#ew neighbours

[loosepaste]

FORGOT TO POST THIS ONE

Jon looks so stupid I love him dearly

[zedleaked]

thinking about a random scenario for Surf & Turf if the neighbours were there...

[I feel like Tom doesn't know about Jon's death because he was still in the rubble when Jon died]

My mspaint draft comic under cut if you're curious

enjoy i think

[peach-jelly-lemon]

Astonishing how much explanation this stupid comic needs but essentially my friends and I got addicted to the farm merge valley activity on discord and decided Tord and Mark would be the most likely to play it and it's the ONLY thing they talk to each other about they have nothing else whatsoever in common and no interest in trying

Also Edd could not care less but Tord literally never makes friends so hes baffled that this is how he did it

[drunkonduty]

because your like super supportive of me (thx u so much) can you draw a little goobery doodle of jon ? :3

How about doodles

[jeffrrandell]

Rants from instagram. The neighbours and Edds gang have such a perfect dynamic set up to me. Like Edd and Eduardo are just as goofy as the other, and they clearly both want to play along just to create a scene like they're in a movie. They each have things they could admire each other for, be jealous about, and this goes for the others and their counterparts too. To me, they're so similar it's basically just them from another universe, ones who have learned to deal with things and express themselves differently. But they can't be too similar (as in show they are,) and they are aware of their dynamic and need everyone to think they're like any antagonist or protagonist who battle each other in any show. Even if they became friends overtime, they will always be pushy show offs towards each other. The same guy, but definitely NOT the same guy. I just love it.

[saiskulls]

「 just shut up and take the stage / this outrage is all the rage 」

[eddasks]

WELL, WELL, WELL! Smell's like LOSERTOWN came around to tumblr! - The superior neighbor

Eduaarrddooo.. 😒

Can you not copy what I do for once?

[devastation-builds-gunpla]

GODDANG THING SNAPPED IN HALF AS I TRIED TO BEND IT! HOPEFULLY RRHE SUPERGLUE HOLDS IT TOGETHER!!!!!!

I was working on my RG Wing zero EW when ...I put too much force on it. There goes that arm's ability to pose....

Edit: I tried to pose the arm and it did, in fact, not hold together.

[softboiledwonderland]

Was at the club tonight. Now trying to figure out if I ever really liked clubs or was I just deluding myself because going out was a Thing that teenagers did

[slightlyhowling]

My (Finnish) version of this: kids are fine. Usually even recommended listening. Drunken and fighting grown ups should be sent to a garbage dump.

children outside screaming: annoying but ultimately for the greater good. children need Going Outside and Screaming Time for proper emotional development. an auditory burden I am willing to bear

neighbor with his car he made louder on purpose: jail for neighbor. jail for ten thousand years

[velvetreds]

someone help me with oikawa characterisation PELASE

[zedleaked]

begging for more mark n eduardo with ghost jon content <3 /nf

I LOVE NEIGHBOURS GHOST JON STUFF!!!! the thought of Mark and Eduardo using an oujia board to talk to Jon,, maybe Jon does some silly ghost tomfoolery to remind them that he's still here.... I'm very normal you see.

[b3ach-bunn7]

CHANGE OUT OF SOMETHING YOU KNOW

You’re the League of Villans new healer. Messages between you and their resident arsonist.

slight nsfw, more just teasing than anything else

(title based off the blood orange song plz listen 🙏)

—————————————————————————

October 8th

2:06 pm

You: hi, idk if Shigaraki told you but I’m the leagues new healer!! I think we r bedroom neighbours :D

You: so if u need anything I’m a room away lol

Dabi: K

You: wow so articulate

Seen

October 10th

12:09am

Dabi: Shiggy says go to the bar

You: okay

You: what did he need?

Seen

October 11th:

4:40 pm

You: did u eat my leftovers

Dabi: 🧐

You: BRUH

You: ur buying me more idgaf

Dabi: Hell no

You: I’m gonna tell kugisaki then

Dabi: Okay? Tf is he gonna do

You: aren’t u on his Spotify family plan

Dabi: Fine I’ll fucking buy u more fatty

You: HAHA

October 13th

10:09am

Dabi: Shut the fuck up

Dabi: Ur so loud

You: that’s what she said 😂

Dabi: Actually kys

Dabi: Turn that shit down

You: aw ur so nice 🥰

October 15th

2:06 am

You: can u shut up it’s 2am

Seen

October 19th

1:18 am

You: where r u

You: shig says u need me

Dabi: I don’t need shit

Dabi: I’m fine

You: right so the blood trail leading to ur room is just decor then?

Dabi: Getting a head start on Halloween

You: just let me in 😒

October 20th 

3:07 pm

You: where do u get the staples for ur face and stuff

Dabi: Y

You: just Y is crazy 😭

You: I’m getting supplies for the league

Dabi: Target

You: ???

You: they’re just normal staples???

You: I thought they were like medical ones

Dabi: Too expensive 

You: brokie

Dabi: Kys 

You: okay and what if I did

Dabi: Mission accomplished

You: prick 

October 22nd

11:31 pm

Dabi: Need healing

You: what’s the magic word 😁

Dabi: I’ll burn u to a crisp?

You: omw!!!!

October 25th

8:43 pm

You: do u guys do anything for Halloween

Dabi: R we 12

You: duck off

Dabi: 🦆 

You: STFY

You: ykw I mean

You: like a party or smth

You: or do I have to source my Halloween activities outside of the league

Dabi: Idk

Dabi: Ask Toga

You: okay thanks for nothing 🙄

Seen

October 25th

10:01 pm

You: ME AND TOGA R HAVING A MOVIE NIGHT

You: 🤪🤪🤪🤪

You: u are invited 

Dabi: K

You: its for Halloween so u have to dress up

Dabi: The fuck

Dabi: Y

You: togas never cekebrated Halloween

You: and she got kinda sad when I asked fo i told her we can dress up here

Dabi: Oh

You: so if u can come she’d greatly appreciate it!!!

You: and ig I would too 😒

Dabi: Yh you’d love me there

You: shut up 

October 29th

3:43 am

Dabi: Y/N

Dabi: Y/N

Dabi: R u awake

Dabi: Y/N

Dabi: Wake up

You: wtf do u want 

You: its theee am

Dabi: Ik but I need you

You: huh

Dabi: Healing

Dabi: Got hit bad

You: oh shit okay

You: you in your room?

Dabi: Tes

You: coming

Dabi: Lol

You: bros dying and is still cracking jokes

October 29th

2:05 pm

Dabi: Does ur quirk always do that

You: do what?

Dabi: Hurt u

You: oh thattt

You: well it like gets rid of ur pain and injury but part of the pain had to go to me 

You: has*

You: my pain tolerance is high tho so idm most of the time

You: ur wound was just kinda bad yesterday so it hurt a bit more than usual 😅

You: or this morning ig

Dabi: Oh

Dabi: I didn’t know that

You: lolz it’s okay 😝

You: I’m used to it

Dabi: Thx ig

You: you guess?!??!

Dabi: K

You: YOU kys 

October 31st

7:06 pm

You: YOU ACC DRESSED UP :D

Dabi: I’m wearing plastic fangs

You: I see those eyeliner bite marks on ur neck

Dabi: Y r u looking at my neck freak

Dabi: Should be watching the movie not me

You: shut up

You: does this mean u wear eyeliner

Dabi: Shut the fuck up

You: HAHA

Dabi: Never text me again

You: ughhhhhh ur soooo emo 🖤🥀⛓️

Seen

November 4th

5:09 pm

You: DABI

You: DABIIIIIIUIII

You: PLZ MY CREAMTION KING

Dabi: Cremation u freak

You: LMAOOOOO

You: that was an accident

Dabi: What

You: can u come with me and toga to watch the fireworks 😝

Dabi: Ur actually on Togas dick

Dabi: Leave her alone

You: r u jealous I’m not hanging with u :/

You: I promise we can go out

Dabi: Ew

You: rude

You: plzzz just come

Dabi: 😳

You: UR SO GROSS

You: we r leaving at half past

November 8th 

4:07 pm

Dabi: Grab black hair dye on ur way home 

You: what brand

Dabi: Manic panic

You: wait does this mean ur hair isn’t actually naturally black??

Dabi: No the dyes for Toga

You: ohhh okay

Dabi: Ur so fucking stupid

You: LEAVE ME ALONE 😭😭

You: can I help u dye it 😝

Dabi: No

You: PLEAAAAAAAASE

Missed call

Dabi: Never call me again

You: PLEASE

Dabi: Fuckijg hell

Dabi: Fine

You: YIPEEE

November 12th

1:15 am

You: dabi istg

You: shut the actual fuck up

You: both of you

Missed call

You: bro ur actually pissing me off

You: WE SHARE A WALL

You: I CAN HEAR U TEO FUCKING LIKE IM IN THE ROOM WITH YOU

You: I actually hate you 

November 12th

3:06 am

Dabi: Soz

Dabi: Lol

Dabi: We’re finished now

You: yeah I could fucking tell 

You: dickhead

Dabi: 🙁

Dabi: I was just giving her a good time

Dabi: I can show you if you’d like

You: she’s literlaly still in the room with you u degenerate 

Dabi: You been listening?

Dabi: Freaky 😛

You: FUCK YOU

November 15th

10:06 pm

Dabi: image attachment

Dabi: Tf is this

You: it’s yakult idiot 

Dabi: Why is it in my room

You: oh I heard u say to toga u can’t buy them cause

You: ur a famous villain and stuff

You: so I bought some when I was out 😝

Dabi: Why

You: omg we’ve upgraded to full words

You: idk I just saw them and remebered so i grabbed them

You: if u don’t want them I’ll come grab them sorry if I made u feel weird

Dabi: Shut up it’s fine

Dabi: Thx

You: 😝

November 17th 

9:07 pm

Dabi: image attachment

You: HAHHA

You: WHAT HAPOENED

Dabi: Some weird ass slime guy in an alley way

Dabi: Spinner got hit

You: he looks like those alien toys that come in the slime eggs

Dabi: 🤣🤣

You: poor baby

You: I can’t heal that

November 20th

11:16 pm

Missed call

Missed call

Dabi: What did I say about calling me 

You: plz pick up

You: I think this guy is following me

You: and I’m scared

You: I took like three turns anrbhes still behind me

Dabi & Y/N, Time elapsed: 45 minutes

November 21st

12:15 am

You: thank you for earlier 

Dabi: It’s ok

Dabi: What did he look like 

You: uhm a bit shorter than u, brown hair and I think brown eyes

You: he was wearing a green bomber jacket and he was by the corner shop

You: why

Dabi: None of ur business 

You: I can hear u leaving ur room

You: where r u going

Dabi: Shut up

You: right 😭

November 22nd 

1:06 am

You: bro not again

You: please STOP

You: can’t u go back to their place for once like 😭😭

Dabi: He’s busy 😘

You: girl idgaf

You: go be busy somewhere else 

You: or stfu

Dabi: Sorry

Dabi: She took my phone 

You: again idgaf just plz shut up I wanna sleep

Dabi: K

You: 🖕

November 24th

9:09 pm 

You: me and twice are watching a movie if you wanna join 

Dabi: What r u watching

You: hot fuzz 😝 

You: a classic 

You: u probably don’t even know it 

You: it’s kinda underground and too cool for u

Dabi: I do fucking know it

Dabi: Cornetto triology

You: …

You: literally in love with u rn 😍

Dabi: Shut up

Dabi: Coming don’t start without me

You: okayyyyyy

Dabi: Stfu

You: 😞

November 30th

8:07 pm

Dabi: Turn ur music down

Dabi: Y/N

Dabi: Y/N

Missed call

You: what did I say about calling me 🥀⛓️🖤

Dabi: Turn ur fucking music down 

You: It’s chappel roan 🙁

Dabi: I don’t give a fuck

You: KNEE DEEP IN THE PASSENGER SEAT

Dabi: Stfu

You: AND UR EATING ME OUT 😔😔

Dabi: You wish

You: :/ don’t ruin Chappel for me

Dabi: I’d show chappel a good time

You: She’s a lesbian u freak

You: EYE will show her a good time

Dabi: Can I watch 😍

You: Ew

Dabi: 😔

December 2nd

6:36 pm

You: bro

You: where tf is kugisaki

You: do yk 

Dabi: Nah

Dabi: What do u need 

You: I’m so fucking cold

You: the heating in my room isn’t working😔😔😔😔

You: and I’m gonna die of coldness

Dabi: L

Dabi: Can’t relate

You: where r u rn

Dabi: Couch

You: okay I’m coming

You: ur gonna warm me up thanks for offering I accept

Dabi: Tf

You: On my way! 

Dabi: Lol

You: shuddup 

Dabi: Stay in ur cold room then

You: IM SORDY IM SORRY

You: u can keep talking forever 

Dabi: Good girl

Dabi: Bring the yakult from my room

You: okay 😁

December 10th

5:45 pm

Dabi: Are u crying

You: omfg can u hear me

You: that’s so embarassing wtf 😭

Dabi: Why r u crying

You: lmao I’m just on my period

You; I saw a tik tok of those army dads coming home and they always make me cry

Dabi: Lol I just heard u sob again

You: yeah it’s so funny 

December 10th

6:10 pm

You: DABI

You: DID U GET ME THESE

You: THE CHOCOLATE AND THE heavy duty pads

Dabi: No

You: :D u so did

You: thank u :((

You: how did u know I like m&ms 😝

Dabi: Cause ur always eating them fatty

You: HEY

You: I’ll cry again

Dabi: Loser

You: yeah a loser u bought chocolate for 

December 15th

9:18 pm

Dabi: Why r u crying again

You: why r u watching me freak

You: it’s movie night not Y/N night

Dabi: I can hear u sniffling ur right next to me

You; YH cause ur warm

You: idk my sister loved this movie

Dabi: Why is that making u cry

You: because she’s dead 😁

Dabi: Oh

You: yeah oH 

Dabi: Damn

You: LMAO 

You: thank u for the comfort 🙏🙏

Dabi: Idk what to say 😔

You: people usually say sorry

Dabi: I’m not saying that shit

Dabi: i didn’t kill her

You: LMAOOO

Dabi: There there 

You: that works 

You: just keep me warm and I’ll be okay

Dabi: I’m not a human heater

You: my body is telling me smth different

Dabi: 😒

December 18th

5:07 pm

You: bro do u have my laundry

You: I think spinner put it in ur room by accident 

Dabi: He did 😁

You: why r u so happy about that

Dabi: Cause ur pink panties are so pretty

You: I’m gonna kill myself!

You: STOP LOOKING AT MY JNDERWEAR 

Dabi: Its not my fault theyre all over my bed 

Dabi: So u like lace

Dabi: Noted

You: I hope u know I’m on the ledge rn

Dabi: Aw don’t be shy 

Dabi: Its nothing I haven’t seen before

You: whore 

Dabi: A good one

You: I’m coming to get them and no words will be exchanged between us

Dabi: Boring

December 19th 

8:37 pm

You: oh dabi 😁😁😁😁😁

Dabi: No

You: u don’t even know what I want

Dabi: Yes I do

Dabi: Toga and Twice asked me and I said no

You: :(

You: plz it will be so fun

You: and the limit is ten pound plz

You: I haven’t done a secret Santa in ages and forever

Dabi: No

You: pleeeeeaaaaaaaaase

You: :(

Dabi: Fucking hell 

Dabi: Ok

Dabi: If I get shiggy I’m buying him Vaseline

You: YIPPEE

You: thank u :D

Dabi: Stfu

December 23rd

11:52 pm

Dabi: Come to my room 

You: fuck off

You: yk I can see u from the living room

Dabi: Oh

Dabi: Okay?

You: u ain’t slick lil bro 😭

You: also yk that’s not even mistletoe

You: I think that’s just a twig from outside

Dabi: Again

Dabi: Okay?

You: shut up

Dabi: Plz come to my room I need healing 🙁

You: SHUSH

December 25th

2:06 am

Dabi: y/n

Dabi: why arnet unhere

Dabi: ehy am I dirnkifn with shiggy and teice 

Dabi: shouod be with u baby

You: oh dabi :/

You: I told u I wanted to stay and watch Christmas movies with Toga 

You: r u drunk 

Dabi: ovviusly 

Dabi: come to the bar

Dabi: wanna kiss you 

Dabi: bring the miserlloe

Dabi: miseltoe

You: shut up

Dabi: xome shut me up with ur mouth

Dabi: so hot

Dabi: are u wearing that lacy underwar 

You: plz stop talking about my underwear 🙏

Dabi: vant stop thinking about them

Dabi: wanna fuck you white youve still got them on

You: okay!!!! I think that’s enough drinks for u!!!!!!

Dabi: no im beirng fr

Dabi: ur so hot

Dabi: hmerry christmas 

You: merry christmas dabi

Dabi: my lisp really hrut 

Dabi: kiss them better

You: hypothetically I could

Dabi: pelase baby

You: goodnight!!

December 26th 

3:07 pm

Dabi: I meant all of it btw

You: 😭😭 u drank half the bar 

You: how r u even awake

Dabi: Fucking headache

You: I can heal it if u want

Dabi: Please

You: okayyy omw 

Dabi: Wait

Dabi: Did u open ur secret Santa

You: wait no I didn’t

You: cause u wanted to be different and leave it in my room and not under the tree

Dabi: Open it first

You: okay………

You: Dabi

Dabi: 😁

You: is this fucking christmas themed lingerie

Dabi: 😁😁😁😁

Dabi: Wear it while u heal me

You: DIE

—————————————————————————

do I think the LOV would actually be this close and family au? Probably not. Do I care? HELL NO. Ik he’d be such a degenerate even if he is a cutie deep down

also the whole “he’s busy 😘” thing is him trying to get over u and realising he acc wants to fuck YOU and not the random girls he’s picking up on the streets

I feel like my Britishness comes into play so much in these text posts so plz excuse it.. but I just love Touya.. my inspiration has been crazy recently but plz don’t get used to this 😔 uni is only getting busier

[drunkonduty]

This dumbass app is gonna be the end of me

[luveline]

𝐰𝐞𝐚𝐫 𝐢𝐭 𝐰𝐞𝐥𝐥 | 𝐚𝐚𝐫𝐨𝐧 𝐡𝐨𝐭𝐜𝐡𝐧𝐞𝐫

when internet trolls poke fun at your appearance while working on a case, hotch is there to make you feel better. fem!reader, 3k

tw cyberbullying, poor eating habits, criminal minds typical violence

˚ʚ♡ɞ˚

You're not a media liaison or anything close, but with JJ off for maternity leave and Penelope in Quantico, there's a face needed for the press announcement on TV, and you offer to step in. 

You aren't particularly eager to do it, but Hotch doesn't have the time or wherewithal and such a high intensity case, not while Spencer is at half-mast, migraines rendering him ineffective and stubborn. You're trying to keep the ship sailing smoothly, doing your part of the profiling while juggling media and supporting the police sergeant that's heading the tip line.

You're not expecting to become a joke. After a red-eye, three sleepless nights trying to find a missing woman in Oklahoma —the domestic violence capital— and a full day without something to eat, you're aware you don't look your best, but you aren't sure what that has to do with your missing person. 

The FBI — fugly bitches International. #FindDanaLangley

Damn, are they not letting those agents sleep or what? She looks terrible ! 

she should be less worried about Dana Langley and more concerned with the dead woman in the mirror, ew 

hope theu find her just so they stop putting this creature on TV #FindDanaLangley

"Well," you murmur, wondering if it would be inappropriate to burst into tears, "these aren't especially helpful." 

Derek looks at you, his gaze measured, and you know he's not sure how to react to you or what's happening. He settles on his usual loving encouragement, because he's a very good friend. 

"Don't listen to all that," he says, throwing his arm around your shoulder, "those trolls wouldn't know beautiful if it hit them in the face. But we could always try it?" 

You sink into his hold, needing the reassurance even if you wish you didn't. "No hitting," you say, covering your mouth to hide a large and possibly fugly yawn. Your head is racing with regurgitated insults. "It doesn't matter, Derek. Promise. We have bigger stuff to deal with." 

The door opens and Hotch and Emily step inside, Rossi just behind them. You're thinking Hotch is going to agree with your sentiment, no time for comfort when a woman's life is at stake, so you move away from Morgan to sit in front of your laptop again. 

"Is something wrong?" Hotch asks. 

You meet his eyes just long enough to smile at him. "Nothing. What did Amandla have to say?" 

Emily retells the alibi of Dana's ex-girlfriend and is clearly suspicious but without proof, you're forced as a team to move on to the next lead. Spencer returns shortly afterward and you try to brainstorm your next step. 

It's Penelope that pulls through. "You asked me to cross reference the neighbours at Dana's previous address with people crossing state lines, right, after that one guy ended up being kinda icky? Well I did that, and nothing came up, which was–" 

"Garcia," Hotch interrupts. 

"Right. Long story short, one of the neighbours recently had an extreme falling out with Icky Guy after a years long friendship, his name is Justin Mantova, he has extreme PTSD with documented episodes of confused aggression, and he's been seen coming in and out of a storage unit in Paseo Storage Solutions for the past four days." 

"Address?" Hotch asks. 

"Already sent to your phones." 

"Thank you, Pen," you say. 

"Just go catch the bad guy, pretty girl," she says. 

Ah, so she's seen the tweets too. You frown rather than smile, reminded again of what's been said and wishing you could be anywhere else. 

You get your wish and forget all about personal grievances for a while, concerned with the safe location and extraction of Dana Langley. The operation is clean, and she's hurt but has a great chance at a full recovery. It's quick, it's professional. 

You're falling asleep in the SUV on the way back. Hotch at the wheel, Spencer in the backseat, you rub your eyes from the passenger side and try not to look suspiciously morose, but it's impossible. Hotch is too good at his job. 

"Are you sure everything's okay?" he asks. With Spencer's window open and the wind whipping, it's hard to hear him. 

"Hm?" 

"Is everything okay?" 

"I'm just tired." You don't look at him. It's rude of you, but if what they've said is true —you'd seen the photographs, and you looked tired, sure, but you still looked like you. "Just tired," you say again. You snap your mouth closed when your voice wobbles. 

Hotch is regularly too sweet on you. Most of the team say it's a crush. Emily calls it 'character development. Whatever it is, he's nice to you. He warmed up to you near immediately when you first joined the team, and he's been as welcoming months later as he was in your first week. 

Maybe he feels sorry for me, you think, submerging yourself inch by inch into self pity. 

The three of you regroup with the others at the police station to pen immediate recounts of what happened before you can forget, tying up loose ends. 

Finally you're able to go back to the hotel. Another half an hour and you're in the lobby.

"We'll go home in the morning. Nine AM flight, meet in the lobby at eight thirty," Hotch says. "Get some rest." 

You disband. They've squeezed you in all over the place, and you're lucky enough to be next to the elevator on the second floor. Hotch is the third floor, and everyone else the sixth, so you say goodbye to your colleagues and exit the elevator, stepping onto the second floor with a parting smile.

You can't know it, but Hotch notices the way your smile falls before the doors have well and truly closed. Your shoulders slump in defeat. 

You trudge into your room and don't bother turning on the lights. The door closes behind you and the mask you'd been holding up starts to crack. You put your laptop in the closet despite temptation to boot it up, knowing no good can come of looking at the tip hashtag again. 

You head into the bathroom to pee, and you're confronted with your appearance as you wash your hands. 

You stare at yourself. 

You look tired. 

Tears well as you look at yourself. You're not those things those people said. You're pretty, and when you smile everyone knows it. There's nothing so beautiful as a smile. You can't summon one, but you know it's the truth. 

Or, it should be. 

A single tear falls down your cheek, quickly followed by a second, and a third from the other eye. You ignore them, tracing the line of your bottom lip, the texture of your skin on your cheeks, the slight sunken effect of your under eyes. 

A knock makes you flinch. "Fuck," you say, wiping your cheek with the back of a hand, twisting on the spot like looking into your room might reveal whoever it is at the door. Probably one of your team. "Hello?" you call. 

"It's me. It's Hotch. I know it's after hours, but I wanted to speak with you."

Whatever reassurance he has to give might actually make this all much worse. You don't want any pity from anybody, you just want today to be over. Still, you wiggle your toes into the plush hotel carpeting, debating only for a moment about the pros and cons of pretending to be asleep. 

"Hey," you say, opening the door. You wipe your eyes and hope he takes it for a tired gesture rather than a method of hiding the glassy sheen at your waterline. "Hi, Hotch, how are you feeling?" 

"Fine. Tired. Thank you for asking." 

"Do you want to come in?" you ask. 

"Please." 

Hotch follows you into your room. There's an armchair across from the bed next to a desk and an old TV sitting atop it. Your suitcase is still open on your bed, your pyjamas crumpled in the shell. You close it before Hotch can see. That's another thing to add to your list: being a slob. 

"It's very clean in here," he says. 

You startle. "What?" 

"It's clean, considering how long we've been here. Have you ever seen Spencer's room at the end of a case?" he asks. 

"No, is it bad?" 

"It's like a paper hurricane."

You look down at your knees, hyper aware of his gaze on your face, tired of feeling uneasy in your skin. 

"I wanted to say thank you for doing the press release yesterday. You did an amazing job. It's something to be proud of." 

Of course he's talking about the press release, the one thing you need to not think about. 

"Did Derek tell you?" you ask. 

"Tell me what?" he asks, voice sharpening.

You look up. Hotch is a picture of concern, professionalism slightly off centre. 

"Nothing." 

"Something's been bothering you. Something Derek should've told me, I'm guessing." 

You chew over your words. "Uh. Hotch, it's really nothing, it's a hiccup. The press release, I…" You really don't want to have to say it. The words get stuck at the back of your throat.

He leans forward. "What?" 

"I looked sick. On TV. I looked really unwell, and it– it actually–" Why are you stammering? What's wrong with you? You laugh and it's not your laugh but it's better than your nonsense stuttering. "Sorry. On the press release, I didn't look my best, and it was a hot topic. That's what I thought Derek told you about. But I don't need anyone feeling sorry for me, Hotch." 

"I don't feel sorry for you." 

You wince, "No, of course not." 

"Two seconds," he says, putting his hand forward in the air between you. "A hot topic? I don't understand." He looks genuinely apologetic. 

"The tip line got clogged up with comments about my appearance," you say. You phrase it as a professional error rather than the embarrassing event it represents in your personal life.

His lips curl downward. "Saying you looked tired." 

"Saying I looked unagreeable." 

"As a friend," he says, tone softening, "could you tell me what they said?" 

Heat blooms in your cheeks and behind your eyes, your throat aching as you scratch at a nonexistent itch in the crook of your elbow. "Um. Well, there was a lot of them, and they weren't all about me, but the ones I saw, they seemed to think I needed more sleep. That I–" 

Hitch rarely interrupts, but something in your voice must impel him. "What did they say?" he asks again. 

"That I looked like a creature. That they hoped Miss Langley would be found, so that they didn't have to see my face on TV again. Hotch," you say, your throat sounding as tight as it feels, "it was pretty bad, but it really doesn't matter." 

"I think it matters if it's upset you," he says. 

He has the warmest voice when he wants it to be, so dulcet, almost melodic. You'd think it was a practised phrase, but he speaks freely. 

"It didn't," you lie. 

Pointless in your line of work and automatic anyways. Hotch doesn't deny you the safety of your untruth, but he doesn't entertain it, either. 

"You're beautiful when you're tired," he says. 

You don't mean to, but you hold your breath. The silence that follows his remark is deafening. 

"You're beautiful," he says, again, as though you could've missed it the first time. "Regrettably, you're very tired, but you don't look any less pretty. Don't think what was sent in to the tip line has any merit." 

"Are you saying that as my friend or my boss?" you ask. It's meant to be a joke that lightens the mood. 

"Neither," Hotch says.

You gawp, and then falter. "Why…" 

Hotch is close enough to offer a hand, and you're feeling stupid enough to take it. He squeezes tenderly, looking you straight in the eye. "I'm sorry about what's being said. I had no idea. We can pull the video, and the tipline should stop now Dana's been found, but it doesn't erase what's already happened. I'm so sorry. It's not right, and it's not fair." 

"It's a hard job, right?" you ask.

His hand is so so big, and not as soft as you'd pictured. It doesn't make a difference, not when he's touching you like you might shatter. 

"That's not the job," he says.

"It's silly to care, though. About what other people think." 

"I hope you care about what I think. The merit of an opinion comes from the person, and the relationship you have with them. Anyone who knew you would know that you're beautiful." 

"Inside that counts," you say, not fully comforted, but trying to give him an out. 

"You're beautiful on the outside," he says, giving your hand a small shake. "You're an amazing woman, of course. But I, for one, enjoyed seeing your face on TV."

You try not to smile too hard, directing your gaze at your joined hands lest he get a read on you.

Hotch must know how you feel about him. He'd be an awful profiler if he didn't. You fawn when you're around him even now, months down the line from your very first meeting when you were sure your heart would ricochet from your chest, the intensity of your instant crush like nothing you'd felt, not even as a schoolgirl. He'd been tall, striking, classically handsome and completely unaware of the fact. Now he's sitting across from you and he doesn't seem so tall, nor so striking. His caring side shines like a gem. It's blinding, and it really does make you feel better. 

"I cried in the bathroom," you confess, rubbing your thumb against his in minute, near imperceptible circles. "I wish it didn't matter to me, how I looked. I know I was doing something important, and there wasn't time to freshen up. Maybe I should've just asked somebody else." 

"You did it perfectly. You were perfect. No one else could have delivered the profile to the public that professionally, and that astutely." 

Hotch stands up, and you don't know what to do. You decide to look up at him just as he takes your face into his hands. 

"No crying in bathrooms, okay? It would… it breaks my heart thinking about it. You come to me."  

Such a dramatic statement, yet Hoch lays it out like it's an unquestionable truth. No bravado, only a sincerity that makes your throat hurt. His frown slides back into place as his palms warm your cheeks. 

"You're so busy, I could never," you say, shaking your head. 

"Time and place, sure, but. I will always try to make time for you. I hope you know that by now." 

You nod dazedly. Hotch's hands drag with a pressure down to your neck, your shoulders, leaving tingling skin in their wake. He looks at you and time stretches, a few seconds pulled out of order. It's his closeness, and his affectionate, empathetic smile. 

You nod again. 

He relaxes. 

"Try and get some rest, okay? You need to take care of yourself. I know it's hard to ignore how you feel, I know today was hard, but you're one of the strongest people I've ever met. I have faith in you." He gives your shoulder a final squeeze. "Are you alright?" 

"Yeah," you say. It comes out much more quietly than intended.

"Rest, honey. Call me if you're upset again. I mean it." 

He smooths your cheek with the back of his forefinger and you wonder if this is some weird fantasy. Hotch makes for the door, and you know for sure it's real when he says, "And no more caffeine tonight." 

"No more caffeine," you agree. 

He doesn't realise he's twice as bad as a coffee. Your heart races all by itself, his phantom touch on your cheek. 

—

"Hi, beautiful," Derek says. 

"There's the girl of the hour," Rossi says. 

You roll your arm in a bow, eyes stinging from the bright lobby lights but otherwise quite happy. Hotch called you beautiful last night. Hotch called you honey. People on the Internet who have nothing better to do thought you looked gross, but Hotch thinks you're pretty. It's hard to focus on the negative with a positive that good. 

"Good morning, my favourite boys," you say sweetly. 

Spencer looks up from his book. "Hey." 

"You didn't say hello," you say, "you excluded yourself." 

Spencer frowns and goes back to his book. You offer him a mini cookie from your pocket and he perks up, better when you whisper, "You know you're my favourite, Reid." 

"We all know that's a lie," Emily says, rolling her small suitcase to your left and nearly trampling your foot. 

"Unfortunately so," Rossi agrees. 

"I'm afraid I don't know what you're talking about." 

"Hotch looks chipper this morning, doesn't he?" Derek asks, nodding. You follow his nod too quickly and give yourself away, earning a scattered round of laughter from your tired team. "Got you."

"Laugh it up," you say. You're on a high that can't be killed, even with their collective teasing. 

"Why are we laughing?" Hotch asks from behind you. 

You jump half out of your skin. 

"We were laughing at Y/N's swift observational skills, but we spoke too soon," Emily says.

Hotch takes a moment to smile at you. "Hey, you look a little more rested. Feeling better?" 

A flush rises to your cheeks. "Much," you say, sounding foreign to your own ears. 

Hotch gives a pleased nod and clasps your shoulder gently before manoeuvring around you. "Let me go see where JJ is." 

He walks around the lobby corner and into the hotel restaurant. You have your face in your hands before he's gone, harassed by quiet whistles and giggling. 

"She's so embarrassed!" Rossi cheers, like a proud dad. "How hopeless, young love." 

"Someone please shut him up," you beg, rubbing your aching eyes. It's an excuse to hide your smile a moment longer. 

"Are you still tired?" Spencer asks. "You look tired."

"She does not," Derek says severely. 

You raise your head with a smile. Tired or not, Hotch thinks you're beautiful. He liked seeing you on TV. You lavish the memory.

"I'm genuinely exhausted," you say eventually, a smile stretching from cheek to cheek as you stand tall again.

"I want whatever kind of tired you're feeling," JJ says as she arrives, Hotch a step behind her. 

You meet his eyes. You think he might not acknowledge what's been said between you —it wasn't strictly professional to have held your face in his hands like that, after all— and the beginnings of disappointment creep in, until he stands at your side, his fingertips brushing yours. It cannot be accidental. 

"She wears it well, doesn't she?" he asks the group. He gives no time for an answer. "Everyone ready?" 

You practically vibrate your way to the SUV. Not a bad case, as they go. 

 ˚ʚ♡ɞ˚

thank you for reading, so much! I hope you enjoyed! if you did and you have the time, please consider reblogging cos it makes me happy <3

[darlingsfandom]

stalker lenny miller x neighbour younger reader PLEASEE

You got it friend ✨

tw: stalking, stealing, he’s a creepy pervert!

not proofread.

“Hi Mr. Miller!” Rang in his ears making him turn around to see you standing there waving with your mail in your hand.

“Hi sweetheart, how are you?” He gave you a small smile. You walked across the yard in your little slippers since it was early morning.

“Pretty good! Love that we’re having colder morning again.” You smiled at him which made his heart skip a beat. “I wanted to give you your mail last night but you must’ve been asleep.” You had a few pieces of junk mail in your hand. Lenny’s job kept him busy and gone for days at a time so he had asked you to collect it for him.

“Thank you, I can always count on you!” He took the mail out of your hand making sure lightly brush his finger tips against your fingers. To say Lenny enjoyed you was an understatement. He watched you, everything you did he knew about it. Lenny had access to you 24/7 and you had no clue about.

“Do you want to come in for some coffee? I just made a fresh pot.” Lenny asked.

“That would be lovely.” He put out his arm for you to loop around. Once he had you inside he couldn’t help but think about how he could just keep you here, but he knew now was now the time. He helped you sit on the stool in front of the island in his kitchen.

“Sugar?” Lenny put a mug in front of you that looked similar to the one you had in your own kitchen. It was a simple red mug with black polka dots, what was even funnier is the fact that his mug had a chip in the handle just like yours!

“Yes please !” You put your hands in your lap as he poured the coffee for you. A small smile appeared on your lips before a quiet “thank you” left your lips. Lenny leaned on the opposite side of the island sipping his own coffee watching how you drank your coffee.

“So anything new ? How’s grandma doing over there? Better ?” Lenny asked.

“Eh nothing new. Grandma is grandma you know. We do our afternoon walks, she still does her bird watching from the porch but you won’t believe this… we went for the early bird special last week and she got flirty with another old man!” You giggled making Lenny laugh with you.

“Grandma still has it going on eh?” He laughed before the both of you made that face that said “ew” .

“Well at least one of us does.” You sighed into your coffee.

“Oh please, you’re beautiful Y/N, you could get anyone you wanted. You’re also smart, caring, funny and a very polite young lady.” Lenny spoke up making you stiffen as he moved closer with each word.

“Oh! Umm thank you… for everything , I gotta get going.” You jumped off your stool and quickly made your way back into your shared home with your grandma. Lenny watched carefully how you went back inside. He knew what he was doing. He didn’t care , he found it funny that you didn’t question why he had your coffee cup in his home, you didn’t notice that he had picked flowers out of your garden and put them in his kitchen.

That moment in the kitchen played in his head over and over as the days passed. You still smiled and waved at him when you crossed paths that you knew of. Lenny had taken some time off work to relax after his last mission with Anna or so he told his boss but it meant he could watch you more. He’d do normal things like take out his trash, check the mail, went for runs shortly after or shortly before you’d go on your walks, he’d even take up bird watching or so everyone thought! Why else would he have binoculars ?

It was the night you had just taken your grandma over to stay at her friends house because even in your eighties you still stay with your friends and to be fair she was just around the corner and Lenny caught out to this. He watched you pull into the driveway, lock the car and settle in for the night. He always thanked his lucky stars that his bedroom faced your bedroom window, well it was your grandmas storage room until you moved in with her to help her out seven months ago also known as when Lenny started stalking you.

You were mindlessly undressing in your room, tossing the dirty clothes into your hamper and walking into the bathroom to shower . Lenny had about twenty minutes to spare before you’d be done. He toyed with the idea for about thirty seconds before he was walking over to your home. The extra key was under the painted rock , of course he knew that! He let himself in quietly tip toeing along the carpet towards the stairs that for his sake were also carpeted , but he was still going to be smart about it.

The running water filled his ears when he passed your bedroom. He had to be quick , Lenny snuck into your bedroom and went straight for the hamper to steal another pair of your panties. He couldn’t take the ones you just had, that would be too obvious so he dug until he found an emerald colored pair and quickly ran off after making sure nothing else looked different. Once he was back downstairs Lenny took a deep inhale of your panties before he looked around your living room to see you had a magazine spread open , he arched an eyebrow and grabbed that too. It was a porn magazine but he didn’t care! It had your scent on it. The water had turned off and that was his signal to leave so he did, put the key back where it was and made his way back to his own house to his room and looked to see you standing there drying off completely clueless that he was just in there.

You finished drying off and turned to face to the window completely unaware that Lenny was watching you. You grabbed the lotion , put some in your hands and rubbed it slowly onto your tits which Lenny rubbed his dick through his pants watching you do your nighttime routine. He didn’t care that he watched you , stole your stuff or sent you some gifts. He sent you flowers at home and work, but the funny thing is… you never told him where you work just what you did! Lenny also sent little stuffed animals and he could tell you liked those because he seen them sitting on your dresser and what is even funnier is that he put a little bit of his cologne on the toys, so how you never made the connection ? You were as naive as he hoped.

Watching you day after day, week after week, month after month , Lenny was more than invested in you. He loved you. The gifts kept on coming, but he was careful not to send the same type of flowers or chocolates. He would watch from his kitchen window in the mornings to see you grab the paper from the porch and hoped you were in a tank top but it didn’t always happen.

“Mr. miller !” You waved at him with that same pretty smile he’s grown to love.

“Hello Y/N! How are you?” He asked throwing his trash into the trash can just like what were you doing.

“Good good, hey I know this is a long shot but have you seen anyone around ?”

“You’ll have to explain a little more my dear.” Lenny raised an eyebrow.

“Well you see I’ve been having these gifts dropped off on my porch and I just… I’m confused. There’s no notes or anything just a vase of pretty flowers!” You crossed your arms before looking at him with a sigh.

“I wish I had an answer for you dear but you know I’m not always home and when I do get home it’s pretty late, anyone crazy enough to deliver flowers that late.. “

“Yeah you’re right but it’s just strange because it’s always my favorite things like they’ve studied my brain or something.” A dry laugh left your lips .

“Maybe an ex lover ?” He shrugged .

“No no, haven’t had a boyfriend or girlfriend since high school! Hard to date these days.” You scratched your head before shrugging.

“Tell you what, I’ll keep my eyes open from now on and if I see anything I’ll tell you soon as I see it.” Lenny gave you smile that made you smile back before saying goodnight and heading back in. He had to run back in and double check the order for the newest gift he had.

His collection of you had grown full of your panties, magazines, only two coffee cups because those were too big to play off, some of your chapsticks, he even bought the same lotion you used on your boobs so he could have your scent on his hands at all times. You were his! But only he knew that and he liked it that way for now!