#feel free to add on with resources for whatever country you're in as i realize disability rights and workplace protections vary by country

[exlibrisfangirl]

Hey, hope your doing okay! I was just wondering if you had any advice about how to deal with ableist co workers? I have Crohn’s disease, so I have a weakened immune system. I have been out of work a lot recently due to flares and RSV, so I’ve been having people covering my shift. I asked someone to in the group chat and this girl said I should just quit. I kindly said I have an invisible disability and tried to be polite. She continued with ableist comments and even asked if Crohn’s was even a disability like I didn’t know what I was talking about. Just trying to think about how to handle the situation and if I should bring it up to management. If you have any advice, I’d be glad to hear it! Thanks!

Dear Nonny,

I am... SO sorry it took me forever to respond to this. I saw it, and then... shit kinda hit the fan in my personal life, and I forgot about it. *hangs head in shame*

I am actually dealing with a slightly similar situation at work at the moment. A coworker has been bullying me for a couple months now, which includes: a) giving me the silent treatment, b) undermining my authority with our clients at every opportunity, and c) talking shit about me to our other coworkers, including saying that she thinks that I am faking my medical conditions/don't actually have any "valid" medical conditions, and that she won't believe anything I say until she sees my "medical records" (which, of course, she has no right to demand). I have just recently met with my boss and HR and filed a formal grievance. I'm still awaiting the outcome, but, in the meantime, my boss has changed my schedule so I don't have to work with that coworker.

Unfortunately, this is not my first rodeo, and I've learned a lot over the years regarding how to deal with workplace/coworker issues as a chronically ill and disabled person.

Here's my advice...

First and foremost, know your company's policies on bullying/harassment and workplace discrimination, as well as your state/federal rights. (I don't know what country you live in, but I've dealt with this in the USA and in the UK, and I know they have similar protections in place. Here's an overview of your federal rights in the USA from the ACLU website.) At my workplace, in our staff handbook, there is a section which outlines our code of conduct and explains that any employee can face disciplinary action - up to and including immediate termination - for violating any of those expectations. Bullying and harassment are specifically mentioned. There is also a section which explains our rights as employees, including disability rights and what to do if we believe we have been discriminated against and/or wrongfully terminated.

Secondly, document EVERYTHING. Document what this coworker says to you and when. If there were witnesses, document that, too. If/when you choose to bring your boss/HR into it, they may ask for specific details, dates, and whether or not there were any witnesses present. I keep a running list in the note-taking app on my phone, so that I can easily access it during meetings, as well as copy and paste easily into emails.

Last, but not least: in my experience, the earlier you involve management the better, and be persistent. If you let the behavior go unchecked for a long time before you say anything, your boss *might* interpret that as "it must not be thaaat bad, so I can put it on the back burner". Make it very clear from the beginning that you a) want to be there/want that job, b) know your rights, and c) expect action to be taken and follow-up to take place. Employers generally do not want to risk being sued (or risk losing employees... or at the very least risk getting a bad reputation, which might deter potential future employees), so this will usually get them to take your concerns seriously and address them promptly. If that is not the case, and your workplace has an HR representative/department, telling your boss you'd like to meet with HR will likely do the trick; your supervisor/boss doesn't want to get in trouble with HR. The same goes for your union rep, if you are part of a labor union. Don’t hesitate to seek support from higher up the ladder (e.g. your boss's boss, etc.) if your boss doesn't seem to be taking you seriously or isn't taking prompt action to address your coworker's behavior.

Let me make this very clear: You don’t owe your coworker SQUAT. She is not your boss. She has no right to your personal medical information, and you do not owe her an explanation. If you really want to, you could perhaps send her a link to an educational website where she can read more about your condition on her own time, but please don't waste any further time and energy trying to educate her. If she truly wants to learn, she will. If she just wants to be an asshole (which is what I suspect is the case), she won't even bother reading the info you provide. Either way, your coworkers do not have the right to demand details or proof of your disabilities/illnesses, and you should not have to disclose personal medical information to your coworkers in order to be treated with respect and dignity in your workplace.

Read it... and then read it again. And again. And again.

You should not have to disclose personal medical information to your coworkers in order to be treated with respect and dignity in your workplace.

Feel free to plagiarize me and borrow/quote/adapt as much of this as you like for use with your coworkers and management. (Is it still plagiarism if I give you permission? 🤔)

I hope this has helped, even just a little, and I truly hope your situation improves soon! Stay strong, Nonny. Spoonie solidarity! 🥄💜

[thecreepycrawlersss]

so.

trump won.

to everyone who will be affected by project 2025, please. please stay alive.

do whatever you need to do to stay alive. please.

it’s gonna get scary, so right now it is extremely important to have a plan, preferably multiple, in place.

we’ve compiled some recourses that we think are helpful. will add to this, don’t be scared to recommend recourses to add !!

help understand and fight against project 2025

good recourses if you decide to run away / end up homeless

Other Resources & Services Food, Housing, Legal, Disabled - BeTheDifferenceSCV.org

recourses for moving to another country / seeking asylum

Refugees, Asylum Seekers and Migrants - Amnesty International

What would happen if an American was to flee the USA to claim asylum in other countries? : r/AmerExit

7 Industrialized Countries to Safely Seek Asylum-商务印书馆英语世界

recourses for marginalized people

Transgender Resources | GLAAD

Resources For Women - BeTheDifferenceSCV.org

Resources And Support For Black, Indigenous, And Other People Of Color - BeTheDifferenceSCV.org

Resources For LGBTQIA2+ - BeTheDifferenceSCV.org

Resources for Youth and Yound Adults - BeTheDifferenceSCV.org

what to do now

and of course, make sure to do your daily clicks