#fun fact zanror was not part of this until i watched s2 of the legend of vox machina

[littlebunnyman]

Prettiest little wife

Lord and Lady Briarwood have special plans for Percy after they take over Whitestone.

He enjoys himself more than he expected.

featuring an arranged marriage, a wedding dress, and Grog sharing Percy

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Beginning under the cut

Percy had always thought- well, he’d never spent much time thinking about marrying anybody, but if he had, he would have thought it would be because he loved that person. Not this charade.

Professor Anders pats his arm and, with the veil covering his face, he allows himself to glare.

“I remember my own wedding as if it was yesterday,” Delilah Briarwood had told him just an hour ago. “I had been so happy... To know Sylas would be mine and I would be his.” She’d sighed wistfully. “I couldn’t stop smiling. And now look at your sour face- you are meant to be looking forward to this wonderful occasion. Be merry. Have fun.”

“I did not choose to marry.”

She had caressed his face and grabbed his chin when he tried to turn away. “But think of your sister. Cassandra has been so excited for today, she could not stop talking about it. She misses you. Nothing would please her more than to see you again. Especially if it’s to celebrate your wedding.”

The message had been clear. She wanted a happy facade, a wedding reception without any incidents, and she expected him to play his part. And if he didn’t, if he dared not look excited at any point, Cassandra would pay for it.

Professor Anders leads him past rows filled with humans on one side, and goliaths on the other. He feels their stares, their whispers amplified by the high ceiling of the temple. He grits his teeth and focuses on the priest waiting at the end of the aisle. And his husband-to-be.

They didn’t get to meet before. He is part of the Herd the Briarwoods want to work with but he doesn’t know if he is aware of Percy’s status in Whitestone. Percy doesn’t even know his name. But he is big and when Professor Anders hands him over, the goliath’s hand completely wraps around his.

“Hi,” his future husband says and Percy ducks his head demurely, if only to stop looking at the broad, naked chest in front of him.

He blinks away the sudden tears in his eyes. He knew the Briarwoods meant to humiliate him by forcing him to wear a white dress, the many layers of its skirt sitting heavy on his hips, to show everyone what a “pretty bride” he made. But he hadn’t expected this burning shame in the face of the goliath he would promise himself to. That his first impression of Percy would be this dolled up version, the picture perfect bride eagerly looking forward to his new life at his husband’s side.

Movement in the corner of his eye catches his attention. It’s Cassandra, sitting in the front row next to Sylas Briarwood, alive and looking healthy. She’s smiling and subtly waves again. Lord Briarwood takes her hand between his and her smile wobbles.

This is who he is doing it for. Let them humiliate him, let them marry him off to some barbarian. It’s all worth it as long as they leave Cassandra alone.

The priest drones on and on and Percy only tunes in again as he pronounces them married- him and Grog. Grog Strongjaw. His husband. Was his last name Strongjaw too, now?

Grog grabs his veil and Percy forces his lips into a smile. Happy. He needs to be happy.

The veil lifts.

Grog blinks.

Percy’s stomach sinks.

Grog hadn’t known. He’d thought he was marrying a woman. He’d thought Percy was a woman.

He holds on to his smile even as his face burns. Do something. Please.

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