#everyone in this musical jst needs a hug

[scrumdiddlysdoodlies]

Care for a hit? 🥤

[lacharcutiere]

emptiness [sawamura daichi]

1k words

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part four of i'm gone i'm gone i'm gone miniseries. you can't put off decisions for forever, but you can definitely try.

JST: japanese standard time (GMT +9). EST: eastern standard time (GMT -5). EDT: eastern daylight time (GMT -4).

tings // fluff, soft angst & smut // i swear this søng is abøut eating øut my best friend's pussy - cøzybøy // dm, ask or comment to be added to taglist ! minors dni.

☾𓆙𓂻

— ARRIVAL: 17 MAY 2022. 04:23 JST.

daichi picks you up from the airport. you're in his arms before he can even think. he holds you tight, like he's trying to make up for nine months apart. he wants to kiss you, but he knows he can't.

you help him pile your bags into the trunk and climb into the passenger's seat. neither of you knows what to say. it's strange how you're right next to him yet it almost feels as if you're more distant than when you were half a world away.

☾𓆙𓂻

you sleep for most of the day, jet-lagged. around three, you wake up briefly to text tōru your address and tell him to come over for dinner; your parents want to meet him. then you pass out again.

at five, you're woken up by a knock on the door.

"it's me," tōru's voice calls from the other side.

"you can come in," you call back, rolling over to face him as he enters the room.

he laughs, you missed that laugh. "sleepy?"

"hmm." you move over a little, giving him some room to sit beside you. he brushes a bit of hair out of your face, still smiling.

"yeah, jet lag's a bitch."

☾𓆙𓂻

your parents love tōru; you wouldn't have expected otherwise. they seem a little surprised that now it's him and not daichi, though, and you can't say you're not, either.

— 23 MAY 2022. 13:02 JST.

daichi invites you out to lunch, at the same ramen place he took you to after that night, over a year ago. he introduces you to his girlfriend, tsuuka. she's pretty, sweet, friendly but demure, and very different from you.

(daichi told you to invite tōru, but he'd already promised to babysit for his sister. he promised to take you out another time to make up for it.)

it's awkward—you don't know what to expect. it's not even the fact that daichi's seeing someone and it's not you, or the fact that she's sitting right across from you. it's you. you don't know what to say to him; wouldn't know even if it were just the two of you alone in your bedroom.

☾𓆙𓂻

texts with tōru (you know you don't deserve him)

— 21:57 JST.

you're not falling out of love with tōru. but as you grind down on his cock in the reclined driver's seat of his car after what was meant to be a quick snack run, you have a moment of clarity where you know that what you're doing is wrong. to him, to daichi, to tsuuka.

(you love tōru. but can you even fall out of love with someone you're not in love with?)

— JUNE & JULY 2022.

you're... well. you can't say you're not avoiding daichi. you're not actively avoiding him, per se, and you still keep in contact over text pretty regularly, but you find yourself scrambling for excuses every time he asks if you want to hang out.

you're terrified that he's going to ask you what's going on, but thank god, he doesn't. and you know him well enough to figure that if he wants to talk about this, he's going to want it to be face-to-face.

instead, you pass the days with friends you haven't seen in what feels like forever, and of course, tōru. you come to love takeru (tōru whines that you can't help babysit anymore unless you stop ganging up on him).

the times when you do see daichi are only in groups of friends, and although you feel horrible about it, you do your best to keep your distance from him. to his credit, he doesn't say anything.

you come to hate being left alone with your thoughts, spending nights with tōru or kiyoko whenever possible and having music, podcasts, the radio, the tv—whatever—playing as you sleep when you're alone. silence inevitably leads to trying to figure out what the fuck to do, and after a couple nights of giving that a chance, you've come to the conclusion that there's no solution. (at least, no solution that you like. no ending where everyone comes out unhurt.)

— 3 AUGUST 2022. 01:32 JST.

the summer's worst nightmare comes true: you and tōru book the same flight back to new york. you realize you need someone to take you to the airport. it's a weeknight; your parents are out of town and his can't take off of work. most of your friends are already back in school. a taxi is your last resort, but tōru tells you he's figured something out. it's not until he's lying in your bed, your luggage and his all packed and ready to go, that you find out.

there's a knock at the door.

"that's our ride," he says.

you go to find daichi waiting outside.

they insist you wait in the car while they load the luggage. you lie down in the backseat and try not to cry.

☾𓆙𓂻

and then you're at the airport and it's, like, three in the morning, and the luggage is unloaded and.

and it's time to say goodbye again.

for some reason, this is worse than it was last year.

you look between the two of them as they share a quick hug and tōru thanks daichi for the ride, and then daichi looks to you and all you can think is, oh, shit.

"bye," you say, and he has the nerve to smile at you.

"what," he jokes, "i get a hug from tōru but not you?"

you can't help but to laugh. "i guess he's your boyfriend now." but something pulls you to him. and you're not resisting it, not even thinking about it, as you step forward and embrace him. you forgot what this felt like.

it only lasts a second, and then he's wishing you a safe flight and you're tugging your bags into the airport, and then you're checking in and going through security and then you're at the gate with an hour to kill before your flight and you're asleep with your head in tōru's lap.

taglist: @sakruisin-thru @softetsurou @oligbia

[kokiafans]

KOKIA YouTube livestream [2020.04.18]

KOKIA has just wrapped up today’s livestream. Sadly the video is now marked private at least on this end, but below a short report if you haven’t been able to catch it live.

Important notes:

KOKIA will be holding another livestream next week, on April 25, at 20:00 JST (same time as today). It was the original date for her Masquerade concert. Counter on the KOKIAfans website sidebar has been adjusted accordingly!

KOKIA’s Animal album will have a French release on May 15! She also mentioned we should look her up on Spotify and Deezer.

Most of the livestream was bilingual, and KOKIA started in her owl hoodie as she had noticed the popularity of the song Fukurou/owl on youtube. After kicking off with that song, she sang a short couple of lines for today’s theme: “1 to 1 live for you, stay safe stay home! Are you ready? Enjoy the music!”

 During the rest of the livestream, she mentioned how she wanted to reach out to everyone, despite not being able to give a physical hug now. ‘Now more than ever, we need to connect. Music is one of the most powerful ways to connect.’ She referred to the lines ‘I love you’ chanted in the song Ai wa kodama suru (’love echoes’) and then unveiled a song she wrote today: ‘I love you’, which is entirely in English.

Tracklist:

1. Fukurou ~Fukurou ga shiraseru kyaku ga kita to~ ('Owl ~a guest has arrived, the owl reports~') 2. Tsugi au toki wa ('next time we meet') 3. Usaghi (’rabbit’) 4. I Love You 5. Kokoro no rousoku (Candle in the heart)

See you next week, same time, same place!

[keerawrrr]

man.......helped celebrate a friend's bday yesterday. I had to work late so I couldn't quite make the dinner....but I went on break maybe 30 mins after they go to the restaurant; Juicy bad been snappin me....so I dipped out, showed up. whatever anyone hadn't finished on their plates they started passing to me lol I even got a full mug of root beer lol I said goodbye to everyone n I headed back to work got out of work at like 10:40, headed to the store cuz I wanted to get the girl some liquor for her 28th 🍻 picked up 2 MD 20/20s n was at their crib by 11:10 shit was bomb, a few co-workers were their, Juicy had got me a to go plate; got a lil music going n the games begun a game called Kings? I fcks wit it lol I really do. it was fun...we had a ball. one of my fav parts was when before we took a drink, we had to get spanked lol so when it was time for the waterfall part, everybody got up n got spanked lol sometimes we were so focused on our spankings we forgot we had to drink lol so Juicy had to be up for work at 4am, he kept putting it off cuz he was having fun, granted....so he aint dip til bout almost 2....I left their house at 3....well before I left, I had got hit wit this wave of nausea...I had been drinking n eating chicken n waffles....so many regrets....puked my guts out, easy peasy, life went on.....so as I get to my car, I wake Juicy so hes not late for work, I sit in the car n another wave hits; I puke like 3 times next to my car....call Juicy one more time, he answers, thanks me for the wake up but then he's like where are u? I say I'm downstairs in this weak ass voice, told him I just threw up...he hangs up on me lol I get myself together n go to pull out of the space, when this Megro pops up beside my car in his fckn socks lol I'm like wtf....n he goes wtf are u doing? I said um going home to my dog...he's jst like no the fck you're not, call so n so n tell them u need to lay on their couch, now. so I call, she says sure.... I park the car back n he wraps an arm around me n takes me back upstairs. low-key fussin to the girl how I was finna drive home lol, I crash on the couch....he leaves for work. they go to bed I think I woke up once to use the bathroom but it really wasn't that bad, the sleep was awesome. so 8 comes around n I slip out the house....the drive home was OK, I had my windows down....I didn't feel anything til I pulled up to my apts n couldn't put in my gate code cuz I really needed to barf....as I'm pulling thru the gate, this wave hits n I almost panic lol but I park, get out the car n get into my apt....n it was hell ever since before Juicy came over....cuz I couldn't handle the shit, the nausea was jst like....cry worthy lol...so before he showed up I puked a good 6 times maybe 7....I was told to drink water, so I tried, shit was fckn disgusting.... I'd drink the water, sit for 2 seconds n throw it up...even had to sit on the toilet wit a bucket in my lap a couple times smh.... Juicy comes thru with chicken noodle soup, a bag of bread n 2 gatorades; I had already begun trying to eat something....had some beef stew... n I nibbled on the potatoes, carrots n beef...like 5 pieces tops n jst couldn't do it; he walked in the room n saw me...wrapped his arms around my shoulders n jst hugged me n kissed my head lol n when I spoke it was barely a whisper I started sippin the Gatorade n it wasn't horrible...stomach moved around a bit but nothing drastic, n he made me stop forcing myself to puke; had a piece of bread, but like half of it...but idk, jst laying in his lap n having him rub my back....cuz I was cold, n shivery, felt beyond good. so he jst laid wit me, we talked, laughed, went over the night n how "Never Have I Ever" got couples put on the spot lol including us. I wanna say 40mins into the visit I started feeling better. I had been scheduled for work 2-11....I had called in but said myself that if I felt better I would go....had a manager saying she NEEDED me to go in by 5....Juicy told me I wasn't going to work, gave me this scenario that jst cuz I was feeling OK, dsnt mean it'll last, n I could get worse....-rolls eyes- lol it was sweet tho, plus I hadn't gotten much sleep so that did help for real he kept wrapping himself around me, laying on my chest or having me on his arm...n then had the nerve, as usual to be like, I gotta go now....yet still laying there n then blaming me lol he get on my nerves. & he kept staring at me all googley eyed, idk what his prob was lol, it was cute but dude I feel like n prolly look like pure shit, cut it out lol but we came to the conclusion that this here was a hangover....n based on what I went thru, I'd say it was my 2nd ever in life....fck....smh, no bueno. I thanked him for coming thru for me cuz i really couldn't deal alone...he took off to say goodbye n to take his nephew home; I drank more Gatorade n made me 4 pieces of toasr with butter....laid down n crashed til maybe 40 mins ago. now I'm bout to eat this chicken noodle n wait to crash again lol what a day n I dnt even know what time I work tmrw smh....fck me PS, Juicy is bae ❤❤ wit his cute ass lol

[gothsailormercury]

anon chain game: tag 10 of ur sweetest mutuals and what u appreciate about them, then copy n paste this ask n spread it around

i’m sorry this is so late but i was waiting to get to a computer so i could reply properly omg !!!

first of all.. i ofc hav to mention my ride or die @peachyhae. if u followed me on my last blog before i deleted u kno tht we’re a duo like.. if u follow one u hav to follow the other. shes the jelly to my peanut butter (im the pb since she cnt eat it sdiofjsd), the sailor mars to my sailor moon, the mac to my cheese. i would die for her at the drop of a hat u kno :-// & i lov that we can go a while without talking but once we talk again its like no time has passed. i lov her so much omg.

@gallaghurs i lov mackenzie so much!!!!! our sense of humor is the same & we both hav the same taste in music & shows. & shes so easy to talk to like i feel like i could talk to her for hours & not even realize how much time has passed. shes honestly the most attractive person i’ve ever laid my gay eyes on & idk man.. just gotta lov her tbh :-/

@lovbhobi melissa my sweet baby who thinks she’s grown soifsjof. i lov her so much like she always makes me laugh, i really do adore her personality sm. i just want to give her a giant hug for at least 5 hours u kno. she scares me w her kinks sometimes but its all good, i still adore u so much mel

@iluyeri qiu!! my angel!! the ryan to my shane oh my god. my favorite scorpio (& the only one i kno but shhhh). im not even kidding when i say this but i think out of everyone i talk to on here, it seems that we’re the most similar like we seem to both be into horror movies/true crime/unsolved mysteries/aliens & also ur taste in american music even tho we havnt talked much abt it!! & everytime i see a selfie of u my heart stops for a second bc ur so beautiful!! lov u!!

@4wllls my favorite lawyer omg. u always make me feel included & i lov that abt u like i feel like ur always looking out for other ppl & are so supportive. also ur sense of humor is so nice!! ur so kind & sweet & cute & ur selfies?? amazing works of art. van gogh who???? lov u darling!!!

@2rice kriya my virgo buddy!!!! ur so funny & random & i lov that so much omg. i really never kno what ur gonna say next tbh. also another thing i appreciate abt u is that ur short so if i was ever next to u i would tower over u omg. anyway i lov u so much, keep making me laugh & smile!!!

@signalbytwice my dear friend who always sticks up for twice sdoijosfdj. ok but rlly u made the gc & even tho i left for a little bit i plan on coming back bc i rlly am so happy u made it & i got to meet all of u & get to kno u all. but ur so funny like every post u make on here or peach has me laughing so hard. & ur so supportive of ur friends & willing to fight anyone & anything so i rlly admire u for that. also ur so pretty!!!! an actual angel tbh. lov u!

@alysiayeoh we’ve never talked but i lov seeing u on my dash so much!! anyone who reblogs kpop & dc stuff is automatically my fav!! & u seem so nice so im glad we’re mutuals!!

@6hyojong ysa!! an angel!!! ur so pure & sweet & adorable im just??? even tho ur not on peach much, it always makes me happy to see u posting on there. i’m so glad i found u again after i made this blog bc i cnt imagine not following u!!!

@softnamoo - first of all im sorry that i’m terrible at replying i just get so nervous omg. but ur always so nice to me & i appreciate that so much !! ur always saying i look good or cute & it makes me want to cry bc ur so sweet!! u seem like such a sweet person!! ily!

i want to tag so many more ppl like i wanted to tag everyone in the gc but i felt like i needed to mention other non gc ppl too but :-// jst kno that i lov all of my mutuals!!!! & im sorry this is so long omg

[we-are-the-sickness]

just do em all

1. selfieMoBile
2. what would you name your future kids?Vienna if it's a girl or James Taylor if it's a boy 
3. do you miss anyone?Definitely 
4. what are you looking forward to?Death rn
5. is there anyone who can always make you smile?My friends n their memes they KNO how to cheer me 
6. is it hard for you to get over someone?I think it depends on how much of myself Ive share w them ya know?
7. what was your life like last year?Confused and sad 
8. have you ever cried because you were so annoyed?@my mom u did dis
9. who did you last see in person?My parents
10. are you good at hiding your feelings?Generally
11. are you listening to music right now?Nope I just woke up lol
12. what is something you want right now?Peace n quiet 
13. how do you feel right now?Lil sad
14. when was the last time someone of the opposite sex hugged you?Last night 
15. personality descriptionTired mom friend who loves memes n loves to be light hearted bc she's been heavy hearted too damn longJst wanna raise bees
16. have you ever wanted to tell someone something but you didn’t?YES FAR TOO LONG
17. opinion on insecurities.I'm sad that we all have them
18. do you miss how things were a year ago?Fuck no
19. have you ever been to New York?Nope but I wanna!
20. what is your favourite song at the moment?The entirety of hardwired to self destruct like there's not one bad song !!
21. age and birthday?18 and my birthday is today whoop
22. description of crush.She smol she funny she lame as hell but she's also beautiful in the most innocent way she tries to make herself tough but Ive seen her from every angle and that's why I love her so much
23. fear(s)Clusters of holes yuck
24. height5'1
25. role modelCorey Taylor & James Hetfield
26. idol(s)^
27. things i hateWhen things aren't organized, petty arguments, when someone can so easily fix something but they just won't cause they are suborn 
28. i’ll love you if…U put memes in my mailbox
29. favourite film(s)Every xmen ever
30. favourite tv show(s)Daredevil, Grimm, bloodline, and I'm already calling that iron fist is a fave
31. 3 random factsI need to peeI have a justice for all poster on the wall in front of meMy toe nail is still broken
32. are your friends mainly girls or guys?It's p equal as of right now
33. something you want to learnTo sing better
34. most embarrassing momentI was at our local butcher shop I was only a little ginger toddler happy as can be loved going to this place w my mom, I usually could walk around and look at BBQ sauces or something while mom chose what we needed. It was thanks giving time and I saw this box that I THOUGHT had a turkey in it on top of this table. I just touched the box and suddenly the table fell over then shelves and shelves of sauces started falling over it was a domino effect and still to this day I don't understand it
35. favourite subjectAstronomy 
36. 3 dreams you want to fulfill?Raise beesSurround myself with peace and love and mountainsAnd have someone to share it w
37. favourite actor/actressBen m that is all
38. favourite comedian(s)JOHN MULANY
39. favourite sport(s)Archery coz I do it lmao
40. favourite memoryPlaying tag with my dog when I was a kiddo
41. relationship statusComplicated bc of distance
42. favourite book(s)Corey's....
43. favourite song everNo leaf clover 
44. age you get mistaken for25
45. how you found out about your idolWhen I was a kid our cable got turned off a lot so I spent a lot of time in my room with my dads construction radio listening to music. That's how I discovered everyone.
46. what my last text message saysHit that motherfrkn like button
47. turn onsU also enjoy peace and not hurting me constantly
48. turn offsU hurt me constantly and have a shit attitude and don't want organization
49. where i want to be right nowAway from here
50. favourite picture of your idolI WISH I WASNT ON MOBILE
51. starsignAquarius 
52. something i’m talented atIdk painting? Giving advice? Who knows
53. 5 things that make me happyHerY'allMusicWarm airCDs
54. something thats worrying me at the momentEverything 
55. tumblr friendsSO MANY
56. favourite food(s)Mexican food,,,
57. favourite animal(s)Wolf n bears
58. description of my best friendThey are kind and funny and make everyday brighter ❤️
59. why i joined tumblrAn old pal asked me to join 
60. ask me anything you want:0THANK U ❤️💗❤️