#feral cats fic

[ghostbsuter]

The house of Nightingale & Constantine ( P. 1 )

> next part

.・゜-: ✧ :-

You know, when Batman reassured him (was it tho? His way of using words is a bit... confusing.) of bringing in a third person for their common problem, Phantom, Danny, didn't press nor worry.

He regrets it now, just a little bit.

—

Dick liked Danny.

The small guy has been an absolute delight!

(He isn't grinning when he and Damian duke it out, doesnt watch fondly when Danny and Jason exchange the most weirdest ways of insulting someone or when He and Steph gossip, Cass sitting behind him with her hands in his hair.)

(He can see from the corner of his eye the way Tim hides a grin behind his hand, texting Danny someone rapidly and their Guest laughing at random times, the way even Duke, despite wearing the sunglasses, seems to warm up pretty quickly to their new brother friend.)

(It's doesn't help that he has black hair and blue eyes either.)

Danny has been living with them for some time now, temporarily as it may be, and grew on them all pretty quickly.

Bruce told them when Constantine arrived at the cave, seemingly irritated for unknown reasons, and they all were ushered to the elevator.

There is no noise as they arrive, Danny few feet off the ground and engaged on a hot topic with Steph as they go down the stairs.

The moment Constantine is in sight however, has their resident ghost snapping out of the conversation and zooming in on the man from afar.

It's kind of funny? The way his black hair fluffs up like in a Ghibli Movie, the way his eyes narrow to slits, glowing a faint green.

Many shout in alarm at the sight of agitation (?), Dick sees Constantines own eyes glow a eery gold??

It's like two cats staring down one another, a showdown.

(Someone should record this.)

The two meet down in the middle of the cave, Danny is bristling and John scowling.

"Really Bats? A Nightingale?" The blond man scoffs, pushing his hands into the pockets of his coat, hands roaming for cigarettes probably.

"Excuse me? I thought the line of Constantine died out back then, with the way you handle your stuff." The teen hisses back, a hand running through his poofed up hair.

"Hah!" The Hellblazer gives a mocking laugh, cigar already in hand and lit. "'With the way we handle our stuff'? Weren't the Nightingales out of commission not so long ago?"

The glow might have died out, but the tension only rose higher.

Danny turns to Batman, glowering.

"Asking for the help of the house of Constantine? Are you crazy? Those nutjobs have no self-preservation!"

John's eye twitches at the remark.

"No self-preservation, my ass. Nightingales do nothing but mess with stuff they shouldn't, talk about self-preservation when you have it yourself, pipsqueak."

And Danny? Danny growls.

"All you do is trick every being to do your bidding! One day all of this will catch up to your house and me? I will watch as it burns."

The blonds cigarette snaps in his grip.

"Burn? Me? Doesn't the house if Nightingales hunt the beings we 'trick'? It seems to me that your lineage is already going down as we speak."

The argument (?) continues and the batclan does nothing but watch as if its a particularly interesting tennis match.

(John looks like he's about 5 seconds away from strangling Danny and the teen about to bite off John's head.)

"What's going on?" Finally, Batman steps in.

"What's going on? What's going on?? You said you'd bring in a third person! Not a constantine!"

The bat shows no signs of anything really, when both teen and man whip around to face him.

"I thought you'd know better than to involve yourself with the house of Nightingales."

"I was here first! No take backs!"

"And yet I know bats longer, don't I, pipsqueak?"

"Foolish trickster!"

"Imprudent necromancer!"

(Apparently, beef between two houses of dark exists and they had the chance to experience it first hand.)

(This is one of the many occurrences.)

[bisexualmcqueen]

so i figured out the funniest possible way to do the 'salqueen babies' trope

he then finds someplace better (cave)

cuddle pile time

she's framing that.

they are a crazy but happy family <3

[little-pondhead]

Danny moved to Gotham.

Freakshow is touring in Gotham.

Freakshow knows Danny is in Gotham.

Danny knows Freakshow is still after him.

Danny's faith in heroes has been shattered.

Danny turns to the only person powerful enough to run Freakshow out of town, hopefully for good.

Danny turns to the Joker for help.

The Joker is looking for a new punching bag sidekick after Harley Quinn left him.

Danny is just the perfect person to be shaped by the Joker's hands.

Danny becomes the new Joker Junior.

[proxystranger]

Fuckin creature keeps following him around

[science-lings]

for the prompts: cass and jason cass and jason caSS AND JASON i love them so much i need them to meet on the streets

took me a hot second but I got it

send me a prompt?

****

They had a good system going, Jason was loud and confrontational and Cass was quiet and sneaky. She could also knock grown men out without leaving bruises so that was pretty cool too. It was one of the first things he found out about her. 

Life was rough as a homeless child in Crime Alley, cruelty wasn’t limited to adults, especially not in the darkest depths of Gotham. Usually, they were seen as an opportunity, there was no one to care about them, no one to notice if they went missing for a variety of reasons.

Jason had tried to fight back of course, he tried biting and flailing his limbs in the direction of certain delicate areas but there was only so much a malnourished kid could do against a full-grown adult. At least, that’s what he told himself when he was shoved violently against the dirty pavement. 

At first, he thought he had been saved by Batman, he had heard stories about how sudden and quiet their local vigilante was, never giving a word of warning or making so much as a grunt of effort when pummeling robbers and do-badders into the ground. One moment he had been in the process of getting abducted, and the next, the man assaulting him was collapsed on the ground. 

Jason looked up and instead of seeing the large shadowy figure he had been expecting, there was just a girl, no older than he was, and he was not very old at all. 

“Woah, did you fucking kill him?” She didn’t even have a baseball bat to hit him with, there wasn’t any blood… How the hell did she take him down so fast?

Instead of replying she just made a disgruntled face at the accusation and pointed at the man before making the universal motion for sleep by making a pillow with her hands pressed flatly together and turning her head sideways to lie on it. 

“Can you teach me to do that?” And just like that, they had become inseparable. 

***

Despite not being able to speak or read, Cass wasn’t bothered by how much Jason liked to hang out in the library. It was relatively safe, warm on cold days, and had some cushy old chairs that they could rest on. It wasn’t the type of place to get robbed or even draw much more than the occasional drug deal, which was about as good as anyone could hope for in this fucking city.

She liked to listen to him read quietly to himself, even if the words themselves carried no meaning to her. There were still books she could appreciate, ones with pictures and not just the ones meant for children. There were books of art and photographs and drawings. Sometimes Jason would bring out a big book that translated words into hand movements, and with the help of some illustrated books and lots of pointing, she was able to learn a bunch of words she could use to communicate better. 

It was nice to be heard without the need to speak. 

***

It was just sitting there. It wasn’t the first time it was just sitting there for hours, at least that Jason had seen. It really wasn’t weird for the Batmobile to be parked somewhere around the city while Batman was off swinging around. They had even seen it hidden in dark alleys before. 

So it really wasn’t too stupid for them to take a chance when it was usually just sitting there untouched for hours. They needed money, and Jason had his handy new tire iron which had been useful so far. 

The routine was practiced, Cass kept watch while Jason got to work, if anyone approached, she would take care of it. He appreciated her directness, she didn’t care much for acting or trying to distract them, she just left people mildly concussed or clutching their crotches as they writhed on the concrete. 

She was so dependable, which was why he was surprised and a little betrayed that she didn’t do much of anything when Batman showed up early to get in his stupid car. She didn’t have to kick his ass, she could’ve just given him a little warning before the guy appeared out of fucking nowhere right behind him like some kind of wraith. 

“What are you doing,” a voice thundered without any warning. 

“Shit!” Jason startled and in his infinite wisdom, swung his tire iron as hard as he could at the owner of the car. 

Batman just let the attack connect to his abdomen without even a wince. After a long and quiet moment used solely to let Jason's brain catch up, he realized that the vigilante didn’t even look mad, at least not any more than he was pretty sure he always looked. He just seemed kind of… puzzled. 

Batman sighed, which Jason found rather patronizing, and looked all the way down at him for several more seconds. 

“Don’t you have anywhere better to be?” 

“Not really.” Jason folded his arms stubbornly. Sure, Batman was big and objectively kind of scary but he was also more likely to give him a superman branded band-aid than punt him into the street since he was a child and committing a nonviolent crime. Also, Jason was frustrated enough from being thwarted out of a great payday that it was easy to make anger his most prevailing emotion. 

“Do your parents know you’re out committing prosecutable offenses?” The dark knight grumbled. 

“Yeah, I don’t think they care,” Jason said because announcing that his mother was dead and his father was in prison was just going to get him sent back to the foster care system which has worked so well for him so far. That just wasn’t the type of information he gave out if he was trying his best not to get trafficked. 

“You don’t have parents, do you?” Batman sighed again, like he was accepting something, though Jason wasn’t sure how to interpret that. Instead of answering, he glared as hard as he could at the shadowy man. 

Batman’s cape rippled before Jason’s favorite traitor poked her head from beneath it. She didn’t look ashamed at all, in fact, she looked rather pleased with herself. If Batman was shocked at the development, he didn’t show it.

“You can’t turn us in, they don’t want Cass ‘cus she don’t talk and they don’t want me ‘cus I’m a mouthy asshole.” Jason scowled. 

“Hm, you two make a pretty good team.” Batman looked to the grinning girl at his side, she gave Jason a thumbs up like they were in on something together, aside from what they were supposed to be in on together. Cass looked up at the bat and pressed the fingers of one of her hands together flatly, like the closed claw of a crab, before tapping her mouth with it, Jason recognized it as the sign for eating. 

“You hungry? I’ll get you something if you guys can answer some questions for me.” At this point, Jason knew Cass had made her decision and he was not going to ditch her after they’d been caught. He was not going to let her go with a weirdo in a mask all by herself if he could help it. 

“...Fine. But if you call any authorities on us I’m gonna make sure your fancy car gets more than just a few tires missing!” Jason threatened using the tire iron to point at the bat's face as Cass disappeared under Batman’s cape again, she seemed to like it under there. 

“I know just as well as you do that Gotham’s foster system leaves much to be desired, especially when it comes to children it deems unadoptable. Regardless, it is not safe for you two out here. I… may have somewhere you can stay.”

“That sounds a little illegal.” Jason glowered, but in the subsequent silence remembered that Batman as a concept was also kind of illegal, more illegal than stealing off of cars he was pretty sure. 

“Food first.” the boy acquiesced, despite his suspicion he was not in a place to turn away free food that had not been hidden and mostly smashed in a garbage can first. 

“Hm.” Batman nodded as Cass popped back out with the keys to the batmobile in her hand. Jason had to remember that she trusted Batman for some reason, and he knew more than anyone that she was a crazy good judge of character. She could practically smell bad intentions where he couldn’t even with his trust issues. She just couldn’t be wrong about this kind of thing. 

Batman plucked his keys away from her, visibly baffled at how she was able to take them in the first place, muttering about how he was not letting her drive, before brushing past them to his crazy car. Jason pretended really hard that he wasn’t incredibly excited to go inside said crazy car. He had never seen a car so far from street legal in his life.

‘Like him’ Cass motioned at the man. A confirmation, not a question. She had probably decided it before he caught them, she had probably let that allow him to catch them. She did this on purpose. 

“You better not have fucked this up for us.” Jason huffed. 

At the end of the day he trusted her, more than he trusted anyone actually. 

Though only time would tell if this decision was ultimately a good one. It was definitely the most interesting one. There was no doubt about that.  

[deniigi]

Maul with Brothers and cat (Chicken Foot)

[fistfuloflightning]

jiuyuan w/catjiu (for prompt)

Probably not the catjiu you were looking for… 👀

Homebound SY trying to hide an overly curious escaped lab experiment and things quickly getting out of hand

(also doubles for the Modern AU prompt for Jiuyuan Week!)

[meowdy-all]

Eddie Diaz is like a feral mother cat with her one kitten who has no regard for his mother's solitude, im going to make you socialize with this colony of cats, and a few years later they're deeply ingrained into this colony, and yeah Moms still a little feral but at least she has a husband.

[princeanxious]

Fear the Daycare attendants all you like, but say one mean word to their faces and their handler will swoop in at a moments notice with a silent rage fueled by the many months of mental and emotional rehabilitation these three went through to ensure they could handle being re-released to the public.

Fazbear Entertainment might turn a blind eye to the animatronic rights movements that their highly specialized world renowned technology is absolutely a contribution towards, but this stout little animatronic handler didn’t pour their blood sweat and tears into helping rebuild these bots’ self confidence from the ground up every single day, for over half a year, to just let some entitled prick try and stomp over all the boys hardwork and progress at the drop of the hat.

Faz.Co can deal with the consequences of letting their two most expensive animatronics bond to one specific emotional support human whose made of like 70% protective feral rage at any given moment.

A good fit for the daycare, to be sure, but also a solid reminder that humans are just as capable of being the danger so many others label animatronics to be. (Moon is holding onto their handler for a reason, you know.)

(Edit: second take here)

[night-market-if]

the infinite variances in the human experience are so fascinating to me, bc i've been obsessed w/ milo since i first started reading and to me it doesn't feel like it has anything to do with strength. i could no more resist this man than a sight hound can resist a fast moving object

like, as much as i love mal (and i do, sososo much, he makes my heart so full), smth abt milo makes me absolutely feral. idk what kinda catnip u put in him but i wanna chew on him 24/7. simultaneously activates my prey drive and my desire to wrap him in blankets and give him warm food

anyway thank u for sharing him with us, i think a version of him may have taken up permanent residence in my head (don't worry i would never dream of charging him rent) and i do spiral abt him on the regular (especially when i remember some of the patreon shorts 🥴). my heart explodes when i think abt milo with almost the same intensity as it does when i look at my cats. that is all

The idea of filling Milo up with catnip cracks me up. The fact that everyone compares him to a cat never ceases to amuse me either since the man does not like cats (mainly because of Billows). But yes, he is someone worth going feral over. I think Milo is the kind of person that if he could just get past his own self sabotaging ways, he could love someone so very fiercely.

[shitouttabuck]

several sentence sunday

tagged by @transboybuckley who’s working today everyone send them good calm minimal-emergency first responder holiday vibes mwah

happy christmas eve this is christmas fic that is so definitely going to be a couple days late at Least so please hold on to some festive spirit and read it when it’s up okay please please please

“Ten days is forever, Eddie,” Buck says, voice so forlorn it’s almost comical. “I don’t wanna not see you or Chris for ten days.” “So don’t,” Eddie tells him, bringing his other hand up so he’s cupping Buck’s face between them. “I’ll tell you what I want then. And I’ll be selfish with it. I don’t want to put you in a situation you don’t wanna be in, especially with my parents, but I want to bring you home. I wanna show you where I grew up. I wanna kiss you in my childhood bedroom and make you feel weird about feeling me up under my eighth grade graduation picture. I wanna fight my sisters when they try and show you photos from that year I was really into Nickelback. I wanna wake up next to you on Christmas morning, and spend Christmas day with you and our kid, and I want it so badly, Buck.” Buck’s looking at him with nothing short of stars in his eyes, and Eddie takes a second to marvel at how despite the nature of their relationship changing, Buck’s never really looked at whatever Eddie’s offered him with anything less than this boundless devotion. It’s a lot, but it’s Eddie’s to keep, and he’d have to be—he’d say six feet under, but he’s been forty feet under and still, still that didn’t stop him from reaching for Buck’s love. Death’s got nothing on the span of it.

the usual suspects love u all dearly happy holidays here is a tag if you need something to do away from family or are bored or are not celebrating or want to give ME a christmas present in the form of a wip snippet or a million other reasons @onward--upward @housewifebuck @eddiebabygirldiaz @rewritetheending @jeeyuns @try-set-me-on-fire @chronicowboy @zahlibeth @eowon @anakinfallen @alliaskisthepossibilityoflove @athenagranted @devirnis @buckactuallys @clusterbuck <333

[anjanahalo]

And Now, A Ghost Story 2

Previous

"I'm just saying you really can’t be mad if you leave a bunch of traps around Crime Alley without explanation and find them smashed. Nobody here would know they’re live traps for a TNR program,” Red Hood tried again, exasperated, to explain to the Robin before him. “Which is why I’m here,” Robin stated, also agitated at this back and forth that seemed to only repeat itself. “I even turned off my coms to speak in private. If your territory knew the Red Hood approved of the shelter’s program, they might even help bring in feral cats to be neutered, thus helping reduce the feral cat population.” “The one that everyone knows gets a hefty sum of donations from the Waynes and has one of Bruce’s son’s volunteering there? Yeah, sorry. As soon as a billionaire’s name’s attached, it’s impossible to get people to trust around here.” “There’s no closer shelter, though! Again, if YOU would advocate for the program-” “Hang on,” Red Hood interrupted, activating his own coms. “Got something coming into my line.” “If you think you can get out of this conversation, Red Hood-” “I said quiet!” Red Hood shouted, ignoring how Robin grabbed the hilt of his katana. “Not you,” he stated into the mic of his helmet, putting a hand on his holster in retaliation to the demon brat’s threat. “What is it?” “Got a situation, boss,” said one of his men. Glen, from the voice. “Saw a kid in an alley here. Not a local. He was sleeping in an alley in torn clothes, covered in wounds. You might wanna help find out about him.” “Why are you telling me instead of taking him to a doctor?” Red Hood asked. Yes, he cared for kids, but his men should know what to do if they saw an abused runaway on the streets. “Cause he disappeared!” “A kid gave you the slip?” “No! I mean, I tried to talk with him. I spooked him, and then he literally disappeared before my eyes! He’s some sort of meta, and you know how the Bat is about metas. Figured you’d want to investigate before he finds out.” “Yeah, that’s good info. Give me the last place you saw the kid. I’ll be right there.” “What’s happening?” Robin asked. “Got a hurt out-of-town runaway. Probable meta. I’ll get back to this lovely discussion later. I have actual thing to do.” “I’m coming with you.” “You’re not,” Hood huffed. “You stated he evaded your lackey,” Robin said. “That means this is someone difficult to track down, correct? You need my help.” “And this is entirely without any tit for tat?” “I think I won’t mind you owing me a favor if I aid you in aiding this child.” “Not very Robin of you.” “Tch. Fine. I would aid you regardless, but I also hope you’ll reconsider the TNR program.” “....Sure.” Red Hood unholstered his grapple. “Follow me.”

[jlhynde-insanitybrilliance]

Tommary fic idea:

1945: Tom through some animagus transformation gone wrong gets himself stuck as a cat living in Knockturn Alley. Turns out you can’t successfully become an animagus if you don’t have a complete soul (which given the lack of information on Horcruxes, Tom found out the hard way.)

1995: Harry, escaping from the Dursley’s during the summer, ends up renting a cheap flat in Knockturn above Borgin & Burke’s where he works as a shop assistant. While working there, Mr. Borgin is always complaining about this mangy, feral, cat living in the alley & how its always stealing things from the shop (because Tom had not stopped trying to get back to his original form). He tells Harry that he’s tried to kill it multiple times, but the damn thing somehow always gets away & if Harry sees it to kill it on sight.

Of course, Harry doesn’t do that, he starts leaving a part of his lunch in the alley every day for Tom. Slowly over a period of weeks, Harry earns Tom’s trust (well, not trust, but Tom starts looking at Harry like a free meal ticket) & Harry starts venting out his life to what he thinks is a cat. (Except this cat is oddly intelligent & at times, Harry swears it understands him & wonders if maybe it’s part kneazle.) Until one day, Harry asks Tom if he just wants to move in to the flat upstairs.

& since the flat is better than the Alley, Tom agrees. (Harry still leaves the window open to the fire escape, so Tom can come & go as he pleases.) Then cue all these funny cute scenes of Harry forcing him into a bath, of trying to get Tom to eat canned catfood, of Tom bringing back his stolen items to Harry’s flat & Harry constantly moving them back down to the shop (telling him he’s gotta stop stealing from the neighbors), Harry & Tom sleeping in the same bed with Tom splayed out over Harry’s face, of Harry trying to get him to wear a collar with a name tag so people stop thinking he’s a stray, Ahhhhh! So cute! & when Harry has to go back to Hogwarts at the end of the summer, he ends up taking Tom with him.

Eventually, I imagined that Harry figures out Tom is not in fact a cat & endeavors to help him return to his original form & by that time Tom is utterly smitten. They end up with a successful partial transformation, turning Tom into a human with the cat tail and ears, & Harry is not prepared for how handsome Tom is or how cute he is with the tail & ears. & of course, Tom ends up seducing Harry. He seduces Harry a lot.

But he refuses to wear the damn collar. It’s not happening.

Inspired off of this tiktok :

Whoops 😅 I started writing it. Oh well 🤷‍♀️

[kats-kradle]

Category: Gen

Fandom: Star Wars: The Bad Batch (Cartoon)

Relationships: CT-9904 | Crosshair & CT-9901 | Hunter, CT-9904 | Crosshair & Omega (Star Wars: The Bad Batch), CT-9904 | Crosshair & CT-9903 | Wrecker, Batcher the Lurca Hound & CT-9904 | Crosshair

Characters: CT-9904 | Crosshair, Omega (Star Wars: The Bad Batch), CT-9901 | Hunter, CT-9903 | Wrecker, CT-21-0408 | CT-1409 | Echo, Batcher the Lurca Hound (Star Wars)

Additional Tags: Emotional Hurt/Comfort, Angst and Hurt/Comfort, CT-9904 | Crosshair Needs a Hug, and he gets it, Self-Harm, Self-Hatred, Self-Esteem Issues, Suicidal Thoughts, Suicide Attempt, Guilt, Happy Ending, Angst with a Happy Ending, Crosshair has good brothers, Platonic Cuddling, Sharing a Bed, but in a family way, Panic Attacks, Nightmares, Tech is here in spirit, Salt and Light, I’m so proud of this one y’all

Summary:

You do not have to be good. You do not have to walk on your knees for a hundred miles through the desert repenting.

Healing was a battle that Crosshair had never faced before; a losing battle. How was he supposed to live a normal life after all he’d done?

Crosshair’s hands were made for destruction.

[nenehyuuchiha]

Chapters: 3/3 Fandom: Batman - All Media Types Rating: General Audiences Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings Relationships: Jason Todd & Everyone, Batfamily Members & Jason Todd Characters: Bruce Wayne, Dick Grayson, Jason Todd, Tim Drake, Stephanie Brown, Duke Thomas, Damian Wayne Additional Tags: Lazarus Pit Side Effects (DCU), Creepy Jason Todd, Crack, Fluff, My First AO3 Post, Jason Has tapetum lucidum cuz I thought it was cool, Jason Todd is a Menace, Kinda? Summary:

Jason has tapetum lucidum, but he has no clue.

His family has to deal with the side effects.

Aka: Jason is scaring his family, not on purpose.

[twelfthgnome]

HELLOOO! Hope you are doing well!

I just wanted to say that I really like your work and make a small request if you don't mind. My birthday is in a few days (October 20) and I wanted to know if you could write something about how Alec Hardy would treat you on your birthday?

Since that i really really like your fic about alec, thanks! <3

Thank You For Being a Friend

A/N: happy early birthday, love! Hope you enjoy this fluffy goodness, let me know your thoughts <3

Summary: DS Y/N Warner spends her birthday at work with her boss/partner DI Alec Hardy

Tags: fem!reader or fem!pronouns, fluff, established relationship, cussing/sexual inferences, just fluffy goodness

She'd sat in her car for a full 10 minutes, considering the merits of actually going into work. For one, it was her birthday and that could mean kind coworkers, an easy day, and loads of sweets. But, on the other hand, it was her birthday and that could mean everyone forgetting, giving her the shit end of the stick and being stuck in the office until at least 11pm. She glared at her mobile that still proudly declared that her boyfriend/boss DI Alec Hardy had not sent a Happy Birthday text. Or even a good morning text - though they weren't the sort of couple who did that anyway.

Y/N couldn't quite tell if he forgot or just wasn't a texter. Though she knew both could be true. She grumbled as she unbuckled, going inside like she knew she was going to anyway. The petty part of her knew she wasn't going to announce her birthday, they'd have to be the ones to remember.

The waiting had made her late, and Katie was not shy in saying so as she walked in and placed her stuff on her desk.

"You're late." The young officer said without bothering to look up from her papers.

Y/N rolled her eyes, "good observation."

"You're the Detective Sergeant, you shouldn't be late," Katie said, at least looking up this time through pursed lips and narrowed eyes.

Alec came from his office, spectacles on his nose. He looked quite nice today, his shirt freshly ironed and tucked into a neat pair of slacks. Even though he'd been more freshened in the past few years than his once more sickly ways, he hadn't looked that well in ages. Y/N found her brows shooting up in surprise.

"Lay off, Harford," Hardy grumbled without looking up, headed straight for the front of the office where he could delegate tasks for the day. The young officer's cheeks flushed though she maintained a calm expression as she gathered her notes to listen to her superior. Y/N tried to fight the little smile on her face.

"Few things for today, we've got a list of party goers from the Bakers this past weekend. Looks to be about 30." Alec Hardy went through each of the items for the day, a whole list of things that sounded boring and fascinating for the primary two cases and the smaller things. It came down to the final two, collecting witness statements or parking tickets. Y/N loathed parking duty more than anything. It was boring, tedious, and she quite fancied entirely useless to the whole of police work. But she hadn't heard Hardy call for her yet, and on days when it was something as simple as witness statements he'd shove the parking tickets to her. And on her bloody birthday, she groaned internally. "Warner, you're with me for the statements. Harford, parking tickets."

The DC's eyebrows shot up and she held back a very nasty scoff, "I've already got loads to do with the footprint of the thief!"

"And you'll find time for the tickets."

"You don't need two people for the statements," she argued.

"And I can always find another DC, can't I?" Alec finally said, removing his glasses to look Katie directly in the eyes. She cowered under him, though it was the reluctant sort of cower of someone who thought their opinion to be better. "Right, get to work."

People spread out quickly to do their tasks, Ellie popping by to press a quick kiss to Y/N on the cheek and murmur a happy birthday. They’d been friends long enough that Ellie knew Y/N didn’t want to make a big fuss over her birthday if nobody already knew. But she told her that she best have the best day and to cut Alec some slack, “he’s not great with the social stuff, but he cares.”

“I know, I know.”

Ellie grinned, “you have a great day and pop round mine after? Open a bottle of Chardonnay and watch Golden Girls?”

“Sounds amazing.”

"You ready, Warner?" Hardy asked as he left his office, hair just slightly mused and adorable glasses perched on the end of his nose. She smiled, he didn’t often wear those when he wasn’t reading. She loved them, but doubted he knew that.

"Yes, sir."

Ellie pinched Y/N’s elbow as she left to go to her desk for paperwork. DS Warner tried to stop the glee as she reached for her things to do witness statements with Alec. That was the sort of thing she enjoyed, actual footwork. An interrogation would have been nice but those didn't just get scheduled the way a nice ol' statement could've. She would take what she got, Alec telling the young DC to fuck off and to enjoy her time with him.

They walked dutifully down to her car, and to her surprise Alec plucked the keys from her hand and slid into the driver’s seat. He didn’t drive often. Not that he couldn’t, or hated it, but because when his heart condition was flaring up and the bastard was too stubborn to get the pacemaker, she had become the accidental designated driver. So seeing him drive was out of the ordinary.

“You’re driving?” She asked as she slid into the passenger’s seat.

Alec scoffed, adjusting the heat so it was damn near freezing, “you act like I don’t have a license.”

“Sometimes I wonder.”

“Shut it.” His arm came to rest on the back of her seat while he backed out, and she allowed herself to stare at him, just a little. He was her man, after all. She had a little right to do so.

They drive in companionable silence for just under thirty minutes as Alec pulled up to the home of one of the partygoers. This particular man, Teagan Garrett, was on the middle of their list. Just unnoticeable that he didn’t strike any alarm bells, but with no solid alibi at the time of the robbery. Which left them straight at the middle.

DS Warner enjoyed doing this, even if some found it tedious. She didn’t have to spend her day holed up in an office, wondering what the next move was and not knowing where her information was going. Whenever she was in the office, she felt it wasn’t accurately reaching the people on the ground, but that was another issue for another day. Today was her birthday, and she was going to spend it well.

And about 15 minutes later, she was spending it happily eating a Danish in the car as Alec drove to the next house. Garrett wasn’t suspicious at all, but he made a delightful cherry Danish that smeared red on her lips but she didn’t care. Y/N ate it happily and smiled out the window, watching the hills blend together.

Before they left the car for the next one, Alec touched her shoulder gently to get her attention.

“Darling, you’ve got…” he lifted a hand, cradling her jaw as he swiped at the cherry filling along the corner of her mouth. Then, without breaking eye contact through those spectacles, Alec popped his thumb in his mouth, licking it clean of the filling. Her mouth fell open in slight shock, feeling her body thrum under the energy of it. There was a look in his eyes, a quirk of his mouth, that seemed to suggest he knew exactly what he was doing. But he said nothing more as he gathered his belongings and left the car.

She blinked, took a deep breath and one last clench of her thighs before getting out of the car as well. Alec Hardy was already several steps ahead of her, a knowing smirk before putting on his disgruntled detective expression. Y/N didn’t know how to feel. On one hand she wanted to grab him by the back of his neck and force him to use that tongue elsewhere, and on the other she wanted to bash him with her purse for getting her so riled up before the next meeting.

If Y/N had paid much attention to Alec’s actions throughout the day, she would have noticed that he both treated her and teased her continuously. He’d give her a cuppa just the way she liked, then compliment her so blatantly before they had to leave she was bright red. It happened that way all day, and by 10am she’d even forgotten it was her birthday and that Alec had forgotten as well. It was just a bizarre day full of danishes and sexy eyes - though she certainly wasn’t complaining.

By 5pm, her feet were exhausting her. Ellie’s earlier invitation of opening a bottle of wine and watching Golden Girls until they pass out to the floor sounded like an amazing idea.

“D’you mind if we go to Miller’s? Got a packet to pick up.”

Her brows furrowed, “oh, um, yeah. I’ve actually meant to go there myself.”

He nodded this as good news, squeezed her thigh, then continued the drive. She looked out the window to avoid his confident smirk that he’d fired her up, knowing he had. It didn’t take long to reach Ellie’s, and Y/N noticed the lights in the Latimer home were off. She wondered where they were this time of day, it wasn’t like Beth to go out for dinner.

Alec parked and the two of them walked up to the house, his hand resting on the small of her back. She wanted to lean into his comforting touch.

“Have I told you yet you look good today?” Y/N mentioned softly to Alec, looking up at him.

He let out a small smile, “I should tell you that.”

“You already did.” She pointed out.

With a soft touch, Alec grabbed her waist and pulled her against him. All he did was press a soft kiss to her forehead, but it was enough to make her let out a sigh of relief. She wanted to use Alec as a personal comforter and sleep for the next decade.

Ellie swung the door wide open, smile bright and arms wide to scurry the couple in. Her and Alec disappeared into the dining room as Y/N shucked her shoes off.

“Ellie?” She called, not knowing where they’d gone. “Alec?”

“Dining room, darling!” Y/N walked on sore feet through the kitchen, prepared to badger Alec about why he’d run off the second the door opened. But she stopped, staring with wide eyes.

In front of her, Beth and Chloe Latimer, Ellie, and Alec all stood awkwardly around a table covered in her favorite things. A tastefully done dish lie in the center, the smell enough to make her mouth water. And a chilled Chardonnay already opened and poured into a glass in Alec’s proffered hand.

“Happy Birthday!” The girls all squealed out at once, causing Alec’s face to scrunch up in annoyance. The sight made you giggle.

Chloe Latimer went and grabbed Y/N’s hand, leading her to the head of table, “come, come, I’ll prepare a plate for you!”

“Oh my, thank you all so much. This is astounding!”

Ellie shot a pointed look towards DI Alec Hardy, who offered her the chilled glass of wine. He came close enough to whisper and said, “you didn’t think I forgot, didya?”

She flushed, feeling awful guilty now. It wasn’t that he was a bad partner, she’d never thought that. Their lives were beyond stressful, birthdays seemed superficial sometimes.

“You hate these kind of things.”

He cocked his head to the side, “you don’t.”

She set her glass down to grab his face, but he beat her to it, lips meeting hers with that unrestrained passion she found so pleasantly addictive. His beard scraped her skin but she’d found in recent months that she loved that feeling, and he knew it.

Y/N would have loved to carry this makeout session farther, but then she felt a chip thrown at her face by Chloe, and gingerly removed herself from Alec. Her cheeks were flushed bright pink. Beth and Ellie both waggled their eyebrows at her, then burst into laughing upon realizing they did it at the same time.

It was shaping up to be a rather lovely birthday after all.