#feel the mild spoiler tag fit a lot with this post in particular

[theultimatekamehamehavoc]

Toko Time! Spoiler Warning of course (though it's barely anything)

First off, Toko's casual attire! I gave her a cute little sun hat for one. I thought it'd be cute but also as good protection of the sun as well as a cute way to hide her face if she ever got a bit shy. Additionally, I feel Toko would be prone to sunburns. Thus, I got her protected while also having her be stylish in her blouse, long skirt, and pretty heels. The heels aren't too long though as I feel those wouldn't be her style. Perhaps Toko would find longer heels a bit gaudy. Plus, I feel she'd be probe to twist an ankle in those. Also, the choker I added on her was a choice I made on a whim. Just felt like mentioning that. Moreover, Toko's work attire. For my AU, for one, she's still writing away with her novels, especially now that she's got more time to herself along with more life experience that can channel more stories. So, in a way, she doesn't really have work attire. It's more that she goes and dresses up a bit more than her casual attire. After all, Toko's a gal who has her fashion sense aligned well with mostly formal attire anyway. As for the specifics of her attire, I gave her a cute little vest for the vibes. Gotta have some nice puffy sleaves too along with some more fancy heels, some leggings, a nice skirt with an adjustable zipper, and a bag to keep some of her stuff in! Feel she wouldn't carry much in there but perhaps just useful stuff like a notebook or two, some pens, her phone, and some feminine hygiene products in case of an emergency. Those are for Komaru though since she's a bit of a girl failure still. Additional info about her work in general is that, when she's not writing away in her room, she helps Komaru out and is sort of like the co-owner of Komaru's little shop. The store has a ton of books, manga's, comics. Haven't fully thought of all the little stuff that would be there but I feel it'd be a bit like a thrift store where there's a bit of everything in there, from scarfs to handmade sweaters little trinkets. Maybe there is also a donation thing going on too where one can donate an item to the shop in exchange for some cash or maybe another item. There can be a little system there! Komaru works on the store independently for the most part. She deserves to be independent after all! Komaru does has good support from Toko as well as occasional help from Byakuya. I also like to think that Toko herself might work at a library on her own. The library wouldn't be that far away from Komaru's shop as well as the two's apartment. I like to think that Toko, with age, would venture out a bit more and gain some more confidence. She's still an introvert at heart of course! Plus, though she keeps a low profile in life, she still is a well known figure both from her talent, being in the killing game, and what she did with Komaru by helping save Towa city.

For her physical build, Toko fans, rejoice!! She's at a healthy weight!! She's taking care of herself!! One main thing of note in Toko's better physical care is her hair. For one, it's shorter, perhaps Toko cutting it at some point to really get rid of the previous tangles she had before slowly going to restore her hair's heath. Additionally, her hair's got some layering to it and is done fairly loose. I like to think that Toko in her youth did her braids too tight. Maybe to compensate for her lack of showers or that she didn't brush all that well. Not anymore though! Some other things of note I'd like to mention are her undergarments. I see her as the type to want to feel pretty both on the outside and inside. This is the case once having a lot more money to herself and can have that ability to treat herself. Toko's time with Komaru and the two of them still living together has certainly helped as well with the both of them having each other's backs. I'd like to think though that, at some point, Toko would like to move out at some point to her own place. Maybe she's only stayed with Komaru for so long out of habit or to help keep Komaru safe. Toko cares for Komaru a lot after all! I like the idea of Toko going and becoming more in charge with her life though. A Toko who's taking initiative! Something like that.

I'd say I'm pretty happy with how Toko's turned out! Might be some edits I'd to to her design but nothing too crazy. And no worries. A certain fiend is still going to have her own time to shine! May take a bit for the next design but it won't be too long! (1) | (5)

[galadrieljones]

For the DVD commentary, TDS chapter 24

“You seem different,” she said, tracing her thumb across each of his eyebrows. “Is everything okay?”

“Of course,” he said, soft.

“In the carriage, on the way home,” she said, looking down, “last night. You were out of it. You said some things.”

He reached up, lifted her chin to find her eyes again. “I’m sorry.”

“It’s okay,” she said.

“Talk to me, vhenan.”

“I just—I get worried sometimes, Solas.”

“I know.”

“I want you to trust me.”

This was an arrow. It struck him, hard. “Of course I trust you,“ he said.

“I won’t push you, Solas.” She was fighting him with her chin. She wanted to look down. He had to let her. “That’s not who I am, but sometimes, the things you say—it’s like you’re asking me. To push you. So that you can push me away.”

“Is that what it feels like?” he said. “Is that what you think I’m trying to do?”

“I’m sorry,” she said, putting her face into his chest. “I’m doing it wrong.”

“No, you’re not,” he said. “Sit up, please. Isene, look at me.”

She listened, sat up. He held her by her wrists. She was watching him now, searching out the insecurities. Where did they live? What were their shapes and noises? She’d sensed them, but she couldn’t see them, couldn’t get her hands on them. So elusive. His eyes were glass now. Shimmer, wet. She’d hurt him, or scared him. She pressed her palm to his cheek, then down to his neck and shook her head. “Just tell me what’s going on,” she said.

“I will,” he said. She could feel his pulse, fast, hard beneath her hand. He seemed to be choking on the words. He sat up, quickly from beneath her, gathered her hands into his, pressed them to his mouth. He looked her in the eye. “I will.”

She almost wanted to cry. But she wouldn’t. It was morning, and she was thirsty, and she hated crying anyway, and there he was, breaking beneath her, so devastatingly loyal. She could see it, in his eyes. She knew it already, but still, it made her weak that morning. It also made her needful.

Sene’s heart, a bright, hot coin with both sides the same.

“Okay,” she said.

He let go his breath. She didn’t realize he’d been holding it. He smiled, still somehow terrified, but relieved. He closed his eyes and pressed his forehead to hers. The touch, like a renewal between them. A reminder, hot skin. Breath shaking. She held the back of his neck. Something changed.

“I trust you, Sene,” he said. “I trust you. You must know this. After everything. Lanas em dir’vhen’an. Sathan, Isene.”

She shifted, fitting to him, warm and growing hard against her from beneath the sheet. His mouth on her neck now. Helpless to her. “Dhruan in’na, Solas,” she said to him. “You’re a good man.”

I hope I’m sending this in the right place… the character limit on the ask function is too short.

Hey! Yes. Thank you, @noraspancakes!!  Sorry it took me so long to get to this!! Like last time, I’ll stick this under a cut and tag a couple people who may be interested. This contains some mild TDS spoilers, nothing past Chapter 40. Also if anyone else wants me to tag them in stuff like this please just let me know!!

This is a moment that I haven’t really thought about in a long time, but it’s really important to Sene and Solas and their development as a couple, so I’m glad you brought it up!! I’ve recently gone back through TDS to separate it into natural, shorter, single-book-length sections, and this chapter, The Way Out, is actually the first chapter in the second book, Fall. This comes right after Solas’s near breakthrough in the carriage on the way home from the party in Val Royeaux, when he’s a little drunk and on the verge of his first of two serious mental breaks. Sensing his own pending epiphany, he goes to visit Thom Rainier in jail for advice–Thom becomes Solas’s central guide figure then for the majority of TDS. This is the next morning and what I sort of count as his descent into the Belly of the Whale (per the Hero’s Journey), which he continues to toil through until just before their return to the Emprise du Lion.

This moment illustrates three major things: one is about Solas, one is about Sene, and one is about ME. Per Solas, we have a man who wants so badly to tell Sene the truth about who he is, but who can’t for the life of him figure out what the fuck the whole truth is, or where or how to even begin. He’s somewhere between repression and resurfacing at this point, and it’s a lot–A LOT. He’s floundering, quite a bit, and though I never really address it in the writing, I feel it’s at least in part the fancy Val Royeaux party (reminiscent of his day’s at Mythal’s Blue Fortress) that truly initiated the process. 

In the beginning of their relationship, it was okay that Solas was sort of a mystery, even preferable or sexy, but as time went on, of course, Sene becomes privy to the fact that something is wrong, and so naturally, she’s worried. He is very stoic and plays it very cool, and so part of her, being both inexperienced and a little insecure, wonders if this just means he doesn’t trust her, if she means less to him than she initially thought she did.

And so for Sene in particular: this is the moment where she realizes (only AFTER they have sex, which comes immediately after this conversation) how much she and Solas have been using sex to absorb and deflect any and all of their fears and insecurities. Solas is swept away in the worship of her, and her body, and all that she’s given him in the way of an anchor to the world, and she’s swept away by the excitement of their love, its newness, and relatively new seriousness. This is the beginning of a major shift in the dynamic between them. Sene takes the reigns emotionally while Solas sorts his shit out. This goes on for a WHILE. Soon after this very conversation, and Sene’s initial broaching of the topic, Solas breaks up with her in martyr fashion, and then he sort of goes back on that during their conversation on the ledge (post-Abelas). Sene then has to initiate a separation from him, because he seemingly just can’t help himself.

Sene and Solas in physical separation is a major theme I write through a couple times in TDS–when they must learn to overcome their particular codependence and solve their problems alone. No sex or doting lover to enable their cowardice. This is sort of the beginning of their first major separation. The second comes after Corypheus, when Sene goes to Ansburg.

Now, finally, this scene for ME: This is about when I started to realize that Solas would never leave. Up until Crestwood, I thought he was still going to leave. The entire plot of TDS had a very different outcome. But after Val Royeaux, i.e.: scenes like this, I started to accept that this was actually a story about a version of Solas who does NOT leave, and that the story was deeply canon divergent in this way. You can go back and see me vacillating a LITTLE from about here until after his first confrontation with Abelas in Chapter 26: The Winged Girl. I did not make my absolute CERTAIN choice that Solas would NOT be leaving until after Chapter 31: Thirty Years of Snow, where he tells Sene about the miscarriage. I then pointedly forced myself into commitment by having Solas confront Mythal about his change of plans in the Crossroads. It’s shortly after this that the shit hits the fan completely, i.e.: Mythal returns in the flesh.

Anyway, thank you for the ask!! This was interesting. 

Per your interest: @thevikingwoman @amburuthings @buttsonthebeach

DVD Commentary: Send me an excerpt from one of my works, and I’ll give you the in-depth DVD Commentary