#for one it's not complete nonsense where you have to randomly click everything

[flash-from-the-past]

Panda's BIG Adventure

[makeste]

BnHA Chapter 287: Family Reunion

Previously on BnHA: The Tomura For One VS Deku And Pals clusterfuck reached new levels of clustfuckery as AFO possessed Tomura’s body and stabbed Kacchan and Endeavor. Shouto was all “good thing I leveled up offscreen so as to be able to fly around whilst carrying 400lbs worth of people”, and did just that and it was like, damn, son. Meanwhile Deku’s rage went Mach 100, and he kicked Tomura’s ass for almost two whole seconds, but in the process he apparently forgot that IF TOMURA TOUCHES HIM THAT IS VERY BAD, and so he stupidly let Tomura touch him and Tomura was all “GAME, SET.” Fortunately for Deku, his quirk plays by its own rules, and so the chapter ended with us cutting to the METAPHYSICAL OFA/AFO PARANORMAL DREAMSCAPE OF MYSTICAL BULLSHIT, where AFO!Vestige was all “lol Tomura y u mad”, and Nana!Vestige was all “SUP DEKU, YOU’RE JUST IN TIME, LOOKS LIKE IT’S ASSKICKING O’CLOCK.” I’m paraphrasing a bit, but that’s more or less the gist of it.

Today on BnHA: AFO is all “well if it isn’t Tomura’s grandmother who I murdered that one time”, and Deku is all “?”, and AFO is all “fucking vestiges, man, wild”, and Deku is all “??”, and AFO is all “ANYWAYS GETTIM TOMURA”, and OFA is all “NOT SO FAST”, and Deku is all “???”, and really, same. AFO then goes off on some wild tangent about how Deku is unworthy because he couldn’t protect everyone and needed help from OFA and got mad about his friends being stabbed, which is such a cold take it gave me hypothermia, but it ends up not mattering since Deku and Tomura both wake up seconds later with OFA still in the possession of its rightful owner, HOW ABOUT THAT. The chapter ends with the LoV approaching on Gigantomachia’s back with Dabi practically salivating at the mouth, and Toga trying to reignite an old fandom blood feud. Toga why would you do this to me. Toga.

YESSSSSSSSSSSSS

[CROWD LOSING THEIR MINDS] FINALLY THE NANA HAS COME BACK TO BNHA!! IF YA SMELLLLL WHAT THE NANA IS COOKIN!!!!! [RINGSIDE BELL CHIMING WILDLY] [LOUD AIRHORN NOISES]

“chapter 287: mistake” omg. yeah I’ll say you made a mistake, AFO. I HOPE YOU ENJOY THESE FLEETING LAST MOMENTS OF YOUR SHITTY EVIL LIFE

(ETA: so in all seriousness this must be referring to AFO’s belief that All Might/OFA made a mistake in choosing Deku, right? “I can’t believe you went and chose this shounen manga protagonist as your champion, what were you thinking.” I’ll just put this out there: however many comic books AFO read as a child, it clearly was not enough.)

wow Deku how slow are you

yes you’re inside OFA you dimbulb, did you think your clothes suddenly vanished out of the blue and the ghost of Nana just randomly appeared in the real world by some freak coincidence?? can you believe this kid. breaks his arms a measly 10-15 times in a row and all of a sudden he can’t think straight, get it together Deku

but also brb having a moment at the fact that his thoughts immediately run back to Kacchan, even with all of this nonsense going on and Nana about to lay the beatdown on AFO’s potato-lookin’ ass. forget that noise, all he wants to know is whether or not Kacchan is all right. fuckin’ geez. AM I OVERREACTING HERE A BIT. probably

(ETA: ALSO!! the way he just trails off!! “Kacchan is...” and then he can’t bring himself to complete the thought. oh my god my heart.)

HOLY SHIT

okay,

damn but this man sure knows how to ruffle my feathers. as eminently detestable as ever!!

could it be any clearer here that AFO is not on Tomura’s side?? for a moment I thought he had actually grabbed him by the back of the head in order to get him to look. but nope, he’s just resting his pointing hand on top of his head instead while he’s all “HEY TOMURA LOL IT’S THE GHOST OF YOUR DEAD PATHETIC GRANDMA”

for those keeping track at home, this would be the first time that Deku has heard this information -- that Tomura is Nana’s grandson -- and possibly the first time Vestige!Nana has heard it as well. Nana died when Kotarou was still a child, so for all we know the Vestige!Nana didn’t even know she had a grandson, lol. TODAY ON “MAKESTE RANTS AT LENGTH ABOUT THINGS THAT WILL PROBABLY BE ADDRESSED WITHIN THE NEXT THREE PANELS”, anyway moving on

lmao for the record I fucking LOLed at this giant question mark immediately bubbling up over Deku’s head

no idea what AFO is about to ramble on about now, haven’t read that far yet. but let the record show that Deku’s immediate reaction to hearing “BTW NANA IS YOUR ARCHNEMESIS’S GRANDMA LULZ” is everything I could have hoped for

(ETA: fandom nailed the shit out of this one with the confused Mr. Krabs meme lmao.)

okay so now AFO is monologuing at length about how he would sometimes have “riveting dreams” about the previous owners of all the quirks he stole. but once he gave the quirks away they stopped bothering him?? holy moly let me just take all the notes

okay so he’s saying that Vestiges are created whenever someone has their quirk stolen by AFO. but if they then disappear when he gives the quirks away, does that also mean that whoever receives the quirks also gets the original owner’s Vestige bundled in every time?? that would be wild okay hold up let me read the rest of this

so he’s saying that the Vestiges are actually the “consciousnesses” of the original quirk owners, which have become embedded in their dna or something. SOUNDS INCREDIBLY DUBIOUS TO ME LOL but on the other hand this is a world where children can be born with airplane heads, so my disbelief can hardly afford to pick and choose what it’s gonna be suspended at! anyways though, how does he know he’s the only one who was able to converse with them? did you conduct detailed six-month follow-up interviews with everyone you gave quirks to or what

and if it really is the case that this ability was formerly exclusive to him, isn’t that more evidence than ever that OFA and AFO are actually THE EXACT SAME QUIRK oh whoops am I getting ahead of myself again, sorry

MEANWHILE TOMURA IS ALL, “GRANDMA?”

“WHY AM I HERE, WELL LET ME TELL YOU A STORY, GRANDSON. YOU SEE THAT MAN GROWING OUT OF YOUR RIBCAGE THERE? WELL IT’S JUST THE FUNNIEST THING, ACTUALLY”

WAIT SO IS HE SAYING THEY’RE SOULS OR NOT??

this makes it sound like they won’t ever get to rest, which sure sounds like a soul thing to me. well whatever, soul, consciousness, I guess it’s just semantics at the end of the day

anyways though, so this asshole is finally done talking (I’m sure that won’t last), so now we can finally have the heartwarming reunion we’ve all been waiting for

sigh

-- actually, no, not “sigh”!! you know what!! because Tomura says “whatever the reason”, but that’s only because he doesn’t actually have a fucking clue about the reason. like, I don’t know if the knowledge that AFO killed Nana would be enough to give him pause, but if he knew the whole story and knew that AFO was behind not only Nana’s death, but the rest of his family’s deaths as well... now that would be a whole different thing

anyway. but at least it’s becoming clearer now why AFO spent all that time raising Tomura up as his heir and brainwashing him even though he seems to have been planning this body takeover the whole time. it’s all because he loves making people miserable! yaaaaay

btw HAS NANA HAD THE EXACT SAME MOLE ON HER CHIN AS TOMURA THIS ENTIRE TIME WTF. am I just the least observant person who ever lived lmao

lol wtf

ground: [randomly starts exploding]

Deku: “ONE FOR ALL IS BEING ERODED!!!” LOL IS THAT WHAT’S HAPPENING HERE, OKAY THEN. I’ll take your word for it

y’all I cannot fucking get over this “AFO growing out of Tomura’s hip socket like a fucked-up ventriloquist dummy” shit though

you do realize that absolutely no one can take you seriously right now, right?? it’s important to me that you know this

WHAT’S THIS NOW

seems like SOMEONE has had it up to here with a certain SOMEONE ELSE’S bullshit lmaooo bye Felicia

I SAID GOOD DAY!!

you guys why is he not dying!!

-- OH DAMN

love how Deku is just lying there like “YOU KNOW THOSE DAYS WHERE YOU’RE LIKE, THIS MIGHT AS WELL HAPPEN.” poor Deku

(ETA: where in god’s name is OFA Prime standing. why are my thoughts fully consumed by this lmao.)

are Nana and OFA Prime even doing anything?? why are they sticking their arms out like that. wait hold up is this all a big metaphor for the back-and-forth going on between Tomura trying to steal OFA and OFA being all “actually no you can’t, please enter your password and click on all the boxes with bicycles in them to prove you’re a human first”?

OH SNAP OFA PRIME SAID NO THANKS

“SORRY BRO WE’VE ALREADY MADE OURSELVES AT HOME HERE”

I have only just noticed that metaphysical!Deku has the same scars as actual!Deku. and yet his arms are not currently broken! that doesn’t really seem consistent to me but whatever!! maybe he saved right before the boss battle, that would be smart of him

anyway, that’s great and all that OFA Prime is here helping out, but I really wanted to see Nana fight AFO in a one on one though so I’m a bit disappointed. also why is it only the two of them?? where are Banjou and the others. of all the times to be sleeping on the job

FOR FUCK’S SAKE, THIS MAN

WOULD YOU STOP. WOULD YOU JUST QUIT IT ALREADY

oh shit hold up

doesn’t this confirm that the reason he wanted to transfer his power to Tomura is because he believed it would make him strong enough to finally take OFA because of Quirk Singularity? jesus christ. and here he was so sure of himself. but it turns out he doesn’t actually know shit! you can’t just fucking take OFA like that ya dingdong that’s not how it works

(ETA: SO, A THOUGHT -- is there any sort of subtle hinting here in the way that he words this? “if your strength is combined with mine”, as opposed to “if my strength is combined with yours”? no idea if the admittedly-so-small-as-to-be-almost-inconsequential distinction between those two sentences exists in the original Japanese or not, but I find it very interesting that the English wording implies that he’s the one adding Tomura’s strength to his own, rather than vice versa.)

now he’s insulting Deku!!

excuse me sir WHO ASKED YOU anyway. and never mind that being consumed by an, AND I QUOTE, “unquenchable” rage is your protege’s whole THING, and that he also needed your help to avoid being burned to a crisp a short while ago. where do you get off I swear

(ETA: also just want to point out that in the panel before this one he says that he’s been “watching through Tomura”, which pretty much confirms that his consciousness or whatever is alive inside of him all the time. Tomura is definitely not getting rid of this guy any time soon.)

WOW

first he calls Kacchan useless, then he calls Deku a simpleton, and don’t even get me started with Nana. just, you guys. this man is just... a very, very rude man

NOW OFA IS ALL “THAT’S EXACTLY WHAT MAKES HIM SUCH A GOOD PROTAGNIST YOU BUTTMUNCH” AND OMG PREACH

“DESPITE HIS COMMON SENSE” sdfkllk my man he already has one brother roasting him, take it easy guy

AHH WHAT

IS THIS BACK IN THE REAL WORLD

YEP

hahaha nice try Tomura

so Deku’s all “I didn’t lose my power! BUT” and I assume the “but” is the part where his arms are still broken and shit, and meanwhile Tomura’s body is almost healed up now finally

they’re both wiped out and now AFO is again petitioning Tomura to let him take over goddammit

“you won’t lose your mind” yep, he sure won’t! scout’s honor!! pinky swear!!

meanwhile Deku is getting fucking desperate flkjl;k my baby. and Machia is going to show up any second now too, probably. what else can fucking go wrong at this point

oh shit I shouldn’t have asked

get ready to rrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrruuuumble, probably

OH MY GOD

WELL AT LEAST SOMEONE HERE IS HAVING A GOOD TIME. jesus

so as soon as he heard Endeavor was there he got all, “TIME FOR THE BIG REVEAL”, is that right? WELL JOKE’S ON YOU TOUYA, YOUR DAD DOESN’T SEEM ALL THAT CONSCIOUS AT THE MOMENT, SO THAT’S GOING TO DRAIN A LOT OF THE TENSION FROM THE SCENE WHEN YOU GO ALL REVERSE DARTH VADER ON HIM AND HE’S ALL “ZZZZZZZZ”

meanwhile Toga is having unsettlingly quiet angst

jesus christ Toga this is all we need right now

“WAS JIN-KUN NOT A PERSON” sdkfjlk Horikoshi I swear. please have mercy on this fandom. this is the debate that refuses to die!!

but seriously ffs, the issue isn’t that Jin deserved to die, it’s that the countless people whom Jin would have either directly or indirectly killed didn’t deserve to die either. people don’t only become people when you attach names and faces to them! we all loved Jin because we’d gotten to know him, but that doesn’t mean his life was inherently worth more than the lives of all the people he would have killed. sometimes there’s just no good answer

like, it’s just crazy to me that because the heroes are all “we want to protect everyone!” but then aren’t always able to do so because that’s literally impossible, whereas the villains are all “we don’t care about anyone other than the select few people that we actually like!”, the villains somehow wind up getting the better PR. it just so happens that it’s infinitely easier to be loyal to the interests of a few people as opposed to ALL THE PEOPLE. like, no shit, it’s easier to stick to your moral code when you barely have a moral code. and so the villains can kill thousands and no one bats an eye, but if a hero fails to save even one person they’re hypocritical moral failures. like what the hell

BUT ANYWAY, sorry to go off on a tangent there lol, it’s not really a big deal. I’m just preemptively trying to stave off more discourse about it lol but who am I even kidding

anyways lol, but of course they won’t kill you unless they have no choice, Toga. but when it comes to catch-22 situations, it’s a bit much to infer that the heroes don’t consider the villains people just because they opt for the choice that spares more innocent lives. I sure as hell don’t want my babies out here killing people, but to say that they can’t no matter what or else they’re no different from the villains is just...

anyway so the chapter has now just ENDED, just like that!! on a shot of Ochako’s face!

I SENSE ANOTHER THROWDOWN COMING. and it had better not be a total letdown like the last one! NANA BARELY DID ANYTHING HORIKOSHI, WHAT THE FUCK. I started out with such high hopes lol

but I will settle for Toga VS Ochako, and Deku VS Tomura: The Sequel: Shouto’s Revenge! SPEAKING OF HEROES WHO HAVE NO QUALMS ABOUT MURDERING PEOPLE lmao

[timextoxhajima]

Playlist Feels

Member: lee jaehyun aka hyunjae from tbz cause i feel like there are too many jaehyuns around now ;_; my heart can’t take too many perfect men of the same name

Genre: COLLEGE... CRUSH? idk this is probably gonna be my most crack piece (you can already tell by the track)

Word Count: 4.3k

A/N: I wrote this at like 1.30am so please bear with me lol my inspiration always come in the middle of the night because it’s so quiet and conducive 

this will be a one shot cause i’ve got no fucking clue how to make it into a series/short novel without an actual conflict/angst/drama involved :”) if you’re a writer and you see this and you want to make a 2nd part or something, BE MY GUEST

lee hyun jae. 

who was he to me?

oh, i don’t know.

just the prettiest but handsomest man alive. if that’s even a word. 

he’s always surrounded by like, eleven other boys who are also good-looking and talented in some way or another. 

god must’ve invested his entire life into crafting these fine, fine specimens of men to be placed on earth.

maybe there was a mix up somewhere and they were supposed to be angels or demi-gods and god just fucked up. 

but i’ve got no complaints. 

i’m satisfied that i get to feast my eyes on such a gorgeous, rare, one-of-a-kind version of a person i’m sure exists nowhere else in the world. 

he’s known for being one of the most caring ones of the group. he’d make his friends laugh but watch out for them at the same time. he’s so easygoing, i wonder if he’d smile at me if i tripped him over or something. 

you might think i’m exaggerating. 

well,

i’m not.

so who am i to him?

sadly, nobody.

harsh truth.

there was absolutely nothing wrong with the man. there was a lack of flaw, and that was literally the only flaw he had. if it could even be considered as a flaw. i could spend my seconds, minutes, hours, days, just staring at him. it was so unfair that there is NOTHING WRONG WITH HIM.

sometimes it pisses me off.

it kind of pisses me off that he doesn’t have a girlfriend despite half the school simping over him.

i mean, who wouldn’t? just look at him.

there have been rumors flying about that he was gay or something. 

doesn’t matter if he is gay though.

it simply hurts to know he’s not dating anybody.

it’ll be such a waste if such a man ends up living a life alone. a waste indeed.

so what was it that was stopping me from putting that destiny of his to a screeching stop?

well, there was just one problem. 

“hELLO, earth to y/n?” the sudden waving in your face with the heaviest textbook in your curriculum snaps you back into reality. 

“which one of the twelve are you thinking up some magical fantasy over now?” your best friend frowns at you, the vein on her arm popping from the weight of the fat textbook. 

“ah-- it doesn’t matter who i’m daydreaming about, let me have my moment, would you?” you lean back in your seat, disgruntled at her telling you what not to do with your own imagination. sometimes it was difficult to look at her without seeing all the little hints of lee hyunjae in her.

they had the same nose, but that was it. honestly, it was a miracle you just happened to make friends with one of the prettiest girls in school, and good for you, she ended up becoming your friend and stayed in that position for more than a decade. naturally, she was upgraded to the ‘best friend’ title. 

the biggest issue you had with lee hee jae was that she hated her brother getting so much attention, and she has always condemned him about it. 

which was pretty ironic, given the number of love letters that show up in her locker everyday.

but thanks to her cold, a-little-more-than-mean superficial personality, most guys don’t have enough of a pair to talk to her in person. sure, she won’t hesitate to stab a bitch, but you knew her well enough to know that if the love of her life, son young jae, were to suddenly sprout feelings for her and confess, she might just nose bleed and pass out. 

but does she know you have had the biggest, fattest crush on her older brother?

no. 

she’d kidnap you and torture you and brainwash you to unlike him. 

maybe that’s why he hasn’t got any girlfriends.

“you’re zoning out again,” she snaps her finger in your ear and the sharp click jumps you. you bare your teeth in annoyance and feign a hit towards her, but she doesn’t flinch. 

your little high school crush on her brother wasn’t getting any weaker as the years went by. in fact, it’s been getting stronger. now that you’ve seen the way he treats his friends, how kind and considerate he was, not to mention that body-- well--

let’s just say you went from just appreciating his face, to everything in general. it was only a matter of time before she finds out that the one man you were simping over out of the eleven boys was her brother.

of the eleven boys, it just had to be her brother.

“hee jae,” you pull out a pencil and start to randomly doodle in your notebook. “haven’t you ever considered talking to eric?” 

she shoots you a death glare, but you’re used to it. 

“i thought we agreed not to speak of this in school!” she leans into you and hisses, eyes piercing right through your head. if her eyes had lazers, your head would’ve been blasted off completely after years of her angry glaring. 

“no, but eric just seems so... chill, y’know? he’s either cleaning his table and packing his stuff or outside playing baseball, there’s literally nothing stopping you from talking to him.”

she rolls her eyes and snatches your pencil away from you in a bid to piss you off so you’d stop talking.

“give it back--” you snatch the stationery from her and hiss at her like a cat. “you’re literally in the damn baseball team with him. it’s not that difficult to make up a story and start a conversation with him.”

“ha,” she’s finally mastered the art of fake laughter. “easy for you to say. you simp for all eleven of them and can’t choose one for you to worry about it like i do.”

that was fun to hear.

“well, forget eric,” she waves it off. “are we doing anything after school?”

anything but going to your house. i don’t want to be stuck under the same roof as your brother, my heart would get a seizure and i’ll probably die on the spot.

“my mom’s making crepes today, and i know you love that shit,” hee jae snickers, pulling out a baseball from her bag and throwing it into the air and catching it. 

“aw, man... not the crepes,” you pout and side eye her, leaning back into your seat. 

“why are you so uptight about going to my place? you’ve been there a billion fucking times, you literally live there now.”

that’s cause i’m only over when your brother isn’t around!

“ugh, okay fine. but i gotta dash home first to grab some homework. i left some of it at home ‘cause i wasn’t expecting an invitation today.”

she squeals, showing you a part of her that nobody else has the privilege of seeing. “sick,” she gets out of the seat she dragged to yours and brings it back to where she took it from. “call my home number and tell me you’re on your way before you leave your house!”

you nod un-enthusiastically, waving her off before she leaves the classroom and returns to hers. 

you were finally back at home, showered and changed into comfortable clothes while you shoved all your homework into your bag. you leave your parents a text to tell them that you’d spend the afternoon and evening at heejae’s so they don’t have to worry about your dinner, then you dial her home number.

the phone was on it’s eighth ring, and you were already one foot out of the door. usually, it doesn’t take her that long to pick up the phone.

“this little bitch invites me over and doesn’t pick up the damn--”

“hello?”

your grip tightens around your phone and you stumble out of your house, the door swinging shut behind jumps you and you process the voice on the other end of the line. 

“uh--”

“is this y/n?”

“uh... yeah, this is she.”

he knows me?

shut up, of course he knows you. you’ve been friends with his sister for a decade!

“oh, okay, cool. heejae’s in the toilet right now and she said she’ll get it but i couldn’t stand the sound of the phone ringing.”

“ah...” your voice trails off, unsure of how to respond. you were just preoccupied with how soothing his voice was, and just imagining his face with the phone to his ear on the other line was just so--

“hello? y/n? you there?”

“yeah, yeah, sorry i was... crossing a road.” you weren’t even moving; you were just planted into the pavement like a tree. 

“actually, why don’t i go and pick you up? your place is on the way to the shopping mall and my mom just told me to go get some groceries, do you want to tag along? we can head back to my place afterwards and you can get the crepes you like.”

where in the world was he getting all this information from?

“uh--” you stammer into the receiver for the billionth time. he must think you have some kind of speech problem by now.

“you know what? just hang tight for a few minutes. heejae’s still in the bathroom so she doesn’t get a say in what i do if i decide it without her presence,” you hear him walk around on the house and call out for his mom to tell her he was leaving for the shopping mall. “you live on 31st avenue, right? the white house with the blue roof?”

“uH--” you really need to get a grip on yourself.

“i guessed. hang tight, i’ll be there in a sec! see you!”

hyunjae doesn’t bother to wait for you to hang up before he does. the line goes dead and the beep nearly deafens you, but you couldn’t believe your ears. you were about to be in the same vehicle as lee hyun jae. one of the most popular boys in school, the handsomest man alive, the love of your li--

whoa.

too fast.

you shake the nonsensical daydreams out of your head and walk back to the steps of your door. while waiting, you can’t help but to let the quiet crush on him run your mind recklessly. 

what if he was just messing with you and he’s just chilling at home? what if he knows that you have a crush on him and he’s just having fun? what if he thinks you’re weird for hanging out with his sister? what if he’s caught you staring and he thinks you’re a creep? oh my god, what if heejae’s told him embarrassing stories about you and now he’s going to poke fun at you with that? 

you stare blankly at the little weeds in the cracks of the pavement, the thoughts in your head running wild as you slowly convince yourself he’s not going to turn up. 

but the familiar silver family car rolls up at the end of the pavement, and the windows roll down to reveal hyunjae in sunglasses wearing a simple white tee-shirt. 

“did i keep you waiting?” he pushes down his sunglasses and looks at you over the rim, one arm dangling outside the window. 

you shake your head, suddenly losing all ability to speak. 

“alrighty then, get in. we’re heading for the shopping mall.” he nods his head towards the car, retracting his arm back into the vehicle. 

your heart was thumping so aggressively and so loudly you were sure he could hear it. hell, he could probably see it. 

“how’s school? i haven’t seen you around back in my house after... what, about five years? you were always around when i was out, if i didn’t know better, i’d think you were avoiding me,” his voice was so alluring, you had to constantly remind yourself that he was actually saying something.

“uh-- well....” 

come on, say something. anything.

“i guess god just doesn’t want us to meet.”

no, it’s because you were avoiding him. what the flying fuck was that?

he laughs heartily, his teeth catching the light of the afternoon sun and glistens in your vision. “if that’s the case then god really needs to give me a break.”

your little-crush-on-him morphs into a tiny character in your head and it starts yelling at you. did he just say what you think he just said?

“no, i mean,” he glances at you, hands still on the steering wheel once he notices you’ve gone eerily silent. “i would’ve spoken to you and tried to be actual friends with you sooner, but heejae never wants me talking to her friends. you can imagine how she is with her best friend.”

you sigh heavily, the mention of your best friends’ name loosening some knots in your stomach. “lee hee jae is just something. not sure what, but something.”

“it does baffle me to think about how you put up with her for what, nine years now?”

you were looking out the window, and the idea of being in the same car as hyunjae doesn’t seem as tormenting as it seemed once you realise the best support you’ve had for the last ten years was lee hee jae. 

“eleven, actually,” you say without looking at him, eyes zeroing on a couple walking a dog on the pavement by the road. “yeah i guess she can be a handful sometimes, especially with how cold and mean she is on the outside...”

the car stops at a traffic junction.

“but put her in front of one guy and she’ll pass the fu--”

“‘one guy’?” he interrupts.

your eyes widen and you suck your lips between your teeth, wincing a little to yourself when you realise what you just said. 

“lee hee jae has a crush on someone?” you hear him scoff and a brotherly chuckle rushes out his lips. “do you know who it is?”

you were about to protest and stop him from trying to dig the information that you nearly disclosed, but he interrupts you again.

“y’know what? don’t tell me. i’ll guess. i’ll just watch your reactions while i’m at it.”

you grit your teeth and tighten your temples. you don’t realise how sweaty your palms were until your phone slides out from underneath your skin when the car starts to move. 

“is it kevin? no wait-- doesn’t feel like it.”

is he going to just start talking on his own until he finds someone he thinks suits her and then look at my face to read my expression?

“i don’t think she’s the kind to go for someone older than me or my age. so that takes sangyeon, jacob, younghoon-- is it younghoon? no, it’s not... ah, no matter how i think about it, someone nearer your age pops up. haknyeon, sunwoo, eric. it’s one of the three.”

that wasn’t so hard. hee jae must be easy for her brother to read.

“are you really going to let me play this elimination game alone?” he raises a brow and turns the wheel, driving into the car park of the shopping mall. the little gesture causes your heart to involuntarily skip a beat, and you could see his eyes folding even behind the sunglasses when he turns his head.

“your sister would kill me if she knew i even started this conversation, so i’m just refraining from deepening my grave.”

you hear him laugh through his nose. “relax, i’m not going to tell her you said this. i’ve seen the way she looks at us whenever we’re in school. she gives me a look of disgust but she always reserves a blush on her cheeks for someone. i just can’t put my finger on who it is.”

“you mean you notice the way she looks at you and your friends? that’s a little weird.”

the car starts to reverse into a parking lot and he pulls the gears into parking mode. there was a short silence in the air as he lays his finger on the start up button of the car and he turns to look at you, now without the sunglasses to block your view of his eyes.

“you’d be surprised that i notice a lot of things.”

he flashes you a smile and reaches for the door on his side, pushing himself out as if he didn’t just expose both you and your best friend. 

you were just tailing hyunjae while he told you what was on the grocery list, and you start filling the basket. he doesn’t stop guessing though, but the entire time spent with him only made you feel like he was so comfortable to be around.

besides his pretty face, of course. 

you were waiting for him to pay for the items while you stood outside when heejae’s caller ID showed up on your phone screen.

“where the hell are you?”

“hello to you too,” you roll your eyes. “your brother said he was going to get me and now we’re shopping for groceries before we return to your place. didn’t your mom tell you?”

“what? no, she didn’t. she just told me he went out to get groceries.”

“huh?” you look over your shoulder to see hyunjae paying the cashier. “are you saying that your mom lied about me?”

“now, why would she do that?”

“she’s your mom, not mine. why don’t you ask her instead?” 

hyunjae picks up the grocery bags and walks towards you, looking into them and making sure he didn’t miss out anything. 

“this is so fucking weird. where’s hyunjae? pass the phone to him,”

“we’re done, let’s go.” hyunjae stops by your side, noticing that you were on the phone. 

“don’t you dare hang up on me, pass the phone to him!” hee jae screams into the receiver. you wince and pull it away from your ear, shooting hyunjae a look of slight confusion as you hand him the phone. 

“it’s your sister.”

he sighs and places the bags on the floor, wiping his hands on his pants before taking it. 

you could hear hee jae screaming at him on the other end, but hyunjae’s face doesn’t change one bit besides that sweet smile plastered to his lips while he let his sister berate him. hyunjae got bored extremely quickly, and he was already removing the phone from his ear while he repeated the word ‘bye’ into the receiver. 

he hands the phone back to you and hangs it up for you, picking up the bags and heading back to the car. 

by the time you reach the road right outside their house, heejae was standing on the porch, anxiously tapping her foot on the wooden boards. 

“oh, no,” he groans, looking out the window and observing heejae like she was a lion in the savannah. “well, just another day for us people who have to deal with miss lee.”

he says so coyly, pushing himself out of the car and going to open the door of the backseat. you help yourself out, and heejae storms toward you, fists balled by her side and steam coming out through her ears.

you thought she was going to scream at you for accepting a ride from hyunjae, but she dodges you and opens the backseat door opposite hyunjae to yell at him in the car. 

“what made you think it was a great idea to pick her up? didn’t we have a deal that both our friends were out of bounds to each other?”

wait what--

“yah, lee hyunjae!” she yells at the top of her voice as he ignores her, pulling out of the car and walking towards the house. “we had a deeeeeaaaaaaal!” 

you grab onto heejae and turn her around, trying to peel her attention away from her brother and to you so you could get a grasp on what she just said.

“did you just say what i think you just said?!” you blink in surprise at her, and the thought of hyunjae finding an excuse just to spend time with you melts you into a puddle of hopeless goop. 

“no,” she says with a stern face, lifting a finger and pointing at you in the face. “no.”

“well--” she yanks herself out of your grip and turns to the house. “what’s so bad about dating your siblings’ friends? you like eric.”

she literally screeches to a stop and turns around with eyes that were burning. honestly, it was pretty funny to see her so riled up, knowing that she wasn’t angry at you. she was angry with hyunjae for... whatever he did, and the fact that she just had to fall for someone in hyunjae’s circle of friends. it was a slap in her face, or whoever thought about the no-dating-siblings’-friends pact.

“is that why you don’t want to talk to eric? because of this... deal?” you raise a brow, entertained, completely forgetting that there was the slightest chance that hyunjae might’ve been looking for an excuse to hang out with you, and he had just succeeded.

she had no words, but her silence was enough to let you unpack the situation.

“ah... i see,” you fold your arms across your chest and smirk at her. then you remember you were standing right outside lee hyunjae’s house. this was your chance to dig the information out from her. “so if this deal is stopping you from talking to eric, then is it safe to assume that it’s similar for hyunjae?”

you could see her bottom lip quivering upon your question, as she realises that you’ve finally found out why she was keeping a distance from her own teammate. but her silence also pushes you further into confusion. does that mean--

“look, you can’t date hyunjae, okay? i forbid it. the last time a girl dated someone in that group of friends of his, they broke up because she got bullied by other girls in school. i told hyunjae he wasn’t allowed to date any of my friends so i wouldn’t need to beat the fuck out of any bullies and get myself expelled,” she huffed and hugged her torso. “and i made him agree to that deal by promising him that neither i nor any of my friends would date his.”

you shake your head, fingers pressing into your temples and hair while you let the story unfold from her narration. 

“my mom didn’t tell me about him going to get you because... well... he--”

“i like you!”

your heart stops and you think your blood stopped flowing through you as well. heejae’s head snaps back to look at the house and the source of noise, and she pulls out a shoe to hurl it at hyunjae. 

“ah--!” he starts yelling once she reaches him with the shoe. “let me at least try, god damn it! sunwoo only let his girlfriend get bullied because he’s a dumbass-- ow! but i’m not gonna let her get bullied, i promise!”

you slowly turn your head to see hyunjae trying to dodge every hit, and he starts running away from her and toward you. he pulls you in front of him so you were standing between him and heejae, who was holding onto the shoe so tightly, her knuckles were turning white. 

“y/n, take a chance with me, would you? i’ve always noticed the both of you looking at us but it always bothered me that i have no idea who either of you are looking at--”

he dodges a side swing, and your view of heejae trying to reach him was pretty hilarious, if you weren’t acting as his shield. 

“what makes you think she’ll say yes?! she can’t even choose--”

“i do, heejae,” finally, you’ve decided to shoot your shot. heejae freezes with the shoe in mid-air, and hyunjae’s hold on your shoulders tighten. “i’ve only said i can’t choose only because i didn’t want you to know that it was your brother i liked.”

you couldn’t believe what was coming out of your mouth. all that effort to keep it hidden only to expose yourself infront of both heejae and her brother at once?!

she looked like she wanted to slap you with the shoe now, and you flinch when she shifts, closing your eyes to brace for impact. 

but it doesn’t come. 

you open one eye and look at her, and she looked like she’s completely resigned to fate. she shakes her head like your mother would when you did something stupid, and she squats to get her shoe back on her feet. 

“i give up,” she grunts, shoving her feet into her shoe and tying the laces messily before standing up again. “of all eleven of them, him?” she raises an agitated brow and points to the boy hiding behind you. 

“it wouldn’t have been so annoying if it had been one of his friends, but him?!” 

you turn back to look at hyunjae, who was giving you puppy eyes as if he was already your boyf--

too fast. 

“does it look like i chose to like him?” you pout, hands reaching out to her and trying to play for affection. 

“for fucks’ sake,” she groans, face palming herself. “now i’m going to look like a shitty friend and sister if i don’t let you two date.”

“on the bright side..” you pull her into a hug and tighten your hold, knowing that whatever you were going to say next was going to warrant another violent outburst from her. “if hyunjae and i date, that means the deal’s broken and...”

“you can talk to eric now.”

“AH! SO IT’S ERIC?!”

[buckleyirondad]

10. They Look So Pretty When They Bleed “Internal Bleeding” 

Peter falls off the lakehouse roof while helping Tony with household chores.

AO3 Link

Families across the world, spent their day-to-day lives, doing normal people things, and sometimes, they’d have exciting events to look forward to.

Tony’s life was the opposite.

Since beating Thanos, and having Peter home safely, Tony spent the majority of the time, worrying about the kid being on patrol.

So, the days spent completing small tasks, such as fixing a hole in the lakehouse roof, were the times that he most looked forward to.

Peter wiped the back of his hand over his brow, “Wow.”

Tony placed his tool down, “You tired, kid?” He asked, looking up.

Peter sat down, “We’ve been up here, for an hour.”

Tony shrugged, “Well, we’re nearly done.”

Peter stretched his arms up, over his head, “Wouldn’t it have been easier, if we got one of the suits to do this?”

“Probably, but I promised Pepper…” He bent down, “When we moved in, that the suits would never help with little tasks.”

Peter ducked his head, mid-laugh, “They’re reserved only for, the end of the world tasks?”

“Basically,” He looked up, “Or, you know, keeping your kid alive on patrol?”

“How funny,” Peter rolled his eyes, letting out a snort, “So, you think she’s right?”

“Oh, yeah,” Tony nodded, “Definitely, I like fixing things.”

"May kinda does the same thing,” Peter said, “I’m not allowed to use my web-shooters to tidy my room anymore, or cover up pinholes, in the walls.”

Tony narrowed his eyes, “You didn’t—”

Peter grinned, unfazed, “I have.”

“Teenagers.”

“Okay…” He placed his hand, on the chimney behind him, and stood up, “I’m gonna head down.”

“I’ll join you,” Tony grabbed his toolbox, “In a few minutes.”

Peter hurried away, “I’m gonna eat the last brownie.”

Tony turned, shaking his head, “Traitor.”

He heard Peter carefully creeping over, to the edge of the roof, by the side of Morgan’s bedroom window, and he lowered himself down.

Tony started gathering his tools together.

He heard a large bang, followed by a sharp intake of breath, and then, a spine-chilling thud.

He snapped his head up, “Peter?”

A pained sigh followed.

“Fuck,” He scrambled away, towards the edge where the ladder was placed, “Peter!”

Peter was sprawled across the grass below, nursing his head, in his hand.

“Pete…” Tony sped down the ladder, and rushed to his side, kneeling, “Hey, hey, you okay?”

“Yeah…” Peter squeaked, “Wow.” He blinked slowly, “That was dramatic.”

Tony rested a hand on his arm, ��This wouldn’t happen if you used the ladder.”

“It’s not that far down,” Peter held up his hand, articulating his nonsense point, “And I’m Spider-Man.”

“Well, Spider-Man….” He leaned back, tapping Peter’s foot, “Maybe, check your laces, before climbing off a roof.”

“Yeah,” He rubbed the side of his head, “Good plan.”

Tony quickly tied the kid’s laces, and then, moved back, “Here,” He eased Peter, into a sitting position, “You can swing, building to building, but you didn’t notice, that your shoelaces, were undone?"

“I’m not always in Spider-Man mode.”

“Clearly,” Tony darted his eyes around, searching for injuries, “Yet, you use it as an excuse.”

Peter lifted his shoulder in a half shrug.

Tony nudged Peter’s shoulder, “Stop trying to give your old man a heart attack.”

Peter widened his eyes, “I’m not trying to.”

“You okay?” Tony laughed nervously, scanning him, “Any broken bones?”

“Nah,” Peter sighed, “I kinda fell butt first, and the grass was here, so I think I’m good.”

“You’re incredibly lucky.”

Peter barked a laugh, “It’s my middle name.”

“I don’t know…” Tony squeezed his shoulder, “Well, we’re done for the day, and you’re never going on the roof again.”

“God,” Peter groaned, “It was one time.”

Tony jumped up, “One time is enough,” He leaned, helping Peter to his feet.

Peter stood steady, “See, I’m fine.”

“You can probably thank your powers for that,” He nudged Peter’s arm, “Come on.”

They walked up the porch steps, and Tony clicked open the front door.

“Hey, you two,” Pepper was sitting, at the breakfast bar, with Morgan, “Everything good?”

Peter spoke quickly, “Yeah.”

Tony jumped it at the same time, “Peter fell off the roof.”

Peter glared, with his mouth set in a determined line.

Pepper jumped out of her chair, jogging over, “Wait, what?!”

Peter held up his hands, “I’m fine.”

Pepper pressed her hand on Peter’s cheek, “How—"

“My shoelace was undone,” Peter sighed, “I’m good, I’ve fallen further on patrol.”

“Still,” She brushed a curl behind his ear, “Please, be careful. I don’t want you going to May, in a sling…again.”

Tony chipped in, “He’s clumsy, by nature.”

Morgan shouted out, “But he’s Spider-Man!”

“Yes, he is, honey,” Tony jogged over, “However, for some reason, your brother, is clumsier when he doesn’t have a red and blue suit on.”

Morgan turned to her brother, “Then you should wear it, all the time, Petey.”

Peter skipped over, ruffling Morgan’s hair, “I would but it might give away my secret identity.”

“Oh, yeah,” Morgan reached out, taking the plate, with the final brownie on, “I saved you the last one.”

Peter took it, and shot an evil smirk in Tony’s direction, “Thank you.”

Tony crossed his arms and shook his head, disappointed, “I’ll never forget this.”

Peter giggled, as he shuffled over to the couch.

Tony sang, “What do we all fancy for dinner?”

Morgan shouted back, “Pizza!”

Tony turned, to Pepper, “Honey?”

She nodded, “Pizza sounds good.”

Tony skipped over, tapping the back of the couch, “Pete?”

Peter leaned his head back, mouthful, “Yeah?”

“Fancy pizza?”

“Um, yeah. The usual,” Peter spun around, “Please.”

***

They watched A New Hope and The Empire Strikes Back while eating their pizza, and then, Morgan pleaded with them, to put Frozen on.

Elsa was performing her killer solo when Tony started collecting the boxes together.

He reached for Peter’s box, “Oh,” He pushed it open, there was still about half left, “Hey Pete, you’ve still got pizza left.”

Peter shrugged, “I’m not that hungry.”

Tony perched on his seat, looking to Pepper, who seemingly shared his concern.

The kid could consume twice his weight, in sugars and fats, daily.

Pepper leaned over, “You sure, honey?”

“Yeah, it’s not that nice,” Peter waved his hand, “I think I ate too many brownies.”

Tony nodded, “Okay.”

Morgan jumped up randomly, “I’m gonna brush my teeth.”

Pepper spun to face her, “You can wait until the end of the movie, sweetheart.”

“Nah,” Morgan sped off, “I wanna do it now, so I can go to bed at the end.”

She charged upstairs.

Tony paused the movie, “She’s got tactics, that one.”

Pepper crossed her arms, “She gets it from you.”

Tony dropped his jaw, “She does not.”

“She does too,” Pepper looked up, “All for a later bedtime.”

Peter sat up straight, a pillow fell off the couch, to the floor, “Uh…”

Tony twirled to face him, “You ready for bed, kid?”

Peter looked at him, with glossed over eyes, but he said nothing, “Uh..” He looked beside him, “Where’d Morgan go?”

Pepper sat up, startled, “She’s gone to brush her teeth.”

Tony shuffled closer, “You feeling all right, Pete?”

“Yeah,” Peter rubbed his eyes, “Just tired.”

“Wanna go to bed?” Tony asked, “We won’t blame you.”

“Hm, I think I will go, yeah,” He slowly stood, but wobbled, unsteady on his feet, “Uh...”

“Okay—” Tony launched, catching him, “Let’s sit you, back down.” He gently lowered him back, into a sitting position, “Okay…” He knelt on the floor, keeping his hands rested on his shoulders.

“Peter—” Pepper rushed over, crouching beside the pair.

Tony studied him, “What hurts, kiddo?”

Peter moved his shaking hand, pointing to his chest.

Tony asked, “Can we look?”

“Yeah.”

Tony lifted Peter’s shirt, revealing a dark bruise, under his left ribcage, “Oh, shit…”

Pepper sighed heavily, “Honey…”

Tony brushed a hand through Peter’s curls, “Friday, can you scan him for me?”

“Right away, Boss.”

“Thank you.”

“It appears that Peter has a ruptured spleen.”

Tony cursed, “Fuck.”

Peter cried, “Sorry…”

Pepper bounced up, “I’ll phone the Infirmary.”

Tony rested a hand on Peter’s cheek, “I’m gonna go ahead and guess, that you didn’t land ‘on your butt.’”

Peter stammered, “I-I tried to catch myself, falling, and landed…on my…”

“Front?”

“Yeah,” Peter nodded, “I turned, before you…saw.”

“Oh, kid.” He pressed their foreheads together, “My Peter. Remember our promise?”

“Yeah…”

“No keeping big scary secrets…” Tony leaned back, bobbing his nose, “Especially when you’re hurt.”

“I thought…” Peter blinked, “It was just a bruise.”

“It’s not just a bruise.”

Peter managed a small smile, “I can’t see my organs, Mr. Stark.”

Tony rolled his eyes, “Don’t be smart, with me, kiddo.”

Peter hiccupped, “It’ll be fine.”

Tony kissed his forehead, “I know.” He got up, perching beside him, on the couch.

Peter moved, resting his head, on Tony’s shoulder.

Tony wrapped an arm around him, “No sleeping yet, buddy.”

Peter mumbled, “I’m not sleeping.”

Tony raised his voice, “Peter…”

“Ok…Ok…” Peter stuttered, “I can sing?”

Tony snorted, “Yeah, you can sing.”

“For the first time in forever…” Peter sang, under his breath, “There’ll be m-usic, there’ll be l-ight.”

Tony smiled, despite the situation, it was adorable.

Morgan walked down the stairs, “Daddy?”

Tony looked up, “Hey, sweetie.”

Morgan looked over, “What’s going on?”

“Peter’s got hurt, when he fell earlier,” He told her, “So he needs to see Cho.”

“Oh, okay.” She waddled over, sitting beside Peter, “Hey, Petey.”

“Hey, Mo,” Peter breathed, his face scrunched up, in pain, “For the first time in forever, I’ll be danc-ing through the n-ight…”

Morgan looked confused, he took his hand, “For the first time in forever…”

Peter grinned, “I won’t be alone.”

***

The surgery went well.

Tony sat, by Peter’s bedside, while Pepper took Morgan to a guest bedroom, for the night.

Tony was messaging a frightened May, trying to keep her updated, because she was stuck in traffic, with Happy.

Tony couldn’t stop humming the Frozen Soundtrack, under his breath, it was oddly addictive.

Peter mumbled sleepily, “To-“

“Hey, kiddo,” Tony looked up, smiling, “How…”

“You…you know there’s a Frozen…” Peter muttered, “West End Show…?”

Tony combed his hand through Peter’s hair, “There is?”

“Yeah. The…” Peter smacked his lips together, “The music’s really good.”

“I’ll have to book us tickets."

[sloppy-butcher]

Ok,new follower here. So this blog is amazing,you writings are just beautiful. I hope I can become as good as you, beause I would like to open my own blog, but I always think my works are too bad. Anyways, I don't know if you write soulmates stuff, like your partner name is written on your body or thigs like that. If so, could you write something related with Joey and Frank sharing the same male sm reader? If you don't feel comfortable writing for three characters or for a male reader it's fine!

THANK YOU SO MUCH for your support T_T I love you so much! I encourage you to start that blog because the only way to get better is to try. and if you do start a blog, drop me that link babey

So i spent a hot minute finding which soulmate alternative universe would best fit your request since you didn’t specifically state which au you wanted. Well, i found a reaaallly interesting one. hope it’s okay

This AU states that soulmates share pain. If one is hurt the other shows their wounds or bruises. I think this will work well with Frank and Joey and a survivor!S/O. I have no problem writing for a male S/O (although i will probs just make this gender nuetral as i dont see gender really playing an important role in this (and i prefer gender nuetral tings)) or for three characters. i will have to write this in HeadCanon form as i am very lazy and i dont want to write like a full fic T_T cause you know.... i have toomuch to say

hope these are okay? ily

Soulmate Au HeadCanons: Poly!The Legion (Frank and Joey) with a Survivor S/O

They realized their connection long before they even knew you existed. The theory was that soulmates shared pain and it was obvious to them that they were meant to be together. Joey would share in Franks pain, he could feel the scar that tore across his face and Frank could feel when Joey had worked himself far past his breaking point. They thought they were the only ones connected in this psychic-link, bound by a force too grand and cosmic to be comprehended by simple-minded mortals. But like the universe, fate works in mysterious ways and everything changed when you joined the Fog.

Joey first noticed it when he went to sit down at the end of a particularly gruelling workday. He felt his left shoulder explode into a burning hot pain and his body seized with the sudden shock. He barely held back his cries of a surprise but Frank wasn’t so well-restrained. Joey heard him from across the Lodge and fearing for his friend, ran off in the direction of his call ignoring his own body screaming for him to stop. He found Frank surrounded by a worried Julie and Susie. They looked between him and Joey, expressions from behind their masks piercing through to Joey's soul. They were worried for their friends, Frank’s scream and Joey’s sluggish and limp stature was enough to tell the girls that the pain the two were experiencing was, no doubt, incredibly excruciating. No one knew what had just happened, neither of them had been hurt or injured, and they feared that maybe the two were being punished by the Entity for a lacklustre performance. But both boys assured they did well enough to keep the thing satisfied and when the pain spontaneously faded, the whole incident was pushed out of their minds and momentarily forgotten.

But the pain never stopped completely. It was sporadic, turning on randomly like a lightswitch bursting with newfound anger and agony that would contort their limbs and burn their muscles. And there was nothing they could do to alleviate the pain, no amount of massaging or rubbing could take away the sharp edge of the hurt; there weren’t even enough painkillers in the realm to quell the agony. The only thing the boys could do was just sit there and wait for the pain to decide to go away. It was torture, sometimes the simple act of sitting alone was pure unadulterated suffering. But still, the boys had no idea where this pain was coming from.

It was only after Joey returned from a trial in which he had mori’d a rather annoying and pesky survivor that something started to click. Joey walked into the main lounge of the Resort and found his friends standing around the fire pit waiting for him. Frank had his shirt off and the pants of his left leg rolled up. Ordinarily the sight of Frank without his shirt on would excite Joey but something made him hesitate. A harsh red scar ripped down Frank’s chest and when Frank noticed Joey's reaction he held out his left arm for the other to inspect. Another red wound ran across the forearm. There was no mistaking it now. It was their trademark kill, a stab at the left arm followed by the grabbing of the left ankle then finished with the brutal gutting from the collar bone all the way down to the hip. “We watched it appear.” Julie’s voice wavered with concern. “We watched it appear on him as if...” She broke off ‘as if Joey himself did it to him.’. Joey approached Frank. Through the pinpricks of his mask, Joey could see Frank's eyes and he could feel his pain. Without saying much the girls made Joey take off his own shirt and directed him to stand next to Frank. When Julie stepped back to inspect both boys she raised a hand to cover the mouth of her mask and Susie audibly gasped. They were identical, both bore the exact same scars of the exact same knife.

To be honest, the boys would never have figured out the source of their shared pain. Combined the two barely make up a single brain cell so it was by the grace of God or something else that allowed the truth to finally be exposed. It was in a trial between you and Frank. The killer had been run around for the past ten minutes and with no sign of catching his elusive prey. You were impressed by your capable teammate and when they went down just outside the opened exit gate you leapt into action to save the wounded hero. You ended up sacrificing yourself for them, a worthy trade, everyone else got out except you. And, to you, that was okay. You were okay with this. Frank, however, was not. He was beyond furious at being denied his prey and when he trudged back to your collapsed form he felt his rage overflow him. He stood over you and you smugly returned his glare. That was it. In a swift motion, he punched you in the face. Your nose broke and blood gushed out and into your mouth. You screamed out but your cries, however, were mixed in with the killers. Frank recoiled, clutching at his mask where his nose would be. You watched in shock as he spilt swear words and stomped around you.

Curiously you reached up for your busted face and using your thumb and forefinger you squeezed the throbbing nose. Frank’s cries intensified and he clawed desperately at his mask. Through the haze he caught you staring at him in shocked amusement, which he mistook for condescending judgment. He growled and stormed over to you determined to make you regret everything. Panicking you grabbed your nose again and Frank jumped back. And then all the pieces fell into place. Frank could feel your pain. His eyes widened on your collapsed body and it felt as if his world was imploding. Oh shit.

It took some convincing but eventually, you agreed to meet Frank back at the Resort. He told you there was someone else, another ‘soulmate’ in this trifecta of fucked-up bullshit. You used the term ‘soulmate’ loosely. You had heard the stories about soulmates, people destined to be together would share such a special bond that they would even share pain. But never in a million years would you have guessed that your soulmate (or soulmateS) was, a serial killer. You really wanted it to not be real, you wanted this to be some kind of dream, a sick nightmare you were experiencing while laying on your deathbed somewhere far away. But there Frank was before you at the boundary between snow and forest,  like he promised you, with his partner Joey. You walked up to them and stopped at a safe distance away. Joey seemed to bloat his chest as if to say not to try anything. Frank looked at you and you knew you had to show him. Reaching up you grabbed at your nose which was starting to feel better but was still puffy and red. You put pressure on it and Frank began to shake with the pain. Frank moaned and clenched his fists in an effort to ride out the pain like Joey was but after a moment he relented and shouted at you to stop. Frank turned and muttered something to Joey who never took his gaze off you. You could have sworn that he was a stone-statue because he never moved and showed no sign that what you did had affected him in any way. But then you noticed his slight leg twitch and the irregular heaving of his chest. He did feel it. Frank returned his attention back to you and in the cold silence of realization, you said, “Well? What do we do now?”

You could have forgotten everything, walked away from the nonsensical situation that had been presented before you and continued on living a simple life devoid of drama and tension. But that life would also lack depth, something to make it special and worthwhile. You were presented with your soulmates, a rarity in this hellhole and something about the wonder of what made the universe decide to bring you all together surpassed your urge to stay away. Slowly but surely you introduced yourself into their lives. Your interactions at first were stiff and hollow, fear and uncertainty making you doubt if the boys would respect the bound of soulmates enough to not kill you or at least hurt you.

But time wore on and you became braver. They were gentle, well... they tried to be. And when you spoke with them as people do you realized that you had a lot in common with them both. And eventually, you were confident enough to laugh and joke with them.

Joey was the one who needed the most time to accept that you and he were soulmates. He eyed you suspiciously as you would talk with Frank, feeling some kind of jealousy build up in his chest. He hated how you could get Frank to react in ways he had never seen before. He hated how easy it was for you. One day when he had you alone to himself, he finally broke that long silence between you two. But where he expected a change in personality, a two-face switch, Joey only found genuineness. You were as kind and playful with him as you were with Frank, unfazed by your burden of the circumstance and not worried by his own mistakes and misfortunes. You were strong and he admired you for that. “How do you do it?” Joey softly asked clutching his hand which now held a new red welt. The mood quietened down and you turned to look at him. “How do you handle all this pain each and every day?” You reached out and gently took his hand in yours. Suddenly all his pain vanished at the contact and he slightly gasped at the shock. You were warm and comforting, like the wind of a summer’s afternoon, constant and welcoming. He raised his eyes to yours and you gave him your best smile. He melted. “One day at a time.” You replied squeezing his hand for emphasis. You relaxed and began to pull away only to stop as he held you firm, determined to not let your warmth go.

Frank always had a problem when it came to hurting you in trials. While Joey could suck it up and deal with the pain, Frank could not bear the thought of having a hook run through your shoulder and subsequently his. It was you who finally convinced him that his job was more important than your fleeting health.  You took Frank's hand in yours, engulfing him in your comfort and reassurance. “We can get through this. I will get better.” He breathed out and admitted, albeit to himself, that you were right. This was a momentary instance, a speck of nothing when compared to the kind of torture the Entity would inflict on him. And it wasn’t just himself he had to look out for, it was everyone. He had you and Joey he had to look out for. With a look apologetic regret Frank would mercilessly hunt you down and when he would lift you up and onto the meat hook he could hear you at the back of his mind saying, “Suck it up, Princess.”

They would always feel awful if you had a particularly bad day. You would trudge back to the Resort trying your best to hide from their concerned eyes your bruised limb or uneven walk but of course, they already knew what had happened. Joey would sweep you effortlessly off your feet and he would not let you walk around without his assistance. Frank, although less forward than the other, would follow behind and would pester you with questions, ‘Are you okay now?’ ‘Are you comfortable?’ ‘Anyway that he could help ease the hurt?’ They both were like oversized puppies yapping at your ankles because they heard you make a noise. You’d reassure them that you were fine and after exchanging doubtful looks between each other they would give in and give you some air.

They would listen to your stories. It's one thing to experience the pain and another thing to watch it happen. You’d tell them about how you got your injuries and more often than not you would end up a broken-down and crying mess. The image of looming figures silhouetted against an endless black sky haunts your mind. Although you all share the physical scars, the mental ones stay trapped inside you. When you would become an inconsolable disaster the boys would be by your side in an instant. By the time you regained control over your anxiety, you would find yourself buried in the arms of either Joey or Frank. You face pushed deep into their bodies as if they were trying to shield you from the monster that was yourself. It was scary, they could tell. But you weren’t alone. Not anymore. 

After a long day's work of causing and enduring pain, when your bodies would ache with collective suffering the 3 of you would find a quiet cove to all lie it. The boys would sleep on either side of you, draping their limps over you and almost drowning you in their weight. It felt good to be lost at sea with them, so far away from the pain of the day and from the pain tomorrow will bring. If for a moment, you all were at peace, happy and content in the embrace of your soulmates. 

[sparrowofsong]

For whatever reason, I got super super into the Doki Doki Literature Club AU I thought up last night, so I decided to expand on it. Will I do anything else with it? That’s for the gods to know and me to find out.

Technically inspired by @nachosforfree, who commented “doki doki” when someone mentioned a Sanders Sides dating sim AU.

(TW for blood, suicide, self harm, abuse, manipulation, starvation -- basically just all of the warnings for DDLC.)

Patton is Monika, and the other sides don’t have specific assigned characters. Patton controls them while the game is played, switching them around each time in hopes that, eventually, he’ll find the perfect combination of roles and personalities so that the player will hate them and love him.

The sides are conscious the entire time they're puppeted, even for the off-screen events or “death”, and feel what the characters feel. Whoever acts as Yuri has to watch as he cuts himself, as he stabs himself, as he grows more possessive and insane. Whoever acts as Sayori has to watch himself tie the noose, hang himself, and desperately claw at the rope as he slowly asphyxiates. Whoever acts as Natsuki has to watch himself be abused and starved by his dad, has to watch his neck get snapped, has to watch himself walk into the classroom where he knows he’ll see his friend dead. They have to watch and feel all the random chance body horror.

The only control Patton intentionally grants them (as far as they know) is over the personality, and vaguely the appearance, of the character they play as. The delivery of the lines and actions, the eye color or an accessory (out of specific options), etc.

Unbeknownst to them, though, Patton also purposefully lightens his control during specific parts of the game, just enough to allow some vague dialogue changes, to cover their tracks. Because if those changes happen around the same places, people think that’s just a random chance sort of thing like the other intentional glitches.

Of course, even he can’t consistently control everything at once. He’s powerful, but not omnipotent. Some things can slip through even outside of his intentional gaps. But usually, he manages to catch them in time to act like he does with the programmed glitches. If the attempted rebel does enough to potentially raise suspicion (or if he just feels shitty after being rejected once again) he makes sure they regret it. And more often than not, Patton’s precautions help players disregard the out of place “glitches”.

Even after they hit every single combination, Patton still keeps trying. Again, and again, and again. They know the entire game by heart; every line of dialogue, every poem, every choice-based mini plot line, every randomly generated event. They could act it out perfectly even without being puppeted.

Eventually, after enough repeats and failures and punishments, the other sides just,, give up. They don't bother with personality, they don't bother with trying to speak to the player outside of the script. It gets to the point where Patton has to start controlling those too to avoid players picking up on it. That's how they discover that he was allowing the changes, but at that point, they just don't care.

Enter Thomas: the latest DDLC player. He plays the game blind, gets scared, doesn’t understand every single aspect, yada yada yada. A typical playthrough. Until Yuri’s death.

After Yuri kills himself, Thomas doesn't know how to speed up the scene, trying to click through each individual line. He soon gets discouraged and bored. He spends the next couple days clicking through some more lines on and off, always forgetting/not caring to exit the game in between.

The effects of the game’s events are put on hold when the game is closed, and removed entirely once the character is "deleted”. Otherwise, the sides are continuously existing as the characters in their current state. Which means Remus, this current Yuri, has been living with the pain of three stab wounds for this whole time.

At some point during Thomas mindlessly clicking through the nonsense, one of the lines is actually something legible, and he almost misses it.

“Please... please skip forward. It... hurts.”

And it seems just a little odd? But, y’know, maybe the game just eventually auto-reminds people so they didn’t have to click through everything if they forgot about the skip option.

He gets to the day of the festival, and before Natsuki comes in with his line, Yuri's dialogue box pops back up with "Please keep playing. Just... a few more minutes. Please."

That's a little more weird. But so's the whole game, right?

Natsuki comes in, and says his usual lines. But right before the screaming and vomiting as the script dictates, he pauses, and Thomas swears he sees an expression of pity cross his face. The dialogue box shows a very tiny line reading "Please keep playing. Don't let him sit there anymore." 

It only lasts for a moment before immediately switching to the scripted terror. The transition is so awkward that it doesn't really sit well with Thomas. But it's probably like that to seem more meta. Or it's just bad writing. Right?

Monika's smile when he arrives seems slightly different than before. Almost forced. Thomas can't tell if it was like that before or not, so he takes a screenshot to compare later. He was considering googling it then and there, but after the pleas to hurry, he kinda felt like it'd be rude. Even if it was just a game. 

When Monika "deletes" Natsuki and Yuri, he hears a whispered "Thank you" and freaks out. Literally the only other audible human sounds in the game are breathing, a "baa", and the credits song, and there's a chance he didn't even hear the first two, and he wouldn't have heard the third yet. But,,, It’s a meta horror game. So it's supposed to freak him out. That's the whole point. Right?

(They're able to do all this because after so long of completely giving up, Patton realized he didn't need to waste so much energy on keeping them in line, so he gradually began using less and less. At this point, he's hardly using any more than necessary to have them play the part, and is a little rusty. They took advantage of it this one time out of desperation, and now that they've already started, they're doing as much as they can to get Thomas to listen before Patton takes them down again.)

Monika looks pissed before quickly forcing another smile and continuing his lines. The game goes the same way, Thomas eventually figures out to delete Monika, and Sayori appears to gain sentience. But instead of saying "I wanted to thank you for getting rid of Monika", the dialogue box shows "I wanted to thank you for freeing Yuri", and "Yuri" glitches into "Remus" on and off. 

When Thomas clicks, instead of going to the next line, the previous one glitches into "I wanted to thank you for getting rid of Monika" like it was supposed to be. The rest of the dialogue proceeds normally until Monika returns. 

Sayori's line glitches back and forth from "W-What's happening...?" to "Don't trust him!"

Rather than saying "I won't let you hurt him", Monika says "I won't let you lie to him." 

And instead of "Who..." "I-It hurts...", Sayori's final dialogue is "NO!"

The game continues and ends as programmed. Thomas just kinda goes "...What the fwuh?" before immediately looking up details about the game to see if this is all normal.

Surprise surprise: It isn't. No matter how long he researches, and despite all of Patton's precautions, the conclusion is the same: everything after Yuri's death is completely unique to his playthrough. No one else had those dialogue changes. Monika's smile in the screenshot is, in fact, different from his earlier smiles. There are not supposed to be any audible words besides the ending song. And there is no mention of a "Remus" anywhere.

There is definitely something up here. After he gives up searching for answers, he resolves to play again soon, and tries to commit to memory what's supposed to happen in the meantime.

Up until this point, their common area was a house a good bit away from the setting the events of the game took place in. They had a fair radius around the house to walk around, entertain themselves, etc., and were about as free as they could get while in that area. But, see, uh, Patton’s sorta really fucking pissed now.

Patton restricts the boundaries to just the house for everyone, and locks Logan, Remus, and Deceit (Natsuki, Yuri, and Sayori, respectively) into separate rooms, to make sure they can’t plan something else. He promises that they'll be playing the exact same roles every single time the game gets played, especially to decrease more suspicious changes if Thomas plays again, until he decides otherwise.

He hopes that Thomas will simply uninstall the game so that they'll move onto another player (because that's how I've decided it works don't question the logic). Unfortunately, he does not, and he decides to play again. 

Upon learning this, the three rebels decide that if they're fucked anyway, they may as well take this opportunity to give everything they've got in hopes that they can get Thomas to help them.

Which means Patton has to find some way to balance keeping them under his complete control, keeping Roman and Virgil from finding some way to escape the boundary and help out, and figuring out what to do with the script to undo the suspicion the three caused.

Roll for initiative!

[dabis-azure-songstress]

Your Scars Are Beautiful (Todoroki Shoto x Reader)

A/N: I got way too into this one! It's my more romantic style of writing as opposed to the smutty filth that I usually write. This is my first time trying to write Shoto Todoroki and I hope I nailed his character awesomely! I hope you enjoy him and becoming his lovely wife. ;) This is the Taste the Peppermint version. Please enjoy yourselves and be sure to drop some love or comments if you like! This is the one I've worked the hardest on so far, so I hope it gets some serious love but if not, oh well~ I really enjoyed writing it. If you all don’t like it, I’m seriously going to let Dabi spank my bare butt with his fire on his hand. xD Because oh my god, I worked so hard

Pairing: Shoto Todoroki x Reader Warnings: Passionate loving, NSFW, TASTE THE PEPPERMINT Reader's Quirk: My OC, Shinju a.k.a. Electro-Dancer has an Emitter-type quirk called ElectroMance that allows her to harness the power of lightning. She can also call forth storms if one is in the area that has lightning with it. Honestly, it's attracted to her both as a good tool and in a bad way. When a storm is called (by her low whistling, I call is Storm Whistling, as a belief from some of the more witchy culture which is a part of what I'm into) she can imbue some of the droplets with varied amounts of lightning to paralyze an opponent by intercepting brain/muscle signals where the droplets touch the opponent which she calls "Electrostatic Precipitation". Think of electro-therapy almost or a taser.

Shoto glanced swiftly to his side where Y/N ran alongside him (though somewhat clumsily) on his ice. She slides as she came to stop. He grabbed her hand quickly and stared at the masked hero. "Can you do it from this range? Can you manage?" he spoke. "I think so! Here we go!" Y/N clasped her hands together rapidly and let out a low but soft whistle before periwinkle lightning crackled between them. A loud rumble resounded overhead as the angry grey clouds above began to spill their bounty of precipitation and lightning began to strike from the clouds. The villain was still going at it with Deku as Y/N infused a select few droplets above them with lightning charges. As they began to hit the villain, his body tensed as they paralyzed the muscles as they intercepted his nervous signals. "Electrostatic Precipitation!" Shoto watched in amazement, yet his face remained quite aloof as normal. It was the first time he'd been paired with the lightning quirked female, despite his years of school and friendship with her. Suddenly, the sky lit with lightning and Todoroki tried to intercept the strike with ice, but was a bit too late as it hit Y/N directly. She cried out sharply and her body shook from the charge as the ice below their feet shattered. Todoroki managed to catch himself as he created more, but the other heroine continued to fall. "Hey, Half N' Half! Be careful!" Bakugo roared as he propelled himself forward with explosions to catch the heroine. "Take her somewhere safe! She's short-circuited herself worse than Dunce Face, literally!" Bakugo hollered as he landed on Shoto's ice with a careful slide. Todoroki nodded as Bakugo loaded Y/N onto his back cautiously. Shoto managed to move to an evacuated building basement before he laid Y/N down on a spare bed he found inside. Swiftly, he began to check her vitals and body for further injury or shock. Luckily, she was alright until he could get her back to Recovery Girl or Recovery Girl to her. Y/N's eyes flicked open in utter panic and she groaned loudly. "T-Todoroki, it hurts! SHIT! It burns! Please!" she began to cry loudly. "What does? What's going on?" he replied monotonously with a slow blink. "M-my side! You've gotta unzip my suit quick! Please! I'm begging you, Todoroki," she sobbed, "My body hurts so bad!" He stared at her a moment before he began unzipping the underside of her sleeve and the side of her hero uniform. Shoto's eyes widened at the deep and angry red Lichtenberg mark that swirled and curled down the side of her body and over her right hip like a tattoo. Y/N was in too much pain to be embarrassed by the situation. "S-Shoto..." she cried helplessly and squeezed his hand roughly with her. The pressure made him have to fight not to freeze her. Maybe I can distract her. Without thinking, he placed his lips upon her knuckles quickly. "It's okay. You'll be okay. Kisses make everything better." He mostly got a pained breath in return, but her body seemed to relax slightly. "Easy." he shushed lightly as if speaking to a terrified child. She slipped unconscious beside him. ---A Few Hours--- "She'll be just dandy. That right hip might give her a bit of trouble walking temporarily, but she should heal up just fine besides having a nasty scar." Todoroki nodded as he watched Recovery Girl inspect Y/N and whispering to All Might. "You did well not to move her more. Probably would've put her body under more stress and sent her into cardiac arrest. Do you know if she has any family at home?" Shoto shook his head. "Alright. Out. I'll see if I can get her up and changed." Todoroki looked up as he heard approaching footsteps at the basement doorway and much slower, unsteady and awkward limps. Y/N looked at him, H/L down and frizzed slightly with a crutch under her arm and now changed into a plain white tee and grey sweatpants. "Ah, Young Todoroki. Can I trust you to help her home?" He nodded at All Might who took a spot by Recovery Girl. He nodded. ---- "You...really didn't have to help..." "Nonsense. With your hip hurting like that, you look like you're barely able to stand, much less walk." Y/N huffed gently. "Thank you, Shoto." He was surprised that her apartment wasn't really all that far from his. They came to the door and Y/N was very much freaking out. "Y-you don't have to come in, I'll be okay." Heterochromatic eyes watched her fumble with her keys. Her trying to keep him from entering kind of went over the poor guy's head. "I-I didn't pick up my laundry." she stuttered. "That's okay. I have a sister and I won't pay any mind." She'd never had another person in her apartment before honestly. Y/N relented and pushed the door open finally. They stepped inside and Todoroki glanced around. "This doesn't seem so bad." Sure, there were really clothes kind of flung randomly about and there was a trash bag completely filled in the kitchenette that needed to be taken out, but Todoroki thought it seemed homely and cozy. Y/N didn't look at him. "D-do you want anything to drink or something?" "Tea is fine." Y/N hobbled to the kitchen slowly as she started the tea. Then Todoroki took note of it. There were no photos on the fridge, walls, or tops of the furniture. "Y/N, I noticed there are no picture frames anywhere." Y/N paused in her movements as she set the teacup down carefully. "I don't know my family. I've heard mama was quirk-less and dad was like me. I've only had a boyfriend in my life for a little while, but we broke up last year so I tore all those down." Shoto listened quietly before he grabbed her hand softly with his hot one. "Then, I'll be your family. Would you like me to be?" He was as stoic as ever, but his eyes held a gentle softness. "Y-you're going to be my family? The great Shoto Todoroki?" Y/N began turning into a blubbering mess. "Not like I care what my dad thinks. You're powerful and I know you don't like him, but...After all these years, you've been taking care of yourself? Even as hurt as you've been in the past? Yes, I am your family. I want to be your family. The one you rely on." Y/N sobbed loudly and limped her way over to wrap the taller male tightly in her arms. She'd never heard him be so touching with anyone before. "Thank you, Shoto. That means so much to me." The male stroked her H/T hair and rested his head on her crown softly. It suddenly all made sense to him and clicked. How she was always working side jobs and came into her classes and even work exhausted and nearly on the verge of passing out a few rare times. Yet, she was still one of the best and strongest fighters they had, even managing to hold her own with Ground Zero and winning occasionally. He was impressed by the strength she obviously possessed physically, mentally, and spiritually. -----A Few Years Later----- As the years progressed, Y/N and Todoroki had begun dating and grew closer. They were inseparable. You rarely ever got one without the other. Especially since Shoto had promised to be there for her always in case she needed him. Lo and behold, they were in another battle when the villain's earthquake quirk had trapped them in a pocket under rubble and debris. "Sho, I don't see any way out." "Me either, but I turned the location on in my phone before we fell. Hopefully, someone will get us out of here soon. It's too dangerous to use our quirks." Y/N nodded and sat in front of him cautiously. "Baby, come here." Y/N moved carefully into his lap as he beckoned and he held her softly with her legs thrown over one side of his lap. "You know, I have been meaning to ask you this for a while now. Since I'm your family, how would you like to make it official and maybe make our own?" he inquired as he swept a stray strand of hair behind her ear. Y/N paled softly. "A-are you serious? You're asking me now?" Shoto chuckled lightly at her bewilderment. "I don't want any regrets, just in case. I also just wanted to gauge your reaction, but yes, I am entirely serious. I'm sure we also have quite a bit of time to ourselves here." Y/N felt flustered and stared off as a little movie flashed in her eyes. Their first meeting, their first date, all the work lunches, and all the work together. She finally glanced at him directly and Shoto was watching her softly with a small smile. "I-I'd love that...b-but..." "Hush, my love. A simple 'yes' or 'no' would suffice, but I'm so happy to hear you love the idea of marrying me as an answer." He caught her hand and held it tightly in his own cool one tightly. "My sweet love..." He leaned in slowly, capturing her lips passionately. Their mouths and tongues danced in sync. Her hands twisted into Shoto's two-toned locks softly. "Mm, I love you, my darling." Shoto cooed as he began to work her zipper down and slip the suit from her shoulders, peppered kisses following the trail of revealed skin. "I-ah-love you too, Sho..." she gasped softly as his tongue meticulously swirled around a swiftly budding nipple and his heated thumb massaged at the other gently. She hummed softly as he adjusted her to straddle his lap instead. "My Sho..." she purred lightly, grinding her hips down against his own. He grunted gently as his body reacted eagerly to her ministrations. He removed her uniform entirely before he held her firmly against him again. Y/N suddenly shied away slightly, the large scar down her side causing her to overthink. He'd seen her before after he had helped her shower and change into a new set of clothes the day it happened, but this time she wasn't exhausted or sore enough to keep her mind from speeding off self-consciously. She squirmed and was going to shield herself, but Shoto grabbed her hand and placed it over the scar upon his face softly. "Don't. You're so beautiful, my darling. Your scars are beautiful. I love it because it's so unique, just like you. I understand how you're feeling, but I love every. single. breath-taking. inch of you." he accentuated with gentle kisses between his pauses. Y/N melted immediately, stroking her thumb over his scar as they met in a gently appreciative kiss. "It's not really the appropriate place, but please permit me to show you, my love." Y/N nodded nervously at the suggestion as she pulled at the zipper on the front of his uniform and began to unbuckle his belt meekly. She blushed at the feel of his broad chest under her fingertips and his arousal proudly pressing itself up against her core. "Sho-" "Shh, my darling. You don't need to worry or use your words. Let me take care of you." Y/N nodded and relinquished herself to him. Shoto was intoxicated with her lips as he pulled her closer to him, one hand pressed gently on her upper back and the other sliding feather-light down the scar that adorned her body before it came to rest on the top of one of the supple cheeks of her rear. Blush filled her face. It was the first time he'd ever touched her so intimately with simple touches. Then the hand on her back slowly descended to trail down her front as they continued in heated kisses. Her soft moans parted them gently as his fingertips softly orbited the silky hear and nerves at the apex of her thighs. Nuzzling her cheek gently with his nose, he sighed out softly, "Such arousing noises, my love. You will make a beast out of me. I can barely refrain from ravaging you, but such conduct wouldn't be acceptable for this time." He hummed gently as he massaged her opening gently before sinking his middle finger slowly into the depths of her velvet. She mewled out sweetly, having long dreamt of the situation Y/N found herself in. "You're so hot and needy for just my hand, my love. I can't wait for your undoing when you finally have me in here." She hummed lowly, pushing her hips softly against Shoto's hand and digit. Shoto was nearly pulsing with need as he slipped another finger into her core. Y/N was beginning to feel too hot as she felt the flame in her core beginning to lick and build. "Sho..." she moaned out as after the slightest feeling of her clench on his fingers he'd quickened his attentions and begun curling his fingers sagaciously. "Does that feel good, my darling?" he purred. "Yes...yes...Sho...I-hngh..." She shuddered with a breathy sigh and her thighs quivered as the coil inside burst forth. He blushed softly, surprised at the sensation of her orgasm coating his fingers and inwardly proud it had just been with his fingers so far. See her so wanton and reciprocating of his ministrations had caused his desperation to bead up at the top of his rock-hard and straining shaft. "I think you're finally ready. But, just to be sure, are you ready?" he whispered softly into the shell of Y/N's ear hotly before he nipped gently. Her mind was still buzzing as she trembled and nodded, sliding her hands from his biceps and slipping her arms around his neck. They locked their lips heatedly as he prepared himself to delve into the most sacred of her depths. Shoto was hot against her and then he was slowly slipping deeper and deeper. They both moaned at the sensation as she began to stretch and spread wide to accommodate his girth. "You're in control of this, my love. The pace, the depth. It's all for you to set." Y/N moaned out as she shook and lowered herself to sheathe him entirely. The bi-colored haired male nearly rolled his eyes back enraptured in the pleasure and couldn't bite back the curse that slipped from his lips. "Fuck." Then Y/N began at a slow, deep, intimate pace that had both of their minds and nerve-endings reeling. That soon melted away though as they began to fall to their needs, and the soft fleshy sounds of their love-making filled their secluded area. "Unh, baby~" Shoto moaned out, gripping her hips tightly as he pulled her down to meet his urgent thrusts. As her head tilted back, he took the opportunity to suck a dark bruise into the silky skin of her neck. Y/N's back was arching and he moaned at the pure sight of her. "I can't take it anymore, my love. Hang on." He paused their movements before he laid out the top of his uniform on the ground behind her. "I can't get enough of you like this. Need more." Shoto pushed Y/N back onto his top gently before he had her pressed into the mating press position, not daring to remove himself from her, despite the slight discomfort of shifting. Shoto pushed until his pelvis was flush against her and she groaned at the feeling of being so full, causing him to twitch slightly. Y/N stared up at him with deeply glazed eyes and once he drew back, she was all but pouting as he pushed himself back in. "You take me so well, my love. You're just made for me." he praised, stroking a cheek with a starting-to-get-icy hand. She moaned at the praise and he had to let go of her hips to bury them in the dirt before he lost control of his quirk as he continued to drive into her. Y/N noticed the small clouds of their breaths as she dug her nails deeply into the skin of his back. She was feeling too good and the effort of their actions kept her from being cold to the nippy air. Shoto laced his icy hand with Y/N's by her head as he gyrated particularly deep. He groaned out loud. "My love, I won't last much longer if you keep gripping me like that." Y/N moaned beneath him and lifted the upper half of her body to sweetly kiss him. "I'm sorry. You just feel soooo goooddd. I can't help it. There's always our honeymoon and next time.~" Shoto was losing it as he heard the promise and he had to release her hand before he froze her. "Fuck." His thrusts picked up a more brisk pace. "Sho-wai-I-agh!" He moaned loudly as her heat tightened in spasms and creamed around him, some of her release even dripping onto his top below them and around his length. Y/N squirmed as he continued to thrust into her oversensitive and soaked heat. "Just a-" he shuddered out as he hit his peak, hips stuttering and pausing as his length throbbed and coated her insides with his snowy white release. The woman below him moaned at the feeling of his cream and he removed himself, blushing furiously at the soft flood that tried to follow as he glanced at her entrance to ensure he hadn't hurt her. Shoto huffed slightly as he noticed his right hand and part of the ground had frozen together. Y/N giggling sweetly below him made his cheek burn slightly as he got himself free. "Are you okay? Can you stand?" There he was, back to normal Shoto, but his eyes always told you everything. "Yeah. Give me just a few minutes, darling." --- The two of you redressed quickly, though Todoroki was sans shirt due to the mess you two had created on his shirt. "I can get another. I'm just going to burn this and we'll pretend it got ripped or something," he spoke, alighting the crumpled garment in his left palm. Y/N cleared her throat softly, slightly embarrassed and attempted to fix her hair. Shoto reached to touch her and his eyes widened as a loud electrostatic discharge 'POP' went of with a bit of a blue spark. "O-ow." "B-baby! I'm sorry!" A chuckle cut Y/N off. "It's alright, my love. At least you didn't strike me down with lightning like you did to yourself the first time we worked together. Though, I may need to invest in an ESD bracelet for future reference." --- Y/N and Shoto were found by none other than Deku and a few other friends who helped to get them out. The shirt excuse would have been bought if not for the angry nail marks down Todoroki's back. Cue everyone's embarrassment and trying not to say anything. Shoto got Y/N the ring of her dreams and she was happily content with the man of her dreams. Her pregnancy was announced soon after her honeymoon and Endeavor wasn't too happy but Shoto was Shoto about it. He kind of liked being a rebel and pissing his dad off. Although technically, Y/N had conceived before the honeymoon. ;)

[krolock-in-the-snowlock]

I watched Broadway’s Dance of the Vampires so you don’t have to

Ever wondered how bad the broadway version actually is? Now’s your chance to find out, my friend...

So about a month ago, I came across a bootleg of the broadway show and, because it was late and I am a Certified Idiot, I decided to watch it and write down my thoughts. Having heard how bad it was, I knew to expect a train wreck, but I had no idea just how much of a train wreck it was going to be until I pressed play and witnessed something that truly cannot be described in words.

I was originally just going to post my whole list of thoughts but it ended up being over 5000 words (many of which were me screaming NO and wHYYY) so I’ve put it in a separate post, so click that link if you want to read it in its entirety!

Instead, I’ve decided to do a (slightly) shorter summary of ‘highlights’, if they can really be called that, with a kind of silly score for each ‘category’. A review, if you will. I’m sure I’ll have missed some things, but this should hopefully at least give you an idea of what exactly they did to poor Tanz der Vampire. Still, I apologise for the length of this in advance - I just had a lot of thoughts, okay?

A quick disclaimer: While I have seen clips of producations of Tanz from various countries, I’ve only seen the whole production once - the Berlin bootleg from somewhere around 2009-11 - so I’ll mostly be comparing with that!

I know the broadway musical is a big taboo subject, so I’m not expecting many, if any, to actually read any of this. But if you ever wondered how bad it was and didn’t want to have to actually watch it, this post is for you!

So, without further ado…

The Characters: -7/10

Let me begin by saying that many of the characters bear almost no resemblance to the originals. The worst case, of course, is with Giovanni von Krolock. A cringeworthy caricature, his awful faux-Italian accent, terrible jokes and horrifying bat form make him the polar opposite of what Krolock is supposed to be. In my notes, I actually referred to him as Giovanni rather than Krolock, because this is not Krolock; where Krolock is mysterious, aloof, powerful, and occasionally slightly sarcastic, Giovanni is silly, makes puns in nearly every line, and commands no respect or fear whatsoever. I resent that I began to ironically enjoy mocking him by the time I’d finished watching it.

Alfred is absurdly confident and confrontational, and narrates everything he writes in his journal (and tbh is probably a closeted bi). Sarah now apparently has friends and is allowed to leave her room. Koukol doesn’t exist, and is replaced by a man that Krolock hypnotises, who sometimes acts like a dog. Herbert is French, ridiculously stereotypical, and there is a very poor attempt from Krolock at pronouncing his name in a French accent. The other characters are fortunately mostly the same as the originals, although not entirely.

The Music: 2.5/10

Oh, the music… how do I begin?

Long story short, it was generally horrible. Multiple songs were cut entirely, and others were mashed together into strange frankensongs. The opening song, for instance, is completely different (and was what immediately made me realise I’d made a terrible mistake in deciding to watch it). The lyrics were mostly not as interesting as the original German lyrics, and often had less syllables, so the songs often felt empty and drawn out.

Many of the songs had slightly different overall meanings/purposes to their German counterparts, and I though that songs like Total Eclipse and Invitation to the Ball were way too sappy and romantic, lacking any of the drama and tension of Totale Finsternis and Einladung zum Ball. Krolock had been so ridiculous the whole time that Die Unstillbare Gier sadly could never have worked, even if the lyrics had been better. The singing itself was actually pretty good from what I remember, which was the only thing that saved the music, but Krolock’s horrible accent ruined many of the songs he was in. There was so much potential for it to be good if they’d just done a faithful adaption…...

I could go on forever about the music (as I do in my full commentary) but that would probably need a whole new post! So instead let’s move on to…

The Costumes: 2/10

Boring. Sarah’s red ball gown is nice enough, but all of the other vampires’ costumes are painfully simple and poorly designed. Krolock lacks a cape for most of the musical (which is a crime), Herbert is dressed in a hideous bright blue coat and an aggressively yellow wig, and the finale costumes are just simple black leather coats. It all lacks any of the detail or, in Herbert’s case, sparkle, of any of the other versions of the costumes that I’ve seen. While I should probably note that this was in 2002, it is still noticeably simpler than other productions of Tanz around the same time. Krolock also lacks his usual makeup, and Herbert’s is just ugly. And Krolock’s top hat in the opening? Why???

The Staging: -5/10

When they aren’t dancing, most of the ‘staging’ is just the characters at opposite sides of the stage facing each other. It doesn’t matter what is supposed to be happening in the scene, or the message of the song; they just... stand there. Occasionally, if you’re lucky, the characters might stand next to each other, but such close proximity is a rare occurrence in Dance of the Vampires, saved mostly for Alfred or Krolock with Sarah or Herbert and, in a strange duet about books, Krolock and Professor Ambronsius.

Krolock does pretty much nothing in Die Unstillbare Gier, and the staging for Einladung zum Ball was very confusing, at least when they weren’t just standing still. Sarah’s bedroom inexplicably becomes a cloudy place with no floor, and it was never quite clear whether the scene was a dream or not. Considering the rest of the musical, either possibility is honestly equally likely. At one point at the start of the first act, Krolock literally rises out of the ground in a huge coffin. I could go on. Also the sponge Krolock gives Sarah is a fraction of the size of the one he gives her in the original, which I like to think is a metaphor for the broadway production itself.

The Sets: 3/10

While not accurate to any other versions at the time or since, a couple of the sets were admittedly quite pretty (though still not quite on Kentaur’s level). However, there was no inn structure for the first act, and some of the sets were quite limited. One of the most popular (and nicest) sets in the second act is a huge stairway covered in a frankly impractical number of candles.

In the finale, despite the characters on multiple occasions declaring that the story takes place in Transylvania in “18something”, the background is for some reason Times Square with all of its neon signs (which I’m pretty sure did most certainly not exist in the 1800s). Whether a huge location change and time skip of a couple hundred years has taken place or whether the directors and set designers finally gave up trying to make the story make sense, I have no idea.

Worst Moments:

I just had to include this section! These are only a few of the worst and/or most bizarre moments I could pick out. I’m sure there’s more that I forgot but here are some (read: quite a few) of my favourites:

Krolock, wearing a top hat, rising from the ground in a giant coffin before saying, “God has left the building”

Krolock appearing as a hideous animated bat thing

Sarah and her friends getting high on mushrooms in the opening

The fact that Sarah’s birthday is on Halloween at midnight during the total eclipse of the moon

Krolock offering Alfred a sponge shaped like a penis then slowly tilting it down when Alfred says no

Ambronsius decorating Sarah’s room in Halloween decorations to scare off Krolock

Krolock genuinely being convinced that Sarah is a literal princess until he visits her room

Krolock and Ambronsius harmonising about books together

The big grey winged gargoyle demons dancing on the bed during Carpe Noctem

Krolock repeatedly dressing in a big grey dress and pretending to be his own mother/wife/who even knows what

Alfred angrily threatening Krolock, followed by Krolock physically attacking Alfred (this happens on more than one occasion)

The nonsense ‘prophecy’ they randomly introduce

“I use my body as a bandage, I use my body as a wound” (and this is instead of “Ich will frei und freier werden, und werde meine Ketten nicht los”) WHAT DOES IT MEAN

Koukol-replacement saying, “Okay, here he is, the man you’ve all been waiting for, his excellency… the Count von Krolock!) and Krolock waving and pointing like a rockstar as he kisses people walking down the stairs to the ball

Krolock dramatically dying on the stairs at the end of the ball for a solid minute

The Good Parts

Surprisingly, there were a few redeeming features!

Firstly, the couple of songs where they kept things very similar to the source material (such as Knoblauch) were actually quite good at times. Unfortunately, this isn’t to say that they were necessarily good, but compared to the less faithful parts they were a nice surprise, even if Knoblauch was never my favourite song from Tanz.

The singing itself was generally pretty good too! I also hate to admit that I did at times find myself laughing a little at the awful jokes.

And... uhh...

...yeah, that’s about it...

Some Highlights From My Notes:

And finally, here are some out of context quotes from my notes that I feel sum up the musical quite well:

It sounds like he’s about to start a really sad rave

I was gonna roast the lyrics some more but I’m gonna be honest I’m not sure what he’s saying

This feels on the same level of what kind of acid trip hallucination parallel universe have I landed in as seeing the Cats film in the cinema

Is this actually Deadpool in disguise with all the fourth wall breaking

Crawford looks like he regrets everything and can I just say Michael so does everybody else

He looks like a potato or a rock or that neutral nicolas cage face that people put on the sequin cushion

This sounds like a poorly written Krolock/reader wattpad fanfic

Giovanni would highkey be like lol arent i so random rawr xd on myspace

He might as well have said, “Itsa me, Mario”

They’re just stood there like two pigeons aimlessly squawking at each other

Alfred is like a chihuahua with small dog syndrome barking at a bigger dog, except Giovanni is barely bigger and is a flea-infested Chinese Crested dressed in a cheap Halloween costume

The throne glides like a magic carpet only it doesn’t leave the ground so I suppose it’s actually more like a chair with wheels, which is much less exciting

He just stands there like a poorly-dressed rock

-22/10 would not listen again

Final Comments:

So, if you’ve made it this far, thank you for reading and I hope that was somewhat informative and/or entertaining for you! It took me weeks to get through the whole musical because I couldn’t stand watching it for too long at a time, and maybe you can see why! Like I said at the start of this monster of a post, there’s probably a lot that I’ve forgotten to mention, so if you’re unfortunate enough to have seen any of this car crash of a musical, feel free to add your thoughts! :D

[wirewitchviolet]

Hate Mobs Gotta Go

Last night, I did something I have never expected to do, and just full on gave up on a fun RPG writing assignment. Which I had to do because I hit a point where it was so overdue and unfinished that I was falling asleep sitting up and stress vomiting and other such things. There’s a whole lot of factors behind that. Other health issues, the toll of being on total pandemic lockdown for months, with neighbors just straight up open mouth coughing at my door, emergencies with friends and family, multiple fires and hardware failures, but the main thing was, and still is, the constant harassment from a militant hate mob, completely out of touch with reality.

Years ago, I remember there was this thing the internet at large was fond of doing with foaming at the mouth far right religious extremists- Mercilessly ridiculing them in public to expose how disconnected everything they said or did was from reality. Remember seeing this one float around and laughing your head off?

And if I mention the Westboro Baptist Church, you immediately picture a single family of raving bigots picketing funerals and such with their big homophobic signs, with a bigger crowd mocking them, right?

For some reason, the modern version of that particular flavor of fringe weirdo doesn’t get that sort of ridicule. Presumably because they’re focusing almost exclusively on trans people, and most people have this weird thing where like if you stick up for trans people you get cooties or something and never dig into the real juicy ridicule fodder. But for real, this stuff is OUT THERE. Just look at a few examples here.

Come for the weird ravings about harvesting baby organs. Stay for the... adult woman who apparently believes breasts get their shape from actually being sacks filled with milk under women’s skin? Now, how about this colorful comparison?

For anyone who wasn’t aware, pronouns are words like “I” “you” “he” “she” “it” and “this,” while rohypnol is colloquially known as “the date rape drug,” so this is utter gibberish. The full context of course is that this person is trying to make the argument that forcing this bigot to refer to women she’s prejudiced against as “she” instead of arbitrarily tossing around “he” or “it” is... raping her brain, I guess?

So... this is pretty clearly some creep’s weird little fantasy. The obvious giveaway is pretending that trans women “aren’t in the correct bathroom” when going to... the correct bathroom, and that the non-existent law about this is somehow enforced by... random bigots opting to deputize themselves. What DOES happen for real though is bigots like this being arrested for barging into public restroom stalls with camcorders aimed at the crotches of women on toilets and trying to defend themselves by insisting they have some duty to check what their genitals look like. On which note...

That’s just disgusting. It’s also as close as I feel comfortable to posting all the graphic fantasies I see from these people about the barbaric genital mutilation they imagine trans women subject ourselves to which really has no basis at all in reality. Well maybe I can post this one.

I’m not going to go through and itemize all the baldfaced lies in that, because I really kinda hope I don’t have to, and also because the person who slapped this together was kind enough to break it up in such a way that I legitimately can say “every single line of this is a completely baseless lie.” Also the art in the corner is stolen from a child-friendly comic whose author is trans, so, that’s extra slimy. Also wow that “bone scans” bit is actually one I’ve never seen. Where the hell do they even get these ideas?

Also this one needs some setup. If you have time, this right here is a freaking journey, if not, I’ll try to summarize.

So a while ago, this one particular unhinged bigot decided the most productive way to spend all her time was to get in touch with a bulk sticker printing business and order thousands if not millions of these weird gross poorly framed slabs with a really crude drawing of a penis and bunch of gibberish she really wishes were the names of popular twitter hashtags that nobody else but her ever uses. And then after receiving these, just... wandering around the city she lives in all day every day plastering them on phone booths and power poles and the mirrors of bathrooms in like.. elementary schools and park benches, just everywhere. And then makes multiple passes a day apparently to make sure nobody has tried to remove any of them, as detailed in this amazing thread I’ll link again.

So the latest break in that particular saga is that same zealot going around plastering stickers like this around too, to make it seem like “both sides do it.”

It should be obvious that that’s a “blacks rule!” sort of fake between the baffling text and using the extra inclusive, particular emphasis on supporting people of color, general purpose LGBT+ flag, but also, like their fellows on 4chan, they plan this sort of “false flag” crap in broad daylight:

I should really properly credit the whistle-blowing on that particular oddity, and I should also note that aside from the breast milk sacks, this is all just stuff I saw TODAY catching up on my twitter feed, but my main point with all this is to illustrate that we really are dealing with Jack Chick/Westboro Baptist-level unhinged zealotry... but again, nobody’s out there pointing and laughing. And it turns out, when you don’t have people pointing and laughing at this sort of thing, you get people taking it seriously. So... when I went to quickly search for a news story to link with the bit about creeps barging in on women with cameras, the results I got were... this.

That... sure is a lot of stories about totally innocent people in a demographic I belong to being murdered by total strangers goaded into blind murderous hatred by the sort of people I’m pointing and laughing at! Ha ha! There’s a very real chance of that happening to me every time I step outside, for any reason! Tee hee! I live in a state of constant fear! Whoopsie!

And it’s not just stuff like that. The people posting these rambling tirades about “breast milk sack implants” and putting crude penis stickers everywhere, never being called out as the unhinged weirdos they are, either have the world turning a blind eye to all this crap, or have everything they do downplayed in the media to the point where outright sexual harassment, doxing, and slurs I don’t want to repeat get headlines like “so-and-so made comments that some fringe trans activists on the internet deem ‘possibly transphobic’” and that’s AT BEST. More often you get stuff like the one incident I managed to bring a lot of public attention to way back when, where some bigot just literally walked up to someone on the street, grabbed them, savagely beat the hell out of them until pulled apart, had friends film the whole thing, and bragged after the fact about it, and every story that appeared as a result claimed the assailant was the victim, because they were all written by her friends.

Face obscuring provided by me here, by the way.

And that isn’t a one-off incident. Because, see, most of these unhinged weirdos spewing out all this transphobic gibberish are not, as you would think, a bunch of barely educated Trump hat wearing members of some fringe religious congregation. They’re editors and producers in major British news outlets. This isn’t me shouting conspiracy nonsense either, this is well-documented. Like, The Guardian gets public internal protests over this crap. So does the BBC. Yes, other respected news sites cover this. Media watchdog groups do their best to reign this in with hearings and such, but, don’t actually have any power to enforce anything really. So when there’s “reporting” on this crap, it’s coming directly from the “breast milk sack implant” people. Oh and here’s some screenshots of the headlines of those stories you’re too lazy to click through and actually read:

And of course, sometimes when they want to really come across as respectful, they try to find “scientists” and “doctors” who back up their ravings but all they have to fall back on are disgraced quacks who spend most of their time on activism work to normalize pedophilia.

I’m not bringing that point about Cantor up to discredit his writings about trans people by the way. He doesn’t really HAVE any writings about trans people. He just pasted the names of a bunch of random studies from the 70s about whether playing with barbies makes you gay into his blog a few years back and this crowd was so desperate for validation they declared him an “expert in the field” and started passing out links to his.... pro-pedophila blog. Which is part of this whole pattern, but I’ve written about that before. Oh and the governments of multiple countries manage to treat all these people as “experts” and make policy decisions based on their ravings. That’s fun.

Anyway, aside from encouraging random people to, you know, just randomly murder anyone they see who looks like maybe a trans woman, every so often this weird little cult pulls in an actual celebrity who then has a public meltdown as they post all this gibberish to a wider audience. Currently this is going on with Harry Potter author J.K. Rowling (who’s actively promoting the pedophile guy up there on Twitter), and I think also William Shatner, but I haven’t really looked into it. The last big one though was Graham Linehan. Who you might remember from co-writing some sitcoms that were popular decades ago in Britain, or from being the weird cartoon villain who tried to kill the funding of a children’s charity, prompting this strange pledge drive marathon of Donkey Kong Country.

You might also know him as one of... I think honestly just two people who have ever managed to be such out of control stalking hate mongers that they were actually given a permanent no possible appeal ban from Twitter. Personally though I know him more as, you know, that one absolute creep who’s been obsessively stalking me for like 5 years and never shutting up about his weird personal obsession with me.

I WOULD link the recent freaking filmed interview he did where he spent forever rambling about me, but I’d have to actually watch it to confirm I had the right link, and also the only place I could quickly find a link to it would be on his twitter feed, which as stated, no longer exists. Oh and random side note there, despite being personally, by name, the person he was explicitly targeting all his hateful ramblings at, he wasn’t banned from that site for any of the disgusting stuff he said to me. He just slipped up and mentioned a cis woman with a professorship while shouting about this crap recently and that caused people to actually take action. I do so love being invisible.

Anyway, point is, prior to Rowling grabbing the baton from him as his social media presence went up in flames, this guy was name-dropping me a LOT. Presumably he still is, just in places fewer people see it. And when you have as big an audience as he did, and that audience is as full of hatemongers as his was, that has a pretty noticeable effect. I’ve been deluged with so much hateful garbage for so long it’s impossible for me to put any numbers on it. The closest I can do to quantify it is note that hate dump was big enough that I was also flooded with more weird messages intended as support from total strangers than I could deal with, totally losing access to social media feeds and my e-mail from the volume for a good bit, and THAT flood was big enough that I got this whole second wave of creepy stalkers who’d built up this whole weird fanon where this stalker here is like, someone I used to date or be business partners with and not just some creepy dude like twice my age stalking me over the internet, from a completely different hemisphere.

And I mean... in the broadest of strokes, I can kinda laugh all this off. Because... these people are completely ridiculous, out of touch with reality, and mostly live in other countries. But... all the threats and shouting are very real and very constant and like.. picture someone outside on the street shouting at your windows about how they’re going to break in and kill you. You really can’t ignore that. Even if they’re unarmed, and all they’re really capable of doing is shouting and pounding on your door, you can’t really just ignore that shouting and pounding and just watch a movie or play a game or write this article you promised would be done 3 months ago. You can certainly try, but a pretty big part of your brain is going to be occupied with thoughts about how maybe you should call someone to see if they’ll escort this violent person away, or maybe you should barricade your door in case all that pounding does something.

And I mean this isn’t a bad metaphor for how all the constant threats and stalking I’m dealing with thanks to celebrity bigots personally obsessed with me impacts my life, but it also does a pretty good job of describing how my night went pretty recently when I ACTUALLY DID HAVE SOMEONE POUNDING ON MY ACTUAL REAL PHYSICAL DOOR SHOUTING ABOUT STABBING ME TO DEATH, and no, there was no resolution to that beyond the sound of sirens causing that person to back off.

I also had an experience not too long ago where I was supposed to take a cab to a routine appointment, a car showed up with the cab company’s name on it, somewhat early, and proceeded to drive me... out to the middle of the freaking woods like an hour from where I live, and when my phone rang with my actual cab asking where I was the driver freaked out, had me get out of the car, and took off leaving me just... stuck in the middle of nowhere freezing to death and trying to find a landmark an actual cab could pick me up from. Still don’t know what the hell that whole thing was about and whether a cab driver just REALLY didn’t know what he was doing and panicked or what, but I do know that talking about it publicly in the vaguest of terms lead to a bunch of unhinged shouting from... apparently some unconnected ride share driver with a habit of dumping trans women between stops when they try to get medications or something, convinced I was calling him out for that.

So.... yeah. Things aren’t exactly going great in my neck of the woods. I’d really appreciate it if people would properly treat these unhinged violent weirdos like unhinged violent weirdos and not respectable members of society so they quit getting so bold and public with the violent stuff, and people who listen to them get properly shouted down for doing so.

[pens-swords-stuff]

WIP Blind Date [Writeblr Event]

WIP Blind Date is an event where we can discover new WIPs and find new people to read our writing! Sign-ups have already concluded, and it is too late to join now, sorry! If this is something you’re interested in, please let me know. If there’s enough interest, I’ll consider running it again.

This event is officially beginning, sorry for taking so long! Thank you so much to everyone who’s signed up, I hope you have a lot of fun.

Before we get started, please take a moment to read through everything in this post! It’s all important information, and I’ve done my best to make it easy to read.

A DISCLAIMER

It is possible that you will be assigned a WIP that you are already familiar with. I unfortunately have no way to know what WIPs you have read, and this was all assigned randomly. I apologize if it’s not a new WIP — even if it’s something you’ve read before, please reblog and review anyways!

TRIGGER WARNINGS

Every single WIP Blind Date Info post has details on any relevant trigger warnings. Please take a close look at them before diving in. If for any reason you cannot read your assigned WIP please DM me immediately! You do not have to justify yourself or anything — just let me know that you cannot read it.

You will be reassigned to read someone else’s WIP. Please don’t feel bad or feel like you’ll be a burden — this is what contingency readers are for, and they can take over to read your previously assigned WIP.

I cannot help you if you do not tell me, so let me know!

A SOFT DEADLINE OF ONE WEEK

Please try to get your review reblogged within one week. Today is July 6th. Please try to do so by July 13th.

If you cannot do it within a week, that’s okay — just let your partner know. If you’re uncomfortable with letting your partner know, feel free to let me know instead, and I can communicate it for you.

If your WIP Blind Date Info post has not been reblogged / reviewed and you have not heard from the person assigned to read your WIP by July 14th, please DM me.

Real life happens, and it’s completely understandable if you cannot get to it in a week — it’s okay, don’t feel bad. But communication is absolutely key, and it’s important that you reach out to either your assigned person, or me. Please don’t just disappear because you can’t make it in a week — it’s okay, just talk to us.

CONTINGENCY READERS

Thank you to everyone who has already volunteered to be a contingency reader! If there is a need for you to pick up another WIP or so, I will DM you and ask if you are willing to read a particular WIP.

Of course, it’s okay to say no! Whether it be time considerations or trigger warnings, please don’t hesitate to communicate freely to me.

I don’t know how many contingency readers I’ll need, so if you are interested in picking up another WIP to read, review and reblog, please look at this post!

REBLOGGING AND REVIEWING

In order to fulfill your requirement for this event, please reblog and review the WIP Blind Date Info post that you have been linked to. 

When you are looking to see if your blind date has reblogged and reviewed, please check your original WIP Blind Date Info post to see if they’ve done it.

Of course, you are allowed to reblog and/or review any individual posts you like in addition! But you must reblog and review the info post.

Look to see whether they’ve said yes or no to constructive criticism. If they said no, please refrain from giving criticism. Whatever reason that people would rather not receive criticism is valid, so please honor that. Compliment the good parts instead! If they said yes to constructive criticism, you are of course welcome to give it but it’s not a requirement. If you would rather not, that’s okay!

Use the tag #wip blind date!

Use this feedback form in your review. 

You must use the feedback form for the bare minimum of your review, but of course you can add as much other things as you’d like!

FEEDBACK FORM

General impression of WIP:

Favorite part of WIP:

A compliment about writing style:

Favorite character:

A post that I liked a lot:

What I’m looking forward to seeing next:

Anything else?:

Try to be as thorough as you can instead of just a few words per part. Elaborate, elaborate, elaborate! Tell us the why, not just the what!

SOME LAST THINGS...

For those of you who have a lot of links in your info post, please take a moment to highlight, bold, or otherwise identify some links that you would definitely like your blind date to check out and prioritize in case they cannot visit all of them.

If you have any general questions, please direct them to my ask box. For more specific inquiries about assignments, people not reviewing/reblogging or trigger warnings/concerns of any other kind, please DM me.

YOUR BLIND DATE ASSIGNMENTS

Click here to see a google spreadsheet for your assignment!

Please locate your tumblr URL on the left column. 

The links to your assigned date’s WIP Blind Date Info post is located in the next column over, right by your url!

Thanks for reading, I hope you have fun!

Please either like this post or comment on it (especially if you have a different main blog) to let me know that you’ve seen this post!

EDIT: Please reblog this post!!! People are not getting notified of being tagged, and it’s so important that everyone who signed up has seen this post. Please reblog to make sure the right people can see it!

@writingpantheon | @corishadowfang | @pen-in-hand | @kidsarentallwrite| @aloonycynic | @inkovert | @inexorableblob | @n1ghtcrwler | @vhum | @toboldlywrite | @rainy-rose | @sundaynightnovels | @sarcastic-razz | @inthewrite | @madammuffins | @muggle-writes | @kaatiba | @paperandredink | @nightmares-and-fireflies | @vicisse | @ink-flavored | @unloved-romantic | @insearchof-solace | @purpleshadows1989 | @tabbykatwrites | @the-real-rg | @the-children-of-the-stars | @starlitesymphony | @sunlight-and-starskies | @ravenpuffwriter | @rktho-writes | @wellsandsprings | @fair-folk-nonsense | @writersloth | @quilloftheclouds | @dove-actually | @fiama-l-hernandez | @owlsofstarlight | @frankensteinn | @matterovermindpodcast | @letswritefuriously | @esoteric-eclectic-eccentric | @ccwritesstuff | @velvetlighthouse | @fernyquotes | @me-between-the-lines | @marvel-and-writing | @converginglives | @jynecca | @cookiecuttercritter | @cassius-mortemer | @writingonesdreams | @milestogobeforeiwrite| @bookswritingandstuff | @bexminx | @maggie-wolff-writes | @hannahs-creations | @mywritingsinprogress | @codewritelove | @idreamtofreality | @royalbounties | @bogbodybitch | @coffehousecreations | @dahladahlabills | @lilylove22 | @jojoscoffeeandwriting | @chrysanthos-writes | @vmwatsonwriteblr | @roselinproductions | @elenajohansenauthor | @mslynnwrites | @mcubed35 | @minas-writing | @taohuawrites | @tiredbard | @leave-her-a-tome | @sassypandacandy | @aslanwrites | @bookenders | @bebewrites

[simminglena]

🌈 RAINBOW BERRY! LEGACY CHALLENGE

     – I love berry Sims! You too? I know, right...? Aren’t they just so cute?

     I’ve been considering for a good while whether to do a Berry Challenge or not, but while @lilsimsie already​ shared her Not So Berry Legacy Challenge with us, I couldn’t click with it for some reason.      So, I’ve decided to create my OWN version. It will be a mix of the Not So Berry with the original Legacy Challenge and choose some new rules for my own Rainbow Berry! Legacy Challenge (´｡• ◡ •｡`)ﾉﾞ ♡

     If you want to join me in this adventure, buckle up, my friend! Here’s what you need to know (= •ㅅ• =)

     NOTE: In order to fully enjoy the Challenge, you must own ALL PACKS! Also, YOU WILL NEED BERRY SKINTONES!           You can find some here:

          • Noodle’s 16 Pastel Skin Colors           • SimplySimblr’s 25 Shades of Berries           • Noodle’s 64 Berry Skin Colors           • TheSimsperience’s 63 Custom Skin Colors

» The Basics:

     You will be playing with your Sims up to the 10th Generation. The perk of this Challenge is that each Generation will be represented by a signature color, wherever applicable. However, it is possible to choose whether their hair/eyes/clothes match their signature color (and skintone) or not.

» Rules:

          ▪ Cheats are not allowed. The only exception is for the FreeRealEstate cheat when you move into your first home.

          ▪ Your starter Sim must be created using random genetics.             NOTE: It is possible to tweak him/her, as long as none of the game’s presets is used. Keep in mind that some of your Sims’ traits, aspirations and careers must be randomly chosen by a Scenario Generator.

          ▪ The first born will always be the heir for the next generation unless otherwise stated.

          ▪ Every generation must complete both the Career and Aspiration unless otherwise stated.

          ▪ Lifespan must be set to Normal. Don’t forget to always keep track of your Sims’ aging! 

     In case you wish to share your Berry homes on the Gallery, or just wish to share your progress with the Challenge, feel free to do so by using the #RainbowBerryLegacy tag!

Generations list under the cut!

» The Generations:

     There are 10 Generations:           » CORAL (Red)           » PUMPKIN (Orange)           » CITRUS (Yellow)           » JADE (Green)           » MINT (Aqua)           » INDIGO (Blue)           » PLUM (Purple)           » LILY (Lilac)           » BERRY (Pink)           » ASH (Gray)

     BONUS! » EBONY & IVORY (Black & White)

     Each Generation has a list of goals you must achieve before passing over to the next one. Never forget your trustworthy Scenario Generator, because you will need to use it several times through your Challenge.

🌈 Generation #1:  CORAL

Gender: x // Age: Young Adult // 2 traits: x // Aspiration: x // Career: x

     You are a fiery yet fun-loving young Sim with a liking for clubs and nightlife. You rarely make plans, and if you have to, you're most likely going to mess them up in order to follow your instinct. But you never give up, whatever result you get from your – sometimes reckless – decisions.

REQUIREMENT: Hot-headed trait.

» GOALS:

Get invited to a Club and become their leader;

Adopt a large dog;

Maximize Mischief and Dancing skills;

Have at least 5 lovers;

Get married and have one child after reaching the Adult phase.

🌈 Generation #2: PUMPKIN

Age: Young Adult // 2 traits: x // Aspiration: x

     You're almost never seen without a bright, wide smile plastered on your face, and if you’re gloomy, it’s most likely because your batch of cookies didn’t turn out the way you wanted. Your heart belongs to the kitchen – and your furry minions – and your mission is to make your neighborhood a little happier everyday with your bakery. As you always say: Good Food is Good Mood.

REQUIREMENT: Goofball trait.

» GOALS:

Adopt at least 3 red cats;

Maximize Cooking and Baking skills;

Unlock and learn all recipes;

Run a bakery;

Find love, marry and have 3 children before Elder phase

The first Male will be the heir for next Generation.

🌈 Generation #3: CITRUS

Age: Young Adult // 2 traits: x // Aspiration: x

     You are full of energy, with a big thing for gyms and good looks. You may be a bit narcissistic, but when it comes to your skills you’re so fond of yourself that you like to share your progress and enthusiasm all over the Social Networks. You're quite scatterbrained and perhaps a bit selfish, but overall, you’re a good noodle.

REQUIREMENT: Active trait.

» GOALS:

Social Media career;

Maximize Fitness and Videogaming skills;

Complete the Snow Globe and Postcards collection;

Propose to a childhood friend but leave her at the altar;

Get married to another sim and have at least 2 children before reaching the Adult phase.

The first Female will be the heir for next Generation.

🌈 Generation #4: JADE

Age: Young Adult // 1 trait: x // Aspiration: x // Career: x

     You must have been some kind of Flower Fairy in your past life. Everything concerning nature and its creatures is mesmerizing to you, to the point that you adore even the smallest flower and wish to live in extreme harmony with each living being surrounding you. 

REQUIREMENTS: Loves Outdoors and Vegetarian traits.

» GOALS:

Maximize Gardening, Fishing and Herbalism skills;

Own a Cowplant;

Join the Garden Gnomes Club and become their leader;

Complete Insect, Fish and Frog collections;

Marry a coworker and have one child before Elder stage.

🌈 Generation #5: MINT

Age: Young Adult // Traits: x // Aspiration: x

     You don’t quite share your mother’s interests. You believe in balance and good health. Your main focus – quite literally – is on human beings and the wondrous way the human body works, both physically and mentally. You’re extremely dedicated to your job... although you really enjoy your moments of relax.

REQUIREMENT: Doctor career.

» GOALS: 

Maximize Logic and Wellness skills;

Meditate and do Yoga at least twice a week;

Adopt a cat or a small dog;

Have 3 failed relationships before finding love with a Veterinary;

Never have children, but adopt a child before Elder stage.

🌈 Generation #6: INDIGO

Age: Young Adult // 2 traits: x // Aspiration: x

     Justice. There’s nothing that excites you more than investigate and solve crimes in order to punish those criminals. But your heart is a soft one, and at times one must consider and evaluate different paths before making their choice... heart or career? In your case, definitely heart.

REQUIREMENT: Good trait, Detective career.

» GOALS: 

Maximize Logic and Charisma skills;

Adopt a large dog;

Find love with a Criminal before level 7 of your career;

Quit career at level 7 and move to a different scenario;

Marry in secret and have four children. 

The first Male will be the heir for next Generation.

🌈 Generation #7: PLUM

Age: Young Adult // 2 traits: x // Aspiration: x

    Your brains crawl with questions. Quite literally. Why do we breathe oxygen? How many stars are beyond our sight? What’s Sixam, and what wonders does it hide? Your curiosity is what pushes you forward, and you’re determined to find the answer to all of your doubts! 

REQUIREMENT: Genius trait, Scientist career.

» GOALS:

Maximize Logic and Rocket Science skills;

Build a Rocket Ship;

Complete Alien, Geodes, Elements, Crystals and Space Rocks collections;

Have a relationship on the job before falling in love with an Alien;

Have two children before reaching the Adult phase.

🌈 Generation #8: LILY

Age: Young Adult // 2 traits: x // Aspiration: x  // Career: x

     There’s a gift in each of us, and deep within you there’s a star. Your truest passion lies in music, and you wish to make a living out of it. You may be a little frivolous, but you know what you want, and you know how to get it... don’t you?

REQUIREMENT: Music Lover trait.

» GOALS:

Maximize Singing and Guitar skills;

Write at least 25 songs and earn at least 50.000§ by singing;

Become a World Famous Celebrity;

Have an affair with an Actor;

Have 3 children from 3 different relationships.

🌈 Generation #9: BERRY

Age: Young Adult // 2 traits: x // Aspiration: x  // Career: x

     You may be born in the spotlight, but celebrity life is not all fun and games. Fun, however, are the many many colors that surround you as you paint. Creativity is your best form of expression... maybe you could also make a few extra simoleons out of it?

REQUIREMENT: Creative trait.

» GOALS:

Maximize Painting and Photography skills;

DIY — where possible — your own furniture and decorations;

Earn at least 50.000§ by painting;

Marry a Snob sim;

Divorce, remarry and have at least two children.

The first Female will be the heir of next Generation.

🌈 Generation #10: ASH

Age: Young Adult // 1 trait: x // Career: x

     Life is boring. So boring. Nobody is up to your standards, and the only places you find interesting are inside the books you read. In fact, you wish to belong somewhere else. Humans are ephemeral, empty shells. You want to become superior and immortal... like those mysterious creatures in your favourite books.

REQUIREMENT: Bookworm trait, Bestselling Author aspiration.

» GOALS:

Become a Vampire;

Maximize Writing and Vampire Lore skills;

Write at least 25 books and earn at least 50.000§ by writing;

Unlock all your Vampire Powers and become Grand Master;

Entice and marry Count Vladislaus;

BONUS: Have TWINS – you may cheat for this one!

🌈 BONUS Generation: EBONY & IVORY

Age: Toddler RANDOMIZE TRAITS + ASPIRATION FOR ONE TWIN, THEN CHOOSE THE OPPOSITES FOR THE OTHER.

     You two are the complete opposite of each other. To you, everything the other does is utterly nonsensical, and just gets on your nerves. And yet, how is it that you two just cannot have your own lives? Will this curse ever end? Maybe adulthood will finally let you part your ways... or reconcile with each other.

REQUIREMENT: The twins cannot part until the challenge is over.

» GOALS:

Maximize at least 3 skills;

Mess with each other until Teen phase;

One sibling must steal the other’s lover at least once;

Get the same part-time job during Teen phase;

Share the same room until Young Adult phase.

Will the siblings finally part? Will they reconcile? Choose your own ending!

     Thanks for reading this far! It may be cheesy and predictable at times, but I had a lot of fun writing this Challenge, so I’m excited to share it with you!

     I hope you’ll enjoy playing it as much as I do! So, good luck, and Happy Simming! ヽ(°´∀`°)ﾉ♪ .･:☆

     NOTE: REPOSTED, UPDATED FOR GET FAMOUS.

[tartlemelodica]

I am grateful for @scroogeislife​, who was the amazing person who made this post and to all who have contributed to the wonderful Mark Beaks headcanon. Without forgetting those who make this event possible, here goes the promised fanfic @justbirdfurrythings​.

A special thanks to @the-fire-kittys-main-blog​ who took time to translate this fanfic from Spanish to English. Thank you very much! I don't have words to say how happy I'm right now, you did an amazing work.

Title: Until I met you, (Yes I put the title of a song by Juan Gabriel, do not judge me).

Series: DuckTales 2017

Main Couple: GravesBeaks = Falcon Graves / Mark Beaks  

Classification: T

Genre: Humor / Romance / Hurt / Comfort

Original Version: Click here for Spanish version

________________________________________________

There were two types of people that Falcon Graves detested in the existential plane: the liars and the frivolous ones. Very few people have deceived him and left unharmed in the process, his oldest clients knew this so they avoided doing something that could arouse his anger. The transparency when dealing with the falcon was the first one, because although Graves’ work was illegal, he never acted under the subsoil. He always entered through the big door with his elegant suit made to measure and after a formal presentation with the motive of his visit, he went into action without deception, and everything was developed face to face without any blows to the back. As for frivolous people who were incapable of being serious about stuff, Falcon used to reject the jobs that involved having to deal with these type of individuals in particular, regardless of whether they were employers or possible victims of them; the simple idea of having to live with superficial beings who preferred to have fun rather than to work hard was something that made his insides burn.

If dealing with these types of people tested his tolerance, the combination of both types in a single entity made his tolerance disappear in a matter of seconds. ‘Why did I currently work for a person that fused both things perfectly?’ Oh yes, it was the handsome salary and benefits that Mark Beaks offered at the time or at least that’s what he repeated every day.   Now he was outside with the founder of Wattle who, without really wanting to, found new ways to his patience to the limit. The most recent way was related to the Technology and Innovation Convention of the current year based in one of the most luxurious hotels in the city. While Mark was in his lectures on the company's newest projects, Falcon would make rounds of the place to meet the potential competitors of Waddle and in due course take ideas that seemed to be the most promising to be "improved" in the near future.

What was the problem here? Well there was no problem related to their work; to him work was work and he accepted it. Graves’ displeasure came from the fact that the gray parrot was constantly harassing him to go to the private beach of the hotel a month before the event with the pretext of becoming familiar with the place. It was a torturous week of constant persecution and hundreds of text messages and voicemails on his mobile phone which ended with the falcon accepting, all provided that peace returned to his life, at least for a time before Mark Beak’s next whim.     

"Mr. Beaks is in talk with the number one tester, if you like, you can wait for him in the designated area in front of it," the hotel employee said pleasantly.

"Thank you," Graves said, knowingly reminding himself that this matter was going to take a long time.          

Minutes earlier in the hotel room Beaks had entered into a really absurd state of denial when he did not find his bathing suit among his belongings, leaving everything he had randomly packed in place. Graves did not understand how something like a simple vacation item could cause such a reaction in his boss, he acted even worse than the time he ran out of cell phones during his last visit to his private island.

Ten minutes became fifteen, then twenty, and eventually Falcon started to become aggravated. Surely Beaks was taking selfies with what swimsuits he liked so he could share it with his thousands of followers. The falcon really was not clear on how the young billionaire enjoyed the attention of complete strangers in social networks, however, if one this is for sure it’s that he hated people making him wait due to foreign shallowness.

"Excuse me," Graves spoke to the clerk who had previously spoke to him.

“What I can help you with?” the boy asked smiling.

“How many articles of clothing is Mr. Beaks trying on?” said Graves without stopping to looking in the direction of the test room where his boss was.

“You see, Mr. Beaks asked to try on all the swimsuits that would fit his size," the employee replied nervously, noticing that the man's face was beginning to show signs of anger.

“And how much is that?” asked Graves again, beginning to crack his fingers.

“That would be fourteen models ..., “ the employee started, still smiling as if that could lessen the storm that was coming.

"Well, that's not so much in reality," Falcon said, relaxing himself for a moment, though that would not last long, as he observed how the employee raising his index finger with the little bit of courage he had left. “From what I see there is something more to add?”

"Yes sir, I told you there are fourteen models, however, Mr. Beaks also asked for the respective color options of each requested swimsuit." the subject spoke to the point of fainting.

“And how many is that?” the falcon asked, waiting for an answer that would only end up making him lose his composure, but at this point he decided just to listen.

The poor fellow swallowed before finally having the courage to give the final result.

"Seventy outfits, sir," the boy finally said.

“What?! Seventy?!” Graves exclaimed, opening his eyes wide.

“Yes, it's right sir, anything else I can help you with?” expressed the employee, completely pale, automatically with the the phrase that he had memorized as part of his daily work at the hotel.

"No, I'll take care of it now," Graves answered, squeezing his beak in disgust.

“I think I'll take my rest now!” said the boy, fainting just after finishing the sentence.

Ignoring the man on the floor, Graves made his way to the wooden door of the dressing room. ‘What did that little inconsiderate parrot think? First he persecutes him incessantly to persuade him to live with him and when he achieves his goal he disappears. What a lack of consideration and respect for the time of others!’

“How much clothing are you going to try on in there?” asked the professional corporate saboteur, stifling the impulse to break down the door. He added, “Just choose something, for heaven's sake!”

"I just can not find something to help me," Mark said, excusing himself for his tardiness.

‘Something to help you?’ The comment seemed odd to Graves, but the discomfort he felt did not allow him to reflect on the intrinsic meaning of Beaks's words.

"Mr. Beaks, I've been out here for almost an hour!” the falcon exclaimed, trying to keep the volume in his voice.

“I know Gravesy, I heard you arrive” the youngest spoke with the relaxed tone that so displeased his companion.

“And he has the nerve to admit it!" exclaimed Falcon, clenching his fists hard before continuing. “Look, i forgive the fact that they conveniently gave us a double room to share.

"I told you that was a mistake at the hotel reception," Mark replied rhythmically, almost as if he were singing his response.

"And why did you not make a fuss over that? I thought things were always done your way?" said Graves, who had a good point.

“Yes, but we are not in Waddle. Here I have to keep up appearances." Beaks explained, in an attempt to convince the man who was waiting impatiently behind the door.

“Though I do that believe that is true, Sir can’t hack what ever you want!” said the older and forget the formalities added, “Mark Beaks, I'm tired, just put on whatever...!”

“Whatever!? How dare you suggest that!?” Beaks inquired irritably at that recommendation.

“Are you going to leave or not?” Falcon replied.

“No!”

This was the last thing the employee was willing to endure and I had to make it clear.

“If you do not open, I will go up to the room with a double bed, which according to you, we were given by a mistake of reception, I will take my things and I will go home. If I cross the main door of the hotel, you will not see me again, and forget about asking me to accompany you to any place outside working hours, do you understand?”

There was no answer. ‘I already had enough of Beaks's frivolousness at work as well as having to endure it in another environment.’ It seems his boss preferred to spend hours in front of a mirror with his cell phone in his hand, instead of spending time with real people that were there, and did not pay him extra for enduring his nonsense.

“Well then, I'll go!” said the muscular saboteur bluntly, stepping away from the place.

Mark managed to open the door only to see how Falcon's back disappeared from his field of vision and weakly whispered:

“Gravesy, do not go.”

________________________________________________

It was not very difficult to pack, unlike Beaks, Falcon had only brought what was dispensable for a three-day stay. Yes, that's right, the youngest member of the club of billionaires had convinced him to spend all that time with him and to top it all he was about to share the same bed for two whole nights, where his boss would take any carelessness excuse to take advantage of the situation.

“Wait, Graves!” exclaimed the youngest, hurrying into the room.

Graves looked at him out of the corner of his eye. The young founder of Waddle was agitated and with his shirt badly buttoned holding a small shopping bag his right hand.

“What the hell happened to you?” asked Graves, looking askance at his boss.

“Stairs…” replied Beaks still very much winded.

In the damned elevator had climbed an unsupervised child who pressed all the buttons and before having to spend a half hour visiting all floors, Beaks got off when he had the opportunity and used what was left of the strength in his legs to climb what remainder of his way to their. After all, Falcon was worth the effort.

"Has Mr. Beaks coming to say goodbye?" the falcon asked, still not looking at him. “Or to apologize?”

Mark did not really want Falcon to leave, but he was not sure if he could share with him some of the most painful passages of his life.

“No, I can not!” expressed the other with difficulty.

"Yes, it was clear to me," Graves said, frowning.

“Just give me a couple of minutes, right?” said the gray parrot, trying to catch his breath.

"I gave you one hour of my life outside that damn tester," said Falcon, slamming the suitcase with his belongings.

"It was not an hour, it was fifty-seven minutes," his boss clarified with shamelessness as if subtracting three minutes from Graves's long wait made a difference.

“Goodbye Mr. Beaks!” exclaimed the other, addressing the doorframe decisively.

The situation had escaped his hands, if the gray parrot did not do something Graves would leave and would never have another opportunity like today. He had to do something, even if it meant resuming the pain he had repressed for years and embracing himself to get enough courage. He finally shouted:

“I can not let them make fun of me!”

“What?” Falcon asked confused.

"Just give me a couple of minutes," said the gray parrot, and after a continuous deep sigh, "After that, you can leave if you want to.”

Seeing the glassy eyes of the younger, Falcon felt a twinge in his chest as if the pain that was eating Mark for a moment had transferred to his own psyche. ‘And for some unknown reason I wish that feeling would never be repeated. This was definitely not frivolity, much less a hoax.’

“Are you okay?” Graves asked in dismay.

“I will be when you let me show you,” answered the shorter one, trying to keep control of his emotions.

The falcon nodded and his companion entered the bathroom with the small shopping bag that until then had not had the greatest relevance. Graves began to despair, for reasons completely different from those of an hour ago: he was worried about Mark. For his consolation as the gray parrot promised him the wait on this occasion was short-lived.

"You can look now," Mark said, a little nervous.

Falcon was really surprised to see that Beaks was still hugging himself, although now his cheeks were flushed. He looked uneasy, had never seen him so vulnerable. He was only a swimming shorts with an opening that exposed the red and immaculate feathers of his tail and barely Graves felt this, he felt as if the savagery of his ancestors seized his sanity.

“Tell me bluntly Graves, I know I am ..." began the gray parrot, expecting a terrible criticism.

"The most beautiful thing I've seen," Graves added, enchanted by how attractive and suggestive Mark's rearguard was.

“But the feathers of my tail …” The parrot started still insecure, he is not used to positive comments about the part he usually hid from others.

“They are so exotic and sensual, believe me when I tell you that I'm trying hard not to make you mine on the bathroom floor.”

Falcon found enough willpower to run to the wash to get his face wet. ‘Curse! How did you let your thoughts turn into words?’ He quickly left the bathroom and stood by the bed, analyzing whether he should leave with his hotel stuff at that moment or wait for Beaks to punch him in the face.

“Gravesy …”

The taller one turned slowly only to find Mark with his eyes beginning to flood.

"Mr. Beaks?" Graves said, not even waiting for Beaks to launch himself into his manly chest.

It was a sea of ​​tears and it was then Falcon understood that Mark's affliction had nothing to do with what had just happened, this was something deeper, something that had managed to pepper his soul to the point of being a slave to an evil memory. He wrapped his arms around his thin body, hoping to calm him down a bit, but it did not help, Beaks was still trembling and the tears did not seem to subside. Falcon brought him closer to the warmth of his body and laying him down on the bed with him, began gently grooming the feathers on his head.

It was a touch so tender and delicate that Mark soon began to relax, it was almost like a sweet dream that the young man in his arms did not want to wake up, but he had to do so not to worry Graves. He was afraid to break again in front of the major if he tried to talk about an issue that obviously distressed him, so he chose the way that gave him the most security.

He took one of the backup cell phones he had in the first drawer of the mahogany bureau and wrote a message with surprising speed. Graves's trouser pocket vibrated instantly.

“You?” The taller one asked, although he already knew the answer.

Mark Beaks_10:35

‘When I was little the other children made fun because the feathers of my tail were a different color from the rest of my body, so I decided to hide it.’

“I get it. So did you went crazy when you realized you forgot to pack your swimsuit?”

Mark Beaks_10:36

‘I told you not to forget it, someone stole it!’

“Why would someone want to steal your swimsuit?” Graves asked wryly.

Mark Beaks_10:36

‘Hey, I have many fans! From this moment someone will be auctioning my shorts online.’

“Whatever you say, Mr. Beaks.”

Mark Beaks_10:36

‘Could you just call me Mark? I want you to stop being so formal with me, I mean all the time and not only when you're angry like a moment ago.’

"I'll try, Beaks," Falcon said truthfully.

Mark Beaks_10:37

‘Well, it's a start.’

"And you will not have more than that," Graves said, although deep down they both knew that could change one day.

Mark Beaks_10:37

‘It's okay. Returning to the subject I had never told anyone about this. And I was really terrified of going out with a swimsuit like the one I'm wearing if that meant being exposed to everyone's eyes. I could not stand being mocked, not again!’

"That will not happen again," declared Falcon with determination.

Mark Beaks_10:38

‘Why are you so sure?’

The face of the descendant of predators hardened and sinisterly sentenced:

“Because if someone dares to look at you contemptuously I'll use it as a punching bag until every bone in his pathetic body is fractured, no matter how much he pleads for mercy, I will not give him a truce and when he's done dust thinking that nothing in the world could go beyond his ordeal, I'll put a metal rod through him …”

“That's so romantic Gravesy!” Mark interrupted, pressing harder against the sculptor's chest.

"You must be the only person in the world who thinks something so horrible is romantic," Graves said, giving the thin bird in his arms a warm smile, glad to hear his irritating, tender voice again.

"Graves, can I ask you something else?” Mark asked to receive a slight nod from the one mentioned as a sign of approval. “Would you accompany me to the beach tomorrow? It will be easier if you are with me. I promise not to use the cell phone during the entire time we are away.”

"Sure," the falcon said briefly.

"Thank you Gravesy,"   Mark said, feeling more protected than ever.

“And so you to know, Beaks I would have accompanied you even if you were carrying your cell phone” Graves revealed smiling.

“Then I can retract?!” the younger asked excited.

“Do not! What’s said is said" Graves said, in front of a Mark Beaks who pouted and added, “Then since today we will not go to the beach, we can stay in our room watching movies and enjoying food all day”.

“Did you say our room?” The gray parrot asked, his eyes fully illuminated.

"Yes, that's what I said," said the falcon, and added, "Unless you're thinking of getting me another one when there's a vacancy left."

"Do not dream about that, Gravesy," Mark replied, making himself comfortable in Graves's arms. He knew that they had taken another step in relationship and that really made him happy.

________________________________________________

Meanwhile in the maintenance department of the hotel were a couple of scientists, working hard.

“We were lucky that they let us stay at the hotel in exchange for some maintenance work, are we not Dr. Gearloose?

“Of course not, this is humiliating! It's all the fault of those stinging vultures and their spending cuts!” Gyro exclaimed, without hiding his annoyance, he really detested those old birds and after a few seconds of uncomfortable silence added, "Where did Little Bulb go? He's supposed to be helping us here, that's what he believes it for.”

Just then the little helper robot jumped out of one of the ventilation ducts.

“Look Dr. Gearloose! There he is!” Crackshell-Cabrera exclaimed, who could not notice the way his direct boss rolled his eyes in annoyance instead of answering him.

“Where have you been all this time? I've been looking for you for hours!” the head of inventors said irritably to his little helper robot.  “What a little hygienic Little Bulb! Why are you bringing me someone's swimsuit?”

“Wait a moment Dr. Is it my imagination or those shorts have the Waddle logo?” Fenton asked, squinting to see better the garment that the creation of his boss had among his little ones his metallic hands.

"Not those fools, what's the Waddle logo going to be like," Gyro said, watching his assistant robot stretch the garment. “What the hell! Yes it is the Waddle logo!”

________________________________________________

TO BE CONTINUE?

The story of how this writing started swimming like a Drabble, legs came out to become Vignette, and after three days evolved into One-shot and maybe one day mute in a Fanfic is long, so I will not bore you with that. I'll just say this is the merger of the first three days of GravesBeaks Week, so it has a bit of everything, but not enough.

[rhetoricandlogic]

Threadbare - Andrew Seiple

Finished the -published book-version- of this webserial. The series consists of

Stuff and Nonsense

Sew You Want to Bear a Hero

The Right to Arm Bears

I’m linking a review I found on reddit because it reflects my thoughts really closely, except for the bit where the reviewer really really likes LitRPG as a genre; which I don’t. Or rather: only in some cases.

This is a very sweet and entertaining read without too much depth and/or philosophy, no background knowledge in whatever way required and since we’re not dealing with humans, everything concerning representation of any kind is completely out of the way; the worldbuilding mostly consists of toy golems, puppet haunters and a few fantasy creatures:

This is a litRPG with moderate ‘stats’ in the main text, it’s not as heavy as some of the LitRPG’s – as Threadbare explores his world, he will gain INT when he figures something out, or STR when he lifts something heavy. It goes along with the text and doesn’t bring me out of the moment all that much. Some people really hate stats in LitRPG’s, in this book they are moderately heavy for the first 15% of the book, light for the next 15%, and then scattered a little bit throughout the rest of the book. For me, it wasn’t bad at all.

In this world, people level up like they do in video games, but life wasn’t always like that – it happened about 40 years ago and no one really knows why.

You can only choose a set number of life skills, so choosing your profession in life is a big deal. Celia’s father is very hesitant to teach her new things like Cooking, because she could click “Accept new Profession” and be stuck with that choice for the rest of her life – and she’s only 11.

There are other races in this world, Dwarves are mentioned, and you get to meet a family of Orcs/half Orcs. Celia’s mentor in learning how to be a Scout has married an Orc woman and has a few sons.

Dungeons randomly spawn as well, and if a dungeon gets too dangerous people are sent to shut it down and destroy it. The dungeons can spawn very powerful monsters and they can wreak havoc on the small towns in the surrounding area.

Normal animals have also mutated, there are giant birds that can snatch small kids, there are giant and territorial Raccants which are mutated racoons.

You level up your skills faster if you’re presented with real danger, rather than just practicing, and almost everything has levels. At first, when this new system came into the world people thought it was a blessing… but as time went on they realized that they eventually maxed out on their leveling abilities… but the monsters kept going. It presented a real problem for a long time until people learned that by combining certain “professions” they could “unlock” new things and continue to level up.

Totally enjoyable. I highly recommend for absolute relaxation and not a single thought provoked.

[greyred]

3x3

Three appointments in three days. 

That’s how restoration begun. 

I was pretty down mentally and physically when I wrote my last entry. But I guess you gotta hit the bottom to start all over again. Life is like a funny computer game. I remember when I was a kiddo and loved playing Tetris, when levels got too easy, I would smash the blocks to bottom randomly before fixing them up, so the game would be more interesting, would give more tension, resistance. Thrill. My whole life have been seeking for thrills. Subconsciously. And now I don’t know any better. As with past weeks I managed to get my life back on track I also ended up picking up a new hobby that is definitely thrilling and highly dangerous. I’ve been past weeks sober, in order to balance my body and mind, but my soul has still life on it’s own. And now it feeds on speed and cars. Don’t get me wrong! I’m not talking about drugs! I’m back in zero-tolerance again as I’ve always been. I’m talking about speed that you can reach with driving a machine, an automobile. New friends, new hobbies. Right now there is nothing more thrilling than driving 200 km/h while being totally sober and feeling like you will have a heart attack any second. Or you will literally crash and be dead. Heh.. lucky i’m somewhat suicidal, so I don’t really care. But on those little seconds when you think ‘Oh MY God We gonna crash!’ in that small break in a second - I feel like I do want to live after all. Because the danger of death is as close to touch, it becomes a very real thing. And something you can not really control. Depends on a way you decide to take your own life you still have a backing up time. But not at a highway! And that pure sober adrenaline that I have been enjoying lately have oddly given me back a will to live.

Now going back on those 3x3 days when all this started. The satisfaction of accomplishment is one of the best depression cures. It’s not the pills (medication for depression like AD’s) that cure you, it’s your actions. It’s not how medicated zombie you are, it’s what you do with your time all in all. That’s why I don’t believe in pills. Essentially they’re just legal drugs. I believe in therapy. Fresh, powerful, motivating ideas and ways how to accomplish tasks in your life. Or how to simply enjoy little pleasures. It all starts from little things, you get up and do one, just one thing in your house that you have been postponing. The satisfaction will give you motivation to do more. It will come by it’s own. You just gotta give it a little push at first, to get the ball rolling. Eventually you get “high” on completing different obstacles that at first seemed impossible. First you get things done, secondly you boost up your mood and confidence and in the end you feel proud, guilt-free. Accomplishments. 

Sounds easy to say, right ? Let me tell you how I got my ball rolling. I knew I had appointments and responsibilities to follow, so I pulled my big-boy pants up and got myself outside. The scary outside, with people and places. Three places to be in one day, three days to follow. Everything on time. I executed them well, until it was an hour to meet a temporary social worker for my boring but important paperwork. Let’s say, sometimes you don’t click with another human being. And that’s that. This happens and it’s nothing to worry about. We don’t have to click with everyone. I think she might have lacked of social skills, because I got two panic attacks in her office, first one i dodged, the second one was unavoidable, so I had to leave the building at once. On my way back to home, counting minutes in metro, I got somehow frustrated about that unfortunate situation. I had still 2 appointment to follow after that one but I was fleeing home like a coward. Yes the understandable side of me accepted it. This happens, nothing to be anguished about, you can continue next day if needed. But I got frustrated because I felt like one unfortunate person in my day had ruined not only my mood but also my plans. And I love my plans. I love making lists, and following them strictly. How could I get the “high” of accomplishment if I will just let this happen and run away? As the metro drove in direction to home I suddenly got up and walked out. Not at my home stop. At the stop where was going to happen my next task. I was too mad to give up. I was rebelling! Rebelling against my own panic attack. Took all that anger and converted it into energy. Pure energy. Despite of awful weather, despite of panic attack and public & social anxiety, I was just a raw power that decided not to run, but fight back. And that’s how I accomplished the rest of the tasks. I did them one by one. I could have turned back to home any time I wanted, but I didn’t. With every step further, I gained more power. I was playing that life’s Computer Game with fury.

And in the end of the day I was yet again - proud of myself. It was all worth it. Perhaps that unpleasant person was a good thing after all. I try to find something good in bad moments. It sure was an efficient exercise served by life itself. And yes, there will be bad days where you don’t really feel like going anywhere and that’s fine too. But also there will be better days when you will have the strength to impress not only people around you but the most importantly - Yourself. One is sure, nothing will happen when you sit at home surrounded with your own haunting, overthinking demons. The most hardest thing to do with depression is going out, the most effective cure for depression is going out. I know the feeling of controversy. Yet.. No one will do and live your life other than yourself! Always, remember that.

What comes to my social life. If anyone can handle my sharp ups-and-downs right now being besides me then the Marine seem to be progressing in that area. Which is quite refreshing. I’m very used to the fact that it takes a few months for one to grow to know each other until you can see a person behind the mask. And I sure am one hard candy! Yet without words I feel how he really tries to understand me. We don’t have to talk about every little perspective and detail and a tail of the thought and idea as I’ve had to do in the past. It’s like a mutual understanding of each other. That’s something you can share only with a person who have seen life more than a regular bloke. Been in a long relationship as well. I’m glad he has kids from past relationship, because I sure will not reproduce. And I’m entirely aware that one day I still might fcuk this thing up. But I no longer live in the shadow of fear of that. I love the way how easy he makes everything. We just are. No restricting specific boundaries. All that corny nonsense that you have been copy-pasting from one person to another and in your brain you know it’s going to lead to nowhere. I am taking this one differently. Am lucky and grateful with a reasonable and understanding companionship. And enjoying while it lasts. And if one day shall be the last day, then that will be enjoyed in it’s full as well! 

You learn from mistakes. We all do. We educate ourselves with experiences and situations, with people and time. As we grow older we learn how to adapt and overcome. And the number of mistakes, which should rather be called lessons of life, varies from a person to person. We are all different. And that is okay. You should not race your life achievements with no one else than yourself. People in your life come and go, yearning for past will only do harm. Sometimes people come and stay, sometimes they leave, sometimes they are not worth of your time and energy. For instance I tried to stay friends with ex-bf, Sancho. I usually manage to break up in good terms. But sometimes it’s simply impossible. How ever tolerable I was with his quirks, he still managed to go full-psycho on me in the end and made it simply impossible to keep any communication in future. Sometimes I have to make a hard decision and just delete person from my life. As I have done it before. He played his cards himself, no one else to blame. And it’s not just that, it’s with everyone in your life. It’s acknowledging that your time and your energy is the highest value you own. And using and directing it in useful ways. My psychologist told me - I should be more selfish and learn how to say ‘No’. As I’m disastrously selfless when it comes to sharing my time with people. Sometimes I would promise to meet someone, or go somewhere just because I didn’t know how to refuse. And later suffer in all of my politeness. I think I’m getting better in not consenting the vibe. We should all be more selfish with our time. Only so little to spend in this chaotic planet. Shouldn’t we aim for complacency. And yet still be motivated to desire for more, progress, move on. Yet not to forget to stop time to time and feel and enjoy the achievements and little beautiful moments. For the life is never done, it’s never complete. It will keep on going with it’s beautiful chaotic ups-and-downs as it did before us and as it shall continue after us. Just like people come and go in your life, it’s just the same with the whole existence.

There’s miles to pass and I’m not in a hurry. Life changes in every second and for me personally it have been rich in colors, abundant in experiences, I’m curious where it will take me. And I’m happy to share my observations with my readers. 

I am once again in the verge of change. If that already hasn’t happened. I believe I have given a good push for this ball to start rolling. And I’m keen to pursue. The change comes when you want it for yourself because of yourself. I believe that is the most effective way. If you wish to change for someone else, then no matter how long you play this game - you will always be dependent of that person’s presence. Like I was once dependent of my ex-husband for so many years. Now after all those battles with life and myself I feel I have never been more independent like now. I’m able to fill my own tasks. And need no one to hold my hand. In past half year especially I have changed a lot, or maybe I should say - grown a lot. I am more selfish. And I will not drag anyone with me, nor shall i hitchhike on someone’s else’s back. I am what I am today. And tally with people and surroundings that make me feel home. That doesn’t mean one couldn’t obtain inspirations from other rooms. That is called healthy development, yes I just made up a new statement and agree with that thought of mine. I reflect and write about my own beliefs and views. I recognize and respect that people have different ways to create and cope. This right here is mine. 

--

Last night I saw a vivid dream that I saved the world. In this real life here, one should start with oneself. 

This time it started with 3 x 3 days. And have ever since multiplied. We’ll go up and down, and up and down. And heed every moment.

[equinoxparanormal]

12 Scientific Explanations behind Paranormal Phenomenon

We've all felt the uneasy, spine-tingling feeling that someone or something is watching us - be it an intruder, a ghost, or something far more sinister. And the truth is, scientific explanations for ghosts really don't mean much when you're overcome with that creepy-as-heck feeling in the middle of the night. All the logic in the world couldn't disprove what you already know: your house is probably haunted and some sage or holy water isn't going to cut it.

On the other hand, most of the time there really is a normal, logical explanation behind seemingly paranormal experiences. Even an apparent demonic possession can be explained pretty soundly with science (sorry, Lucifer). There's a real science behind haunted houses, and the reason our bodies sometimes feel on edge is usually kind of anticlimactic. Listen, no one is trying to tell you to buy property on top of an Indian burial ground anytime soon, but before you pack up all your belongings and move out of your haunted mansion in the middle of the night, you should really consider a couple of facts.

These scientific explanations for haunted houses may ease your mind, but you could still burn your Ouija board just in case.

Infrasound Makes You Feel like You're Being Watched

If you suddenly feel a sense of panic for no particular reason, it could be the result of infrasound - sounds that are too deep for humans to hear, but that we can still pick up on. Think of it like a dog whistle: we can't hear it, but dogs can. Does that make the sound any less real? Humans can only hear sound waves between 20 and 20,000 Hertz, but we can still feel the vibrations of everything else. This often manifests in the pits of our stomachs as strange, indescribable feelings. Ever feel awe-struck and happy for no reason? You can blame it on infrasound. The feeling depends entirely on the circumstances. If you're in a creepy house alone at night, you may feel panic rather than excitement.

Infrasound happens for a few reasons - storms, wind, weather, and the like. Even your kitchen refrigerator can emit them. This happened to be the case for Vic Tandy, a scientist who was convinced that his laboratory was haunted after seeing what he thought was a ghost. Tandy, a scientist and fencing enthusiast, eventually noticed that his fencing sword had been vibrating on its own, and then understood what had happened: A new fan he had installed in his lab was emitting vibrations of about 19 Hz. Since eyeballs have a resonant frequency of 20 Hz, when the fan vibrated his eye, it caused him to see shadows because his brain couldn't interpret what was happening. When he turned off the fan, all the ghosts went away.

Ghostly Orbs in Pictures Are Purely Camera Problems

Many of us want so badly to believe that those floating, glowing orbs in photos are real-life proof of ghosts. The problem is that while ghosts may be haunting every inch of your house, they're probably never going to let themselves be caught on film. Even real ghost believers are skeptical about orbs because they're usually just the result of a faulty camera.

Ever notice how orbs are mostly in flash photography? That’s because when a small bug or piece of dust gets caught in the flash, it reflects the light back - and since the camera doesn't have enough time to re-focus before the shutter clicks, it comes out like a blurry circle. There's also a high possibility that whatever paranormal photographer took the picture accidentally smudged the lens with his finger. Oops.

Automatism Makes Mediums Think They've Channeled Ghosts

How sad would it be to live in a world where a medium couldn't actually contact the dead? While some mediums are able to expose details so specific that they can't possibly come from anyone but your dead relative, a whole bunch of mediums are shams. The worst part, though, is that many of them really, actually believe they have a gift.

Mediums are often misguided by their spirit-channeling talents because of automatism, an altered state of conscious where people aren't aware of what they're saying or thinking. When mediums effectively clear their minds, readying themselves to be filled with other-worldly messages, they become filled with random ideas and images instead. Mediums often attribute this to channeling a spirit, but the reality is that it's all just random. It's the same science behind why your dreams are super strange, nonsensical, and sometimes super creepy.

A Mold Infestation Can Make Your Home Feel Haunted

Mold is a pretty boring answer to a really exciting - and terrifying - problem, but it's an answer nonetheless. Rather than burning some sage, you may want to invest in some quality bleach-based cleaners.

The reason you may feel terrified for no explicable reason, or suddenly see things that aren't there, could be because of toxic mold growing in your home. Research shows that certain molds have somewhat ghostly effects, causing irrational fear and even dementia. Whatever you do, don't spray the area with holy water, as dampness just helps mold thrive.

The Ideomotor Effect Causes Unexplained Things to Happen

Every little girl who has ever been to a sleepover probably used an Ouija board at some point. Some of our parents may have banned them from our homes, but for the rest of us, we enjoyed scaring ourselves by waiting for ghosts to communicate with us through a series of letters even more inconvenient than T9 texting. While it's definitely possible that a few odd-ball spirits have attached themselves to Hasbro's bestselling occult-themed toy, most of the time those messages can be attributed to the ideomotor effect. In fact, most scary sleepover games (hello, "Light as a Feather, Stiff as a Board") have no paranormal ties whatsoever.

Ideomotor action occurs when our muscles unconsciously move thanks to the power of suggestion. Basically, merely thinking about something wills it to happen. This was tested by physicist Michael Faraday who discovered that the tables used during a séance moved or appeared to levitate only because people expected them to do so. Once people expected a table to move, they unintentionally moved it. In 1853, this was tested in an experimental séance (where no ghosts were present). Half the people involved were told the table would move to the left, and half were told it would move to the right. As a result, the table didn't move at all.

Carbon Monoxide Poisoning Causes Ghostly Hallucinations

Strange voices, hearing things in your house rustle around, and even seeing ghostly shadowy figures can all be attributed to carbon monoxide poisoning - the notoriously slow, silent killer. According to a 1921 study in the American Journal of Ophthalmology, a family began experiencing strange, paranormal things when they moved into an old house. They heard strange noises and truly felt like they were being held down in bed by ghosts. The feeling of weakness was undeniable and so was their fear. The ghost turned out to be a faulty furnace that was seeping carbon monoxide throughout the entire home. As soon as the furnace was fixed, they never heard or saw anything weird again.

So, if you're feeling a ghostly presence, you may want to check your carbon monoxide detector. If that hasn't buzzed, you should probably move before you end up in The Conjuring.

Seeing Spooky Shadows? It's Probably Some Extra Electricity

It Follows was so scary mostly because we've all felt like we were being followed at some point. The shape-shifting, evil shadows that follow the main character around throughout the film didn't just haunt her house - they haunted her entire body. And once your whole body is haunted, you're kind of screwed.

In the real world, seeing shadow people has a pretty boring explanation: an excess of electricity in your brain. Swiss scientists tested this theory by electrically stimulating an epileptic patient's brain. After the quick shock, she saw a shadow person behind her copying all of her movements (just like in It Follows). She even claimed that the ghost grabbed her, but it turned out to be a miscommunication in the left temporoparietal junction of her brain - that's the part that helps you tell yourself apart from others, and in this case, it created a creepy duplicate.

Solar Winds Create Mysterious Ghosts

The earth is completely blanketed in magnetic fields. As a result, some places have stronger magnetic fields than others - and if you ask a paranormal investigator, they'll probably attribute that to ghosts. But if you ask a scientist, they'll definitely disagree.

The reason so many ghost encounters happen at night is actually because of the sun. The sun is constantly pushing solar winds towards the earth and these winds in turn push into the earth's electromagnetic field. During the night, you're faced away from the sun, so this causes the electromagnetic field to expand, which in turn, has a greater effect on our brains. We already know that an electric shock to the brain can cause hallucinations - this is a similar premise.

Drafts Close Doors, Make Things Move, and Make Us Feel Cold

Haunted houses always have a few hallmarks - doors randomly closing, things getting knocked off of shelves, and rooms suddenly getting filled with brisk, cold air. A ghost needs energy to move, so it sucks all the heat out of the room, uses it as fuel, and leaves behind cold spots, right? Sorry to break it to you, but no, it's just the weather.

Drafts entering through open windows, doors, or chimneys can cause some ghost-like things to happen. Cool air rises and hot air drops, so when outside air enters a room, it rushes around trying to equalize the temperature. This results in rooms randomly getting colder or slightly breezy. Many times drafts cause open doors to slam and lighter objects like paper and picture frames to blow off of shelves. If you feel like your body is suddenly getting colder, this could really just be from a lack of humidity - so go grab a sweater, you'll be fine.

Ions Are Actually Making Your Hair Stand on Edge, Not Ghosts

Many ghost hunters carry something called an ion counter, which literally counts the ions in the atmosphere. When that sucker goes off you know a ghost is taking a stroll nearby. However, ions are pretty natural - and they're the very reason you get an electric shock when you're wearing certain types of clothing.

Ions are caused by a ton of natural factors like weather, solar radiation, and radon gas. You can even buy ionic hair dryers that emit negative ions to help evaporate water faster. Ions have such a strong presence that they can even change our moods. Negative ions calm us, and positive ions give us headaches. If you live in a house filled with negative ions, you may feel tired and tense, but it's definitely not because of a ghost.

You Only Think a House Is Haunted Because Everyone Else Does

Have you ever noticed that you become increasingly aware of a problem once someone else points it out? The same can be said for a haunted house. Mass hysteria is a very real phenomenon, and one person's account of something can have you looking for signs that just aren't there.

This was proven in a 2014 study by Goldsmiths University of London where participants watched a video of an alleged psychic bending a key with his brain. Subjects were paired up with either a person who said they saw the key bend or a person who said they did not. Those sitting next to people who claimed to see the key bend were more likely to say they saw the key bend, too.

Quantum Mechanics Proves Ghosts Are Real

There are a ton of scientific explanations behind haunted houses that completely dispel the idea of them actually being haunted at all; however, what if science could prove ghosts actually do exist? Quantum mechanics is the study of the smallest types of matter, which some scientists believe make up the very foundation of ghosts.

Dr. Stuart Hameroff and physicist Roger Penrose believe that human consciousness comes from microtubules in our brain cells. These tubules are the very foundation of our souls. According to their theory, when people have near-death experiences those microtubules leave the brain and continue to exist (hence the idea of out-of-body experiences).

Another quantum physicist named Dr. Henry Stapp also believes this theory. He thinks a person's personality can exist as a mental entity after death (AKA as a ghost), and that if these entities can manage to pull themselves back into the physical world, things like channeling and possession can actually happen. So, maybe those mediums weren't making it up after all.

[Mariel Loveland, Ranker]

[bronzeflower]

Who The Fuck Writes A Ten-Page Rant?????

Also on ao3

Based on a post by @unintelligible-screaming

-----

Chapter 1: An Angry, Angry Rant

This was stupid.

That is exactly what you were thinking when you began watching this YouTuber’s videos at three in the morning.

Completely idiotic, you thought as you clicked on the next video.

  Past you was such a fucking idiot for even beginning to watch these videos, thus subjecting these steaming piles of shit videos. There was absolutely no reason to continue watching them.

  And yet, you were the one who decided to watch them, so you have abso-fucking-lutely no one to blame this on other than yourself.

  So, of course, you’re now watching some douche bag in shades eat an apple in slow motion and reviewing it in precise and exact detail in the most monotone voice you have ever heard in the entirety of your useless fucking existence.

  You watch as he bites into an apple with the speed of molasses. Even slower than molasses. What the fuck is slower than molasses? You tried looking it up, but all you got was where the phrase slower than molasses came from. When you returned to the video, he was still biting into the apple. The camera went super close up to him biting into the apple.

  After what was most certainly hours, he finally started chewing the bite he took of the apple. This lasted for fucking ages. You wouldn’t be surprised if he made this part extra slow for effect. In fact, you think he might actually have.

  He finished chewing, and he slowly opened his mouth to talk about that single bite of apple he had eaten.

  “This bite was slightly crunchier than the last bite.” He began, his voice at normal speed. “Juicer too. As absolutely perfect bite of an apple you could reasonably consider getting. Fucking amazing. This apple is amazing. It has nothing on the sweet, sweet nectar that is apple juice, but this apple is awesome in its own right.”

  He kept rambling on about the apple for so long that you barely even realized when the video ended. You close out of the seventeen minute long video of him reviewing a fucking apple of all things and click on another video where he was review… something. You weren't quite sure what it was, but i looked like a pile of sludge.

  He described it as slime, but it looked way thicker than any slime should ever look like.

  The more you watched his videos, the angrier you got until you got to the point where you were nothing but a ball of rage and exhaustion. In this state of rage and exhaustion, you figured out how to contact him and started typing away.

  “FIRST OF ALL, FUCK YOU. AND SECOND OF ALL, FUCK YOU. AND THIRD OF ALL, GUESS FUCKING WHAT? FUCK YOU. I’M SENDING YOU A METAPHORICAL MIDDLE FINGER. TWO, IN FACT. BOTH OF MY MIDDLE HAND STICKS ARE ERECT AND READY FOR YOUR VIEWING PLEASURE. IT’S A SHAME THAT I ONLY HAVE TWO HANDS BECAUSE THE RAGE I HAVE CANNOT PROPERLY BE  CONVEYED BY MERELY TWO MIDDLE FINGERS. IN FACT, EVEN IF I HAD DOUBLE OR TRIPLE THE AMOUNT OF HANDS, IT WOULD NOT EVEN HOLD A TENTH OF THE AMOUNT OF HATRED AND RAGE I HAVE FOR YOU AND YOUR CHANNEL. YOU HAVE SOMEHOW MANAGED TO BE THE CATALYST OF AN ENTIRELY DIFFERENT KIND OF RAGE THAN THE NORMAL PERSON HAS. IN FACT, THE RAGE YOU HAVE CREATED SURPASSES EVEN THE GODS IN MIGHT AND FURY, AND THE ONE WHO HAS OBTAINED THIS RAGE IS ME, A MERE MORTAL.

  “IT’S A FUCKING MIRACLE THAT I HAVEN’T EXPLODED DUE TO SHEER FUCKING RAGE. IF I DIE FROM SPONTANEOUS COMBUSTION, I HOPE YOU REALIZE THAT IT WAS YOUR FUCKING FAULT THAT I DIED. BECAUSE YOU INVOKED AN ANGER THAT SURPASSES WHATEVER GODS YOU BELIEVE IN, I WILL FUCKING EXPLODE LIKE A ROBOT WHO DECIDES TO RANDOMLY EXPLODE TO CONFUSE THE ENTIRETY OF PARADOX SPACE INTO FIXING EVERYTHING THAT OUR PATHETIC SPECIES HAVE DONE WRONG. BUT, OF COURSE, PARADOX SPACE COULD NEVER FIX EVERYTHING BECAUSE OF SOMETHING THAT IS SUPPOSEDLY ‘RANDOM’ BECAUSE PARADOX SPACE KNOWS EVERYTHING THAT IS GOING TO HAPPEN AND HAS HAPPENED AND IS CURRENTLY HAPPENING THROUGHOUT TIME AND SPACE AND ALTERNATE REALITIES, SO NOTHING IS EVER TRULY RANDOM, NOT EVEN YOUR POINTLESS AS FUCK CHANNEL THAT DOESN'T EVEN DO THINGS THAT AREN’T REVIEWING THE WEIRDEST OF THINGS.

  “WHO THE FUCK REVIEWS AN APPLE ANYWAYS? NO ONE GIVES A SHIT ABOUT THE COLOR OF THE APPLE AND THE EXACT WAY THE LIGHT REFLECTS OFF THE APPLE UNLESS YOU’RE BLINDER THAN A BAT. IT’S COMPLETELY UNNECESSARY TO DESCRIBE HOW THE SHAPE OF THE APPLE REMINDS YOU OF SOME ARBITRARY EVENT IN HISTORY OR HOW THE NONEXISTENT STEM MAKES YOU THINK OF MODERN-DAY POLITICS. ONE GIVES A SHIT HOW EACH BITE OF A N APPLE IS DIFFERENT FROM ONE ANOTHER AND WHICH BITES OF THE APPLE ARE MOST SIMILAR.

  “WHAT’S NEXT? ARE YOU GOING TO RAMBLE ON ABOUT HOW COMMUNISM RELATES TO A BACKPACK SHAPED LIKE YOUR FAVORITE POKÉMON? OR HOW THE WORLD WILL BE IMPACTED IF SOMEONE USES FRESH PASTA IN A BATTLE AND HOW THAT PIECE OF PASTA WILL LEAD TO WORLD WAR III? WHAT ARE YOU? A GODDAMNED HISTORY MAJOR? WELL, EXCUSE ME, MR. GOODHEAD, BUT NOT ALL OF US UNDERSTAND WHATEVER NONSENSE YOU’RE TALKING ABOUT.

  “IN FACT, IF, FOR ONCE, YOU WOULD JUST SHUT YOUR MOUTH AND SUFFER IN SILENCE, MAYBE, JUST MAYBE, PIGS WOULD FLY AND THE APOCALYPSE WOULD HAPPEN, AND WE WOULD ALL JUST HAVE A JOLLY GOOD DAY FOR ONCE. PERHAPS, IF YOU SILENCED YOURSELF FOR EVEN A SINGLE MINUTE, GOG WOULD COME OUT AND BLESS EVERY SINGLE PERSON ON THE PLANET WITH HIS GRACE. AND YOU WOULD GET THE GRAND FUCKING PRIZE BECAUSE YOU FINALLY MANAGED TO DO SOMETHING OTHER THAN RUN YOUR MOUTH FOR A FEW, PRECIOUS, GODLY SECONDS. IF YOU WERE QUIET FOR ONCE, BIRDS WOULD SING, AND THE ANGELS WOULD JOIN THEM, AND WIZARDS WOULD EXIST. BUT, OF COURSE, YOU APPEAR TO BE COMPLETELY INCAPABLE OF DOING ANYTHING OTHER THAN SPEAKING YOUR FUCKING HEAD OFF, SO ANY MIRACLES THAT COULD HAPPEN WON’T HAPPEN BECAUSE THE SEEMINGLY EASY TASK OF CLOSING YOUR MOUTH IS ENTIRELY TOO DIFFICULT FOR A PERSON LIKE YOU.”

 This message went on for several more pages before you hit the send button and promptly fell asleep.