#excuse while I cry myself to sleep while listening to I bet on losing dogs by mitski

[the-girl-with-too-many-ideas]

The other day, I was scrolling through Tik Tok when I came across a video talking about a 6 week old kitten who was found trying to take care of a few other kittens who were 2 weeks. They were screenshots, and one of them had a quote saying, "Imagine you're small and cold and scared, but there's smaller ones that are smaller colder and more scared."

I haven't been okay since because it sounds like Yue Qi and Shen Jiu. Their only three years apart, so all I can imagine is a toddler taking care of an infant.

All I can imagine is Qi-ge, who is nothing more than three or four. His an orphan slave and his hungry and cold and scared. When he suddenly finds a baby. His smaller and crying and just like him. Hungry and cold and scared while not knowing why. Then, next thing he knows, his picking him up and trying to comfort the little infant. As Qi-ge holds this little boy who is younger and even more helpless than himself, he decides to care for him.

He is just three-year-old Qi-Ge who decides to take responsibility for an infant Xiao Jiu.

[giantchasm]

Can I make you find songs for all your faves? Jk, I know that's asking too much. How about doing Elise from Fire Emblem?

I think a pretty good Elise song is Brighter by Against The Current!

Sometimes we gotta risk it all to chase a dreamIt’s a dive in head first, all-or-nothing kind of thingEvery single time that we lay it on the lineIt’s a roller coaster ride for oneWhen you know it’s do or die and you’re running out of timeWe gotta give it all we’ve got

However, did you say ALL of my faves? You may have joked, as that is legitimately too much. BUT little did you know one of my favorite things to do is actually associate music with my interests! SO. I. I’m gonna do it. Under the cut I’m gonna list off a got damn song for every single one of my favorite characters… For my favorite fandoms. Admittedly ALL of them would be too much. But I’ll do it for Kagepro, Heathers, NITW, BMC, TWEWY, AND FMA (THIS IS LEGIT ONE OF MY SPECIAL INTERESTS AND I NEVER GET A CHANCE TO GET IT OUT. THANK U YOU HAVE SAVED MY LIFE.)

Sad Machine - Porter Robinson

I don’t know much about your life beyond these wallsThe fleeting sense of love within these God-forsaken hallsAnd I can hear it in his voice, in every callThis girl who’s slept a hundred years has something after allAnd though I know, since you’ve awakened her againShe depends on you, she depends on youI’ll go alone, and never speak of you againWe depend on you, we depend on you

True Love - PINK

At the same time, I wanna hug youI wanna wrap my hands around your neckYou’re an asshole but I love youAnd you make me so mad I ask myselfWhy I’m still here, or where could I goYou’re the only love I’ve ever knownBut I hate you, I really hate youSo much, I think it must beTrue love, true love

Plastic Flowers - The Front Bottoms

Listen, just because something burns brightDoesn’t mean it’s going to burn foreverSo all these people around you saying“You’ve got so much further to go!”“It’s going to get worse before it gets better”I don’t know… I don’t if that true

I’m Just A Kid - Simple Plan

I woke up, it was 7I waited ‘til 11Waited ‘til 11Just to figure out that no one would callI think I’ve got a lot of friends but I don’t hear from themWhat’s another night all alone?When you’re spending everyday on your ownAnd here it goesI’m just a kid and life is a nightmareI’m just a kid, I know that it’s not fairNobody cares, cause I’m alone and the world isHaving more fun than me tonight

Paper Dreams - Lucy Spraggan 

I’ll admit that I could look fitter,I might get jealous but I’ll never be a quitter,Stumble on your heels while i do up my shoelace,I might be a bitch but I’ll never be two faced.I’ll say what I want, and do what I do,I have my own friends and they hate you too,You have to give respect to get respect,Crawling back under your rock is your best bet.

Secrets - Mary Lambert

I can’t think straight, I’m so gaySometimes I cry a whole dayI care a lot, use an analog clockAnd never know when to stopAnd I’m passive, aggressiveI’m scared of the dark and the dentistI love my butt and won’t shut upAnd I never really grew up

Little Prince - AJJ

This juxtaposition of good and bad Remind me of the best and the worst dreams I’ve hadI’m either too happy or fucking sadAnd I can’t keep up with thatAnd my job, what a shame!Just a mountain of death filling up my brainI’m always tied to the tracks of the trainDesperately afraid of going insane

Misguided Ghosts - Paramore

I’m going away for a whileBut I’ll be backDon’t try and follow me‘Cause I’ll return as soon as possibleSee, I’m trying to find my placeBut it might not be here where I feel safeWe all learn to make mistakesAnd run from them, from themWith no directionWe’ll run from them, from themWith no conviction

Sum of Our Parts - Mary Lambert

I didn’t know I was a phoenixTill I learned how to speakEven with ashes in my mouth,I was still born to breatheI wonder are you like me?Were you left in the fire?Are you raising yourselfAbove your father’s empire?

Always Gold - Radical Face

Everything goes awayYeah everything goes awayBut I’m gonna be here until I’m nothingBut bones in the groundSo quiet downWe were opposites at birthI was steady as a hammerNo one worried ‘cause they knew just where I’d beAnd they said you were the crooked kindAnd that you’d never have no worthBut you were always gold to me

Human - Ellie Goulding

Human, I wonder why you’re a better make Than I could ever build or create,You know not love or hateI am so scared of what will kill me in the endFor I am not prepared,I hope I will get the chance…To be someone,To be human

Viva La Vida - Coldplay

I used to rule the worldSeas would rise when I gave the wordNow in the morning I sleep aloneSweep the streets I used to own I used to roll the dice Feel the fear in my enemy’s eyesListened as the crowd would sing,“Now the old king is dead! Long live the king!”One minute I held the keyNext the walls were closed on meAnd I discovered that my castles standUpon pillars of salt and pillars of sand

The Boy Who Blocked His Own Shot - Brand New

If it makes you less sad, I will die by your handI hope you find out what you wantI already know what I amAnd if it makes you less sad, we’ll start talking againAnd you can tell me how vile I already know that I amI’ll grow old and start acting my ageI’ll be a brand new day in a life that you hate

Anything I’m Not - Lenka

I will never beI will never be youNoI will always beI will always be meThat I knowBut, oh,Even thoughI’m happy being meI want to get awayFrom allThis harsh reality

(SHE’S HARD CAUSE SHE HAS NO CANON PERSONALITY. ME AND MY FRIENDS JUST KINDA PULLED ONE OUT OF OUR ASS ALL THOSE YEARS AGO WHEN TWEWY WAS OUR SI, BUT- WHEN WORST COMES TO WORST… OUR INTERPRETATION ALWAYS DID COME DOWN TO PINING LESBIANISM)

Jenny - Studio Killers

Jenny, darling, you’re my best friendBut there’s a few things that you don’t know ofWhy I borrow your lipstick so oftenI’m using your shirt as a pillow case

I wanna ruin our friendshipWe should be lovers insteadI don’t know how to say this‘Cause you’re really my dearest friend

Awkward Conversations - The Front Bottoms

Awkward situations followed by awkward hugsAnd these bullshit conversations take what little air is left inside myNothing but I’m writing like I’ve had too much to drinkLetting go of what we lostCome to terms with how you think of meAnd I love what you’ve done, you cut all tiesYou turned and runYou build me up, you take your fallYou led us straight into a wallAnd I’ll say, “I personally think it’s too cold to have the windows open,but you want to smoke your menthol cigarettes.”

(She gets three songs because I love her more than life itself)

Twelve Feet Deep - The Front Bottoms

Since when did “I wanna hear your voice” not become a good excuse?Calling you three in the morning, laugh at sleep that we’ll both loseMaybe college won’t work out, I can come live at your houseI’m supposed to be at class now but my roommate just passed outAnd I cannot get in my room, get all my books and what I needYou’re all I need but I am pretty sure your parents will never seeI’ll let it be, ‘cause it was never meant to beI’ll let it be.

You Said Okay - Flatsound

Sometimes when I look up I see starsThat cut through the sky and fade quickly into nothingness And I pray that you aren’t as fleeting Because when we’re lying in roads I get the same feeling That gravity will just turn off and I’ll fall endlessly Into something much larger than I am And I wonder if that’s what it feels like to die and If I’ll ever understand God in my lifespan Because I want to see God I want to know what god feels like 

A Small List of Things I Would Normally Hide

So I’ve been trying to let go of the things that torture me insideCongratulations, you’re cordially invitedTo a small list of things that I normally would hideLike high school: No comprehension of enough harmCodeine for numb hearts and patching up cut armsBut drinking cough syrup when you didn’t have a coughIs ironic, because in reality you’re sicker than you thoughtBut, like hearing new music, and being too scared to turn it upVirgin blood mostly told me to stop at the surface cutsAnd sometimes I wouldn’t eat more than a couple bitesAnd sometimes I’d go a week and not sleep more than a couple nightsAnd sometimes I’d get so wrapped up in the “couple life”When the “couple life” failed me the first couple times

Peach - The Front Bottoms (I guess the Nitwit gang is just a TFB crew. Also as a note this is abt him and Angus!

You are my peach, you are my plumYou are my earth, you are my sunI love your fingers, I love your toesThe back of your head, the tip of your noseAnd you are the reason I’m smiling when there is nothing to smile aboutYeah, you are the reason I’m smiling when there is nothing to smile aboutOne day you will find someone who will love you like you deserveBut tonight I’m the only one left, And I’m betting it’s a fact that you will never learn

Legit Tattoo Gun - The Front Bottoms (I HAD TO KEEP THE WEIRD NITW TFB THING GOING. Ignore the romance-y parts of this song. That’s not why I picked it.)

My head has thoughts What a ridiculous place to start She said, well, how about my chest Or, more specifically, my heartWhenever I’m alone or feeling lonely I pretend I can play the drums Inside my head and I am good I love these songs They love my songs

Putting The Dog To Sleep - The Antlers

Well my trust in youIs a dog with a broken legTendons too torn to begFor you to let me back inYou said I can’t prove to youYou’re not gonna die aloneBut trust me to take you homeTo clean up that blood all over your paws

Flagpole Sitta - Harvey Dagger

Put me in the hospital for nervesAnd then they had to commit meYou told them all I was crazy!They cut off my legs now I’m an amputee, God damn you!I’m not sick but I’m not wellAnd I’m so hot cause I’m in hellI’m not sick but I’m not wellAnd it’s a sin to live so well

Black Pear Tree - The Mountain Goats

I set the sapling in the holeStarted gently tamping down the dirtI saw the future in a dream last nightSomebody’s gonna get hurt, somebody’s gonna get hurtI hope it’s not meBut I suspect it’s going to have to be

Coming Back - Dean Ray

You can steal my mindTwist it for a while,But you can’t take my prideYou can watch me crack,Throw me way off track But I’ll keep coming backThe streets of Heaven never had a nameI found my own way thereI know I’m bound to lose my way againCause love and war is never fair

Soldier’s Daughter - Jhameel

Greetings good stranger I’ve seen the light as wellIt shines through my country and so i feel compelledTo hold my conscience to what the bible tellsAnd all I know is I don’t want to go to hellAnd peace and love and freedom are worth a bullet weltI learned this from my father who lived and who fellHe once took the oath before his flag and kneltHe died in the war and no remorse was felt

King of The World - Young Rising Sons

I know loss I’ve looked pain in the eyeI’ve seen the demons that live in the nightBut if I was kingIf I was king of the worldAll the talesThat have never been toldBuild up fires to keep away the coldWe’ll sing songsThat will never get oldWe’ll be here forever

(IM SORRY GLUTTONY MY BOY BUT I LEGITIMATELY CANNOT FIND A SONG FOR YOU IT’S BEEN LIKE 15 MINUTES)

(As a note this is for Selim Post-Promised-Day. Since that sort of scenario is when he becomes a fave. Hhhhhh “normal child” forced to remember he was a complete monster. MMM SLURP)

The Mute - Radical Face

And through them days I was a ghost atop my chairMy dad considered me a cross he had to bearAnd in my head I’d sing apologies and stareAs my mom would hang the clothes across the lineAnd she would try to keep the empty from her eyesSo, then one afternoon I dressed myself aloneI packed my pillowcase with everything I ownedAnd in my head I said goodbye, then I was goneAnd I set out on the heels of the unknownSo my folks could have a new life of their ownSo that maybe I could find someoneWho could hear the only words that I’d known

Your Heart Is A Muscle The Size of Your Fist - Ramshackle Glory

Like the time that our friend Chuck came over to our houseHe said he needed somebody to take care of his petsCause he was going out of townI asked him “Where?” and he said “New Mexico.”I asked if I could get a rideHe said: “No, you don’t want to follow meWhere it is I’m going.”He pulled out of the drive wayThat was the last time we saw himCause he drove straight to his parent’s cabinAnd put a bullet in his headYour heart is a muscle the size of your fistKeep on loving. Keep on fightingAnd hold on, and hold onHold on for your life

Terror(ism) - Jubyphonic

But where is it supposed to go?And where am I? I don’t even knowNever wondered muchBut now I’m stuck with all these funny feelingsTurned into the kind of person you had always hated? Well I wonder how it feelsTo hear the heavens laughing at you as they Point their fingers down at you and start to jeer“Why don’t you shut your ugly mouth and just go?”“Don’t wanna see you! Get outta my way!”All the bitter things…Start to hurt a little more and turn you grey

Hard Out Here - Lily Allen

I suppose I should tell you what this bitch is thinkingYou’ll find me in the studio and not in the kitchenI won’t be bragging ‘bout my cars or talking 'bout my chainsDon’t need to shake my ass for you 'cause I’ve got a brainIf I told you 'bout my sex life, you’d call me a slutWhen boys be talking ‘bout their bitches, no one’s making a fussThere’s a glass ceiling to break, uh-huh, there’s money to makeAnd now it’s time to speed it up 'cause I can’t move at this paceSometimes it’s hard to find the words to sayI’ll go ahead and say them anywayForget your balls and grow a pair of titsIt’s hard, it’s hard, it’s hard out here for a bitch

No Culture - Mother Mother

And I’m like a kid in a candy storeTaking all the taffy that I don’t ask for, yeahI’m like a bull in a china shopKnocking off a knock-off'Cause I got no cultureI got no culture of mineSo can we let sleeping dogs lie'Cause everyone believes me when I say it’s mineA little wool over the eyes'Cause everyone believes me

(He gets FIVE because I have LOTS of complicated feelings abt him and it takes more than one song to sum that up)

City - Hollywood Undead

The city looks so pretty, do you wanna burn it with me?'Til the skies bleeds ashes and the fucking skyline crashesThey catch us with matches to ignite the flameAnd all the hopes of a youth deemed fucking insaneThey say “Take the pill”“In God we trust”“Go and kill”“God loves us”As in life as in deathBreathing 'til there is no breathI will not die in the night but in the lightOf the sun with the ashes of this world in my lungsBut who am I to say let’s all just run awayGrab your saints and pray, we’re gonna burn this world today

Clean Freak - Jubyphonic

“All people are different” you say bluntly Look at “Needing” and “Wanting” same seven letters But what if you’re wrong and change it up to be “We’re human” Whatever works to shut my mouth?  Then why not write a book? Words and letters To define it, definite answers to questions How to live dealing with lots of things Like when a boy and a girl want “pure relations” All of the people crying from all the loneliness in their hearts All of the people lying that they will understand every part All of the people truly think that love is a thing we take No one sees that we haven’t seen at all!

Tommy Gun - Royal Republic

I guilty stand before youI know I misbehavedI never meant to hurt youI humbly beg forgivenessHope that my soul be savedBut if I had a final wish…I would only ask this…I want you to kill me with a tommy-gun babyWith a tommy-gun baby kill meIf you have to kill me use a tommy-gun baby

Cry For Judas - The Mountain Goats

Some things you do just to seeHow bad they’ll make you feelSometimes you try to freeze time'Til the slots are a blur of spinning wheelsBut I am just a broken machineAnd I do things that I don’t really meanLong black night, morning frostI’m still here, but all is lostSpeed up to the precipiceAnd then slam on the brakesSome people crash two or three timesAnd then learn from their mistakesBut we are the ones who don’t slow down at allAnd there’s nobody there to catch us when we fall(Sad and angry, can’t learn how to behaveStill won’t know how in the darkness of the grave)

Above The Clouds of Pompeii - Bear’s Den

(You were a God in my eyesAbove the clouds, above the skiesYou were a God in my eyesYou were a God)

You said “Stay in the car and waitThere’s just some things I have to say”Don’t you know I miss her, too!?I miss her just as much as you…

So my father and my sonAs you end what she’s begunYou’ll lie patient by her sideWith roses red come lilies white

I was too young to understandThe flowers slipping from your handsI was too young to understandI was too young to understand

I was too young to understandThe flowers sleeping in her handsI was too young to understandI was too young to understand

Don’t cryHold your head up highShe would want you toShe would want you to

Video Games - The Young Professionals 

It’s you, it’s you, it’s all for youEverything I doI tell you all the timeHeaven is a place on Earth with youTell me all the things you wanna doI heard that you like the bad girlsHoney, is that true?It’s better than I ever even knewThey say that the world was built for twoOnly worth living if somebody is loving youBaby now you do

Polaroid - Imagine Dragons

I'mma hold my cards closeI'mma wreck what I love mostI’m a first-class let-downI'mma a “shut up, sit down”I am a head caseI am the color of boomThat’s never arrivingAnd you are the pay raiseAlways a touch out of viewAnd I am the color of boom

Try - Colbie Caliat

Put your make-up onGet your nails doneCurl your hairRun the extra mileKeep it slim so they like you, do they like you?Get your sexy onDon’t be shy, girlTake it offThis is what you want, to belong, so they like youDo you like you?You don’t have to try so hardYou don’t have to, give it all awayYou just have to get up, get up, get up, get upYou don’t have to change a single thing

Live Your Life - Mika

You’ve got the whole world in your pocketBut you just don’t knowEverybody’s smilin’ at you everywhere you goIt’s like you’ve got that secretThat everybody else wants to knowAnywhere you are is just like home to youFrom the beaches in ManilaDown to KatmanduYeah you’ve got that secretThat everybody else wants to knowBut you won’t ever let it go ohEverybody wanna hold your handEverybody wanna shine that brightEverybody wanna say they canEverybody wanna live your lifeEverybody wanna talk like youOnly wanna do the things you do'Cause they always gonna turn out rightEverybody wanna live your life