#fat bitches fuckin too hard 💀

[mysweetlapetitemort]

.

[definitely-not-a-orange-lollipop]

What's up guys! It's Quandale Dingle here! (RUUEHEHEHEHEHEEHE) I have been arrested for multiple crimes (AHHHHHHHHHHHHH) including: Battery on a police officer (WHAT), Grand theft, Declaring war on Italy, and public indecency (RUHEHEHEEHEHEHEHEHEHEHE X2 speed). I will be escaping prison on, MARCH 28TH! After that.... I WILL TAKE OVER THE WORLD

I’ve come to make an announcement: Shadow the Hedgehog’s a bitch ass mother fucker. He pissed on my fucking wife. That’s right, he took his hedgehog fuckin' quilly dick out and he pissed on my fucking wife, and he said his dick was THIS BIG. And I said “that’s disgusting!” So I’m making a callout post on my twitter dot com: "Shadow the Hedgehog, you got a small dick, it’s the size of this walnut except WAY smaller." And guess what, here’s what my dong looks like: PFFFFFFFFGJT. That’s right baby. All point, no quills, no pillows, look at that it looks like two balls and a bong. He fucked my wife so guess what, I’m gonna FUCK THE EARTH. THATS RIGHT THIS IS WHAT YOU GET, MY SUPER LAZER PISS. Except I’m not gonna piss on the earth, I’m gonna go higher. I’m pissing on the MOOOOOON! How do you like that, OBAMA? I PISSED ON THE MOON, YOU IDIOT! You have twenty-three hours before the piss d r o p l e t s hit the fucking earth, now get out of my fucking sight before I piss on you too!

#not my smile inc

jokes on you i don't have organs >:)

I think you may have forgotten “Own a musket for home defense, since that's what the founding fathers intended. Four ruffians break into my house. "What the devil?" As I grab my powdered wig and Kentucky rifle. Blow a golf ball sized hole through the first man, he's dead on the spot. Draw my pistol on the second man, miss him entirely because it's smoothbore and nails the neighbors dog. I have to resort to the cannon mounted at the top of the stairs loaded with grape shot, "Tally ho lads" the grape shot shreds two men in the blast, the sound and extra shrapnel set off car alarms. Fix bayonet and charge the last terrified rapscallion. He Bleeds out waiting on the police to arrive since triangular bayonet wounds are impossible to stitch up. Just as the founding fathers intended.”

I cited the fourth amendment word for word and also sourced it on the poll 💀

(I am now a true American RAAAAAAH 🔥🔥🔥🦅🦅🦅🦅)

Irizz

Hey, hey look! Hey look! Look. glass jar

The FitnessGram™ Pacer Test is a multistage aerobic capacity test that progressively gets more difficult as it continues. The 20 meter pacer test will begin in 30 seconds. Line up at the start. The running speed starts slowly, but gets faster each minute after you hear this signal. [beep] A single lap should be completed each time you hear this sound. [ding] Remember to run in a straight line, and run as long as possible. The second time you fail to complete a lap before the sound, your test is over. The test will begin on the word start. On your mark, get ready, start.

Postman, postman

Fucked the whole area

(Well done indeed)

Without error exactly

And he will fuck you to your kidneys

Writing's not that easy, but Grammarly can help. This sentence is grammatically correct, but it's wordy and hard to read. It undermines the writer's message, and the word choice is bland. Grammarly's cutting-edge technology helps you craft compelling, understandable writing that makes an impact on your reader.

According to all known laws of aviation, there is no way a bee should be able to fly. Its wings are too small to get its fat little body off the ground. The bee, of course, flies anyway because bees don't care what humans think is impossible.

What is up little spoon,

I am sending you this because I do not want you to mutate the Solar System. Please do not mutate the Solar System or I'm gonna have to send all the alphas after you :)

What is a spoon, little spoon

what is spoon, little

Spoon little is what? Up

Crazy? I was crazy once. They locked me in a room. A rubber room! A rubber room with rats,and rats make me crazy. Crazy? I was crazy once. They locked me in a room. A rubber room! A rubber room with rats,and rats make me crazy. Crazy? I was crazy once-

talk to the hand cause the face doesn't wanna hear it-

Postman, postman

Turned the entire neighborhood into beans

(Well done indeed)

Without error exactly

And he’ll turn your kidneys into kidney beans

Zoozve

Gaynamede

Irizz

мый тыйым ебать пычал дене лӱйкалем

What's up guys, it's Quandale Dingle here

REEHEHEHEHEHE

Have you ever been slapped by a wet spaghetti noodle because your girlfriend has a twin sister so you got confused and fucked her dad?

Well that's how it feels to drive a Ford F-250

your car is smoking

...

I dont even own a car

Are you mentally okay

This is a shit lot

[glowinthedarkz0mbie]

Genuinely hilarious to put my last "relationship" into perspective.

1. We get 2gether, idgaf if he sexts anyone, anytime, idgaf if he finds someone better (I literally implored him...)

2. I spend about five years feeling immense guilt for even thinking about how cute anyone else is because bf didn't really communicate how he felt about that. (Until the very end ???)

3. I fall in love with someone who understands me like nobody I've met before, someone who's showed me that i don't actually know what it's like to be respected and loved, somebody who is the kindest most hard working person I've ever met, our personalities are a million times more compatible, they don't make me feel pressured to do things I really don't want to, they don't make me insecure about my body and then say I did that to them(he's a fucking twig calling himself fat. How tf u think that makes ME feel you stupid ugly bitch I WEIGH MORE THAN YOU!!!!😒 kys.)

4. I decide to be honest and tell him straight up when we start feeling sexual tension between us.

5. He becomes possessive, starts showing the same signs he literally watched me break up with people for ???

6. Becomes incredibly hostile towards my best friend, someone who has more life experience, wisdom, intelligence and genuine skill that he will legit ever have. I also knew from the beginning that he would be attracted to them too but whatever bozo LMAOO, we break up after he goes through my phone as I'm sleeping.(and yeah, RLLY shoulda done that sooner but the way he was acting was really scaring me. NOW I KNOW WHY 🙂)

7. He reveals his true personality bit by bit (cyberbullying my best friend, brainwashing them into hating themself, continuously violated their privacy, manipulated tf out of us.) and the more I get to know him the more I remember how much he legitimately didn't know the first things about me during the relationship. He literally faked so much...lied SO MUCH. five years wasted on somebody I didn't fucking know. Someone who absolutely would have fucking made fun of me in school. Someone who will never have the life experience to even understand me or anything about me.

8. I find out about him harassing my bestie, I set the record straight and tell him EXACTLY what the fuck is up. He apologizes and says he was wrong and stupid blah blah blah.

9. Never really changes...ends up kinda just proving his apology meant nothing but then still tries to be friends with my bestie.

10. Starts being really fuckin weird with bestie, makes them uncomfortable a lot.

11. Ends up "falling in love" with them 💀

12. He gets pissed off and reveals himself as a true stereotypical male and feels like my bestie somehow OWES HIM for that little "friendship" he attempted with them ???? Yeah you can slit your throat and post it you ugly cunt. The fact that I really had the capacity to love THAT, and disregard so fucking much because I LOVED HIM. For him to say "you never loved me."

Pal, ONE of us loved the other enough to say "if you find someone who makes you happy I want you to be with them." And BITCH! IT WASNT YOU!

[ghost-of-the-machine]

im so ashamed actually!!!!!!!!!!! so terribly ashamed i feel like the most disgusting person in the world, cuz thats how intense my brain works it thinks like. oh have yr friends ever called furries weird or implied they thought furries were weird? that means they think you are weird which means they basically want nothing to do with you you should kill yourself NOW!!!!!! i said damn bitch!!!!!! god forbid a man be passionate about. things.

it really is just cuz it has nothing to do with them i think thats one of the core reasons, its completely unrelated and i dont think theyd be interested so... do not RISK IT. maybe im selfish, i just.. i cant stand the thought of something i do being unappealing to them, i cant stand the thought of them looking away. any little thing could be a huge thing!!!! could be the worst thing ever actually could be the end of all things could ruin this

do i think being a furry is going to ruin my relationships? realistically, no. why would it? ive ALWAYS been a furry artist, so.. why am i so scared? sorry if you have to see this its very VERY embarrassing but LORD i am not winning the mental illness rn dear god

its like my head constantly makes hurdles for itself, but like. FOR OTHER PEOPLE. like okay.. they dont hate you cuz yr trans, cool cool... they dont hate you cuz yr have bpd, surprisingly!!!! alright. they dont hate you cuz yr fat, right.. but heres this NEW thing, they SURELY will hate you cuz you draw anthros like you are FUCKED say goodbye to everything dipshit. erm........... whats it gonna be next? theyll hate yr taste in fictional men, thatll do it!!! theyll hate yr music taste, theyll hate you for yr mental illness (not that one, the other one. they were fine with that one but THIS one theyll hate you for surely)

it pisses me off too, i KNOW my friends are good people. i dont seriously THINK that of them, i dont think theyre vicious and waiting to toss me away at any turn but... im still scared of it. i said it before, im scared ill be the one to bring that out of them like im somehow SO terrible ill make the best people ive ever met turn on me like that. FOR DRAWING FURRIES? are you actually stupid (yes)

i cant blame myself too much im. doing the best i can im unmedicated untherapied im . IM DOING PRETTY GOOD for someone whos been carrying several weird ailments and still just chugging along, i manage my symptoms when i can i do my best!!! but fighting yr own brain is FUCKING HARD... why is bro sabotaging me? why is it making me impulsive and scared like that? stupid quit it!!!! i got furries to draw i MISS IT SO MUCH I MISS MY GUYS. IM JUST... im a coward!!!!! i cant ever be like. well so what, who cares what they think? ME BITCH I CARE WHAT THEY THINK.. i hear everything they say, i remember all the things they say they like and dont like, and i internalize it subconsciously. they think this is weird and they personally dont like it? alright well you dont have much of an opinion on it OR you do actually like it so thats BAD we need to cut that shit immediately you will feel SHAME for something harmless cuz you think itll make them keep you longer

dont you get tired of it? YEAH i get real fuckin tired of it. so many times ive tried to like.. force myself back into what i love but as embarrassing as it is to admit, in my head their opinion on things is greater than my own. i struggle with putting people on a pedestal and ive actually been doing REALLY WELL with that like no they are my equals they are my best friends i love them i give them kiss but. The Horrors 💀 like i said it all comes out of fear, fear of being rejected and left to DIE ALONE IN THE COLD. do i think thatll ever happen? no!!! but do i fear it? absolutely. its less of like 'i see you as better than me' and more of 'im afraid to disappoint you and make you leave' which i feel like is pretty standard for someone like me

WHATEVERRR i should stop being such a litle bitch about it, ill try. i just hate feeling like everything i do is a test, i hate feeling so unsure about myself, if i move too fast itll shatter. it wont!!!! relax 🙄