#for the record: i love laura linney. i am deeply attracted to her and that gorgeous voice i would see her in any show ever

[broadwaydivastournament]

While it may be inaccurate to say Laura Linney is the Biggest Tony Loser of all time (Legendary Chita Rivera, for example, won just two of her ten nominations, and Kelli O'Hara won just one of her seven*) it's also not...inaccurate if you go solely by success rate, hers being, well, zero. With five nominations, she is among just seven performers in Tony history to be nominated that many times without winning. Three men (all of whom are now deceased) and four women. It's likely Laura Linney will return to the stage in the near future, get herself another nomination, and (if she loses) be Officially the Biggest Tony Loser of all time. A title unlikely to be challenged on the actress side as Dana Ivy (82) and Estelle Parsons (96) are both mostly retired, and Jan Maxwell, my beloved, is dead. Meanwhile, Laura Linney is still a spry sixty and MTC has her in there every few years anyway.

On the opposite side of the Tony scale, we have six-time Tony winner Audra McDonald, a record-breaker on several fronts. She has won more competitive acting awards than anyone else, including Angela Lansbury (whose sixth Tony was a Lifetime Achievement Award). She is also tied for most nominations alongside Chita Rivera and Julie Harris (both deceased), and will almost certainly hold the record in her own right soon enough. She is also the only performer to win in every eligible category**, and just one of five to have been nominated. At the young age of fifty-three, Audra will likely continue to break her own records in due time. And if we get that unlikely Gypsy revival...well.

Pictured (L to R): Laura Linney and Audra McDonald about to throw hands at the 2017 Tony Awards.

So, while Audra McDonald absolutely wrecks Laura Linney in our little tournament, let's take a look at who they were up against for each nomination.

Her latest two nominations have probably been the closest races. 2010 was, as you can see, Viola Davis's show. Even my beloved Jan Maxwell didn't stand a chance.

Pictured (L to R): Cynthia Nixton, Laura Linney, and Audra McDonald at the 83rd Drama League Awards, 2017

Audra's losses have been to Heather Headley (Aida, understandable), Christine Ebersole (I suppose, but I'd have gone Donna's LoveMusik...), Mary-Louise Parker (I get it, but I'd have actually gone Laura Linney's one-woman show), and Jodie Comer (deserved).

Pictured (L to R): Laura Linney and Audra McDonald, pre-feud, holding a sleeping puppy twenty years ago at Broadway Barks, 2004.

*And will probably have only won one out of eight after this next awards season passes...

**some might consider Lady Day at Emerson's Bar and Grill to be category fraud given the copious amounts of singing and music going on.

Broadway Divas Tournament: Round 2A

Laura Linney (1964) "LAURA LINNEY (Diana) Broadway credits include My Name is Lucy Barton (Tony nom. dir. Richard Eyre): The Little Foxes (Tony nom.) Time Stands Still (Tony nom.) and Sight Unseen (Tony nom.) all directed by Daniel Sullivan at MTC. Other credits include Les Liaisons Dangereauses, The Crucible (Tony nom.), Uncle Vanya, Hedda Gabler, Honour, Holiday, The Seagull, Beggars in the House of Plenty, Six Degrees of Separation. Television credits: "Armistead Maupin's Tales of the City," "Ozark" (SAG, Emmy nom), "The Big C" (Emmy, Golden Globe Awards), "John Adams" (SAG, Golden Globe, Emmy Awards), "Frasier" (Emmy Award), "Wild Iris" (Emmy Award), "The Laramie Project," "Tales of the City" trilogy. Film: Falling, The Dinner, Nocturnal Animals, Sully, Sympathy for Delicious, Morning, The Details, The Savages (Oscar nom), Kinsey (Oscar nom), You Can Count on Me (Oscar nom), The Other Man, City of Your Final Destination, The Squid and the Whale, Jindabyne, Love Actually, Mystic River, The Nanny Diaries, Breach, Man of the Year, The Hottest State, Driving Lessons, The Exorcism of Emily Rose, P.S., The Life of David Gale, The Mothman Prophecies, Maze, The House of Mirth, The Truman Show, Absolute Power, Primal Fear, Congo, Lorenzo's Oil, Dave. Training: The Julliard School, Brown University. Member: AEA, SAG." - Playbill bio from Summer, 1976, June 2023.

Audra McDonald (1970) "AUDRA MCDONALD (Suzanne Alexander) is honored to take part in Adrienne Kennedy's historic and long overdue Broadway debut. A board member of Covenant House International and co-founder of Black Theatre United, McDonald is a singer, actor, and activist who lives in New York with her amazing husband and children." - Playbill bio from Ohio State Murders, December 2022.

NEW PROPAGANDA AND MEDIA UNDER CUT: ALL POLLS HERE

"Do you ever think Laura Linney reads her playbill bio and cries? Does she dream of the day when she too will hold a Tony Award aloft in triumph, or has she resigned herself to being one of four actresses with the biggest fail rate and will one day hold the record outright? (Given that Estelle Parsons is in her nineties, Dana Ivey is in her eighties, and Jan Maxwell, my beloved, is dead?) Anyway, the point of this isn't to rub salt in the wound. Love you, Laura Linney."

"It's too mean to title this poll Biggest Tony Winner vs. Biggest Tony Loser but it's pretty damn accurate, and given the overwhelming whiteness of award shows overall, it's damn satisfying that the Black woman is the one with a record-breaking Tonys on her shelf and the white blonde woman is not (no matter how talented she is). Audra McDonald, my beloved, you're going to sweep this entire tournament."