#garak cannot believe he is allowed to be this lucky in this or any other lifetime. is it selfish to grab at this happiness?

[fauvester]

goofy silly lovedrunk bashir! and AWED STARRY EYED GARAK!

[becomingsea]

@lykaiia​ ;; starter call

Quark’s is, as far as Garak is concerned, a necessary evil. The sort of vulgar place made for people like him. There are places in it--near the bar and the dabo tables--where those who are there to socialize congregate. Then, there are the shadowy tables where one can sit and watch, where no one wants to be noticed, and so everyone pretends not to notice anyone else. 

He’s not sure if he does it out of habit or out of boredom. What reason does he truly have to know everything he can about what happens on the station? There is no one to report to anymore. All the same, he is one of the first ones to know when someone new has arrived. Usually, there isn’t anyone truly interesting. Either someone morally hygenic enough for Starfleet to allow onboard, or some low level criminal there for the bar’s owner who Odo would inevitably approach and pretend not to know who they are while making veiled threats.

So, it’s a rare thing when someone intriguing walks in, but today must be his lucky day. He recognizes her immediately, which makes it all the more astonishing that she survived the Occupation. He’s sure there are still some Cardassian guls who would kill her on sight, given the opportunity.

Then again, he’d never met a gul with any imagination.

He moves out of the shadows toward her at the bar. Maybe it’s foolish to make himself known to her, since she has some knowledge of who he used to be. But cannot spend another day letting himself rot in exile when he has any other option.

“Isn’t this a surprise,” he says, casually as he sits next to her. “I’d heard you were dead, but I never believe that kind of news unless I see a corpse.” He smiles pleasantly at Quark, who had started watching them with some curiousity, then quickly loked away.

[verdigrisprowl]

Dec 15 Odothon Part 4 - DS9 S3E21 S3E22

At this point finding out what’s happening with the poor alien stuck in the same position as Prowl is basically the only thing that Prowl cares about. He comes over as soon as Soundwave invites him.

Prowl is nearly convinced that, at some point, said alien is going to have to accept that, for the greater good of the galaxy, he needs to fight for the destruction of his own home world. After all, at this point, the only arguments in favor of not doing so is “how might this allow other conquering empires to expand?” and “sentimentality.” And sentimentality is no argument at all.

Odo took his first life in this episode. It prompted a conversation on having to take lives in the line of duty; it didn’t end well, but it was truncated in the middle. Perhaps next meeting they can finish it properly.

{{S3E21}}

ItsyBitsySpyers 10:37 pm *Soundwave's pretty sure all he has to do at this point is ping Prowl with an all-clear, so he does.* FakeProwl 10:38 pm *There isn't even a delay. One second after the ping, Prowl is there and taking his seat.* ItsyBitsySpyers 10:39 pm *Well! It pleases him to see that Prowl is taking an extremely active interest in this story. And the company's great.*

[[Shall we?]] FakeProwl 10:40 pm Let's. FakeProwl 10:43 pm ((bashir is clearly missing his boyfriend)) ItsyBitsySpyers 10:43 pm ((so very badly)) FakeProwl 10:43 pm ((... ARE they boyfriends at this point or is bashir still in the course of being wooed? I can't tell if his 😕 last episode was genuine annoyance or just being tsundere)) ItsyBitsySpyers 10:44 pm ((i will explain on skype)) FakeProwl 10:44 pm ((o7)) ItsyBitsySpyers 10:48 pm *What skill. Had a few good interrogations that way himself.* FakeProwl 10:48 pm *oh, look at that. spymaster and his spy.* FakeProwl 10:50 pm *prowl hasn't had an excellent interrogator since... hm. never mind him.* ItsyBitsySpyers 10:51 pm *Steeples his fingers.* FakeProwl 10:52 pm *... garak's just been told to interrogate odo.* *now. prowl does not believe that garak has switched sides.* *but he also does not believe that garak would stop short of doing the worst things at his disposal to odo in order to maintain his act.* ItsyBitsySpyers 10:54 pm [[Hm. Withdrawal. Painful way to go.]] FakeProwl 10:55 pm ... Garak's right, though. It /will/ improve the security of the universe to eliminate the Dominion. FakeProwl 10:56 pm Odo has to be intelligent enough to see that. ItsyBitsySpyers 10:58 pm [[Most people would not wish to see their entire species eradicated. Especially if it would leave them alone so soon after rediscovery.]] FakeProwl 11:00 pm I know. But even after his recent reunion, he still views them as the enemies of true order and justice in the universe, and a threat. FakeProwl 11:02 pm Odo is intelligent enough to recognize that the galaxy would be better without them—but there are more factors than that playing into this. ItsyBitsySpyers 11:03 pm [[Such as?]] ItsyBitsySpyers 11:05 pm *He dripped so much sarcasm they're lucky he's not already in a puddle.* FakeProwl 11:05 pm For instance, if he doesn't assist them, there's a chance that the Cardassian-Romulan union and the Founder world will cripple each other before one ultimately wins, rather than the Cardassian-Romulan union easily crushing the Founder world. Whichever one wins, it will take out two potential threats to the galaxy.

FakeProwl 11:08 pm But, on the other hand, if they DON'T quickly and easily crush each other, it might erupt into war—which, while ultimately taking out one or both threats, will also undoubtedly cause massive casualties, military and civilian both. FakeProwl 11:09 pm *... that looks like a mech flaking apart from a rust virus.* ItsyBitsySpyers 11:10 pm [[Given the might of both the Cardassian and Romulan empires, and the antagonistic histories with both, he is certain the Federation wouldn't mind if both sides did crush each other.]]

[[Still. If what Odo says is true - wanting to go home - he can't see Odo supporting it. As he said.]] [[Not yet, at least.]] FakeProwl 11:10 pm *hold on, Prowl's watching Odo suffer.* FakeProwl 11:12 pm ... I didn't finish listing the other factors playing into this. Odo's emotions are among them. ItsyBitsySpyers 11:12 pm [[Ah. Go on, if you have more.]] FakeProwl 11:13 pm Even if he knows that the universe would be better without them, that does not mean he does not still care about them. FakeProwl 11:15 pm At some point, he may reach the point he can put those emotions aside for the greater good. But for now, he's... /terribly/ emotion-driven. ((garak like "we're about to die, i'm gonna quote my boyfriend")) ItsyBitsySpyers 11:16 pm ((LOL)) ItsyBitsySpyers 11:17 pm [[Then you still stand on the side of eliminating them all?]] FakeProwl 11:20 pm ... Well, with Cardassia and the Romulans no longer threats. That leaves no one to battle them into a stalemate. FakeProwl 11:21 pm I'd need to know more about the other major political actors in this galaxy—any larger threats the /Dominion/ might be holding at bay, for instance. ItsyBitsySpyers 11:22 pm [[That would be his other concern. They have always said they were persecuted and hunted. He expects they've destroyed all such enemies since, but... one never knows.]] FakeProwl 11:24 pm ... The fact that they have been "persecuted and hunted" does not necessarily mean those people were /universal/ threats. ItsyBitsySpyers 11:25 pm [[This attack was rash. They know little of how the quadrant's dynamics would change, had not developed appropriate shields against potential infiltration, and have pushed the Founders somewhere they are now unlikely to be rediscovered.]]

[[It was also too egotistical. They brought twenty ships to counter a force that controls an entire quadrant. That was beyond stupid.]] FakeProwl 11:25 pm For one thing, it may have been exaggeration to give them an excuse to eliminate these enemies. For another, their own actions may have /invited/ that persecution and hunt. ItsyBitsySpyers 11:25 pm ((do you want one more before sleep or nah?)) FakeProwl 11:25 pm ((sure)) ItsyBitsySpyers 11:27 pm [[He doubts it's an exaggeration. The Rakharian said they were persecuted, and he would have no interest in protecting them.]]

[[As for your second point... it is a fair one. He cannot argue that without knowing what was done then, and he does not know.]]

[[Are you prepared to continue?]] FakeProwl 11:27 pm I am.

{{S3E22}}

ItsyBitsySpyers 11:28 pm [[Good. First, a continuation of Kai Winn Adami's actions.]]

[[Following the death of a vital government figure, Kai Winn is temporarily appointed in his place. She attempts to permanently seize it to control both sides of Bajor and is foiled, forcing her to remain the spiritual leader only.]]

[[He trusts you are beginning to understand more of her flaws as he mentions her progress.]] FakeProwl 11:30 pm Power-lust, cruelty and ruthlessness toward political rivals, a willingness to make scapegoats of anyone necessary to consolidate her power. *mumbles* Megatron if he'd landed in a temple instead of a gladiatorial ring. ItsyBitsySpyers 11:32 pm [[And some of your Primes, from what he's heard. But... he is amused. Yes.]] FakeProwl 11:38 pm Mm... *thinks about that.* Nova, definitely. Zeta. I wasn't paying close enough attention to politics during Nominus's rule, but he wouldn't surprise me. Sentinel... don't think so, but I also think two WOULD have applied if he'd reigned long enough to apply them. I'll reserve judgment on Optimus and Rodimus until they're done reigning. ItsyBitsySpyers 11:40 pm [[Hm. He questions Optimus clinging to the title despite the presence of a successor. It is... worrisome.]] FakeProwl 11:40 pm ... That, personally, doesn't concern me. FakeProwl 11:43 pm Rodimus was never supposed to be a "successor." He accidentally bonded with the Matrix while trying to steal it back for Optimus. And there is no historical precedent of a Prime's title passing onto a successor outside of death, defeat in combat, or voluntary surrender of the title. Unless we choose to believe that a Matrix bonding to someone is indeed a declaration of a choice being made by a divinity, rather than a mechanical reaction made by a sophisticated machine in the presence of correct circumstances, the Matrix "choosing" someone doesn't mean the title MUST pass on. FakeProwl 11:45 pm However, what DOES concern me is the fact that he fully surrendered his title and rank voluntarily—then came back and immediately started behaving as though he still carries the same authority he always did. FakeProwl 11:48 pm *points at screen* That's a changeling. ItsyBitsySpyers 11:48 pm [[Mm. Why not place it in every mech's chest for a few minutes and have as many changed as possible, if simultaneous holding matters so little?]]

[[That concerns him, too. It does not surprise him, however. He has observed too many timelines.]] *Soundwave taps his fingers against his thigh.* [[There are extended continuations of our own where he delivers leadership to Bumblebee, only to fight and undermine at every turn.]] FakeProwl 11:50 pm For one thing, the symbolism of it. Religion holds no /official/ legal power, but it holds enough popular power that there would be an outrage. For another... we're not entirely sure yet what... hold on. *there's FORENSIC INVESTIGATION going on.* ItsyBitsySpyers 11:51 pm *Soundwave nods, equally interested in this changeling hunt.* FakeProwl 11:52 pm *what are tetryon particles? Prowl wants to know about this test. can he use it on people* FakeProwl 11:53 pm ... Okay, well, i thought the device instead of the person was the changeling, but I get partial credit. And the Bashir in the vents was my top suspect, so. ItsyBitsySpyers 11:55 pm [[The credit is granted.]] FakeProwl 11:55 pm Thank you. FakeProwl 11:56 pm Right. So. We're not entirely sure yet what exactly triggers the Matrix to upgrade someone. FakeProwl 11:58 pm *... in all Odo's time as security, he's never fired a weapon or taken a life; and Prowl respects him a little bit more.* ItsyBitsySpyers 11:59 pm [[He doubts it has anything to do with patience and calm temperaments.]] Yesterday FakeProwl 11:59 pm By their own reports, both Orion and Hot Rod were near-fatally damaged when the Matrix upgraded them; and in fact Hot Rod had been running around with the Matrix a bit BEFORE his damage and it didn't upgrade him then. FakeProwl 12:01 am Thunderclash, whose Matrix affinity levels are off the charts, has carried the Matrix for extended periods of time. It liked him so much that it welded itself into his chest at least once. ItsyBitsySpyers 12:03 am *Shudder. Parasitic little bauble.* FakeProwl 12:03 am And yet it never upgraded him. Maybe it's because he didn't nearly die while carrying it. Or, for all we know, maybe it's because he's already wearing the very apex of what his body has the potential to be, and so there's nothing to upgrade. We just don't know. ItsyBitsySpyers 12:04 am [[He doesn't suppose Thunderclash would volunteer to be brought near death by skilled doctors to find out.]] FakeProwl 12:04 am We can't risk that with him. ItsyBitsySpyers 12:05 am [[Why?]] ItsyBitsySpyers 12:08 am [[Good timing.]] FakeProwl 12:08 am He's too important to risk losing to a failed experiment and a doctor who pressed slightly too hard. ItsyBitsySpyers 12:09 am [[He hears sentiments like that a lot. One day, when we have more time, he will ask you to explain that to him.]] FakeProwl 12:10 am ... Think of all the things that Optimus's most fervent worshippers say about him. About Thunderclash, they're true. ItsyBitsySpyers 12:10 am [[...You exaggerate.]] FakeProwl 12:11 am Well. His behavior is still bound by the laws of what's physically possible. ... Usually. But, aside from that, it's all true. ItsyBitsySpyers 12:11 am *He has heard Some Things, Prowl. Smokescreen's book repeatedly claims Optimus was one of the original 13, for Pit's sake. You can't convince him THAT'S true about Thunderclash. He can't be convinced of that about anyone except Alpha Trion.* [[Hm. He'll want stories, when we discuss this mech. Be sure to have your best ready by then.]] FakeProwl 12:13 am I don't need to share stories. After all—HE adequately fills out his paperwork. He writes thorough reports. ItsyBitsySpyers 12:14 am [[Thorough reports he doubts he will be allowed to read.]]

*Soundwave abruptly points at the screen.* FakeProwl 12:14 am *he's watching.* *The first time Odo's had to harm someone in the line of duty. The first changeling to ever harm another changeling.* FakeProwl 12:18 am *and after that, he's very quiet.* ItsyBitsySpyers 12:19 am *...Isn't quite sure why. He has ideas, but he's not going to voice them. That'll be up to Prowl to do, if he wants.*

*Instead, he'll just offer a hand and tilt his helm to the side.* FakeProwl 12:19 am *he'll take it.* ItsyBitsySpyers 12:20 am *Soundwave will squeeze it in those skinny fingers of his and wait for Prowl to work out what he wants to do now.* FakeProwl 12:22 am *he's still putting words together. and still deciding if he actually wants to share any of them.* ItsyBitsySpyers 12:24 am *Then there they'll sit for the moment, Soundwave twisting to lightly bump Prowl's shoulder with his forehead before resting his chin on the highest part of its armor.* FakeProwl 12:26 am ... That's the worst day of any law enforcer's career. FakeProwl 12:27 am The ones who are driven to protect, anyway. The ones who are driven by the fear of a gun turned against them and the thrill of the thought of turning a gun against someone else—I'm sure they looked forward to that day. And there were too many of those, I know. But... for most—that's the worst day. ... Or the second worst day, if it takes a while for the shock to blow over and the horror to set in. ItsyBitsySpyers 12:30 am [[...You sound like you still remember yours.]] FakeProwl 12:31 am His name. His city. His taxonomy. His entire police file. Even his batch number. FakeProwl 12:34 am ... Until your first one, it's so easy to—to believe you're some kind of supercop. If you've never killed someone when so many other enforcers have, then it's because they're all failing at their job; and you're more wise, more just, more skilled, more merciful. ItsyBitsySpyers 12:36 am [[That is an expensive dose of humility.]] FakeProwl 12:36 am Until the day comes when someone is pointing a gun at someone who doesn't deserve it and the only way to stop him from pulling the trigger is by pulling yours. FakeProwl 12:37 am And you're not a supercop anymore. You're just—another enforcer who killed someone. You aren't better than the others, you were just never pushed to the same point as them. So does that mean sometimes it IS necessary? Or does it mean you're failing at your job, too. ItsyBitsySpyers 12:39 am [[Which do you yourself think?]] FakeProwl 12:41 am ... It's a question I've asked myself. Would the /perfect/ cop never have to take a life, no matter the situation? FakeProwl 12:42 am I've run simulations in my sleep. Made up unwinnable scenarios for this hypothetical perfect cop, where he'd be forced to pull a trigger. FakeProwl 12:44 am Given a week or two of scenario time, he always manages to squeeze out a nonfatal solution. The longest I kept rerunning a scenario was five months. But he succeeded. Four million years—and I still don't have an answer. ItsyBitsySpyers 12:47 am *Long, slow vent.* [[May he speak plainly?]] FakeProwl 12:48 am Of course. ItsyBitsySpyers 1:03 am [[You look too far for what is obvious.]]

[[You - *you* - required five months to find a solution for your toughest scenario. Five months of sleep simulations. Hundreds of them. Thousands of them. Perhaps more.]]

[[So, then. One mech in many thousands will find the perfect solution. Expecting that same mech to manage it over and over, every time, forever...]]

[[Perfection is an unattainable state. No mech can reach it. No existence can uphold it. The scientists, the police, the artists, the construction mechs... all will stumble. Those who strive for it anyway - who fight for it and grieve for their failures - are the ones to be admired.]]

[[You spoke of enforcers driven by fear and the thrill of murdering others. They are not to be permitted. He would strike them down.]]

[[One who worries as much as you have and do, and who fights for true protection? They would likely be worthy. Imperfect. But worthy.]] FakeProwl 1:05 am When a law enforcer stumbles, someone dies who shouldn't have and didn't have to. That's /never/ acceptable. FakeProwl 1:06 am Anyway, that's not the point of my thought exercise. It's to invent the worst-worst ever possible scenarios and see if they can be defeated anyway, not to explore hypothetical normal situations that actual officers actually face. I'm throwing unstoppable swords at unbreakable shields to see which one cracks. It's—a mathematical problem I'm trying to solve. Not a practical one. No. Normal situations, like the one I faced? It took me seven seconds to figure out how I could have avoided killing him. I didn't need to be perfect. I just needed to be seven seconds better. ItsyBitsySpyers 1:21 am [[That IS the point of it. It is mathematical AND practical. You will not always be seven seconds better. Six seconds. Three seconds. Zero. And that may eventually make it a necessity and a failure, but that eventuality exists because existence itself cannot be perfected. Not without turning to projects like your Shockwave created, and those do not protect others either.]]

[[Being unable to change that doesn't mean giving up on getting as close as one can to perfect anyway. It doesn't mean leaving it to the willing murderers. Life and work can't stop at imperfection. That is death. Dwelling without doing is nothing.]] FakeProwl 1:22 am ... I didn't say it does mean giving up, much less leaving it to the murderers. I think you're confusing this discussion for a different one you'd rather be having. And I ought to be preparing for work. ItsyBitsySpyers 1:23 am [[No. Not entirely.]]

[[But you should.]] FakeProwl 1:25 am *in the end, maybe he shouldn't have said something.* *a farewell ping, and he disappears.* ItsyBitsySpyers 1:34 am *Soundwave rubs his temples, frustrated, and heads upstairs to rest.*