#fighting the urge to yap so hard

[toasterdrake]

"No offense, but you're the last person I expected to see."

Dimples impressing her cheeks, Yasmina was still smiling, so Robin didn't take offense, shrugging instead. "Then my surprise worked." The charismatic grin she wore softened into a real smile. "It's good to see you, Yaz."

"Hell, you too." Yasmina tugged her back in for a stronger hug, hands folding firmly into the leather of her jacket. "You have no idea," she added quietly, voice muffled by her place nestled in the crook of Robin's neck.

writing their reunion in oasis got me like

bonus bc theyre cringe losers:

if anyones wondering yeah yaz does punch robin. are we surprised?

[starvrat]

what is it about certain fictional men that makes me want to refer to them with she/her pronouns

[science-hoes]

Michael Robinavitch + Spicy Polaroids on Your Wedding Day

Robby is anxious on your wedding day, and you knew he would be. You knew he would rub his neck raw with his calloused hands, pace back and forth in his tailored tuxedo, nearly strangle Jack for yapping his ear off in an effort to calm him down.

You knew your almost-husband better than you knew yourself. That’s why you devised a plan with your bridesmaids to help distract him.

Samira is the first to visit him and the other groomsmen. She uses Jack as an excuse for her presence, fixing his bow tie and making sure his socks were solid black. But before she leaves, she spots Robby staring out the window, opening and closing his hands at his side. She gives him a hug of reassurance, tells him he looks nice, then slips a small item in the pocket of his tux jacket before leaving. With a raised eyebrow, Robby carefully pulls it out. A small square with…

Oh.

Oh.

A Polaroid picture of you in white, lacy lingerie. Grabbing your breast, squishing them together, mouth open in dramatic bliss.

Holy fuck.

Robby’s face turns deep crimson within seconds. He thinks that he’ll faint if he looks at the photo any longer and have an untimely accident in his boxers. He shoves it deep in his tux pocket again, but his groomsmen don’t miss the damning flush across his face.

“Need some water, Rob?” Jack asks from where he stands near the door.

Robby swallows hard and nods. “Yeah, I think so.” He barely squeaks out.

The next bridesmaid to enter the room is Santos. It’s under the guise of reminding the groomsmen that the photographer will arrive soon for group pictures. Robby is sipping his water slowly, trying to shake that Polaroid out of his head. You looked so perfect, so beautiful, so soft, so-

“You alright, Cap?” Santos asks, arms crossed.

Robby smiles and nods. “I’m fine.” Lie.

Santos raises an eyebrow, eyeing the white corner of the Polaroid slightly sticking out of his tux pocket. She flips out a second Polaroid, in between her fingers like a cigarette.

“This might help take off the edge.” She transfers the small picture to his grasp before walking out.

Robby chokes on his water this time. You’re laying on the mattress, chest down, ass up, the white lingerie squeezing in the best places, your eyes gazing into the camera. He’s seen you in that position so many times, but never at this angle. He thinks he might actually die before he can say his vows to you.

Langdon comes up to slap Robby on the back, knocking the stray water out of his lungs. Robby quickly conceals the Polaroid, hiding it with the first one. Now, he has a fucking stash.

The next one comes from Ellis. She’s the one who helps lead Robby to the rooftop for your first look. His hands are trembling, his heart is beating far too fast and probably out of sinus rhythm, his breaths are staggered. But the night shift resident just grabs him by the shoulders.

“Robby, breathe. She’s almost here. You’re gonna feel better when you see her.” Ellis does her best to calm him.

Robby opens his mouth to speak but can only nod. He is fighting the urge to run his hands through his perfectly combed and neat hair. Ellis smirks and flashes a Polaroid in front of his eyes.

“Use this in the mean time.” She says, shoving it in his hands before prancing away to help you with the train of your dress.

This Polaroid featured you, suddenly bare of the gorgeous white lingerie from the previous two photos, hands covering your nipples, your thighs angled just enough to hide your pussy, your hair splayed around a pillow.

Robby nearly falls to his knees. Thank God he listened to Jack’s advice of wearing compression shorts, or else these first look photos would have to be from the waist up. Hopefully, the photographer you booked can photoshop his skin back to a normal color instead of the beat red that crawled up his neck.

When you finally tap his shoulder, beckoning your fiance to turn around, Robby wastes no time to see you. You look like a dream. The beautiful white dress, the elegant veil, the gorgeous cascade of flowers in your hands. His entire future right before his eyes. It’s all too much, and the tears fall fast.

Robby pulls you close, impossibly tight, trying not to ruin your hair and makeup. Whispering his love for you in your ear, trying to catch his breath before his tears turn into uncontrollable sobs. Your eyes are watering, and you try to ground yourself by squeezing his neck tighter.

“‘M sorry for being such a mess.” He breathes with a laugh. “Just been waiting for this all day.”

You nod, breathing in the cologne you loved so much, the one he picked just for your wedding day. “Me too. The only person who can calm me down is the only person I wasn’t allowed to see.” You giggle to mask a cry.

Robby pulls away to look at you, using a large thumb to brush away the tear that rolls down your cheek. “Oh, God, you’re so beautiful.” He says before pulling you close for a kiss.

You smile into the kiss, enjoying the warmth of his lips on yours. “Me? Look at you, Doctor Robinavitch. You clean up pretty nice.” You tease.

Robby chuckles and pinches your side. “Hey, at least we’re out of scrubs, yeah?” He jokes along with you.

You pull away from his embrace to take a full look at him, never letting go of his hands though. You spy the Polaroids, your gifts to him, tucked into his tux pocket. A devilish smirk pulls at your mouth.

“Did you like the pictures?” You ask.

Robby freezes for a moment. The pictures. From the moment he saw you in your dress, his mind was only filled with love and joy and your future together. But now he was being lured back to a darker, sinful place.

“You little minx.” He hisses lowly, but his smile betrays him.

You shrug innocently and pull one last Polaroid out from the pocket (yes, it has pockets!!) of your wedding dress.

“Maybe this will hold you over until tonight?” You suggest.

Robby takes the Polaroid from you, and he lets out a pathetic moan that turns into a chuckle. You’re laying on the bed, hiding nothing, your fingers inside your wet pussy, your mouth sucking on one of your own tits. He can feel himself straining against those compression shorts, and his mind starts fantasizing about all the ways he is going to take you apart tonight.

“Jesus, kid.” He manages to croak. “Who took this?”

You giggle and take the photo from his hands, slotting it into his pocket with the rest of his collection. “Self-timer.” You answer.

Robby swallows thickly and grabs your hips, not too tight because the photographer is still snapping photos from a distance. “And where did you get that pretty white thing?” He questions lowly.

You press a sweet kiss to his lips, reveling in the way a hot, frustrated huff leaves his nostrils and fans across your face. “Had it made. Just for you.”

“Just for me?”

“Mmhmm.”

Robby shakes his head with a grin, feeling younger than he has in years. “What am I gonna do with you?”

Though the question is rhetorical, you can’t help yourself from teasing him further. “Just wait until you see what I’m wearing under this.”

Later that night, when Robby slowly undresses you, his wife, he’s met with that same white lingerie set that had been taunting him all day. No longer in a tiny Polaroid frame, he can trace every single lacy detail, down to the panties, where you had the seamstress embroider the word “Michael” right above the bikini line.

[eternallyei]

smut, men x reader

Thinking about men who consider themselves your best friend until the moment they get horny.

Spending their precious time with you, laughing and talking about whatsoever, living his peaceful and lovely life before they catch themselves staring.

They get randomly flustered at the thought of you figuring out their thoughts while you just lay there on his little room’s bed, yapping as usual.

Cheeks flushing red as they close their eyes to suppress the lewd images of them stuffing you full of their dick, cum dripping out of your hole to wet the sheets. He shakes his head.

“hey.. you listening?”

“I- Oh.. yeah yeah, I’m sorry..”

He nods, adjusting back on his chair, his calloused hands join over his cock in an attempt to hide the aching boner growing in his boxer.

He always tend to get lost in the thoughts of feeling your hole clench and spasm around his length.

Denial and fight is his daily routine around you, he just can’t resist you but you’re just friends, best friends at most, right.. ?

God, if only you knew how hard he tries to fight the urge to moan your name when you’re on a call with him. Because yes, you spend your whole life together, it’s all the more hard to think about anything else but you.

He loves listening to your voice but it’s so hard to contain himself for so long that barely even ten minutes after you get on the call, he mutes himself. Lowering his sweatpants and boxer, his cock twitching in his hand when you sigh or innocently whine about your day.

If only he could have at least a taste of you, his gaze eating you up from the moment they leave your eyes and roam over the sight of you. You and the way you speak, while your whole body explains every senses that were awakened when the story happened.

How your lips curl into syllables through your speech, your neck looking oh-so markable along the way your adam’s apple moves when you gulp down the saliva all those words have been building. All that saliva that should be dripping down your chin as he fills your sweet talkative mouth up.

It’s not his fault if your clothes tighten so well around your curves, it shows everything yet not enough of what he needs to see. His heart screaming to rip everything off you and taste you.. and feel you.. and.. fill you.

“Hey, are you okay ? your pant’s wet..”

Maybe staring at you for too long wasn’t a good idea, he knows. But who could’ve believed he could cum just by looking at your sweet and lovely figure..

— CHŌSO caleb Gale Jinshi ARMIN kyo BOKUTO —

— AND ANY OF YOUR FAVS ♡

this has been left in my drafts for a while and it is time for it to be aired so i hope you guys like it~

likes, rb and comments are appreciated, thank you lovelies ♡

@eternallyei. please do not copy/translate/use as your own.

[ablobwhowrites]

https://www.tumblr.com/ablobwhowrites/777791359957532672/hear-me-out-on-this-yandere-crk-ramble-guys?source=share

Sorry if this is annoying but idea to add onto yap since I love it so much it activated my 'I want to make ideas based off this...'

The moment the cookies get y/n to the other side...y/n is shocked at first but next thing they know...the cookies are spoiling y/n and taking complete care of them. Massages often to work out stress, having y/n just relax all day instead of work, kid cookies loving to hang out with y/n to color in coloring books with then or playing games with them...and when y/n has that office work instinct...to do paperwork and stuff...cookies work on that so fast...lol!

(this is going to happen in some time as the cookies are trying to find a way to get y/n into their world. And y/n is oblivious to it rn)

Y/n would be reluctant to rest. They would bascially have to have every single strongest cookie in earthbread to make them take one single rest day as everyday they have a need to do something. Cause trust me if y/n told the cookies that y/n is a workaholic, always having a urge to get things done and without fail y/n will secretly try to get more work done because it's due in two weeks and the work is just to send it in but y/n wants to redo the whole thing because they see one mistake on a paragraph and now y/n is forced to under one of the cookies watch because of y/n's tendency to forget to sleep or eat or anything except to work.

But when y/n finally decides to rest instead of working, y/n doesn't know how to really relax as when they do it's weird to them because what if someone needs help or if work needs to get done then what would happen if they don't. They really act like it's going to be that important but it's really not. Also the beast trying to steal y/n back to their domains kinda freaks out y/n so they mostly try to stay away from them. I do imagine y/n not being able to walk around in their new form became of cookies being flat so it's hard for them to go around places for right now so some cookies help out y/n to walk around because y/n will fall flat on their face again like last time. Dr bones of course is a worrywart about y/n's health after being transported to the cookies world so some daily checkups are made by them. Plus y/n is kinda a celebrity now on earthbread and off earthbread because like they are the baker and seeings that they are actually nice and friendly makes them really really popular.

Choco Werehound Brute hangs around y/n a lot more and does growl at other cookies who try to get to close (I love Choco Werehound Brute dude) as they help y/n around more and is kinda like a bodyguard for y/n. Choco Werehound brute also sometimes gets into fights with other cookies who are physically strong but when y/n comes around all of them act as if they weren't going to rip each other apart. Y/n's pets and basically all of y/n's personal belongings where transported to the cookies realm and y/n finds that kinda scary cause what does their parents think in the real world cause y/n basically is missing in that world but the cookies try not to dwell on that but y/n is scared of them for that reason but hey at least they got their pets with them and don't have to pay rent now (and in this au, earthbread is a actual place like other games and the cookies severed on of the many connections to the human world so y/n will have a tougher time getting back home if they tried.) y/n does get a little freaked out about that.

When y/n actually decides to let the cookies help them relax. 100%, Sauna Egg Cookie would help y/n relax at a nice bathhouse he works at and he will try his hardest to give y/n the relaxation they deserve and then after y/n will kinda be forced to do yoga with yoga cookie and y/n if actually freaked out about how bendy and flexible yoga cookie is. She is obviously do only simple yoga stretches and stuff but y/n is struggling because they worked at a office cubicle and have such a shitty posture sometimes and now it's coming to haunt them. Butter Pretzel Cookie will get y/n into doing some painting and even if y/n can't paint at all or is actually good at painting, she is putting that painting in the fanciest frame known to man and treasuring it for the rest of time but then she'll ask y/n to be her model and yeah that'll be y/n's whole evening. Starfruit Cookie would probably have y/n star gaze with her as she tells stories about constellations and things like that as y/n falls asleep. Y/n does like living here but at the same time wants to go home but they'll never let y/n leave, not now, not ever.

(that's it for my yapping session for today. If you guys like it and want more please don't be shy and request any ideas for stories or y/n's. But for now please stay safe and drink water!)

[fxckn-sxck-fr]

Oh well, since you encouraged me... Something that's been on a mind since I've read your older brother!Dick I just keep thinking of the incest potencial... Even with the more than controversial ages

𝐃𝐈𝐒𝐆𝐔𝐒𝐓𝐈𝐍𝐆 𝐎𝐋𝐃𝐄𝐑 𝐁𝐑𝐎𝐓𝐇𝐄𝐑 𝐘𝐀𝐍𝐃𝐄𝐑𝐄 𝐃𝐈𝐂𝐊 𝐆𝐑𝐀𝐘𝐒𝐎𝐍…

!!! 18+ THEMES, DEAD DOVE: DO NOT EAT, GN reader, fauxcest, age gap, toxic dynamic, noncon, making out, disgusting touching, brief hints of sexual content, general yandere fuckery, manipulation, kind of grooming(?), controlling behaviors, poor reader trying to cope so hard.

GGGGGGGGGRRRRRRRRAAAAAAAAAAAA—

Don’t worry, pooks, I saw all of your other asks about this idea and I’ll try to remember to hit all of the points you bring up. I just wanna keep it all in one place.

ALSO, ALSO, ALSO, LIFE WITH OLDER BROTHER ENJOYERS. HEY. HEY. LISTEN. If you’re not fucking with this ask and you don’t want the wholesome platonic dynamic you conjured in your brain ruined for you, DO NOT PROCEED ANY FURTHER. LIKE, AT ALL. Don’t say I didn’t warn you.

You literally clocked me so badddd. Yes, the undertones in that series are 100% intended. I’m not gonna add anything overtly incestuous, but like… the subtext is there for the freaks to pick up on. Platonic incest where the lines blur every now and then, I love you so much.

Anyways, lemme get to yapping for real.

If we’re going to vaguely follow the Life With Older Brother series, Dick suddenly being so friendly to you would be… a little bit jarring. But try to think about it from his perfective: he wasn’t really there for Jason, and the thought of failing another younger sibling is too much to handle. Maybe he’s just trying to be more present for you. As weird as he may come off, you should at least give him a chance.

The beginning isn’t all that bad. Even if he’s relatively new to the older brother thing, you can tell he’s trying his best, and dare you say it, he’s actually fun to hang out with. Playing video games, going out for ice cream, trashy movie marathons… it almost makes you forget about those weirder behaviors. Almost.

Now, one thing you quickly noticed is how touchy-feely he is. Whenever you’re together, it seems like he’s always got sort of body part touching you one way or another. Sometimes, it’s subtle: a knee resting against yours, a very quick head-pat, his hand brushing against you as he gestures at something. Nothing all that noticeable unless if you’re very sensitive to touch. But then there are times where it’s a little more… overt. Like when he slings an arm around your shoulders. Or when he holds your hand while out and about. Or when pulls you against his side by your waist when it’s a crowded area. Every now and then, you find yourself wondering if this is normal. Do siblings usually touch each other so often? It kind of makes sense, but… considering you haven’t even been siblings for a full year, should he really be this comfortable around you yet?

If you think you can set boundaries with him, good fucking luck. He might’ve made it seem like he was hearing you out, but it won’t be long before he’s back at it with the touching. Okay… maybe this is something he really can’t help. As annoying — and weird… and uncomfortable — it may be, you’ll probably just have to suck it up and get used to it. Some people are just very handsy. But not like that! Oh my god, no. Dick’s Nightwing; a good guy, for Christ’s sake. He would never do anything like that!

(… Right?)

Here’s the thing about platonic physical affection: how weird can it get before people finally draw the line? Is it forehead kisses? Hugging someone by the waist? Having them sit in your lap whenever the opportunity arises? Are any of those things actually weird, or does Dick somehow make them weird? Because, yes, he still most definitely acts like an older brother — he certainly teases you like one, and you constantly have to fight against the urge to bite him like a feral weasel — but the touching… well… maybe familial affection is just a concept foreign to you (thanks in no small part to Bruce), but Dick somehow makes it feel like something else.

And you’ll admit; you don’t actually know what that something else is. All you know is that you’re pretty sure big brothers do not do that gentle, extremely intimate thumb-stroke thing to their little sibling’s face before a forehead kiss. And they also do not come up from behind their little sibling for a hug.

And the lap thing?

That was probably the turning point.

Because what older brother has their little sibling sit on their lap while watching TV? One hand on your hip, the other on your thigh… he’s doing that weirdly intimate thumb stroke thing on your bare skin, and all you can do is sit there and think, oh… I don’t like this. If you’re brave enough to ask him what he’s doing, he’ll play dumb. Hm? What do you mean, kiddo? He’s not doing anything… what are you talking about?

Before you can even begin to express how uncomfortable you are, however, his fingers start toying with the hem of your shit. You’re acutely aware of his knuckles brushing against the flesh of your torso, sending an uneasy shiver up your spine. Dick’s no stranger to touching your waist area, and while you still don’t really like it that much, you’ve gotten used to it. But this? Something about the actual skin on skin contact makes you freeze up entirely.

“You know,” Dick would thoughtfully begin, “I’m probably the luckiest big brother in the world. I don’t think you realize just how cute you are, (Y/N).”

His hand then inches its way up your shirt.

BadbadbadbadbadbaDBADBADBADBAD—

Don’t bother fighting back. Don’t bother yelling at him. Don’t even bother squirming as he gently begins to run circles into the skin under your shirt. His grip on your thigh is like iron, holding you down to his lap and making any struggle futile. In fact, if I were to venture a guess, you’d probably be too petrified to even move, the shock of the moment rendering you completely immobile. This was supposed to be your big brother; yes, he’s a bit weird and overprotective, but he’s still your fucking big brother. And while your knowledge on big brothers may be extremely limited, you know for a fact that this is crossing a line.

Your faces become closer and closer until his breath is ghosting against your lips. “I love you, kiddo. You know that, right?”

You don’t dare to offer him a response. Hell, you don’t even know what you could say to that. The only thing filling your brain is the brazen warning bells screaming for you to get the fuck away from him. Except you can’t. For whatever reason, your body’s frozen in place, limbs weighing you down like heavy ice blocks.

You can’t move.

You can’t fucking move.

And, of course… he takes advantage of that.

By the time his lips softly plant themselves on yours, it’s too late. The lines between platonic and whatever the fuck this is have long been crossed, and you can never go back to pretending like everything is normal between you two. All of the subtle warning signs you opted to ignore were now blaring in your mind like loud sirens, almost mocking the fact that you didn’t fucking trust yourself.

This can’t be happening. This absolutely can’t be happening. You thought of this creep as your big brother; was this really the same guy that helped you with homework and let you play games on his laptop? Was this really the same guy under the Nightwing mask?

While the kiss evolves into something a little more passionate, he doesn’t take it too far. Just a gentle make-out session with roaming hands. He ends it by holding you against his chest, seemingly content with just occasionally peppering kisses to your face for the next hour or so. Neither of you say anything during this time. Even if you want to yell at him and demand why the fuck he did that, you’re too shocked to even form a coherent thought.

The man you thought could be your big brother is a massive fucking creep.

You think you’re going to be sick.

He doesn’t go out for patrol that night. Instead, he simply picks you up and carries you to his room, dressing you in his clothes for bed. You’re still trying to process the humiliation of letting this all happen as he slips you under the sheets with him and cuddles up to you. Sleep doesn’t come easy to you that night. How the fuck could it? Not only do you have that stupid fucking kiss haunting you, but now you have this sicko’s hand playing with the waistband of your shorts (his shorts), and god. You’re not sure how you didn’t throw up then and there.

So. What happens afterwards? Well, first off, no more phone. Dick’s not an idiot; he knows the lines he crossed that evening and would rather you not call Bruce or Alfred or the police. You’re also not allowed on his laptop unless if he’s supervising you, and your ass is not going outside anytime soon. Then we have the gross shit… yeah, now that he’s had a taste, he’s gonna be all over you. It won’t go that far just yet — he’d rather ease you into that territory, much like what he’s been doing before — but it can get a bit steamy. At least for him. You might still be grossed out over all this or whatever.

You know what the worst part is? He still has the audacity to act like your older brother. It doesn’t matter how many times he touches you or forces you to kiss him: he’ll call you kiddo through it all and offer to play some video games afterwards. In fact, are times where you both return to your previous sibling banter and you can almost convince yourself that things are totally fine. There you go again, falling for his meticulously set up trap.

This new dynamic might take some time to get used to, but Dick will try his damned hardest to make it seem natural. So what if Big Brother sometimes wants to pin his cute little sibling against the counter and leave love bites on their neck? Sometimes, it just has to happen. No harm, no foul. This could be normal if you stopped being so weird about it, you know.

And, you know what… you may find yourself finally accepting that this is your new normal. What else are you supposed to do? You can’t call anyone, you can’t run away, you can’t even fight back because he was trained by fucking Batman… you sure as hell don’t have to like it, but maybe you can make peace with it. This is nothing more than an annoyance from your big brother. That’s all. It’s not him grooming you. It’s not him taking advantage of you. It’s just him being a little irritating at times. Ignore the urge to throw up… ignore how your skin crawls whenever he’s near you… every sibling has their flaw, and being a total creep is Dick’s.

You’d probably begin to despise Bruce a little, too. Did he know how fucked up his former ward is? Or is the exact same way? Guess you’ll never know, because the man can’t even bother to check up on you. He essentially took you out of the system and threw you into the den of a wolf, subjecting you to a new personal hell you can’t even escape from. And Alfred… you thought he actually cared. Is he not concerned about the sudden radio silence on your end?

You really can’t help but wonder if anyone even thinks about you outside of the apartment, and with Dick being in control of what information he feeds to Bruce over the phone, all you can do is guess at this point. In the meantime, Big Brother just came back and needs a hug… why don’t you come on over to the couch, kiddo?

Ugh. There are so many fucking directions I can go in from here. You mentioned Bruce (or eventually Tim) becoming suspicious and finding out what’s going on, and GRRRRR. SO GOOD. SO FUCKING GOOD. I need to write a blurb about this. It’s so addicting. I just had to get some of the base ideas on this out because this concept has been marinating in my brain for way too long. I’m not kidding, I was going to actually explode if I didn’t get to talk about this. I NEED MORE OF THIS TYPE OF SHIT.

[bubbles-for-all-of-us]

@ablev92 can't leave the boy hanging with nothing. This is not exactly your idea but something that hopefully will still scratch the itch. 🤍✨

His girl

"It's beyond me how you stomach that guy," Violet breathed out, her body slumping onto the mat. You couldn't help but let out a chuckle. Xaden was desperate to keep her alive. Wasn't hard to see why especially considering that he had so openly brought her to train away from the rest of the group and with the rebellion bunch.

"Less talking more working, give me five more", you tapped Violet's thigh, urging her to do a couple more sit-ups. The girl's muscles were nowhere to be seen. It still was beyond you how she wasn't swept by the wind while crossing the Parapet. She huffed as she pulled up time after time. Then maybe the brain was the better asset to possess. "Rest for a bit, I don't want to see your lunch all over the floor", you threw a water bottle her way that she barely caught, chugging it down in no time.

You let yourself sink to the floor as you too started your warm-up. Itching for a real tassel. You haven't properly fought in a couple of weeks. Even since during one of the patrols you got mixed up in an ambush. You slid down your dragon and injured your shoulder. It was nothing major but the boys were mother hens so you were not allowed to do anything.

"Do you ever fight with him?", Violet gestured to Garrick once more. Your eyes moved over where both Xaden and he threw punches at one another across the room. Shirts were already discarded. But then most of the time these boys trained shirtless. Too much body heat they said. "Shouldn't you only have your eyes set on Xaden? He's a jealous type", you asked her teasingly. Leaning forward to stretch your back. You couldn't see her face but she no doubt was red like a tomato. Violet couldn't hide her emotions for shit. That was another thing Xaden should teach her.

"I thought Xaden was the scary one but...", she breathed. Her yapping was starting to get on your nerves but then Xaden chose you for a reason. The rest of the group would have already broken the girl or she would be crying in the corner. "Don't say it out loud Garrick's ego might explode", you chuckled, reaching to put your hair up into a messy bun. "But do you?", Violet urged. You could understand her fascination this group was quite a sight for sore eyes. "I fought with all of them. Imogen, Bodhi, Xaden, Garrick", you said casually, eyes locking on the person you hoped would finally look your way.

"And you walk off the mat?", you could feel her eyes on you but you were already shrugging your shirt off, leaving only a tight black sports bra on, "Well, I'm standing here, aren't I?", you winked her way as you stepped closer to the mats.

"Looks very fun but I'm borrowing Garrick", you said casually, motioning with your hand for Xaden to step away. The guy simply brushed his hand through his messy hair as he smirked. "I ain't fighting with you", Garrick said coldly, turning his attention back on Xaden as if you weren't standing right in front of him. You could hear oo's sounding all around the room. Even Xaden snickered. "I ain't got all day Riorson, let's...", Garrick grumbled but you struck first, fist colliding with his hand and making him drop his dagger.

"You little...", Garrick bit back as he turned towards you, his big shoulders flexing as he quickly threw a punch of his own. One that you quickly dogged. Elbowing him in his stomach as you turned. It almost looked like a dance as you both swirled around the fight mat. Eyes blazing. You managed to throw him off balance slightly hoping to deliver a final blow with your leg. Unfortunately, it was Garrick we were talking to. He was the best for a reason. His hand quickly wrapped around your ankle as he tugged, your back met the floor as an airy huff slipped past your lips.

"He will kill her", Violet nearly shouted, her knuckles pale as she gripped the water bottle. "Relax, enjoy the spectacle," Imogen mussed. And she wasn't wrong. Everyone had stopped to watch. "He will...", Violet was about to argue more but her eyes caught the smiles painting both of your lips. You had quickly wrapped your legs around Garrick's torso, arm logged in his throat as you managed to turn you both around. Chest heaving for air.

"Want to tap out?", you mussed, leaning closer to him, locking eyes with the man beneath you. Garrick had a proud smirk on his face. You watched him slowly lifting his hand off the mat, fully prepared to walk away from this. But that same hand quickly wrapped around your neck, throwing you off balance as he once again pinned you right beneath him, "Nice try baby", he breathed right by your ear, sending goosebumps down your spine.

"Press harder, I like it", you purred back, making him rare back as you stared at you, "You will be the death of me", he released his grip around you but his warning finger was still pointing at you. "Go fuck it out", Bodhi shouted across the room, making some people laugh. Garrick shot him a death glare. "Be careful, you might be laying beneath him next", you teased back, making Bodhi bite back a laugh as Garrick shook his head.

"Am I off bed rest now?", you asked as you followed him across the gym. "No", he breathed simply, "You're still in pain, your left hand twitched multiple times. It hasn't healed yet", Garrick said plainly as he reached for his water but you quickly kicked it out of reach. Garrick stilled for a heartbeat. The rest of the group was used to you both nagging at each other so almost no one paid you any attention.

"Let me train", you said firmly, only to let out a yelp as Garrick yanked you closer, pushing you against the walk as his frame toward over yours. "I said no", he hissed back. But you knew what this was. You had gone missing that night. They looked for you for two days straight. Well... Garrick did. Against all orders. No sleep. No food. His clothes were damp as he flew over and over. Followed by your dragon. You reached up to cup his face and Garrick instantly closed his eyes.

"I promise you that I'm well", you said softly, "nothing hurts, it's slightly sore, that's all", you tried to reason with this big broody man. "And your fingers", he reached for your palm, you knew what he was looking for, so you quickly moved each of your fingers around. Bending and flexing them. Garrick let out a sigh. "Fine", he breathed. "I can train with Bodhi...", "Like hell is anyone else touching you", Garrick hissed back, making you roll your eyes.

Stepping on your tippy toes you wrapped your arms around his neck, Garrick rose to his full height, making your feet dangle as you held up. His hands instantly reached down to cup your bum as you wrapped your legs around him. "You're lucky that I love you", he muttered as he carried you back to his preferred corner. You gave him your best angel smile that he only shook his head at. "I love you too, thank you for trusting me", you kissed the side of his neck softly, before your eyes darted back to the room. "If you feel..", Garrick started but you cut him off quickly, "Even the tiniest sense of pain I will tell you and we will stop". He nodded at your words, frown disappearing. Violet stood there with her big eyes still on you two. You quickly saluted her. "They're like...", she breathed out, making Imogen let out a chuckle, "Dating, fucking, loving - all of it", the female mused, "Just don't stare too much Garrick doesn't like it". Imogen tapped Violet's shoulder making her turn for the mat that exclusively belonged to Garrick. She knew without having to ask that your roll of training Xaden's girl was now her responsibility.

[kingkatsuki]

— will you love me till it hurts? (never leave me at my worst)

Kaji hates himself when he gets like this, but luckily for him he has you to bring him back from the brink.

Pairing: Kaji Ren x f!reader.

Warnings: 18+, established relationship, exhibitionism, public sex, dirty talk, spanking, choking, blood!mention, fingering, creampie.

Word Count: 4.6k.

Kaji hates it when he gets like this.

The anger and frustration of the world work to tear every inch of the resolve he’s built around himself brick by brick. Demolishing the wall to leave him surrounded in the rubble of his destruction as he’s back to worn foundations and forced to try and find himself again.

He was already running late to meet you, something that had regret swimming in his chest at the thought of you waiting outside pothos looking all pretty while he made his way through the town. Deciding to cut through a back alley to avoid going through the market street to avoid any early evening crowds he managed to run into a group of four guys who were hunched in a circle.

He tried to ignore them, he really did— with absolutely no intention of ruining your date night again. But the taller one out of the four just had to say something. The only word he was able to make out over his music was Furin, as Kaji’s hands clenched into fists at his sides. Exhaling softly, he turns his headphones up, drowning out the asshole with heavy metal. Kaji palms his jeans pocket and groans when he feels no chupa chups inside the denim.

Fuck.

He heaves a sigh as he shoves his hands inside his grey hoodie pocket in tight fists. Trying to resist the deep-seated urge inside him to throw hands as icy blue eyes darken and he continues forward, deliberately stepping around the asshole guys in front of him— but of course, they just had to try and cause problems. Stepping in front of Kaji the taller guys shoulders barged into him roughly, knocking him sideways as the anger continued to surge through his veins.

Kaji thinks of your face, and it helps, but this one guy in the group just won’t stop fucking yapping. He can’t hear it over his headphones, but he can see his big fucking mouth moving— and when there’s a pause in loud music to change tracks it’s all he can hear.

“—fuckin’ pussy.”

“What was that?” Kaji pulls his headphones down, any chance of backing out long gone.

“I said. These Furin guys like to act hard but you look like a fuckin’ pussy.” He enunciated the final words and that was it— all Kaji saw was red.

Nothing can stop his fist from swinging, a mean rear uppercut that has the guy raised from the ground before losing his footing and tumbling down like a tree in the forest. Kaji feels the satisfaction shoot through his veins as he narrowly dodges a punch to the side of his head, knocking his headphones off as he prays the crack he heard wasn’t the plastic breaking. He’s quick to land another punch as two guys take him on at once, swinging his leg to boot someone back as he hates that he can’t bring himself to stop.

Another crude crack sounds as his fist collides with a guy's nose, a hit that has blood running down his chin and onto the brick beneath him as the damage has the guy running. His friends gathered with fists raised as if deciding whether the fight was still worth it— there was always strength in numbers, but somehow Furin strength seemed to defy that simple logic.

Kaji is about to make their choice for them as the raging hatred still ebbs through his veins, unable to discern the difference between his opponent’s as he swings for whoever’s closer— feeling a rough hit to his eye, enough to draw blood against his brow as warm crimson trickles down his temple.

“Ren!” A voice shouts, and it permeates the monster that’s reared its ugly head inside him, but not enough for him to keep swinging, “Ren!”

“You should keep that mouth shut and those legs spread, doll.” Another one of the guys sneers, but it’s enough to have Kaji’s attention now— if they so much as touched a single hair on your head he’s certain he’d kill for you, “That’s all you’re good for.”

Kaji takes the chance to lead uppercut the guy distracted by you, knocking his jaw and he’s certain he hears you call his name again. But his vision blurs as pure ferocious anger takes over as he continues hitting the guy for saying anything about you.

“I’d happily break one of Furin’s whores.” It was like this man was trying to push Kanji even further into becoming a beast, as you fought to keep him where he stands.

“Ren, don’t!” You winced as you heard the shlick sound of fists colliding with cartilidge as the guy cried out in pain, positive Kaji had broken his nose.

“If you guys don’t fuck off I’ll scream so loud half of Furin will be here in five fucking minutes.” You bluff, close enough to pothos that it could work as truth. There was always at least one member of Furin in there at any given time, it was at least something.

“Yeah, yeah. He ain’t fuckin’ worth it—” He sneers, holding his nose. Thankful that his friends decided to break off into a run before the lead guy turned to leave, “You’re with a fucking wild animal, doll.”

You bolted towards to Kaji as they left, who still stood at the corner of the street. Tentatively reaching up to palm his cheek as you pushed yourself up on tiptoes to assess the damage from the cut oozing blood on his brow.

“Ren, what the fuck happ—” You begin, but he’s quick to cut you off with a fierce kiss that’s all tongue and teeth. Unforgiving and and relentless he forces his tongue between your lips as they part with surprise, swallowing your objections with his mouth as he pushes you against the nearest wall.

You taste the sharp metallic tang of his blood on your tongue as you moan against his lips, your palms splayed across his chest to push him back with worry as you search his eyes for answers.

“Ren, what happened?” You murmur, but Kaji doesn’t respond. Instead, he crashes his lips back against yours with far more insistently this time. His hand cups the base of your skull to keep you pressed against him as he tongues the roof of your mouth, pressing his toned body against yours as he pins you to the wall, firm and insistent.

He pours everything into the kiss, calloused fingers dig into your skin roughly as you find yourself moaning into his mouth in a mixture of pain and pleasure. It’s hard to keep up with Kaji when he’s like this, his movements frantic and rugged. His nose bumps yours as he tilts his head slightly, his palm moves from the back of your neck to circle your throat as he squeezes. The lack of air leaves you lightheaded as your eyes roll back, fingers pawing at his hoodie to keep him close as he bullies a thigh between your legs to keep you firm against him.

“Fuck,” You whine against his lips when you feel rough denim graze your panties, creating a salacious friction that has you shamelessly grinding down against him.

Kaji’s hand tightens against your neck to press you down harder against his thigh as he pulls more pretty sounds from the back of your throat. The sounds you make work to slay the fierce beast that rages inside him, now replaced with a new monster as he seeks to devour you whole.

Your hands are persistent as you card soothing hands through his hair, tugging slightly at the root as you rip more pretty sounds from deep in his chest.

“Ren.” You chance his name again, the sound paired with the heat from your touch scorches him as Kaji feels you slowly bring him back to himself.

“Don’t leave me—” The hand around your throat loosens as blue-grey eyes begin to soften, his chest heaving as he lays his forehead against your own, regret begins to ebb away at him when he notices his blood dried against your skin.

“What the fuck happened?” You hum softly, fingers stroking through his undercut as your nails scratch at his scalp, “You had me so worried.”

“Fuckin’ pricks,” He shakes his head, pushing some of his hair away from his forehead as his chest continues to heave.

You bring him back. He starts to feel the ache from his knuckles and the persistent throb against his brow. Letting you cup his cheeks in soft palms as you assess the damage with a worried frown, lips curled into such a pretty pout that Kaji has to restrain himself from kissing you again.

“Tried jumping me when I was coming to meet you,” He continued, taking the opportunity to lean down and bury his face in the curve of your neck as he inhaled your scent deeply, “Started talking shit about Furin.”

“So why didn’t you ignore them?” You murmured, pressing a kiss to the base of his jaw as he curled into you.

“Couldn’t.” It was then you realised the lack of sucker between his lips as it all started to make sense, “And then he said shit about you and I—”

“That doesn’t matter,” You whisper, pecking his lips, “Whatever they say doesn’t matter.”

“But it’s always you comin’ to protect me when I should be the one protectin’ you.” You can feel the sadness in his voice as you shake your head, shrugging your shoulder slightly to garner his attention.

“Don’t say that shit, Ren. I know you could’ve handled that, and you did,” You continued, holding his cheeks in your hands as he stared down at you with cold eyes, “But you would’ve hated yourself if I’d let you continue, and I would’ve hated myself too—”

You stroked the tender skin along the apple of his cheek, giving him a regretful look when he winced beneath your ministrations.

“You’re way too good for me.” He muttered as you shook your head.

“Shut up,” You smiled gently, pressing another kiss to his lips, “You don’t get to decide that.”

“It’s true, though.” He sighed.

He was nothing like Hiragi or Umemiya. He couldn’t treat you as well as they probably could— You deserved far better than him, someone who could look after you, protect you—

“You deserve better.”

You really did— and you looked far too pretty today all dressed up for your date together.

“Okay, now I’m convinced the lollipops are to stop you saying dumb shit.” You scrunched your nose in irritation, reaching into your jacket pocket to pull out a wrapped cherry chupa chups, “Let me shut you up again.”

Of course, you always carried around spare suckers for him.

Kaji watched as you began to pull at the base of the wrapper before his fists wrapped around your wrists tightly, holding you firm to stop you from unravelling it.

“Yeah— make me.” Kaji rasped huskily as the seams of his lips curled into a slight grin. Catching you off guard as the sucker dropped to the floor between your bodies and he pressed a sultry kiss to your glossy lips.

“Ren, you’re hurt.” You chance, wondering if he can even hear you as you feel his fingers flex around your throat in acknowledgement. His palm strokes against your clavicle, venturing lower to palm one of your breasts through your thin shirt before reaching down to palm the fat of your ass.

Using his grip to pull you against him so you could feel his need against your tummy, hard and pulsing through thick denim.

“Stop talkin’.” His lips press against the curve of your jaw, teeth grazing the soft skin as he reaches out to cup your warm sex between your thighs.

He makes it difficult for you to think, surrounded by the comforting scent of him as you breathe in the honeyed scent of candy mixed with the musky sandalwood that feels like home. Ignoring the fact that anyone could walk by and catch you in such a compromising position as you seek out your pleasure. Leaning into his touch his fingers brush the soaked crotch of your panties, pressing down on your fluttering hole through the fabric as he teases you with two fingers.

It’s pathetic really, how easily he has you like this. Debauched and needy in public no less, your clit throbbing with neglect as you shamelessly rolled your hips into his touch.

“Ren, someone could see—” You chance; but it’s futile.

“Let them.” He doesn’t mean it, not really. Every single part of you should be for his eyes only— he’d lock you away in a concrete castle and throw away the key if it meant that no one would so much as glance in your direction again or be the savage dragon that guards its entrance and protects the princess as he becomes a monster in order to keep you safe.

Your hips jolt when you feel him push your panties to the side, dragging two calloused fingers through your drooling slit as he pressed the wetness to your puffy clit. Delighting in the needy whine you made as he circled it slowly, half-lidded eyes focused on your face as he worked you with calm precision.

He was going far too slow for a man that had you pinned against a wall like this in public. The risk of anyone walking by and catching you was high enough as it is, but the fact that this was one of Furin’s patrol routes made it even worse— Any one of his team could walk by and see you like this at any given moment.

“Ren—” His name fell on deaf ears as he plunged two digits inside your tight heat, watching your head roll back against the cold brick as he began to pump them inside you with intent. Marvelling at the way your velvety walls pulsed around him, desperately trying to coax him deeper.

Kaji paused his movements, stilling his wrist to watch as you unabashedly fucked yourself against his fingers. He deliberately curled them towards the spot inside you he knew like the back of his hand as you keened at his touch. Clinging to his broad shoulders as you rocked yourself into his touch, thankful for his body pinning you to the wall, otherwise you were certain your legs would give way and you’d end up on the floor. You ground yourself against him, trapping his palm between you and his thigh as he pressed his leg firmer against you.

“That's it, pretty girl,” He rasped softly, reaching his thumb up to press sloppy circles against your clit, “You get yours.”

You leaned into his touch, greedily using him for your release. Rolling your hips to press his fingers against that same spot inside you as you felt the telltale signs of your impending climax.

“Oh, fuck, baby—” You whined, Kaji’s other hand was quick to slip between the back of your head and the wall. His sore bruised knuckles brushed against the tough brick to prevent your head from knocking against the hard surface as you found your bliss.

Kaji began to move his fingers with purpose as you met your end, taking over from your hips as he fucked you through your release. Pulling more airy sounds from between your pretty lips as he pressed lingering kisses against the corner of your lips.

“That’s it—” Kaji murmured, his persistent fingers prolonging your release as you writhed against him, “My good girl.”

His words had that same heat blooming inside you, from the tips of your ears down to your toes as your mind was shrouded in a lusty haze. Whining when he pulled his digits from your cunt to press them against your glossy lips, watching you take them inside your mouth as you sucked them clean. Tasting yourself on your tongue as he pressed down on the hot muscle, feeling your moans vibrate at the back of your throat.

“Stop teasing me,” You whined around his fingers as Kaji languidly pulled them from your warm, wet mouth. Dragging down on your bottom lip as he moved to dry them off against his pants.

You bit your lower lip between your teeth as you reached out to palm him through his skinny jeans. Annoyed that the rough denim had little give as you pathetically tried to wrap your palm around him, barely able to grip it between your fingers and yet it was enough to have Kaji’s hips jerking roughly. He grunted low and gravelly as he pulled his slick-soaked fingers from your core, busying himself with the button on his jeans as he tugged the zipper. Letting the denim hang around the curve of his ass, just enough to free his aching cock.

The length of it drooped towards the ground, hot and heavy as you immediately reached out to wrap slender fingers around it. Collecting the bead of pre that glistened against his leaking tip to smooth it down his length Kaji hissed through gritted teeth, his Adam’s apple bobbing in his throat as he swallowed thickly. Smiling coyly at his reaction, moving your hand back up to thumb his slit, collecting more fresh pre as you wrapped him back in a firm fist.

“Who’s teasin’ now?” He huffed, placing his palm on top of yours to tighten your hand around his cock. Holding it steady as Kaji began to fuck himself into your fist, rutting his hips as you let out a salacious whine at the sight.

“Look who’s talking,” You gasped when he moved his other hand to the back of your thigh, propping it up on his hip as your skirt bunched at your waist.

“Oh, fuck.” You practically whimpered when you felt the swollen tip of his cock nudge your clit as he dragged it through your folds. Coating himself with your slick as he gave a tentative jerk of his hips, his lips pressed against your ear as you felt the vibration in his tone when he caught against your tight hole.

Kaji moved his hand away from his cock in favour of leaning back to watch as you guided him towards your entrance with your fingers, pressing down on the thick, bulging veins as he felt the resistance of your fluttering hole. Seeking out your warmth as he slowly began to press himself inside you, immediately groaning when he felt the heat engulf him. Certain he’d never tire of the sensation, no matter how many times he had you like this.

You made it difficult to think— to breathe sometimes. Stealing every conscious thought as you shrouded his very being, plaguing him with thoughts of you that he was so certain there was nothing else in this life worth having if he didn’t have you.

“Ren, hurry up,” You brought him back from his thoughts with a jerk of your hips, “We don’t have time, someone could see—”

Kaji was positive that he didn’t even give a fuck if the whole of Furin saw once he was buried inside your warm, wet cunt. The overwhelming pleasure etched away at him as he could only think of you—

“Let them see.” He snarled brazenly, flashing his sharp fangs and gums.

“Ren.” You whined back.

“So fuckin’ needy.” Each word was enunciated by a sharp rut of his hips as he set a rough, fast pace.

Kaji hissed, feeling your cunt clamp down around him from his crude tone. Your hands clinging to his shoulders as he eased his hips back before surging forward. His skin was coated in a thin sheen of sweat beneath his hoodie as he felt the heat practically radiate from your warm body.

His balls slapped against the curve of your ass as the sound of skin against skin filled the alleyway. It wasn’t exactly a public path, but you knew many people liked to make the shortcut towards pothos through here, so the thought of being caught sent a discomfiting heat straight to your pelvis.

But Kaji fucked into you with purpose, settling on a desperate pace that had him willing you towards your climax hard and fast. The material of his hoodie was too thick to feel his body through, as you moved your hands to the back of his skull to feel skin against skin as you delighted in the sticky tack of his sweaty body against yours.

The rough brick scraped against your back with each sharp thrust, certain to leave marks behind as you tried your best to meet his movements from your precarious position.

“You’re always so good to me, pretty girl,” He rambled, his blunt cockhead grazing against your cervix with each forward motion, “So perfect.”

Kaji’s love is like a tsunami— indiscriminate, ferocious and all-consuming in its power. His waves crash down to encompass you, and carry you out to sea. It’s pure, unbridled power and it terrifies you sometimes quite how much you love him in return.

“Oi,” He smacks the curve of your ass playfully before gripping it hard, fingertips dip into the plush skin as he changes the angle of his thrusts, “What you thinkin’ about, sweetheart?”

“You.” You answer truthfully, as though there could ever be another answer.

Kaji’s lips curl into a small, genuine grin at your answer. Unable to stop himself from leaning forward to bring you into a sloppy kiss, drowning out your moans of pleasure as he continued to pound his cock into your dripping cunt.

You were positive you wouldn’t last much longer, especially with the way his cock moulded you into the shape of him. The prominent veins dragging against your inner walls with each cant of his hips, paired with the way the hairs at the base of his cock gave a delicious friction to your puffy clit every time he buried himself inside you the hilt had you racing towards your impending climax and you weren’t going to last much longer.

“I know you’re close,” He rasped gruffly, teeth nipping at your pulse point, “I can feel you clamping down around me.”

“Fuck, Ren.” Your lips parted in a near-constant groan when Kaji slipped a hand between your connected bodies to press his thumb against your clit, rubbing messy figures of eight against the sensitive nub as he pushed you towards your end.

Your lashes fluttered as you felt him bite down against your jugular, his tongue salving the mark as your walls clenched in response. Teetering on the precipice of bliss you continued to moan from each messy rut of his hips inside your wet heat before you found yourself falling into euphoria.

“Oh, shit.” You gasped as you felt your climax flow through you in harsh waves, your hips jerking as you came undone against him with a jumbled cry of his name. Your nails dug into the back of his neck as your thighs shook with pleasure, feeling Kaji continue to fuck you through your release as his thumb kept consistent against your clit. It was all too much and not enough at the same time as your walls continued to pulse around him, trying to milk his cock of his spend as you rode out your release.

“Ren.” Your lips parted in a constant pant as you tried desperately to remember to breathe, tongue almost lolling out from between glossy lips as Kaji adjusted your thigh on his hip. Holding you tight as he began to use your body for his own pleasure, fucking into you with haste as he searched for his end. His balls were heady and swollen with cum as they begged to spill into your eager hole, “I wanna make you cum too,”

“You don’t even have to fuckin’ try.” He grunted, your walls clung to him even tighter since your release. Increasing the pleasurable sensation as his pace became languid and desperate, messily thrusting his lips into you as he cherished the way your walls were squeezing around his cock, “I’m gonna—”

“Do it inside.” You barely managed to rasp out breathlessly as Kaji let out a sinful groan in response. Your nails digging into the back of his neck only heightened the pleasure as he gave a few more sloppy thrusts before spilling his spunk inside you with a debauched groan.

“Fu-uck.” Kaji’s hips pressed snugly against yours to the hilt as he emptied his heavy balls inside you. Shooting streams of whited, hot cum inside your water walls as your cunt continued to clench around him in satisfaction.

“Take it.” He whispered gruffly, pressing a kiss to the seam of your parted lips as you continued to pant, pathetically trying to capture your breath back.

You basked together in the afterglow as Kaji indulged in you for a moment longer, delighting in the fact you were pumped full of his release as you reached up to push his sweaty fringe away from his face, exposing his forehead as you gave the gash on his brow another frown. The blood now caked and cracked against his skin as Kaji snorted at your face.

“Don’t look at me like that after we just had sex.” He pouts, as you playfully push your finger against his lips to try and push them back down.

“Your cuts gonna get infected— ahh,” You broke off into a whine when Kaji began to pull his softening cock from your tightness, his wound immediately forgotten as he moved his focus to the mess now seeping out of your trembling hole and drooling down your inner thighs. Kaji was quick to save the moisture as he collected it on his two fingers, dragging it back up to your abused sex to push it back inside you as you gasped in surprise. He was quick to move your panties back into place as you grimaced at the sensation of your combined essence soaking the fabric.

“I’ll be fine.” He teased when you gave his wound another look, “I’ve been through worse.”

“That’s not the point.” You deadpanned, watching as Kaji moved back slightly to tuck his softening cock back inside his skinny jeans. Your head rested back against the brick wall as you held onto his arms to prevent your legs from giving out and collapsing to the floor. His touch was gentle as he smoothed your skirt back down your thighs and adjusted your top that had ridden up during the tryst. Unable to stop himself from stealing another kiss from your pouty lips.

“How could I not be fine when I have you to look after me.” Kaji grinned as he bent down in front of you to pick the fallen sucker up from the ground, fingers working at tugging the wrapper off before shoving the stick between his lips.

“Yeah, well you owe me another date night.” You pouted as he wrapped an arm around your shoulders to lead you towards the local konbini. Practically feeling the warmth still radiating from him as he pulled you against his side.

“What’s wrong with going out now?” You turned your head to look up at him in exasperation as you scrunched your nose.

“You’re ridiculous— you realise you’re covered in blood and I’m now full of you,” You huffed, feeling the heat rise in your cheeks at the smug smirk Kaji gave you as you jabbed his chest with a firm finger, “We’re gonna grab some supplies from the konbini and I’m taking you home to fix it.”

“Sounds good, I need to pick up some more suckers—” He smiled, ignoring the throb that still ebbed through his head from the hits he’d endured barely an hour ago as he squeezed your shoulder playfully.

“Kaji!” You glared at the man beside you.

“Don’t call me that when I was just balls deep inside you five minutes ago, sweetheart.”

[sugarypinecones]

DODGE!!!!! god i want dodge so bad i want to lay between his stretched out legs and wrap my arms around one of them and rest my head on his thigh while he plays with my hair while we watch smth together but it's all background noise because his dick is so close to me mouf and i js wanna run my nose against the little outline from his washed out jeans IS THAT A CRIME IS THAT SO TERRIBLE please oh my god his strong rodeo arms i just wanna sit on his lap and rub my hands all over him im sorry i think im ovulating

(in lois griffin voice) whoever that was.. thank you….

NO because ur SO real.. like i audibly went holy to this, had to screenshot, send to council, and come back to re read again like that one sarah paulson video.

this was meant to be a tiny tiny blurb but it turned out way longer than expected so sorry lolz + f!reader

ALSO! if you sent an ask i am working on it, but i was on vacation so now im finally home and yupppp

send more asks. anything. i will try and match ur freak as hard as i can pls god, and anyways that being said:

like, get me; it starts out somewhat innocent. tired and lazy because of all the panic bullshit, you two decide to just stay home rather going out to all the random parties and events thrown between each game.

dayna and his mom don’t care that he has you over — they find it nice he found someone, a nice distraction from inside his head.

as for the show, it’s probably some random documentary or reality show: first thing he saw when logging into the streaming platform. he, genuinely, is probably engrossed in it, but you’re engrossed in him: how close you two are.

you’re laying between his legs, obviously, and his hands are strung around you messily, just wanting to have some sort of hold on you. how he’s holding you, you probably have no idea what, focused on the washed-out jeans of his — weathered from wear by rodeos or helping anne or anything else.

he’s probably yapping about something on the TV — “i don’t see how bestfriends could do that to eachother..” bla bla bla, you’re not really focusing in on it - humming, trying to sound interested in whatever it is he’s actually talking about. some “oh really?” and “i know..” are strung throughout the humming, but you have no idea if it’s actually appropriate to his talking.

he seems to catch on, though, unbeknownst to you. it’s hard not to notice his pretty girlfriend’s eyes focused directly on his crotch every few minutes, head shifting back and forth ever so slightly — making his dick twitch with need.

you wondered if his jeans are always this tight — wondering if you looked earlier you could’ve seen it, but the truth was, you really couldn’t. this only happened after the fact you got in the car — but obviously, you weren’t keenly aware of his crotch up until the minute you got in bed.

his hands run up and down ur back softly, and god it just makes the URGE to run ur face along the outline so much worse !!! he’s fallen quiet, so u slightly wonder if maybe something’s wrong or maybe he caught onto your disinterest in his words, so you glance up out of the corner of your eye, only to realize he’s been watching you for god knows how long.

he probably says something stupid, like: “you know the tv’s over there, right?” or “interesting?” something really dumb and smart-assy. you roll your eyes, probably say something back, and one thing leads to another and he’s nonchalantly trying to suggest you could do it if you wanted to.

so you do. and god !! does it feel as good as u thought it would. he twitches beneath u and tries to act like it’s really not turning him on as much as it is, but it’s hard not to, a sticky, wet patch is already forming at the tip of his cock; itching to bleed through the light jeans.

he ends up pulling you closer, forgetting all about the tv, bringing you into a hasty kiss, needy and desperate but still filled with tenderness.

you fix yourself on his lap, smiling into the kiss, glad you got your way, like it was ever a fight to begin with — it never was, he would give you anything you asked for whenever you wanted.

he’s so gentle when he touches you. his large hands wrapping around your waist as he pulls you even closer into his lap, his eyes closed, enjoying the kiss for a few more moments before pulling away, panting softly, breathless.

"you’re really not very good at paying attention." he mumbled breathlessly, a small smirk on his lips as he looked down at you.

he moved his hands down your sides, running them up and down your thighs, his thumbs brushing against the skin beneath the hems of your shorts as he shifted underneath you slightly.

“what’s going through your pretty little head, hm?” he mused, tilting his head slightly as he studied your face.

you hummed softly, looking up at him with a small, playful pout on your lips.

“well… i was listening,” you pouted, “kinda.”

he chuckled softly at your response, his hands continuing to run up and down your thighs, the touch of his palms warm and rough against your skin.

“you’re so cute,” he murmured, “but i don’t think you were listening at all.”

he leaned forward, planting a soft kiss on your nose, before continuing to trail his lips down your jawline and down your neck.

“i think you were too distracted by something else,” he whispered, his breath warm against your skin as he nipped at your neck softly.

he knew you far too well - he knew the way your body reacted to his touch. he knew how to make you melt.

he continued to nibble at your neck, gently, his teeth grazing your skin just enough to send shivers down your spine.

“can you even remember what i was talking about?” he murmured playfully, his hands still running up and down your thighs.

“of course,” you retort, clearly defensive. “you don’t get how best friends.. could do that to eachother.” it’s clear you were listening to him, but not the television.

he chuckled softly, his lips pressed against your skin as you spoke.

“of course you remember that part,” he teased, knowing damn well you were paying more attention to his jeans than the television.

he gently nipped at your skin, sucking on a small patch of it for a moment, before pulling away.

“you were paying more attention to something else, weren’t you?”

you flush. obviously you were — who could blame you ?? :(( he was just soo close to u and so there..

he caught the flush of your cheeks, a smirk playing at his lips as he lifted his head to look at you.

“aww, you’re so cute when you blush, you know that?” he teased, “especially when you realize you’ve been caught.”

he chuckled softly, his hands moving up to your waist, his fingers slowly slipping beneath the hem of your shirt.

you pull him into a needier kiss this time, hands roaming all over, as if trying to find the right place to grab: but all seemed so promising, that you couldn’t actually settle.

he groaned softly into the kiss, matching your neediness with his own. his hands gripped at your waist, his fingers digging into your skin, as he pulled you close into his lap.

he ran his tongue across your bottom lip, requesting access that you happily gave him. his tongue slipped into your mouth, exploring it hungrily, as his hands roamed across your body.

he trailed kisses down your jawline and down your neck, his lips leaving a trail of fire on your skin. he nipped at your collarbone, leaving small, love bites in their wake.

he slowly pushed himself back against the back of the bed, pulling you with him so that you were now laying on top of him, your legs on each side of his hips.

his hands roamed down to your legs, gripping your thighs as he shifted beneath you, his hips rolling up against yours.

he groaned softly as he felt the pressure against his lap, his lips still moving across your neck, leaving little love bites in their wake.

“you drive me crazy,” he mumbled against your skin.

you hum in response — too overwhelmed with pleasure to say anything other than jumbled messes, so simplify yourself with a hum.

his hands moved up, slipping underneath your shirt, and running his palms across your skin. he could feel the heat radiating off your body, and it only made him want you more.

he pulled away from your neck, looking up at you with his blue, lust-filled eyes.

“i want you,” he breathed, “so badly.”

your breath hitches — and you want to tell him to have you — right there, however much he wanted, but you can’t strangle any words out.

he moved his hands up to your hips, his grip tightening as he pulled you tightly against him, grinding his lap up against yours.

he let out a soft groan, his head falling back against the back of the headboard as he felt the friction against his straining jeans.

“you’re so beautiful,” he panted, looking up at you with a look of need in his eyes, “so damn beautiful.”

he slid his hands up further, pushing up your shirt as he did, exposing your stomach. he ran his hands up across your stomach and up to your ribs, his touch leaving chills in their wake.

he bit his lip as he looked up at you, studying your face, taking in your features as if he hadn’t seen you a million times before.

“i want you,” he repeated, his voice slightly hoarse with need, “all of you, darling.”

you leaned in, pressing a gentle kiss to his lips before pulling away.

“well,” you said, your voice low and sultry, “what’s stopping you?”

he looked up at you, his eyes darkening with need.

“nothing,” he replied, his grip on you tightening as he spoke.

he shifted beneath you, pushing himself up so that he was sitting up properly against the back of the couch.

“except for these damn jeans,” he muttered, his hands moving to the button on his jeans.

you’re quick to help him — eagerly pawing at the button, undoing it with ease.

he let out a soft gasp at your eager touch, his hands moving to grip your waist as you undid the button on his jeans.

he lifted his hips as you began to pull down the jeans, a small, needy whine escaping from his lips as the fabric slid down his legs and hit the floor with a toss of your hand.

“so fucking needy..” he groaned softly, his hands running up and down your sides.

he pulled you back down onto his lap, his hands gripping your hips tightly as he settled you against his lap.

his hips bucked up slightly, his arousal pressed against your thigh as he moved.

“you’re so good to me,” he panted, his hands roaming up and down your back as he spoke, “i’m so lucky to have you.”

he tilted his head, his lips tracing a path down your neck, nibbling at sensitive spots along the way. he left a trail of little love bites, his teeth grazing against your skin in a way that made you shiver.

“i want to touch you,” he murmured against your skin, his hands running up your thighs. “please let me touch you.”

you could give him permission a million times over — and he’d still ask before doing anything else in the process, so gently; a contrast difference to his rough hands.

“please.” you retort softly.

he groaned softly at your response, his hands gripping your thighs tighter as he pulled you closer.

“always so polite,” he muttered, his lips still trailing down your neck.

he slowly moved his hands up your thighs, his fingers slowly sliding under the hem of your shorts.

“i need you so badly,” he panted, his hands moving higher, “can i..?”

you nod vicariously.

he let out a soft sigh of relief at your response, his hands moving further up your thighs, until they reached the edge of your panties.

he ran his fingers along the edge of the fabric, groaning softly at the realization that he was so close to what he wanted.

“you’re so beautiful,” he murmured, “so perfect..”

you hum contemptibly, smiling.

he smiled at your hum, his hands slowly moving up, slipping beneath the waistband of your panties.

he ran his fingers over your skin, his touch gentle and soft, as he slowly moved towards your center.

he could feel you shiver with each touch, his own hips rolling slightly beneath you as he grew impatient.

he slowly moved his hand down, his fingers sliding across your sensitive flesh, his touch sending shivers up your spine.

“you’re so warm,” he murmured, “so ready..”

he gently began to rub at your sensitive bundle of nerves, his touch light and teasing, as his other hand moved to your hip, holding you in place.

he groaned softly at the feel of your reaction, his eyes studying your face intently.

“so beautiful..” he repeated, his fingers slowly increasing their pace.

he watched as you began to move against his touch, your hips rolling in response to his touch.

he groaned softly as he felt you press against him, his own arousal growing more and more with each small movement you made.

“that’s it,” he panted, “just like that..”

he continued his movements, his fingers quickening their pace as he felt you growing closer.

he could feel your body shaking with need, your hands gripping tightly onto his shoulders.

“just relax darling,” he murmured, “let go for me..”

he continued to rub at your sensitive core, his fingers moving in a steady rhythm, as he watched you grow closer and closer to the edge.

he could feel your body growing tense, your grip on him growing tighter, as you began to whine and pant with need.

“that’s it, just like that..” he repeated, his own hips rolling up against you as he continued his ministrations.

he watched as you grew tense, your body trembling as you reached the edge, your eyes squeezing shut as you arched your back slightly.

he kept up his movements, his hand still rubbing at your sensitive flesh, continuing to bring you closer and closer to release, “come for me, please..” he panted, his own need growing stronger by the second.

he could feel you growing closer and closer to the edge with each second, your breath coming in soft pants and moans as you teetered on the brink.

and finally, you came, your body shaking as you reached your climax, a soft moan escaping from your lips.

he continued to move his fingers gently against you, helping you ride out your orgasm, as he spoke softly, “so perfect..”

he gently pulled his hand away from you, his eyes watching as you came down from your high. he studied your face, taking in your flushed cheeks and messy hair.

“that’s it darling,” he murmured, “just breathe..”

he moved his hands to your hips once more, holding you tightly in his lap as he waited for you to regain your bearings.

[neediestwhore]

collegeau; shitty bf! sukuna x sweet!reader

a/n; let's just be honest with ourselves, if you were to ever date sukuna, he would be a shitty bf.

cw; manipulation, cheating, insecurity, alcohol

how does it feel y/n? to spend hours getting ready, trying to look good for your indifferent boyfriend? the amount of time you spent in the shower, exfoliating your skin and shaving. the effort you put in to concisely do your makeup right and pick the best outfit for the date that YOU planned with sukuna.

how does it feel constantly trying to get your boyfriend's attention when all he does is want to fuck you and ghost you afterwards?

if you had a choice to go back in time and pick a different partner for yourself, you wouldn't take it. loving sukuna is apart of you and a promise that you'll keep to him. you promised that you would never leave him. and so you kept in, but instead of cherishing that promise, his sick mind decided to take advantage of your kindness.

sukuna is not a good boyfriend, he gets hard by your tears and sexualizes everything, he sees you as nothing else but a good fuck.

it hurts because he was sincerely sweet towards you in the beginning, his eyes would glimmer whenever he saw you. looking into his eyes now, all you see is apathy.

you begin to constantly reminisce the euphoric times you spent together, when both were genuinely happy together. you wished everything could go back to how it was but reality dawned when sukuna arrived home, smelling like alcohol.

"sukuna..i thought you said you were just going for dinner with some friends and you would be home before 10, look at the time now, kuna...it's 3 in the morning. i didn't sleep at all, worrying about you." you mumbled meekly.

"yeayeayea, shut your fucking trap, bitch, you and your goddamn mouth always yapping in my ear for everything i do." sukuna snarled.

your eyes brimmed with tears from his harsh words. but then again, it's always the same with him, he would reprimand you harshly for simply just caring for him. afterwards, he would act deceptively sweet towards you, kissing you on your forehead. it would always end the same, you fuck, you cuddle with him and his apathy towards you showed the next day.

was this really sukuna? the sweet guy that would always soothe you with his words and cradle you in his arms, reassuring you that he would never leave you.

well, he didn't leave you. that's good right? despite his apathy towards you, he was still your boyfriend. but you weren't the only one calling him your boyfriend for sure.

the day you found out he cheated, your hands trembled and your eyes were misted with tears. you had this urge to check his phone, and so you did. there were countless messages between him and multiple girls. they were calling your boyfriend petnames that you thought only you would call him. your heart shattered into fragments.

a fight broke out between the both of you that night, you kept on repeating "why? why? why sukuna?", you felt destroyed, ugly, and disgusting. absolutely no one would understand the insecurity that surfaced in you that night. your emotions were all over the place, you began to crumble and breakdown.

you were ugly right? if you were as pretty as the girls he texted he wouldn't have cheated on you. they were so beautiful, you felt as if you could never compare to them.

sukuna noticed how insecure you were and took you advantage. he coos with you with bittersweet words, assuring you that you're perfect and he would never do this to you again, it was just a mistake, he wasn't thinking straight. he didn't mean anything by it he just wanted to have some fun.

his words touched apart of your inner child deeply, he knew you grew up being bullied and deemed as unattractive, he knew you never felt enough for him. he was the only one that would love a disgusting human like you, right?

he cups your tear-stained cheeks with his hands, and kisses you. you wanted it but you hated it. how could he betray and act as if everything was okay? you were just his little puppet.

you gave in and made love to him. all for him to go back into his habit of cheating on you, comforting you and using you.

you can't do anything about it, you can't break free. you don't have the guts to cheat on him, you love him too much to even talk or glance at another guy.

you're stuck with sukuna.

[theetherealbloom]

BUT DADDY I LOVE HIM

Chapter One: I Know He's Crazy, But He's The One I Want

Summary: After harboring a crush on your dad's charming best friend, Joel Miller, you graduate college only to be confused by something he supposedly said to you, but then he and his daughter Sarah, reluctantly move away due to his work. Six months later, Joel returns to town, and you're desperate to confirm if his words were real. Both you and your dad eagerly await his arrival but for entirely different reasons. As feelings intensify, you realize that falling for him might not be temporary after all.

Pairing: Dbf!Joel Miller x Fem!Reader

Warnings: Angst, AGE-GAP Romance, Reader is Early twenties and Joel is in his late 30s to early 40s, Secret Romance, Sneaking around, FLUFF, SMUT, SMUT, SMUT, Heavy Make Out Session, Kissing, Barely any plot, Relationship, Swearing, Depression, Anxiety, Crying, Suggestive content, Flirting, Flattery, Awkward, Virgin reader, inexperienced reader, slightly Self Deprecating, Suggestive Content,

Word Count: 7.2k

A/N: Happy “The Tortured Poets Department” release! I couldn’t help but shriek with joy when I heard But Daddy I Love Him. Literally, dad best friend Joel Miller coded. I would like to thank @wheresarizona for dealing with my spam in her messages from me as I was yapping about the new album and gushing over her writing; she’s literally one of the best writers ever. That is a fact and I will die on that hill.

This fic is heavily inspired by all of the dad's best friend books and dbf!Joel Miller fics I have read over the years. It is with great honor (and a lot of fucking fear) to present to you this Frankenstein of all of my fav tropes!

Heads up, I’m actually dyslexic and English isn’t my first language! So I apologize in advance for the spelling and grammatical errors. As always, reblogs, comments and likes are always appreciated. Thank you and happy reading!

Song: But Daddy I Love Him by Taylor Swift

→ Next Chapter | Series Masterlist | Main Masterlist

As you walk past the neighboring house, you observe the real estate agent meticulously placing the 'SOLD' banner onto the weathered for sale sign. A strange sense of satisfaction washes over you, knowing that someone has finally purchased the property.

Entering your home, you release a sigh of relief as the familiar comfort washes over you. With a casual toss, your keys and bag find their place on the hallway table. The urge to call out to your dad bubbles up, but it freezes in your throat when you're met with an unexpected sound drifting from his home office.

Your heart quickens as you peek inside, only to find your dad's best friend, Joel Miller, lounging on the plush brown lazy boy. His deep, resonant voice fills the room, sending shivers down your spine even before you lay eyes on him.

Clutching the doorframe for support, you fight to steady your nerves. With trembling fingers, you manage to force a smile onto your lips, though it feels strained. "Hey, Dad. Hey… Joel," you manage to squeak, the mere sound of his name stirring a flurry of emotions within you.

The room feels stiflingly quiet as you wait for a response, the weight of Joel's gaze almost tangible. You swallow hard, feeling the heat rise to your cheeks as his intense eyes meet yours. His attention feels almost palpable, his gaze lingering on you in a way that sends a rush of warmth through your body. With a low, almost imperceptible grunt of acknowledgment, Joel's gaze finally breaks away, leaving you breathless in his wake.

You try to avert your gaze out of sheer habit, but it's futile, like trying not to be drawn to the most captivating, exquisite sight in existence.

God, it's as if he's been carved from pure perfection, each time you lay eyes on him.

That same intense, brooding look he wore the day of your college graduation, late last year, still grips you. And it seems Joel's gaze has the same effect on your dad, eliciting a familiar reaction. With a quick double-take, your dad shoots a glance at his best friend before swiveling in his seat.

"Hey there, sweetheart, just catching up with Joel. He dropped by for a surprise visit," your dad starts, but he halts mid-sentence, noticing your undeniable reaction. Concern etches his features as he addresses you. "Honey?" he prompts, his voice laced with worry, as you struggle to find your voice for the umpteenth time in mere seconds.

Joel's gaze narrows, his jaw clenching as his intense scrutiny roams over you, leaving a trail of heat in its wake.

As you cling to the doorframe, you can't help but notice the subtle movement of Joel's prominent Adam's apple, betraying his own unease.

Breaking the tension, your dad's nervous chuckle pierces the silence, attributing my apparent moodiness to your usual banter. He turns back to Joel, commenting on his friend's expression.

"What's going on with you two?" he quips, his tone shifting from light-hearted to serious in an instant. "Feels like there's some dirty secret between you," your dad adds, the jest evaporating from his voice. Yet, Joel remains unfazed by your dad's observation, his gaze still locked onto you as a faint smile curves his lips.

His lips curl into a smirk, accentuating the charming dimple that appears in his slightly scruffy beard whenever he smiles—a sight that never fails to tug at your heartstrings.

But as your dad's suspicion lingers in the air, Joel's demeanor shifts, yet you still struggle to connect the dots regarding why he's been giving you that look since graduation.

That day was meant to mark a pivotal moment in your life, celebrating the culmination of years of hard work in college. Yet, Joel's presence, the way he gazed at you, and the unexpected intensity of his hug during the congratulations... It's forever etched in your memory for reasons beyond the academic achievement.

And at the center of it all is one word: Joel.

He's a towering figure, a mix of solid muscle and the comforting softness of his belly. In the moment, you brushed off his tight embrace after receiving your diploma as merely the enthusiasm of the occasion.

But as you felt his whole body pressing right into yours during that hug, you knew it wasn’t your regular type of embrace.

“I’m so proud of you, darlin’,” he whispered in your ear. And though you didn’t catch his next words as clearly, you're certain he said something else that day. “…You feel so fuckin’ good….”

At least, that's what you've been convincing yourself he said. You recall gazing up into those big brown eyes, the same intense look he's giving you now, and wondering the same thing. How could an older, dangerously attractive man like Joel be even remotely interested in someone like you? Apart from being your dad’s best friend, he's more than twice your age and lives on the other side of the country with his daughter, Sarah.

You can almost picture the scandalized gasps of the single older women and ex-wives in your town, clutching their pearls and whispering, "What a mess," if you and Joel ever got together; if he was even remotely interested in you like that.

But you've replayed that scene in your mind every day since, and no matter how hard you try, there's just no denying your secret crush on him.

It all started long before college, your feelings for Joel simmering beneath the surface. Back then, you couldn't quite grasp what it was you felt for him. All you knew was that it felt right, and that feeling remains unchanged. Despite the nerves and shyness that being around him brings, there's another undeniable effect he has on you.

Like the overwhelming desire to sink back and beg him to indulge in things that his best friend's daughter probably shouldn't be fantasizing about. It's been a while since you last saw Joel, but he still exudes the same charm and looks even more handsome and fit than before, thanks to his job in construction as a contractor.

And when you receive that same look from him today, when your dad even jokes about his suspicions, you know Joel remembers that day too. The intensity in his eyes mirrors the moment he pulled you close, a memory etched as your most cherished moment so far.

"Well, I reckon’ my presence here might come as a bit of a surprise," Joel rasps, his gaze locked with yours as he emits a low chuckle for your dad's benefit. Unnoticed by your dad, Joel shoots you a sly wink, and you watch as your dad's tension melts away. He's relieved to know he wasn't imagining things, and undoubtedly thrilled once he hears Joel's news. "I'm moving here, right next door with Sarah. Tommy should be dropping her off here tomorrow," he announces with enthusiasm, but you feel the pit of your stomach drop.

Joel... here? For good? Oh, fuck.

Your dad erupts into loud whoops, raising both hands in the air. "It's about time, buddy! I knew you were keeping something from me," he adds, turning to you once again. "You were aware of this?" he asks, furrowing his brow with a hint of confusion. 

"You knew Joel and Sarah were coming to town, didn’t you?" Dad repeats, finally grinning like a child at the news. Smiling like a dad who's pushed aside any notion of his best friend showing interest in his only daughter. And you catch a sly grin on Joel’s face as he comes to your rescue. "Oh, I mentioned I might pay a visit. Buttercup here wasn't aware of the specifics or that Sarah and I would be relocatin’ back here," he explains to your dad.

But when Joel smoothly fibs to your dad, insinuating that you were aware of his impending move back to town, even though it caught you completely off guard, he seals an instant and secret pact between the two of you with a single glance. His deep brown eyes wink at you, sending a thrilling shiver down your spine. You realize you're in deeper trouble than you initially thought. And strangely enough, it's the kind of trouble you welcome with open arms.

In that fleeting moment, a silent understanding passes between you and Joel. With just a wink from him, your chest flutters with excitement, and a wave of anticipation rushes through you, leaving you feeling unexpectedly aroused at the prospect of having him nearby all the time. You're fully committed now, Joel's lie to his best friend serving as a shield for both of you, deflecting attention away from the undeniable tension between you.

"Sarah called last week," you fabricate, deciding to play along with Joel's deception. "As we were chatting, Joel mentioned something about visiting. It must've slipped my mind to mention it to you," you explain to your dad, hoping he'll buy into the white lie. Joel's low growl of contentment as he leans back, causing the leather chair to creak, reassures you that he approves of your little ruse.

Your dad's elation at the news of his best friend's return to their quaint little town is palpable, enough to overshadow any scolding he might have had for your omission about Sarah and Joel's supposed call.

But the truth remains: Sarah never called, and Joel's mysterious behavior is raising more questions than answers.

A surprise visit is one thing, but the intensity of Joel's gaze? The way he makes you feel? It's enough to give your long-standing crush on him a serious run for its money.

"But damn, Sarah will be here tomorrow?" your dad groans before chuckling. "A bit more notice would've been nice, but hell, it'll be good to see you, buddy."

"Listen, I've got something I can't postpone tomorrow. Maybe my daughter here could accompany you to pick up Sarah from the airport?" your dad suggests, turning his attention towards you.

Somewhere behind you, a strange sound escapes—it's you, emitting a sort of mewling noise that you know Joel catches, his smile widening in response.

"Sounds perfect," he agrees before you even have a chance to process it.

"Sweetie?" your dad asks, his tone sheepish now that he's volunteered you without asking if you were available.

You can only watch as the room seems to spin around you, nodding in agreement. "Yeah... sure, I don't have any tutoring sessions tomorrow."

"Perfect!" your dad sighs with relief, promising Joel they'll catch up later. "But I really need to get back to the shop. Are you alright here with her to help you settle into your new house with whatever you brought? The rest of your stuff hasn't arrived yet."

"Yeah, we'll be just fine," Joel assures in his trademark baritone, locking eyes with you.

You were so fixated on Joel's presence that you hadn't noticed the bags by the side of the home office.

"Sweetie? You sure you're okay to help? You look kind of..." your dad starts, but you take a deep breath, trying to compose yourself before replying, "Yeah, I'll be fine. We'll be fine. I can help."

"Alright then," your dad grabs his car keys, ready to leave the home office. He gives you both a final glance, kissing the top of your head. "I'll be back for dinner. Have fun, you two!"

You and Joel remain frozen in place, him on one side of the room and you by the doorway, both listening to your dad's fading footsteps and the rumble of his truck as he drives away.

You’re so fucked.

It's been six long months since you last saw each other, and for Joel, it's felt like an eternity. The day of your graduation marked the first time he laid eyes on you in over three years, and it was as if he was seeing you for the very first time.

You've grown into a remarkable adult, and Joel couldn't help but feel the overwhelming need to be there, not only for his buddy, your dad, but also for his sweet Buttercup. Witnessing his little girl all grown up and ready to embark on her journey into the world with her diploma was a moment he'll never forget. He'd never seen his best friend prouder, yet his gaze lingered on you for entirely different reasons.

Reasons and desires that had never crossed Joel's mind until that day. He couldn't resist pulling you close, feeling the warmth of your body pressed against his.

What was he thinking? Surely, everyone could see the effect you had on him.

But Joel wasn't thinking, he was acting on instinct. He was claiming what he knew belonged to him. Telling you he was proud of you was one thing, but he's still unsure if you heard what else he said about how good you felt in his arms.

Yet, he doesn't regret it. Because it was true then, and it remains true now. He just wishes he knew if you felt the same way. If you felt it in the same way he did. But how could you possibly feel the same way about him as he has about you these past six months?

Joel couldn't deny that there were many reasons why the relationship between you was complicated. For one, there was the age difference - you were more than half his age. Apart from having the kind of body he could grip, suck and fuck for a lifetime, additionally, you were his best friend's daughter, a bond that ran deep and could not be ignored.

That day, Joel took a risk, blurring the lines and potentially jeopardizing not just his friendship with your dad, but also the bond he shared with you by being so affectionate.

Surprisingly, you didn't seem to mind his gestures, and Joel was convinced that your dad hadn't even noticed. Despite the undeniable attraction he felt towards you, a feeling that lingered and intensified with every thought of you, Joel couldn't shake the worry that his actions might have caused a rift.

As days turned into weeks without any word from your dad, Joel's mind raced with doubts. He couldn't help but question if you had confided in your father about his behavior. Perhaps your dad had sensed Joel's infatuation with you, leading to a silence that spoke volumes.

Intrusive thoughts plagued Joel, wondering if you had been uncomfortable with his displays of affection. The fear that you might have someone else in your life to hold onto gnawed at him, leaving him restless and anxious about the potential consequences of his actions.

Joel and your dad used to share conversations daily, a bond that time and life's demands have gradually weakened, particularly with Sarah still navigating middle school. They both acknowledge the need to reconnect more often, yet something always seems to intervene.

But Joel's decision to visit your father in person wasn't impulsive; it was a deliberate choice, driven by a desire to stay for good this time.

No more fleeting visits. This time, it's permanent.

And it's all because of you.

Since your graduation day, you've occupied Joel's thoughts relentlessly. It's more than just an obsession; you're the sole focus of his mind, consuming his every waking moment.

You are the only thing he can fucking think about.

Joel would never dare voice his thoughts to your dad, not just because of his feelings, but also because your father had a history of using his fists to settle matters. If he even suspected a fraction of what Joel's mind was consumed with regarding his daughter... Well, Joel would never be allowed in your home, with your dad likely ensuring Joel carried a permanent reminder of his displeasure.

Despite his reluctance to keep secrets from his lifelong friend, Joel's motivation to act stems from a burning need that is beyond his mere desire to reunite with you.

He doesn't just want to see you again; he craves it with a fervor that borders on desperation. And the only way to satisfy this yearning is to summon the courage to ask for more.

Reconnecting with your dad was pleasant, but the sight of you, standing in the doorway of the home office, unleashes a torrent of emotions within Joel. It's as though he's been trapped in a deep freeze for the past six months, and your mere presence ignites a firestorm within him.

Every curve of your silhouette, every strand of hair framing your face, fuels Joel's desire until it simmers beyond control, all for you.

As you watched him, his gaze never wavered from your presence, taking in the way your chest rose and fell with each breath. He was grateful for the chair that supported him, as he felt the insanely hard erection you gave him.

Your natural grace and beauty had left him breathless, and he struggled to maintain his composure.

All from just being yourself. All without you even trying to do anything. 

You really are just fucking perfect in every way.

You're now an adult, poised to embrace all the challenges and pleasures that adulthood entails. The mere thought sends a shiver of anticipation coursing through you once more, evoking memories of his touch on that unforgettable graduation day.

The intoxicating blend of his woodsy cologne, the creak of his well-worn leather jacket, and the soft fabric of his grey tee shirt against your skin linger in your mind, igniting a longing for more.

The sensation that floods Joel as he lays eyes on you in person after so long defies description.

It takes all his willpower to resist the impulse to stride over and scoop you up, succumbing to the overwhelming desire to claim you as his own and to drag you into your bedroom. But he restrains himself, clinging to the last shreds of his resolve, waiting for any sign from you that you're ready for his embrace.

When your gaze meets his, he witnesses the hitch in your breath, and he can't help but murmur, "Come here, sweetheart." Your response is like a magnetic pull, drawing you into his strong, steadfast arms. As you melt into his embrace, he's struck by the sense of finally being home. You are his home now.

Joel inhales the sweet fragrance of your hair, longing to whisper countless sentiments into your perfect little ear nestled so close to his mouth.

But all he can muster, without risking scaring you away, is a simple declaration in his southern drawl, "I missed you, my little buttercup."

You bury your face into his checkered flannel, your words muffled against his shirt as you confess, "I missed you too, Joel."

Your body instinctively gravitates towards his, fueled by both necessity and reflex. The memory of his last embrace has haunted your thoughts for the past six months, and as his massive, comforting arms envelop you once more, it feels as though you're picking up right where you left off. He feels even better than you remembered, and the mingling scents of his cologne and freshly laundered clothes stir a desire within you to cling to him forever.

Reluctantly, he releases you from the hug, clearing his throat as you take a small step back, managing to squeak out, “Do you want a cup of coffee before you get settled in your new house? You look kinda tired.”

“Sure,” Joel nods, and you sense him hovering behind you as you descend the staircase and enter the kitchen. You can feel his eyes tracing your movements from behind.

You busy yourself preparing the coffee as Joel sets his things down, knowing it'll provide the perfect opportunity to sit down and have a proper conversation.

As Joel takes a seat at the table, his gaze remains fixed on your curves as you move around the kitchen. In that moment, he realizes there's no way he can stay in this house for more than an hour, without confessing his feelings to you.

“You got a boyfriend?”

The sudden question nearly causes you to spill hot water all over your hand, and you freeze, feeling a slight tremble coursing through you.

“Well?” Joel's deep voice sends shivers down your spine, as if you're caught in the midst of the most exhilarating earthquake imaginable. Your mouth hangs open, unsure of how to respond.

“Boyfriend or not?” he repeats, his tone commanding. “Not,” you answer instantly, not minding the question one bit, especially when you see its effect on Joel.

“Good. Perfect,” he rumbles in a low tone.

Turning back to the kitchen counter, the clinking of ceramic cups fills the room, your cheeks burning with embarrassment as the heat spreads throughout your body and to the tips of your ears.

“Cream and sugar?” you ask, turning your head just long enough to inquire.

The sight of your body shifting under your clothes already ignites fantasies in Joel's mind, imagining all the ways he could pleasure you, even right there on your dad's kitchen floor if you desired.

“Joel?” you prompt, breaking him out of his daydream.

“Uh… Sure. Cream and sugar,” he echoes, noticing your continued blush and slight trembling as you prepare the cups. As you approach him with the coffee, the sudden sound of your dad's voice startles you, causing you to drop one cup, which shatters on the floor.

"Sweetheart, are you okay?" he asks, concern etched on his face as he rushes to the sink to run cold water over the affected area.

"I'm fine, Dad. Really," you reply, trying to hide your embarrassment.

"I thought you were gone," you add, unable to keep the annoyance out of your voice.

"I just forgot something. I came back to get it," your father explains, his eyes darting nervously between you and Joel.

Your father's gaze is fixed on Joel, his eyes narrowing as he takes in Joel's obvious concern for you. Anyone could see the way Joel feels about you, and your father's disapproval is palpable.

But you're not a child anymore, and you're tired of your father's disapproval. "Dad, I'm fine. You just startled me, that's all. Why do you always have to sneak up on me like that?" you ask, trying to keep the anger out of your voice.

Joel opens his mouth to speak, but the words don't come. He sighs and shakes his head, gathering the pieces of the broken cup and tossing them in the trash on his way out. The sound of his car speeding away speaks volumes.

"Maybe I should go," Joel suggests, but you wave off his concern.

"Don't worry about my dad. He's been weird ever since I graduated from college," you say, dismissing his concerns.

But Joel knows that your father's suspicions go back further than just this morning. He moves to help you clean up the mess on the floor, ignoring the broken glass and coffee spill. Gently, he takes your hand in his, wincing at the stinging and burn.

"Let's get this under some cold water," he says, leading you to the sink. You lean back against him as he guides your hand under the icy flow, your body yielding to his touch.

"Feel better?" he asks, his voice low and soothing. You nod, leaning into him as the cold water soothes your burn.

Joel's heart races as he holds you, feeling your warmth against him. He knows that your father doesn't approve of him, but he can't help how he feels. He's fallen for you, hard, and he's not going to let your father's disapproval get in the way.

"It feels better now," you whisper, your breath sending shivers down Joel's spine. He moves closer to you, feeling the pressure of your back against his aching cock.

"I can't help but notice how your body is responding to mine," Joel says, his voice low and husky.

"Should we start over?" he asks, leaning down so his mouth is close to your ear.

"You mean with the coffee?" you ask, playing coy. But your body is telling a different story.

"I mean starting over without your dad around," Joel clarifies, moving his hand to stroke the back of your neck.

You turn to face him, looking up into his deep brown eyes. "Just stay," you say, biting your lip.

Joel nods, his hands resting on your hips. "I'm not going anywhere, darlin'," he promises. "I'll be right next door, whenever you need me."

You stand there, close enough to kiss, but Joel holds back. He wants to savor this moment, to make it last.

"I meant what I said that day you graduated," Joel whispers, his lips brushing against your ear. "You feel so fucking good."

His words send a jolt of electricity through your body. You feel his arousal pressing against your back, and he grips your hips, pulling you closer.

You plead with Joel to stay, not just because of how the morning has unfolded but because deep down, you need him by your side.

The words you long to say to Joel linger on the tip of your tongue, but the rush of emotions leaves you speechless. Your heart races as you grapple with the intensity of your feelings, unsure of how to express them.

As you run your hand under the cold water, trying to steady your nerves, you suggest preparing the spare room as a distraction. Anything to divert your thoughts and feelings that are swirling inside you.

The tension between you and Joel crackles in the air, the unspoken desire palpable. His longing mirrors your own, creating a charged atmosphere that leaves you both on edge.

"Is your hand goin' to be okay?" Joel's voice is laced with concern as he looks at you, and you nod in response.

"It's just a minor burn from the coffee," you murmur, trying to focus on the task.

"Shall I make us more coffee?" Joel offers, already cleaning up the mess on the floor. But your attention is drawn to the undeniable presence pressing against your back, sending a rush of sensations through you.

Your heart races as you realize the extent of Joel's desire, his arousal evident in every inch of his being.

"I'm not tired," Joel says, his voice low and intimate as he picks up the broken pieces of the mug.

"And I meant what I said earlier," he adds, his tone dropping to a husky whisper that sends shivers down your spine.

The intensity of the moment overwhelms you, making it hard to focus on anything else. You should feel embarrassed, and remind him of boundaries, but the magnetic pull between you is undeniable.

"What did you mean?" you ask, a hint of defiance in your voice, craving his words like a drug.

His lips curl into a knowing smile as he repeats his earlier statement, his gaze lingering on you suggestively.

"You feel so good," Joel says, his words sending a surge of heat through you, your cheeks flushing with desire.

"Is that why you came back?" you inquire, emboldened by the charged atmosphere between you.

"What do you think?" Joel replies, closing the distance between you, the space crackling with unspoken promises and desires.

You feel trapped, torn between your desires and the weight of your past.

Your hands tremble as you press them against Joel's chest, feeling the steady beat of his heart beneath your fingertips. You slide your fingers down, curling around a button on his flannel shirt.

"My dad, for Sarah," you croak, your voice barely above a whisper. Joel takes a deep breath, his chest rising and falling beneath your touch.

"I didn't come back to town just to see your dad," he says, his voice low and steady. "But I don't want to make you uncomfortable either."

He pauses, taking another deep breath before he continues. "What I mean is, what I'm tryin’ to ask you, is could you have feelings for an older man? A man like me, maybe?"

His eyes bore into yours, a half-smile playing at the corners of his lips. You know what he's asking, and your heart races at the thought of giving in to your desires.

"I want to hear it from your lips," he says, his voice a low growl that sends shivers down your spine.

You take a deep breath, your heart pounding in your chest. "I like you a lot, Joel," you stammer, your voice barely above a whisper.

Joel pauses, his eyes never leaving yours. "But?" he prompts, giving you an out if you need it.

You look up at Joel, your eyes pleading with him to make the decision for you. But there's no hesitation in his gaze. He leans in, pressing his warm lips against your hand, and you feel a jolt of electricity shoot through your body.

"Does it feel like this?" he asks, his voice low and husky. You nod, unable to find the words to describe the heat that's building inside you.

"Do you really want me, darlin'?" he asks, his voice barely above a whisper. You moan, unable to contain your desire any longer.

"Yes," you gasp, your voice barely audible. "Yes, I want you."

Joel growls, a low, primal sound that sends shivers down your spine. He presses your hand against his stiff erection, and you can feel the heat and hardness of him through his jeans.

You trace the outline of his cock with your fingers, forgetting all about the burn on your hand, the hot coffee, and even your dad and his house. All that matters is the feel of Joel's body against yours, the heat and hardness of him that you've longed for since graduation day.

"Then come here," he growls, leaning down further and taking your face in his palm. You shudder one last breath of uncertainty before the warmth of his mouth over yours means neither of you will ever have to ask that question again.

Joel's lips are soft and tender, but his kiss is urgent and demanding. You feel yourself melting into him, your body responding to his touch with a hunger you've never felt before.

His hands roam your body, exploring every curve and contour, as if he's been waiting for this moment for years. You respond in kind, your hands tugging at his flannel shirt, desperate to feel his skin against yours.

The heat between you builds, until you're both panting and gasping for breath. Joel's hands slip beneath your shirt, his fingers tracing patterns on your skin that make you dizzy with desire.

Joel can't help himself as he lifts you up and sets you down on the kitchen counter, your legs wrapped around him as he devours your mouth with his own. His hands roam your body, feeling the curves and contours of your figure as if for the first time.

You respond eagerly, your hands tangled in his hair as you deepen the kiss. Joel's touch sends waves of pleasure through your body, and you can feel yourself growing wet with desire.

Joel's hands slip beneath your shirt, his fingers tracing patterns on your skin that make you gasp with pleasure. You arch your back, pressing yourself against him as you feel his hardness against your thigh.

He makes you purr and moan, fulfilling every fantasy you've ever had. Your hands move down to his throbbing cock, gripping and squeezing him through his denim, but you both know this is just the beginning.

Joel has already crossed the line he set for himself, unable to resist the pull between you. He wants more than just a physical connection; he wants all of you, your heart, your soul, your everything.

He envisions a future with you, a life where you're by his side, where you're free to be yourself, to indulge in every desire and dream. He wants to give you a home, a place where you can be truly happy, where the two of you can explore each other endlessly.

As you catch your breath, Joel eases his hold on you, sensing the need for a moment of clarity. Your smile and the flush in your cheeks speak volumes, reassuring him that you're on the same page.

"Holy shit," you exclaim, breathless and exhilarated. Your hands rest on his chest, feeling the strength and warmth of him beneath your touch.

Joel exhales slowly, realizing he may have moved too quickly for you. "Too much, darlin'?" he asks with a chuckle, relieved when you giggle and nod in agreement.

But he sees the worry in your eyes, the need for understanding and space. You grip his flannel, pulling him close for a quick kiss, your words a mix of desire and uncertainty.

"I want this... I want you, Joel. I do," you confess, your voice filled with longing and hesitation.

"Just... not right now, not like this," you trail off, and Joel finishes your sentence, understanding the need for time and space to process everything.

He lifts you off the counter, noting how light you feel in his arms. He watches you pace the kitchen, a mix of emotions playing across your face. He settles on a stool, giving you the space you need to sort through your thoughts.

"I didn't think you were leading me on, and I didn't mean to be so forward," Joel says, his voice gentle and reassuring. "Take your time, process everythin’ darlin’.”

Joel's phone buzzes in his back pocket, and he knows it's your father. He takes a deep breath and answers the call, trying to sound casual. You've stopped pacing but still look dazed, as if you're trying to process what just happened between us.

"Hey, man," Joel greets, hearing your father's voice from his car, still on his way to the office.

"Joel, I'm sorry for how I acted earlier. I guess I'm the one who needs a nap, but I can't afford the time right now," he says, sounding sincere.

Your father has always been honest and upfront, and Joel feels a mix of pride and guilt as he listens to his apology. He knows that your dad will be upset once he finds out about the two of you, but until then, Joel thinks it's best to keep your secret a little longer.

"You don't have to apologize, buddy," Joel says, trying to reassure him. "When do you finish work today?" he asks, already thinking about the time they have left alone together.

More time to take things slow? Joel isn't sure. He wants to savor every moment with you, but he also can't wait to explore every inch of your body.

As your father continues to talk, Joel watches you, his mind filled with thoughts of the two of you together. He knows that things will get complicated soon, but for now, he's happy to be in your presence, to feel your warmth and energy.

"Yeah, I'll see you then," Joel says, ending the call and turning to you. "Are you okay?" he asks, taking a step closer to you.

You nod, still looking dazed, and Joel wraps his arms around you, pulling you close. He knows that the two of you have a lot to talk about, but for now, he's content to hold you, to feel your heart beating against his chest.

The future may be uncertain, but Joel knows one thing for sure - he's never felt this way about anyone before, and he's not about to let you go.

As Joel holds you close, your head resting on his chest, you finally voice the question that's been lingering between you.

"I guess we can't do this sort of thing around my Dad, huh?" you ask, your voice soft against his skin.

Joel strokes your hair gently, his heart full of emotions he never thought he'd feel again. He marvels at how easily and perfectly this moment has unfolded, how right it feels to have you in his arms.

"We probably shouldn't, not yet," Joel replies, his voice tinged with longing. He feels you nod in agreement, and he knows that keeping this secret will be a challenge.

Joel had left town to escape the past, to build a new future for himself and his daughter Sarah. But now, as he returns to the place where it all began, he realizes that his future is intertwined with yours.

He sees a future with you, a life filled with love and possibility. He dreams of a family with you, of building something lasting and meaningful together.

As he holds you in his arms, feeling the warmth of your body against his, Joel knows that this is just the beginning. 

As you and Joel waste no time getting settled in the new house, the air crackles with anticipation. Joel turns the key in the door, and as you step inside, the world outside fades away, leaving just the two of you in a bubble of desire.

Without a word, you set down his bag, and Joel takes your hand, pulling you close. He lifts you effortlessly, spinning you around in a dizzying whirl of passion and need.

The lock clicks shut, sealing you both in a world of raw desire and longing. The house feels like a sanctuary, a place where only you and Joel exist, at least for the next hour or so.

"Aren't you gonna show me around first? I had no idea the inside was so nice," you giggle, your head spinning from the intensity of his touch and the day's events.

"I thought you might like to show me around... your sweet fuckin’ body," Joel rasps in your ear before claiming your lips in a fierce, possessive kiss. Each touch, each kiss, ignites a fire within you, driving you to the edge of reason.

"You tell me if it gets too much, alright darlin'?" Joel murmurs between kisses, his strong arms wrapped around you. You nod eagerly, your body craving his touch, his presence.

With your legs wrapped around his waist, you gravitate towards the nearest soft surface, a luxurious leather sofa in the living room. Joel stops in front of it, but you're consumed by the need for him, the hunger for his touch.

You try to nod, talk, and kiss him all at once, but the overwhelming desire he stirs in you leaves you breathless and unable to form coherent words. "Yeah... fuck... yes, I will," you pant, your body arching into his touch as he explores every inch of you.

Joel lowers you onto the couch, his eyes fixed on you with a hunger that matches your own. He drops to his knees in front of you, parting your legs with a firm grip, his gaze locked on your body with an intensity that sends shivers down your spine.

“I’m gonna eat your little pussy, make you come until you beg me to stop,” he says in a firm tone.

His hands move with purpose, his touch igniting a fire within you that threatens to consume you. You gasp and groan as he explores every inch of you, his fingers and tongue setting your body ablaze with pleasure.

As he delves deeper, his mouth and hands working in perfect harmony, you feel a wave of pleasure building within you, each touch pushing you closer to the edge of ecstasy.

You writhe and moan under his touch, your body responding to his every move with a hunger that matches his own. The room fills with the sounds of your pleasure, the air thick with desire and need.

His elbows prop your knees wide, and half-reclined on the worn leather, you can't help but feel a thrill at the sensations coursing through your body.

The scent of old leather and his cologne mingles with the musk of your arousal, creating a heady mix that only heightens your desire. You're ready for Joel, and you know it won't take long for him to bring you to the edge.

With a rough yank, he tears your panties aside, the sound of fabric rending adding to your arousal. You never knew you could feel this horny, and every moment with Joel only intensifies your desire.

He takes a moment to admire your slick folds, his thick fingers gently parting your lips. You grip his silver-flecked curls tighter as he moves down to taste you, your body trembling with anticipation.

Your moans fill the room, mingling with Joel's deep groans of pleasure. His tongue finds its mark, and you can't help but cry out, your body writhing under his touch.

Joel's mouth covers you completely, his tongue replacing his fingers as he explores every inch of your sex. You're on the brink of climax, your body trembling with need.

"Be patient, darlin'," Joel whispers hoarsely, his voice filled with desire. He grips your thighs, pushing them wider apart until his massive head is pressed between them.

You shift your grip to his broad shoulders, your breath coming in ragged gasps as he brings you closer and closer to the edge.

"Joel... Joel," you moan, trying to tell him how close you are, how much you want him. But all that comes out are animalistic sounds of pleasure.

Joel's body quakes with silent laughter, his voice deep and reassuring as he promises you can come all night. You trace the outline of his jaw, your body trembling with need as he brings you closer and closer to the edge.

If heaven exists, you're sure you've found it in Joel's arms.

AN: I'm such a fool to think that this would be a one-shot... ya'll this is now a mini-series. Don't worry... this will be a two to three-chapter kinda series. 🤍

[yunniestars]

☆ pairing: lyney x gn!reader ☆ tags: friends to lovers, confessions, lyney is whipped and lynette is done

when lyney has a crush he’s either flirty or extremely shy

like he just has the urge to be bold and LOVES using pickup lines and magic tricks to fluster you because he loves seeing you get all shy

though when he’s on the receiving end, usually he fights back

but if it’s his crush he goes all giggly and feels like he’s going to explode

like he could literally just burst

he tries hard to hide it but fails miserably because he just cant contain himself if he’s around you

sometimes he’d ask you if you’re free just so he can be with you, and treats you as if you two were on a date (but he brushes it off as a ‘friendly gesture’)

when lyney likes someone he likes to give them something that reminds him of them

for instance, he once gave you a lakelight lily because its elegance reminded him of you

“it’s as serene and ethereal as you, m’lady” he says as he goes on one knee and give it to you

whenever you two go out alone he loves the time being spent with you because he gets to learn more details about you that you never mention and is seen within your actions

“this is their favorite color, their favorite flower, favorite food… oh and this is the kind of shoes they wear…” he says to lynette, who just feels done with him.

but even if she wants to bonk his head when he yaps about you, she helps set you two up alongside freminet

even father knows

so the day that lyney confesses to you, they made sure to set everything up so it can be simple yet romantic enough

he confessed to you on the beach near poisson, with a dinner table and everything, including scattered rainbow roses and lanterns that lynette and freminet crafted, alongside the candles father lit up

when lyney confesses to you, he fumbles a bit on his words since he’s not used to heart-to-heart conversations like this, becoming extremely open and quite vulnerable

he was afraid of rejection but deep inside he couldn’t contain the feelings he had for you, so he held as long as he could until finally deciding to reveal the love he has in store for you

imagine how over the moon he was when you told him that feelings he had were reciprocrated

he felt like all those nights overthinkng whether you loved him back or not finally had answered thoughts

he gave you the longest hug and the sweetest kiss on the lips, staring at your eyes like you were the most precious jewel he could ever hold.

“i can't believe you’re all mine now, mon ange.”

[ written with love, yunniestars. ෆ ]

a/n: hi hello! thank u for reading my first work here, i hope it was enjoyable even just a little bit. i appreciate that u read it !! ෆ

[v3ng34nc3-w4yn3]

"The odds are ours."

Remy Lebeau x fem!reader

A/n: HERE IT IS!! it got delayed twice but its here!! thank you for all the love, for making this possible. Here's the FINAL part of the main series. To answer your question..no! the series is NOT over! i plan to continue this in little oneshots! tiny extras! now, without further ado! here's the last part! as usual, Angst/Comfort. Enjoy!! <3

Summary: When wade wilson dragged you into the mess you were miserable, mourning and utterly heartbroken but now, after following Wilson and Howlett around for hours, watching them fight you finally get your end of the deal. Seeing a man you thought you'd never see again.

────────────────⋆༺𓆩🂱𓆪༻⋆─────────────────

To say you were pissed was an understatement, you were livid.

You should have stayed. Ran back to the face you’ve been so familiar with for just a few hours. The very face that handed out a clean, fresh start. To forget the pain of the past, to live on with him.

But luck never favoured you. 

..Neither did gravity.

You learned that when your back slammed into a car. The force of it sent white hot pain up your spine and you could barely resist the urge to curl up and scream. First you leave behind a solid connection and now your ribs are broken. Nice.

Wade groans, hoisting himself off the car while Logan just..slumps.

“Holy shit that's deadpool!!”

“And wolverine!!”

..well, at least they don’t recognize you. You're half thankful, half offended.

“You're damn straight it is! Fox killed him. Disney brought him back! They're gonna make him do this till he’s ninety!”

Wade points his finger at Logan. Amusing the children and earning a scoff from the older man. You get a brief meeting of this..Peter guy that Wade has been yapping on about. He seems..sweet. Really sweet. That's a nice change. 

- - - - - - -

You follow the ketchup and mustard pots to the street. Seriously, the pain in your ribs is killing you. You’re almost tempted to ask Logan to carry you..or play dead.

That’s when you see him, the phony bastard. Paradox.

“No! Piss off! You’re too late!” 

He yells at all three of you, waving his arms until Logan snaps at him.

“You’re fuckin’ done.”

“Why was Thor crying!?”

 Wade jumps in, pointing an accusing finger...Well, now you just have to get a word in.

“Why’d you send him to get me!?”

You point to Wade. Seriously..why are you tangled up in this mess?

“How dare you! No one comes back from the void! I didn’t send him to get you! It was his idea!”

Paradox lets out a frustrated little huff. Logan speaks up, interjecting with an almost comedic growl.

“Tell that to Cassandra Nova.”

Oh, right on cue. The beam of orange tears into the empty space. The sound of boots and..it’s the man from before. The one Logan punched real hard. God you just want to see Remy again. 

“Paradox, we have a problem.”

His head twists to the side, A shuddering snap of bones occurs before Cassandra Nova steps out. Tossing the corpse to one side. She speaks, her tone is playful. Like she's bantering with Paradox.

“You tried to kill me.”

You tense up. Just the sight of her makes you feel cold. God, you wish you could just go straight back to Remy. The portal is open. The void is there. You can see it. Hell. Fuck it. 

You move to rush forward, not even paying attention to the conversation ahead..

“Now shoo. Mummy and daddy are having a conversation.”

You’re forced backwards, Flying back alongside Wade and Logan. At Least they’re cushioned by a car. You, on the other hand, smack to the ground with an obvious thud. You don’t have as much strength as you like, You can’t pull through, not like this. Your brain feels fuzzy, your eyelids are heavy and with one last curse from Wade..you fall unconscious.

- - - - - - -

The Fire is warm on your skin. It’s comforting. A familiar scent of burning wood and..Tobacco. Your head rests against the warmth of another body.

You jolt. You don’t even realise someone else is there, neither do you realise your surroundings.

The library. In the mansion. Your home.

You look up. You dread to see what you’ll find. Memories itching to tear from your weary bones. Begging for freedom against the confines of your mind..

But a familiar face stares back. Eyes soft with affection.

“Remy–”

The words die in your throat. You just stare. He takes your hand, bringing it up to his lips to kiss your knuckles. Its soft, a gesture you could never scrub from your mind even if you tried.

“Mon amour..”

He coo’s so softly. It’s a sound you’ve missed. Before you can stop yourself. You throw your arms around his neck. WIthout missing a single beat, he wraps his arms around your waist.

“I–I thought– I thought I'd never see you again! How— How is this–”

He stops you, pulling you away just to cup your face. He avoids the question. Instead..he gives you a word of advice.

“You need t’move on Chère. Dis ain’t healthy. Holdin’ onto de past.”

It makes you feel sick. Why is he telling you this? Does he not want you to stay?

“But– I can’t let you go–”

How could you? You’ve loved him for years. Your affection never wavered for him.

“I know dat. Trust me, Gambit knows all dat.”

Despite his instance, you couldn’t. Why? Why would you? He was..everything.

“It ain’t gon’ be easy..but you gotta try– Gambit don’t want you stressin’ for de rest o’ yer life..”

He leaned down, his hands resting on your shoulders. Such a foreign feeling but oh..you missed it.

He pressed a soft, lingering kiss to your forehead. He pulls away so slowly, like it hurts him to part from you. He’s always been a gentleman, he breaks your heart so softly.

“You deserve good t’ings mon amour..all dat good stuff is gon’ be yours..you just gotta take it.”

The flames in the fire roar. It's sweating hot. Remy seems to panic a little. His brows knit together and he cups your face.

“You’re never gon’ have to carry de burden anymore– everything's gon' go.”

Is it selfish to say you don’t care? It might be. The people, the friends, the history. Gone.

But this place isn’t a home, no without him.

Your Remy. Your Dashing Cajun.

A man who has seen so much but never loves too little.

A fresh, painless start is what you need.

He’ll find you. He always does

- - - - - - -

Your head feels like it's splitting open. God, everything is hurting. Your ribs, your knees, your heart.

Fuck, what the hell happened?

Oh, right..

You sit up, immediately regretting the decision. Pain climbs up your spine, causing you to wince.

“Easy, bub.”

A gravely but surprisingly soft tone comes from the all familiar Logan.

His hand rests on your chest, gently pushing you to lay back down. For a moment, he watches you. Eyes taking in your trembling form. His hand, still resting on your chest, twitches softly. These hands have spilled so much blood yet they’re so tender on the people he cares for. Hah, lucky you. Sneaking into Logan Howlett’s heart, making him play doctor. There's an authoritative yet parental hint to his touch.

He lets you relax before he breathes out a quiet sigh, shaking his head.

“Wade’s playing hero. Said something about a gift to you for all your..hard work.”

You can tell he’s trying not to laugh. A breathy chuckle leaves him as he sits back down in the arm chair.

“How long have i–”

Your voice is..embarrassingly raspy. Seems like it's been out of action for a bit but Logan knows what you're asking him.

“Day and a half at most. You ain’t missed much. We saved his universe and uh..essentially became his roommates. Hah. I see that look. You seriously thought you could get away from ol’ mouth?”

You throw your head back with a groan. Shaking your head. God, first you lose your home and you’re already checking in to a new one? It’s happening way too fast for you to even–

“You think I still have that spare mattress? I can’t remember if i tossed it out yesterday or–”

Wade, completely geared out in costume, casually struts out of that blazing orange portal with..

Remy. 

The Remy you met in that dump–

He’s battered, for sure. A nasty cut lines his cheek and his nose is coated in more of the sticky red liquid. He’s limping. Straining to get inside without toppling over. His usual charm seems to be tossed out the window as he coughs into his fist, shoulders trembling.

“Oh there’s our sleeping beauty! Hi sweetie! Did you have a nice coma? Look what your buddy Wade got ya– and he’s all yours! We can sort out a collar tomorrow–”

He’s obviously making it sound like Remy’s some kind of dog– leashed and collared and to be honest? He might as well be. Look at those puppy dog eyes.

“Chère..”

He breathes out so softly. For a moment..it’s like you’ve known him your whole life. Wade backs up and grabs Logan’s arm. Muttering about needing to “find the mattress.”

You rush forwards, stumbling slightly and without thinking you crash against the Cajun’s chest. It’s so warm, so comforting. A breath of fresh air after the polluted heartbreak. He caves immediately. He wraps his arms around you, cradling your head against his chest.

“There's my girl..”

He speaks so softly, like you’ll shatter under his touch. You know you're crying. Pitiful sobs slip past and he hushes you softly like he did that night in the hideout. It breaks his heart to see more tears but he knows it's out of relief. 

There's no need for words, not when he swoops down to cup your jaw, tilting your head up to pepper your forehead in featherlite kisses. 

He came from nothing. Living off the scraps of garbage and the skills he had. You, a version of you, changed his life for the better. He lost you once before and now he’s never losing you again. This is the start of the best new leaf anyone could wish for. Some call it relighting old flames, but is it really an old flame if it never burnt out?

You look up at him, meeting his gaze. Something clicks in your head the minute he leans in closer..

He pauses, he's a breath away from taking your own but he waits..he needs to know you're ready. It doesn’t matter if it takes years. He’d wait a thousand years if it meant he got to return to your loving arms.

Luckily, he doesn’t have to wait any longer. You meet him in the middle.

His lips are incredibly soft against your own, he tastes like liquor..it's no surprise or a shock. You already knew the taste. It was seared into your mind for good.

He outright groans in satisfaction. You can tell he’s overjoyed by the way he fumbles. He’s not sure where to hold you. It's cute, his hands try to find purchase anywhere they can. They settle on your waist before his arms decide to wrap around you, pulling you in deeper.

He’s breathless when you pull back. Cheeks flushed such a pretty pink. The tips of his ears are red. His brows furrow before he noses your cheek lovingly and presses his forehead to yours.

This is exactly where he wants to be.

He lets out a breathy sigh once more, his gaze meets yours.

“Might need to start hopin’ through portals some more if I get welcomed like dis..”

He laughs softly when you hit his shoulder gently. He pecks your nose in response, squeezing your hips.

“Ah, Behave chère, Remy’s only teasin’..”

Such a fool, but he’s claimed himself as your fool. 

The odds have always been in his favour. And this time, they brought him home.

────────────────⋆༺𓆩����𓆪༻⋆─────────────────

Taglist: @techs-stitches @kaidan-z @tetra-stark @aisling1985 @trinswhimsys

Thank you all so much! i love you all SO MUCH!! <3

[raynavan]

Depot Agents : Uhhh, Sir, whatcha got there?

Emmet, emerging from the tunnel with the infamous giant Gliscor clinging to his back, and the other smaller one following him at his side : A smoothie.

So the idea of Ingo working at the station is just, so funny to me. Ignoring the legalities of pokemon labor, I like to think that both bosses start multiple different types of conspiracy theories.

Like, the Agents see their Boss become incredibly attached to the giant Gliscor. That is not the weird part, Emmet naturally loves his pokemon. The weird part is the Gliscor's unnatural characteristics : impossibly frowny face, silver eyes, huge size, an equal amount of trust in Emmet, and, apparently, *smart enough to do administrative work*

The older Depot Agents are theorizing that, somehow, the Gliscor *is* Ingo. The newer ones think that Emmet projected so hard onto the Gliscor, he trained it to act just like his bro and also somehow taught it to read paperwork.

And what about commuters? Like I get that Ingo would probably only be in the office, but some people would see him walking around. That could be problematic, cause just about everyone uses the subway. Like shady folks who could see an incredibly rare and powerful looking pokemon. Or history buffs who see an *Alpha pokemon *in Unova of all places**

Also side note, you said that Alpha status is a mix of genetics, environment AND a strong will to protect and fight. So then how did it become obsolete? I kinda doubt it was bred out of existence (even if its recessive, Alpha pokemon would undoubtedly be much more likely to reproduce given their everything). Was it due to human interference? As in, humans made it easier to survive in the wild (near routes at least), thus pokemon with less intense genes can survive easier? That doesn't account for the will part, I am very interested in that.

Can Ingo now understand and talk to their pokemon? That'd be a very sweet reunion. Like, everyone is sceptical, but Chandelure confirms it cause it's still the same soul regardless of his body. They'd probably have SO many things to tell him that they couldn't before due to language barriers.

Also, I wonder how Elesa, Drayden and Iris would react. I imagine that Iris' first instinct upon seeing giant bat pokemon that looks well trained and a bit like a wet cat would be to immediately charge right at him to wrestle. Drayden understands that urge, but still scruffs Iris to hold her back cause Ingo clearly looks like he doesn't want to (at the moment).

And more interesting if Skyla (through Elesa) and Clay get involved. Cause they WORK with pokemon of Ingo's types, so I'm sure they'd be fascinated. Skyla tries convincing Ingo to learn how to fly (with her dumb OSHA violating cannons) at her gym, mainly cause she wants to spite Emmet, the train guy, with the fact she taught the other train guy to fly.

I'll stop yapping, but I hope you know this au is genuinely one of my favs and is currently inspiring to write my own fic. Have a good whatever-your-timezone-is.

yeah pretty much fhrueojhtgboerlg

the fic in question

(Big yap under the cut)

in terms of pokemon working- we already have pokedex entries that claim some pokemon have similar, of not more advanced, intelligence than humans. so i would say, generally, if they want to, they can legally be hired for work. but uh... that is also a topic that can differ wildly between my aus and fics- in this one, specifically, while its allowed its not exactly common. im tempted to go into more detail but ill uh. save that for another time ngoerthngo

ingo does all of his work in their shared office, and he... cant... exactly write... he just keeps breaking pens over the papers. the depot agents find it funny that the boss' big gliscor is trying to copy him. emmet definitely leans into the rumor mill and other peoples thoughts / assumptions about Ingo in this case. its much easier to just not say anything and let them think what they want! i can totally see him sometimes chiming in with (true!) information to make people even more confused tho ghioruehgo

im sure the agents all think its really sweet that this big, unwieldy bat seems to have gotten so attached to emmet. of course, then that brings the question of why it seems to care so much about the first person that treated it with any sort of kindness and... well. it really is easier to just lean into unspoken and whispered assumptions.

in terms of people guessing that its ingo- while there might be a thought about it or the idea is brought up, i think that most of the senor agents would actually shut down that kind of thinking. not only is it cruel to the gliscor in question (who would face endless disappointment from others expecting more from it), but its even crueler to Emmet. that's his missing brother- they will not allow emmet to even hear a whisper of people talking about ingo like that. hes not really "over" his brother disappearance (if that's even a thing one can do, really), even if hes coping better now. they would hate to see him turn away from a pokemon that seems to bring his so much joy, just because some of its quirks mirror ingo's.

while ingo does his best to stick by emmet's side, it is rather hard for him to move around that station when its crowded. hes... a little big hugoerhgn (i know i made him "bigger" in the drawing above than previous, but that is more realistic to how large ingo actually is.) ingo would most likely leave the office during calmer hours, or huddle behind his brother on the train when hes running the battle lines. (ingo and emmet have more of a crepuscular schedule when it comes to actually being at gear station.)

people would see him, but he's Always with Emmet. and well... if anyone did try to take him...

neither are exactly pushovers.

in terms of Alpahs as a whole- i think they they do exist, but are extremely rare or difficult to encounter modern day. we actually get a line in-game that says something along the lines of huisuian pokemon being tougher / wilder than most other regions. thus, the alpha populations there were verrry high- lots of competition for resources and a genuine need to frequently fight in order to survive. i like the idea that the reason all pokemon were more aggressive was due to giratina's influence- but by the end of the game, that was resolved. so pokemon began to calm down. with less need to fight all the time, and thus less need to protect all the time, alpha populations naturally diminished. but they are still around- in fact, the trial guardians in pokemon sun/moon were basically alpha pokemon. so they are a lot less common now, but not gone completely. i suppose they might stick to places further away from routes, since they have no real interest in getting stronger with the help of humans like some other pokemon. (basically- there's less of a reason to be an alpha. there was just a very odd amount in huisi due to giratina messing around)

ingo can kinda understand pokemon now! a little! he can understand that some calls have a deeper meaning than others, but maybe not exactly what that meaning is. but he already understood his team pretty well just because he grew up with them. but no, he is, for all intents and purposes, a baby pokemon that grew up Very Fast. he will only really be able to tell things by tone and the calls he understood when he was human shaped.

i don't think iris would be up for immediately tackling the very clearly stressed as hell bat (ingo is nervous about meeting people emmet knows- emmet is Also nervous about ingo meeting people he knows) who is very big and seems incredibly intent on attempting to be the smallest pokemon in the room. i think, as experienced pokemon trainers, all the gym leaders would know to give him some room.

this does give ingo the ability and space to slowly recall things about these people. and also learn about them outside of the context of being a subway boss. i think Ingo would respect them all the more for their patience. to that end, unless ingo himself seemed interested, i don't think hes getting shot out of any cannons lol. Gliscor on the other hand...

anyway- thanks for the ask! it makes me really happy to know Im inspiring your own fic! best of luck with it!

[mysticasrandomhorde]

@creatingnonsense

Great question , so i can start yapping about in game stuff for the Au!!

When the nobles first become frenized, it causes great pain upon the pokemon, their bodies strained from the overamount of power they recieve. The nobles are already pretty powerful beings, but it takes their power up a few notches from where they cant handle.

Due the soul bond the wardens have with their noble pokemon, it affects them as well. It causes their blessing to become overloaded and highly unstable ,along with their emotions, speciffIcally their great worries/fears. Their voices is disorted, both voices of the pokemon and the warden coming out of the warden themselves, swapping back and forth. Neither are aware of whats going on or who they are hurting, just filled with a overwheleming urge to protect and fight.

In order for them to be free both from this pain, they have to stop the noble. But its tricky due to the wardens always staying nearby. They would need to be distacted in order to be defeated.

They are hard to take down, needing more than one person. They are deemed as unstoppable, at least... until a pair of fallers come into Hisui.

Lian: Fearing being left alone or being too annoying. Causes rockfalls and large crystals to spike from the ground to knock back or impale others. Crystal formations appear on the boy's body, making ut hard for him to move.

Dialogue: I WILL CUT YOU DOWN! Am I really too annoying...why do people put up with me... ROCKS WILL SMASH, STONES WILL CUT! Im too odd... WIN, SLASH, WIN AGAIN!

Arezu: Filled with anger, feeling her dreams are unreachable. Covers the land poisonous barbs and plants, dancing down each path. Her own body is overgrown with flowers that drain her, but still keeps going.

Dialogue: MUST BE BEAUTIFUL! UGLY ROOTS WILL TORN OUT! beauty is pain.. dreams arent meant to be made...UGLY THORNS, UGLY THORNS! NO INPURITES IN NY GARDEN!!

Melli: In denial of his pain, doesnt want others to come close as fearing people seeing him as weak. Lightning barrages are frequent, scorching the land around him. Stands on top of the arena, acting as a lightning rod.

Dialogue: POWER,POWER!! T-They cant see me like this! MORE ELECTRICITY, MORE POWER! I-Im no runt!! T-the Great M-Melli always prevails!! THE STORM LIVES, I AM THE STORM, HAHAHAHA!!!

Palina: Overprotective yet saddened mother, feeling as she must protect the pup (now fully grown) from anyone that would hurt them, while screaming how she's failed them. Her fire scorches and burns anything she comes in contact with, pools of lava appear around her.

Dailogue: "PROTECT, PROTECT, PROTECT- I-Im sorry... STAY AWAY FROM MY MOTHER- Unfit, not good... STAY BACK!! I WILL BURN! I.. I have to.. SCORCH!! SCORCH AND BURN!! Y-You cant hurt him!! I wont l-let you!!

Gaeric: lose his smile, feeling he's losing his strength and feeling hes failing his noble and making humself push past his limit. Acts as a moving target to distract anyone from getting close to his stagnant noble.. Cause ice spikes to come from the ground and strong flurries of snow. Body is covered in freezerburns and hardned ice.

Dialogue: Too weak.. Push harder.. TRESSPASSERS.. Break bounds, until lungs crack and bones break... OFF MY MOUNTAIN!! ICE...ETERNAL, EVER COLD... Strength.. will not fail me...

[mybiasisexo]

Entangled - Part 11

Pairing: Chanyeol x f.Reader Chapter Warnings: Language Word Count: 8.1k Author Notes: DOUBLE UPDATE BICTHESSSS!!!!! ok this is my big sorry!!! i was gonna post this earlier today but then coachella happened lol and my priorities changed, but we're back!!! tbh....im so scared to post this 😀. Its just a yap fest if im being honest, so if youre not into that....my bad. but ok yes ill stop blabbin. l adore you all pls enjoy 😩

It’s another hour before you leave the restaurant, impossibly full and content.

The ride back is silent. Most of the crew pass out as soon as you’re on the road, Seulgi being one of them. She uses your shoulder as a pillow. It doesn’t look comfortable, but she’s drooling into your clavicle, so it must be. You can’t sleep, so you quietly watch the beautiful dark scenery, ignoring the occasional prickles on your skin from being watched.

Once you’re back at the hotel, you start saying your goodbyes in front of the van. Everyone’s leaving at different times, so it makes sense to do your farewells now while you’re all present.

It’s bittersweet.

Jongdae is the first to approach you, collecting you tightly into his arms.

“Tell Eunhee I missed her this weekend, and congrats,” you tell him.

“Will do and thank you.”

He squeezes the shit out of you, making you yelp in pain. In retaliation, you smack his shoulder and he hisses, escaping to the next person before you can strike again.

You’re rolling your eyes as Jongin makes his way over, chuckling at his friends’ silly antics.

“He’s mean,” you whine.

“I know,” he coos as he hugs you. You instantly relax in his comforting arms. He really should start selling these things.

“It was good seeing you,” he says, making you sway.

“You too,” you say. “I’m sorry for getting you in this mess.”

“Don’t be.” He repeats. He tightens his arms. “It was bound to happen. I still believe it can work out.”

You smile pathetically. As if he can sense it, Jongin kisses the top of your head before separating.

“Make that runway your bitch,” you tell him. He smirks and bows in thanks.

Baekhyun quickly replaces him, pulling you into a firm hug.

“You’ve made this trip far more eventful than it needed to be,” he says in your ear.

“It wasn’t my intention,” you huff into his shirt.

He chuckles. “Look, I know things didn’t end on a good note, but I promise….” He leans back far enough to look into your eyes and says your name. “It can be. Everyone deserves a second chance. Even you, okay?”

The urge to cry hits you hard and you give him a watery smile. “Thank you, Baekhyun. For everything. I’ve gained some respect for you.”

His jutting jaw is the only acknowledgement he gives your last statement. “You don’t have to thank me. I just want my friends to be happy.”

“You’re hogging her.” You’re being yanked away from Baekhyun and he lets go without a fight, waving goodbye before heading inside the hotel.

“Do we have to say our goodbyes right now?” You ask, staring up at the best friend who you aren’t going back to a shared apartment with. “I’m going to cry.”

Sehun sighs before wrapping his arms around you. “Don’t be a baby.”

You’re already fighting tears, and the lump in your throat grows larger. “I’m really going to miss you.”

“I know,” and he sounds like he’s trying his hardest not to get choked up. “I’ll miss you more. I’ll visit Seoul soon. Most likely for Jongdae’s baby shower. I'll even bring Kyungsoo. I know you’ve been curious about him.”

You laugh through your now falling tears. “It’s not me who’s been curious about your little friend. I’m sure Seulgi will be pleased to hear she’ll finally be introduced.”

“Why do you think I’ve been stalling for so long?”

You share a laugh. “Okay. Jongdae’s baby shower isn’t that far away. I can handle that.”

“That works for you?” He asks sarcastically.

“It does. Just make sure to not leave without saying goodbye again, okay?”

He groans like you’re inconveniencing him, but whispers into your hair. “I won’t.”

Satisfied, you break the hug. Now that your arms are free, you wipe your damp face, laughing at how ridiculous you are. Sehun sucks his teeth in faux disapproval. Shaking his head, he lifts a hand in an attempt to help dry your face, but you knock it away. You’re about to tell him to screw off, but you’re interrupted by the clearing of a throat.

You turn towards the sound and startle slightly when you see Chanyeol standing a few steps away. His hands are deep in his pockets as his eyes flicker between Sehun and you. It’s then you notice just how quiet the portico has become, and check your surroundings. Only the three of you and Seulgi are left outside the hotel, everyone else retiring to their rooms. Seulgi is a few feet away, as though she was also leaving but decided to linger for a bit. When your eyes lock, she throws you a knowing grin.

“Sehun,” she calls. “Let me buy you a shot.”

Sehun seems to catch on quickly. “Oh! Can’t say no to a free drink, can I?”

His eyes never leave yours as he speaks, conveying an important message. ‘Talk to him and get your closure.’

He pats you before sauntering over to Seulgi, throwing an arm around her shoulders to drag her into the hotel.

Now alone, you give in and face Chanyeol.

There isn’t a flicker of the animosity or detachment you saw on the boardwalk the night before, and you aren’t sure if that’s a good thing or not. He’s admiring you, not with disgust or lust, just looking. The lack of emotion has you curious about what's going on in his head.

“Everyone’s said goodbye except us,” he finally says.

You lift an eyebrow. “Does last night not count?”

He frowns. “Do you want it to?”

“No, it’s not that!” You quickly correct. “It’s just that my decisions always hurt you in the end, so I understand if you never want to speak to me again.”

Your eyes water at the thought of going back to strangers with Chanyeol, of losing him again. But, you know you don’t deserve to ask him to stay. If he’s done trying with you, you’ll accept it without complaint. it’s the least you can do after the pain you’ve caused him these past couple days.

He turns away from you, as if he can’t stand to see your tears. One of his hands pats at his thigh as he squints at the beach in the distance.

“We’ve both made poor decisions.” he sighs heavily. “But yesterday was really really bad. I no longer know if there can be an ‘us’ after this. Maybe you're right. Maybe we’ve grown too far apart, and the people we are today aren’t able to love each other like we used to.”

He takes a deep breath and you brace yourself for his rejection. “It wasn’t until dinner that it really hit me, that today is our last day here. I don’t want to leave, to go back to Seoul, and continue living as I did before the wedding. I can’t. Not after seeing you again. I don’t want to leave Jeju with any regrets, and if we leave things like this, I’ll regret it for the rest of my life.”  

“Me too,” you admit. “I’ll regret it too. I already regret so much.”

“Do you regret us?”

“No. Never. I regret where we are now, but I’ll never regret you, Park Chanyeol.”

Your throat tightens from the confession, hating how it sounds like a farewell on your tongue.

You swear his eyes gloss over, but he hides it quickly by turning his head to look behind him. When he faces you again, his features are under control. He tilts his head in the direction he just checked. “Walk with me?”

This is it, and you know it. The last chance with Chanyeol. The inevitable talk you’d been skirting around all weekend. Now is the chance to have your closure, and Chanyeol is giving it to you. If you decline, what is left of your bridge will be burnt for good, keeping you both on opposite ends with no chance of return.

You’re relieved that he offers to walk. When you imagine this conversation, it’s always in Chanyeol’s suite, and you’re honestly not strong enough to ever go back there. The memories are too fresh, and you have zero faith in your self control when it comes to him.

So, you eagerly agree to his request and follow him as he starts walking down the sidewalk. It’s silent as he leads you away from the hotel, taking a path that heads towards the city not too far away. Chanyeol’s steps seem sure, and it makes you wonder if he has a certain place in mind.

He answers your unasked question five minutes later, when you take notice of a faint glowing in the distance. Chanyeol throws a couple nervous glances your way, and the shift in his demeanor has you alert.

You walk a few more feet before you can fully see a white gazebo on the edge of the sandy beach. Golden fairy lights dangle off the sides, making a surreal romantic atmosphere.

You stop dead in your tracks. Chanyeol halts beside you, intently watching your reaction.

“Do you remember this place?” he asks, voice thick with controlled emotion.

You do.

You climb up the steps into the gazebo. A wooden bench wraps around the walls and vines with pink flowers curl around the thin poles connecting to the rounded roof. You stop a little before the center and turn to Chanyeol who stayed back, allowing you a moment to yourself.

“This is where you proposed to me.”

The lights reflect off his round eyes, softening them. Or maybe it’s the memory you both share. A day that you will never forget.

It was your senior trip. Come to think of it, there are many similarities to the one you’re currently on. All of your college friends came to Jeju and stayed at the same hotel, thanks to Junmyeon. You were in a different suite that time, with a different roommate. For five days, the gang ran around the city, exploring and partying. Basking in the last moments you all had before fully joining the real world. Well, Jongdae, Baekhyun, Junmyeon, and Chanyeol had already graduated, but that didn’t stop them from acting like it was their last moments as well. Speaking of Chanyeol, the two of you were deeply in love by that point. You were that nauseating couple that would get lost in your own little world, gravitating around each other in your own solar system. The last day of the trip, he had talked you into having a girl’s day with Seulgi. You were hesitant, because you wanted to spend the last day with him, but he assured you that you’d have him all to yourself that night.

That was enough to have Seulgi drag you around town, taking you to get pampered with a spa and convincing you to let her buy you a dress that she was adamant you had to wear later that night. Little did you know she was in on a plan being prepared behind your back. 

When the sun was setting, you followed her to where you thought you were going to meet up with everyone else for dinner, and were confused when she dragged you to the middle of the beach. That was when you spotted the gazebo. There were pink and white balloons on the far side across the entrance. And in the center, dressed in a fancy black suit, stood Park Chanyeol.

You glared accusingly at Seulgi, who just laughed and shoved you into the gazebo. Your heart raced dangerously fast, nearly drowning out the speech Chanyeol prepared for you. It was beautiful. Chanyeol, ever the poet, poured his heart to you, tearing up as he explained his endless love and devotion.

Then he dropped to one knee and pulled out a ring from his pants. You’d later chastise him for not keeping it in its box. He held it up and it shimmered against the lights surrounding you, but it paled in comparison to the shimmering in Chanyeol’s eyes.

‘Will you continue to be the melody of my life’s song?’ He asked. ‘Will you marry me?’

You were screaming yes before he could finish his question. His smile was blinding as he slid the ring onto your finger and you pounced on him. He held you tightly, lifting you up with him as he stood, and buried his face into your neck as you both cried. You hadn’t noticed all of your friends poking around the outside of the gazebo, popping streamers and cheering as you held onto your soulmate and cried with a happiness and love you knew only a few people have genuinely felt. You were so lucky to have Park Chanyeol. You were so lucky to be loved by him….

You blink.

“That was the best day of my life,” he whispers.

“Mine too,” you admit.

You turn away, not able to handle the tenderness he carries.

He tentatively enters the gazebo, sitting on the bench near the entrance. “I stumbled across it after our… conversation last night. It felt fitting. A reminder of why we’re here.”

Indeed. This was the beginning of the end of you. It makes sense to end this trip here, to end your relationship here. If that’s what you were doing.

You wrap your arms around your stomach, holding yourself together because you’re already at your limit and know you’re about to shatter. Your back still faces Chanyeol, not ready to see the way the fairy lights warm his handsome face. 

“I’m sorry,” he says. “I should have told you where I was taking you. I didn’t mean to upset you.”

“I’m not upset,” you assure. It’s not a lie, but it’s not completely true. You aren’t upset with him for bringing you here. If anything, you need to see this place. You finally turn to face him and the stark difference of how he looks now compared to the last time you saw him under this roof is startling. He wore no fancy suit, only casual khaki pants and a cream button down shirt. His hair blows gently in the breeze, longer and lighter than on that day, and his expression has lost the confidence and joy that was hard to hide then. He is now a shadow of the man that proposed to you, he is a man who has lost the one thing he thought he’d have forever. “It’s just a lot.”

He nods in agreement. “Do you want to leave?”

“No. I agree with you. This is the perfect spot. We can talk here if that’s what you want.” Again, you make sure to let him know that you’re doing this on his terms. He’s in charge here. You’ll be truthful, you’ll answer any question honestly, and you’ll let him be the one to decide how this trip ends.

“Where should we start?” he asks as you make your way over to sit beside him. You make sure to leave some space, knowing how distance can skew your train of thought around him.

“Let’s start with this,” you begin. “What do you want from this conversation?”

“I just want us to not avoid each other the next time we’re in the same room.”

“You think we can be friends?” You ask, genuinely curious of his answer.

He shrugs feebly. “If that’s all we can be. I'd rather have you in my life as a friend than not in it at all.”

You’re not a fan of his answer. Earlier, you told him that you didn’t think you could ever be his friend, and you still believe that. The thought of him actually moving on one day, and having to watch him regard somebody else the way he did you has your heart squeezing in agony. Seeing him with Yerim has been difficult as it is, imagining him with someone he actually loves leaves you disturbed.

Tell him, the Baekhyun in your head urges. Tell him how you really feel.

You already tried to last night. You still have so much love for Chanyeol, but sometimes that’s simply not enough. There’s still too much left unsaid, blocking the path to a future that can possibly end with you back together. The ball that’s always been in your court has now rolled over onto his side, and you aren’t sure if he’s going to pick it up or kick it away and finally put this long game to rest.

But he deserves that choice. Chanyeol has been so strong for you. He’s given you up multiple times, has had his heart broken because of you far more times than you have by him. You owe it to him to choose what he wants for himself. As much as you’d rather part ways on good terms and continue living as you have–without him in your life–if Chanyeol still wants you in his, you’ll suck it up and be present. Because you know for a fact that if the roles were reversed, he’d do the same with no complaint.

Still hurts like a bitch though.

Not yet, you tell your inner Baekhyun, ignoring the way he rolls his eyes. You don’t need his sass right now.

“If that’s what you want,” you push through the tightening of your throat. “Then we should start off easy. How did you end up at Junmyeon’s wedding with Yerim as your date?”

He coughs a shocked laugh. “If that’s the easiest topic, we’re going to be here til the sun rises.”

You shrug a shoulder. “That’s fine with me.”

He watches you for a moment before dropping his head to look at his hands that lay limply between his parted thighs. “As soon as I got Junmyeon’s announcement, I thought of you. I knew you were going to be there, and I couldn’t shake this feeling that you were going to bring a date. The idea of seeing you being happy with your new boyfriend, while I had no one, made me sick. I began to panic, because I didn’t want to be the loser who hadn’t moved on. I wanted you to think I no longer cared. I needed a date.”

That makes you pity him a bit, and you feel bad for calling him an asshole. The intentions behind it are anything but. He was trying to protect himself, and that’s nothing to make fun of.

“And then you met Yerim.”

“And then I met Yerim.” He sinks further into the bench and your ears perk at the name. It hits you then that it’s the first time you’ve heard Chanyeol speak her name. Was he being respectful towards you by neglecting to voice the name of the ‘other’ woman in your picture? Or maybe that was his poor attempt at pretending she didn’t exist while in your presence. Intrigued, you study the way the syllables left his mouth. It’s said with contrition, and that jealous part of you that you’re surprised to still find vanishes with content.

“I don’t know if you remember,” he continues, unaware of the healing already being done to you. “But she works at the cafe near my job. If I’m being honest, I’d been going there for months and hadn’t paid her any mind. I just knew she made the best Americano I’ve ever had in my life! But, after some time, it was kind of obvious she had a little crush on me. Although I was flattered, I never pursued it because I was never interested. That didn’t stop her from being bold. She always made a point to have a conversation with me, even when they were slammed, and I guess she wore me down. Our little talks started becoming the highlights of my days, and I started paying her more attention.”

His story brings to mind a few times Yerim mentioned a cute customer to you. How wild is it that Chanyeol is the customer she’d always tell you about.

“She is funny,” you acknowledge begrudgingly. “And pretty.”

“She is,” he agrees, and you guess your jealousy hasn’t vanished after all. “But, that’s not what ultimately drew me to her.”

“What was it then?”

He avoids your gaze. “She reminded me of you.”

“Oh!” Okay, now your jealousy is officially gone.

“Yeah. Oh. The more Yerim and I talked, the more she sounded like you. Now it makes sense, because you’re close friends so you must’ve rubbed off on her. But, at the time, it really felt like I was getting a second chance. How could I not fall for her when she acted so much like you?”

Your eyebrows raise at that. You’ve never noticed your influence on Yerim, but apparently it’s strong enough to catch your ex’s attention. In a strange way, you are the reason they got together. You’re not sure how to react to the fact. Part of you is sympathetic towards them both, at the fact Chanyeol only liked Yerim because of you. But you’re also flattered and a bit proud for ruining him so much. 

Even though you think you know the answer, this conversation is all about honesty, so you have to confirm something. “Did you like her? Like that? You’ve been pretty adamant about her not being your girlfriend.”

“She wasn’t,” he’s still quick to deny. “And I didn’t. At the start I thought I did. Well, I thought I could fall for her. Maybe if we had time before the wedding to actually get to know each other outside of the cafe, I would have. But the timing was bad. She tried, she really did. But I was too distracted by what was about to happen to give her my full attention, and once I saw you, all thoughts of Yerim went out the window.”

“That’s why you kicked her out?”

“It is. But, I’m getting ahead of myself.” He backtracks, continuing his story where he left off. “The main reason for me being so adamant on bringing a date was to prove to everybody, including myself, that I was completely over you. But, the fact that I started pursuing someone because they reminded me of you should have been the first sign I wasn’t. Still, I ignored it, and when the wedding got brought up, I saw my perfect opportunity. She agreed all too easily.”

“Like fate.”

“It felt like that. Like it was too perfect. Baekhyun said it was a dumb idea. He told me I wasn’t going to get you back that way. I told him I didn’t want you back. As you can imagine, he didn’t believe me.”

“Did you even believe you?”

“I did,” he defends, slightly offended. “I thought enough time had passed, and thinking about you didn’t hurt as much as it had. Sure, I didn’t know if I was capable of ever loving someone as much as I loved you, and I had built some walls after us, but I was ready to try again. And I was going to prove it during dinner. I wanted to make you feel the same as I did. I figured we both could suffer a little, and I…I wanted to hurt you. But, even though I knew you were going to be there, I still wasn’t prepared for the shock of finally seeing you in person. All that bravado I had vanished the moment I saw you. Especially after I realized you did not, in fact, have a date.”

“Technically, I did,” you correct. “Seulgi was my date.”

“Should I have been worried about her?” he asks skeptically.

You can’t miss the opportunity to tease him. “A lot can happen in a couple years. Who knows? We could’ve been inlaws.”

His face pinches in disgust. “That’s a sick joke, Me….”

He lets the petname die on his tongue, unsure if that’s something he still wants to call you.

“I deserve that,” you mumble and attempt a reassuring smile. He takes one look at your stretched lips and immediately starts nervously nibbling on his own. You sense his internal battle, fighting the instinct to defend you while also agreeing with what you said.

The light atmosphere you created dissipates as quickly as it comes.

He clears his throat. “Anyways, that’s why I brought Yerim. I wanted to get a reaction out of you.”

“And did you get the reaction you wanted?” You ask.

“In the grand scheme of things, I guess I did. But at the moment, I didn’t think so. It felt more like it backfired on me. That whole dinner I tried to taunt you by using Yerim, but you never took the bait. You didn’t care at all. That hurt more than I’d like to admit. Especially because your presence was eating me up inside.”

“I’m a better actress than I give myself credit for if you couldn’t see how affected I was. I pretty much went through exactly what you were afraid of happening to you, with an extra brutal layer of personally knowing the date. Trust me when I say you succeeded.”

“It doesn’t feel like a victory,” he shares. “As soon as dinner was over, I realized Baekhyun was right, bringing Yerim was dumb. I was overwhelmed with all these old resurfacing feelings, and all I could think about was you. How was I going to see you again, and what would I say when I did. I made some pretty rash decisions, like kicking Yerim out of our room because I didn’t want you to think we were sleeping together, and then forgetting to have breakfast with her the next morning like I promised because I talked to you the night before. Our conversation was proof that I wasn’t alone in these old feelings, and gave me the courage to attempt to pursue you. It wasn’t a lot, and you were really drunk, but you kept giving me this look I was very familiar with, and I couldn’t deny it if I tried.”

“A look?” You question, having no idea what he’s referring to. He’s never told you about a look before.

“Yes.” He sounds tortured thinking about it. “You get this look on your face whenever you want me to lean down to kiss you. These past few days, we’d argue, you’d tell me how wrong this situation was, and then you’d stare up at me with those eyes of yours. I could never forget that expression, it’s one of my favorites. So, I’d try to oblige you, and at the last second, you’d push me away, and I’d go back to my room and yell in frustration. It was frustrating, knowing you still wanted me, even if you weren’t aware of it, all because of the way you’d look at me.”

Hell. He really can read you like a book.

“So, you ended things with her because of the way I was looking at you?” You confirm.

“I broke up with Yerim because I was leading her on,” he corrects. “But also, I can admit that I was being selfish, and she was in the way of what I truly wanted. You. I knew with her out of the picture, you’d be less…resistant.”

“What did you expect would happen?” You implore. “You’d tell me you broke things off with her and I’d come running back into your arms? Was that the plan?”

“I don’t know,” he answers honestly. “Maybe that you’d lower your guard and stop fighting me. But, I mean, you did run back to me not long after she left….”

You narrow your eyes. “That was because of the wedding.”

“I thought we were being honest with each other?”

That shuts you up. He knows he got you there, if the smug look on his face is any indicator.

“Fine,” you relent. “I most likely wouldn’t have done that had Yerim still been here.”

He bows his head in gratitude for your honesty.

“Alright,” you drawl, fiddling with your fingers. “It’s your turn to ask me a question.”

Chanyeol inhales deeply, and you know it’s going to be a difficult one.

“Last night,” he starts, and you already dread what’s next. “You said that you couldn’t get over what happened the last time we were together.”

“I did.”

“It made me realize that I hurt you way more than I thought I did. You’d mentioned it a couple times, but I didn’t get it… not until now.”

“I may have called off the engagement,” you say. “But it was you, Chanyeol, who ultimately broke us up.”

“Is that how you see it?” He asks, a darkness creeping into his tone.

“How else am I?” You retort. “I asked to get back together and you said yes.”

“I didn’t realize….” He shook his head in denial. “I wasn’t listening.”

“I gathered,” you scoff, growing irritated. “That day I had worked up the courage to call you. It had been a year since we’d last seen each other–”

“Ten and a half months. But who’s counting?” he cuts you off to say.

“Ten and a half months,” you correct. “I felt so stupid because of that. I made such a big show of leaving you, just to beg for you back not even a year later.”

“I wouldn’t have seen it that way,” he says. “I was waiting for that call. To me, those ten and a half months felt more like years.”

“I wish I’d known that then, because I was so nervous. I feared the worst. That you would be angry at me for ending things just to come back so soon. Or worse. That you’d somehow moved on during that time, or realized that you were no longer in love with me. It was that fear that drove me to come up with a cover, an excuse to get you to come over.”

“The ring,” he realizes, jaw clenching at the grim reminder.

“Yeah,” you confirm. “I had it all planned out. I’d tell you that you needed to come over so that you could take it back, but then I’d confess and ask for another chance.”

“You could’ve just told me you missed me,” he says. “It would’ve been just as effective. Actually, more. I would’ve been there faster.”

“I couldn’t just tell you that,” you explain. “I didn’t want to come off desperate. But, I admit, using the ring was the worst thing I could’ve done. I swear I had no intention of giving it back.”

“You were very convincing in acting like it was,” he mutters. “I didn’t even have time to ask how you’d been before you were sitting it on the table. I was hoping you weren’t being serious. But as soon as I saw you, it was obvious you’d changed. It hadn’t been that long, but you were different. You didn’t want me anymore.”

“I didn’t need you anymore, Chanyeol. I still wanted you, if later that night was any indicator.”

“You couldn’t stop raving about how much better your life was now that I was no longer in it! I had to listen to you go on and on about your great new life without me, all while staring at your engagement ring. It was the first time I’d ever seen it not on your finger, and it felt like a punch to the damn gut! My heart was breaking all over again, but there was no hope to latch onto this time.”

His words are enlightening. Despite your attempts at blocking the memory, you remember that night in great detail. You remember how sweaty your palms were from the nerves, to the point you couldn’t even hold a glass of water. You remember the wave of relief that swept over you when you opened the door to see Chanyeol on the other side. You remember his expression, the conflicting emotions of love and hope, battling against reluctance and defeat. Putting the ring on the table was also due to nerves. You wanted to keep pretenses for a little longer, but the way he had zeroed in on the piece of jewelry worried you so much you began rambling.

He never took his eyes off that ring. You remember that clearly. It made you panic, and in a poor attempt to fill the silence, you started updating him on your life. You told him about the job you had just gotten that you’d been dying to get, about your hesitant plans on moving in with Seulgi, about the trips you had taken, anything to get him to react. He didn’t. By that point, you decided to get to the main reason for inviting him. You remember easing into it, telling him you had a lot of time to think about what you wanted in life, and had succeeded in your mission to find yourself. You were ready, if he was still willing. You were ready to become his wife.

He didn’t say anything. Hadn’t moved an inch.

You were positive he hadn’t blinked once during your monologue. Was he angry? Of course he was! That’s when you realized you’d made an irreversible mistake and was now living through the consequences. Maybe he didn’t want you back. Maybe you put too much faith in his love for you. Now looking back on it, you felt a lot like you do at this moment. If Chanyeol was done with you, you’d let him leave. You were going to put him first this time.

‘Chanyeol?’ you called gently. That seemed to bring him back. His eyelids fluttered and he straightened in his chair, pulling away from the ring to finally look at you. You were mesmerized by the richness of his eyes, they were prettier than you recalled, but maybe that was the unshed tears reflecting off the lights overhead. His mouth had fallen open, eyebrows lifted in a question, and you cleared your throat and forced yourself to blink, to break the intimate contact.

‘Are we good?’ You asked, voice shaking in apprehension. You were terrified of his answer, terrified of this being the end of you. Yet, you were prepared for rejection.

‘Yeah, we're good,’ he said. Not expecting that, you stared at him in shock for a moment until reality hit. He was taking you back! Instantly, you felt silly for doubting him. Of course he was taking you back. He already told you that he’d always love you. Feeling giddy with excitement, you weren’t even thinking when you reached out to him….

“I didn’t….” Chanyeol seems to also be back in that living room, reliving that dreadful day. “I couldn’t listen to you brag about your newfound happiness. It was like you were trying to hurt me. So, I stopped listening. Next thing I knew, you’re saying my name and like an idiot, I look at you. You asked me if we were good. I was confused, because you were obviously nervous, but I assumed you just wanted to leave on good terms. So, I agreed. ‘Sure, we’re good’.

….And then you kissed him.

“And then you kissed me.” His eyebrows furrow in the confusion he still feels. “And nothing else mattered after that. Not the ring, not the break up. Just you.”

Chanyeol gives you a Look of his own, and the moment turns tender.

Except all those feelings from the morning after bubbled up to the surface, and you despise the softness of his gaze. 

“That was until the morning, right?” You say bitterly. “Then I didn’t matter at all.”

“That’s not–”

“You left me!” You snap. His mouth audibly shuts at the rise of your voice. “You agreed to get back together, had sex with me, disappeared in the morning, took the ring, and blocked me on everything so that I couldn’t get ahold of you! You claim it was because you were afraid of being used, but that’s what you ended up doing! You used me, Chanyeol, and I haven’t been the same since. You destroyed me! ”

“I didn’t use you!” He pleads. “Stop looking at me like that. You told me you didn’t hate me.”

“I don’t,” you say. “I’m just trying to understand. Was it one last fuck for old times’ sake?”

“God, no! Don’t say it like that. I’ve never ‘fucked’ you. That’s not what that night meant to me.”

“Then what did it mean?” You beg for answers. “If it wasn’t your get back, if it wasn’t you confirming our relationship. What the fuck did it mean to you?”

He meets your gaze, determination igniting within him. “It meant everything to me! That kiss may have felt like the beginning to you, but for me, it was an ending. And I had something to prove. If that was going to be our last night together, I was going to give you every last piece of me. I wanted you to feel my love deep inside your bones, so that you could never forget what it felt like to be truly loved by me. I wanted to ruin you, so that any man that touched you after would pale in comparison. I wanted you to yearn for me on lonely nights, to miss me even if it was a fraction of the loss I was going to feel. I wanted you to still want me.”

Your breathing hitches at his explanation, because you’d be damned if that’s not exactly what he did. Your body awakens from his words, desperately calling for him the way it always has. You battle with the need to pull him close and have him sink into your soul. He made sure to leave his mark on you that night, to carve a hole deep within your heart that could never regrow. You’ve felt that emptiness since, carried it unknowingly. And now that you’ve been reunited, you see that he still holds that chunk with him. Chanyeol still possesses the missing piece to your heart.

The fire inside him seems to diminish once his speech is done. Now guilt slumps his shoulders and lowers his head.

“That morning….” He licks his dry lips. “It was a lapse of judgment.” You can’t help but wonder if he’s told himself this multiple times throughout the years to rationalize his decision. “Leaving you was the hardest thing I’ve ever done in my entire life. You have to believe me. It took everything to get out of your bed, everything to touch that ring. Everything to leave your life for good.”

“But I didn’t want you to,” you confess, on the verge of tears. 

“I know,” he whispers, eyes just as glossy as yours. “I know that now. But, at the time, it was too impossible a dream to even fathom. I had to protect my heart too, you know?”

You did. He had every right to keep his guard up, even if it was at the detriment of your own feelings. 

“And trust me when I say,” he continues. “I suffered too. I hated myself just as much as you did. I still do. Knowing that I broke you so badly…. I can’t even put into words how sorry I am. The last thing I ever want to do is hurt you.” He says your name. “That night was no exception.”

“You literally just said that you brought Yerim to hurt me,” you point out with a sniff.

“Right.” He winces. “But, that’s the only time, I swear!”

He reaches for your hands and you let him hold them. They’re big and warm and the contact soothes you. “Had I known…. Had I listened to you that night, I would have never left. If I knew that kiss meant so much more than a goodbye, we would’ve been married the next week. It’s my fault for not listening and for leaving without an explanation. I hurt us both that day. I’ll accept that now. I’m so fucking sorry, Mel.”

Him calling you Mel again is enough to make you finally shatter. Leaning against him, you press your forehead to his chest as sobs rack your own. He pulls you into his arms, rocking you back and forth as apologies fall from his mouth. You can hear the tears he sheds.

You both cry until you’re dried out, and as the gazebo quiets Chanyeol still holds you.

Once you’ve collected yourself, you speak through a stuffy nose. “I’m sorry too.”

Chanyeol stops swaying at the sound of your voice, so you continue. “I held a lot of animosity for what you did, but I ended up doing the same thing to you.”

“You were confused–”

“It’s no excuse. I left because I was scared, but I still hurt you.” You pull back so that you can show him your sincerity and finally own up for the things you did. “I’ve been playing with you this whole trip, because of my indecisiveness. I’ve been leading you on for days, pushing and pulling away, and you don’t deserve that. No matter our past, you don’t deserve to be treated the way I’ve been treating you.”

“Thank you,” he accepts with a sniff.

“No, thank you,” you counter. “For explaining yourself, and for giving me a chance to explain myself as well. You didn’t owe me anything after what I did to you.”

“You didn’t do anything–”

“You don’t have to protect me anymore, Chanyeol. We’re past that now, aren’t we?”

He grows contemplative at that. “After our night together, much like when you kissed me all those years ago, I assumed we were back together.” As he speaks, he dries your wet face with his hands. You close your eyes, savoring his touch just in case it’s the last. “So when you denied it at the beach, I was hurt. I didn’t understand your reluctance, and I couldn’t figure out what was so wrong with me that you kept rejecting me. It wasn’t until after our fight, when I kept pushing and pushing and yet you still didn’t want me, that I took off the rose tinted glasses and reality set in. Seeing you again, at the place where our love was at its peak, it was easy to forget all the ways we went wrong. You were back in my life, and that was the important part. In my mind, we’d figure everything else out later. Because of that, I didn’t take your feelings into consideration, and I was moving way too fast. I guess, deep down, I knew that I had fucked up and was trying to make up for it. But you weren’t ready, and let's be honest, I’m not ready either. I thought about your offer to give it some time once we’re back in Seoul to separate the past from the present. I’d like to take you up on it, if it still stands.”

You’re relieved to know he finally understands what you were trying to explain to him yesterday. That it wasn’t necessarily a no, just a not-right-now. 

“I would like that,” you admit. 

You both smile at each other, taking in the other unabashedly in your safe space. You catch him glance down at your lips and pout. “Unfortunately, I don’t think I’ll ever not be attracted to you. Is that bad?”

You can’t help but laugh. “I think this trip is proof of how bad it can be, but I feel the same regardless.”

He lets out a sigh full of longing, and nervous about the changing atmosphere around you both, you speak. “Let’s make it a pact then. After we leave tomorrow, we’ll continue living as we had before the wedding, and after some time has passed, we’ll meet up and decide if this is something we actually want to try again, or if we should officially move on.”

“How long?” He asks.

You hum as you think of what a good enough time could be. “Jongdae’s baby shower is in four months. Do you think that’s enough time?”

His eyes take on a familiar shimmer. “I think it’s perfect.”

Chanyeol gets to his feet and pulls you up onto yours. You expect him to start walking back, but instead he pulls you deeper into the gazebo, until he’s standing in the center. 

“How did I do it again?” he mumbles before sinking onto one knee, and your heart lurches into your throat.

“Chanyeol, what are you doing?” You choke.

He holds your left hand, thumb sliding over where your engagement ring once sat. He lifts his head to gaze up at you, and the fairy lights ahead douse him in a golden hue, sparkling in the dark depths of his soul. He now fully embodies the man he was four years ago, and you have a hard time differentiating what year you're in.

Your full name falling from his lips makes you focus on the present. “The last time I was here, I proposed to you, so it’s only fitting I do it again. I’m sorry, but I don’t have a ring this time.”

“Probably for the best,” you wheeze, still overwhelmed.

“Tonight, I’m proposing a deal. That we leave here and figure our shit out, and on the day of Jongdae’s baby shower, we will come to an agreement on how we will pursue this relationship. We will decide to either date again, stay strictly platonic, or become nonexistent. Do you agree to the terms?”

“Yes.” You agree.

Chanyeol smiles largely, and pretends to put a ring on your finger before kissing it. “Then it’s a deal.”

With that, he stands up and you look at him expectantly.

“There’s that look,” he whispers before obliging your unspoken request by leaning down to kiss you.

You kiss as though it’s the last time you ever will, savoring the other and indulging in such a forbidden touch. Whenever you think Chanyeol’s about to break it, he merely tilts his head the other way to deepen it and you giggle and fall right back into your perfect rhythm. A slow warm heat builds from your core, up to your chest, to burn in your throat. Surprisingly, it’s not arousal. It’s something more grounding, more brittle. It’s affection, it’s grief.

It’s love.

The two of you pull apart eventually, staring deep into each other’s eyes as you attempt to catch your breaths.

“There,” Chanyeol says, voice gravelly and deep, as though he just woke up. “Sealed with a kiss.”

You’re smiling, and it all feels so bittersweet, you think you may also be crying again.

“I….” Chanyeol brushes your hair back. Whatever he’s about to say–and you have a suspicious feeling you might know what it is–he decides to keep to himself. Instead, he presses another kiss to your forehead and untangles himself from you. “Let’s go back. I have an early flight.”

The walk to the hotel is peacefully silent. You don’t hold hands or anything, but you’re close enough to have your arm brush his occasionally. When you’re in the elevator, you stand on opposite sides of the cart, just as you had a couple nights ago. He’s smiling at you, and it’s so sweet and boyish, you can’t help but smile back. The action makes his smile grow wider.

When you’re deposited onto your floor, he walks you to your door.

“Sorry for all the drama,” you say as you dig for your room key.

“I wouldn’t have had it any other way.” He grins at you, nudging your shoulder with his arm.

Opening the door, you pause and turn to him. He meets your gaze expectantly.

“See you at the baby shower?” You ask anxiously.

He nods. “I’ll see you at the baby shower, Mel.”

Reassured, you head inside, closing the door quietly behind you. Your heart is pounding a million miles a second, and you take a moment to calm it down with deep breaths. It doesn’t help much. You’re too excited. You’re…hopeful. You know that whatever you decide on the day you see Chanyeol again, he’ll be on the same page. 

You finally got your closure, and are now ready for a new chapter, with or without him. And that doesn’t scare you nearly as much as it had this morning. You’ll never let him know, but Sehun was right. The talk was much needed.

You get ready for bed, and take in the room you spent some of the most stressful days in. You find you’re going to miss this place. Maybe next year you can book the same room, you think as you crawl into bed and fall into a peaceful slumber, knowing all but one of the knots in your rope have finally been untangled.

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