#fun police at it again 😑

[lqfiles]

“you’re so cute y/n” and what if i screamed, haechan?? no bc i sat there for like five minutes thinking, “HE SAID CUTE SO MANY TIMES???” i had to reread and make sure that i read his response to her correctly because WHATTT????

also mark is so funny in this using the “tickle your pickle” idiom 😭 i use it ALLLL the time on my friends and i giggle every time because i genuinely think i’m a comedian sometimes

ptp is so well written oh my goodnessss, im super excited to see where this goes :))

GET SHOT OR MAKE SURE HAECHAN DOESNT CALL MC CUTE FOR A DAY… EVERYONE DEAD 💔

i was like “we ball, lets make this cutesy and down badful” and this is the result, we freaking love you down bad haechan. a little reassuring message got him all weak awww

HSKDHSJWK I LOVE IT TOO idek where i got it from but i saw it one day on day and was like HELL YES… i said it to oomf in dms two weeks ago and DEADASS she said the same thing as mc i was cryinggg 😭 i don’t have a dick but if i had one you best believe it would’ve been tickling at that like don’t playyy lollll such a silly idiom, i believe you are indeed a comedian anon

YOURE SO SWEET THANK YOU i don’t think it’s well written at all since i’m just making stuff up on the way but thank you for putting your trust in the future of it :P will make sure it doesn’t disappoint (hopefully)

[jiminrings]

he's just Taehyung™️! aka himbo police dispatcher drabble series sneak peek

wherein you’re taehyung’s long-term, long distance, low commitment, casual girlfriend (aka a barbie movie-inspired drabble!!)

Taehyung’s a hit in the precinct.

He’s not the only dispatcher in the office, but it feels like he is most of the time given the amount of attention he gets. He’s not the brightest nor the quickest either, but he still gets praised as if. He has a uniform, unlike you, and he wears and pulls “the living fuck out of it” as told by your chief.

“So you’re telling me that in this whole precinct, I’m the only one who knows that you and Taehyung are a thing?” Seokjin scrunches his nose, taking a bite of the donut you’ve willingly bought him. It’s one of the only cliches he allows himself (he figures he can because he’s the chief and nobody else is gonna make fun of him for it except you) as he chews noisily, harder to digest what you’re saying instead of the sugar.

“We’re not exactly a thing,” you mumble, sinking further to the chair in front of him. You’re not being interrogated and yet the war in your mind is just the same; almost equivalent to the number of people who throw themselves at Taehyung on a daily basis. “It’s uhm, it’s hard to explain.”

“Come on. You’re a detective, Y/N. You know better than to fumble with your words like that,” he teases, his tone lighter than it is serious. It does help that the two of you are more familiar with each other than anyone else (except for Taehyung in your case) in the whole precinct because you were childhood friends, the casualness present for you to even have a conversation of this nature. “Explain, or I’ll pull you off your case.”

“Jin!” you shriek in panic, on the verge of breaking because you can never tell when he’s messing with you or when he’s serious about pushing his powers. You’re only placated by his laugh, the sorry look that crosses his face right after making you want to be insulted again instead of pitied.

“You’ve been whatever you are to Taehyung for years, and the both of you have been working here for even longer. The fact that I’m the only one who knows what’s going on is concerning,” he shrugs, handing you the last bit of his donut that you only stare at. You should be disgusted that he’s left you a piece with teeth marks to begin with, but you don’t focus on that.

Instead, your stomach churns because Seokjin is right.

“Have you ever seen the Barbie movie?” he hums, aware of the turmoil in your mind but he decides to test you further just so that if you’d hurt, it would only happen at this instance instead of being dragged out.

“No. I don’t like going to theaters alone and… Tae didn’t wanna watch it,” you mumble towards the end, feeling more pathetic the more that you try to grasp what exactly you are (and aren’t) to him.

“Figures,” your chief mumbles, shaking his head. “I’ll torrent it for you and we won’t report each other for piracy. Does that sound good?”

“That’s good, Jin. Random too,” you chuckle, toying with your badge. Seokjin’s on his way out of the office and your eyes would follow him to keep eye contact — if only you didn’t see Taehyung at the corner of your eye, laughing boisterously as yet another coworker brings him a cup of coffee that he didn’t even want. You clear your throat to keep your composure, determined not to break. “What’s Barbie got to do with me anyway?”

“I won’t spoil it, but I think you’re Barbie,” he purses his lips, tapping his hand against the doorframe out of habit, but mostly to keep you awake and away from your thoughts. “Taehyung’s unfortunately Ken, and you just happen to be his long-term, long distance, low commitment, casual girlfriend.”

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this taehyung will be... Something all right 😑😑😑 wanna read the entire chapter now + succeeding installments + exclusive content and early access? subscribe to my patreon :D

to get ahead of the questions, this will only be a patreon-exclusive series!!! :-)