#forgive me my Trazodone just kicked in
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it is hard to not feel bitter constantly because a bad thing happened how do people manage
#forgive me my Trazodone just kicked in#how to not be petty and upset all the time ?#well anyway today i went outside and thought about how beautiful the world Is because#i get to go to college and it felt nice outside and i got to drink something warm and yummy so that's cool#and then i went to class feeling like i was going to pass away because a female alter dressed me so i looked very feminine#and i was dissociating so i couldnt involve myself well but people were still nice to me and the teacher called me a he without hesitation#and i felt like i was treated like a human being today and i thought about how its kind of sad that my expectation is that i wont be treate#like a person. and it kind of sucks that i have to rebuild my brain to recognize the kindness in the world#but i can at least acknowledge the small tidbits in the moment and that's important so#idk what i'm talking about. time to slep#oh and occasionally i fall in love with my girlfriend all over again and this was one of those days. it just happened for no real reason#ok bye
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