#first time drawing doccy :3
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doccy's new and unfortunate obsession
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RIIIIIIIIIGHT SO.
I just finished chapter 13 of Dog At The Door and holy hot cross buns batman if you're not reading this fic you NEED to. It's literally one of the best written fics I have ever read in my life and I've been reading fanfiction for over 15 years, lol.
I went back and reread the entire fic to lead up to chapter 13 and I decided to treat it like I used to treat things I had to read in college so I took notes as I went and please I am warning you this post is incredibly long. Almost 3k words. PLEASE do not hit that "read more" button unless you're good with having to scroll past it all and also spoilers ahead. Proceed with caution.
~*~
Rereading Dog at the Door reactions (spoilers, obviously):
· Doc finding Ren’s body to be cold and for a second thinking he’s actually dead—my heart
· “That’s Ren, alive and kicking.” Oh…no, Doc. No it’s not.
· The first “Where is my hand?” hits different the second time through
· Gah the ice and winter imagery ALL over the place—my English degree brain wants to watch and see if that shifts to warmth at any point as we go? Thoughts for future Red to think.
· It’s fascinating to me to see Doc constantly thrust into the prey role. This is a guy who is very much not that person normally, but something about the Red King is beyond anything he’s really encountered before—or at least not since Dinnerbone—and it pushes him into an entirely new role that he clearly chafes in
· “I should get back to work on your new arm soon,” he says, making a mental note to add claws to the fingertips. Honestly Doc why tho. XD
· “It feels like something Ren would want him to do.” </3
· Side note: I just watched Doc’s freaking hour long shulker farm vid, and that’s making it a lot easier to hear his voice in this fic
· I’m more curious about the hand.” New Ren laughs a bit at his own words, as though there’s something funny about that phrasing. I MISSED THIS LINE THE FIRST TIME THROUGH
· The bead curtain being cursed hippie treasure XD
· The fact that Doc just so quickly accepts that Ren is gone—maybe not permanently, but at least for now—is kind of heartbreaking. Because you know he hasn’t really accepted it, he’s just… deciding not to feel anything about it. Just nod and move on and pretend you don’t need to stop and cope with the possible/probable death of your best friend and the fact that Someone Else is wearing his skin. That’s so sad.
· “high-fiving the finished hand with his own metal hand.” Aww… Doccy.
· “He shoos away the images of New Ren holding him up by the throat supervillain-style and turns around.” Hmmmmmmm want that fanart. Scary New Ren/RK is good stuff. (post-chapter-13 Red popping in with a WHAT THE HECK)
· “that makes him seem like a ghost in Ren’s body.” YA KNOW. LIKE HE IS.
· Okay side note time: why is the Red King here? Ya know? Like – in 3rdLife the idea of a possessing spirit of bloodlust makes some sense. But why stick around? Was RK trying to escape the 3L server, or was this not deliberate? At what point did he take over from Ren—at Black Heart Altar? In which case, was the whole idea Ren’s to begin with, or was he influenced? Maybe it happened the first time Ren died? The Red King took over then—or at least started to? Thoughts, thoughts, thoughts, thoughts…
· Wait more theories—what if RK is connected to the ????? entity that spoke to Martyn when he died? In which case, cMartyn said he was considering making that canonically a Watcher (he ended up not doing it, but he also didn’t do anything that contradicted it either). I’m not saying RK is a Watcher… but boy he sure does stare a lot, don’t he.
· Holding the screwdriver like a dagger—mmmm
· Okay funny thought: all this frost, RK’s gonna need to be real careful about rust lol. And straining the metal, tbh, all that freezing and thawing is going to have an effect but the rust idea is making me laugh
· Until I realized it would look like blood and it’s not funny anymore
· “Renbob is in the beanbag stuffed next to the driver’s seat” right so is this where Renbob sleeps because I have been wondering—
· “something about having two people look like Ren when neither of them are makes Doc stop to take a shaky breath” *sob*
· “Renbob clears his throat, looking up at Doc with a smile that is so obviously fake that it hurts.” Ugh the LOT of you stop repressing everything you’ll give yourselves a collective hernia
· “he’ll probably have to break the news to the other hermits, too, Iskall and False and all the others.” All these painful lines I somehow missed the first time through
· Awww warm air comes in when Renbob opens the door—with the flowers and everything, Renbob is so easily associated with spring, I love this contrast.
· Aaand there it is, yup, RK is shocked to see his face on Renbob, and Renbob is shocked to see that this is so clearly Not Ren.
· They both recover pretty quickly, though. Survivors, both of them.
· RK calls Renbob their “ferryman” and I’m not sure if I was supposed to get “crossing the river Styx” vibes from that But I Did. (does RK think he’s dead? That they’re all dead?) (post-chapter-13 Red here with a little bit of wordless screaming.) (and also a bit of pride that I picked up on this.)
· “And what a help you’ve been! Fixing me up, replacing my hand.” Hi yes, 911? there’s a dagger stabbed into my feels.
· “he’d rather remember rage than see another person’s heart break.” Dang that’s such a raw line. Oof.
· ”the Red King says, his voice hoarse with tears.” Really interesting that this blood deity can feel such emotions—like, anger or even fear, I can get. But to see this entity upset to the point of tears is fascinating.
· “There is a crown on Doc’s workbench.” Right, yeah so like—is RK unwillingly manifesting these artifacts? Because that’s wild, man. …how long before he manifests an “enchanter”?
· “I’ve never seen it [the crown] clean before.” Okay that definitely implies that maybe RK didn’t come around until after Black Heart Altar?
· “The Red King has the crown in his lap when Doc turns back around, claws gently tracing over the engravings, leaving frost patterns behind.” I really wish I had art skills because there’s this image in my head of a drawing of the crown held in RK’s hands, with his face (one eye glowing, one in shadow) reflected in the surface, and frost patterns following behind a claw that’s daintily tracing the surface. But I can’t draw so—
· RK asks for a change of clothes. What was he wearing when they rescued him, I wonder? The Red King outfit with the fur capelet? Or Ren’s Stargazer outfit? Which begs the question: where does Stargazer fit into all this? Was Ren’s return to Hermitcraft RK free, but when he came so close to dying to Sith, RK found that as a gateway to take over? (Post-13 Red here, Looking Intently at this note.)
· Awww… the image of a one-legged RK clutching new clothes to his chest and hopping down to change in the bathroom… That’s weirdly endearing. He’s less menacing when he stands up somehow. Less lurking, maybe.
· Oooohhhhh he messed up his back sleeping on the floor. Gotcha.
· Doc keeps telling himself (and RK) that saving him and working on these parts is “the right thing to do” and while he’s not WRONG I just want to see him realize that it’s not only the right thing, it’s realistically the only thing, because if he didn’t, then he’d have to deal with the fact that he’s lost his best friend and we can’t have that.
· “I don’t need to eat” ummmmmm no hold on this definitely implies that RK is possessing a dead body and I’m not okay with that where is Ren
· LOLOL “I can’t stand to see [you do] this” is such a raw line to be about watching Doc eat cereal with his hands
· “The voice doesn’t belong to who he thinks it does.” Ugh, Doc. This isn’t the first time he’s lost a close friend to Something Else, something otherworldly.
· “All of them are waiting for him, waiting for him to do something more, something better—” aaand there it is. Doc’s characterization in this fic in a single sentence.
· Doc waking up and thinking he’s seeing Ren and RK’s hesitation and the gentle “I’m not Ren”—OH MY HEART
· RK’s coffee = Renbob’s friendship bracelets
· Randomly can I just say that I love how RK’s dialog is all in italics? It concerned me at first because I thought it was going to keep pulling me out of the narrative, but instead it really just feels right. Also I’m looking forward to the moment when he says something and it’s not in italics because it’s REN and oh my lands please give this to me I beg you (post-13 Red here with a bit more mindless screaming)
· “watch your tongue with me, Atlas, because I’m the one person you can pass the sky to.” Okay okay okay—English studies brain coming out. This suggests that there is a burden RK and Doc can share: something Doc is currently struggling against that only RK can help him with. In the moment, I don’t know if this is really fair of RK to say—after all, Doc does technically have Renbob too, if we’re just talking about Doc’s unhealthy coping mechanisms. In fact, if that’s the context, then Renbob is a much better fellow-Atlas because he and Doc have known each other much longer and they’re both dealing with the loss of Ren. BUT, knowing about the upcoming conversation where Doc and RK both realize that they’ve lost someone (Ren for Doc, Martyn for RK) this line suddenly has a lot more weight. Again, I don’t think that in that moment RK quite has the right to pull this zinger. But in later context, it turns out to be true after all. They are the only two with this particular shared pain.
· Doc upset with himself because he can’t get over his “stupid hang-ups” DOC MY LAD. “I’ve lost my best friend, you’re in his body, and I don’t know how to process any of these emotions” is not a “stupid hang-up” PLEASE stop blaming yourself for everything!?
· “I’m so tired” in the middle of his nightmare—oh my gosh. That hurts so much for some reason.
· I also very much wish I had the ability to draw the image of Doc with tears on his face, staring dead-eyed down at his workbench while RK looms over from behind, pinning his wrists to the table with one metal arm and one frost-bitten one, a look of exasperation and concern on his face. Why can’t I draw the things
· “How do you know Etho” “I watched him die.” OW ow ow ow ow
· Doc takes this as calmly as only someone used to living in a world where death has low consequences can. Oh. Oh—that means… huh. Doc isn’t used to losing people permanently on any basis, especially not death. So no wonder he doesn’t know how to process Ren being gone (I can’t bear to write “dead” there). He literally doesn’t have context for it… and what context he DOES have is like—I mean, Etho and Bdubs came back. Ouch.
· “Twenty-five.” The Red King makes the number sound like a threat. Yet another banger line I missed the first time through. Imagine waking up and thinking you’re in 3rd Life again but instead of 14 players there’s almost twice that many and you think you don’t know any of them.
· I still don’t quite understand the “when was etho added/should have known there was something different” bit or why RK is so emotional about it… but I have trust that it’ll make sense at some point. (post-13 Red: ...is this something about the fact that he thinks he's dead...so he thinks Etho has died before? Like, that 3rd Life wasn't Etho's first hardcore? ...I feel like I'm almost grasping this but I'm missing an element somewhere.)
· And now a sword. RK. My man. You need to stop manifesting things—especially when they scare the ever-living daylights out of you.
· I absolutely adore the in-universe lore that Fire Aspect is a PvP enchantment because it threatens dropped loot, and yeah I very well might steal that. (Along with something I read at one point who-even-knows-where that Knockback is a coward’s enchantment, because I love that too.)
· He really shouldn’t. / Doc picks up the sword by the scabbard and hands it to him, hilt extended. Doc you already trust this guy so much and you don’t even know it—but is it just because you still subconsciously trust the face he wears? Or is it something deeper?
· Ugh, the “I was supposed to kill someone for him” conversation/scene is SO FREAKING GOOD
· “I don’t want it. Not like the crown.” Why, though? Why doesn’t he want it? Because it’s more to do with death than kingship? OH. Oh, I hadn’t even considered that. I’ve been thinking of RK as this like, god of blood and vengeance but maybe he’s not. Maybe he hates the bloodshed (“the blood! It’s drippin’ in me eyes… I’ve been blinded by the violence…”) just as much—more?—than Ren did/would have. Huh. That’s a new facet.
· Oh my heart the “have you ever lost someone and it was your fault” line. Dagger to the feels. Dagger to the feels.
· This like… “I’m on a roll and even though I know I should stop I really don’t want to” mode? Man. That’s relatable. Especially when you’re working to avoid dealing with something else.
· “Not making it for you—it’s for Ren” oh ouch ouch ouch the denial suddenly breaks through it’s okay, Doc I’m with you on this
· The second time reading through it’s far clearer that Doc has a blind panic attack here—when he starts rambling that Ren’s coming back, he’ll be there for season eight and RK goes to…do whatever he was going to do and Doc just blanks out. The manic productivity should have been a warning sign, the poor guy is crumbling.
· “Doctor” and “he’s not sure he deserves that title right now” UGH Doc needs a hug someone please hug him and tell him it’s all going to be okay. Someone please hug me and tell me it’s all going to be okay.
· “his hand on his throat” over the scar from the Red Winter axe? </3
· “I did do that. I have done that.” RK admitting to it actually having been him in Doc’s nightmares?
· Okay sorry the conversation about beating Dinnerbone will never not be funny to me
· RK mentions that people used to call him m’lord or Ren, and then mere minutes later you have “Ren. You couldn’t save him because of me, could you?” He knows exactly what’s going on here. Not maliciously, but he’s no dense-head, he’s put the pieces together. (post-13 Red: MOST of the pieces. Most of them.)
· Watching Doc slowly stop fighting his nightmares—like, the first time, he fights. The second time, he accepts it but still struggles. And this time… this time he gives up before it even starts. That hurts, man.
· Good grief the whole “get my head chopped off” / “you really don’t want that” bit. O.O I’m not sure what emotion I’m feeling but I’m Feeling An Emotion.
· “Snow’s new. Dream’s not.” </3
· …Doc’s not gonna be a fan of snowier-snow after this trip…
· "Dr. M77" Actually he’s Doc Monster, RK, but we’ll let it go. XD
· OKAY BUT THIS EXCHANGE? The “how are you feeling” / “better” / “you’re a bad liar” / “I said better not great” that’s such a good exchange and I don’t know why every other time I’ve ever seen it used they stop at the lying accusation? Doc with the snappy comebacks, man.
· Aaah, Doc and RK, two establishment bros bonding over a shared disdain for hippies.
· The bit about the fella who wore an iron helmet and called it a powdered wig—fear is in my heart. *shoves Scar into an obsidian box and blocks it closed*
· “Who was Ren to you?” </3
· Doc is more than willing to spread the flames, to sear his loss into RK’s bones. / The king’s face stops him. Ren’s face stops him. Holy CRAP is that a good set of lines. So much going on there, and ALL of it good.
· Again. I wish I could draw. I would draw RK sitting on the edge of the bed, gently hugging a collapsed-in-on-himself Doc. </3
· “And I hate the devil that forced us apart, that mixed my blood with his.” *adds another layer to Scar’s obsidian fort*
· OKAY STARTING CHAPTER THIRTEEN I made the mistake of logging into Tumblr earlier and saw people screaming so I’m sure I’m not ready for this but here we go
· Oh no RK has been hippie-ified
· “You started a paramilitary organization because you have hay fever?” *dies laughing*
· Ugh I need to go back and watch s6 I’ve only seen the tail end of Mumbo’s side of things and there’s so much I don’t know.
· HAHAHAHAH I do know the trident bit though—
· Wait he said Scar
· PANIC
· “Kingslayer. bloodthirsty. Time King. The coward. And the mastermind behind it all, the loyal soldier to the very end, the whole damn reason either of us are in this mess.”
· HOLY CRAP HOLY CRAP HOLY—
· “Is this the afterlife I deserve? After everything, this is the hell I’m going to endure?” I AM SCREAMING
· Doc pinned to the wall with ice, struggling to breathe—I CAN’T WHAT IS HAPPENING
· ((You know I’d get through this a lot faster if I stopped pausing to write reactions—))
· “A break in the ice. A whisper of spring.” Symbolism. Symbolism.
· “Ren was dead when I found him again,” NO I REFUSE TO READ THIS
· “don’t use the hand I built you to hurt yourself” DOC. SIR. MY HEART.
· RK don't run, RK get back here—what are you—
·
·
· I
· JUST
· ACTUALLY
· SCREAMED
· AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA
· *several long moments of just breathing*
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·
·
· *rereads*
· Holy crap on a garbage cracker with an extra serving of what-the-heck sauce
· REN
· REN
· Okay lol okay hahaha calming down
· I literally threw myself back in my chair away from the computer reading that last paragraph. I don't usually... physically react to things I read. LOL. Heh. I’m. Ah. I’m not emotionally invested in this or anything.
· Holy crap.
· Okay. Okay. Okay.
· Um.
· Great chapter, guys. Awesome stuff. Really good. I’m absolutely okay right now and it’s all totally fine.
· …please enjoy your break and get lots of rest and I very much look forward to the return of this fic you have no idea.
· I need to go breathe for a little bit.
EDIT: no, you know what--I'm not going to be a nice polite fangirl over here and quietly hope y'all see this I'm straight up tagging you, @fluffy-papaya and @betweenlands. THANK YOU but also how dare.
#The only reason I'm even posting this is for my own remembering later#and i guess if fluffy or solar want to see my mindless ramblings -- go nuts#long post#redwinterreacts#redwintertalks#dog at the door
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You're welcome =3 But um, sorry. I don't know why my Tumblr app cut it off but there was also suppose to be a question to my ask too =? It was about how did you come up with creating a sweet bean dip like Doccy? =P
Ah. Well...
During one of Doc's recent streams, a veiwer by the name of Ssleepyflowers called Doc 'Docy' in chat, in which Doc replied it sounded cute.
https://clips.twitch.tv/ArtsyHorriblePigeonNerfRedBlaster
People are a sucker for cute things, me included of course, so with this acknowledgement people took to it like a wildfire.
https://clips.twitch.tv/NastyBrainyMoonTriHard
https://clips.twitch.tv/MagnificentNurturingWoodpeckerSMOrc
And thus the idea of "cute little Doccy" was born.
Next stream, Doc was chatting with us about possible merch ideas. Enter me, a gremlin that was taken by the idea of Doccy, and brave enough to suggest Plushies.
https://clips.twitch.tv/EsteemedTubularWebWoofer
It seems plushies were a thing loads of people wanted. And somehow "Doccy" became the name of said plushy. (Not sure that Doc knew what we meant at first though lol)
So now that Doccy had a name and a face, it was only a matter of time before I drew him. After all, I'm unable to draw anything that isn't cute, even normal sized Doc. And thus the smol boi was born.
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