s TGCF Thai version from Sense Book:

Translation using Google Chrome page translate:

One volume of TGCF costs 360 baht. This is 10.77 USD before shipping. So there’s about $9.22 difference.

Again, notice the difference of word/sentence length in the Thai words and English alphabet.

"But there’s still difference in price and other releases usually gets merchandise!” - Correct me if I’m wrong, but the US is probably one of the most expensive countries in the world. Do you think the materials, printings, and manpower cost is the same with other countries? Especially compared to one in Southeast Asia.

“But it’s xxxx times more expensive than the original Chinese version!” - Excuse me, the original Chinese version doesn’t need to pay for translators, proofreaders and editors with multilingual skills, and purchase the IPs? If you think it’s more worth buying the Chinese version, then by all means go ahead.

------------

Some last words...

I’m not looking down on those in difficult financial situation, but hey, I’m not filthy rich either? I come from a third world country and even if I’m a working adult, I’m still in working middle class + I got my parents to take care of. My country’s currency is literally just a tiny 0.000069 USD per 1 Indonesian Rupiah.

Every single fandom merchandise that you see me bought, either I’ve saved up for that or I sacrificed other things to buy that. I just don’t show the struggle to you guys because why should I? I’m just here to have fun about the fandom I love, not to flex my struggling financial condition.

These official English release of MXTX novels? All 17 books are going to cost me almost HALF of my monthly salary. But hey, I think it’s a good thing that they didn’t release it all at once, so that I can save up between months to purchase them all and plan my spending better.

If you feel the price is expensive, especially if you have to ship from outside North America, consider the following:

Book Depository provide free worldwide shipping

The books’ ISBN numbers are all available in the publisher’s website, just show it to you local bookstore and ask if they can order it for you

Plus, there are already hundreds of generous fans doing free giveaways in Twitter, even the publishers are helping to signal boost this. You can go and try your luck if you’re really desperate.

Lastly, I know how much love we all have for our favorite fandoms, but remember that fandom merchandise is NOT your primary needs.

You are NOT obliged to purchase any fandom merchandise if you can’t afford it and you should ALWAYS prioritize your primary needs.

Also, if you still want to read the fan-translations that are still available, alright go ahead. But remember that the translators themselves already said fan translations in English are now illegal. You can read it. We all consume pirated contents at one point. But don’t flex about it and diss the official release just because you can’t afford it.

I don’t know if the person who made that reblog tags are going to come at me or not, but even if they do, I literally don’t care. I’m not gonna waste my time arguing with someone with that kind of mindset and will block them right on the spot.

Also Idgaf if they call me out or talk behind my back, I literally don’t know them, so I don’t care.

End of rant.

[princessofmerchants]

what’s the firebird fairytale retelling

Image Details: "BILIBIN, Ivan [Ива́н Я́ковлевич Били́бин] (1876-1942). 🇷🇺 Ivan Tsaryevich-Grey Wolf-Firebird, 1899." by Halloween HJB is marked with CC0 1.0

Hello! The Firebird is a figure in Slavic / Russian folklore, and there are many translations and versions of a story that features this character. Many of them also feature a character named Ivan, and the famous ballet retelling of it includes the evil sorcerer Koschei as the antagonist who has captured thirteen princesses, and the Firebird helps Ivan free them by defeating Koschei.

I am not an expert on all versions, but I read a novel retelling of the story, Firebird by Mercedes Lackey, many years back and the version of the story she draws on has Ivan (in her story, called Ilya) as a maligned youngest brother of many brothers who are all bullies to him for his interactions with the Firebird, before he sets off on the adventure that brings him to the realm of Koschei.

But if I were to guess, if SJM draws from any version it will be The Firebird ballet by Stravinsky. I will grab a few quotes from that Wikipedia page that summarize the ballet's story and bold the details that map to what we know about Vassa and Koschei, from Elain's seer visions and from Vassa’s own words about Koschei in ACOWAR:

The ballet centers on the journey of its hero, Prince Ivan. While hunting in the forest, he strays into the magical realm of the evil Koschei the Immortal, whose immortality is preserved by keeping his soul in a magic egg hidden in a casket. Ivan chases and captures the Firebird and is about to kill her; she begs for her life, and he spares her. As a token of thanks, she offers him an enchanted feather that he can use to summon her should he be in dire need.

Prince Ivan then meets thirteen princesses who are under the spell of Koschei and falls in love with one of them.

Then later:

Exhausted, the creatures and Koschei then fall into a deep sleep. While they sleep, the Firebird directs Ivan to a tree stump where the casket with the egg containing Koschei's soul is hidden. Ivan destroys the egg, and with the spell broken and Koschei dead, the magical creatures that Koschei held captive are freed and the palace disappears. All of the "real" beings, including the princesses, awaken ...

I don't believe SJM will do a literal retelling but instead, similar to what she did with Beauty and the Beast and the legend of Tam Lin in ACOTAR (the first book), draw on elements from the source material but combine it with her own world building to tell us a new version. The only players I feel sure would play a role in a retelling of this in the ACOTAR universe are Lucien (Ivan/Ilya), Vassa (the Firebird), and Koschei (Koschei). 

More thoughts after the break that contain ACOSF SPOILERS about my ideas for what could happen in future books, given the above lore I think SJM is drawing on.

What I would LOVE is, if Lucien goes on an adventure to Koschei's lake on the continent to face Koschei in order to free Vassa, that Elain would join him, perhaps from two motivations: 

1) To offer her seer powers in aid of this mission that would track back to the wider plot conflict already set up, with the remaining human queens, Fae wanting to land grab in the human realms (e.g., Beron), the Trove, and of course, Koschei; and, 2) Perhaps, as a way to finally face her mating bond with Lucien, not necessarily to accept it immediately, but if they travel together to help the wider conflict, they could test the bond together and see if this is something they both want to choose or not (and Lucien would absolutely go for this because, even though the chance of a rejection lays at the end of the journey, he wants to figure this out as much as she does)....then cue an Elucien love story that is layered into the Firebird retelling ☺️

And yes, I just showed my Elucien cards, but this theory of how their book could go technically allows for either outcome. But whether Elain is involved as I am speculating here, or less so, I honestly believe Lucien will be the one to travel to the continent to face Koschei to free Vassa from her curse, and free the other girls Koschei has trapped in the process. 

This single line in ACOSF, ch. 7, bolded at the end of the political discussion about Koschei, is SJM telling us almost as literally as she can from the middle of the narrative, that this is what is coming, and I adore SJM for putting this in there, easing my Lucien, Firebird-loving heart that my hopes for this plotline are well founded:

“Certainly.” Vassa peered at her hands, fingers flexing. “I fear what may happen if he ever gets free of the lake. If he sees this world on the cusp of disaster and knows he could strike, and strike hard, and make himself its master. As he once tried to do, long ago.”

“Those are legends that predate our courts,” Eris said.

Vassa nodded. “It is all I have gleaned from my time enslaved to him.”

Lucien stared out the window—as if he could see the lake across a sea and a continent. As if he were setting his target.

I always hoped this would be the next full length novel after Nessian's, but now I'm thinking it might be the last one because it would end with Koschei's demise, and he seems to be the big baddie for this trio of novels, of which ACOSF was the first. 

Plus the Az POV bonus chapter makes me think SJM is setting us up for him being a main character in the next book, which makes me think we're finally going to get the Az / Mor situation resolved, and that they both find partners (in Gwyn and Emerie 👀 showing more ship cards, sorry not sorry!) once they talk out 500 years of tension and pain. 

So the Firebird retelling may get punted one more book, which in my head means Elain's story is held off for another book as well... though Elriel shippers might see her playing a main role in an Az novel, and thus the debates continue until we know more ☺️ (she says cheerfully - no anti hate here please!).

I hope this answers your question about the Firebird fairytale and how I see it playing a role in a future book! Apologies for also weaving in my ship theories and predictions. ☺️ But IMO Lucien freeing Vassa from Koschei does not depend on any ship being endgame, and I am ready for SJM's creativity to shine as she (hopefully!) retells this story for us!

[foulcollectorbasementfan]

REVIEW OF "THE EX FACTOR GUIDE" BY BRAD BROWNING

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FULL REVIEW: When I first stumbled across Brad Browning's new "Ex Factor Guide" program, I thought it would probably be like all the rest of the 'ex back' products for sale on the internet. Boy, was I wrong!

First of all, "The Ex Factor Guide" is easily the most thorough and comprehensive guide ever written on the subject. It leaves no stones unturned: you may think that your situation is unique, and that any book on the topic can't possibly address the issues you're facing. Well, with "The Ex Factor Guide", that's definitely not the case! Brad has covered every possible scenario and "what if," meaning that by the time you've finished reading the program, your questions are almost certain to have been answered in depth.

Not only is it the most comprehensive program, it's also the only guide we're found that actually provides hundreds of real-world examples on how to apply Brad's techniques. Brad's chapter on text messages, for example, offers dozens of canned text messages you can send to your ex that are almost guaranteed to get a response!

Perhaps most importantly, it's very clear that the sneaky psychological techniques recommended by Brad in "The Ex Factor Guide" have been researched and tested by couples in the real world. Brad Browning is a certified relationship counselor, and his decades of experience working with couples to repair broken relationships is clearly evident throughout the book. He offers dozens of unique and ground-breaking ideas that I've never read anywhere else.

Brad claims that over 90% of all relationships can be salvaged, and while that may sound unreasonably high, I actually tend to think he's being completely honest. It's no stretch to imagine that, as he states on his website, anyone who reads and applies his techniques is almost guaranteed to have their ex begging for a second chance.

What about the program itself? The core of the program is a 125 page e-book, professionally written & presented in PDF format. There's also an audio version and a cool video course also included in the price, plus two excellent bonus e-books that cover various topics not addressed in the main e-book.

The best part? It's all available *instantly* from Brad's website... there's no shipping fees and no waiting around for the mailman, because you can download the entire program within 2 mintues of ordering. That's great news, considering that when you're trying to get your ex back, time is of the essence!

If you're ready to get instant access to all of Brad's sneaky psychological tips and techniques, head over to his website and watch the free video presentation now. Trust me, you won't regret it.

[itmeansofthesea]

Moving Day

Well this one got me all in my feelings. This was supposed to be lighter and funnier and somehow it got away from me. Instead it's this beautiful thing?? Maybe I'll try to write a funnier version later, but thanks to @dobega for reminding me of the domesticity conversation that led to the end. Any longer and I would have to make this a series, but if that's something you're interested in I think I could swing it. Enjoy, y'all.

Warnings: like one curse word? I think that's it... It's also overwhelmingly sweet imo so just be ready for that.

Had Charles Vane known that becoming ally/friends with James Flint would involve helping him, his boyfriend, and his boyfriend’s wife (his girlfriend?) move into their new house, he might have just gone ahead, taken the warship and let Peter Ashe hang Flint and be done with. Not really, but… maybe?

He honestly isn’t even really sure how he got roped into this. It was a couple of weeks ago when he, Jack, Anne, Max, Flint, Thomas, and Miranda were all sitting at a table upstairs in the brothel having dinner. Billy was out showing Abigail around Nassau and Mr.s Gates and De Groot were just trying to get a moment’s peace at some smaller tavern at the other end of town. Silver and Madi were out having some sort of alone dinner thing (Jack had called it a “date” and then called Charles a “heathen with no sense of romance”), and this all left the motley crew to sit around with whatever the brothel’s cook had dreamed up and a metric ton of ale to wash it down.

Charles didn’t fully understand the situation Flint had with the Hamiltons, but whatever it was clearly made Flint happier than Charles had ever seen him. He was all smiles and laughter and joy. It warmed Charles’s heart (just a bit) to see his friend so happy, because they certainly had become friends. He mentally joked about leaving Flint to hang, but to be honest it would be difficult to imagine his life without the people sitting around the table with him now. At least, it would be difficult to imagine something resembling a happy life.

They’d stopped to refuel in Savannah after Charlestown and somehow or another word got to Flint about a plantation full of the disgraced sons of London’s elite that were now more or less enslaved in the prison colony. If there was one thing Charles was always down to do (and there were many things he was always down to do), it was hunt down a slave master and free people from bondage. They’d split when they got to the plantation- Charles after the master of the house and James off to find Thomas. Finding Mr. Smith hadn’t been difficult and dispatching him was even easier. Once that was finished, Charles made his way outside to find Flint in the arms of another, taller man and both of them appeared to be weeping. He felt like an intruder watching them, so he busied himself with checking the plantation for anyone else who may need to be released. When they made it back to the ship, Miranda leapt on the man who Charles realized must be Thomas, and after a minute of holding on to him she grabbed Flint into their embrace.

In time all of the introductions were made, and suddenly the Charles/Anne/Jack crew expanded to the Charles/Anne/Max/Jack crew and the Charles/James friendship expanded to include Charles/James/Thomas/Miranda. They also intercepted Abigail Ashe on the way, and James and the Hamiltons promptly adopted her on the spot. She and Charles had some reacquainting to do outside of Eleanor Guthrie’s influence, but he at least thought they were making progress. She didn’t seem nearly as terrified as she’d been of him when she followed Eleanor through the gate, so that was something.

Fast forward a few weeks and here they all were finishing their chicken and ale when Jack began asking about where the Flint/Hamilton/Ashe family intended to live. Miranda’s house was too small now that they had Abigail, and Billy had attached himself to Abigail as an older brother figure so usually where one of them was, the both of them were. Of course with Billy came Mr. Gates as his surrogate father, and while they’d made it work for the last couple of months, everyone was feeling a bit cramped.

Jack and Max volunteered to host them at the brothel, but they politely declined. Charles half considered offering to let them stay at the fort, but figured that may not be the best idea considering they also had Abigail to consider. Not that he couldn’t keep his men under control, but he also knew that she had memories of that fort that she may not want to be surrounded by all the time. He certainly knew that was the case for him, and yet he stayed… for some reason. Maybe he should take Jack up on the offer to move into the brothel…

Thomas mentioned that they’d been asking around and found a house a bit more inland from Miranda’s that had been abandoned for the last several years. It would take a bit of fixing up, but they planned to go ahead and move in and then work on it as they lived there. Before Charles fully knew what was happening, Jack had volunteered Charles, Anne, himself, and Max to all help them move with the added bonus that he and Max would help with the decorating if Miranda so desired their assistance. Max enthusiastically agreed and elbowed Anne in the side prompting her to shrug a shoulder in agreement. Jack looked at Charles with those wide puppy-dog eyes and before Charles even knew what he was saying he’d agreed to help. The look on the Flint/Hamilton’s faces almost made it worth it.

At the time.

That was then.

Now it’s moving day. What on earth had they gotten themselves into?

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

When Charles and company arrived at Miranda’s house early the next day, one cart was packed and Thomas, Billy, and James were in the process of loading another one. It was decided that they would stay behind and the Ranger crew plus Max would go with Miranda and Abigail and get things unloaded. Mr. Gates was out helping Mr. De Groot careen the ship again since the last time was a bit of a disaster.

The moving crew pulled up to a slightly rundown looking two story house with columns on the porch and an overgrown garden to the side. Miranda smiled and squeezed Abigail around the shoulders before jumping off the cart to start unloading. Abigail took the key to the front door and unlocked it, but had a little trouble pushing it open since the summer heat made the wood swell in the jamb. Jack went to help her push it open while Charles and the others started getting things off the cart.

“Just put everything in the front for now, we’ll get it sorted later,” Miranda instructed as she pulled a crate of books from the back. She passed it to Charles who noticed the copy of Reflections by Marcus Aurelius on the top. He recognized it from a conversation he’d had with Flint on the way to the plantation. That was his and Thomas’s book, the one object that kept them tethered together to all this time. Flint’s book with Miranda was Don Quixote, which he also noticed on top of the stack. It’s not that Charles couldn’t read (Teach made sure he could), it had just never been particularly useful to him. You don’t have to know how to read to split logs, haul rope, navigate the stars, or fight the English Navy. Besides, he’d never really had the time to sit down and rest long enough to read. Maybe he should change that. He set the books down to the left of the open door and went back out for more stuff.

Max and Anne pulled down a trunk of clothes and carried it into the house together. Charles volunteered to switch with them, but he was told in no uncertain terms that they could handle it themselves thank you very much, so he left them to it. He passed Miranda and Abigail carrying small crates of what appeared to be dishes. Porcelain. Hadn’t he and Flint had that conversation just a few days ago? About how fragile porcelain and books were, and how fragile a civilized life was, and how it all came down to capitulation and letting society numb you into obedience? Now he was willingly helping Flint settle into that obedience. Is that something a real friend should do? Charles wasn’t sure, so he jumped into the back of the cart, pushed a trunk to the edge, and hauled it out of the back of the cart to take inside.

Miranda stood in the foyer with her hands on her hips trying to put together what each room should be when the furniture arrived. Charles motioned to the trunks on the floor and at Jack who was just standing there in slack jawed awe.

“Would you like us to move these upstairs?”

Miranda turned and smiled up at him. “Sure, thank you, Charles.”

“Jack, let’s go.” Charles barked and jerked his head toward the trunks.

“You can’t honestly expect me to be able to help you carry that upstairs.” Jack raised an eyebrow and looked at Charles like he’d lost his mind. Charles scowled and opened his mouth to reply when suddenly-

“Good thing we got here in time then,” Flint’s voice sounded amused coming from behind him, and he turned just in time to see Billy and Thomas carrying in a table. Miranda’s smile widened as she directed them to the right and Flint walked over to Charles to help with the trunk.

“My hero,” Jack cooed jokingly at Flint before catching Charles’s eye and backing away. “Yes, yes, I know. Fuck you, Jack. I’ll let you save your breath.” Jack raised his hands and walked away to follow Miranda and see if he could start setting the table or something.

Charles just rolled his eyes and grabbed his end of the trunk.

“On 3?” James asked. Charles nodded. “1, 2, 3,” James counted off and they both lifted at the same time. It was heavy, even for the two of them.

“The fuck’s in this thing?” Charles grunted as he started backwards up the stairs.

“I think these are Abigail’s… From what I understand, women’s clothes are far more complex than ours,” James laughed.

“Not here, they aren’t…” Charles thought back to Eleanor’s outfits, but also realized that Abigail and Miranda were nothing like Eleanor, therefore they would likely be dressed more like Max, in which case it made sense. Thank God they weren’t like Eleanor. Nassau couldn’t handle another one.

“So, if you can’t understand why a man would want domesticity, why are you helping four of them move into a house?” James looked amused, and Charles honestly wasn’t even sure he had an answer.

“I still don’t understand it. To the left,” Charles moved to get his back to the doorway and James moved with him. “However,” they set the trunk down inside the room and straightened. “I think I am starting to understand wanting peace.” He sighed. “And I don’t know, maybe I do understand it. I tried to tell Eleanor that we could take part of the gold and settle down, have a life, a couple of kids… but she would never have that. I told myself that wasn’t me wanting domesticity, that was wanting someone else to depend on me, but…” he took a deep breath and walked out onto the landing where he could see Jack and Anne below him. James wordlessly followed. “Maybe I’ve had other people depending on me for a long time. Actually, I know I have. It’s why Jack wouldn’t come with me when I left with Teach- he didn’t want to have to depend on me when he’d built something of his own here. I didn’t expect that to hurt as much as it did.”

“But it did,” James whispered beside him.

“It did. I guess because I was hoping that our friendship would be enough for him to come with me, but in the end his need for independence won out. I can’t blame him, especially after all the shit I put him through with Eleanor-”

“Excuse you, you both put us all through that,” James smirked and bumped Charles’s shoulder. He earned a grunt in response. James just chuckled and noted the small grin gracing Charles’s face out of the corner of his eye. James knew at one point that comment would likely have resulted at him having a knife in his face. He was thankful they’d progressed past that.

“Anyway,” Charles emphasized the word, “seeing you with Miranda and Thomas, and even adopting Abigail. It seems peaceful. Maybe that’s part of domesticity, maybe it isn’t, but either way, it looks nice. It’s not something I can have in that fort probably, but…” he trailed off.

James waited a beat before asking, “what?”

“I am happy that it’s working out this way for you,” Charles whispered. “If anyone deserves all of this, you do. You all do,” he ignored the water welling up in his eyes as he put a hand over Flint’s over the railing.

Flint didn’t even bother ignoring his tears. He just let them go as he watched his family make their home together for the first time in a way that included all of them from the very beginning. He whispered, “thank you. So do you, you know?”

Charles chuckled humorlessly and swiped a hand across his face.

“I’m serious,” James looked at Charles who turned his head in response. “They are my family, but you are now, too. You don’t show up to save my life from the man who ruined my life, help me blow a port city to hell, kill its governor, and then stop me from murdering Jack Rackham for taking the Urca gold I’d been after for years without earning the title of brother. Even if you did steal my ship first.” James smirked and bumped Charles’s shoulder again.

“Yeah… I’m not sorry about that.” Charles shook his head and laughed.

“Wouldn’t expect you to be,” James chuckled, “brother.”

Charles looked at his family and back at James. “Brother.”

[terramythos]

TerraMythos 2021 Reading Challenge - Book 23 of 26

Title: Stories of the Raksura, Volume Two (2015)

Author: Martha Wells

Genre/Tags: Fantasy, Adventure, Short Story Collection, Third-Person, LGBT Protagonist, Female Protagonist

Rating: 8/10 (note: this is an average)

Date Began: 8/30/2021

Date Finished: 9/8/2021

Stories of the Raksura, Volume Two is the second of two short story/novella collections that take place in the Books of the Raksura universe. As before, I recommend reading the original trilogy if you’re interested in this series— otherwise you will be pretty confused. You can check out my review of The Cloud Roads here. 

Of the two novellas and three short stories in this volume, my favorites were “The Dead City” and “The Dark Earth Below”, both of which got a 9/10 from me.

Individual ratings, content warnings, and minor series spoilers below the cut.

Content warnings for the book: Suicidal ideation, graphic violence, gore, death, parental disownment, childbirth.  

#1 - The Dead City (9/10)

Fleeing from the ruins of Saraseil, Moon attempts to process his trauma. After wandering aimlessly, he stumbles upon a small village troubled by a rash of strange disappearances. Moon resolves to uncover a mysterious threat and save the locals— but he must hide his true identity lest they turn on him.

He was tired of looking at dead groundlings, tired of feeling sorry for them. The Fell had hunted them through the streets of Saraseil, dug through the walls of their houses. There was a raw lump of emotion in his chest, boiling and expanding until it felt as if it was going to burst through his scales.

He wanted to make somebody else feel sorry.

This story really clicked with me; it’s more emotionally intense than many stories in this series. It’s also one of the few glimpses we get of Moon before discovering the Raksura, and the difference between this painfully lonely version of him and the version we get throughout the series is quite striking. Things gets better, Moon, I swear! The prose is also on point and very entertaining to read. I found the monsters in this story pretty creepy; basically a Three Worlds take on zombies.

Even so, I had trouble understanding why I liked this story so much, but then I realized— it’s a freaking Murderbot plot. Hyper competent, emotionally stunted loner stumbles upon a bunch of strangers in need, and decides they must help said strangers without being able to articulate why… all while hiding their secret identity. Cue a bunch of badass action scenes spliced together with emotionally charged self-reflection. This is in no way a criticism, because I LOVE that plot, and it’s kind of funny to see a Murderbot prototype in the Raksura universe.

#2 - Mimesis (8/10)

Jade is on a diplomatic mission with a small contingent of warriors. When one of the younger ones disappears, she searches the nearby forest to find him. But she soon discovers much more than she bargained for.  

Of course, the lesson might be that instead of the court losing one warrior it was about to lose a warrior and a sister queen, just because Jade didn’t want to look like a coward. And maybe a predator’s burrow wasn’t a good place for an inner debate about responsibility and leadership.

This is a very short story, about the length of a standard chapter. But I did enjoy it; it’s nice to have a story from Jade’s POV. The monster here is maybe the creepiest one in the series? I like how its whole deal ties into the title. Other than that, not a whole lot to say about this one.

#3 - Trading Lesson (7/10)

A group of wandering traders visit the Indigo Cloud colony tree. Moon notices one attempting to swindle a Raksura, and promptly puts a stop to it.

Moon’s attempt to appear innocent and only mildly interested was clearly failing, so he said, “I like amber fine. I don’t like traders that take advantage of people.” Iglen wasn’t obligated to play fairly. But Moon wasn’t obligated to let him get away with it, either.

If “Mimesis” seemed short, this one is really only a few pages long. It’s basically a slice-of-life scene at Indigo Cloud. It’s some fun bonus content if you want to see a fragment of daily life among the Raksura, but not much else.

#4 - The Almost Last Voyage of the Wind-Ship Escarpment (8/10)

Jai is the captain of a small wind-ship with a tight-knit crew. Their newest member is a young man named Flaren, recently disowned and left for dead by his family. Jai feels an especially strong kinship with him— but when Flaren’s father offers her crew a job to deliver ransom in an active hostage situation, Flaren sees it as an opportunity to regain favor with his family.

Not only would they be rescuing people who were badly in need of rescuing, stuck-up Issilan nobles though they were, but the rest of the payment Canon Hain had promised was so large they couldn’t afford to pass it up. “The pirates want their ransom, we want their hostages and our payment for freeing them. If it goes well, everyone gets what they want.”

Everyone nodded, reassured, and Jai felt the tension ease. Then Shiri had to say darkly, “You hope that’s all they want.”

Honestly, I’ve always wanted to see a story that takes place in the Three Worlds, but doesn’t have anything to do with the Raksura. This is one such story, and I found it entertaining! I liked the themes of found family— specifically that love shouldn’t be conditional. It’s a cute story with some good action scenes.

#5 - The Dark Earth Below (9/10)

Jade is pregnant and close to giving birth, sending Moon into an anxious spiral. At the worst possible time, the Indigo Cloud colony finds itself the target of trouble. A small party of groundling explorers are found poisoned and near death along the forest floor. Moon finds both himself and the colony stalked by an invisible threat; but figuring out what it is and what it wants proves to be a challenge.

Stone growled and rubbed his face in frustration. Moon sympathized. He added, “I know, this doesn’t make sense.”

“It makes sense,” Stone countered. “We just don’t know why yet.”

This novella is the longest story in this collection; roughly half the book. “The Dark Earth Below” feels different than many Raksura stories. It’s a mix of domestic everyday life and a tense suspense plot. These might seem contradictory, but it totally works. It’s nice to see Moon and Jade interact as a bickering couple, a dimension of their relationship we don’t see much of in the main series. There’s some major catharsis seeing Moon at a point where he’s finally happy, a far cry from his character in “The Dead City”. At the same time, the suspense story (plus creepy monster; a running theme of this collection) is gripping. There’s something about an invisible threat stalking the main characters that really gets to me— and its final reveal sure is something.

Closing Thoughts

I ended up liking this collection a little more than the first one! These anthologies are great for anyone looking for more Raksura content after reading the main series. But I can’t recommend them if you’re not already familiar with at least the original trilogy. If you do end up reading the Raksura books, let me know what you think!

[minnarr]

Don’t Talk to Me About Naboo’s Moons

Last month, I had a little too much time on my hands when I ran out of things to do at work, so I made a Powerpoint. I did not expect to have 20 slides worth of yelling about Naboo’s moons, but here we are.

[ID: PowerPoint slide. The title, in big letters, reads “Don’t Talk to Me About Naboo’s Moons.” In smaller letters, the subtitle: “(Star Wars Writers Sure Didn’t Talk to Each Other About Them, Either)”. /end ID]

And now I’m adapting it to a Tumblr post, because why not.

How many moons does Naboo have?

I'm glad you asked

Three

Inside the Worlds of STAR WARS Episode I (2000) stated that they had one moon, and from TPM footage it’s hard to claim for certain there’s any more than that. Apparently taking their cue from Secrets of Naboo, a supplement to the WOTC Star Wars RPG, later sources have run with three moons

Source: https://www.theforce.net/swtc/orbs.html#naboo

Thrawn: Alliances (2018) compares another system’s moons with Naboo’s: “They were small moons, smaller than any of Naboo’s three…” (Ch. 15)

Nexus of Power (supplement to the Star Wars Force and Destiny Roleplaying Game) says Naboo has “three small moons”

[ID: Moonlight over Theed, The Phantom Menace. One obvious moon shines in the sky over Theed palace. Another bright object in the sky may also be a moon. /end ID]

[ID: Amidala’s starship passes a moon of Naboo, The Phantom Menace. The moon in question is tan and barren-looking. /end ID]

So, we have designations for three or fewer moons, right?

Wrong

There's five candidates: Ohma-D'un, Onoam, Rori, Veruna, and a “nameless mass”

Sources and Canon in Star Wars

Before we go on, let’s look at how we get information about the Star Wars universe, and how I select from contradictory information. If you’re familiar, obviously, feel free to skip ahead to the next section. The imaginary audience for the PowerPoint might not have been.

The old EU passes into Legends

On April 25, 2014, in the leadup to The Force Awakens, Lucasfilm announced that all previous Expanded Universe material would now be published under the Legends banner. All six previous movies plus The Clone Wars series “are the immovable objects of Star Wars history, the characters and events to which all other tales must align.” Novels, comics, and other expanded universe material published after the changeover to Legends is now known as New Canon (or Disney Canon).

Every fan ultimately comes to their own arrangement with what they consider canon — which pieces of New Canon and Legends they stitch together to come to a satisfying understanding of the Star Wars universe.

Canon status of roleplaying game materials

The canon policy of Wookieepedia is fascinating and I have not even scratched the surface, but the section on roleplaying games makes for especially convoluted reading. Both the West End Games and Wizards of the Coast licenses for RPGs ended before the Legends changeover; these are firmly Legends. 

Fantasy Flight Games, however, gained the license to card, board, and roleplaying games in 2011, just three years before the switch to New Canon. Lucasfilm Story Group has made no public stance on whether their material is canon. 

For this reason and because their publishing time for the RPG sourcebooks stretches before and after the changeover, Wookieepedia has gone case-by-case and selected which books apply to Legends, Canon, or both for article-writing purposes.

Mainstream solutions to the three-moon problem

[ID: A quote from Nexus of Power: “Three small moons - Ohma-D’un, Rori, and a nameless mass that is little more than an overgrown asteroid - house small colonies as well as a handful of offworld and orbital shipyard and factories.” /end iD]

Nexus of Power is an FFG sourcebook that was determined by Wookieepedia’s standards to apply to Canon as well as Legends articles. Its entry on Naboo, however, differs from the later sourcebook Rise of the Separatists, which Wookieepedia deems canon and cites in its selection of moons. 

The Rise of the Separatists entry reads:

Three moons—Ohma-D’un, Rori, and Veruna—orbit Naboo. They host small colonies with shipyards, orbital dockyards, and factories.

So even within one publishing license and one context, different moons have been attributed to Naboo.

Wookieepedia

Wookieepedia’s Canon page for Naboo lists Ohma-D’un, Onoam, and Veruna. Each of these comes from a different source:

Ohma-D’un cites Rise of the Separatists

Onoam cites Leia, Princess of Alderaan

Veruna cites Star Wars: The Visual Encyclopedia

They’ve made a choice—but it’s definitely not the only plausible choice. Each of the four names we’re given for Naboo’s moons has at least some backing in New Canon.

Onoam

Onoam is the only moon on this list that is fully and non-dubiously canonical, as Leia spent some time there in the 2017 novel Leia, Princess of Alderaan. It is, however, the funniest name choice: someone recently pointed out to me that it’s just an anagram of “a moon”

I love this, but Claudia Gray sure muddied the Naboo Moon Name Waters by making this the only choice it is impossible to reject. No shade, though. I loved the LPOA Naboo crumbs.

Onoam has both mines (plagued in the Imperial era by corrupt leadership and miner safety issues) and luxury housing. Before his assassination, Moff Quarsh Panaka resided in a chalet on Onoam, and Queen Dalné had a home there.

Sidebar: The Mining Moons

When discussing the assassination attempt on Padmé in Attack of the Clones, Mace Windu says, “Our intelligence points to disgruntled spice miners on the moons of Naboo.”

Leia, Princess of Alderaan establishes that Onoam was one of these moons; it mentions strikes and minor political violence a generation before Leia’s. It also establishes that Onoam is mined for medicinal spice, which by law can only be mined by humans, not droids

In Queen’s Shadow, which takes place in 28 BBY, the mining moons “struggle to maintain the balance between the rule of Naboo and their allegiance to filling their quotas”; the mining jobs are much less lucrative than farming on Karlinus

Veruna

[ID: a rather barren, tan-colored moon /end ID]

Star Wars: The Visual Encyclopedia (2017) identifies the moon pictured above as Veruna. The same moon was identified as Ohma-D’un by The Complete Star Wars Encyclopedia (2008), according to Wookieepedia. I have access to neither, but it looks like the moon the ship passed in TPM. For being one of Wookiee’s choices, the evidence for this name is astonishingly thin, but the same can be said of some of the others

Sidebar: King Veruna and his moon

The likelihood is that Veruna (the moon) was named for Ars Veruna, Padmé’s predecessor as Naboo’s monarch in Legends novels Darth Plagueis (2012) and Cloak of Deception (2001)

It is very probable that Veruna is no longer canon, and it is certainly impossible that he served a decade-plus term that ended shortly before Padmé’s reign:

Padmé’s immediate predecessor, according to Queen’s Peril (2020), was Queen Sanandrassa

Sometime during Eirtaé’s childhood, Réillata served a single two-year term, according to Queen’s Shadow (2019)

Even if he’s placed somewhere before Sanandrassa, there’s not really room for him to have reigned that long unless there are two monarchs between him and Padmé 

Rori

Rori was named and fleshed out in the 2003 game Star Wars Galaxies, which is now Legends. While it is one of the names given in the Fantasy Flight Games sourcebooks, it doesn’t seem to have a source anywhere else in New Canon.

Ohma-D’un

Ohma-D’un has one New Canon source outside of RPG sourcebooks: the 2018 reference book Star Wars: Smuggler’s Guide. In Smuggler’s Guide, Tyro Viveca (one of the owners of the in-universe book) mentioned seeing bursa-baiting on Ohma-D’un. Bursas are bear-like creatures originally from Legends material, where they were known to attack and destroy Gungan settlements.

I had a picture of a captive bursa for illustrative purposes, but honestly it made me too sad so I deleted it. Nevertheless, that’s stronger detail and evidence than we have for either Rori or Veruna.

Bonus fact: Naboo officially has no such thing as prison. When Panaka mentions this to Rabé, she says, “Only because we send everyone to the moon” (Queen’s Peril). Enjoy those implications!

TL;DR

While Onoam is definitely one of the moons, what you call the other two is up to each person’s discretion until something else is stated. Personally, I prefer Ohma-D’un and Rori, rather than Veruna. This partly because I don’t like Veruna the Legends figure (petty) and partly because Rori has some interesting Legends lore that could be drawn on in a pinch, which as far as I can tell Veruna does not. 

[your-adam55]

Even Though You Think It's Impossible, I'll teach

You How To Use This Technique To Compel Your Ex

To Fall Back In Love With You Again... For Good!

Review For MALE Audiences

Missing your ex-girlfriend like crazy? You need to see this.

Make Your Girlfriend BEG You To Take Her Back?

The ONLY way to get your girlfriend back...

OVERALL: 9.8 / 10

EFFECTIVENESS: 10 / 10

FORMAT: 9.6 / 10

VALUE: 10 / 10

SUMMARY:

Brad Browning's "Ex Factor Guide" program is easily the most comprehensive and most effective guide to getting your ex back. After reviewing a number of similar products, we recommend "The Ex Factor Guide" as the #1 choice if you're looking for a step-by-step instruction manual on how to win your ex back.

FULL REVIEW:

When I first stumbled across Brad Browning's new "Ex Factor Guide" program, I thought it would probably be like all the rest of the 'ex-back products for sale on the internet. Boy, was I wrong!

First of all, "The Ex Factor Guide" is easily the most thorough and comprehensive guide ever written on the subject. It leaves no stones unturned: you may think that your situation is unique and that any book on the topic can't possibly address the issues you're facing. Well, with "The Ex Factor Guide", that's definitely not the case! Brad has covered every possible scenario and "what if," meaning that by the time you've finished reading the program, your questions are almost certain to have been answered in-depth.

Not only is it the most comprehensive program, it's also the only guide we're found that actually provides hundreds of real-world examples on how to apply Brad's techniques. Brad's chapter on text messages, for example, offers dozens of canned text messages you can send to your ex that are almost guaranteed to get a response!

Perhaps most importantly, it's very clear that the sneaky psychological techniques recommended by Brad in "The Ex Factor Guide" have been researched and tested by couples in the real world. Brad Browning is a certified relationship counselor, and his decades of experience working with couples to repair broken relationships is clearly evident throughout the book. He offers dozens of unique and ground-breaking ideas that I've never read anywhere else.

Brad claims that over 90% of all relationships can be salvaged, and while that may sound unreasonably high, I actually tend to think he's being completely honest. It's no stretch to imagine that, as he states on his website, anyone who reads and applies his techniques is almost guaranteed to have their ex begging for a second chance.

What about the program itself? The core of the program is a 125-page e-book, professionally written & presented in PDF format. There's also an audio version and a cool video course also included in the price, plus two excellent bonus e-books that cover various topics not addressed in the main e-book.

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[sagiow]

Mercy Street - Hallmark Edition

For Mercy Street Hallmark Movie day, here are the synopses of the Luke MacFarlane Christmas movies recast in Mansion House based solely on their names (no cheating, the only one I’ve watched is The Mistletoe Promise). And because it’s 2020 and the Hallmark Channel still won’t, I’ve made them all LGBTQ.

Chateau Christmas (lol ok I Iike that one)

Through a mysterious letter, still-mourning-although-it’s-been-two-years widow Mary Phinney finds out that she inherited a small, struggling vineyard and ramshackle chateau from Gustav’s unknown great-aunt in Alsace, and decides to put her veterinary practice on old for a month to evaluate her new assets. There she meets - and butts heads with -  the winery’s exacting yet artistic master vintner, Lisette Beaufort, whose guarded, veneered exterior hides also a grieving heart. Will their common care for the vineyard’s survival, appreciation for art and Gewurtzstraminer, and the magical Christmas season in picturesque Strasbourg make allies - et peut-être plus - out of these two women?

Secret scoop: Expect plenty of outdated, Emily In Paris-style French stereotypes and swooping views of Alsace that were actually shot in British Columbia.

Sense, Sensibility & Snowmen (FFS)

Following their mother’s second, ruin-saving marriage to her distant cousin, Sir Alfred Summers,  Emma and Alice Greenwood move from their native Virginia to his estate in Connecticut. There, Alice is swept on a whirlwind romance with the dashing Captain Willoughby Tallboots, under the melancholy eyes of retired officer Colonel Bullen, while Emma silently pines for her best friend and secret love, Isabella Friars. More distant cousins appear with convoluted relationships, passive-aggressive exchanges over long country walks and they probably go for a fortnight to Bath Newport before it all ends happily in a double wedding.

Bonus scene: Colin Firth emerges from the frozen lake in a wet shirt (Wrong movie? Don’t care.)

Maggie’s McBurney’s Christmas Miracle (ugh so cheesy)

Clay McBurney had landed the hottest deal of the season: planning the upstate New York wedding of Virginia heiress Emma Green to local war hero Henry Hopkins. He has booked the best location : Mansion House Lodge. It has everything: rustic yet elegant charm, breathtaking views, killer cellar, and a top celebrity chef, Pink Erton (yes, they’re that Pink Erton). However, he soon learns that Pink and him don’t exactly see eye to eye on how the Lodge should run the year’s biggest event. With a major snowstorm threatening to bring utter chaos to his carefully laid out perfect plans, and the bride’s family, total Armageddon, perhaps Matt Brannan, the gardener who used to be their army general (and could also be Santa) can help bring the magic back and save the day.... A musical ensues. 

Secret scoop: Some themes sound maybe kinda similar to Christmas Chateau? Of course they do: it’s a Hallmark Christmas movie!

The Mistletoe Promise (this one I’ve actually watched (thanks @fericita-s!) so real plot adapted)

Henry Hopkins wants to make partner at his law firm, but the company has a policy of promoting only “good family men with proper conservative values”, and he is happily single - and very, very gay. Jed Foster is running his travel agency with his ex-wife, Eliza, who now has the most irritating and single-brain celled new boyfriend, Byron. As this wasn’t bad enough, the Christmas party season is upon then, and showing up solo is not option. After meeting and commiserating in a mall food court, the two men enter an agreement to be each other’s "+1″ for the holidays to stick it to their workplaces. Could this “strictly business” arrangement (and weekend getaways to Christmassy NYC with horse-drawn carriage rides and a hotel suite with only one bed) lead to more?

Bonus scene: Henry teaches Jed how to ice-skate (shot on a shitty greenscreen + treadmill with no appreciation whatsoever of how one actually moves on skates)

Christmas Land (well that’s just terribly vague)

Real Estate developer Anne Hastings hates Christmas, which is why she always gets TF out of Chicago to spend it on a white sandy beach with many-a sweet drink and many-er sexy strangers. However, this year, her firm has the opportunity of purchasing land next to the little town of Nowell, close to the Canadian border in Vermont, to turn it into a giant, duty-free, fireworks-and-booze-and-pot selling outlet mall, and she is shipped out to strike the deal. There, she meets Charlotte Jenkins, the Georgia girl who always dreamt of a white Christmas, and who came all the way North after her husband died to open a florist/bookstore/coffeeshop, raise her two children, and hey, write a novel, why TF not, in the town she lovingly calls Christmas Land. Will Charlotte’s bright eyed goodness, delicious hot chocolate and adorable -and hammy, over-acting- kids make Anne discover the true meaning of Christmas... and perhaps even true love?

Bonus scene: There is a snowball fight that ends with them slipping and falling one on top of the other, with their laughter fading in an oh... oh moment, that’s interrupted by a kid before it gets anywhere interesting.

A Shoe Addict’s Christmas (uuuuugh whyyyyy)

Byron Hale loves shoes. He looooves them. He can never have enough, but his small bakery barely makes enough to cover rent and supplies. All this changes when he decides to take part in the Great Gingerbread Bake-Off, which whisks him off in magical Genosovia, a non-descript European country where people speak in Britishish accents. There, he meets Samuel Diggs, another competitor in the contest, whose lebkuchen with royal *wink wink* icing is the stuff of legends. Despite himself and the romance of Old Québec City Europe, Byron cannot help but slowly fall for the sweet, kind, really really ridiculously good-looking adversary. But perhaps there is something more regal *nudge nudge* to good ol’ Sam?

Bonus scene: Flour fight while baking something festive, which ends with Samuel pinning Byron to the fridge, their laughter fading in an oh... oh moment -ah crap just used that one already... ok, so let’s go with grandiose decorations in the palac---- huh town hall.

Secret scoop: Sam is a Prince. Oh that’s not a scoop? Nor secret? Damnit.

Of course, all first kisses occurs in the last scene of the movie under the mistletoe, softly falling (fake) snow and a jazzy rendition of a classic Christmas tune.

[undyingembers]

Catch Up

I was tagged by @risualto

Three Ships:

Benrey/Gordon Freeman - HLVRAI: So this would never work in canon, but it’s just a lot of fun! I think more than anything, I like the fandom for HLVRAI. It’s very free of a lot of the mainstream/capitalist baggage that makes it hard to get invested in other fandoms, and that makes for a very wide range of fanart and fanfics for this pairing. And I’ll never stop laughing that Gorgon Freeman/Benrey made the top 100 ships!

Amali/Tekehu - Pillars of Eternity II: Deadfire: I really can’t stop thinking about them. They’re so unusual, yet so wonderful! The handsome fish really does need more love; he’s just adorable when romanced--and super devoted. I didn’t think that Amali would play very well with him, but I was very pleasantly surprised. She needs someone who will give their all in a relationship, and it turns out she has a lot of love to give as well. Fun fact: Amali wasn’t going to have a romance at all. She never clicked romantically with Aloth, and for some reason I thought it was an indicator that romance may not be for her :P

Lenarius/Daeran - Pathfinder: Wrath of the Righteous (UNDER CONSTRUCTION): I wasn’t going to put that one there, since WotR hasn’t come out yet as of writing this, but the pairing has been on the brain and just won’t go away. Also, I’ve...uh played the alpha, so I won’t go too much into detail, but I’m liking what I’m seeing so far.

Another one of those “I cannot believe they got together” romances. When Daeran was first announced as one of the “bonus” kickstarter romances, I thought that there was no way that my uptight magical son was going to get together with this aasimar playboy. I don’t even know what happened. When Owlcat released a kickstarter announcement fleshing him out a little more, I got intrigued by the thought of the two of them together. I just thought it would be the funniest thing ever. I can’t wait until the full game comes out!

Last songs listened to:

One of Disturbed’s newest album ��Believe’. I love metal, and this is one of those ‘listen to the same things on repeat’ things for me. Plus pretty much every song has a very strong Tara/Bishop vibe, and I love it.

Currently watching:

Nothing right now, but I should start watching His Dark Materials season 2.

Currently reading:

My dad got me a cookbook based off of D&D for Christmas. I’m really excited to try some of these recipes when I move to my new apartment! I just found out that there’s a new book by Brandon Sanderson that just came out. When I have some time, I’m gonna go grab a copy of it.

I’ve also reread some of my old favorites: A Series of Unfortunate Events, Stardust, A Circle of Magic. I might binge read ASoIaF one of these days.

How’s it going:

I’m...fine...very lucky all things considering. No one close to me has died, though some family members got sick and recovered. No one in my family is struggling financially. My mental health has been going up and down. I’ve had to move back in with my parents for a bit, then I moved back in my old apartment, and now I’m getting a new one. I’ve felt a lot of the year feeling worthless about myself--looking back on my life and feeling that I’ve been too sheltered and unfit to survive on my own--and working through that with my family and my therapist, but I think I’ve made progress on that.

Mainly though, I just find it hard to really feel things. I’ve not seen my friends in months, some of them for over a year, and I really miss that. I miss going to my gaming group in person. But I know that others have it much worse. I hope you guys are all right. Please stay safe.

[astonishinglegends]

Ep 194: The Siren Call of Hungry Ghosts Part 1

“The nature of things is in the habit of concealing itself.”

– Ancient Greek philosopher Heraclitus, as quoted from Page 256 of the 2001 edition of Joe Fisher’s book The Siren Call of Hungry Ghosts, published by Paraview Press

Description:

Sure, maybe most of us would find it enticing to receive "inside information" from a mystical plane, our very own oracle of knowledge beyond what's possible in our earthly human existence. Who wouldn't want access to a Spirit Guide, one that could lend us valuable insight to better our lives and give a glimpse of what awaits us on the other side? Perhaps this supernatural soothsayer could also provide a longing companionship or, even better, prove to be a soulmate from a past life? It sounds like a delightful gift, right? But what if the source of this metaphysical communication ended up having as many foibles as any ordinary untrustworthy "frenemy?" What if the messages proved to be increasingly inaccurate or questionable, with the attitude of your once beatific benefactor becoming demanding, desperate, petty, contentious, and maybe even obsessive and possessive? Perhaps it wasn't looking out for your best interests, after all? This twist seemed to be the compelling and chilling experience of Toronto-based journalist and author Joe Fisher when he became entangled with a consuming investigation into Channeling and Spirit Guides. In Part One of our examination of Fisher's book, The Siren Call of Hungry Ghosts, we're joined by our own Spirit Guide and good friend, Rich Hatem, for a discussion about Fisher's enigmatic journey into a sometimes troubling relationship with Channeling and the personalities, once-human and otherwise, that come through a medium. What materializes is realizing that our expectations of wisdom and comfort from a Higher Source can gradually lead to suspicion, fear, and doom.

Reference Links:

Joe Fisher, investigative journalist, and author

Billy Bunter

Catechesis

Catechesis on the Angels, authored by Pope John Paul II

“In Search of Hungry Ghosts: The Mysterious Death of Joe Fisher,” by Louis Proud in EdgeScience, Issue 43

Vroman’s Bookstore, in Pasadena, CA

The Vickers Wellington, a British WWII medium bomber anti-submarine aircraft

“The Vickers Wellington And Its Defensive Ring” on WorldWarWings.com

The “Submarine Reincarnation” episode from Unsolved Mysteries, Season 6, Episode 1

Newmarket Racecourse – where the soldiers slept due to a lack of accommodations

Photos of the Newmarket Racecourse grandstands

Related Books:

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CREDITS:

Episode 194: The Siren Call of Hungry Ghosts Part 1.  Produced by Scott Philbrook & Forrest Burgess; Special thanks to Rich Hatem; Audio Editing by Sarah Vorhees Wendel. Sound Design by Ryan McCullough; Tess Pfeifle, Producer, and Lead Researcher; Research Support from the astonishing League of Astonishing Researchers, a.k.a. The Astonishing Research Corps, or "A.R.C." for short. Copyright 2020 Astonishing Legends Productions, LLC. All Rights Reserved.

[cynthiaandsamus]

Game Blondes: Tekking101 One Piece Isekai Adventure!

“Hey I’m Blonde!”

“...I’m also Blonde.”

“AND WE’RE THE GAME BLONDES!!”

Game Blondes Logo by @game-overture​

One Piece Isekai Setup created by Tekking101 and found here:

https://youtu.be/zHInvsopBtQ

“Wait this isn’t a video game.” Samus pouts.

“The show’s called “GAME Blondes” not Video Game Blondes, that means any game is fair… game!” Cynthia cackles. “And today we’re doing the One Piece Isekai Adventure Game created by Tekking101!”

“I don’t know who that is.”

“That’s fine!” The Champion nods. “We’re going to roll some dice to determine how and where we get sent into the One Piece world and what goal we have to achieve in order to come back to our own world. They’ve made some reference tables to show everything about our situation and we’re gonna make little stories based on them!”

“Okay, sounds simple enough.” Samus flicks one of the dice around. “So what’s first?”

“First the Isekai Fairy comes to take you away! As per the rules the Isekai Fairy is extremely attractive for some reason and is your ideal type of attractive person. For me they look like Dawn.”

“Okay that’s strange, I guess my fairy looks like Tifa.” Samus shrugged.

“Fair enough! Now the fairy lets you get hooked up with your starting gear!”

“You get to take what you’re wearing, plus two sets of clothing and one free set of winter clothing in case you end up somewhere cold, though they have to be extremely unfashionable.”

“That seems unnecessary but given I’m weak to the cold I’d better take it.”

“You get a backpack to carry this stuff in and also arrive in perfect health, get 1 million starting beli ($9,500) and one object of your choosing.” Cynthia read down the list. “So you gotta choose something to take with you, it’s one thing and most kinds of electronics and stuff won’t work. Though pets are allowed.”

“Guess I’ll take my arm cannon since I don’t think my whole suit would fly here, and the basic laser of the arm cannon works off my own energy instead of external missiles or power sources.”

“And I’m taking Garchomp, if pets count that must mean pokemon do too!”

“But if Garchomp is one object doesn’t that mean you can’t take its pokeball?”

“… fuck, so I gotta walk around the One Piece world with a giant sand shark following me everywhere… well they’ve seen worse so I guess it’s fine, it’ll work for the intimidation factor at least and keep people off my back.”

-Cynthia’s Inventoy-

1 Million Beli, Large Backpack, Champion Coat Outfit, Summer Blouse Outfit, Hideous Plaid Winter Clothes, Garchomp

-Samus’s Inventory-

1 Million Beli, Large Backpack, Zero Suit, Workout Clothes, Neon Pink Winter Clothes, Arm Cannon

 “Okay so we’re ready to go, got our starting gear, we’ll get a bonus item once we arrive but first we have to decide where we arrive at.”

“Fuck, the One Piece world’s huge, how do we do that?” Samus blinked and tilted her head.

“More reference tables! We roll a die to determine the region we end up in and then another to determine the exact island, let’s check out those tables.”

Cynthia’s Result: 2

Samus’s Result: 6

“So I’m in the South Blue, the buttfuck nowhere of the One Piece world, and you’re in the New World, the hellish crime-littered frontier of the current storyline. We arrive at the same day the One Piece story starts so none of the events have happened yet but we do retain our knowledge of their events. Now to find the islands we’re going to!”

Cynthia’s Result: 5

“I’m in the Black Drum Kingdom, a snowy desolate area that Wapol will eventually come to rule after Luffy kicks him out of the Non-Black Drum Kingdom. For now I guess it’s up for sale though since he only becomes King of it by getting lots of money so I might have a shot at ruling it before he does.”

Samus’s Result: 11

“You land on Applenine Island, a land neighboring the country of Dressrosa ruled tyrannically by Donquixote Doflamingo. I don’t know much about it except the terrain and houses look like Apples but it’s probably a short hop over to Dressorosa if you feel like going over there and making some connections.”

“You said something about a bonus item once we arrived?”

“Yes! For this one we roll a D100 and get an extra potentially useful, potentially useless item to add to our inventory. Let’s see what we get!”

Cynthia’s Result: 38

“A fishing rod with line, tackle box and bait. Well I’m pretty good at fishing up Magikarp so that might come in handy, though I don’t know how good the fishing is on the Black Drum Kingdom, maybe ice-fishing or something…”

Samus’s Result: 42

“A bag with EXACTLY 37 green apples.”

“WHAT THE FUCK IS WITH THE APPLES!?” Samus pounded her hand on the table. “I get warped to appleburg with a bag of fucking apples!! Is this rigged!?”

“It’s all random I swear, the apples of chance just seem to favor you.”

“Ugh, I don’t know how I’ll put that to use… what’s next?”

“Well before we get our objective and figure out or paths in this world, we have to look at… the risk table!”

“You don’t have to roll it if you don’t want but you have a 50/50 shot of getting a fair boost or a horrendous hindrance to your goal.”

“Ehh fine why not, there’s no apple-related choices so what’s the worst that could happen.”

Samus’s Result: 7

“A Yonkou wants you dead.”

“FUCK.”

Cynthia’s Result: 2

“And I get to bring a family member or friend! Considering most of my family are either young or elderly and I’ve already counted pokemon as pets for the sake of this game, I’ll bring a friend! You’re already having your own adventure so I guess I’ll pick Zebes, never know when a Tentacle Metroid might come in handy around here.”

“Which Yonkou wants me dead? Like if it’s Shanks I may be able to get away from that but if it’s Kaidou like Doflamingo works for him and he’s right fucking next door.”

“Let’s roll another dice to see! There’s no reference table for this one but considering it’s pre-timeskip we’ll go with 1 is Whitebeard, 2 is Kaido, 3 is Big Mom and 4 is Shanks.”

Samus’s Result: 4

“And it’s Shanks.”

“…okay, still not great but Shanks has a small crew and doesn’t seem to personally go out hunting a lot so I might be alright.” Samus breathed a small sigh of relief.

“And now last but not least the Objective Table! This will be your goal to achieve so you can get sent back to your own world and consider the challenge successful.”

Cynthia’s Result: 7

“I have to meet a Straw Hat, specifically meet a Straw Hat while they’re on the crew. That’s not going to be easy, I know where they’ll be but they never come to the South Blue so I’ll have to go out and find them/intercept them somewhere along their journey, meaning I’ll have to go out and find my way into the grand line, this might be tricky…”

Samus’s Result: 2

“I have to Walk on a Sky Island? I mean I guess there’s a lot harder goals out there but I don’t know where the nearest place to find one would be.”

“Okay, the stakes are set, let’s make our Isekai Stories!!”

Cynthia arrives in the South Blue in the Black Drum Kingdom, with a bit of money to her name, some clothes, a Garchomp and a tentacle blob. Needless to say the townspeople are all terrified of the woman that wears hideous plaid snowgear and controls strange creatures to do her bidding but with her trusty fishing rod and the hunting of her two partners she’s able to gather some supplies, some semi-frozen fish and a few other trinkets and uses some of her money (as well as some she earns by selling some of the fresh caught fish, doing tricks with Zebes and Garchomp as a street show and various odd jobs the team of three can do for the townspeople that aren’t scared stiff of her) to book passage on a sailing ship, the goal in her mind of meeting one of the straw hat crew.

By the time she makes it to the last island in the South before the Grand Line, working up the money and supplies as well as travel has taken her over a month and murmurs of Luffy’s first bounty arise. The exact timeline is sketchy but he seems to have already beaten Arlong and is heading for the Grand Line. Judging by the timeline and how difficult it seems to buy passage on a ship heading towards the Grand Line, she’s a little bit behind Luffy and will have to find a place to make up some time.

Luckily thanks to her One Piece knowledge she knows the Straw Hats do make a few detours coming into the Grand Line, and where they’ll be spending a lot of time: Alabasta. Using the remainder of her money and some intimidation thanks to her dragon friend, she is able to buy her way onto a ship running supplies into the desert country. They have an eternal pose pointing to Alabasta and as long as the trio catch lots of fish for the crew to eat, they’re welcome to stay on until they meet their destination.

Making a straight shot from the South Blue up Reverse Mountain and to Alabasta takes a good while but Cynthia, Garchomp and Zebes arrive in the desert country where the two creatures feel right at home and Cynthia has just enough money left over from fishing that she can buy herself a desert dancer girl outfit and a horse to make it to Rainbase, the luxurious casino town where Warlord Sir Crocodile is stationed and where the Straw Hats will arrive eventually.

Cynthia stakes out the casino day and night, getting a small part time job as a waitress there to keep an eye on things until the Straw Hats inevitably arrive, assured that none of her prior actions have changed the One Piece timeline and altered the Straw Hat pirates’ path. Eventually she hears the uproar of Luffy making a scene, screaming that he will kick Crocodile’s ass. She heads over to the commotion to jump in, and just misses Luffy running past, though she collides with an equally scantily-clad dancer girl: Nami.

“Hey, I’m Cynthia.” She gives a sly wink as her face is buried in the desert-clad navigator’s chest.

And thus her mission is complete in more ways than one.

“So you buy your way into a slutty waitress job and dive into Nami’s cleavage to win?”

“I mean luckily we don’t have very combat-oriented goals here so it’s probably mostly buying our way from place to place.

“Well I guess I’ll have to see what I can come up with…”

Samus enters the New World on Applenine Island, carrying a back of apples and her arm cannon while wearing her zero suit. Far from able to just do things on her own or in a group like Cynthia, Samus has also somehow incurred the wrath of Red-Haired Shanks, one of the Yonkou that rules the New World. Acting quickly, Samus uses some of her starting money to book passage to Dressrosa, led by Warlord Donquixote Doflamingo. She allows herself to be captured by them while sneaking into the castle of the Young Lord Doflamingo, claiming that Shanks wants her dead and the best place to protect herself is under the wing of another Yonkou, Doflamingo’s Master: Kaido of the Hundred Beasts.

Intrigued by her strange weapon and the idea that the mild-mannered Shanks wants this random woman dead, Doflamingo keeps her around but fails to see why he should bring her to Kaido. Thinking of a scheme, Samus tells him a quick lie: the reason why Shanks wants her dead is because she knows the location of the Ancient Weapon Pluton, it’s location? A sky Island.

Little is known about the Sky Islands by the surface dwellers but Doflamingo is in the know enough to at least confirm their existence and the legitimacy of the usually mild-mannered Shanks wanting her head combined with a few other predications she makes about the rise of Straw Hat Luffy and certain other world events lay credence to her claims, Doflamingo starts to believe there may really be an Ancient Weapon hidden among the clouds where no one else can see.

Having already been in talks with Kaido thanks to the Smile Devil Fruit trade, Doflamingo sweetens the deal by offering Kaido the woman that knows more than she lets on, the enemy of Shanks and supposedly the keeper of an Ancient Weapon. More than happy with this and her seeming ability to predict the future as more months pass, Samus is taken to Onigashima on Wano to forcefully become a member of Kaido’s crew. He doesn’t seem ready to embark to the Sky Island just yet but he finds the insight and story she tells to be rather interesting, until one thing seals the deal: Shanks arrives at Onigashima’s gate to demand to kill Samus.

Fascinated by the fact that Shanks would show up in person and risk clashing with another Yonkou just to kill this woman, Kaido decides that her story must be true. Having already thrown himself off a Sky Island or two for kicks, Kaido decides to take her to the nearest one: the Balloon Terminal not far from Wano in the New World. The Beast Pirates decide not to fight Shanks right away, opting to make a break for it and destroy Shanks’s fleet with ease once they have Pluton as not to rack of casualties. Kaido personally leads Samus to the Balloon Terminal under the promise that she’ll be able to pinpoint Pluton’s location once she arrives In the sky.

Shanks gives chase, sinking may of Kaido’s ship in his oddly single-minded approach to killing Samus. Eventually he makes his way to Kaido’s flagship and a clash between the giant dragon god of Wano and the Red-Haired powerhouse begins. The sky splits above them and both incur injuries, Kaido taking heavy damage and eventually retreating, using his Dragon Devil Fruit to fly Samus high into the air, up to the clouds and screaming that he’ll come back down for Shanks once he has Pluton.

“Who said anything about Pluton?” Shanks asks, but too late to reach Kaido’s ears.

Kaido lands on the Sky Island of the Balloon Terminal and lets Samus off his back, transforming back into a human and demanding that the bounty hunter tell him where Pluton is NOW so he can go back and crush Shanks.

However as soon as her feet touch the cloud-like ground of the Sky Island Samus’s goal is complete and a wry smirk crosses her lips. “Goodbye, and by the way, I hate Dragons. Have an Apple” She says, tossing an apple to him as she disappears back to her own world, the great dragon emperor realizing all too late that he’s been duped and is at war with a fellow emperor, wounded and stuck on a floating cloud feeling much like the lost balloons stuck under it.

“Well that was fun, got to con a Yonkou and ride a giant dragon demon thing.” Samus smirked, fiddling with the dice. “That was a lot more enjoyable than I thought it’d be.”

“See? Told you it’d be fun! Well now that we’ve got everything sorted out and our One Piece Isekai Adventures are complete, guess we’ll see you…”

“Next time on Game Blondes!!!”

[thebenedicttwinsfuck]

Dear Consent Issues Writer,

Thank you for checking out my letter! I can’t promise this will be short but I will do my best to make it understandable! I’m going to list everything under a cut, just to be safe, and I look forward to seeing what you come up with!

As previously stated in the sign-up, my DNW’s are as follows:

- First Person POV - Gore inflicted on the victim - Permanent Marks (scarring, branding, etc.) - Blood Play - Breath Play - Vore - Torture Porn - Major Character Death - Castration - Ingestion of bodily wastes - Any injury causing brain damage - Vomit - Needles - Animal Cruelty - PiV sex

However, I also have a fair amount of likes as well. These are probably too long to compile all into one list, but here’s a short list of kinks and fetishes I will never say “No” to:

- Ageplay/ABDL/Infantilism - Watersports - Scat - Mind break - Humiliation/Degredation - Medical Play (Without needles, see DNWs) - Begging/Crying - Dollification - Feminization/Sissification

Specific Prompts Per Fandom:

The Two Princes -

Joan & Cecily xcon Rupert & Amir

I love this prompt for the potential. Joan and Cecily training Rupert and Amir to be their perfect babies, wanting nothing but to fuck their mommies, have their mommies fuck them, or (potentially, if you’re feeling saucy) instruct the boys to fuck each other.

Amir xcons Rupert/Rupert xcons Amir

Similar concept to the top, only with one person in each party. If you don’t want age play to be involved, you could also do feminization or dollification for these two, I’m not particularly picky with these pairings.

Amir & Rupert mxcon/Joan & Cecily mxcon

This is something I see working best with intoxication or sex pollen, where both parties are affected and are pining after each other, or are simply needing to get off fast and the other person is the only one around for miles that can help them. Get creative with why they’re horny messes.

Sanders Sides -

Patton Sanders xcons Any/Virgil Sanders xcons Any

I love a good reason to hate Patton and/or Virgil. If it’s not on my DNWs list, by all means, give me all the unsympathetic content with these two fucking around as they please. Bonus points if they’re in a relationship and the non/dub-con is done with someone not in the relationship.

Remus "The Duke" Sanders & Janus Sanders xcon Logan Sanders

What’s sexier than Intruloceit? Two of them ganging up on one to have them however they please. I love the concept of these two being all soft on Logan, showering him with praises and telling him how good he is even as he’s struggling to get away.

Patton Sanders forces Remus "The Duke" Sanders & Roman Sanders mxcon

This is one very specific scenario that I’d love to see. Roman gets a little too close to Remus for Patton’s liking, and in order for Patton to cast them both out from Thomas’ “light” side of the mind, he has them fuck each other. Spicy.

Remus “The Duke” Sanders & Logan Sanders mxcon

Very similar to the mxcon from TTP, I see aphrodisiacs or sex pollen being the reason for this situation. Have fun with why they’re horny and how they get off.

Original Other -

Sex Pollen Plant xcons Male Hiker OR Non-Binary Hiker

Give me all the sex pollen driving these hikers mad until they’re desperate to get off and the sex plant is the only thing that can satisfy them. Give me multiple rounds of fucking because it’s just not enough. Give me anything short my DNWs.

Non-Binary Master xcons Male Slave OR Non-Binary Slave

This one is fun to me to play with the roles. The slave of course can’t say no to their master, but what is their master asking them to do? How far do they need to go to please their partner?

Aliens xcon Male Astronomer OR Female Astronomer

Similar to the sex pollen plant, I’d love to see first contact with aliens who have xeno anatomy, or make the astonomer impossibly horny and “probe” them however you see fit short my DNWs.

Non-Binary Werewolf xcons Male Cryptid Hunter/Non-Binary Cryptid Hunter xcons Male Werewolf

Bit of a crack idea, but fun to watch nonetheless. Cryptid hunter finds the cryptid they’re looking for, but do they catch the xcon on film? Would they even want to share their discovery with the world now?

Werewolf & Bigfoot mxcon

You can also play into the crack here. I’m imagining very passionate hate sex for whatever reason you choose.

Evil Sorceress xcons Non-Binary Servant

I imagine the servant isn’t very good at their job in this situation, and the Sorceress uses magic to get the servant to do whatever she wants in bed. Again, play around a bit if you want.

Original M/M -

Male Werewolf xcons Male Cryptid Hunter

See the Original Other for the scenario here, just change the pronouns.

Male Cryptid Hunter xcons Male Werewolf

See the Original Other for the scenario here, just change the pronouns.

Evil Warlock xcons Delinquent Servant (M/M)

See the Original Other for the scenario here, just change the pronouns.

Master xcons Slave Who Attempted Escape (M/M)

This one, I see as a punishment for the slave who attempted to escape, obviously. How far did the slave get? What does the Master require in terms of a pound of flesh to get even? Feel free to have fun.

Slave xcons Master (M/M)

This is another one where you can play with the roles. Why does the slave xcon his master? For revenge for past xcon? For something else? Why is he so desperate to get even? Play around and see what feels right.

Male Frat Boy xcons Trans Male College Student

This one would probably involve transphobia of some sort. Trans man is doing his thing, maybe gets a little drunk, and the frat boy gets him to a point where he can’t say “no.” Morning-after regret or morning-after shock and rage depending on the POV party is a plus.

Male Army Cadet xcons Trans Male College Student

This one hits extremely close to home for me, because this is what I dealt with. It took me a long time to feel safe, but reading xcon and knowing that I could stop when I wanted to helped me recover, so I’m offering the situation in hopes that if someone does do it, I can heal a little. Trans man doesn’t want to have sex. The Army Cadet would push, and push, and maybe tease the trans man, touching him without his consent until the trans man is begging to stop or have sex so he can get off. And of course, the Cadet would go the sex route. If you want to punish the Cadet that gets you very high marks in my books. But if this is too niche an offer or you don’t think you can handle it, I have so many options for a reason. Seriously, I take no offense if you don’t do this one.

Male Army Cadet & Male Navy Cadet mxcon

Crack hate sex. I live for it.

NCIS -

Nick Torres xcons Timothy McGee

Feel free to make Nick unapologetically the bad guy. I especially think that after “Philly” in Season 14, Nick would try to bed Tim and not necessarily take no for an answer.

Jethro Gibbs xcons Anthony DiNozzo OR Timothy McGee

I can see Gibbs taking advantage of the whole “newbie wanting to fit in” mentality here. Play it straight, play it crack, play it angst, it’s all good.

Jethro Gibbs xcons Anthony DiNozzo & Timothy McGee

Tony and Tim comraderie. Maybe Tony warns Tim to not join the team over knowing what Gibbs would do to him. Either way, I want the strong BrOTP here.

Nick Torres xcons Ellie Bishop

Full disclosure, I’ve never been a fan of Torres/Bishop. But I love the thought of Nick doing something like this that would make them break up. Established relationship, Nick takes advantage of her, showing his true colors, and she leaves. Maybe she gets together with someone else? Who knows.

Jacqueline "Jack" Sloane xcons Ellie Bishop

I really like making Bishop the victim, but unlike Torres/Bishop, I do genuinely ship this. Feel free to make it a mind game to Jack, trying to figure out how to break Ellie, either period or break her in, so she can have a sex slave for whatever she pleases. I love dark!Jack.

Ziva David xcons Anthony DiNozzo OR Timothy McGee

I see this happening when DiNozzo goes to find Ziva. Or maybe McGee goes in his stead. Either way, Tali comes from a rape, and the man xconned in question has to deal with the aftermath.

Eli David xcons Ziva David

An explanation for Ziva’s prevalent Daddy Issues. Maybe he xconned her from when she was a young girl, maybe he only started after she became a woman (either 18 or 13, depending on your interpretation/the whole religious thing). I don’t have a lot of expectations for this one, so run wild.