#forced draft fan
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This just hit me
"With selfless hearts--" !?!?!?!?
Mike is literally being framed as the heart here, and while that is up to debate for a lot of people, it doesn't change the fact that within the story he is narratively given this role by Will and it is even reinforced at this very moment before his monologue to El.
While I do fully believe this line is meant to hold dual meaning spanning multiple characters in the finale, who are capable of being the heart, having hearts, and having been through similar anguish that revolved around them being selfless i.e. Max, Eddie, etc., it already exists as a verbalized concept for Mike. It's who he is (in Will's eyes), and in this moment, they are choosing to highlight that.
And so does that mean this is a 'selfless heart' moment for Mike? Is Mike here caring more about others wants and needs than his own? Why would telling his girlfriend he loves her be selfless? Unless it's what he thinks she wants and needs, but not what he wants and needs?...
#byler#ugh i have like 3 other drafts pertaining to this whole debacle#surrounding the monologue#and the painting#and it's just so insane bc the answer is right there#they've told us in little ways so many times#and so it's gonna be weird seeing not only regular fans shocked#but also bylers who have missed or ignored these things for whatever reason#the dm mike discourse has been on my mind lately#and that's just literally what this is#him caring about others needs and wants more than his own#going with what is presented to him and making assumptions#without actually digging because he is scared of what he will find#he is scared of trying before he denies#and in that he seals his own fate#and arguably everyones#which is so fucked up because he is essentially forcing himself to do something that he thinks is the right thing#and then it just backfires#bc the heart was not being honest#and everyone fell apart#'even el especially el...'#like they're telling us right there that it doesn't work on el's end bc mike wasn't honest
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Drew PAT and he's basically flippable :O
#PAT#Tsukasa Futaba#Patrick Sprigs#my art#fan art#mega man star force#ooc#I saved these as drafts on thiiis blog so they get to go here instead of my sideblog first xD#I did this some time ago for a project I'll finally get around to posting here#I mindlessly hid the fanny pack xD it makes no dif when facing this way#ngl I wanna a yellow fanny pack because of pat
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reboot: the PPGs – a trio of sisterly sisters who do sister things who deal with hilaaaaaarious situations resulting in epic lulz and who go through the same everyday problems that normal girls like you do!!! *btw they're superheroes and only fight seriously once per season but NOT TOO HARD!!!! they're fragile girls!!!!!!
me: [groans, keels over in pain]
fandom: the PPGs – older, sleeker, sexier, and serious as HELL. in a world, where darkness reigns, the looming futuristic sci-fi apocalypse and rise of robotically augmented enemies bring forth chaos and the girls' deep thirst for vengeance (deeper than their thirst for the rowdyruff boys). clearly, constant gore-filled carnage and senseless murder is their ONLY option *they might laugh once in their lives, at someone's pain
me: [coughs up blood]
#I'm kidding about being so dramatic but#I just wish there was balance to the force#I get being thirsty for violence but I mean#oh wow this was in my drafts from long ago#like 2016#both of these takes hurt my soul#and body apparently#thought i would post it because it made me laugh#i think there's a certain large subsection of fans who just wants like some ultra serious dramatic show like above#or think that the girls are psycho killers who just beat up anyone no matter what#to that i say... bleeecccchhhhhhhh [throws up forever]#powerpuff girls#ppg
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The look in question just in case you missed it
The story they’re telling is when they went to see One for the Road last Valentine’s Day 2.14.22 and Force was late.
8.4.23
eng trans ©️
#TaoKaeNoiXForceBook#forcebook#force jiratchapong#book kasidet#kasibook#fforce#clearing out some drafts#there’s a fb fan video out there chronicling force’s attempt to save book a seat next to him at nearly every meal time during safehouse s2#and its goes yes they’re all there to do fan service but why go out of your way to do fan service in such a subtle way#anyway i think about that often lol
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man. MAN. M A N . your latest comic had me in my FEELINGS. i swear djfbdmvnv
partway thru when ww just kept not showing up and Not Showing Up my chest legit got all tight and i was terrified u finally made a post where ww actually DIES djdnfmf
anyway it was AMAZING and i LOVED IT and the fake angst i imagined was rly intense lmao thank u for another godly post. the buildup was so visceral that i felt vash's loneliness in the pit of my gut dncncmfnvn
THANK YOU SO MUCH FOR ENJOYING AND FOR TELLING ME THIS!!!! i'm so glad my intended effect worked and that his loneliness was palpable enough that it could be felt!!!!
the second part of this ask made me laugh though, the "finally made a post where ww..." SFMDKGMSDK this is a safe zone, guys, don't worry except for that gmorning vashwood, but that was only once and it wasn't that bad!
THANK YOU SO MUCH AGAIN, youre so sweet!! i hope to create more comics like that in the future!
#asks#trimax spoilers#just in case?#but thank you so much again!!!!!#i have a few v10 comics in the drafts... but i mentioned on twit u guys are saved from it bc i keep on crying while drawing#that chapter is full of agony. i know every trimax / 98 vw fan has it playing on loop in their head. everyday itll be on my tl#im also forced to hold back a bit due to school.... one of the comics is one of the first vw i drew and i reallly want to color#all the pages properly bc i think its an essential Piece to my vw universe-- as dramatic as that sounds.#but anyway anyway dfksmfkds fluff and bittersweet for now!!!! and forced to imagine the pain vash goes through when he no longer has ww
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Fanaedar can’t steal glances at Flora very often because he’s got some strange magic stuff that’s triggered by eye contact and he doesn’t want to risk it, but one of the moments he can is when she’s in the zone working on a project
#but like#he definitely doesnt have a crush and he doesn't know what you're talking about#dnd#dungeons and dragons#art#just a little sketch todayyy#as of drafting this post: no neither one has admitted to themselves or anyone else that they have feelings for each other#she's just oblivious#his is through stubborn force of will because he has 2 other consciousnesses that unfortunately can hear his thoughts like an open book#and vice versa#and both of them do know that he has a crush#and one of them is an active pest about it#but fan still will not admit to having a feeling#feelings? what are those#stop smiling at her then dummy#stop looking for an excuse to touch her#stop prioritizing the enemies that are attacking her#im good im fine im not feeling things about them#ok goodbye
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There's a man vomiting loudly outside (potentially in our parking lot, but I'm deeply in an overstimulated autism thing rn and i simply cannot be arsed to get up and check)
I would normally, but there's already a man out there interrogating him and like. I'm sure he's well-intentioned, but I lost my shit at his opener of 'Hey buddy, you having a good day?'
He's being violently sick in public; i think you can assume he's not enjoying this day.
#text post#im hitting the shower in a few minutes then after letting myself have an edible (held off all day for various reasons)#then i wanna get as close to wizard high as possible and disappear into Minecraft with Housemate for the night lmao#don't get me wrong today was actually very productive for me#resumes sent out decent amt of prolific done a new fic started and some drafts worked on#plus dishes done#but like. idk. my brain is very fast and angry and tired and i don't wanna be in this headspace#and i think i just overwhelmed myself with stuff a tiny bit today bc like. i know when im at the edge of it sometimes#but it's too easy to force myself past it in the name of productivity then deal with the fallout after#as i type this i realise i also need to clean the downstairs bathroom fan and forgor#but!! i forgot to mention i was able to get a belated bday gift out to my mum! got it ordered to b shipped to her at least lol#v glad I got that done#tw emetophobia#anyway i feel terrible for this guy and hope by the time i leave the shower he's doing better
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modern actor/celebrity AU for any two kids u wanna talk about :>
oh boy, this is a fun and silly one let’s go. okay so the obvious first candidate would be maeve
we been knew she could pull off being a big star. one of those wombo combo writers and actors who ends up starring in one or two or a few of the adaptions of her own works on top of the other things she stars in. i could see in some worlds her also(/or) releasing music tbh
speaking of—Of Course as an actress she primarily works on period or fantasy pieces because she loves the drama and romance of them. other than that i could see her being a hit in rom-coms, romances, musicals, and thrillers. i would personally kill for a maeve role in a period paranormal film, i simply think it would be dope
an absolute hoe for con panels, online interviews and podcasts guest spots because it's the perfect excuse for her to get all passionate and eager to share about her works with the folk who are the most interested. don't let her do any of those puppy interviews because she'll want to adopt all of them by the end of it
legally obligated to make a joke about her having her own taika/tessa/rita moment in the media of the cameras catching her with more than one partner. which leads into her being ardent about openly talking on her polyamory & bisexuality whenever she can to spread more proud and positive representation.
caused a meltdown in her fan community one time because she dyed her hair a deep purple out of the blue and debuted it thru a fuckn insta story or something unassuming lmao
second kiddo would have to be riya lmao
one of those celebs who was in the spotlight from birth because both of her parents are famous. grew up a media darling and ate up all the attention, probably became an influencer in her late teens because of being so active on social media.
unfortunately i know in my heart that she would be the worst little diva imaginable when she first starts working because she's been spoiled her entire life. real big "i'll be in my trailer k bye" "i want this very specific flavor of ice cream that's only sold out of country ready for me or i'll throw a fit" "yeah i'll wait for my driver who cares if i'm 20 minutes late" kind of energy. people put up with it because she's pretty, is surprisingly good at acting, and her daddy's the one who got her those first roles and everyone loves him so they don't wanna make him upset by bringing up the fact his daughter's kind of a brat ://
has a new partner on her arm like every damn month. probably becomes a whole Thing for fandom and certain media outlets to predict which co-star she's going to start hooking up with whenever the cast is announced for her next project tbh
the majority of her roles are rich characters because she plays the part well and positively adores being put in expensive wardrobes. can't be convinced otherwise that her most well known role wouldn't be some type of princess in a fantasy or historical, she'd eat that shit up. the material, the wardrobe, the constant instances of people addressing her ass princess in interviews which needs to be stopped her ego is big enough as is please god
she's probably been involved in multiple instances of people recording her in embarrassing/shameful/private moments and selling the clips off to online tabloids. being shamed by her mother for behavior at a party in some back room, a loud break-up outside of her hotel at 1am, talking mad shit about one of her co-stars while drunk outside of a club as she waits for her driver, etc etc. hopefully she grows up and stops behaving like that lmao
send me an au and i’ll tell you 5 headcanons for it!
#WHOOPS forgot this in the drafts#thank youuuu alana#ch: maeve sommers#ch: valeriya de clairmont#i just Know riya would be so divisive as a star#because she'd have so many fans but also soooo many haters. so many people calling her a brat after each news story#these two are opposites bc maeve's an absolute angel who does so much good and riya's just a spoiled party girl#one arranges charity events and the other pouts for 20 minutes bc her mom forced her to attend one on a weekend smh#translating riya's turning point from da to any sort of real world story would be so sad so i'm avoiding it lmfao
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panthers:
#anyways congrats to the rats!!#hockey DOES belong in the south#oilers you fought all the way through to force this game 7 which is INCREDIBLE#feeling a little emo as my first official season as a fan is over#i already went through the stages of grief when the bruins got knocked out#but i’m very thankful for this sport and this community#it’s gotten me through some very hard times recently#CANT WAIT TO DO IT ALL AGAIN NEXT SEASON!#but first … draft and off season chaos#let’s go ❤️#playoffs24#oilers#panthers
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thinkinggggg abouttttt naruuuuto and sasuuuuke
#hrm. *opens ao3*#what is your wisdom sns fans. i need comfort food and those two are It#naruto#rose.txt#ignore me my mental is so weird rn and also im locked out of posting on my ig story so im GOING BONKERS not getting to talk on there#like i am a serial story poster. and um. rn im JAILED and idk why but i miss interacting w my friends and just vibin#anyways. anyways. i have homework due tomorrow and i feel like i may perish#I KNOW ALL OF THIS IS BECAUSE I BARELY SLEPT LAST NIGHT AND ILL BE BETTER TOMORROW BUT RN THINGS FEEL BAD#last night i had a really good idea for one of the fics im drafting and i forced myself to open my eyes and unlock my phone to write it down#because im always like “i could never forget this idea” when i think of something in the middle of the night. and then i forget#i was fighting for my life though i was so eepy it was all i could do to type two sentences of my thoughts lol#anyways. byeeeee
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you know the killer doesn't understand
in which spencer is so terrified he's going to hurt you after he gets out of prison that he can barely touch you. an argument ensues.
angst (+ comfort) warnings/tags: established relationship, fem!reader, mentions of violent intrusive thoughts (non-specific), arguing, yelling, use of the word rape, nightmares, happyish ending, mention of showering together, it's a bad time but it's also a good time for us woo i love angsty angst a/n: i miss posting for real so bad i dug up this draft which was mostly finished and polished it up. i think i really like this one and it was based on a request but i lost it:( i hope u guys enjoy this, pls lmk<3
Spencer is by no means happy with his sudden fear of touching you—it makes everything in his life significantly harder and less convenient and he hates that he’s constantly afraid he’s going to break you. He hates watching you hold back from attacking him with a hug when he enters a room like you used to, and he feels terrible every time you ball up on the opposite side of the couch as he reads, waiting for an invitation into his lap but too scared to ask for one (he’ll always hold out his arm for you, though—he’s not cruel.)
You’re adorable in the way you stand at the foot of the bed in your pajamas, arms behind your back like it’s not your bed too, but it makes him feel terrible. This isn’t at all what he wanted for you, and in all honestly he’s thought about ending the relationship because he knows he’s being an absolutely awful partner—but he just can’t bring himself to. Instead, he gestures for you to get into bed, and you curl up under the covers close to him but not against him, and he’ll play with your hair and read for a while because he can’t sleep very well. Eventually he’ll assume the position of sleep, but some sick part of him doesn’t know what to do with the sounds of the city and the fan instead of the sounds of a hundred men rolling and sniffing and shuffling around their echoey cells. He doesn’t understand warmth anymore, or softness, or nice pajamas or fluffy pillows. He’s starting to think he doesn’t understand you. And that’s the worst thought of all.
So he essentially dozes for the first week, on and off, always exhausted in the mornings but what’s new. When he can’t sleep, he turns his head to watch you breathe—some beautiful, sweet creature dreaming in his bed, unwaveringly loyal to him even though he can hardly stand to touch you for fuck’s sake. You’re beautiful, and it makes him feel better to watch you, even if he can’t touch you. Not now that he knows what he is capable of doing to another person. What if he has some sort of PTSD—PTSS, thank you, Luke Alvez—induced dream and does something terrible to you in his sleep? It’s not like you’re tiny, but he’s stronger, he knows he is, and lately every time you get too close he remembers exactly what it feels like to exert the full force of that strength, and what it feels like when someone else unleashes their own onto him.
They’re just intrusive thoughts, and in them he doesn’t hurt you intentionally, but he always feels a little bit sick now. He is so, so sick. A bull in a China shop. Spencer knows exactly how breakable humans are—it’s his job to know. If he left so much as one red mark on you by accident, he’s quite sure he’d drill down to a previously unknown rock bottom. And if he reaches that point, he doesn’t know if he’d ever deserve to come back.
Every day it seems to become clearer that the only humane thing to do is break up with you. But for now he’ll watch you sleep—the delicate rising and falling of your chest, the way you curl in on yourself because you can’t curl into him. In sleep you look so peaceful and content. You never look that way awake, anymore. Not when he’s around, which is pretty much always. At least he can’t disappoint you while you’re asleep.
Or so he’d like to think.
Until one night, about a week and a half after he gets home; you whimper in your sleep. It’s so quiet he could’ve missed it, but he doesn’t, and then he watches your smooth brow furrow with worry and he knows you’re having a nightmare immediately.
Spencer panics—before, he would have woken you up and held you and comforted you until you fell back asleep and it would have been so simple. Now he’s frozen, afraid to touch you but not sure if he can just lie there watching you so afraid and not do a thing about it.
In the end, you choose for him—and it only takes a few moments. You’re close enough to him that it’s easy for you to close the few inches even in sleep, and maybe you’re slightly conscious but not enough to remember you’re not supposed to touch him.
He stops breathing as you fold yourself against him, muttering worried nonsense—he catches his name, once—nestling against his chest, one searching arm gently draping over his waist. Every muscle in his body is rigid, and his thoughts—his mind goes… completely fucking blank.
Suddenly, all he’s known, all he’s ever known, is the smell of your hair, the warmth of you seeping through layers of clothing, and the weight of your arm over him. Everything he ever was ceases to exist, and he’s just this, right now. The person you’d turned to unconsciously for comfort, so sure, so trusting that he would keep you safe. He can feel your breath for the first time in months. Slowly every tense muscle unspools. For the first time in a long time he doesn’t feel dangerous. He doesn’t feel like his entire body is spring loaded and ready to attack at the slightest provocation. Spencer allows himself to hold you, and part of it feels like betrayal because he knows how badly you need this from him while you’re awake but mostly he feels like he could cry. His thumb rubs circles into the middle of your back and your head tucks so perfectly under his chin while he studies the rumpled sheets where you’d been lying a moment ago. He almost feels like sticking his tongue out to gloat at your half of the mattress—haha, look who gets to hold her now—but instead he sighs, shakily, and squeezes his eyes shut.
You don’t make another sound for hours.
He’s reluctant to let you go when you begin to stir around six AM, but forcibly holding onto you is so far from what he wants to do that he manages. You roll back over to your own side of the bed, and he continues admiring you from afar until he falls asleep. It’s the best three hours of sleep he’s had in a very long time.
Of course, you don’t remember it. When you wake up your sadness resumes, and so does the pretending like you’re not sad, but you’re a very good sport—and it helps that he’s feeling much better this morning than he has since he got back.
“Good morning,” you whisper faintly, still blinking as you watch him longingly from your spot.
Spencer pushes himself up onto an elbow, and you watch with big eyes as he leans over you, stroking your cheek with his free hand.
“Good morning. You sleep okay?”
Your brow flickers, and he realizes it’s not a question he asks every morning, and you’re probably distracted by this overt display of affection, but you answer it obediently anyway.
“I think so. I had weird dreams.”
He hums.
“About what?”
It’s quiet for a moment as he takes in the exact spattering of microscopically fractured pigment over your irises. Your voice is small when you finally speak.
“Do I have to tell you?”
That hurts.
“No. But it might help.”
Coming from him? Ironic doesn’t even begin to cover it.
You acknowledge him with a small hum of your own, studying him with soft, mistrustful eyes.
He can’t help it anymore—Spencer leans down and gently kisses you, so tenderly, so chastely, it makes his own head spin. He hasn’t kissed you like that since you picked him up from Milburn. It’s long overdue.
Which is why he’s not expecting you to start crying. He pulls back immediately, not far, just enough to assess your expression.
“What’s this? What’s wrong, angel?” He frowns. Your lip quivers in a way that feels like a blow to the chest.
“That’s not… you’re…”
“What? What is it?”
A fat tear finally traces a path down your cheek and when you speak your voice breaks in the most fragile, devastating way.
“You’re not being fair.”
He has no neat question to summarize all the bafflement your accusation inspires in his lately cloudy head, but the wildly confused look on his face must be prompt enough.
“I’m trying really hard to respect your space and boundaries and not upset you but my feelings are hurt, Spencer, I don’t know how they couldn’t be. I feel like you don’t even like me anymore. I’m embarrassed around you because I feel like I care about you so much more than you care about me. And then you—and then you wake up one morning and you think it’s okay to act like you love me again but I can’t—I c—” you stop, obviously frustrated—now crying in earnest and lacking the words. “You can’t be mean to me. I know you’ve been through a lot and I’m sorry but you can’t treat me like that. I’m a person, too.”
His chest aches and he swallows down barbed wire.
“I’m not acting like I love you. I do love you. More than I’ve ever loved anyone or anything in my life. That’s not an act.”
It’s not an adequate response, but your words are still spinning in his head until he can’t keep up with them. He’s not used to this, anymore. The language you two had developed is so foreign now.
Maybe he just doesn’t know how to talk to you.
Resignation—a too-calm recognition softens the stormy look that has brewed on your face. As soon as it’s gone, and you’re looking at him placidly, he realizes he’s afraid.
“Well, that’s not enough,” you whisper.
Spencer feels like he’s been shot as you push the covers aside and slip out of bed. And he knows what that feels like.
“Where are you going?” And then louder, when you don’t hear him because you’ve already left the room, “Where are you going?”
He follows you through the apartment as you march purposefully for the door, slipping shoes on and grabbing your keys and coat.
You barely look over your shoulder as you leave, slamming the front door behind you. Things shake from the impact. A mini earthquake.
Spencer is too stunned to follow you.
It’s not until a few minutes later when he goes to call you that he realizes your phone is still sitting on your bedside table. He stares at it, tasting metal, because he has absolutely no way to reach you or guarantee your safety. There’s no way for you to call him, or anyone, if you get in trouble—and he fears that you’ll retaliate against him by doing something stupid and dangerous.
He only just manages to stop himself from calling the police and asking them to start looking for you. Only just recognizes it to be an overreaction.
Besides, he’s not feeling particularly fond of the criminal justice institution these days. If it came down to it, he’d trust himself and his team over the cops any day.
The team. They’re always a resource. If worst comes to worst, he thinks, robotically making coffee as he tries to talk himself down, and she doesn’t come home before dark, I’ll call all of her closest friends. If she doesn’t come home before the morning—the thought makes him feel sick—I’ll deploy every fucking resource at my disposal.
Maybe that’s an overreaction, too, but he has to find a way to self-soothe somehow. Planning makes him feel better. Being prepared for the things you never see coming makes him feel better. It’s impossible, of course—but the illusion of control is stubborn and so seductive.
Thankfully, it doesn’t come to that.
At around 2 PM, he receives a couple of texts from Garcia that are a massive relief.
Penelope: She’s at my apartment
Penelope: BE NICER TO YOUR GIRLFRIEND!!!!!!!
The series of emojis that follow (including an octopus?), he doesn’t even try to decipher. He simply drops his phone and sighs deeply into his hands, releasing an extreme amount of paranoid tension that had been tying him into knots. Lately, he’s had this sense that everything is fleeting—that the things he takes for granted are painfully, violently impermanent. It doesn’t take anyone with a degree to figure out why he’s been feeling that way, but it’s so all-consuming he’s not sure how to cope with it. Just a few days ago, he’d been wondering how to break up with you. Now he’s asking himself how the fuck he thought he’d be able to do that when he’s barely functioning after a few hours without you.
It’s a question he still hasn’t answered by the time the front door opens at 10 PM. It’s clear by the deer-in-headlights look on your face that you hadn’t been expecting him like this—leaning over the counter, half-empty mug by his hand, staring at nothing in particular and waiting for you to come home. Neither of you have changed clothing since this morning—not that you could—but you look apprehensive as you close it behind you, never facing away from him. The whole thing is like a teenager being caught sneaking back in by a weary parent.
For a moment the silent confrontation stretches into the horizon, a non-specific point as neither of you seem inclined to be the first to talk. You just watch him watching you—leaning against the door rigidly as if you can’t get far enough away. But he’s too tired for this. Too worn out.
“How’d you get home?”
You swallow.
“Penelope.”
Spencer nods slowly, rolling his bottom lip between teeth and finally looking away.
“You really should have brought your phone.”
You scoff, peeling yourself from the door.
“Of course that’s what you’re worried about.”
It’s the same situation as this morning, but in reverse—him following after you down the hall as you storm toward the bedroom.
“Wh—should I not have been? You scared me—” he says your name, barely catching the door before it can slam in his face. “I was worried about you.”
“Why?” you face him, laughing bewilderedly as if the situation were at all funny. A kind of manic energy crackles from the surface of your skin and in your eyes that renders him unable to think of a reply. “Because you thought I would get raped and murdered and then you’d be sad?”
“Yes!” Spencer yells, eyes widening as he fails to contain his frustration any longer. “That is fucking exactly why I was scared!”
You step forward, getting in his space. It jars him, momentarily—he wants to get away from you. Being angry and so close to you is terrifying. What if he lashes out? What if he hurts you? He’s seen crimes of passion. His blood is freezing in his veins.
“Of course you didn’t give one single fuck that I left you. You didn’t think for one fucking second that I might be tired of this. That wasn’t what you were scared of at all.” For every inch you near, he backs away. Another scorned, bitter laugh from you that feels like poison coursing through his entire circulatory system. You notice everything, eyeing him up and down as he cowers from you. “What is this, Spencer? If you hate being near me that much, just fucking break up with me.”
You’re close enough that he can see the tears welling in your eyes, but he’d know they were there even if he couldn’t observe them. He would hear it in your voice. He would feel it. But he can’t do anything about it. Right now, he’s paralyzed.
“If the only thing holding you back is wanting to spare my feelings, just fucking do it. This isn’t better. I don’t give a fuck if it’s hard for you. It’s hard for me, too, but I’m not just going to ignore it anymore.”
There’s no more room. The wall is at is back.
“Honey, please back up,” Spencer breathes. Last time his back was to a wall, he’d been gagged and beaten. Don’t lash out. She never hurt you. It wasn’t her.
“Don’t tell me what to do!” you shout, as tears begin to spill over your cheeks. “Either break up with me or stop telling me to go away!”
At that moment, as you break down and your words become muddled with sobs, you raise your fist.
Spencer watches it approach his shoulder as if in slow-motion.
On instinct, he catches your wrist.
There’s a lull as he waits for something to explode, for something to go terribly, deeply wrong—
But it doesn’t.
He realizes his grip is gentle. He realizes you’d never actually hurt him like that. He realizes how little resistance he’d found when he stopped what was sure to be nothing more than a petulant, petty bump against his shoulder—a maneuver that wouldn’t have hurt in the slightest. It was nothing more than a desolate, childlike display of feelings bigger than you know what to do with.
In the second that it takes him to realize all of this, to realize he is not endangering you in the slightest, nor you him, you’ve begun to truly sob. Standing just inches from him, head angled down as he holds your wrist carefully, you are the picture of a girl who has been running on empty for a very long time and has nothing left to give. Spencer twines his arms around you, tucking your head under his chin and slowly rubbing your back like he’d never forgotten how to hold you. It stuns you, and the tears pause for just a second—before you’re wrapping desperate, weakened arms around him and sobbing even harder, albeit silently, into his shirt.
“I don’t want to break up,” he whispers, his own voice shaky with understated emotion. “I’m sorry. Please don’t say that. I don’t want that.”
“What’s wrong with you?” You cry, a desperate plead caught between sobs that wrack your body against his against the wall. And he knows it’s not an accusation. It’s not an insult. It’s a question borne of confusion and fear. It’s what a child might ask a sick dog while tears stream down feverish cheeks. And it’s completely appropriate, considering he never tells you anything anymore and he’s only just realizing how scary that must be. Spencer is back from prison but you may as well still be living alone for all that you know about him. He tangles a hand in your hair and holds you against his chest, breathing you like nitrous oxide.
“I don’t know,” he whispers. The room beyond blurs as he stares at nothing, focused only on the tingly euphoria of feeling you under his hands clashing with the ever-present and crushing shame that he couldn't do it sooner. “I don’t know. I’m sorry.”
“I don’t want you—to be sorry.” Shuddering breaths and gasps still cleave your sentences in half, and Spencer listens so intently he thinks there might be harmonics hidden in the layers of your voice. He clings to every syllable like you’re wielding the word of god in a five-foot-something body. “I just miss you so m—much. I want you to—to love me.”
“I do,” he promises immediately, lips pressing to your ear. “I do love you. So much. So much.”
When you don’t respond, he’s not exactly surprised. He almost asks what he can do, what you need—but is quite sure that’s not the right move. Instead he doesn’t say a thing. Only holds you.
Later, you’ll pull back and he’ll swim in your teary gaze, and then kiss you. He’ll trace silent apologies into every inch of your skin under the torrent of the shower, and he’ll do whatever it takes to make you understand. But for now, for the first time in months, you’re holding each other, and that’s all either of you need.
#spencer reid#spencer reid fic#spencer reid x fem!reader#spencer reid x reader#spencer reid fanfic#spencer reid angst#spencer reid imagine#spencer reid x self insert#spencer reid x you#spencer reid fluff#spencer reid fanfiction#criminal minds fanfiction#criminal minds fanfic#criminal minds#criminal minds fic
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❥ 𝐓𝐎𝐎 𝐇𝐎𝐓 𝐓𝐎 𝐂𝐔𝐃𝐃𝐋𝐄 ↳ 𝐰/ 𝐀𝐭𝐬𝐮𝐦𝐮, 𝐎𝐬𝐚𝐦𝐮, 𝐊𝐮𝐫𝐨𝐨, 𝐊𝐞𝐧𝐦𝐚, 𝐎𝐢𝐤𝐚𝐰𝐚, 𝐈𝐰𝐚𝐢𝐳𝐮𝐦𝐢 & 𝐒𝐚𝐤𝐮𝐬𝐚
a/n: reader is gn! i started drafting those during one of the first sticky hot summer nights of the year, then forgot about it until this came over me once again like a fever, and now here we are. i love writing drabbles because they force you to really think about the chars, how you perceive them and how to nail their unique personalities in 200 words or less. anyway, this is my first time writing for HQ after the brainworms got me down bad and i had lots of fun! hope you'll enjoy them too ♡
word count: 1.3k
𝐀𝐓𝐒𝐔𝐌𝐔 whines when you have the audacity to kick him back towards his end of the couch, catching your ankle and pulling you towards him in return, stubbornly ignoring your protests. Too hot to cuddle, my ass, he pouts, genuinely offended that you’d even consider that; when the only time Atsumu ever feels a sense of calm is when part of you touches him. Your hand playing with the shaved hair in the back of his neck, your leg hooked over his hipbone as you sprawl out in bed together, hell, even your icy cold feet shoved underneath his butt during winter. Something was missing when he couldn’t have your proximity. Yer so needy, Tsumu. So what if he was? He pulls you into his lap, face nuzzled into the crook of your neck, hands tightening around your waist. His breath fanning over your skin, hot and cool against it. Atsumu takes, he demands, but with you he is pleading, silent for once. Just a little longer–dreaming, breathing you in, kissing till he feels you smiling against his lips.
𝐎𝐒𝐀𝐌𝐔 wears his hair shorter now, back at its natural dark color, too. You helped him buzz it off during one of those sticky summer nights. Both of you in nothing but your underwear, Osamu sitting on the edge of the bathtub in your cramped bathroom. One hand of yours holding a razor and the other clamped over your mouth because you horribly messed up a setting and now he had a funny little edge in his hair, throwing you both in a laughing fit. It was your first summer together and Osamu couldn’t help but hope that there would be many more like this to come, with your bodies orbiting each other, unable to keep your hands off despite the heat and the sweat, the air heavy and electric and yet so light whenever he hears you laugh. Nothing beats the feeling of lifting you up on the kitchen counter and your eyes lingering on his hands, shaping a midnight snack for the both of you, getting drunk on stolen glances and kisses. There’s many metaphors for food and love and right now, Osamu can taste them all on the tip of your tongue.
𝐊𝐔𝐑𝐎𝐎 hasn’t even kicked his shoes off at the entrance yet and is already loosening his tie, before slender fingers work down button for button on his shirt. He hears you laugh about his demeanor from the other end of the hallway. How lucky, he thinks to himself. To have someone waiting for him at home, making even long work days during the most miserable summer heat bearable. His shirt has barely hit the floor and he’s already on you, caging you in with his arms and covering every inch of your skin he can reach in kisses, despite your giggling and feigned huffing over how sticky he is, sending him to shower first (as if you wouldn’t come right after him). Kuroo purrs when your hands tangle in his hair. In the end you always pull him back towards your lips again, swallowing every little quip and taunt like candy, sweet and syrupy in your mouth. It reminds him how he fell in love with you many summers ago, his heart ablaze ever since.
𝐊𝐄𝐍𝐌𝐀 is glued to the fan at this point. He even switched gaming from his desktop set-up to a handheld console, reluctantly admitting that his old house would heat up even more with his computer running at full blast. His expression really says it all when you approach him, silently pleading for cuddles. Kenma just can’t understand how anyone would seek someone else’s body heat when the sun outside was already doing a pretty good job in trying to end him. Still, he isn’t immune to your charms, never was (one time he mumbled something about your stats being way too high and how everything changed once he received a love buff of yours). When you hold out a popsicle as a means of bribery and blink at him with those damn soft eyes of yours, Kenma pauses his game and holds out his arms. He hums into the kiss you give him before sitting down in his lap, your lips tasting like ice cream and summer love. He rests his chin on your shoulder, face nuzzled against your neck, before he continues his game, letting you feed him the sweet cold treat. Summer might have become a little more bearable with you in his life–though he was already looking forward to many winters under the kotatsu with you.
𝐎𝐈𝐊𝐀𝐖𝐀 is squishing your cheeks together, his thumb brushing over the corner of your mouth. Collecting evidence, but also wanting to feel your tongue poke out slightly against it, cheeky as ever. Just how could you eat the last ice cream in the freezer without him? He lets out an exaggerated huff, feigned indignation, both of you knowing he can never keep this up for too long–not when it comes to you. Oikawa leans down to kiss you, your face still in a tight grip, tasting the remains of the ice cream on your lips, as if you weren’t sweet enough already. Maybe he can be bribed for another kiss when you offer a midnight walk to the 7/11 down the street, promising to pay for a cool sweet treat to make it up to him. He had already forgotten what he was mad about the moment you leaned into the kiss, but he’ll never say no to a chance to hold your hand, even if it’s sticky with leftover ice cream and the summer heat. To Oikawa, love is stored in the mundane things, even if his love for you is anything but that.
𝐈𝐖𝐀𝐈𝐙𝐔𝐌𝐈 is standing in the kitchen past midnight, wearing nothing but a pair of boxers while he roams the freezer for anything to help him cool down; even a pack of frozen peas would do. He feels a pang of guilt for having peeled away from you, your form pressed so tightly against him in his sleep, it almost gave him a heat stroke–for more reason than one. Everything is sticky and airless and Iwaizumi is sure that if he would have glanced at you even a minute longer, his heart might have just given out on him. All this love he holds for you, burning him up from the inside, like a fever. He lets out a long exhale when he presses an ice bag against the back of his neck, but it’s not that what causes a shiver down his spine; it’s two arms sneaking around his waist from behind, your sleepy voice mumbling out his name, your body melting into his again. The first kiss pressed on the side of your neck is an apology, the second one a promise. The third–to devour you.
𝐒𝐀𝐊𝐔𝐒𝐀 grumbles something about you being too sticky and sweaty, making a weak attempt to shove you back to your side of the bed, only to pull you back by your hips when you actually do leave some room between you. He can’t help it, you fit so perfectly in the curve of his body, your back pressed against his chest, one of his knees nudged between your legs, all tangled up. It’s the perfect position to plant kisses on the back of your neck, too. Kiyoomi loathes those hot summer nights in the concrete city. He’d rather be somewhere else with you, somewhere to breathe more easily through this heat. Maybe you should move to the countryside, yes. A small house with lots of green surrounding it. Less people and noise, just you and him. Yeah, he would like that. He kisses the back of your neck once more and takes a slow, deep inhale of your sweet scent, before sleep finally crawls upon him again. For now he’ll endure this heat, anything, as long as he can hold you in his arms like this–and have a cold shower with you in the morning, maybe.
#haikyu x reader#hq x reader#atsumu x reader#osamu x reader#oikawa x reader#kuroo x reader#kenma x reader#iwaizumi x reader#sakusa x reader#haikyuu fluff#haikyuu imagines#hq fluff#hq imagines#hq x gender neutral reader#miya atsumu#miya osamu#kuroo tetsurou#kozume kenma#sakusa kiyoomi#oikawa tooru#iwaizumi hajime
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OUGHHHRHGHHHHH MY LITTLE ASSHOLE FUCKS (and bessie little angel bessie)!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! AUGH THEY'RE SO PRETTY IN YOUR STYLE... watch out with cookin fish in a microwave he could explode like an egg
i am putting your little guys in my mental microwave @spotsupstuff
#others' art#rw#favs#oc tag#oc: fish inside a birdcage#oc: old man shawn#oc: the seafarer#oc: the tinkerer#aight. -cocks compliment gun-#STARS above your shading is WONDERFUL you did SHADED PIECES- oh just you wait. i finish this stinkin post thats been hanging in my drafts-#-for a month n ill be comin back for you and FAM again i cannot just let this slide- itd be immoral of me 😔 WHOLE SHADED PIECES GODS ABOVE#the shading on the first one- just- ough ough ough... i ADORE the boldness of the light the strength of it. the way fish looks so holy like#-that... finally ridden of the 'bullied by squidcadas that lame nerd bitch' status... impossible became possible for once#AND DO I SEE CORRECTLY DID YOU MAKE HIS HEAD FIN ANTENNA THING SEE THROUGH????? OH MY FUCKIN GODS!!!!!!!!! OH MY GODS THATS SO BEAUTIFUL#you made him look like an iterator-sona for a wheel/karma flower im going to cry i love that so much my brain is gon explode#that plays SO well into his themes and things imma stim so hard ill fly to the moon. i gotta see if i can pull that off as well now#FUCKIN SHAWN I DIDNT EXPECT SHAWN OF ALL SCAV OCS IVE MADE I DIDNT EXPECT THE BAKED GRANDPA livin his best life with local hatchiegirl...#u drew bessie so wonderfully too lookit that girl shes so Chonky. that lil blep is everything when i think about it actually...#SEAF seaf is so aggressively macho im gonna yell /pos what a man. this is the ideal male body yes. peak performance. he could-#-clock a leviathan. that shit would Evaporate. im such a fan of the fur/hair details on his body that pleases my eyeball so much#AND the last one- tinktink looks like a fuckin Entity.. fishs bomb-crafting sleep paralysis demon friend KLVDJSGLKSDM#you shaped her so cozily i just kinda wanna pick her up spin her around and then hug her ough 🙏 shes like a Plushie.....#AND FISHS FACE IN THE LAST PIC I KEEP LAUGHING ABOUT IT he looks so concerned. 'hm. hrmmn.... i think i sense a disturbance in the force.'#the disturbance in question is the 40% chance of unexplainable explosion just waiting to happen right in their faces#i do also really wanna praise how you drew fishs hands your style of hands and mine for the iterators seems so different but you still did-#-such a great job there more or less mimicking mine! its amazing!!!!!#im very honored that youve decided to draw them! you are an awesome artist n ngl i didnt expect this lsdkgjslkdkjg thank you 💜
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a king, his advisor, and the betrothed
@toxycodone the fic is here fren
11 K words / warnings - reader has vag n wears a dress once, threesome WOAH, p in v + p in a sex, oral (m receiving), kabru is a fan of inappropriate workplace relationships
summary - Laios cannot find a suitor on his own, so Kabru is forced to summon an old... friend... for help.
~~~
“Just… someone you would like, then.”
“Someone I would like?”
“Yeah! If you like them, they must be good, right?”
“This isn’t about… ugh, fine.”
Kabru already knew exactly who to set up with Laios, but he wanted to grant himself a few more hours of delusion by drafting a list of desired traits.
.
.
.
A queen should be: diligent and humble, wise and patient. Honest.
Ideally, a short-lived king should marry from another short-lived race. Any children will therefore be short-lived as well, which Kabru considers highly preferable. Another tallman is his best option to keep infertility sparse.
Laios’ personality will need to be accounted for as well (Kabru finds that the longer he dawdles, the more fun he has hypothesizing Laios’ perfect match).
Laios, specifically, needs someone blunt and unencumbered by conformity -- the man seems to thrive when others feel comfortable speaking frankly with him. Someone from another royal court will not do, and especially not someone descended from direct nobel blood. Furthermore, Laios is clueless as to what his own title ensues, so he does little more for his countrymen than make appearances or pass budgets and bills. So for Kabru’s own sanity, someone intelligent and inclined to make Laios do his actual job is also preferred.
They must balance indulgence and sobriety for the man’s antics, as well as willingness to sit through Laios’ obscure personality.
Wait…
“No,” Kabru scratches that last half of his sentence, ink bleeding across the page, “What kind of matchmaker settles?”
They must like Laios, and Laios must like them. Laios is not a man Kabru can envision enduring loveless marriage, it’d be too awkward and the dolt would have it annulled.
Someone not petrified by monsters and intrigued by Laios’ strange personality, but also not so deranged as to be exactly like Laios.
Again, a single name comes to Kabru’s mind, but this time he does not put it off. He’s had his fun scheming, now he must draft a letter to the Northern Continent. To a village chief’s firstborn -- acquainted well enough with basic politics while also sharing a similar upbringing with Laios.
You’re perfect.
You’re also…
“An ex-party member?” Laios’ eyes skim over the contents of Kabru’s summoning letter, addressed at the top to you, “Cool.”
“Yeah, an ex-party member,” Kabru sighs to himself, imagining Rin beating him over the head with her staff right about now, “I think you should know, I briefly- ”
“Kabru,” Laios shakes his head, grinning, “I don’t care. If you trust them, I do.”
Briefly -- sure -- if an entire year and some months was brief. Kabru sighs louder and decides to let Laios find out on his own, since the king is so determined to look cool and easygoing.
In any case, you’ll be fond of Laios, Kabru’s certain.
Certain, and also dreading.
Year 512
“Where’d you find the space case anyway?”
“You sound upset.”
“Look!” Rin flings a gloved arm straight out, gesturing heatedly towards where the party’s newest member is staring straight at the first floor’s cracked ceiling.
Both hands squeezing the straps of your pack, you leave your throat completely exposed in order to gaze at a dark, faraway roof. The ease with which Kabru could slit your tender neck is comical, he finds it more concerning than charming. Any hoodlum or hooligan could rob and beat you blind and you’d be incapable of a proper defense.
“Let me handle it,” Kabru hopes to placate Rin with a soft grin, its success is limited because Rin’s known him long enough to push through his gushy exterior. She puts up no fight, thankfully, and let him approach you alone, “Hey!”
“Shh!” you hiss cutting your fingers along your jaw to silence him. His shock and horror at your rudeness must be visible because you wave that same hand around and smile, “Sorry. It’s just…”
Pointing up, your stare returns to the ceiling. Eyes wide and lips curled with glee. Kabru heeds and grimaces: glistening slimes the shade of clovers goop between gaping slashes in the ceiling. Pulsating and shivering as one beating organ, Kabru can’t think up a more disgusting sight.
“Slimes are sensitive to the heat we exhale, so the louder you are the easier they can find you.”
Blinking at you as inconspicuous as possible, Kabru asks, “Why stand right under them then?”
“They’re so weird. They don’t look intelligent, but they move around easily and developed such a scary way to trap prey. Pretty neat.”
Kabru has half a mind to cut you out of the party just for saying that, until you tack on a,
“Still super gross, though. We should move before they notice us.”
Kabru nods, watching you cross towards the rest of the party before following with a silent prayer that you’re not actually a monster fanatic.
His prayers are answered on the second floor -- your party is down, Holm and Daya crumpled over on opposite sides of the tree den. Kuro is strewn over a shaking, teary Mickbell with a bloody gash in his back. Rin has a similar slash, only deep in her gut and Kabru can tell she’s bleeding out fast.
While he prides himself on his wit and light thinking, Kabru is horrified by the sight of his party in agony. Planning so far ahead of himself he’s trying to scheme how to charm a passing healer into aiding Rin or reviving Holm, meanwhile he can’t even be certain he’s going to survive this attack. His own life is on the back on his mind, body stiff in preparation to swing his sword and cut off the chicken head of a charging Basilisk.
But how should he cut? It has to have a carotid artery, or a heart, but where? What if his strike is at a wrong angle and the snake side gobbles you all up.
Suddenly, the glint of your sword blinds him -- you snip the snake in half, exploiting the monster’s following stagger to round its body and stab through the Basilisk’s head. Tearing outward and splattering Kabru in blood as the beast drops.
He looks to you in silence, knees sore and wobbly and hands a shaking wreck.
Simply, you say, “The snake head is the real head, so if you attack that end first the chicken tail is distracted and easy to sneak up on,” then, you notice his trembling, “Oh, sorry…”
As if waiting for permission, Kabru’s body gives out once your hands find his shoulders. You smooth a palm over his back while shredding the loose material of your blouse to mop up the mess. Gently soaking Basilisk blood from his face with a frown marring your face, continuously murmuring apologies.
Kabru takes your wrist in his hand, blinking back his shock to sigh, “Thank you.”
Suspecting there’s more words jumbled on his tongue, you patiently wait that way: knelt beside Kabru as he squeezes your wrist.
“I think we should go back to the surface.”
You nod quickly. Much quicker than he’d assume you would given how directly you dealt with the terrifying Basilisk, “Do you want me to head back and get corpse retrievers? I doubt we could carry everyone up by ourselves.”
He takes note of how you specifically exclude Mickbell, presumably due to the young man’s hysterics.
The sharp tang of raw iron is filling Kabru’s nose, he chokes on it. He can’t stand to smell it a second more.
“No,” but inhaling through his mouth makes him taste it, rotting each bud on his tongue, “No. I’m the party leader, I should get them.”
Your eyes are lidding, no shock or awe found in the twinkle of your iris -- you were expecting this response.
“Sure, Kabru, I’ll wait with Mickbell.”
You don’t call him out on it, though.
Once the party has been revived and Kabru’s thrown the men their coins, you suggest the crew return a floor above.
“I’m sure nobody wants to eat where they died, so let’s have lunch up there and save instead of visiting a stall,” you gasp quietly and cover your mouth, then deferring to Kabru, “If that sounds good to you? Sorry… I shouldn’t have spoken so boldly like that…”
“No, you’re right,” even though he’s not looking to confirm, Kabru can feel Rin burning holes into his skull with her glare, “I think that’s a good idea.”
Secretly he’s glad no outsiders heard you make that call -- he isn’t ashamed to be bossed around by someone in a blouse, but he’s also not unrealistic. Others seeing that could threaten his meager status among the adventuring community. He’d be the wimp pushed around by his own members.
Interrupting his spiral, again, is you, “Okay, let’s get going then!” you clamp another hand over your mouth, “Right, Kabru?”
“Right.”
Thankfully, it is just your party who only finds your zealousness comedic rather than an opportunity for mutiny.
Returning visit to the first floor proves you about as useful as the initial one did.
Holm and Daya are unpacking rations with Mickbell and Kuro straggling at the edge of the blondes’ conversation. Rin is fetching water. Kabru is watching you; and he knows he should be either helping Rin, or lecturing you to help Rin, but he keeps watching.
He cannot hear you, but he knows you’re speaking -- crouched to make eye contact with a pair of slight humans. Round cheeks and marblesque eyes tell Kabru they’re just scratching at maturity. Not even thirteen.
The shorter one, a boy with freckles, picks at tender plumes of skin around his nails, knees shaking. He finds no voice, but the girl beside him does. She squeezes the shirt over her heart and her brows furrowed with passion, he can barely make out the words: mage, fourth, corpse retrievers.
One of your hands is perched on your bent knees while the other grazes along the forsaken graveyard, your head tilts and if he really forces his ears then Kabru can hear you ask, “How did you get separated?”
The girl’s shoulders go lax, lip twitching down as she sputters a reply. The boy’s picking grows frantic, his head shaking and voice shivery (this time Kabru can pick up: without her, no chance).
Kabru’s gaze hones on you, dissecting each twinge in your face as you process the information. Daya and Holm’s voices become vague, like buzzing insects, even Rin’s agitated staring from the fountain is pushed out of focus. How will you react to these children?
It's a horrible story, he’s sure. He’s so sure it’s a truly heartbreaking tale about two little ones separated from their ward on a lower level due to a snap decision from fear. However, it could also be just that: a story.
Criminals banned from The Island’s coasts often seek refuge in the bowels of the dungeon. Kabru feels confident that as this dungeon continues to fester unconquered: criminals are beginning to raise their children here.
If you blindly follow them down, you’re a fool. If you hand over all your party’s gold, you’re a fool. If you do nothing, you’re heartless. Heartlessness can be worse than foolishness, at least fools have good intentions.
Fingers wrap around the stem of a limping flower and pull, cutting it clean from the floor and holding the plant for both children. You push your hand closer to the kids, waiting until the girl grasps the flower before speaking again,
Something long winded, and judging by the shudders racketing down the boy’s frail body something rather dismal too. Yet you’re beaming up at the children, then they’re smiling as well. Rising to your feet, you brush moss stains from your knees and wave the children off with a promise Kabru can actually hear,
“If my party finds any retrievers, we’ll send them down.”
With eager nods, the kids sniffle and affirm their bravery to you -- the girl cradling the plucked daisy to her chest. You return to your party’s camp and boldly declare,
“I think we should try reaching the fourth floor soon.”
Rin bonks you with an elbow to the side, “Where’s this enthusiasm when I needed help carrying the water?”
Rubbing the tenderized area, you laugh and accept her frustration, “Sorry. Got caught up.”
“Obviously,” Rin sighs, falling to her knees around the party’s temporary camp.
Kabru sits as well, still observing as you apologize to Rin again though your eyes trailing the kids as they heft food packs onto their shoulders and begin their trek.
Mickbell settles into Kuro’s lap, Daya has begun digging into her plate while Holm ensures everyone has a filling portion. Rin agrees to dissolve the tension, meaning you two can begin gaffing amongst yourselves. As if you never left, the party is normal.
Despite your itch to reach the fourth floor as soon as possible, you don’t mention the interaction whatsoever.
Overall, Kabru considers your first dive with the party a cohesion success.
Year 515
“Don’t speak over or interrupt. Got it?”
“Okay.”
“At all.”
“Alright.”
“I’m serious,” Kabru’s eyes widen a smidge, as if to force how pertinent it is that Laios absorbs this lesson, “I’m still upset about the meeting last week.”
“I didn’t know he wasn’t done talking,” Laios frowns, shrugging in an obnoxiously coy play, the worst part being that Kabru knows Laios does it in earnest. His stupid kicked-puppy stare is entirely genuine, “That guy takes long breaths, it’s hard to tell when he’s done.”
“Well try harder to tell now,” a wave of guilt hits Kabru in the chest, heart squeezing at the sight of Laios’ frown deepening, “I don’t mean to upset you. I just… I want this to go well.”
“I do, too, you know?”
Kabru finds that hard to believe, but Laios isn’t lying to him right now. He’d know otherwise. Whether Laios can make a positive impression will have to be seen, but the man clearly has no intentions of sabotaging himself.
For all his lackluster socio-political ambitions, Laios is still a good king: insightful to the experience of commonmen and quick to new ways of strengthening their country. He has yet to give citizens, or Kabru, valid reason to question his ability to rule.
“I’m sure,” Kabru turns in his desk chair, bracing his forehead with his palm, “Let’s get this finished then.”
“But- “ Laios hesitates when he’s shot an icy glare from Kabru, “But I’m so hungry…”
As if to punctuate his torment, Laios’ stomach grumbles. Loudly. Echoing through the informal setting of Kabru’s personal quarters.
“My poor royal majesty,” Kabru coos, inked with sarcasm, “Will you survive till lunch?”
Laios’ eyes go thin, arms folding, “Don’t demean me.”
“It’s one meal. You’ll hardly die. The faster we finish this paperwork, the quicker we can usher you to breakfast.”
“I want to go now,” Laios, with no sense of self, lays his lips into the crook of his advisor’s neck. Soft, plump flesh scorching Kabru’s pulse, then a cold flash of bone: teeth, “I’m starving.”
Bladepoint canines puncture Kabru’s skin, shock blinding him to the scathing scratch till after Laios has already pulled away. Saliva stringing them together before Laios snaps it, sloppily swiping the wrist of his sleeve across his mouth.
“Disgusting,” Kabru starkly avoids eye contact by glaring at the sheen of spit on his shoulder, cupping the inflamed flesh, “Go change your shirt now, it’s not a handkerchief.”
He doesn’t remember when he first felt comfortable being so venomous around Laios, only that it's easier than trying to be pleasant all the time.
“After I eat?” Laios prompts.
“After you eat,” Kabru massages his tensing temples, working away the headache as it builds.
Upon Laios’ exit, Kabru traces the shallow indents with his fingertips -- lashes fluttering against his cheeks at the resulting faint sting. Now he’ll be forced to find a new shirt of his own, one that hides his bruising mark.
Year 513
“As long as we don’t piss off any living armor, we should be able to get to the fourth floor, at least,” you nod to yourself, hands steady and body firm as you hold up your homemade map of the area.
Raucous groans follow your cheery assessment, and a cursory glance back shows your party in disarray: Rin and Holm have heavy, discolored bags beneath their eyes. Daya is leaning against her axe with quaking arms while Mickbell coils around Kero’s shoulders. Even Kabru can admit he looks worse for wear, or assumes he does because he certainly feels at his worst.
“Oh, unless you all want to head back?” you roll the map up and wave a hand dismissively, almost seeming ashamed of the previous suggestion. Cautious to maintain a soothing and even tone, clearly doing your best to prevent any of them from feeling coddled or mocked.
Not that he truly wants to, but Kabru agrees, “Probably for the best. We’re running low on food, so we should save what we have for the journey back.”
“Makes sense,” you don’t appear disappointed or discouraged, “There’s always next time.”
“Enough optimism,” Mickbell whines, “It’s making me all nauseous.”
“Be nice,” Rin chastises, then looking at you forlorn, “You could probably carry on without us.”
Her dejected lilt prevents any accusations of wanting you to go it alone.
“No way, I’d go crazy by myself!”
Kabru reads that instantly as a lie -- if your scrunching brows and fidgeting hands weren’t telling enough then perhaps you don’t remember confessing to him your days as a solo adventurer.
You could easily carry on without the rest of the party. Hell, you could even join a better, stronger party -- the Toudens, maybe. They’d chomp at your skills if they cared even a little about their fellow men. Kabru bets you would even be able to form a party of your own with ease.
“We’re strongest when everyone’s at their best, after all,” you reassure, turning your back on the dream to hit fourth floor this crawl in favor of aiding your party’s exhaustion, “As long as we can go that deep eventually, I’ll die happily.”
Kabru doesn’t bring up how rapidly approaching the date for you to sail back home is, he gets the sense you wouldn’t want him to.
“Well don’t go keeling on us as soon as we do,” Rin’s scowl loosens, only slightly, when you smile in return and loop an arm through hers.
“Of course, not, Rin. Who else would terrorize you if I died?”
Quickly, the mage’s dark eyes flick to Kabru before returning to you, “I have an idea.”
“Oh, duh.”
Her gaze lingers on the way you’re staring at Kabru and how Kabru stares back. She must read his fondness because her forehead wrinkles up and she tugs you forward, “Yeah, duh.”
Year 515
Kabru’s foot taps impatiently, knowing it’d be improper were he to rush over and help you down from the carriage himself. But forgive the man, he’s in a hurry to have you at his side again.
He wonders if you wear the same perfume.
He wonders if you’ll take to Laios immediately, or will it take the entire two weeks before your wedding ceremony for you to warm to him?
Most of all, he wonders if he can compose himself during the entire courting process.
“Hey!”
Kabru’s mind snaps back into the present at your call, you’re charging over with an ecstatic wave. He waves back, calmer and centered towards his chest.
“It’s great to see you again!” you effortlessly knock the polite handshake Kabru extends aside to wrap your arms around his shoulders, “Imagine my surprise, the first time you send a letter is to try and marry me to a king!”
“I never found the time to write back when things finally got interesting,” Kabru bluffs, returning your hug. Warmth spreads between the both of you, if he focuses hard enough he can make out the dull thud of your heart, “Hopefully this makes up for it.”
“Definitely,” you pull back, rolling your eyes, “Father made my brother village chief while I was on The Island, so there wasn’t anything left for me to do there.”
“Perfect time to get one up on your brother. Even just marrying into royalty is better than village chief.”
You hum thoughtfully, “Let’s meet Laios Touden first. I remember he was kind of a weird guy, no?”
“He still is,” Kabru shrugs, turning to guide you into the main hall as men lug your bags towards the castle’s south wing, “He’s nice, at least. Wants to make living easier,” he glances back at you over his shoulder, “Handsome, too. You must remember what he looks like.”
“I remember he was big.”
“Strong, yeah,” Kabru slows to match paces with you through the rolling corridors, “Nice jawline, pretty eyes, and the slope of his nose isn’t terrible. He’s kind of an outstanding specimen, physically I mean.”
“Oh…” you press a hand over your mouth to keep from laughing at his rambling, “So his looks do the heavy lifting?”
“Just something to keep in mind,” he pauses outside a set of tall double doors, one hand braced against the hanging, solid black handle, and the other drawing circles into his temple, “His unique personality hasn’t faded with becoming king.”
“How interesting.”
“That’s a word for it.”
Laios is slumped comfortably back into his throne, sunlight complimenting his bored expression before he notices the pair pushing through his grandeur. Immediately, his eyes sink into you, scrawling from the top of your head to your feet in blatant observation. Staunchly, his gaze remains respectful to your modesty, indicating he’s purely sizing you up; perhaps confirming whether or not he could take you in a fight. Or to use you as a meager replacement for his monsters, studying your anatomy and mentally attaching tails and horns and heads where he sees fit.
“King Laios,” you politely remain behind Kabru. Your own gaze lurches over the king’s body as well, much less clinical than his examination -- you already know you could take him in a fight. What you want to imagine now, is if he’s the outstanding specimen that Kabru claimed, “So nice to see the Golden Kingdom for myself.”
“Prettier than the North,” Laios, much to Kabru’s unspoken irritation, scratches the back of his head without grace, “You’re from there too, right? How has it been? I haven’t been in awhile.”
“Oh, you know,” none of the men from your village look like Laios, despite their hard labor they aren’t built like him. Big. Beefy. Chewable also comes to mind; you could chew him up and be full of protein. From the little pouch of his stomach you surmise he isn’t cut or excessively defined, which drives you mad, “Same as usual. Cold and quiet.”
“Mhm. How about the monsters up top? I don’t think anybody from my village was willing to slay them,” he folds his arms, legs spreading as he readjusts for comfort, head ticking curiously, “I’ve been thinking lately that they could be overrun by monsters if nobody fights them off.”
Kabru’s irritation grows, having to claw at his thighs to restrain from choking the man. He may be older and bigger and more powerful than Kabru is, but Laios is the most painfully oblivious man in the world. He just has to be. He’s so focused on not attacking his king that Kabru almost misses how eyes scald his side at the mention of monsters overtaking the North.
“I haven’t noticed anything unusual,” and you mean that, the North truly is as boring as it was when you were growing up, “Maybe more acceptance for magic, but that’s mostly to combat the increase in ghosts.”
“Increase in ghosts,” Laios’ eyes bulge, posture straightening out in vivid excitement, “Do they know why there’s so many? Do they just wander around, or do they remain in cemeteries?”
“Ah, King Laios,” you try to hide the way your eyes bounce repeatedly towards Kabru’s rigid frame. His hands are balled, even shaking, and his stare is aimed over the king’s right shoulder, “Perhaps we could get some privacy before discussing such things?” you boldly step forward, correctly assuming Laios would take no offense at the intrusion, “We should get to know each other on our own.”
“Oh, right!” Laios waves a dismissal towards Kabru, apologizing for holding the man so long.
You don’t ask Kabru if he’s okay before he leaves, but you take one of his hands and squeeze it gingerly. Smiling tenderly and bidding him well. A soft halo of gold ringing around your head from sunlight pouring through glass panes.
“Don’t let- ” just as he’s apologizing for his king, you silence Kabru.
“I’ll form my own opinion,” you release his hand, still grinning, “You trust me, don’t you?” he nods, of course he does, “So trust me to gather my own thoughts, okay?”
Oh, God that cannot be a good sign.
Please, please, please -- he’s contemplating getting on his knees to pray outside the doors -- please don’t let his reaction to Laios’ monster obsession make you hate the king. You’re his only choice, the only one that will do!
You’re kind and strong willed and beautiful and he’d love to have you living under the same roof as himself.
Not that that has anything to do with his decision. No, no, that would be idiotic.
That would be the worst plan he’s ever planned in his entire life. So, he’s glad it's separate from his real motivation.
At least, he’s glad until that night. Alone in his bed with only moonlight shining along his pristine sheets.
For hours Kabru has been cooped in his room, and technically he’s been cooped in his mind even longer. Since the second a passing pair of guards relieved him from lingering outside the throne room, Kabru blindly stumbled through his messy thoughts.
Worse now than ever before is the desperation to know. Clawing him apart from the inside out. He needs to know.
To know what you’re feeling. To know what’s being said. To know why you two never came out, even hours after Kabru left. In explicit detail, he must know. What you like about Laios, what you don’t, what you find attractive, if you got hot in the face when you saw him, if you ever felt that way about Kabru, if you think Kabru’s attractive, if you accepted his invitation just because Kabru sent it or because you truly wanted to meet Laios.
He can’t just ask, so now he must meticulously set up a series of precision events to fish the information out.
Because your hesitance to emphatically accept the proposal confuses Kabru. You’ve never been particularly picky about partners, but you’re not the type for manufacturing attraction to spare a person’s feelings. So theory one is that Laios is not physically appealing to you.
Though not even that explanation makes sense. To be short, Kabru doesn’t understand how you couldn’t be attracted to Laios. Such strong, determined features demanded attention; and trust, the attention would be positive.
Broad shoulders and meaty thighs, Laios’ build is admirable on its own: Kabru could sink his teeth into Laios’ bicep and never cut bone. Aside from that is the healthy fluff of blonde hair his king keeps trimmed, as well as his face. Remaining clean shaven gives an air of proper hygiene and self-sufficiency that makes Laios seem more attractive.
Kabru cannot fathom how you’re not preparing vows yet.
That thought makes him shoot up in bed, eyes wide and a hand curled into his churning gut.
Why can’t Kabru fathom how you’re not preparing vows? Why does he find it so peculiar?
That type of questioning, this obsession -- it implies Kabru wants to prepare vows, doesn’t it?
With ragged grumbling Kabru collapses back into his mattress, letting his fried brain melt through his ears as he finally attempts giving in to sleep.
…
He wakes to a nightmare the next morning -- you and Laios are alone in the great hall, sitting shoulder-to-shoulder on the end closest to the kitchen. Chairs pushed so close the armrests are peeling against each other, elbows knocking as Laios forgoes all table etiquette. Not once do you scold or demean him. Instead seeming too engrossed at the ear-nibbling of shapeshifter trivia Laios is laying down.
“Did you ever run into one?” Laios asks, eyes a little too glittery for someone who must’ve woken quite early for this private breakfast, “My dad had our dogs follow herds so we could spot them in the flock.”
“Dogs can tell which sheep are fakes?”
“Oh, yeah! Dogs can tell by the smell,” Laios taps his nose, “I wonder what the difference is, don’t you? Do they smell more sweet, like dirt? Or do they have no smell at all since their illusions?”
“Maybe a Kobold would be able to tell you? Their anatomy is dog-like, after all.”
“I thought so, too! But there’s not many Kobolds native to the North.”
“Well, hopefully you can find out one day,” then you bite for more monster facts, “I did always wonder what my own shapeshifter could look like. Don’t they read people’s minds to make their copies?”
Laios’ silverware clatters away, tinking loudly on the glass plate, hands flexing hysterically, heart jumping to his tongue, “They do, they take other people’s interpretations of you to confuse your company into keeping it around.”
“How thrilling,” you muse.
“It’s a shame I’ll never get to see or make another one,” he lifts his fork, pushing meat and eggs around his plate glumly, “Would’ve been fun to see what you look like in my memory compared to the real thing.”
“You can tell me now,” your palm bares his shoulder, leaning over your chair and towards his own. Laios’ honey eyes dip, tracing the shape of your lips which makes you lean even closer, “How is it that you see me, Laios? Would I be flattered?”
“I hope so,” he blurts.
Kabru backs away, rattling door hinges before slumping back into the corridor. Rotten thoughts of how lovely you are corroding his brain. You’re so lovely to nip at your betrothed’s interest wholeheartedly, no matter how unconventional.
You’re so lovely it's all consuming.
You’re so lovely he can’t remember when or why, exactly, he fell in love with you.
You’re so lovely he thinks he might have just always been your emotional pin cushion.
There remains to be a single thing Kabru could name that made him fall in love with you.
Kindness is much too bland of a trait. And you wanted the wellbeing of others, but that’s something Kabru expects from people. You are pretty, but that’s no reason to daydream about buying a house together. Perhaps it was a combination of all three that mixed lethally well with how much time you spent together.
That, with how detrimental party romances are to group fallouts, maybe made you more desirable? Could that be it?
You were a new, fascinating person he couldn’t pick apart as soon as he gazed upon you, and you knew exactly how to swerve his expectations. You loved listening to him mutter about the interlocked nature of humans: one man cheating on his wife in Kahka Brud undoing a port in Melini. But you stepped away from interpersonal Island gossip. You could rattle out seven variations of man-eating plants but couldn’t stand to even look upon the vegetation without grimacing.
Approachable with a thin smile and batting lashes, beautiful and quiet. Very quiet. You hardly ask anything of others. It should make you seem ominous or menacing, but no part of him feels endangered by you.
Kabru always felt so comfortable around you that, despite knowing his other party members longer, he found you the easiest to converse with. Before he could realize himself, you’d crawled over so many emotional walls without letting him bypass a single one of your own.
You’re his worst nightmare, he craves you more than oxygen.
Year 513
The tavern door opens with an outrageous squeal. If the mood were different, then you would probably make a humorous remark about the aged hinges. But the mood isn’t different. Things are tense and he just wants to go home now.
Even twinkling stars blink away to avoid giving his humiliation anymore attention. Moonlight rudely oozes over you both, though, reminding him how much he prefers the sun. The moon always seems to follow him when he’s whirled in his worst turmoil.
You step into the tavern first, holding the cranky door open for him. He’d thank you like the upstanding young man his mother raised… if only the mood were different.
Silently, Kabru trails behind you, cheeks blistering hot and palms moist, with his head bent. You two make it back to the table circled by your party, sans Daya due to a more pressing engagement with her fiance. Rin’s perma-scowl cracks briefly into blatant shock at his slouch before schooling herself into re-wrinkling her face. Confusion curling into the folds of her glabella.
“What happened?”
Per usual, you answer for Kabru, “Nothing.”
“Nothing?” anger seems to flash briefly over her for a moment, a spasm so minute only Kabru can spot it, “Really?”
He’s not surprised she’s upset about him, shamefully, trying to woo you during a night out with the party. What surprises him is that her anger is solely directed at you.
At least until you nod firmly, “Nothing happened, Rin.”
Then pity laxes her irritation, she spares Kabru a flicker of eye contact before mumbling an ‘okay’. She ends up remaining largely silent for the rest of the night, only extending responses when directly prompted.
What else surprises him is the ease with which you lie. Something happened, just not how he wanted it to play out.
Maybe he didn’t notice because of his drowned mood, but Kabru swears you didn’t exhibit any of your usual tells when you spoke.
(the fact he harps on your physical tells will make him so mad he cries later tonight)
Year 515
“He’s going to burn their ear off, I’m telling you…” Marcille grumbles.
“I think it's cute,” Falin grins.
“Of course, you do,” Marcille sighs, though smiling fondly at the girl while scritching around her plumage. Falin chirps happily and nuzzles into Marcille’s shoulder, “He’s your brother, you never think he’s as weird as he is.”
Kabru speaks boldly, which he knows is unlike himself but he’s so eager to show that he knows you more than them that he cannot stop himself, “They can bond over the monster talk, at least.”
“Are they even into monsters?”
“Kind of?” he backtracks, realizing that he isn’t sure how to answer her question, “They hate monsters, but they know a lot.”
“Good on you for finding someone like that, then,” Marcille shrugs, “They might actually have a good marriage.”
Kabru tenses, even though he shouldn’t (because he knows why you’re here, so he can’t exactly get depressed when other people bring it up), “Yeah. They will.”
“For a while, I thought you’d marry my brother,” Falin says suddenly. Eyes sharp on Kabru’s figure.
Marcille guffaws, “Why would you say that?”
She shrugs before letting her eyes relax to their usual serene state, “They get along well. And Laios likes him. Laios doesn’t usually like people.”
“I guess you have a point,” Marcille waves a figurative flag before gesturing to the room around them, “But we’re not planning their wedding.”
“Yeah…” Falin sighs like she’s the one most disappointed.
Kabru says nothing, only returning to the list of ale and wine suppliers eager to vend for the upcoming royal wedding. His eyes skim names he’s heard various reviews for, but his brain takes none of them in. Rather, he’s fixated on what Falin said.
She could see it?
Could they have gotten married?
If Kabru forgot you completely, or even better never met you, could it be him stepping up to the altar? Would Laios have him?
Laios doesn’t usually like people. but in crowded meetings, it's solely Kabru that Laios searches for. And it’s the sight of Kabru that makes Laios sigh in relief. And it’s the sound of Kabru’s voice that Laios waits for before delivering a response.
At dinner, back when they ate together before you monopolized mealtimes, Laios always ensured Kabru had twice his fill before calling it a night.
(“Even though we’re not fighting in a dungeon anymore, I still think you should retain your strength.”
“You sound like you just like watching me eat.”
“Maybe that, too. You have a nice mouth.”
Kabru never responded to that, too petrified over the implications. Now he thinks he probably should have, maybe it would have meant he’d be marrying a king.)
Falin was right in that Laios doesn’t take to people easily, and he’s sure that’s all she meant. But Kabru knows that her statement is a criminal oversimplification of Laios.
Laios likes people so much he’s gone on potentially endless, potentially fruitless, endeavors for them. Laios likes people so much he makes them harpy eggs because they seem minorly interested in monster cuisine. Laios likes people so much he makes sure they’re treated with the utmost dignity. Laios loves people, and suddenly the thought of you becoming one of those select people is getting harder to grieve.
Laios’ love is not limited, but now Kabru’s forced to come to terms with the fact that Laios’ romantic love for him is--
“So, did you pick yet?” Marcille and Falin are swatching fabrics from the cushy loveseat of the main library, “I’ve heard of a roach outbreak in Smisson’s breweries, so I hope you didn’t get attached.”
Kabru jolts upright and shakes his head, saying the first dumb thing he can think of, “I heard of that, too.”
Falin giggles, “He’s the one that told you about it, Marcille.”
“Huh? You’re kidding!” a furious blush overtakes the elf, “I’m sorry, I don’t know how I forgot that!”
Kabru shakes his head again, swallowing roughly, “It’s fine.”
Really, it’s all fine.
Year 513
“Everyone wanted to be here,” Kabru chuckles quietly, as if raising his voice could somehow wake the entire Island.
“I’m sure,” there’s no hint of sarcasm in your voice, “They were with me late last night, so… I didn’t really expect anyone to see me off,” you giggle softly, a hollow sound he doesn’t take very kindly, “I’m surprised you made it.”
“It’s the least I could do after everything you gave the party,” with no decorum he scratches the back of his neck, and avoids looking you in the face, “It’ll be harder in the dungeon without you.”
“I believe in you.”
His breath hitches. He looks at you. A barely-there smile and tired eyes. It may be the most honest he’s seen you. He’s tempted to ask how you meant that ‘you’, but doesn’t.
He doesn’t even speak until you’re boarded -- until he’s forced to raise his voice so you can hear him over a bustling crew and fellow passengers.
“If I send letters, will you read them?” Kabru silences you before you can open your mouth, “Will you respond?”
Then, you’re smiling wider, and your eyes are tight with joy. It isn’t the usual siren cant of droopy lids, it’s pure elation. You’re laughing at his question, shoulders bouncing gleefully. You’re nodding. You speak between chortles, as if he asked you what color the sky was.
“Of course, I will!”
You look more beautiful than he’s ever seen you before.
“Okay, I’ll write you, then.”
“You better!”
Your ship rocks as it sets off from the dock, but you don’t disappear beneath the ridge. In fact, you almost hang over it, torso flattening against wood and nails digging for purchase as you wave.
Kabru waves back. He runs down the dock like a fool, barely catching himself from tumbling into the lapping ocean.
“Bye, Kabru!” you’re still smiling, bathed in soft orange and soothing yellow -- your voice grows distant over crashing waves, “I’ll miss you!”
He keeps waving. He waves and he waves and he doesn’t stop until your ship is behind the horizon. Only then does his hand fall to his side, eyes sopping wet and chest squeezing.
He feels pathetic.
He misses you already.
Year 515
Days prior this morning, the grand hall was cleared out -- pews replaced the needlessly long cherry oak dining table. Flowers plotted in tall carved vases with white lace and silk choking the necks, a velvet track from the altar through open doors to the courtyard. People from across the continents were invented, diplomats to friendly nobles to acquaintances Laios does not remember to true friends to your father and brother and Falin.
(“You don’t want to invite your parents?” Kabru re-evaluates his list of guests, “Seems uncouth, no?”
“What do I care?” Laios’ legs are splayed, thighs pressing against either side of the gold throne, “A wedding is meant to be happy, why would I need people I don’t like there?” he knocks a fist back into Kabru’s chest, letting his knuckles linger over the man’s heart only as long as he can say, “I have you, and my betrothed, and my friends. Really, that’s all I need.”
“It’d be rude to- ”
“I get it,” Laios’ hand falls back onto his armrest, fingertips skimming the rounded metal edge, “This is why I’m leaving it to you, I trust you.”)
Out of all the tedious preparation, dressing Laios was the most tragic in that the king hated everything the handmaids and servants stuffed him in. Countless hours were wasted before they begged Kabru to help, only then did the king settle:
No crown, terminally unsurprising, since Laios abhorred the weight and feel of it on his head. Rather, he would adorn himself with that dreadful Winged Lion’s pelt, and a vermillion cotehardie reaching mid-thigh with gold trim. Leather belt tethered around his waist gave the fabric shape whilst holding up loose britches. Daggered teeth of various beasts lined his neck, which Kabru was privy to each and every complaint over the sensory nightmare they provided. He’s sure as soon as Laios can, he’ll be tearing the necklace off.
Dressing himself, regardless of Laios’ multiple emphatic encouragements, was a similar exercise in disaster:
It felt massively inappropriate to wear something so shiny and attractive as gold on another man’s wedding night, even as Laios insisted Kabru wear whatever he pleased. Still, Kabru chose silver earrings and accents. Sparkling and flattering, yes, but nothing so bold. He did splurge with a sapphire blue kirtie that made his eyes shine brighter, and a simple chain of pearls. He felt attractive, and joyous.
Joyous for tonight. Joyous for a wedding! Yes, simply so ecstatic for tonight’s marriage.
Truthfully, Kabru is so overjoyed for his king, he really could just fucking die.
From joy. And happiness.
Because what makes it even better is how you look happy. Actually happy. No low gaze or siren simper, just pure, carefree merriment as you link hands with Laios. Reciting vows from a flushed, teary-eyed Marcille. Neither of you has that gleam or honeydew sparkle of pure love, but Kabru is good at his job: zero doubt swims in his mind that you two will be a pair truly enamored with each other.
His misery must be unfiltered in the back of the grand hall, far behind the rest of the wedding party, because Rin’s dark eyes are piercing through the side of his skull. She’s frowning up at him, arms folded.
She murmurs, “You should’ve said something.”
Kabru grins at her sardonically, “I should’ve broken up their engagement? You didn’t even like us interacting when they were in our party.”
“That’s- !” her cheeks stain red, an annoyed huff rattling her whole body, “They never told you why they rejected you, right?”
Kabru’s silence is answer enough. It’s also more unsettling to Rin than any dungeon monster she’d encountered.
“They knew that I wanted you,” Rin clears her throat, embarrassment trying to choke her into silence, but she overcomes it for the sake of her friend, “So, out of respect, you were refused and never told why.”
Kabru loves Rin, as a sister. He loves her so much he’d kill for her, because she’s like his sister. He loves her so so so much that he cannot even be mad at her, because part of him always considered her somewhat to blame for your rejection of him.
For an agonizing, silent few seconds, Kabru just stares down at her with those crystalline eyes. Blinking himself from his stupor, Kabru asks the dumbest question he could think of, “Did they want to say yes?”
Rin’s frown deepens, forehead wrinkling, “Is that something you really want to know?”
Laios is a terrible kisser, and out of respect you cover your mouths with a hand as he maps out your lips with eyes clenched. Kabru told him not to close his eyes too early, and naturally Laios did not listen. Thankfully you’re there, hiding Laios’ possible humiliation with one hand and guiding him with your other on his jaw.
“No,” Kabru sighs, “Not really.”
That’s the biggest lie he might’ve ever told Rin.
Still she pats his back sympathetically, even laying her head against his shoulder.
Celebration begins, food laid free for grabbing and wine flowing like water -- especially into Kabru’s gaping maw. It's sour on his tongue, but as far as he’s seen it's him alone that scrunches his face and shakes out his hair at the taste, which only has him feeling crazier.
.
.
.
“Isn’t this foul?” Kabru scoffs, slumped over one of the many strewn tables in the general ballroom, cramped posture making him seem smaller. Ordinarily this is embarrassing. Ordinarily he’s not drunk.
“I don’t notice anything,” Chilchuck swigs from the clear chalice in his hand.
Marcille takes a civilized sip for herself, unspoken concern that their friend’s taste in alcohol is not utmost dependable, “I don’t notice anything either.”
Kabru swirls his wine, staring into the dark spiral and wondering if a bug of some type sensed his grim mood and decided to drown itself and poison his cup.
“I’m going to get a new drink, then,” Kabru rises, bidding the pair well as he guns for the barrels of frothy ale.
People cheer and clack maizers, spilling various toxic cures onto the floor making his shoes stick with loud clicks. Something he doesn’t bother with knowing Laios will seek him out once the stains are discovered.
Laios, Laios, Laios: speaking of.
Kabru’s gaze floats across the party to find his king, who is staring off with hands fidgeting in the drape of his Winged Lion’s pelt as your father speaks. An unfortunate sight, one he’s itching to rectify when a lengthy gown flows into his vision.
Dashing and soft and yours.
Sage fabric glides along the floor, intricately sewn floral trim skittering along the ground. Flowers of lace and yarn decorate the bust and sleeves, even a crown of colorful buds blooms atop your head. Rings of gold link around your fingers. Hair swept away to unveil your face, coiled and braided with, unbelievably, more flowers dancing between the tresses. Faint lavender and tangerine lingers around you in a hypnotizing haze, culling lovestruck head-turns of men and women with your every step.
“Your husband’s alone with your father.”
“They’ll come out alive, or we’ll hear them killing each other,” you pull out a seat at the longest central table and gesture to the chair directly beside you, “Sit. We never got to properly catch up.”
Kabru sees you have wine. He suddenly craves the sour grape flavor (maybe all he was missing was the sensation of licking it off your lips). From what he remembers, Laios was holding wine as well. Kabru considers stretching out to steal a second taste.
Although, sugary enough is the sound of your voice, suddenly his fresh mug of ale is entirely forgotten.
“Kabru?”
You’re so pretty, Kabru could tear his eyes out now and not miss a single greater sight. Especially when you’re -again- bathed in the pouring gold sunlight through grand windows, tranquil beside him at the long table. As if there isn’t a single other spot you prefer, you sit right next to him with a chalice of the worst wine he’s ever had.
“Hey, Kabru…”
His hands shake with the need to hold you. Chest raging with his uncontrollable heartbeat. His head hurts with the knowledge that there really isn’t a place he prefers more than by you (even if he’s forced to drink alcohol so foul it's comparable to sewage).
“Kabru,” your touch startles him, pout and knitted brows capturing his whole attention, “You’re not even listening to me!” you laugh, shaking off his incompetence so easily it makes him want to thank you with a kiss, “Are you drunk?”
“Huh?” he lowers his head into his hands, “Yes,” he lies to you, “Yes, that must be it.”
“Poor thing, I thought you were better at holding your liquor.”
“Your memory is fading…”
“Oh, well, suppose me and the king will have to tuck you in. Make sure you get to bed safely without bumping into anything expensive.”
Kabru gags, pushing himself up from his seat and dashing towards the nearest bathroom to empty the contents of his stomach (wine, mead, beer, and beer’s good brother ale).
Tears sting his eyes, snot beginning to leak from his nose as he spits into the toilet bowl. You and the king. The king and you. You and Laios: married. Perfect union. And Kabru did it all to himself. He wanted so desperately to drink himself under the table to forget, and you just had to go reminding him.
You are the worst person he’s ever met, and so is Laios! Your commitment to respect is disgusting, and Laios’ trust in him is an absolute travesty. You two should just hurry up and keel over instead of shoving your romance in Kabru’s face; and if either of you ever thanks him for setting you up then he’ll gut you both that very instant.
Laios and you are terrible, awful, no good devils -- and he wants you both so bad he’s vomiting in the bathroom on your wedding night.
Maybe he can send you both off on a honeymoon? Yes, yes. And while you’re away, he’ll drown in responsibility by day and pretty faces by night. Upon your return, he’ll have forgotten he was ever smitten.
No, who is he kidding? That would be a pointless venture.
You’d be so giddy to tell Kabru allllll about your trip while Laios would show off trinkets he picked up with that charming smile, Kabru would fall right back here. Puking and crying. He should just resign totally. Rot away in bed and die so he never has to see either of you again.
How cowardly.
How unbecoming.
Kabru could kick himself.
Rin was in his position more or less (...less, though, definitely less) and still had the nerve to face him every day for years. She didn’t run away, and she didn’t make her party suffer because of her feelings -- so how could Kabru extend the kingdom’s wellbeing over his? Without him, Laios would socially drown with a village chief’s firstborn as a life preserver.
You’re smart and well-versed in reading others, but you’re not Kabru for God’s sake. You can’t apply half of what you know, not to mention you don’t even care to learn.
Wiping off his mouth and flushing the toilet, Kabru stumbles toward the doorway with a prayer in his pocket to find water soon.
Returning to the chipper scene, Kabru can instantaneously spot Laios flagging him down, with his spare hand curved into the base of your spine.
He dodges you both and retires to bed. Lightheaded and miserable, he’s asleep quickly.
Then, suddenly, he’s not.
.
.
.
He’s outside Laios’ room.
Did his feet carry him here subconsciously? How pathetic…
Kabru is fully prepared to turn back and amble to his room when there’s a sound from the other side of the door. A sharp gasp and whine, then your giggling, and Laios’ voice pleading for you to be nice to him. More murmuring, then a soft moan. A lofty sigh.
Song of a consummation.
Foolishly, Kabru hadn’t thought that your sex life was something he’d have to encounter directly. And despite knowing he should step away, if not out of honor then at least to preserve his own heart, Kabru’s curiosity bolts him to the floor.
He’s never seen Laios fuck.
He’s never seen you fuck, either.
He feels compelled to study -- how does your subdued front mesh with Laios’ eager hands? Which of you takes control? With his bigger size and more powerful title, one would assume Laios, but Kabru bets it's you. Will you make him wait? Would he dive between your thighs with fervor? How will the lip stain your ladies painted you with look slathered across Laios’ pale skin?
Despite knowing what it says about his character, Kabru stays. On some level to get it through to himself that you two are together and off-limits; and on a deeper, truer level because he’s sick in the head.
As was the plan anyway, until a booming, “Hey!” echoes from down the dim hall. A guardsman fast approaching from his patrol route. Kabru’s face is hidden by the dark, figure easily mistaken for a passing servant. But even if the guard could recognize him, would it matter?
What reason does the royal advisor have for lingering outside his king’s chambers so late into the night?
Lies fly through Kabru’s brain as the guard bristles closer, none of them plausible. Finally, the idea of killing this man cycles through his mind, and he reconciles with the fact that must be his only option to avoid an obscenity charge.
“Oh, you came!” a soft hand lands between Kabru’s shoulder blades, voice floating past him and to the guard now two feet away, “Thank you for your faithful service, but don’t concern yourself with him. Our king summoned him,” your laugh soothes Kabru’s tensed muscles, “I wasn’t sure he’d make it because of the hour.”
Kabru stares at you, not bothering to hide his confused, jaw-hanging stare as the guard retreats to his typical patrol.
A thin silk robe drapes over you, loosely tied at the waist and exposing much of your chest.
“I never took you for a pervert, Kabru,” such a mellow voice makes even your scalding accusation sound sweet. You whirr him around by the arm and lug him into yours and Laios’ newly shared room. All proprieties trapped outside but trepidation slithers through, lodging in his gullet.
Laios lays on the bed, exposed completely. Tousled sheets bunched between his hands and under his thighs. Cheeks flushed redder than the head of his cock, hard and slapped against his stomach. Wide spread thighs and heaving chest bountiful eye candy.
“How’d you know it was him?” Laios sounds devastatingly breathless, eyes low and ruby lips swollen.
“Hunch,” you answer plainly, petting down Kabru’s arm until your fingers lace with his.
Kabru murmurs your name, wide eyed. You knew?
Of course, you knew. How could he have thought anything else? Your calm nature about the whole ordeal solidifies that you must’ve known for a long while. Longer than him, even. When would you have figured it out?
“He’s beautiful,” you perch your chin on Kabru’s shoulder, cooing into his ear, “You were always so focused on his face, you’ve never gotten to see anything beneath his clothes, have you?”
Oh, right. The very first day you got here, obviously.
Laios rolls his head from one shoulder to the other, brows pinching in frustration, heated gaze straying from Kabru to you, “He’s going to touch me, right?”
“Depends,” your hands skim up Kabru’s spine, nudging him forward, “Kabru, do you want to touch your king?” one arm glides around his front, fingers toying with the band of his trousers, “And myself?”
“Uhhh…” can he be honest with himself? Can he lay himself bare before not one, but two people? Two people he’s interested in above all else. Heat laps from the barrel of his chest, scorching from cheeks to ears to forehead as sweat beads along his hairline and the back of his neck.
“I asked a question. I need a response.”
Laios’ cock twitches against his abdomen, throat croaking around desire.
“Yes,” Kabru exhales, heavy, barbed, and thorny, cutting him up inside until he’s too weak to stand. Sinking onto the mattress by his knees, “I will.”
Laios’ eyes flick from Kabru’s face down to his weepy erection.
He wants Laios in his mouth. Wants the warmth slapping his tongue, burrowing towards the cinch of his throat. He wants to grope the bulge his king forces through his neck and feel your hands buried in his dark hair. The latter need is fulfilled, your fingers combing through dark curls to push him into your husband’s crotch.
“What a pretty mouth, Kabru, you love to run it,” you climb onto the bed beside him, holding Laios steady by the base, “Try something new, hm?”
“New is- ”
“Try it, Kabru. Now,” regardless of the choppy demand, your voice remains dulcet. Pillowy and fluffy. He could melt into your sound.
His tongue lolls to slather the underside of Laios’ cock with hot saliva, enveloping the man in his mouth. Cheeks hollowing and lashes batting wetly up at the king, crimson deepening on Laios’ face. Behind him, the mattress dips and shakes, Laios’ eyes jumping from baby blues to over Kabru’s back, hips jerking against his chin.
Your hand lifts from inky hair, curls slipping between your fingers in vain attempts to tether you against his skull. Now both your palms run up Laios’ chest as you mold against his side. Your thighs spread around one of his arms and robe nowhere to be found, painted lips smear rouge up Laios’ neck and cheek before you claim his lips.
One of Laios’ hands cradles Kabru’s head, not rudely pushing nor wrangling his hair, just an affectionate reminder of whose cock is in his throat. Meanwhile, the hand between your thighs crooks towards your heat, middle finger ringing your clit -- earning a jump and heave from you.
Laios coaxes Kabru off, winded as he requests, “Can you two kiss? Please?”
Kabru gives the king no time to abjure before he’s spearing you with attention, not that you’re more patient; hurriedly cupping his cheeks and legs spreading to welcome him between. Sat up enough to give Laios a proper view, Kabru fondles your ass as you happily cram your lips to his. He wonders if your lip stain wipes off on him as well. He hopes it does.
“So beautiful,” Laios muses stroking his cock, casually flicking his wrist and thumbing the head, as you reach for Kabru’s.
Kabru’s lips sear down your neck, urged to bite. He does not.
“Soft, right?” Laios lays his head against your shoulder, poking obnoxiously into Kabru’s space (not that he minds), “Still sweet with wine.”
You taste better than the fucking wine.
Does Laios?
Your lips curl, drifting away just to whisper against his lips, “Would you like to kiss the king?”
“Can I?”
Before you can reaffirm, Laios snatches Kabru by the chin to kiss him.
Laios is not sweet like wine, he tastes like beer and salt and iron from a raw lip, and yet Kabru cannot drink him down fast enough.
Hands, big and calloused and sweltering, brand Kabru’s hips -- spinning him around to face the door as you unwork the man’s nightshirt. Tossing the flowy cloth aside, you press a final kiss to Kabru’s lips, before laying out beneath him.
Kabru’s eyes hone on the honeydew slick glossing your slit, hands scrambling for perch on your bracketing thighs as Laios’ settle on his ass. Anticipation builds and flows out of his mouth, rich and thick and in the form of a lashing tongue. Broad and cozy, Kabru sweeps up your cunt, thumbs parting you for the purest taste. Audible sighs fan over your pelvis in time with Laios burying his spit-slick fingers into Kabru’s hole.
A groan vibrates through your hips, Kabru’s electric eyes flashing over the quiver in your thighs as you grind onto his nose. Both hands knotting through his hair.
Fingers prod inside you, curling toward your stomach before scissoring apart just to noisily slurp out leaking wetness.
Burly hands rearrange Kabru again, manhandling him until he’s got his back against Laios’ chest with legs thrown out across the bed. Exhilaration surges through Kabru’s whole body, extremities jittering and whines dribbling down his lips. Slowly, he’s lowered onto Laios’ cock with teeny rasps inspiring you to grab him by the shoulders. Again, sweet lips meet his, but he realizes the ploy quickly: torturous pleasure rips through his gut as you push him back to prime for riding.
Laios’ hand finds your chest, tweaking your nipple while snapping his hips up. Pounding into Kabru’s clenching hole in time that you sink down on the poor man.
Over Kabru’s shoulder, you and Laios swap spit with noisy kisses and if he weren’t sweating ecstasy then maybe he’d find the power to be embarrassed over his desperation to join. Regardless of getting his brains ground into mush by your combined, incessant pistoning, Kabru finds himself giddy to be involved further.
You’re purposeful and elegant; excruciating, tantalizing bounces with nails digging into the meat of Kabru’s chest. As if you could easily tear him apart, only dangling in front of him like a carrot-drawn-horse.
Laios is frantic and overwhelming; hips unrelenting and thick muscled arms belting Kabru against him. Skin clapping skin, moist with sweat, and fat rippling from the impacts of Laios’ fucking. Each thrust into Kabru sends him rocketing further inside you; bulging deep, deep in your squelching cunt.
Contrasting in all ways -- your hands pet and scratch while Laios’ anchor and tug, you moan and mewl while Laios groans and growls. When you’re not kissing your husband you impress downy lips upon Kabru’s chest while Laios tears bruises from his neck with full teeth.
Passion swells each suck and stroke and pap, pap, pap until Kabru’s bursting from the inside out. He keens, body tensing.
“Breathe,” Laios huffs into his ear, voice low and crackling, “Breathe, it feels better when you don’t tighten up.”
Kabru heeds, blowing hot air across your bare chest as he cums, and you coo, “Good boy.”
A slush of your combined juices cascades, soaking and matting Kabru’s pubes. Wetting his and Laios’ balls. Three hard rams and Laios is spilling inside Kabru as well. Pants and gulps echoing around the room.
Reclining against the headboard, Laios slowly pulls your exhausted body off Kabru before slipping his cock out of the man. Each of you is fully aware the hygienic option is to wash yourselves, change the sheets, and maybe even comb through messy heads of hair.
None of you do, though.
Laios, grinning bright and alluring as the sun, has an arm nestled around both you and Kabru to keep you flush against his sides. Your head finds a pillow in your husband’s chest, Kabru copying the motion. Swamped exhales pass between yours and Kabru’s blissed out faces, but only measured breaths pull a serene rise and fall from Laios. Drool even leaks from the corner of Kabru’s mouth, he groans in disgust but can’t manage the strength to wipe it away. Neither can you, exhaustion poisoning you from the knees up.
A careful thumb dabs the spittal away, only to grossly end up smearing it across Kabru’s shoulder when Laios replaces his hand on the man’s bare arm.
“How…” Kabru shudders for breath, “Why…” his eyes flutter drowsily, “Not tired…?”
“I didn’t do much,” Laios reasons (whether he genuinely thinks that or is bluffing, nobody can be sure), voice low as he notices you’re beginning to drift asleep, “Wore yourselves out, though.”
“Still…” Kabru huffs defiantly, yawning against the moist valley between Laios’ pecs, “I… more stamina…”
“Ass,” you drowsily pitch in, eyes closed and lashes stark against your cheeks.
“Ass?” Laios looks down at Kabru.
“Ass,” Kabru yawns again, now capable of slurring full sentences together with his breath sufficiently caught, “First time taking it in the ass. Probably took more out of me than I expected…”
“You should’ve said something,” Laios lours, “Even monsters like Orcs that have sex for pleasure stretch their partners more than I did. It helps prevent tearing. I wish I could’ve seen more mating rituals before getting cursed.”
“You could read more…”
Kabru’s too tired to negate your yawn of a suggestion. He doesn’t need to before Laios mutters again, seconds away from passing out altogether,
“I’ve read about them a lot, I just wanted to see it for myself.”
Year 515. Some days later.
Laios suddenly turns in his throne, angling his body towards Kabru, “You think I can make polyamorous marriage legal?”
“Why?” Kabru’s sure he knows exactly where the king’s head is, he just wants to hear the man say it.
Sticking out his thumb, index, and middle finger, Laios scrunches the digits towards his palm twice, “Aren’t we all getting married?”
“You’ll have to ask your real spouse about that first.”
“I did.”
“Huh?!” that makes Kabru’s heart explode, blood and meat blowing through his orifices. Teasing Laios is easy now that he more clearly understands the man’s motives, but you?
You’re intimidating even after he’s been inside you, he doesn’t know how Laios can so casually ask you something like that (he does though, it’s due to Laios’ many loose screws).
“I already asked about us marrying you.”
“And…?”
“They thought it was a good idea!” Laios shakes off, as if Kabru should have just known you would go along with your husband’s insanity, “So, can I legalize it?”
“Probably,” Kabru settles a hand over his chest, hoping to calm his racing heart (or what remains, anyway), “I’ll look into it.”
“Yay! Thank you!”
~~~
kabru miserablism POV my beloved
beast laios and fae reader and treasure kabru imagery makes me so hard
#laios touden x reader#kabru x reader#laios x kabru#labru x reader#laios x reader x kabru#laios touden smut#kabru smut#dungeon meshi x reader#i spent so long staring at this thing i don't wanna look at it anymore omg
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MINI SKIRT
SYNOPSIS ⮕ You know Jake Sim and you love Prada, it was already a perfect combination. You just happened to always be in the same place as him, at the same time. And that place just happened to be the Prada store. It’s not your fault that your Prada collection expands as your interactions grow. Especially not considering that Jake couldn’t stop himself from fawning over you (and your mini skirts).
PAIRING ⮕ idol!jake x fem!reader
GENRE + WARNINGS + TROPES ⮕ smau. idol x fan [kinda]. forbidden love. fake relationship. love triangle [brief]. warnings will be added on each chapter.
STATUS ⮕ STARTED! march 15
TAGLIST ⮕ OPEN! send an ask or comment to be added
FEAT ⮕ minseo [woo!ah]. minju [illit]. haemin [8turn]. taesan [boynextdoor]. sunwoo [ the boyz].
A/N ⮕ okay so i’m actually releasing this one before any upcoming ones + this has been in the drafts since january 😍
PROFILES
| bunnies
| prada lovers (by force)
| homies
| fan accs
CHAPTERS
| one : no homo but i’d smash
| two : prenup <3
| three : forgot you homie hopped 😭
| four : em sowwy
| five : don’t speak beabadoobee to me
| six : jake sim? the hot australian?
| seven : #wehatesunwoo
| eight : sorry greg
| nine : (jake)
| ten : prada withdrawls
| eleven : oh fuck
| twelve : bunya
| thirteen : jakey jakey eggs and bacey
| fourteen : MAN FUCK SONG KANG!
| fifteen : bunch of make belief
| sixteen : don’t yuck my yum
| seventeen : and a pea car was cheaper?
| eighteen : my little werewolf🥺
| nineteen : FUCKING PEA GIRL?
| twenty : #streamsforever
| twenty one : MROWWWWWW😻🐱🐈⬛
| twenty two : 𝓯𝓻𝓮𝓪𝓴
| twenty three : telling me to die isn’t very sigma
tba
@ SINCERELYRKI all rights reserved. 2024.
#sincerelyrki#[ 𐙚 ] MINI SKIRT!#jake sim smau#kpop smau#enhypen smau#jake smau#sim jake smau#enha smau#sim jake x reader#jake social media au#jake soft hours#jake socmed au#enhypen social media au#enhypen social au#enhypen socmed au#kpop social media au#kpop socmed#sim jaeyun#jaeyun smau#jaeyun fluff#jake fluff#jake sim fluff#enhypen fluff#kpop fluff#sim jake fluff#enhypen scenarios#jake sim x fem reader#jake sim series#jake sim x reader#jake sim
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