#fat acceptance tiktok is delusion hell

[onlyonewoman]

I’ve fallen down the rabbit hole of Fat Acceptance tiktok in the last few days and as a former obese person, I just wanna say hooooooooooly yiling patriarch and the last candy of Xue Yang, this is one crazy mess of delusion. 7 years ago, I was obese. Not morbidly obese, but definitely obese. My body ached, my thighs shafed against each other, I was exhausted, my joints, knees, hips and back hurt. I was 33 and had gone from someone of very good health to a slow but steady decrease over 10+ years, due to mental health problems. I managed to lose the excess weight when I lost my then job and got diagnosed with clinical, mental exhaustion. It took three years for me to recover and one part of my recovery was a slow, gentle weight loss. I lost more than 75 pounds over 2 years time, slow and steady and I have been at a healthy weight for about 5 years now. To me, it’s Just. So. Weird. to hear the fat acceptance people come with the wildest, unscientific, bat shit crazy lies about weight loss. I just can’t wrap my head around how it’s possible to make actual, measurable physical data to a purely opinion driven thing. There’s a reason why the vast majority of FA advocates are YOUNG. I was young once too and didn’t feel the years creeping up on me. I’m pushing 40 and with a heavy, physical job, I can feel the wear and tear each day. My back and shoulders ache easily, my joints are stiffer, I have to take extra care of my mobility with daily stretches. I can feel how it takes more effort to keep mobile and not be aching unnecessarily. And let me tell you this: had I been obese, I would’ve crumbled a long time ago and certainly not been working with the things I love. Because being obese at 20 is not the same thing as being obese at 30 or 40. It doesn’t matter, for real doesn’t matter, how much you proclaim your fat acceptance and pride, when you find yourself: - struggling more than before with the stairs - get problems maintaining your daily hygiene - slowly loosing your mobility - unable to get up from a nasty fall - struggling with diabetes - unable to dress yourself LOOK, I GET IT! The sickly thin body ideals SUCK. They SUCK BAD! Unhealthy and unreasonable ideals are a fucking bedsore of the mind, for real and yes, OF COURSE can thin people be really unhealthy too. Only a fool would claim normal weight automatically makes someone a healthy person. But for the everloving fuck, my dear tiktok generation of YOUNG, obese/fat/overweight people: While you are absolutely RIGHT to demand equal respect and dignity as human beings, it still DOESN’T make an obese - or starved! - body healthy. Yes, you’re being all sassy and confident, sparkling and pretty on TikTok now, because you’re YOUNG and don’t feel the inevitable downfall of your bodies yet - there will come a day when you do. And let me, as someone who has both been obese AND provided healthcare to obese AND morbidly obese people, tell you this: It doesn’t take an awful lot of overweight, for a 75-year-old to become completely dependent on bathroom assitance. It’s not fun for an 80-year-old to be turned and rolled in bed, while two from the nursing staff carefully change your poop filled diaper and the stench of diabetic pee hits you worse than the feces. You will NOT feel proud, self-loving and body positive, when you realise you have traded years of independence for a quick self-esteem boost. The choir chanting about “health at every size”, will not stand by your bedpan, will not put cream in your groin to help with your fungus infection. There will be no “fat and fab” feelings when your feet start to deteriorate because you can no longer reach down to care for them. And when you have a nasty fall, you will be too heavy and too weak to get up. Think about that last one. Do you even understand how difficult it is for medical staff to help someone of 350 pounds and up from the ground? Please, do not trade away years of better health for a temporary feeling of belonging and acceptance. Should weightloss be painful, humiliating, shallow and short term? Of course not. And no, you shouldn’t strive to be “perfect”, whatever that means, but you should be nice to your joints, your mobility, your intestins, your lungs and your energy levels. You deserve so much more kindness and quality in your life, than struggling with obesity. Because once you’re getting past 25 years, 30, 35... your body, like all bodies, will naturally age and age is NOT kind to obesity. There is no such thing as health at every size and in five years time, a lot of the now very fab, confident fat acceptance tiktok people will struggle with aspects of their health they thought was a myth, because for them, feelings rule supreme. Don’t let yourself be fooled. Because just as someone slowly starving themselves over a long period of time, the people who claim it’s okay to overeat throughout your life, will eventually loose years and quality of life and independence for it. It’s not about ideals, it’s about the only body you will have.