#formula 1 drabbler

[callmewrinkles3]

Bliss.

Dan should have realized this before. Considering how well he knew Em he should have seen it before, but for some reason he didn't. Then it hit him right in the face when they were in LA and he couldn't unsee it. As part of their honeymoon, they were spending some sunny days away from everything and everyone in their house. They said their entire year would be a honeymoon split into tiny parts between work commitments, but they really didn’t mind. Dan promised Em a year off so she could relax, and spending their time without a hurry was the beginning of it. Having some time together was exactly what they needed to keep working on their relationship and themselves. Dan had to admit it was working. Some days it took tears and long talks, others it was just days in bed doing nothing but holding each other. After the most terrifying and stormy year things were good, so he was as happy as could be. After everything they went through, his Emmy was happy and smiling, so things were good. 

That morning at home it was as relaxing as it could be. He woke up his dreamy wife with kisses all over her legs, put a smile on her face as she grabbed his curls and moaned his name, then they cuddled and kissed until their breaths were even and they got hungry. Their plan was working and Dan could see it thanks to Em's smile. After breakfast between stolen kisses and cheesy words, Dan convinced his wife to go to their pool. It only took him one smile, then the next thing he knew Em was lying on the side of the pool. The coolest thing about having a pool in their LA residence wasn’t being able to cool off on really hot days, but Em’s wardrobe choices. Em's wardrobe had certain pieces reserved exclusively for Dan and Dan only. There were things she would only wear in front of her husband, and a tiny red bikini was part of that collection. Dan knew he was a lucky man. He got to live his dream and race cars as he always wanted. He had a wonderful family, incredible friends, and if that wasn’t enough, he had the best wife in the world. The sweetest, smartest, most beautiful woman with the biggest heart decided to give him a chance not once but twice, and then she decided to marry him. She was there in his arms every day and night, supporting him through thick and thin. She asked for love in return for all the sacrifices she made for them. Dan knew he was extremely lucky and thanked his lucky stars every night for his life, but especially when he got to see his Emmy like that.

The world knew Dan always got distracted when Em was in front of him. Everyone knew about the silly smiles and love sick puppy eyes that always appeared on his face when his girl was in the same room. It was even harder to focus when she looked as breathtaking as she did that day. She was laying down on the floor by the pool, her hand touching the water lazely as she sang softly to the music playing inside the house. Dan had been trying to convince her to get into the water with him for a while. However, Em insisted she was fine there as she tried to gain some color on her skin after months and months of looking too pale. She giggled every time Dan kissed or teased her. The water dripping from his body fell over her, putting a smile on her face even when she complained and called him silly. Dan didn't stop there, doing it again and again, either kissing her or just using his wet hands to let waterdrops fall all over her chest. Seeing the water move against her skin was nice, but kissing them was his favorite thing to do. Dan kissed every drop, moving from his wife's chest to her neck, and all the way down to her stomach.

It wasn't weird or new for Dan to rest his head against Em's chest or stomach to look at her. If they had it their way, they would spend hours and days there. It was normal to find them like that, just like it was normal to find Em stroking and playing with Dan's curls. It was his thing to place soft kisses over her stomach, silently praying that all their attempts to start their own family would soon work.

Dan didn’t want to let his mind go there. They both promised each other to at least try not overthink about it. He promised Em there was no pressure, that it would happen soon or later, so he didn’t want to stress about it or she would notice. Instead Dan decided to think about their plans for the future, smiling at the fact that they were there together. His girl was there with him, absolutely stunning under the LA sun, and he sometimes couldn’t understand how lucky he was. For the rest of the world the universe was that immense thing that included time, space, matter, energy, and everything in between. But for Dan, his whole universe measured one meter sixty. His planets and stars were her freckles and tattoos, and her heart was as big and warm as the sun. The definition says everything that exists is part of the universe, and they might be right, because he was absolutely part of her.

Em smiled and stroked his cheek to grab his attention while he gazed at her stunning face for a moment as she asked, "Earth calling, Mr. Ricciardo “You alright, Love?” 

“Never better.” 

“You sure?”

“Hundred percent. Sunny LA and a pool with my baby girl? Doesn’t get better than this” Dan affirmed, kissing the palm of her hand a couple times. 

“It could be better, actually.”

“Oh yeah? How?”

“I could have my little lemon water in my hand...” 

“Of course you could. Anything else?” 

“Nope, but thank you, darling.”

Dan would never say no to anything his wife asked for, so if she wanted her lemon Sanpellegrino he would run to get it for her. Not racing that year sucked, but being there with her felt like a gift. Drinking a beer on a normal Friday afternoon in the middle of the racing season felt like a privilege. Knowing he could spend the rest of the day and not have to wake up early as he would normally do on a race day somehow put a smile on his face. He wanted to be back the next year because he loved his job, but if it didn’t happen and that was his life he was happy. Waking Em up with kisses and not with an alarm ringing through the room was something they got used to too fast. Thinking about being at home with his family raising a bunch of half British half Aussie babies and seeing them running around the farm with his girl by his side made Dan smile like nothing else did. 

It only took him two minutes to grab his beer, Em’s drink and a box of strawberries. He knew it was gonna put a smile on his wife's face as it had been her favorite snack of the month. It wasn’t weird to see Em eating the same thing all day for weeks and then finding something different as a snack, so he wasn’t surprised the new thing was strawberries. He couldn’t help but smile as he stepped out and looked at his wife. He could make more than one joke about her bikini being the same color as the fruits in his hand and how she looked as eatable as them. He could laugh about his own ridiculous comments, but Em was there with her eyes closed and he somehow didn’t have the heart to interrupt her. She looked so relaxed and peaceful, almost as if she was always meant to be there. 

It suddenly hit him straight in the face. 

One look at her and suddenly it was clear as the day. He knew it was ridiculous and probably impossible, he even might be hallucinating but he could see clearly as the day a bump that wasn't there before. He knew Em's body. He was the lucky man who spent the last five years of his life by her side almost every night. He knew Em's body and heart like the palm of his hand and loved it. His Emmy was his home and shelter, so he recognized something he never saw before. Dan also realized that he must be imagining things. If she was pregnant, she couldn't be more than a couple weeks. He was there holding her when her last period came and deception hit her straight in the face for another month. He held her tightly as he promised it would be fine because eventually it would happen. He knew deep down in his heart it would happen. He tried to make her smile even if just a bit by saying they could keep practicing because it was his favorite thing about trying to have a baby. He felt proud of himself when a tiny smirk appeared on his wife’s face. Making quick math, Dan realized it had been almost five weeks since then. 

It all came together like pieces in their right place. Dan knew Em’s period wasn’t perfectly timed since she quit the pill last year. He thought that was the reason she was a couple of days late. Between traveling and time zones and everything in between it wasn’t weird. But then it was the strawberries and Dan realized it wasn’t another of Em’s normal hyperfixations with something she liked, it was purely a whim. After five years by her side Dan knew her body perfectly so he knew how her boobs fit perfectly in his hands. When he held them the previous night he felt they were a bit bigger than usual. Dan told himself maybe it was simply her period about to come, that’s why he didn’t even mention it to Em. Nothing of what he thought was normal was and he could feel someone taking the air from his lungs and his heart missing a beat.

The problem wasn’t that he didn’t want that, it was exactly the contrary. He wanted it so much that if it wasn't true, his heart would break. He had no idea what he was going to do if his brain was tricking him. All he wanted for years was to be exactly like that with Em, together and happily married, but also with a baby. He still dreamed of a baby with big brown eyes and crazy brown curls. Maybe their children would have straight hair like Emmy's. There was nothing he wanted more than a mini Emmy. It didn’t matter if it was a boy or girl, he wanted a baby that was part him and part Em, looking exactly like his precious wife. They deserved it. They deserved to have their baby in their arms. He dreamed about it too many times. All Dan wanted was to see his Emmy holding their daughter or son in her arms. After all the tears and the suffering they really deserved it. 

The suffering was also the reason why Dan had no idea how to talk to Em. He couldn’t live with doubt, but if he mentioned it to her and it wasn’t true, it would break her heart too. He knew more than anyone else in the world how Em could deal with another heartbreak. She couldn’t take another deception. All the horrible things that happened in the last couple years were terrible enough, but then Michael put the cherry on top to blow things up. Dan didn’t want Em to have another bad day. He didn’t want to see her crying and having to promise again that things were going to be fine. He didn't want to promise that because he didn't know when they would be fine. They were getting there and getting better every single day. But even when they were happy and stable as they could be, sometimes they had a bad day. That's when Dan made promises, knowing the better days would come back eventually. 

“Danny? Everything alright?” Em wondered, bringing him back from the other dimension where his brain was. Shit. Shit shit shit. 

“Yeah.” He lied, walking slowly towards his wife. He couldn’t lie to her. It was impossible for him to keep anything from her, especially something like that. They said no more lies and the only exceptions were nice surprises, so he couldn’t do it. He couldn’t sit there, look at her in the eyes and act like it was all good. Em could read him like a book, so she would find out sooner or later. “Actually… Can I talk to you, baby?" 

Em nodded twice as she reached out her hand for Dan while a worried face appeared on her face. He knew that frown way too much and wanted to avoid it. "It's alright, Dimples. Just talk to me?”

Dan sat down in front of her, leaving everyone on the floor except his beer. He needed a sip, so he took a long one trying not to get any more nervous. Em’s hand over his helped more than any alcoholic drink could. His wife locking their fingers together and bringing them close to her mouth to kiss his wrist tattoos and knuckles was more effective than any breathing exercise he could apply in that moment. 

“Emmy there’s- Its there any chance you might be pregnant?” Dan asked in a whisper, looking down at their joined hands before he could have the courage to look up at her face. 

When he finally did it, Emmy’s face changed. The relaxed look she had when he left to go to the kitchen had completely vanished. It was now replaced but a mix of feelings, making her mouth open slightly and her eyes shine. Dan could see surprise, confusion, fear and panic creeping in. He could see the anxiety taking over, making him know he should have stayed in silence. 

“What?”. It was softer than a whisper, almost impossible to hear her words. He wouldn’t have been able to if he wasn’t sitting in front of her. 

"Your period is late, babe. I know it’s normal but it’s not only that. Your boobs feel different. Perfect kind of different, but different. Then you want strawberries all the time. And call me a crazy cunt, but I can see a tiny little bump that wasn’t there. I might be imagining things for how much we want it, but I don’t know, Emmy. Maybe I’m really seeing things. I’m sorry I’m throwing this at you but I had to tell you cause-“ 

“Hey, no, come here.” Dan didn't fight Em when she grabbed him between the cheeks and pressed their foreheads together. All he did for a moment was close his eyes and take a deep breath. “Don’t be sorry. Just don’t. You didn’t do anything wrong, alright?” 

"But what if it's not real?”

“My husband always says we keep trying till we get it right. Plus that’s the funniest part, right?” 

Dan always thought Em was a superwoman. He knew she was the strongest woman in the universe, but his admiration for her increased a hundredfold as he heard those words. He knew how scared she must have been in that moment. There was no way the anxiety was not skyrocketing inside her, but instead of panicking she was holding him. From all the things she could be doing in that moment, Em repeated the words Dan normally said to her while she made sure he didn’t panic. She was kissing his face, holding him close and making Dan think about how he always knew his wife was a superwoman, but she was also his hero. 

“Maybe this time he’s a bit right” Dan affirmed, kissing her lips again before hugging her, hiding his face against her neck. 

“Should we go change and get a test?”  

“I might have one. I got it some time ago. You know, just in case." His fear about Em getting mad at him was irrational, but he would have totally understood if it happened. They had a deal and it included no pregnancy tests around them. He knew his wife and she knew it would be another anxiety source for her. It would make her want to take one every month or every week. He didn't want her spiraling like that, so they said no test. If they needed it, they were going to get one. But without Em knowing, Dan got one and kept it hidden between his things. Having it there would be a lot faster than having to buy one, so he kept it there. “Sorry about that."

As he confessed it, Dan couldn't help but fear Em would be angry with him. But contrary to his fear and to remind him how much of a saint his wife was, Em just looked at him with nothing but love in her eyes. “You owe me a pizza after this.” 

“Anything you want.”

Em and Dan weren’t the kind of couple who peed in front of each other in bathrooms. They could count on one hand how many times they did it, awful covid days being most of those days. Dan has been there holding her hair and stroking her back on really sick or hangover days as Em kneeled down in front of the toilet to throw up, but that was a different story. Em did it with Dan too, but peeing was off the list of things to do in front of each other. Em always joked that they shouldn't kill romanticism by doing such a thing, but that morning they didn’t care. After Dan grabbed the pregnancy test that was carefully hidden in his suitcase, he stood alongside his wife in the bathroom. He promised to look to the other side, but he stayed there, his hand around her shoulders. 

That was one of the terrible moments when Dan had absolutely no idea what to do. He was out of words and he couldn’t help Em with anything. All he could do was stay there in silence, looking at his wife as she left the test over the sink and washed her hands. After that it was Em’s time to hide against Dan. She rested her face against his chest, taking deep breaths as they held each other. Even though he went to a Catholic school, Dan wasn’t a religious man. They didn’t have a religious ceremony and he couldn’t care less if they baptized their kids in the future. Religion wasn’t on his agenda, but as they waited inside their bathroom, Dan prayed for it to happen. He prayed to whatever was out there to let it happen to them, but especially to Em. His girl deserved all the happiness in the universe and he knew nothing would make her happier than knowing she was pregnant. There was nothing that would put a bigger smile on her face than knowing they were going to be parents and finally have their baby. Dan prayed that it was positive so he could fix all the wrong choices he made, so this time he could be there for his Emmy and their baby, not like he did all those months ago. 

When the timer on Em’s phone finally rang Dan could feel his heart beating so hard he was almost scared it would jump out of his chest. He could feel his hands starting to sweat and he didn’t want that. He couldn't be like that. He had to be Em’s rock if the result wasn’t what they wanted. He had to keep it together for his Emmy, so he took a deep breath and looked down at his wife. 

"Are you ready?" Dan asked, but the question wasn’t only for Em but also for himself. 

“Can you look first? Please?” Emmy begged, big brown eyes looking up at him. "I just can't do it. Not after last year."

“You know I love you, right? Whatever it says, I love you more than anyone or anything in the world. Nothing’s gonna change that.” He leaned down and kissed her forehead, then pulled away and smiled.

“I know. And I love you no matter what and more than anyone or anything in the whole universe. To the moon and to Saturn, right?” She smiled back and hugged him.

"To the moon and to Saturn three hundred times, baby girl." 

It was one last kiss before they did it. Dan paused, took a deep breath, kissed Em’s head and he turned slightly around, but he never let Em go. His arm stayed firmly and protectively around her waist, not only because Em needed it, but also because he needed it too. Dan needed Em as close as possible because she was his lifeline and the one thing keeping him standing there in that moment. As the last push, Dan decided to count to three, then grab the test. There was nothing complicated about it, or at least not that he could tell. It was a simple hand gesture and then the doubts would be out the window. One movement and that was all he needed to grab the test.

One. Two. Three. 

It took Dan all the courage in the world, but in return, a couple of lines said that from that moment on, their lives were changed forever. 

[callmewrinkles3]

One More Race

Note: We're back! Hope to have something more soon, but enjoy lovelies

She had no idea how Em slept that Thursday night at Spa, but she knew Dan probably didn’t. It was her thing to fall asleep with the rain falling outside, but it wasn’t something Dan loved. It was especially unfamiliar to Lulu. Sleeping with the rain hitting the roof of their motorhome brought constant noise that bothered both her husband and daughter, but Em slept like a baby. It has been difficult to sleep much lately. Between Luna and Dan racing, Em would mostly nap during race weekends. Spa was one of the races that never failed to take her sleep away. A lot of terrible things had happened there, and she was forced to witness her husband racing there, which made her hold him close every time she could. 

Em imagined that not only Dan but also Lulu woke up at night, that's why she woke up to her husband being the little spoon, all so he could hold Luna���s hand as they slept. Those first few moments of bliss and peace in the morning were her favorites. To wake up to see her daughter and husband sleeping peacefully only brought her joy and happiness. There was nothing Em wanted more than to stay there. She had her face buried against Dan’s back, his free hand thrown back to touch her leg, while Em’s hand was over his stomach. If they were alone and she had it her way, Em would wake him up in different funny ways, but Dan had practice and they had Lulu right beside them. 

Focusing on what was important and not overthinking was difficult. It was difficult after the previous weekend in Hungary. She didn't like walking into the paddock and facing her husband’s team. The positive thing was Blake and Charlie were back, which meant Charlie not moving from her side and ready to bite anyone who wanted to get near her girls. It was good having their best friends back when the week was craziness. The rumors and speculations were crazy, the texts and calls from journalists wanting to get a scoop on what was happening inside the Red Bull family. There were even some who tried to talk to Em about it, but all they heard was silence or a professional answer from Blake. 

It was hard to keep the noise away, but Em focused on her husband and daughter. They were what matter. Her husband having one last good weekend before the summer break was the important thing. 

She hated to give him the same old "I'm gonna love you no matter what talk”. They did it too many times. Even before they used the word “Love” she made sure to let him know she was there supporting him, and after all those years she was still there. That race could be the last chance to turn things around and she needed to remind him of her love for him. They had no idea what was gonna happen that Sunday or on Monday at Milton Keynes, and for some reason there was something yelling inside her that she needed to give him that reminder.

Em was delighted to see Dan doing well after qualifying. The conditions were tricky and the gaps between cars were practically nonexistent, so there wasn’t much he could do. Em was happy with a P13 as long as her husband was safe, but surprised by his calmness. Taking the chance to use that, Em decided to talk to him once he was back in the motorhome with her. Lulu was spending the night with Blake and Charlie, so it gave them extra time to talk and have a peaceful night of sleep.

“Finally in my favorite place in the world” Dan breathed, clothes off as soon as he reached the tiny little room that only had a bed spacious enough for him and Em. Like there was nothing more important in the world, he finally got to hide his face on her neck, tangling with each other as he did. “Why are you up? I thought you would be sleeping now. No husband and no baby, perfect timing for sleeping early."

“You know me, I don’t like getting to sleep without you, especially if Lu is not with me” she shrugged, kissing his forehead as she ran her fingers through his back and curls.

“I know you don’t. But look, one more race and then we'll head home for a good nap.” Dan reminded her as his arms wrapped around her waist. She knew she would have to send him to brush his teeth and put on his retainers before any one of them felt asleep, but two minutes of cuddling wouldn't hurt.

“You kind of owe me a nap and some cuddles on the couch with some soap opera that doesn’t include sports, Mr Ricciardo.” They both knew Em couldn’t care less. Em has never complained about the things Dan wanted to watch on tv. She couldn’t care less if he wanted to watch sports just like Dan never complained about her true crime stuff on TV. As long as there was a couch to cuddle on with her boy she was always happy. Now they just added their baby and some Bluey to the equation

“I promise it’ll happen. We’re gonna kick jetlag with couch, cuddles and Baby Shark” Dan smiled against her neck, scratching her skin with his stubble.

“I know it will. But we'll cheat and put on some good old Scooby Doo. Maybe she won’t realize.” As the giggles ended, Dan moved from one of his favorite spots to look at her. Not one time did she not melt when she looked at her husband. Her breath was always taken away by his huge brown eyes, and seven years later it hadn't changed. The fact that their daughter had the same eyes made it even more magical. A smile spread across her face as his hand slid along her body to move her closer to have a kiss with her, which made her heart jump for joy. “You know I love you, right?” 

“I know. I love you like crazy.” They whispered between soft, gentle kisses, moving away only the necessary to talk.

“I know you do. Can I tell you something?”

“You know you can tell me anything."

“I probably shouldn’t but I- I know tomorrow it’s kind of a big deal, but just go fast. Do your thing, go as fast as you can, remind those dogs, and come back to us so we can get home. Whatever happens happens. And whatever comes next we will love you no matter what. Your babies will be by your side no matter what.”

Em knew she really shouldn’t have said that, no when the pressure was on his shoulders, not before bed, no when he probably didn’t need to hear it. But she had to say it to him. She needed to remind him that it was not about racing. It wasn't about his work. She needed to give him one last reminder so he would know it was all gonna be alright no matter what. Either if he stayed at RB, moved to Red Bull or if they just went home, it would be fine. It was gonna be them together and in the end that was all that mattered.

The way his eyes shined as her words hit him told Em all she needed to know. The look on his face was worth more than a thousand words. But even when it was not necessary, Dan spoke again. "No trophy, championship, or prize will ever be as incredible as having you and Lu. Ever. Nothing will ever come close. I’ll go fast for you. I’ll kick asses for you and baby Moon. I promise I’ll make you proud, Wrinkles.”

She knew they needed to get ready for bed and go to sleep, but one last make out session before sleeping wouldn't hurt anyone. As Em kissed her husband and reminded him between whispers that she would be proud of him no matter what, she also reminded herself that it was just two days. Two days and they could go home. Two days, then they would see.

[callmewrinkles3]

Lulu

December 15, 2023

Some people said that Lulu was going to be late and be born on the 24th like the Christmas present she was. And because there was a bet that her middle name would be Noelle if it was. Charlie said that she'd be a good swiftie like her Mama and come on the 13th to share a birthday with the queen herself. But Blake was the one who came closest, saying she'd ruin everyone's bets on one column of the "Dan and Em are having a baby" betting pool by coming whenever she wanted. And in true Ricciardo fashion, Luna Grace appeared the one day that nobody had bet on.

It was the same as every night since Dan had gotten back from Abu Dhabi, Em cuddling against her husband while he rubbed her sore lower back. They knew they were into the last few nights as just two of them instead of three and they took advantage of it. Everything seemed as normal as Em thought it was, a low ache coming and going in her back. Her body was sore and out of room. Lulu needed to get ready to leave because her mum felt like she was about to burst before her due date arrived in five days.

But even with her discomfort things were good. They were really good. Charlie and Blake were in their own little engaged couple world after Blake's proposal on their anniversary. Their family was healthy and Dan could close his little finger almost fully now. He was happy and excited about going back to work in January. And Em was happier than she thought she could be.

Her head was in a good place, Mildred helping her prepare to be a mother and have her daughter. Mentally she was better than she'd been in most of her life. And she'd never admit it to Dan, probably never to anyone, but finding out that Michael wasn't going to be in the paddock next year gave her an extra peace of mind. So of course, just as she was starting to drift off to sleep, Lulu decided she was making her appearance.

Dan knew that people thought he was insane for not being scared to drive some of the fastest cars in the world for a living, or go dirt biking or mountain biking along forest trails. He was an adrenaline lover who enjoyed getting scared at least once a month. Even when Em asked him to not scare her. But the moment she looked up at him with big eyes and said she was in labour Dan could feel the panic creeping in.

He'd thought that Blake and Charlie staying with them until Em gave birth was insane. That they didn't need them there, as appreciative as they were. But Blake had insisted that Dan would freak the fuck out when it happened and he didn't want Dan driving Em to hospital alone. He'd insisted he was fine and didn't need it. But then when it happened he was so grateful that they were there. He just helped Em out, holding her hand as contractions happened and did whatever she needed to feel safe until they made it to the hospital.

From the first time he'd met her Dan knew Emmy was a force of nature. He'd known about the inner strength she had, but seeing her that early morning as she gritted her teeth and pushed was something he could never describe. He couldn't find the words to explain how it felt to watch her bringing their daughter into the world. After everything they'd been through together and on their own, after the year before putting herself together following her breakdown and making herself get better. She went through hell and crawled her way back and stopped Dan from drowning in his own emotions. She did all of that. She carried their daughter and kept her safe even when their plans for the year got turned upside down and they went back to travelling the world. Emmy did it with grace and poise and beauty, making it look easy when Dan knew it wasn't.

She said she was fine when he knew she was sore and wanted to take a deep breath and not need to pee every two minutes. Dan knew better than anyone how terrified she was. Her fear about not being a good mum. In the dark of night curled up against him admitting her fears about not being physically able to push their daughter out of her body and into the world. Admitting that yeah, she was scared about how it would hurt and she wasn't afraid to admit that she wanted an epidural as soon as it was possible. And even during all of that, she made it look easy, filling Dan with pride for his wife. He held out his hand for her to push and she forced him around the other side of the bed because she was afraid to hurt his left hand. Because even when she was in labour she looked after him instead of it being the other way round.

That entire night felt like watching a video at double speed. It was intense and he was holding Em's hand and pulling her hair back from her face, but the second he heard their daughter cry it was like everything just stopped. In full Ricciardo spirit Lulu entered the word with a loud cry to announce herself. It echoed around the room, bouncing around his ears and landing into his heart because that was his daughter and she was right there.

There was a list of things that Dan would never forget even if he tried. The first two were the most important moments of his relationship with Em. Seeing his Emmy for the first time was number one, arriving at Blake's with a shy smile and a bottle of wine in her hand, sitting next to him in her little black dress with long brown hair running down her back. Secondly was arriving home in Monaco to see her sandwiched between his parents. How she was too skinny and too pale and had clearly been crying but she was there and even with all the changes to both of them she still fit into his arms. The way he held onto her like she'd disintegrate and she grabbed him too.

After that were smaller moments that were no less important. When he saw her on their wedding days, her gorgeous dresses and shy smiles and the way she said "I do" without hesitation or fear. The first time he saw her holding Isaac or Isabella. They day on the couch in Perth when she fell asleep in his arms with Isaac against her chest and his head screamed love her love her love her love her. The look on her face when the pregnancy test came back positive in LA, that she really was pregnant.

The list could have gone on forever, but now sliding in straight at number one was the first time he laid eyes on his daughter. The night had felt like minutes instead of hours, but in the early dawn light Luna was born and time slowed down. His Emmy was a mum and everyone could know. The world could know that she was one and he was so fucking happy about it. After all the tears and pain and sadness and worry it was replaced by pure peace. His Emmy was a mum.

It was surreal to watch Em sit up in the bed with the help of pillows and take her daughter in her arms. It was like they were meant to be there and he was just the lucky man who got to love both of them as hard as he could. He was the one they chose because he was completely and utterly theirs. It was magical. Everything he'd done before wasn't as important because now she was there and he got to spend his life loving the two girls sitting on the bed in front of him. The tiny human in the lavender blanket and hat that her Mama had made for her over the last few weeks was going to grow up in front of him and he couldn't wait to see who she became.

One of the other bets that almost everyone put money on was Lulu's weight and height. Everyone expected her to be small and take after Em, but they were all entirely wrong. She was beautiful and healthy with dark hair already peeking out from her tiny hat, but the nurse confirmed she was four and a bit kilos which made Dan smile, already longer than average. He didn't know how he loved her so much already but he did.

"Ready to hold her, Dad?" Em asked, his jaw dropping as he looked at his wife and his daughter.

"I'm her dad. Holy fuck I'm her dad and you're her mum." Emmy giggled at his words, holding her arms out for him to take that precious bundle into his own. She fit there perfectly and his world turned upside down in seconds as the gravity hit him. His daughter.

"Hey Lulu. I'm your dad. And we are so excited that you're here. Thanks for waiting for me to get home, Sweetheart."

In that moment he felt exactly the same way he did when he got to hold Em in his arms for the first time. He didn't want to let her go ever again. Something in him told him that this moment would change his life and it was exactly the same now.

"I love you so much, baby girl. So, so much. Welcome to the world." He pushed a kiss to her so soft cheek, cursing the tears that were welling up for blurring his view of her face. It was forever carved into his memory, tiny lips pursed.

If Dan thought that letting Em go when she was going back to Perth and he had to go to Australia was hard, he was wrong compared to giving his daughter to the midwife. She was still in the room, they could see and hear her, but she needed to be checked over by the nurse. It broke his heart for the few minutes, but instead he focused on Em and wiped away the happy tears she'd let out at seeing them. Her hair got re-braided to keep it out of her face and he told her just how proud he was of her. She was the strongest, most badass human he'd ever known and he couldn't believe how lucky he was to get to share a life with her. He kissed her face and thanked her, repeating words of love as his wife said them right back until their daughter was safely in their arms again.

He knew he needed to go tell his parents that Em and Lulu were safe and healthy but he couldn't leave them. It wasn't until they'd been brought back to the comfort of their little room that he was ok with leaving Em for a moment. It was a nod to the nurse on guard duty to stop strangers getting into the maternity ward as he went out to the waiting room. Blake and Charlie were sitting waiting beside his parents as the four stood up for news. Congratulations, hugs and tears met Dan as he told them that Luna Ricciardo was there safe and well, and Emmy was fine. Sore and she'd be tired, but fine.

Grace and Joe went down to get coffee for everyone in the early morning, promising to come back with whatever cheesy goodness they could find for Em. While they were gone Dan took uncle Blake and auntie Charlie to meet their baby niece. It was as quiet as possible entering the room to not disturb either a sleeping newborn or new mother, but Em smiled and said hi as they entered. The new adults came to give Em a hug and congratulations while Dan picked his daughter up from the bedside crib she'd been placed in. He supported her head in the crook of his elbow as he walked slowly over to their friends, introducing the newest member of their family.

"Ok Lu, these are some pretty important people so best behaviour, yeah? This is your auntie Charlie and your uncle Blake. They're two of the people you can rely on the most in the world, it's why we picked them to be your godparents. They're pretty special like you."

"Oh my God look at her. Guys, she's beautiful," Blake whispered as he held his arms out to take the baby. Lulu grasped his finger with her tiny hand while he settled her down. "Thank God she looks like you, Timmy. Pretty like her mum."

"Hey Lulu, you're so - wait. Repeat what you just said?" Charlie's gazze went straight from Lulu to Dan and Em as she took in what Dan had said. They hadn't told her she was going to be Lulu's godmother. Godfather was an easy choice, it was always going to be Blake and he'd known since he knew about the pregnancy, but it took months to decide who would be godmother. And in the end it was an easy decision. They'd only known her a year but Charlie had been a rock. They knew if anything happened she'd be there, and even if she didn't need to raise Lulu she'd be a friend and comfort and support. If anything happened to the two of them the papers were all written out, Blake and Charlie knew they'd raise Lulu. It was the perfect decision.

"I know you've a bunch of nieces and nephews and you're godmother to some of them, so I figured another one wouldn't be a problem?" Em forced herself to shrug, acting like it wasn't a big deal when in reality it meant everything to every single person in that room.

"Wanna hold her when your fiance stops hogging the baby?" Dan asked, looking straight at Charlie. His wife's best friend was wiping tears away while she stared at Lulu.

"Are you sure?" The unasked second part of "about making me her godmother" hung in the air.

"Hundred percent."

Dan watched his friends hold the newest love of her life while he put an arm around his wife's shoulders and waited for his parents to come back in. For the first time in almost three years things felt right.

[callmewrinkles3]

Netflix.

September 2018.

Packing for two weeks away felt absolutely insane, but Em was squishing clothes into the beat up suitcase she'd owned for years. She'd need to find somewhere to do laundry in Austin, but it would work. She couldn't turn down Dan's excited face when he asked her if she wanted to come to Austin for the race. And then when he insisted that if she was going all that way she had to come to Mexico too. That she'd love the food and the atmosphere. So she packed.

Hearing Dan's voice stopped her in her tracks. The season of House of Cards that she'd been watching had finished, advertisements were playing, and there was Dan's voice coming out of her speakers. She shouldn't have been surprised really, she'd fallen for his charm faster than the entire Drive to Survive team had. How could she blame anyone with how irresistible he was? Dan was handsome as hell and had the most contagious smile in the universe so people liked him immediately.

Her one worry was that she didn't like cameras. And yes, Daniel Ricciardo was the guy sleeping in her bed as good as every night they were on the same continent, but she didn't want people to know who she was. She'd managed to mostly stay in the shadows at the races she'd been to so far and it had worked. With Dan's engine giving up the way it had people were too busy watching Mercedes rather than Red Bull. She knew it was hard to do when the guy basically living with her was a huge extrovert, and she was still an introvert who didn't like spending time around lots of people. She wasn't ready to change that and she wasn't ready to let her anonymity go. And the hardest part, she didn't want certain people to know that Dan was in her life.

Dan wasn't the problem. She knew that. Dan and Blake were two of the best things that had ever happened in her life. But the problem was other people she knew. She didn't want her parents to know about Dan, to ask questions and judge. Or worse, take advantage of the situation. She'd seen how they were when Michael even just said he worked in motorsports, her dad's eyes light up and start talking about the sponsorships his company did. She wanted to run from her past and not risk it destroying her future.

She had no idea how to ask Dan that she wanted to keep it like that. She didn't know how to tell him that she wanted to be kept away from the cameras and everything. They were flying to Austin in two days and Dan was going to be the usual beautiful man he was with an outfit that he was keeping close to his chest. She wanted to adore him from afar until she could do it in the privacy of the hotel room they were going to end up sharing. Em wanted to keep their secret to herself as much as she could. Even when some days she wanted to scream from the rooftops that her bed smelled like him and her tiny apartment was basically home. And maybe one day she could do that if she was very, very lucky.

She couldn't let herself be distracted from her task. She needed to finish packing and then start dinner to have with her athletic friend-slash-roommate-friend with benefits. But then there were hands on her hips, lips trailing across her shoulders.

"They told me that there's some handsome guy on that show. Dunno if he's an actor or something?" She could feel him smiling against her skin, the distraction almost impossible to fold the shirt that was in her hands. Really she had no idea how she could complete any task when he was wrapped around her.

"Oh yeah? What's his name?" Em asked surprised, giving into his charm and leaning back against his body. The pink tee was abandoned on the bed.

"DR3."

"That's a name? Sounds fake." It was nearly a struggle to keep her tone even.

"He's as real as you get." She wanted to say yes. She wanted to give into the hands moving under her shirt slowly, to the flickers of need he was starting with her. But there were too many things still to do before they left London. Her list was terrifyingly long and stopping for sex wasn't a part of it. "I can show you just how real he is."

"After packing." She was giving in a little, as much as she hoped she could avoid it. She could hear the grumbles between kisses from Dan. "Don't worry, I'm almost done. And I was thinking stew for dinner? I've got loads of veggies to pad it out and make it fit your diet."

"I'd cheat on my diet for you, don't worry." It was punctuated with kisses.

"You know the deal, as long as your hips don't go anywhere I'm all good." She couldn't contain a smile from appearing on her face at wanting to give herself a pat on the back for being able to admit how much she loved his hips, even if the teams had wondered if he should have them.

"They're there any time you need 'em, I'm around all week except for the race stuff. And Thursday, Netflix are around that day."

"Speak of the devil, can we talk about something?"

"Netflix? What about it?" Dan asked, kissing her head as Em turned around to look at him. It didn't take much for Dan to sit down, Em pulled into his lap and arms around her waist. "Want your big break there?"

"That's the exact opposite of what I want. I just...look, I know it's literally part of your job description but can I just not be there when they're around? I want to stay just being Em. Having my name spread all over Netflix isn't something that interests me. Doesn't sound very exciting to me." She tried to keep herself chilled out as if it wasn't a big deal. She knew Dan would agree. There was no way he'd say no when it was something related to her privacy and safety, but she was nervous anyway. But before she could get too in her head he gave her the sweetest kiss on the cheek.

"You don't even have to worry about it. I figured you wouldn't want to be, so I asked them to not have a camera in the car to the track and that. They were good with it, I'm their singing monkey for enough time."

"You are the absolute best, thank you." She kissed him gently and held on for a few minutes before she had to go back to packing. She had no idea how she'd gotten so lucky, but she'd be forever thankful that she had.

[callmewrinkles3]

Deal.

July 2018

Em still wasn't sure why she'd agreed to do this. She could have left. She could have walked away and pretended that Dan never sent that text, that she'd leave Dan alone and pretend they'd never met. That Monaco never happened. It would have made her life easier.

But Dan had actually called her and she couldn't turn him down over the phone. And without thinking she told him to meet her at her favourite cafe in Ealing, close to where she'd been to uni. So she was sitting there trying to get some work done before he arrived. She'd nearly texted him to go to the Pret down the street, somewhere unfamiliar, but she deleted the message. A familiar place would be better for her nerves, Sue grinning and starting her latte as she walked in and asking how Em was and what she was doing.

She sat in the corner with her coffee and a chicken sandwich that Ron handed her with a smile and a greeting. She'd have loved to say that she didn't notice Dan walking in, but she did immediately. It was too small to not notice someone arrive, but that curly hair was too much to ignore. He came straight across to her with his broad smile and she couldn't help but return it.

"Hey Emmy, what're you drinking? I'll get one."

"Caramel latte, just tell Sue it's for me and she'll know." It took five minutes before he was back, one of the little trays in his hands carrying everything. There was a coffee for each of them, a blueberry muffin for her and a noodle salad for Dan, with a slice of cake in between them on the table to share.

"The woman at the counter said this is your favourite, is that right? I guess you come here often."

"Yeah, I used to work here in uni. Still pull shifts if they need a hand and I have time." Em took a sip of her coffee, smiling at the taste. "Congrats on France, by the way. And happy birthday, I hope it's a good year for you."

"Thanks, we're doing drinks after Silverstone for it. At least I got to finish the race this time! Plus some good points. But how are you? How was the last few weeks?"

She paused, trying to work out how to make it sound more fun than it had been. "You know, the usual. Working, making sure Blake's apartment doesn't fall apart while he's running around the world."

They both took a bite in the awkward silence that had fallen between them and Em waited for him to speak. It had never been awkward between them before.

"I owe you an apology." It was the most serious she'd ever heard him before.

"Dan-"

"No, Emmy, please. I owe you one. I shouldn't have just ignored you, that was wrong and I'm sorry. I know it doesn't fix it but I didn't mean to. Yeah I was busy, but I shouldn't have. I promise I didn't want to. Work was insane and with the way my schedule is I didn't want to bother you when you have enough going on." She watched him take a few seconds to work out how to phrase what he wanted to say and let him pause. "I'm sorry. It wasn't a one night stand, and you're my friend. I don't want us to lose any of what we have."

"You don't need to apologise, Dan. We both did it."

"Yeah but I w-"

"Look, Dan, I still want to be your friend. I still want to hang out with you and spend time with you when you have it, and we both know you don't have much." She took a breath to get the rest of what she needed to say out, "But I don't think we should sleep together anymore. You mean a hell of a lot to me, and if we keep sleeping together we're going to fuck up eventually. We can be friends though, right?"

"Yeah. Friends." The smile on his face didn't fully reach his eyes and that hurt Em, but she knew it was the right call. And if he didn't want to be her friend he could fade out of her life. It'd be fine. They stayed quiet eating for a few moments.

"So you're coming to Silverstone, right? I organised a hotel room for you."

"Dan..."

"I have your pass!" He pulled four passes from his jacket, lanyards wrapped around the neatly stacked batch. "You don't have to take a flight this time. Please? As my birthday present?"

"I have your birthday present, actually. It's not much, but here." Em felt so silly pulling it out of her bag. The book was carefully wrapped in blue paper. She'd seen Jack Brabham's autobiography in her favourite second hand book shop the week after Monaco and picked it up. Trying to think of a birthday present felt impossible for the man who could have it all. Now sitting in front of him it felt ridiculous to give a Formula One driver a book about one? Stupid. But Dan was opening it so she couldn't take it away.

"It's for me?" Dan asked, oblivious to Em's internal freak out. "Emmy you didn't have to."

"It's nothing. Like seriously, it's nothing. I don't even know what I was thinking when I got it, but you said you wanted to start reading more and I thought it'd be nice."

She took a sip of her drink and looked down at the table for a moment, wanting to give him a couple of moments to act like he was happy instead of just seeing disappointment on his face. Why did she think this was a good idea? Stupid. Stupid.

"You saw this and thought of me?" He smiled as he held it up. A real smile.

"I mean Australian, driver, it made sense in my head. I know it was a stupid idea."

"Emmy it's perfect. I love it. Thank you, seriously. Dad used to tell me stories about watching him drive when he was a kid, he'll love me saying I have this. I love it."

"Glad you like it." She smiled shyly, picking off a piece of muffin to pop into her mouth. "Can I think about the race?"

It was absolutely a lie. She knew she'd say yes. She knew it. There was nothing those brown eyes couldn't make her do.

"Of course you can. But if it helps in any way, I have to say I'd love to see you there." Dan insisted. As much as Em hated to admit it her heart began to melt just a little bit.

[callmewrinkles3]

Home

September 2021

"Emmy?"

"Yeah?"

"Would you ever live somewhere that wasn't London?"

Dan's words were quiet as they lay curled up on the couch together watching some comedy show on Channel4. Em wasn't totally paying attention to it while they lay on the almost too small couch. It was a stupidly simple question on the outside but in reality there were so many layers.

She was fully focused on turning the idea around in her head, her thoughts consumed by it instead of the show and Dan's fingers tracing invisible patterns against her skin. She knew he wasn't doing it to distract her really, it was to ground himself and remind him that he was right there. She could have joked that it was thanks to him winning Monza but she wouldn't. Instead she pressed her lips to his forehead and ran her fingers through his curls when he held her tightly.

Part of her wanted to laugh at how clingy Dan had become, but part of her was nervous. As the world wanted more and more of the most recent Grand Prix winner he wanted to spend his time with her. He was the extrovert out of the two of them but he was the one who kept wanting to hide. Even having won wasn't enough for McLaren. She knew there were people calling his win a fluke, saying Lando deserved it. That trophy was a plaster on a bullet hole and there was nothing she could to do fix it for him.

She knew it was weird when Dan kept complaining about how his win had ruined their holiday plans in Italy. He kept saying how sorry he was that he couldn't take her to the villa he'd rented for them on Lake Como for a couple of days of sun and relaxing and sex instead of celebrating his win. Em didn't blame him. She couldn't blame him. After what had happened between her and McLaren that week, his mood for most of the weekend, and the fact that his family wasn't there to celebrate with him in the country he loved nearly as much as Australia she knew it was a bittersweet feeling. She knew it was strange and he wasn't ok so she did what she knew best. She held onto him, kept him safe and sound and grounded in her arms. They snuggled up together whenever they could, legs and arms wrapped around each other. And preferably no clothes on when they could get away with it.

"What?" Em asked like she hadn't fully heard the question. She had, but she needed a few seconds to think about exactly how to phrase an answer and not blurt out that she'd move anywhere with him.

"Do you think you'll wanna live in London forever?" Dan repeated, pushing a soft kiss to her shoulder before continuing. "I mean you love the sun. I know you like the rain too but y'know. I mean. Maybe in the future? Would you move somewhere else?"

She'd spent three years by his side and it had taught her a lot about him. One of the things she'd learned was how to tell when Dan was asking something but meant something else. She could feel the slight tension in his body and the hesitation in his voice. She could feel how he was overthinking what he was saying and how to ask something important. He was doubting himself so she tried to give him a little push to tell her everything.

"I mean I love London, but my three favourite crazy men are from Australia so I don't know. There isn't anything to really tie me here I think? Why are you asking?"

Everyone who knew her knew that she loved London and it wasn't something new. It was the first ever place that she'd felt free and been able to be herself. The first place she'd ever called home and it would always have a place in her heart. She'd had her heart broken and bruised and fallen in love in this city, and she would always like being there.

But Perth had captivated her heart and soul since she'd first been there. It was like going home was supposed to feel according to the books. She loved every part of the city and it felt awful when she walked into international departures and had to leave, part of her heart being left behind. It was leaving home when she didn't want to leave. It had become her home, even over lockdown and all that entailed. It was even better because she had a family there now and it was Dan's home.

"Just curious." She could tell that Dan wasn't telling the truth. Not fully, anyway. He had a question that he wasn't yet ready to ask her and she wasn't sure if she was ready to bring it up. So she could leave it.

"You know I'll follow you anywhere if that's what you're worrying about. We promised, right?" Her question was just as simple as his was and it had the same effect. He stopped and looked at her for a second before leaning down to kiss her properly, the two of them moving to be comfortable while they made out. That morning in the hotel in Monza they'd made a deal to never leave the other alone, and she'd follow him everywhere not to break it. And she knew he'd do the same thing.

[callmewrinkles3]

Plans

October 2018

He was finally back exactly where he wanted to be. The double header was hard, timezones sucking. At least he’d been close to Max in Suzuka but the less said about Sochi the better. More engine penalties and quali failures thanks to the shit that was the RB14. He was counting down the four races that were left. And Emmy was coming to Texas at least which made it even better. Him and his girl in Austin.

Emmy has giggled at him when he made it back to her place after sneaking back down the street with his two cases. One of them was mostly filled with stuff he’d brought her back from Japan, a trip to the Pokémon Centre in Tokyo worth the looks that Michael had given him. The way she cuddled her jigglypuff like she’d never had a stuffed toy before was worth it. And her smile was the best he’d seen in so long.

All he wanted was to be curled up in this bed, Em’s arms around him as her head was on his chest. It felt like home. But this time his head was against her, his face buried in her neck as she ran her fingers through his curls. Even with two good race results the season had been one failure after another. If racing was all he was living for he’d be miserable. At least this year he had someone else. He wanted to go back to Perth. He wasn’t fighting for anything. Sixth was as good as sewn up. What did they need him for? Go home for Christmas and see everyone in person instead of through a screen.

But he didn’t know what Em was doing for the holidays. Last year was spent in Liverpool and she looked miserable in the one selfie she’d sent him. Knowing her the way he did now he could see how her smile was fake. Her eyes didn’t sparkle. She was clearly miserable and he wanted her to enjoy them the same way he did.

She didn’t have the same relationship he did with his family, or even close to it. Michael had gone to the first Liverpool match of the season with her during the summer break, he’d mentioned how they left her parents after ten minutes. He didn’t say anything else and neither did Em.

He watched how they didn’t really talk to them. She’d text occasionally, had called them once in all the time she’d spent with him. Those interactions always left her quiet and unwilling to talk about them. She was upset but would never say it, so Dan just held her while they put something on tv to take their minds off it. He thought it helped.

Meanwhile he barely went two days without FaceTiming his family. Now that Isaac wasn’t a potato and understood what was going on he’d call Michelle so he could talk to his nephew. The days he didn’t call her he called his parents. And whenever possible at least once a week he was out to Nat’s to see his godson. Em had come once, and watching her and Natalie chat while he played with Wilfy was more fun than he thought it could be. She fit in so easily and his mind kept turning to the what if.

What if she came to Perth for Christmas. Would it really be that big a deal? His mum had already been asking him if she was coming to Abu Dhabi and when they’d get to see her again, and he knew his parents realised his calls were from Em’s more than his own place. He just had to ask her.

“Hey Emmy?” He looked up at her, waiting for a response.

“Yeah?”

“Wanna spend Christmas in Perth?” Dan felt her stiffen around him, her breath catching before she blew out slowly. Please say yes, please say yes.

“I don’t want to be rude. Your family has all the stuff you do.”

“And Mum asked when she’ll see you again. She’d love you to be there. Come spend it in Perth rather than be stupid cold here?”

“Let me think?” She smiled as she spoke and Dan pulled her closer, pressing open mouth kisses to her neck and collarbone as he twisted them around in bed.

Emmy was cooking lunch while he was on the couch, staring at data from Suzuka. The room was filling with the smell of onion and garlic and he waited for his Mum to call.

“Beef or chicken? I was thinking of making stir fry, I’ve got both. Is teriyaki good for you?”

“Beef? And that sounds amazing, didn’t get the chance to have any in Japan. I’ll take you to this really good place when you finally make it out to Suzuka. They do great ramen.”

“Sounds good. Fifteen minutes!”

His phone buzzed on the table as the photo of his mum came up on screen. Dan answered it, grinning at her.

“Hey Mum. Dad there?” He waved and saw her smile grow too.

“He’s just coming now. How’re you doing? You still at Em’s?”

“Yup, say hi Emmy!” He held the phone out for her to wave over, calling hi to his mother. Dan went to put the phone back but he could hear her talking.

“I was asking Daniel, are you coming for Christmas? We’ve been planning but I never asked, and knowing my son he wouldn’t even ask until Abu Dhabi. Did you have plans?”

“Eh, just my parents. I think. I haven’t checked with them yet. It’s been a couple of weeks.” Em’s voice went quiet as she stirred, Dan coming over to sit on the counter and hold the phone up by her.

“Well we want you here. I’ll plan like you’re coming until you say you’re not, deal?”

“Thanks, Grace. Hey Joe, how are you.”

Dan watched his girl chat with his parents, just chiming in every few moments. It wasn’t until he ended the call as Em was dishing up their food that she looked at him smiling.

“So. Tell me more about Perth at Christmas.”

He couldn’t help but lean over and kiss her nose, pulling her in for the briefest proper kiss before separating and smiling.

“It’s warm and we usually do a barbecue and go swimming. It’s just chill. And you won’t need a blanket or a hoodie.”

“It sounds pretty nice.”

“Especially for a pretty girl.” He watched her bring their food over, gesturing for him to come over to eat. Dan followed her, knowing already that he’d follow her to the end of the world.

[callmewrinkles3]

One Day Soon

May 2018

He'd finally won Monaco, and it was awesome. It was even better winning it with Seb fighting him every second and a wounded car. He was just glad that Simon hadn't told him exactly what was wrong. If he'd known he wouldn't have made it to the line.

The podium celebration and being up there with Seb and Lewis was fun, the Prince handing him a trophy and doing a shoey up there. But somehow nothing felt as good as waking up in that hotel room with Em curled up around him. The best part of his weekend wasn't winning, it wasn't the gala and then party held in his honour. It was that he finally had the guts to kiss Em and he left that party with the most beautiful girl he'd met holding his hand.

The week before he was convinced that he'd leave the party with a random girl whose name he wouldn't remember after a night where he was handed massive amounts of alcohol. He thought he'd end up with a fun night, a fun but forgettable ending, and an awkward morning leaving a generic hotel room without offending a stranger. But it was Emmy.

The woman who had been living rent free in his head for literal months. Who made him smile every time he'd gotten a text from Wrinkles. Even his coworkers had been asking about her, a sly slagging from the mechanics when they met her in Barcelona and asking was that his friend he'd been smiling at. She'd made him lose interest in every single woman who wasn't her just from a simple smile.

Instead of the awkward morning after conversation where he tried to remember a name, he woke up to Em beginning to move in his arms, pushing a kiss to her temple. It was an "oh shit" and a giggle when Michael called him while they were having sex again and he was desperate to keep going. Emmy insisted she needed a shower because they smelled like each other, and he used it as an excuse because one night wasn't going to be enough and he was taking full advantage of everything he'd get with her.

Going back to reality fucking sucked. They had to leave her luxurious hotel room - that he was unashamed to admit he'd lied to her about and said it was all that was left at the Fairmont - and go back to just being friends. It was nearly impossible to not take her hand as they were walking out of the hotel. He wanted to pull her into a hug and hide his face in her neck to push a kiss to her instead of a brief half hug. He was already dreading not getting to spend the night with her again.

Instead he had to settle for having her for little moments during the day while everyone was there. He got to see her chatting with his parents, laughing like they'd known each other for years instead of only a few days. She'd already been asked to be in Abu Dhabi so they could spend more than a day or two together. He'd never admit how much it meant to him that his parents clearly liked her.

He brought her to the celebration brunch on his Vespa feeling Em holding onto his waist as he drove. Every single red light she leaned against him and squeezed as he started again. He got to play footsie with her under the table, watching as she smiled when his foot ran against her leg and she pretended it was from Mike's really bad joke. He listened to her insist that she paid for her snacks at the market because "you've spent too much money on me with the flights and my hotel room. You don't need to pay for some crisps and snacks." He got to steal a kiss when nobody was looking and watch her shocked smile when he did.

But more importantly he got to spend a full two extra days with her after everyone else left to go back to their lives. He'd insisted that there was no point in her staying in a hotel room alone when his spare room was free, and Em didn't want him to have to keep paying for it. So she moved her little case of clothes in that evening nad he tried to keep it friendly with her. Tried, anyway.

Em made dinner for them, they ate while they were listening to music and talking about the view over the Mediterranean Sea and anything that wasn't to do with his job. The conversation kept going while he did the dishes and she sat on the countertop to stay talking. It was a goodnight kiss on her cheek, Em saying she was exhausted after the hike they'd done in the hills that morning.

He watched her walk into her temporary room, the door closing with a soft click and Dan wanted to open it and go into her. Give him another minute or two of having Em in his arms and pretend he'd be ok with that. But instead he went into his room, closed the door and tried to forget that Emmy was in the other room.

Dan tried. He really, really tried, but he failed miserably. Not even half an hour later he was standing outside her door holding his hand up to knock. It was soft, not wanting to wake her if she was actually asleep.

"Come on in, Dimples." His heart gave a jump of happiness when he heard her speak, opening the door and seeing her sitting cross legged in the middle of the bed. Her laptop was in between her knees and he tried not to look at her bare legs. That was almost as impossible as stopping his heart from racing when she smiled up at him.

As he focused on her face he realised the one flaw in his plan. He had no idea what he was going to ask her. He always had a response, always had a funny answer or a one liner and now he was completely tongue tied. All Dan could do was look at her with what felt like a stupid smile on his face. He had been slowly falling for her but now that he'd gotten a night with her he knew he was a goner.

When the words finally came to him he cracked a grin, watching as Emmy smiled at him.

"Can I come in? Just for cuddles, I mean it." Em laughed almost too loudly in the quiet of the room, closing down her laptop and setting it on the floor beside the bed before patting the mattress beside her. He honestly meant to keep his word that it would just be cuddles, but they snuggled in and her face was beside his and he couldn't help pushing his lips against hers. They made jokes in between soft kisses about how they were pushing the limits of what could be considered cuddles but he didn't care.

Part of him wished that that night in his spare room was their first night together. He'd never complain about that first night they had because it was fun and exciting and the way she sounded when she came made him was priceless. But he wished he was sober the first time he heard her moaning his name. He wished he didn't have a hangover as he was watching her get dressed and pretend he hadn't been kissing her chest all night. So now that he had his second chance he was taking it.

There were going to be even more jokes about what they considered cuddles as he flipped Em over, his arms either side of her head as his knee slid between her legs. He was absorbing the feeling of having Em around him. Everything was her lips against his skin, her fingers holding every single piece of him she could grab as he kissed bruises into her skin, her soft voice begging his name between moans that he could never erase from his memory. Every single part of him was soaking in the memories just in case it never happened again. He would never forget the feeling of her warmth around him, his brain screaming mine mine mine mine because how could anyone compare to her?

Nobody made him smile as widely as she did when she was giggling and joking about how he just said he wanted cuddles while she was out of breath. He'd never followed anyone to his room - never brought anyone to his room in this apartment - the way he followed her, joking that his bed was more comfortable than the spare one, and Em saying she'd take the couch if he didn't want to share. And then he pulled her into the bed as she giggled.

He'd won fucking Monaco less than 48 hours ago and he felt even more powerful the way she admitted her legs were killing her, and not just because of the hike they did. But even with that half an hour later she was the one on top.

But even beyond that - beyond the jokes and the laughs and the mindblowing sex - he was never as happy as when he woke up by her side in his bed. Not even when they shared bowls of pasta at his favourite trattoria just over the border. She was a dream by his side, long messy hair spread across his chest and her face relaxed just inches from him. His favourite part of it wasn't even her naked body against him, but her hand resting on his chest as his arm was pulling her closer to him even in her sleep. It was so simple and wonderful and he couldn't explain it.

And she was leaving. That afternoon he had to drop her to the airport to fly back to London and he was staying in Monaco and he fucking hated it. He wanted to go back with her. Wanted to be with her and be more than friends and spend his week with her. But not yet.

He wanted her to be sure. He didn't want the glitz and glamour of Monaco and his job and everything to make a huge difference with them. Not that he thought she would, his Emmy wouldn't, but his world was too weird. He wanted her to be sure she was ready to jump in. Maybe not this week. maybe not even this month. But he knew what they had was special and he couldn't wait to see how they'd work it out.

[callmewrinkles3]

Morning

April 2023

Crazy curls. Familiar snores. Warm skin against hers. Everything felt soft that morning. The sheets covering them, the noise from outside the bedroom windows, and even the light coming through the curtains. There was some sense of calmness filling her. Suddenly the world didn’t feel so heavy on her shoulders. There was some sort of relaxation inside her. Somehow it felt like freedom. Em knew the right word was 'Happiness'. She was happy.

The world finally knew Daniel was her husband. It was finally public that they were married, so there were no longer any doubts that they belonged to each other. They belonged to each other from the beginning. They had been married for months, but now it was official for everyone else. Now Em could yell it from the rooftops and wear her wedding ring without the fear of someone spotting it. She could wear it in her left hand proudly and not in her right one to make it look like it was just another random one in her large collection of rings. She didn’t have to hide in a chain around her neck, keeping it safe and close to her heart. After months and months and months of biting their tongues, keeping quiet and hiding away, they could finally say they were married. Em could finally say Dan was all hers.

She couldn't believe it was real. She was so sure those happy endings worthy of a Hallmark movie weren't for her. She was sure there was no such a thing as her better half. Emma was so convinced none of those things were made for her that she had to accept that she would spend most of her days alone in her tiny apartment surrounded by her books. It was almost impossible to believe how much things had changed. It was still difficult to comprehend how her tiny cold apartment in London was left behind and her new home was a spacious, cozy, lovely place that was perfect for her, her books and her husband.

Her husband.

It was almost impossible to believe that after everything that had happened, the beautiful man right beside her sleeping peacefully was her husband. He loved her so much that he married her not once, but twice. He was so crazy that he carried her in his skin forever, adding tattoos after tattoos in her honor. Some in their honor. Dan once said that if someone asked why he did such a silly thing like getting tattooed with his girlfriend, the answer would be simple. 'It's to honor the biggest and greatest love of my life. If someone has any doubts I'm all yours, then there they have it.'

Dan loved her so deeply that he was giving her everything she never thought she could have. A home, family, friends, love, safety. He made sure they had the wedding of their dreams, but especially Em's dreams. Lemon cake, wildflowers, fairy lights, friendship bracelets, and a playlist Dan created specifically for that day. The people they loved the most were there loving on them as Dan stood there in absolutely breathtaking his suit promised to love her for the rest of their days. He made her feel like the most special girl in the world tearing up as he looked at her wearing the dress that was a gift from Grace and Joe to not make her feel bad about the fact her parents weren’t there to do that little part of the tradition.

He was doing everything in his power to put the world at her feet, convinced Em didn't deserve less than that. He adored his wife so incredibly much he was trying to give her the one thing they wanted more than anything in the world. They were trying to have what the cruel world took from them. Her Danny loved her so much he was ready to put everything to a side if that meant they could have their own little family. In the silence of the night, Dan would hold her and whisper they would make it happen. He promised that sooner or later they would be holding their brunette baby that was half him and half Em.

Em couldn't wait to see that happen, but in the meantime she couldn't complain. From her spot in bed she could see her wedding dress neatly arranged on the back of a chair with Dan's suit jacket. She knew the rest of his clothes were somewhere around the room, spread around the floor. He didn't care about his clothes, but he took care not to ruin Emma's white dress. Not only was it her reception dress, but it was Blake's gift for her, so Dan was extra cautious about it. She would clean up the mess later, too distracted and happy to care.

When she looked at their clothes, she was drawn to the photo Dan had on his nightstand. It was 2019, Em's hair was way longer, Dan's curls were longer and wilder, and somehow they looked a lifetime younger. She was smiling at the camera as he kissed her cheek, his arms comfortably around her waist, exactly like he had them that morning. They had apartments and houses in different places around the world, and she loved them all, but at the end of the day, Dan's arms were her home. No matter where they were in the world, she was home as long as they were together. It was alright as long as her love held her hand. She knew it would be alright if his big brown eyes looked down at her.

The strange morning Em woke up before Dan, she would normally let him sleep. If she knew Dan didn't set his alarm to go for a run or to the gym, she simply let him rest. They promised the year off would be about them. They would rest, heal, recharge and enjoy. Letting Dan sleep was part of the process, but that morning she couldn't help it. They could cure the hangover with water, coffee and kisses. They could fight it with greasy food, but Em wanted her husband first. She wanted to see him smiling at her on their official first morning as a public newlywed couple. Em felt slightly guilty about ruining her husband's peaceful morning, but she knew he wouldn't be mad at her for waking him up with kisses. Her Danny was never able to be mad at her, especially not for such a thing. Soft kisses on his jaw and lips traveling down his neck were the perfect way to wake up. Her soft fingers running down his chest, outlining his abs and finally resting on his small waist were enough to bring a moan from his mouth.

"Morning, husband." Emmy whispered softly against his ear, returning to her job and marking his tanned skin. That was her husband, she was allowed to mark him, and if somebody didn't like that, it was their problem.

"Morning, baby girl. Sorry, I mean, morning, wife." A couple of words were more than enough to bring a moan from her. He never needed more than that.

Crazy curls. Soft kisses. Bedroom eyes. Loving moans. Raspy stubble. Chill air. Soft sheets. Familiar snores. Lavender curtains. Pokémon plushies. Polaroids stick around the mirror. Fairy lights. Warm golden sunlight. Farm noises. Scented candles. Messy clothes. Old books. Her husband's warm body against hers. Em couldn't believe that was her home. She couldn't believe that was her life.