#ezlipsia

[andrewmoocow]

Steven Universe Snake Eyes chapter 3: Here Comes a New Challenger (originally posted on September 11, 2023)

AN: Buckle up ladies, gentlemen and every other gender in-between, we finally go back to Steven as he reaches Serpentes and comes face to face with King Cobralan, who I argue might be just as much Steven's opposite as Black Rutile was. Though unlike Black Rutile who wears how much of a sociopath she is on her sleeve and is not ashamed to show it, Cobralan is a pretty okay guy who has a very strange view on morality where anyone who doesn't like what he does can take a hike unless he can convince them otherwise. The Jormagundr royal family will all be very interesting characters for me to write, so I don't want to waste your time any longer.

Synopsis: Steven, Connie, Greg, Black Rutile, and Ronaldo finally reach Serpentes, where Steven is welcomed by the royal family.

Cast:

Zach Callison as Steven

Noël Wells as Black Rutile

Estelle as Garnet

Michaela Dietz as Amethyst

Deedee Magno-Hall as Pearl, The Black Pearl Brigade

Jennifer Paz as Lapis

Shelby Rabara as Peridot

Uzo Aduba as Bismuth

Kimberly Brooks as Jasper

Lauren Ash as White Topaz

Grace Rolek as Connie

Tom Scharpling as Greg

Zach Steel as Ronaldo

Aurelio Voltaire as King Cobralan Jormagundr

Shirley Millner as Queen Constricta Jormagundr

Jason Marsden as Prince Nosiop Jormagundr

Cissy Jones as Princess Naja Jormagundr

Henry Rollins as Captain Boa

Keith David as Pyth

Neil Flynn as Aescul

Patti LuPone as Yellow Diamond

Lisa Hannigan as Blue Diamond

Christine Ebersole as White Diamond

John Moschitta Jr. as Bialyoom Milamin

Stephanie Escajeda as Meinerr

Nicole Sullivan as Sylvia Spectre

Kari Wahlgren as Envyrno

Featuring JP Karliak as S-L1M3

Dominic Armato as Captain Gearfeet

Wally Wingert as Rigby Starglow

Britt Baron as Michelle Angelon

Julissa Aguirre as Lady Imagineer

Rob Paulsen as Monty the Moarchean

Steven Blum as Deputy Edward

Beau Billingslea as Sheriff Spiegel

Christopher Lloyd as Batsputin Vosania

Anna Akana as Dionna of the Sands

Peter Stormare as Reximillian

Elizabeth Maxwell as Vigrid

James Earl Jones as Wobbla the Butt

Barrett Wilbert Weed as Ezlipsia

And Anthony Stewart Head as Solaris Noctua

--

"Well, here we are on the Slytherophidian home planet of Serpentes!" Aescul exclaimed as his ship returned home at last and landed in Alethinophidia. "Ah, it's good to be back home after so many years. Now watch your step as you get out, everybody."

"Wow, I haven't been on an alien planet in this long." Connie gasped in amazement as she took in the sights and sounds of Serpentes. "This is the place where they took the Gems, right?"

"Seems like it," Steven answered as he followed Connie out of Aescul's ship. "I thought Ronaldo was just talking crazy when he said the Slytherophidians existed, but I never realized they were real all along."

"Finally!" Ronaldo cried as he burst from the spaceship and began harassing Slytherophidians for their knowledge. "Excuse me, sir, do you have any holidays you celebrate on your planet?" The snake awkwardly slithered away in response. "Okay, I'll ask you later." Ronaldo then walked over to another snake. "What kind of food do you eat here?" The snake slithered away as well. "Hm, tough crowd."

"Okay big guy, now that we're here, I think it's about time we see your boss," Greg said to Aescul as the two walked out of Aescul's ship. "The Crystal Gems are getting us real worried, and I do not want to see any of them losing a head or two. Then again, they can just walk it off."

"Don't worry, everyone will know he's here," Aescul assured Greg as Steven quickly became surrounded by Slytherophidians wanting to meet him. "See what I mean?"

"Uh, hello everybody." Steven nervously said to the Slytherophidians surrounding him. "My name's Steven Universe. Nice to meet you all."

"Oh my gosh, it's Steven!" a young female Slytherophidian squealed eagerly. "Sign my face, please!"

"Hey now, no need to get too obsessed over me, I'm just here to get my friends back." Steven laughed. "The last time I discovered my fans, they chased me all around the country."

"Is that Steven Universe I see?!" Pyth asked as he arrived on the scene and gently pushed his king's subjects out of the way. "Greetings my boy, I am the royal advisor Pyth and I'm here on behalf of his royal highness Cobralan Jormagundr to collect you and bring you to him. Your mission, should you choose to accept it, is to fight for survival in the Ouraborium if you want your friends back."

"Wait, fight for survival? You mean you want me to kill people in this world?" Steven gasped in surprise before being wrapped in Pyth's tail and taken away.

"Unfortunately for you, yes," Pyth explained. "More will be revealed once you meet our ruler." He then turned to look back at Greg, Connie, Ronaldo, and Lion. "And take those four along with him and throw them with the other competitors."

"Wait, you want us to fight too?" Greg asked before the three humans were seized by the royal guards. "But we're just puny, squishy Earthlings, we'll all die in there!"

"That's the idea," Pyth replied with a villainous sneer as he turned back to Steven, who was looking at him with a face full of worry and suspicion.

"Looks like our new arrival is gathering quite a crowd." King Cobralan said as he watched the commotion with Captain Boa from above. "As expected for the legendary Steven Universe."

"My enforcers tell me that Pyth should be here momentarily with Mr. Universe." Boa calmly stated. "Plus, his plus-ones shall be sentenced to the Ouraborium until further notice."

"All I needed to hear, Captain. You are dismissed." Cobralan stated and commanded Boa to leave before taking a glass of Slytherophidian alcohol and taking a sip before Steven was escorted into his quarters. "Steven Universe, we meet at last! Apologies for the way I had to get your attention, but I know you love those Gems so much!"

"Enough with the pleasantries, just give me my friends back and leave my planet alone!" Steven abruptly yelled at Cobralan, shocking the king of the snake people at how curt his guest was.

"Wow, I'd thought you'd be way nicer than that," Cobralan said before offering his drinking glass to Steven. "You look stressed. Care for a drink? Finest snake oil on the planet, aged to perfection."

"Sorry, I'm not a drinker." Steven turned down the offer. "I just want to get in, get my friends back, and get out. That's all I want."

"All you want?" Cobralan asked before sitting Steven down at a bar and ordering his servant to pour another glass of snake oil. "Well, what are you willing to do for it?"

"What do I want to do for it?" Steven muttered before he heard music playing. "Wait, are you going to do what I think you're doing?"

"Right here, right now, come on, just hear me out. I don't wanna strike you down, I hope you come in peace." Cobralan began singing to convince Steven. "You fight for me, and I'll set your friends free. Out of the carnage and the violence they're trapped in." The bartender serving as the king's backup passed Steven a glass of snake oil. "Just trade your life so peaceful, for something more colorful. If you think it's crazy, well sometimes, crazy works. You can play it normal, you king of traditional. Or you can risk your life and see!"

"Don't you want to get away, from the boring life you live every day? Because I have just what you need, so come with me and you shall see!" Cobralan exclaimed as he slithered on the walls and spun around a flagpole. "All you need to do is fight for me! I'll let you do as you do, or you can do it like me. Fight in my games and I'll surely give you the key. Oh dang, the audience will be filled with glee! All you have to do is fight for me!"

"Thank you, but no, I don't want in on your show. I hate to tell you, but I'm not the killing type." Steven objected to Cobralan's offer while pushing the glass away. "Thank you, but no, just let all of my friends go. I don't want to slaughter just for the hype. I'm not sure if I like you, and this whole show you do. Without violence, you're nothing. Yes, you're nothing." Cobralan wasn't sure if he should be offended by the remark or impressed at Steven's audacity. "But I just want to live in peace, and not covered in grease. What would make me reconsider you?"

The servant quickly took the glass away as Steven continued singing. "Don't you think I'll be okay, with murdering innocents every day? I still got what I need, count me out of your crew. I would never fight for you!" Cobralan started nodding along to the song while banging the floor with his tail to the beat. "But you can still do as you do, just do not involve me. Just let my friends go, I don't even need a key! I am rubber and what you say won't stick to me like glue. What makes you think I'll fight for you?"

"Now, is this how you'd prefer to spend your days," Cobralan asked with a scaly arm on Steven's shoulder while Boa played the piano in the background. "With songs and ice cream and playing it safe?"

"If I were joining you, people would never let me live it down," Steven responded. "Disgraced and regretful, with a big ol' frown."

"But you'd finally see my point now, stop with that furrowed brow. Sometimes, fighting's the only thing we need." Cobralan replied while twisting Steven's mouth into a smile with his hands. "I'll finally wake you up, and stop your heart from breaking. Keep that little organ from aching." Putting his hands away, Cobralan turned around and stood back-to-back with Steven to await his answer. "Now, is my deal a little worth taking? I guess I'll leave it up to you."

"The answer is still no." Steven firmly declared, much to Cobralan's anger.

"No? NO?!" Cobralan asked, furious at the rejection while baring his fangs to intimidate Steven with. "I put on this whole song and dance number for you, and you still refuse?!" His face then perked up. "Oh wait, you must be joking! Well, don't make me laugh!"

"Your offer's intriguing, but I don't know how it would cost me." Steven began singing again. "I'll do whatever you want, just as long as you set everyone free."

"Oh, fair enough. I can free you from the action." Cobralan replied. "Just name your price, we can shake and make it happen."

"I wasn't born this morning, do whatever I think is fine." Steven declared while crossing his arms.

"Okay, just tell me already!" Cobralan urged his guest.

"Fine, I'll fight for you." Steven caved into Cobralan's requests, much to the snake king's delight.

"I knew you'd come through." Cobralan smiled happily before the two shook hands and became a duet.

"Don't you want to get away, from the boring life you live every day?" the half-Gem and the Slytherophidian king began singing in harmony. "Because I have just what you need, so come with me and you shall see! All you/I need to do is fight for me/you!"

"I'll let you do as you do, or you can do it like me." The two continued as the song reached a bombastic conclusion. "I have to fight for you! All I have to do is fight for you!"

"Wow, you're a surprisingly good singer," Steven said to Cobralan.

"Why thank you, I'm classically trained by my servants," Cobralan replied before summoning more guards with a clap of his hands. "Guards, bring Steven to his friends at the Ouraborium! And try not to be too rough on him, he's going through a lot right now."

"Okay guys, do your worst," Steven said as the snake guards took him away from Cobralan while he wondered just what went through the alien king cobra's head. He seemed nice on the surface, but he also forced species from across the stars to fight in his twisted gladiator games. Was Cobralan truly evil, or was Steven simply misunderstanding this new alien race and their morality? That would have to wait as Steven would soon be reunited with the Crystal Gems in time to fight in the Contest of Champions.

--

"Steven!" the Crystal Gems, Greg, Connie, and Ronaldo all cried out as Steven was thrown into the dungeon with the other competitors in the Contest of Champions, after which he was greeted with a big group hug.

"We're so glad you came for us!" Pearl exclaimed as she hugged Steven the tightest out of everybody in the dungeon.

"Yeah, really wish there was a better way to celebrate your birthday, little man." Amethyst laughed nervously before the hug dispersed.

"It's great that you came to rescue us, Steven," Garnet said with a smile before looking at Black Rutile, who was sulking in the background with her back against the wall. "Now what's she doing here?"

"Oh yeah, funny story," Steven said with a blush. "Black Rutile crashed on Earth at the same time I came back to Beach City because her team was abducted by the Slytherophidians, and now we've been forced to team up against a common enemy to save our friends."

"WHAT?!" the Gems all shouted in alarm at the idea that Steven would team up with someone like Black Rutile.

"Why are you so shocked? Half of you tried to kill him at some point in his life." Black Rutile deadpanned. "But yes, we had no choice but to align our interests to combat our new enemy and return everyone to Earth. Unfortunately," she shot Ronaldo a disdainful glare. "We picked up an unwanted passenger along the way."

"Hey, I volunteered on this adventure!" Ronaldo shouted, utterly offended.

"But in the meantime, while we wait for our turn to fight for our lives, allow me to introduce to you the other competitors." Black Rutile turned to face the many colorful characters forced to join the violence. "These are all the other individuals abducted by the royal family to fight in their games from across the universe. And I must say, this is a very stacked roster."

"Oh, saints be praised, I thought I was going to be dragged out to fight for a second!" a grasshopper-like alien gasped in delight as he skittered towards Steven to greet him. "Hello, my name's Monty! I'm a Moarchean from the planet Caelifera. Pleased to meet you, little one."

"Nice to meet you too," Steven replied to Monty while shaking his foreleg. "Who are the rest of these guys?"

"Oh, I believe we can help with that," Cap said before walking over to Sheriff Spiegel. "These are Sheriff Spiegel and Deputy Edward from Sergione-29."

"Howdy." Edward tipped his hat to Steven.

"These are Sylvia Spectre and Envyrno, who we fought before." Tails introduced the Coalition of Galaxies officer and the Magman mercenary next.

"Hello, Crystal Gems." Sylvia waved to the Gems, trying her best to keep a polite smile on her face.

"Oh great, their friends." Envyrno rolled her eyes.

"'Ello, I'm Rigby Starglow, I'm the biggest rock star in the universe." Rigby Starglow introduced himself with one flashy pose after another, making Greg think of the rock stars of his youth. "I got kidnapped here on my way to my next show."

"Call me Captain Gearfeet, mighty pirate and the third most feared pirate in the seven galaxies!" the cyborg Captain Gearfeet declared. "My crew and I accidentally raided a Slytherophidian ship, and I sacrificed myself to make sure they all got away."

"Call me Earthos, and the big guy above me is the Decimator," Earthos stated. "We fought your friends before you got here." The Decimator growled while nodding in agreement.

"You may call me S-L1M3." A cybernetic blob creature introduced himself. "My species has dedicated itself to self-improvement since the day we emerged from the primordial soup thanks to our advanced technology."

"I am Michelle Angelon." A figuratively and literally angelic-looking young woman with large white wings sprouting from her back added. "I am but a humble angel forced against my will to fight in such sinful battles while being separated from my home planet."

"And I'm Lady Imagineer." A jester-like humanoid stated as she took a break from her imaginary flute playing to meet Steven. "I can make your dreams into reality."

"They have abducted the Metals as well, but unfortunately, they're elsewhere in this arena." Black Rutile revealed just as Bialyoom and Meinerr entered the dungeon. "Oh, a servant. Let's make this quick, I don't tip the waiter."

"Ah, you-must-be-Steven-Universe!" Bialyoom greeted Steven. "It's-a-pleasure-to-meet-you-young-man. Here, my-card." He then lent his business card to Steven. "Here-in-this-arena, you'll-be-fighting-for-survival-against-a-variety-of-opponents-from-across-the-universe, and-your-reputation-means-everything-in-here-too."

"Hey, you kind of sound like that fast-talking guy from those old toy commercials." Greg pointed out Bialyoom's voice.

"Please, he's-nowhere-near-as-fast-as-I-am!" Bialyoom bragged.

"Now that you are here Steven, you will be pitted against your first opponent," Meinerr said while looking at her tablet. "And it shall be Miss Sylvia Spectre."

"Wait, me?!" Sylvia yelped in surprise as the guards grabbed her by the arms and dragged her away, while another pair did the same to Steven.

"Wait, I have to fight and kill people here?!" Steven cried before being separated from the Crystal Gems yet again.

"Them's the rules, my boy, whether you like it or not." Meinerr bluntly replied.

--

"And now ladies and gentlemen, the moment you've all been waiting for!" Naja announced to the excited fans of the Contest of Champions. "In this corner, all the way from planet Earth, is the one, the only, Steven Universe!" The audience began cheering as Steven was shoved out into the arena. "And in this corner, representing the Coalition of Galaxies, one of the last survivors of Invisibo-9, the illuminating invisible icon of justice, Sylvia Spectre!"

The crowd continued getting excited as Sylvia Spectre appeared from thin air, ready for a fight. "Now then, are you ready for some MORTAL COMBAT?!" Naja continued yelling, causing the crowd to cheer louder than ever. "That's what I like to hear! Heaven or hell, let's rock!"

As soon as the bell rang, Sylvia charged towards Steven and landed a furious punch to his face that sent him flying into a nearby wall. Although Steven was able to summon his shield to protect himself, Sylvia barely gave him any chances to fight back. "What's the big idea? I know we have no choice but to fight, but why are you so violent?!"

"It's because of you and your kind!" Sylvia declared while delivering a roundhouse kick to Steven's hip, causing the boy to fall over and run. "The Black Pearls may have taught me that you're not all bad and I took it to heart, even helping them a few times, but that doesn't mean I'll ever forgive you Diamonds for taking away my home and my family!"

"Oh, she just had to go there." Yellow Diamond groaned in disgust.

"Listen, I understand what you've been through, but revenge will only get you nowhere but down!" Steven said as he began throwing some punches of his own, but Sylvia was far faster. "Didn't the Black Pearls also teach you this?"

"Yes, but you think that simply forgiving the Diamonds and having them apologize will make everything better!" Sylvia said before trying to deliver a strong uppercut, but Steven dodged before her hit could connect. "And what's more, there are still Gems out there who refuse to accept what you've done!"

"Yeah, I know, I've dealt with them before!" Steven replied, utterly frustrated with Sylvia's anger before summoning his shield again and tossing it at her face. What he didn't realize however was that he was slowly starting to glow pink.

"And look at them, still running around because you think we should give peace to terrorists a chance!" Sylvia exclaimed, gesturing to Black Rutile and her rebels watching from afar, eager to see Steven be given the judgment he deserved and possibly killed too. "In my line of work, I've had to fight and defeat people who are no better than you are!"

"SHUT UP!" Steven burst into a pink-colored fit of rage and initiated a nonstop assault on Sylvia, managing to see right through her powers and attack every possible weakpoint she had. When Sylvia eventually lay beaten and bruised on the ground, Steven finally returned to his senses and realized what he had done before the audience started cheering.

"FINISH HER! FINISH HER! FINISH HER!" the crowd of Slytherophidians cheered as Steven looked around the arena at the audience urging him to land the killing blow. Although Sylvia was very harsh in her critiques of his worldview, Steven couldn't help but feel sorry for her because of how her prejudice was rooted in tragedy.

"No!" Steven firmly declared to the spectators. "I will never take a life for your amusement!" Everyone started gasping, and then they started booing Steven as he helped Sylvia up.

"Well, he's dead," Monty said flatly.

"Look, I'm sorry about what happened just now, it's just my powers that make me go crazy when I'm under extreme stress." Steven apologized to the Invisibon heroine. "I've been trying real hard to keep them under control, so please don't hold this against me."

"Wow, you really aren't anything like the Diamonds." Sylvia wheezed in surprise. "At least they're willing to admit their mistakes."

"Hey, hold on a minute," Steven said before he licked his hand and slapped his saliva-covered palm on Sylvia's injured wrist, making her cringe in disgust before the spit suddenly healed all her wounds. "There, all better!"

"You can do that?" Sylvia gasped in wonder at Steven's abilities. "Please, tell me more of what you can do!"

"I'll talk later." Steven replied. "But right now, I'm sure certain people have some choice words for me."

--

"WHAT-WERE-YOU-THINKING?!" Bialyoom shrieked angrily once Steven returned from his fight. "The-Crystal-Gems-sparing-their-opponents-was-embarassing-enough, but-you-had-the-power-to-kill-Sylvia-Spectre-right-then-and-there! There-are-three-ways-to-win. One, you-knock-your-opponent-out. Two, the-opponent-quits, and-shouts-'Uncle!' Three, you-kill-them-right-on-the-spot!"

"I know the rules, but you should know that Sylvia here lost her family years ago." Steven objected. "She was so lost and angry at Gems for destroying her home, that she decided to take her anger out on me even though she learned Gems aren't all bad."

"We're very proud of you for sticking to your morals, Steven." Blue Diamond sighed in relief, prompting Sylvia to give the Diamonds the stink-eye before Steven calmed her down.

"Oh, she's got a temper." White Diamond declared with a joking smirk.

"So what do we do now?" White Topaz asked. "Are we just gonna keep killing people until they let us go?"

"I guess we have no other choice." Yellow folded her arms in acceptance. "Steven, you tried convincing the king to let us go, correct?"

"Yeah, but he got really mad that I didn't like his way of thinking while we were singing together," Steven replied. "I just want to know what goes on in that head of his. Does he have some kind of generational trauma he doesn't want to talk about?"

"Steven, you know not everything can be solved by talking to people." Black Rutile crossly said to her archnemesis. "Oh forget it, I'm too good for all of you anyways." She then turned around and stormed off. "Call me when one of you dies looking like a total fool or something!"

"Are you sure she's teamed up with you to save us?" Blue asked Steven.

"I'm sure, but I can't help but feel she probably has some kind of ulterior motive," Steven replied as Black Rutile retreated into the shadows.

--

"What's taking everyone so long?" Cobralan muttered to himself while pacing around his throne room and looking at his watch. "They should've been here in time for the opening ceremonies, but they're running late!"

"Don't worry my darling, they never once refused to come to the Contest." Constricta tried easing her husband's worries. "Why should they do so now?"

"Your Majesty, the other Universal Lords are here." Captain Boa stated as he slithered into the room with Dionna of the Sands, Batsputin Vosania, Reximillian, Vigrid, Wobbla the Butt, Ezlipsia, and even the long-retired Solaris Noctua behind him.

"Sorry, we were so late, Cobralan." Solaris apologized on behalf of his former fellow Universal Lords. "Space traffic was an utter nightmare."

"We've heard word that you have captured a vast assortment of Gems to compete this year," Vigrid stated. "Could we perhaps get a look at them?"

"Wait a second everyone, you all just got here!" Cobralan laughed. "Why not stay a little and I can treat you all to lunch? You must be starving after the long trip here!"

"Well, I am awfully famished," Dionna replied while stroking her stomach. "What have you got to eat?"

"That reminds me, where is Nosiop right now?" Batsputin asked, trying to listen out for Nosiop with his massive ears.

"No dice, everyone." Constricta replied. "He's been missing ever since the games began."

"I'm sure he'll come up at some point." Wobbla said with a loud, disgusting laugh.

"Ugh, charming as always, Wobbla." Ezlipsia groaned in irritation while using her parasol to protect herself from Wobbla's gross bodily fluids.

"Oh come now, let's have some fun this year!" Reximillian exclaimed as the Universal Lords prepared to sit down to lunch. But little did they know that Nosiop was still involved with the Contest of Champions, and he was going to make his presence known in a big way.

--

"I could've had a worthy ally in Spectre, but of course, Steven had to mess everything up with his dumb talk-no-jutsu or whatever!" Black Rutile grumbled as she walked deeper into the arena, not realizing how far she had gotten until it was too late. "What the? Where am I?"

"You must be Black Rutile, correct?" the voice of Prince Nosiop asked for Black Rutile as he and Pyth emerged from the shadows.

"Of course I am," Black Rutile answered while cautiously drawing her bowie knife. "What's it to you?"

"We've heard you also desired to upend your people's current status quo and turn them into what you think they should be." Pyth declared with a sneer.

"Wouldn't you know it, I think the same way," Nosiop said as he took Black Rutile's hand. "Come with me. We need to talk."

--

Now that Steven and Black Rutile are finally on Serpentes, things can really get going as dark secrets of the Slytherophidians and their connections to the Gems are unveiled while the Crystal Gems fight for survival in the Contest of Champions. But what does Nosiop have planned for Black Rutile, you may ask? You'll have to find out next time on Steven Universe: Snake Eyes!

[andrewmoocow]

Steven Universe Snake Eyes chapter 9: Let the Endgames Begin (originally published on October 23, 2023)

AN: We only have about three to four chapters left before I can finally close the book on Alternate Future once and for all and finally move onto other stories that I've left to collect dust for months to years on end. When last we left off, Squamata has been unleashed from his tomb and now plans to devastate the entire universe around him and beyond. Is there any way that the Crystal Gems can stop possibly their toughest foe yet? You'll just have to read on and find out as Alternate Future reaches its climax.

Synopsis: The race against time begins as the god of snakes Squamata breaks free from his prison and Steven rallies the royals & fighters to save reality.

Cast:

Zach Callison as Steven

Noël Wells as Black Rutile

Estelle as Garnet

Michaela Dietz as Amethyst

Deedee Magno-Hall as Pearl, Mega Black Pearl

Grace Rolek as Connie

Zach Steel as Ronaldo

Atticus Shaffer as Peedee

Jennifer Paz as Lapis

Shelby Rabara as Peridot

Uzo Aduba as Bismuth

Kimberly Brooks as Jasper

Lauren Ash as White Topaz

Patti LuPone as Yellow Diamond

Lisa Hannigan as Blue Diamond

Christine Ebersole as White Diamond

Aurelio Voltaire as King Cobralan Jormagundr

Shirley Millner as Queen Constricta Jormagundr

Ray Porter as Squamata

Samantha Newark as The Lapidarist

Jason Marsden as Prince Nosiop Jormagundr

Tim Curry as Velhallen Beo

Crispin Freeman as Mr. Manco

Sam Witwer as Torius Vosania

Anna Akana as Dionna of the Sands

Christopher Lloyd as Batsputin Vosania

Peter Stormare as Reximillian

Elizabeth Maxwell as Vigrid

James Earl Jones as Wobbla the Butt

Barrett Wilbert Weed as Ezlipsia

Anthony Stewart Head as Solaris Noctua

John Mulany as Flipso

AJ Michalka as Stevonnie

Ted Leo as Steg

Della Saba as Aquamarine

Charlyne Yi as Eyeball

Christine Pedi as Holly Blue Agate

Casey Lee Williams as Cat's Eye

Avi Roque as Cinnabar

Gina Torres as Andesine

Jinkx Monsoon as Emerald

Kari Wahlgren as Pyrope

Melissa Fahn as Demantoid

Awkwafina as Kyanite

--

As the Lapidarist meditated within her chambers, she suddenly heard a noise, followed by an evil, bellowing laugh. "I have turned hundreds upon thousands of worlds to dust in the name of darkness and devastation until I was robbed of my glory." Squamata roared from outside the castle. "I will stride across the bones of my enemies and bask in the glow of pure evil, for all of existence shall be mine to consume!"

"I knew this day would come." The Lapidarist said fearfully before she vanished from her sanctuary in a blinding flash of light. When she reappeared on Serpentes's surface, the already-panicking Slytherophidians were confused at the giant glowing humanoid's sudden appearance, making them wonder if she would team up with Squamata to destroy their world. "I can see you, Squamata!" the Lapidarist yelled for the snake creature to hear her. "I've been guarding this planet where you've been sealed for eons, and I will not let you destroy it or any other world!"

"Ah, Rebeugar, the last of the Lapidarists, we meet at last," Squamata replied with a dreadful sneer. "Who would've guessed we would be laid to rest on the same planet? No matter. I will finish what I started all those years ago and eliminate you, the sole survivor of my creators. First Serpentes, then the universe, and then the multiverse, and possibly beyond." Just as Squamata had made his threat, he suddenly received an electric shock to the face courtesy of Yellow Diamond. "WHAT?!"

"Die, monster!" Yellow called as she stood firmly against the God of Snakes with Blue and White Diamond beside her. "You do not belong in this world."

"It is not by my hand that I am free to smite the universe as I did in days long past." Squamata declared while presenting his heralds, Prince Nosiop, Pyth, Velhallen Beo, Mr. Manco, and Torius Vosania. "I was released from my confinements by mortals who wished to pay me tribute in exchange for assisting them with their own plans."

"That is correct, Squamata." Nosiop proclaimed. "Now, enough talk! Fight us, grand Diamonds, and die for your sins!" Squamata and his heralds charged at the Lapidarist and the Diamonds, with Squamata assuming a different form that transformed him into a shadowy mass of fog with eyes all over his body.

The god of snakes lunged at the Lapidarist with a hiss and bit her with his neck, trying to poison her with the venom in his fangs. However, he was stopped at the last moment when Stevonnie came to the Lapidarist's rescue by slashing off one of Squamata's fangs.

"What is this human doing here?!" Squamata roared as he looked down on Stevonnie and Mega Black Pearl standing up to his tremendous fury. "Wait, that is no mere human."

"A fusion of a human and a Gem? Inconceivable!" the Lapidarist agreed in alarm.

"Stay back, everyone; Mega Black Pearl and I got this covered!" Stevonnie declared before turning to the other fusion. "Ready, MBP?"

"Always ready for a fight!" Mega Black Pearl responded with a grin.

"How does everyone keep moving so fast?" Blue wondered as Squamata realized who he was up against.

"The scion of the Crystal Gems and the Diamonds, it seems," Squamata smirked while looking down at Stevonnie. "We meet face to face at last. Though, I did not expect you to come out to me as a fusion, and especially with a human." He then looked down at his heralds. "Velhallen, Torius, Manco, you know what to do. The rest of us shall take care of these Diamonds."

"It shall be done, my lord." Velhallen Beo declared as he clashed his sharpened claws with Stevonnie's sword while Torius and Manco sought revenge on the Black Pearl Brigade. "I have heard so many stories about you and the Crystal Gems, but never would I live to see the day I'd face one myself!"

"Who even are you?" Stevonnie asked before taking a big swing at Beo's chest. "I don't think I ever heard of you before, or most of the other heralds, for that matter."

"I am but a humble ex-Universal Lord who was robbed of my royal birthright by the confounded Batsputin Vosania!" Velhallen revealed his backstory to his fused opponent. "After being locked away by the Coalition of Galaxies for my numerous crimes, I discovered the awesome power of Squamata and figured that with him by my side, I could take back my rightful place as ruler of the Twilight Zone!"

"Not on our watch!" Mega Black Pearl declared before mightily swinging at Beo with her spear. High above the fusions' battle with the heralds, the Lapidarist used her phenomenal cosmic powers to keep Squamata at bay. At the same time, the Diamonds fought back against Nosiop and Pyth, now cosmically empowered by their exposure to the godlike snake.

"You will be returned quietly to where you belong, Squamata." Yellow declared. "We heard about how you crave nothing but death and destruction to every being with a pulse."

"Then again, you aren't so different, Gem creatures." Squamata retorted with a sneer. "You claim you're trying your best to change your ways, but I feel it isn't enough. Perhaps you could throw all that away and join me as my heralds."

"We will never join you!" Blue yelled while firing a blast of pure emotion to bring Squamata to his figurative knees. Still, Squamata felt absolutely nothing at all before tackling Blue to the ground and trying to bite her, only to get blasted away by White.

"Ah-say-into-pie, oppa-maybe-uppen-die!" Squamata then turned his attention to White and breathed fire in her face, causing her to fall over in shock. "You have no hope of defeating me in my current state! I will only grow stronger by the minute unless this ultimate fusion appears and stops me once and for all."

"Squamata is right; I cannot hold him forever!" the Lapidarist exclaimed. "We need to retreat now!"

"Yes, run while you still can, fools!" Nosiop exclaimed. "But you'll still be leaving us to run amok across this wretched world and the rest of the cosmos soon!"

"Wow, he really is kind of like me." The Steven part of Stevonnie muttered to themselves as they, Mega Black Pearl, the Lapidarist, and the Diamonds, made their escape, contemplating what Inner Steven had said to Steven earlier.

--

Steven and Connie were un-fused when they reached the castle, where the Crystal Gems awaited them. "So, couldn't beat Squamata, huh?" Amethyst asked. "Kind of figured something like that would happen."

"Is there any way we can stop Squamata now?" Pearl wondered. "If not even the Lapidarist and the Diamonds are enough to overpower him, then what chance do we have?" Suddenly, the heroes heard a familiar voice panting loudly as she raced towards the castle, and when they turned around, Black Rutile was standing at the front doors, acting like she had just run five dozen marathons on her way there.

"Yes, I'm not too late!" Black Rutile gasped as she finally reached the Jormagundrs' castle. "Help me, Crystal Gems, you're my only hope!"

"Enough talk, Black Rutile; we know it was you." Garnet coldly declared, completely ignoring Black Rutile's cries for help.

"No, please, you simply must hear me out!" Black Rutile yelled while raising her hands in complete sincerity. "Nosiop betrayed me and nearly sacrificed me to release Squamata! Please, you have to believe me!"

"Yeah, how about no?" Jasper growled angrily while snatching Black Rutile by the neck and glaring daggers at the Rutile. "We've had enough of your lies for too long now. Make one more, and you can bet we'll shatter you on the spot."

"Wait, guys, let's hear Black Rutile out." Steven tried to calm everyone down. "I know firsthand just how she really feels. Let me talk to her, and we'll all start working together ASAP." Connie then grabbed Steven by the shoulder. "Need anything, Connie?"

"Steven, I hate to break it to you, but I think it's time you gave up on her," Connie responded bluntly. "Black Rutile has lied and used us so many times for her own selfish gain, so it's obviously no secret all those insecurities she yelled about were probably another lie to play with your sympathy."

"Oh, for crying out-seriously?!" Black Rutile yelled furiously. "You pride yourself on accepting everyone, even the ones you don't understand, yet I'm the outlier here?! I am in legitimate distress here, and you're just turning away from me just like that?!"

"Maybe come to us when you feel some form of remorse for your actions, you murder drone!" Peridot barked before turning away with her nose pointed to the ceiling. "Bismuth, Lapis, to me, please."

"Yeah, not sure how we can forgive you after you tried making me one of your team." Lapis added with a disdainful shrug before following Peridot.

"Ugh, once a corrupt uppercrust, always a corrupt uppercrust." Bismuth scoffed while turning to walk alongside her two best friends.

"White Topaz, you can believe me, right?" Black Rutile said to her former bodyguard. "You've been at my side for years. Surely, you can tell them I'm right!"

"Okay, I'm just going to give it to you straight." White Topaz declared. "Look, BR, I know you seem like you want the Crystal Gems to forgive you for your sins, but we all think you're a lost cause. You obviously made up your mind. Why don't you just cut your losses and get outta here for your own safety?"

"You wretched parasites!" Black Rutile shrieked as all the Crystal Gems left her alone in the castle. "If I did this earlier, I'd make you pay for showing me no sympathy!" But alas, Black Rutile's archenemies chose to ignore her as they walked away, the only one continuing to acknowledge her being Steven, who simply turned to Black Rutile with a disappointed sigh as if he knew that Black Rutile was being honest, but their past experiences together wanted to prove him otherwise.

Once again, Black Rutile was left with only crushing loneliness to keep her company. Her former minions had abandoned her to join the Crystal Gems for the sake of survival; Nosiop almost had her killed, and now, when she desperately needed help the most, the only ones who could refuse to believe her like she was a human boy crying wolf. All the mournful Rutile could do now was drop to her knees, gaze at her hands, and mutter to herself, "I'm the lowest of the low."

--

Outside the castle, the Universal Lords, Solaris Noctua, and a very reluctant Flipso stood together as they examined Squamata's rampage on Serpentes. Cobralan sighed in dismay as he looked down at his tail while contemplating Greg's critique of his parenting, feeling that for a human, he had every right to point out how the king's ignorance would lead to his son releasing an ancient god of destruction in a bid to prove that the Slytherophidians were meant to be conquerors. Perhaps if Nosiop were to survive this ordeal, father and son would have a long, hard chat with each other.

"I still can't believe it." Solaris declared in awe of the god of snakes. "Squamata has returned. I know my powers haven't been what they used to be ever since I graduated from Universal Lord to cosmic librarian, but even I believe our combined strength might be enough to at least knock him down for a spell."

"You're kidding me, aren't you, Larry?!" Flipso yelled in outrage. "That's Squamata, the god of snakes, devourer of worlds, bringer of death, the chaos bringer, the master of darkness, and wrecker of all our collective shit! I think it's time that we get on out of here; I know a great empty void a few dimensions down we can hide in until this all blows over!"

"Oh no, you don't, Flippy!" Dionna of the Sands exclaimed while grabbing the cosmic jester by his tiny ankle. "You're fighting with us, whether you like it or not!"

"Enough arguing, you two, allow me to take this." Wobbla the Butt declared as he slithered out of his dais and took a deep breath before bellowing, "IMMA FIRIN' MY LASER!" and spewing out a brightly colored laser beam from his mouth that struck Squamata in the eye.

"WHO DARES?!" Squamata roared while turning to face the Universal Lords, who all stood together as one united army to face the destroyer. "The Universal Lords! Your powers are indeed beyond comprehension, but they shall not be enough to face me!"

"We can try." Ezlipsia replied before letting out a mighty hoot that caused darkness to fall on her, which she condensed into a massive array of familiars she ordered to assault Squamata's heralds. Meanwhile, Vigrid transformed into a new form resembling that of a harpy as she soared through the air and trapped Velhallen Beo in a headlock.

"Ah, Vigrid, it's been too long since we last saw each other, my love," Beo said lecherously to Vigrid, making the witch-like Universal Lord retch in disgust.

"I thought what we had was just a one-time fling!" Vigrid exclaimed. "I never knew you still had feelings for me!"

"So, it seems we are fated to face each other again, my brother," Torius said to Batsputin as the two prepared for battle. "Don't think this shall be like our last battle when you robbed me of my throne!"

"It seems we have no other choice, especially since you have aligned yourself with Squamata," Batsputin said before the brothers engaged in a rematch. Torius's improved cybernetics gave him an edge in battle.

"For our people, for our planets, let us fight on!" Dionna cried as she and her fellow Amazonian warriors formed an army to face off against the snake soldiers under Mr. Manco's control.

"To me, Flipso!" Solaris commanded before casting a spell to assist Vigrid in battle.

"Fine, but I'm only holding back to make things fair," Flipso said before snapping his fingers and making an army tank appear. "Besides, bringing in someone as powerful as me against that guy would be ridiculously unfair."

Reximillian let out a beastly roar as he began stomping all over snake guards and robot drones. "Ugh, this is such a waste of my time."

"Son, I know you're still in there." Cobralan tried to reach out to Nosiop during the clash between Squamata's heralds and the Universal Lords. "Please, my son, drop your weapon and allow me to be a better parent to you."

"Oh, so now you finally decide to be a father!" Nosiop yelled angrily. "Where was this apology when I needed it after all the times you ignored my ideas?!"

"Because they were going against our way of life!" Cobralan replied. "We do not conquer; we prefer peace with other species, barring the occasional accidental extinction, and I want it to stay that way. Perhaps if you walked a mile in my scales, maybe we can finally see things eye to eye."

"I swear, this is just Copper 9 all over again!" Nosiop complained. "I wanted to conquer that robot-infested wasteland because I thought they would make good servants for us, but you instead signed that Lerdwichagul Treaty to ensure we wouldn't turn them into slaves!"

"Now, son, no need to get all huffy just because you're not getting what you want." Constricta stepped in between her husband and son. "It's like some species say, you win some, you lose some. Do you want this to end up like the jockstrap incident? Hopefully, we can give Boa a break from digging all the holes this time."

"You must always make things so difficult, your Highnesses," Pyth said glowingly. "I've served your family for generations, hoping that Squamata would give our people the wake-up call they needed, and it turns out Nosiop wanted the same thing to the point where I'm more like a father to him now. Your son has always been like this. I just gave him the push he needed."

"If that must be the case," Cobralan said bravely while drawing his sword. "then I cannot let you corrupt my family any further." Pyth did the same as his former king and drew out a sword as well before the two began to clash.

--

"Man, the Universal Lords ain't no one's fool!" Amethyst said in amazement as the Lords went to war with Squamata. "Maybe we should go out there and help!"

"Not yet, Amethyst," Garnet replied firmly. "Once we can find an opening, then we can strike. Otherwise, we need to work on finding the ultimate fusion."

"Ooh, I know just the one!" White Topaz said eagerly before taking Jasper's hand and causing the two to fuse into Orange Moonstone.

"Calm down, guys, I'm not sure if that's the one," Pearl said to Orange Moonstone's disappointment as she un-fused back into Jasper and White Topaz. "Steven, why don't you go review fusing with your human friends to see if they can help?"

"Okay," Steven agreed. "but first, I think someone wants to talk to us." The Crystal Gems turned around to find the Rutile Rebels standing behind them, and they instinctively summoned their weapons to prepare for a fight.

"Hold on, everyone, no need to fight!" Aquamarine exclaimed as she stepped up in front of the Rebels. "We just have a little problem that needs solving."

"And what makes you think we'll believe you this time?" Connie growled while pointing her sword at the tiny blue Gem, who simply just held out her hand.

"Let's make a deal." Aquamarine declared. "We have reached a bit of a situation here."

"Situation is putting this lightly." Eyeball added. "Black Rutile has been working with Prince Nosiop to unleash Squamata, and if we don't work together, it will mean the end of the entire universe, including the both of us!"

"And we know this because Black Rutile straight up told us how she was plotting to use the Lapidarist to turn every Gem into her mindless slaves so that Nosiop can use them as an army!" Holly Blue stated. "Frankly, that was a terrible idea on her part."

"So we say this again." Cat's Eye concluded the Rebels' statement. "Let us make a deal. If you help us stop Squamata and Black Rutile, we'll return peacefully to Little Homeworld and coexist with you all in harmony." Cat put on big puppy dog eyes to emphasize that she was serious while holding her hat in her hands. "Pwetty pwease?!"

"You just had to whip out the puppy dog eyes." Bismuth sighed in annoyance. "You sure you won't just end up stabbing us in the back before flying off to plot your revenge, twirling your mustaches and saying "MWA-HA-HA" along the way?"

"No, we're being perfectly honest here!" Cinnabar exclaimed defensively. "Black Rutile almost threw us out before we decided to quit, and now we feel that if we have to survive and live another day, we have no choice but to join you in saving the universe from destruction. Now, will you accept us or not?"

"Please say yes, we're desperate." Andesine urged the Gems through gritted teeth.

"Okay, but only if you promise not to go back on your word." Garnet obliged and reluctantly shook Aquamarine's hand.

"Thank you for being so reasonable." Aquamarine sighed in relief. "You are a credit to your team." Garnet had no idea how to respond to that statement. "I'm just being nice."

"We all need to be nice if we must live." Pyrope proclaimed. "Now, I know it will be tough having to live with your greatest enemies now, suddenly acting all chummy and all."

"While I would like to hear you bluster all day about how we can make a change," Demantoid interrupted her fellow Garnet. "we literally have tons of different things to do, like solving our little Squamata problem."

"Yes, we'll need to discuss that," Emerald added. "Anyone got any ideas?"

"I have one!" Kyanite exclaimed. "My idea is that we sit Squamata down, look him dead in the eye, and tell him "Don't eat our planet." Everyone just stared at Kyanite in dead silence. "Trust me, he'd have to be awfully evil if it didn't work, and I'm not gonna lie, I like the cut of his jib."

"Sometimes I wonder why you still keep her around, Cinnabar." Andesine groaned to Cinnabar in disgust.

"She may not be competent, but she gets me results." Cinnabar proclaimed in her bodyguard's defense, causing Dalmatian Jasper, Zoisite, Pyrite, and Bloodstone to nod in agreement.

--

"So, what do you all think?" Steg, the fusion of Steven and Greg, asked while showing off his powers for the other humans. "I know it's not much, but it's the symbol of one heck of a father-son duo!"

"How big is that hair?!" Lars gasped while pointing at Steg's big pompadour. "Do you think maybe someone's compensating for something?" he whispered to Peedee, who just frowned in annoyance. "Come on! I was just making a joke!"

"Okay, anyone else wanna fuse with Steven?" Steg offered. "How about you, Lars? I wonder what your powers would do."

"Hey, before we review any more fusions, can I talk with Steven for a bit?" Peedee asked. "Recent events, particularly news about his family, have gotten me thinking about things."

"Wait, you don't mean!" Ronaldo gasped at his little brother while Steg un-fused. "Oooohhhhh noooooo."

"What are you guys talking about?" Steven asked awkwardly before the Frymans took him away from Greg, Connie, and Lars.

"So, you know how it was mostly just us and our dad running the fry shop back on Earth?" Peedee stated. "Well, I'm sure there's one question that must've been on the back of your mind."

"Is this about your mother?" Steven asked. "Come to think of it, while I did notice she was gone, I never really bothered to ask. What happened to her?"

"Yeah, I think it's time we finally came out," Peedee replied morosely. "She wasn't into the frying business like we were. She was more of the detective kind, so you can guess where Ronaldo got his love for mysteries from."

"And also kind of like me, she gets really absorbed in her work to the point where she starts isolating herself from others," Ronaldo replied. "But unlike me, it became a serious problem, and she would argue with Dad whenever she worked long nights. And then, one day, she just kind of vanished. I'm not even sure where she is right now. She didn't even say goodbye!"

"Wow, I guess I have a bit more in common with you guys than I thought," Steven said in realization before he started laughing. "Let's just hope she didn't run off to start a rebellion or something!"

"Yeah, like your mom!" Ronaldo started laughing as well, and then Peedee as well. At first, Steven thought that he couldn't relate much to other human beings due to his half-Gem upbringing, but now, he realized that there were people much closer to him than he realized. And he couldn't be happier.

--

"I must restore my strength." The Lapidarist muttered to herself as she healed her injuries sustained from the fight against Squamata. Rebeugar needed that ultimate fusion as soon as possible and couldn't be kept waiting. However, she soon heard a set of footsteps approaching her. "Who is there?"

It was Black Rutile, who had come to see the Lapidarist just as she had planned. This could be it, her chance to finally get the revenge on the Crystal Gems she had craved for so long by forcibly rejuvenating all Gems and turning them into her unstoppable army, thus forcing Garnet, Amethyst, and Pearl to learn how much they made her suffer by forcing them to become her servants instead of the other way around. But instead, she had one simple question to ask.

"Lapidarist, my name is Black Rutile." Black Rutile introduced herself to the foremother of all Gemkind. "And I've been dealing with a little crisis lately. For the past couple of months or so, I've been coping with my loss of identity. I've been so bent on revenge on the Crystal Gems for years now that I've practically built my entire life around it. Yet now, without an army, any allies, or even enemies to take me seriously, I'm not even sure if I still have a purpose in the universe. Please tell me, grand Lapidarist, is it possible for me to find a new purpose now that Steven has stripped me of my old one?"

The Lapidarist knelt idly as she processed Black Rutile's question, meditating in place while hovering just a few inches off the ground. Then, she finally spoke. "Your time will come soon, Black Rutile." The Lapidarist ominously declared. "Your true destiny simply won't be realized until you are at peace. But for now, I believe certain individuals need your help."

The Lapidarist then conjured up a holographic image of Steven leading not just the Crystal Gems, the royal family of Serpentes, the Universal Lords, and the various Contest of Champions fighters into battle against Squamata but also the now former Rutile Rebels. And alongside Steven's motley army, standing right alongside the boy, in fact, was Black Rutile.

--

Yeah, as you can probably guess, this is where Black Rutile's redemption arc finally begins! But she won't just need Steven to forgive her because he's got enough issues as is, what she needs is to forgive herself for forcing her to become the Gem she is today and keep moving forward to a brighter tomorrow. How can Black Rutile process this? Will everyone else accept this madman's change of heart? Will Black Rutile finally say Connie's last name properly? All this and more will be answered in the coming chapters, same Gem time, same Gem channel!

[andrewmoocow]

The Black Pearl Brigade chapter 13: Lords of the Universe

AN: Three chapters left until the end. Only one regular chapter to go then the big two-part finale, afterwards we'll take a break so I can start readying the remainder of this universe, and I've already been writing outlines for Little Homeworld Life's first season lately. But as for Black Pearl Brigade, we finally get a chance to shine some light on the backstory of one of our main villains so that we may give him a proper send-off in the next episode. That's right, Torius Vosania takes the stage once again!

Synopsis: Batsputin, one of the Universal Lords, finds his power over his corner of the universe being challenged by Cinnabar.

Cast:

Deedee Magno-Hall as The Black Pearl Brigade

Avi Roque as Cinnabar

Zehra Fazal as Zoisite

Sam Witwer as Torius Vosania

Kathleen Barr as Púrén

Featuring Christopher Lloyd as Batsputin Vosania

With Anna Akana as Dionna of the Sands

Peter Stormare as Reximillian

Elizabeth Maxwell as Vigrid

James Earl Jones as Wobbla the Butt

Barrett Wilbert Weed as Ezlipsia

And William Houston as Mr. Bartok

--

The Diamonds aren't the only ones with absolute control over the universe. Though they only lay claim to 36.3% of the known universe compared to the Diamond Authority's 63.7%, the Universal Lords' power was infamous the cosmos over.

Each of them had control over their own galaxies. Dionna of the Sands and her army of warrior women claimed mainly desert and paradise planets in the Bogon Galaxy and Sky Canopy Domain. The dinosaur-like Reximillian oversaw the Aeron Galaxy, the Pegasus Galaxy, the Ford Galaxy, and the Seraphia Galaxy. Vigrid, a witch-like Universal Lord, ruled over her domain known throughout the galactic communities as the Upside Down, which also happened to be rich in Illudium Q-36. The sluggish crime lord Wobbla the Butt ruled his planets from the spaceport known as Hellknight's Lot, and some of his favorites included the Makyo Star System, Melmac, Spira, and Cepheus-18. Finally, the princess of Umbran Ezlipsia, the young ruler of Aldebaran, inherited her parents' massive empire at the age of 20 and has guarded such planets as Thra, Zeenu, Shuggazoom, and Petropia.

Many have risen and fallen over eons of the Universal Lords' existence, but Cinnabar had planned to put an end to one in particular. And her partner Torius Vosania knew just the one.

--

"This is the one you want?" Cinnabar asked Torius while they examined a hologram of a male humanoid with two sets of massive wings, one pair beneath his arms and the other serving as wings. He looked like a near-dead-ringer for Torius, minus the extensive cybernetic enhancements he applied to himself.

"Yes, that's him." Torius hissed eagerly, rubbing his hands together at the image. "I've been waiting for ages to get revenge, brother."

"So, that's your brother, huh?" Zoisite asked while reclining against a door. "I totally called it, Bloodstone owes me big time."

"Well, if you were so sure about it, then why don't you go down and bring us his head?" Cinnabar asked the one half of her top assassin duo. "I'd get DJ to come along, but she's already occupied with surveillance on the other Lords.

"I won't let you down, Cinnabar." Zoisite saluted while pulling her naginata from her gem and leaving the two criminals alone.

"Soon, Batsputin, your kingdom will finally be mine!" Torius howled loudly. "Just as it was meant to be so many decades ago."

--

Since his youth, Batsputin Vosania ruled over his native planet of Cavenousya in the Twilight Zone, which served as the capital for his empire as a Universal Lord. However, all was not well in his palace. There were rumblings about a possible assassination on the horizon, and the planet's great leader found himself the most stressed out after learning from inside sources plotting the hit on him.

"Can it be? My brother still wants vengeance for me taking the throne?" Batsputin fretted over what his brother could want with him while pacing around his private quarters. "Great Scott, I need to do something about this before it's too late!"

"My lord, is something wrong?" the Vosania family's majordomo, Mr. Bartok, asked Batsputin.

"Yes, it is brother Torius." Batsputin declared fearfully. "He's still calling for my head, but this time he has backup. It's a Gem he's aligned interests with that is currently wanted for crimes against the Gem Homeworld. Who knows what they could do together, Mr. Bartok?"

"Might I suggest an idea?" Mr. Bartok replied. "On the topic of Gems, I hear that there is this band of Pearl mercenaries who regularly combat the forces of this criminal." He then presented a holographic gallery of the Black Pearl Brigade's recent adventures, such as their encounters with Sylvia Spectre and their protection of Budiansky-84. "The way I see it, it should take a Gem to know a Gem. Plus, it says they take jobs through the Diamonds being called by potential clients."

"I suppose if we have no other choice, we must hire the Pearls." Batsputin agreed with his right hand. "I shall make arrangements, posthaste!" Batsputin turned and flew deeper into his stalactite-shaped castle to contact the Diamonds, while Mr. Bartok stayed behind to enact some plans of his own.

"Batsputin is planning to contact the Pearls, young Torius." Bartok said over a communicator to Torius. "Those five have no idea what they'll be getting into."

"Excellent, Bartok, I always knew you were the only one back home I could still count on." Torius declared.

"I always did have faith in your abilities, my boy." Bartok replied warmly, yet condescendingly at the same time. "Now, which of your cronies has been sent out to perform the deed?"

"A Gem assassin named Zoisite is on her way to Cavenousya." Torius responded. "Be sure to make her feel welcome when she arrives. Understand?"

"I surely will, my child. Over and out." Bartok nodded and ended his call before smiling to himself. "The fools have yet to realize that I have plans of my own."

--

The Servant exited hyperspeed into the Twilight Zone and landed in Cavenousya mere minutes after the Pearls had received Batsputin's call for help. As is natural for the Vosania family's species, the planet was in a state of eternal night with Victorian gothic architecture as far as the eye could see, all contained within caves that dotted the world's surface.

"So glad we could finally reach the Twilight Zone." IQ stated. "The architecture and ecosystem always fascinated me so much."

"Well, glad you can finally get a chance to check everything out after Sylvia interrupted our trip," Cap replied with an arm around her subordinate. "But we have work to do. We've been hired by one of the Universal Lords this time."

"I still can't believe it either, a Universal Lord wanting our help!" Pony excitedly reiterated. "And not just that, but one of the big ones, the cream of the crop, the biggest of them-"

"Okay, Pony, settle down." Braids ordered Pony with a finger to the other Pearl's mouth. "No need to get all excited."

"I wouldn't blame her, though. Batsputin is among the most powerful Universal Lords." Tails replied. "We must treat him with the utmost respect to stay on his good side."

"Precisely, now let's get moving." Cap nodded to Tails as she led the Pearls to Batsputin's castle, with Sculder following behind in case any other assassins were coming for their heads. Eventually, they finally reached the Universal Lord's palace, hanging from the ceiling like a large stalactite with small bat-like creatures circling around it that picked up the visitors and flew them straight through the nearest window, where Batsputin awaited them.

"Ah, the Black Pearl Brigade, I see." Batsputin grinned at the arriving Pearls. "Allow me to introduce myself. I am Batsputin, lord of the Twilight Zone and current head of the Vosania dynasty. I am pleased that you received my summons."

"It is a pleasure to meet you as well, Lord Batsputin." Cap bowed with her fellow Pearls and their robot companion. "We happen to be quite familiar with the one who ordered the hit on you, Torius Vosania."

"Yes indeed, my brother." Batsputin declared sorrowfully. "He always was very ambitious, conceited, and childish, but he also found it very easy to get jealous of others, me included. After I inherited our parents' throne, Torius went mad and tried to kill me to take what he thought was rightfully his, but that was when everything went horribly wrong."

--

"Please, Torius, it didn't have to be this way!" a younger Batsputin called out to a younger, horribly scarred Torius in the middle of an epic battle to the death for the right to be called the ruler of Cavenousya. "Just let me help you, and we can rule the Twilight Zone together!"

"I HATE YOU!" Torius shrieked angrily. "You were always better than me! Everyone loved saying you were better than me!"

"That's not true!" Batsputin objected to his younger brother's claims. "Everyone may say I am more fit to be a leader, but you Torius, your charisma, and tactics are second to none!" He then extended a winged hand to his injured sibling. "Just take my hand. I know you still have a place in my kingdom."

However, Torius instead slapped Batsputin's hand away and let out a feral hiss before he tried flying away. Unfortunately, the younger Vosania sibling was too horribly injured to keep going, and he dropped out of the sky, presumably to his death.

Disgusted at himself for not being able to save Torius while grieving his brother's demise, Batsputin began quietly shedding tears as he turned away from where he last saw his younger brother and started walking back to their home, where he would soon rule for the rest of his days.

However, that was not the last the brothers would see of each other. Torius lay at the canyon where he and Batsputin fought, barely clinging onto his life and croaking his brother's name. "Batsputin! Batsputin!"

"Something the matter, my child?" Mr. Bartok asked as he suddenly stood by Torius's side and helped the young prince up. "My, you took quite a beating."

"Indeed." Torius replied, hacking up blood and phlegm. "Please, Bartok, help me!"

"Oh, I most certainly will." The Vosanias' majordomo replied evilly as he guided the brutalized prince into the shadows. "But you'll have to bear with me for a bit. The process will be most painful, but certainly worth it."

--

Elsewhere in the castle, Mr. Bartok snuck into a hidden room behind a bookcase, where Zoisite happened to be waiting for him on the other side. "Ah, you must be the assassin Torius had called for."

"And you must be the majordomo of the Vosania family." Zoisite replied. "Bartok, was it?"

"You are correct, Gem." Bartok nodded before taking in the bounty hunter's form. "My, such delicate features, yet you are so strong at the same time." He said while creepily stroking Zoisite's arm. "Those Kindergartens are most certainly advanced."

"Okay, creep." Zoisite replied, slapping Bartok's hands away from her body and pulling out her naginata. "Now, I need this assassination to be done clean and quick, so I don't need anyone trying to get in the way. That includes you."

"I, what?" Bartok stuttered as his eyes widened in fear.

"I've also heard that you always had a bit of a lust for power yourself, and I cannot allow you to interfere." Zoisite continued before she plunged her naginata deep into Bartok's torso and made him topple over, looking like he was just about to die. "Hopefully, whoever finds you won't find out what really caused all this."

As Zoisite left to perform her duties, Bartok was left to eventually die from his grievous wounds, but little did the green and red Gem know that this majordomo wouldn't give up easily. Bartok struggled to get up while covering his stab wound, and with a vengeful sneer, he snuck into a hidden room within the hidden room to plan his next move.

--

As soon as the Pearls received the information they needed for their mission, they took it upon themselves to serve as Batsputin's bodyguards for all of his duties, defending him while greeting civilians on the streets and attending to the servants' needs, and taking care of his own. But there was one activity of Batsputin's that they found the most interesting.

Later that day, or at least that's what they thought since it was always night, Batsputin entered a grand meeting hall to meet with what the Pearls believed to be some of the other Universal Lords. Sitting closest to Batsputin was a tall, tan-skinned, humanoid woman who seemed like the perfect mix of feminine beauty and might while clad in an armored toga. Next to her was a massive dinosaur dressed in a sharp tuxedo and bowler hat, holding a cigar in one of his three-fingered hands.

Across from the pair was another humanoid female sporting a pair of glasses, a skintight bodysuit with a robe resembling butterfly wings hanging around her shoulders, pointed ears, a pair of horn-rimmed glasses, and a massive witch's hat. Next to her was a gigantic and very unsightly looking slug monster with ape-like features whose body gave off a disgusting discharge, much to the annoyance of his fellow Lords. He was accompanied by a furry goblin, and an advisor with tentacles hanging off his head. Finally, an owl-like young woman dressed in regal gothic attire paid no mind to the other Lords and spent more time gazing at her mobile device than joining in on the conversation.

"Ah, my friends." Batsputin greeted the Universal Lords happily. "I was so wrapped up in the possibility of assassination; I forgot I invited you all here to place bets!"

"Yes, yes, your brother still wants your head." Dionna of the Sands snarked. "So anyways, who do you think shall win this year's gladiator games?"

"Oh, I'm personally betting on Rigby Starglow!" Reximillian declared. "I'm a huge fan of his music, so I'm kinda biased."

"Personally, my credits are on S-L1M3," Vigrid replied. "Slime-like creature with cybernetic enhancements that update themselves with every time their user is defeated to adapt to their opponents' every move. I consider it a safe bet."

"Me, personally, I'm kind of split between Lady Imagineer and Earthos." Wobbla the Butt stated, laughing while coughing up phlegm that began making a mess and forcing Batsputin's servants to clean it up. "I mean, one can fly, sync up with whoever they touch, and bring their thoughts to reality! But the other can bend the earth beneath him to his will and has super strength!" He let out another laugh, causing more disgusting bodily fluids to fly out of his mouth. "Okay, maybe Lady Imagineer will win. What do you think Ezlipsia?"

"Well, for one, stop drooling all over my phone." Ezlipsia growled while wiping some of Wobbla's fluids off her screen. "And second, I'm personally betting on one of the Metals to win." This bet caused the Pearls to look at the princess of the night in shock because last they remember, the Metals were living peacefully on Quarron. What could have possibly happened to them, and how? "Their military experience definitely tells me why the Snake People abducted them for their games."

Before any of the Pearls could speak up, a door quietly opened in the far distance, and a familiar silhouette emerged.

"Hey, is that who I think it is?" Cap whispered to her comrades.

"Zoisite!" Braids answered with a fist to her palm. "And it seems she's alone this time."

"Thankfully, we're a little more prepared." Tails stated and aimed her rifle at Zoisite's shadow. She then fired, causing a brief uproar among the Universal Lords as they glared straight at the Pearls. "Should've used a silencer!"

"What is the meaning of this?!" Reximillian roared while slamming his tail on the table.

"The assassin is here; everybody run!" Cap exclaimed before Zoisite appeared from behind and put her in a full nelson. "You!"

"My my, six of the seven Universal Lords all in one place!" Zoisite grinned eagerly. "All the more to slaughter and bring to Cinnabar!"

"We'll see about that!" Dionna exclaimed and unsheathed her sword to face Zoisite in combat, causing Vigrid to summon a staff with an owl at the end of it that she used to create circles casting offense spells, while Rexmillian gnashed his rows of massive teeth.

"Batsputin, get to safety now!" Pony commanded the king of Cavenousya before he was abruptly killed by Zoisite, stabbing him to death with her naginata. "No!"

"Batsputin is down, I repeat, Batsputin is down!" Zoisite spoke to Torius through her communicator. "And it seems the Pearls are here too!"

"The Pearls?! They must've been hired to protect him!" Torius screeched on the other end. "No matter, they have failed! Now all that's left is to reclaim my rightful throne!"

"I wouldn't be so sure of that." Another Cavenousyan who looked just like Batsputin declared as he appeared and tossed his own corpse away, much to everyone's shock. "What, did I forget to tell you that I have dozens of body doubles in case something like this happened?"

"Wait, then where is he?!" Zoisite yelled before killing that body double in response, just as a third one emerged from the shadows. "Oh no, they're multiplying!"

"Another thing you should know is that this castle has more secret tunnels than you can shake a stick at!" the third doppelganger bragged with a laugh, only to be cut short by a naginata to the head.

"Then it looks like I'll have to slaughter my way through all of you till I find the real deal!" Zoisite declared before she kicked down the door to the grand hall and killed a fourth Batsputin double that was already about to enter.

As the Gem assassin kept slaughtering body doubles, the Pearls, now with the knowledge of where the real Batsputin was, now needed to find him before either Zoisite or Torius did. "We need to find a way into those secret tunnels!" Cap exclaimed before she turned to the Universal Lords. "Do any of you know where we can find them?"

"Glad you asked." Ezlipsia stated and knocked on a nearby wall, making a part of it cave in and reveal a mysterious hallway lined with torches behind it. "I've explored these passages myself when I was a young girl, so I definitely know which ones are located."

"Thanks, you have all been a big help." IQ stated as the Pearls and Sculder stepped into the hidden hall searching for Batsputin.

"Best of luck to you all!" Reximillian called to the Pearls before turning to the other Universal Lords. "Torius Vosania's forces should be nearing Cavenousya any moment. Are you willing to fight?"

"Anything for a fellow Lord." Vigrid stated.

"Well, I got nothing better to do today." Wobbla smirked while putting a long smoking pipe to his mouth.

"If he wants to conquer the Twilight Zone, he'll have to go through us first!" Dionna exclaimed, unsheathing her sword.

"Guess I have no other choice." Ezlipsia obliged, brandishing a set of knives in the shape of fans. "Come now, to battle!"

--

Meanwhile, the Pearls trekked through the secret passage Ezlipsia pointed them towards, Cap leading the way with a torch in hand. "Your highness, where are you?!"

"Here, Batty, Batty, Batty!" Pony hollered, and her echoes bounced around the hall. "Dang, nothing!"

"I suggest we must perform the act of splitting up to search for clues!" Braids declared. "Cap, you and Pony go this way! Tails and IQ shall go that way, and I'll go with Sculder!"

"How can we split up? We're in a narrow hallway!" Tails exclaimed, her declaration echoing as well. "I'm sure he's here somewhere!"

"You rang?" Batsputin's voice echoed too, spooking the Pearls. "Come closer, I'm at the end of the hall!" The Pearls moved further down the hallway into a large room where Batsputin was awaiting them, surrounded by paintings of a younger Batsputin engaging in battle with a man in green and red armor with a purple cape. "Ah, you made it, my friends! Bet you didn't expect to see me here, eh?"

"I don't think we ever heard about this place before, either." Cap replied while gazing at the paintings surrounding them. "Who's the other guy supposed to be?"

"That is Velhallen Beo, a rival Universal Lord from ages ago." Batsputin explained. "He and I went to war for control of this galaxy many years ago in what would be called the Battle of the Night. He was a very confident warrior with an army of thousands, but I came out on top in the end."

"Interesting." IQ muttered while recording the data on an electronic notepad. "Is there any way we can see Mr. Beo now?"

"I don't know. Haven't seen him in ages." Batsputin replied with a shrug. "But that's beside the point. Where is that assassin now?"

"You mean Zoisite?" Braids responded. "She's busy killing her way through all those body doubles we just learned you have."

"Oh, the body doubles." Batsputin realized. "Don't worry; I have tons more where they came from. I GOT DOZENS MORE FROZEN TODAY!"

"And hopefully, you'll be needing all of them to mourn you." A familiar voice declared as Mr. Bartok emerged from the shadows, now wearing similar cybernetics to Torius to cover up his earlier stab wound. "Surprise, your highness. Happy to see me?"

"Mr. Bartok, what has happened to you?!" Batsputin exclaimed at the sight of his majordomo. "What's with the cybernetics, you duncebucket?"

"Oh, I just met with a certain Zoisite in league with your brother, only for her to try and kill me because I have my plans for conquering this world." Bartok revealed. "I've been planning this for ages, pitting you and Torius against each other in the hopes that you'd get each other killed and leave me to take the throne! But when Torius managed to survive the encounter, I had to change plans."

"So it was all because of you Torius has been chasing us?!" Cap exclaimed while brandishing her spear to threaten Mr. Bartok. "Sculder, shoot him!" Sculder did as it commanded and fired its arm cannon at Bartok, but nothing seemed to have hit him. Bartok seemed invincible.

"Your pathetic machinery can't do anything against me." Bartok bragged. "I suggest you surrender yourselves now, Pearls. I think you would make a perfect harem for me."

"Over our dead bodies, Bart!" Braids yelled and attempted to chop Bartok down with her ax, but he quickly dodged the swipe and flew up to the ceiling. "Curses!"

"And I'm not the only one you should be worried about." Bartok smirked before the ceiling suddenly caved in, and Torius swooped down like a feral predator, gunning straight for his older brother, and looking like he was about to bite Batsputin's head off.

"Finally, brother, we meet again at last!" Torius howled eagerly. "And now, to settle our score!"

"Not today Torius!" Batsputin yelled back, and together, the two brothers flew away from the chamber as they began wrestling each other in the sky, while Bartok followed behind.

"We need to follow them and save Batsputin!" IQ exclaimed. "Everyone to the Servant!"

--

The battle between the brothers raged on in the air as the other Universal Lords worked together to fight off Torius and Cinnabar's forces, leaving Cavenousya in a state of crisis as the civilians ran for shelter and their fearless leader fought for his life.

"You may have beaten me the first time, but you can't win this time!" Torius yelled while firing lasers from his cyborg thorax at Batsputin. "All my life, you've done nothing but outshine me!"

"But you don't understand, it doesn't have to be this way!" Batsputin exclaimed. "Bartok has been playing us all along just to seize power for himself!"

"From my point of view, you've been playing us all along!" Torius retorted before tangling Batsputin in his ears and tossing him through the castle just as the Servant began firing at him. "You!"

"Púrén, all weapons on Torius!" Cap commanded the ship's AI.

"Affirmative!" Púrén exclaimed and kept attacking Torius, even when he leaped at the spaceship and began clawing at its body. "Oh, come on!"

"Don't worry, I got you!" Batsputin tried to save his bodyguards from harm, only to be held back by Mr. Bartok latching onto his ears. "Hands off me, Bartok!"

"Never! Once I have you and Torius out of the way, Cavenousya shall be mine to rule!" Bartok yelled while brandishing a dagger to finish the job once and for all. However, this was not meant to be. Zoisite shot the dagger out of Bartok's hands with a rifle and was ready to do the same to Bartok. "Oh great, I forgot about you for a second."

"As soon as I heard what happened, I just had to stop my rampage to check this out." Zoisite declared. "Regardless, I just can't leave a job unfinished." She then quickly sniped Bartok in the head, sealing his doom as the insidious majordomo lost his grip on Batsputin's ears, and his corpse fell to the ground. "Now that he's out of the way, onto you, your highness."

"No, he is mine to kill!" Torius yelled defiantly. "I should be the only one to take the throne!"

"What made you think we were going to take over your planet to begin with?" Zoisite asked while preparing to kill both brothers.

"Quick, someone stop her!" Batsputin cried out, forcing the Pearls to take action immediately and direct their fire towards Zoisite, who nimbly dodged every attack from the Servant while launching from her rifle every chance she got. However, one wrong move was what finally ended the battle.

In a hurry, Zoisite aimed her rifle and accidentally fired straight through Torius's ear, causing him to lose airtime and start falling through the sky. "NO! NOOOO!"

"Wait, how did that happen?!" Zoisite exclaimed before she realized what she had done. "I have to get out of here!"

"Exactly! Strategic retreat, everyone!" Torius called for his forces. "We must evacuate, immediately!" On command, one of Torius's minions flew in on his ship and beamed the crime lord aboard before flying off with the rest of his armada.

"Well, chalk that one up to another bit of an anticlimax." Cap declared as the last of the Vosania Syndicate's armada left Cavenousya. "But regardless, another planet saved!"

"Yes, we give you our thanks, Pearls." Batsputin replied as the other Universal Lords gathered behind him. "If you hadn't shown up, our deaths would've caused a political uproar!"

"You truly saved us during the meeting." Dionna added happily.

"We'll be sure to put the good word in about your services." Reximillian bowed gratefully.

"It was a pleasure meeting you!" Wobbla declared.

"I'll have to check out Homeworld for myself and see what has changed." Vigrid pondered.

"In case you haven't gotten the message by now, we are forever in your debt." Ezlipsia said.

"You are all much too kind, but I fear we aren't done yet." Cap thanked the Universal Lords while opening the bay door. "Torius is undoubtedly still out there, and I think that his empire has much more where that came from."

"But still, after what one of Cinnabar's minions did to him," Pony added nervously. "who knows what he could do to the rest of them?"

--

"YOU FOOOOLS!" Torius shrieked furiously at Cinnabar and her minions as he licked his wounds from Zoisite's accidental hit on him. To say he was positively livid at his latest failure was an understatement. "I WAS THIS CLOSE TO DESTROYING MY BROTHER, ONLY FOR YOU TO TAKE IT ALL AWAY FROM ME!

"But you don't understand; Batsputin was trying to tell you that Bartok was playing the two of you against each other from the start!" Cinnabar stood up in defense of her minions. "I ask of you to give us another chance!"

"No, I'm done giving chances!" Torius growled. "Now, allow me to bathe the starways in your shards!" He then prepared to tear the Gems standing before him to shreds, only for Zoisite to buy them time by stabbing him in the same spot in his ear where she shot him before. "Fool!"

"Everyone, we have to get out of here!" Zoisite commanded her fellow Gems while knocking Torius down as the six Gems fled for the mothership's massive hanger, leaving the prince turned crime lord to give chase.

"GET BACK HERE, YOU NO GOOD CORUNDUMS!" Torius shrieked as he tossed all sorts of furniture at the fleeing Gems. "STAY RIGHT WHERE YOU ARE SO YOU CAN BE PUNISHED FOR YOUR CONSTANT FAILURES!"

"Faster everyone, faster!" Cinnabar commanded her forces as soon as they found the nearest ship and used it to escape their now former ally's wrath, leaving Torius to keep shrieking angrily.

"You can run, but all Gems will come back as cowards!" Torius snarled at the fleeing ship before he turned away to start plotting. "It seems I'll have to take matters into my own hands. First, I shall have to terminate those Pearls myself since a certain someone is too inept to do it. Then, I'll move on to the rest of Homeworld itself."

--

The road to the BPB finale begins! All that's left is our penultimate episode "Light the Way" followed by the big two-part finale "Shining Diamond". It has been a pleasure delivering consistently quality content to my adoring viewers week by week, and I hope to keep doing it for many years to come if I'm not procrastinating. See you all next week for "Light the Way", and happy Fourth of July! Not that there's anything about this dystopian hellhole to be proud of anymore.