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the-broken-truth · 11 months ago

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Missing Piece - Yandere Leona Kingscholar [Part 1]

Summary: Leona finds Yuu is pregnant with his child and demands she get rid of it; claiming he hated children and walked nothing to with the cub she was carrying. Upon refusing to do so, she ends their relationship. 7 years have passed since graduation, and Leona is working at his Father's Company but he feels like something is missing in his life. He finds what he is missing upon meeting a lost boy while on his way to work.

Broken: I don't know every single thing about Twisted Wonderland or Leona, but I really wanted to write this, so just bear with me. Here are some notes explaining a few things in this story.

Notes:

Yuu possesses magical abilities, but she is still human. Her specific magical ability is called Binding Magic, which allows her to use chains to immobilize her targets. However, she needs to be within a certain distance from her target for the chains to remain bound. Alternatively, she can use more magical energy to maintain the chains at a distance. The maximum amount of time the chains shall remain bound is one hour.

Night Raven College is an All-Boys School, so Yuu attends a school for girls.

This is a more modern version of Twisted Wonderland - The Kingscholar Family owns a major company and Leona is one of the possible heirs, but he has an older brother who is the main heir. There are still Beastmen and others, as well as magic, but they live alongside humans in this storyline.

Yuu sat alone in her dorm room, tears slowly streaming down her face as she attempted to calm herself down; stress was not good for her, not at this delicate moment in her life. She inhaled through her nose before exhaling through her mouth and opened her eyes to look around the room, she was currently in the middle of packing; graduation was right around the corner and her time at the school she was attending was coming to an end. She was excited and sad to leave this place, she made great friends and had some good times, but at the same time, there were some times she had massive regrets. One of those moments was happening right now. Yuu's attention was drawn from the room when the phone in her grasp dinged and vibrated against her palm, signaling she had a new text message. She unlocked her phone before opening the message, her eyes narrowed as more tears flowed upon reading the contents of the message and who it was from.

Leona, her boyfriend.

No.

She should not call him that anymore; no loving boyfriend would say the things he said to her earlier in the day.

Leona: You know that I love you, I really do, but I can't accept this; I refuse to. Just get rid of it and we can forget about the fight, we can continue being happy together as we planned, Herbivore. Just get rid of it.

Yuu scoffed at the message before turning her screen off and throwing the phone on her bed before placing her hand on her stomach which contained the most important thing in her life now - her child.

Yuu met Leona during a joint school event with Night Raven College as the main sponsor since it was much larger than the school Yuu came from. She was talking with some friends when she bumped into Leona and ruined his shirt with the drink she was enjoying; he literally growled at her and demanded that she apologize for ruining his shirt, but she stood up to him and told him to leave her be. This is what triggered Leona's Interest in her and he continued to follow her around for about 2 months - he somehow got her number and would constantly text her, asking her to give him a chance and she finally gave in, agreeing to a date at the cafe in the city. Things went well, better than well, and the two of them kept seeing each other until Leona asked Yuu to be his girlfriend; she agreed and life was good for them.

Alas, all good things come to an end eventually; do they not?

Yuu had been feeling under the weather for a while and her friend told her she might want to get a pregnancy test done since this feeling arrived after Yuu helped Leona out of his rut; Yuu was certain that the two of them used protection but she went to get the test anyway. Imagine her surprise when she discovered she was bearing Leona's Child; she was happy and terrified at the same time, she knew Leona wasn't fond of kids but she hoped once she told him the news, he would accept it because it was his own cub.

She called him and asked him to meet her at the cafe where they had their first date; she ordered his favorite drink and waited for him to arrive. Once he did, the two of them sat and talked about things going on in their school lives and possible plans for after graduation; once he was relaxed and Yuu had his undivided attention, she told him the reason he called him there.

The moment she told him that she was pregnant, Leona burst into a fit of laughter, thinking that she was joking, but when she told him that she was not joking and she was really expecting his child, Leona's tone changed and the next words that came out of his mouth caused a nail to hit in the center of her heart and it shattered like glass.

"Get rid of it." Leona growled out, making the young woman sitting across from her shiver in her skin; it was instant, no delay or thought given. He wanted Yuu to get rid of their child and she knew he wasn't kidding; she's been with him for a long time, and she knew that look in these green eyes. This seriousness caused tears to form in Yuu's blue eyes.

Yuu tried to keep herself together as she begged Leona to reconsider - this was another life they were talking about, a life their love had created. She understood that he wasn't really interested in children at the moment but they could adapt and watching the child grow and eventually be born could make Leona see just how precious this life was. Leona growled and glared at Yuu before he rose from his chair and hissed out his next words with venom.

"Either you lose it or you lose me."

As Leona left the cafe, a young woman was left crying alone in the booth, with her hands covering her face. The other customers looked at her with pity and concern. The barista decided to offer her a free drink and muffin, while another pregnant woman brought her a cinnamon roll. She sat across from the crying woman and introduced herself as Mira. They had a deep conversation for about two hours until Yuu returned to school. Mira made sure to give her phone number and urged her to call in case of any emergency or uncertainty. Yuu sat on her bed in silence for a while, remembering the words Mira told her in the cafe before she reached over to grab her phone and unlocked it once again before returning to Leona's Message Thread; upon collecting her thoughts and calming her heart, she started texting Leona.

Yuu: You have expressed that you want nothing to do with this child and that is your choice, that is your right as an independent individual. However, I am my own person and I shall make my own choices, and my choice is to keep my baby.

Yuu pressed the send button and waited - a response arrived 3 minutes later and she didn't hesitate to look at it.

Leona: You can't be serious. You're gonna choose a parasite that's not even alive over me?! You're willing to lose me over that thing?! Use your fucking brain, Herbivore; you need me just like I need you! That thing will only get between us! Get rid of it so we can be happy again!

Yuu typed her response.

Yuu: You told me to choose and I chose - I'm keeping my baby. My child will have nothing to do with you or the Kingscholar Name if that's what you are worried about. They shall not know your identity as their father or even as a past lover of mine. I shall give them the best life I can without you in it. All I ask is that you continue to live your life and find someone who will make you happier than I ever did. Goodbye, Leona Kingscholar.

Yuu sent the message before pressing the button on the upper right corner of Leona's Messeng Thread.

You Have Blocked This Contact

Yuu locked her phone once again before looking out the window at the full moon in the cloudless sky as the stars twinkled in a sea of deep darkness. She closed her eyes and prayed to the Great Seven that she and her baby would have a prosperous life, to give her the knowledge & resources to aid her child in whatever they wished, as well as a prayer thanking them for all they have done for her and everything they will do; once her prayer was done, she placed her phone on the charger before sliding into bed and fall asleep.

As Yuu slumbered, green eyes glared at the screen of the phone in his hand as he sat in the darkness of his room and he looked at the system message with hatred and heartbreak in his eyes.

The Person You Are Attempting To Contact Is Actively Blocking You

He snarled and threw the phone across the room causing it to hit the door and shatter into pieces, the male gripped his hair while covering his ears as the voice started coming back; the voices of doubt that once plagued him. He thought he was free from their curse when Yuu would hold him but now she was gone, she was ignoring him, and he was alone once again. He roared in anger and sorrow as he fell upon the blankets of the bed, tears flowed from his eyes until he opened his eyes once again to see the Lion Plushie Yuu gave him for his most recent birthday. He reached out, grabbed the plushie, and looked at the collar around its neck:

Leona & Yuu Forever

Leona hugged the plushie to his chest, balled himself around the plushie, and sobbed himself to sleep; she'll come back to him. She realize that he was right and she will come back to him. Everything was going to be alright and they were going to be happy once again; all he had to do was wait.

[Seven Years After Graduation]

It is said that time can heal wounds and allow scars to fade away, as well as allow us to improve ourselves for a better future; at least, that is what Leona wanted to believe.

After Leona graduated, he tried to speak with Yuu at her graduation ceremony. He wanted to explain that he cared about her and wanted to make things work between them. However, when he arrived, Yuu's best friend told him that he was too late. Yuu had already left with her parents after the ceremony. They promised to take care of her during her pregnancy and to support her until she could find a job and a place to live. Leona never got the chance to meet Yuu's parents or visit her home. It was then that he realized he had lost her forever. His heart was shattered into a million pieces.

Leona returned home and applied to work at his father's company- while he was not next in line to be the CEO, that title and right belonged to his Older Brother - Falena. Falena was rather serious about his job and family when it came to his wife and son, Cheka; Falena loved his family more than anything and he would do anything to protect them. He hated working under his brother, constantly in his shadow, but Leona was still a Kingscholar and he was not going to let his brother's high position outshine him for long; he would work harder than Falena ever could and continue to rise above.

Leona did just that and worked well with the other employees; he would always do his part and help anyone who needed it, he wasn't over-friendly but he was still respectful to those he worked with, including his father and brother in the office.

During those seven years, Leona managed to snare the President Title for himself while his father was CEO and his brother was COO; the pay was grand and the people in the office respected him, that should be everything he wanted but he could feel it - the hollow void in his heart that could only be filled by one piece, a piece he discarded and regretted ever since.

Leona moved back into his room at Kingscholar Estate and that is where he spent most of his time, lying in his bed while holding his lion plushie that was slowly falling apart at the seams; it was the only thing he had that reminded him of her and he refused to let that piece of her fade away.

Leona's Father attempted to introduce him to numerous women from respectful companies and families but he was never interested in any of them; he wanted her and none of them were her. His father would tell him that he was holding on to the delusion of the one he wanted coming back to him when it was Leona's fault she left him in the first place. Leona would snarl at him before leaving the room to leave Falena to reticle his father in kicking Leona at his weakest point; the younger brother no longer cared about being outshined by his older, his worst regret was letting go of the only person who truly understood him.

One day, Leona was out and about dressed in his suit with his satchel across his shoulder and resting on his hip; his father sent him to close a business deal with a potential new client, they were a rather small business, well, small when comparing it to the scale of the company Leona worked for but their name was getting out there and Leona's Father knew it was important to make the necessary connections the business world.

He walked down the sidewalk, eyes green eyes focused forward as his tail swayed from side to side with each step he took; he was so distracted that he wasn't really aware of his surroundings until he came to a stop when a smaller body connected with the side of his legs, causing him to look in the direction of the child and his eyes widened slightly in confusion.

The child's visage reflected his own when he was around that age with the only exception being the young boy's eyes were the deepest blue he had ever seen. He watched as the young lion rose to his feet and looked up at the man before him before bowing his head in respect.

"My apologies, Sir! I wasn't looking where I was going and bumped into you." The boy said before looking up at Leona with a bright smile; this boy radiated a kind aura that he felt like he was familiar with.

"It's alright, kid; I was rather distracted too, and wasn't really paying attention to my surroundings." Leona said causing the boy to gasp.

"That's not good! You have to watch where you are going or you shall get hit by a car, or a bus, or a train, or even stabbed by some stranger who is having a bad day or malicious intent! Then, your family shall miss you and people will be sad!" The boy exclaimed while waving his hands around.

"Where did you come up with that?" Leona asked with a raised eyebrow.

"Mommy would say that when I was too distracted! I'm working hard to be more careful so Mommy won't worry too much about me and she will see that I a a big boy!" the boy smiled while placing his fists on his hips in a superhero-like pose, causing the taller lion to chuckle at him.

"Your Mommy sounds like a wise woman. What about your daddy? Is he just as wise as her?" Leona asked.

"Oh, I don't have a Daddy. Just Mommy and she is the only one I really need, but I also have God-Ma, and Auntie, as well as Grandma and Grandpa, so I'm really happy! I don't need a Daddy!" The boy smiled again as his smaller tail waved around behind him. Leona opened his mouth again when a voice called out through the air; sending a ping through his heart.

"Leonis!" A female voice called out.

He watched as the boy, Leonis, turned around and ran to a woman wearing casual clothing; long black hair, lightly sun-kissed skin, and a golden necklace with a locket pendant laced around her neck. Leona looked at this woman as the young boy hugged her legs as she petted him between his ears.

"Mommy!" Leonis called out while looking up at her with shining blue eyes.

"Leonis, I have told you numerous times not to run off like that. What if you got hurt or if someone tried to take you away?" She asked - her voice light and sweet but stern and concerned to her child.

"I would have scratched their eyes out!" Leonis said as he raised his claws to show them to his mother, "I am the Lion Strength of Our Family and Grandpa taught me how to fight! There's no one stronger than him and I'll be able to protect you too, Mommy!" She chuckled and smiled sweetly at the child.

"I know, My Sweet Cub, but Mommy wants to make sure that you remain safe. Now, it's time to meet Grandpa and Grandma for lunch, are you ready to go?" She asked.

"Yes, Mommy!" Leonis turned to look at Leona who was standing there watching the interaction between mother and son before he started waving at the male, "Sorry for bumping into you, Sir! I hope you have a prosperous day!" This caused the mother to look at Leona.

Time seemed to slow down around the Kingscholar Male as his breath was caught in his throat when sapphire locked with emerald.

"Yuu?" His voice came out in a weak whimper as he looked at the face of the woman who stood before him, who looked at him with wide eyes but said nothing.

He watched as Yuu reached down, took Leonis by the hand, and started walking him to their car in the parking lot;. He watched as Yuu placed the cub in the car seat behind the passenger seat of her car before closing the door and walking to the driver's door, opening it and getting inside before closing it. His keen ears picked up on the sound of the engine roaring to life before the car pulled out of the spot, out of the parking lot, and drove down the street until it disappeared completely from sight.

Leona stood there as the world moved around him, his eyes remained wide as the pieces started falling into place of realization and 6 critical points were made obvious to him.

Leona had finally seen Yuu after their break-up seven years ago.

Yuu was now a mother.

Her son was a Lion Beastman while she was a human.

His name was Leonis.

Leonis couldn't be older than 6 considering his size.

Leonis looked just like him when he was that age, only with Yuu's eyes.

Yuu had given birth to his child, to his son, and had been raising him alone. He was a father. Leona Kingscholar was a father.

However, that's when his eyes widened once again when he remembered what Leonis told him during their conversation and it caused his heart to grow cold once again.

I don't need a Daddy!

Leona stood there for a while before he started walking once again - he had a business meeting to get to and after that...he had to make a very important call.

[END]

#twisted wonderland #yandere leona kingscholar #leona kingscholar x yuu #leona kingscholar x mc #morden like au #yandere #romantic yandere

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booboodaddysblog · 8 months ago

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Surprise

Part two

Warnings: smut, dominant Colin, long teasing, fingering, kissing

Words: 4896

Marg woke up alone in bed. She stretched and looked at her watch, it was after ten o'clock. Frightened, she quickly sat up on the bed... and immediately knew that this was not a good idea. She felt nauseous and managed to reach the bathroom at the last minute. She knew she wouldn't like being pregnant. Although from what she once read that nausea is usually only for the first three months, after that it's fine. The worst part is that she has to endure these three months hugging the toilet.

She returned to the bedroom and saw a note on the bedside table. She took it in her hand and began to read:

"Marg,

forgive me for having to leave you alone, but I was forced to go to work. Besides, you were sleeping so sweetly, I didn't want to wake you up. It's a beautiful sight.

I would like to ask you to stay at my house today. Rest, eat well and drink lots of water. Don't worry about being absent from work. I will arrange everything. Ah... and we need to find a good doctor to manage our pregnancy. I want everything to be fine. This is a big news for me. I have a flurry of thoughts. I need to start reading about it. I hope there is a book called "Pregnancy for the resistant". And I apologize to you for my behavior at night... I was, and still am, terrified of becoming a dad. It still doesn't get to me.

Have a great day and see you tonight.

- Colin”

She read the letter several times and felt the tears roll down her cheeks. It had been a long time since she had read anything so sweet. She got emotional, plus the state she was in doubled her weepy reaction.

Suddenly she got a notification of a new message on her phone. She reached for it and saw that it was Colin.

“Hey, my love… I'm thinking, you know how we talked about getting married..., that maybe we should think about it before the baby is born. It will be less of a hassle. I'll get the money somehow. Well, it's probably a little early to think about such things, but my overthinking makes me crazy and I had to write you about it. Just so I wouldn't forget.

I hope you feel better."

She smiled softly as she read the message.

"Hey, sweetie.... I understand you completely. I'm also thinking a lot about it. We only found out a few hours ago, and there are a lot of questions in my head that I don't know the answers to. Focus on your work, even though I know it's not easy. And I beg you not to tell anyone about anything at work. We don't need gossip right now. When the time is right, we will tell them everything ourselves.

I don't feel good, I feel terrible. I need sleep, that's for sure.

Thank you for your sweet letter xoxo"

He answered really quick:

"Okay, we'll talk when I get back. I won't bother you anymore. Rest and remember to drink water, I don't want you to get dehydrated or worse faint when I'm not at home.

See you later."

“See you later, Colin”

She went to the kitchen to get water and returned to the bedroom. Sleep came very quickly.

——————-

Colin was counting down the minutes until he left work. He couldn't wait to see his beloved again. He had a good feeling that everything would be fine between them. That maybe the pregnancy would bring them closer together. He cared about Marg. He loved her and could imagine a future with her. Now not only with her. He hoped she forgave him for his betrayal. They honestly didn't talk about it at night. No... it's not worth revisiting the subject. It's just that Colin needs to keep his dick in his pants and be polite and devoted only to Marg.

- And we are planning to get married.... oh my god... everything is happening so fast - he said to himself and hid his face in his hands, sighing loudly.

He was finally able to return home. He packed his documents and drove home. As soon as he got out of the car, he felt excitement. Marg was at his house waiting for him. It had been a long time since he had felt something like this.

He crossed the threshold of the house with a smile and closed the door behind him.

- Marg? I’m home! - announced his arrival and hung his coat on the hanger.

- Oh Colin - Marg came out of the kitchen. She went up to him and hugged him tightly - I missed you and out of this longing I cooked dinner for us - she smiled broadly.

- That's great - he kissed her on the cheek - I see that you feel better.

- Yes, it's better, let's hope tomorrow is just as good. Go wash your hands, we are about to eat.

- Yes sir - he saluted her and went to the bathroom.

He smiled at his reflection in the mirror. He felt relaxed. The very proximity of Marg had that effect on him.

- Something smells really good. Is it chicken? - he walked into the kitchen. He approached Marg and embraced her from behind, kissing her neck - You also smell beautiful - he closed his eyes savoring it.

- You guessed it, it's chicken. Pass me the plates, please.

- I can see that you feel really comfortable in my house - he laughed, handing her what she asked for.

- You know, I spent almost the whole day in here. I rummaged through every cabinet and drawer - she said with a serious face.

- You're kidding... - he felt himself getting weak.

- Yes, I'm joking - she laughed out loud - geez, I scared you - she laughed even louder.

- Do you think it's funny? I wonder how you would feel in my place?

- I have nothing to hide - she shrugged her shoulders and carried the plates to the table.

- Actually... then I have nothing to hide either.

- Then why did you get so stressed? Suspicious - she laughed again - let's have dinner, I'm hungry.

They passed dinner with pleasant conversation. They really had a lot of new topics to talk about. The pregnancy, the wedding... Colin's work had now faded into the background. He himself felt good about it. He didn't like to talk about his work. It made it impossible for him to relax. Everything that happened during the day came back to him like a boomerang and crushed him to a pulp. The only thing he dreamed of at the time was going to bed. But now he felt free and light. The smile did not come off his lips.

- You know what... I think so, when I look at you now, that you will look really sexy with extra pregnancy pounds - he smiled broadly at her.

- Stop, I don't even want to think about it. I don't want to get fat.

- I think you have no control over it. It's rather natural that your body will change. Certainly for the better - he said with the smirk.

- Don't you like my body? - Marg raised an eyebrow.

- No... that's not what I meant. Your body is perfect, and it will be even better. I love your shapes, especially your breasts and buttocks.

- You are lucky, because I already wanted to be offended - she showed him her tongue.

- Oh, don't show me your tongue. It has a bad effect on me.

- Oh, really?

- Yes, my dirty thoughts are raging.

- Ah, yes... your overthinking... sometimes it's probably not so bad - she said with a smirk.

- But, back to your body. You will always be beautiful, no matter how your body changes after pregnancy.

- You're cute. You will definitely be a good dad.

Colin reached out his hand toward Marg and stroked her belly gently. He looked into her eyes.

- I can't wait to see you with baby on your arms, you're gonna be the best mom - he kissed her softly.

- I hope so - she kissed him back.

- And of course I'm gonna be the best dad, my sweet princess... I want to be here for the baby every step of the way, I wanna be here throughout the whole adventure in our way to becoming a family - he smiled at her - but... can I be honest and ask a question? Would you be offended if I'm too honest?

- Ask what you want - she kissed him again - oh I really love your lips.

- Yeah, I really like yours too, I love how they feel when they're teasing me - he chuckled softly as kissed her back - but anyway, I was wondering.... do you know that I can't wait to see you with a bigger belly? Would you mind if I was very curious about that?

- No, baby, I understand that you’re curious about pregnancy stuff. I’m so curious too. I guess my belly will be way bigger then now. Baby will grow up so need more space - she kissed him again, this time more passionate - oh my goodness, I can't take myself away from your mouth, my hormones are going crazy!

- Oh yes, the baby will grow... oh.... and yes, me too, your hormones and the way you look now.... I’m getting crazy just thinking about it, I really understand why you want more now.

- I need you so much right now, especially your lips… everywhere - she groaned.

- My lips, my hands, my arms, my... everywhere, right? - he chuckled and kissed her again, this time harder and more passionately.

- Yes, everywhere, Colin…

- Oh... now I know you're getting crazy... I think all your hormones have taken over your mind... what if I help you with that?

- How? - she sighed.

He smiled and put his arm around her waist, helping her up from the table.

- I think you'll like what I got in mind...

Colin pressed his body firmly against hers, leaned her against the wall and started kissing her again, making sure she didn't move an inch because he didn't want her to feel uncomfortable.

- What else do you have for me? - she interrupted the kiss.

- Hmm... I was thinking of having some fun, just the two of us - he smiled - and I guess we'd have to make sure that the baby doesn't feel anything, what do you say?

- Our baby is the size of a bean. Don't worry, it won't feel a thing - she laughed.

He laughed as well and kissed her mouth passionately.

- Good answer... so what's your answer on my question? Would you like to have some fun?

- You know my answer - she bit her lip.

- That's what I like to hear... let's not waste anymore time then - he grabbed her hand to lead her to the bedroom and start doing what they love.

- Colin?

- Huh? Yes, sweetie?

- You don’t need to be gentle with me today.

- Oh, you think so? Would you like me to be a little rougher with you? - he smirked.

- Do whatever you want with me - she groaned.

- Now, you’re talking…

- Yes, Colin… I’m all yours.

- Now I definitely love that way you're talking today, let's get to the bedroom, I have something you'll love to see...

- What? A gift?

- Hmm, you know that I love buying you nice presents, but this one is more... intimate, for you and I to have some private fun.

- Okay then, can’t wait to see that - she was really curious.

- Oh, you'll love it, I'm sure of that... - he led her to the bedroom and opened the door.

- Let me see it. What is it?

After letting her in, he closed the door slowly and stood right in front of her.

- Close your eyes dear, and don't open them until I tell you to, can you do that for me?

- Of course.

- Good, I knew I could count on you... now, close your eyes tightly and don't peek at anything until I tell you, okay?

- I promise - she covered her eyes.

- That's the girl I know, you're such an obedient one... are you sure you want me to trust you? - he whispered teasingly in her ear and kissed her cheek.

- Yes.

Colin chuckled softly with a slight sparkle in his eyes.

- Alright then, you can keep your eyes closed, I'll tell you when to open then...

He brought his hands slowly to her eyes to check if she hasn't peeked.

- Good girl…

- Yes, but I'm a good girl just for you.

- Oh, is that so? So if I wasn't here, you'd be a very bad girl... who would you rather be submissive and obedient to rather than me?

- Submissive and obedient.... just for you - she whispered.

- Good... that's the way I like my sweet princess. Now, you can open your eyes.

He smiled gently and put his hands on her waist, wanting to see her reaction to what he had prepared.

- Oh… you are… naked - she smiled broadly.

- Yeah, and just let your eyes slowly go down and see what I've got prepared for you... - he laughed.

- Oh… I really like what I see - she bit her lip.

- I was hoping you'd like it...

He moved his fingers over her shoulder and leaned her body against the bed, then moved a little closer to her face, looking into her eyes.

- But now, my second question…

He paused for a moment as he moved his body close to hers more.

- Would you like to do more than just look?

- I’d love to… oh Colin…

- I hope so…

He chuckled softly and whispered in her ear, teasingly.

- But now, we should have a bit of fun... I think you'll like what I have in mind, you will enjoy this...

- Go on, Colin - she whispered.

Also, he began whispering in her ear, stroking her sides and caressing her body with his fingers.

- I want you to just lay back, relax and let me do all of the work... do you think you can handle that, princess?

- I'll try, but I'm sure I can handle it - she kissed him passionately.

- Good... I was kinda counting on you handling this.

He rested her completely on the bed, then lay down on top of her and began to passionately caress her body.

All she was able to do at that moment was sigh loudly.

- Let me take your clothes off.

- Yes…

He did it very slowly, teasing her.

- I love to tease you…

- Colin…

He pulled her a little closer and pressed his body against hers, beginning to kiss her neck and all over her body, going down and taking his time to enjoy every inch.

- You’re so hungry, Colin - her back arched.

- What can I say? I get really hungry sometimes... you're just too delicious to me - he chuckled.

He grabbed her thighs as his kisses went down, and then he murmured.

- Now, I think I'm gonna take my sweet time enjoying all of you, so stay still...

- It's really hard for me not to move when you give me so much pleasure, but I'll keep trying - she sighed loudly.

- I know it is, but like I said... this is all about you and me enjoying ourselves, so you'll just have to let me handle that...

As he continued caressing her body, he suddenly stopped and whispered in her ear.

- Now, I think it's time for me to take this to another level...

- Do it, Colin… - she groaned.

He smiled gently, biting his lips, became a little more serious.

- Okay, now, I want you to stay still and not move at all, I'm about to do something I think will feel very good.

- Oh, I’m sure about that - she whispered.

He pressed her body tighter to the bed, moving on top of her in such a way that their bodies were completely connected. He wanted her to be completely vulnerable.

- I’m all yours… - she wrapped her arms around his neck.

- Good, now I want you to trust my hands completely, okay?

He grabbed each of her wrists and placed them above her head, leaving her fully vulnerable.

- I trust you and your hands - she smiled at him.

- I'm glad you trust me, because I'm gonna use my hands to make you feel so much pleasure... I want you to let these hands do all the work by themselves.

- I want everything, I’m waiting - she tried to move to get more pleasure.

- No, no, no, no moving at all, you stay still, let your body take all of the pleasure I can give you, okay?

- I’m so hungry, give me that pleasure, please - she moved again under him.

- Oh my god, you're not following my instructions at all... - he grumbled at her - you want me to give you pleasure? Don't move right now, not even a bit, or I'll stop.

- I will now be a good and hungry girl. I'm not moving, I understand - she moaned.

He smirked.

- Good girl... now, I'm gonna take care of you and see if you can handle my touch.

As soon as he finished saying this, he began to put his hands all over her body, exploring every inch of her body with his palms, stroking and caressing her skin.

She moaned loudly.

His hands started to trace little circles on her body, every soft touch feels absolutely divine, he's making sure that nothing is going to distract her.

- Colin! - she moaned again.

He felt heat all over his body when he heard her moan.

- Such a good and hungry girl... are you sure you're still not trying to move?

- I’m sure, I promise to be a good girl and hungry of course - she laughed a little.

- Good... you better not be lying to me.

He continued to let his hands explore her body, starting to go higher up her legs. He did not stop teasing her.

She moaned loudly once again.

The sound of her moans filled him with anticipation, the higher he goes, the more the moans increase... He stopped right at her hips and whispered into her ear with a smirk on his face.

- Now, I think you're finally gonna like what I have to show you, right?

- I already love everything - she moans loudly again.

He bit his lips softly as he continues caressing the sides of her hips slowly and passionately, but then he stopped, because he knew she likes it when she can feel his body heat.

- Colin… don’t stop - she whispered.

- Now I think I want to make you feel something even better... I want to make you feel something absolutely spectacular.

- Give me that, Colin!

He nodded softly and leaned back slightly, his hands slowly moved down her body, reached the junction of her thighs and began to caress her there, slowly and calmly, he took his time. She was so wet there and so soft.

- I'm gonna enjoy teasing you for a while... you can give in right now and accept what I'm going to do to you, or we simply can wait a bit more... - he whispered in her ear, squeezing one of her thighs tightly.

- I give in now! oh Colin I love everything you do to me! - she moaned lightly.

- Good girl... now, you wanna know what I have for you?

- Yes! Yes!

- Okay then, how about I just do a little bit more exploring and I show you that with my hands, would you like that? - he sighed - So, I think I'll start moving my hands towards...

- Yes, Colin I want everything you have for me! Move your hands toward…

He put two fingers inside her. And began to move gently.

She moaned even louder than before.

- Oh I know what you want - he kissed her passionately.

- I’m so hungry, Colin! - she bite his lower lip.

He smirked and then whispered softly as he stroked his other hand down her body.

- Then let me feed you exactly what you're hungry for - he inserted a third finger into her, trying to push them in as deep as he could.

- Oh… I’m so hungry for you! - she screamed.

- Love this answer. I’m so hungry for you, and only you.

- Oh Colin! Faster! - she groaned.

- You know this is what I was building up to...

He began to push his fingers into her faster, massaging her pleasure button with his thumb.

- Exactly there, Colin!

- Oh, yeah?

- Yes!

His movements became more precise and faster, more rhythmic. He liked to make her squirm.

- Oh don’t stop moving your hands and kiss me. I need your lips on mine - she tried to move.

- You're trying to move, sweetie, remember what I said I'd do to you if you didn't keep still? Please don't make me stop what I'm doing to you...

- I’m sorry, but you’re making me squirm - she groaned.

- Good, you're supposed to be squirming and begging for more, don't forget that you asked for all of this... - he smiled - Do you want me to stop?

- No!

- Good girl... Now, how about I just keep these hands going the way they're going right now and they'll never stop... Do you want that?

- Oh my God, Colin! - she screamed.

He smiled and gave her a passionate long kiss.

- Oh trust me... I never will... If it was up to me, I'd keep going until I had no more energy to move - he laughed.

- I know you have enough energy to pleasure me now - she kissed him back hungrily.

He moaned and kissed her back passionately and eagerly.

- I love your hands! - she moaned into his mouth.

- I love knowing that you like my hands so much... I'm sure you'd like them more by the end.

He continued to move his fingers inside her hot insides, while massaging her breasts with his other hand. He sucked on her nipples. He was so hungry.

- Oh! This is what I want! Exactly there!

He returned to gently biting her neck and licking her.

- You’re a master in this, Colin. Don’t you dare to stop - she moaned softly.

- I swear, I won't... I'd never stop doing this to you...

He hugged his body tighter to hers, and then pulled her body closer to his, continuing to touch her there slowly and passionately, his hands never stopping.

- I’m about to…, you exactly know what! - she almost screamed.

- Oh yeah? You're already this close, huh?

- Yes! - she started to squirm, and breathe heavily, she was so close.

- Keep still, let's see if you can stop yourself... - he kissed her - you can't move at all now, okay?

- I promise not to move, but don’t stop, please - she screamed loudly.

- Then don't move and don't make a noise, okay? - he whispered to her ear.

- It’s so hard to be quiet, you’re so good to me - she moans loudly.

- It doesn't matter... keep still and quiet, okay? Or I'm gonna have to use my hands in such a way that won't let you make sounds anymore.

- Oh make me quiet, Colin. It’s so hard to make no noises - she moaned loudly.

- You sure about that? It might not be as fun as you imagine... - he began stroking her lower lip.

- Do it, please! - she bit her lip to be quite.

Once again bent over her body, his face now right in front of hers.

- You asked for it...

He pressed his hands firmly on top of her mouth and started to cover her with his body, stopping her from making any sounds, he pulled back slightly.

- I'm not gonna let you make a sound until you beg me to stop.

She nodded her head as a sign that she understood.

He pulled back a bit and give her a deep and long kiss. He laughed and stooped making out with her for a second. He was breathing heavily.

- Now, we're playing that game aren't we? So, let me hear you, how far can you go without begging me to stop? Be honest with me, okay?

Again she nodded her head to confirm.

- Good girl…

He sighs softly and let's go from her mouth.

- So, what do you think? You can take more of this?

- I’m still hungry, so yes I do - she moans softly.

- Perfect response, that's what I wanted to hear...

He moved his hands back to her mouth again, covered them to shut her up and pulled her body very close to his, his hips are all up to her body now, he's going to move just a little bit more just to get her even more hungry.

She was breathing hard through her nose, her body trembling with delight.

- Oh god, you're trembling, I can feel it through my body... and you're breathing so deeply and quickly... - he whispered.

She sighed deeply and closed her eyes, waiting for more delights.

He leaned forward a bit more, starting to move his hands all over her body again, his hips now pressed against her.

Colin heard a loud moan of delight.

- Let's see how much you can take, before I give you more of what you're craving... - he whispered to her ear.

She looked at him with wide-open eyes and nodded.

Again he began to massage her hot entrance. He pushed her rhythmically and continuously. Again he felt her trembling and squirming.

Her body trembled, she was close to fulfillment. She closed her eyes.

- Oh, you're close again, aren't you? I can tell... I know your body so well by now...

Her body arched as she reached fulfillment. She let out a loud and long sigh. She breathed hard trying to calm down after such a strong sensation.

He moved back slightly, no longer covering her mouth with his fingers, and let her breathe, watching her carefully, waiting.... waited for her to signal him that she wanted more.

Still breathing heavily, she slowly calmed down. She smiled at Colin, seeing the expression on his face.

- Don't look at me like that, so obscene, you made me tired. I don't even have the strength to move - she laughed.

He laughed softly and hugged her, his face has a satisfied look as he smiles softly at her.

- Oh, that was quite the reaction, I'd say I did my job well... do you want more or do you think you've had enough for now?

- That's enough for today. You really made me tired. But... Colin? What about your pleasure? You gave me so much joy, and all you got return was my pleasure - she smiled at him.

- Oh, trust me when I say this... It was worth it, I don't mind not getting much in return if it means that I get to give you what you enjoy the most - he kissed her softly.

- Oh, you are so sweet. I promise to make you happy soon too. You have so much stress at work, you need to relax - she stroked his head.

- I have all of the relaxation I need right here with you... It's always a good de-stresser after a long day at work... How about we just keep relaxing now? - he closed his eyes and hugged her.

- So you're tired after giving me so much pleasure? I knew it! You need rest, my lover. Let's get some sleep. But first, please get off me, you're heavy - she laughed and kissed his forehead.

- Sorry, sweetie... you're right, I do need some rest... and I can tell I'll sleep like a baby because of this...

He slowly moves away from her and lays down next to her. He closes his eyes and sighs deeply.

- I love you, Mr Zabel.

- I love you too, my dear.

30 notes · View notes

nowoyas · 2 months ago

Text

Koi no Yokan 13: get your brain back (nishinoya yuu/reader)

First - Prev - Next - M.list - Ao3

A/N: due to yesterday's URL change, inter-chapter links are not currently working. I am in the process of fixing these, but have literally ninety-four fic posts to fix that with, most of which are linked in multiple places. the links on this post and in the new masterlist will work, but I would recommend reading on ao3 in the meantime until this note disappears.

Summary: You are brought home from the hospital to the Nishinoya household.

Warnings: blanket series warnings, mentions of/implied child abuse and neglect (non-explicit)

Words: 4500+

Noya to [name] at 23:49

Noya: [image attached. Image description: Soba as a kitten, curled up in the center of a futon. Her body forms a perfectly circular shape.]

Noya: hope everything's okay at the hospital.

Noya: here's soba stealing my futon when she was a kitten. hope she brings a little luck so you can sleep half as good as she does

Noya: might be difficult though, she's a good sleeper

Noya to [name] at 00:01

Noya: usually i'm a good sleeper too [message not sent]

Noya to [name] at 6:48

Noya: [image attached. Image description: Soba laying on her back in the traditional maneki-neko pose, stomach exposed with one paw up and the other curled against her chest. Her stomach is composed primarily of extreme fluff.]

Noya: a good luck soba to encourage your swift recovery

[name] to Noya at 7:03

[name]: :)

Noya to [name] at 7:10²⁷

Noya: [name]-san WHAT are you doing looking at your phone

Noya: the doctors said no screens! >:(

[name]: only if it asorsens my sympotoims

[name]: soba could NEVER do that tom e

[name]: sorry for yops im reading your texts and then reponsding without looking so im not using up m screntime

Noya: you're supposed to be RESTING!!!

[name]: was

[name]: yop ten worst ways to wake up

[name]: number one; forgetting to tunr off your wakeup alarm so yup get up at like six thirty in the fucking am with the worst heaxache youve had in your life and your phone screaming in your ear

[name]: tried fo r abit to get back to sleep but mostly ive just been trying to recover from the fucking wakeup alarm

Noya: oh my god

Noya: can you take phone calls? I don't wanna make your head worse

[name]: one sec

Noya's in the gym, but practice isn't for another twenty minutes, technically, and he's not sure anyone will blame him for having his phone this morning, let alone when he answers on the first ring. At worst, he gets a raised eyebrow from Chikara, but when he speaks in a soft, worried tone, it's immediately brushed off.

"Hey, how are you feeling?"

Your voice comes through a moment later. It's strained, and he's almost certain you've been crying, but he elects not to comment. "I'm alright, but I died."

He laughs softly, scurrying outside of the gym so he has room to pace. "You're doing better, then."

"Mm. Head still hurts like hell, but I haven't had any like… major events to justify keeping me here. They'll probably let me out on time."

"That's great! Other than the alarm incident, did you sleep okay?"

"Yeah, actually." You pause. For some reason, he holds his breath. "I guess Soba helped. Thanks."

"Of course. Listen, though, Okaa-san's not budging on you staying with us, at least until you're able to return to school and stuff. She wants to know what you want for dinner tonight."

Another pause. "Karaage. Is she… I mean… is she cool?"

He nods, forgetting for a moment that you can't see him. "She is. She raised me, you know."

A soft laugh comes through, barely picking up. "She must be really cool then."

"She's got a few options for you for how we're handling everything, but I think she's gonna talk to you more about those when we pick you up from the hospital. For now, you just focus on trying to rest, alright?"

There's a voice in the background—no one he recognizes, not that he would—that he can't quite make out, just as Ryu's head pokes out of the gym to grab him.

"Practice is starting," Ryu says in a low voice. Noya nods, gestures to the phone and holds up a single finger. That's all it takes to get a nod of understanding in reply.

He waits patiently until you're done talking to the stranger—your voice pitches into a whine, all I know, I'm sorry, just let me say goodbye first, a bit muffled with a shuffling sound that makes him think you're covering the speaker with one hand.

Another shuffle, and you return to him. "Okay, sorry—"

"I have to go," the two of you say in unison.

You huff. "Are you just trying to make me feel better for leaving?"

"No. Practice is starting. Ryu just came to get me."

"…right. That was a nurse on my end. They're yelling at me for getting out of bed when I'm still unsteady. Is it just your mom coming to pick me up later?"

"I'm gonna head out early to come with her."

"Senpai…"

"Lecture me when you're not getting lectured by nurses for slipping out of bed," he replies, cheeky.

"…fine. Make sure to tell me about practice later, okay? And tell Yachi-san and Shimizu-senpai I'm sorry I'm not there to help out, but I'll be back soon. And tell Hinata I died. And—"

He cuts you off with a laugh. "I'll tell them all that. You go rest."

When the both of you hang up, he takes the time to send another picture of Soba—this one asleep, covering her face with her paws—and runs inside, tucking his phone away to join practice.

Noya and his mom arrive to pick you up at hour 24 on the dot, and you have never been more excited to see a soul in your life. You're checked out, brought back to Noya's. His mom doesn't say much to you on the drive back, and you regret to admit that you don't really remember much of meeting her yesterday.

Noya is the one who fills the silence for the most part—he tells you all about how practice today went, the blow-by-blow of their little scrimmages, how he started working on the thing he was telling you about yesterday.

You blink at him blankly. "I, uh… sorry, but I gotta ask. I remember almost nothing from yesterday…"

"Oh! I'll show you a video when we get back—I mean, if your head can handle a few minutes with a screen," he adds, glancing nervously at the sharp look his mom is giving him in the rear-view.

One of many restrictions: you're not allowed screens. Or reading. Or thinking. Or fun. Also, no exercise, no texting (not even without looking at the screen, your nurse had chided after you'd tried to respond to your bonus morning Soba), and basically anything involving any amount of focus. They'd had the audacity to follow that up with oh, but you'll make things worse if you rest completely without doing anything at all, so you can still do things!. In other words:

if something hurts, don't do it

do not take painkillers for the hurt

everything hurts

doing nothing will make things worse and cause recovery to take longer

Or, in still other words: you expect to experience a complete mental breakdown by the end of the day.

You meet Noya's mom's eyes in the rear-view again. You don't remember what you said to her yesterday, but you do recognize her as the lady who runs your butcher shop of choice. You might need to start getting your meat somewhere else.

"Um," you say, voice coming out weaker than you'd like. "Thank you for all this, ma'am. I'm sorry for the trouble."

She waves one hand dismissively as she pulls into your neighborhood. "Don't even mention it, sweetheart. We'll talk more once we're inside."

"But…"

A single firm look shuts you up.

How Noya got to be the way he is with a mom like that, you'll never understand.

"Oh, that reminds me," Noya blurts suddenly. "You don't remember what happened, right?"

You shake your head. "I mostly remember stuff after it… I think? It's all kinda soup right now."

"Shouyo was trying to sync up with Suga-san. He, uh, he managed to hit a spike, but it was a little out."

"A little."

"Just a bit."

"It's kind of impressive. I mean, I knew you guys—or I guess everyone else, you being a libero and all—hit hard, but Hinata's got an arm on him to concuss me like that."

The car slows to a stop as Noya laughs. He seems to be making an effort to be quieter than normal—you appreciate the thought. "Right? Poor Yachi-san's gonna be shaking like a leaf while you're out, though."

"I'm counting on Shimizu-senpai to keep her from getting her head taken off," you reply with a solemn nod, moving to get out of the car.

Noya stops you with a firm hand. "Wait here. I got you."

"I can walk, you know—"

"If the way you got out of the hospital was any sign, not well," he says. He zips out of the car, circles around so fast that anyone else probably would have tripped. You sigh, smiling, as he opens your door for you. "C'mon, let me help you."

"Fine, fine. You're ridiculous, you know that?"

Still, you let him guide you inside, an arm supporting you at the waist. You won't lie—you are really dizzy still. He brings you into the living room, taking slow, careful steps as you pass the kitchen by. Someone's inside, cooking something, based on the sizzle from within, but Noya takes you right on past to sit across from his mom, who's still pretty staunchly silent as she watches this take place.

Out of the context of the butcher shop, she makes you deeply nervous, itching for her approval.

You blurt the first thing that comes to mind.

"I really like your shop. It's always very clean."

She cracks a smile. "Thank you, [surname]-chan. I'm glad to know that one of my regulars thinks highly of the shop."

"And the prices are really good. And you're always really nice, but it doesn't feel forced. I'm sorry that sometimes I buy too much and the meat goes bad. I always feel really guilty when that happens, like I'm insulting the animal it came from and the person I bought it from, not to mention—"

She stifles a laugh. "Honey, it's okay. I'm sorry if I'm making you nervous. To be honest, I've been thinking about your situation since I got the call yesterday, and I'm still not sure what the right thing to do is."

The words your situation send your heart straight into the deepest pits of your stomach. "Oh."

Noya's sat firmly beside you, a small comfort as your anxiety begins to spike. His mom locks eyes with him, jerking her chin toward the kitchen. "Yuu, honey, go help Mei in the kitchen."

"But, Okaa-san—"

"Go help Mei," she repeats.

You have half a mind to run out after him, half a mind to grab his sleeve and beg, Noya-senpai, don't leave me alone with her!, but you know it wouldn't do a thing. Instead, you stare at your lap, willing your bottom lip not to quiver.

"Yuu told me a little bit about your situation," she goes on to say.

That fucking phrase again.

"He didn't tell me much, and he's made clear that you don't want anyone to worry about you, or any sort of special treatment, but I want to make clear: I'm not here to upend your life or force anything on you, but you're safe here. Will you tell me what's going on at home?"

You bite your lip to remind yourself not to cry out the gate. "I'd rather not."

"That's okay. I understand that I'm more or less a stranger to you. I don't need details from you, or a life story. But—look at me—"

You look up at her, teary-eyed.

"—I need to know that if, when you're recovered enough to be left alone, I let you go home, you're going to be safe."

"O-of course!" you say, too quickly even though you're not lying. "I'm going—I'm going to be safe. Even if Otoo-san wanted to—to hurt me, he's never home to do it."

"Do you have everything you need?"

"Yes. He—he gave me a debit card to use and there's always money in the account. I mean, it hasn't declined or anything so far. And I know how to cook and grocery shop. And now that I'm managing for the volleyball club, I've gotten really good at meal prepping. Oh—can I go home sometime tonight or tomorrow? I have curry that I should freeze."

She looks at you with sad eyes. "I can't let you go by yourself, but I can come with you, or you can go with Yuu tonight. Since you'll be staying here for a few nights, we can take the chance to pick up some necessities for you, too."

"Okay. Thank you."

"We'll go after dinner."

"Okay."

"And, listen, [surname]-chan. You are always welcome here, okay? Even if it's perfectly safe at your house, even if you just want to come and play with the cat, you're welcome here."

"Okay."

She watches you another moment. When she leaves the room, she ruffles your hair.

It takes you approximately three seconds after that to break.

You've never been so glad to see Noya. He practically runs to your side once he's released, immediately pulling you into a warm hug. You cry into his shoulder, wind your arms around him.

"Sorry. I tried to slip back out here just in case, but Mei literally held me back. She scruffed me like a cat when I tried to leave the kitchen. You would've laughed."

You let out a wet laugh. "Wish I saw it."

"I really am sorry. I know she can be intense, but I swear it's just because she cares."

"She wasn't—she wasn't intense or anything," you admit. "Just—you've got a good mom. She really is cool."

"She is! She's great. What did she do?"

You bury your face in his shoulder in the hopes that it'll muffle your voice a bit. "Just—just motherly stuff, I guess. Asked if I'm safe. If I've got everything I need."

"You are safe at home, right?"

"Yes! I dunno why everyone thinks that—that—"

He strokes your hair as you sniffle, gives you the moment to collect yourself.

"I'm safe," you finish lamely. "I am. I don't like it when people care about me. I dunno what to do with that."

"You're gonna have to get used to that one, unfortunately. The team's worried about you, too, you know? They wouldn't start practice until I gave them the full report."

"Oh great, worry. That's even worse than caring."

"If it bothers you, you're just gonna have to work really hard at resting and accepting the help you're being given so you can get better quicker."

"Okay." You sniffle. "I'll do that."

He holds you closer, holds you until you've calmed down. Stays by your side until dinner's ready, until you're ready to face his family.

Mei is weird compared to everyone else at the table. The whole family has showed for this dinner you've intruded on—Satsuki smiles at you when she gets home, whispers an apology when her shouted I'm home! makes you wince. Another sister—the stalker sister, Kaede, if you remember correctly—emerges from a room deeper in the house when called, paint smudged on her cheeks and hands somehow perfectly immaculate. She's lower-key than Satsuki or Noya is, but when you're all sat around the table, she launches right into some debate with Satsuki that their grandfather immediately joins in on, lively and at a lowered volume out of respect for you.

You eat in silence. You'd like to pretend that you're paying attention to whatever heated debate is going on, but it's a little hard to follow past the dull throbbing in your skull. You think maybe the crying made your headache worse.

While the others get lost in some lively conversation or another—Noya going quiet occasionally to check in with you—the sister third just sits there, like you, except you have the excuse of being an active concussion case to justify your silence. She watches you with a nervous look in her eye that doesn't seem to fade whenever you glance back at her.

You can't remember which sister Noya said gets the anxiety attacks—if he said it—but you'd be willing to bet it was Mei.

The one Soba saved.

She won't stop staring at you. On a better day, you might have more tact, but, well, the concussion, so the next time you catch her eye, you stare right back. "Why are you staring at me?"

She jolts, shoulders collapsing in on her. "Sorry. I just… you're Yuu's friend?"

"Uh, yeah." That should be obvious, but you should also be nicer.

"I'm not really, uh, I'm not great at talking to people. But he was saying we'd probably get along, and I was trying to figure out why, but you don't really talk much, so it's hard to get a read on you? But I'm not really great with strangers or anything, and… I mean… d-do you like volleyball? You're a manager in Yuu's club, right?"

A nod. "Yeah. I'm finally kind of at the point where I understand what's going on, and it's fun to watch, but I can't say I'm really good at managing or anything."

"What?" Noya interrupts. "No, you're amazing. What are you talking about?"

You raise an eyebrow. "How have you completely missed the part where I am the single least useful manager? Shimizu-senpai's amazing, Yachi-san's doing all these cool, professional-looking posters and stuff, and I show up. Which I now do not even do, on account of getting hit in the head by a stray ball like it's my first time in the gym."

"I don't wanna hear it from the only reason I passed my final exams."

"Excuse me? I didn't take the exams for you. You did that—and all the studying—yourself. So did Tanaka-senpai, before you bring him up."

"And Shouyo and Kageyama?"

"They took their own exams, too. All of you guys passed because you put in the work."

"You made like, a hundred practice exams. You sent them home after they got their grades back with detailed study schedules. Weren't you, like, adjusting their practice exams to focus on testing the things they got wrong the previous day or something, too?"

"That's nothing. That's literally just like, stuff they probably could have done online if they'd thought about it."

"But they didn't. You did. You don't get to put Yachi-san up on a pedestal just to say you're doing nothing when you factually are—"

You bat at his shoulder playfully. "I literally have a concussion, you're not allowed to argue with me until I'm better."

"Fine, I'll restart this argument the second you're back at school, then," he teases.

You hate him. (You don't.)

You return your attention to Mei. "Sorry, someone likes to fight me."

"When have I ever—"

You reach out blindly, covering his mouth with your hand and smiling at Mei. "But yeah, I don't dislike volleyball, for sure. It's good to get out of the house, and all that. What about you? What do you do?"

Her face brightens a little. "Oh, I'm actually in university! I'm taking a course to become a librarian. It's probably not all that interesting, though, so…"

You lean forward a little, smile encouragingly. When you release Noya's mouth, he has the good sense not to continue the argument. "No, tell me about it. That sounds really cool!"

Bingo. She relaxes into the conversation, starts telling you all about the stuff she's learning, how much more librarians do beyond putting books on the shelf and scanning your library cards. She has a lot to say on the subject, and you don't really follow a lot of it, but you nod encouragingly and try your best. It's not even anything complicated, she's just a little hard to understand through the pounding in your head and the fatigue settling firmly over your body.

When dinner's over, your attempts to help clean are met with no less than six stern looks. You reach for your phone thoughtlessly, which only makes your head pound harder within seconds of checking your notifications.

Right. No screens.

Fine then. You wander into the living room, where Soba greets you with a soft mrrp?.

"Hi, baby," you coo, coming to sit nearby. She's picky about when she likes to be pet, so you don't reach for her, no matter how much you want to. Instead, you sit back and watch her, pushing a cat toy her way as a peace offering. Her eyes lock on, pupils widening as she focuses on the toy.

You have her attention.

By the time Noya finds you, both you and Soba are thoroughly engrossed in her quest to fucking murder this cat toy, and you've only got one new scratch to show for it. For a moment, you can almost ignore the pounding in your head, but then you hear a dish clatter in the kitchen and for just a moment you swear to god it's a gunshot that's perfectly hit you in the forehead.

He crouches beside you, gently takes the toy to distract Soba. "Kaa-san says you wanted to run back by your place to grab some stuff and freeze your curry."

"Y-yeah," you grit out with a nod.

"I was gonna ask if you wanted to go now, but, well…" He nods to you. "You kinda look like your head's about to split open."

"'M fine," you grumble. "Let's go."

"You are actively tearing up."

"What? No I'm not—" Your hand flies to your cheek, and dammit, he's right. "…fine."

"It's okay. Kaa-san's gonna be home with you tomorrow while I'm at school, and she can take you then."

Your lip juts into a pout. "I haven't even done anything today."

"I know, I know. You got Mei to like you, though. That's something!"

"Didn't feel like I was doin' anything."

"C'mon. You can take my room, and I can get you some pajamas from Satsuki or Mei, or you can just borrow some of my clothes. But you should get some rest."

You groan as he helps you to your feet. "Please don't make me make any decisions right now."

"My clothes it is, then. Great! I was hoping you'd say that!"

He guides you down the hall and up the stairs to his bedroom.

"Where're you gonna sleep if I'm stealin' your bedroom?" you mumble.

"We already moved my futon out. This way, you're in the quietest part of the house."

"Really. Your bedroom is the quietest part of the house?" Somehow, you don't believe that for a second.

"Well, when I'm not in it, it is," he grins.

"And you completely dodged the question."

"Well, they've decided that in order to take you in until you're better, someone had to go, so… I'm so sorry, [name]-san. Remember me fondly."

You snort. "They are not kicking you out."

"They're not. My futon's getting laid out near the door so if you need something you can yell."

"Please at least sleep on the couch downstairs or something."

"Absolutely not. When I hit a thousand, I want to already be a man worth marrying you! That means being there when you're hurt!"

You huff. You don't have the energy to fight it, at any rate. "Sure, sure. You know you don't have to do much to be worth me?"

"I'm going to choose to believe you mean that you already think I'm amazing and cool and not that you're trying to put yourself down."

"Believe what you want," you sigh.

Inside his bedroom is surprisingly clean. The Nishinoya family seems to have done plenty of planning for this, so you'd be surprised if there hadn't been a crazed cleanup session to deep-clean his bedroom once they decided that was where you'd be sleeping. Some posters on the wall, one spot where a poster conspicuously used to be, based on the tack still marking the corners of a perfect rectangle in between two others. It's basically exactly what you'd expect if you deep-cleaned a teenage boy's bedroom. Noya leaves your side to rummage his drawers, returning a moment later with clothes for you.

"You're good to get changed by yourself, right? Not too dizzy or anything? I can grab Satsuki—no, bad idea—I can grab Mei if you need some help."

You shake your head. "I'll be okay. The dizzy's way better than it was this morning, 'sjust painful."

"I'll wait outside, then."

You wait for him to close the door behind him before you get changed, stumble a little in the process because you were totally downplaying how dizzy you were, but eventually get yourself into the provided t-shirt and basketball shorts. When Noya returns, he stops short in the doorway, staring at you rather openly as you tug a bit at the shirt.

You raise an eyebrow at him. His cheeks are scarlet as he stares you down.

"Are you sure I'm the one with the concussion?" you ask when you're fed up with the quiet. "You seem to be rebooting."

"Marry me," he blurts again. "I mean—sorry, bad timing probably, but—nevermind—"

"Nine hundred and—huh." You bite your lip thoughtfully, racking your brain, but the focus only makes your head pound worse. "Did you propose at all yesterday? I can't really remember."

"Oh, yeah, nine hundred and twenty times or so. I've just got twenty more to go!"

"Uh-huh. What's the actual count?"

"…nine hundred and forty to go," he admits. "Once with the morning greeting, and I got a couple out when you agreed to help me with the jump set."

"Nine thirty-nine, then," you say as he moves to lay out the futon. As he does, you watch his arms flex appreciatively. Maybe it's the concussion, but you can't quite seem to pull your eyes away. "You know. As thanks for helping me out with everything, and all that."

"Not just because I'm nice to look at?" he pouts.

"Keep dreaming, Casanova."

You allow yourself one last impulse for the night, stopping him on the way out the door. "Hey, Senpai?"

He turns just in time for you to crash into him in a hug. "Wh—"

"Thank you. Seriously. For… for not letting stuff get out with the guys. And taking care of me. And… and everything."

Noya huffs softly, arms wrapping around you in turn. "I got you. You just rest."

You don't need him to tell you twice.

Footnotes

27. Fun fact: I wrote this section by texting myself on discord each of the Reader's individual replies with my glasses off. If a particular exchange seemed too clean, I added one or two to balance it out, keeping in mind this girl is typing with the kind of headache that demands answers from the gods themselves. I like to think I did a decent job of it.

Tags: @deeplightgarden @idonthaveanameideayet @dusstory @kazunish

#my fics #nishinoya yuu/reader #nishinoya yuu x reader #yuu nishinoya x reader #yuu nishinoya/reader #noya/reader #noya x reader #haikyuu x reader #haikyuu reader insert

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chiconisroc · 1 year ago

Note

Have you seen this review of your fic? (Sending in another ask cause I don't want people to think I'm trying to stir up trouble)

I appreciate that everyone has their own unique perspective. It's interesting to see my fanfiction being rated, as fanart doesn't typically receive ratings, which seems a bit unusual to me. Personally, I find it difficult to imagine giving an artist a rating for their artwork. I can’t even do so on a fanfiction either. Usually, I don’t care for a story, or I just love it, hahaha, but I never proceed with giving them a number. I'm not sure if fanart is typically rated by others; perhaps I'm out of the loop with such things?

Since the story hasn't reached its halfway point yet, there are many aspects that haven't been explored or will be addressed later. For instance, the puzzle… hehehe. The review was made before they read past chapter 20, so they didn’t get to see how Camila reached for the puzzle that was stored under her bed to bring along with them, so I didn’t forget about it ;3. So, it's intriguing to have a rating based on what has been presented thus far.

I would also like to emphasize the physical and mental challenges that Philip is going through in the story, from the beginning until now. He has faced near-death experiences with the Collector and has had Gus unearth memories that he had locked away for centuries. As a result, he hasn't had much time to gather himself and is struggling with his emotions/traumas that he shoves to the side a lot.

In my writing, I strive to create characters that feel realistic rather than conforming to the resilience typically seen in cartoons. Philip, being a 400-year-old man, carries a lot of baggage that is finally catching up to him mentally.

It's worth mentioning as a reminder that this is a fanfiction and not a fully edited and polished novel. Expecting perfection and have everything answered right away would be unrealistic, especially since I am constantly updating with new chapters more frequently than others :o. So, if there are some flaws in my story, which most likely there are, well, it is to be expected since I’m not an actual published author, and thus I’m practicing and learning to get better at writing so one day I can become an actual author one day : ). **This reminds me of the more recent question that if I were ever to rewrite the story. If i were to rewrite it, then yeah, for sure peeps would have a more published work which would be way better than it is right now, hahaha

That being said, I do appreciate the positive aspects the reviewer pointed out, which I find encouraging. To the person who wrote the review, if you would like, I can provide further explanation and defend the decisions made for the story through direct messaging. Rest assured, everything I write has a purpose behind it : ). And if you are enjoying the story now, then great! It's nice to have you along the ride with us : ). It's just always fun enjoying things together, hahaha

I won’t say more about the reviewer’s opinion since I’m currently working on the next chapter for the other story x.x, so… I got to write and write : ), hahaha

#philip wittebane #the owl house #emperor belos #was not the hero #belos #owl house fandom #owl house fanfiction

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regulatedchaos · 1 year ago

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Keep trying, self.

pama has access to this, blog. Well, the only person who has access to this and pretty much my entire life since hs. Grateful for Pama. Always trying to look after me kahit magkalayo kami and for some reason we feel each others sadness without checking in.

So every now and then she reads it and sends me a message sa FB Sabi nya I need rest daw. Like let go and let God. I told her na I never knew what rest meant since I took responsibility of a lot of things since I started working and nung sinabi nya na mag rest ako. I didn't know how. She's been a great reminder of the things that I have to do for myself cos I tend to forget. Grateful for her, I miss her 😭 I love her forever🥹

Her recommendation(rest) has left me questioning when was the last time I did rest and how did I do it? I can't remember if I ever did or I knew how. And then I remember how at peace I am whenever I'm with Cassie and I just realized that sya yung pahinga ko. He is my home and I haven't been able to rest but I try to rest padin as much as I can. It's different lang cos it's not with him. Idk if it's my hormones but I've never been this attached to anyone in my life and I don't know this feeling of longing and yearning for him na I've never felt before.

I give up easily. I barely try being with people I'm easily disappointed and I bail out at the slightest inconvenience. But with Cassie, I kept holding on.

I have felt different kinds of love before, selfish, selfless. One way, some were low-key manipulating, convenient-kind-of-love, even toxic ones. Different people good and bad ones, but I am the always one to give up on them.

If I were to describe our love (Cassie's and I) the first thing that I could think of is "nurturing". I can't tell if he feels the same way. I don't wanna assume lol but.. He just loves me even if he's seen the bad side of me I think I have a worse and worst side not sure if I've let it out but. The love that I felt from him lets me grow, it's a learning and loving experience at the same time he tolerates me and corrects me din. And Ive felt like I have become a better person because of him and I don't think he's even aware of that.

I can't even begin to think to be with someone else. I tried cos he gave me the idea na baka maghanap ako ng iba, but wala eh di ko din alam. I've never felt like this before. It's a roller coaster ride. I don't think I've ever loved and cared for someone like this, too. It's definitely new to me and tbh I didn't know that I had it in me, to love and accept someone like this. I have quite low tolerance with people in general. I guess he is "my greatest love" idk what you call it I'm not really good with describing what I feel

I can't wait to be back in his arms and rest. And be at peace cos I know that when I'm with him everything is gonna be okay, like my mind and my heart can automatically pause which is unusual cos it runs 24/7 and I'm never not overthinking. Sabi ko nga sa kanya nagayuma ata ako ewan. Everything is just better with him like he doesn't need to give me anything material for me to feel loved. Siguro din kasi sA kanya ko n aexercise yung other love languanges receiving and giving. I learned to much when I tried to give him his receiving LL.

Fucking hormones I'm such a softie, is this my hormones lang or inlove and sobrang yearning lang ako Kay Cassie??? this message is so clingy. I kinda hate that I feel so needy. I can't wait for another call from him tomorrow. He won't be able to call me everyday until next month which is the right timing I think cos I'll prolly have given birth to Papicito by then.

25Nov23

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futurebird · 1 year ago

Text

A cautious "thumbs up" for Ozempic/Wegovy for weight loss.

There is a lot of nonsense about Ozempic/Wegovy (semaglutide) for managing hunger and loosing weight. If you have heard anything about it, it's probably that celebrities are taking it, that it works fast, that is might make your face look gaunt, old and that it is the "latest fad diet" this is pretty annoying since I don't think much of this is accurate.

My Story

I was not in the market for any kind of weight loss assistance until I shattered my leg two years ago. I was perfectly happy being fairly active, fat, and not stressed about diet or body image. But, breaking my leg changed my perspective: doing PR with so much weight was much harder than I anticipated, so hard that there was a good chance I might not really walk again. So, I started looking into diets and drugs to see if anything had improved since I'd last cared about such things.

Before semaglutide, the only effective drugs for weight loss were things like phentermine. Phentermine is ... well, it's pretty much meth. You can take it for three months and not be hungry and lose some weight, but then it stops working (unless you take more, but too much will give you a heart attack.) So meth-like drugs aren't a great solution. Nearly any other drug or over the counter "weight loss" pill is probably a scam.

Semaglutide is different. It works by reducing the rate that your stomach empties after you eat. So you stay full longer. This can also lead to nausea and strange tasting burps if your dose is too, high, which mine was initially. Semaglutide has been used for years to treat diabetes. Prescribing it for weight loss is new.

I told my doctor about my concerns about not making enough progress in physical therapy if I didn't reduce my weight. I told her about the diet journal I kept, and how I was worried that if I focused on food all the time my ED would come back. She got me signed up for the drug which is injectable. You take it once a week.

I tried my first dose and within hours I was not hungry at all. It was a little scary at first. I would forget to eat. That's not something I've ever done in my life. The stress of thinking about food was gone. And though I did feel a little nauseous for the first few days, soon I was loosing weight as a decent pace, without feeling obsessed with weighing myself and counting calories, without feeling wired on meth. I'm really happy with my progress.

My PR sessions started going much better after I was down 15 pounds, now that I'm down 40 pounds I'm taking up jogging again. I think I can find a new balence. I'm ambivalent about loosing weight. I'm over the moon about walking and having better mobility!

I don't feel like I look that different, which is a relief. I feel better and that's what matters.

This drug is currently kind of annoying to get since its in high demand. That shouldn't last forever. It probably isn't right for everyone. Read the message boards experiences vary. Mine has been particularly good.

Before going on a diet or using any diet aid think about what you are trying to get out of it. Your weight doesn't define who you are but for me it was getting in my way.

I'm not a totally new and different person, but I feel healthier and I can do more of the things that I want, and to me that makes it a good choice.

#diets #weight #ozempic for weight loss #ozempic #Ozempic #Wegovy #cw diets #weight loss diet

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1d1195 · 8 months ago

Note

I’m glad I was able to help in any way. 💖 I’m pretty sure I’ve mentioned you to my fiancé before. lol I was like deep in my phone and he teased me about reading Harry Styles fan fiction and I rolled my eyes at his stupid joke. But then I just went on and was like, “Honestly I’m not sure if I’m still into Harry Styles or how Sam writes him. I’m in it for the stories. I forget it’s about him until I see his last name. She’s so great. We’re so alike. I hope she writes an actual novel.”

Yeah it seems that everyone else is sad about my dad except for me. You know like I’m gonna be 30 in two years and I just can’t bring the same garbage from my teens and 20s into a new decade. I kept thinking about his speech that he’d give and how whatever he would say would be bs because we don’t have a relationship. He doesn’t know me at all. Or my fiancé. He’d already started flaunting my upcoming nuptials like a show pony. I just want to be able to look back on my wedding pictures and know I was truly happy that day and I wasn’t faking it.

Im not sure where it came from but I’m really not afraid to disappoint people anymore. Especially when it’s just me not doing they want me to do. Ya know?

as for my wedding. It’s looking like a small backyard wedding at my in-laws. I’m very blessed to have a close relationship with my fiancé’s parents. But I think we might elope and do a proper wedding in a few years. Right now I just can’t justify the cost cuz there’s so many other places I’d like to put money in before a wedding. And neither one of us have that fire to plan one. I see these brides who just are so go go go about it and I feel weird that I don’t have that. (You can imagine my surprise while reading this latest Zipper extra and how their nuptials have turned out. I cackled.) Thank goodness my fiancé feels the same. So hopefully we make a decision soon.

I had missed writing so much but it’s nice to have some creativity back in my life. I got inspired by reading your stuff so much.

I adore you, too 💖! -🐱

YOU TOLD YOUR FIANCÉ ABOUT ME 😭😭😭

I’ve ALWAYS wanted to write a novel. Since I’ve been writing on here, I would REALLY like to turn Traditional into a book hehehe I would obvs change names and background info and then probs add additional descriptions and whatnot but that would be my ideal world lol

I’m so happy for you! That’s extremely exciting you feel that way, and i don’t want to put words in your mouth but i remember you telling me you worried about bothering me by messaging multiple times in one day and i know it’s not the same as feeling disappointed but im SO glad you don’t think about what other people think of you. It’s very freeing! (Hopefully I’ll get better about it myself) but I’m so happy for you 💕💕

A backyard wedding is my IDEAL wedding. Our families just know too many people and we don’t have big backyards in our families hehehe that sounds amazing! Totally get the $$$$ vibe. Just watched my sister drop $30k+ on her wedding. Insane stuff. I’m glad you have a good relationship with your fiancé’s family. That’s so so sweet!

I INSPIRED YOU IM SOBBING 😭😭😭😭😭

Thank you so much for sharing all this with me, it makes me so happy and I’m SO glad you’re part of my life! 💕

Xoxo

#🐱

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floralseokjin · 3 years ago

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⤑ 9 months to fall in love 3.

It seems like everyone around you is either already in love, or in the process of falling, and while normally you couldn’t give a damn, finding out the co-worker you’ve had a teensy crush on is dating someone else at the office seems to sucker punch you right in the gut. It’s stupid, and you’re irritated at yourself, but you can’t seem to shake out of the funk you’ve fallen face first in.

Feeling lonely and heartsore, and mad for no reason, during drinks with your best friend you spot a man at the bar. Tequila confident, you make your way over to the stranger, and successfully one thing leads to another. The next morning you leave before he’s woken up, feeling satisfied in one way, but still as discontented as ever. Telling yourself it was an inebriated mistake, you quickly try to forget about it.

Only, three weeks later that night comes back to haunt you – in a very unescapable way…

pairing; kim seokjin x f reader au/genre; unplanned pregnancy, strangers to lovers, slow burn, romance (dare I say romcom in places), smut, angst, (melo)drama, dual pov words; 8,068

warnings/includes (!) tiniest mention of abortion, mentions of unprotected sex

⟶ ao3 link

*inspired by the manhwa ��Positively Yours.’

↪︎ series index

SEASON ONE ⇤ previous | next ⇥

When Yuna heard what had happened she was ready to storm the AGS building.

After Jin walked out, you had no other option but to call her and ask if she could come get you. She was beside herself by the time she arrived at the hospital, demanding to know what happened. You barely managed to explain the night’s events, but it didn’t matter, because as soon as she learned what Jin had done, you couldn’t get a word in edgeways. She was absolutely livid, pacing the room as she ranted. Exhausted, you didn’t want to cause a fuss. You felt bad enough as it was calling her so late on a weeknight, and you didn’t want her losing sleep over your problems.

Strangely enough, now that the shock of Jin’s disappearance had worn off, you felt almost calm. The furious ball of anxiety inside your chest had diminished, and now all you wanted was to go home and climb into bed.

The doctor gave you a quick once over before you left and informed you to take one iron supplement each morning for the next two months. After that, you’d be due a check-up. Thanking her, you left with Yuna. Despite her insistence on spending the night, you told her to go home to Jimin, who was probably waiting up for her. Reluctantly, she listened, making you promise her you’d call in sick tomorrow. You hated having sick days, but this time it couldn’t be helped. You needed to rest and recuperate your body. You needed to be healthy for your baby.

You texted Namjoon before having a quick shower – wanting to clean the hospital smell off you immediately – and he responded straight away, despite it nearing one in the morning. You wondered if he had only just gotten back from drinks with Yoongi and Sera. The thought made you sad for a moment, imagining everyone else having a good time while you were…not. Still, Namjoon’s well wishes were nice to read.

Rest up, hope you feel better soon. Don’t worry about missing work 😳

(Although, you were positive he’d hit the wrong emoji.)

But his next message irritated you for some reason.

Yoongi did say he was worried you looked a little sick today.

You were either annoyed by people (read: Yoongi) talking about you behind your back, or annoyed at yourself for your heart doing a little flutter because of his concern. The fact of the matter was you had looked like shit at work today, and Yoongi – and probably everyone else – had noticed.

You headed to bed.

To your surprise, as soon as your head hit the pillow you knocked out and didn’t wake up until 11am. You were famished too, raiding your refrigerator and cupboards for something – anything – to eat. For the first time in nearly a week, you’d had a good night’s sleep and had felt hungry. It was great news, but also surprising. After everything that had happened last night, you thought you’d feel worse in the morning, but instead you felt lighter. All your stress had been down to one thing – one person – and now you knew where you stood with him, which was what you’d wanted all along.

You didn’t know Jin, never had, so technically speaking, nothing would be missing from your life. Granted, your baby wouldn’t know their father, but it didn’t matter. Not in this day and age. It wasn’t your fault. You had done the right thing and told him. Any guilt he might feel in the future would be down to him and him alone. You were guilt free. You kept telling yourself that.

You spent the rest of the day making sure to drink lots of water, resting up on the couch. Your first instinct had been to work on some designs, but you stopped yourself. You weren’t at work today, work didn’t exist. So instead, you browsed Netflix and decided to watch a show you’d been meaning to check out for the longest time. It felt nice to not do anything for once, and you tried not to think too hard, not wanting to ruin your relaxation time. However, soon enough, your mind wondered back to Jin, unable to stop yourself.

You might have been guilt free, but obviously you weren’t thought free…

You replayed what happened the night before. He had obviously been eager to see you again, impulsively inviting you out for dinner. Yuna was the one who had planted the initial seed: maybe he wanted a repeat of That Night, and while, yes, he had been rather forward – flirty, even – he hadn’t seemed pushy. He’d admitted he was nervous. Nervous? Around you? Although… your attitude had been a little off, so no wonder you’d put him on edge. You were nothing like how you’d acted That Night.

But, regardless of his intentions, sex or not, he had looked after you when you’d fainted, he’d driven you to the hospital, and then waited hours for you to wake up. He seemed like a good guy, so knowing he’d run off after hearing the news left you feeling a little… disappointed. One of the two things you hadn’t wanted to feel – and the second one wasn’t too far behind.

Yes, your anxiety had eased, but as the day wore on, and the more you thought, in its place grew another feeling, hurt.

But could you really blame him? You’d taken him by surprise. To want to disappear wasn’t an unthinkable reaction. You too, had wanted to run as far as your legs could carry you when you found out about your pregnancy – but obviously, you couldn’t. There was no escaping it. The baby was growing inside of you.

At the end of the day, you were the one who was left to deal with everything. He could go on with his life unaffected. The thought made you slightly bitter. You had come to terms with your pregnancy, however still nervous and scared, and now you were protective of your unborn child. Just imagining Jin getting on with his life as though nothing had happened was a stab to the gut. You wondered what he was doing right now? Maybe drafting some type of damage control plan afraid you were going to try and fleece him for all his money… You shook your head and told yourself not to be so dramatic. 1. He had no clue you knew he was a CEO, and 2. He wasn’t like that.

But then, how could you be certain? You didn’t know him at all.

Confused, and feeling strangely rejected, you secretly hoped he’d come around. If he needed time, you could give him that. Although, a heads up would have been nice. It was cruel to leave you in limbo like this. But how would he even contact you if he decided he wanted to talk? He knew less about you than you had him. In fact, the only key piece of information he knew was your first name, and that alone wasn’t very key. Well, he did know that you were a graphic designer and you worked nearby his building. Would that be enough to find you?

You knew one thing for sure, you weren’t going to go to him.

It was down to him now. It was his call.

Yuna insisted on spending the weekend with you, which you were actually thankful for. The distraction was nice – not to mention the company. Yuna and Jimin had become some sort of package deal since they’d met and gotten together, and while you’d long gotten used to it, and classed Jimin as a close friend now, it was nice to have your best friend all to yourself. It reminded you of university again – hanging out together, making food together, gossiping together… Although, the gossiping was more so ranting this weekend, the person in question obvious.

You understood why she was angry, but you didn’t want to think of Jin all weekend. For now, you’d just assume you were going it alone. It was easier than tormenting yourself with what if scenarios. What would be would be. Maybe you were destined to be a part of the co-parenting triad Yuna still liked to bring up.

After her fifth warning, Yuna finally shut up about ‘He Who Must Not Be Named This Weekend,’ and moved on to another topic: the baby.

Unbeknownst to Jimin, the wedding was being postponed so their little niece/nephew/glob could be included in the celebrations. The thought made you nervous. In just under nine months, you would be holding a baby in your arms, and you’d be an actual mother. A year after that, they’d be walking and starting to talk. Your life would be unimaginably different. The more you thought about it, the more you realised how unprepared you were. Yuna reassured you it was okay. These kinds of things weren’t instantaneous. Being a mother was a learning process – even after the baby was born, and for a long time after that, too. It had only been a week since you’d found out. No one was expecting you to be an expert straight away.

She had a point. But then again, she wasn’t the one facing impending motherhood right now.

It was part of your personality to want to be the best at something immediately, but motherhood would be different. The thought was unnerving, but you had to accept it. Glob was counting on you – and possibly only you if Jin never showed his face again.

When you woke up for work on Monday morning you felt a lot fresher than the week previous. The doctor had said the iron supplements would take at least a week to kick in, but the sleep you’d gotten had obviously righted your exhaustion, and you were no longer dehydrated. You felt a little awkward stepping inside the office, but no one really paid you much attention other than good morning greetings.

You had to keep remembering that you were the only one who knew you were pregnant. To others, you’d just been off work because you’d felt unwell, which was normal. Even for you, who rarely missed a day of work. Namjoon came by to tell you he was glad you were feeling better, and then soon after Yoongi mentioned how great it was to see your complexion back to normal. You tried to ignore how such a small comment made you feel, but it was nice that he’d noticed.

Work went by fairly slowly that day, but maybe it was because all you could think about was food. Mainly, a big, juicy cheeseburger – no, make that a double cheeseburger. Your appetite had come back with a vengeance. Just last night you had searched the overall symptoms of a person who was 5-6 weeks pregnant. Glob was now probably the size of a pea. Fatigue and anxiety aside, thankfully you hadn’t experienced any morning sickness yet. Maybe you’d be one of the lucky ones that didn’t suffer with it. That would be great, although it was still early days.

Instead, it seemed, you had turned ravenous.

By the time half 5 came around, you’d decided you were going to the nearest fast-food restaurant and taking your order home via taxi. The subway would only slow down your journey, and you were eager to eat as soon as possible. You were nearly through the office door when you heard your name being called. You turned to see Yoongi.

“Wait up, we’ll walk down together.”

You smiled, coming to halt, but then you caught sight of Sera beside him. Of course. They walked out together every day because Yoongi drove her to and from work. That’s how their romance had ‘bloomed’ – you’d heard the story countless times because Sera loved telling it.

“Doing anything interesting tonight?” Yoongi asked as they caught up to you. Sera linked her arm through his and smiled at you. It wasn’t the most believable of actions.

Ignoring her, you hit the button for the elevator. “I’ve been craving a greasy burger all day, so I’m on my way to get that and then do nothing all night.” Hearing yourself, you felt a little self-conscious. “Very boring, I know.”

“Not at all,” Yoongi was quick to dispute. “Sounds like my type of night.”

You grinned, unable to help it, and for a moment your eyes met, his gaze softening. There was always something so calming about his gaze. Supportive, encouraging… You could go on, but it would just be embarrassing. All three of you stepped inside the elevator, and Yoongi pressed the button for the ground floor.

“We’re having a quiet night in, aren’t we, Yoongi?” Sera’s voice morphed into that cutesy tone she often used when talking to him. You couldn’t tell if it was for his benefit or something else entirely. Did she think she was making you jealous?

Yoongi nodded and chuckled, glancing down at her, but she was looking at you, directing her next sentence your way.

“I love staying over his place. It’s so cosy, and his bed is like the biggest bed I’ve ever slept in.”

“Oh yeah?” you humoured her, stepping out first when the doors opened.

“It’s not that big, babe. You’re just small,” you heard Yoongi tell her fondly from behind you, and for some reason, that hurt a lot more than Sera’s poor attempt at provoking you.

You reached the main door to the building Artkive was located in and lifted your hand up to say goodbye. You went one way, while those two always went the other.

“See you tomorrow,” Yoongi said cheerfully, Sera giggling by his side as she cuddled up to him.

Sometimes you wondered what that felt like. Such a simple act of affection. It had been a long time since you’d experienced something like that, so long in fact, it was difficult to remember. Not that you wanted to remember the man who had been able to induce such a reaction from you. He had broken your heart after all.

Lost in thought, you almost didn’t recognise the person leaning against the wall of the adjacent building. You came to a sudden halt when you did, frozen with disbelief.

“____,” Jin said softly, standing straight. His expression was downcast and he looked visibly exhausted, but instead of feeling sorry for him, anger gathered in your chest.

After all the conflicting emotions you’d battled with on the weekend, it seemed fury had won.

“What do you want?” you bit, beginning to stomp off now that the shock had worn away.

“Can we please just talk for a moment?” He rushed after you, his voice low as you passed by throngs of people on their way home from work too. He obviously didn’t want to create a scene. You didn’t either come to think of it, glancing around in hopes that none of your co-workers were nearby.

“Ten minutes of your time,” he urged, managing to get in front of you. “Five minutes, even.”

You crossed your arms, aware you were in people’s way. Stepping to the side, just under the canopy of a patisserie, you stared at Jin with a clenched jaw. “Why should I?”

Inside, you told yourself not to be so stubborn. Hadn’t you agreed with yourself to give him time? To give him a chance? But seeing him now, stood in front of you with that stupid remorseful look on your face, you felt furious at him. How had he even found you?!

“Please, ____,” he pleaded. “I know I don’t deserve it, but I just want to explain.”

You didn’t reply, unsure what you wanted to say to be honest, but Jin took it as rejection.

“Please. Then you’re free to make whatever decision you want. I’ll respect it—” Stopping abruptly, his voice broke with emotion. “Of course I will.”

You wavered, noticing his eyes shiny with tears. Feeling awkward, you grabbed the shoulder strap of your purse. “Fine.”

Jin’s face lit up somewhat, hopeful, yet still hesitant.

“I’m grabbing a burger. Want one?”

You had to admit the image of Jin eating a messy burger dressed in a buttoned-up cardigan was pretty humorous. Even if you were mad at him. And even more so after he’d tried to pay for your food.

You hadn’t wanted to sit inside the noisy restaurant, but you didn’t have much of an option now. At least you got to eat sooner, though… You were so hungry, having craved this all day, you didn’t even care how you looked while you urgently tucked in. It was the complete opposite of how you ate your food Thursday night, but if Jin noticed he said nothing. Instead, he looked across at you warily. Shoving three fries into your mouth, you felt yourself growing irritated. He was the one that wanted to talk. No, actually, he was the one who needed to talk.

“How did you know where I worked?”

Jin glanced down, a guilty look on his face. “I saw your lanyard when I got your phone. Had to Google the building.”

Oh. You opened your mouth to reply, but paused, unsure what to say. Jin however, was continuing. It seemed like he’d finally gained the courage to explain himself.

“I’m truly sorry for running off and leaving you like that.” He looked into your eyes, his gaze serious as if he was desperate for you to see how sincere he was being. “I didn’t plan it, I want you to know that. I found the water cooler with every intention to come back and talk but I…” He let his eyes fall to the table as he trailed off, idly pulling a shred of lettuce out of his burger.

You kept watching his face, the process of demolishing your food slowing down. He was ashamed of himself, that much was obvious.

“I drunk a lot of water, and then I poured you some, but I just…” He looked at you again, sounding remorseful, defeated almost. “I freaked out, ____. I couldn’t think straight.”

Silence stretched between you as you processed what he was telling you. He wasn’t making excuses for himself, he was just being honest with you. Your anger simmered down.

“Jin,” you finally sighed, not wanting to make it this easy for him, but feeling bad for him either way. “Freaking out was to be expected. I took you by surprise telling you like that.” But he still shouldn’t have left without letting you know.

He nodded his head, mulling your words over. “But then… I don’t think there would have been an un-surprising way to tell me.”

The corner of your mouth twitched, fighting a smile. He had a point.

Letting out a breath, he ran a hand over his face. “I hate that that was one of your first impressions of me… Insensitive, heartless, just a terrible person in general… I could go on.”

“I don’t think any of those things,” you informed him, making his eyebrows lift slightly. “I don’t know you well enough to begin forming opinions on you.”

He had disappointed you and hurt you, and you had wondered briefly what kind of person he truly was, but it wasn’t fair to just write him off. He deserved a chance. He was here now. He knew what he’d done was shitty, that was obvious. Your baby deserved to know their father, you couldn’t tell him to leave you alone because your feelings had been hurt. Even though the thought had crossed your mind when you’d first seen him. However, it wasn’t about you now. You had to think of glob.

Jin shook his head. It seemed like he didn’t think he deserved your kindness. “I didn’t even ask how the baby was after you fainted. I just ran off like a fucking idiot. I left you stranded at the hospital.”

Hearing him swear was pretty refreshing, and it made you smile. As did it make you remember a few things from That Night. You were unstoppable it seemed, even during a situation like this.

“I wasn’t stranded,” you reassured, “and the baby is fine.” Your hand reflexively moved to your stomach underneath the table.

“And you?” Jin asked, looking relieved.

“I’m fine too. I was just stressed thinking of ways to find and tell you. I neglected my health, and I feel really guilty about it.”

“Hey, it’s not your fault at all,” he told you, frowning with concern. “It was a difficult situation to be in. I can’t even begin to imagine… and I didn’t make it any better.” He shook his head, as if to rid his thoughts. “You look a lot healthier.”

Unable to help it, you let out a small, definitely unattractive, snort. “Than the waxy, death warmed up me from Thursday night?”

Jin chuckled softly. “You said that, not me.” Then, he motioned to your forgotten burger and fries. “Eat your food, it’s going to get cold.”

Right. That’s why you’d come here. For a few minutes you both ate in silence, but it wasn’t particularly uncomfortable – despite everything. You were eating with a grovelling one-night stand, who had gotten you pregnant and then ran away once you’d dropped the news. You couldn’t make this stuff up. Fighting the urge to break into laughter, you covered your mouth with a napkin. As you glanced over at Jin, he smiled.

“I see you prefer greasy food over seafood. Noted.”

Your eyebrows shot up. What did that mean? Why did he need to remember that? Still, you politely replied. “I’m just so hungry I could eat a horse right now.”

“Is that like…some sort of craving thing?” He seemed slightly awkward to be asking such a thing. Not that you blamed him. This was new for him. New for you too, but you’d had longer to process.

“Maybe,” you shrugged. “I’m not too sure when cravings start.”

“I’ll look it up tonight,” he murmured, almost as if he was talking to himself. Then, he met your eyes, confessing something sheepishly. “I don’t know much about babies or children. My brother has two, but being an uncle’s different, right?”

“I would imagine so.”

You wanted to tell him you didn’t know much either. You had still been quite young when your half-siblings had been born. The words wouldn’t come out though. Maybe you were acting too closed off again. You didn’t mean to. It just felt strange to talk like this with him. You now knew he had a brother. Was he older? Younger? Should you ask? Maybe it would come across as prying. He didn’t owe you any details about his life after all.

“How did you get home from the hospital?” Jin asked after a moment, saving you from your irrational thoughts.

“Oh, I called my friend.” You tried to sound casual, not wanting him to dwell on what he had done any longer.

It didn’t work.

“I really shouldn’t have left you,” he said quietly, crumpling a napkin in his fist.

“It’s fine, Jin,” you reassured, surprising yourself with how understanding you were being. Or maybe it wasn’t a surprise at all. Anger having faded, you were thinking clearly again. Privately you had been holding out for him to appear. You were happy he had. You gave him a little smile. “I’m just glad you’re here now.”

He returned the action, his tense shoulders relaxing. “I’m glad I’m here, too.” He leaned in, gaze steady. “I want to be here. For the baby. If you’ll have me.”

“You mean it?”

He nodded. “I spent the entire weekend thinking, going around and around. There was only one option.” He paused, holding your eyes with his. “I want to be a father to our baby. Whatever you want. Whatever you need. No questions asked.”

You felt your heart flutter, a strong wave of emotion washing over you. You didn’t realise how much you had wanted to hear that from him, and the fact that having the baby was the only option for him as well, no thought of an abortion. You felt instant relief. All those sleepless nights, all the anxiety and overthinking… This right here, in the middle of a crowded fast-food restaurant, was the perfect scenario. This was what you had wanted.

“Glob will be happy to hear that,” you said without thinking, an easy grin on your face.

Jin’s eyebrows pinched together, puzzled. “Glob?”

“Oh…right.”

Damn Yuna and her stupid nickname.

“Sorry. Yuna came up with that nickname when I found out and it’s just sort of stuck. Unfortunately.”

Wait. He didn’t even know who Yuna was.

“Yuna’s the one you were with that night, right?”

Or maybe he did. You remembered briefly talking about her That Night, but not if you’d mentioned her by name. You obviously had though, and he had a very good memory.

“Yeah, that’s her.”

“And Glob is our baby,” he laughed.

The way he kept saying ‘our baby’ was making you feel strange (in a good way). He said it so freely, like it was the most natural thing in the world.

“Okay, it’s a weird nickname, but I can get on board with it,” he continued to laugh.

You joined in before sipping your drink. For the first time in over a week you felt relaxed.

Jin brought a fry to his mouth, and glanced at you, his plump lips curving into a smile. Then he shook his head slightly, beginning to eat.

“What?”

He smiled wider. It really was a devastating smile. It made him even more handsome. “It’s nothing, I just…” His face contorted for a moment before he carried on. “I was terrified you’d hate me. I had no other way of contacting you, so I had to wait until today. I thought it would be too late…”

“Late would have been a few weeks from now,” you replied simply.

He looked at you carefully, smiling again, and then said in a joking tone: “You’re pretty intimidating, do you know that?”

“Me?” you laughed in disbelief. Shouldn’t it be the other way around?

“Yeah,” he chuckled. “Just like that night…”

Your gazes held for a moment before you averted yours, brushing him off. “You’re obviously very easily intimidated then.”

He shrugged casually. You could feel him staring at you, but you didn’t look him in the eyes again. “Only when it comes to very beautiful women.”

You face heated up immediately. What the hell? Was he flirting with you again? Despite everything that had happened? You cleared your throat, deciding not to reply. There was no fitting response to that anyway. But he had very noticeably embarrassed you, so he probably didn’t need one.

A few moments later, his tone was serious again, gentle and earnest. “I’m just so thankful you’ve given me a chance.”

You found the courage to look him in the eyes, staring at him pointedly. “Just promise not to run off again?”

He began to laugh, knowing you were teasing him. “I promise.” It was a unique sound, sort of dorky. You hadn’t heard it during That Night.

“Can I just ask something?” you said, again feigning seriousness. Jin’s expression shifted and he nodded. “Be honest. Was it payback for when I did the same?”

This time you laughed with him. Maybe you were giddy with the good news. You hadn’t laughed properly for days.

“You’ve taken this a lot better than I expected,” you mused, which earned you a ‘REALLY?’ look from him. You laughed harder. Okay, you’d meant after he’d run off. He seemed to have processed the news fairly easily after the initial shock. It was a pleasant surprise, but still… You had not been expecting it.

Jin gave you a small smile. “It was a rough couple of days, not gonna lie, but it…it was mostly down to guilt for leaving you.” He didn’t give you a chance to respond. “It still feels surreal, don’t get me wrong, but, it happened. It’s happening. I’m going to be a dad.” His smile grew proud.

You looked down at the table, his happiness overwhelming you. Surreal, indeed. “Hey, I was thinking…” you started awkwardly. “We could take a paternity test, if you like. If you want to know for sure—”

“Oh god, no,” he stopped you, looking mortified. “That stupid question I asked you back at the hospital, ignore it. I was… I was being an idiot.”

You regarded him carefully. It wasn’t that stupid a question. It had momentarily offended you, yes, but in his defence, you were a complete stranger to him. How could he be so sure the baby was his? It was, obviously, but only you knew that for certain. He was very trusting. Naïve, maybe, but then you remembered he was the CEO of a successful gaming company. Something he didn’t know you knew yet.

“Okay, well, either way,” you replied, “you’re definitely the father. I haven’t slept with anyone else.” In a long time, you finished off in your head. “And while we’re on the topic,” – you looked around, careful to keep your voice low – “I really was on birth control. I don’t want you to think I was lying when I said that. I don’t know what happened for certain, and I’m really sorry.”

“Hey, don’t be sorry,” he frowned, his tone just as quiet as he leaned in. “I chose not to wear a condom, right? I could have easily gotten one.”

It struck you then how odd this conversation was to have in such a crowded place. It was comical actually. At least your table wasn’t attached to someone else’s, in fear of being overheard.

“These things happen,” Jin continued, “and we shouldn’t be sorry, because now we-we’ve…” He trailed off, chuckling awkwardly. “Ah,” he tried again, “we’ve created… —What’s a non-cheesy way to say this?”

“We made a baby?” you laughed.

“Yeah,” he grinned. “We’ve created another human.”

You grimaced. “Don’t scare me. I’m the one that’s going to be carrying said new human around for 9 months.”

That made him laugh, and for some reason it made you feel good. You had made him laugh quite a lot That Night. He’d made you laugh too…

“Sorry,” he apologised, hands up. Your eyes fell to his forearms – he’d rolled up his sleeves to eat. No man should look that good in a cardigan. “So…have you told anyone else yet?”

His question interrupted your pointless observations. “Besides Yuna, no. I wanted you to know as soon as possible, and to be honest, the thought of telling my family is a little…” – you gritted your teeth together, shuddering – “given the situation.”

“No, I get it. I doubt it’s what your parents want to hear, really. Knocked up by a stranger…”

You laughed softly. He’d hit the nail on the head… Amongst other things. “What about you?”

Jin looked down. “I didn’t think it was appropriate to start telling people, what with the way I reacted.”

“You should tell someone you’re close with at least,” you suggested gently. “It’s your news too. And… we all need someone to be there for us.”

Despite Yuna’s lack of tact most of the time, she was the closest person to you, and that would never change. Without her, these past couple of days included, you wouldn’t know where you’d be. She’d always been there for you. Jin had to have somebody like that in his life, right?

He looked up at your words, his lips parting as if he wanted to say something, but then he stopped himself, swallowing before nodding in agreement. “You know,” he said after a couple of seconds. “We should probably start getting to know one another properly now.”

“We should,” you agreed, smiling a little. You needed to stop being strangers. “You already know my name, age – if you remember. it?”

He had told you his age too, but it wasn’t until you’d seen it online had you been reminded. It had been your mission to completely forget about That Night before you found out you were pregnant. Now you felt guilty.

“I do,” he chuckled. “I remember everything you said to me.”

Ignoring the potential subtext of his words – and ignoring the way your cheeks grew hot – you continued listing things off. “My place of work… My best friend’s name… That I may or may not have cravings for greasy food now… Which by the way, nobody knows but you.”

“I consider myself blessed.”

Your mouth quirked up. “What about you?

“Name, age,” – he lifted up his fingers as he reeled things off – “I’m not big on greasy food, to be honest.” Yet he had eaten some with you. “I have two best friends. Hoseok and Jungkook.”

You repeated the names inside your mind, hoping to remember them, and happy to learn he did in fact have people he could confide in.

“And hey, uh,” he chuckled uneasily, attempting to look you in the eyes but failing. “This is awkward, but I, um, I told you I worked at AGS, right?”

You knew what was coming immediately, almost wanting to rush in and put him out of his misery, but then you would have to admit to Googling him. So instead, you nodded.

“Well, I,” he stopped to swallow, and then gave another awkward chuckle. “I, uh…I actually own AGS.” He managed to make eye contact. “I’m the CEO.”

“I know,” you admitted. He was looking so guilt ridden, you couldn’t not. “Well, I knew you were the CEO, but I didn’t know you actually owned the company.”

They were most of the time different things. Especially if the business was successful – and not to mention sizeable. He’d created a gaming company? Impressive. Actually, you were stunned to be quite honest, too many questions on the tip of your tongue, but you held back because: 1. You didn’t want to appear nosey and 2. He was looking completely baffled right now.

“How did you know?”

You pushed away your mortification in a bid to explain yourself. Although, if you thought about it, Googling him hadn’t been so bizarre. He had searched Artkive too, to find out where it was located. Granted, you were just an average employer, with zero web presence, so if he had looked up your name, all he would have found were barely updated social media profiles, but still. He’d found you via the Internet. Just like you had found him.

You gave him the condensed version but made sure to mention your daily stakeouts from inside Café Cosy and the humiliating phone call with front desk. That was how you’d found out he was the CEO after all.

“Oh, god,” he said through a slight laugh. “I’m sorry. That sounds so awkward.”

“It was!” you exclaimed, a laugh of your own escaping. You were glad to see the funny side now. Last week it had been anything but. Regarding him, you narrowed your eyes. “Do you make it a habit of sleeping with people and then getting your receptionist to palm them off?”

Jin chuckled, but his face had turned a little red. Was he embarrassed that you’d teased him? “No, I already said that night was a one off for me.”

Either way, his ‘that night’ sounded very different to your ‘That Night.’ He said it a lot more casually, while you on the other hand, only had to think those two words before you got flustered as the memories immediately appeared once again.

“But I am sorry I didn’t tell you.”

“It’s fine,” you shrugged. “I just thought it was a safety precaution.”

“Safety precaution?” He seemed lost.

“Well, yeah, so you don’t have people throwing themselves at you left and right,” you explained awkwardly.

He snorted, surprising you. “I’ve never experienced that before.” You raised an eyebrow, sceptical. He was obviously rich and looked like that. You had your doubts he was telling the truth. “Really,” he laughed, before turning bashful. “I just… I didn’t want to make it seem as though I was bragging.”

Surprised by how genuine he sounded, you smiled. “Alright, well don’t worry, because I won’t try to extort you for all your money now that I know.”

You probably didn’t know him well enough to joke around like that, but he seemed to find it funny, laughing again.

“That’s good to know. Although… I mean, our baby can have whatever they want – and you, too.” He held your gaze. “I’ll look after you both.”

Speechless, your mouth opened and then closed again. What could you say to that? It wasn’t something you’d particularly thought about, but in hindsight, maybe you should have. To save you from this awkward moment. Should you be offended? Or thankful for his generosity? Or maybe you should just not feel anything at all… Despite not being interested in his money, it only made sense he would want to help you out. You didn’t need it personally, but his baby would.

“Let’s just get to that as it comes,” you replied finally, not wanting to get into it right now.

“Sure.” Jin sat back, shaking his head at himself. “Sorry, didn’t mean to make things awkward.”

“It wasn’t awkward until you said that.” At your words he looked up, stricken – and then he saw your grin. “I’m kidding!”

He relaxed a little, chuckling under his breath.

After your conversation gradually drew to a close, Jin offered to drive you home, and you gladly accepted. His car was still parked at his office so you walked together, making small talk as you went. You already felt a lot more relaxed around him, which probably shouldn’t be that surprising, really. He’d made you feel relaxed enough to sleep with him That Night. There was a friendliness about him, a warmth. A major positive considering you were going to parent together. Thinking this, you smiled to yourself. Despite all your worries these past 10 days or so, it was clear to see now that Jin would have no problem stepping up. He was a good person, and even though you hardly knew him, you were confident he’d be a good father.

Catching you, Jin asked: “What’s that smile for?”

For a moment, you recalled him asking you the exact same thing as you raced to the nearest hotel. You had been smiling from sheer anticipation and excitement then, and now… Well, you guessed you were still feeling both those things, but in a different way now…

“Nothing,” you smiled harder. “Today’s just turned out to be a good day, that’s all.”

His own smile grew as he agreed. “Yeah, it has.”

Jin’s car was nice, to put it simply. You’d been too out of it to pay attention last time. You didn’t need to know one thing about cars (no, but really, you didn’t even know how to drive) to understand this thing was expensive. The rich smell of leather was more than enough, and you vaguely remembered curling up in the passenger’s seat as sleep overcame you a few awful nights ago. You smiled again. Jin had been kind then too, driving you to the hospital and staying with you…

Parked outside your home, you exchanged numbers, Jin assuring you he would keep in contact often. He led a busy life, but he promised you he’d be there at the drop of a hat if you needed something. More than thankful, you made movements to exit his car, but he called you back suddenly.

“You know what you said earlier?”

“Hm?” you wondered, needing him to be specific.

He looked down, a little awkward. “About we all need someone to be there for us?”

You nodded, even though he couldn’t see.

He hesitated. “Well, I’m just putting it out there,” – he looked at you again, something unreadable in his eyes – “but I can… We can be there for one another, if you’d like to try.”

You stared at him blankly, confused by what he was saying. “What do you mean?”

He chuckled uneasily and rubbed his face. “Sorry, I’m terrible at this stuff.” Taking a breath, as if he was attempting to gain courage, he spoke in a rush. “I mean, if you want to, we could try and see where this goes. It’s backward I know—”

“No,” you cut in, completely taken aback. Then, belatedly, seeing the look on his face, you realised how rude you’d sounded. Tongue-tied, you tried to explain yourself. “I don’t expect that, Jin,” you managed finally. “I don’t want you to feel like you have to give more than you need to.”

“I don’t feel like th—”

“I know this isn’t the ideal scenario,” you continued, aware you were talking over him but couldn’t stop. “We’re practically strangers and hardly know anything about one another except the bare minimum, but we’ll work it out.” You smiled at him. “Just knowing you want to be involved means the world to me. I don’t expect you to step up like…that.” When he didn’t respond you prompted softly: “Okay?”

Jin stared at you for a moment before averting his gaze and chuckling softly. “Yeah… Ha, that was kind of presumptuous of me. I’m sorry.” He sounded embarrassed.

“No,” you replied. “It wasn’t. It was actually really nice.” Hearing that, he glanced at you curiously. “But I’m not looking for that, and I imagine neither are you.” Then, you chuckled. “Trying to have a relationship with the stranger carrying your baby is just… I doubt you really want to do that.”

“You’re not a stranger,” he insisted with a frown. “Not anymore.”

You sighed softly. “I guess. I just… I want our baby to have the happiest life. Happy parents make a happy baby. The last thing we should do is force something that we don’t really want.”

Jin opened his mouth as if he wanted to say something but closed it again. You took his silence as agreement.

“We’ll get this co-parenting thing down, I know we will,” you grinned encouragingly.

He grinned back, glancing down. “Yeah, of course we will.”

Opening the car door again, you stepped out.

“Bye, ____.”

“Bye, Jin.” You turned back to him. “Thanks for the ride home.”

Nodding his head, he gave you a wave. “I’ll text you tomorrow,” he called as you closed the door behind you.

You gave him your fast becoming popular two thumbs up and internally cringed at yourself as you rushed inside your house.

Seokjin stayed parked up for a few minutes after you left, processing everything that had just happened. He could feel the embarrassment hot against his face. Thankfully, he didn’t think you’d noticed.

Running a hand through his hair, he hung his head. What the hell were you thinking, you fool, he chided himself. Why had he suggested something like that? So out of the blue?

Things were different from how they were a few days ago – finding out he was going to be a father aside. On Thursday, when he’d seen you at Café Cosy, he felt as though it was a sign from the universe. All his wildest dreams come true. The dormant romantic in him finally able to celebrate. He had spent the three weeks previous unable to stop thinking about you. Wishing he’d woken up before you, regretting that he’d never asked where you worked, imagining bumping into you in the street… The list went on, and it was very long one. He had felt as though he was losing his mind. Even Hoseok and Jungkook were baffled by his infatuation.

Seokjin couldn’t explain it. You’d come out of nowhere and then disappeared just as quick, but you had lingered there, in his mind, in his body…

For him, that night had been amazing because your chemistry together had been unexplainable. And not only sexually, although truthfully, it had been one of the deciding factors – he’d never been so turned on in his entire life as he had been around you. But regardless of that, there was a spark there, sex or not. He had never felt a connection like it, and he didn’t care if he was being dramatic. His mother had been trying to find him the perfect match for years, yet he had never been interested enough to see if it could happen. To believe that it could happen.

And then you’d come along and knocked him for six.

However, it seemed like he was the only one who felt like that. Which is why you had left before he’d had a chance to wake up. Bottom line was, you hadn’t wanted to see him again, and the only reason that didn’t work out was because you were now pregnant with his baby. He had to accept that to be able to stop the way he’d been feeling for the past month. In a moment of weakness, the situation still very unreal, he’d made an idiot out of himself and awkwardly put you on the spot.

What was he expecting to happen? You’d agree to his crazy proposal and you’d start dating and fall in love? Jesus, he needed a good night’s sleep just to clear his mind. You still saw him as a stranger, for crying out loud.

Although, what you said had made complete and utter sense. Forcing something between the two of you would be a disaster. It would only ruin things if it didn’t work out. But then… he hadn’t been suggesting you begin a relationship immediately. He had just wanted to give it a chance, to see where it could lead if you both opened up to the possibility. He was just terrible at explaining things, despite being a successful businessman. Or maybe he was just terrible at love… Maybe all these years of being single had addled his brain. A single one-night stand and he thought it was the love story of the century.

He let his head fall back against the headrest, feeling at a loss. This wasn’t how he’d imagined having his first child, and he doubted you thought any different. Whenever he’d imagined having his own family someday, he was married and in love. Although, these days, for the longest time actually, the idea of a family felt as though it was out of reach. Work had become his life a long time ago, leaving little to no room for relationships and love – not that he had much desire for it back in the early years. Now? Now, he was getting older and realising making money wasn’t the be-all end-all of life. Although, pompously, maybe he could say that now he’d made his fortune.

With a sigh, he started up the car. He had more important things to concentrate on now, instead of worrying about his ego getting a bashing from you. He was having a baby. He was going to be a dad. Technically, he was already one – in the making – right now. He needed to put his all into it, his guilty conscious still there after he’d left you at the hospital. No matter how many times he said sorry, words were just that. He needed to show you with actions.

He admired you so much, confusing feelings aside. He had run off and abandoned you when you’d needed him the most and yet you had given him another chance so easily. He was aware he didn’t deserve it, but beyond thankful that you had heard him out. He knew without a doubt this entire situation had been – and was – so much harder for you than him. He couldn’t begin to imagine the stress you’d been under since you’d found out the news, and he had only made that worse when he’d left you. He’d made you believe that he didn’t want anything to do with the baby when that wasn’t the case.

He was serious about this, no matter the slight shock he was still in.

He wanted this, no matter how it was.

Sometimes life didn’t work out how people imagined it to, and that was all right.

He had always been an adapter, a hard worker.

And he would work hard not to be a stranger to you anymore…

Written 2022. Please refrain from posting my work elsewhere. No translations allowed. © floralseokjin 2022

#seokjin fanfic #bts fanfic #jin fanfic #fic:9mtfil #floralseokjin:writings

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jukeboxjackal · 3 years ago

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Study Buddy pt. 3

Jock! Carol Danvers x fem reader

Warnings: cursing?

Description: more feelings arise after all seven days of studying are up

A/n: sorry for the long wait! I’ve just been busy as of lately and I lost some motivation. This will be the LAST part of this series. It was great writing this!

The rest of you and Carols studying days went on okay. However, what you didn’t expect was to start actually liking her.

You see, the second day you both actually had a decent conversation. And then the third day went on and that was when you both kept laughing so much you both couldn’t breathe. And the fourth day was when she opened up about herself, and you did too. And by the time the fifth day came, you didn’t want to leave. And when the sixth day came across, you started forgetting about your ex and starting thinking about a life with Carol. And then finally, the seventh day came. That’s when you two kissed. Fuck. That’s when you insisted on going back home by yourself, sure it took 26 minutes but whatever.

‘Dammit, dammit, dammit!’ Those words kept repeating in your head as you ran home. That’s where we are right now. Currently, it is 1:38 pm on a Sunday and you are on your doorstep. Shakily taking out your key, you ran up to your room without even bothering to close your door. ‘Fuckk!’ You yelled into your pillow. Thankfully, your parents wouldn’t be home till an hour or so.

You didn’t mean for this to happen. 𝘠𝘰𝘶 𝘥𝘪𝘥 𝘯𝘰𝘵 𝘮𝘦𝘢𝘯 𝘵𝘰 𝘧𝘢𝘭𝘭 𝘪𝘯 𝘭𝘰𝘷𝘦 𝘸𝘪𝘵𝘩 𝘩𝘦𝘳. Her as in Carol Fucking Danvers.

Finally calming down, you shut your door and hopped in bed in silence. Well almost silence. Since Carol kept blowing up your phone.

#1 Study Buddy

Hey u ok?

Did I do something?

Please answer

Y/N please

Hey

Call me? I want to know what I did wrong

You let out a giggle/ snort combination as you saw the name she insisted on for her contact. But then you read the messages. Over and over. Finally putting on your big girl pants, you called her. She answered on the first ring. “Hey (Y/N) what did I do? Are you okay? I’m sorry?-“

You cut her off. “No, Carol, it’s me. Fuck, I- I didn’t mean for this to happen” you knew she was listening intently as you continued. “I don’t know why, but this feels so wrong yet so so right at the same time. I just, I just don’t know.”

“(Y/N) you know what else feels so wrong but so right? Me saying this. I love you. I’ve liked you since forever. I just wanted you to pay attention to me and see me for who I am, not just that one asshole jock.” You laughed at that, but then you took in what she said. “You serious?” You said. “The most I have been in my entire life.” she replied. “Come pick me up” was all you said, before hanging up.

And sure enough, in around 7 minutes, she was there. You could barely open the door before she tackled you into a hug. “Please, make this last forever.” You hugged her back in silence. Until she broke it saying “Will you be my girlfriend?” To which you replied with a kiss and an “I’ve been waiting.”

———

The next day came and you and your new girlfriend came into class hand in hand about 10 minutes early. “So I see my plan worked.” Mrs. Griffin said. “I am pleasantly surprised.” You and Carol smiled, because her plan did work. Now you both got along better than ever. “We’re ready for the test” Carol said confidently. “Oh yeah, that test is next week. I only said that it was today because I was tired of how you both acted towards each other.” And with a grin, she walked walked away.

“I-“ you said as Carol laughed. “Well, I wouldn’t have it any other way.” “And plus, we can spend the rest of this week getting to know each other better” Carol said with a smirk. “Like what?” You said suspiciously. “Movies tonight?”

“Of course.”

#marvel imagines #carol danvers imagine #carol danvers x female reader #jock!carol #open requests

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watchmegetobsessed · 4 years ago

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Hey Daddy - Bucky Barnes

a/n: so this one is a little more... lighthearted? idk but it was based on THIS request!

pairing: Bucky X Reader

word count: 1.9k

summary: You join Peter and his friends for a game of Truth Or Dare but you wish you stayed in your room when MJ challenges you to do a task that will definitely out your secret relationship with Bucky.

masterlist

You totally forgot Peter would have his friends over for the night, so you’re slightly surprised when you find him with Ned and MJ in the kitchen, but it’s a pleasant one. You’ve been spending a lot of time with him, being the youngest of the adults in the tower, you developed a great friendship with the youngster and his friends.

“Oh, hello guys! Good to see you again!” you beam at the three of them, Ned greeting you with a little wave and a stunned smile on his face. Peter has recently revealed that Ned might have a tiny crush on you, which you find cute. Though you’re more than a decade older than him, you find it endearing he is crushing on you out of all the amazing women on the team.

MJ nods in your way as she munches on her sandwich, if you didn’t know her better you’d think she is annoyed by you judging by the look on her face, but you’ve learned by now that this is her default expression, almost a happy one.

“Hi Y/N!” Peter greets you smiling. “How was your day?” he asks lightly. He is such a good kid, knows his manners and cares so much for others. The men in the tower like to tease him about his soft behavior, but you think it’s such a great trait.

“A little tiring. Training kicked my ass today, but it was fine. What are you guys up to?” you ask, grabbing yourself a canned soda from the fridge.

“MJ wants to play truth or dare, but only because she wants to make us do embarrassing stuff,” Peter huffs looking at the girl who just smiles with a shrug.

“Oh, I love that game! Used to play it a lot at parties too!” you smirk, remembering the times you played with your friends in the basement of your mom’s house.

“You want to play with us?” MJ offers.

“If you don’t mind…”

“Not at all!” Peter smiles, happy to have another person join their little group. Glancing at Ned you see that he is now blushing, the tip of his ears turning red as he keeps his eyes fixed on the screen of his phone. Poor kid will have to learn how to function around women sooner or later.

The game starts out quite innocent, it’s not even the wild version where you’re drinking, though it popped into your head to pour yourself some wine. But then you decided to keep it PG rated for the kids’ sake.

But as more and more rounds go down, the tasks and questions are getting a little… spicy. When MJ turns to you and asks you the question of the game and you answer before you could even think about it, you know you are in trouble.

“Dare,” you answer and want to take it back right away, but you don’t want to look like such a pussy. But then MJ smirks at you devilishly and you consider just walking out before she ruins your whole life.

“Alright, text all the other Avengers ‘Hey Daddy’ and read the responses out loud.”

The boys gasp as you press your lips into a thin line, knowing well it won’t end good on your side. Especially because there is one person whose response you would rather not read out loud.

You’ve been close to Bucky since day one and though you both were a little ignorant towards your feelings, a few months ago you finally moved your relationship a little further than just being friends. However you both agreed it’s better kept as a secret, at least until you figure out where you really want to head together as a couple.

Now, if you text that message to Bucky there’s no way he won’t write back something that would bust your asses right away, but you can’t back out now, you can only hope he is busy doing something else and won’t pay attention to his phone.

Pulling your phone out of your pocket you lean onto the kitchen island as the kids start cheering for you being a badass and accepting the task.

“Just hey daddy, that’s all?” you ask as you open your contacts.

“Maybe add a winking face,” Ned suggests and you shoot him a glare that immediately turns his face red as he shuts his mouth.

“The winking face is a good idea,” MJ nods.

“Thanks, Ned,” you mumble under your breath as you start opening the text threads, sending them all the same message. Tony, Nat, Steve, Banner, Clint, Sam, Strange, even Rhodey and at the end of the list… Bucky.

“And what, now we wait?” Peter asks.

“Place the phone here so we see when you get a reply and you’ll read them, we can move on until then,” MJ tells you, bossing you around like you’re not even a highly trained special agent who could take her out in a blink of an eye.

The first reply comes from Nat who just asks if you’re drunk. Then comes Banner, who sounds offended that you think he could be your father, totally missing the point of the text. Tony teases you about always knowing you had a thing for him, Steve kindly tells you he only sees you as a sister, Clint just reads the text and doesn’t reply. Sam just sends a simple “control yourself” message back while Strange threatens you to block you if you send another text like this again. Rhodey doesn’t even reads it.

You start to feel relieved when about twenty minutes pass by and no reply comes from Bucky. The game moves on and you almost start to forget about the whole task when your phone lights up again and your breathing hitches when you see Bucky’s name appear on the screen.

“Oh, another reply!” MJ beams as she urges you to unlock the phone and read the reply. When you do so and see his text, you almost just hop off the stool and run out of the kitchen. You consider saying something else, pretending like he didn’t write what he did, but MJ doesn’t take the bullshit and her patience runs short so she simply snatches your phone out of your hand and reads the text herself.

“I specifically remember you saying you’re not into that stuff. What else are you keeping from me about our sex life?”

You let out a long and tired sigh as the room falls silent and they all just stare at you in confusion before MJ slowly slides the phone back to you.

“Our sex life? There’s… there’s a you and Bucky?” Peter asks quietly, not sure what to do with the new information. An anxious chuckle slips from between your lips as you try to find a way to get yourself out of this massive trouble, but nothing comes to your mind. You’ve fought aliens, assassins, you were captured, tortured, went on a hundred mission in your life, yet now three kids defeated you with a game of Truth or Dare.

“Well, um… It’s a funny story, you know—I don’t… fuck,” you mumble, scratching the back of your neck.

“Are you like… together or is it just a friends with benefits thing?” MJ question, shooting you a curious look.

You don’t get to answer, because just as you are about to open your mouth, the man in talk walks in, a puzzled look on his face, phone in his hand, probably still dwelling on your latest message. His eyes spot you first, but then he realizes that you’re not alone and he freezes. It’s not that Bucky doesn’t like Peter or his friends, he just feels so far away from people these days, let alone teenagers who are about a century younger than him.

“Oh,” he breathes out, slowly walking closer to you. “Hello guys,” he murmurs shyly, trying to put the picture together as his eyes fall back to you and he sees how uncomfortable you are. Before he could get another word out, MJ speaks up and just as always, her raw style doesn’t disappoint any of you.

“Don’t worry, your girlfriend is not really into the Daddy stuff.”

You almost choke on your own breath as you turn to shoot her a glare, your hand moving to grab Bucky’s arm gently, sensing him growing more and more anxious with each second.

“MJ, I don’t think Sergeant Barnes is the right person to joke around with,” Ned mumbles, avoiding to even look at Bucky as you let out an airy chuckle.

“G-Girlfriend? We are not—“ Bucky starts, but you cut him off.

“No use to deny, Buck. They know it.”

Bucky huffs, closing his eyes for a moment before he moves closer to you, his hand coming to rest on your lower back. Despite the absurdity of the situation, this small little gesture makes your heart pitter-patter in your chest.

“Is there any chance this could stay between us, kids?” you ask with a charming smile, turning to the three troublemakers.

“I don’t know, what do we get out of keeping it a secret?” Peter purses his lips, pretending to have the higher ground, but you already know what’s about to come.

Bucky’s vibranium arm snaps to the counter top as he shoots a death glare over to the poor kid and though he definitely looks like he is ready to kill any moment, you know that it’s all just an act.

“How about I don’t rip your guts out, kid? That enough?” Bucky growls and while all three of them take a step back with wide eyes and dry throats, you just shake your head chuckling, placing a hand to his hard chest.

“Buck, no need to go all winter soldier on them. They’ll keep our secret, right?” you ask with an innocent smile and all three of them start nodding wildly, as if they just saw a ghost.

Seeing their reaction you realize it’s better if the game ends here and you let them be on their own. You thank for the fun time before grabbing Bucky’s arm and pull him out of the kitchen, heading up to your rooms.

“You shouldn’t have scared them that badly, Buck,” you scold him, but you still actually find it kind of funny, seeing their pale faces and fearful eyes at your boyfriend’s tough guy act.

“Well, they scare me too sometimes,” he mumbles shrugging. “Especially that MJ girl… she is just… weird.”

You can’t help but laugh at his words, a six feet tall super soldier with a metal arm being scared of a teenage girl with a big mouth, that’s quite an interesting concept.

“Hey,” you stop him before the two of you would part in the hallway. He turns back and his blue eyes soften on you. “Do you want to… sneak into my room?” you ask, biting into your bottom lip as you smirk up at him, sliding a hand up his chest, cupping his cheek in your palm. “We could have some fun… Daddy.”

“Wait, are you really into the daddy stuff?” he asks with wide eyes, making you cackle with your head falling back.

“Just shut up and come to my room,” you chuckle, pressing your lips against his as you pull him into your bedroom, shutting the door closed behind you.

Thank you for reading, please like and reblog if you enjoyed it!

#bucky #barnes #bucky barnes #bucky imagine #bucky fanfiction #bucky fanfics #bucky barnes fanfiction #bucky barnes fanfic #bucky x you #bucky barnes x you #bucky x y/n #bucky barnes x y/n #bucky x reader #bucky barnes x reader #bucky oneshot #bucky one shot #bucky barnes oneshot #bucky barnes one shot

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heyiwrotesomethings · 4 years ago

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It’s Been Too Long

Shinobu Kochou x She/Her Reader

A/N: Alright Shinobu Community, take a fuckin’ sip babes. It’s kind of a long one. My brain was like, friends to enemies to friends to lovers? To which I replied, this is going to be simultaneously too long and too short. I love me some slow burn but also I can’t justify putting that much time into something like this lol. While writing this I learned that one becomes a Hashira by killing a demon moon OR killing at least fifty demons. I didn't know that before, but I was in too deep to fix things. Y’all are a Kinoe rank that probably should be a Hashira given how much slaying you’ve done, sorry! As far as warnings go, I think we’re good. Unless fighting and misunderstandings aren’t your thing. It’ll all be better in the end though! Word Count: 15,088

The estate was dark and bleak. It had rained for nearly a week straight, the patter of water against the solid structure of the tiled roof was a near constant companion to the blank static of despair that clouded everyone’s minds.

Kochou Kanae had died of lethal injuries bequeathed to her by a high ranking demon who had left her to bleed out as the sun made its appearance. Perhaps if it had risen even just a few minutes prior, she could have evaded such a cruel fate.

Shinobu had found her of course, the world is just that cruel, or perhaps kind in giving her sister that closure, to be able to see her one last time before she took her last gurgling breath.

It was appropriate, the rain. After the funeral it was a temporary reminder of the warmth that had been reaped from the estate, never to be felt again in this lifetime. Not that (Y/n), Kanao, Aoi, or the youngest residents of the estate needed a reminder. Shinobu certainly didn’t either.

“Shinobu, you didn’t come to dinner. Please try to eat something.” (Y/n) coaxed, sliding the door open. The only light came from a small lantern inside the swirling gloom of the room, highlighting Shinobu hunched over her desk with her head in her hands. “Shinobu?”

“It’s only been a week.” (Y/n) strained to hear the taut whisper of the girl who had grown to be her closest friend. The girl who had given her a second chance at life when she had nowhere else to go. It hurt to hear her sound so broken. “It feels like time is standing still and going too fast at the same time.”

(Y/n) set the light meal in front of Shinobu and leaned against the desk, the wood creaked slightly as she did so. “I know what you mean. I feel the same.”

It wasn’t the first time they’ve talked like this. To be survivors of such unthinkable atrocities, one could go crazy keeping it all locked inside. The guilt, fear, helplessness... sometimes the memories played on loop night after night, waking up to the screams in their minds making sick harmonies with their own.

“I don’t know what I’m supposed to do.” Shinobu spoke tentatively after a moment of drizzling static tapping against the roof. She raised herself just enough to wrestle a paper out from under her arms and slid it to (Y/n). “Oyakata-sama has sent me a summons to meet with him and the Hashira. He intends for me to take,” Shinobu’s voice grew tighter and she could not bring herself to finish, instead a painful sounding intake of air was all that was audible.

(Y/n) took the paper, holding it close to her face as she squinted, the dull light of the lantern made the letter a bit difficult to read, but the message was clear.

“He wants you to take her place.” (Y/n) frowned, a pained gleam pricked at the corners of her eyes.

“It’s been too long, but yet, not long enough,” Shinobu’s fists tightened, “I know the world hasn’t stopped spinning, demons haven’t stopped killing, but why do they want to replace her so quickly? Why are they willing to toss her aside? I don’t...”

“Shinobu,”

Shinobu finally looked up at (Y/n), angry and mournful tears tracked down her face, “I’m not my sister, I’m not Hashira material. I can’t fill the hole she left, (Y/n)!”

(Y/n) abandoned her perch on the desk to crouch beside Shinobu, enveloping her in her arms. Shinobu tightly grasped her back, watery gasps and sharp inhales fell from her lips as she tried to gain control of her breathing once more.

“Oyakata-sama knows you aren’t Kanae. You’re strong in your own right, Shinobu. He wouldn’t breach the subject if he didn’t think you could succeed by your own merits.”

“I have to keep the estate in order, the infirmary, the girls... I can’t take all this responsibility—“

“You don’t have to,” (Y/n) cut her off, the words came a bit sharper than she meant them too, “you’re not alone Shinobu. We can all have our own parts to play. You don’t have to shoulder this all by yourself.”

“Thank you.” Shinobu’s voice cracked.

They had stayed up well into the night. They hardly talked, the two young girls sat huddled together, holding each other tightly. No matter how much they’ve been hurt, time continues moving forward. Just because a boat has been shredded against a reef, that doesn’t mean the waves will grant reprieve from their assault. No, one is expected to keep swimming or to swallow the salty brine and drown. The Butterfly Estate’s allotted time for grief had passed. Now they were being given the not so subtle command that it was time to get back to work.

***

“I wish you could come with me.” Shinobu said the next morning as she sat on the engawa to put on her shoes. “Even if they made you wait outside I would feel a bit better.”

“You’ll be okay, we’ll be thinking about you all day and waiting for you to come back home.” (Y/n) assured, resting her hand on Shinobu’s back. She was almost afraid to touch the haori Shinobu now adorned, as if her hand would pass right through the material.

(Y/n) was surprised when she saw Shinobu wearing it instead of her usual short white haori, though she supposed there was comfort in holding this piece of her sister close. Perhaps the butterfly patterned haori could comfort Shinobu where (Y/n) and the others could not.

(Y/n) must have been staring too long because Shinobu leaned away from her hand, catching it with her own before (Y/n) could withdraw it completely. Shinobu squeezed the hand a moment, (Y/n) swore her heart froze upon seeing the ghostly smile painted over Shinobu’s lips.

“You’re right. No point in fretting over it, is there?”

“...Right,” (Y/n) blinked, “yeah. You’re going to do great.” (Y/n) managed a smile in return but she could feel the corner of her lips tremble at the effort. She wasn’t sure why, but this smile Shinobu was sporting sent chills down her spine.

“I’ll be off then,” Shinobu stood, releasing (Y/n)’s hand as she stepped away from the engawa, “Do make sure to keep everything in order while I’m away.”

“Of course!” (Y/n) winced at her own volume and Shinobu exhaled a quiet chuckle before turning away to make her way down the path. (Y/n) watched until the haunting haori could no longer be seen between the wisteria trees.

***

It was rather late when Shinobu returned. (Y/n) had just helped the youngest girls of the estate get ready for bed and was heading to the kitchens to prepare some tea to help her sleep. She had jumped in her skin when she saw the back of the butterfly patterned haori in the dim lantern light. Shinobu turned at the sound and sent a small, tired smile (Y/n)’s way.

“I thought I’d catch you here before you turned in for the night.” Shinobu spoke. “You almost always take a cup of tea to bed. I hope you don’t mind having some of what I’ve already prepared.”

It wasn’t the first time Shinobu caught her going to the kitchen to make tea. Though usually it was much later in the dead of night when nightmares and grief kept sleep at bay. (Y/n) wasn’t sure what kind of leaves or brewing Shinobu did, but her tea always managed to knock (Y/n) out cold into deep, dreamless bliss. Something about the way Shinobu was speaking was rubbing (Y/n) the wrong way however. There was none of the familiar attitude. The bashful bitterness that came with the sweetness of the tea. (Y/n) decided to shake it off and returned Shinobu’s tired smile. It would take time for things to seem normal again.

“You know me too well. Thank you.” (Y/n) graciously took the cup, relishing in the cup’s warmth and the relaxing scent that wafted off of the steam. “How did today go?”

“It was... fine.” Shinobu’s smile faltered and she quickly disguised it by sipping her own tea. “I’m officially a Hashira. Insect Pillar Kochou Shinobu.”

“It has a nice ring to it.” (Y/n) put in after a moment’s consideration hidden behind the guise of her clearing her throat. She didn’t know if a ‘congratulations’ would be what Shinobu would want to hear give the circumstances that led up to her new title.

“And how was holding down the fort?” Shinobu asked. It seemed she wanted to shift the topic of conversation away from herself. Not that (Y/n) could blame her.

“Everything went smoothly. Well, Aoi did get a bit aggravated with Kanao about one of her coin decisions but we worked it out. Sumi, Kiyo and Naho are picking up the recovery training lessons quickly and are doing very well. The Kakushi have been taking great care of the infirmary. All patients were still stable last I checked in.” (Y/n) reported.

“Thank you for keeping up with all of that.”

“I have to pull my weight around here somehow.” (Y/n) replied, hiding a yawn behind one hand.

“It’s getting late. You should get to bed before the tea kicks in any further.” Shinobu said, putting her own cup down.

“Aren’t you getting tired too?”

“I made myself a different brew, actually. I’ve got more work to do.” Shinobu allowed herself a little sly smile at the tiny frown (Y/n) wore as she looked into her own empty cup as if it had betrayed her somehow.

“Well, don’t forget you need to sleep too. Don’t overwork yourself.”

“Goodnight, (Y/n).” Shinobu called over her shoulder. She was already walking out of the kitchen.

“I mean it Shinobu. Promise me you’ll sleep tonight.” (Y/n) gently demanded, slipping into the hall to fall in step beside Shinobu.

“I’ll promise to try. Is that acceptable?” Shinobu asked, a bit of familiar snark came through and it made (Y/n) relax a bit and nod.

“Alright. Goodnight, Shinobu.”

At the end of the hall they broke off in different directions. Shinobu to the lab and (Y/n) to her room.

***

(Y/n) went through most of her morning routine before going out of her way to find the newly appointed Hashira. She hadn’t seen her since they parted last night. (Y/n) groaned inwardly, already assuming she’d find the young scientist still balancing equations and mixing beakers.

(Y/n) adjusted her butterfly hairpin before knocking her knuckles against the door, waiting for a reply.

“Shinobu?” (Y/n) had called out after another knock led to no reply. (Y/n) frowned and slid the door open of her own volition, closing it behind her once she was inside. It didn’t take long for her to find the exhausted girl hunched over an array of papers, dead asleep.

“When I told you to go to sleep last night, I had your own bed in mind, not a desk.” (Y/n) sighed quietly.

(Y/n) startled at another knock at the door.

“Who is it?” She asked, keeping her voice soft as to not disturb Shinobu.

“It’s Hayato, miss.” The muffled voice called. Ah, one of the Kakushi. “Kochou-sama has guests to attend to.”

“Set them up in the garden with tea, please. Kochou-sama will meet them just as soon as she finishes these papers.” (Y/n) said. It would not do to have news of the young master of the estate sleeping so late in the morning, and at her desk no less.

The Kakushi dismissed himself to carry out his orders and (Y/n)’ shoulders relaxed as his footprints faded down the hall. (Y/n) didn’t want to wake Shinobu, but if her presence was required, then the meeting must be important.

“Hey, Shinobu,” (Y/n) called softly, gently shaking Shinobu’s shoulders, “you have guests that need to see you.”

Shinobu managed to curl further into herself, mumbling a few curses under her breath that (Y/n) couldn’t help but giggle at.

“Maybe you’d feel better if you had actually gone to bed instead of passing out like this.”

“Who is it, what do they need?” Shinobu grumped, sitting up to stretch her abused spine.

“I’m not sure. A Kakushi came by to tell you about them. I asked him to set them up in the garden with tea.”

“Thank you for taking care of that,” Shinobu rubbed her eyes and stood, her chair scratching against the floor, “I should get going then.”

“Let me fix your hair quick at least.” (Y/n) said, already freeing Shinobu of her own butterfly clip. “Hold still.”

“It’s a little hard when you keep tugging your fingers through my hair.” Shinobu winced.

“Sorry, just a second.” (Y/n) spoke around the butterfly wing that she held between her lips as her fingers worked to gather Shinobu’s hair. Once Shinobu’s hair was neatly clipped back into place, (Y/n) circled her and smoothed out the wrinkles in Shinobu’s clothes the best she could before finally backing away with a satisfied nod.

“Are you done yet?” Shinobu asked, a faint dusting of blush powdered her cheeks.

“Yeah, you still look tired, but at least you look a little more presentable.” (Y/n) said, opening the lab door and ushering Shinobu through it.

“Presentable.” Shinobu scoffed. “Come with me to the garden?”

“I don’t know if that would be appropriate. I’m not sure who is visiting.”

“Just make yourself busy in the blooms. You live here, you can go where you please.”

“Okay, I’ll come.”

The young girls made their way outside, it was warm and sunny, a bit humid as well after all the rain the week before. The sweet smell of the flowers invited deeper breaths to swallow up the scent into every bronchiole of their lungs.

(Y/n) broke off from Shinobu with a little wave, giving a respectful acknowledgment to the people waiting with their tea before busying herself with the flora. Checking on the quality of the plants as Kanae had taught her. The memories spent with the older girl who had taught her so much made (Y/n) shiver despite the warmth of the sun beating down.

(Y/n) would on occasion, discreetly observe the progression of the meeting. The smile Shinobu wore as she spoke to the visitors unnerved her. Even just the way Shinobu was holding herself now, prim and proper, (Y/n) wondered what they could possibly be talking about.

Then the familiar cawing of a crow circling over her head broke (Y/n) from her thoughts. She released her gentle grip over the flower she had stopped to smell and craned her neck to see her crow calling out to her. A mission, her heartbeat picked up in pace. She hadn’t been on one since a few days before Kanae’s death. How out of practice could she be?

“Pardon the noise,” (Y/n) bowed. The meeting had paused in their hushed conversation to observe the bird as well. (Y/n) hardly gave Shinobu a glance as she past. Her fingers trembling slightly as she made her way back inside to retrieve her nichirin blade from her room. (Y/n)’s mind buzzed and her crow’s caws sounded muted and muffled, far away. She kept walking, willing her breaths to remain controlled. Her concentration broke as a hand reached out from behind her and tugged her back.

(Y/n) turned to meet Shinobu’s eyes. Though more subdued, the concern she saw there was genuine.

“(Y/n), I kept telling you to stop. Are you listening to me?”

“I’m sorry, I guess I was just focusing on the mission ahead.”

Shinobu breathed deeply releasing the air in a shaky exhale before gripping (Y/n)’s face in one hand, surprising her.

“No you weren’t.” Shinobu’s grip was firm, “You need to concentrate on your surroundings. I was almost yelling at you just now. I need to know you are going to be able to keep your head about you out there.”

(Y/n) tried to nod her head but Shinobu’s hand kept her head in place.

“I need to hear you say it.” Shinobu said.

“I can keep my head. I will.” (Y/n) swallowed uncomfortably.

Shinobu searched (Y/n)’s face, slowly releasing her grip from (Y/n)‘s jaw and instead grabbed at the neck of (Y/n)’s uniform pulling her so close their noses bumped.

“You better,” She spoke softly.

“I will,” (Y/n) repeated.

Shinobu untensed, her fingers released (Y/n)’s uniform and she wrapped her arms around her in a tight hug that (Y/n) quickly reciprocated.

“Your meeting,” (Y/n) recalled after a moment.

“I asked to be excused. I’m the master of the estate, I can get away with escaping for for a few minutes.”

“I wouldn’t make a habit out of it if I were you.” (Y/n) attempted to joke.

“Only when it matters.” Shinobu nodded seriously, causing (Y/n)’s heart to leap.

(Y/n)’s crow cawed impatiently and the girls parted. (Y/n) left to retrieve her blade and Shinobu watched her back as she left, her hands clenched into tight fists beneath the sleeves of her sister’s haori.

***

Night after night, the missions kept coming. (Y/n) had begun to wonder if she’d ever get to go home again as days became weeks. Scattered letters between waves of demon slaying were the best she could manage to make sure everyone back home knew she was alright.

Another night, a new moon. A few more nights and it would be a full month since she’d last seen everyone. She was glad she took the time to say goodbye before she left. She never imagined she’d be asked to work for so long without reprieve.

Another well timed flower breathing technique beheads another demon and (Y/n) falls against the trunk of a tree breathing hard. She is uninjured but greatly fatigued. The thought to sit and rest hardly enters her mind before her crow commands her eastward to eliminate another threat before dawn.

Breath after breath, technique after technique, night after night (Y/n) fought until everything ached and beyond. When she saw the the sun peak out over the horizon it was almost enough to bring (Y/n) to tears, but she never faltered. She had to stay strong. This was the life she chose to pursue. To save people from the same fate that befallen so many people she had cared about.

It was during an exceptionally hot day when the sun was at its highest point that (Y/n) flinched awake at the shrill squawks she had grown to loathe.

“What?” She hissed between her teeth, her fingers knotting in the grass that had served as her bed for the day.

“Return home to the Butterfly Estate! Return home to recover and rest! Await further instruction!”

(Y/n) lifted herself to rest on her elbows to stare wide-eyed at the bird sitting in the tree branch overhead. For the first time in that very long month, she allowed the tears to finally fall.

***

(Y/n) felt nervous coming back after so long. She opted to return from the rear entrance in an attempt to not garner too much attention. She allowed herself a tentative smile as the gardens came into view. Her fingers skimmed across the colorful blooms as she walked, freezing up only when she saw Shinobu collecting herbs in the distance. Her foot snapped a twig, alerting Shinobu to glance behind her.

“Hi, stranger.” Shinobu simpered, getting to her feet. “Oh!”

(Y/n) forgot all her previous worries and jogged up to Shinobu, picking her up with the added strength that she had built up in her month long absence and twirled her around with abandon.

“(Y/n)?” Shinobu chuckled with surprise, bracing her arms around (Y/n)‘s shoulders as she was flung around.

“I missed you!” (Y/n) sniffled, finally putting the girl down but still holding her tightly.

“I missed you too.” Shinobu said, rubbing (Y/n)’s back. “What took so long getting back, hm?”

“Mission after mission after mission.” came (Y/n)’s bitter reply. “I actually cried when my crow told me I could come home... I don’t know why I told you that. That’s embarrassing.”

Shinobu laughed, pulling back from (Y/n) to get a good look at her. “My, (Y/n), I can tell your time away had made you stronger. Even if you are still a bit of a crybaby.”

“Hey!” (Y/n) pouted.

“(Y/n) is back!”

“Woah!”

(Y/n) was sent stumbling backward a few steps by three blurs of white. Naho, Sumi and Kiyo spoke a mile a minute filling in (Y/n) on all the goings on of the estate. Aoi and Kanao came by soon after and gave (Y/n) their own greetings, expressing their happiness over the slayer’s return in their own ways.

It was good to be home, it was. But after a few days, (Y/n) really got a chance to see how different Shinobu had become.

The tone of her voice carried like a soft breeze and a polite smile could always be seen on her lips. Aoi reminded (Y/n) more of the Shinobu she remembered than the current Shinobu before her. It unnerved her. The way Shinobu would tilt her head just so and giggle daintily into her hand... it was like staring at a ghost.

(Y/n) thought she could get over the change, but she simply couldn’t. Not when staring into those dark, purple eyes. Oh, how they swirled with anger and despair. If Shinobu couldn’t fully believe in the persona she had crafted for herself, then (Y/n) wouldn’t either. Late one night while helping Shinobu in the lab, (Y/n) finally decided to confront her.

“Why do you keep smiling like that?” (Y/n) frowned, worrying the page of the textbook before her between her fingers.

“Hm? I’m afraid I don’t quite know what you mean.” Shinobu replied casually, smile still firmly in place as she crushed some herbs under her pestle.

“You do too know what I mean,” (Y/n) eyebrows furrowed slightly in aggravation, “why do you keep smiling like you’re okay when you’re clearly not?”

“What have I said or done that makes you think I’m not okay? I’m perfectly fine, (Y/n),” she chuckled, “you worry for nothing.”

“That mask might have everyone else fooled... or maybe they’re just complacent, but I’m tired of pretending nothing is wrong. Talk to me, Shinobu.”

“Don’t be ridiculous,” Shinobu shook her head, “there is nothing to discuss. Perhaps I’ve kept you up too late.”

“You shouldn’t have to hide what you’re truly feeling,” (Y/n) persisted, “not from me at least. I thought we were friends.”

“We are.” Shinobu’s tone was nearly clipped as she crushed the herbs a bit more vigorously.

“Then stop acting so, so fake!” (Y/n) spat, wincing almost immediately as fast has the words came out. There was probably a better way she could have said that. Before she could apologize and try again, Shinobu put the pestle on the table with a harsh clink and stalked over to where (Y/n) was sitting. Fighting to keep her tone in check, she stared (Y/n) down with that plastic smile and spoke in a low, hushed tone that filled (Y/n)’s veins with ice.

“So I’m fake, is that right? People change, (Y/n). You were gone for a month, you can’t expect everyone to wait for you, to not change or grow in your absence.”

“People change, yes,” (Y/n) swallowed tightly at the proximity, “but whatever this is Shinobu, I really don’t think it’s healthy. I can tell you’re bottling something up. Kanae—”

“Leave.”

“...what?”

“Leave,” Shinobu closes the textbook in front of (Y/n) and although she does so with care, the sound is deafening in (Y/n)’s ears, “I don’t care where you go, just get out of my lab. I’ve had my fill of this mindless chatter.”

“Are you being serious right now?” (Y/n) clenched her fists and stood from her chair, the legs slid roughly against the wood below.

“Yes, I don’t have time for immature children right now I’m afraid.” Came Shinobu’s airy reply.

“Immature— stop acting like you know better than me, we’re both kids, we’re fourteen!“ (Y/n) seethes, “I’m worried about you! I care about you! Don’t you get it?”

“Your worry is unfounded. It’s late and you are being of no help to me like this so I’ll ask you once more, leave.”

(Y/n) felt heat pricking the corners of her eyes. “I feel like I don’t know who you are anymore.” She breathed. “But fine, I’ll leave if that’s what you want.”

“At this moment in time, I couldn’t ask for anything better.” Shinobu replied, turning her back to (Y/n) to continue what she had previously been working on.

Once (Y/n) shut the door with finality and her quick footsteps became softer as she ran down the hall, Shinobu exhaled harshly, gripping the pestle tightly in her hand as she mercilessly pounded the dried herbs into dust.

“Only immature people don’t control their emotions... only immature people...”

As Shinobu repeated her mantra, (Y/n) burst into her room and looked around her. With trembling hands she changed into a fresh uniform and packed a small bag of belongings and slinging it over her shoulder. She grabbed her haori and attached her nichirin blade to her hip.

She looked around the room once more and caught her reflection in the little hand mirror on her desk, catching the bright colors of a wing that secured her hair in place. She reached back, freeing her hair from the clip and stared at it. She ran her thumb over the decorative clip before setting it on the desk. She reached for a plain hair band and tied her hair back with that instead.

(Y/n) left her room, sparing one last hurt glance at the butterfly clip before exiting the estate grounds. Before long, her crow circled overhead and (Y/n) held her arm out for the bird to take perch. The crow cawed at her expectantly, questioning her.

“If she wants me to leave, then what else is there to do?” (Y/n) shuddered in the wind. She turned away from the estate, willing herself not to turn back.

“Where will you go?” The crow asked.

“...I don’t know.”

With every step leaving the warmth of the estate farther behind, (Y/n)’s heart grew heavier in her chest.

***

“Have any of you seen (Y/n) today?” Shinobu asked the girls once they had come back in after hanging the laundry out to dry.

A chorus of negatives and head shakes met her and she sighed inwardly. “Very well then. Thank you.”

Shinobu traveled through the maze of hallways that made up her home, easily finding herself in front of (Y/n)’s door, knocking politely. With no reply, Shinobu forced herself not to roll her eyes and opened the door.

“(Y/n), if this is about last night...” Shinobu blinked at the empty room. Futon made, clean floors, not a thing out of place, but no (Y/n).

“Perhaps she’s out training.” Shinobu said to herself. She was about to close the door and head off into the gardens when a glint from the desk caught her eye and she approached. A soft gasp left her lips as she picked up the hairpin. Cradling it in her hands, Shinobu forced her breaths to remain controlled. (Y/n) had never gone a day without wearing the pin since the Kochou sisters gifted it to her.

In the safety of the empty room, Shinobu allowed herself to slump over the desk. She held the discarded hairpin close to her chest, immediately understanding what this small symbol meant. Yes, she knew what it meant, she just wished to know why. She fought against the waves, against the feeling that she was drowning again.

***

Four years was a long time, and if you asked (Y/n), the demon slayer would say that was especially true with her line of work. The demons were never the same, but the routine in between was lonely and dull. Kill a demon, settle down at an inn or in the trees for the day, move to the next village and repeat. Sometimes the stays were longer, but that was the gist of it.

(Y/n) kept to herself most of the time. There wasn’t really a point in making anything more than loose acquaintances with the constant traveling and dangers her work presented. Even on the few missions she had been paired up with other slayers in the area, she focused on the job at hand before quickly making her way to her next assignment. That started to change after she met Kamado Tanjirou and his demon sister Nezuko.

They did not get off on the right foot to say the least.

(Y/n) had been sent to the same location as the young slayer for a mission and knew something was off about him right away. Something off with that box he carried around anyway. (Y/n) opted to let him be for the time being, focusing on the mission ahead. Skip forward to the heat of battle, and (Y/n) could hardly believe her eyes when a demon burst from the boy’s box to attack another demon that had snuck around Tanjirou’s back.

(Y/n) had no time to watch and focus on this new development at the moment, she had her own demons to take care of. Her flower breathing techniques weaved through her enemies and heads went flying. Before long, the mission was completed and (Y/n) turned to the boy breathing heavily in the dirt with the demon from the box hovering over him looking at (Y/n) with curious eyes.

“You’re really skilled, (Y/n)-san!” Tanjirou praised, somehow unaware of the danger his sister was in, “You don’t even look like you’re out of breath.”

“I’ve been doing this for years. I know a lot. For instance,” (Y/n) spoke, her face stern as stone as she readied her blade, startling Tanjirou, “every demon must be destroyed.” She went in with a quick slash aimed at the demon’s neck only to pause at the last second when the foolish younger boy leapt to his feet to shield the demon from the blow.

“What are you doing?” (Y/n) asked sternly.

“Wait, she’s my sister! She’s a good demon!”

“I shouldn’t have to tell you that what you are doing is against corps rules. I can sympathize with wanting to hold onto your loved ones, but there is no such thing as a good demon. Step aside.”

“No, Nezuko has never eaten a human and she never will!” Tanjirou held his ground while his sister growled at (Y/n) from behind him.

(Y/n) rolled her eyes. “Alright then,” she said with a sarcastic sweetness, “prove it.”

“What?” Tanjirou blinked.

“Prove it, take off the muzzle. Let’s see if she has as much control as you claim she does.”

“But—“

“It shouldn’t be a problem, right? If she’s as docile as you claim what’s the issue?”

Tanjirou grit his teeth and gently pulled the muzzle to rest around his sister’s neck. (Y/n) stepped forward, her face inches away from the demon. She wasn’t worried, if the demon lunged for her she was confident she could slice its head the moment the air changed.

“Well demon?” (Y/n) sighed, surprising Tanjirou by slicing the pad of her thumb on her sharp blade, “hungry?”

To Nezuko’s credit, she hardly flinched. However, her eyes followed the path of the blood and a small trickle of drool slid past her lips. (Y/n) taunted her a bit further, waving the bloodied hand in front of her nose, still Nezuko held strong and even went as far as turning away.

“...I must say, I’m rather impressed,” (Y/n) finally spoke, stepping back from the demon and licking at her own wound, “marechi blood such as my own usually makes the demons go crazy,” she turns back to Tanjirou, “still, you must know that keeping a demon alive like this, especially as a slayer, is dangerous for both of you.”

“I know,” Tanjirou bowed his head.

“Well,” (Y/n) stretched and sighed, “as long as you know I guess it’s your own problem.”

“Huh?”

“Yeah, just don’t call me out if a Hashira finds you out. I don’t feel like dying a disgrace.” (Y/n) waved him off. “You’re going to have to work even harder and be more discreet. That’s my advice to you.” And (Y/n) was going to leave it at that and walk away, but then her crow chanted in tandem with Tanjirou’s, calling them to continue forward together. (Y/n)′s eye twiched at the grating sounds.

“It looks like we’ll still be working together for some time, (Y/n)-san!” Tanjirou smiled, catching the older girl off guard by the sincerity behind it. You’d think he’d be more put off considering (Y/n) was planning to kill his sister not five minutes ago.

“I suppose we are.”

“Say, (Y/n)-san, you’re strong. You can help me get stronger too, right?”

“Mm!”

“Hey, get her off of me!” (Y/n) momentarily panicked as the demon wrapped her arms around her waist.

“Nezuko, manners!”

(Y/n) wasn’t sure what she had done to get saddled with the strange siblings, but she could tell her job just went above her pay grade.

***

As it turns out, the Kamado siblings weren’t so bad. In fact, (Y/n) was starting to get really attached to the two. It was when Inosuke and Zenitsu were pulled into their little group, that was when (Y/n) realized she didn’t know what true pain was.

“(Y/n)-san, marry me!”

“Flower Girl, fight me!”

All damn day and night.

(Y/n) thought she’d finally have reprieve once Tanjirou had healed up at the Wisteria House, but of course the two boisterous boys were being sent with them to their next mission, Natagumo Mountain.

Zenitsu cowered at the forest edge and (Y/n) felt no remorse in leaving him behind as she sprinted ahead of Inosuke and Tanjirou, freeing the puppeted Mizunoto slayers.

Eventually they had been split off from each other to fight their own battles. (Y/n) was tired but otherwise unharmed, surprised when a small Nezuko came barreling into her.

“Nezu—?” (Y/n) gasped as the air shifted above her and she dodged the quick swipe aimed at the tiny body that clung to her. She quickly pivoted, blade in hand, and crossed swords with the assailant her eyes blowing wide at the placid face in front of her.

“Kanao?!” (Y/n) yelled out, the nostalgia and adrenaline coursing through her body was an odd, slightly terrifying combination.

Kanao tilted her head, her lips parted ever so slightly as recognition gleamed in her eyes. Despite this, Kanao did have a mission to complete and (Y/n) was keeping her from completing her orders. She continued swiping at the older girl she used to know, trying to behead the demon she could not fathom why she was protecting.

(Y/n) parried and blocked best she could, taking a defensive approach while she tried to talk Kanao down. She didn’t want to hurt Kanao, but she didn’t want Nezuko to be killed either.

Finally a saving grace, a crow swooping by with a message that saved Nezuko’s neck. (Y/n) sighed in relief as Kanao pulled back. Still looking at (Y/n) she pointed to the small demon that had wrapped herself tightly over (Y/n)’s back.

“Is this Nezuko?” She asked looking for a positive ID on the demon in question.

“Yes.” (Y/n) easily replied.

“Come with me then.” Kanao said, already corralling (Y/n) and her demon backpack in the direction of the forest edge.

(Y/n) walked alongside her a bit begrudgingly. If she made a break for it, she could have probably gotten away, but it was very likely Tanjirou and the others were already in custody. The best chance they had now was to do as they were told and hope Nezuko’s resolve would stand firm.

So (Y/n) hid Nezuko in her haori as the sun began to peak over the hills and followed Kanao to the clearing of bustling Kakushi. On the way, she began preparing her story for the trial she was sure her little team was bound to endure.

She was immediately broken from her thoughts at the ethereal sight of the Insect Pillar emerging from another point of the woods with the Water Pillar and a badly beaten Tanjirou on his back.

(Y/n)’s breath caught in her throat as those deep, dark eyes found hers at it was like time was at a stand still. At least it would have been if not for Shinobu steadily making her way towards her, her expression painfully impassive beyond the small upturn of her lips. Shinobu kept coming until she was directly in front of (Y/n).

Nezuko stirred in her sleep, clutching at (Y/n)’s back as if she could sense anxiety in the slayer’s heart. The demon was the only thing grounding her at this point as Shinobu tilted her head, an almost sinister look in her eye as she observed the small demon bundle protected by (Y/n)’s haori. All too soon, her cold eyes found their way back to (Y/n)’s and she spoke.

“I’m not going to have to tie you up, am I?”

(Y/n) closed her eyes briefly and tried to take a calming breath. With a short, almost imperceivable shake of her head, she hoarsely replied.

“No.”

“Let’s try to keep it that way then.”

Shinobu and Kanao had let (Y/n) help Nezuko into her box, but then they immediately separated the two, having a Kakushi carry the box with a wary look in her eyes. (Y/n) did her best not to look behind her where Kanao and Shinobu walked, no doubt watching her for any sign of flight.

She gulped, eyes nervously shifting to the Water Pillar walking beside her, and the Kakushi who was now carrying Tanjirou in his stead. The Water Pillar spared her an emotionless glance as he forged ahead.

“Is he going to be alright?” She asked in a hushed tone.

Enough time had passed after her question that (Y/n) had figured the man wasn’t in the mood to talk, understandably so, but (Y/n) was worried about the state Tanjirou was in. She nearly jumped out of her skin when he actually answered her minutes later.

“That will all depend on how the trial goes.”

(Y/n) felt dread pool in her stomach as they continued to march down the mountain.

***

The garden of the Master’s estate would have been lovely on any other occasion, but (Y/n) could only bring herself to stare at the pebbles below her knees and Tanjirou passed out at her side. They had taken Nezuko somewhere else in the meantime, she could only hope they would let the demon be, let her prove herself in front of them instead of killing her on principle.

(Y/n) could feel that Shinobu was standing just behind her but she dared not engage. Four years of silence between the two and a trial for treason in the highest regard had brought them together again. (Y/n) wanted to scream.

Finally Tanjirou began to stir and (Y/n) allowed herself to push away her turmoil to rouse the younger boy gently. The last thing they needed was for him to be all up in arms before the trial even officially began.

“(Y/n)-san,” Tanjirou winced, “where are we? Where is Nezuko?”

“We’re at the Demon Slayer Headquarters,” (Y/n) replied, her voice was hardly above a whisper as she felt the pressure of all the Hashira’s eyes boring into them, “I don’t know where they’re keeping Nezuko, but right now you need to focus on the trial ahead.”

“The trial?”

“For harboring a demon, Tanjirou.”

“I wouldn’t bother trying to justify it! A crime as heinous as yours only ends one way!” Rengoku Kyojirou loudly proclaimed, rallying a range of replies from his fellow pillars.

“Now that he’s finally awake to witness his punishment, let’s behead these traitors and the demon and get on with our lives.” Uzui Tengen added.

“Please,” (Y/n) forced her voice not to waiver, “allow him to explain the situation at least—“

“You’re in no position to be asking for favors, girl.” Obanai Iguro cut her off, glaring down at her from where he lounged on a tree branch. “You had best hold your tongue. A slayer at your rank should be ashamed. I’m surprised you haven’t already sliced yourself open for the embarrassment you’ve brought to the corps.”

“Iguro-san!” Kanroji gasped at the harsh words.

“Who are these people, (Y/n)-san?” Tanjirou groaned, noticing for the first time that his hands were tied tightly behind his back.

“Tanjirou, are you serious?” (Y/n)’s tone was hushed and urgent, “they’re the Hashira! You know, best of the demon slayers?”

“I don’t know, umph!” (Y/n) hastily covered his mouth, a nervous sweat gathered at her brow.

“Just try to be respectful, will you? You already broke the thin ice you’ve been traveling on, let’s try not to drown as well!”

“This isn’t right, (Y/n)-san! Where is Nezuko? Zenitsu? Inosuke? Murata?” Tanjirou spoke out, his voice heavy with emotion as he fought his way up to his knees.

“What I want to know is why we haven’t tied Tomioka or the Kinoe ranked slayer.” Obanai sneered from his tree, ignoring Tanjirou’s desperate tone. “They are both part of the boy’s schemes and should be punished as such. How are we going to teach them a lesson?”

“Oh they’ll be fine,” (Y/n) shivered hearing Shinobu speak above her from where she knelt in the pebbles, “we’ll come up with a penalty later.”

(Y/n) froze, her eyes refused to look up beyond the feet that stood before Tanjirou and herself.

“What I’m interested right now, is hearing this boy’s story.” Shinobu said. “He’s been traveling with a demon all this time, and I wish to hear why. It must be quite the tale to have Tomioka-san break ranks,” the feet take a step closer and Shinobu’s voice dropped in volume, “and you as well, (Y/n).”

(Y/n) tightened her grip over her pant leg, still refusing to look up. She could imagine an array of expressions her old friend could be wearing right now that could cut her deeper than any blade. Pity, anger, disgust, smugness, apathy, that blank smile... no, (Y/n) couldn’t bear to look up.

“So why, Kamado Tanjirou?” Shinobu asked.

“Who cares?” Uzui scoffed from a few yards away, yet he waited for the boy to explain himself.

“She’s my—“ he broke into a fit of coughs and (Y/n) tried to soothe his back, telling him to breathe.

Shinobu stooped down, a gourd of water in hand, offering the water to Tanjirou and finally catching (Y/n)’s eyes as the boy drank the medicated water. When Shinobu’s eyes returned to Tanjirou, (Y/n) remembered how to breathe.

“She’s my little sister!” Tanjirou proclaimed. “She’s never hurt anyone and she never will!”

A few of the Hashira began casting their doubt, but Tanjirou powered through.

“I became a slayer to find a cure for her! In two whole years since she became a demon, she’s never eaten a single person! Let her continue to fight by my side!”

“Well, well, looks like the fun’s already starting.”

(Y/n) turned her head and her breathing hitched. Of course the Wind Pillar of all people would get his hands on Nezuko’s box.

“Is this the boy who has been traveling with a demon? Just what the hell do you think you’re doing?” Shinazugawa asked with a sinister grin.

“Please put down the box Shinazugawa-sama!” The Kakushi (Y/n) recalled to have prior possession of the box pleaded.

“Shinazugawa, please do not act out of line.” Shinobu warned.

“Nah, run that by me again, kid?” Sanemi jeered, holding the box precariously in one hand, “fighting alongside a demon? Impossible, you idiot!”

Tanjirou and (Y/n) called out in horror as the Hashira rammed his blade clean through the box, skewering Nezuko.

Tanjirou scrambled to his feet and lunged at Sanemi, (Y/n) was about to get to her feet as well, but Shinobu held her firmly in place, clutching (Y/n)’s arm tightly while shooting her a warning glance.

(Y/n) could only watch, mouth agape, as Tanjirou head butted Shinazugawa to the ground.

Mitsuri attempted to stifle a snort, covering her face in her hands.

“If you can’t tell the difference between good demons and bad ones, then you don’t deserve to be a Hashira!” Tanjirou yelled.

“We’re doomed.” (Y/n) whispered weakly. She felt as if all her blood was sinking to her knees, sinking as fast as their chance of forgiveness down the drain.

Before Sanemi could retaliate, a couple of Oyakata-sama’s children announced the Master’s arrival. (Y/n) was quick to follow Shinobu in a bow, wincing when she heard what could only be Sanemi pounding Tanjirou into the rocks, forcing him to bow.

“Hello everyone,” Oyakata-sama addressed the garden, his voice carried in the warm breeze, “how good it feels to have you all here.”

Sanemi greeted the Master, formally asking for an explanation. If not for the seriousness of the moment, (Y/n) would have rolled her eyes.

“The Kamado siblings have been sanctioned, you see. I request you all respect that.” Oyakata stated simply.

An array of mostly negative objections arose at this ending with Sanemi calling for punishments for Tanjirou, (Y/n), and Giyuu.

The Master stood silently for a moment before asking one of his children to read a letter aloud. A letter from a previous Hashira, detailing Nezuko’s history. The letter also revealing that should Nezuko fail; Urokodaki, Tanjirou, and Giyuu would atone through seppuku.

A few of the Hashira were still willing to speak against such a plan, swearing that it was not a risk worth taking. Once there was a lull in their heated remarks, Ubuyashiki saw fit to address (Y/n).

“(Y/n), my child.”

(Y/n)’s head jutted up at the sudden call of attention to her presence. “Ye— yes, Master?”

“Why do you think that of the squad that has been built around you, only you are here?” Oyakata-sama asked with an warm smile.

“I would suppose it would be because I should know better than a ragtag group of Mizunoto, Master.” came (Y/n)’s subdued reply.

“I would hope so.” The Master chuckled, causing heat to bloom across (Y/n)’s cheeks. “Why didn’t you kill the demon?”

“I was going to, but she proved herself to me,” (Y/n) began speaking more evenly as she recalled the moment, “I presented her with my blood, my rare blood, and she turned away. I have traveled with the Kamado siblings for weeks and not once had Nezuko hurt anyone. She protects people, she sleeps to replenish energy. Based on everything I have observed, I believe in Nezuko. I believe in Tanjirou.”

“Would you stake your life on this along with the others listed here today?” Oyakata-sama asked.

(Y/n) breathed in, firmly nodding her head. Her eyes meeting Ubuyashiki’s milky blank one’s despite his lack of vision.

“Yes, I would.”

Shinobu’s hold on (Y/n)’s bicep curled. (Y/n) hadn’t realized she had still been holding her down.

“And here we have three, now four, people willing to take responsibility for this demon. What say you, my children?” The Master asked the Hashira warmly.

“Forgive me Master, but this is not a matter of numbers!” Sanemi yelled, “Demons are sick creatures that need to be put down and I’ll prove it to you now!”

Sanemi sliced his arm, much more blood than (Y/n) had conjured with the small cut to her thumb that she had presented to Nezuko. She and Tanjirou watched as the blood dripped to the box, staining the lacquered wood.

“No good doing this in the light.” Obanai said, “it won’t come out unless it’s dark.”

Sanemi dashed to the shaded engawa, enticing Nezuko to come out with another stab at the box.

“No!” Tanjirou yelled, he made to scramble to the engawa, but was quickly subdued by Obanai.

“Stop!” (Y/n) echoed Tanjirou’s sentiments, pulling against Shinobu’s hold. “Why are you being so needlessly cruel?”

Sanemi ignored them, a wicked grin on his face as he watched Nezuko emerge from the box, growling lowly.

“Well then, demon?” He sneered, holding out his arm.

(Y/n) could tell Nezuko was straining against the pull of the marechi blood. With all of the injuries she had sustained working against her as well, it couldn’t be easy for the demon to hold back.

“Nezuko!” Tanjirou wheezed as Obanai was pincering his lung painfully with his elbow.

“Kamado-kun,” Shinobu addressed, “don’t struggle too much while in that hold, your lung might burst.”

Tanjirou only struggled harder, surprising everyone when he broke through his rope restraints and stumbled towards the engawa. Tomioka stopped Obanai from pinning him again.

“Nezuko!” Tanjirou called again.

His voice seemed to finally break through to Nezuko and after a few tense moments, she turned away from Sanemi in disgust.

(Y/n) couldn’t help the relieved smile that overtook her lips.

Once the scene was relayed to the Master, he seemed pleased with the report. He told Tanjirou that although Nezuko had done well to prove herself, they would need to grow even stronger before they could be fully accepted by the others. With that wisdom, he said they were free to go.

(Y/n) startled as Shinobu finally let her go, raising her arm to speak. “If all is well then Oyakata-sama, allow me to provide lodging for them.”

Both (Y/n) and Tanjirou seemed a bit wary of this sudden hospitality, (Y/n) even more so, but if Shinobu noticed or cared she didn’t show it, signaling the Kakushi who had been standing by to gather the injured boy and the demon.

The Kakushi tasked with carrying Nezuko seemed a bit frightened of the little demon kneeling in her box, so naturally (Y/n) rose to carry her instead.

“I’ve got her.” She smiled kindly and reached for the box and secured it shut, but not before giving the demon girl a few well earned head pats that rose Nezuko’s mood greatly.

Another Kakushi picked up Tanjirou then (Y/n) and the two Kakushi quickly made their retreat. That is, until Tanjirou bursted back into the garden asking to headbutt Sanemi.

“Please excuse us!” (Y/n) and the two Kakushi bowed deeply once they got him back under control and sped off twice as fast. (Y/n) and the Kakushi running beside her berated Tanjirou from where he sat on the other Kakushi’s back for such a disrespectful display after being allowed the impossible.

When they reached the Butterfly Estate, (Y/n)’s heart squeezed in her chest. The grounds looked to be near the same as the night she had left. No one was there to greet them at the door, so they went around the gardens and found Kanao standing amongst the butterflies.

“Hi, Kanao.” (Y/n) greeted the younger girl bashfully. Now that they weren’t battling over keeping Nezuko’s head, (Y/n) finally took in how much she had grown in four years.

Kanao stayed silent, a serene smile on her lips as she merely observed the group that had approached her.

“What are you all here for?” A sharp voice called from behind them, causing the Kakushi to jump and spin to quickly explain they were here to put Tanjirou in the infirmary.

“Well then come with me...” Aoi’s words trailed off a bit once her eyes found (Y/n)’s face.

“Hi Aoi,” (Y/n) gave a nervous half wave, “you’ve gotten a bit taller.”

Aoi marched straight up to (Y/n) and berated her with a barrage of small fists pounding painlessly against her chest. “What would you expect after being gone so long!” She sniffed, “Four years without a single letter or visit? We thought you were dead, idiot!”

“(Y/n)-san? Do you know these people?” Tanjirou asked from Gotou’s back.

“Yeah, I uh, sorta used to live here.” (Y/n) replied, allowing Aoi to continue hitting her to her heart’s content.

“‘Sorta used to live here’, you’re family! You have always had a place here! Now come on, I’m sure Kiyo, Sumi, and Naho will have a bone to pick with you as well. And Shinobu-sama!” Aoi’s fist struck especially hard at the thought, “Shinobu-sama is going to have some choice words for you when she gets back I just know it!”

Aoi led them all inside, occasionally throwing a few more jabs into (Y/n)’s side to make sure she was really there. She didn’t admit that was what they were for of course, she played it off more as a punishment for disappearing for so long.

There was screaming coming from the infirmary and (Y/n) would have been worried if she hadn’t recognized the sound almost immediately.

“Zenitsu!” Tanjirou called excitedly.

While Tanjirou and poor Gotou were dealing with the sobbing, snotty boy, Aoi had dragged (Y/n) over to Kiyo who had been tending to Zenitsu only moments before.

“Look who finally decided to come home.” Aoi told the younger girl who looked up, tilting her head. (Y/n) almost thought Kiyo hadn’t recognized her. Being as young as she was, she wouldn’t have blamed her, but then she burst forward and hugged (Y/n) tightly around her waist.

“What’s going on in here? Hm, Aoi-san, Kiyo?”

Naho and Sumi had made their way into the infirmary with a basket of fresh linens and paused at the entryway for a moment before they realized who their friend was hugging and ran over to join her with tears in their eyes.

“(Y/n)-san, where have you been all this time?” Naho whimpered.

“Why didn’t you say anything before you left?” Sumi cried.

“I’m sorry,” (Y/n) knelt down to better hug them all, “I know it’s not enough to make up for anything, but I’m sorry for leaving like that. It wasn’t fair,” she looked up to meet Aoi’s stern blue eyes, “to any of you.”

“Well, make it up to us by sticking around from now on.” Aoi said, crossing her arms. “No more running away.”

“But...” (Y/n) was conflicted. Had Shinobu not told the girls why she had left? (Y/n) mustered up the best smile she could and nodded feebly. “All right.”

“(Y/n)-san, your box is... humming?” Sumi pointed at the wooden box.

“Oh, um, you see... in this box is my friend, Nezuko,” (Y/n) treaded carefully, not wishing to startle the girls too badly if she could help it.

“You have someone in a box?” Aoi barked, “well let them out for goodness sake!”

“It’s a little bright in here...” (Y/n) shifted her vision to where Tanjirou and Zenitsu were talking, catching sight of Inosuke as well. Poor boar boy looked like he’d seen better days. “And I’m not sure that Shinobu-” should she still speak of her so informally? “-would be pleased if I let her out without her blessing.”

“Why wouldn’t Shinobu-sama allow you to let someone out of a box?” Aoi rolled her eyes.

“It’s complicated. I’m sure she’ll want to talk to you all about it once she comes back. Until then, Nezuko will be fine in here.”

The girls, though incredulous, let the subject drop for now. Although, they couldn’t help but eye the box with suspicion. Once Tanjirou was settled in the infirmary, the butterfly girls dragged (Y/n) away to talk about the goings on of the last four years which soon devolved into hounding (Y/n) for her own stories to share, even Kanao had come by to sit and listen.

“...And that’s how I helped the fishing village take care of the demon that was lurking in the sea.”

“Tell us another one, (Y/n)-san!” The youngest girls pleaded, kicking their feet in the air behind them. They had migrated to lay flat on their stomachs as the stories progressed and watched (Y/n) recount her adventures with their heads propped up on their arms with rapt attention.

“I’m afraid that will have to wait for another time, it’s quite late you know.”

Everyone turned to the door to find Shinobu staring down at them. The youngest girls pouted a bit, trying to get a bit more time to stick around, but Shinobu held firm and directed them to their rooms.

“You’ll still be here tomorrow, right? (Y/n)-san?” Sumi asked from the doorway.

“I...” (Y/n) pulled at the sleeve of her uniform and subtly pursed her lips while trying to figure out how to proceed, to her surprise, Shinobu spoke up on her behalf.

“I promise you’ll see her in the morning. Now of to bed. (Y/n) and I have much to discuss.”

The thought of having a prolonged conversation with Shinobu sent shivers through (Y/n)’s spine. Once all the girls were well out of sight, Shinobu redirected her attention to (Y/n).

“Let’s drop off your cargo first,” Shinobu said, motioning to the box sitting beside (Y/n), “I’ve arranged a room and Kamado-kun has been wondering where his... sister, has been.”

“Of course.” (Y/n) stood, shouldering the box.

Apparently the room was rather far. (Y/n) felt as if the silence between them was slowly eating at her until she finally decided to speak. For better or for worse.

“You’ve taken all of this extraordinarily well,” (Y/n) commented, testing the waters.

“Mm, I’d like to hold off on any conversation until we drop off the demon. Use this time to gather any thoughts, if you have them that is.”

(Y/n)’s brow furrowed slightly, eyes narrowed. She was sure that was some kind of dig at her intelligence, but she held her tongue.

They dropped off Nezuko, (Y/n) and Tanjirou bid each other good night, and then (Y/n) was led to an all too familiar space, the lab.

Shinobu motioned for (Y/n) to sit at one of the less cluttered tables while she closed the door firmly behind them. (Y/n) would have been lying if she said she wasn’t even just a tad bit concerned by the setting of this ‘talk’ that was about to unfold. Finally, Shinobu took the stool across from her on the other side of the table. She laced her fingers together, using them to prop up her chin as her endlessly amethyst eyes bore into (Y/n)’s. That ghostly smile seemingly perfected after four years of separation, had (Y/n)’s hands clench into fists under the table.

“So,” Shinobu began, her voice deceptively sweet, “when exactly do you think it was when you completely lost your mind?”

“Excuse me?” (Y/n)’s eye twitched.

“Defending a demon, offering up your own life for a demon to live... how insanely idiotic. I thought you were smarter than that. I suppose it had been.. four years, was it? Four years since you ran off. And I thought that was the most careless thing you could ever do. You really have outdone yourself!”

“Stop,” (Y/n) had heard enough of these little jabs and she new well enough Shinobu could go all day as long as she hadn’t changed too drastically in their time apart. However, Shinobu powered through.

“Everyone was devastated when you left you know. We were a family and you just up and left in the middle of the night without a word so soon after—“ After Kanae, “Now you’re putting everything on the line for some demon? You’re a coward. A selfish coward.”

(Y/n) was really angry now. She stood up so fast her stool clattered to the ground behind her. She slammed her hands against the table and stared furiously into Shinobu’s placid expression, though she could detect a hint of a heated spark in those deep purple eyes.

“Don’t act like you’re so innocent in all of this! You told me to leave! You want to judge me for trusting Nezuko with my life, fine! But I only did what you commanded of me when I left. You don’t get to say I just fucked off because you think I didn’t care enough!”

Shinobu had the nerve to chuckle, though no trace of humor was there, as she slowly rose to her own feet and assumed a similar stance over the table as (Y/n).

“Did you really think when I said that, when I told you to leave the lab, I meant I wanted you to walk out of my life?” Shinobu asked seriously.

“I didn’t know what you wanted! You weren’t the same person anymore! Don’t try telling me that it wasn’t what you wanted either, you never came looking for me. You never sent your crow. Tell me you weren’t ecstatic when you woke up that morning and didn’t have to deal with me anymore!”

Shinobu slapped her own hand against the table, a vein pulsed painfully under the skin of her forehead. She opened her mouth to retort, poisoned words ready to lash out with a flick of her tongue, but as luck would have it, a Kakushi nervously called from the other side of the door.

“Kochou-sama, the treatments for the, uh, despiderfication of the slayers from Natagumo Mountain are ready to be carried out with your supervision.”

Shinobu closed her eyes, breathing in deeply before opening them again and looking significantly more drained.

“I see. Please inform the others that I’ll be there in a few moments.”

“Right away, Kochou-sama.”

As the footsteps pattered away, (Y/n) fixed her stool upright before heading in the direction of the door, assuming she and Shinobu were done talking, or screaming rather. (Y/n) was surprised to feel Shinobu grasp her hand as she tried to pass by.

“You remember where your room is, right?” Shinobu asked, the undertones of her voice still taut with anger.

(Y/n) too tired to fight on, responded simply with a mute nod.

“I had the Kakushi clean it earlier today. Everything should still be as you left it.”

Shinobu let go of (Y/n)’s hand and it immediately felt cold. The Hashira opened the lab door and stepped out into the hallway, her back to (Y/n) as she made her last parting statement.

“If you know what is good for you, you won’t step a foot outside of estate grounds without speaking to me first.”

“And if I don’t?” (Y/n) asked just to be obstinate.

“Then I guess I’ll have to hunt you down for sport.” Shinobu quickly replied, turning to face (Y/n) just to show her how serious she was.

(Y/n) couldn’t help the weak guffaw that left her lips. To hear such a threat delivered by such a soothing tone was practically oxymoronic.

Shinobu lingered for a moment longer before gliding off to see to her patients while (Y/n) turned down the opposite end of the hallway and traveled down a few more to find herself standing outside of her old room. She opened the door, the space was clean as Shinobu promised. She closed the door softly behind her, blocking off the light from the hall. There would be time to be sentimental in the morning. Right now, between the Mountain, the trial and the emotional battle with the Insect Hashira herself, (Y/n) was exhausted. She scooted her way into the freshly made futon and fell asleep with the nostalgic smell of wisteria petals drifting through her airways.

***

(Y/n) awoke around mid-morning to the sun shining through her window. She stretched and got dressed, her fingers pausing over the last few buttons of her uniform as she glanced over the desk.

The butterfly hair clip she had once worn with pride sat in front of her. It appeared to be left untouched by time. Not even a speck of dust adorned the colorful wings. She reached out to it, but her fingers curled just before she touched it. She pulled her hand back as a knock sounded on the door.

“Yes?”

“It’s Aoi.” A voice called from the other side.

(Y/n) quickly took the last few steps needed to reach the door and slid it open to greet Aoi but before she could, the stern girl stepped inside and pulled the door shut again.

“Were you and Shinobu-sama fighting last night?” She asked hurriedly.

“Where did you hear that?” (Y/n) answered the question with one of her own.

“The Kakushi are partial to gossip. Now what did you do!” Aoi huffed, jabbing (Y/n)’s shoulder.

“Why does it have to be me? Shinobu was the one who started it!” (Y/n) backed up, rubbing her shoulder.

“You two better make up soon. It will hurt Naho, Sumi and Kiyo if they find out you’re still mad at each other,” Aoi crossed her arms over her chest.

“It’s not that easy, Aoi. It’s been four years. It’s not all going to go away overnight.”

“Do I have to do everything around here?” Aoi grumbled to herself, passing a hand over her face. “I’ll help you, but you better try to be civil.”

“Aoi, I don’t need help. I’m sorry that fight got back to you. If Shinobu and I talk again, I promise I’ll try harder to keep my temper in check, okay?”

Aoi sighed and shook her head, “Fine. That wasn’t what I had come to talk to you about anyway.”

“Oh,” (Y/n) tilted her head, “then what is it?”

“Your friends,” Aoi pinched the bridge of her nose, “they’re driving me crazy. I need you to get the blonde and the boar to participate in recovery training.”

“I’ll see what I can do.” (Y/n) answered with slight reluctance. She knew just how difficult those two could be.

Aoi and (Y/n) arrived at the room that was being used for the boys’ recovery training. Tanjirou was already working hard, trying to catch Kanao in a game of tag, while Zenitsu and Inosuke watched from the corner with bitter disinterest.

“Hey,” (Y/n) addressed the younger teens, “what’s the problem? Don’t you guys want to get better? Stronger?”

“It’s pointless.” Inosuke weakly answered.

“(Y/n)-san, this training is too difficult!” Zenitsu cried.

(Y/n) dodged the weepy blonde’s attempts at hugging her and bonked him on the head with the side of her fist.

“I feel no sympathy for you. Aoi and the others are working really hard to get you back in fighting shape, the least you could do is put a little bit of effort in!” (Y/n) crossed her arms, “before you know it, Tanjirou will leave you both in the dust. Do you really want that?”

Zenitsu and Inosuke grunted, still refusing to budge. (Y/n) motioned for Naho to hand her a cup of medicated water and promptly splashed its contents all over the boys.

“What was that for?” Zenitsu screeched.

“Want revenge? Come take me on.” (Y/n) motioned to the table of cups.

Naho, Sumi and Kiyo made small sounds of excitement, trying to encourage the boys, but they just grumbled and walked back to the infirmary.

“You guys are going to regret walking away!” (Y/n) called after them. “Let me know when you are done moping and want to get back to work!”

“Oh my.” Shinobu giggled as she walked in, watching Zenitsu and Inosuke sulk past her.

Shinobu turned to observe the room, pausing at (Y/n). Her eyes flickered down at (Y/n)’s chest and stayed there long enough for the other slayer to notice.

“What?” (Y/n) had grumbled mostly to herself as she followed Shinobu’s gaze downward. Heat shot to her face immediately as she realized she had forgotten to finish buttoning her uniform after Aoi distracted her. It wasn’t showing a lot, just her collar bones and a bit of her chest, but it was still jarring. With a strangled chirp, she quickly buttoned her uniform the rest of the way.

“Oh please, no need to cover up on my account.” Shinobu easily teased, though she felt a bit embarrassed to have been caught staring. She wasn’t entirely sure why her vision gravitated there to begin with.

After a few false starts, (Y/n) finally choked out, “what do you want?”

“I need Kanao and Aoi to help me gather more herbs for spider demon antidotes, not that it’s any of your business.”

“Kochou-sama,” Aoi interjected before (Y/n) could retaliate, “Kanao and I are helping Tanjirou complete his recovery training for the day. I’ve asked (Y/n)-san to fill in for us and she has readily agreed to take our place.”

(Y/n) gave Aoi a look, prompting the younger girl to pinch at (Y/n)’s side discreetly. A message to keep her mouth shut. Kanao simply blinked, twisting on the ball of her foot to dodge another one of Tanjirou’s lunges.

“Very well then, keep up (Y/n). I hope you still remember a thing or two about plants in that thick skull of yours,” Shinobu glided past (Y/n) to step out onto the engawa, “though I wouldn’t be too surprised if all of that knowledge fell out of your head along with your common sense.”

(Y/n) opened her mouth before shutting it firmly closed. Remembering that the younger girls were there and what Aoi had asked of her, she pursed her lips and silently fell into step beside the Hashira, walking with her to the nearby forest where the herbs they needed flourished.

“You recall what Aralia Cordata looks like, correct?” Shinobu asked once they were well within the trees.

“Yeah, kind of hard to miss that shrub if you know what you’re looking for.” (Y/n) groused.

“Fine, fine. Don’t come crying to me if you touch something poisonous.”

“I won’t. Won’t touch anything poisonous I mean. Because I know what I’m doing.”

“Are you telling me that or are you just trying to reassure yourself?”

(Y/n) chose not to reply, instead she split off from Shinobu to one of the shrubs in question and began harvesting a few leafy tendrils from it. Before long, her basket was filled and she turned just in time to see Shinobu turn back to her own bush, pretending to examine one of the tendrils she had cut.

“You know,” (Y/n) sighed as she stood back to her full height, “Aoi only made me come here in her stead because that fight we had last night got back to her. She expects us to make up.”

“Mm, I figured it was something like that,” Shinobu hummed, “I do believe that for once, she is too optimistic in that regard.”

“Well, you never did like admitting when you were wrong,” (Y/n) shrugged, “or saying you’re sorry. It’s comforting to know you haven’t completely destroyed your old personality.”

“And what exactly have I been wrong about, (Y/n)?” Shinobu’s forehead pulsed, “what exactly have I done that requires an apology?”

“You lie to everyone Shinobu. You hide behind plastic smiles pretending to be someone you’re not to fill a void. Saying your fine and shrugging everyone off while holding them at arm's length. When I tried to talk to you, you pushed me away and told me to leave. You were dismissive, cold.”

(Y/n) wrapped her arms around herself as if a chilling wind overcame her. Continuing on, she spoke lowly before Shinobu could speak her denial.

“Not to say that I don’t have my own fault in all of this. Even if I thought you really wanted me gone that night, I should have fought harder for you. I knew you were hurting, but I gave up and left anyway. That is something I’ve thought about a lot in our time apart and I regret it every day because you were worth fighting for.”

(Y/n) blew out a harsh breath of air, running a hand over her scalp she made her closing statement.

“If there was one thing you were right about last night, it’s that I’m a coward and I’m sorry that I didn’t try harder.”

(Y/n) chanced a look at Shinobu’s face. The Hashira’s eyes rounded and her mouth was ever so slightly agape. The silence hung in the air until a sweet wisteria breeze swept through the trees and (Y/n) cleared her throat and looked away.

“So if we could at least pretend to get along for the sake of the girls, I think Aoi would appreciate it.” (Y/n) added before reaching down to collect her basket. A sudden noise, like air being rapidly released through one’s nose, came from behind (Y/n) and she paused in her movements to glance back at Shinobu who was looking down at the leaf she was worrying between her fingers.

“I... apologize, for pushing you away in such a way that made you think you had to exile yourself. It was also cruel of me to say you didn’t care about us when I knew that you thought of this place as your home. I was trying to hurt you back and that was wrong of me. I’m sorry.” Shinobu solemnly said.

Now it was (Y/n)’s turn to stare. Soon, Shinobu leveled a cocky smile and stood with her basket of leaves and a few other miscellaneous plants she gathered.

“Looks like you were wrong about my ability to apologize, hm?” She said.

“Shut up. Don’t ruin the moment.” (Y/n) smiled, reaching for her own basket.

The atmosphere surrounding the girls leaving the forest felt a lot more relaxed than it had upon entering.

***

Days turned into weeks and everything seemed so much better after. It was still awkward at times, but (Y/n) and Shinobu were finding their rhythm again. There was still a little hostility at times, but rather than avoid each other, they talked it out. It was almost frightening how in sync they were when they were working well together.

(Y/n) split her time between helping Shinobu with the slayers turned spiders and helping the younger girls train Tanjirou. She was elated by the boy’s progress as he finally managed to catch Kanao. She had noticed Zenitsu and Inosuke lurking nearby and gestured to the room. Now that they knew recovery training was possible and Tanjirou was leaving them in the dust, the rambunctious boys finally felt the need to catch up with their comrade’s progress.

Before long, the boys were well enough to continue the training on their own and (Y/n) found herself spending more and more time with Shinobu. They would spend hours talking or saying nothing at all, just enjoying each other’s company while they worked away on medicines and poisons.

It didn’t take long for (Y/n) to notice the difference. How Shinobu took up more than her fair share of space in (Y/n)’s thoughts. Even just catching sight of her across the garden was starting to make (Y/n)’s heart leap. On the occasion Shinobu would spot her she’d smile and wave, making (Y/n)’s heart stop all together before kicking into overdrive. The lingering touches and whispered words Shinobu would share with her as they worked in the lab certainly didn’t help either. Just when (Y/n) had thought they finally found their dynamic... Why was it changing again already?

(Y/n) was telling Naho, Sumi and Kiyo the story of how she met Tanjirou and Nezuko while she patted the demon’s head. Ever since Nezuko had woken up, the younger girls, though skittish at first, had grown to be fascinated and even enamored with her. As (Y/n) retold the tale, Nezuko humming happily at her side, Shinobu happened upon the group.

“I’m afraid we’ll have to cut this session short. Tanjirou and the others are ready to get back out on the road now. Something about joining Rengoku-san on his next mission.”

“How did I not here about this plan sooner?” (Y/n) frowned.

“That’s a question best suited for Tanjirou to answer I suppose.” Shinobu replied rather emotionlessly, concerning (Y/n).

So while everyone else was getting ready to leave, (Y/n) pulled Tanjirou aside and asked him what was going on.

“I didn’t tell you we were leaving because I hope you’ll stay and continue to rebuild the relationships you have here, (Y/n)-san. I appreciate everything you’ve done for Nezuko and I, and now I hope to return the favor.” Tanjirou smiled brightly.

“And how do you figure you’re doing that?” (Y/n) crossed her arms.

“Because the longer you get to stay here, the more time you get to spend with Shinobu-san! I can smell that you two want to be together more now than ever.”

“You and your nose I swear,” heat radiated off of (Y/n)’s cheeks, “I think you have intuition and that sense mixed up.”

Tanjirou merely laughed in response.

“So, you guys think you’ll really be okay without me? You’ll stay out of trouble?”

“Don’t worry, (Y/n)-san! We’ll see each other again soon!” Tanjirou beamed.

(Y/n) smiled in return and they rejoined the send off.

“Where did Shinobu-san go?” Tanjirou wondered.

(Y/n) looked around and sure enough, the Pillar was nowhere to be seen.

“She must have had something urgent to attend to,” she answered, making a note to search for her later.

(Y/n) stood out in the garden until the loud group disappeared into the trees and their shouts could no longer be heard over the rustling of the leaves. She took a moment to stare out into the clear blue sky before returning inside.

(Y/n) was going to go look for Shinobu, but she wanted to go to her room to change her uniform first since Zenitsu had snotted all over it in his tearful goodbye.

She opened the door and was surprised to find Shinobu already inside. Shinobu’s back was turned to her as she quickly ran a sleeve over her face. She cleared her throat before facing back with a weak smile.

“(Y/n), forget something?”

“Huh?” (Y/n) blinked, still trying to process why Shinobu might have just been tearing up in her room of all places.

“The others must be ready to leave now. You better pick up what you needed so they don't have to wait too long.”

“They already left, Shinobu.” (Y/n) explained. “I hadn’t planned on going with them.”

“Oh.” Shinobu turned to look outside the window of (Y/n)’s room, hoping the blood that buzzed in her cheeks hadn’t burned its way to her ears as well.

“Shinobu, is something wrong?” (Y/n) tested.

“I just feel a bit silly now I suppose.” Shinobu admitted, bringing a slight smile to (Y/n)’s face with her honesty. “I thought you were gone again.”

“Well, I wouldn’t leave without a proper goodbye, not again.” (Y/n) came up beside Shinobu, intending to give her hand a comforting squeeze when she felt something other than skin instead. Looking down she saw her old butterfly clip in Shinobu’s hand, a quick look at the empty spot at her desk confirmed it.

Shinobu noticed that (Y/n) had noticed and rose the hairclip up between them with a subdued exhale.

“You know, every morning I wonder if it will be the morning you feel comfortable enough to wear this again.” Shinobu said, twirling the insect in her fingers. “When I thought you were gone and I saw this still sitting on your desk, it brought me back to places I’d rather not think about.”

“I’m sorry,” (Y/n) rested her hand over the back of Shinobu’s haori, “I just haven’t felt... I don’t know, worthy of it? I didn’t intend to make you feel bad.”

A small puff of air left Shinobu’s nose at the words. “It isn’t a matter of worth, it’s about whether or not you feel like you belong here again. Whether or not you’re comfortable here.”

“Agree to disagree.” (Y/n) joked. “But if it makes you feel better, I’m glad I get to spend more time here. I’ve been happier in these last few weeks than in the last few years.”

“I’m glad.” Shinobu watched a couple of butterflies flutter against the window before turning back to the garden. “And if you insist on it being a matter of worth, you are more than worthy. It’s not even a question to me.”

“Thank you.” (Y/n) simpered. Her breathing hitched slightly when Shinobu reached up to run her fingers through a loose lock of (Y/n)’s hair.

“Would you let me do your hair?” Shinobu asked softly.

“I’d like that.” (Y/n) whispered.

Shinobu guided (Y/n) back to the desk and sat her down on the chair. She freed (Y/n)’s hair from its plain hair band and quietly ran a brush through her locks with such softness that (Y/n) felt like she might fall asleep. Shinobu gathered the hair in her hands and styled it as she wished, clipping it together with the butterfly hair clip. Shinobu checked over her work, her hands resting on (Y/n)’s shoulders.

“You look perfect.” (Y/n) shivered. She hadn’t expected Shinobu’s lips to be so close to her ear. Neither had she expected the lips to ghost over her cheek in a light kiss.

“I just remembered I have a meeting I need to attend. You’ll help the girls with the infirmary won’t you?”

(Y/n) had almost forgotten how to speak but managed to pull it together. “Of course! I’ll, um, see you when you get back?”

“Perhaps,” Shinobu removed her hands from (Y/n)’s shoulders, “I won’t be back until late though.”

“Okay.”

A shy hug (in slightly awkward positioning due to the gross state of the Kinoe’s uniform, courtesy of Zenitsu) and Shinobu parted ways with (Y/n). (Y/n) met up with the girls in the infirmary and was almost immediately met with a chorus of cheers from Naho, Kiyo and Sumi when they noticed her hair. Aoi and Kanao smiled at the sight as well. A full day of caring for the infirmary made (Y/n) excited to finally get into bed for the night.

She awoke with a scream caught in her throat. Old demons had visited her in her sleep. As she worked to calm her heart, she noticed the light of the full moon streaming through her window. With a few more deep breaths she sat up from her futon and wrapped her haori around her shoulders.

Quietly exiting her room, she padded through the halls until she found her way to the kitchen, a smile pulled at her lips when she found Shinobu already there boiling water.

“Rough night?” Shinobu asked. She was also in her bed wear, her hair hanging loose from its usual style.

“Yes,” (Y/n) moved to stand beside her, “it’s been awhile since the last one I had.”

“How did you deal with that when you were on the road?”

“I would buy little sacks of tea leaves as I went. On bad nights or whenever sleep eluded me I’d boil up some water and try a new blend. Yours was always the best though.”

“I was already going to make you a cup, no need for flattery.”

“No flattery here. Just the truth.” (Y/n) swore, making Shinobu’s smile just a tad fuller.

Shinobu finished preparing the cups and as (Y/n) took hers about ready to leave, the Hashira asked her to wait.

“It’s a full moon tonight. Want to watch the stars for a moment?” Shinobu asked.

“I’d love to.” (Y/n) nodded.

The pair walked outside along the engawa until they had a pleasant view of the full brightness of the moon. They sat along the engawa’s edge, letting their legs dangle as they sipped their tea in the drowning noise of cicada and cricket songs.

(Y/n) chanced a glance at Shinobu in her periphery and marveled at how the moonlight highlighted her skin to the point where she almost appeared to be glowing. The way it reflected off of her eyes was absolutely enchanting. (Y/n) forced her attention back on the sky. Though beautiful it seemed to pale in comparison to the girl next to her.

As her eyes traced over the larger craters of the moon, she thought back on an old saying she had read at one of the inns she had frequented. An old, battered collection of pages that she read through when sleep didn’t come. She had read that particular work quite a few times.

She wondered if perhaps Shinobu had read it too. Though more likely the girl had her face buried in medical texts than anything else. (Y/n) then wondered, if perhaps she could get away with saying it. A confession without consequence, but on the off change that Shinobu was knowledgeable on the old text it could damage the progress they had made in healing their relationship. Perhaps it would be better to just enjoy the moment. (Y/n) took another sip of tea.

“The moon is beautiful, isn’t it?”

(Y/n) nearly choked on her tea, spluttering and coughing as she tried in vein to stop herself. Finally she managed to calm down only to notice how intently Shinobu was staring at her.

Had she meant that literally? Shinobu was looking at (Y/n) so expectantly, but it could easily just be because she had nearly blacked out from inhaling her tea!

“...It is.” (Y/n) finally answered hiding her face in her cup, looking at neither Shinobu nor the moon.

Another long silence filled by the chirps of insects enjoying the humid night air. (Y/n) had finished her tea and set her cup to her right, her free hand that had been resting between Shinobu and herself was soon covered by a cool and calloused touch.

(Y/n) shyly turned her head to meet the Pillar’s gaze and jumped a bit when her nose unexpectedly brushed against Shinobu’s.

“The moon is beautiful tonight, isn’t it?” Shinobu repeated barely above a whisper. She was not pulling away.

(Y/n) felt her throat dry and she wished she had just one more swallow of tea left. With a slight quiver in her lips, she responded. Doing her best to stay focused on the purple irises before her.

“Yes,” she answered with a slight nod, careful not to bump head with Shinobu, “it is.”

“(Y/n)?” Shinobu called to her, cupping her face gently with the hand that wasn’t already resting on top of (Y/n)’s.

“Y.. yes?”

“Would you kiss me if I asked?” Shinobu murmured, filling (Y/n)’s senses with a dizzying wisteria scent. The slayer didn’t even try to talk herself out of answering such a query as the thumb of Shinobu’s hand swiped the corner of her lips.

“Yes.” She replied, nearly breathless already and her pupils blown wide.

“(Y/n), please kiss me.”

It was all too easy to lean in when they were already sitting so closely. The hand Shinobu had been using to cup her cheek weaved through the hair at the back of (Y/n)’s head, pulling her closer yet as their lips met a bit clumsily in buzzing, mind numbing bliss. (Y/n)’s free hand, the one not currently being clutched in a near death grip over the wooden floor, found home at the back of Shinobu’s neck, lightly massaging the skin there.

They broke apart a few times but the breaths they took were quick and few. Eventually they rested against each other while their abused lungs burned with a hunger for oxygen.

“I have wanted to do that for longer than I’d like to admit.” Shinobu quietly confessed, twisting a lock of (Y/n)’s hair though her fingers.

“Even when we were fighting?” (Y/n) joked, rubbing the back of Shinobu’s neck with her thumb.

“Strangely enough, yes. There were times when I thought about doing it just to shut you up. Though I didn’t dare allow myself to entertain the thought for long.”

(Y/n) chuckled and leaned in to steal another kiss, much less heated then the last few and much quicker as a chorus of surprised gasps made them pull apart and turn around.

“They kissed! They’re kissing!” Sumi cheered while Aoi tried to quiet her and push her back into the mansion.

Sumi and Kiyo emerged from the doorway that Shinobu had left open when she and (Y/n) first came out into the moonlight and were immediately hounding them for confirmation.

“We missed it! Do it again!” Kiyo pleaded.

“It’s like a fairy tale!” Naho cheered.

“You three!” Aoi grumbled with embarrassment. “Kanao, help me out here!”

Kanao looked between Aoi, the rowdy girls, then her sister and senpai, before settling on a nice golf clap of congratulations. This made Aoi lightly smack herself in the face and completely give up on trying to rein in the younger children.

“My, what are you all doing up I wonder?” Shinobu smiled.

“We wanted to watch the moon too Shinobu-sama! Aoi-san even made tea!” Naho clapped.

“But it’s clear you’re, busy, with something and we should go back inside.” Aoi rushed.

“Nonsense, it’s a lovely night. These things are best experienced with those you care about, don’t you all agree?”

“Yes!” Three excited voices readily agreed before wiggling in between the older girls with light blankets and their tea.

Aoi grumbled a half hearted reminder to be careful with the tea before sitting down beside (Y/n) with her own cup. Kanao took a seat beside Shinobu, lightly kicking her feet over the engawa as she started up silently at the moon.

They stayed up for hours, naming constellations, spotting shooting stars, and listening for the occasional loud croak of a far off frog in the thick of the cicadas and crickets.

Dawn wasn’t too far off when Naho, Sumi and Kiyo fell asleep. (Y/n), Shinobu and Kanao each picked one up and returned them to their rooms. Aoi gathered the discarded cups and helped with the doors before bidding the older girls goodnight, Kanao trailing behind her.

“What a lively night. I’m afraid chores will suffer tomorrow.” Shinobu mused as she walked (Y/n) back to her room.

“We’ll figure it out.” (Y/n) said, shyly brushing her hand against Shinobu’s and smiling when Shinobu laced their fingers together.

Once at (Y/n)’s room Shinobu raised (Y/n)’s hand to her lips with a smirk, planting a kiss on battle worn knuckles.

“This is where I leave you. I’ll see you in a few hours.”

“Why does that feel too long?” (Y/n) laughed quietly.

“I’m not sure, you’d think after four years of bitter silence a couple of hours would be a walk in the park.” Shinobu chuckled in return.

“I guess we just have a lot of time to make up for, huh?”

“Mm, that is a plausible line of reasoning,” Shinobu hummed, a spark growing in her eyes, “might I trouble you for one more kiss before I retire to my room?”

“I was hoping you’d ask.”

(Y/n) hardly got the words out before Shinobu was on her. Four kisses later and they pulled away with matching grins.

“I’ll see you in my dreams.” Shinobu added one last peck before pulling away.

“As will I.”

***

Well into the next morning (Y/n) awoke energized and ready to fight the world. She changed into a fresh uniform and pinned her hair with care, straightening the butterfly pin before rushing out of her room to begin her day with the young woman who had gifted it to her.

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